#was it really just because i wasn't dating people i actively chose

[genderfluid-druid]

dropping thoughts like laundry into the aromanticism washing machine and watching them spin. taking little notes in a fancy journal titled "greyro??" and crossing them out, but then going back and scribbling an addendum. holding up an extravagant glass beaker full of a cool bubbling potion and peering at it through safety glasses that say "mind the amatonormativity!"

[gguk-n]

Can you please write second change romance with Lando where reader tells him "Love me. chose me. for once in your damned life, fight for me!"

Reader is working at sky sports as a journalist. I hope you like it. I hope I did it justice.

Track of the Heart

{Reader's POV}

I knew the world was a small place and some times you run into people you are actively trying to avoid. For me, that was Lando Norris.

We were both young and in love. He was my first serious adult relationship. I loved him deeply; if you asked drunk me, I'd probably say that I still love him. But that was the past. He broke up with me because his fans didn't like me. The hate had gotten to the point that I had stopped using my phone except to call or text my friends and family and Lando knew. I had told him through tears about all the mean things people said about me. Part of me hoped that he would tell them off for it but what I didn't expect was for him to disregard it and let it get so bad that even at races people would name call me, even in front of Lando and he would do nothing. It affected my health, my mental peace and my studies. So, I did what was best for me; walked away.

That was 3 years ago. Right now I was standing face to face with the man that broke my heart. I knew when I applied for a position at Sky Sports that I would run into Lando. Luckily, I had stayed clear of him for the year that I had interned there; by only going to cover other sports and minor leagues. Today, the team was short staffed, they needed someone to help make the scripts and organise the cue cards, so they brought along a couple new hires. I did everything in my power to evade the race because it would mean being stuck on an F1 venue for a whole weekend with my ex. My direct superior wouldn't listen to any of my crap, as he put it and told me to pack my stuff and to meet him at the venue.

So here I was, awkwardly standing, in front of the supposed love of my life. He looked shocked to see me before his eyes flickered to the Sky Sports entry pass, as if a switch flipped. He smiled and greeted; "You're finally a sports journalist, like you always wanted to be. Congratulations" he said while raising his hand to shake mine. Out of courtesy, I moved all the files in my hands to my left and shook his hand. "My colleagues were saying you had your maiden win this season, so Congratulations I guess." I retorted. I adjusted the files in my hands, almost dropping one, which Lando quickly caught with his hand. I thanked him and left to see the team with all my files.

{Lando's POV}

Her hands were still soft like I remembered them with a sweet tinge of vanilla, her favourite body lotion. She had coloured her hair recently and she looked so much more professional and put together then I remembered. I guess it comes with the job. Hearing her congratulate me felt like home even if it felt like it was laced with sarcasm, like the only thing that ever mattered. How did I even celebrate a race without her? She was still clumsy I thought as I caught the file she almost dropped. The weekend just got more eventful I thought as she walked away.

--------------------------------------------------------

{Reader's POV}

If there is one thing I will advice you is that don't be a hard worker especially in a situation if it will land you working with your ex for the whole year. One of the members from the F1 team went on maternity leave and she spoke so highly of me that I ended up working on the races till she returned. Now to my horror, all the fans still remembered me. Even after 3 years, they did not hesitate to start up rumours about me and Lando being together and that we never really broke up and it was all a publicity stunt. I had to speak to my bosses to let them know that all of that was in the past and that I wasn't dating him anymore; they didn't care unless it affected my work.

Working at the paddock wasn't easy and Lando didn't make it any easier. He acted like a menace before and after interviews especially if I was around. Sometimes I wanted to strangle him.

{Lando's POV}

Being around her reminded me why I had fallen in love with her in the first place. She brought the idiotic side of me out. "Mate, you need to stop annoying Y/N. She'll strangle you one day." Carlos said while they were on the drivers parade. "She wouldn't. There's a reason she's tolerating me." I said. "Yeah, sky sports pays her to do her job." Carlos laughed. Part of me wanted to believe that she tolerated me because she still loved. But I knew that was selfish of me, since the reason we broke up lay heavily on me.

This made me want to be closer to her. I guess proximity made the heart softer. I found myself bringing her snacks or treats during her long days. Slowly but surely I found myself back in her arms. We didn't out right say it, but we were dating each other. She made the weekends even more enjoyable. It was exhilarating to be running around trying not to get caught; until we did get caught. It was like a switch flipped inside her and she stopped seeing me.

{Reader's POV}

The gifts and the sneaking away and having someone care for me got to me. Before I knew it I was back in Lando's arms. I knew getting back together with Lando was a bad idea. All my suspicions were confirmed when a picture of us leaving together from a club in Las Vegas made rounds. The hate was worse then before; it's like they forgot there was a person behind it all. I couldn't even shut off social media because of my work. I didn't want to be seen with him anymore; I was going to stop reporting for F1 and live my life covering other sports. Hopefully they didn't find me there. Lando was still persistent even after I had stopped talking to him and cut him off.

"Babe, you gotta stop running away from me." Lando spoke cornering me, out of breath from the running. "I have work to do, if you'll excuse me Mr Norris." I said. "Since, when was I Mr Norris?" He questioned. "Since a while, I never should've gotten back with you." I declared. "You don't mean that." Lando stammered. "Actually I do." saying that broke my heart because deep down I loved him but it didn't feel like he loved me. "But I love you. Don't you love me?" he asked. "It doesn't matter what I feel, when you'll never reciprocate it." I pointed out. "What do you mean?" he pleaded. "Lando, the exact reason we broke up was because you couldn't stick up for me. I knew you and yet I got myself involved in this." I sighed. "But, baby I need you." he voiced. I laughed, there were tears in my eyes, "Not enough to stick up for me." "What's gotten into you?" Lando probed. "Nothing's gotten into me, I should've stayed away from you. Your fans hate me, they always have. They want me fired; did you know that?" I asked. Lando was at a loss for words.

"You know when we broke up I wanted you to want me. But you love your fans more." I commented. "It's not like that I love you more, I missed you a lot after we broke up." he said. "Not enough to clear the air anyways." I voiced out. "What do you want me to do?" Lando asked trying to reach for my hands. "Love me, choose me. For once in your damned life, fight for me. If you really want me you'll do something, or you can watch me walk away for the second time." I stated while turning on my heels and leaving.

I did not expect Lando to do what he did next. He made a statement on every social media account of his, even Quadrants; it read-

Hi guys, Lando here. I would like to let you all know that I love Y/N Y/L/N who is currently working for Sky Sports F1. We used to date a few years ago but we broke up because of my foolishness. Fate gave me another chance and I don't want to blow it. If any of you have any issue with her, keep it to yourself. Because she is here to stay for as long as she will have me. Kindly refrain from sending her any hate if you love and support me. If you do send hate, I will be forced to take legal action to protect the love of my life.

I was sat in shock reading the statement. I can already imagine the train wreck McLaren PR must be in. I was pulled out of my thoughts by a knock on my door. I opened it to find a sweaty Lando with a big bouquet of flowers, chocolates and a couple gift bags. "I know this isn't a lot, but this is a start. Let me apologise. I'm sorry for all the hurt I caused you. Please take me back." he said with tears in his eyes. I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I love you too Lando Norris." I declared. Lando dropped all the stuff on the ground and wrapped his arms around me. "I won't let you down, I promise." he said. "I'll hold you to it." I said. "You can hold it against me for the rest of our lives." he told. "I don't think you want me that long." I laughed. He broke our embrace to cup my cheeks, "I'll have you as long as you'll let me stay." and pressed a kiss against my lips. "I think I'll like to have you inside for now." I said while pulling him in and closing the door.

[emelinstriker]

{Special Stranger} Nezha ♡ Pumpkin Carving

Art drawn by me + the AU itself is mine.

Very much rushed drabble and art just because I wanted to get this out in time for Halloween. So it's meh towards the end.

[TL;DR] The inside joke headcanon of Nezha being way too skilled at things shows.

♡ ~ Fluff ~ ♡

It was October and Halloween was fast approaching. And while it wasn't the first Halloween you were celebrating with your boyfriend, it was the first time you had a special activity planned.

And after several hours of work, Nezha finally returned home, clearly exhausted. He probably had to deal with a lot of unruly people again. You smiled softly as you greeted him from the kitchen door. "Welcome home!"

At the sound of your voice, his mood seemed to change. Nezha's exhaustion seemed to fade for even just a moment as he approached you. He pulled you closer, leaned in, and gave you a gentle kiss before pulling away. "It's good to be home." That's when he looked down and noticed you wearing an apron with a cute pumpkin on it. He raised an eyebrow as he comments, "New apron?"

