#was no one going to tell me i wrote read the anime instead of read the manga

[imanes]

hey imane, this is such a dumb question but inshallah you will not hate me for it: how do you not want to die when you go to the gym.... i want to improve my health and my parents doomed me to live in the north where the weather is terrible for most of the year, so the gym feels like my best option, but exercise itself is so painful and sweaty and i have never felt this "high" that people talk about getting from exercise! i would appreciate any advice at all! also i finally caught up on demon slayer because of you, it was so good (should i read the manga?) ☆

naaur it's not a dumb question on the contrary!! I've been struggling with keeping up with going to the gym or just exercising in general because it feels like a task to be done rather than something that gives me a high or something so i totally feel you. i do like moving around and feeling like i'm getting stronger (i mostly lift weight + light cardio) but idk about that mental boost people talk about either lmao.

i can only speak from my perspective so my goal at the moment isn't even to do the most at the gym and get me into shape in a month or something, I'm literally just trying to build the habit of going to the gym. heading there is a struggle too so i have to put myself in automatic mode and go no question asked. i also tell my friend to hold me accountable so i send them a pic where i get there otherwise I've given them license to punch me in the arm lmao.

another thing that helped me is switching gyms to go to one that is bright, well lit, spacious, and never overcrowded. i used to go to a cheaper one and i was pretty regular but i just haaaaated the place so much it was dank dark musty crusty ew ew ew.

having an idea of the workout you wanna do is also important once you get there so you can just go through your workout like a checklist and then head out after a good stretch! I'm getting back into the swing of things so I'm watching beginner videos from naomi kong on youtube, she really doesn't overdo it and outside of my own self-mandated light cardio warm-up (cycling) and finisher (inclined walk on the treadmill) it really didn't break a sweat.

so yeah to build the habit of just doing it, i am actually going everyday until i feel like i can trust myself with doing it every other day. mind you i don't do a "real" workout every day, i actually did a full body three days ago, just light cardio for 30 minutes yesterday to get my limbs moving and my blood pumping, and today was leg day. I'm gonna go tomorrow for a swim i think just to switch up the way i do my cardio and then on Monday it's gonna be upper body day and I'll probably follow another naomi kong beginner's guide to the gym.

so my tips for consistency and learning to like going to the gym:

go as many times as possible during the week just to make you used to going there

don't do big workouts!! your body doesn't need to go into failure every time. my legs used to shake like i was a newborn fawn bc i was following my friend's workout routine and it was not sustainable mentally for me lol. i just do my reps with lower weights than i used to just to get my body used to the movements and to make my mind disassociate "working out" with "sweating and suffering". it's like pavlov lol positive reinforcement is key

switch up your workouts so that it feels fresh! what i did today for leg day isn't what I'm gonna be doing for my next leg day for example bc i get bored easily

speaking of getting bored easily usually i either watch a bunch of youtube videos, listen to podcasts, read a book on my phone, or switch to an audiobook when my hands are busy because otherwise my mind wanders and i want to leave from being bored out of my mind. however today i did have a lot on my mind so i ended up listening to newjeans songs they have the perfect beat for working out

if your gym offers collective classes try one out! suffering together makes the pain easier to bear <3 that used to be what got me through english boxing classes years ago when i used to go... my objective is actually to go back to boxing classes (this time muay thai i think) by the end of the year and then the gym every other day or something for weight lifting, swimming, or a class of pilates or dance or smt that sounds fun

ok that was a really long answer lmao i'm also at the beginning of a journey that i hope will be consistent and sustainable!! i hope we can motivate each other out as northern country dwellers who have to contend with the wind the rain and the snow <3 also yaaaaay I'm so happy you watched demon slayer! and YES read the manga, the next arc is chill and cute but what follows... if you don't binge it all til the end i'd be surprised but also that'd mean you're much stronger than me which is a good thing if you can apply it to going to the gym as well akjfdklgj anyway good luck keep me updated babe insha'Allah we can do it!!

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Nimona headcanons I wrote instead of sleeping

Sometimes the boys forget that Nimona isn’t human 

Like they’re used to the shifting into animals aspect of Nimona because she does it as often as she breathes

But sometimes she’ll do some really creepy shit like make her arms longer to reach something when she’s too lazy to get up

One time they shifted just their neck to be like an owl so they could turn their head 180 degrees instead of just turning around cause that was “too boring” 

Or he’ll mimic people’s voices without realizing it 

Sometimes he’ll tell a story and suddenly he’s using Bal’s voice 

The first time she did this Bal searched the whole house cause he was convinced that Todd has snuck in

Or she’ll grow an extra arm to hold more shit and they take a moment to realize “oh yeah we adopted a little weirdo” 

They get used to it after a while and the arguments surrounding it are always funny because both the boys will complain and say “I don’t sound like that” and they have to be told “No love you do you really do” 

You know those videos of babies reacting to their parents shaving their facial hair or putting on glasses 

That’s Nimona's reaction every single time the boys change their appearance even the smallest bit they cant shave or wear their reading glasses because if they do he freaks out 

Talking some “help me Nemesis I heard bosses voice but I can’t find him” while Bal was standing right in front of them 

It was the first time he shaved his face in years and he’s never doing it again 

Mostly cause Ambrosius kept telling him he looked like a teenager and it was freaking him out 

I feel like Bal and Ambrosius are those kinds of people who will tell people about the little injuries but neglect the big ones 

Like Bal mentioned that he thinks he sprained his ankle during the fight at the institute but he won’t mention that he’s pretty sure he got a concussion 

(BECAUSE THIS MAN HEAD-BUTTED TWO PEOPLE WHEN HE HAS A METAL ARM) 

(I’m bout to wrap this man in bubble wrap and give him a helmet because wtf) 

Ambrosius will complain the whole day about the fact that he has a paper cut

But will completely neglect to inform his doctors “Oh yeah I can’t move my left arm higher than my waist without pain and I can’t see that well out of my left eye or hear that well out of my left ear do you think that’ll be a problem?” 

It isn’t until Nimona makes an off handed comment about how this super weird that the laser did basically nothing to him that he told both of them

They literally dragged him to the ER because “Who thinks those symptoms are normal Nemesis what is wrong in that pretty little head of yours!!” 

When Bal tells Nimona she’s being a bit of a hypocrite (cause who refers to an arrow as a splinter?) she turns to him and says “I know you’re not saying something Mr. Human battering ram” 

It took literally everything in Ambrosius not to break down laughing

After that she forces them to have frequent checkups with the doctor because these dorks wouldn’t go otherwise

Honestly I'm fully convinced that some people in the kingdom don't know who Nimona is and are constantly confused why they let this little weirdo follow them around 

And finally the curiosity will eat away at them and they’ll finally ask 

Sometimes the boys will give some “normal” answers like “Oh that’s Nimona” and they won’t elaborate at all

Sometimes they’ll give funnier answers like “Oh that’s a raccoon we found in the garage who turned into a person one day” “I don’t know they just showed up in our living room” and their personal best “You see her too?” 

And their favorite that they only started using a couple of years down the line “Oh that’s our kid”

[dedalvs]

Hey! I'm David Peterson, and a few years ago, I wrote a book called Create Your Own Secret Language. It's a book that introduces middle grade readers to codes, ciphers, and elementary language creation. The age range is like 10-14, but skews a little bit older, as the work gets pretty complicated pretty quick. I think 12-13 is the best age range.

Anyway, I decided to look at the Amazon page for it a bit ago, and it's rated fairly well (4.5 at the moment), but there are some 1 star reviews, and I'm always curious about those. Usually they're way off, or thought the book was going to be something different (e.g. "This book doesn't teach you a thing about computer coding!"), but every so often there's some truth in there. (Oh, one not 1 star but lower rated review said they gave it to their 2nd grader, but they found it too complicated. I appreciate a review like that, because I am not at all surprised—I think it is too complicated for a 2nd grader—and I think a review like that is much more effective than a simple 10+ age range on the book.) The first 1 star rating I came to, though, was this:

Now calling a completely mild description of a teenage girl who has a crush on another girl controversial is something I take exception to, but I don't want to pile on this person. Instead I wanted to share how this section came to be in the book.

The book is essentially divided into four parts. The first three parts deal with different ciphers or codes that become more complicated, while the last part describes elementary language creation. The first three sections are each built around a message that the reader can decode, but with language creation, the possibilities are too numerous and too complicated, so there isn't an example to decode, or anything. It would've been too difficult.

For what the messages to decode are about, though, I could do, potentially, anything, so at first I thought to tie them into a world of anthropomorphic animals (an ongoing series of battles between cats and mice), with messages that are being intercepted and decoded. My editor rejected that. Then I redid it so that each section had an individual story that had to do with some famous work of literature. My editor rejected that as well. He explained that it needed to be something that was relevant to kids of the target age range. I was kind of at a loss, for a bit, but then I thought of a story of kids sending secret messages about their uncle who eats too many onions. I shared that, my editor loved it, and I was like, all right. I can do this.

The tough part for me in coming up with mini-stories to plan these coded messages around was coming up with a reason for them to be secret. That's the whole point of a code/cipher: A message you want to be sure no one else but the intended recipient can read in case the message is intercepted. With the first one, two kids are poking gentle fun at a family member, so they want to be sure no one else can read what they're writing. For the last one, a boy is confessing to a diary, because he feels bad that he allowed his cat to escape, but no one knows he did it (he does find the cat again). For the other, I was trying to think of plausible message-sending scenarios for a preteen/teen, and I thought of how we used to write notes in, honestly, 4th and 5th grade, but I aged it up a bit, and decided to have a story about a girl writing a note to her friend because she has a crush on another girl, and wants her friend's opinion/help.

