#warning to the cabal | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

evilwickedme · 1 year ago

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I said I'd never do jumblr content again and yet here I am because this keeps coming up and it's like the only thing I can think about. That said I will not hesitate to turn off reblogs if y'all are horrible in the notes again, and be warned that I will be blocking anybody who supports any of the theories I mention immediately

There is no such thing as a conspiracy theory that isn't antisemitic. There is no such animal

Antisemitic conspiracy theories go back thousands of years. The ones that still have the most hold on culture to this day are the blood libel, and the protocols of the elders of zion

The blood libel was an accusation that would be brought against Jewish populations in Europe often but especially around Passover claiming that we were killing Christian children for ritual purposes, usually to use their blood for baking matza or other nonsense (it is important to me that you know that this is nonsense. It is horrible and damaging but also to the core a ridiculous lie that never at any point made any sense. They just didn't care). Debatably this trope is present in the merchant of Venice. Undebatably Jews were killed because people did and still do sincerely believe this

The protocols of the elders of zion is a fictitious document published in Russia at the very beginning of the 20th century, supposedly detailing the meetings of the Jewish people who secretly run the world. The protocols were almost immediately proven to be a rip off of another document - ah, plagiarism - but that hasn't stopped antisemites from embracing it wholeheartedly (special thanks fuck you to Henry Ford for publishing them in his newspaper, spreading it across the USA). It built on previous antisemitic tropes, from the greedy banker trope (Jews were forced to be money lenders in medieval Europe as it was forbidden in Christianity and Jews weren't allowed to join any guilds, preventing them from making money in any other capacity - the reason why there are so many Jews in Hollywood is identical, but in the early 20th century) to the concept of dual loyalty (i.e. Jewish are loyal to ourselves above all else and cannot be trusted to be loyal to the country where we live, see: modern trope that every Jew is probably loyal to Israel and the subsequent idea that it's okay to ask every single diaspora Jew how they feel about Israel immediately upon meeting them). It's also worth noting that the word cabal, used to denote the shadowy organizations that supposedly control the world, comes from kabbala, which is Jewish mysticism

The idea of lizard people, created by a guy literally named Icke because he is a gross human being, was designed to repackage the antisemitic shadow cabal concept to be supposedly more palatable

Most qanon theories also build on all of this, such as world leaders preying on children (remember pizzagate?)

But more importantly conspiratorial thinking always positions you as the good guy standing against a mysterious "them", an other which is influencing things behind the scenes. The Jew is the ultimate other, and specifically an other that supposedly forms a shadowy world government, controlling everything and yet somehow not managing to get rid of antisemitism (see: protocols of Zion, lizard people, we control Hollywood and the government which is of course conspiring against you). There is no way to decouple the idea of an evil shadowy organization (usually also referred to as a cabal to really hammer it in) from antisemitism and antisemitic tropes

And this means that even supposedly "harmless" conspiracy theories attract antisemites and train people who aren't necessarily rabid antisemites to confirm those kinds of biases. Obviously Qanon and lizard people are antisemitic, but what does the moon landing have to do with Jews? Well, it was Hollywood and the government that faked it, obviously. Hell, even the conspiracy that Taylor Swift is secretly a lesbian and is either still secretly dating or is exes with Karlie Kloss is riddled with antisemitism -

Okay so I need to explain my position on this because I fucking hate this conspiracy theory, and the fact that most people simply won't acknowledge that that's what it is. Firstly, Taylor Swift has stated that she is not gay or considers herself an ally at least three times off the top of my head, and specifically denied that she was dating Karlie Kloss. Secondly, outing people is wrong. Thirdly, the conspiracy theory hinges on the idea that she would be risking her career by coming out, except that she's proven that basically no controversy can come in the way of her career, she's already "come out" as an ally, donated to glaad and the equality act, promoted queer musicians & artists & designers (there was a song in the reputation tour that was dedicated to a gay designer every single night of the tour). So what's stopping her from coming out at this point? Mysterious forces, clearly. The antisemitism in that I've already explained, but also the virulent antisemitism among Kaylor shippers aimed at her husband and at the fact that she converted to Judaism is fucking disgusting

Again: even a supposedly harmless conspiracy theory leads to antisemitism and attracts antisemites

A few years ago I tried to rewatch white collar cause I remembered really enjoying that show as a preteen and after around a season I just couldn't stand it anymore, because all I wanted to do was jump into the universe and yell at Mozzie to shut the fuck up because these conspiracy theories were barely presented as a joke and never challenged even once by any of the characters. When I rewatched that 70s show it also fucking sucked, but at least it wasn't showing up in every single episode. The blacklist focuses entirely on a literal Cabal, that's what they're called

This stuff is so normalized and it's fucking everywhere and it's exhausting. Jews are to this day being murdered over this. I can't change the world by myself, unfortunately, but if you don't have a specific person to blame for your troubles, shut the fuck up. Just shut up. There is no conspiracy against you. Sometimes life just sucks. Or definitely does for the Jews who get shot at over this shit

Again, I'll be blocking anybody who parrots this bullshit in the comments but especially fucking gaylors y'all are one of the main reasons that being a fan of Taylor Swift's music is fucking unbearable. Just accept you can connect to music made by somebody different than yourself it's not that difficult of a concept

#this post brought to you by my burning hatred of gaylors #antisemitism #jumblr #jew tag #jewish history #conspiracy theories #t swizzle #to the people who will inevitably come into my inbox after this and ask me questions about antisemitism: pay me first #ko-fi link is through my bio #gail speaks

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reality-detective · 3 months ago

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🔥 EXPLOSIVE REVELATIONS: Rothschilds and Rockefellers in Free Fall as Banks Collapse! 🔥

In a stunning turn of events, the corrupt [DS] regime of the Rothschilds and Rockefellers is crumbling before our eyes. Desperate to conceal their massive corruption, they are resorting to private banks and covert tactics. The aftermath is becoming painfully clear as hundreds of banks in the US, along with major US stock agencies controlled by BlackRock [Rockefellers], are collapsing.

💥 NATO and the UN on the Brink of Bankruptcy 💥

As the dust settles, it becomes evident that the collapse of the Rothschilds and Rockefellers has far-reaching consequences. NATO and the UN are teetering on the edge of bankruptcy, with their financial lifelines severed. Shockingly, even the US military, the backbone of NATO, declines to support them in a potential war against Russia. Classified military reports reveal that without US military backing, NATO and the UN would crumble within a month.

🚫 Closed and Boarded Up: The Federal Reserve and the US Capital 🚫

Unprecedented scenes unfold as the US Federal Reserve remains closed and boarded up, while the US Capital sits behind barricades. Meanwhile, China, Russia, India, and the Middle East have abandoned the US fiat money banking system, refusing to sell oil to the US. The global financial landscape is shifting, and the implications are profound.

