#we keep going because you have to but they're not changing it

[sunnywalnut]

I also would like to add as someone who takes medication- ask other people if it seems like your meds are working.

Especially if you take antipsychotics/stimulant drugs.

A lot of meds do have side effects that can be pretty mean. Or not work at all. But they also could just be working so good that you don't notice because you're so used to struggling that getting used to a new normal is ALSO a struggle.

"but why would you stop taking meds if they're working?" We're human. If something worked, and has worked for a while, we don't think "oh goodness I should keep doing this even though there's no increase of Good just to make sure the Bad doesn't come back!"

We think "damn this thing really isn't working the same as it once did. Idk if it works anymore. Maybe I should stop"

And to that I tell you WAIT!!

Talk to your roommates, your friends, your family. Ask them if they remember how you were struggling before your medication. Ask them if it seems like you're struggling still or what symptoms might look like they're starting to show up again.

"but how would they know what goes on in my brain?" Ohoho my friend that's the wonderful part! Mental health HAS PHYSICAL SIGNS!!

Forgetfulness can show up as losing your keys or phone even though they're in the same chair beside you.

Clustered brainspace/"confused thoughts"/brain static can look like struggling to do house chores or having to tear things apart in order to sort through them correctly or even changing tasks seven different times even though they don't make sense to anyone including you.

Depression or problems with executive function can look like not being able to take a shower even when you sit still for half an hour obsessing and feeling guilty about it.

And of course this is only three examples. There's so much more that could happen and show up in different ways(which I absolutely encourage people to add on their own) but please. Before you decide to go off your meds, go through the process of figuring out if they ACTUALLY don't work

Lest you turn out like me, three years of no meds on a steady decline.

Thank you.

Local PSA: invisible disability does NOT mean you can live your life like a "normal person" invisible disability meant that if a stranger looks at you in public they wouldn't know what's going on.

Like if a wheelchair user were to decide to run into a corner store to grab a candy bar because they know that their legs can last that long without, the cashier wouldn't know.

Or someone with "mild" scoliosis walking upright through their shoulder leans slightly to the left. Maybe they just have bad posture. The lady in the next isle thinks to herself.

The person with EDS or POTS or whatever sort of condition wearing compression gloves out and about. Perhaps it's a fashion statement?

Or what about the people with intestinal issues? They can look like "normal people" too.

You never know what someone is going through.

You never know what they might need to survive or if they're on the edge of a flare up or even if they are currently going through one just by one look.

I think both disabled and non disabled need to realize this. You're not "no longer disabled" because you can "live without" disability aids. They're there to help you. To make your life easier. If living without a cane is going to make it more likely you'll fall over and hurt yourself, use the cane.

If you need to sit down to do dishes or cut vegetables because you need to save your legs for taking out the trash, sit down.

If you need a shower chair because you don't know if you'll pass out, use the shower chair.

People are going to judge you regardless for multiple reasons out of your control.

I'd rather they judge you while you're being safe.

You don't need to struggle to be "normal."

You can just be you.

However that looks for you.

Use your disability aids.

[wilhelminyard]

compilation of nice/sweet things the foxes said to neil because even though they're a bunch of assholes who'll insult anyone in their vicinity they all just love him so damn much (part 2) :

ANDREW :

"I'm not here for your entertainment" "but as expected you are talented enough to multitask"

"you are neil josten and I am still the man who said he would keep you alive. I don't care if you use this phone tomorrow. I don't care if you never use it again. but you are going to keep it on you because one day you might need it. on that day you're not going to run. you're going to think about what I promised you and you're going to make the call."

"I'm not afraid of you" "that's why you're so interesting"

DAN :

"don't thank us, remember us. we're your teammates. we're here to help you with whatever you need."

"you've got us now"

"that was perfect. but don't do something that reckless again. we can't replace you. hear me?"

"neil, you can use the girls' shower while we're busy"

MATT :

"just try not to think about it until we get there. you won't do yourself any favorite if you spend the ride stressing out about things you can't change."

"if you don't have anywhere to go, I'll drag you home with me"

KEVIN :

"if you get hurt out there, you do something about it. you take it easy, you have coach pull you, you ask abby for help - I don't care. if you ever say 'I'm fine' about your health again I will make you rue the day you were born"

"neil has no place in riko's games. he is a fox."

"run. it's the only way you'll survive"

"you should be court."

"will you still teach me?" "every night."

"I will watch you. if you want to drink tonight. I won't let you say something you'll regret." "you'll be drunk inside an hour. then who'll stop me?" "I would stop drinking."

"you're not going. do you know what he'll do to you?"

WYMACK :

"why did you pay for stalls coach?" "maybe I knew you'd need them one day"

"neil, if you can't be here say so. abby can take you elsewhere until it's time to leave. get out of here and get some fresh air."

"what can I do?" "I don't know" "when you know, tell me"

"sometimes the world feels so big but then I'm reminded how small it is" "big or small just remember you're not alone in it."

"if riko really was behind it somehow, the blame is all on him. he chose to take out his petty rage on seth. he chose to cross a line. you didn't. you hear me? you didn't. don't ever blame yourself for seth's death. that it too dangerous a road to walk down. you keep your eyes on your own path and keep moving forward"

"neil" "I'm fine" "be fine inside where it's warmer"

"look I know I've always told you all to take your personal problems up with betsy or abby. I've said it's not my place to get into anything outside the court. I hope you've figured out by now I'm just blowing hot air. I'm not real good at being a shoulder, but I do have a working set of ears."

"help me" "let me"

"this doesn't mean anything. I'm still a fox." "of course you are."

