#we all kind of knew it was coming
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One of my favorite coworkers retired today and my weekends are going to suck now
#we all kind of knew it was coming#she's been calling in a lot and she's not been doing well#and she said she was just kind of looking ahead to the future and just dreading coming in every weekend#(she only worked weekends)#and she can afford to retire so she decided now's the time#and you know what. she's valid and correct and i can't blame her#but weeeehhhhhhhh :c
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listen there really was just something about how in the book, snowâs 3-page descent from hesitant lover boy to deluded mfer happens entirely in his mind. lucy gray gives him no indication whatsoever that she suspects him, that sheâs going to leave or betray him. heâs just sitting quietly in the cabin waiting for her to return when that seed of calculated suspicion, which he has needed to survive the capitol, takes a hold of him and chokes the life out of any goodness left inside him. it really drives home your terror as a reader that âoh my god did he kill her? did she escape? what happened to her? why would he even think that?â in a way that when the movie had to adjust for visualization it lost some of that holy shit this guy has lost it emphasis.
#seeing some discourse and im not saying lucy grey didnt know#im saying she never dropped the kind of hints that she knew like she did in the movie#or if she did snow isnt worried about them until he very suddenly is consumed by them#snow is not concerned about whether or not she believed him. of course she did! hes snow!#but then shes goneâŚ. for a whileâŚâŚ#and its the sudden immediate drastic unravelling that comes across so clearly in the book#that i knew wouldnât translate to screen yet still cant help but miss#the hunger games#coriolanus snow#tbosas#lucy gray baird#not a crime or anything just a note that i cannot stop thinking about#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#this is all from memory of reading it quite a while ago. so maybe 3 pages is an exaggeration#but i remember it happening VERY quickly and without much external cause#like we as the reader have no indication as to whether shes nearby or not.#snow has no idea either. he just SUSPECTS. and his suspicion breeds the hatred that has been bubbling inside him all this time#he hates how she undoes him. he hates that he WOULD run away with her if shed let him keep his secrets#and he HATES more than anything that she makes him WANT to tell his secrets#he wants to be vulnerable and reveal the ugly nasty parts about himself and still be loved#but he does not let himself and it is everyoneâs downfall#he chooses cruelty bc it is easy and familiar and makes him feel more powerful than the vulnerable give and take that real love requires
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#my little brother is engaged :/#donât know if any of you remember me posting about the whole situation like 8 months ago but i feel soo weird#and sad because i want to b happy for him but heâs six yrs older than her and sheâs 19..#or i guess twenty now maybe whatever i feel so aggh. and he moved to a different country so i just feel like iâm never gonna see him again#like i knew this was coming theyâre both super religious so i was like yeah theyâre going to want to get married and have kids fast but.#it just feels crazy. i know thatâs selfish but i have such a bad gut feeling about it that i canât shake#but i canât do anything about it so. idk. i just feel so lonely when things like this happen because i don't have anyone outside of the#family bubble to talk to about it. and obviously everyone else is like super happy for them. and it's not that i don't like her! i just#don't really? know her? at all which feels weird because we are a very close sibling group and i feel like i know & get on with my other#siblings' partners. i think it's partly like i just don't ever hang around people who are under twenty so she feels really young to me#which isn't her fault obviously but. do feel kind of scared for her getting married at twenty so she can start having babies.... idk idk#and obviously on top of that it's my younger brother so it does feel a little salt in the wound that he's moving on with his life and i am#counting it a win these days if i don't want to kms every three minutes#god it just sucks lol and i can't talk about it 2 anyone so i am venting here
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I don't know much about the comics, but I have heard that Wanda and Ghost Agatha walk the road together and Agatha gets her physical form back, so even though things are a little different in this universe, I really think something like that would be a perfect tv series. Marvel, if you're listening.
