#very communicative and polite
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------i have had a week , but now that i settled and have had a chance to work with my life , i want to toss a big thank you to lilly over at @floragfx . gorgeous new theme , icon template , post banners and an incredible commissioning experience . lilly was quick , polite , concise and absolutely understood what i was going for - a real treat to work with . please consider commissioning them for graphic needs !
#「 ooc 」 — ❛ hold on٬ cat aggro. ❜#sincerely such a treat to work with#very communicative and polite#and just amazing
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the usual demographic of the book community is being ignorant again so here's a reminder
#i'm sure everyone following me has common sense and media literacy :)))))))))) but#uh i made this in an hour last night the background text is very much off the top of my head#booklr#reading is political#book community#also i have been wanting to do some type stuff more often so this was an excuse for the style choices i guess#btw by the usual i do mean racist primarily white women if i catch people saying it's just all booktok........get over yourself
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Dc x Dp Prompt #22: the Respectful Catcall Guy
Have y’all seen the videos of the respectful catcall guy? The one who says stuff like “Hey girl! You look like you file your taxes in a timely manner!”, “Hey Dawg! Your eyebrows look like they are on point bro!”, or “Yo! You look like you know how to fold a fitted sheet!”. So instead of an unpleasant experience with harassment you get a nice complement? Y’all know those guys?
So that but it’s Danny and Tucker (Sam’s camera women) on their summer road trip to visit colleges. No on is safe from compliments, not civilians, not super heroes/vigilantes, not even rouges are safe.
Some of these interactions would include:
“Damn Dude! You look like you contribute equally to household responsibilities!” (To Barry out with Iris and his kids, he laughs proudly and Iris says “Yeah he does!”)
“ Hey Man! You look like you always pull up for you friends!” (To Wally picking up a drunk Dick Grayson, Donna Troy, and Roy Harper after an undercover Titan’s mission gone wrong. He smiles awkwardly while his friends laugh)
“Dang Bro! You look like you’re taking your meds regularly!” (Trickster/James Jesse tv show version, he says “I am!” not questioning how they would know he takes meds)
“Damn ma’am! You look like you love every dog unconditionally!” (To Wonder Woman after she stopped to pet a dog)
“Dang girl! You look like you could bench press your friends! I bet you give great hugs!” (To Cassie Sandsmark at a Core Four hang out. She proudly shows off her guns and Bart yells back that she does give great hugs)
“Wow Girl! You look like you know how to use healthy communication and boundaries in your relationships!” (To Black Canary, she smirks proudly)
“Damn man! You look like drink your respect women juice at breakfast, lunch AND dinner!” (To a Clark Kent treating Lois to lunch)
“ Wow man! You look like you make an effort to be and active and present part of your daughter’s life! (To Deadshot/Floyd Lawton and his daughter Zoe out for dinner)
“ Dang girl! You look you know how to find joy and whimsy in life!”(To Raven, she smiled and appreciated it, but did double take at the amount of extradimensional death magic on these kids which check with them about later)
“Dang sir! You look like you know how to properly season your cooking!” (To Alfred Pennyworth out on a grocery run)
“Damn miss, you look like you make environmentally conscious lifestyle choices!” (this is actually Sam to Poison Ivy, she follows it up with “I’m a big fan of your work”)
“ Damn boy, you seem like you’re super passionate about what you believe in and deeply care about the people you love!” (To a budding, upstart crime lord Red Hood who is shook by positive feelings at this time in his life. They track him down and explain liminality and help him deal with emotions before he does smth too drastic like decapitating ppl *cough cough* But he still becomes a Crime Lord to mess with his family and still have a dramatic reveal)
#dc x dp#long post#polite catcalling#no one is safe from their positivity#The gang’s on a summer road trip to look at colleges#they did it once and decided to keep it going#They’re definitely going to get some Internet notoriety at some point#Val would have come but she’s decided to go to college closer to home and is looking after Amity while Danny’s gone#The caped community is very amused by them#danny fenton#tucker foley#sam manson#dc heroes and villains#Strega’s dc x dp prompt
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Oh friends this isn't my normal kind of post, but a lot of us are hurting or afraid right now.
There's been plenty of posts that have said it better but dear ones, lean into your community. Cultivate relationships with your neighbors, your local librarians, your churches and charitable organizations that help provide for others.
The hardest thing to do for a lot of us will be to leave the "us vs them" mentality the social media age has helped cultivate and see people as just that. People.
People with good ideas, people with bad ideas, but people who need community and who can change. Not all of us have the time or means to donate or volunteer, believe me I know. But dear ones, take the time to check on others and let yourself be taken care of too.
Communities are stronger together, and we all need that right now regardless of location.