NICKY :

"kid you're killing me. why do you always get that deer-in-headlights look when someone does something nice for you?"

"you worry about neil's career. I'll worry about his personal happiness."

"I didn't really get into the gritty details last time because those aren't reallt dan and matt's business, but you're family, so I can tell you."

"there's obsession and there's dysfunction. you can't make exy your end-all be-all. this won't last forever, okay? you'll shine bright, then you'll retire, and then what? you gonna spend the rest of your life at home alone with all your trophies? you can't be just this, neil. this isn't enough to live for."

"thanks for taking one for the team, neil. you're a real friend."

"are we? friends?" "you are going to be the absolute death of me. yeah, kid. we're friends. you're stuck with us, like it or not."

"I only see that look on neil's face when someone tries to do something nice for him, but we all know kevin's as bratty as they come. what did you say, kevin, and do I need to defend neil's honor or what?"

RENEE :

"I am not the girl I once was but the shade of my old life will always existe inside of me. that is what helps me connect with andrew. I am hoping it will help me connect with you."

"I do not know your story. if you've trusted andrew with anything, he hasn't shared the details with me and he never will. but if you are as like us as we first predicted you to be, perhaps one day you can also come to see me as a friend."

"if either andrew or I can help you, please know we are here."

"and you neil? are you all right?"

[codenamestasis]

When Hitler killed millions of Jewish people (and others who were deemed "undesirable"), his evil was obvious. When the colonizers murdered natives without batting an eye, their evil was obvious. When anything like this that isn't widely known happens, we can spot the evil easily, especially with hindsight.

We're living in a new era of evil people. Their killing and genocides are far less obvious (in Billionaire US) and, hey, they have all sorts of mechanisms to hide behind. They control the narrative via the news outlets that they own, they control our government and they have us hating each other to keep our focus off of them and the wretched deeds they're doing.

Which brings me to Brian Thompson, United Healthcare's former CEO. Did he walk into hospitals and/or homes and put guns to anyone's heads? Did he or his executives pull life support and cackle as they did so? No. They hid behind "denying claims" for profits.. which pulled the life support for them.

People died, people ARE DYING, because of greed that won't stop. We tried changing things "the right way" via legislation, peaceful protests, even lobbying.. but we couldn't beat the cash flow. When people are desperate and they see no other way out, violence becomes the only answer. The only thing these ghouls value more than money are their own lives.

Which is why i must say.. Luigi Mangione is a hero. And just look at them.. they are trying so hard to turn us against him however they can bc they are scared. They see that we see that it's not the right vs the left.. it's the rich vs the poor. In their fear, they're showing us that the life of ONE CEO is more valuable than all the kids who have died in school shootings and all of Brian Thompson's victims, etc etc.. and that's on top of watching billionaires being appointed to government positions, even sadistic ones like Elon Musk. Large scale evil isn't obvious when you're in the middle of it and it's hard to see when they're doing everything they can to hide it from us. We have to keep going. That's my stance.

(And honestly if you couldn't tell that from my writing, i dunno how to help ya >.>)

DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT CONDONING VIOLENCE.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

im so excited for the new yuu... waiting for them to join the manga yuu family...... is there any traits you'd like them to have? maybe to parallel or completely contrast jamil, since he's the OB boy this time around?

tbh I hope they keep it up w the different body types rep 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ it's nice to see that even if they keep the "pretty average boy/girl" motif (?), they are trying different stuff w them. I hope we have more varied yuus in the future (goes for the anime too !!! I'm curious to see what that yuu is going to be like as well- or if they're just gonna adapt the manga and nor change the yuus, I wouldn't mind that either tbh)

[Referencing this news! More about the mangaka here.]

I don't really have a preference for what traits the new Yuu for the Episode of Scarabia has. I can't really find myself getting invested in the manga Yuus because I know that they won't stick around for very long (and definitely not long enough to have any sort of meaningful character arc). I also think it's disappointing that we get these characters that seem to be intentionally designed to be foils to the OB boys, but we never really get additional interactions between the Yuu and the OB boy that would add more meaning to their relationship or flesh out how that Yuu helps the OB boy change over time. Real missed opportunity there.

Some common ideas I've seen floating around for the Scarabia arc Yuu are:

Princess Jasmine coded (and/or at least femme) Yuu

someone in a servant position but, unlike Jamil, they are not resentful of their role and instead is optimistic about the future

"rags to riches" Yuu

I also know that some people are hoping for a dark-skinned or a Middle Eastern Yuu, but this in of itself is not a character trait so I'm not counting this in the list. Ideally I would like more variety in our Yuus (not just in race or gender, but in other factors like age or occupation) but I don't know how likely it will be that Twst actually commits to it (especially since the latter may change the interactions by a lot). I'm not even sure if they'd step outside of the box for designs/backstories if it doesn't contribute anything to the narrative foils they're trying to set up. Like, I'm pretty sure the manga team didn't decide to make Yuuta (the Yuu for Octavinelle) a large boy for the sake of diversity but rather to show Azul you can still love yourself and be content even if your body is a certain way. (I discuss the manga Yuus and how they contrast with their respective OB boys more here!) I don't see what making the Scarabia Yuu dark-skinned, Middle Eastern, or a different body type does to add to or enhance Jamil's character. It's not like Yuuka (for Savanaclaw) had to be dark-skinned or African to be Leona's foil, or Yuuken (for Heartslabyul) had to be small and British to be Riddle's foil, right? But both Yuuka and Yuuken were physically fit; we had a strong woman (with a scar in her design to match Leona) that played righteously to contrast Leona's underhandedness and a disciplined but kind man to show Riddle you can maintain a level of sternness without being overbearing on your peers. They were given character traits, rather than solely physical traits, which reflect their OB boy. It would be great to have the diversity, yes! Again though, I don't think the mangaka are designing Yuus with diversity in mind, but rather what the design does for the characters of the OB boys.