🛡 Inside Military Operations: Unmasking the Truth 🛡

For two and a half years, we've been warning you that we are amidst military operations led by white hats. The continuity of government is at play, with a shadow government running parallel to the facade. Patriots, Anons, and Q were the first to expose the fake White House studio where Biden is filmed. The truth is being concealed behind the fortified fences of the White House, where even the State of the Union address was never filmed.

⚔️ The Military's Silent Stand: Biden Left Isolated ⚔️

The plot thickens as it becomes clear that Biden is an isolated figurehead. The military never escorted him in Air Force One to the White House after his supposed election. He lacks access to the prestigious Cheyenne Mountain military base, and top US generals refuse to engage or brief him. Biden's presidency is nothing more than a charade orchestrated by the deep state, while the real power rests in the hands of the white hats.

📰 Mainstream Media in Meltdown: The Fall of the Cabal 📰

The fake mainstream media, controlled by BlackRock, Vanguard, and State Street, is in a rapid downward spiral. The truth is breaking through their web of deception, causing their empire to crumble. Meanwhile, Trump fearlessly takes on the CIA in a public showdown, exposing their covert operations to the world.

🌐 The Unseen Battles: Behind the Scenes 🌐

A whirlwind of events is unfolding behind the scenes. Nothing is a coincidence in this grand chessboard of power. The military, standing as the last line of defense for truth and justice, holds the key to our salvation.

Stay vigilant as the world transforms before our eyes. The military's silent revolution is the only path to reclaiming our freedom and dismantling the deep state's stranglehold on our society. 🤔

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the-garbanzo-annex-jr · 5 months ago

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by Gary Willig

The accusation that Israel is committing genocide is just as much a lie as the blood libels, well poisoning, and world domination accusations were. In theory, perhaps one could believe this lie and not be an antisemite, just as in theory, one could be an opponent of Zionism and not hate Jews. But in practice, both are impossible.

If it is antisemitic to believe that Jews murder gentile children to bake matzah with or that Jews have a secret cabal that controls the world, then it is antisemitic to believe that Israel is currently committing genocide.

Any factual examination of the war between Israel and Hamas would quickly and definitively show that Israel is not fighting to exterminate the residents of Gaza and is going to great lengths to keep civilians safe. Israel has given up enormous military advantages in order to warn civilians to leave before combat starts, most recently evacuating about a million people from Rafah before launching an operation to crush the last Hamas stronghold. Israel has allowed tens of thousands of trucks carrying food, medicine, and other humanitarian aid into Gaza over the course of the war and has worked with other countries and humanitarian organizations to increase the amount of aid that goes in.

And despite Hamas’s strategy of deliberately using human shields to protect its weapons and its fighters, Israel has achieved a civilian to combat death ratio of 1:1.5, possibly even 1.1, a historic achievement in the protection of civilians in modern warfare, where on average nine civilians are killed for every combatant death.

Not only is the genocide accusation an easily disproved lie, but those who created it are in fact projecting their own genocidal desires onto Israel. The purpose of the accusation has never been to protect civilians, but to protect Hamas and provide to support for Hamas’s openly genocidal goals.

#hamas #gaza #genocide #antisemitism #jews #blood libel #genocide accusation

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0w0tsuki · 9 months ago

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Hey Ive seen Baeddel used in a lot of your posts but like,, other than a definition of the word I cant really find much on what it means like discourse-wise.

I know its something relating to transfems but other than that im lost x.x sorry for the bother

Basically it started out as an old timey slur for trans women. The word "bad" is rooted from it. In the early 2010s a group of trans women adopted the term and had a community for a very short time before it collapsed and not much information is left over.

Some say that had abusive dynamics. Some say they were just talking about transfeminism like they do now. My sibling swears up and down from their personal experiences with the initial group that they were a group of grifters using queer politics to fundraise for tumblers first big scam, The ARK(C?) Project.

A bunch of anti-transfeminists in their efforts to create the magical word that will allow them to terf-jacket trans women without having it called out as such happened upon the term and used the lack of concrete history/the fact that most of the subjective history isn't too charitable to this original group to fabricate a conspiracy theory that these original Beaddels were an evil cabal of bigoted trans women who never really went away and now operate and sow intracommunity discourse from the shadows for the explicit purpose of weakening the holy divinity of TransUnity.

And while some of them moved on to other terms like "TIRF" and "Neo Radfem" a good portion of TransUnity/Transandro anti-transfeminists have latched onto the term and have doubled down on their intent to use it to create a category of trans women that it's ok to exclude. Out of all of the anti-transfeminists that have come out of this new wave, the ones who build their politics around "Anti-Beaddelism" are some of the most mask-off exclusionists of the bunch. Like look at how they talk about Beadels

They will list how these groups have a bunch of ties to nearly every anti-queer group they could think of. And then they warn White™(Because everytime they attack trans women they have to pretend like it's a race thing to distract from the transmisogyny) that they mean to need to maintain a sense of hypervigilance around their transfem sisters and read into every laugh, every joke, and every word for the possibility of finding Beaddel rhetoric. This is a manipulative abusive tactic to keep the transfems within their sphere of influence to reach other to other transfems and rely on TME people to tell them what's right and provide community.

I remember on sailorportia's "Anti-Egg discoursers sound just like my conversation therapist" post I saw one of these people referring to the notes section as "full of beaddel dogwhistles" and inviting people to "take a look and educate themselves". Not specifying what the dogwhistles are or how they are dogwhistles. Just vaguely gesturing at the notes section and inviting you to regard anything a vocal trans woman as a crypto-beaddel and anything they say as "beaddel dogwhistles"

These communities cultivate a sense of paranoia. They encourage constant scrutiny regarding anything a trans woman says. Their leaders sell themselves as protectors of the community whose exclusion is a necessary evil to keep online trans communities safe. They are incentivized to keep the term Beaddel definition murky but representative of all the evils they attribute to trans women.

The term in the modern day is largely prescriptive and moreso defined by the reactionary "Anti-Beadelism" movement than it is defined by its history. Only a few trans women have reclaimed the term. When anti-transfeminists talk about Beaddelism they aren't talking about an organized group or community, they are referring to a bunch of individual trans women they have branded with the beaddel slur.

Currently I don't think reclaiming the word is a good move. Not that I disagree with it or think trans women shouldn't reclaim it. It's just that it will do more harm than good for as long as exclusionists control the narrative on its definition. I've seen mutuals have their posts on general transfeminism get completely discarded out of hand because they had Beaddel in their profile name or bio.

Because like it or not the current definition of Beaddels that gets passed around was written by current ex-terfs/transandro nothorses bro and cites TERF resources in their definition. This is the same dude who's responsible for the foundation or the current TransUnity echo chamber and used the influence from creating that community to try and redefine TERF to include trans women for the purpose of TERF-jacketing.