Here's where the point of sharing this comes in. As I had originally written it, the girl's note to her friend was not just telling her friend about her crush, it was also a coming out note, and she was concerned what her parents would react poorly.

Anyway, I sent that off with the rest of my draft, and I got a bunch of comments back on the whole draft (as expected), but my editor also commented on that story, in particular. Specifically, he noted that not every LGBTQ+ story has to be a coming out story, the part about potential friction between her and her parents because of it was a little heavy for the book, and, in general, not every coming out story has to be traumatic.

That was all he said, but I immediately recognized the, in hindsight, obvious truth of all three points, and I was completely embarrassed. I changed it immediately, so that the story beats are that it's a crush, she's not sure if it'll be reciprocated, and she's also very busy with school and band and feels like this will be adding even more busy-ness to her daily life as a student/teen. Then I apologized for making such a blunder. My editor was very good about it—after all, that's what drafts and editors are for—and that was a relief, but I'm still embarrassed that I didn't think of it first.

But, of course, this is not my lived experience, not being a member of the LGBTQ+ community. This is the very reason why you have sensitivity readers—to provide a vantage point you're blind to. In this case, I was very fortunate to have an editor who was thinking ahead, and I'm very grateful that he was there to catch it. That editor, by the way, is Justin Krasner.

One reason I wanted to share this, though, is that while it always is a bit of a difficult thing to speak up, because there might be a negative reaction, sometimes there is no pushback at all. Indeed, sometimes the one being called out is grateful, because we all have blindspots due to our own lived experiences. You can't live every life. For that reason, your own experience will end up being valuable to someone at some point in time for no other reason than that you lived it and they didn't. And, by the by, this is also true for the present, because the lives we've lived cause us to see what's going on right before our eyes in different lights.

Anyway, this is a story that wouldn't have come out otherwise, so I wanted to be sure to let everyone know that Justin Krasner ensured that my book was a better book. An editor's job is often silent and thankless, so on Thanksgiving, I wanted to say thank you, Justin. <3

[misc-obeyme]

I tried to resist. (I didn't try at all.)

Instead I got carried away and wrote this.

*drops the Satan cat collar smut and runs*

(Special thanks to everyone who gave me some input on this idea. I'm still rusty with writing at the moment, so I apologize if it's terrible. I'm considering writing an alternate version involving some pegging... so let me know if you wanna see that lol.)

Okay, you can read the alternate version here.

GN!MC x Satan

NSFW MDNI

Warnings: soft dom!MC, cat collar with bell and cat ears, praising, use of Tantan as a nickname (because I love it lol), lil bit of biting, penetration (reader receiving), please let me know if I've forgotten something

It might be difficult to tell from an outside perspective, but you knew that Satan was soft for you. The way he trusted you entirely with his feelings, even his anger, let you know that he was perhaps more comfortable with you than anyone else.

So it wasn't entirely a surprise when you started to pick up on some little hints of something he didn't seem to have worked up the courage to ask you directly.

You weren't sure what was happening right away. It started one day when he showed you a collection of cat collars that were for sale online. He scrolled through the pictures on his phone, finally stopping on one with a little bell.

"This one is especially cute, don't you think?" he asked.

You smiled indulgently. "Yeah it is. Are you going to get it for one of the strays in the garden?"

Satan blinked as if he was surprised by this suggestion. He looked at you and the confusion in his eyes was clear. Then you watched as a deep blush spread across his face. "R-right," he said. "Yes."

He immediately changed the subject, but you couldn't stop thinking about his reaction. Like maybe the two of you had been talking about different things.

You puzzled over this for a little while, a suspicion starting to form in the back of your mind.

Confirmation came in the form of a cosplay catalog that Levi left in the common room. The cover featured an anime character wearing cat ears and a collar.

Satan picked up the catalog and you could tell that he had known it was there. "Levi must have left this here," he said. He showed it to you. "Wh-what do you think?"

You looked at the cover. "Hmm," you said. "I like the cat ears. The collar should have a bell, though."

You watched in satisfaction as Satan's face flushed so hard and fast you thought steam might come out of his ears.

After that, you knew what you had to do.

You were careful about your purchase. You made sure it was obtained discreetly.

The collar itself was thick and black with a large silver buckle and a round silver bell. You had chosen black cat ears to match. You left them on Satan's bed with a note that said, Is this what you had in mind? MC.

And then you waited.

The next time you saw Satan was at breakfast. He sat across the table from you and met your eyes directly. He held your gaze for a moment too long before looking away. Nobody else seemed to notice and he acted completely normal the rest of the day.

You had no other indication of his reaction to your gift. For days, you waited for him to do something or say something. Was he upset? He wasn't acting angry.

And then one day you walked into your room and nearly died on the spot. As soon as you recovered, you closed the door and made sure it was locked. And that's when you remembered that everyone else was out of the house today. Was that what Satan had been waiting for?

You turned back to your bed to take in the sight of him.

There he sat, on his knees, with his hands pressed onto the bed between them. The collar was clasped perfectly around his neck, the bell and buckle shining. The cat ears were nestled in his hair, their black tufts a nice contrast to his bright blond. He was frowning, his eyes were closed, his face flushed, and he wore absolutely nothing else.

You slowly approached him, watching him as he stayed still. When you got to the edge of the bed, you stopped. You cupped his cheek, tilting his head to look up at you, even though his eyes stayed closed.

"Look at you," you said softly. "What a beautiful boy you are."

Satan's blush deepened, but he opened his eyes. You saw desire and pleasure and nervousness and embarrassment tumbling through the shades of green.

You brought up your other hand and held his face. "Don't be embarrassed. You look amazing."

The frown eased just a little. "I didn't think you would actually want to do this."

Your eyes widened in surprise. "What? Why would you think that?"

Satan looked away from you. "It doesn't… make you uncomfortable?"

You rested your hands on his shoulders and kissed his forehead. "No. It makes me horny as fuck. And I can see what it's doing to you, too."

You looked down deliberately where Satan's cock had been steadily growing as soon as you got close.

Satan buried his face in his hands, causing the bell around his neck to jingle slightly.

"No, no, no," you said softly, pulling his hands away. He opened his mouth like he was going to protest, but you cut him off with a kiss.

Satan responded to you instantly, opening his mouth for you. As your tongues entwined, you let go of one of his wrists to reach up and grab the collar. You used it to pull his head back, giving you easier access to his mouth as his hand now tugged on the edge of your shirt.

You pulled away to kiss the wrist of the hand you still held, trailing your lips down his arm and up his shoulder. He was breathing heavily as you traced your tongue along the edge of skin where the collar stopped, ringing the bell playfully with your fingers.

Satan moaned, his tugs on your shirt feeble but persistent.

You gave in, moving away from him to remove the shirt quickly, along with all the rest of your clothes. He waited patiently, mouth open, skin flushed, cock straining.

You sat beside him on the bed, putting two fingers beneath the collar to pull him toward you. He moved easily with your guidance, the bell tinkling ever so softly as you caught his swollen lips with yours again.

You ran a teasing finger along the shaft of his cock and it came away covered in pre-cum. Satan whined against your lips and the sound of it sent a shiver through your body.

You pulled away just a little bit. "Use your words, Tantan. Or would you rather meow for me?"

Satan shuddered and the bell tinkled. "Please, MC," he said, his voice low and gruff. It seemed he wasn't quite comfortable enough to meow and his eyes were closed again, his face turned slightly away.

"Look at me," you said.

Obediently, Satan opened his eyes and looked at you. He might have been frowning if he wasn't so overcome with lust in that moment. You took in the darkness of his eyes, the heat clearly visible on his skin, the expression that vacillated between need and embarrassment.

You realized you could tease him for hours if you really wanted to. You also knew that he would let you. Something about the way he was looking at you let you know that he was trusting you entirely. That he was putting himself in your hands, letting you do whatever you wanted to with him.

Certainly, part of this had been previously discussed. The two of you had an established routine, after all. But he was entrusting you with more than he normally did and you recognized that extra vulnerability.

The light of your room hit the silver of the bell around his neck. You took in the collar, the ears. Maybe next time, you could get him to meow for you.

For now, though, you wanted nothing more than to hear that bell chime with every thrust.

You leaned forward, running your fingertips down his cheek. "You're such a good boy," you said, loving the way he seemed to melt whenever you praised him.

You took hold of his collar again, this time pulling him with you as you lay back on your bed. You had considered other positions, but you wanted to see that bell as it sounded through the room.

Satan moved where you guided him, but when you let go of the collar, he no longer waited for your direction. He put his lips on your neck, his hands on your hips, and you could feel the tip of his cock pressing gently against you.

Satan hesitated, pulling up to look into your eyes. It was as though he caught himself being too eager and now he needed your confirmation.

You smirked. "Go ahead. You've earned it."

Satan didn't wait for anything else and he sank his cock into your heat. You arched as sensation filled you, your eyes fixed on the brightness of the bell around his neck.

To your great satisfaction, that bell did indeed jingle with every thrust, louder than it had from anything else. The sound mingled with your own moans as you gripped Satan's arms. He was rumbling deeply, seemingly okay with purring if not meowing.

