#very shittily done

[bonnies-trash-corner]

Do ya'll want a compilation of shitty louigan sketches?

cuz you got it

[bogor-o]

gimme cotl doodle requests to do so I can be distracted

[feeshies]

i wonder if the trans man i met in my early fandom days who said "genderbends are inherently transphobic and trans people are always begging people to stop" has since wondered if that statement fucked up other people's gender journeys (i.e. mine)

[watermelon-mafia]

stop staring at me with them big ol' eyes!

[virfu]

Godddd I don't know how I'm gonna organize these posts. Do I post them tomorrow? I'm genuinely nervous! Like my stomach hurts lmao

[buglvr24]

this has probably been done before and i did this very fast and shittily but

[rowanthestrange]

Another reason I think it’s right? Doctor Who Is A TV Show theory was our first thought. That the Master would be the one running it was a first thought.

Our other first thoughts were stuff like: The Salt making beliefs real will be the ‘big bad’; the One Who Waits will be Death; the Doctor as god of life; Ruby’s mum is just some woman.

So actually our first thoughts seemed to pan out, so we should probably trust those instinctive pulls.

We know Doctor Who Is A TV Show but not yet for what purpose. I raise to you:

The Master is directing it (probably Dungeon Master style - you can manoeuvre pieces but not fully control them). The Master named himself for a reason, thus in a world of Salt he is The Master. He has temporarily written himself out while he works, and keeps adding references to himself.

Obvious nitpick is ‘Why wouldn’t he make himself the main character?’

…But what if he tried to make the main character into himself.

The next logical step along the path Dhawan!Master was walking on.

I hypothesise these episodes were intended by the Master to start gaslighting the Doctor into thinking he’s the Bad Guy/Devil i.e. him.

Your ship is a Devil’s ship. (And you’re both shagging her).

“A storm is coming” used to describe Sutekh, “the oncoming storm” famously describing the Doctor.

The Doctor became superstitious he brought death, superstitions are canon, so now the TARDIS literally brings Death.

The Master’s Vainglorious theme being used with Sutekh-in-the-TARDIS and Sutekh manifesting.

“I must become a monster.”

“The Lord god Death itself” - didn’t need the ‘Lord’ there but ok.

“And that’s how you win Sutekh, because you’ve turned me into this!”

“I am the one that brings death.”

So if via forceful mirroring, the Doctor can be made to believe he’s the Bad Guy/devil, he will become the Master.

Then the Master gets to show up and be the main character, Doctor Who.

And if he can’t do that? Well, at least the Doctor’s show is now over.

[aachria]

The long awaited (maybe? Idk how many of you were waiting for this) SSSBMTY College AU!

Majors in bold

Headcanons in regular text

Notes about the art indented in orange

Luffy — Undeclared

Was forced into school by his gramps. (The university dean. The fucking dorm building all the Strawhats but Jimbei live in is named after him.)(it was this or join the navy.) Takes the most random classes he can. Some of them are advanced and require perquisites and no one knows how he keeps getting into them. Wears shorts and sandals in winter & will run any errand or do any odd job for food. He has a very nice bike he got for free from a garage sale that Franky fixed up. There's a campus wide bet on when and what he'll choose as his major. His bucket hat was a gift from Shanks, the universities World Economics prof. Has a million friendship bracelets on his ankles because Ed makes them when they're stressed. Never has a bag on him. Fights Canadian geese on the way to class, like a fucking maniac. Protected species who?

When I tell you that this drawing of Luffy is the first time I've ever drawn actual feet with toes that don't look fucking ridiculous I need to cheer for me. Why is he a different flavour of boy every time I draw him please. His ass isn't rubber in this universe, of course he's scuffed to shit. Chopper ran out of Spiderman bandaids, sorry bud. Advocate for the Single Piercing Luffy™ agenda, he went and got it done with Ed when they got their helix.

Ed — English major Psychology minor

Took History of Piracy for easy grades & a story idea. Known around campus as that asshole who'll tell you exactly which of your roommates ate your leftovers for $5. Is roommates with Luffy because of a system mix-up when they got distributed. Always wears a Burberry trench coat Nami thrifted for $3 and gave them as a bday gift. Carries everything in a ratty falling apart messenger bag. Them and Luffy filled out marriage papers on a dare, Zoro (who got legally ordained on a dare minutes before) oversaw that, Zoro and Ed filed the papers when they were drunk. So Ed and Luffy are legally married. And they don't even notice until tax season and Jonah, Ed's accounting friend, asks about it.

I need you to ignore the inconsistence with the hands in these ok? Some of them get very nice and normal hands, and others get weird shaped blobs. Sorry Ed, them's the breaks kid.

Zoro — Health and Fitness major Mathematics minor

Literally no one knows why he has a Mathematics minor, least of all him. P sure he walked into the wrong class on the first day and just stuck with it. The most terrifying captain of the kendo team the university has ever had. He's won more championships and trophies in his tenure than the school has in its history, the revenue he brings in from sponsorships and such make them turn a blind eye to his... eccentricities (three sword style. Nobody has stopped him yet, anyone who says it's illegal gets penalized). Has had campus security called on him so often from being creepy when walking home from the gym in the dark there's a poster of him in the security office that says 'NOT ACTUALLY A THREAT. JUST WEIRD AND WALKS WITH PURPOSE.'

Zoro's sword patch on his jacket was designed by Usopp, embroidered by Luffy for a class (shittily) and fixed up and sewn on by Ed. Those docs have seen war. He has put them through hell. He has walked through a fucking river with those things, he superglues them back together every time they break. Franky had to strongarm him into getting the soles professionally replaced.

Nami — Meteorology major Finance minor

All of her clothes are thrifted designer things. Regularly terrorizes Value Village employees. Anything she has that isn't thrifted she gets from the many estate sales she plagues, snatching grandma's entire Chanel collection and all her nicest jewelry. She has absolutely everything anyone could ever need in her purse. Tampons and pads? She gotchu. Extra pens? It'll cost you, but yeah. A curling iron? Sure, why the hell not. She runs the betting pool on Luffy's major with Ed. She also writes a gossip column for the school newspaper and has a podcast she uploads a new episode to every few months. Shows up to every class looking like a supermodel no matter the time. 7am? Perfect. 10pm? Fabulous. Your go-to if you get locked out of your dorm. Has a moped but barely uses it.

Nami's bag is a large Prada Gallaria Saffiano bag, which I painstaking drew to accuracy down to the colour even though it still looks ever so slightly different, because Nami is a big purse girl. The compass rose necklace was a going away gift from Nojiko when she left for uni. I think her haircut is so cute I love her sm. Don't pay any mind to how fucking disheveled half of their lineart looks next to her pls.