It's why me and some other trans women have been picking up the words trasfeminism to refer to discussions of transfem issues and anti-transfeminist to refer to these new wave of transfem exclusionist. It denies the exclusionists the ability to define our politics for us to outsiders. Also note: If the term trasfeminism picks up in use your going to see a lot of these people switch from "Beaddel" to "Radical Transfeminist" as their go-to anti-transfeminist TERF-jacketing slur

#transmisogyny #transfeminism #exclusionists #beaddel #trans unity #transunity

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sehtoast · 10 days ago

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Tender Threads Ch 9 (Homelander x OC)

chapter nine: awakenings

chapter directory | slow burn, hurt/comfort, fluff, spidersona as original character, original trans male character, smut, sublander

summary: the world hasn't always been good to you, has it, little spider?

warnings: this chapter contains attempted/foiled SA against a minor, recollections of SA by a main character, and themes of hate-crimes

“– and now that menace is trying to corrupt our greatest hero!”

He fades into the world before his eyes even open. There’s an awareness of most things. A body beside him, fuzzy blankets beneath the palm of his hand, a pillow that his face is half sunken into, warmth…

“These arachnid types are all the same!”

And that damn voice…

He blinks slowly, eyelids heavy with the weight of rest the likes of which he hasn’t had in… well, he doesn’t know, really. Before him is his little spider, phone aloft in his limp hand playing on the lowest volume setting and looping what seems to be a podcast of some sort.

“Junkies, thieves, dangers to society!”

Despite the vitriol, Benjamin seems to have fallen back asleep. Homelander slips the phone out of his hand and squints. 8:45 in the morning… not quite time to start their day, but certainly a lot later than he normally sleeps. Not that it matters terribly much. Friday meetings always happened later in the day. Other than a photoshoot at two, their day was mostly clear.

Mostly.

“And now one’s in The Seven! What were they thinking!?”

The Bugle. Some low ranking news podcast channel he’s heard of in media demos that constantly begs for him to come on as a guest. Homelander rolls his eyes. This guy was less than shit in grass, but, all things considered, shit served more of a purpose. Just a washed up old editor for a disbanded newspaper company whose name he recycled shortly after they had to close up shop. Desperate for anything that could lift his views, even if it was just a rank amateur D-lister from some shithole like Cleveland.

Jonamy Ameson was no ordinary angry old man, it seemed. As Homelander scrolled the VTok page, it appeared that he had a massive personal vendetta against Spider-Man.

“I don’t want that kind of filth swinging around the streets of this great city– nay, this great nation!”

Every word was shouted with all of the poise of a tantruming child, fists slammed on his desk to rattle the cheap microphone, fingers pointed into the camera. If the video wasn’t about Ben, about Spidey, it was about Webweaver, Silk Strider, Arachno-Lad– basically any spider type hero was ripe for the picking, but Ameson’s prime target was always Spidey.

Interesting…

“To think Homelander would allow such filth on his team! The lawlessness of it makes me want to simply vomit!”

Maybe it was worth booking a slot on his little budgetless production to put Ameson in his place. For now, though… He has Ben’s phone. Ben’s unlocked phone. A quick glance finds the bug still out cold, so he gets to work.

Homelander was no aficionado with technology, but he knew one thing. A person’s cell phone was an absolute gold mine of secrets. Texts, photos, search history, all sorts of little obscure things he hasn’t been able to deduce from his secret visits and late night observations.

He starts with texts. The second to last person Benjamin had texted was his mother and, from the looks of it, the conversation hadn’t been pleasant.

-please talk to your brother. he loves you -

-he’s got a real funny way of showing it -

-he just doesn’t know how. you’re not being nice -

-the last time i talked to him he made sure to accuse me of being part of ‘tranny predator cabals’ but sure, *i’m* not nice -

The conversation seemed to have died there two days ago. He backs out and opens the most recent. In it, he finds Benjamin’s chats with his apparent best friend– the same one Homelander watched him have lunch with so long ago.

-i made Homelander mad, idk what to do -

-Duuuuude -

-help 😭😭 i don’t want him pissed at me! -

-I thought you’d want him at a distance after the stalking bullshit -

-i meaaan a few weeks ago yeah, but not really now yk? he’s not bad. kinda cool actually. you seen the pics yet of us running around together?

-Just that one from the other day with the car thieves -

The rest is… interesting. Ben told of their excursions. Of how scared he was the first time they flew but how he’s started loving it so much– how he’s embarrassed to ask but wants to see if ‘Homie’ would ever bring him up above the clouds at night.

-idk does that sound weird? it might be weird -

-It’s a little weird bro. Shit sounds a lil romantical ngl -

-😭😭 -

A little night trip, eh? He could do that… But a romantic flight? That was… something else. That the bug didn’t deny it was worth a raised eyebrow or two. Maybe… No. No, no… he shouldn’t entertain the thought. But maybe…

He shakes his head to clear his mind.

Benjamin’s gallery is little more than wanted signs and missing person posters, with maybe a shot or two relevant to his actual life. A few screenshots of stupid social media posts, a picture of the menu from Patsy’s Pizza…

He’s so fucking ordinary.

Homelander half expected to find rantings and ravings about how much the bug detested their time together. Something to undermine and dispel the illusion of all of this strange kindness. Hell, he was even hoping to find a nude or two to send to himself and delete the evidence of such from Benjamin’s phone right after– but there’s nothing. Even his social media is clean.

With a sigh, expelling emotions he can’t even name, Homelander leans over the bug to place the phone on the nightstand. And that’s fine until he realizes how close that makes them. The strangest shiver goes down his spine– a need to curl his arm around Ben’s abdomen and tug him nearer and sink into his very existence.

Their faces are so close. He can practically taste Ben’s breath and he hardly hates that it carries that morning-time smell with only a whisper of the bug’s toothpaste of choice. His nose should be scrunching in disgust. Every part of him should be reacting that way. Instead, he stares at Ben’s lips, imagines what it would be like to slot a leg between his and entwine their limbs.

He’s never woken up beside someone before.

Maeve never stayed. Never wanted to. The rare fan usually left right after, was far too fucking annoying to keep around, or just… didn’t survive the prior events. Even in the more innocent sense, like now, he’s never had this.

What are you doing to me..?

He leans in closer.

Closer…

The slightest nudge would touch their lips and he’d know if this was all just his mind playing tricks on him or if it was something…

Something else.

The fact Benjamin hasn’t startled awake yet is a miracle.

Homelander’s breaths grow unsteady, chest beginning to rise and fall faster and harder, heart hammering within. There’s something forbidden about it all. A fruit too sweet to taste that screamed for him to do it anyway. Could he stop himself?

Should he?

Eve cast mankind from paradise with a mere bite. Would the same happen here? If those gentle eyes happened to flutter open and catch him in the act, would he too be thrown from heaven?