Satan didn't seem to notice anything other than what he was feeling inside you, but he couldn't hold back from nipping at your skin. You gasped every time his teeth pierced you, a little zing of pain to go with your overwhelming pleasure.

"S-Satan," you moaned out, feeling yourself getting close, the tension rising.

Satan seemed to understand what you needed. He reached between your bodies so he could stimulate you further with his hand. You gasped and your hips rose up into him.

You reached up to grab the collar, wanting to hold onto it as your entire body tensed hard, the brightness shattering behind your eyes as you cried out Satan's name, the bell continuing to tinkle merrily through it all.

Satan strained hard against the collar, but you still had it in your grip. You felt the warmth of his cum filling you and your fingers slipped away as you collapsed back against the bed.

Satan looked at you, a question in his eyes. The cat ears were still on his head, but they were askew, poking oddly out of his blond hair.

You reached up to fix them. "Promise me you'll wear these again."

Satan let out a huff, frowning. "I couldn't refuse you even if I wanted to."

You smirked. "Good thing you don't want to, then."

Perhaps next time, you would bring a little leash, too. You were curious about how he would react to such an addition. Although he seemed unlikely to do this again when his brothers were around, so you might have to wait. You caught yourself kind of hoping one of his brothers would come home just to hear the consistent jingling of the bell on Satan's cat collar.

masterlist | Thank you for reading!

[todomitoukei]

Honestly it’s a depressing ending for the villains. We get hardly any follow up for the remaining ones, Toga was the last one I expected to die and I was hoping it was a ruse at first. But since it’s official it’s heartbreaking. It’s lacklustre just throwing in a character to portray Tomura and what would happen if a civilian did reach a hand out, and throwing in another character for Deku to interact with. Honestly even the heroes were pointless, nothing has really changed in the system. Hawks never got a consequence for his actions, hell it could have been explored of a hero murdering a villain questioning the like of what makes a villain or hero. But he rises in ranks and has done nothing. I just feel it’s such a rushed ending, and I would have been ok with the same ending if it didn’t feel so messy and compiled together. There are so many loose ends and follow ups from characters, Shoto especially. It’s unfortunate, but honestly I’m glad it’s over. I lost passion after a while, but I appreciate the joy it’s gave me when I first started following the manga and getting into the anime, and experiencing the highs and lows of manga leaks. Dabi was my main one, and it’s one positive I gain from this ending for how open it is to his fate. It’s just sad that it ended this way.

Hori's biggest strength is for sure coming up with interesting ideas - like you said, exploring certain parts could've made for an incredibly interesting story. However, his biggest weakness is not following through with what he's starting, doing a 180 right at the end every time.

The cast has always been too big, yet he chooses to show us minor villains like Gentle and La Brava - who receive a happy ending - while the main antagonists endings aren't even being shown.

As much as the villains dying sucks (subjectively but also objectively since the story spent so much time telling us it's about reaching out and helping everyone no matter what), if they had been at least given a proper conclusion it could've been acceptable, yet after 400+ chapters, the author couldn't even bother to show all the main antagonists and their endings.

Where exactly is Spinner? We know he wrote and published a book, but is he in jail and if so, how did they allow him to publish this book?

Is Compress in jail forever? Is he still in a cell with Geten? He read Spinner's book, but how did he get hold of it? Was the prison kind enough to give him a copy?

What about Touya? Assuming he's dead, how much longer did he have? Did his family care when he died? How is the family coping? Are they getting along? Why did Horikoshi not show us Natsuo and Touya talk after spending so much time saying they used to be so close? Natsuo not saying anything and having mixed emotions after all of this was actually an interesting idea, but not when you don't do anything more with it - now people just think Natsuo is an asshole when in reality, he has every right to feel conflicted, but it sucks as a conclusion when we've all been looking forward to seeing him and Touya finally get to reunite and be happy.

What was the point of Shigaraki appearing as a ghost to Deku? Why wouldn't he at least appear in front of his friends? Why wouldn't we see him show up in front of Spinner, approving his book or something?

And yes, Shouto, too. Why is the main info we get in regards to his father? What about his hero costume, which we aren't even being shown? Did he ever change his hero name or is it going to be Shouto forever?

I wouldn't even say it's rushed as much as it's an unbalanced focus. The last few chapters could've been focusing on these subplots, but instead Hori tried to mimick the tone of the first season by showing the kids returning to school and whatnot, something that could've been shown in less time to also make space for elaborating on a bigger variety of characters and plot points.

I'm also glad it's over, I just wish these characters could've been in a better story.

[trungles]

Processing Process, and More Processing

I made this post free and publicly readable on Patreon, but I'm reposting the whole thing right here too because, well, it's a free post, and I don't want to make you click away from your dashboard if you don't need to. But also if you want to support my work, here's the link to the post.

It's a little bit about cartooning, a little bit about drawing, and then it turns into a eulogy for a chicken.

I wrote “process” more than once, and now the word looks funny and is beginning to lose its meaning to me.

This post is about a few things, and it’s a little bit on the sad end of things. Nothing dire! No worries. There’s just a little mention of death, just as a heads up.

Before we get to that, though, I’ve been doing some work and had some thoughts.

I’m often asked about how I draw the noodle hair on my characters, and the answer is typically that I draw each and every line with my hand. But there are considerations of movement and volume that go into it beyond its texturally decorative purposes. I love being able to convey shape and motion with it. It’s less evident, I think, in my illustration work, but I think it’s much more obvious when I do sequential work. In the above image, you can see me working out a sequence of Angelica having a series of thoughts. Her head sort of moves, and her eyes follow. You can see I’d planned out the general shape of the hair and how I’d like it to move.

I wound up moving the drawings a little bit so that the readers eyes will actually follow the character’s eyes as it moves gently rightward on the page. The hair is there to accentuate the movement, like so:

It’s a consideration I employ in all my drawings, but especially when I’m drawing hair and fabric. I don’t use a lot of action lines, so this becomes an important way to give the reader the information that someone is moving through a space. Resistance, gravity, and motion are all things I have to keep in the back of my head when I’m doing these little drawings. I think the planning actually takes more time than the inking, which can happen pretty quickly once I map it all out.

In other news, I’m starting to take my extracurricular artistic development a little more seriously in the silliest way possible.

You wouldn’t know it, but I studied painting college—a medium I switched to after the printmaking professor and head of the Art Department at the time told me I probably shouldn’t be an artist (he gave me a hard candy for my trouble). I recently bought a bunch of little dolls, dressed them up, and am returning to my painting roots. It feels really nice to work in big blobs of color instead of lines. It’s an exercise I came up with in response to a common lament from art students.

One of the more aggravating generational tensions described to me by art school students is when professors describe a student’s portfolio as “too anime” without much explanation. I know what the professor means. They’re trying to get at how referencing your favorite anime or cartoons means that your style becomes a simulacrum, an imperfect copy of a copy, and you never learn to develop your own sense of judgment about where a line or a shape needs to go. And we can tell. It’s a way of working that is perfectly fine for cartooning because cartooning is closer to hand-writing than it is to drawing. I always turn to Charles Schulz’s work for an example. Those figures aren’t literally depicting children—with their little chessboard-pawn proportions and bread-loaf feet—but we read them as endearing children because we’ve come to a consensus between us, the readers, and Charles Schulz, the author, that those shapes mean those things. There are no whiskers or paws in the shape of the word “CAT�� but you look at those three letters together, and you know the thing to which it refers. That’s an aspect of cartooning, too. Of course, what elevates it from mere writing is, in part, due to the fact that those little figures do not lose their meaning the more you depict them.

To really draw well, though, you have to do those fundamentals. You have to draw from life. There’s no way around it. It helps you develop a stronger sense of where you like to lay down your lines and shapes, no matter how stylized you like to work. It grows your judgment, and every artist’s best tool is their own well-honed sense of artistic discernment about their own work.

But that doesn’t mean you have to surrender the stuff you like or the things that inspire you to make art! I tell students that if they want to hold fast to their anime style AND hone their fundamentals to develop their eye as an artist, they should buy little figurines and toys of their favorite characters, prop those up against a light source, and draw them as still life objects. Like, yes, do the vases and the figure drawings and all those, I still think those are important. But if this is what you need to keep you interested in drawing from life, having some toys around is a great way to do it! Also, bless those sculptors and toy designers. They’re the best.

I think there’s something to be said about remembering to imagine the physicality of the things we draw, in all its dimensions and in the way it catches the light or casts a shadow. It helps sentimentalize things, too. Makes them feel more real, even emotionally.

Edwina died on Tuesday night, after a few final snuggles, surrounded by her favorite treats. She was about five years old, which is old for a chicken, and she had a very comfortable life. We buried her this morning. She was a good hen, J’s personal favorite.

It really feels like the end of an era. She was the last surviving member of our very first flock. After the other hens died, she really seemed to prefer the company of people over other hens. She is survived by Snooki and Nelly, our two other young birds who get along quite well together, actually.

A baby chick costs between three and five American dollars, typically. An egg-laying hen could be between twenty and fifty bucks, depending on the breed. There are roughly 26 billion chickens living in the world today, about 518 million of them here in the United States. They come pretty cheap. And a part of me was moved to cynicism, entertaining the thought that it might be strange to feel sadly over a little animal that, at most, might be roughly equivalent to the price of a fancy lunch and a coffee.