Finally, in regards to the anime, it has been announced to be an adaptation of the manga. That, presumably, means we will see the manga Yuus of each book's arc animated. Until we get news that states otherwise, I'm assuming this to be the case.

[fuck-customers]

Workers should be allowed to be pissy and angry all day, every day at work. Of course, it will bring everyone's mood down, but if everyone keep saying that everyone hates working, no one likes having a job, etc. Wouldn't it make sense to feel pissy and act angry every time you're at the one place that would most definitely make you feel that way? If it feels like something humanity desperately wants to change for the better or avoid entirely; I mean, we can all be fake happy for the rest of our lives , no doubt, but I feel work is the one true place where our emotions and feelings are natural and true. Where we have to practice decorum, respect, and discipline. Figuring out who you are, what you want, and cooperating with those around you. Like, work isn't just going to a place and doing stuff, it's to be forced to conquer your fears every day. I'm not going to be happy knowing I, and apparently the majority of the workforce, basically don't live. Just work. Working to have two days worth of your own personal life that you desperately want to create. We can all make a sucky situation better, but come on. Let's be real, and let these hard workers (which is all people whose job it is to stay alive) say and do whatever it takes to make them stay at work, and do the work. Otherwise, they would absolutely leave, but you can't keep running forever.

Also, help people who are angry at work. The problem isn't that they're always in a bad mood, it's having to experience this trauma over and over with little to no help because "everyone hates it" yeah, but some people already have discipline and some people need to learn. And others are still learning and will probably continue to do so.

I think the best way to help is to listen, and agree when they say this job is hard.

Posted by admin Rodney

[thathomestar]

played through the black mesa blue shift mod, up through the xen chapter since that's all they've released so far. the mod aims to remake the entirety of blue shift in the style of black mesa, and boy howdy does it deliver on that, for better and for worse.

they actually establish a couple supporting characters, more security guards and scientists, which is nice. in the original game it was basically just dr rosenberg, so more named characters is a good change imo. feels like you're actually rallying people together to fight your way out of black mesa.

a weird thing this mod does is take away player control sometimes. i can understand it for specific sequences, like when the elevator crashes at the beginning or when you first teleport into xen, but it also does it for some mundane things too, like inserting a keycard into a switch. why? half-life's whole thing is letting the player be in control the whole time.

the first few chapters are well paced, but it starts feeling like its padding a bit when you go off to find dr rosenberg. you have to do this whole song and dance moving a train back and forth and turning it around properly on turntables to bust him out. they could have cut out some of the tedium there a little.

my problems really start when it comes to the xen chapter. the original blue shift xen chapter lasts for roughly 30-40 minutes for a first time player, though someone like me was able to speed through it in under 15. with the black mesa mod, they have stretched out the runtime of this chapter to 3 hours.

it starts off pretty strong, you're making your way through xen, taking in the sights and finding all the stuff the previous science teams have left behind. about 90 minutes in i was wondering when i'm gonna get to the focal point relay thing, the whole reason calhoun goes to xen in the first place.

but instead you keep detouring through black mesa outposts and alien factory things and it just gets so long in the tooth. it'd be one thing if you get to one of these places and you're there for 5-10 minutes at most, but you typically spend over 20, sometimes even 30 minutes at these places.

there's one bit where you inexplicably decide to jump on the back of one of the giant flying manta rays and it flies around for like 15 minutes like an autoscroller section until it gets shot down by alien railguns, and then you spend 30 minutes making your way over to and destroying the railguns. and the whole time i'm just like... when are we getting to the focal point thing.

so finally you get to the focal point relay and turn it on but it gets jammed by a signal so you spend another 40 minutes blazing through ANOTHER alien factory so you can blow it up and you make your way back to the focal point thing and the portal's open but alien controllers keep telekinetically grabbing you and yanking you away from it... and it's just so exhausting. i got burned out.

not to mention the weirdness with how they handle vortigaunts. so in black mesa they do this whole thing in xen to show that the vorts are slaves and don't actually want to fight you, but calhoun never encounters any of that stuff. for the first 2/3rds of xen in this mod, vortigaunts are constantly trying to kill you non-stop. then all of a sudden they don't attack you anymore. why? because i, the player know they're not really bad? why would calhoun know that? it doesn't really make sense to me.

xen is cool. i like xen. if you told me "we're adding more xen to blue shift" i'd be like alright that's cool. but 6-8 times more? that's way too much. xen in blue shift was never meant to be a long trip. calhoun was supposed to get in, find the focal point relay, align it, and leave, not go on a grand alien gallivanting adventure. that's for gordon to do.

[raccoon-coded]

I love this scene so much. It is so powerful.

You can see it in his face. This is the moment where Rocket transforms into the person we know him as in Vol. 1.

In this moment he realises he's truly alone. He got to fly into the sky but his friends didn't. And even if he blames the High Evolutionary more, he still blames himself too. It's survivor's guilt. Maybe if he had run when he had the chance, he could've succeeded in at least getting the other two out of there, but by the time he'd stopped seeing red, it was too late. They'd begged him to stop. To go. He didn't listen. He'd promised them all he'd fix it. He'd promised to show them the sky. He'd failed.

In this moment we see Rocket harden.

He's lost his innocence. He is never going to be naive enough to be manipulated again. He won't ever let himself be caged again. He won't be touched by cruel hands again, and be won't be used.

To ensure this, he won't ever trust again. Because he trusted his creator and he was betrayed.