You nodded happily, humming in confirmation. "I also got you one so we can match for the pumpkin carving!"

His eyes widened a little in realization as he pursed his lips. "Oh shit- That was today? I'm so sorry, blossom- I should've come home earlier", he groans a little, annoyed at himself for having forgotten.

You leaned in and kissed his cheek. "It's absolutely fine, honey. I figured you wouldn't be home until late in the afternoon. So I already got everything ready for us." You reassured before you lead him towards the kitchen, where you had already set up the table. There were also the pumpkins the two of you picked the week prior.

Nezha glanced at the table as he let out a chuckle. "Man, all these things you do for me... Sometimes I really feel like I don't deserve yo-"

You quickly shut him up with another kiss on the lips. "Shush, love. You absolutely deserve me. And I'm lucky to have you in return."

He quickly melted into the kiss before eventually pulling away with a smile, releasing a breath he didn't know he was holding. He wanted to keep up the banter with you, but he knew you had a date involving carving pumpkins. The affectionate banter would have to wait until later.

You handed him his matching apron so he could put it on, before sitting down at the table next to him. He had carved a few pumpkins before to entertain some children from time to time, but he never got to actually play around with the design much. After all, detailed carvings weren't easy for children, so he used big openings for simple smiley faces whenever he taught them how to do it.

During your date, he decided to be a lot more ambitious though, just to test his own skills and impress you. All the while you kept trying to take glances at what design he chose. However, everytime he noticed you trying to take a peek in a not so subtle way, he gently shoo'd you back to your own side of the table. A lot of laughter was involved in your attempts to take a look and him trying to push you away to keep it a surprise.

You could tell he had fun as he seemed quite focused on whatever he was working on. Meanwhile you were struggling just a little with the more detailed parts of your own work. It took a while, but eventually the two of you were done. And as a little test and surprise, you placed one candle into each pumpkin. Once Nezha lit them up, you turned off the lights.

You couldn't help but stare in awe at his pumpkin's design illuminated by the candle. It seemed very detailed for the short amount of time you've spent on carving. It looked like a faceless image of yourself holding a lotus flower in your hands. The sight of him having created something so much better than yours made you feel a bit insecure as he eagerly looked at your pumpkin. While your own carving wasn't all that bad, it was rather simple and the detailed parts clearly didn't have the cleanest lines. But that didn't matter to him as he proceeded to compliment your work.

The rest of the evening was overall relaxing as you and your boyfriend decided to just watch movies and cuddle on the couch.

[ Masterlist ]

[meraki-yao]

Watching Agatha All Along again after giving up on Marvel for three years made me think about why I gave it up in the first place.

I was so deep in the MCU. I cried so much during Infinity War that I struggled to walk out of the cinema. I watched Endgame on the first day that it was released. My diary was a CACW notebook. Part of the reason I took up STEM subjects was because of Marvel.

And then after watching MoM in theatres, I stopped.

I'm trying to phrase and figure out what made me give up something I was so invested in, something I loved so much. I think I know why.

The MCU period I was active in gave me characters that I ended up loving, and the later period took them away.

My two favourite characters were ruined. Their character arcs and core characters undone. I'm worried about my favourite too.

I hate it when the sequel undermines the previous works.

When I think of Steve Rogers, I don't think of the guy who chose to either fuck up the entire timeline of the MCU or sat quietly and watch the world in turmoil, his allies die tragically, and his best friend left to a fate worst than dead to get with a girl he wasn't even dating, a woman who had a life of her own and moved on.

I think of Steve from CATWS, the guy from Brooklyn who still does the right thing in a time when morals are blurred. The Steve who is kind, compassionate and brave. The Steve who inspired the base-level employees of SHEILD to follow his example and not bow down in the face of tyranny. The Steve who just had one mission, and that was standing up to bullies.

When I think of Wanda, I don't think of the insane, manic witch/evil goddess who killed thousands mercilessly even though there was a harmless solution, who after all she lost, somehow only wanted her children who she had for three days instead of also her love and her twin.

I think of Wanda, the girl who lost it all, who's family was all killed, who was denied a burial for Vision, who was left alone and abandoned in the world, with so much love in her heart that no longer had a place, a person to go to. The girl who feels so much so deeply that it bended reality. The girl who had to learn, who had to give up her dream, but did so, because at the end of the day, she is a kind person, who doesn't want to hurt people. She was wrong, she takes time to understand and accept the harm she's caused (as we all do), and then makes it right. She tries to be good. Despite everything, she tries.

The later stages of MCU took these two characters that mean so much to me personally, and ruined them.

And I'm fucking mad at them, because it disrespected all the work that made me love them in the first place, and it was preventable. (The original script for MoM where Wanda helps Strange but repeatedly gets tempted by the Darkhold is a much more convincing narrative.)

And I'd say the same applies to others: Natasha, Thor, Bruce, even Strange (although I feel like they never really figured out what they wanted to do with Strange's character)

I miss my characters, I miss my MCU.

[ilikekidsshows]

Gosh, I just remembered Destruction. That Marinette seriously let Cat Noir run around with the word Dimwit in his bell for all of season 4, never once spared it a single thought, never apologized for it either despite allegedly having "realized" how awfully she treated him, and then smiled proudly when Alya laughed over him behind his back after the Cataclysm incident Marinette just abandoned Cat Noir afterwards too and only cared about herself getting support.

Dude, Marinette is so awful to him at times. Who DOES that to a friend? I would be downright ashamed of myself if I treated a friend like that and the show's telling me to CELEBRATE her for that??

Let's not forget that she also didn't think for months that Cat needs to know beforehand that her secret plan includes him having to run the risk of cataclysming Hawkmoth, or that he's once again reduced to a literal object in her plan who can't even breath with the villain's hand at his throat because all she deemed important was HERSELF being fine and safe and getting the Kwamis back.

Sure, just demand that of him on a whim. It's fine, girl, as long as it isn't you, right?

She also put every single civilian at Hawkmoth’s mercy in her plan, apparently just counties on him to be decent to the helpless civilians in his path who are even BOTHERING HIM with photos for her plan to work. That makes her such an awful hero. Humanity really was non existent in her plan, huh? Only she herself and the Kwamis mattered and she even monologued that into a full-blown failure. Not even getting a single Kwami because she had to brag about how much smarter and better she is than him. Such heroism. Much inspirational.

I seriously forgot how awful Destruction was for Marinette’s character. What the shit was that??

---

The group chat and I have been thinking that Marinette really is the least heroic “superhero” we’ve seen that wasn't a purposeful attempt at deconstructing superheroes. She very rarely goes out of her way to help people except when it's her way of forcing her views on what people need on others (think Guilt Trip), and a lot of the time she only fights Akumas and Sentimonsters because they're getting in the way of her plans for the day.

Marinette is only a hero technically, because, technically, he does stop the bad guys from getting what they want. But she also does the bare minimum needed. She magicked together a charm to try to prevent Akumatizations four seasons in, and it was basically because Alya told her to. She is also completely disinterested in finding out who Hawk Moth is. Félix spelled it out for her and she couldn't be arsed to do anything about it. The only time she's confronted Gabriel about anything was when she wanted to get his permission to date Adrien. I repeat: the only reason Marinette ever “goes after” Gabriel is to get his permission to date Adrien. The finale confrontation was an accident on her part. Marinette's motives are so often about herself over everything else. It's not just that there's a benefit to her in helping others, it's that she actually thinks about herself first in every single situation and anyone else is barely ever a consideration.

Marinette is the most passive hero I’ve seen. Even early series Usagi from Sailor Moon, who cried at the thought of fighting monsters, actively followed rumors around town to uncover the villains’ schemes and more often than not got involved in the plot of the episode because she met a random stranger she wanted to help when they explained their problems to her and/or asked for her assistance with something. Marinette has helped a random stranger only once, despite her supposedly having this trait being why Fu chose her in Origins.

She really has no idea what a hero is, considering her idea for doing a heroic act to celebrate “heroes’ day” was promising her parents would make a bunch of treats for her classmates instead of herself doing anything to help anyone. She only ended up making the treats herself because her parents didn't have the time, and even then, the classmates also pitched in to make her idea/heroic act happen. Despite Hawk Moth being a consistent threat, she's not proactive in trying to stop him, only patrolling for personal reasons, like keeping the principal from making “real heroes” (her words, not mine) look bad and going on “not dates” with Cat Noir.

