#waking up at 4am for work is so silly

[love-in-my-twenties]

so maybe i do like my work. only a little bit.

(i still can't wait to stop working full-time though. also i'm probably changing bakery on monday - it's a net and i rarely stay in one for more than a week - and then i'll probably come back to complaining)

[vanoefucks]

book recommendation tag game!

rules: recommend as many books as you like. please include genre and some basic information on it (either your words or a copy+paste synopsis). feel free to include cover art, a personal review, trigger warnings, and anything else! just don’t spoil the book!

Tagged by @dekarios <33 ty!!

BITTERTHORN : Kat Dunn

Genre: Gothic Fantasy Romance (sapphic) (adult)

Blumwald is a town overshadowed by an ancient curse: in a sinister castle in the depths of the wild wood lives a monstrous Witch. Once a generation, she comes to claim a companion to return with her – never to be seen again. Now that time is drawing near once more... Mina, daughter of the duke, is grieving and lonely. She has lost all hope of any future for herself in Blumwald. So when the Witch demands her next companion, Mina offers herself up.

I adore this book and although it took me a while to warm up to the prose (it had been a while since I’d read anything other than ya) it drew me in and I finished it over the course of 2 train rides. It’s beautiful and made me cry but it’s so??? Comforting in the strangest way.

ALL THESE BODIES : Kendara Blake

Genre: Mystery & Horror (ya)

Summer 1958. A gruesome killer plagues the Midwest, leaving behind a trail of bodies completely drained of blood. Michael Jensen, an aspiring journalist whose father happens to be the town sheriff, never imagined that the Bloodless Murders would come to his backyard. Not until the night the Carlson family was found murdered in their home. Marie Catherine Hale, a diminutive fifteen-year-old, was discovered at the scene—covered in blood. She is the sole suspect in custody. Michael didn’t think that he would be part of the investigation, but he is pulled in when Marie decides that he is the only one she will confess to.

I love a small town vibe & saw this at the charity shop with its shiny! Cover so obviously I picked it up. I read it slowly but only because I didn’t want it to end. It was so cool to read it from the point of view of Michael and the details get pretty fucked up so warning with that. Heavy discussions of murder and gory details.

PRINCE OF THE SORROWS : Kellen Graves

Genre: Fantasy Romance (lgbt) (adult)

the book gives you a list of tws at the start worth looking at

Without an academic endorsement to make him valuable to the high fey, Saffron will be sent back through the veil to the human world. When mistaken identity leads to Saffron learning the true name of brooding, self-centered, high fey Prince Cylvan, what begins as a risk of losing his life (or his tongue) becomes an opportunity to earn the future he wants. But as other human servants soon fall victim to a beast known only as “the wolf”, Saffron realizes he has embroiled himself in a manipulative reach for power like he never anticipated. Between the wolf, uncovering forbidden magic, and his growing feelings for the prince, Saffron will have to decide which is most important to him

Now this series is literally what made me buy a kindle in the end. I love the rowan blood books even if the second one after this had me tearing my hair out. It’s the first and only fae book series I’ve read and I don’t think any will ever hold up to this. The characters are to die for and the author does so well with having you root for saffron. I love it so dearly.

Bonus: the Spider-Man and & Deadpool comic run LMAO

Ok so!! I’ll do 3 for now ^^ thank you again for the tag <3 i love reading even though I’ve slowed down due to work :[ & I'll take any chance to share some of my faves.

Tagging @leonbastralle @landgraabbed @ambrozians & @gallusneve (no pressure whatsoever as always <3)

[hyunjinsbelovedamericano]

Sleepy time with bf! skz

------------------------------------୨୧

Tysm for the request! I have wrote something like this before but I have way more ideas

Fluff ofc, implied fem reader on Felix's part

---------------------------

Bangchan

Winter times is the time where you and bangchans sleeping schedule drop,4am is the new 20:00pm! Even though you have to wake up 3 hours early tomorrow it doesn't stop you from staying up late

Youd end up scrolling on Amazon looking up things that you wanted, Chan knew that you were a shopaholic your basket was FLOODED with items

"baby,you can't keep adding items to your basket like that"

"What why"

"You don't have that much money"

"Yeah but you do"

Chan sighed knowing he couldn't say anything back to this,he always wanted to shower you with gifts he should expect your basket to overflowed like that.

He didn't wanna keep you up too long though,so he cradled you to sleep like you were a baby,your knees would be up to chin and you would be laying on your side,Chan would put him arms around your waist his warm hands relieving any type of pain your stomach was having

Lee know

Lee know would 100% loveeee to cuddle with you and his cats, it's like free melatonin.Soongie would be in between the both of you, purring from the head scratches.

If you're struggling to sleep, say no more, Soongie, Doongie,Dori and Minho are to the rescue!It's like sleeping on clouds, it's comfy cosy and it has Lee know. What more could you want? Right before going to sleep Lee know would help you prepare for bed, if you weren't having such a good day he would help you with your skincare, make sure you have fresh pjs you just have to go to sleep stress free.

He would be a bit confused though, I don't think he would have the best knowledge on how these face masks work

"No,lino-you,you have to-wait"

The face mask would end up all over your face, even going in your mouth once

From now on you know to sheet face masks preventing anything bad happening in the future

Changbin

Changbin always had energy so it would be harder to fall asleep with him,he's constantly so giggly and silly but it's hard to hate him because.. It's changbin

You had a very big collection of plushies which changbin found very cute, before you even started dating you forced him to memorise the plushies names. You had them piled up on the side of the bed and made him name the plushies you picked up.

"Whats his name?"

"That's a he? I thought it was a she-"

You would get frustrated with him not being able to remember ANY of them, you taught him this!

"Changbin! You know this"

"I kinda don't though"

You sigh heavily and plop down on the bed beside him,

"I was too busy looking at your pretty face"

He would try to cheer you up with being a flirt, it wasn't gonna be that easy though. He would have to smother your face is kisses and cuddle you trying to get you to relax, once he noticed that you started getting sleepy he would lay his head on his chest playing with your hair,falling asleep with you

Hyunjin

Hyunjin would treat you like a princess, he wants to make sure you enjoy every bit of your rest,you guys would be snuggled up in a heated blanket he got you for your birthday, this time of the month is the coldest and he definitely doesn't want you to get sick

If you had trouble sleeping he would sing you to sleep,play with your hair until you fall asleep. Anything that makes you feel at ease

When you wake up kkami would be there in between the both of you,how did he even get here? Whatever he's here now and that's all that matters

You guys would have debates on who has to switch off the light

"Hyunjin I'm already in bed"

"So am i"

"Yeah, but, I got here first"

"I don't wanna get up tho"

"Neither do I!"