He won't ever love again. If he cares about someone, he'll let them down and they'll get hurt. The only ones he ever loved are gone and all that's left in their place is pain.

And if love only brings pain, then he doesn't want it.

He will not allow himself to be hurt again.

There is so much pain he's holding onto. But he's already cried and that got him mocked. It lost him time he could have used to help his remaining friends escape. So he pushes it down and focuses on the other feeling: the rage. More than anything right now, he's angry. Angry at the cruelty, angry at the injustice, angry at himself, angry at the whole damn universe. Anger is easier than grief, so he latches onto it. Grief will only slow him down, but anger will keep him going. It was the anger that had granted him his freedom, after all.

He will keep going and he won't show mercy to anyone who stands in his way. Why should he? He wasn't shown any. His kind, innocent friends were shown none.

If the only way to survive in this galaxy is to be cruel and calculated, then he'll be cruel. If his friends had been less kind, less trusting, and more ruthless, maybe they'd still be here with him. But they weren't, and they're not. He's the last one standing.

He's alone.

...

Thankfully his resolve changes with time as he does find good people to trust and to love, but it takes him a very long time to get there and he self sabotages along the way. He was so young at the time and this experience shaped his whole life view. It took a lot for him to shake these values that had helped him to survive for so long, and to realise that they had become detrimental to him. But he got there eventually, and for maybe the first time in his life, he's finally genuinely happy. He's finally free from his past and has let go of the guilt and self hatred that he's carried for so long. He has a family who loves him and who he loves in return, and he has a purpose in life. Rather than hurting others for his benefit like he used to, now he's helping them. Protecting those who can't protect themselves. Maybe he couldn't do that before with his first friends, but he can now with others who are counting on him now. Rather than hating the galaxy like he once did, he's found love for it.

He no longer feels so alone.

And I'm so damn proud of him.

[baphometsss]

The only way I can accept the bullshit they pulled with her in this game is if she's manipulating Solas into maintaining the Veil for now because she has something else up her sleeve and the Veil needs to stay up for that to happen. It would be more in keeping with her character since she has basically been using Solas like a tool since the moment she met him as a spirit in the Fade. She has a propensity for using men, as you pointed out, and he also stole her power and tried to destroy a part of her (as well as rebelling against her and pissing her off in a number of ways we probably don't even know about). Tinfoil hat time here but what if Solas was someone she wanted revenge on too? Sending him to the Fade to fix their mistakes would be one way of going about it.

I know it's a long shot and with the way things are going, DA5 will probably titled Dragon Age: Gotham Knights or something and feature Neve battling some Joker knock-off in an even more watered-down Thedas. We won't get to see how Thedas has changed since the Blight, but just the end products of it. No more slavery, the Crows are good guys now, Ferelden somehow rebuilt itself, Mages are happy, the Dales belong to the Elves once more, etc. It'll just be done in a blank period.

But!! If they get their shit together and actually deliver a decent game that isn't horribly derivative of Marvel/DC, I can see Mythal being either a Big Bad or the Big Deus Ex Machina saviour like she has been in the last couple of games. I'm kind of torn if I want that though, because I think they've overused both her and Morrigan somewhat. There can, in fact, be several great women in Thedas's story, but it seems like they're dead set on there being one single woman at the root of all of them. (This is kinda why I hate the Mythal is Andraste theory. Sorry, but no. It can't all be Mythal.)

I think the bottom line is that they were planning on having Mythal be much more of a villain in this game, but it ultimately became Solas-centric instead. She becomes a figurehead for all his motivations, even though, in the end, it boils down to him being unable to accept the weight of his own failures. However, she and Solas were plotting separately for thousands of years, too. She wouldn't have waited around for him to do it for her. Him bringing down the Veil might have disrupted the plans she was making too.

Tbh though I'm being too generous to this studio and they probably just watered her down bc Woman Good Man Bad and don't want to follow through on the story they built up about a morally complex woman. Still, it doesn't hurt to theorise.

Sorry, but I just don’t buy the whole “actually Mythal decided after centuries of wandering Thedas as Flemeth that modern people deserve a chance” thing. Because the fragment of Mythal we’re talking about is the jaded old swamp witch who

-Inhabited the body of a woman betrayed by her lover(s) because they found common ground in their suffering and the injustices done to them. (“Once I was but a woman, crying out in the lonely darkness for justice.” - DAI)

-Resents that betrayal to the point she views men as disposable playthings that she can lure back to her hut, have her way with, and then… murder? I think? (Based on Morrigan’s own account in DAO)

-Abused her daughter under the guise of tough love in an attempt to prepare her for a cruel uncaring world. (Again, Morrigan’s account, DAO)

-Says during her appearance in Inquisition that she will have her reckoning.

-Spent centuries consolidating her power as well as cycling through different human women’s bodies via questionable means for the sake of bringing about said reckoning. (“I have carried Mythal through the ages ever since, seeking the justice denied to her.” and about the Inquisitor: “A Herald indeed. Shouting to the heavens, harbinger of a new age.” - DAI)

-During her scene with Solas at the end of Inquisition does NOT say ANYTHING about disagreeing with Solas’s plans, just that she considers him and old friend and is sorry things are going the way they are. (Seriously, is the dialogue in that regret scene in Veilguard supposed to be from a mental connection they had? Because that dialogue just isn’t in the Inquisition scene.)

And I’m supposed to believe that in her last moments, Flemythal backed off and went “actually I think we need to maintain the status quo”????

None of this paints a picture of someone who has gone soft over time. At least not to the degree that is presented in that regret scene in Veilguard. Sure Flemeth wasn’t all bad, she had some tenderness to her. She shows some genuine care for Morrigan and Kieran (if present) and seems hurt when Morrigan implies she was trying not to be the kind of mother Flemeth was to her.