She also far more frequently uses her powers for personal gain than any other character that gets a Miraculous, even when taking their time using one into account. Marinette uses her powers to sabotage people who have a crush on the guy she likes, embarrass people she doesn't like and manufacture situations where she can get closer to her crush. Meanwhile Adrien and Alya *flips through notes* genuinely enjoy being a hero and helping people, so much so they joke on the job. And people tell me the latter two are less heroic, because of some twisted idea that real heroes are the ones for whom the job is a burden. In actuality, Marinette viewing her heroics as such a burden makes her unmotivated and a worse hero for it. Her disregard towards civilians and her allies when she actually bothers to do the job is just another sign of how utterly unsuited to be a hero Marinette is.

Frankly, if Marinette’s hijinks didn't stop the Akumas and Sentimonsters, she'd be a villain protagonist. Because of the retooled show enforcing Marinette’s unheroic traits, her lack of motivation, her lack of sympathy for others, her selfishness and her self-aggrandizing, I personally feel that she still is a villain protagonist but the show just celebrates her instead of condemning her.

[liesmyth]

Further to Keeley saying yes to marrying Roy (definitely agree), how much would Roy only be asking because he thinks that's what you do. Like he's retired, he's forty, and all his former teammates are married/have kids. He's a traditional guy (kind of) - would he have waited for them to have been together for two years (or whatever) and then proposed because that's the next step?

Context: this is a follow-up to this 'unpopular opinion meme' ask where I said that (to me, etc) Keeley would've said yes if Roy ever asked her to marry him post S2.

In general, I just looove to overthink gender roles and performative heterosexuality with these characters, because the mix of sports series + juicy queer dynamics is like catnip to my brain — so thank you for this ask so I can ramble about it some more!

The thing is. I think Roy's actually not very traditional for a footballer (let alone a very famous one) simply because he's close to forty and he's never been married and doesn't have kids. Like, genuinely, that makes him a huge oddity in his set. If I were applying RL football logic to the football show that plays fast and loose with realism, I'd say that there must be a lot of speculation in-universe that Roy is gay. OR maybe he's had so many public short-term flings that there's only a little speculation — but there would still be people thinking it's strange. Just because "WAG and kids" is such a big aspect of how football stars are expected to perform masculinity, and Roy not having any of that (while at the same time performing a very specific brand of 'old school' tough guy masculinity) would make him a weird anomaly.

(When talking to non-sports fans, I usually find it useful to compare pro athletes to active-duty military personnel as two categories that on average start a family very young. It's a mix of a family providing more stability in a hectic career + expectations in those circles because everyone else is doing it + financial reasons that mean is more convenient to do it now than to wait)

(Again. Reflecting on social norms in footballers' circles makes me think a lot about what Keeley's expectations might have been pre-S1, when she kept dating footballers and moving in those same circles, whether the fact that she was with a young guy at 30 bothered her more than she let on, etc etc. This is also part of why I think she absolutely would say yes if Roy proposed — see also her reaction to Shandy saying that all their former flatmates "married footballers", which is just like "yeah, fair enough". I think pre-season 3 she just never saw her life going in a different direction, and was fine with it — at least until S3 made her consider stuff she might not have otherwise)

Anyway SORRY I went off!! Back to Roy — all that ramble was to say that, TO ME, if he wanted to be married, he absolutely would be already, way before the show started. It's something he must have considered earlier in life, just because it's a staple of the Ideal Footballer Career Path, and for whatever reason decided he wasn't keen on it. And it wasn't a one-off earlier — it's something people would have commented on it over and over, as all his teammates started families and he didn't, as the tabloid press speculated on his private life. It's not that he never had the opportunity; it's that he actively chose not to. So I'm not sure retirement would necessarily be the thing that makes him decide that "it's time" to get married. We see that in S2 he really throws himself into ~playing house~ with Keeley because he's trying to find a new life anchor after retirement, but idk if that would necessarily translate, to him, into "next step is getting married." Because, for someone in Roy's position, getting married would have been "the next step" ten years ago, and he was like, nah!

I also think that "when will Roy and Keeley get married" WAS an expectation that was very much present in the eyes of everyone who interacts with them, at least from the moment it became clear that they were serious and basically living together. Tabloid speculation, old friends of Roy who're also retired, friends and acquaintances of Keeley who also move in those 'D-list celebs / influencers / WAG' kind of circles. Their families, even; I have a very elaborate headcanon built off that one (1) throwaway line that Roy wanted to open the champagne when Keeley's mum "moved back north", that maybe Keeley's mother was a bit too happy to see her settled down with an older man for once, and they're living together, and he's very famous and very rich. My other headcanon is that Keeley dropped Shandy / her old friends after she got with Roy partly because there'd have been some wink-wink-nudge from those corners about "landing Roy Kent" (I have WAY too many thoughts about Keeley and Shandy, lol).

...Anyway. This is all to say. I think, between the two of them, Keeley might have been the one who vaguely considered that maybe marriage could be on the horizon as a next step, because she's a woman over 30 in circles where women over 30 get reminded of these things. Roy has the luxury of thinking about it less, because he decided years before the show that he wasn't going to get pressured into an early marriage just because it's The Done Thing.

I can believe Keeley and Roy never discussed marriage all through the year-odd they were dating, but I bet multiple people brought it up to Keeley unprompted, and to Roy also but to a lesser extent, and he was able to shrug it off way more easily. Keeley is probably dodging old friends who text her happy birthday and then are like "how are things going with RoyKent(TM)??" wink. babe you landed the big fish!! etc. etc.

SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG! this is like 80% headcanons that's partly inspired by me being A Sports Fan, partly by me overthinking Keeley's narrative, especially in S1 and S2 when she was still allowed to have neuroses and a meaningful friendship with Rebecca. But I'm ALWAYS thinking about Roy/Keeley not only as a ship but also in the context of the very specific gendered dynamics that exist among top-flight footballers and their partners, especially in the UK. It's just anthropologically fascinating to me, and I think S1 especially does a very good job of hinting at all the various nuances with Keeley's character.

[christinem999]

I know this sounds very chronically online but like I'm so disappointed in Joseph rn.

I would've been happy if he dated literally anyone else but he chose DOJA? The self-hating mixed girl who doesn't even claim her black side, degrades her own race and is still in those racist chatrooms, defended her ex boyfriend who SA'd someone and he ended up admitting to it along with Doja attacking any person who talked about it, and is one of the most ungrateful artists on the platform.

This is just so disappointing. Honestly thought he was better than this but I guess not.

I've been a fan since 2022 and this is really warping how I see him as a person.... He has the right to date anyone he wants but really what does this say about him as a person if he is actively choosing to be with Doja...

Honestly me too

I'm disappointed and a little angry that he's seemingly looking past all her actions and for what? So he can get some?

Like on one hand, I want to believe it's PR and all those people just trying to take the "guitar playing metalhead guy off of that one Netflix show" title off him. And that he's just acting, literally acting as in his job, unbothered in those photos and videos. But on the other...well, you know.

Its all so disappointing because he was one of the good ones that kept his record clean, and now this is happening and after all that work to keep a good reputation, silence? Really?

And it's not like he doesn't know about how everyone feels about this. His insta comments have made him well-aware if he wasn't before of all those disgusting things she's done, and the article on British Vogue mentions it too, though when he says "I've been away for a month, they're all very cross with me", they literally try to word it like he's talking about his fucking plants.

Like you cannot work this hard to keep your reputation good then throw it to shit and say what, a sentence about it in an interview? Hardly that.

Obviously he's a grown man and can do what he wants, but when that whatever you want is dating someone like Doja Cat, fuckin DOJA CAT?? Grown ass man or not, those actions will have consequences and you will have to deal with them.

I haven't made a post talking about it cuz I don't want people to call me chronically online, which I assume is the reason you sent anonymously (?) but there's my two cents on it.

[accidentalmistress]

Sorta snz, mostly just kink ramblings.

I went to my first munch last night, which is a type of casual social event that started off as a BDSM community thing, but which now has some overlap in the general kink and polyamory communities. They are completely vanilla events, just a way to meet other people in the local community. I found the event through FetLife, which I am not very active on but happened to log into while battling insomnia in the early hours of Saturday morning.

It was a board game night at the gaming store we just happen to go to on Tuesdays for board game night (they do board game events several nights every week). To be clear, the game store was hosting a normal, vanilla game night, and the FetLife group chose it as the location for the munch. The store had nothing to do with the munch itself and likely didn't even know that the group was anything but a normal friend group playing games.

I initially wanted to go because my husband has been having a really rough time connecting with anyone on dating apps, so I was hoping that an in-person event might work out better, but I ended up being the only femme person there 🙃

It definitely felt kinda awkward sitting there as the only female-presenting person in this group of dudes who could, if they hadn't already, look up my FetLife profile from the list of attendees at any time and find out what gets my rocks off 😣

It wasn't a bad experience per se, but it also wasn't what either of us was hoping for. We may try a different one next month which is a little further away distance-wise but seems to draw a larger crowd. That one's also at a coffee shop, which we both think is a better setting for chatting and getting to know people than playing a competitive game at a larger vanilla game event.