I watched the 1974 musical version of The Little Prince recently, and I remember it mostly because Bob Fosse was in it and scared the crap out of me as a kid—he played the snake that would take the Little Prince back into the sky when his body gets too heavy to take with him. Gene Wilder plays the Fox whom the Little Prince befriends and tames among a garden of roses. The Fox explains that he is like any other fox in the world, but he is changed—made special and particular to the Little Prince—with time, effort, and patience. So, too, is the Prince’s little flower special to him. Out of all the flowers in the universe, she was the one he watered and protected under a little glass jar. And that’s enough.

I knew my little hen would not live that long. It could be very easy to take a broad view of the life expectancy of a hen and distance myself from it by virtue of its mortality and its commonness. People who raise livestock do it all the time. But I also think it’s wonderful that we should all be capable of loving very small, very brief little things. Edwina is not, to my mind, the rough equivalent of a fancy lunch and a coffee. She was our little hen. For her whole life, she was ours. And I’m so happy she was here.

[bebe-writes-stuff]

PLEAAAASE WRITE SOMETHING ABOUT BAJI AGAIN!! the last one was amazing 🌹

You stared at the multiple letters you had stuffed in your drawer, not sure how long it's been since this all started, a couple months probably. It all started that one afternoon, you found something jammed in your locker. After Struggling to open your locker, you found a neat light pink envelope. Your heart skipped a beat at the heart-filled letter inside the envelope, it was a love confession. You were surprised to say the least, but what you hadn't expected is that the next day, at the same time, you found a different letter but the same light pink envelope. This time, there was a snack with the letter. A smile tugged on your lips as you finished the last sentence of the letter,

"P.S. I know you missed lunch because of your mathematics exam, I got you a snack. I hope you enjoy them! <3"

You somehow felt safe, instead of creeped out or nervous. It felt as if someone was looking after you, making sure you've eaten and stayed hydrated. That snack turned into more and then into straight up gifts, whether it was a new pair of headphones because yours broke, a new book you've been wanting to read, or a cute stuffed animal with a small note as,

"This reminded me of you! <3"

It was the highlight of your day. Time after time, you hadn't realized that you'd fallen in love with a totally mysterious person. Suddenly, it was Baji's turn to be surprised when he was placing the-who-knows-what-number pink enveloped letter in your locker, when he noticed you had left it open this time instead of him having to bust it open like all the other times. He was going to place his letter, when he found a light blue envelope. In neatly written letters,

To whoever continues to give me those pink enveloped letters <3

Baji snatched the letter, he glared at it hard. Were you gonna tell him to leave you alone and not bother you any longer. He swallowed the lump in his through before gently opening the light blue envelope. He hated how you flustered him when you wrote how you appreciated and loved everything he has done for you and wanted to meet him more than anything. That caught him off guard...you wanted to meet him. Did you know it was him? No way, he made sure he was the sneakiest he could be. But even if you did meet him, would you love a dangerous and wild delinquent like him, also no way. He stuffed the letter in his pocket before remembering his reason for being here. He put the letter in your locker before the school bell rang, conveying the end of the school day. He left before anyone could catch him standing at your locker. That's how it was for the next few weeks that turned into months. You left your locker open in the morning after placing your light blue enveloped letter and waited for the pink enveloped letter in the afternoon. That's how you would say "communicated". It was late at night, you were running back and forth in your room looking for more blue envelopes. You had run out and forgot to get some, little did you know someone was also dealing with a similar problem.

Dammit, I ran out of envelopes. I gotta go to the store.

Dammit, I ran out of envelopes. I gotta go to the store.

You were surprised the store was still open at this hour. You didn't waste time, heading straight to the envelope, letters, and gift cards section in the store. You weren't alone. Your eyes scanned over the shelf until you found it.

"Ah, there they are."

You reached out for the blue envelopes only to bump into someone else's hand reaching for a similar envelope as well. You gasped and took a few steps back before lowering your head a little.

"O-oh sorry about that."

FUCK, WHY SHE HERE RIGHT NOW?!

He froze once he realized what truly happened. He couldn't utter a single word. You looked up at him, before tilting your head to the side,

"Uh, are...you ok-"

You also froze once you saw the similar envelope in his hands. You glanced at the envelope in your own and before looking at his again.

Oh, he came for envelopes too...pink ones.

"um, sorry again."

You felt a little nervous under his gaze but you turned around and tried to ignore how he eyed you down. You head to the cashier to pay for the new set of envelopes,

"Is that all for tonight?"

"Yeah, thank you."

You sunk into your bed unable to sleep though. The interaction with the boy at the store never once leaves your mind. That was Baji Keisuke. He acted like a nerd at school...well, he never really got good grades, he just looked like that part. But outside of school, he was a known delinquent. He was violent and wild. This was your first time seeing him outside of school. The pink envelopes he was holding, could it be? No, no, someone like Baji couldn't have a soft spot. It was simply just a coincidence that he was there, at the same store, at the same hour, at the same aisle, wanting the same thing. You could lie to everyone else, just not yourself. You rolled out of your bed and headed to your drawer.

Now, back to where we were. You were staring at the piles of letters in your drawer. The letters were from none other than Baji Keisuke. Now that you knew, you couldn't help but think about all the little details he shared about himself. His best friend, now that you know, he must've meant Chifuyu. The cat that sneaks onto his balcony, Peke J. Were you going to go to school and face him! After all the embarrassing facts you told him, your secrets, your everything! You'd rather die.

"Fucking hell Chifuyu, she found out AND in the dumbest way ever. She hasn't come to school for like a week also."

"It's okay Baji, Just try and focus on this meeting and get your mind off things for a little bit."

He couldn't focus on the meeting or anything for the past week. It had gotten so bad, even his mother was worried. He wanted to tell you in a proper way that it was him writing to you all the time, he wanted a proper way for you to know his fat crush on you. Baji snapped out of trance when he heard Draken's loud shout,

"THIS MEETING'S DISMISSED."

It's over this quick, damn I didn't pay attention to shit.

"Oh, also Baji, there was this girl asking about you before you came tonight. I think she's actually waiting for you down in the parking lot.

"WHAT?! DAMMIT, CHIFUYU WHAT THE HELL DO I DO?! SHE'S IN THE PARKING LOT DAMMIT! IT WAS YOUR IDEA WRITING HER LETTERS, HELP ME BITCH!"

"Wait what?"

Draken was confused to say the least.

"BAJI, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I AM SORRY! M-MAYBE TRY TALKING TO HER?"

It was a shouting match between the both while everyone stared confused, but they both failed to realize that you heard them from the parking lot and had made your way to the shrine and facing the both of them. Well, Chifuyu noticed first and when he did, all the color drained from his face and he look like he was going to pass away, his last thoughts were

Baji's gonna kill me, Rest in peace me...

"Huh, why'd you look like that? Who's behind m-"

He turned around only to be met with the same fate as Chifuyu. He let him go and stared at you with a nervous expression only to shock everyone watching. Baji, The first division captain of Toman, is nervous because of this girl. A heavy cloud of awkwardness fogged the air between the both of you. You approached first before pulling out a neat stack of pink enveloped letters tied with also a pink ribbon.

"T-these...they're yours aren't they?"

You were flustered and your voice barely audible, you were standing in front of your all-time-crush. He looked away and scoffed,

"Yeah! So what if they're mine, I'll leave you alone if you want...I know you don't wanna mess with any delinquents and that type of shit. Why'd you come here anyway? If this is some prank from you corny ass friends I swear I am gonna-"

"Ohmygosh you talk a lot, just shut up."

You pulled him with both your hands cupping his face into a deep unpredicted kiss, It was almost his instinct to pull you closer. One hand pulled you in with a hug while his other hand found its way to its neck pulling you gently by your throat, wanting more of your lips, that tasted oh so good with your strawberry flavored Chapstick. You pulled away when you both needed a breath of oxygen. Your eyes locked, it was an unexplainable attraction that you both had for each other, it was a spark that you felt, all the way from the night you saw him at the store until now. It was a spark that flickered more and more the closer each step you took towards him until it fully flared when you pulled him into such a sensual kiss.

"Regarding your last letter. Yeah, I'd love to go out with you. <3"

-I'll write a part 2 w/ smut if you guys want, let me know please!

[zinya]

How brothers would react to an MC with bad grades ?

Because we've all had bad grades one day and we all deserve to be comforted.

Lucifer:

Being one of the students in the exchange program he will look at your grades very closely , he may even be aware of your grade before you do.

If it's just one bad grade he will lecture you and probably ban you from certain activities so that you work more (You can say goodbye to video game nights with Levi)

If it's several bad grades he will start asking you questions about what you don't understand and will give you lessons.

Of course, if it's grades that start to weigh on your morale, once your homework is finished, you're welcome to his room to relax.

"I believe in you, don't be discouraged, my love"

Mammon

welcome to the club

If it's a bad grade in math don't worry, The Great Mammon can help you.

Don't be discouraged human, he also has bad grades and lives very well

If he sees that you are depressed because of your grades he will suggest that you go out somewhere with him to take your mind off things. Do you prefer to go shopping or maybe go party somewhere?