Usopp — Graphic Design major

Not a member of the archery club, but shows up enough he’s in all the team photos. Was originally the designated driver, had a pretty little mini van they called the Merry, had one of those fucking fuzzy dice hanging mirror things in the shape of a sheep’s head. Got in a bad car accident and she got totaled by some jackass in a red Honda Civic. Dating Kaya, who’s a nursing student. They barely see each other because she’s so fucking busy and half the students are convinced the girlfriend Usopp is always talking about and calling is fake. The Strawhats have a dnd campaign that they run every other week, Usopp DM's. On weekends he works at an axe throwing range and holds the record for most bullseyes in a row. They have his picture mounted on the wall.

Usopp's necklace is the old key to the Merry, and he engraved his belt buckle for a project. I cursed his ass with the giant fuck off portfolio bag because those things are so big and unwieldy. The people in his program's studio never clean their paint up properly, that's why he's covered in it. Advocate for the Usopp With Gages™ agenda. God he is such a cutie patootie.

Sanji — Business degree

Literally grew up working in a restaurant, he’s only going to school to get the degree so he can open his own and also because Zeff threated to castrate him if he didn't get a higher education. Cooks basically every single meal for the dorm, since it’s just the Strawhats (it's a new (old it's old and was refurbished. Everyone assumed it was haunted.) building that they just dedicated to Garp. Has no other residents yet). Him and Zoro fight so much in their shared room half the time he ends up kicking him out and making him sleep in the community room lmao. He just shows up in half the culinary classes because he hates the business ones so much, the one time someone tried to tell him to leave he cussed them out for a full ten minutes while gesticulating wildly with a knife in hand. They never tried that again. Saw one of the profs berate a young lady for wearing a dress shirt to class because it’s impractical and proceeded to take that personally. Yeah he wears three piece suits to all his classes, he could still kick you ass in ‘em. Shut up. Volunteers to show around foreign exchange students because he can speak at least 4 foreign languages fluently. Is it to woo pretty French girls with his charm? Wouldn't you like to know.

I could not draw Sanji in a decent pose for the life of me, his ass was just not having it. He's got one of them really nice leather messenger bags with the lined pockets and filigree, he's very proud of it.

Chopper — PreMed

One of the few Strawhats who regularly sees Usopp’s reclusive girlfriend, and is very confused as to why people think she isn’t real. Still a literal child (is 15 still a child? Yeah that's like barely a teenager), a goddamn prodigy and got in with an incredibly good recommendation from the best doctor in the country, who just so happens to be his adoptive mother. He’s literally too cute for anyone to question that, plus he’s the sharpest tack in the damn class. He knocked his front tooth out ages ago (it was an adult tooth) but he's too fucking busy to get an appointment to get it fixed, just adds another layer to his babyface. Nice girls keep asking him if he's here to go see his parents or older siblings, he's endlessly infuriated by it and Sanji is endlessly jealous. Saved Ed from choking to death in a Domino's parking lot the first time they met, he dropped his pizza doing it so they bought him another. The rest is history. Does not feel cold, wears chunky boots year round. Got them reflective ass eyes like a deer, no one has ever taken a good picture of this child. He looks fucking possessed in his school ID.

TELL ME WHY I ALMOST FORGOT TO DRAW CHOPPER. I finished drawing Franky and was like "gee, only Brook and Jimbei to go! Good for me," and then I had to pause while looking as the picture of the group I was semi-referencing for heights n shit and was like "OH FUCK THE CHILD—" He's so cute tho. He's giving lil baby Goro Akechi. The argyle sweater vest and Timbs were a must, so was his hockey boy haircut. Matching backpack and tie for the win. Oh and the freckles, Chopper with freckles is everything to me.

Robin — Has a million hyper specific degrees. Currently earning her third doctorate.

Very mysterious and sexy. Mature student who occasionally gives lectures in the archeology program when she has free time. Owns a motorcycle but barely rides it. How is she not in debt after so much schooling? Don't fucking ask if you want to live. Is that why she lives in the dorm building? Do. Not. Ask. She and Luffy attend the same Theology class, no one knows how Luffy is passing with such good grades, but Robin is adamant that he doesn't take notes or borrow hers, and takes to having the same scores as him with grace. Child actor on one of those show like Barney (but not Barney dear lord) or Reading Rainbow and people only knew her as 'that kid with the creepy fuckin stare.' She was a meme a few years back, they called her the devil child. Every time someone asks her about it she just says she has no idea what they're talking about while giving them the creepy stare.

Women with Big Bags truther, right here. Robin deserves to be put in a suit. Goddamnit, get that woman in a suit!

Franky — Has a bachelors of Engineering, a bachelors of Architecture, and is earning his (water specific) Architecture degree

Currently the groups designated driver (after the tragic death of the poor Merry) with his supped up SUV, the Sunny. How do all the Strawhats fit inside? The power of love, obviously. That car will NOT fucking move if even one of the seatbelts is undone. Made Ed and Luffy wedding rings after he found out they accidentally got married. (Only after laughing for a half our straight, almost passing out, and laughing again. Then he cried for another hour about how beautiful it was.) He sometimes works as a nude model for life drawing classes on campus. Half of the the Strawhats have, in one way or another, seen him in the buck. Has knee braces from an... incident... with a train when he was younger. Now he volunteers at KidsAbility and has a shift on the campus crisis/suicide hotline. Huge advocate for mental health services at the school. He lives in the dorms for the ✨experience✨. Even worse than Luffy, mf wears booty shorts in the dead of winter. He's constantly dressed like It's laundry day. One of those guys from a famous Vine when he was younger that just gets stopped while he's walking so people can go "TRAMPOLINE VASE GUY??" (Iceberg was recording. I love Iceberg.)

Yes Franky is wearing an I ♥ MILFs shirt, what of it? It was a gift. Drawing him was an exercise in struggling with the pompadour and getting uncomfortably close to drawing Syndrome. Yes, he's cold all the time. No, he will not stop.

Brook — Literally no one knows. Something music related probably.

Fucker has been around forever, there’s old ass profs who swear to god they went to school with him and he hasn’t aged a day. Regularly plays local bars and cafes. Doesn't own a cellphone, he can literally only operate rotary phones. Computers confuse the shit out of him. Knows nothing about pop culture or recent events, but is up to date on everything in the music industry. He sometimes helps organize the old library archives because he's somehow the only person who understands the system they're organized in. Sometimes he'll just namedrop a famous singer/band he's either played with, done karaoke with, or done background vocals/instrumentals for and you have to guess whether he's telling the truth or just saying shit. There's a campus wide betting pool (run by Nami and Ed, go figure) on whether he's a vampire, ghost, time traveler, or Dorian Gray in disguise. Prepares the questions for 70s night pub trivia. Every time the Strawhats plan a ghost hunt he's busy, then at the end they find out that all the paranormal shit they've been experiencing is just him running his errands. It's happened at least four times.