(To make things even more awkward and uncomfortable, and because I never get to have fun reactions to anything, the dude sitting next to me was wearing this really cloying fragrance, and by the end of the night I felt like I couldn't get a full breath because my chest was so damned tight 😭 No reaction in my nose whatsoever. It's like the universe said, "You wanted sneezing? Oh, we thought you said wheezing. Sorry, no takebacksies.")

[natandacat]

The notes are so funny bc here are the 'downsides of being an only child' that are literally not unique to being an only child and more of a parenting/situational thing really:

- "It's lonely!/Siblings are built-in friends!" One of my brothers played with me out of a sense of necessity because we were not allowed to be with other kids and he deeply resented me for that, which made for a bad relationship and me being extremely alone all the time anyway. I'd rather have skipped the hatred (on his part) and heart break (on mine) and gone directly to playing alone. I have literally never had an intimate conversation with any of my 3 brothers (except literally One time with one of them) but I've had countless of horrid fights (with me or witnessed). Hell is other people, etc.

- "All the attention is suffocating!" I was monitored 24/7 and pretty much never left alone, up to a point where my bathroom time was also monitored. My brother actively and voluntarily participated in the monitoring at some points.

- "You get unconditional support as an adult!" I've been in a lot of trouble since I was 17 and they've never helped, not materially or emotionally.

-"You have more people to build happy memories with!" My brother got married 3 days before I was back in the country (he set the date way after I had bought my plane tickets and also he actively chose to hide it from me) and still blames me for being upset because "it was a ceremony for closed loved ones only anyway" (I guess I wasn't counted!). That's just the most egregious examples in a long, long list.

I get grass is greener ect but what bothers me is that it reinforces the idea that sibling relationships are *always* a net positive, in a very "nuclear family is sacred" way

Like I'm not venting for the sake of it, I've been no contact for 4 years and it's great, I'm just frustrated that it's so goddamn hard to get people to acknowledge sibling abuse, or even get them to *not* perform shocked incredulity at the idea. Especially on tumblr, THE website where people talk about parental abuse all the time and understand that sometimes you really cannot salvage the relationship and it truly is detrimental

All I'm saying is stop assuming that things would be better with a sibling around. You don't know that! Believe me, things could be so much worse with a sibling around.

The good news is you get to choose your friends and siblings as an adult! :) Life can be sweet not matter who your nuclear family is! You're not a failure for not experiencing the hegemonic ideal of siblinghood! It's okay!

[hello-nichya-here]

Since you're the MJ expert, I have a question for you about a thing that's been confusing me. You said he was a shy guy that wasn't comfortable getting too explicitly sexual and didn't like how his brothers treated the women they slept with, but that he also flirted with fans and the In The Closet video is just him getting it on with a model. Was he really not okay with that kind of stuff or did he just say so because he didn't want another stain on his reputation?

I am far from an expert, but let's hope I can help you understand it better.

The part involving the fans is kind of comparing apples to oranges.

Michael didn't like being forced to hear/see his brothers having sex with fans in the same room he had to share with them, not just because he was a kid (raised by a VERY religious mother) but also because who the hell wants to be in that situation? It's awkward and kinda gross at best, and a severe violation of boundaries at worse.

And Michael's disaproval of how his brothers behaved wasn't just about the sex itself - it was about his brother's spying on women to see them undress without their consent, or ignoring a girl's discomfort when she wasn't fully okay with having sex next to a 7-year-old, or taking a fan's virginity and then IMMEDIATELY kicking her out of the room and telling her to never try looking for them again, or treating the girls so poorly Michael was scared they had been raped.

This is all very different from cheeky flirting and taking a fan's number - which was the level of flirting Michael was comfortable with, at least on camera. And considering all the women that were involved with Michael at some point, some of which were not exactly on good terms with him after it, not once ever described him being disrespectful or cruel like his brothers, and claim that he was indeed shy and VERY insecure but did still like to flirt, I'd say neither one nor the other was an act for the cameras.

Plus, there's the obvious factor of "A 40-year-old man that has actually flirted, dated, slept with women and has been married and divorced twice is not gonna behave the same way as a child/teenager that is constantly being forced into situations he has repeatedly said he is not comfortable with (be it dealing with relatives that are having sex with someone literally right next to him, or being locked in a room with two prostitutes because some weird adults having a problem with a 15-year-old boy being a virgin)"

But you are correct for assuming some of Michael's public behavior was based on him (and his managers) wanting to have more control over his image and wanting people to see him as something not fully accurate to the real MJ - you just picked the wrong part of his behavior to question, because the shyness was always genuine, but the sexual stuff sometimes wasn't.

Michael had been target of gay rumors for a LONG time - from the mid 70s till today. And while nowadays an artist being gay, or at least seen as such, would not be a big deal, back then it was a scandal - and Michael had been getting labeled as a bad influence by some conservatives because of his "ambiguous/feminine/androgynous look."

The Bad Era was him starting to embrace a more edgy, masculine, very clearly straight and sexually active persona - they even chose the girl for the "The Way You Make Me Feel" video based on the fact that Michael thought she was hot and she had a major crush on him. He was still supposed to be single, to avoid ruining the fans dream that one of them could totally be his wife someday, but he was now not just allowed to desmontrate interest in women, he had to prove said interest did in fact exist.

The Dangerous Era was supposed to be the follow up to that - and "In The Closet", which is about a secret affair, was originally meant to be a duet between him and Madonna of all people, but that ended up not happening because:

1 - She was FAR more comfortable with being VERY explicit in her lyrics and videos than he was.

2 - She wanted to toy with the "In The Closet" concept, by presenting as male while Michael would present as female - which was the exact opposite of what MJ wanted, since the ironic name of the song is a very clearly meant to subvert the public's expectation that at any second Michael would be coming out as not straight.

3 - Their personalities did not mesh at all, and Michael genuinely did not like Madonna.

When that plan was scrapped, they went for a different approach, that would be faking the "reveal" of a secret, scandalous affair between Michael and the girl that provided the vocals for the song, with "In The Closet" sort of being the "couple's" response to the media speculation - but that idea also ended up not being used.

So, they settled for Michael just picking a model he liked, and the two of them having fun on camera - and even though Michael enjoyed hanging out, working and flirting with Naomi, he also said, in a private conversation with a friend that he had no idea was being recorded, that he did not like doing the more explicit parts of the video, and some scenes (like her basically grinding on his lap) ended up being cut.

He was also NOT happy about how the crew kept telling the girl to get more aggressive and touch him more despite not wanting to because Michael was repeatedly saying to everyone present that he wasn't comfortable with that (seriously, IMAGINE the outrage a situation like that, with the genders reversed, would cause today).

Then the disaster happened. The false accusations of child molestation were all over the media, and the gossip went from "Hahaha, is MJ a faggot?" to "Should he be in jail forever?"

From that moment on, whatever privacy Michael was still desperately holding onto went right out the window. His relationship with Lisa Marie Presley became public, as well as the fact that he had been making moves on her while she was still with her first husband, and the two of them were repeatedly asked "Okay, but do you guys actually fuck?" and very much not believed each time they confirmed it.

Their messy divorce, Michael's second marriage (that was all about him getting to be a dad, with the wife not even living with him and the kids), and their on-again-off-again affair/relationship during said marriage was also very public.

So while I do think Michael's cheeky flirting with fans later in life was genuine, just like his first marriage, it's pretty clear that there's a reason everyone suddenly got to take a look at his private life - it was further proof of his innocence.

[auburnitzy]

Idk if anyone has ever told you this but I am stupidly excited every time you post something abt Nawa

I was never exposed to Filipino Mythology as often like Greek or Chinese. It kind of made me lose touch with the mythology my mom grew up on.