You would end up forcing him to do it 🤷‍♀️

Han

Omg han would snore so loud,your trying to get some peaceful rest and all of a sudden you hear this agitating grating sound, turns out it han! And he's snoring

You expressed to him how loud and annoying he can be when he's asleep, to this he just acts oblivious and clueless

"What dym I snore? No I don't"

"Are you certain?."

But when he doesn't snore you guys would be pulling all-nighters knowing you have to wake up early the next day

Binge watching your fav k-dramas, one more episode wouldn't hurt right?

I honestly see han being a drooler, he sleeps with his mouth open most of the time which causes drool to fall down the side of his mouth, ew

Felix

He would ramble to the extreme, like daymn don't you ever run out of words to say?

Yk those clips of him where he just says the most stupidest things to ever exist, yeah he's gonna dump them on you

"Yk how Australia is two or three hours ahead of Korea,if you think about it when I go from Sydney to Korea... I'm basically time traveling"

"Felix go to sleep"

All he does is talk honestly,yappa yappa yappa

He would talk until you fall asleep, when he's not talking about stupid shit, he would be talking about your future

Like your wedding day, how many kids you wanna have

"We should have 5 kids"

"NOO"

"Why not?"

"If ur birthing the kids then sure"

Seungmin

You and seungmin would 100% pillow flight, even if you're not awake he'd hit you with a pillow

If you have to get up early and you're not waking up he's just hit you with the nearest pillow he can find

"Honey wake up"

"Honey get your ass up"

".... Okay then"

All of a sudden you'd wake up from being brutally attacked by a pillow, how rude of him

"Seungmin, ow-what are you doing?!"

"I told you to wake up"

What a menace

Jeongin

I lowkey think jeongin would sleep walk, just for lil bit yk😋

You would wake up in the middle of the night and turn to side to see no jeongin, where did he go?

Just as you were about to get up to look for him you heard a creak from the door, you turned to see jeongin leaning his head against the door

Obviously you were confused like,what when how why

You rushed to him and tapped him on the shoulder gently not wanting to alarm him

"Jeongin wtf"

This seemed to awake his from... Whatever and he snapped back into reality

"How did I get here?"

"I don't know you tell me"

--------------------------------------

[strawberry-cowmilk]

the brothers when mc has a nightmare

-> mc has a bad dream and goes to the brothers' rooms for comfort

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

content warnings: nightmares

-----

Lucifer

he's a very light sleeper so he'd probably wake up before you even touch him or call his name

lucifer probably figured out you had a nightmare because what else would you be doing in his room at 5am (other than maybe putting toothpaste in his shoes because satan and belphie begged you to do it)

if you want to, he'll go to your room with you and wait until you fall asleep but if you ask nicely you may sleep in his bed

but imagine walking into lucifer's room because you had a bad dream and he's laying there flat on his back with the sleeping mask diavolo got him

Mammon

good luck waking him up because he can sleep through anything

but eventually you do get him to wake up (mammon screams and almost falls off of the bed)

but then he's like 'oh hey mc, I totally wasn't scared, what's going on at this hour?'

when you tell him you had a bad dream and needed comfort mammon feels super happy you came to him out of everybody in this house

but he tries to play it off like he's calm about it, like 'oh well I guess I could let you sleep here, be honored the great mammon lets you' (you can tell he's super shy and happy)

Leviathan

he's probably awake gaming when you stop by his room

and levi thinks you came to play games but when you tell him you had a nightmare he kind of has no idea what to do

do you wanna play a game to take your mind off of it? or do you need something else

in the end, levi lets you sleep in his bathtub because he realised you came to him because he makes you feel safe

levi doesn't go to sleep though, he keeps playing his game (blushing the whole time)

Satan

he's also awake when you visit him

and he literally asks him 'why are you awake' when it's 4am or something and he slept 3 minutes last night because he wanted to read

when you tell him you had a nightmare, satan gives you a picture book filled with images of cute cats

he said that book always calms him down after a bad dream, hopefully it helps you too

and yes you may sleep in his room (just be careful you don't trip on any stuff scattered everywhere)

Asmodeus

he was ready to kill anyone who dared disturb his sleep, he thought it was one of his brothers at first

'WHO- oh hi mc'

when you tell him you had a bad dream, he instantly made room for you in his bed next to him by scooting over

asmo will hold you for the rest of the night if you decide to accept his offer

and if you want to talk about it he'll listen to you, if you're extremely disturbed by the dream he'll try to distract you by telling silly stories

Beelzebub

he knows what it's like to have a bad nightmare, he could instantly tell what was going on

beel took you to your room, because he did not want to risk waking belphie (he would not be happy)

he offers you some water and your favorite snack and waits for you to stop being too distressed

beel doesn't bring it up ever after you're feeling better, if you're okay he's happy

if you want it, he'll stay with you until you fall back asleep or for the rest of the night

Belphegor

good luck waking him up first

but once he got to the point where he was able to register what you were saying, he felt bad

belphie offered you a space next to him, at first he was worried about waking beel up but he's not in the room (probably working out or in the kitchen)

he makes sure you will have a good dream this time, you can even tell him what you want to see and he'll make it happen

belphie gave you permission to wake him up if this happens again

[kneelingshadowsalome]

just out here thinking of König with reader who looks like a meek lil thing until she gets comfortable with him and then is just a kind of a weird little gremlin

"König, let me stack donuts on ur dick"

"let me hold your dick while you pee, I wanna try aiming"

"would you love me if I was an eldritch entity?"

"hey let me peg you one time"

*smacks his ass when he bends over to pick something up*

"god I would live in your ribcage if I could"

"oh can you deadlift me? I wanna be thrown around"

" I wanna put you in my mouth and shake you around like a dog with a chew toy"

*4AM* "so what kind of tree would you be? I think a lovely Willow would fit you"

König would be in love, point blank period.

