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would you ever want your fic made into a podfic ? :0
a few people have already made my fics into podfics! whenever someone reaches out to ask about it my answer is pretty much: go for it, as long as there’s no money involved. i think it’s really cool when someone enjoys my writing enough to want to make something out of it just for fun—whether that’s podfics, hand-bound books, art, or their own fanfic!
#when i was living far away from my twin i kinda made crimson rivers into a podfic for her as it was coming out#except it was literally just me recording myself reading chs out loud and then sending them to her directly#it was really fun! i think i did it with one or two other fics too but now i don’t remember…#i like reading out loud but i don’t like listening to other people read to me so i don’t listen to podfics myself but i think they’re a fun#way to share stories#ask
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i finally finished reading I see you, Sundrop! by @shirajellyfish and IT'S SO GOOD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO FINISH IT RAAAAAAA
i will be gushing about it in the tags but here's a lil animation i made based on the below paragraph in chapter 6 that gave me such a strong mental image that i had to make it real :)
#fnaf#fnaf sb#fnaf dca#dca fandom#fnaf sun#i see you sundrop#doodle dump#dynamic dump#IT’S SOO GOOD Y’ALL IT’S AWESOME IT MAKES ME AHDKLSLLLFJSL#one of my favorite fics for sure. it ticks off all the boxes of things i like in a story it’s crazy#the way the animatronics are described… their funky ways of thinking…. the sheer amount of detail is just *explosion sounds*#riley leaning hard on ‘how does a good friend act?’ and growing as a person because of it IS EVERYTHING AUUUGH#I LOVE EVERY PART OF IT i will be rereading it so many times forever and ever it’s so GOOOOD!!!#thank you shira for writing and sharing such an awesome creation <3 <3 <3
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Act I ~ The Prince
A tapestry for Let No One Sleep by @azalawa-scroggs on ao3
#narumitsu#wrightworth#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#nmbb24#happy nrmt big bang!!! there are two more of these…..#but you’ll have to wait for them#fan art#aa#ace attorney#dick gumshoe#maya fey#manfred von karma#…bro is creeping…#wHEEWWWW ok took me a bazillion years to catch up with my day but HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS ON THIS ONE:#the border is intended to be read in counter clockwise direction#so: top -> left -> bottom -> right#and YES the sun and the moon are intentionally associated with the attorney's and prosecutor's badges respectively#phoenix and miles are our sun and moon throughout this story so be sure to look for that in the fic too!!#this style was very experimental for me but i wanted it to mimic the feeling of a tapestry hence me referring to it that way#i WISH this was fabric that would be sick as fuck#i will eventually share a proper breakdown of the thoughts and intentions behind everything but for now...#im gonna miss Phoenix’s cloak bc im obsessed with the design actually. wish that thing was real too#miles is my cunty little bitchboy in this wearing his thousand pound fur coat and the suitor stompy boots#if you thought that was a rug and went Oh. ...that was on purpose :^)))))#rendevok#id in alt text
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If you want to write stories and you feel like you're not managing to write the way you want to, maybe you haven’t found your medium yet.
I’m not talking about making money, I’m not talking about getting some agent or publisher to see money in your work. I’m talking about you, writing what you want to write.
I love writing. I do not love writing novels. They hurt me, physically. I have been so much happier since I stopped trying to force myself to write novels and disappeared into my flash fiction and short stories.
Maybe novels aren’t your thing either. And maybe short stories aren’t! Maybe your words want to be poured into poems, or songs, or TTRPG campaings, or drabbles, or podcasts, or anecdotes, or (screen)plays, or something else entirely!
There are so many ways to be a writer, and even more to be a storyteller. You don’t have to let yourself be bullied by a medium that does not suit your creativity.
#laura babbles#writers on tumblr#this goes for original work but for fanfic too#you can write whatever and however you want#it's yours#your words#your stories#and what's more: whatever way you choose to share/publish/spread them is equally valid#and does not change a thing about their value as your stories#writing#writeblr
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I made these diagrams to advertise a passion project of mine I've named Angel of Three. It's essentially a big DSMP rewrite/AU plot summary but with a heavy focus on themes of religion. I made this for my own sake as a sort of love letter to these characters (always characters, not CCs), but if you've ever liked the way I interpret the DSMP characters in my fanart, it would mean the world to me if you would check this story out. Okay, bye, ILY all.