So seeing your character and the mythology she’s based off of really got me going to get into Filipino creatures :^D

aha!! same!! i don't really see much media of philippine mythology outside of the country, and i didn't want to accidentally offend people when i make a chinese oc because i made a mistake

below the (read more) option is some concepts and early designs of nawa!! (mostly me just rambling ab nawa's history as a character)

february 2022, the earliest known design of her was made in gacha club.

she wasn't filipino yet (chinese-japanese actually) and was named "yurei zhou"

i didn't even bother researching the last name because i was that ignorant.

we don't talk about this era because i am ashamed of it. what an embarrassing time.

if anyone is reading this i'm sorry for doing that :(

this was created march 4, 2022 according to my ibispaint x files, and is the very first naotian/lunarnoodles art i made.

by this time, i was simping for mk because i loved dorks (and still do to this day)

back then, she didn't really wear the sleeveless turtleneck thing, it was a black turtleneck dress (WITH SLEEVES!! 🤯) underneath a a short jacket/vest.

her name was also changed to "yue zhou" because at this point, i realized that "why the heck would i name her yurei zhou if i'm not japanese? that's weird."

i also haven't decided whether she was purely filipino or filipino-chinese

she had red shoes and frankly, i don't know why i chose that. honestly it was an eyesore.

next up we got a more-LEGO looking concept (dated march 8, 2022)

her name was changed to nawa (no last name yet), because i realized "wow, i am not chinese either!!" and said "FILIPINOFICATION BEAM ACTIVATE!!! 🇵🇭🇵🇭🇵🇭" and now she's turned fully filipino

for some reason, her horns also changed to black like thoma's from genshin.

by march 30, 2022, her horns had turned to gold with violet edges, with two slits. however, her shoes were still red, and had gold pins on her jacket.

she still had no bell because there was no backstory formed for her at the moment.

october, 2022 came, and i went "ooo i don't wanna misinterpret chinese mythology" so i turned to filipino mythology instead

her backstory used to be something like this;

"chang'e used to be best friends with an ancestor of nawa's (even gave the ancestor the bell as a gift), until that ancestor tried to eat the moon so the celestial realm banished that ancestor inside the bell and was passed down to her descendants. nawa tags along with mk in s3 to return the bell as an apology to chang'e because the ancestor had wanted to apologize and was haunting her descendants to do that for her"

obviously that's not the backstory and plans anymore, and lualhati (the ancestor) was eventually scrapped

her last name, "elyas" was eventually formed and taken from the character "elias" from one of jose rizal's (a hero in philippine history) book's noli me tangere, because at the time, a show called "maria clara at ibarra" aired at october 3, 2022, and i got so hooked on the show that i made her last name elyas.

then february, 2023 came and i was like "my gosh,,, her backstory is garbage,,," and revamped everything.

i wanted her to be more fleshed out, but i still didn't think of a full backstory yet-

and because I was impulsive and not thinking, i still made her a reference

late february, 2022 came and i said "so, she has bakunawa blood, right? why not give her a DRAGON FORM?"

at this point, i made her accidentally kill her sister (she was being silly and goofy guys) (YOU SINK INTO MY CLOTHES 🐺🐺🌙), made her despise her bakunawa heritage after that and gave her trauma (because that builds character!!!)

i also made her mother (who was originally kind in the fanfiction) into someone who blames her for her sister's death and be the one to give her the bell

and now we land here, early march of 2023, so i said "what if she actually recovered from that trauma i gave her? 👉🏽👈🏽 and what can i do to make her more associated with the moon?"

so the idea of mk helping her heal and love all of herself and her "imperfections" was born!!

(according to the wiki, mk thinks that there is perfection in imperfection, goofy lil dude <33)

her hair turned white because nawa came to love her bakunawa side, and because of that- she became more in tune with haliya's (the filipino moon goddess) side (who loved bakunawa so much to the point that it still resonates through her descendants.)

i also gave her fins, barbels and a tail cuz why not?

of course, her natural hair color is still brown/auburn, but it only appears when she's "de-powered" or something happened to take her powers away (it takes away her bakunawa features too)

and i think that's the stuff i can recall at the moment,,, i'll add more stuff once i remember

[callsign-bunnie]

Hey, uuuhhhhh, can I get a uh GazAlex Date Night Combo? With a side of everything seems to go wrong, hold the angst, add more fluff?

This is the funniest thing I've ever done, I love these asks. I listened to a playlist I have for Gazalex in AAP for this and a song that really fit was Like Real People Do by Hozier

--

Gaz had severe anxiety. This was relevant, he promises. Granted, he'd hid just how bad his anxiety was so he could get into the military, and he continued to hide it but... Well, it still existed.

He'd get severe panic attacks, wake up from nightmares about nothing... Look, if it was a stereotypical symptom, he had it. Even still, he'd never ever been on a level of stress that Alex was actively on.

It'd started with his favorite button-down. Gaz had had it since he was first in the military and he supposed he should have noticed that it was getting kind of tight. Obviously, Gaz had never focused much on bulking and being muscular, just worrying about being able to defend himself, but he'd still bulked a little and he didn't notice that the buttons were wearing down.

So, he'd put it on and twisted to adjust it and the whole damn shirt just fell apart. Honestly, despite it being his favorite, he hadn't even found it that big of a deal! It was just a shirt. Alex? Alex had almost lost his mind.

"Love, I own other shirts." Gaz shook his head, half amused, half worried for his boyfriend, who was going through the closet to find a shirt.

"This one was your favorite though! You wore it more than any of the others and... It's torn to shreds." Alex groaned, shaking his head.

Gaz chuckled, shaking his head in response. "Alex. It's a shirt. Yeah, it was my favorite and I'll probably be upset, later, but I'm more concerned for my boyfriend right now. Come on, I have a green shirt I like, I can just wear that. It'll take over as favorite now that this one is gone, I'm sure." He went into the closet, coming back out with the shirt and shrugging it on.

Alex paused before sighing and nodding. "Right. You're right." He nodded, again. "It's just a shirt."

"Thank you." Gaz smiled. "It's just a shirt."

Alex sighed and nodded. After that, they'd finished getting dressed. They planned to apparently walk to the place Alex had gotten a reservation to, but...

Gaz put his hand out as they stepped outside. This wasn't good. Rain. "Love, did you get an umbrella?"

"What?? Why??" Alex came over. They had an covered entrance for their apartment building, so getting wet wasn't really an issue right now. He groaned when he saw the rain. "Stupid fucking London weather."

"You chose to move here." Gaz reminded, amused again.

Alex shook his head, getting out his phone. "You are the only thing making it worth it, sometimes." He muttered.

Gaz watched him pull up the uber app and he smiled. "See? Not so bad."

Alex gave him a look and Gaz chuckled, again. Poor Alex. He didn't understand why he was getting so stressed out, though! It was just a date and things went wrong all of the time, it would be fine! "Alright, I have one, it should only be a few minutes."

Gaz nodded. "Good. Of course, that does mean we'll be early. Will we be able to get in?"

"Fuck." Alex groaned. "I'll just reschedule it." He shook his head. "What do you want to do in the meantime?"

Gaz hesitated and then shrugged. "We can just wait in the lobby." He smiled, leaning into Alex a little. "Or we can wait right here. The rain is pretty nice to watch."

Alex looked around and then Gaz saw him visibly relax, nodding. "You're right. It is nice to watch." Gaz felt his hand touch his own a moment later and so Gaz gladly accepted it, intertwining their fingers.

However, it appeared God had other plans for where they were waiting, because a moment later, the rain had really started to pick up, and so before Alex could stress again, Gaz tugged him inside, sitting with him in the lobby.

Until, literally the moment they sat down, their uber arrived and Gaz was laughing softly. "Piss poor timing." He commented, getting back up and going out with Alex.

Alex snorted. "I'm just glad it's on time." He muttered, letting Gaz get into the car, first.

The driver was polite enough, which Gaz was appreciative for. He really didn't think Alex was going to be able to handle an asshole well.

He knew it was just because Alex cared a lot about Gaz having a nice time, since Gaz had expressed in the past that he'd never really been on nice dates, so he found it more endearing. It was sweet!

The uber ride happened without incident, which Gaz was completely grateful for, and Alex had seemed to relax as well, which was good. Everything was going to be fine...

"What the fuck do you mean my name is not under a reservation??" Alex asked the host, who looked fairly nervous. "I made it online."

"Yeah, about that... So, we've been having issues with the website lately and..." The host winced. "So, several reservations have been deleted."

"I paid a holding fee!" Alex looked flabbergasted.

Gaz just kind of nudged Alex out of the way. "Look, I'm sorry, but is there anything you can do for us? When is the next available table?"

"Th-the holding fee should be refunded..." The host quickly said. "But, um... due to phone reservations, we won't have a table all night."

"All night?!-"

"That's alright. We get it." Gaz nodded, ignoring Alex. "Thank you for doing what you could." He thanked the host and then turned to Alex, tugging him out. "Come on, I don't really feel like eating there, anyway." Gaz shrugged, linking arms with Alex.

Alex groaned. "Nothing is going right! This is frustrating!"

"It is." Gaz acknowledged. "But... it's okay. Let's get pizza. I like pizza." He pat Alex's arm. "You like pizza."