Is Brook off-putting enough? I was trying to make him off-putting. He swears up and down the neck tattoo was gotten on a dare by Elton John, what, you gonna question a man who looks like he stepped out of Coraline? The skeleton gloves were a gift from Ed.

Jimbei — Has already graduated as a Marine Biology major Political Science minor and is taking both a Gender Studies course and a Peace and Conflict Studies course years later.

Teaches martial arts at a local dojo on weekends and volunteers with the martial arts team on campus. Robin helps him organize protests on weekends. He's good buds with a lot of the faculty and gets invited to after work drinks regularly. He helped establish a program that walks people who stay late at the library to their dorms when he was first a student that's still going strong to this day. Lives off campus and has the Strawhats over for BBQ on long weekends. Literally the only time the Strawhats eat food not made by Sanji. The Grill Master™. Somehow holds some kind of record or high score at every single bar/pub in town. Knows every single mailman and janitor by name. MVP of the catch and release fishing club, helps plan all of their trips.

I struggled with him. I struggled hard. That's a man who went his whole childhood with a horrendous underbite and only got it fixed once he was an adult. Ed gave him the fishing lure earrings out of guilt after he brought them on one of his fishing trips and they fell in and nearly capsized their boat. IT'S A REUSED PLASTIC BAG JIMBEI IS RESPONSIBLE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT—

[starzwithapen]

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘˗ˏˋ ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ ˎˊ˗∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

JOHN DORY / READER ☆ START A LOVE TRAIN

જ⁀➴.𖥔 ݁ ˖༉‧₊˚.

☆Summary: John Dory's first meeting with Rhonda and her owner, you!

☆Content: reader is gender neutral, first meeting!! Gonna make a part 2 exploring their relationship more :3

☆a/n: I FUCKING HATE HIM [affectionate] my first worrkk pls leave feedback if youd like it helps a ton!! :3

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘˗ˏˋ ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ ˎˊ˗∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

The day John Dory met you and Rhonda was simultaneously one of the worst and best days of his life.

He'd been hiking- nothing out of the ordinary for him, maybe one venomous spider he'd had to fight off, but so far so good! The sting of the cold air against his cheeks quelled his thoughts, made him feel accomplished, in a way.

But he must've been distracted- he was a little more careless than usual, overestimating his own strength and struggling to pull himself upwards, his legs dangling over the edge- he could feel a tick of nerves in the back of his mind, but pfftt, John Dory's got this! He's done this a million times-

Next thing he knows, the rock holding his legs up collapses, and down he goes with it, tumbling over harsh terrain while the wind rushing past his ears drowns out his yelling.

After many very painful seconds of straight up rolling down this cliff, John Dory groans in pain, dusting himself off and pushing himself upwards, except- oh, shit, okay, ow, something’s very wrong with his ankle.

He hisses and grabs onto the skin, pulling his goggles up to inspect it- it appears swollen, and he realises with a frustrated groan that he'd managed to twist his ankle miles away from the nearest safe-house.

Well- looks like he'll have to camp outside for the night, wouldn't be the first nor last time, but it'll be significantly more difficult with a leg that refuses to cooperate with you.

He rushes through setting up camp, wanting to just sleep the pain off till his foot got better, but just as he sets his head down on the pile-of-leaves-that-vaguely-resemble-a-pillow, he hears distant rustling.

That's not odd- it'd be weirder for the forest to be quiet, if anything, animals are always trudging along no matter the time of day- what's odd is how loud the sound is, feet papping against the floor in heavy strides, coming closer and closer towards him.

John Dory sits up in a flash, suddenly regretting how shittily he'd camouflaged his camp- his eyes widen towards the oncoming noise, having just enough time to snatch a stick and hold it out threateningly, though his hands shake and tremble.

“Hey! I have a- uh, a really sharp stick, and I'm not afraid to use iiIIITTT-”

The stick goes flying out of his grasp, and he gets the breath absolutely slammed out of him as something huge jumps onto him, rumbling atop him and- eugh, was it licking him?! Was this how he died, after all these years?! Eaten alive by a-

“Down, girl- stop that, you're scaring him!” the thing finally lets up on trying to swallow him whole, standing back on its hind-legs and cooing at you excitedly, and it's then that he notices you.

“Gods, I'm really sorry- she's not usually like this-” you reach over with a grimace to wipe the wet mess of saliva and glitter off his cheeks with your sleeve, and all JD can do is stare at you, star-struck. One minute he was facing his impending doom, and now he was facing the prettiest person he'd ever set his eyes on, and though he's certain it's night time he feels as though you're shining the sun's rays straight at him.

You smile nervously and pat his attacker's leg, “She wasn't actually going to eat you- or at least I don't think she was? You can never quite tell with Rhonda.”

Okay, John Dory had lived on his own amongst nothing but the trees and mountains for years, so excuse him for not being particularly eloquent when all he blurts out is “John.”

You and Rhonda blink at him comically for a moment, and he feels his cheeks flush under his fur-lined vest. No one's ever caught him off gaurd like this before.

“That's…not my name, but good guess anyways.” You check over him as if he's concussed, and he tries not to frown at the scrunch in your nose as you take in his camp.

“It's my name- John Dory.” He flashes you a charming smile, though he assumes the effects are dampened by the mess of glitter and dirt still smeared across his face, “and can I get yours, or can I just call you mine?”

Silence stretches on between you both, his smile getting more strained by the minute- why hadn't that worked? That always worked, at least when Spruce did it! You were supposed to be- swooning, or something! Not looking at him like he's sprouted a second head!

You cut through the tension with a gasp, and he follows your gaze down to his badly-damaged leg, now with extra bloodied scrapes, “Oh god, that looks rough- did Rhonda do this?” He doesn't have time to tell you that no, actually, it wasn't your fault, when you turn around and scold your…armadillo? He feels his lips quirk up- you looked pretty cute like that, like a disgruntled parent.

“Well, you can come inside and I'll wrap it up for you- you shouldn't leave it out in the open like that.” You wave him over, grabbing onto his hand to pull him into the door, and he feels his skin burn pleasantly where you both touch.

And that's how it starts. JD walks inside the armadillo bus, Rhonda, marvelling at the warmth. Though you hadn't given him your name yet, he felt as though he could trust you- you seemed like someone who values honor and helping others, however bluntly or awkwardly you may go about it.

You wrap his leg with gauze and a healing salve, and he fills the room with chatter- it'd been so long since he'd last seen another soul, he didn't realise just how…lonely he'd felt. You don't speak much of yourself, probably staying cautious, but you do seem curious about his stories, and the twinkle in your eye urges him to speak with a little more pomp than usual.