#that would kind of be a perfect season 4 of the wandavision and friends series#next season is whatever billy and ghost agatha are going to do next looking for tommy#and then some movie where wanda is resurected#because i feel like that would be a movie#and then a series for agatha and wanda#unfortunately even if marvel did do this it wouldn't happen for several years#i hate how long it takes for anything to happen now#can we speed up this process?#can it not take three years between everything?#agatha all along#agatha all along spoilers#i will say one thing about these shows being based on comics is that I kind of knew ghost agatha was coming#so i wasn't totally caught off guard
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WELL!
#we all knew it was coming#but it doesnât make the manner of his goodbye any less kind of terrible#not really a chance to go out with dignity#daniel ricciardo#vcarb#vcarb when i catch you vcarb#formula 1#f1
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i wrote this as a joke because I wanted to strangle a guy watching tiktoks without headphones on the bus, but im genuinely disturbed that we've gotten to a point where convenience comes first. and it depresses me even more that its used to justify and monetize greed
#like we have so many ways of doing things that could help us in the long run but because we're told it requires more work we just cant#its too resource intensive. or maybe its too much to maintain. we have to overlook benefits so money can go into more important things#we teach each other to do things a certain way so it works for everyone but who was it convenient for first? what abt who it might hurt?#i have to wonder if the rules our current system uses is worth listening to or following if it doesnt have our best interests in mind. u an#me and the ppl around us.. would we be better off if i ate my meals knowing the person who grew it wanted to feed others the way they could#feed themselves? and that isnt to say we're going to be happy doing it but i guess satisfied that its helping someone instead of quietly#accepting that itll eventually go in the dumpster behind a grocery store because it stopped looking appetizing or it wasnt on sale anymore#what about building homes so we can shelter each other? what if we were satisfied with what we did because we knew it would be paid back#with kindness? isnt that what we evolved to do?? heal each others bones and tell stories and help each other??#why dont houses come with solar panels or generators unless we find a way to make people pay to use the sun? why is our pooled money used#to fund genocides instead of education and hospitals? whose interests and convenience came first when we started this??#i wont pretend to know the answer because i dont. but we all know we're miserable and im sorry to say that i cant see myself fighting#for a world that wont fight for me too. why do we work if we cant live from it?? why did they stop us from plucking more teeth from our#bosses until they could build more walls around themselves and then go back to underpaying us??#im so tired. i cant even imagine making it to age 70#yapping#vent
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I find it fascinating to witness the straight audience of any media not being able to pick up what the makers of the movie/show puts down.
Itâs like when people reacted to the âYou wear fine things wellâ scene in Our Flag Means Death with âaw, theyâre such good friendsâ whereas the queer audience went âomg, this is happeningâ. We all had access to the same scene, weâd all watched the build up to that scene but the straight audience wrongly read it as friends/straight whereas the queer audience had suspected they were building up to a romance but this was the confirmation. Even the creator of the show was baffled that people were surprised that Ed and Stede fell in love. Because he thought they had made it obvious.
And as I said, we, the queer audience picked up on it. And I feel like the same thing is happening with Ted Lasso. Do I know that Ted and Trent will get together? No, I am unfortunately not a writer on Ted Lasso. But you canât deny that there are clues pointing to it. But the straight audience barely pick up the fact that Ted and Trent like each other, be that in a platonic way or romantic way. Iâve seen several reactions to the last episode of season 2 and ONE of them included the scene where Ted reacts to Trent not being in the press room. All of them severely cut down the scene in the parking lot. One of the scenes most of us Ted/Trent truthers point to as a huge piece of evidence for it going canon. The parallel of them meeting in an empty parking lot, just like Ted and his ex-wife and Roy and Keeley. But because Ted and Trent are both men it couldnât possibly mean anything. And Ted has an ex-wife and a kid so he canât possibly be into men, as if there is no such thing as being bisexual. âBut Iâm pretty sure Trent has a family, he has a kid right?â So? He could be divorced, we also have no idea if his daughter has another dad or a mum. And the same thing applies to him, it doesnât mean he canât be into men (take also into account all of James Lanceâs interviews, and his choice of shirt in one of them, friend of Dorothy anyone? He's the captain of this ship, we're just along for the ride tbh.)