At the end of Inquisition, we can’t tell for certain to what degree she approves of Solas’s methods. But it seems like a step in said methods was to absorb her power and doom her, an embodiment of Justice, to take a passive role once more. And we know what happens when a spirit is denied its purpose. Justice denied its purpose could turn to Vengeance. Which, to me, feels like it would better echo the themes of Solas’s pride/wisdom duality, inquisition’s themes around what it means to become a god-like force of nature, DA2’s question of whether violence is necessary for revolution (which literally has the Justice/Vengeance duality in it with Anders), and DAO’s theme of sacrifice for the greater good.

[manda-kat]

Sometimes you really just have to let people be mad at you.

I've known several people with anxiety, RSD and other personal hurdles that lead them to be super aware of tone changes and anything that may hint at a person being angry or upset at them. A lot of those relationships didn't end very well, but hey- my heartbreak can be your learning opportunity! (This is especially important if you know you have a tendency to overthink relationships)

It's okay to just let the other person be mad at you!

Here's a story that's happened to me a few times. Someone meets me, becomes my friend and everything is great until one day I suddenly change. I give them a weird tone or I don't respond like I usually do. I must be angry at them. They ask if I'm angry at them. I say no. They aren't convinced. Every time they ask me, I tell them I'm fine. They don't know how to make me tell them what's bothering me. I become more distant every time they ask. Finally it comes to a head and they're convinced I hate them and they've ruined the entire relationship by being a terrible person.

Meanwhile, on my side of things, we're both enjoying life until one day out of the blue they ask if I'm angry at them. I have no reason to be angry at them. I say no. They continue to ask over and over again, each time getting reassurance that I'm not angry. It comes to a point where I'm pretty sure I must be doing something to upset them, but I have no idea what. We both become convinced the other person hates us.

If you ever feel stuck in this kind of situation, please try to just let it go. When you ask 'are you mad at me' and they say 'no'- take it as a no! You might not be as good at reading emotions as you think you are. Me personally? I have trouble expressing my emotions- especially over text. But for some reason, telling them that didn't help. They were convinced that they knew how I felt and that I was lying about not being angry.

So if you ask someone 'are you mad at me?' And they lie and tell you 'no'... that's a them problem. Either they don't want to push the issue OR they actually aren't upset at all. Either way, they won't want you to keep asking. If they're mad, let them be mad. They'll get over it easier if you don't keep bringing it up.

They're a big, mature person who can make their own emotional choices and can pick their own battles. If they AREN'T mature enough to deal with their emotions in a healthy way, then forcing them to keep addressing those issues is only going to upset both of you!

You don't need to face their feelings for them. They don't need to admit their frustration with you. If they're hiding their own feelings, then it's usually out of kindness. You don't need to know every single time someone is mad at you. That sounds like torture. Your friends don't want to torture you.

If you keep asking and pushing, then when you do finally upset them, they won't feel safe telling you because you've convinced them you're emotionally needy and can't handle negative feedback. Even if you're just trying to be mature, you can end up convincing them of the opposits.

Your relationships are going to develop their own spoken and unspoken rules over time, but a good rule of thumb is: ask once. If you REALLY think they're being dishonest with you, ask again, making it clear that you just want to make sure you haven't done anything wrong. If they insist they're fine, then they're fine. Move on.

It might be hard to just take someone's word for it and it feels like open communication may be the only way to keep a healthy relationship, but sometimes you need to have a little faith in your friend. Sometimes you need to be able to let sleeping dogs lie. If it's important enough for them to tell you, trust them to tell you.

Don't overcommunicate your friendships to death.

[blueflamebimbo]

CHAPTER 2: SCRAPES

𓆩♡𓆪 ──"VITAMIN DARLING": KAMINARI DENKI X READER

A/N: Part 2 of "Vitamin Darling", my childhood friends to lovers drabble collection, all thanks to my love for Denki. In this chapter, we find out how Denki taught you more than one lesson, when you were seven years old.

Warnings: f!reader, mention of minor skateboard injuries.

Word count: 1,135

𓆩♡𓆪 ── back to Vitamin Darling masterlist

You're seven years old when Kaminari Denki takes you by the hand and drags you to the empty parking lot behind his house. It’s the summer of your first year of primary school, and although it is terrifying to start anew, the burden is lightened by your best friend; Denki is just as nervous, but he has been there to hold your hand the entire time. Such are the benefits of ending up in the same class together.

Ever since you met him in kindergarten, Denki has been somewhat of a constant in your life. Your mother and his have gotten so close that they've started going on shopping trips without the children being involved, your father and his have become permanent tennis buddies, and even your cat seems to like the yellow-haired boy more than he likes your brother. Granted, your brother is a bit of a butt-head, so that's not too surprising.

Denki places the skateboard down onto the concrete ground and beams at you expectantly. It’s impressive how much he has changed in three short years. No longer a blubbering mess, the boy has gained some confidence.

"It's because you're my friend," he explained as he was pushing you on the swings in his backyard, a few weeks ago. "Things aren't as scary when you've got good friends, ya know?"

Denki is half an inch shorter than you are, but sometimes even you have to admit that you look up to him. It’s like he has an infinite pool of positivity to draw from, these days, and it's contagious, like he's some type of happiness vitamin. Besides, Denki says he can feel a growing spurt coming. Supposedly, he can feel it in his toes. Personally, you think it's just another wart growing on his big toe, but you don't have the heart to tell him he should probably throw out his old shoes and get new ones. The bright blue converse sneakers on his feet have holes in them, but he says they're his lucky pair - they help him skate better.