"I do..." Alex conceded. "Fuck, what would I do without you?"

"Cuss everyone out." Gaz laughed. Since the rain had let up to a light sprinkle, they walked to a pizza place both liked nearby. "See? The rain let up." He said as they arrived.

And, the pizza place was open. More than that, it was where Soap worked when they were all on leave, like they were now. It kept him from being bored.

"Oh! Guys!" Soap grinned when they came in and up to the counter. "Wait-" He paused and then frowned, looking at Alex. "Did he do the thing already?"

Gaz frowned. "The thing-"

"No!" Alex quickly cut him off, looking embarrassed. "Shut up, Soap. He doesn't know what he's talking about." Alex told Gaz, shaking his head.

Gaz didn't believe that for a second, looking at Soap, who was laughing nervously. "The thing?" Soap asked. "I didn't mention a thing."

Gaz glanced between the two of them before narrowing his eyes. Whatever, he wanted pizza. Soap didn't even have to ask them what they wanted, just ringing it up. "Don't worry about paying." Soap waved his hand. "Um... it's on the house."

Gaz relaxed and nodded. "Thanks, Soap. I appreciate it."

"No problem." Soap then grinned at Alex. "Good luck."

Gaz just shook it off, following Alex to a table. "See? The pizza is going fine."

"You're right." Alex nodded, relaxing. He put his hand on the table, clenching it into a fist. So, Gaz took it and rubbed over the knuckles, soothing him. Alex looked at him and then relaxed, shaking his head. "Really. What would I do without you?"

Gaz smiled, flattered. "I'm sure you'd make do."

"I don't want to, though." Alex admitted. "I love you. So much."

"I love you, too." Gaz relaxed and then brought Alex's hand up, kissing his palm. "Come on. Let's enjoy pizza and then go home and cuddle."

Alex nodded. "Alright. Sure." He seemed to relax a bit.

A moment later, their pizza was brought and Gaz happily started to eat, honestly just glad to be on a date with Alex. He loved him so much and he didn't need a fancy restaurant to be happy. He just needed Alex.

When they were done eating, Gaz raised an eyebrow when he watched Alex start to tense again. "Alex, everything is fine. I promise."

"No, no, I know that, I just-" Alex cringed. "Okay, I know you... saw what was going on with Soap and... I don't want to go home without just doing it."

"I... what?" Gaz looked back at Soap, who was watching them with an anxious expression, and he turned back to Alex, confused.

Alex took a deep breath and then he was reaching into his pocket, getting out a little book. Like a very small book. "It's dumb, but I saw it and I knew you'd like it."

Gaz tilted his head. "All this stress about a little trinket?" He was deeply amused, taking it from Alex. "I love it, but I don't think it was worth all of this."

"Just... open it, baby." Alex shook his head.

Gaz raised an eyebrow at him, before opening the book. The first thing he noticed was that a very large rose almost grew before his eyes. It was made of paper, he knew that, but it was still beautiful. And then, a black onyx band with little diamonds set into it was staring right at him.

He paused, eyes wide, and stared at the ring, almost unable to comprehend what it was. "I..."

He looked up, noticing Alex had moved to get down on one knee. "So, I wanted to do this in the other restaurant but... Well, we eat here all the time. I guess it just makes sense." Alex shook his head. "You make me so happy and... I can't imagine going through the rest of my life with anyone else. Please marry me. I don't want to use emotional blackmail, but.. well you saw what it took to get here, today."

Gaz laughed at the joke, his brain finally catching up to the situation. He took the ring out of the box and put it on, noting that it fit perfectly. "So... That's why you were so stressed out?"

Alex's whole body relaxed and he got back up into the chair, looking embarrassed. "Yes. I wanted it all to be perfect and... Everything was going wrong, but... you've been so sweet and I just... I realized I'm not proposing to a date, I'm proposing to you. It doesn't matter where I do it, as long as you say yes."

"I'm saying yes." Gaz assured him, looking over the ring. "Alex... you don't need to stress so much. Any moment with you is perfect, I promise."

"That's what I figured out." Alex nodded. "I love you."

"I love you too..." Gaz melted.

Then, Alex sighed, raising his voice. "Alright, Soap, you can come over, now."

Soap was over within seconds, grinning. Alex shook his head, looking amused. "He's been practically vibrating the entire time."

Gaz laughed. "Thank you, Soap."

"Congratulations, you two! Lang may yer lum reek!" Soap grinned.

Gaz didn't bother to ask for a translation, just thanking Soap again. "I guess we'll have to have a little announcement party."

"I hope it goes better than the engagement." Alex groaned.

Soap again congratulated them and then Gaz decided to go home, for those cuddles that had been promised before and maybe something more, he'd decide when he got there.

The rain was completely clear, leaving a beautiful night view, which Gaz enjoyed, walking with Alex, their hands intertwined. God, he loved his fiance so much. His fiance... He was so excited to tell Price and Laswell. They'd have to invite Alejandro and Rudy from Mexico, too, wouldn't they? Well, he couldn't wait for that, either.

Alex paused in front of the door and then he was pulling Gaz close, kissing him deeply and pressing him back against the wall. "God, I'm so glad you said yes. I was genuinely worried you wouldn't."

"You shouldn't have been." Gaz murmured, pulling back a bit. "I must admit, I'm quite obsessed with you."

"The feeling is mutual, trust me." Alex grinned at him and then kissed him for another long moment before pulling away and reaching into his pocket.

Gaz tilted his head as Alex frowned and then he watched Alex do a little dance, patting all of his pockets. "You grabbed the key before we left, right?"

"Fuck."

--

How many times have I written them getting engaged? Who knows.

[el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle]

Hiiii, I really like it when you share with us the thoughts you have about ysblf! What did you think of that second "meeting" between Patricia and Daniel? The one where she goes to his apartment after calling him out on her cell phone and he told her to resign (and minutes later she finds Aura Maria with Mario). I always see people talking about their first "date", which was at her apartment, but in my opinion this second one was much more disturbing. This one had more blackmail, manipulation and ab\/s3 involved, which made everything sadder. Not to mention the way Daniel treated Patricia afterwards, due to her logical reaction, him sending her away soon after, had a strong impact on her (which makes me wonder about her backstory, and if this has happened before with other people

It really irritates me that they didn't give much insight into Patricia's past, I think that would explain a lot about her).

ps: sorry if I made any mistakes, I'm translating using Google Translate

Hiii! Thank you for the ask!! Don't worry about mistakes, this was very good!😊

Oh, that scene! It's definitely so, so ugly. I'd say is one of the ugliest because of the heavy themes. Fun act, I just rewatched the whole ysblf here in the US on the Peacock platform and it doesn't have the scene after, when they're on Daniel's bed and he's breathing heavily nd all that. Idk why's that, but I definitely want to rewatch the full uncensored versión again lster

The "date" escene is bad, but I don't think that anything there ((except the sexual harrassment, obviously)) makes me uncomfortable. Daniel quickly detected a golddigger with Princess delusions even though she's pretty pathetic, so he popped her bubble. She wasn't going there with a genuine desire of getting to know Daniel. She simply wanted a walking ATM, and Daniel knew that. She was just looking for a plan B in case her "relationship" with Mario didn't lead to economic comfort. (((You gotta be smart even to golddig, ppl lol)))

But THAT escene, when Patricia goes to Daniel's place to basically beg forgiveness, and Daniel takes advantage of it is so, so ugly, uncomfortable, and raw. We are presented a very human and vulnerable Patricia in a way that we didn't get to see much. We didn't see a walking comedy skit like she later became, but an actual woman who fell so hard that she's now having to accept being coerced into sexual favors because otherwise she'll be consumed by poverty. It's a very sad and human story. And yes, we know Patricia acted very wrongfully by damaging the computer, but that's nothing compared to what Daniel made her pay.

Daniel liked to humiliate people, especially those from whom he could get a reaction, like Armando and Patricia. Notice he barely ever bothers Mario, for example? Or Hugo? Sure, he gives poisoned comments to almost everyone, but you can tell he likes to particularly humiliates those who won't take it lightly and will break easily OR pretend to be more than they are ((ironic considering this dude conskders himself classy, rich, and smart and we know he isn't lmao)).

In any case, Patricia was the perfect target as she fits noth categories anyway, and he chose to humiliate her to the biggest degree in that scene when he sends her away. He is saying she is useless but for sex. That all she is and can ever be for a man like him is momentary fun. That all she prides herself in are mere facades and delusions and there is no value on her but her body. And of course, he's told her this before, but in this scene he actively demonstrates it.