He has to know. He has to fucking know right now.

He flinches the moment their lips touch. It’s as if Benjamin is pure electricity jolting through his very bones, fire through his veins, air in his lungs and it’s all from a mere brush of flesh. Homelander’s eyes roll and flutter shut. He goes back a second time, firmer. It’s a sensation running hot and cold through his entire body all the to the fog of his mind.

He doesn’t move. Doesn’t glide his lips further nor allow his tongue to swipe out. He just lingers there, letting every sensation lap at the shores of his heart, mind, and soul. It was like water in the desert. Food for a man starved. Freedom for a caged dog.

Pulling away is the hardest thing he’s ever done. But he can’t risk it.

He cannot be cast out from Eden.

Meetings had gone from a sore spot of anxiety to no more than a time to daydream. There wasn’t much to it. Homelander did the same-old-same-old. He’d ask about saves, about marketing, about media projects, all the regular stuff. This time, though, he gets to gloat.

“Well, the bug and I got up to some mischief with a few groups of undesirables this past week.” He says proudly, shoulders back as he preens before the lackluster attention of the team. “Media’s been eating it up, Home-Spider's been trending for three days straight. Our approval rates hit a hundred percent this morning. That’s how it’s done, team. ”

Homelander’s so giddy– happier than usual by a long shot. Ben wonders what’s gotten into him. Even their morning together had been incredibly upbeat. Granted said morning was a matter of waking up, having a laugh about the absurdity of having had a sleepover without discounting that it was actually enjoyable, offering Homelander a lackluster breakfast of cereal– which he politely denied, and seeing him off as he floated back to his penthouse to get put together for the day. But still.

Waking up beside him had been interesting. Seeing Homelander with his eyes shut, sleeping peacefully without a trace of stress, sourness, or even a distant, distracted mind warping his expressions was…

Well, it certainly brewed a nice warm feeling in the bug’s chest. The entire fact Homelander had shown up last night took Ben totally by surprise, but it spurred the strangest tidal wave of joy. Maybe because the ice cream apology worked out, but also just knowing he’d flipped the man who once threatened to ruin his life over to a friend was a source of happiness in its own right. But it was somehow more.

For so long, Ben’s only friend had been Jase. There was only so much the bug could pester him before he would start to feel like a nuisance. He’s lost so many people to having a dual life and hiding himself. All the events he’s walked out on to do the right thing, all the people he’s left behind, every text detailing how his absence was too hurtful to tolerate anymore… and even just the relationships that died naturally.

Although he was, at first, a suffocating force, Homelander has become the freshest breath of air Benjamin has breathed in a very long time. Strange how the man who destroyed his perfect balance could become such a thing.

“Now,” leather clad hands come down on Ben’s shoulders and jar him from his thoughts. The grip is gentle– kind, even. “Spidey and I have to get a move on to cover our obligations, but I fully expect to hear good things from everyone when we meet again on Tuesday.”

Once upon a time Ben would have expected those hands to be slowly crushing his bones in a display of dominance, but they do nothing of the sort. In fact, one drops and Homelander splays the other between Ben’s shoulder blades. Benjamin looks up and smiles, glancing to the side occasionally to watch the others depart. Maeve’s lingering gaze doesn’t go unnoticed, but he brushes it off.

“We’ve got that photoshoot next, yeah?” He asks.

Homelander nods. “Then some more district patrols. Oh, I’ve got a surprise for you too, but you’re gonna have to wait.”

“You wha–”

“Ah, ah. No spoiling it.” Homelander says with a wag of his finger. “Now, go do whatever it is a spider does. I’ve got a quick meeting with Madelyn before we leave.”

“Wait, like– it’s a good meeting, right?”

“Of course, silly.”

Silly? That’s a new one.

“Just make sure you’re on the roof when I’m done, ‘kay?” Homelander leans in, brow arched, voice softer and deeper. “Otherwise I’ll have to hunt you down.”

Ben’s brows raise and his cheeks tingle with a warmth that spreads a little faster through his body than he’d care to admit. “In that case, c-can I just… give you my number then?” Smooth. “Not to like, y’know– it’s so you can tell me when you’re done and I can–”

“Mm,” Homelander hums, pulling a phone out from god knows where in his suit. “That sounds like a super idea, actually.” He leans against the table and hands it off, eyes locked with Ben's. “Go ahead, put it in.”

Woah… is he– why’s he being so…

The bug taps away to create the contact, sends himself a message, and hands it back. Homelander peers at the screen for a moment before snorting a little laugh. Probably because of the contact name.

‘Ben 🕷️ 🤠’

“Behave yourself, Benjamin.” Homelander says as he stands once more, turning on his heel to leave. He gets to the door’s threshold before he turns back. “Oh, and don’t put my name in your phone as something weird. You fuckin’ Gen Z’s are always doing that.”

Oh, now it’s just pure fucking temptation.

“No promises. Homie.”

“Hope you didn’t blink. That’d just make us look bad.”

“I’m wearing a mask, you dipshit!” Ben cackles, releasing one web to tether another. “What if you blinked, huh?”

“Please,” Homelander scoffs as he floats along. “I’m perfect. I would never do such a thing.”

“Suuure. I bet.” The bug lets off at just the right angle to land on a low building. On the streets below, students were just letting out from a nearby high school and their far-off chatter filled the air around them.

Homelander touches down right next to Ben and shoots him a smug look. The teasing had been going on back and forth since they first left Vought Tower. Nothing crazy. In fact, it had all been perfectly good natured.

The day had been absolutely wonderful. They’d even snagged some churros once the shoot ended and ate them on top of the Empire State Building. Of course, Homelander complained about the low quality of the ‘meal.’ He was, after all, a man of refined tastes accustomed to steak and lobster and whatever other fancy-pants cuisine the chefs on floor twenty-two cooked up.

“What, you didn’t know you could do custom orders?”

“No!” Ben whined. “The fuck? You mean you can just get anything, and it’s like– it’s free!?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Homelander asked, giving the street vendor food a concerned sniff.

“‘Cuz it’s fuckin’– it’s so fancy, dude!” The bug throws his head back in theatrical agony. “My god, I’ve been eating lunchables and ramen this whole time. What the hell...”

“I don’t– why the fuck would it even matter if cost anything? It’s not like you’re poor anymore.”

“Old habits, Homie.” Ben gripes. “Once you’ve lived off’a jarred marinara and dollar store spaghetti for a month because you fucked up your budget, you just kinda get conscious of spending, y’know?”

“Nope.” Homelander snorts. “I would not know. That sounds disgusting.”

“Mm.” Comes a hum that breaks Ben from the joyful memory. “Sounds like a kerfuffle closer to the school.”

“Wanna check it out?”