Hold on dear ones, we get through this together.
#current events#us elections#cw us politics#encouragement#we've been isolated and defensive for years on the Internet maybe we try something else#more heart less attack#what's that line from the old Jungle Book? the strength of the wolf is the pack?#we're meant for community and irl is ideal but I very much believe you can have an online community#lavabean thoughts
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I have a CRYSTAL CLEAR vision of postcanon chillaios political marriage fic where dozens of suitors are vying for Laios's slightly sticky hand & he is. oblivious. Which almost causes a major diplomatic incident. Someone (Kabru) tries to delicately explain that he should probably take a spouse already and Laios is like. Oh cool. Chilchuck? Wanna get married? And Chilchuck who had resigned to let the weird Thing he had for his old coworker die quietly has to fucking deal with THIS now.
#Chilchuck is also kind of fucking shocked and Laios is like. Oh I thought u knew?#I was respecting your professional boundaries. But I thought u knew I was obsessed with u for years? ? ? ? Sorry. Am I making it weird.#Anyway kabru says I need a spouse with good diplomatic skills who can guide and instruct me :)#You've been guiding and instructing me for ever! :)#I know you don't feel the same way as me but maybe it could be good for the halfling community? :)#chilaios#Chilchuck the most private man in the worLD dealing with his new relationship being subject to international scrutiny. Do u see my vision.#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Not an arranged marriage but very much a political marriage ugm?#HOW WILL THIS IMPACT THE BURGEONING HALFLING RIGHTS MOVEMENT
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I would urge everyone to take a break from major social media coverage of the election every so often. You owe it to yourself not to doom spiral. Yes, it is bad. But it’s not over for us. Queer people have always endured and we will continue to do so. You still have communities that love you and want you here. Check in with the people who support you in your life, rest, do what makes you happy. It sounds corny, but this isn’t an expression of “just pretend it’s not happening!” I think it’s important not to let them completely demoralize you. You are still wanted here.
#speaking for the queer community because it is a community I can speak for but this does extend to other marginalized communities#I don’t want to take authority over voices I can’t speak for#it’s very overwhelming that this sentiment applies to… most every demographic that isn’t cishet white men#us elections#american politics
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I know I've said "you can't say xyz is or isn't radqueer"
I know that
But that was before I knew Trump supporters were in here so
Trump supporters are not radqueer!
You can be transbigoted! That's fine! I understand that!
You can have a bigoted past! That's okay! Glad you got away from it!
You can have bigoted thoughts sometimes! Everyone has those sometimes! All that matters is what you actually do!
You can rp/draw/write bigoted stuff! Ok it helps a lot with people previously mentioned AND for those who suffered at the hands of bigots
But once you actually take a step into being bigoted
Knowingly, purposely, to hurt others
You stop being radically queer
To be bigoted is to think something is better than others
And what does that get us to?
That a type of body is better, a level of ability is better, a race is better.
And our community is specifically made to tear down those ideas. To let people explore boundaries and constructs made by those who tried to hurt others
Race was made by eugenicists who wanted to proclaim they were the better race, perpetuating racism that can still be felt today! That still harms and kills today.
And so sorry if this is how you find this out, but Trump sees that as a *good* thing! You know! The murder and "scientific" hatred of non-white people?
That's not all of course, but even that small portion is completely antithetical to every single radqueer idea
You cannot be radqueer and be a trump supporter, you cannot be radqueer and be a fascist, you cannot be radqueer and support the systemic, individual, or general harm towards groups of people.
#keep hearing about shitqueers#and im very tired#i did not have the break downs i had over assuming antis were watching me 24/7#online and irl#to then have people so badly fumble the meaning of this community#radqueer 🌈🍓#radq interact#radq safe#pro radq#cw trump#cw politics
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obviously hanguang-jun would wear sports bras…. right?
Wei Wuxian failed his perception and insight check rolls.
#ask#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Flirting works differently when you are Neurodiverse. You need to be told directly or its Not A Thing. (this is a ADHD wwx household)#call that...taking the Initiative....#He is just trying to be polite but also still stuck on a very specific idea of who lwj is.#'He can't be flirting with me - Lan Zhan would combust if he had a single gay thought!'.#combined with: 'I think I might have a little bit of a crush on lwj but it could just be a desire for closer friendship'.#And now we have a recipe for trying to take on the burden of 'protecting someone' from your feelings#when its really just a problem with communication and being afraid of your own feelings + feeling as if you need to handle it alone.#Which we all know is wwx's major flaw. Call that *~*~Character consistency*~*~#Anyways - your art gave me a much needed laugh today B*) thank you very much (also whoops I didn't realize I wasn't following you until now
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Did you see the clip of Joe yesterday?