#dsmp#tempo art#I know no one will read such a long document#but I'm sharing it anyway on the chance that there's one person out there who's interested in these characters in the same way I am#I don't know if I'm leaving the DSMP fandom - like these characters will always hold a special place in my heart#but this story is kind of like closure to me#and if I do keep making fanart of the DSMP characters it might secretly actually be of this story
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you know me, in the way that matters most.
#trigun#trigun anime#trigun fanart#vash#vash the stampede#wolfwood#nicholas d. wolfwood#vashwood#I JUST!!! i love the way 98 goes about invoking its overarching Themes And Questions#how the story began with ''who is vash the stampede?'' when it was a very literal#there are 60.000.000.000 outlaws w big guns on this planet and any one of them could be him#which slowly became ''but who IS he. behind the legend. behind the personas. Who Is He really?''#and then wolfwood asks. and ''i've only known you as the stampede''#but that's not true. it's not the only way he's known him. it was always more than that.#anyways do u guys ever make something that's So Important to u u are RELUCTANT TO SHARE IT LMAO#i've been holding this one very very tightly for MONTHS dhfkjghdfk
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this was published in 1976
(The Winged Dreamers by Jennifer Guttridge, published in Star Trek: The New Voyages)
#kirk/spock#spirk#star trek#star trek tos#obsessing over kirk/spock and just remembered this story#i read this expert on livejournal all the way back in ~2010#and especially ordered the book through my local comic book store because of it lmao#i needed to share it here it cannot be forgotten#the new voyages
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Danny dies every night.
So! Danny's secret Ghost Powers remained a secret for about 6 Hours.
After turning back into a Human, he had immediately gone back to his room and tried to fall asleep, pretending none of it was even real, that it was just a dream. The idea that he had just died was understandably hard to swallow, not to mention the fact he had somehow come back.
All he wanted to do was rest and figure it out later. It was a problem for Future Danny.
Except when he woke up, something was wrong.
He felt Cold, Colder than he had ever been before. It was as if he had a chunk of pure Ice stuck in his Chest, the cold spreading across every part of his body. With a start he realized that his chest wasn't moving at all, either from the beating of his heart or the breaths he was supposed to be taking.
He wasn't breathing. His heart wasn't pumping. The Ice in his chest was the feeling of his heart not pumping, still and unnaturally cold. At that realization, he felt his Heart begin beating again.
He ran downstairs, hoping to get his parents help. He didn't know what was going on exactly, but they must be able to help him right?! They were the leading experts on Undead Biology, they must know how to help him!
When he reached the kitchen, he saw his parents and Jazz huddled together at the table, crying together for some reason.
"Mom! Dad! Jazz! Somethings wrong! I don't know what happened, but last night I-"
He stopped when he saw their faces. Their cheeks were tear-streaked, eyes bloodshot, but the thing he noticed first was the grief and absolutely confusion in their eyes. They were staring at him as if they had seen a Ghost, figuratively of course, and they seemed to he trying to connect the dots in their heads.
"Danny?" Jazz asked in a shaky voice. "Is that you?"
"Jazz?" He asked in return, "What do you mean, of course it's me?"
She looked hopeful for a moment, before his mom stood up.
"No." She said, her voice held a hard edge. "It's not."
Danny almost fell over when she said that. "W-what?" He asked, "What are you talking about Mo-"
"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" She yelled. She gripped the Blaster in her hand tighter, aiming it at him. "I checked everything when we found Danny's body! He had no Pulse, no Brain Activity, and his Ecto Levels were far higher than normal! Danny is Dead! And you killed him!"
"What?!" Danny yelled in shock, "I didn't kill hi-I mean, I didn't kill me-I mean-What are you talking about!?"