Your voice turns more concerned as you ask what he'd been doing camping out in the open like that- he'd told you of the trail he planned to follow, though he'd skipped the part where he fell off-course. He tells you of how he'd wanted to end up somewhere warmer by the time winter really hit, sighing to himself. “I'll just have to stock up on fire-wood, maybe invest in a flame-thrower.”

“I mean….we can take you there.” You offer in a quiet voice, your gaze stubbornly set on the floor, “It's still a pretty long drive, but better than 2 months walking on a sprained ankle, especially with how gnarly it looks.”

John Dory's conflicted- the offer sounds heavenly. He pictures waking up to your warmth day by day, helping you gather breakfast, travelling with a companion, for once, but….he'd left to the middle of nowhere for a reason. He wanted to distance himself from his old habits, his old expectations of himself and others.

Though….you seemed to be just as- if not more- capable than him. He wouldn't need to be a pillar for you to lean all your weight against, nor the pressure that turns coal into shining diamond- you two could simply…have each other's backs. Maybe…maybe this could work out, at least for a little while.

John Dory tilts his head up and takes one look at your welcoming smile to make up his mind.

"Can't say no to your pretty face, now can I?"

This time you snicker behind your hand at his awful flirting, but he catches it just in time- and he knows this'll be the start of something great.

[mamawardentotherescue]

Okay, so I've slept and gathered my thoughts more and I'm going to explain why I don't like da:v (because some of you have assumed a lot about me and my relationship with the series)

First off, I have been in love with dragon age since I was 13/14 and have been obsessed with it for 12 years. It was my muse for writing and creating art; I read every book I could get my hands on and lived on the wiki and forums for everything else; when I got my first pay check I bought the lore books (which was hard to find in Australia). When I was depressed or so lonely my heart felt like it would burst, I would come back to the companions I would call friends. This game saved me from killing myself more times than I could count.

I have loved this game series for all it's writing and lore - the good, the bad, and the ugly. So, for me to be upset and disappointed in this game is not to be taken lightly.

Straight up, da:v felt wrong (I'm not going to mention why I don't like the inquisitor creator because I feel like at this point you should know why). They launch you straight into the middle of a plan your character has apparently known all along, but it left me feeling confused. I had so many questions! It's been 8 years since Trespasser, 10 years since the beginning of Inquisition and 20 for Origins; a lot has changed and I want to know what's happened in thedas since I've been away because I've invested a lot of time with that world, regardless of whether or not you respect my input on the world building...but the writing doesn't care about that.

I had a constant thought of "they're trying to recreate Mass Effect but have forgotten why people play Dragon Age, and they're not even respecting ME while they do it" and the more hours I put in to this game the more obvious this became.

"But MamaWarden, it looks so pretty and the combat is fun!" I hear you say, and yes, I do agree. The game was built really well in comparison to past games, but good hair isn't a good enough distraction from shit writing and a lack of respect for the series.

Before finishing the game I would often say that the best part about the game was the companions. They felt familiar and I enjoyed what I had with them but wished I had more. I was prepared to stick with that until they made me choose between Harding or Davrin (and Assan)...

Let me explain very simply why I fucking hated this:

1. It was another "look at us trying to be Mass Effect" moment but done shittily

2. Feels sus to say the least to pin Harding, the first female dwarf we've been allowed to romance and have a pre-existing relationship with (as the player), against Davrin, the first black elf we've encountered that wasn't just an OC of the player

3. Doesn't matter if you complete their companion quests, gain max approval and send what I would argue the "right" one to survive to a mission, only to have that person die because they were the other group's leader

As soon as it happened and the companion (I felt like I was forced to choose because I was romancing the other) was killed, I felt like nothing mattered. Again, it felt like someone tried to recreate the OG ME trilogy into one game but completely misunderstood what made those games ironically heart wrenching. I wasn't given a choice where I knowingly sacrificed a companion the way they did with Ashley and Kaiden, I was instead given a "who do you think will be best for the job?"

You might think it's a taste or preference thing, but it's not. It's a "dragon age has followed a particular pattern that's different to mass effect but now they've subverted expectations" type of thing. I might be autistic, but doesn't that bother you?

I hated that unless you were romancing Solas, your inquisitor really doesn't matter much to the story. I hated that your Lavellan felt like she was reduced to an additional underling to Solas instead of being his equal. I hated that characters like Mae, Dorian, Isabela and the Inquisitor had NOTHING to say about Varric, regardless of whether everyone knew the truth about him or not. I hated that bioware spewed "no unnecessary cameos" but barely used the old companions for anything useful outside of Varric and Solas pushing the story. I hated that shit is blowing up in the south of thedas but it feels like no one cares except for me, the player who has spent literal years invested into Ferelden and neighbouring countries.

Nothing felt like it mattered and that's the worst part of all of this. That might the intended meta commentary but fucking save it for a different game. This series has always been about hope in times of darkness, but this game feels like it cheapened that ideal and abused it so they can give this half-baked "morally grey" shit of a story and expect us to eat it

[rubra-wav]

Husk x shy/insecure reader? Him helping reader be more confident and to stand up for themself!

Maybe even a lil scene where he calls them out for always agreeing to everything without second thought, calling them naive (and maybe stupid. He is a bit rough). They could react by either crying and confessing they hate conflict and thats why they do that, or they could whisper the confession (no tears, up to you).

Husk x shy/insecure reader : Above Whispers

A/N I wasn't sure if this was supposed to romantic or platonic so I went with platonic, sorry.

I NEED to remake this banner istg

Cw: SFW, gn!reader, Husker is tough loving in his callout (idk how to tag it properly)

- You'd been a resident of the hotel for several months, during this time catching the eye of the resident bartender.

- You quietly did as you were told, never raising your voice even when it was obvious you didn't want to do something or didn't agree with something someone was saying.

- Anything to avoid conflict.

- These things not only irritated the bartender about you but also concerned him.

- He'd pushed several times intentionally testing the waters with you, and you hadn't done a single thing against it, just going along with his will.

- A sinner like you would be taken advantage of sooner rather than later in hell, possibly even by certain other residents.

- On multiple occasions, he had forced more malevolent forces Alastor to stay away from you, but it was clear he'd be working himself until the end of time to keep you from falling into someone's clutches if you didn't actually change yourself.

- Despite Husk's more apathetic side telling him to stay out of it, he confronted you upon it after a long day of group activities, cornering you to speak with you.

- You looked up at Husk in slight discomfort as he stood in front of you in the shittily carpet lined hallway looking very serious. Despite being a rather cute looking demon, all things considered, he was still intimidating.

- "That whole time you were letting that overly obnoxious bleeding heart push you around like a lost puppy." Husk said bluntly.

- You jolted like you'd been zapped at his words, going to try and protest that you just didn't mind, really, but you were cut off short.

- "You aren't foolin' me with the 'oh it's fine' bullshit. Drop it and be honest." Husk took a step forward towards you, watching you starting to shake slightly, eyes going misty.