Is it a clip now? Oh lord....was it funny at least?
It was the first time he ever used the F word in a conference.
He cursed? Y'all lying...I be trying to get him to curse, he don't curse when I'm talking to him...
#again love love loveeee this style of press conference where they get joe to talk about ja'marr a lot the first day#then report everything he said back to ja'marr the next day#truly they do have to communicate with each other in the MOST indirect convoluted ways#exhausting! just make them do these together!!! can you imagine them arguing about whether ja'marr's ever asked for the ball like that??#but still. this version of reality is also Very Good.#is it a clip now?? oh lord... just so wife embarrassed about husband coded if i'm being honest!#like 'oh what did he say now!! i hope it was at least funny!'#and then not believing that joe cursed (just like he didn't believe joe winked earlier in the year)#constantly trying to figure this man out <3#you know he's going to be on joe even more to curse now#the thing is i feel like joe probably doesn't curse much in casual conversion. midwestern polite boy and all that#but he's a grown-ass man so i'm sure he DOES curse occasionally#but maybe knowing how much ja'marr wants him to...he purposefully does it less around him to mess with him#that's a dynamic i fully believe for them#ja'marr chase#joe burrow#joe'marr
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If you haven't heard, the UK has experienced multiple far right islamophobic riots this last week. It's been awful.
And what really rubs salt in the wound is I am seeing multiple people posting about how awful it is that hate has been stirred up against PoC and the Muslim community in the UK as if they themselves haven't been literally posting that Jews lie about antisemitism and stirring up violent hatred against Jews the past nine months.
I don't want this to come across as minimizing the fear Muslims must be feeling at the moment, especially as I know what it's like to be constantly on guard walking around for fear of being attacked however it is absolutely infuriating that the very same people calling out anti-Muslim hatred have been stoking the fire of anti-jewish racism under the guise of justice. Their hypocrisy is back on show once again
#jumblr#antisemitism#uk politics#the jewish community is standing in solidarity with the muslim community in the uk#im glad my synagoge has a very good interfaith relationship with the local mosques#this country is getting more and more extreme (both left and right) and both sides are trying to leave permanent scars#they pretend they care about the UK but both the far left and the far right are desperately trying to drag us down#i hope the government can get these riots quelled before more people are hurt
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[Immediately after Fit brutally roasted a chatter for being a filthy metagamer]
Dono: You became my comfort streamer. It has been great here.
Fit: Oh, thank you so much, thank you thank you thank you. I'm glad I can bring you comfort when I insult the sht out of some chatters, I'm glad I can comfort you. That's right!
Fit: People say I'm nice, no, I'm not nice. I'm polite. Mostly. There's a difference between being nice and being polite, I am polite. I am polite.
#FitMC#QSMP#Fit#February 11 2024#Top 10 FitMC moments tbh#I have been extremely annoyed / easily frustrated by large parts of the community as a whole lately#(not streamer specific and no specific thing really just all chats & fans being varying degrees of insufferable / annoying and it piling up#to the point where I've considered taking a step away from the series#But Fit's been nice to watch because he doesn't let dumb stuff slide lmao#maybe I'm just getting too old for this#still love the series I just don't want to interact with the chat or fandom much anymore#anyways Fit's voice saying the ''I'm not nice I'm polite. Mostly'' line is very good
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Sasha using the title "Lord" in RiAAU after taking over Toad Tower and presumably killing Grime and stealing Barrel's Warhammer from him, and other political and military leaders assuming she's a man because, well, Sasha is a gender neutral name, so they hear Lord Sasha and assume they're talking about an adult male toad warrior. The second most powerful person in the known world and only real threat to the Leviathan reign!
Cue princess Marcy fleeing Newtopia and her father seeking refuge with his worst enemy hoping to offer information and political levarage in exchange for protection, perhaps even offering herself in marriage to transfer eventual inheritances and whatnot, and she finds out that Lord Sasha is not, indeed, a dark and domineering toad warlord, but a beautiful, terrifying girl her age that looks like her and oh god her poor little lesbian heart can barely take it.