He's still looking at you expectantly as his right foot rolls the skateboard back and forth, and he’s holding out a hand now.

"I can hold your hand while you try it out, if it's too scary," he offers.

With a petulant huff, you roll your eyes and confidently stride up to the board.

"Who says I'm scared?!"

Denki grins, as he usually does, and explains where to put your feet.

Skating is one of the only things you don't do together. There's a couple of boys in your class who are quite good at it, and they taught Denki how to do it after school at the beginning of the year. That was three months ago, and it's starting to gnaw at you how much you're feeling left out. It doesn't make sense to you, either. Surely, if you put your mind to it, you can master this and join them from time to time. After all, if boys can do it, how hard can it be?

As it turns out, it's not as easy as it looks. The wheels on the board are far too slippery. Are they even supposed to roll that fast? You've barely put your foot on when the board slides forward and puts you on your ass.

Denki is on you like lightning, and he's chewing his lip like he usually does when he's worried about something. He looks like he's about to ask you if you're okay, so you wave him off and mutter something along the lines of "stupid board" and "I just wasn't ready yet".

He explains how it's important to keep leaning forward instead of backwards, so the board can't get ahead of you. It helps, a little, but it still takes eight tries for you to successfully balance yourself. Once you've got it down, however, Denki looks at you with so much pride, you don't even care how much your tailbone is hurting right now.

His smile instils you with so much confidence that you kick forward with a matching grin stretched across your face, but the force of the kick and your sense of balance don't match up, and the board is kicked backwards while your body is catapulted forward. The salopette you're wearing does nothing to protect your knees as you skid across the concrete.

Back at Denki's house, the boy wastes no time to pull out a box from underneath the sink. He’s watched his mother do this countless times over the past few months. He has the battle scars across his knees, elbows and chin to prove it, so he knows what he's doing as he cleans the scrapes on your knees with antiseptic.

It stings. Whether your knees or your self-esteem have taken a bigger blow, you can't really tell. What you do know, is that it's unfair. It’s unfair because, of the two of you, you were the first to learn how to swim and the first to learn how to ride a bike. How is this any different? And why now, when your friendship with Denki is on the line? What if he ends up spending all of his time with the other kids, because they know how to skate and you don't? Your knees hurt, but the thought of losing your best friend hurts even more, and it's enough to make your bottom lip wobble.

Cool air hits your knees. Denki is blowing on the antiseptic that’s covering way more skin than just the scrapes. He's not entirely sure why he should blow on antiseptic, but he's seen his mom do it every time, so he's positive that it's absolutely, super-duper necessary.

"You were so cool today," he mutters as he meticulously sticks Pokemon themed band-aids to your knees. "Remember how I told you it took me a whole week before I was able to stand upright on a skateboard?" He continues, "Wait until I tell the others that you were able to do it in one day, they'll go nuts."

The wobbling of your lip stops, then, and you look up.

"You don't think I looked dumb?" you ask.

Denki's eyes grow wide.

"Dumb?!" he exclaims, and it's loud. He's always loud. But not in an annoying way, you think. He's Denki, so he's allowed to be loud.

The yellow-haired boy grins again, and suddenly your knees don't sting anymore.

"You could never be dumb," he states, as if it's something that he knows to be true. "You're my best friend," he continues, "And you're the coolest person I know."

When you're seven years old, Kaminari Denki teaches you how to master a skateboard. He also teaches you that the right people will always include you in what makes them happy.

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Like I think about pensions and retirement and working until I'm in my 60s and I wonder why I would want to be there for it when the only thing that I have to look forward to is shitty work for barely-enough pay for most of my life, up until I finally get to go (if I have my 40 years worth of trimesters) and enjoy life on a pension too small to do anything with. I literally hung out with my best friend today and we made hot chocolate and I think about retirement and suddenly I forget about every good thing in life

[roseyswords]

I think it comes from viewers having experience with shows just changing their female characters once they're pregnant. A lot of shows have used pregnancy " ooh what a twist " move that comes with a lot of bad writing. Sometimes character/ relationship arcs get changed in a way that you can tell was not planned. I think this is a similar reason as to why a lot of fans don't seem to have a lot of faith in the show. It's why don't trust the show to properly address things like Stolas's classism properly even though the show has shown that this is something that they are treating with care and intention. Because they've felt like a lot of other shows didn't address issues with their characters in a satisfying wayand so they don't trust that Helluva Boss will. It's like how Mike Shur shows get a lot of praise for their relationships even after they get together in the show , because it's so common for other shows to keep their relationships interesting without ruining the relationships in question and frustrating the audience. So while I think it is maybe fair to be a little wary of how it's gonna go, I don't think we should treat it as a forgone conclusion that it's going to be bad.

Not exactly sure why people believe Millie's pregnancy means she's 100% going to be shelved as a character if she decides to go through with having the baby.

I feel like the weapons scene in Sinsmas during the fight with Andrealphus was pretty good foreshadowing that her and Moxxie are going to swap weapons classes, with her using firearms and Moxxie using more close combat methods. With the addition of Loona to the team during missions it might not even be a bad idea to have both Millie and Moxxie using firearms while Blitzø and Loona are close combat. Hell, even in a pinch they could put Stolas through a training montage in hand-to-hand combat cause he sure showed some potential while he was beating the shit out of Andrealphus. 😂

Basically I don't think the pregnancy is a death sentence for Millie becoming a background character now.

[starry-bi-sky]

i have... ✨Danyal Al Ghul Headcanons✨ but specifically for my yaelokre danyal oneshot

There's also the tumblr post here but I recommend the link in the title because its the ao3 version, and that one is edited and has some stuff in it that's not in the tumblr post, and will be the version I'm using.