If you don't want to go out then he will take you into his room and watch a movie in his arms while he comforts you and cuddle with you

Leviathan

I am convinced that he will show you anime with heroes at school to remotivate you "Hey I have a new anime called "I have bad grades and then everything changed the day I made friends"

If you don't want to, you can always watch TSL with him

But don't get me wrong he will encourage you to work too but he will come get you to take a break if it's been a long time

I don't know if devildom has computer science, but in any case if it's this subject that you're struggling with, he can help you.

Satan

Literally become your personal teacher after all, all his knowledge is yours.

Will lend you textbooks and workbooks

He will always encourage you to do your best

Like mammon he will also offer to go out and clear your mind: Do you want to buy new books? Go drink something at the cat cafe? Maybe the park?

Will read books to you or recite lessons at night in his room when you sleep together

Asmodeus

Positive affirmations

Are you discouraged? Has your self-confidence taken a hit? Spend 10 minutes with him and none of this will happen

"Honey don't cry your pretty skin and your beautiful eyes will suffer "

Will ask you to go shopping with him and you will receive 2 or 3 gifts so he can see you smile

He will help you with the charms lessons (TP too perhaps XD)

You will have the right to take a bath in his bathroom with his products to relax

Beelzebub

Will give you food to comfort you

Would like to help you with potions classes but we all know how it will end

Will give you hugs to comfort you and take you to exercise (if you want of course) to clear your mind

If you decide to study more he will come see you like Levi to take breaks and he will often bring you water or snacks

He will cheer you to death like you do during his matches

Maybe give you a kind of lucky charm to bring you luck for the next exams

Belphegor

Cuddle time

Since it concerns you, he will listen to you talk, like Asmo, about what is wrong

Then he will take you to the top of the Attic to sleep and relax with him

When you revise he comes and sleeps in your bed to keep you company

If you can't sleep because of stress you know where his room is , just kidding, he's already next to you in your bed, can't you see him?

(I don't know who drew this but it's so beautiful.) Anyway, I wrote that instead of studying my exam for tomorrow haha 😅🥲

Sorry for the mistakes, English is not my first language and sometimes I don't understand your abbreviations or expressions🤣

Tell me if you want the others

And don't forget that the most important thing is to do all you can and to be proud of yourself.

Have a Good day 💋

[twig-tea]

I Owe an Apology to Cherry Magic Thailand

This is me righting a wrong. A few weeks ago I wrote this post in response to an ask about Thai BL including what Thai BLs airing at the time I was enjoying the most; I listed Cooking Crush and Dead Friend Forever, which was true. I didn't list Cherry Magic Thailand, and the reason for that is the timing of that post coinciding with the very unfortunate Cherry Magic Thailand episode 8 which was a filler episode that made some really unfortunate choices. None of those choices affected the relationship writing or character arcs of the main characters, but the conflict was poorly written--it didn't fit well in the narrative, it didn't even really make sense, and it didn't land the way it was clearly meant to--and I was afraid that the writers of the show would not realize the really interesting things they had done with the main characters in the Thai adaptation and how that would have to change the way the story progressed in order to be consistent, and so I was ready to watch this show go off the rails. But happily, I was wrong, and instead we got an excellent episode 9 and 10, so I am here to publicly tell you:

Watch Cherry Magic (Thai adaptation)!

The one episode 8 misstep is worth living through for the greatness that is happening in this series.

If you're familiar with the source material, here are a few things that I absolutely LOVE the Thai adaptation is doing (very light spoilers, I kept the big stuff out so that you could read and still be pleasantly surprised if you decide to watch the show):

The "magic" is used in fun and clever ways that keep the show funny, interesting, and fresh

Achi [the Thai Adachi] is more self-actualized and self-driven from the get-go, and is more willing to fight for the relationship

Karan [the Thai Kurosawa] is even more of a simp, and is less outwardly perfect than in the Japanese live action, and is also a little hornier (though not as much as the anime version lol)

Both Achi and Karan have stronger character arcs in the Thai adaptation than Adachi and Kurosawa did in the Japanese live-action

Jinta and Min [the Thai version of Tsuge and Minato] are also really great; they're hitting a lot of the same beats but at different times, which makes their progression feel stronger, and there is less of an emphasis on the age difference between them than in the Japanese live action

Min also gets an arc with Rock [Rokkaku] that gives him more depth than in the Japanese live action

We get more of Jinta and Achi's friendship than we did with Adachi and Tsuge

Pai [Fujisaki in the Japanese adaptation] is a fujoshi, which is from the original manga, but the show is still doing something really interesting with her as (I think?) a nod to Fujisaki in the Japanese live action being on the aro/ace spectrum

They have done a great job making the show feel Thai (e.g. including Thai cultural festivals, changing the scarf to an umbrella, adjusting the humour)

There is a kiss!

Anyway. I'm really enjoying it, and it's worth fighting past the annoyance of needing a VPN set to Thailand and waiting an extra day in order to access the show on VIU's website.

[tdlosk-confessions]

What do you think is one one of the most wholesome moments in the Saiki K anime?

Ooooo that's a difficult one. There are a lot of wholesome sweet moments it's kinda hard to choose

But I were to go off the top of my head I'd probably say one of the most wholesome moments to me is Kaidou reading out the birthday letter he wrote for Saiki during the Season 1 Finale episode

It's a bit sad they didnt know his actual birthday and instead thought his dad's was his but the fact Saiki didn't want to hurt their feelings by telling them (bittersweetish?)

But. Look at the letter:

"Dear Saiki, I know you'll think it's overdramatic of me to write you a letter but that's okay. You're a great friend who I share many precious memories with. I can't believe it's only been 6 months since we met at the start of the anime series. Anyway, thanks to you, I met everyone else and they brought joy to my life in so many ways too! I know it's sappy but it's true. It'd good to know you're always looking out for me, I wanna be a better person because of you. Thank you for being born.

- Happy Birthday from Kaidou"

LIKE. TELL ME THATS NOT THE MOST HEARTFELT MONOLOGUE IN THIS SERIES. It's genuinely so sweet

AND HE SMILES AT IT TOO!!!!!!!

"what a pain. guess i can't stop them after all." <- boy who totally can stop them but is choosing not to

OH ALSO kuniharus conversation with saiki too

Kuniharu: "Let's switch now, so you can have fun."

Kusuo: "Yeah, I'll pass. If I go down there I'll just kill the mood."

Kuniharu: "Who cares about that? Those kids like you Kusuo, and deep down you like them too. After all, you asked me to take your place so they wouldn't feel bad about getting your birthday wrong, right? But they didn't come to spend time with me. Even if the mood does change, I think they'd rather be with you. Go down there, son."

Kusuo: "...Who are you to give me advice?"

Kuniharu: "I'm your DAD."

Like just. Sobs. SOOOOOOOOBS

AND HES RIGHT TOO!!!! HES RIGHT!!!! Saiki does care about his friends even if he doesn't show it, and his friends appreciate him even if to them he's quiet and not as lively as his dad was acting to pretend to be him

The whole episode was good like wtf they made him a cake and make him a video birthday card like WHATA IM JUST. WOW.

sorry for the ramble but it's genuinely one of the most wholesome (and one of my favorite!) moments/episodes of the series!!!

TL;DR: kaidous birthday letter to saiki and kuniharu speech to saiki

[psychomusic]

i had a vague idea last night on chiss space-traveling system. it's really just an idea and maybe it breaks the existing lore so. if there's any chiss expert here PLEASE tell me if it's something that could exist because i wanna know if i can put it to use in my story

i know they use force sensitives with that third sight power, but like. idk. i understand that they are trained and sometimes they fail but like that's SO complex. you're traveling faster than light - you can have jedi like reflexes and shit but that's still hard af.

so i was imagining (because lately I've been trying to better understand chiss lore, which i LOVEEE) wouldn't it be easier if there were like some stations in between planets, especially important colonies, to allow the force sensitives to have to navigate between smaller points, and not completely in the dark?

idk if any of you know sky: children of the light's trial of fire, so here's the link (skip the intro part). now imagine that instead of the checkpoints with rocks and candles you have little artifical moons/planets/asteroids (depending on how important that station is), and force sensitives are supposed to reach that and then re orientate etc.

BUT to make it cooler and most importantly, easier to sense for the force sensitives, imagine that those artificial ecosystem are made to be inhabited by different creatures that can't stay on their planet of origin (like. maybe because the environment changed and they are endangered, or they're too dangerous so they like. put them there). so they're full of life. they'd be like lit candles in the dark, literally.

THIS CAME TO ME BECAUSE TWO WEEKS AGO I SAW SUCH A COOL VIDEO (a 12 hour analysis of the phantom menace that's like. so fucking well-researched??? considering its length it's impressive really, so here's the link) that spoke (at 1:19:22) about that Boss Nass's phrase about going through Naboo's planet core. But to synthetize: basically in the lore, Naboo is supposed to lack a molten core, and at the center of the planet, plasma is being emitted, and it creates infinite tunnels that can connect even theed and otho gunga. but besides other worldbuilding problems that this rather absurd idea would create - that i won't recap here - in the video, there are some ideas on how to make it make sense (like. "going through the planet core" is simply a figure of speech and not what actually happened), BUT between those, there is one in particular that struck me: at 1:30:40, he proposed Naboo could be a constructed planet - like a planet-aquarium.

then, the video explains why it can't be the case for naboo but. GUYS!! if there's a species that could pull off something like that it's the chiss, with their sense of order, their need for knowledge, and organization abilities.

the maintenance of these stations with particular ecosystems could then be left at the nearest colony of csilla (kinda like the romans delegated the maintenance of their streets to each town it crossed and benefitted off of it), and be used as a "lighthouse" for new sky-walkers to train their third sight. researchers would benefit from keeping these animals alive + they could be kept in various different scenarios depending on how the specific station is made. if it's big enough, those creatures wouldn't be even captive, in a certain sense. especially since these stations need to be big enough (and full of life) to be perceived by the force sensitives, they'd just become replicas of the planet, where researchers, even in the creation of such stations, can really have a boost on their understanding of those ecosystems, through the feedbacks and experiments on the stations.

i have made a few sketches to visualize the idea

(ugly quality and poor rendition ops. in my defense it was late)

i know i wrote A LOT and prob not many will read this BUT if you've come this far, what do you think?