#amphibia#sasharcy#marcy wu#sasha waybright#my posts#raised in amphibia au#sasha and marcy are over here living in game of thrones while#anne is playing stardew valley with a mod that gives you ptds#Sasha being mistaken(? as a man being a common misunderstanding due to poor communication to the point potential allies don't believe her#unless she's carrying the hammer around herself#lord sasha with her two wives... nnhnhnn... one representing her alliance with the frogs of frog valley and possibly beyond depending on ho#she and her grandfather (current mayor of wartwood) play their cards#and the other in her sansa stark era (horrible violations of bodily autonomy involved) (not by sasha btw) trying to maintain alliances#with noble newt houses after betraying her father and eloping with the enemy#after learning The Truth^TM (which she's conveniently hiding from everyone else except maybe olivia and that's a big maybe)#cue some nice toad civil wars (the eastern and northern tower may support sasha but despite their less than friendly relationship#beatrix will NOT recognize this magical alien's victory over her dead brother. and my friend beatrix is not to be messed with)#anne having lots of self worth issues after her very morally questionable grandfather married her off to sasha for political reasons#marcy having. uh. green blood. and a weird metalic port in the back of her neck. her brain feels tingly when she touches it#and king andrias desperately fighting to crush this little frog valley rebellion and punish those to blame for the abduction of his daughte#edit: i meant ptsd. anne has ptsd from that time she may or may not have accidentally indirectly caused the death of sprig and polly's#parents at age 8 (they were her parents for 4 years. the only parents she remembers. she hasn't forgiven herself and deep down#neither has hop pop but we don't talk about it)
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how is sex work perceived and treated - spiritually, legally, morally - in broad areas relevant to the white calf core cast? imperial wardi, the hills etc
Sex work is EXTREMELY stigmatized in Imperial Wardin, yet generally regarded as an element of society and a necessary function, not one to be eliminated. You'll occasionally find fringe groups decrying the presence of brothels as polluting elements upon cities, but they are minority figures- sex work is legal, generally accepted, and very common.
There are some exceptions- in most of the city-states, only sex work out of registered brothels is considered fully legal (independent sex workers are breaking the law in most city-states, though how much these laws are enforced varies heavily). All legally operating brothels must be officially registered, and are heavily taxed.
Prostitution of children is illegal, and this is one of VERY few protections for sex workers that is strongly enforced. But it should be clear that the societal definition of a child here does not match the contemporary- a person is generally considered an adult woman upon menarche (which is later on average due to poorer nutrition, but is still going to include a lot of like, 14 year olds). Boys are considered adults at the age of 16.
Forced prostitution is also illegal on paper, but this is poorly enforced. Even when not Outright forced, many sex workers are working as indentured laborers, or under prohibitive conditions where they have very little freedom of movement or legal ability to leave during the duration of their contracts.
Sex workers are an incredibly vulnerable, stigmatized social minority that have very few protections and are often subject to abuse.
The stigma against sex work surrounds the sex workers themselves. This is culturally justified and partly rooted in aspects of broader body taboo- receiving penetration = metaphysical vulnerability = openness to spiritual pollution, and they are considered to be heavily polluted by their line of work (regardless of whether or not a given person actually is receiving penetration on a regular basis- male sex workers who primarily have women as clients receive much the same treatment, the stigma here is fundamentally a form of bigotry, not something with a consistent internal logic).
In addition to concerns around penetration, the act of '''selling''' the body itself is seen as a polluting devaluation of the sacred body and using it to extreme excess. Sexuality and libido is societally valued, but in a framework of moderation- sex workers are seen as wildly out of moderation and are often ascribed qualities of an excessive libido by virtue of their line of work.
Sex workers are prohibited from entering most temples and participating in many public rites, justified in their ‘polluted’ status, under the assumption that it will de-purify the place and sully most rites. This serves to keep them isolated from key facets of social life and culture, and can leave many spiritually ostracized (most sex workers from within this cultural sphere are also going to believe in notions that they are spiritually polluted, with limited outlets to cleanse themselves).
There is one folk tradition that has developed to assuage some of these fears and the sense of isolation- an epithet to the Face Ganmache that translates literally to 'Mother of Whores' (a rather strong name that reclaims degrading slang in the original language as well), which watches over sex workers and their labors. This is wholly a folk tradition and not part of core dogma, and priests are self-appointed, mostly elderly former sex workers. They provide rites of purification and blessings for those denied access to temples, sometimes train themselves as midwives to assist in births (or abortions), and will help ensure deceased workers get proper funeral rites.
Generally, the concept of something being spiritually polluted translates to full avoidance of the person/place/thing involved, but these concerns are rarely applied to the Hiring of sex workers (ie they are spiritually polluted and highly impure and shouldn't enter temples but you, the client, are not affected by contact). While some people will try to provide logical explanations for why hiring a sex worker is not polluting, this does not have any true underlying logic and is a product of a society that both reviles sex workers and desires their labor.
They are generally expected to visually identify themselves as sex workers at all times- the exact details vary by city-state, but wearing hair unbraided and an uncovered head in public is most common (particularly in the west of the region).
Male sex workers are denied certain rights otherwise available by default to men (self-legal representation, ability to own land that is not gifted, etc). Female sex workers do not have these rights to begin with, and have even more difficulty than other women in finding legal representation, given that they situationally rarely have fathers/husbands/male family members willing to support them.