Then we have the wonderful âIâm so not homophobic, in fact, you are homophobic because you think Ted is gay just because he likes musicals and has âfeminineâ traitsâ um no⌠itâs the fact that he kind of acts in a way that an ally wouldn't. Yeah, he called himself an ally in that one episode. But every single person who is now out as queer who at one point considered themselves an ally because "Iâm not one of them but I sure think they're neat" raise a hand đď¸ (been there, done that. Was very into queer things before I realised I myself am one of them). What it always comes down to is "it's pandering", "it's tokenism" (having the main character on the show be queer wouldn't be fucking tokenism), "not everything has to be gay", "why can't men just be friends, there is a severe lack of male friendships on tv". And like the last one makes me go??? There are a MILLION friendships between men on TV. There are even multiple friendships between men in Ted Lasso. Beard and Ted, Ted and Higgins, Ted and Roy, the himbos and so on. Having Ted and Trent become a couple wouldn't really change anything because there are still friendships between men. They also claim that Ted is needed as the "straight without toxic masculinity" representation. As if Beard isn't right there. The man who has no problem going to an immersive show about the menstrual cycle. Has no problem with shrieking when he's surprised and so on.
I also like that if we'd get Ted and Trent together, we'd get two middle aged queer dads. Which isn't that common. It's not even super common to see people realising they're queer late in life on TV, and yet it happens every day. Because let's face it, most queer men on TV kind of look like Colin, and I don't mean that as a bad thing. And I'm looking forward to his storyline. But it's also nice seeing middle aged or old people finding themselves and being allowed to be who they are (see Ed and Stede from OFMD). Also would enjoy seeing people lose their minds when they realise they've been fooled this entire time. It'll be like Black Sails all over again.
I do not have any doubts about the fact that, had Trent or Ted been a woman and they saw Trent give up his career because of Ted's influence, they sure as hell wouldn't protest people thinking they'd become a couple. But because it's two men it's just delusional for some reason (homophobia).
What I'm saying is, it's clear that the straight audience has a hard time picking up subtext and clues that the makers are planting. Because they've never had to do that. Because they are always clearly represented. They don't have to look for minor side characters and hope that they might be queer. Because the main character is straight and most of the supporting cast too. When you've grown up with a lack of representation or with representation that is meant to be subtext, you'll learn to pick up on it. And you do look at media differently. I just wish that the straight audience could listen to us for once, without getting defensive and dancing around the fact that they are uncomfortable relating to a character that turned out to be queer.
#tedependent#ted lasso#trent crimm#there are so many times where I'm watching something and I go... hold on that is... is that a queer character... yes it must be#and then they do something small that confirms it and I'm like I fucking knew it!#I have 0 gaydar in real life but when it comes to media I tend to pick up on it#I wish that all straight people would learn about the way queer people have been represented throughout history#so that they might be able to understand why we have to look for subtext even today#hell we got ''representation'' in star wars and beauty and the beast and it was blink and you'll miss it#and they wonder why we have to make everything gay??#because we want to be represented in a show that isn't strictly about being queer#yes it's nice with a ''everyone is queer'' kind of show#but it's also nice to be seen in a mainstream show that is loved by not just a queer audience but also a straight audience#nicole watches stuff
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when the slowburn makes the ship extra cute~~~