[heterosexualomegaverse]

Personal top favorite fics on ao3 of all time

- living's just a waste of death by author tothendoftheline

Best Political Animals fanfic out there. I consider it the canon ending. I think all my longest comments ever I posted on ao3 were on this fic. It's a mostly canon compliant detailed exploration of what TJ's life would actually be like. How his (childhood) trauma effected him. His time as a white house kid, his sexuality, his addictions. It starts pre-canon and goes on long after canon has ended. TJ starts working on himself, his relationships with his family change, he gets new friends (kinda). Idk if I'm selling it well but I love it so much.

- Known Associates by author Thingswithwings

Fic that made me ship Steve and Rhodey lol. Though Steve calls him Jim. Was rereading it yesterday and damn its so good. an (I think) realistic depiction of queer life in the 1930's and 1940's then the movie plot happens and Steve is in 2012 and now has to figure out what/ who he is in this century. Also got a plot about kinda being experimented on and turned into super soldiers.

- The Barnes Files by author PaintedDoe

Bucky Barnes' therapy sessions in transcript format. (can you tell I love character studies)

- Flawed Perfection by author Squiggles13

Also part of a series but I haven't read the other parts yet. This one also mostly starts as Bucky going to therapy but then the tfatws plot happens but changed to be way better.

- Teach Me by author stucktogether

Steve/Bucky college au. Steve things he's straight but can't seem to keep his eyes off of Bucky. It's isn't until they've fooled around a half dozen times or so that he things he may just be bisexual. This Bucky's also got some deep lore.

- Treading water by author sparkagrace

SteveBucky olympic swimmers au where they were childhood friends that got separated at 12 but reunited at the olympics, except Bucky's presence brings back a lot of feelings that Steve can't deal with. This one gets real angsty. It has a sequel that is even more angsty.

- (A series) 'Til the End of the Line by author ohstars

SteveBucky with marvel canon except what if they were gay. Until endgame where shit is changed a lot cuz you know the time-travel staying in the past obviously doesn't happen. It does go on after that. They finally come out to the team (cuz they were closeted to whole time with Sam being the only one who knows) They have kids together, get married and then there is some time travel shenanigans and a lot of stuff until they both die of old age.

- The Island Man by author Amber_Skye

What if Steve Rogers was never found in the ice and got rescued by shield, but instead got out himself, but still only in 2012? And no one believes he is actually Steve Rogers Captain America? He ends up homeless doubting his own mind. Maybe he really isn't Steve Rogers? Maybe he really is crazy

anyway idk why I wrote this. I just wanted to list some of my faves. didn't really put a lot of thought into this, it's late and I'm tired.

[lil-ms-darkness]

Warm Like Baked Bread: Bigby Wolf x Goldilocks!Fem!Reader

A/N: I wrote this a while ago, and I hope you enjoy it.

For comic readers, this is an AU where Goldilocks is not a total extremist psychopath and is, instead, a survivor of circumstance. Living with the human Fable community in New York.

I have a few more small continuations to this in the works, so if you enjoyed this one, you can look forward to those.

-Lil_Ms_Darkness

“Come on in!” The woman calls from inside.

Bigby knocks on the wooden door, already able to smell the fresh baked goods from outside. 

He looked to his right, finding her in the small kitchenette with a loaf of freshly baked bread cooling on the counter next to a couple cubes of decorated fabric, two decently sized boxes on the small island. 

Just inviting people inside can’t be very safe But he tries the doorknob anyway, stepping through the door, closing it and walking down the small hallway that opens up into a one room apartment, a small love seat to the far right, back against a pony wall that a twin sized bed rested against on the other side. The bed has one long pillow, a plush looking throw at the end and a sea of stuffed animals. Against the wall across from the love seat, a tv set rests, framing two windows with sheer curtains. 

“Are you just going to stand there, inspecting my home or are you going to come in, properly?” She asks and he notices the curly blonde hair tied into a messy bun, plain jeans and t-shirt covered by a pink apron. When she looks over at him, a single curl falls past her brow, warm eyes examining him for a brief moment before returning to her work. 

Yeah, I do have the smallest apartment. Damn.

“Nice place you got here.” He muses as she sets a plastic container holding 6 muffins on top of one of the fabric squares, covering them and popping the holes in to protect the product before she wraps them up with a small bow tied in the fabric on top. She moves to set the muffins in one of the boxes, but he can still smell the baked blueberries and sweet, cooked sugar. 

“Thank you, Sheriff. You’re welcome to sit at the island, if you’d like.” She offers without looking at him.

“I’m not here for an order, I need to ask you a few questions.” But he steps on the other side of the counter to stay out of her way. Her meticulous movements seem rehearsed and fluid like water. 

“Ask away.” She says simply, continuing on her work. 

“I understand you have a baking business,” he gestures to the pans and assorted baked items littering her countertops, “-do you do this full time?”

“Doesn’t leave you much down time.” He mutters

“Not quite. I have a full time job at the Trip Trap as a bartender. It’s not super busy, but since Lily was- ahem, since Lily passed, Holly needed a little more time so she could focus on herself a bit more. Woody talked me up to her, and boom, full time gig. When I’m not working there, I’m either delivering orders, or preparing orders.” 

“No, but if you have a goal, sacrificing a little bit of forever doesn’t seem so bad.” She smiles, faintly. “And when I open up my Bed and Breakfast, it’ll all be worth it.” She sighs, softly and dreamily.

“Bed and Breakfast, huh?”

“Many of us are down on our luck, barely scraping by. Just look at Toad and TJ. I’m planning to open up my Bed and Breakfast to help Fables have a safe, clean place to go. Besides the Farm.” She wraps up the now cooled loaf of bread, “Why the interest in my career?” 

“Have you been approached by anyone wanting to purchase sweets specifically for Snow White?” He leans forward, gauging her reaction.

Her eyes move up to his in an instant, 

“She’s okay, right?” 

 “If you know something you need to tell me.”

“You do know something.” He examines her eyes, and he can read concern in them.

 She definitely was approached by our guy.

“No, she’s safe.” He says, calmly.

“Yes, a gentleman asked for a special delivery to the Business Office for Snow White. 3 boxes of white chocolate covered strawberries and a raspberry drizzle with an apple crumble pie.” She says cautiously and Bigby squints at the mention of an apple pie. “I had the same reaction, Sheriff. I don’t read other Fables stories, but it doesn’t take a genius to know how she’d feel about that one...she is okay, right? I refused to do it, he didn’t do anything to her, did he?”

“Good.” She sighs, and pulls down a plate and a small fork, setting a muffin onto it. 

“Did he give you a name?”

“I’m pretty sure he gave me a fake one,” she uses a butter knife to cut open the muffin before adding some butter to it, “but he gave me an alternate delivery address before I refused the order. Something about 'I understand that interacting with a princess would be nerve wracking'.” 

“Do you still have it? The address?”

“I might, let me check.” She sets the plate with the muffin in front of him, wiping her hands on her apron and opening a drawer, digging around it.

“Free sample?” He asks, glancing down at the muffin. He can smell it already and it smells delicious. 

“A thank you.” She corrects without looking up from the drawer.

“For?”

“Can’t say I’m surprised you don’t remember. You ate a man who was trying to get into my treehouse back in the Homelands. I doubt you did it to help me, you looked hungry, but it doesn’t change the fact that you may have saved me from worse horrors that day.” 

“Mmm, most people would’ve been worried I’d eat them, too.” He muses.

“Maybe that’s why I’m feeding you now, you’ll never know.” She pushes something else aside in the drawer as she speaks, then lets out a little “There you are.” before pulling out a piece of paper, torn from a full sized piece of lined paper. She hands it over and he takes it, reading the address. 

He has what he came for, but the muffin still permeates his senses. He picks up the fork and tears a piece of muffin off, inhaling the scent again with a slow sniff through his nose.

“Don’t worry, I only use the best poison for clients of your magnitude.” She smirks for the first time and his brown eyes lifted to meet hers, clearly not amused with the joke. “I’m joking, I doubt poison would kill you anyway. And the last thing I need is the charge of killing the Sheriff of Fabletown on my rear.” He looks down at the muffin on the fork before he decides to take a bite. It was warm and fresh, the blueberries moist and the sugar sprinkled on top of the muffin crunchy and flavorful. “Besides, I’m sure there’s a reason the other Fables fear you.” 

He pauses, another piece of muffin close to his lips. 

“You don’t know why they’re all afraid of me?” He sounds genuinely confused and surprised. 