He would just look at his meek little gremlin with warm eyes everytime she said or did something adorable and silly. She could wake him up any hour of the night even if he was sleep deprived after a hard work patch to ask him what kind of a tree he would be. She can stack those donuts on his dick and make him eat them afterwards. He would also chase her around the apartment (super clumsy) after she smacked his ass because he knows it makes her giggle ^^

[hyuk4sbf]

thoughts on txt and somnophilia 👀👀

NSFW CONTENT AHEAD ^_−☆

warnings(?):consent is kinda ? implied but sometimes pretty dubious here plz b careful just in case! both parties enjoy it all tho!!!!

gn!reader to the best of my ability w top!txt :p

ANYWAY! one of my fave topics how did u know<3 under the cut cuz i got a lil carried away idk im embarrassed i dont rly like this … its like 4am and i wrote this on my phone k? T_T

> yeonjun who continues to drop not-so-subtle hints that he wants to wake up one morning with ur mouth on his cock. he’ll be ecstatic when u take the bait, rubbing at his bleary eyes as pleasure licks up his body in flames combusting.

and there you are, lo and behold, mouth working over him with eyes heavy and dark, like you’ve just been waiting for him to wake up and see you and your pretty mouth around his hard-on<3 his tongue laps over his parted lips, dry from the night air, before he leans into you and his mouth curves into a sleepy smile.

smooths his palm over the mess of your hair, thumbing over the swell of your cheek before he hums pleasedly, loudly enough that it breaks off into a moan. ‘to what do i owe the pleasure, sweetheart?’ his voice husky and rough, sounding so full of himself like u can’t feel the tremble of his thighs under ur palms— like he hasn’t been practically begging for this :3c

he’ll press his shin up between your legs as best as he can without hindering ur movement, breathlessly grunting how he’ll return the favour when you make him cum in your mouth<3 (+imagine his pretty golden skin under the morning sunlight that peeks through the blinds … phew!)

> soobin who’s just sooooo sleepy, work tiring and exerting him beyond belief poor baby (_ _).｡o○ but!!!!!! :( he misses u so much, misses the intimacy of having u cum in his mouth while his hands hold urs, just misses ur body against his so badly</3

it was like a surge of adrenaline, a rush through his veins when he saw u after such an exhausting shift. has ur reassuring smile always been this pretty? he practically jumps u then and there in the doorway of ur apartment, lips capturing urs with an eagerness rough enough to bruise and swell.

and now… the adrenaline’s wearing off, eyes quite literally fighting to stay open despite the fact that he’s literally inside u. ‘eyes on me, baby,’ you murmur, riding him with ur hands steadying urself on his broad shoulders. it’s not uncommon that the sex will get overwhelming and soobin’s eyes will fall closed— however, the little hum he gives like he’s listening and the way his eyes only just barely open again at ur command makes u realise this is different.

u click ur tongue, chuckling slightly before u go to move off of his lap. soobin’s having none of that, eyes shooting open again and u really see how tired he is up close like this. he whines, louder than he had been most of the night and wrestles an unforgiving grip on ur waist to keep u seated on his cock. ends up pulling u close, eyes already falling snap shut on him again.

‘c’mon bun,’ you’ll urge him with a giggle, joking that ‘you’re falling asleep at the wheel, silly.’

‘don’t care, keep going… missed you so much. use me and make yourself cum…’ ｖ（＾＿＾ｖ）♪

> beomgyu has the biggest kink for being used in his sleep i’ve ever seen (・・?) that one video of him pretending to sleep on stage and wrapping his own hands around his throat? hm!

ask him bashfully if there’s anything he’d want to try in bed and he’s practically leaping to tell u he wants u to take him while he sleeps. god only knows how many opportunities he gives u on the daily, sleepy bear always tired ‘n napping whenever he can :p he wants so badly to wake up w u riding him and ur hand around his throat :<<<

waking up with a head fuzzy, feeling like his whole body is on fire and— oh! there’s you, mouthing over his cock through his pyjama pants, hands pushed up his shirt and thumbing over his nipples.

you want to be disappointed he didn’t sleep through it, pouting a little where u tease his cock, but he looks so incredibly pretty like this too. eyes blinking like he just can’t quite get used to the morning light, chest already heaving under ur touch and face flushed a pretty red hue<3

he whimpers into the otherwise silent bedroom, hands shaking as they come up to cover his face embarrassedly because fuck he is so hard right now.

‘don’t hide, baby bear.’ u smile up at him, cheeky and smug and so so fucking pretty and he’s so gone.

u laugh at the tears in his eyes, although not unkindly. he’s just too cute (〃ω〃) u move upwards, planting urself in his lap and grinding downwards and fuck he really might just cream his pants at this point and you’ve barely even done anything. arousal is one hell of a feeling!

‘please touch me,’ he begs with his lower lip wobbling, a hand smoothing over the curve of ur ass to encourage u to grind harder into him. you coo, pushing his hair from his face.

‘go back to sleep, baby. can’t use you like you wanted so badly if you’re wide awake, hm?’

he’s never conked out faster in his life, maybe he’s even pretending, who knows? :3

> taehyun who wakes you up with head, peeling your pyjamas and underwear down your legs as carefully as he can and spreading u for him like ur a whole meal <333

head between your thighs as he watches the way your eyelashes flutter and eyebrows furrow with every flick and suck of his mouth and tongue against ur sex, so so so aroused for him even when ur not awake ฅ/ᐠ. ̫ .ᐟ\ฅ

he hums against u when u finally wake, moaning so the vibrations cause a jolt in ur pretty thighs that are already in his grasp. his mouth becomes rougher, used with more intent when he feels your trembling hands finally lace through his hair and tug. his eyes never leave yours, even in the dark as u struggle to keep ur head from rolling back into the pillow. ur eyes screwing shut ‘til there’s static behind ur eyelids because fuck how is he so good at this everytime without fail? didn’t he just wake up too?

palms rubbing up and down your thighs to soothe u through the intensity of the orgasm he gives u, something u weren’t exactly expecting at an ungodly hour of the night while the moon still kisses the horizon, about to clock out for the sun to rise.

he’ll press a kiss to ur sex before he pulls away and moves himself so ur face to face, watching the way ur chest heaves as u try to catch ur breath. he grins, incisors peeking through cutely like he didn’t just make u forget ur own name for a good minute. like he’s not literally hard against your hip and ready to go. u can practically imagine the puppy tail wagging behind him excitedly. he pecks ur lips, sharing the taste of you like it’s simply his chapstick.

‘morning, honey.’