#kimikawaii this week for sure!!!!!! (has been saying that since july)#ik the nghy payoff will be â¨sweet⨠but itâs kinda funny how hw are slowburning nagisaâs role in the series as a whole#mans has a grand total of 3 songs to date and only 1 has a cv ver#place your bets what do you think will come first? nghy duet or ariken duet#t h o u g h. ariken is also kind of a slowburn but we all knew theyâd get together since ijiwaru release (shoutout to the og miku ver)#some say that ariken is still not canon in the novels to this very day#canât believe we got arisaâs future career aspirations reveal before ariken canon in the novels smh#but i digress!!!!!!!!!!!! nagisa needs more action and attention!!!!!!#he did have kind of a âthe bus came backâ moment with the izumo collab but we never saw his face again after that#(full cast merch doesnt count bc p. much everyoneâs included in them except for the school nurse and kako)#so. all im saying is: slowburn nghy by all means. just dont slowburn nagisaâs character arc aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#now that mona mania has cooled off (to a degree) and chizusweep has mellowed out (somewhat) itâs shiranamiâs time to shine!!!!!!!!#y. yeah. ik itâs harder to market him bc heâs a literal average (albeit handsome) joe but thatâs part of his charm!!!!!#i mean!!!!! he can cook!!!!! he stans ft4!!!!! heâs devoted to the girl he loves!!!!!! heâs a dreamboat!!!! what more could you ask for?#but. i do have to say that nghy developments have been kinda awkwardly handled as a whole⌠esp with heroine ikusei#i think nagisa shouldâve been introduced in heroiku or something⌠since he was planned from the start of hiyoriâs developmentâŚ#maybe they were trying to pull a â2nd love winsâ kinda parallel with kthn? but the ascana retcon made everything awkward huhâŚ#i think it couldâve worked out in the mv-verse. like if theyâd placed heroika+sukiuso after the fight+make up in herotaru#so the timeline would go smoothly from heroiku -> herotaru -> heroika#with hiyo realising that sheâd be better off focusing on work and track after the asuka debacle + chizu fight#like a âforget romance!!! i gotta work hard and run hard!!! omg wait nagisa wdym you love me???â kinda thing#but the [redacted] anime p much cut + pasted the asuka arc with the nagisa visit and. hm.#is this just an excuse to blame the clumsy handling of the nghy arc on the [redacted] anime? m⌠maybeâŚ?#but it all still couldâve kinda worked out if theyâd shifted the timelines around a little. yâknow. since sukiuso mv has nagisa visit in oct#idk i think having hiyo learn how to doll herself up from lxl for her first crush (asuka)#and then using what she learned to yassify herself to meet up with nagisa wouldâve been neater?#like a âhey look nagisa :) i applied what i learned from my pals :)â kinda thing#or maybe chizu and juri couldâve helped her with the nagisa dressup scene post-herotaru fight⌠but i digress!!!!!!#hmmmmmmmmmm⌠well. this has gone way off topic⌠anyways nghy canon and cute thatâs all byeeee#the dude from gamushara
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Man I have developed the biggest NEED for Connor's voice but don't get me wrong because it is in the least thirsty way possible.
His voice has such a low and calm tone -most of the time anyway-
I swear to you I put ac 3 gameplays videos just to hear him and get through the day because it soothes me *cries*
#like can we get noah watts to do like those âyou have worked hard for todayâ kind of audios please#god I hope this doesn't come off as weird#I knew the real ones will get what I mean lol#sometimes all a girl needs is some comfort words from her favourite assassin character#this man istg#ratonhnhakĂŠ:ton#connor kenway#ac 3#assassin's creed