This time his dad answered, getting up from the table himself. In his hand was another Blaster. "Danny's Ecto Levels could only have been that high if killed by something with a large amount of Ectoplasm, enough to leave such a mark. The Portal was open for hours last night before we found it and sealed it up, and that's when you got through isn't it!?"
His Dad leveled the Blaster to him.
"No! I'm not a Ghost, it's me! It's Danny!?" He pleaded, "Mom, I always baked you a cake on mother's day! Dad, I helped you clean up the lab the last time you blew it up! It's me!"
"Nice try." His mother said, "Die again, Ecto Scum."
That day, Danny ran away from home.
...
Ever since that day, Danny had been running as far as he could from Amity Park.
After he got out of the house, he tried to find any place he could hide as he figured everything out. His first try was Tucker, but his parents had anticipated that and beat him to the Punch. The same happened when he tried to go to Sam's, he barely escaped that situation alive(?).
At first he tried to stay in Amity, hoping he would eventually find a way to convince his parents of his true identity, so everything could go back to normal.
He abandoned that hope about a week later, when his parents got the local authorities on their side and issued a public service announcement stating he was a Murderer who killed their son, and to contact the Police if anybody saw him. The mindless Ghost they captured and presented on the Local News cemented the publics view on him.
So he ran from Amity.
The first few weeks on the Run were the worst. He wasn't used to surviving on the street, much less evading the Law Enforcement that seemed to keep finding him. He had to constantly stay on the move to keep away from the pursuit of his Parents, the Police, and the weird guys in white suits who had shown up once he passed the State Border.
His new Ghost Powers were the only thing that had let him get away most of those times. He could turn into a Full Ghost whenever he wanted, unlocking all of his powers for the time being, but also seemingly sending up a Beacon to whoever was looking for him. He found it was much easier to use their weakened versions in his Human Form.
As for his Undead-ness, he had mostly figured it out. His body was lying to him. He was Dead, but his Body was just pretending to be alive for his own sake. He didn't need to breath anymore, and his heart didn't need to pump, but they did because he felt that they needed to. He probably didn't even need to eat anymore.
The problem was that it couldn't keep it up when he was asleep. No matter what, every time he fell asleep his Body would die again, and when he woke up he would have to make it Live again.
One of the main reasons he kept getting caught recently was because well-meaning civilians would report to the Police that there was a Dead Teenager under a Bridge, or on a Park Bench, or on one memorable occasion in a Ditch. He would wake up in a Body Bag, escape, and be reported to his Pursuers.
At least his pattern of movement was untraceable so far.
Turns out, the Portal's opening had much more of an effect than his parents had anticipated. The Shockwave in the fabric of Reality when they punched a hole through it (and him), had caused dozens of Natural Portals to form across the Country, opening and closing in random places, soaking the area of Ectoplasm.
As an apparent Ghost, Danny was somehow drawn to these places. Whenever he got to one he felt rejuvenated, as if the stress of the past few days had never happened to him. He could only assume that he was Absorbing the Ectoplasm in the area to feed himself, based on a few of the things he remembered from his parents constant ramblings.
Whenever he would go to one of these places, he would find a bunch of Ghosts. Some were friendly, defying all of his expectations, while others were...less so.
They seemed to resent the fact that he was still half-alive, some simply jabbing insults at him, others straight up attacking him. It seemed that Life was a sore subject among those guys. Or maybe it was him stopping them whenever they attacked humans...that was probably more accurate.
Sometimes the Ghosts he would meet were in the middle of attacking humans to fulfill what they called their "Obsessions". He learned that all Undead, and basically all Immortal Beings, have Obsessions. They are their Sole Purpose in existence, a built in defense mechanism against insanity by giving them something to dedicate Eternity to.
He didn't know if he had an Obsession, but if he did he hoped it was easier to manage than theirs seemed to be. One of them was obsessed with attention, but got it by hypnotizing humans into adoring her. She chilled out after a while. Another loved the thrill of the Hunt, but only wanted rare game. He chased after Danny a lot in pursuit of his "One of a Kind Pelt".
He fought then off and saved people whenever he could, although sometimes it was risky. Many of them were older and more experienced than him, so he was forced to use his Ghost Form against some of them, sacrificing his hiding spot to save the people being terrorized.