- You shuffled uncomfortably, looking away with clear discomfort, chest aching at being called out. You just wanted to disappear.

- "..You're right." Your lip quivered as you fought and failed to keep your voice from quivering like the rest of you. "I hate causing issues. It doesn't matter if I'm uncomfortable as long as there's no negative attention on me, I-"

- Husk's hand came to rest on your shoulder, cutting you off from rambling. You looked up to his yellow eyes, clearly a vision of irritation bordered by his bushy eyebrows. "You're naive and fucking stupid." He announced, startling you.

- You sighed heavily, a tear slowly sliding down your cheek. You slowly nodded in agreement after a couple of seconds of heavy silence, prompting the demon's ear to twitch.

- "Dont agree! Fight against me! You need to get over this complete avoidance of confrontation!" Husk pat his hand on your shoulder. "This shit in hell is just going to get you either shackled to someone for all eternity like I am or fucking killed!"

- You were surprised to watch him go from annoyance to seemingly being extremely concerned for your safety so quickly. Husk was concerned about showing as much as well, forcing his face to be a mask of indifference and taking his hand off of you.

- He looked back at you coolly as he turned away to leave. "Do what you want, but don't come crying to me when you end up owned. God knows I have enough suckers whining to me in this dump." He grumbled, walking away with heavy steps.

- You stood in place, thinking about his words and the actions from him that you now registered as him trying to help you out of the situations you had gotten yourself into.

- He was right, and you knew it. It wouldn't be easy to get yourself out of being a yes-man, but.. something inside you had the feeling the overly pessimistic bartender would help you through it.

- Husk on the other hand, was facepalming about it. He just knew he'd be cursing himself for caring about another one.

[erimeows]

The Game That We Play

When Shizune and Shikamaru fall sick in the same week, Kakashi requests Naruto and Sasuke to accompany him as bodyguards to The Land of Iron for the summit. Everyone else is far too busy doing important work in the village for Kakashi to bother them- or, that’s what Kakashi claims. Sasuke swears the man just loves shoving him and Naruto together whenever he can. 

Sasuke is surprised to receive the request in code via carrier pigeon during a long mission in Ame, but he doesn’t question it. Kakashi has done a lot for him- protecting him throughout his childhood, doing everything he could to get Sasuke pardoned, and now, allowing Sasuke to atone for his sins by working outside of the village… Sasuke owes him a lot. The simple task of getting Kakashi to and from the summit in one piece is nothing compared to everything Kakashi has gone through for him. 

So, Sasuke makes the long journey back to Konoha so he can meet Kakashi and Naruto at the village gates. Naruto looks all too happy to see Sasuke, embracing the ravenette in a tight hug the moment he arrives. Sasuke pretends not to enjoy the attention. It’s a game they play- Naruto loves Sasuke far more than he should, and Sasuke acts as if he doesn’t notice even though he returns Naruto’s feelings tenfold. Each time they’ve reunited since the war, the game seems to go a little further. Neither of them say anything. But as much as everyone likes to imply it, Naruto isn’t stupid. 

They walk a long time. It takes a few days to get from Konoha to The Land of Iron, so after traveling from first thing in the morning well into that night, they set up camp in a nearby cave between the two lands. Sasuke knows that they’re getting close to the midpoint due to the cooler weather. 

Kakashi, with a copy of Icha Icha in hand, bows out into their tent for the night, stating that he’s going to go to sleep. For whatever reason, Sasuke doubts that.

With Kakashi ‘sleeping’, it’s just Naruto and Sasuke in the cave. Alone. Very alone. No Sakura or Shikamaru or whoever else to cut through some of the tension between them. Sasuke feels something that he’s only ever felt around Naruto, hot and warm and familiar, bubbling up just beneath the surface of his skin. Affection, fondness. Friendship. That’s what they call it, anyway. It’s easier to mislabel things. 

The two men sit across from each other, a shittily made campfire the only thing keeping them apart. It sits in front of Sasuke’s sandal-clad feet. The light it emits bathes Naruto’s face in an oddly flattering orange glow. 

“What’cha staring at?” Naruto asks, tilting his head. In his left hand he holds a skewer with a piece of seasoned meat on it. He burns it by holding it too close to the center of the flame as he plays dumb. As if he doesn’t know what he’s doing to Sasuke… Well, maybe he doesn’t. No, no, he definitely does. He’s not nearly as stupid as everyone thinks he is. “Do I have something on my face or… Something?”

Sasuke shakes his head. But instead of looking away with a blush, instead of staying silent and moving on to the next thing like neither of them have any idea what their feelings are, he acknowledges it aloud for the first time. He doesn’t know why he does it. 

“You know what it is,” Sasuke murmurs before adding on- “Stupid.”

And Naruto- sweet, easygoing, stupid Naruto- laughs and tilts his head. 

“What, you wanting to talk for once?” Naruto practically chuckles the words out. Sasuke shakes his head again. “Thought so.”

Sasuke looks for an escape to the situation- there’s a ravine right outside the cave that they’re in. It’s running with clear, clean water and they traveled a long ways- a nice, cool bath is what Sasuke needs right now.

“I’m going to go take a bath.”

“Oh, I should come, too!” Naruto says, standing up and gathering a change of clothes. 

Them bathing together isn’t… Completely abnormal. Despite how it makes Sasuke’s heart race, there have been times on missions where it’s been necessary. What is odd is leaving Kakashi completely unguarded.

“What about Kakashi?”

“C’mon, we both know he’s still up in there reading those boring books of his,” Naruto argues, and then calls back towards the tent. “Hey, Kakashi! You good if we go take a bath!?”

“Yes, yes, go on ahead,” Kakashi calls back from inside the tent. “I was going to stay up a tad bit longer anyway. This edition is just so good!”

Naruto turns back to Sasuke.

“Told ya.”

So, they go to the ravine together, walking side by side, both of them with a change of clean clothes, towels, and washcloths in hand. They undress without looking at each other- or, Sasuke thinks they do. He doesn’t look, though he can never be sure about Naruto. Part of him is terrified that he’ll look at Naruto and meet those big blue eyes of his. The other part of him is terrified that he’ll look at Naruto, only for Naruto to not be looking back at him. He isn’t sure which would be worse, and he doesn’t want to find out, so he doesn’t look, even as he hears Naruto haphazardly toss his clothes onto some nearby grass. Sasuke neatly folds up his own clothes and places them atop a large rock.

“Hey,” Naruto speaks up as they sit in the ravine, washing themselves with the fresh water. Sasuke glances up to see that Naruto is, in fact, looking at him. He shamelessly stares back, awe and fire consuming him from head to toe even though the water is ice cold. Naruto’s skin is sunkissed, glowing under the moonlight and noticeably unscathed for a ninja, unlike Sasuke’s which is mapped with scars. “Remember that time we kissed?”