“Just kids,” Homelander says. “Sounds like the pecking order is just establishing itself.”

The bug just looks at him.

“Fine.” Homelander grabs Ben at the waist and propels them into the air, zipping all the way to a rooftop overlooking some rank alleyway where a gaggle of youths jeered at another, shoving him back and forth between the circle they’d formed around him.

“Let’s see it, pussy boy!”

“C’mon, you say you’re a real man! Shouldn’t be that hard to prove it.”

A girl stands off to the side, phone pointed at the scene while she laughs in gleeful joy.

Ben jumps down with no care to slow his fall. The concrete crackles below him, drawing away all the attention.

The crowd parts with gasps of awe and horror, and in the center is an older boy frozen in place, hands mid-tug on a younger boy’s shirt.

Benjamin inhales deeply, holds it, then lets it go. They’re kids– remember that they’re just kids.

The girl holding the phone points it in his direction, quaking. With a thwip, he snags it from her, throws it to the ground, and crushes it under his heel. Rage brews in his gut like a poison. He’s almost confident his knees are trembling almost as much as his balled fists. It’s all but a mirror fucking image of himself... Tears bite at his eyes and it takes all he’s got to swallow the lump in his throat between the grinding of his teeth.

The kids flinch with his first step toward them. By the second, they’re inching their bodies to turn for their inevitable dash from the scene of the crime. All Ben wants is to grab each of them by the neck and throttle them senseless for what they were doing.

“Go.” He grits. “Get the fuck out of here!”

Normally, seeing them throw one another to the wolves and every-man-for-himself-ing it would be amusing. But not this. Not now.

The boy they’d been after sniffles and tugs his jacket back in place, zipping it quickly to hide the torn neckline of his shirt that had revealed a garment Benjamin knew all too well.

“Hey it’s– don’t worry now, okay?” He stammers, approaching slowly. “They’re gone, and they ain’t coming back. This yours?” Ben asks, nodding his head in the direction of scattered books, paper, and a crumpled bookbag. His heart hurts ten times worse when he spots the little pink, blue, and white pride pin dangling from a zipper loop.

The boy doesn’t answer, nor does his gaze rise from the ground. Ben picks everything up anyway. He spots a name on some torn up algebra homework.

“Eli?”

That does the trick. Ben grabs one last thing off the ground– a baseball cap– and shuffles over to him. “You okay?” The bug kneels once Eli looks back to the ground. Kiddo’s got a black eye and a bloody nose. “Think you dropped this,” he murmurs. He gently plops the hat in place and tugs it forward nice and snug. Perfect fit.

Thwip.

Whoever’s washcloth he snagged from the clothesline above will just have to cope with its loss. “Here.” He says, reaching forward with the rag to dab away the blood. “Pinch that for me, yeah?” When the boy’s hands don’t leave the neckline of his jacket, Ben sighs.

“Don’t worry about hiding the straps, little dude. I used to wear a binder too.”

And, just like that, shame and humiliation turns to awe and disbelief.

“Used to have shitty kids do awful things to me too.”

“R-Really?” Eli squeaks, voice nasally from the hold Ben keeps on his nose.

“So you can talk!” The bug chirps, lenses miming the way his eyes change with his growing smile. “Here, take that– awesome. But yeah… Yeah.” Ben slings the bookbag onto his back and stands. “Can I walk you home? Or I could swing ya. Your choice.”

The kid’s eyes light up even brighter. “I wanna– can we swing?”

“You bet!”

He swaps the bookback to his chest and lets Eli climb on piggy-back style.

“Hold onto your hat. You want the scenic route?”

“What the hell was that earlier?”

Ben's feet dangle over the edge. He and Homelander had stopped to relax not long after the debacle with the kids. There had still been a few issues around the city that needed handling, but they finally found a quiet moment. The top of Lady Liberty’s crown was the only place that seemed far enough away from the hustle and bustle of Manhattan, and they sat in near silence so long that the sun had started to paint the world in reds and golds.

“What do you mean?” The bug asks, sadness thick in his voice despite every insistence that he was completely fine.

“Just, all that.” Homelander doesn’t know how to explain it. The bug smelled like misery down to the atomic level from the moment he dropped the kid off, and there was obviously something personal in the way he’s been reacting to the situation. “You take every wet puppy we come across to heart, but you usually get over it pretty quickly. What’s the problem?”

It’s certainly irksome when the bug looks away. Benjamin’s dismay is practically stinking up Lady Liberty’s entire head.

“It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

Which is such a fucking lie. It almost makes him furious.

“Right, right.” He scoffs. “Your blood pressure is elevated over nothing. Got a little jack rabbit thumpin’ in your chest over nothing. Do you think I’m fucking stupid?”

“No, I just…” Ben sighs wistfully, but one of his uncomfortable chuckles cuts through it. “It’s just a lot, y’know?”

Since fucking when has his talkative little spider ever learned the art of silence? Christ, it’s almost a total role reversal of the other night. Ben’s silent, but all Homelander wants is their normal, stupid banter. He wants to hear about helping old broads cross the street and stopping bike thieves. He wants to hear Ben’s ridiculous anecdotes and pestering questions. But now he’s being deprived, and for fucking what? Because some pissant kid couldn’t fight off a pack of bullies?

“And I don’t wanna force you to be my therapist.”

As if the bug could force him to do anything. Time for a different approach.

“Heh, try me. I’ve been told I’ve got pretty strong shoulders.” He pats one for good measure. “Besides, the more you deny it, the more I want to know.”

The more I have to know…

Was there something not included in his file? Something Homelander hadn’t scrounged up in that shithole apartment Benjamin had been living in?

“C’mon, get it off your chest before you stink up the whole statue. Sad people smell bad.”

He stares and stares until Ben cracks the smallest smile. It would be fine if his eyes weren’t glassy.

“I just… ah, where to start…”

Probably at the beginning, he wants to say, but–

“That… happened to me.” Ben says, clearing his throat after a moment. “Just… really hit home, y’know?”

Oh.

Oh…

Homelander’s eyes narrow. He means to demand elaboration, but Ben beats him right to it.

“I… it was some kids at school.” Ben takes a deep, shaky breath. His blood pressure is climbing again, heart pounding, adrenaline brewing. He stares blankly into the dark nothingness of the river. “I dunno what they were even trying to prove, y’know? I figure you know all this already, but I wasn’t always a guy…”

He just nods. Of course he already knows. Vought didn’t miss a beat with that dossier. But, more importantly, Ben used to get harassed as a kid? It seems nothing short of preposterous. Benjamin’s a superhuman; he shouldn’t have a single problem putting filth beneath his boot–

“Apparently they were supposed to just beat my ass and prove a point, but I– it wasn’t…” Benjamin pauses, collecting himself, eyes shut.