So for summary: this Danyal is also from a Demon Siblings Au where Danny is five years older than Damian. However, things turned out a bit differently, and Danny and Damian had a fantastic relationship with one another. Danny loved music and regularly came up with songs to sing to Damian with. Specifically the folk band Yaelokre's EP "Hayfields" (seriously go fucking listen to it its sooo good. Harpy Hare is the second song but its my favorite. Special shoutout to @gascansposts for introducing the band to me)

He falls off a train when he's twelve and Damian is seven while the two of them and Talia are on mission. He ends up with magically induced amnesia and wakes up in Arkansas while the Fentons are on their yearly Divorce-iversary visit to Aunt Alica, and since he can only remember his name, he ends up being taken into their care.

---------------

Yaelokre Danny has the same facial scar as Things in Threes Danyal, since he was initially another version of him where things turned out better. I'm debating on whether or not I should take it away however, and give him a different scar (maybe from when he fell off the train?), just because the scar is a pretty key identifier for Ti3 Danyal.

-----------------

Danny frequently visits Aunt Alicia in Arkansas! Well, only after he gets settled in and stuff. He doesn't really like the city that much and prefers the countryside where Alicia lives. I know she lives in a cabin but I'm changing it to a farm, so she puts Danny to work and gets him to help her.

I don't want to confine his hobbies to only being star stuff, because people tend to have more than one hobby and I feel like it reduces him to one-dimensionality, so he likes to garden, and learns guitar. His room becomes filled with plants, and he turns their roof into a rooftop greenhouse right below to OPS Center.

He has a complex relationship with the weapons from his past, but he's not... like... appalled by it? When he finds his weapons in the Fenton attic all he thinks is that they're his weapons, and he starts carrying a knife on him afterwards. Essentially he becomes fascinated with weaponry because its one of the few physical ties he has to his past, and while he's not training like he is in the League, he allows his strong muscle memory to guide him through his katas.

Danny likes climbing things. This causes Problems For Everyone Else.

----------------

Danny was not the "kinder Al Ghul" in the League. His kindness extended to his brother and family, and that's it. To everyone else he had high expectations out of them, and the pride you'd expect from the grandson of Ra's Al Ghul and trained by its top members. While he wasn't like, unnecessarily cruel or anything, he wasn't merciful either.

This transfers post-train fall as him coming off as no-nonsense and unforgiving. He's not fond of the idea of giving people second chances, and is skeptical of the idea. He's disgusted by incompetency and views it as an unforgivable offense, especially if he thinks that the person should know better, although he's not sure why. Some egocentrism for the soul.

He doesn't like being touched by anyone who isn't family, and gets irritated when anyone grabs him or holds onto him for extended amounts of time. Dash has gotten hit so many times. With Jack Fenton's tendency for abrupt physical affection, it doesn't make it any better. I'd argue it'd make it worse because Danny doesn't want to be touched more often than not.

------------------

Danyal had a red scarf in the League that he wore on his last mission, it came off before he fell off and caught itself on the roof. Damian still has it and took it with him to Wayne Manor. He's got it locked in his room and takes it out when he's alone and missing Danny the most. One time he forgot to put it away before leaving his room, and Dick was visiting the manor for something and found it. Damian found him holding it and freaked out.

Dick could only say "I've never seen you wear this, Damian, this is really pretty--" before Damian shoved him to the floor and stole it out of his hands, before screaming at him; "Don't touch this! You don't ever touch this! This is mine! You hear me!?"

It caused such a commotion that the rest of the family present came to see what the fuss was about, and Damian kicked them all out of his room. Dick is the one brother Damian's the closest with, so the fact he reacted so strongly shocked them all.

This is likely what leads to the "Danyal" conversation.

[greenerteacups]

What do you think as Hermione's career would be post battle of Hogwarts? To me her being minister for magic really doesn't make sense. She does not have patience or tact to wade through murky waters of politics 😭😭

So hard to say! The Trio are so, so young when we leave them, I find it almost impossible to project their futures farther than a few years out. The job that suited me at 17 would be radically unsuited to me now. That's why of all the Trio, Ron's ending strikes me as the most realistic — he jumps straight into the save-the-world business again, burns out, realizes he's actually Done The Fuck Enough, Thanks, and pivots into a low-stress career where he gets to see his family a lot. Feels accurate! The others are weirder to me because they do seem to just... pick a lane and stay there.

With Hermione, you could spin her a couple ways. You could say that she leans into her bookish side and does research or teaching, which is not my preference for a couple reasons (namely, I don't think Hermione would like academia as a profession; she finds her classwork interesting and enjoys intellectual validation, but she'd be stifled and wasted in a DPhil program, and she'd be infuriated by the administrative politicking of your average higher-ed faculty). You could say that she gets disaffected with politics and ends up as a barrister or a lobbyist of some kind, but if anything that requires more political finesse, because you don't actually have institutional power, you're just handling the people who make decisions and trying to persuade them of your goals. This is not Hermione's preferred method of influence. She's not even particularly good at persuasion, she just happens to be smart enough (and right often enough) that people take her ideas seriously.

Or you could say her brashness fades with the years into a softened flavor of tell-you-like-it-is honesty, which some politicians actually do successfully trade on; as we see in British politics today, you don't have to be all that charming or clever to get ahead, you just need to be really driven and well-connected (which Hermione completely is; she fought shoulder-to-shoulder with the first postwar Minister and her bestie, the Literal Messiah, runs the Auror Office.) But I don't know if Hermione especially wants to be Minister, after the war. She's just watched years of horrendous bureaucratic incompetence plunge the country into a violent civil conflict. She's had not one, but two Ministers of Magic try to bully or shame her friends into complicity with fascism. Her view of government is... likely extremely dark.