He sort of enjoyed it. Whenever he helped people, saved them from danger, he felt better about his situation. As if he was making the best out of the horrible situation his life had turned into by helping as many people as he could. He always felt a bit more motivated to keep going every time he helped anybody.
Maybe that was his Obsession? Helping others? He didn't really think so, he was nowhere near altruistic enough to consider that a possibility. Maybe it was Space? He always felt that same relief when he would camp out away from the Cities. Eh, he'll probably never know.
This cycle of finding a new hiding spot, getting discovered, and running away again continued for a while. Years even.
Danny had Died at 14. He was now 17, and had been homeless for 3 years.
He hoped this next hiding spot would last a bit longer than the previous ones. This one felt different, the Ectoplasm he was wandering towards felt older than the other places he had gone. His previous hiding spots had always been the site of a recent Natural Portal, and the Ectoplasm in the atmosphere would feel Fresh and Wild.
But the Ectoplasm where he was going tasted Older, Stronger, more Set in Stone than the others had. Wherever he wad headed to next, it had been soaking in Ectoplasm for far longer than any other place he had ever been, even in Amity.
He walked up the the Sign at the side of the road, introducing the City to newcomers.
"Welcome to Gotham City" it said.
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#Danny is Dead when he sleeps#Danny is immediately found out#Nobody Knows AU#For about 6 hours#Sam and Tucker weren't there to corroborate Danny's story#Danny is Homeless#The Fentons locked up the Portal after they found out a Ghost killed their using it#The Rogues have to find more roundabout ways into the Human Realm and spread across the country#Danny still fights them and still befriends some of them#He just happens to show up at the same Portals they are exiting at the time#Wonder why that keeps Happening? (Looks at a certain grandfather clock suspiciously)#Danny actually has 2 Obsessions#His Ghost Half has a Protection Obsession but it is stifled because he spends as much time as possible in his Human Form#His Human Form has a Space Obsession which he gets to indulge whenever he camps out away from Civilization#He gets found quickly tho without humans energies around to camouflage in so he can't do it too often#Danny goes to Gotham#The Ecto there feels older and more powerful so he hopes it will keep him hidden for longer#Meanwhile with the Fentons:#They think that the Ghost who killed their son is traveling to all these portals to absorb their Ectoplasm and grow his Power#All as part of some convoluted evil scheme to take over the world or something#Meanwhile with the Batfam:#They has been a string of Murders where the bodies share the same description and then disappears a few hours after discovery#And they seem to trace a Path that is leading directly to Gotham as the next location
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Love, Dhes
Parker,
It's unfair how time with you feels so short. How the last 10 years have felt like no time at all. I like to think there are other versions of us out there, somewhere. Maybe in another timeline, another universe. I like to think we find each other no matter where we are or what we're doing. That we're together and happy and I get to love you in a dozen different lifetimes. That's what I hope, anyway. And I hope when this lifetime ends, we get to start over and do it all again. Because once just isn't enough. Not for me. Not with you.
I hope the next 10 years pass slower.
Love, Dhes
#ts4#simblr#ts4 edit#ts4 render#sims 4#myedits#sue#dhestyn#kelly#bow#stella#duder the cat#marky#jax#i'm not fucking recovering from this#critical damage has been dealt to me#GODDDDDD this edit took me so LONG.#the GOOD news is there ARE other versions of them & they DO in fact find each other in every universe !!#whether or not they are happy though. well. that's a different story#cough monster boyz. cough slaughter house.#:-)#ngl a lot of the time i was working on this edit all i could think about was how much dhes has grown as a character#like baby dhes genuinely was such a punk. wouldn't be caught DEAD writing a love letter#let alone to kelly of all people#idk i'm just proud of him. seeing him so comfortable with himself... how he's able to show that to others & not feel afraid or ashamed...#it's really sweet!!!#like ik y'all don't know a whole lot about the boys as kids (bc i'm v protective of them so i don't share a lot lol) but trust me.#dhes has come a long way.#genuinely feel like i have watched him grow & learn & change & it does. give me feelings.#n e way. that's it.