Homelander inches the slightest bit closer. Never in his life has he ever felt a need so strong to pull someone into his arms. Hell, he’s never even asked someone to drop all of their baggage like this before either. He’s never cared. Things like this are beneath him… But how quickly that lack of concern has morphed into woeful rage the likes of which he hasn’t felt in decades…

“T-They didn’t do a lot, y’know, just– just some, but...”

Every sniffle, every crack in Ben’s voice rips Homelander’s heart to shreds. Someone had hurt his little spider.

“And I…” Ben wipes furiously at his eyes. “I think– I think that t-those kids earlier were about to do the same thing to that boy and–” Ben finally looks over, eyes bloodshot and puffy. Devastated inside and out. “Other than my old therapist and Jase, you’re the only one who knows about that now…”

His body moves on its own. Homelander pulls Benjamin over, loops an arm around his back and another beneath his knees and hoists him into his lap for an embrace unlike any he’s ever given. His heart hammers just as loudly as the bug’s.

“M’sorry,” comes the smallest, whimpering sob against the crook of his neck. “S-Shit, I don’t– crying’s not– I usually don’t–”

“Shut up,” Homelander says softly, careful to keep even the slightest shred of rage off his tongue. There would be time to find names later. Someday soon, hopefully. “Cry your heart out, bug boy. I can handle it. Good shoulders, remember?”

Ben’s body shakes with a small laugh that interrupts whatever suppressed weep managed to slip free.

“T-They are cozy,” he hiccups. “I’ll give ya that…”

He waits. Waits and waits and waits until Ben’s cries cease and his vitals fall back to less distressed ranges. By the sound of his breathing, he’s nearly wept himself to sleep. So Homelander does the only thing that feels more right than dropping everything to raze that little shithole town where Benjamin was raised to the ground.

“I’ve gotcha,” he coos. It’s the gentlest he’s ever taken off. Just a tiny hop was all he needed to become weightless and rise higher and higher. This is what he should’ve done right away.

“What’s–”

“Your surprise,” he says as if it were so obvious. “You like it?”

He certainly should regardless of how exhausted he may be. The sun casts its red haze across the clouds, painting them perfect hues of scarlet and pink, sinking bit by bit more and more beneath the horizon. The darkening blue of the sky threatens to overtake it all, like a god in and of itself ready to swallow the earth.

Ben clings to him even tighter.

“Relax. M’not gonna drop you.” Homelander huffs a small chuckle.

“I didn’t say you would,” yawns the bug.

God, their faces are so fucking close.

“You’re being sticky,” he hums with a small roll of his eyes. There’s not really a better way to describe it. “Don’t you trust me?”

Say yes… Please fucking– just say yes.

“I do, just–” Benjamin sputters, eyes darting to and from his gaze. “The heights, y’know? Wait, you can feel that?”

“No, but I figured you were stuck to me.” He teases, grinning from ear to ear.

The resulting giggle is like sweet music to his ears. It’s silent for a moment while the bug takes it all in.

“You can just– you can just do this like it’s nothing…” Ben murmurs after a while. “You’re amazing,”

“Mm, tell me more.”

“If I do that, your head won’t fit through my doorway anymore,” Benjamin chuckles. “But yeah…. Yeah.”

Just for that lovely compliment, Homelander decides the bug has earned a full sunset. Not until the sun fades away completely does he decide to descend and, even then, the bug is already halfway dozed off again. Messy hair tickles his cheek and he’s so glad Ben can’t see the smile he’s struggling to keep at bay.

Because it’s endearing, he tells himself.

He flies as slow as possible to savor the moment. It's awkward to maneuver two bodies through the access hatch at once, but he manages to do it all the same.

Part of him expected Ben to hop down as soon as they were inside, but, to his surprise, the bug does nothing of the sort. He clings weakly all the way back to the bedroom, and those arms don’t quite unloop from around his neck even after he lays Benjamin on the bed.

Their eyes meet and the space between them is so very small. No different at all than when he’d stolen that sweet, sleepy kiss…

“Hope you enjoyed flying air-Homelander,” he murmurs, smiling softly. All the rage he’s felt since Ben’s confession has melted away, replaced by butterflies and fondness that feels so sweet that it could give him a cavity at any moment. “You’ve arrived at your destination…”

Instead of letting go, those arms pull Homelander into a warm embrace. No one ever really knows that Homelander can quite literally sniff them out. Every little chemical the brain makes tickles his bloodhound nose in some way or another. And Benjamin..?

“Mm, thanks, Homie…”

He smells sweet.

“Of course.”

Warm. Welcoming.

“Get some sleep,” Homelander hums. The arms at his neck fall slowly and he tugs a blanket up to Ben’s chin. Even after he leaves– reluctantly, of course– and with a troubled mind, he can’t shake that scent. Serotonin, norepinephrine, oxytocin, vasopressin…

He smells like love.

Oh god. Oh god…

He’s paced back and forth through the penthouse for hours now working through the hurricane of emotions sweeping through both his heart and mind. There was rage. Pure, unbridled, wrath at the fact someone had harmed his sweet Benjamin. That they’d done such damage to the boy… it wasn’t enough to even fathom rolling heads. It had to be more.

He’d clenched his gloved fists over and over again, each creak of the leather a promise of how he’d crunch bones and sinew between his fingers and rip them limb from limb. He’d savor it. Every second would be perfect. There were no faces yet to attach to these fantasies. But soon, the very minute the staff clocked in, he’d put analytics’ sniffers on the trail. They’d scrounge up something. They fucking better.

Look at you, all in a twist over the bug.

His reflection stares back in the mirror, but there’s a lack of anger. There’s no ridicule in its eyes.

“I–” He swallows thickly, eyes darting between the window and mirror. “I hate that someone… hurt him.”

I know, John. I know… Why is that, do you think?

“I don’t–” He swallows again, letting loose a shuddering breath. He does know. Dare he speak the words? It was just a fixation, damn it! For so long, it was just a fixation. Just watching Ben through the walls of his shitty apartment, just floating out of sight to watch him swing to work, just watching – just…

It’s the same reason you’re so afraid of the next few days. They’ll be over. You don’t know if he’ll keep coming around. Chatting with you, sitting on rooftops, hanging out.

It was undeniable. As much as he tries to bury the feeling, there’s anxiety bubbling in droves over the idea of their mentorship week ending. He’s never really had something like this. Ben feels like a friend. Sure, sometimes he’s a pain in the ass and he never shuts up, but he’s so…

C’mon, tiger! Do the math. You snubbed Madelyn for him this morning. What, you can’t put two and two together?

“I can’t–”

Can’t what? Admit it? Because that makes it too–

“Real.” He deadpans. It makes it too real. These feelings, the reason he felt the need to sneak that little kiss, the way his heart fluttered earlier… letting Ben dump his baggage and not sneering or telling him off…

“I–”

Just then, his phone dings from across the room and a jolt of excitement sparks through his body like a barrage of lightning. He knows without even looking. He knows because no one fucking texts him let alone talks to him after work hours. His number was seemingly business only for so long, until…

Along came a spider.