“Which time?” Sasuke murmurs with red cheeks.

“At the academy.”

“Oh,” Sasuke nods. “Yeah. What, wanna do it again?”

There’s a pause, and for a moment, Sasuke wonders if he’s made Naruto uncomfortable- if he’s taken this game too far. But then, he looks over at Naruto to see the man nod.

Sasuke moves- perhaps faster than what is safe in this environment- and catches Naruto by the wrist. They lean in, the warmth of their bodies about to collide when-

“Hey!” Kakashi’s voice calls from the cave. Sasuke and Naruto jump away from each other instantaneously. “Hurry up, you two, I’m going to bed!”

“Heh,” Naruto laughs. “Maybe later.”

As fast as it happened, Naruto is out of the ravine and getting dressed- and then, he’s gone.

~

They arrive at the summit a day and some after their shared bath in the ravine. They’re around countless samurai and other ninja, in an environment far less intimate than that cave or that ravine. Sasuke isn’t sure whether he should be disappointed or relieved.

They sit in the back, watching as the kage discuss different events that have happened since their last summit the year before. Ever since the war, the kage have started meeting annually in an attempt to nip any conflicts in the bud, lest they turn against each other again. Sasuke doesn’t believe it will work for long, but it’s what Kakashi has decided is best, and Sasuke trusts him. 

As the other kage discuss a recent conflict in Suna, their respective guards whisper loudly about how Sasuke shouldn’t be there after what he did five years ago. Sasuke would argue that they’re right, but the prideful side of him wishes he could shut them up. He knows what they’re doing- whispering loudly enough for him to hear in an attempt to provoke him so he’ll never be welcome back if he lashes out at them again, so that he’ll have less of a chance of becoming Hokage. 

Naruto reaches over and places a hand on Sasuke’s shoulder.

And, as always, his touch calms Sasuke down immediately.

They manage to sit through the rest of the summit despite the cruel words of the others there. And then, they leave.

~

As it always goes on the rare occasions where they meet, Sasuke escorts Naruto (and Kakashi) home without a word. Though Naruto looks wistful as they exchange goodbyes at the village gates, he doesn’t dare say anything, instead turning away from Sasuke with a wave and walking with Kakashi in the direction of the Hokage Tower. Sasuke watches them with a smile.  Deep down, he knows that he and Naruto are going to play this game for the rest of their lives- and maybe, just maybe- he’s okay with that.

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

pls pls pls pls pls yap about ur opinions on fanon and the absolute slaughter that has happened to some of these characters!!! oml pleaseeeeee! i'm dying to hear someone who agrees with me cuz so many ppl just don't get it!!!!!!! babe i'll take anything!!!! fanon!remus slander, love it, fanon!regulus slander, live for it, fanon!sirius slander, NEED it!!! if you're feeling really in the mood, maybe marlene?? literally just yap and im yours!!!!!!!

HI ily OKAY SO!!!

fanon remus fuck him man he's so annoying i hate everything about him but TODAY i will be talking about his backstory im sorry its so !!! UGH. so much of the marauders fandom makes him either an orphan (atyd)/give him severe daddy issues and i hate that ?? so much ???

he suffered a lot canonically thru his childhood, but people erase that and give him these new issues that dont go well w his character (at least in the way i've seen it done).

do people not understand having a very lonely childhood + being discriminated against x2 + having low self esteem + etc can give you long term consequences??? do they think the only way one can have trauma/ptsd/etc is if they got beat by their dad?? probably !!! so @ marauders fans fuck you !!! other problems exist lmao they're just not as romanticizable

fanon AND canon regulus. I HATEEE HIM. I DESPISE HIM. I CANNOT. i cannot rant about him rn. it's like 9am and im trying to have a good day.

fanon sirius my bby what did they do to you ☹️☹️☹️

i cant even hate him bc i just feel so bad for him every1 litr hates him+bullies him sm like he doesnt even do anything and like that must be so triggering and annoying and ugh ily bby

but like rant right SAWR

i actually do NOT understand why sirius was changed sm in fics ?? like you could just shittily simplify his char to remus fanon or morally grey bf or smth and thats infinitely hotter+more accurate ??? idk !!!! ive ranted abt him a lot so idk what to yap abt rn IM SORRY ily

MARLENE !!!!!!!!!!!!! marlene. ok i hate her fanon. like fr. why is she the token mean lesbian like ho get a life. her only traits are gay gay & gay and bfr we see the problem w that right. like ugh. + i never see any discrimination she has to face ?? which is weird esp since beabadoobee is a lot of people's fc of her? and shes gay ?? i feel like when u have a char thats just a blank slate you can do sm w it but the marauders fandom just turned her into npc number 14 like fuck u man

[realizinau]

Not a question, but just thought I’d give you this unfinished idea of mine. Feel free to finish it or to just look at it and ha ha at the goofy ahh Hoppy and Unlucky being goofy. I also thought you might like it for motivation purposes. I’ve never done a comic (don’t really know how to format it) but I have done little art/story projects before. Doing something related to it but fun helps me come up with more ideas and motivation for my projects.

OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS? Very Hoppy thing to do, so sorry Unlucky- Hoppy will proceed to shittily sew it back so she doesn't get in trouble😔😔😔

[ladyloveandjustice]

Someone comparing 90's anime Mamoru to women in shonen and saying that's a bad thing annoys me so much, because it's not even true lmao.

First of all, it implies it's SO horrible for one anime in the world to not treat a male character as central. gasp the horror. God forbid a man be treated like a woman is.

second, no he isn't treated like a woman in an average (battle) shonen anime, he's treated much better. the average love interest in a shonen anime doesn't make a dramatic entrance to save the male character in most episodic battles. She would never be considered the male characters cool amazing savior that he gets heart eyes over and he's constantly trying to be good enough to date her.

Like yeah Mamoru gets kidnapped and brainwashed for Usagi to save with more frequency that other male characters, but that literally happens just as much in the manga. Probably the only time his treatment is comparable to a woman in (most) shonen is in Stars, where he's quickly killed off without much of a fight to make Usagi sad and does nothing else besides that. Much like [spoiler] in JJK I guess, only at least Usagi actually cared that he was dead/missing, so still better!

Mamoru is also EXTREMELY involved in the plot the first season and R, in the way a love interest in shonen anime would not get to be. He has extended character arcs in both seasons. A woman in your average shonen anime would not get to be an intimidating villain who is the boss the hero has to face before the big bad and who genuinely beats the hero up a bit. Nor would she be as central in any plot about parenthood- look how the moms in Boruto are treated.