Because of their inability to represent themselves in court and the difficulty in finding representation, they often have little to no recourse against abuse or violations of their contracts. There are some lawyers who specialize in representing sex workers (fewer still who do this entirely out of benevolence for a vulnerable social class), but they are few and far between.
The majority of sex work is marketed towards male clients, and the majority of sex workers are women. Male sex workers are mostly young men who serve male clients, and will usually keep themselves beardless and not overtly masculine (while not distinctly effeminate either) to remain desirable targets for the sexual outlet of most men. (There is no concept of sexuality in this culture- if you are a man, you are a penetrative partner in sex and the gender of the receiving partner is of little concern. Younger men beneath you in social stature (in practice, these are almost always sex workers) are considered appropriate targets of male desire, and as such you have some men who would be considered heterosexual by contemporary standards having sex with other men). Male workers who primarily serve female clients tend to vary more in age and have less social restrictions on their appearance or masculine presentation.
Eunuch sex workers usually serve male clients, and are regarded as appropriate targets of male attraction regardless of their age (largely as they are seen as entirely incapable of performing penetrative roles, and conceptualized as de-gendered). Akoshos (those designated male who perform women's gender roles) sex workers are seen as uniquely predisposed to serve both male and female clients, as their gendered space is broadly conceptualized as dual-gendered (being physically capable of performing 'male' penetrative roles while living under women's social roles)
Hiring of sex workers is not considered infidelity and is entirely permissible to do while married, though women are often heavily discouraged from doing so (largely out of concerns of pregnancy, partly out of patriarchal control over women's sexual behavior). A woman who pays for sex work receives more scrutiny than is applied to men. It is not outright inappropriate, but can be considered indicative of an excessive libido or overmasculinization. Women are imagined as having naturally lower libidos than men, so behaviors that challenge this notion tend to be be noted.
The only circumstances in which hiring sex workers as a man attracts scrutiny is when it is deemed excessive, symptomatic of an uncontrolled libido. Men who hire male sex workers closer to their age and/or bearded will also attract scrutiny- while not outright Condemned, it's suspiciously out of the acceptable range for male desire (though will most often similarly be interpreted as an excessive, uncontrolled libido, ie you'll just fuck anything with a hole). Receiving penetration from a sex worker as a man is wholly condemned, as is seen as UNIQUELY violating, not only a severe deviance from male social roles, but at the hands of a stigmatized, polluted figure that is at the absolute bottom of the social ladder. This usually happens in secret and often involves paying the worker off for their silence.
The one major exception to stigma against sex workers is in the lemna courtesan tradition. Lemna are mostly unmarried women and/or akoshos who are very skilled trained performers who work as entertainers for wealthy clients. Their services are not sexual in nature, rather they sing, dance, act, play music, and recite poetry, and are skilled conversationalists that provide company for clients. Lemna usually operate out of elite brothels, but as separate services to the sex workers, and are in theory never available for sex work. Lemna providing sex work sometimes (though not frequently) occurs in practice, but it is always be presented as something they have not been Paid to do- their payment was for entertainment, and they will present it as a (almost always purely fantastical) situation that they have grown attracted to their client and are engaging in a romantic tryst.
Lemna courtesanship is long-established and a valued part of this culture's art and theater traditions, and they do not face the same stigma as sex workers, rather being seen as an elite class of performers. They do not exactly have a High place in society either (as unmarried civilian women and/or akoshos, they are notably lacking in social power), but the regard towards them is overall positive. The exemption to this stigma partially lies within the framework of body taboo (they do not explicitly 'sell' their bodies or directly engage in sex work), but is largely rooted in the esteem of their tradition rather than any coherent logic.
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Sex work has a much less significant, less complicated, and less intensely stigmatized place in the highlands, mostly due to its reduced presence. Most people are living in relatively small agricultural villages, or transiently as herders, so there are fewer opportunities for sex workers to operate on regular and official levels. The only places you can reliably find sex workers within the highlands are in small quasi-towns that crop up around land trade routes, or occasionally as traveling traders (usually offering material goods in addition to sex work services).
There’s also no intra-highlands currency system, so sex workers will usually be paid in goods, which in turn influences the cultural lens on sex work. Goods have direct, immediate utilitarian value that currency does not, and paying goods for service is most pragmatically done as a means of material practicality- forming alliances, acquiring farmhands, receiving the defensive or offensive service of warriors, etc, not for temporary gratification.