> kai who doesn’t really understand at first why u would want that, what fun would sex be if ur not even technically there enjoying it? he’s not shaming u though!! he’d never dream of that and he’s (somewhat) willing to try just for u!

and oh. that’s when he starts to get it

how could he ever resist u when u always look so delectable pressed up against him of the night time, body soft and warm, pliant, against his?

he breathes shakily through the arousal that licks up his spine, ur breath hot and damp where u sleep tucked into the crook of his sensitive neck. it’s what u wanted, he tells himself, you said it’s okay. that u like it. poor baby is caught in a dilemma of morals, but it doesn’t take him long to work himself up into a frenzy and god hmmmm :( he really needs u right this second </3

shifts u over so delicately, so gently because he doesn’t actually want to disturb u, wrapping himself around u so ur secured back in his embrace. and the guilt starts to shift away, a moan falling from ur lips as u rouse briefly, and he’s so hard, why is he so hard?

he doesn’t know if he could start with actually fucking u in ur sleep, so he settles for this— testing the waters by starting to hump against you while u sleep, rhythm picking up and breath hitching in his throat because it just feels so good, you feel so good.

poor pup’s working himself up so bad :( he doesn’t even realise he’s whining and whimpering rather audibly until ur already awake and stroking his hair, pulling him as close as close can be, and murmuring sleepy praises right into the shell of his ear.

make him cum in his pants, yawn and tell him to fuck u properly as u drift back off<3 ฅ/ᐠ. ̫ .ᐟ\ฅ

leave me ur hard thoughts here !<333

[zedrine]

hiya !!! this is that anon who sent like. 2 sunny asks and the first requester! since i saw your post i would like to request a post-game omori sunny x reader!

but bare with me cus this is a little ooc pls 😓

OKAY SO it's where sunny is being a little jealous because reader is hugging a pillow on their sleep, where he ends up replacing the pillow with himself so that the reader hugs him instead

also, since i'm going to visit your blog frequently, can i be 🎼 anon? if you'd want it!

XHAHAXSGXHAXSHAHSAHCH ANYWAY that's all, thank u so much for taking the time to write this !

Z.3 — featherless pillow!

PAIRING : SUNNY x READER

WARNINGS : none!! <3

DESC : already mentioned at the top🫶

NOTES : HIII AGAINN🫶🫶 [image by @blululu_ on X/twitter!!]

hfhfhhdjsjfnfHFHFJDJGNRNSNS

IM SOS SORU IF THIS IS SHORT

HE XANT TAAKE IT ANYMROE

touch starved sunny frfr

work is shit; SUNNY’ve arrived at the house, late.

usually, you’d approach him, with crossed arms, exclaiming questions upon his dismay; he didn’t like being yelled at, and, luckily, you two would always end up cuddling together whilst drifting off to dream land.

but, it was already 3am, or about to turn 4am, who knows? it was so late; he was tired, all he thought of as he sauntered up the staircase, was you! cuddling you would always cheer his stressed ass up.

but when he arrived in the bedroom, he grumbled in an instant — silently, though.

everyday, he’d always try his best to return home IMMEDIATELY, for cuddles, but also so that you wouldn’t give cuddles to none other than your infamous body pillow. a lousy, featherless pillow! gosh.

this time, he knew he was gonna see this sight; you and your pillow, embracing and enveloping each other’s warmth. eh, this is something silly to be worked up on, so SUNNY never mentions this issue to you.

but he had enough.

quickly, he switched to his pajamas (if only he weren’t so tired, he would’ve flounced in every move) and, with an extremely slow manner, he crawled over your sleeping body, examining your hands as they caressed pillow’s body.

he swore a reminder to himself to make that pillow into a boss in HEADSPACE.

ah, but he was just too tired to manage any thought (he just wanted you LMFAOOA) and before he knew it, his body moved involuntarily — but with extreme cautiousness — as he pulls the pillow out of your arms, and he almost had a seizure of shock when you groaned at the loss of something to cuddle.

hm, that dilemma of yours would only last for long!

carefully, he lifted your arm, then laid beneath it. and, as he made his each move, he held his breath tight.

ah, at last. warmth. your warmth.

he felt lightheaded as soon as he closed his eyes, melting into your embrace, snuggling his forehead upon your neck.

screw that pillow!

the morning sun screamed through the window, shining on both your skins, and eventually waking you up. you sighed, finally reuniting with SUNNY after such a long night!

and as you tried to stand — oh! — “Sunn?”

[boydepartment]

is that..? - kai x gn! reader

a/n: writing late at night again on my phone. just something quick while i’m sad listening to taylor swift :) reader can’t sleep and so they catch kai playing animal crossing at like 2am

wc- 200ish

warnings- none

MASTERLIST

you kept tossing and turning. it was late and you just couldn’t sleep. whether it be because of nerves from the day currently, or the nerves boiling in your system for tomorrow. there wasn’t even anything going on tomorrow. you just always struggled with the what ifs of life.

what if you get kidnapped tomorrow?

what if someone is mean to you tomorrow?

what if you forgot to turn the oven off?

every what if was just another check box to the list.

you sighed and finally decided to get up to get water and to check the oven. as that was now weighing on you.

you were in the dark kitchen, your feet pitter pattering softly on the tile. trying to not wake up your roommate.

when you got a glass you heard a little

“yahoo!”

wait a minute…

your feet took you to the living room, you saw a blanket with a light gleaming out front the covering. it was leaning against the couch, presumably sitting on the floor.

“kai?”

the blanket moved and you saw his head peek out. his hair was messy and sticking all over the place. he looked like those prairie dogs in those nature documentaries.

“hi y/n.”

you looked at him and then where the light was coming from- his switch.

“are you…? is that…?”

kai grinned at you, he was tired obviously, it was like 2am. but he still wanted to smile for you, “i’m playing animal crossing. want to sit down with me?”

truthfully, he didn’t care what time it was. it could be 4am and he could have to get up at 6:30am and kai would still want to spend time with you.

“okay.” you smiled softly, happily taking the distraction. you sat next to him and he pulled the blanket over you both. kai’s head acting as the pillar to the makeshift fort.

“what did you catch?” you asked him, leaning your head on his arm. you couldn’t reach his shoulder at this angle.

“shark. i am in summer night fishing right now.” he said simply, “i time traveled even though soobin forbid it.” he chuckled softly and you nodded listening to him.

“can i see your museum?”