Yeah, the 90s anime doesn't care about Mamoru as much as the girls. Boo hoo. How dare one piece of media in the world not give as much attention to a man. Yes, Naoko gave Mamoru much more prominence, but also focused a bit less on the friendship between the girls than the anime did. It's a tradeoff! Which do you prefer? Neither answer is wrong (though I do think a lot of gay fans are more here for the girls and that's not a bad thing lmao). It's not some great injustice that was done to him, anymore than there's a great injustice done to the non-Usagi girls in the manga. There's just different approaches. And you can't just say anyone on the team had a "disdain" for him without proof. Ikuhara featured him prominently in the R movie, before you take his joke about Mamoru seriously. Mamoru's always very central to Usagi's emotions, if they really had "disdain" for him, why does she think about him so much and miss him so much in Stars?

I'm just saying: don't downplay just how shittily women get treated in male-centered media because you're pressed Tuxedo Mask didn't get his smoking bomber attack. Mamoru has it VERY EASY compared to women in shonen.

[wtchrinthesky]

Summer, Highland Falls

Relationship: Sydney Adamu/Carmen "Carmy" Berzatto

Rating: Unrated, but the constant use of "fuck" might bump it up to Mature

Additional Characters: Natalie "Sugar" Berzatto, Richard "Richie" Jerimovich

Words: ~2.5k

Tags: Hospital Setting, Friends to Lovers (open to interpretation tbh), Songfic (kind of)

Summary: Sydney and Carmy wait to meet Baby Bear.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck!

Expletives are the only thing on Carmen’s mind when he gets the call from Pete that Baby Bear has been welcomed into the world. Rochelle Alexandra, after he and Sugar’s grandmother and Pete’s mom. 3:13am, 8 pounds, 11 ounces. 

Carmy wants to die when he walks into the waiting room. The hospital is warm, almost stifling. Natalie is still recovering, and visitors aren’t technically allowed until eight, relays the gentle woman in scrubs that looks like Claire until he blinks extra hard. He feels a ball of concrete drop in his gut when he meets the scalps of Tina, Neil, Theo, Richie, Sydney, their noses all buried in their phones. Pete had mentioned that Donna was there, too, which made Carmy extra want to die, but the feeling settles the slightest bit in his mother’s absence. He feels guilty for the relief. 

He does not want to be here. 

As the stiff pleather cushion exhales from the weight of his body when he sits, his right foot starts bouncing against linoleum, his fingers worry his cupid’s bow like bricks very shittily falling into place. The Faks are the first (and only) to greet him, boisterous as ever, to which he reciprocates with a nod and a small “hey.” He can’t peel his eyes away from the dove-with-olive-branch pattern on Sydney’s scarf. He wants to kick himself, run for the hills, maybe go and give the third rail of the L a real big hug. He wants to be anywhere other than here. 

He has to be here. He owes it to Nat. He gets that feeling at the nape of his neck, cool and foreboding, the very same that made him observe Mikey’s funeral from the driver's seat of his car. He can’t watch both death and birth from the sidelines. It’s unfair, plain and simple.

Carmy screws his eyes shut and takes a breath, letting the smell of hand sanitizer and the sound of monitors beeping in the distance grab hold of him and yank him toward something more grounding. His eyes open to stare at the fabric wrapped around his chef de cuisine’s braids. It helps. He fucking sucks. God, he sucks. He feels guilty all over again for something he’s not sure of. Familiar voices get distant as they meander out of glass sliding doors for a cigarette. He’d join if he wasn’t absolutely sure he’d book it as soon as his shoes hit concrete.

Somebody coughs. He sits across from his penance, beautiful, wrapped in silk and down-packed pine green polyester. Linoleum walkways split them apart like the Red Sea, a testament to his obsession for perfection. He wants so badly to get a star, to get three, to scoop Michelin galaxies from the fucking skies if it means she’s happy. If it means she’s inspired, if it means she won’t leave. It’s all for her, and that makes things infinitely worse, knowing all he’s done was push her away and make her feel small. 

The consequences of his own actions taunt him, because he loves her, and she does not deserve that. She does not deserve the pollution he brings with everything he does, she does not deserve to be tainted. Barolo Chinato splashes across marble. The setting is ironic considering how fucking sick of himself he is. 

Sydney is running. Sydney is scared, and when she gets scared, she trips over her own feet fleeing. 

The sound of her father’s CPAP machine always made her feel like a coward. Maybe– no, she is definitely one, because even now she’s running. Is there a difference between feeling disrespected and being a quitter? The answer should be obvious, you’re not quitting if it’s out of self preservation, but she always has to make things infinitely more complicated. She digs herself into a hole and then gets mad because she didn’t think she’d need a ladder. Carmy is the same way, she thinks, and gets pissed all over again because he’s been such a dick lately. Like, seriously, she can only pretend to know what’s crawled up his ass and died. She wants to grab him by the ears and shake his head around like a jar of loose pennies. She’s running because she’s scared. Scared of him, i.e., how she feels about him. Scared of what will happen if she stays. Scared of her suspicions being right, that this is more than it really is. 

This is the thing, baby. 

Sydney doesn’t remember her mother very well, but often finds herself looking to her for guidance. It’s innate. The misty words of a lullaby, the only proof Mom ever existed beyond, well, Sydney’s own existence and Polaroids of her smiling face, ring in her mind: Will you carry the word of love with you? Will you ride the great white bird in together?

She constantly has to ask herself if every little thing she does, every choice she makes, are actions of love. The fact that she’s at this hospital at five forty seven in the fucking morning is definitely an action of love. Though, to be honest, it wasn’t like she was sleeping anyways, and newborn babies are kind of the cutest things ever, so it’s not like she’s turning down that opportunity. She has to face the music sometime. 

Her shoe scuffs across white tile and nudges Carmen’s own bouncing foot, willing it to stop. Is this an action of love? He looks up like she’s God and he’s a man that’s lost his faith. He’s always got these big, sad puppy eyes, like he’s surprised that people want shit to do with him. He never looks at her with vitriol, even when he’s over her shoulder during service telling her she’s too fucking slow. Even when he’s blowing up like one of those vinegar and baking soda volcanoes, all red-faced and flailing arms. He doesn’t always look at her soft, but he never looks at her hateful.

Right now, he looks at her like she’s the only thing in the world. It makes her gut tighten, the bile inside it curdle because it’s making it so hard to run. Maybe she wants to stay. Maybe it’d be self-sabotage. Maybe it’d make her a better person in the end. She can’t help wondering if Carmen’s confession under the table was entirely truthful. Sydney doesn’t know if he’s even capable of the truth, considering he’s been lying to himself since he left New York. 

A realization in the form of what feels like her heart growing three sizes just about knocks her off her metaphorical feet, bringing them to a halting stop. She cares about Carmen. Of course she cares about him, she’s cared about him since Eleven Madison Park, but like, she actually fucking cares. She wants to pour all the golden light from deep inside her to her palms and press it into his chest. She wants to free him from his burdens, or at the very least, offer him two extra hands to hold it all. She’ll forgive him over and over again, and it’d be like breathing. She wants to tell him the truth. 