The characters' backgrounds are somrthing that we really needed! Patricia is one of those characters that as the novela progresses it's easy to forget how real and human her problems are, and it's understandable the audience has that perception. The novela took her extreme poverty and made a joke out of it. But she really fell low due fully to her ego. She was coerced into sexual favors, and later basically sells herself to Nicolás for the money for her car. She goes so down to the point she doesn't eat for days. Her fridge is empty, she has no electricity some days, cold water. And sure, it's a grave that she keeps digging deeper and deeper with every idiotic decision; a hell of her own creation, but a hell none the less!

My guess for Patricia's past has always been that she was born into extravagabt luxury, not just money. Either her mother was similar to her in her grandiose and vain ways and instilled that mentality on Patricia, or maybe she died when Patricia was too little. Her dad definitely seems the kind to be trying to supply every single materia thing. Perhaps this was his way to fill the void that her mom left in her. They seem to get along, tho. We see her calling him all the time tk tell him good and bad things happenjng in her life, so we can say they're pretty close, but with firm boundaries from her dad's side. I imagine she lived on his expense for a long time and he's now done with it.

Thank you for the ask🥰🥰

[hmshermitcraft]

For the weekly theme: first dates!!!

Hi Mod 🎀! This time I got inspired by your response to my previous ask, so I wrote a lil blurb that's set in the Hermittown Fae!AU as well! It's also poly!teamZIT, just because I feel like their chaotic energy fits this prompt a lot

Tango is still a fiery Blaze with a love for tinkering with weird inventions, Zedaph is some sort of satyr/goat creature who knows wayyyy too much about the human body for someone who never went to med school, and Impulse is a demon with a calm demeanor, and a love for gold (but he loves his partners even more!!!)

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

Zedaph, Impulse, and Tango have always been a team. They just seemed to understand one another without words. They hung out a lot together, sometimes working on Redstone creations, or sometimes just enjoying one another's company on lazy afternoons

So it wasn't really a surprise when their love for one another started to turn romantic. No one really remembered who started the topic, who proposed a date, or who mentioned that a meadow near Tango's mansion was full of flowers this time of the year, but all those things led to the current moment - the trio enjoying a delightful picnic, watching as the sun slowly set behind tall trees surrounding all of Hermittown

But the peaceful atmosphere didn't last too long, unfortunately. Soon enough Zed's ears twitched, catching the softest, quiet rustle of clothing ripping on tree branches. He alerted his partners, and all three of them looked towards the path leading from the town itself to Tango's mansion

Sure enough, a group of people stumbled from inbetween the trees. They paused, shocked at the sight of "fellow humans" peacefully picknicking in the middle of "very haunted" area

Impulse wanted to laugh at how much "ghost-hunting" equipment they had on them. Between all of them, they enough knick-knacks to put even Mumbo's curiosity shop to shame

The wannabe ghost hunters definitely lacked good manners, as instead of backing away from what very clearly was a date, they started to set up their weird machines. A choir of beeps and clicks soon filled the clearing, all of the machines going haywire from being so close to Zed, Impulse, and Tango. The dials and buttons soon flashed brightly, all pointing to the direction of the picnic blanket

Oh hell no. The humans will soon realise that the throuple was not sitting on a particularly active spot, but in fact they WERE the very reason why the equipment was going crazy in the first place

Tango didn't think twice, he grabbed his partners' hands and made a beeline for his mansion, abandoning their food. Maybe those stupid humans could follow them into the building, but they sure as hell were NOT prepared for what awaited them there. Tango's current priority was to get all three of them to safety, consequences be damned

The trio quickly rushed through the door into the mansion's main hall, up the stairs, and onto a narrow balcony overlooking all of the ground floor of the building. A few quick spells cast by Impulse made sure he and his partners remained hidden from the humans, unseen and unheard. The trio held their breath, waiting for the mansion's self-defence mechanisms to kick in

But none of those traps (or fun inventions, as Tango and Zed called them) managed to showcase how they worked. Before the humans even got close to them, one of Tango's pet Ravagers (magicked invisible by Impulse, to protect them from humans) chose that exact moment to stuff her face into one of the flower pots at the bottom of the mansion's staircase. Poor thing got a faceful of pollen, and then proceeded into a sneezing fit

Who would have thought that the roar-like seezes would be so effective in spooking the annoying humans! Tango almost fell down from the balcony with how hard he was laughing. Impulse kept on snickering as well, while Zedaph watched in wonder as the humans tripped over their own feet and equipment in their haste to leave the mansion's main hall

Ever since that day, the town, and especially the mansion, started gaining a reputation. People stopped seeing that area as a supernatural hotspot where they could take a selfie with a fully lit up EMF reader next to them. Instead, a veil of mystery wrapped the whole town, as the outsiders accepted that nothing bad will happen to them, as long as they keep their distance from the town's odd inhabitants

As thanks, the Ravager herself got plently of head scritches and treats from all the Hermits, but especially from Zed, Impulse, and Tango

And later on, during their wedding, she was the one carrying the box with matching netherite rings down the isle, towards the beaming throuple. It was a lovely throwback to their eventful first date

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

~🌠

The three are unapologetic about the reputation they gave the village because of their date. Impulse still wonders what the humans must've thought of than, but he's not found any posts about it. Clearly, they scared those humans perfectly.

Thankfully, their wedding has no interruptions by annoying, curious humans. Not any that aren't invited, anyway. The other occupants of the town were very happy to scare people away from the wedding day.

[bidisasterevankinard]

Reasons why I`m not giving up on canon buddie after season 6

btw remember you always have fanon. And buddie is pretty popular ship. ao3 is always here to have your back

I'm just will hope till every last episode

Buck should have chose his couch by himself. But also thing he should have stopped to be scared to "make a mistake again". Buck decided to try it with Natalia. It doesn't mean they are 100% are going to be together. He just let himself to try to live without fear of making mistakes. Because you cant live without them. Because you always is going to make mistakes in something. But you should allow yourself to live and learn from them

Also Buck asked her "to help him to pick a new couch". Not picking for him. Not just bringing her couch. He wants to be active in relationship now, and he wants the person he consider as a possible future partner to be with him in this. But the word "help" is interested. Something telling me Buck sees Natalia as a way to deal with his death. And I dont believe he is accepted this fact.

Maybe Buck is ready to try to be active in relationship we still needs to see if Natalia is ready for be with Buck at his worst and let him be with her at her worst (but for now she just run away after bad dates)

Eddie never just date people. He never had fun. And all this years he was closed after Shannon. He needs to try to open his heart a little bit, try to date someone for himself and answer what he wants. For now he is just excited to make something for himself. And it's amazing. But you can't always make it easy. Problems in relationship sooner or later will be here (fantasy vs reality). It can't be just "magic" every day. Can't be the best day every day. And Marisol was here as a perfect answer for Eddie's attempts to find magic in "dream" T-shirt

Eddie is scared to be alone, but we never heard him to name what exactly he wants from partner FOR HIMSELF. Never said what love for him. He always tried to connect again/find a mother for Chris, not partner for himself. Dates with Marisol is a good opportunity for him to think about what he wants. And how to make it reality

And here we can remember the "so many excellent choices right under his nose". It's about both of them. Eddie for years was closed after Shannon, believed he wasn't good romantic partner ("I wasn't enough"). Buck was making mistakes trying to cling to people and then scared to make mistakes again so tried to close himself from romantic relationship. He wanted real love all his life but settled to less because never believed he could have more. They both were creating their partnership with hearts close to real love, close to even let them try to see it. So yes they don't see each other as a romantic partner for now. They can't see the answer right in front of them. And before see each other they need stop to close and hide themselves, stop to be scared to make mistakes. And they are trying to do it now but with other people. It doesn't mean this people are their engame choices

If 911 creators really wants people to like LI for Buck and Eddie they should give them normal screen time and backstories and really good development on screen. And I can't see how they can do it with Marisol and Natalia even if abc will make it 22 episodes. They both for now is just LI characters and it`s boring. Their works also can't be put in the show for them to be not Ali/Ana again. Because Taylor at least somehow could be close to calls and her job made sense to be shown.

I'm still see couch as metaphor for Buckley-Diaz family. Because what was the point of introducing it like that? Family dinner. And Chris first started conversation. If it's not about Chris and Eddie, they could make it conversation with Maddie, Bobby or just with Eddie while they drink bear and talk about life. But it wasn't like that. it was cute family dinner with family recipe, with a board game

"Dating someone from the call..." Both met their new LI on calls

[ts-witchy-archive]

hi sweet! i was wondering, if you're comfortable, would you ever consider making a post or replying privately on how your audition process was like (for example, preparation, panel, etc)? i have an idea which school it is (is it j? 🤭) and missed the deadline this year, but am excited to try applying next year ☺️💕 please totally feel free to disregard if it's too much! thank you so much and hope you have a lovely week! 🌷💖🫶🏻

Hi friend!