The fact that this cultural sphere is fairly egalitarian in terms of gender (though it has strongly enforced, separate gender roles for married men and women) also contributes to the comparative lack of stigma- part of the Imperial Wardi stigma against sex work is interwoven with misogyny (with women sex workers being the most degraded extent of femininity, and male sex workers taking on inappropriate, degraded feminine roles in providing sexual services). Women have equal overall societal power to men in the Hill Tribes cultural sphere, and things associated with femininity are not Themselves degrading (men seen as feminine are not shamed for femininity itself, rather in their specific failure to perform male gender roles- the distinction can be subtle but is very significant to how gender roles are approached).
Casual sex between unmarried men and women is fully accepted, somewhat seen as a hallmark of youth. However, married couples are expected to remain exclusively faithful to one another. This also goes a ways to discourage hiring of sex workers, which would be accepted grounds for a divorce and a mark of shame on the person who strayed.
While not excessively stigmatized, the views on sex work here is nowhere near Enlightened And Supportive either, it’s still seen as a highly degrading, unfortunate line of work. Sex workers are usually going to be unmarried women of marriageable age who could not (or would not) acquire a husband for one reason or another. They are women who failed in expected roles of marriage and becoming the manager of a family’s home and property, and have not even taken an esteemed, productive role for spinsters (usually physical labor in herding, farming, raiding) in favor of one that is considered ‘selling’ one’s body to provide useless, base services to desperate men. It's something that will usually be looked at as sad and unfortunate at best, or an absurd dereliction of duty at worst.
Male sex workers are virtually unheard of (within the highlands at least, there's cultural stereotypes of Wardi men being effeminate and predisposed to sex with men, so of course THEY'VE got male sex workers all over the fucking place), and the concept of a man operating as a sex worker would just seem absurd to most.
But the levels of social shame surrounding sex work are actually higher for the client in this cultural context- it’s suggestive that you either cannot afford to get a wife/do not have the requisite masculine skillset to be a husband, or otherwise that you’re so utterly incapable of getting laid that you have to go to great effort and barter for sex, a petty expense of valuable goods. It's both a foolish waste and in many ways a failure of expected male gender roles. Most men who hire the services of sex workers will keep it on the down low, or (if living near the borders) commute to Wardi towns or tradeways for access. It’s seen as an act of desperation, foolish, emasculating, and will generally be mocked and shamed.
I actually have a framework of a folktale that kind of demonstrates the cultural lens pre-established (no names for the characters or clans involved, it's supposed to be of the far northern Bict-Braíghnnas tribe). I'll put it under the cut:
One of the folktales describes a young woman who was strikingly beautiful and exceedingly clever. She was of the Bict-Braíghnnas, the lone daughter of a very small, very poor clan, consisting only of her immediate family and a few cousins. Her father had died young, and her younger brothers and cousins were malnourished and inexperienced, and could do little to protect or grow their meager herd of horses (they certainly could not afford cattle). She had to take on the role of the provider for herself and remained unmarried long past marriageable age, living day by day doing whatever she could to scrape by and keep her family afloat.
She became aware that the patriarch of her ruling clan had an eye for her, and he began approaching her in hopes of soliciting sex. At first, she always brushed him off. She found him repulsive, as he was foolish and greedy and rather ugly. But she started to see an opportunity in all this. It was a humiliating opportunity, but one she was willing to take.
The next time he approached, she pretended to consider his advances, but only if he should provide payment in turn- if she was as beautiful as he kept saying, and he was as wealthy as he kept bragging, wouldn't it be worth the price? He first offered her a sack of barley, but she laughed him off. He then offered her fine clothes, but she feigned insult, was she not already beautiful even in poor, worn rags? He then offered her a breeding pair of pheasants, and she pushed aside her shawl to expose her breasts, and sweetly asked if he Really could not do better, wealthy in cattle as he was. The man was now, quite clearly, hard in his trousers.
He finally relented to an obscene payment- he would go under his wife (the owner of his cattle)'s nose and give her an adult cow, in payment for having sex with him just once. This is a high price to pay, but she was gorgeous and he was rich in cattle and could afford to lose one (or two. or five. Maybe more.). She accepted his offer and had sex with him, and came away with her very first cow.
(Some tellings of this story go on a tangent here where she sneaks the cow right back into the man's fields under cover of darkness, to breed it with one of his bulls and begin forming her own herd)
Over the next several months, he started regularly approaching her for sex in exchange for cattle, until he had to start coming up with explanations to his wife as to where the missing cattle had gone- he first claimed they were given as gifts, then that some were stolen, inventing wild stories of great raids and declaring open conflict with the greatest rival to his clan, all as means of masking his dalliances. This skirmishing came at great cost to his own clan, but he was too foolish and weak-willed to stop.