“I don’t read stories of other Fables, remember? Red did try to tell me about an encounter you two had at some point, something about her grandmother, but to tell you the truth, I was dealing with my own demons that I didn’t really hear her story fully. Then when Woody took me under his wing, he told me a bunch of stories about you, but honestly they all just sounded like someone trying to be bigger and badder than the next. So, I felt like it was pointless to hate you for things that didn’t directly involve me.” She shrugs, “Easy to say when you’re not experiencing what everyone is telling you about, but I don’t really care.”

“You knew Red?” He sounds surprised, “And the Woodsman?” Then he just sounded dumbfounded. 

“Woody isn’t a bad guy, a little unorthodox maybe, and a little bit of an alcoholic with a tendency for dumb decisions, but not inherently bad. As for lil Red, she was my best friend after my mother abandoned me.” She smiles softly at the thought of her friend. His brow furrows as he looks at her; he’d always thought she got lost in the woods after going too far out, or maybe just got bored and decided to wreak some havoc like many children do. Maybe made a mistake but tried to rectify it and be better, like himself. “Surprised, aren’t ya? That’s why I don’t read the stories, because mine is all messed up. Mom abandoned me in the middle of the woods and left, I haven’t seen her since. One thing they don’t mention was I was 5 at the time, and had spent the better part of a month in the woods, starving and freezing. So when I came across the Bear’s home, I went in and I ate their porridge and slept in their beds, I tracked mud in their chairs. But not because I wanted to, but because it was either  that or die, and I wanted to take advantage of the little bit of comfort I’d found.”

He didn’t remember asking, and he wonders why she seems so comfortable telling him her whole life story. Then again, he was still eating her muffin and he supposes he owes her a small token, after feeding him and giving the information he needed without any trace of being needing to pry it out of her. It likely would have taken this long if it were Holly or anybody else in Fabletown. He supposes she deserves an ear to listen. Besides, the strange sense of normalcy in how she spoke to him was oddly pleasant. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think they were friends for years. But the moment comes to a close as he finishes the last bite of his muffin and decides it’s time to get on his way.

He stands and sets the fork on his plate, 

“Do you want me to put this in the sink for you?” He asks but she shakes her head, “Alright then. Have a good night.” He heads for the door.

“Sheriff,” She calls and he glances over his shoulder to offer her his attention in pure silence. “In my line of work, both at the Trip Trap and in my own business, a lot of gossip passes me by. If you ever need information, my door is open to you. If I know something, I’ll share it.”

“And what do you want in return?” There’s always a catch, he knows there’s something. Nobody ever gives something for nothing, especially not to the Big Bad Wolf.

“You let me feed you when you come to visit.”

“That’s not much of an exchange.”

“Then, how about you get to know me, that way if you hear a version of that messed up story you can debunk it.”

He’s quiet for a moment, looking at her kind, inviting eyes. He nods once and turns, 

“Thank you, Goldilocks.”

“[F/N].”

“Hmm?”

“Call me [F/N].” 

Now alone in the hallway, he pulls out his pack of cigarettes and grabs one between his lips before he lights it. He takes a puff and pulls out the address on the paper. He suspects he’ll see her again, whether it be for information or just for another muffin. As he tucks the address away and walks down the hall, he almost looks forward to coming back.

“...Thank you, [F/N].” He heads to the door, opening it and closing it behind him. 

[adoresia]

Hello!! I saw you were taking requests for jjk this is my first time asking for anything but I was wondering if you could write something angsty for reader x Choso? It can be anything I’m just craving angst 😣😣

— 5 STAGES OF GRIEF

⋆.˚ WARNINGS : none it’s just sad ig 😅

⋆.˚ SYNOPSIS : In which Choso loses the love of his life

⋆.˚ SIERRA SPEAKS : I feel like I disappointed with this one I’m ngl😭 I kinda wrote it in Choso’s pov and got a bit to carried away, y/n is more read through his eyes if that even makes sense. Yeah I’m just gonna post it and see what happens cause idek atp. I hope I didn’t 100% disappoint you😔

Here we go again. The same reoccurring theme of death had once again pierced Choso’s heart, and this time it was unbearable. Even for a half cursed spirit like himself. The amplitude of his heart beats had grown heavier and heavier until it was consumed in sorrow, hatred, and most of all, anger. A feeling in his heart that wasn’t foreign, but is or was so intense that for the second time it felt like the furnace of hell had possessed his whole Existence .

But there he sat, bargaining with a pool full of his own tears. Yet again, over the loss of someone that he would’ve thought he could never lose. Someone he thought he would never lose, and yet he did. Again. In a house that was meant to reside the both of you. You and him, united, for the rest of eternity now only contained one.

And that was how it was going to be, even if he couldn’t come to terms with never feeling the warmth coursing through your veins. Even if it meant he could never again feel your precious heart beating exclamatively with love for him. Even if it meant he could no longer deny how softly you peered into his love-struck eyes, unraveling the story of what they told. Only because you could, because you were the only person who could.

Instead of you being there to tell him that everything would be okay, the stuffed panda that was poisoned with your scent was all he had left to comfort him. And although your aroma breathed through the stuffed animal you left behind purified senses, It would never ever be enough to purify his now eternally Brocken heart. Because without you anymore there was no point in his heart, there was no reason to live.

The space you once shared was now depressingly vacant. Everywhere he looked he was met with a soul shattering image of you, and it broke him even more that now your death was what he was forced to remember you by. Instead of the time he pointed up at the blanket of stars that stretched to infinity with you by his side. Everytime it replayed in his mind you had now become his very own hand-crafted star in the sky, now forever having to point up at you, it pained him that no matter how far he reached you were to far gone for him to bring back.

“Oh y/n. How I wish you were still here with me.”

[firefly--bright]

carry me out.

jean kirstein x reader , modern a.u.

summary ; you've let your predetermined, statistical thoughts on being loved carry you out for a long time. maybe you realise that jean should be an exception.

warnings ; HUGE trigger warning for suicidal thoughts, especially in the beginning. overall very angsty, but slight comfort at the end. no pre-existing relationship, only the indications of one. underage (?) alcohol consumption (please be safe n responsible with alcohol!)

a/n ; finally wrote a fic after like a month lmao im so sorry. a) for being gone so long and not updating my other fics but also b) returning with another heavy one. no promises if this is me coming out of my haitus, though, i still have end-sem submissions to worry about. everything has been hell but hey atleast im alive! anyways, as always, enjoy! also if you ever need anyone to talk to, im always here. please know that. youre not alone!

taglist ; @holding-infinity-and-a-book , @mrsnobodynobody , @hopeless-anti-romantic , @jeanscremebrulee , @berrijam , @cherrypieyourface , @imgayandshesanime , @moonmalice , @kiernova , @potaho3frog , @xakilicious , @katestrophes (please feel free to skip this story, even if you are tagged, if it's too heavy for you!!)

huge thank you to @raazberry my absolute favouritest person for beta reading this :3

masterlist is in pinned post ✿ enter my taglist! ✿

You weren’t going to live past the next three years.

You knew this – it was written in your teary-eyed thirteen year old self’s note to a much older you, “if youre still the same after everything and you still feel like this all the time, then why keep trying? If youre not happy in somewhere outside of your head, then why keep living? Do you really want to live past 24?”

The letter may have been written against your better judgement, and you could still feel the cold of your marbled bathroom tiles and the too-bright florescent light above your head as you tried to stop your hand from shaking, but you lived by it. In all reality, your hopes were dwindling, and this misshapen version of you that sat infront of the mirror looked more like a smudged charcoal drawing instead of your face. You didn’t know how or why it was the way it was, but you had to live with this, live with the burnt and shaky outline of yourself thanks to the years you spent with your light still ablaze.

you sigh. Its all you know how to do.

The door knocks and you shift from your mirror to the source. Your heart skips a beat and everything lulls into a low hum.

“hey,” he says, with your name on his tongue as if he’s kept it there for years. “we were thinking about going out now that midterms are over. You wanna join?” he asks, his thumb pointing to the invisible invitation outside of your room.

You blink, humming the semblance of what you’d call love in your mind. “maybe. What’s  in it for me?” you ask. A smile graces your face and it doesn’t feel that foreign.

He pretends to think, humming out the same tune that played in your head every waking moment, his voice a low and calm tide. “free food?”

You breathe out a laugh. This bit doesn’t feel like a play, it doesn’t feel like a script with big block letters and directions and your name written in all caps. It feels normal. It feels foreign.

“don’t tell sasha, though.” He says, pointing a finger at you with a loose fist.

“I make no promises.” You really don’t.

“well, then, you should."

Maybe you would.

 Connie’s laughter would usually be described as an annoying 11 year old’s, but today, it offered you comfort like ice against a bruise, and marco would usually be described as a worried father, but his warmth was appreciated when he held the door open for all of you to walk in. sasha was already inside, chatting with her boyfriend who couldn’t be more happy to look at her with his chin resting on his palm and a soft smile on his face. Sasha’s animated voice could usually be described as the babbling of a child, but today it offered to be the noise that you craved. She was dressed well, with a bow tied gently into her hair and you wondered how you got this lucky to be half-present in the light of these fools.

Jean was always next to you, always to your left, always silently giving you his secretly undivided attention. Even as connie got another round of drinks for the table, even when sasha ate all the fries that were supposed to be shared, even when marco, ever the extrovert, went to mingle with friends from his other classes, even as niccolo held sasha’s hair back when she entered an unsaid drinking competition with Mikasa and her unshaken record, he was there. To your left, looking at his right with a warmth and gentleness that would’ve shaken you had you noticed it.