“oh of course y/n!” kai moved his cute little villager around the screen. apparently he took the long route through his animal crossing island. kai shared little stories and showed you his villagers.

in this moment you didn’t have to worry about life’s silly what ifs.

all that mattered was kai showing you his hard work on his animal crossing game.

[fortheb0ys]

Need at least three dicks. Hendricks, Taylor and Khail. One for everyhole. I would give Khail a special treatment with bj because he is just our silly little boy and imo he if fem farah. Anyway. Also Khail makes me want to cuddle him. Like cuddles snuggles all the way. Also i want to Peg Hendricks. Peg not fuck. Taylor also will be fine but Hendricks. His smile is just so cute. Also i need more bots with them on all ai apps. Did i write it just because i noticed you fangirling Taylor? Maybe , did im gonna write oneshot from stuff i writen ealier ? Maybe , but first i need to write another fanfic. It will be inspired by codfan art . Did i Ask author of the fanart if i can write it and after getting premission i stayed quiet for few months already ? Yes. But i'm close to finishing planin the lore so be patient. But maybe writing one shots from Black ops isn't so bad for start....

Smiling hendricks

Also i want him to treat the strap like he is treating this chocolate thingy:

(pic by me)

Im horny. And sleepy. Dominik horny sleepy little fella. Like i wake up at 4am, fall back asleep and wake up at 6 and didn't even take a nap after it. Going to sleep and write some freaky stuff.

ALSO IM PLANING ROLEPLAY WITH MY POOKIE. BO3 ZOMBIES. AKA PRIMIS CREW AS 2024 OLDER TEENAGERS PLAYING MINECRAFT TOGETHER(RP WILL BE IN MC) ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ???? ITS GONNA BE SFW. ALL OCS WELCOME BUT WE NEED SOMEONE FOR THE ZOMBIE CREW

Khail my baby boy getting special treatment. I need him where I can see his pretty face. He's front and center. Your eyes locked with his as your mouth works at his cock. His pretty brows knitted together. The pleasure changes his face, somehow making more breathtaking than it already is.

You could get lost in those eyes and that you did. A sharp kick to your side reminds you of the added company. Hendricks is under you, demanding for shared attention. Your cock slipped out of his needy hole and as you were preoccupied with Khail, you had completely forgotten to stuff Hendricks back full.

Giving a huff around Khail's dick, you blindly guide your cock back in it's rightful place. You continue to suck and keep a rythm at the same time. As you were finally getting into it, a small whine reminds you that Taylor was left neglected. You take your eyes off Khail and let them fall on Taylor. His cock painfully red and weeping.

Your hand wraps around his hip and pull him closer. It's hard to maneuver around, pinned by both Khail and Hendricks but you find a way to reach behind Taylor. Spreading his ass, your fingers begin stretching his aching hole. A gentle hum sounds from deep in Taylor's throat. It's content and satisfied. Though he much rather throw Hendricks off of you, being the one to get fucked stupid on your cock, he'll take your skilled fingers as a win.

His hums turn into moans and grunts as you find yourself into your rythm again. Out of the three of them, Taylor was surprisingly the loudest. Maybe it was the long years of military service, spending quality time with just his right hand, that made him more sensitive than the others. His noises didn't seem to please Hendricks much, as Taylor let out a pained yelp. At first you thought you'd hurt him but as you pulled yourself off Khail, looking down you see Hendricks teeth buried into Taylor thigh.

You give him one deep thrust against his prostate, making Hendricks forget his problems with Taylor. His tip drips white. He's close, you think they all are.

Multitasking is something you're working on. Taking time for everyone as well as rewarding the most well behaved. Khail found him with your attention most of the time as Taylor and Hendricks were at each other throats to be your favorite.

The demand is tiring and you're just as close as the rest. You lap at the underside of Khail's cock, the vains dancing on your tongue. The salt taste fills your senses as he finishes down your throat. You swallow everything, licking his tip to not waste a single drop.

One down, two more to go.

Your fingers make quick work of Taylor's greedy hole. He takes in a third as the stretch becomes a burning pleasure. His grips your shoulders trying to steady himself as he begins to shake uncontrollably, as orgasm ripples through his body as he cums completely untouch.

Now all eyes are on Hendricks.

He smiles wide as your attention falls solely on him. You're pulled down into a rough kiss as you nail his prostate making him see stars. With a few more lazy thrusts, he cums screaming. He's completely lost in lust rotten brain as you follow shortly after cumming in his twitching walls.

With your last bit of strength you push yourself off Hendricks and fall onto the filthy sheets. Breathless you begin to let sleep overtake you, unwilling to do anything about the mess. Your eyes fall heavy as you fall asleep to the sound of Hendricks bickering with Taylor on who gets to cuddle you. A heavy weight curls up next to you as Khail takes the opportunity to be the one to hold you.

Pookie, if you write a fic I'd eat it up😭🫶 Writing these gave me life! I love the idea of having all of them in bed.

[actual-arrrchie]

NEW FNAF FANART GAME Hey! So yesterday at 4am I had a vision and scribbled a messy sketch on my phone but it gave me an idea!

You can draw your own version/interpretation of this sketch! If you decide to do so, make sure to @ me so I can reblog your art!

More info below

For some context, maybe it'll be helpful, maybe not:

The sketch is inspired by the song "still feel." by half•alive

It's scooped Michael suddenly waking up with Ennard's wires visibly coming out of his chest

There aren't really any rules and there's NO DEADLINE

You can do whatever you want with this sketch.

You can do a quick sketch or a fully rendered piece, you can use some funky colors, change the pose a little, change the composition, whatever you feel like will work best!

The only important thing is that you REMEMBER TO @ ME to ensure I can see and rb your work!

If for some reason I don't see it, PLEASE @ ME AGAIN - don't be afraid to do it!

Hope you have fun with it if anyone decides to try it out <3

I'll do my own version as well and I'm really excited to see how other people can interpret this silly lil sketch

[landofzero-archive]

Perplex - Prank Intersection 8

Season: Spring

(Location: Starmony Apartment Hallway (2F))

(Early morning. Rinne Amagi’s prank filming day)

Rinne: Fuaaahfu…… Oi, Yuta…… What time is it?

Yuuta: About 4 o’clock. It’s still dark out, so it’s still the middle of the night.

Rinne: Seriously, it’s only natural that I’m tired…… Whose bright idea was it to do a wake up prank? They’re costing me my precious sleeping time.