The woman was meanwhile using her newfound and growing wealth in cattle to make connections and political moves, slowly establishing herself as a powerful figure and having many in her debt. Her brothers and cousins, finally well fed, grew tall and healthy and began to take on roles as herders, protectors, and raiders, with the assistance of more young men gained in alliance. All the while, she dutifully continued her paid trysts with the patriarch whenever he summoned her.
Eventually, the man had given her so many cattle (which had been bred in the meantime, and more had been acquired in trade and raids) that she had three times as many as he did. One day, she did not appear as expected. She had amassed great wealth for herself and her clan, and had been courting the unwed son of the patriarch’s rival clan. The son paid a hefty bride price for her, and they were wed on that day.
Now the wealthiest in cattle and the most powerful clan in the valley, the woman and her new husband ousted the weakened and disgraced former patriarch, becoming the new ruling clan of the Bict-Braíghnnas. The couple were wise and wealthy rulers, and their clan remains in power and rich in cattle to this day.
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The cultural outlook on sex work (among other things) is fairly well encapsulated here- the sex work itself is degrading, but this fits into common motifs of this cultural sphere’s folktales where the hero figure overcomes difficult and often degrading situations with wit and social skill, and ultimately rises above it. Note that as a (non-comedic) hero of this tale, she uses her sex work very intentionally and pragmatically for material gain and alongside many other measures to increase her standing. Also note that, when unmarried, she's specified as taking up practical labor roles, and ultimately acquires a husband and ends the story in the expected position as a wife.
The actions of the man who hired her are distinctly shameful. He is performing his role as a husband TERRIBLY- being unfaithful, completely mismanaging his wife’s herds and ultimately driving his clan out of power all in pursuit of petty lust. He is in part an exaggerated, cartoonish embodiment of the cultural perception of the clients of sex workers- desperate, foolishly lustful, and an overall failure as a man. Most hearing this story would find his role highly comedic, a powerful but stupid foe for the clever and pragmatic hero to overcome.
(Very minor side note: the detail of him being enthralled by her breasts is also meant to be comedic- breasts are not sexualized in this culture (women's hips/thighs/buttocks are what is typically seen as sexually attractive), and many women will be out topless on hot days without note being made of it (toplessness is culturally acceptable, exposing genitalia/buttocks is not). The notion of a man being out of his mind horny over the sight of a bare tit would register to listeners as excessively lustful in a humorous capacity)
While the focus of the story is ultimately more on the contrast of thrifty and foolish behaviors, it also functions as a discouragement of hiring sex workers, casting the loss of assets in trade for sex as a similarly foolish venture, degrading to the worker and humiliating to the client.
#VERY long post. Enjoy#The only main characters who have hired sex workers are Janeys and Brakul#Janeys exclusively goes for 'appropriate' targets (mostly being women or young beardless men). Which he is not actually attracted to.#And is a fucking terrible rude as shit client with his only redeeming quality being that he pays VERY well (largely with the#implication of keeping quiet about whatever he inevitably did to embarrass himself)#Brakul only does it occasionally and on the downlow and goes for people he actually IS attracted to (men closer to his age- which#generally will be workers who normally serve female clients). He is VERY ashamed that he does it to begin with but is at least#polite and businesslike about it. He fucks off the second its over. Sometimes he's like 'actually never mind' and pays and leaves#midway through. Literally just pulls out and sets down some money and dips. They'll never see him again.#Palo has never hired a sex worker but has kind of a unique relationship with the community. Growing up in a mercantile family#in a district with a lot of brothels- sex workers were kind of just part of the community. He still ascribes to most cultural beliefs#surrounding sex work and isn't like Enlightened about it but is much more inclined to treat sex workers like peers and with a degree#of respect normally afforded to any stranger.#One of the akoshos in his community (that he spent his childhood fascinated with) was a priestess to the Mother of Whores and a#genuinely kind (though VERY stern) old woman. Had a very cold hard gaze and rugged look and he was kind of scared of her#but one time when he was 12 he got bitten by a street dog and she gave him a blessing then and there so he wouldn't have to walk#all the way to a temple. Their blessings are not considered legit under standard practice (given they are not considered a legitimate#priesthood) but he felt a lot better afterwords.
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'I flirted with the idea that instead of being trans that I was just a cross-dresser (a quirk, I thought, that could be quietly folded into an otherwise average life) and that my dysphoria was sexual in nature, and sexual only. And if my feelings were only sexual, then, I wondered, perhaps I wasn’t actually trans.
I had read about a book called The Man Who Would Be Queen, by a Northwestern University professor who believed that transwomen who were attracted to women were really confused fetishists, they wanted to be women to satisfy an autogynephilia. And though I first read about this book in the context of its debunkment and disparagement, I thought about the electricity of slipping on those tights, zipping up those boots, and a stream of guilt followed. Maybe this professor was right, and maybe I was only a fetishist. Not trans, just a misguided boy.