He smiles sheepishly and does an awkward little run to his phone. He chucks his gloves off on the way and grabs it with delight, hoping beyond hope that it’s–

-can’t sleep :( wanna do another movie if you’re not already asleep? i’ll let you pick-

Giddiness rises in his chest and tugs the corners of his mouth into a big, happy grin. Duh, he wants to say. But he doesn’t reply at all. Instead, he’s down the side of the building and inside the hatch within moments. His hands shake slightly as he shuts it. The barely-there citrus scent and the aroma of popcorn greets his nose first thing, and it feels so right.

Ben’s in the kitchen to greet him, standing there in his boxers and a t-shirt while his snack of choice pops away in the microwave. A thrill runs up his spine at the sight.

What a way to end the day.

#homelander x oc #homelander #homelander fanfiction #the boys #the boys fanfic #homelander x reader #the benlander agenda #canon x oc #shout out to amy for being my jj parody that's so spot it's barely parody

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mariacallous · 1 year ago

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No one expects him to resign, not only because he lacks the decency and integrity to do so after arguably the worst day in Israel’s history. It's also because of the criminal charges he faces.

Resigning is counterproductive to his personal interests and they, not the State of Israel, are what counts. His trial, not Israel's security, is his priority. He has lost all legitimacy and can't be trusted, certainly at a time of war when such monumental decisions need to be made.

That he's the first prime minister in the history of democracies to wage war on his own country, on its institutions and foundations, is clear. For years, but especially since he launched his antidemocratic constitutional coup in January, he has declared war on Israel’s elites, the judicial system, the checks and balances and by extension the military he views as an elitist cabal undermining his political agenda.

The popular pushback to his attempted regime change now looks like distant history, because Saturday October 7 wasn't only a tragedy on an epic scale, it was a debacle and an inflection point. Netanyahu and his cabinet callously betrayed the sacred trust, the core of Israelis' compact with their government: security.

For this there is no redemption, no contrition, no salvation. He must go and he must go now. No excuses, no political deals, no mitigating circumstances. For all intents and purposes, he's incapacitated and can't discharge the duties of his office.

His government is extremist, messianic, hollow, inept and inherently kakistocratic – government of the worst. It buckled in the first moment of crisis. He and his dysfunctional ministers betrayed Israel, and effectively his government is no longer functional, except maybe for the defense minister.

He isn't Winston Churchill, to whom he likens himself, and he isn't Abraham Lincoln. No one looks up to him at the ultimate moment of tragedy and crisis; only sycophants trust him.

His record is one of incompetence and gung ho delusion – and there is a clear and present danger that all his wartime decisions will be polluted by personal, legal and petty political considerations. He can't be trusted, nor is he credible to manage the war that is only just beginning.

His constitutional coup has categorically harmed national security and taken a high toll on the military's preparedness. He was warned about this by the military's chief of staff and by former prime ministers, defense ministers, chiefs of staff and hundreds of former generals.

In fact, in March he casually fired Defense Minister Yoav Gallant because Gallant was expected to deliver a statement arguing that Netanyahu’s constitutional coup was endangering Israel’s security. He has shown arrogant recklessness, dereliction of duty and responsibility, as well as gross negligence in managing Israel’s national security.

Now look at his foreign policy and geopolitical record. It's nothing short of abysmal. Let’s go through the areas one by one, starting with his bogus claim to fame. How ludicrous does his decade-old bragging look – that only he can save Israel, and indeed Western civilization, from the regime of the messianic mullahs?

Iran. The Islamic Republic has accumulated enough fissile material to produce five nuclear bombs, according to the Pentagon. It has reached unprecedented levels of uranium enrichment. Meanwhile, it has further deepened its hold in Syria, Lebanon and Gaza while tightening relations with Russia and China.

Hezbollah in Lebanon. Thanks to Iranian material support and political mentorship, the Shi'ite organization is as strong as ever. After what has happened with Hamas in Gaza, the arrogant statement that “Hezbollah is deterred” should never be taken seriously again.

The Palestinians. Here the record is just as ominous. Hamas has launched the most lethal attack on Israel ever. Whatever the outcome of the current war, during Netanyahu’s reign Hamas has become as strong as ever, armed as ever, audacious and murderous as ever.

Netanyahu, the man who just a few years ago vainly pledged to “obliterate Hamas,” has done nothing. Absolutely nothing. He has effectively strengthened Hamas, allowed tens of millions of dollars from the Gulf to be funneled to the terror group to implode the Palestinian Authority so he can proceed with annexation.

Under Netanyahu, the PA's weakness and ineptness has brought Israel closer than ever to the unviability of the two-state model. Israel is dangerously close to a binational state where reality is binary: Either Israel ceases to be a Jewish state or becomes an apartheid state. A majority of Israelis want neither.

In the international arena Netanyahu boasted during the 2019 and 2020 election campaigns that he's “in a different league.” Those huge posters showed him with Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump, but in this arena where he pretends to be a world leader, the record is strikingly unimpressive.

The United States. He has not been invited to the White House in the 10 months since his new term began. The Americans' criticism, including by President Joe Biden, of his constitutional coup is unprecedented.

Russia. His friendship and mutual admiration with Putin was so fruitful that Russia is now aligned with Iran, buying drones and other weapons. Even his morally depraved policy of not standing with Ukraine – to be fair, a policy he inherited from the previous government led by Naftali Bennett and Yair Lapid – hasn’t won him any points with Putin.

China. Two months ago, Netanyahu ostentatiously declared that he was invited by Xi Jinping to Beijing, while a “senior source” added that the idea was to signal to Biden that “Israel has options.” Not only is China expanding relations with Iran, it has also been condemned by Israel for its “balanced” stance on Hamas’ massacre of civilians.

Is Netanyahu's record so dismal? Of course not. He has forged a great friendship with Viktor Orbán, the towering intellect from Hungary. And he spent 25 minutes with French President Emmanuel Macron earlier this year. Plus he really likes Narendra Modi of India, and while Hamas was planning its attack he flew all the way to California to chat with Elon Musk about artificial intelligence. Stellar.

Netanyahu cannot and should not be trusted to manage Israel at this juncture. The mechanics for removing him are complicated and there is no clear path. But placing any trust in a man who got Israel here is far more irresponsible.

Netanyahu Must Go Now, Not After the Gaza War

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unlucky-phantom · 9 months ago

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Losing his spark: Cayde-6 x Solar Guardian reader

so, my first actual full fic. Don't get your hopes up, I've no idea if this is any good or makes any sense, tried to keep it as in character as possible. It's barely proofread and I'm only like 4 hours sleep so excuse any typos but fingers crossed it all makes some sense.

as always, have a good day lovlies and I hope you enjoy xoxox

WARNINGS: Death, injury detail, angst and violence under the cut, if you can't handle these please scroll away, I promise I'll write something fluffy and sweet.