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#thinking of dinosaurs and troodontids were my favorite dinosaurs as a child#when younger i had a real full troodontid tooth fossil that meant a lot to me#for a time we lived within a few kilometers of hadrosaur sites and troodontid sites#while wider general area had many sites of recovery for the big celebrities like tyrannosaur and multiple dromaeosaurs#at that time troodontids were kinda infamous for i think the depiction in some childrens field guides and dino books#which depicted like a fantasy speculative humanoid troodontid based on 1980s model at Canadian Museum of Nature in ottawa#anyway would visit a small local paleo center a lot and woman in her 70s or 80s ran the counter of their center and rock shop#one day she asked me what my fave dino was and i said troodon so she pulled out the tooth and just gifted it to me#in little black case size of ring box with padding and transparent plastic viewing cover kinda like laminate for displaying a trading card#tooth got stolen from out my vehicle while giving some people a ride while at university before i got too poor for tuition#later during first year of pandemic owner of my storage unit died and new property owners threw away everything i ever owned#i was homeless anyway lost job due to early pandemic closures and had to allocate any money to insulin and other prescrip meds#but wouldve found a way to save my things if the new owners had contacted me#they threw out photoalbums y backpacking gear y books y musical instruments y clothes y artwork y camera y all family keepsakes#and all childhood treasures like souvenirs and gifts and school awards and writing portfolios and all the little memories#which i was always sentimental about as child#from earliest age my room looked like a natural history museum with plants and maps and library of field guides#and rocks and field trip keepsakes and all kinds of little animal figurines and mother had painted room in forest greens and browns#to feel like a forest and among the succulent plants and a globe sat the troodon tooth#parents passed when i was a child#never near any family and were always moving never got to settle into proper stable place then father passed after long sad illness#and mother put in so much effort but she passed few years later and i could not take care of myself or my remaining material possessions#and so im still quite hurt having nothing whatsoever remaining of my childhood or school friends or mother or life generally#and when trying to process grief my thoughts often come back to the troodontid tooth as a focal point a distillation of what was lost#even when young i knew it was advised not to become too connected to material physical possessions#but still there are some small little trinkets in our lives that seem to hold so much meaning and i tortured myself for losing that tooth#thinking about troodon reminds me of childhood
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frickin shite that was the worst small group I've ever been to in my life
#the eisegesis made me want to rattle out of my bones in frustration#got corrected for trying to cross-reference because ''we only stick to our one passage'' and nearly fucking cried about it#I PHYSICALLY CANNOT NOT CROSS-REFERENCE SCRIPTURE#not only is it a shitty hermeneutical process but it's also just Not How My Brain Works!!#y'all have seen me crossreference on this blog it isn't just the Bible! I can't Not crossreference things to save my life#and I basically got (admittedly she was trying to be kind about it) corrected in front of the entire group of 20somethings#and the couple that leads it are so PARTICULAR and nitpicky and it has to be done their way or you're gonna get corrected#my first introduction to her was her coming up to me while I was working the sound booth and telling me about something#wrong with my production setup that I KNEW ABOUT and WAS AND STILL AM NOT ABLE TO CHANGE#(our camera for livestreams doesn't have a high enough mount and I don't have space to extend it higher so we catch the tops#of people's heads in the camera shot)#and the girl I went bc I want to get to know her better WASNT EVEN THERE#I spent the entire time trying not to cry or look at anyone#I need to find a different small group... sorry all the kids my age were nice but I can't handle the structure or leaders#Lu rambles#adulthood woes
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âHe'd deceived her, had lied to her. This man who she'd believed held no secrets between them. She didn't know why it made her want to shred everything within sight.â
â cause um⌠as you just said Miss Manon YOU CARE (& itâs even giving Chaolaena vibes in the I CARE way)⌠so like all Iâm saying is you love him duh?