But Hermione also isn't the kind of person who sees her life as a quest for happiness. Babygirl has a savior complex that makes Harry look selfish. (She basically kills her parents — yeah, obliviating is a form of murder, #changemymind — "for their own good," and justifies every batshit, vindictive, mean-spirited move she ever pulls on the grounds that it "helps" one of her friends.) She is a mean, lean, dragon-slaying machine, and she needs a dragon. After Voldemort, the Ministry is the no. 1 threat to muggle-borns and non-wizarding Beings. As a war heroine with basically infinite political capital, I'd be surprised if she didn't try to do something there. That said, Hermione is so vivacious and dynamic that she could potentially grow in a hundred different directions; it's possible that all of this, while true of her at 18, becomes completely inaccurate by 22. That's why I'm not too fussed about any particular fanon interpretation.

[kyouka-supremacy]

Well.

[starstruck-sillies]

Honestly this was refreshing to see, a lot of people who reblog typically don't even try to listen to what we're trying to get at, but I can definitely tell that you put a lot of genuine thought and actually listened, I appreciate that.

I am aware that there are many that do try to keep to themselves, and those people are (mostly) fine to me, but there are an awful lot I've seen saying a lot of...strange things. Some say that "Because some endos experience trauma they belong in CDD spaces" (Yes, that's an actual thing I've heard) And I'm definitely not trying to say their experiences are invalid, I'm just skeptical about how similar they are to us, and I'm not entirely convinced that they're actually systems like we are. If they say they are multiple people, that's fine by me, I just feel like they try awfully hard to seem like us at times, which irks me. I do see quite a few endos trying to claim that they are "so similar to us", maybe we just found different sides of it I suppose? Another thing I forgot to mention here is that there's a lot of anti-traumagen rhetoric prevalent in endo spaces. I highly doubt this is completely intentional, and I don't think that many actually realize they have this belief, but I have seen many that seem to have this idea ingrained in them that they're better than us, simply from being formed from means other than trauma, and while I think most of them are completely unaware of it, I can tell that a concerning amount of them do have this kind of rhetoric oozing from their posts. It's part of the reason that I stay away from mixed-origin and pro-endo spaces, I feel unwelcome and judged every time I try to go into these spaces.

Personally, I can't stand being in any mixed-origin spaces, though if they work for you and you feel safer there that's completely valid, and I'm glad it's worked out for you.

And I do agree that there's too much focus on alters in CDD spaces, there's so much more to these disorders than alters, and it's frustrating to see that people only ever talk about that part of it. It makes it harder for us to open up about the other parts of it, and it's extremely unhelpful.

I don't think I'll be changing my stance anytime soon, but this did put some things into perspective, and I think you taught me some things. I would be interested in hearing from endos, I haven't heard much from them, and I feel like I keep finding the bad ones, it's hard for me to find any that are decent. I still do pretty firmly believe that there needs to be more separation between traumagenic and endogenic, though I do agree that having some shared spaces would be a good idea, just that there should be more distinction between them.

(Sorry that I didn't respond to all of your points, I'm tired lmao, plus there are some I need to think on)

-Kaz

Keep seeing posts of pro-endos who used to be anti-endo talking about "Ugh, anti-endo spaces are so toxic" which is not necessarily bad, there are bad anti-endo spaces out there and people are allowed to vent about how those spaces hurt them

I do have a problem when they use that as an excuse to call us all toxic and cruel. I've seen many saying things like "Anti endos are so horrible, I'm so glad I'm not one of those monsters anymore"

You need to understand we aren't the monsters you make us out to be. We're traumatized people, trying our hardest to survive with something debilitating, who can't help but see endos as mocking, whether they truly are or not. We can't help but see endos as invading our spaces.

We didn't get to have safe spaces most of the time. We didn't get to be around people who cared about us and understood us. Even those of us that did have a safe space had it poisoned by trauma elsewhere. We spent our childhoods afraid, isolated, and so agonizingly alone, feeling like we were better off dead, that we were freaks, that we were the only ones in the world going through this. This community we made for ourselves was one we had to fight through years of hell to get.

So when random people come over trying to insist that they're "just like us" and demanding to be let in, despite having only one or two things in common that we couldn't even trust they truly had, of course we'll be fucking defensive. In our eyes, you're trying to take the safe spaces we fought tooth and nail for away from us, whether you truly are or not. In our eyes you're people who know nothing about us or what we went through, and continue to go through, trying to barge into our havens and bloat it with bullshit, whether that's what you're trying to do or not.

We've been hurt so many times, by so many people, for so long. Why the fuck would we take a chance on people that are so suspect? You claim to have alters just like us, yet without any of the other symptoms of our disorders. You claim to be systems, yet without being caused by the immense trauma we had to suffer through. Hell, some of you claim that you made your alters for fun, just because you can.

Of course we're wary and defensive. We don't want to even risk losing the spaces we worked so damn hard to get.

If you've had a bad experience with anti-endo spaces, and are pro-endo now because of it, that's fine by me and I understand completely. But that doesn't make us all villians. That doesn't make us all evil monsters.

And besides, many of us have been hurt by pro-endo/mixed origin spaces too. We've seen people have horrible experiences with them. (Let's not forget endos started as natural multiples, who were notoriously shitty, cruel, and discriminatory toward any and all traumagens, and that a lot of that same rhetoric is still rampant in the community, AND that the community at large has basically just decided to pretend that never happened.

-Kaz