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IAN GALLAGHER + his journey with bipolar disorder
╰┈➤ “At times, being bipolar can be an all-consuming challenge, requiring a lot of stamina and even more courage, so if you’re living with this illness and functioning at all, it’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of." - Carrie Fisher
#happy world bipolar day to all my bp babies#(more thoughts at the end of the tags)#shameless#shamelessnet#shamelessedit#ian gallagher#cameron monaghan#*macygifs#bipolar disorder#hello pals how are we doin#i made this gif set in july of 2023 and never posted it because 1) i was terrified to share it and potentially see Bad Takes in the tags#and 2) because my hyperfixation was waning. and while both of those things are still mostly true (the fixation comes and goes)#i feel like it's really important to share as ian's bipolar storyline was not only so vital to his character it was a bit of representation#that isn't often given to the disorder and those (like myself) who live with it every single day#world bipolar day is a day where we can both celebrate ourselves and our resilience and also raise awareness of the reality of the disorder#which is both terrifying and beautiful at its core. this disease is not a death sentence or a sentence to an unfulfilled and miserable life#while there are challenges galore when it comes to balancing life with this disorder it IS possible to live a full and productive life#and i think it's really important to have representation of that in media - and while shameless dropped the ball on a LOT of storylines#over the years THIS is the one they really fucking nailed and i am incredibly grateful#i first started watching shameless while in the midst of a major depressive episode and i was later (finally) diagnosed during an extended#hypo/manic episode - this show and ian's storyline got me through so much and made me feel so seen and validated in my struggles#world bipolar day is also vincent van gogh's birthday (happy birthday buddy) who was posthumously diagnosed with bipolar disorder#and who experienced both depressive and hypo/manic episodes during his lifetime (and was regularly institutionalized)#it takes a lot of help and support to keep us going. it takes the support of our family and friends and *most* of all#it takes patience and kindness and understanding - which is so so so easy to give if you are willing to love and listen#so please. be willing. listen to our stories. be patient with us. show us love without conditions. support us in any way you can.#we are worth it#i promise#anyway. that's really all i wanted to say. happy world bipolar day to those who celebrate (me) and may all of us living with this disorder#go on to live happy fulfilling beautiful magical lives
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So one thing I like about Time is that he will talk about his life and journeys
He talks about it! He'll tell the boys stories and answer questions. (...when asked)
Obviously he tells his family- Malon knows everything
But he has also never held back from telling the boys stories or answering questions
I'm still always cackling over him telling them about gerudo town- he is way too proud to brag about being a mischievous gremlin
"I proved to be a greater thief than all of ganons tribe"- oh yeah. He's definitely the good influence. (That's sarcasm, Wars is the one good example for the younger ones.)
He just. He looks so smug to tell them about his experiences with the Gerudo- I love how often we see him just talking to them and answering questions about his life.
Even if it's clearly painful memories- he has still always told them
*sobs*
Obviously Time talks to Twilight the most about stuff- and everyone knows that (to where Sky went to him for questions about Time)
But the thing that get me the most is Wind.
Wind asked about... everything! Wind asked about his first journey and his life- and Time told him
The sheer transition from
"I was wondering... about your original journey"
To
"You told me about your original journey. Everything you said... the sages you described, the old traditions, the old stories- all of it! ...)
And this literally drives me insane because Time told him- Time told him everything! He told him about the sages, traditions- Time literally openly talked to Wind about his first Journey because he asked.
The Hero of Time's story had always been a tragedy- I mean... yikes. Trauma much? But I think people overlook this part of him- that he's older. All the hurt and scars are still there, but he has learned to talk about it to deal with it. And I think I know why- (Read)
Malon Malon Malon Malon!!! Jojo showed this set up for their marriage- Time was and is traumatized. But he and Malon worked to talk through things. I mean. Can you imagine keeping secrets from Malon? I don't want to. I feel like she would throw a cow at me. Anyways.