There was chatter. There was always noise, something to occupy your mind, as you played with the condensation on your glass, silently waiting for connie to shout out another drink that he presumed youd enjoy. To his credit, you did enjoy them, but maybe downing them in one go wasn’t the best idea if you truly wanted to savour them, and if the attention you were getting from your left wasn’t so alert, you’d have left this bar a long time ago.

And this didn’t mean any harm to your friends. Of course not, they couldn’t help but be the sun. they couldn’t help being this all consuming light that couldn’t stop itself from touching and spilling onto any surface it could find. Truly, you loved them for it like how you loved the sun – from a distance, looking at it through squinted eyes because you were afraid of it’s beauty. No, it wouldn’t be their fault that you were too much of a coward to feel what they offered to everyone without the hesitation you had.

“this is the part where you tell me what’s on your mind.” Jean says from beside you, memorizing a script you weren't aware of. theres a chord in your mind that rings out as he does, beginning an unfinished song that would continue on for as long as you lived.

You hum. It gets lost with the increasing sound of the song in your head and around you. shaking your head, you say something that’s unconvincing to your already deaf ears. “nothing,”

His palms slide over your wrist, covering up the embarrassment your pulse brings to yourself with a softness that doesn’t fail to shake you this time, noticing the way he looks around the place youre in – a bar? Youre not sure. You haven’t been sure where you ever were – and stops as he finds one. He gives you a once-over and leads you to the haven he’s scanned around for. he refuses to remove his hand from your wrist and some small or large or whatever-is-remaining part of you wants him to keep it there until your body evolves to accommodate his skin on yours.

You wonder how he feels. For the first time in a while, you wonder what it feels like to live outside of your head, outside of your own whatever-is-remaining body, outside of the stripped bare bones with pieces of meat stuck on it after charred teeth having gorged upon it night and day for twenty years. Does he see you that way? Could he stand to see the state you had yourself in, an unholy and unceremonious shrine to yourself, with nothing but the most minutest proof of your existence instead of everything you’d always wanted to become? Or does he see you as something that remains standing despite it? Would he see you as just that- the proof of the proof?

“there we go. No more noise.” He says decidedly and you’d agree a thousand times over. The chord he plays still reverbs through the empty nest of your chest and you agree – its as present as the noise of silence.

You hum again. You have no words to say. He doesn’t let go of your wrist and you pretend not to notice, just as he does. His fingers are calloused and weathered under unsaid conditions but you hope its because of love. It’s a large word to say, to think and to feel but you’ve long since forgone the formalities of having to speak. In your head, all words mean the same and nothing at the same time.

“saw a cat today.” He says. In your head, you agree.

This means something. Each word he says has its own representation, its own grip and handle on you instead of it all being everything.

You lean against something solid. Only then do you realise youre at a rooftop – climbing the stairs wasn’t registered when you spent your time staring at your beloved’s back, observing how his shirt moved over his skin with every consequential step, every meaningful breath. You became even more blind to the bodies of people that were a thousand times more present than you.

Only then do you realise the brightness of the city lights under you. the building you were on didn’t look all that tall, but it seemed taller than the rest. There were people there, being alive, breathing their own air and their own sound as yours made none. You let jean’s breathing be enough for the two of you until you’d find the dormant strength in yourself to find your own.

“brown and ginger fur. It was this tiny-“ he says. You throw him a glance because youre afraid looking at him for more than that would leave you with no choice but to keep burning, and his hands cup an invisible ball-like shape. You smile, looking back at the distant windows that carry their hopes into the night sky. “If I see it again, im gonna name it cookie.” He says.

Your smile grows gentler under the curtain of your fingers that are curled up against your lips, your chin on your palm. You wonder then, again, how he sees you. do you seem uninterested? You don’t mean to be, and he should know, but you don’t have the courage or the guts to let him know otherwise. Your words will get jumbled by the time you decide to regurgitate it, they’ll spill out of you in a blurring mess. You’ll end up having to say your name thrice to believe youre still here, if at all.

He's silent. His shoulder brushes against yours and you feel this like a script of a play – written in big block letters with his name signed over it, written in the brackets because its something that needs notice.

HES BRUSHING YOUR SHOULDERS LIKE HE ALWAYS IS, and youre an idiot because you think it makes you yourself. In a bracket, its specified with your name on top in big block letters – HE SEES YOU.

When you turn your head to that god-awful, all consuming left side again, he does. He sees you and you decide that now is a good time to return back to the whatever-is-remaining body again. Your bones shake with the song that keeps playing when he’s around and maybe the hopefulness of the open window lights of the city before and after you carries your hopefulness with it.

Maybe the light that his eyes reflect can carry out your silent grief with him. Maybe the burden you hold over yourself for so long – the one that you’ve gnawed and scratched and kneeled and digested over – maybe this all consuming shake in your body could use some pre-written and pre-determined accompaniment.

He doesn’t say anything. Whatever his script is, he doesn’t follow it. Maybe its his silence that speaks more about you than you could fathom for yourself. He carries out your grief and takes it for what it is – the proof of all of your love. He carries it out in his eyes, in his hand that is calloused because of words he hesitates to speak and carries in his fist, hidden behind his back. Only now, hes thankful for this silence. You understand it better than anyone, he thinks.

The big block letters in all caps overweigh the desperate letter you wrote to yourself when you were thirteen. He shift beside you, HIS ARM IS AROUND YOUR SHOULDERS AND HE’S HUGGING YOU NOW and youre  a little hopeful now. Youre a little hopeful that your longing has a partner. That your teeth can still be capable of letting go. That your tongue is capable of saying “thank you,” muttered against the warmth of his chest and his too-weak left side that carries his heart flutters against itself and he’s glad for how weak his left side is. He’s glad he feels your words ten times over because of it.

Whatever this script is, whatever dialogues are written and edited and predetermined are either being fulfilled or being gone against. You don’t care. You have the time to read it later. You have the choice to never read it ever again.

He holds you. your words don’t muffle because he hears you.

He hears you, and this is not a compulsion. Its not written in the script, no, loving you has always meant breaking the rules, loving you has always meant going against the forces of the nature that shaped you. jean didn’t seem to care much for rules, anyway.

[1ore]

Scuttling into ur askbox like a little beetle

i think i recall you reblogging/posting things about geography and culture + human effect on it - I vaguely recall a piece of art where it showed a blurred out, cropped piece of people fighting, and focused instead on the flora in the scene.

ANYWAY! getting back on track. seeing that piece inspired me to take a course this semester called "people and the land: cultural geography". and the whole reason I came to your askbox was to ask if you had any suggested reading materials? We'll get stuff in class ofc, but I am curious to see if there's any bias of materials on the prof's side vs someone else.

Phew that was a long ask. thank you o/!

That sounds like Liz Anna Kozik’s piece : D So happy it stuck with you! I love her work!!

As for your ask, what an awesome class! Land-human relationships are my bullshit, and I really enjoyed my own cultural geography class.

Thinking back on my schooling, I would say about 70% of my classes fell in with the “everything is awful and humans are the worst” narrative, and the other 30% made time for land-human relationships other than the extractive hellscape that most people currently live under. So, full disclosure, when I think of “bias,” that’s what I think of. You grow up in the miasma, it’s hard to imagine that there’s any other way of living. It’s also hard to say without knowing the professor, but I think, in general, it’s good to be mindful of who is or isn’t telling the story.

ANYWAY. All that in mind, here’s some articles about people-land relations that I think are neat:

The Environment and Society portal - I like their digital exhibits especially. I remember enjoying Oceans in Three Paradoxes and The Northwest Passage. Great place to wander around and pick a random article that catches your eye.

Of Deserts and Decolonization: Dispelling Myths About Drylands – obligatory desert propaganda. An article looking at how colonial mindsets about deserts disrupt existing relationships and hurt both people and land, and also how those attitudes shape environmentalism/conservation/etc. still today.

The Miracle of the Commons – lovingly challenging the Tragedy of the Commons with a creative solution to poaching and human-animal conflict in South Africa, Zimbabwe, and Namibia. Great article to sit in discomfort about (productively!)

Biodiversity: The Variety of Life that Sustains Our Own – Contains one of my go-to examples when explaining how humans can be good for land and biodiversity, the story of Quitobaquito Springs (and its sister spring Ki:towak, though the author doesn’t mention it here.)

The Environmental History Timeline - just fun to look at, especially the further you go back. It’s funny to spot where a young branch of history is trying *really hard* to reframe how academia thinks about the past, by bringing the invisible landscape forward:

2700 BCE —  Epic of Gilgamesh describes vast tracts of cedar forests in what is now southern Iraq. Gilgamesh defies the gods and cuts down the forest, and in return the gods say they will curse Sumeria with fire (or possibly drought). By 2100 BCE, soil erosion and salt buildup have devastated agriculture. One Sumerian wrote that the “earth turned white.” Civilization moved north to Babylonia and Assyria. Again, deforestation becomes a factor in the rise and subsequent fall of these civilizations. (Perlin, 1991). 2700 BC — Some of the first laws protecting the remaining forests are decreed in Ur, Messopotamia. (Grove, 1995).

^^^ fucking around and finding out forever and ever and ever.