About a year later, on the Internet, I come across a transwoman who added a unique message to the crowd refuting this professor. Oh, I wish I remember who this woman was, and I wish even more that I could do better than paraphrase her, but I remember her saying something like this: “Well, of course I feel sexy putting on women’s clothing and having a woman’s body. If you feel comfortable in your body for the first time, won’t that probably mean it’ll be the first time you feel comfortable, too, with delighting in your body as a sexual thing?”'
-Casey Plett, Consciousness
#this quote always moves me almost to tears when i remember it#i'm not a trans woman and i don't share the author's specific experiences with transition#but it really moves me that she frame transition as joyfully giving yourself permission to approach your body#not as something that has to be disciplined and deprived and made small in all these various ways#but as a means for experiencing pleasure and joy and delight and for insisting that our feelings and desires are worth#valuing and exploring and treasuring#i always used to think of prioritizing those things for myself as selfish and irresponsible#but who does it harm to want to experience pleasure in your own body?#it's such a beautifully simple and powerful switch to have flip in your head#and equally why are we forced to deny our own pleasure in transition and anything else related to our bodies in the name of moral rectitude#this is why i get so confused and pissed off when other trans people are fatphobic for example#like why are you so invested in politics of shame and disgust that never had any purpose other than#violently disciplining people as if they've violated moral codes by existing in a body#to say nothing of white people being racist in gay and trans communities#like again this system of violence is foundational to homophobia and transphobia#so why are you acting like it has nothing to do with you#even if you are unmoved by the urgency of other people's suffering which btw you should be moved by#what do you hope to gain by acting a collaborator and handmaiden to those systems#Casey Plett#she really is one of my favorite authors i wish more non-canadians read her#this quote is from a series of columns she did ont transition and every single one is a banger#i love when she talks about the people-pleasing elements of dysphoria and transition denial#she's so sharp about noting how many of us deny our own dysphoria on the grounds that others like and validate our bodies#that's how i always felt during my cis conventionally feminine era#it pleased other people so much and also that reception felt so hollow and joyless to me because i hated it#i get less of that positive feedback but that feels so unimportant next to the joy and pleasure i get to experience#said with the understanding that i'm very privileged in being able to prioritize those things without fear. but it was a switch flip#personal nonsense
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I never stopped wondering why natori thought that gifting a happily-married woman a bouquet of roses in exchange of borrowing her adopted son for a weekend trip was the correct course of action 😭
#he's probably just rizz-maxxing in an attempt to swoon touko and get her to say yes without interrogating who he is and how he knew her son#but rewatching this episode still has me ?!?!? because YOU COULD'VE BEEN WHACKED BY HER HUSBAND IF HE WASN'T SUCH A KIND MAN PLEASEEEE 😭#i think natori understands societal norms very well (in both regular humans and exorcists' community). he can't survive this far without it#but this whole scene is likely because he doesn't have any friends. so he doesn't know how to interact with a friend's family haha 💔#like nooo natori... just bring your body + introduce yourself and your intentions politely... the fujiwaras would gladly let you borrow him#on surface-level he probably does it because of the rizz-maxxing attempt. but if you look a little deeper into it... (collapses) 🥲💔#natori shuuichi#natsume takashi#fujiwara touko#natsume yuujinchou#natsume's book of friends#natsuyuu#this is nawttt to be taken as a ship post btw 💀💀💀
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I had the MOST stressful experience last night realizing I accidentally missed the due date for my final project in a ZERO LATE CREDIT NO EXCEPTIONS class, then spent the next several hours in frantic combat with my printer (shout-out to my sister the MVP who woke up at 3am and helped me wrangle) and then I turned In my last assignment at 7am after the midnight deadline and sent a very polite email to my professor
Who had mercy on me!!!! and said she'd accept it with points deducted, and then when she was grading was like 'i can see the work you put into this' and gave me full credit. Not only did I not fail the class required to move on in my degree, I actually got a good grade!
Score one for polite emails and communication!!!!!
When people are like 'just communicate with your teachers' they mean it and I'm so fucking relieved it worked out
#i knew this in theory but it was absolutely fucking nerve wracking in practice#she also said in my course assessment that I communicated very professionally bless her#the thing is that the no late credit thing is all 'theres no such thing as late credit in an actual job!!!'#but actually in an actual job you can politely communicate with people and mostly work things out#so im glad it carried through here#the real problem is not letting people know what is happening etc etc#lori chat#anyways im still reeling and very grateful things worked out
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