Kuro: You’re the one who suggested it……

Yuuta: Yeah. Rinne-senpai’s the one who told us to meet at 4am.

And yet he was the last to arrive and he was late. Are you gonna have self-awareness about your work from now on?

I specifically asked Kiryu-senpai to be the photographer. Do you understand that?

Rinne: Don’t get so worked up, Yuta. If you speak too loudly, the Vice Prez might notice, won’t he?

Yuuta: And whose fault is that……

Rinne: Hm? Actually, Narushii hasn’t come yet, has she?

Kuro: Yeah. Narukami declined since lack of sleep would be bad for her skin.

We don’t need that many people for a little wake up prank anyway.

Rinne: True. But, Narushii is also missing out.

It’s a great opportunity to see the Vice Prez’s silly face. Right, Yuta?

Yuuta: You’re the only one happy about that, you know.

Rinne: Nah, the Yuta that pranked the Vice Prez is just like me!

The prank is a variety show where you make people look like idiots and then laugh at them♪

Yuuta: Haah…… It’s no use. Being with him just makes me stressed in the end.

Kiryu-senpai, let’s get this over with.

Kuro: Yeah. I also want to get a few more hours of sleep in. So, you all line up there.

Rinne: Alright, Yuta. Let’s link arms and get going. We’re fellow accomplices, after all♪

Yuuta: Nope. Stop yapping and get prepared.

Rinne: How cold. The dynamic duo is immediately at risk of breaking up……

Kuro: And let’s go. Three, two……

Rinne and Yuuta: “Good morning everyo~ne!”

Rinne: “Y’all in front of the TV, don’tcha know how late it is? It’s 4am.

There’s only one prank we could be pulling so early in the morning!”

Yuuta: “Yep! It’s the class wake-up pra~nk♪

Oh? Are you bored of watching simple wake-up pranks?”

Rinne: “As a matter of fact, our target ain’t some run of the mill idol.

What a surprise! The target this time is Ibara Saegusa of Eden.”

Yuuta: “When it comes to Saegusa-senpai, even within Eden his private life is especially shrouded in mystery.”

Rinne: “He’s in high demand as a talented CosPro idol. He’s a real super star!

He’s also the vice president of our office, so he might get peeved if we prank him but……

That doesn’t matter! Today I’ll be showing you the Vice Prez’s most private moment without any mercy: his sleeping face!”

Yuuta: “But it’s not interesting just charging in to wake him up, y’know~

So this time…… Ta da~♪ There’s the bonus of throwing a water balloon at Saegusa-senpai!”

Rinne: “It’s also washing his face, so it’s killing two birds with one stone. How about waking up with some nice cold water, gyahaha♪

Btdubs, besides me and Yuta, Dora-chan is also here as our photographer♪

Isn’t it extravagant to use an idol as the cameraman!?”

Kuro: “You’re the one who begged and forced me……”

Rinne: “My bad, my bad. Besides being the cameraman, Dora-chan helped out in a lot of other ways.

There’s other idols rooming with the Vice Prez, so he talked to them and got them to go to other places for today.

Well, none of ‘em are from CosPro so it would be hard for us to do the behind the scenes work. Rinne-kun also worked his hardest, y’know.”

Yuuta: “C’mon, don’t go on forever about the behind-the-scenes stuff. You’re getting too vivid about it.

Or rather, Rinne-senpai had absolutely nothing to do with it. Why are you acting like you did?”

Rinne: “That’s because I’m the one who came up with the project. Any success from it is also my success♪”

Yuuta: “Uwah…… you’re so irrational. Maybe I should jump ship after all.

Juuust kidding♪ Now, let’s end the introduction and go straight to Saegusa-senpai’s room, where he’s all tucked away!”

(Location: Starmony Dorm (Ibara, Mitsuru, Midori, Tsumugi's Room))

Rinne and Yuuta: “(Whispering) Pardon the intrusio~n.”

Yuuta: “Uwah, it’s so dark~. Kiryu-senpai, please watch your step.”

Rinne: “If you were to fall loudly and wake him up, everything would be ruined.

So, where could our Hebi-chan be sleeping? Is it this bed? Or this bed? …… No, he’s over there.

Oioi, take a look at that bed, Yuta, Dora-chan. There’s someone sleeping in it wrapped up in a thick blanket.

I never thought the top idol Ibara Saegusa of Eden would be the type to sleep all snuggled up like that.

He’s surprisingly cute in some ways, isn’t he, Yuta♪”

Yuuta: “Yeah it’s actually kinda cute……

But this is no time for yapping. C’mon, Rinne-senpai!”

Rinne: “Let’s do it. Let’s get right to the main dish then.

—That’s why you’ve all gotta see it! The top idol, Ibara Saegusa’s, adorable sleeping face will finally be revealed!

Now, let’s get a peek! A happy morning’s come, ‘venomous snake’-kun♪

…… Wh- huh?”

Yuuta: “Is that a mannequin!? That’s not the Vice Prez at all, Rinne-senpai!”

Rinne: “OI OI OI, what the heck’s going on? You for real confirmed that Vice Prez was snoozin’ in his room, didn’t ya?”

Kuro: “Yeah. Actually, there’s been some strange noises for a while now.”

Yuuta: “Maybe…… The sound we heard was from the mannequin?

Eh, this……!?

IS THAT A BOMB!?”

Previous | Directory | Next

[whosmarii]

Nefer.

Summary:

Maybe the only way you can learn about your powers is with shock therapy. You didn't even know the extent they have. So S.H.I.E.L.D decided to send you on a mission they belived not to be Avenger typa deanger, they were wrong. Marc Spector case seems to be much more profound and obscure that it appears.

*This chapter is just a preface (it literally says prologue lol) so take that into account,

*Reader is fem and already has a name (you are Nefer dear), but you can like completely ignore that name and use yours.

Prologue.

It is 4am. You usually wake up at that hour, the training is beyond all bearing and you already state that you'll never use pills to the stress cause by it.

" You have to be able to control your brain on your own Nefer, if not, you'll have to be put down." That's what Nicholas Fury told you when S.H.I.E.L.D take you in. You think just like him, what it's going to be of you if your wellbeing depends on a pharmacist with a chemical engineering degree who just wants to capitalize on your suffering so that you buy more of his Lorazepam.