#Chapter 40#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#no spoilers please#Manon Blackbeak#Dorian Havilliard#first read#read with me#read along#more quotes notes reacts and spoilers in tags and not course post for chapter#Blueblood and Yellowlegs and Blackbeak alike.' And she would bear the weight of what she'd created what she'd trained forever.#I want to bring them all home. Before it is too late before they become something unworthy of a homeland.#So what are you going to do? Asterin asked softly but not weakly.#the fact Asterin is described as speaking softly but not weakly#The answer did not lie in picking one over the other Crochan over Ironteeth. It never had.#He'd known and hadn't told her. Kaltain had vanished into the night air and then Dorian had shifted. Into a beautiful proud raven.#our beautiful proud bluebell eyed definetly not bored Raven boy bb prince king lovey#knew there was nothing kind nothing warm on her face. A witch's face. Blackbeak's face.#but your not a witch manon#His eyes glowed like blue fire. â intrigue normally they say that for Aelin#My road leads to Morath. It always has. How can you have looked at Kaltain and not seen what awaits you?#I love the full circle of Kaltain#We will lose this war if I do not go he snapped. How do you not care about that? â that responsibility and weight again#oh great no itâs not gonna be one of them both Aelin and Dorian will want to self sacrifice and fight over who gets to#thank the Wyrd for Manon and Rowan to stop them and be protection squad so no more Romeo Julietâs#I CARE â it doesnât make you weak â he knew sheâd care â the full circle#I care if we lose this war I care if I fail2rally the Crochans I care if u go in2Morath&do not return as something worth living.#itâs giving Zoyalai; my beautiful ruthless Zoya Id hand hand you the final blow myself quote vibes#Now do you wish to tell me that caring is not such a bad thing? Well this is what comes of it.#Witchling â princeling â the literal cold shoulder
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sometimes i remember the hunger games and how nobody actually paid attention to what was in those books
#americans close your eyes and ears right now#i'm well aware that my political takes are way too spicy for you all#and i really do wish my media diet didn't contain so much us-centric shit#but alas we're all suffering here#and i could say that 'oh actually it does matter who your president is for us in the world'#but it doesn't. it really fucking doesn't. that's kind of the point.#oh i'm sorry my spicy takes are already starting#anyway it is wild that you all can understand katniss assassinating coin at the end of mockingjay#but get super upsetty that chappell roan won't support your favorite presidential candidate with her full chest#like come on none of you actually thought that her using the phrase both sides meant that she was a republican or even a centrist#that's just copium#you all knew exactly what she meant#but i guess encouraging people to think critically and get involved with their local elections and politics as well is... bad now?#also... why do you all care so much about a random pop star's opinion and whether or not she dares to criticize a government#like... she's right but i'm sure 5 years from now if she survives in the limelight her edges will be completely chipped away#by all this insane reaction#and before anyone comes for me... no i'm not saying you shouldn't vote. please fucking do.#neither am i saying you shouldn't vote strategically or encourage other people to do so#but if all your energy is spent policing people who criticize your chosen party because of their own principles#then there's something seriously wrong with your politics#and all you're signalling is that you truly do not fucking care about the issues that they care about#if anything..... you RESENT them#and then the same people bring up the parable of the 'unjust man'#or how it's never the right time to talk about gun violence in your country#harm reduction is all good and based but attacking people who are leveraging their support to push your party left#is not. it's not even fucking helpful#anyway. don't base your lives and politics around pop stars.#even if they are more based than you đ¤ˇ#i think i'm done now thank you tumblr for letting me have insane rants in my tags that hopefully no one reads#idk i just find this all depressing. i wish you all cared more about the world outside of your bubble. i wish we all did - myself included.