Honestly I'd love to talk about the audition process because it was so unique and interesting. Although, J isn't the school i'm going to next year but never the less, I hope you find this helpful! I got callbacks for two out two schools that I auditioned for so I'll run through what happened in both because they were super different experiences. (also I'd like to apologise because this post is so long. so so so long. Like 2000 words. So I won't be offended if you don't read it all). And feel free to DM me at any time if you have questions or just want to talk acting stuff!

For reference, I'll call the school I got into 'Blue' and the other school I was rejected from 'Red'.

Very Quick Summary:

Round 1:

2 monologues videos or 1 monologue and a movement exercise uploaded to YT, personal statement video uploaded to YT, resume, headshot (professional not needed), audition form submitted to the university website.

Round 2 Red School:

In personal audition with improv games/activities (1 hour), questions with interviews and a cold read (1 hour), perform 2 monologues in front of the full judging panel and 30 other people.

Round 2 Blue School:

Perform your monologues in a screen test and for an audition panel

Preparation

So the first audition for both schools were the online auditions, questionnaires, personal statements and resume. A simple youtube video (or 3) would be uploaded with the URLs attached to audition form which also contained the questions. I also needed a 'resume' which had my training, experience and a headshot. The second phase were the callbacks. I had 1 zoom call back and 1 IRL callback.

Personally I started preparation about 3 months before the first submission date. I read through the handbook and online resources and made a list of everything I needed to do before submitting. I really recommend starting prep 3 months out purely because you'll be less stressed later. If you have an acting coach, acting teacher, drama teacher, etc. start talking to them at this point. I didn't but watching YouTube acting tip videos was how I kinda supplemented that. Learning from others is the best thing you can do. Join acting facebook/tumblr/instagram/discord pages.

Choosing pieces that work well with how you audition is so important. This sounds obvious because it kind of is but don't pick something that was made for TV unless you can convert it to stage. While you may be auditioning for a screen acting degree (or at least I was) you won't have the closeness of that camera to get your emotions across so it's important to understand how to translate those fine details across. You also need your pieces to contrast really well. I had to chose 2 monologues for one audition and 1 and a prompted movement exercise for the other. I tried to do something a bit different so I went for a 'comedy' piece (it was labelled comedy but it just ended up being sad lmao) and an Anton Chekov piece

YouTube and Preliminary Auditions

What was so amazing about the YouTube auditions was that I could search the schools I wanted to get into and stalk other people's submissions. I cannot recommend doing this enough! You learn so much from seeing other people audition. From watching those videos I mostly learned what not to do (which sounds a little mean to say but that wasn't the intention). Take notes on what you like and dislike about everyone's performances then apply those to your own.

I really recommend giving yourself at least 3 hours to film for each school. I know that sounds like so much time but it's better to have extra time than to run out of time. Personally, I was super unprepared and it took me 5 hours to film for the Red school. They had us do a 2 minute introduction and it had like 6 questions. I really struggled to get my point across in such little time while still coming across competent and confidant.

I had to do a prompted movement excise for the Red school as well. This was a little intimidating because the prompt was 'You walk into a room, find an object, then leave the room in a different emotional state' (or something like that). I love having complete creative freedom but also it felt like they would judge me more harshly if I did something 'lame' or predictable. I also had to make sure it contrasted with my monologue. It was a whole stressful thing.

Callbacks!

Red School: In Person Auditions!

This was one of the most exciting things i've ever done in my entire life haha. I wasn't able to take drama in year 11 and 12 so it had been 3 years since I had been in this type of creative space and I truly didn't realise how much I missed it until I walked into that audition space. All eyes are on you from the second you walk in and so it's important you show who you are straight away. For me this meant a lot of mental prep before going into the audition. I'm a very introverted person who isn't great with meeting new people and is pretty socially awkward so I had to force myself to skip that awkward stage. I love being an introvert but that combined with my resting bitch face, visible neurodivergent traits, etc I really had to go out of my way to show that I was excited, kind, funny, bubbly, collaborative and more. I truly think that was the hardest part of the whole audition.

As for what was included, the in person audition was made up of a large group of about 25-30 people which was then split into two smaller groups. In those groups we had improvisation, cold reads, an interview, monologue performances and question time. For the improv it was largely your basic drama games, nothing too crazy. Something I didn't do but I wish I did was google improv games and think about what I might do in these situations. We did these for about an hour, it was a lot of fun and very stress free. After we had a small break and question time. There were 2 current first year students who volunteered to help out, they were the people who answered our questions. While question time was happening people would be called into a room with one of the panel judges to do an interview and cold read. This was where I mainly think I fucked up my audition!

SO firstly, I'm a wee bit dyslexic (read as 'very dyslexic') and the judge new that but it just meant that I sucked at the cold read because I was concentrating too hard on reading. I kinda forgot she was there lol. But that wasn't the bad part. The bad part was the interview. The judge started by asking how I handled COVID. and I was like "ummm not very well at all lol". Naturally, she asked why, I explained why in the vaguest, least trauma dumpy way possible. HOWEVER, then she decided to ask me something along the lines of, "you seem like a very anxious person. Why are you going into a profession with so much rejection??". So ummm, I was kinda left speechless hahaha. All I could respond with was 'I've been rejected plenty of times before' which is, fine but not a good answer. Anyways, moral of the story, prepare really well for an interview. Take control of the interview and don't accidentally borderline trauma dump on your Judge.

Monologues! This was fun. We each had to perform 2 monologues. It took about 2 hours to get through everyone but it wasn't really boring at all. Everyone was so talented and amazing. There really isn't a whole lot to say tbh. They were monologues. The judges would try and redirect you after you finished (or half way through) your monologue to see how well you respond to direction and criticism. I really recommend trying to do your monologues in as many stupid styles as possible! It's great because A) you'll better understand the choices you make and why and B) it's so fun.

Blue School: Zoom Auditions

Blue school has been my top school since I decided to go to acting school a few years ago so to say I was a nervous wreck was an understatement. There were 2 parts to the audition, the screen test and the regular audition. The screen test lasted about 10 mins and is just to see how you looked performing with TV in mind. The audition panel is just that, your standard audition panel.

Now this whole thing was a cluster fuck. I was in the screen test for literally less than 2 minutes and was kicked from the meeting. It was 'technical difficulties' allegedly however, my best friend also had a callback for the next day and the same thing happened. Zoom said that the host kicked me from the meeting and not that it was disconnected so I personally think they did that to us to see how we handled the stress. For me, this actually saved my whole audition. It gave me a few minutes to calm down, have some water and ground myself. I have no idea if this is a common tactic or not but just be aware that a school might to do this.

I had the audition panel straight after and they apologised for the tech mess up, answered any of my questions and we did our thing. They asked me to perform my Anton Chekhov monologue (Irina from the 3 sisters. Her monologue from the first act). I didn't quite get what they were asking me to do at first. They kept prompting me to pretend that I was saying it to my best friend but it kept getting more dramatic because... well I'm super dramatic when I'm really passionate about something but turns out they wanted realism hahaha. The second prompt they gave me which made me realise they wanted realism was "you're saying this to your best friend who's in hospital". My best friend and platonic partner is actually chronically ill so this hit a little close to home. They're like never in hospital but it was still a bit... ouchie lol. At least the prompt wasn't boring?? The judges seemed to really love my take on that prompted, we had a whole conversation about what I did differently, etc. Then I was sent on my way!

Screen test part two was only slightly less stressful than part one. I tried to join the meeting with the new link they sent out, no one was there, I got the old link up on my laptop (whereas i was using my mum's PC) incase they were still using the old link. They were still using the old link and I almost missed my screen test (again lol). They wanted to see my 'comedy' monologue but they gave me prompt of "you're filming a video diary and you never want anyone to know that you have a crush on [the character], you haven't even really accepted it." for some reason that made me weirdly emotional lol. I completely forgot my lines about half way through when I really started to get emotional (the character talks a lot about her insecurities). The judges said that sometimes that can happen when you "unlock" a new level of emotion in a piece. I guess that's what they wanted to see because I got in! I really thought I had completely fucked it up. Moral of the story, even if you do something stupid, forget your lines, almost miss your audition and don't understand what the judges want from you the first time, it'll still be okay. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

Okay! I'm done. I'm so sorry for the word length of this and the fact it took me so long to reply! again, feel free to DM me if you ever have any questions, want to talk about acting or hell, even if you're bored and just want to chat. I hope this some what helped