Anyways, he wasn't refering to that when he said that sentence. Nicholas meant that you need to be able to control your powers, so you can finally be a confirmed Avenger.

It's frustrating, seeing everyone around you having a symbiosis with their supernatural abilities. Even Peter with just 15 years did it in less than a week. But you couldn't do it in 19 years, not even when 5 of those years consisted on studying your might, a fucking failure.

In fact, if it weren't for Tony, Bruce and their test, today you would still not know the label of your powers. Apparently you can somehow work with Love and beauty but we don't exactly know the dimension of this. You always suspected it tho.

"Denisse could you take care of Nefertiti for a few minutes, please?" Said Carmela, Nefertitis mother, leaving the living room leaving no place for a response. "Aren't you the most cute girl hm?" said aunt Denisse looking right at the baby of 1 year old in front of her. The little girl stretched her arms to try and touch her belly. "Oh, you like my t-shirt? look it has color pink! you like color pink right Nefi?" Nefertiti smiled at her, trying to say something but failing because of her lack of speaking ability, still she managed to mumble some words, or an attempt of them. "baba- babs-bybybyby" "Baba? papa? you want your daddy? your dada? i'll go find him baby" baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby. That was the word. baby, baby, baby, baby. "baba- babababa- byyy-baaaa by- baby-baby-baby" the child yelled the word alone in the living room. Of course the sound alerted the whole family making everyone run towars the living room, just to find Nefer repeting the word baby with her eyes closed. "I can't belive this... Anton, get the camera! Nefer is saying her first word!!!" said the mother of the little girl to her husband, kneeling in front of her to praise her for her intelligence. Meanwhile aunt Denisse remaind standing in the doorframe with a frown on her face. Nefertiti's first word was baby and she was uncontrollably saying it, now with her eyes open looking right on hers. A few seconds later Carmela notice the weird behavior, she thought that maybe Denisse or her husband were making silly faces and movements so her baby would look at them. But when she looks backwards the only thing she sees is her sister touching her belly. "Baby in here?" mutters Denisse while pointing at her belly. Nefertitis smile gets bigger and she starts nodding with her head. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. "Are you pregnant..?" "Yes."

Your mother would always tell you that story. How did you know your aunt was pregnant? no one knows, no, actually you do now. You guess that it is one of your abilities. You don't exacly know how the fuck could could you use that for an Avenger mission but at least you knew it was your thing.

Your family also told you storys about how you would talk about couples that weren't actually together and years later got married. At first everyone thought that maybe you could see the future but that wasn't it.

Or about the many times people would do what you told them to do just because you were the prettiest girl they ever saw. And i'm talking about an extreme dimension. People doing ilegal things on autopilot just because a pretty 7 year old girl told them to.

Bruce says that you have some type of higher intelligence when it comes to femenine aspects like fertility and love and that you clearly have some type of absolute beauty that if you learn how to use, it could be very powerful.

But for now, you are useless. You can't be on Avengers missions if you don't know when are your powers going to strike and in who are they going to strike. That's why you have to wake up at 4 am every day to train your powers. That's what you been doing for the last 5 years.

And that definitly has to change now.

[gravehags]

how would the different papas and ghouls/ghoulettes comfort you after a nightmare? Cause it’s not even 4am I just had a bad one and I feel like shit garbage.

I’m sorry you had a nightmare :( hope this helps 🩵

Primo - holds you close, caresses your hair and murmurs soft words to calm you down. if you’re very distressed he’ll get up and brew you some chamomile tea with bedside delivery.

Secondo - if you weren’t spooning with him before you are now, big arms wrapped around you and kisses on your shoulder. he firmly tells you that he’s here and nothing is going to hurt you. you believe him.

Terzo - threatens the nightmare, which makes you smile. kisses the corners of your lips and your forehead, whispering words of comfort in italian along your hairline, trying to make you laugh by being silly.

Copia - asks if you want to talk about it. if you say yes he’s attentively listening, if you say no he’s fine with that too. either way he wraps you in his arms and rubs your back, humming your favorite song. he knows them all.

Cumulus - immediately awakens with you and before you can even tell her what’s wrong she’s cooing comforting words at you, forehead pressed to yours. offers to bring you something to help you settle down but nothing works as well as being in her arms.

Cirrus - gently but firmly reminds you that it was just a dream, as awful as it was, but it ultimately can’t hurt you. she would never let anything hurt you and she tells you so as she kisses your hands again and again.

Sunshine - like Terzo, tries her best to make you laugh, even a little. she slides her hand under whatever top you’re sleeping in and traces designs on your back in an effort to calm you down and get you back to sleep. when it works, she stays curled up with you.

Aurora - is just as upset as you are - she could feel something was amiss even as you both slept. strokes your cheeks and hair, reminding you that she’s here and that she’s scarier than any nightmare. nothing will get past her.

Swiss - confused when he wakes up and you’re in clear distress but immediately gets wise and pulls you in close with your head resting under his chin. like Copia, will sing softly to you to lull you back into a calm state. works like a charm.

Aether - if you’re in the middle of it, he’s the one to wake you up and ease you out of it. his hands are gentle on you, thumbs brushing your tears away before engulfing you in his big arms.

Rain - is already awake by the time you stir, clearly upset. like Aurora, he could sense something was off. he lays beside you, your fingers tangled in his as he kisses your tears away.

Dewdrop - sleeps like the dead but when he hears a sob from your side of the bed, nothing can keep him from you. holds you tight - almost too tight - but the strength in his wiry arms keeps you grounded.

Mountain - when you wake up from your nightmare, he’s already engulfed you in his embrace. like Copia, asks if you want to talk about it, all while holding you flush against him.

Phantom - positively befuddled when he wakes up and you’re clearly distressed. takes him a moment to get it and as soon as he sees the fear in your eyes, his arms are around you, whispering apologies and comfort against your ear.

[alovesreading]

hello, i hope you’re doing as well as we all can be. i just wanted to let you know that constant repeat literally changed my life. around a year and half (?) ago i was getting really depressed, anxious, and generally unhappy with…pretty much everything that wasn’t related to alex turner in some way. i have autism and his work (+ miles’s) is my special interest, so i know i’ll reliably be able to cheer myself up just a little if i’m doing anything involving them. one night at 4am, i was trying to find literally anything to keep me occupied so i wouldn’t spiral again. i somehow managed to come across cr. i’m not kidding when i say i read everything that was up (something around 12-14 chapters iirc?) before 6am. it became the reason i woke up every day, i just had to find out what ella and alex were up to and if they’d ever figure out how chronically in love they were. i won tickets to one of the am concerts in my area shortly after that and i reread my favorite chapters to celebrate. i watched all your life updates and chapter updates and i’ve been keeping tabs on you since. i gained more reasons to wake up (ie getting engaged) but i always come back to cr. 💚💚 much love to you.