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#feel like my relationship with my younger brother is changed completely forever not to be dramatic lol but i am sad#we used to b very close but he has kind of. found his faith again and gone full missionary christian which like. i knew meant the dynamic#was doomed lmao but actually acknowledging it makes me sad i feel like i'm grieving for the friendship we used to have even though#it is literally a me problem i think from his perspective he doesn't think anything has changed. but i feel weird about everything#also his new gf is nineteen and he is. almost 25 and i am the only one who feels weird about it like i know she's over 18 but! idk i can't#tell if i'm being overly cautious or if my gut instinct is right. my sister & her husband have a similar age gap but they met when they wer#both over 30 so like. it didn't feel weird. and i didn't feel comfortable actually seriously talking to him about it apart from the first#time he mentioned her over facetime (he went to another country to do mission stuff & met her there) so like an idiot i've just been#making jokes about the age gap becausee like. thats always been our thing lightly bullying each other lol but he blew up at me and said#i've had nothing positive to say about her since he's been back home and that he thinks i hate her and i'm out of line for constantly#implying he's creepy for dating someone younger. idk i felt like such a freak idiot horrible person about it. it completely blindsided me#bc yes the jokes were coming from a place of idk how i feel about this situation so i'm going to rely on the humour-based communication#we have always fallen back on as a safety thing but i guess i was wrong or the dynamic shifted or something anyway it's all fucked#& everyone is just telling me i feel weird out of some?? misplaced kind of jealousy thing?? because i'm 'losing' my brother to his gf lol#which does not feel right at all he has dated so many other girls and i have never had a problem it is literally the age gap like i haven't#even met this girl i'm sure she's very nice! i just worry about her being nineteen!! jesus. and yes maybe i do feel some resentment around#a brother younger than me who seems to be able to live his life with zero difficulty whilst i'm stuck being this unemployed loser who ruins#literally ever friendship & relationship ive ever had but i think thats ok right like i can't help feeling that. i don't fucking knowwww#am i just projecting all these sad feelings about our friendship dying onto his new relationship or like. am i right to be genuinely#concerned she's six years younger than him and still a fucking teenager!!!!!! i don't know
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hate going for christian weddings sometimes because i always see the prettiest women with the ugliest men, the sermon is always some shit about wives being slaves (but not like bad slavery, mutual slavery except the husband is a benevolent master which makes it okay) and making babies for their husband, the music is always lame, the mc is always weird and obnoxious, and older women keep fucking asking me when it's gonna be my turn and never take no for an answer.
#mine#personal#brief storytime in the tags#one of my family friends got married and i was happy she was happy#her parents are like an aunt and uncle to me#i was happy to share that moment with them#we cried and laughed together#and my friends#their other daughters were on the line and looked gorgeous#it was just beautiful watching us all grow up in a way and move on to âthe nextâ together#BUT#im a pastor's kid#and my dad loves weddings#he drinks them in whenever he can now especially because they make him happy and he's had to attend a lot more funerals this year#he's been burdened a lot by how many people he's had to bury and how many hospital visits he's had to do#so i was happy to see him happy too#it just all felt so bittersweet to me#because i know how badly my parents want this for me and for themselves#there was a daddy-daughters dance at some point and i could feel my dad beaming beside me watching that#and i was a little sad about it because i was like im never gonna give you that#this could be the best thing i could ever give you and i will never give you this#i can never kneel at an altar in front of a pastor and swallow that sermon#i would never marry a man in my generation#if i married a woman you and almost the entire tent filled with people that watched me grow up would not attend#my happiest day would be another funeral for you#it was worse because im kind of a small celebrity in this community because of my parents and their siblings who are politicians#so people i barely knew kept coming up and asking me when it would be my turn and how they so looked forward to the day#and i was like i love that we're a community here and i missed the pestering of aunts since i left church#but at the same time i was glad to remember why i left#there is no freedom to be myself at all with them because all they do is project their beliefs and ideas on me because that's what children
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#would rather not have been proved right ugh#when this all started in earnest I was like ''hm I think the shower needs to be redone/remodeled''#whole back and forth with the landlord to convince him there was a problem at all and that we weren't just bad at taking showers????#my guy it is dripping. through the kitchen ceiling.#trying to seal a little crack. new shower curtain just in case.#plumber coming to tell us if it is a pipes thing we might have to go investigate up through the ceiling but it probably isn't a pipes thing#a couple floor tiles were loose so landlord said ugh fine I guess get the floor tiles resealed that will probably fix things#friends it did not#and I knew it wouldn't. on account of I KNEW where the water was coming through#ANYWAY finally had some plumber guys come look at it again bc the landlord finally decided it was a real problem#and they said oh yeah sorry we can't do anything about this the entire shower need to be remodeled#!!! yep thank you kind sirs be on your blessed way#I KNEW#but here's to hoping landlord will finally believe expert opinion instead of us silly girls who must not know how to take showers
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