That everything she does with him in mind is an action of love, even if it’s leaving.

“Uh,” She fumbles out instead, in an embarrassing excuse of a peace offering. “I’m doing the Mini. Do you have any ideas about sports organizations involving octagons?” 

Carmen blinks once. Another time. He’s completely thrown for a loop. He’d expected her to just quietly apologize and look back down at her phone. Sydney can tell from his face, once again disbelieving that someone’s making an active effort to talk to him.

“... What?”

“That’s the clue. Sports organization with an octagon.” Her jacket rustles when she shrugs and it’s music to his ears. Carmy sits back and interlocks his hands in his lap after rubbing his brow in thought, like the crossword was life or death. He reels his mind for any sports logos that are shaped like an octagon, and he thinks of ADT for some fucking reason, which is not at all related unless you count home security as a sport. 

Sydney waits for his answer. She’s so patient, and he doesn’t deserve it. If he was her, he would’ve bolted out of the Beef the second he saw his own face. 

“UFC.” He blurts, and a jazzy jingle plays quietly from her phone, and she smiles. He could have a coronary right now and die happy. 

“Nice.” Sydney praises quietly, her foot drawing back across the aisle to hook around the leg of her chair. It’d be insanely childish to play footsie with her, but it’s all Carmen wants to do if it means she’ll smile again and he gets to know it’s his fault. That he’s done the world a good service for once. He refrains, unworthy. 

Once the initial silence has broken, the next one that falls is horrid, so Sydney keeps the conversation going– for her own sake. She shifts, wincing briefly from the ass pain thanks to cheap hospital seats. 

“Uh, what– what do you think Nat’s kid is gonna call you?” 

Carmen was so caught up in the joy of Sydney’s presence that he entirely forgot the reason they were here in the first place. He picks at the dry flesh around a fingernail, growing afraid on his sister’s behalf. She’d called him one night in tears. I don’t know if I can do this, Carmy. Like, I don’t know if I can be a mom.

He didn’t know what to say. When someone is scared, and you don’t know what to say, it’s a good rule of thumb to tell them it’s gonna be alright, you’re gonna be alright, even if you feel like you’re lying. It wasn’t that he didn’t think Sugar wouldn’t be a good mom. There was not a doubt in his mind she’d be a good mom– Hell, she mothered him when Donna failed to. But the fact that he’d turned out how he did made his stomach churn. It wasn’t Nat’s fault, and he feels like a dick that his uncertainty even implied that. It was just… a lot of pressure.  

“Probably just.. Uncle Carmy.” He shrugs, finding solace in the space between Sydney’s eyebrows, which wrinkle when she furrows them in incredulity. Her cheeks dimple to accommodate a correspondent, disbelieving smile.  

“Not even, like, anything fun?” It was so easy to fall into banter with Carmen, even if the right thing to do was be furious at him for how he’d been acting these past few months. She’ll find time to pace in her apartment and scream into her hands about it later. 

Carmen makes a face like he’s being interrogated for a crime he didn’t commit.

“I– I don’t know. Maybe Uncle Bear. Maybe.” 

“Mmh.” Sydney nods and pushes her lips to the side, the digital pattern game she’d occupied herself with now abandoned in her lap. “I don’t even know if I’ll get to be an aunt. I just hope, like, the kid doesn’t say my name wrong, and then I’m stuck as, like.. Bibby for the rest of my life.”

“That’s..” Carmy lets out a soft breath of a chuckle. “I– I mean, okay.”

Syd sits up better and leans toward him briefly, her face almost accused. “What?! Don’t laugh, it’s a genuine concern to have!” 

She can’t help laughing, either. Maybe because it really is silly. Maybe because Carmen is contagious, sticking to her brain like beautiful Tuscan algae to the bottom of a pool. Sydney doesn’t think she ever wants to scrub it off. She’s sick in the head, she ultimately decides. 

Eight A.M. finally rolls around and the Bear's inner circle walk in a cluster down the halls of the maternity ward to Natalie’s room. Tina and Sydney chat quietly, the Faks loudly, both harboring excitement at the new addition to the family. Richie is quiet for once in his fucking life, hasn’t regarded Carmy the entire time he’d been there, aside from brief sidelong glances. He jolts when Richie’s shoulder bumps into his, barely playful. Still mad, but out of love. 

“You nervous, cousin?” He mumbles, perhaps out of respect to new, sleeping mothers. Anyone who knew him could tell he was thinking about the last time he walked down this corridor. 

Carmen shrugs because it’s the safe thing to do, running his fingers across closed lips. His eyes glitter when Sydney rolls her head back in laughter at something stupid Neil had said. “I mean– I dunno. It’s weird, ‘cause it’s like.. Real. Now. I guess.” 

“Yeah, I get that.” Richie nods, unable to restrain himself from tickling Carmen’s face with the “It’s a girl!” teddy he’d bought in the hospital gift shop. Carmy bats it away, muttering “fuck off,” even if he’s smiling. 

He knows the anger won’t go forgotten, and that doesn’t upset him because Richie has a right. But they’re happy for Natalie, and that feeling seems to permeate throughout the entire hospital, full to bursting as his sister says his name and dubs him "Uncle Carmy" like he'd hoped. Doubt completely goes out the window when she asks him if he wants to hold the baby first, fixes his arms to support her head. Sydney briefly peeks over his shoulder, face contorting like she’s hurt by how adorable Baby Bear is. 

“Holy shit,” Carmen mutters, as a newborn fist grasps his finger. Her fingernails are so small, he thinks. Do not fucking drop her, for the love of God, he thinks next. He’s sure his worry is palpable, because Nat takes her back within seconds and sets her in the warmed bassinet beside the hospital bed. 

“She looks like a ham.” Sydney coos endearingly, her grin nearly face-splitting as she curls a finger in front of the baby’s sleeping face. “What color are her eyes?”

“Blue, but I think they’re gonna get darker like Pete’s.” Natalie relays softly, squeezing the hand of her husband. 

The conversation melts in Carmen’s ears, distant and muddled. It’s pleasant, for once. He doesn’t know the last time he’s felt this good, and he finds himself staring at Syd’s profile while she speaks. He doesn’t know if the resentment will return once the little welcoming party ends. He hopes that it doesn’t, not out of worth for Sydney’s care, but a yearning for it. Morning light pours through the room filled with sweet words and laughter, swathing the only important thing in Carmy’s life with rays of sunshine. It pools on her face like honey, and her eyes crinkle when she turns back to meet his gaze. Carmen doesn’t know if it’ll get better. 

All he knows is he needs her.