It takes a lot to work through trauma and learn to talk through it. Malon claimed him tho, so I don't think he had a choice. But seriously- she helped him work through things as family. Which led to a successful marriage for both of them, and got Time to where he can talk about these things with the boys :D
But
Time is a troll, so although he will share his insane life stories.... he will also say he fought the moon with no more context, and tell his wife that they have a descendant but not freaking tell her which one it is.
He's so insane I love it <3
Just don't forget this part of him... don't forget that rather it's sad or goofy or whatever- he will talk about his life. If someone simply asks
:)
.
Art and comic by Jojo @linkeduniverse au! :DDD
@adrift-in-thyme
#linked universe#linkeduniverse#Lu Malon#Lu time#goof#WHAT a way to be promoted to grandpa who shares crazy stories#I feel like I'm contradicting everyone here#everyone seems to incorporate him being traumatized and silent and secretive about it#and he's definitely traumatized but#I mean he even responded well to Wild holding up Majoras mask in the masks comic#he WILL talk about it#which is a good thing... sometimes. he's definitely a bad example with the Gerudo town stuff tho#'I humiliated them' could he be any more smug about that difnfigjgifjrg#anyways#I'm doing it!!! I'm posting!!#I hope it's ok to tag you trin?#let me know if not :))#and if I said anything offensive or something ever. let me know.#I love you guys :)
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I think queer stories would be better if people stopped assuming that queer representation hinges on if two characters are romantically involved at all. Like the moment you accept characters as being queer without needing romance to prove said queerness then i think we'd find ourselves with a lot more unique, nuanced, and interesting queer stories. but by limiting queerness to only romance you are stifling queer stories.
#text#queer#lgbtq+#lgbt#lgbt+#lgbtqia#lgbtqia+#you can't get mad at the idea of cookie cutter queer stories while also saying that it's 'queerbaiting' if two characters dont kiss.#this isn't just in reference to aspec identities or gender identities either#I think a character can still be valid gay representation without ever kissing someone to prove it#a bi person doesn't need to kiss both boys and girls to be valid bi rep#there are more ways to express and share queer identity that dont require a love plot to be tacked on to validate the queerness#don't relegate the queer experience to only love stories. they can be so much more than that.#romance mention
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was thinking about it this morning as i was making tea and i think there's a fundamental gap in the advice we give to writers/creators to "first and foremost create for ourselves", bc yes. in the beginning, i am almost always writing for myself. i write all the time, and im sure that artists doodle and paint all the time too. there are things i've written that will never see the light of day and are truly just for me.
and then there are things that i choose to share, because i want to share them. because i'm proud of a story, and want to put it into the world. the act of sharing it is, above all, an invitation.
its me inviting you into a corner of my mind/heart/soul, opening the window and throwing open the curtains and waving, holding up a sign that says "hi! do you like this too? let's talk about it!"
what im asking for is a connection, a conversation. a shared space. digital or otherwise. and the so-called "harm" of "ghost consumption" is not that artists will stop creating art or that writers will stop writing -- no, that's not quite how creativity works (thankfully, and sometimes unfortunately). we will always create.
we just might not be inspired to share it anymore.
#🌧 raindrops#this is broad strokes and of course it feels good for something to get lots of traction and to 'do well'#creation is a fundamental part of the human condition im afraid#but its the sharing of that creativity that builds community and connection and i dont care how much people go on and on about#the industry of business and the boom of economics and capitalism#shared space is what humanity has ALWAYS been built on bar none#back when there were no cities and we were all just wandering tribes of people hunting and gathering we still sat around a fire#we still painted cave walls and sung our stories to the stars#and those people are no less human than we are today#money and infrastructure keep you alive but art and writing and creativity gives you a REASON to stay that way
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2024 Tumblr Top 10
1. 11,390 notes - Sep 3 2024
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Created by TumblrTop10
waow 2024 is almost dead!!! gone too soon. feels like it’s been a big year for me art-wise for many reasons, BUT. i’m making 2025 bigger.... hopefully....i’ve made some art goals for next year which i won’t explain in detail but they boil down to 1) do more studies 2) tackle my weaknesses (backgrounds, dynamic poses/angles, uhhh lots of stuff i am a one trick pony right now) 3) get into drawing comics, all of which are in preparation for 4) take my story ideas more seriously and get started on one of the many graphic novels living in my head. i have one in mind i HAVE to complete in my lifetime or i will die, but firstly i’m gonna mess around with some little standalone svanhildr comics perhaps. goat fans rejoice.