(ps, sorry for any typos or silly formatting, it’s currently 4am for me. i just wanted to send good things your way with the way things have been)

Anon, this is probably the most special ask I have ever gotten. Nearly brought me to tears.

Constant Repeat was born out of a fight against the claws of depression while stuck working on the road for almost a year. Being in the truck month after month was draining, and the only thing keeping me sane was plotting silly fics on my laptop.

One of those fics ended up being Constant Repeat. I wrote so damn much in such little time, and I thought it would be so stupid to post it but with some encouragement, I gave in.

Never in a million years did I think any of my little made up stories would make an impact on anyone, at least not beyond entertaining people for a bit.

So reading this has just made my heart grow about three sizes in my chest. I’m so proud of you anon, for how far you’ve come and all that you’ve accomplished so far. I’m sending you a billion hugs and all the love in the world. And a massive congrats to you on your engagement!!!! 🥹🥹🥹

Thank you for your support, for being here, and coming back despite the lack of new content. I hope with all my heart to be able to put out something new for Ella and Alex’s story very soon.

Know that when next chapter comes, it’ll be dedicated to you.

Again, thank you for this. Wishing I could hug you through the screen, but I hope you feel the ghost hug while reading this 🤍🤍🤍

[weird-bookworm]

oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndromeeeerfjfkfjfjfkfirioeeitiirifirruroifir hi sky ᕙ( : ˘ ∧ ˘ : )ᕗ imu ...

im srry i dont reach out as much ss i do !! but u will b happy to know that i have a normal person sleeping schedule,, somewhat,, i tend to sleep before 8 and wake up at 12 or 4am . i also find it silly to talk like an idol on bubble uuahhh and kaomojis :3 uueuushsususudjjdjdjdhd aaahhhhhhhhhhh oh my girl jumuneul georeo say that's my girl lucky girl syndrome

; 🌂

wha—

weiss what even 😭

i miss u too my love, and its not like i reach out either so sorry too 😭😭

im glad tht is ur sleeping schedule ans i hope it'll be normal someday 😃 im sure somebody out there enjoys ur bubble this way lmao 🫶🏻 (i think...? idk how bubble works 💀)

[k0r3-h34rt]

sometimes I feel so fucking stupid. So useless. Worthless.

Why can't I just be normal. Why can't I sleep. Why can't I just close my eyes and wake up in the morning. Why and I always up at 1am. 2am. 3am. 4am.

Why do I simply not sleep some nights.

Why can I not remember.

Why do I not remember.

Why can I not be normal.

Why. Why WHy. WHY? WHY AM I LIKE THIS. WHY AM I SO FUCKING MESSED UP.

Why can't I just function properly. Why do I have to have so many issues. Why can't I have a properly functioning body. Why do I always have to be in pain. Why can't my ears work properly. Why don't my eyes see normally. Why do I have to be like this. Why am I in this body. Why can't I be normal. Why can't I just be a girl. Or have a boys body. Why do I have to be this dysphoric, depressed, fucked up epicentre. Why do I have to be a boy in a girls body. Why can't anyone love me for me. Not for my tits. Not for my body. Not for the attention. Not for the pity. Not for the fucked up experience. Why can't someone just love me. Why am I never enough. Why.

Why do I always hurt. Why must I ache so deeply with no cure. Why must I live. Why do I have to care. Why can't I just not care about others. Why am I such a fucking coward that I can't drive a knife through my chest and finish this nightmare. Why can't I wake up from this horrific dream.

Why was I punished for trying to be kind. I simply wanted to give them a friend. I guess I found out why they had none. Why must I be haunted by my actions committed with the purest heart and the kindest intentions.

Why couldn't my attempts have worked. Why did my attempts never work. Why were they all too weak. Why am I too weak. Why can't I just end this nightmare. Why do I have to care that it would hurt others. Why do I care that people would cry. Far more people would never even know. It's getting bad.

I know if I take my meds I'll feel better. But do I even want to.

Life sucks. People suck. I'm lonely, I'm hurt. No one sees me for me. No one thinks of me. They think of the person they want me to be when they look at me.

I want to read and make art and write. But whats the point.

There are days where I can barely get out of bed. There are days I don't. My teeth are yellow. I can't stand in the shower. I don't know how humour works. I bluescreen when people say something I don't have a programmed response to. My limbs feel wrong. I want to tear my ribs from my chest. I want to hurt myself again. I want to feel the comforting sting of my blade instead of this hollow void. this yearning emptiness inside me. this. nothingness I feel.

I keep thinking of what my psychiatrist has said to me. "People see scars like that and go 'oh she's crazy' dont cut, because you dont want people to think you're crazy right?" "You can't have a mental illness till you're in your late twenties, you can exhibit symptoms, but I can't diagnose you silly." "You can't have that issue, it's so obvious in people when they have it" "You're crazy" "You just have to cut people out if they're a shark"

LIKE I FUCKING KNEW SHE WAS A TOXIC PERSON SUSAN. I WAS 10. SHE THREATENED TO HURT HERSELF, TO KILL HERSELF IF I LEFT. IF I DIDNT LET HER TOUCH ME SHE'D CRY AND ASK IIF I HATED HER. IF SHE WASNT GOOD ENOUGH. I WAS FUCKING 10 SUSAN. I CANT FIGHT EMOTIONAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE THAT KEEPS ME IN A SEXUALLY AND PHYSICLALY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP SUSAN. I was 10. How was I meant to be able to deal with that. I see my friends go through similar things, years later. at an age where they're mature enough not to shatter.

I want to die

I want it to end

I want to kill myself

I want to run a knife through my chest

I want to take all my prescription meds in one go

I want it to be over

I want to be at peace

I just want some peace

please

end me

I want a moment of freedom. from the pain. the memories. the ache. the numbness. the void. the thing eating away at me inside.

I CAN STILL FEEL HER HANDS ON IN OVER TOUCHING ME

i just want it to stop