Well, this wasn't going as expected.

Cayde and yourself had been trusted with what was supposed to be a simple in and out mission. Into the cabal stronghold, grab the intel (maybe shoot a few bad guys and look good doing it) then back to the tower in time for some piping hot ramen. His plan was flawless. or as you had called it "winging it".

Praise was reserved for quiet moments, whispers about how you were his favourite, how he had never seen such a bright solar spark in all his years at the tower, just so he could watch the blush bloom onto your cheeks and your smile. Oh, your smile, he would set aside what little pride and dignity he had to see it just once. You could point at any star in the night sky and if you asked, he would retrieve it for you. If only he had the guts to tell you this. He would eventually. He had plans, a clear summer night, hot ramen, something strong to drink with a nice kick. Just the two of you.

Well, you had always been overly cautious, but it worked surprisingly well for the pair of you. Cayde, the man with the plan and a slightly headstrong attitude and you, cautious and always with 6 back up plans. That's what he loved about you, of course, he wouldn't say that out loud, no, he had a reputation to maintain.

The mission was going well. the pair of you had crept into the cabal's stronghold unseen. Suspiciously easy. That's when all hell broke loose. The plan was lock tight. They shouldn't have known you were there but now both of you were up shit creek without a paddle...or a boat...or a life jacket. Someone must have tipped them off. Legionaries, phalanxes, gladiators, centurions, and war beasts surged out of every doorway and corridor. It was nothing either of you couldn't handle.

He thought.

As bullets flew the pair of you slowly drifted apart, swamped by cabal, the well-oiled machine the pair of you were when fighting started to rust. Soon you were just a distant blur of solar energy. His little firefly, his solar flare. He couldn't stand and watch though, as shot after shot was fired from his trusty hand cannon into the swam of red.

The ambush was thinning, he knew the pair of you would pull through you always did.

Then he felt it.

As if a part of his own light was ripped from his very being. A tidal wave that rocked the whole room, he had to catch himself from being thrown against the wall as the pure light that surged through the area bowled him over, knocking the wind out of him. No. Not you.

The red tide didn't stop, but the surprise of the explosion gave him the perfect window to see the despair as your ghosts shattered shell, lightless, scattered across the floor. The scream trapped in your throat as the gladiator speared you onto its cabal serverus blade, the stench of searing flesh permeating the air, the way your legs buckled, and body thudded against the floor as the gladiator kicked you off its blade.

The war beast that clamped down onto his left arm causing him to drop his hand cannon was first to feel his retribution. Snapping out of his trance he grits his teeth, throwing the war beast with such force it dented the steel wall behind him and grabbing ace he reloads and unleashes hell. Shot after shot echoed over the roaring screams of the cabal. Bones crunched, tendons snapped and popped until all that was left was the gladiator, your body at its feet in a gasping crumpled mess.

Cayde saw red. He doesn't know how many rounds he pumped into the gladiator. He doesn't remember ripping its jaw apart as he screams in pure unbridled anger. He doesn’t remember being beating it into a bloody unrecognisable mess.

The red tide was now a red sea. Cayde had spilt enough blood in his lifetime, and he would spill more in future. But now wasn't the time to dwell on his crimson-stained past.

It was Sundance who snapped him out of his anger, his body tense, chest heaving. "Cayde....they need you" Sundance says quietly.

Cayde is at your side in an instant, hand barely able to cover the ragged wound in your abdomen as he pulls you onto his lap. "No no no no no" he mumbles his hand instantly soaked in your blood. You had always been a paragon of strength, the pair of you often rough and tumbling in the tower, sparring in the training room, but now in his arms you felt fragile, body trembling as you gulped for air.

"h-hey" you rasped weakly a pained smile on your face. "We...we sure showed them."

He choked on his words "Yeah, we sure did”.

"I’m sorry"

Why were you apologising? You shouldn't be apologising. He should have been beside you; he should have been better; he should have done more. It should have been him. His thoughts fly a million miles an hour.

"Don't you dare apologise" he rasps, his voice synthesiser becoming more staticky.

"I'm sorry we couldn't have been more" you whisper, his hands stroke your hair as he rocks you gently.

"Wasn’t supposed to be like this. Was supposed to take you back home, treat you real nice" he growls in frustration. He couldnt loose you, not now. Not after there was so much he wanted to do, so many words left unsaid. He had saved so many cheesy pick up plines, so many date ideas, crimson day, festival of the lost, the dawning festival.

He had plans for every single one with you beside him. He removes your helmet, if he was going to say this if he was going to hold you in your final moments, he wanted to see those eyes he loved so much. the ones he would think about late at night, the ones he longed to see when he would turn in bed to the emptiness of cold sheets. Sheets that would remain cold. That would never see your warmth.

"Oh yeah? tell…Tell me about it" You begin to cough, and his arms tighten around you, he can feel the visceral rattling gurgle that accompanies each breath and he knows it will haunt him.

"Was gonna take you to that ramen spot in the city, you know, the really nice one in the city, has the pretty lanterns outside? yeah, I’d get you whatever you wanted, on me, really spoil you. Then I’d take you to our spot-"

"That little overlook on the city wall?" your voice, quiet and scratchy barely reaches his audio receptors.

He nods smiling through the pain to keep you relaxed, he had time to scream and shout and cry later, right now you were the only important thing "that's the one. Bring with us a little something to drink and watch the sunset. Maybe we would have a little slow dance under the stars. Always said I’d take you dancing one day didn't I?" the static in his voice was becoming more prominent as he had to force the words out, willing his body to stop trembling, trying to comfort you.

“Sounds nice”

“Then I'd tell you everything, everything I should have told you months ago” he mumbles burring his face in your hair, if he could cry he's sure he would be in floods, just another reason he despised his exo body.

“It's okay, I knew”.

“You knew?”

You weakly nod and struggle to put on a smile, bloody lips barely managing to up turn, your face was pale. You were fading fast, trickling through his fingers like sand and no matter how hard he tried it was like trying to catch water with a siv. “Always knew. I love you to”.

He can feel your faint heartbeat getting harder and harder to pick up under his blood-soaked fingers.

“I love you”.

Sundance didn’t have the heart to tell him they were already gone before he said those three words. She wasn’t ever going to tell him.

You knew.

You had always known.

Traveler help the poor bastard who tipped off the cabal about their arrival. Because no force within the known galaxy could protect them from Cayde-6

#destiny 2 #cayde 6 #x reader #cayde-6 x reader #angst #cayde 6 x reader #fanfic #reader dies #reader insert

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