anyway i wasn’t meant to ramble so i’ll just say THANK YOU for the support as always!!! i’m very flattered all of these have more than 1000 notes.....crazy. thank you. muah
#tumblrtop10#my art#looking forward to 2025 i really really REALLY REALLY want to get stuck in with my story ideas.....#my main passion project i'm more and more leaning into not even sharing i cannot lie. it's very personally made for ME to love and enjoy#and i suck at a lot of what i'd need to draw for it (humans interior backgrounds and an art style that's at least a little gritty)#GOD it's been taking over my mind so much i want to gnaw on it but it's in my head#so maybe i'll just do a first draft for me and me alone and when i'm in my 30s and maybe better at those things i can draw it finally#actually one of the characters for that features here hiii mockley!!! coming in at number 2 most popular of 2024 i'm so proud of her#her design's come a long way i'm kind of super happy with her as always <3 i love you my repressed old woman dinosaur#ALSO i'm SOOOOO excited about a character i made recently i can't wait to share her with the world#she's been a LONG time coming....my goirl.....#i will hopefully show her off in the new year#ALSO no one will see this i'm sure but thank you to my commissioners for the patience#i have now finished my break and will continue drawing
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what do you mean youre technically a detransitioner cause of terf bullshit?
it's a v long story but i detransitioned for a couple of years when i was 16/17, for multiple reasons but mostly because i fell into the blaire white/kalvin garrah chamber of "you have to be This way to be trans otherwise you're not real".
i was already Deeply insecure about myself and my 'passing' and i was led to believe that i couldn't want to wear makeup or skirts, and i couldn't choose not to have bottom surgery, and i couldn't do anything but bind for 12+ hours a day to the point that my ribcage is still misshapen. basically i thought that if i wasn't suffering enough doing 'feminine' things, i couldn't really be trans, so i should just go back to being a girl and suck it up.
the terf bullshit is because i'd seen a lot of terfs/detransitioners talking about the 'dangers' of testosterone and how it would turn me into a horrible ugly evil monster and how there was nothing worse than wanting to be a man. which combined with 'you need to fully medically transition to be valid at all' creates some very dangerous and upsetting feelings to cope with.
it also came from trying really hard to put myself in a little box before i realised that my sexuality/gender are very fluid and it's FINE for me not to have a label and just do whatever i want. when i was 19 or so i went back to using they/them (and eventually he/him) and changed my name again because even though i like doing 'feminine' things, i don't want to be seen as a woman.
tldr: i was conditioned by transphobic/terf rhetorics to think that i was being trans the 'wrong' way so i couldn't be trans at all, so i believed i must actually be a girl if i still wanted to do 'feminine' things. nowadays i am a transmasc who does feminine things because i don't give two shits about what any transmed prick thinks of me anymore.
#ramble#ok to reblog btw i'm fine with this being shared#this was meant to be a short version but this is just the whole story whoops#sorry i realised the way i phrased it sounded like i'm the detrans you see in the news#i'm Technically a detransitioner because a lot of detrans stats are people who go on to RETRANSITION#because detransition is often because of social stigma and not because you realised you weren't trans#so anyway. terfs are cancer and if you don't think their bs is harming children you're wrong#i know it's easy to say 'you should've used your brain and realised those people were wrong'#but like. when you're 16 you're SO impressionable. even if you think you aren't#especially when you're watching people who have been transitioning longer than you and you assume they know everything#i was in my mid-late teens when 'transtrender' videos were MASSIVE and i believed it!!! and i was Not nice about those people#all they made me believe was that being trans couldn't be colourful and comfy and fun. it just had to be Pain#i hope everyone who contributed to the 'you need to be this way to be trans' mindset knows how much hurt they've caused#nowadays i don't care. go and be stargender. we have actual problems to deal with not debates about neopronouns#anyway this was long. that's the story
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