#vent post...sorta

[ad-astra-per-aspera-1389]

me: ugh everything is so much why do i bother anymore? i just want to sleep for the next two weeks and never talk to anyone again

my tumblr notifs: "green-again liked your post"

me: okay yeah maybe the world isn't so bad after all

[thecommunalfoolboy]

It’s crazy how many people just don’t understand why a lot of aro and or ace people don’t like that Alaster gets shipped. It’s not that hard to understand we don’t have a lot to let ourselves lose. I mean can you name 10 asexual characters? 5? Can you name two aro characters. There’s the guy from Archie who they made have a sex scene in a movie version. There’s a few books. I think a background character in Heartstopper? Do you see the theme here??? You’re all queer people, do you not get it? How it feels to have nothing? Is it so wrong to be upset that there’s finally an outwardly aroace person in popular media and instead of people embracing that they’re fighting on the internet about why it’s ok to ignore it? And I will never in my fucking life have anything against the people who are aro and or ace and portray him in THEIR experiences, even if it is a romance or sex favorable experience, but it is obvious that way too many of you guys are allo and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t even like him as a character that much, he isn’t even made by an aroace artist. The show isn’t even that fucking good, I just want to keep someone like me for once in my life. If there were a million other aroace characters I wouldn’t care, but it just hurts seeing erasure coming from my own community. It just sucks, man, I don’t know. It just sucks

[cherry-pop-elf]

Night terrors

Anya x Reader

Can be read as platonic because we all want to take care of her like we wish someone would for us

AN: As a victim of sexual assault I feel it is important to have a realistic fluff story about the aftermath of it. How it affects the person after it’s been done and how the trauma lingers. How it’s so very important for the person to have a support network. YOU will be her support network. Thank you

Also not to get political but god women in the USA are experiencing a massive increase of assaults so call this projection, or call this training for the inevitable

SUM: Despite surviving that Tulpar adventure, despite all the good karma thrown back at you all, there are just too many many scars to truly recover from

Warnings: Past sexual assault, nightmares, PTSD, whump, abortion, paranoia, it’s gonna be a stressful read, there will be fluff don’t worry, paranoia, inspired/based on my own experiences

“STOP-!”

Anya was screaming in her sleep again.

Woke you up pretty quickly, as you were sharing a bed with her. She was rather scared to sleep alone. Afraid that someone will just break in and take advantage of her. That somehow Jimmy, who long since was dead, will break in again.

“Anya-! Anya wake up! It’s me! Anya-!” You would shake her and try to get her to wake up. To get her out of that terrifying cloud of memories. Her poor face was pale and full of sweat, and she was scared awake by you shaking her. For a fleeting moment she thought it was Jimmy.

As she gave another cry, you reached over and turned on the bedside tables lamp.

She saw your face, and finally took a breathe.

You two weren’t on the Tulpar anymore. Jimmy wasn’t going to hurt either of you ever again. Swansea was home with his wife. Daisuke was home with his mother and father. And she was here with you.

She was alive.

“I….Im sorry-“ Anya sniffled, as you just pulled her into your arms. Gentle with combing your fingers through her hair. Just gentle reminders to not be sorry. To not be sorry for being justified with her fear.

“He won’t ever get you again. I promise.” You would remind her, but she would still tremble.

“Can we check the locks again?” She would ask you, and you would nod. Often times this was the case. No matter how many times she would ask you that question you never got annoyed. It’s good to check the locks anyway. Gotta stay safe after all.

You would both climb out of bed, put on your robes, and go walking around the home. One of your hands was left to be held by Anya’s, as the other would be used to check the locks on everything. From the multiple at front door, from each window, to that of the back door. Each one checked, as Anya would hug at you close.

Was a very nice home, you had to admit. After having rescue finally called, and being saved, the media went nuts. Especially on the fact Curly was still alive. Gave Anya the much needed support to show she was very worthy of a position as a proper doctor. That also meant she got herself quite the hefty salary. Also helps that she now had partial royalties to the book she helped write about the adventure on the ship.

“Every lock is secure.” You explained, as she gave still an anxious look.

“Let’s check each room, and closet. Yeah?” That made her quickly nod.

Now you two were roaming the entire house now. Checking under furniture, in closets, all the nine yards. No stone was left un-turned. You would do it a million times for her. She deserved to have some kind of relief from it all.

“There we go. No Jimmy.” You would give her a hug, and she hugged you back. Still shaken, but at least she was breathing more steady.

The two of you would return to the bedroom, where she did her routine. Checking under her pillow for her sheathed knife, the bedside for her baseball bat, the drawer for her gun, and to take an extra pill to help with the anxiety burst she was having. Her routine.

She would try and lay down, only to dart her head towards the bedroom door. Eyes wide with raw and pure fear.

“I swear I heard him at the door. I swear I did. He said my name he said my name-“ She whimpered, as you would get up. You opened the door, looked around the hallway, and returned.

“Don’t worry Anya. I didn’t hear a single thing.” You reassured, as you would lock the bedroom door for her. Along with putting a chair under the door handle. Even went as far as to double check the bedroom windows, and closed the curtains.

“I’m so sorry-“ She would begin again, as her eyes watered. She felt like such a burden. To have all this fear and paranoia. To the point she couldn’t feel safe when left alone. You couldn’t blame her though. The wounds were still so horribly fresh. Not to mention sometimes PTSD can kick in so many years later. You’ll take the morbid comfort in having it kick in now where you all can handle it now and prepare for the future than suddenly out of nowhere in God knows how long.

It is what it is.

She wasn’t the only one traumatized after all, and she shouldn’t need to apologize for justified fear.

You would pull her back into your arms, and you both laid down. You would turn on the white noise machine for her, to help block the paranoid sounds of voices and scratches from the doors, and would just talk with her. Talk until her medication kicked in to help her sleep.

Didn’t matter what it was. It was just noise to keep her mind distracted.

You wondered how the rest of the crew was doing. How they were dealing with it.

They all had family, so maybe they were doing well. Really should meet up again soon. Can’t be blamed life is so busy.

Curly was back living with his parents and siblings, which they welcomed with open arms. Even his friends before the crew were willing to all share a space to help.

Swansea had his wife and even his kids. Sure he says he’s too old to be traumatized but he keeps checking on his kids way more often now. That’s for sure.

God knows when poor Daisuke’s PTSD will kick in. He may be acting fine now but it’s gonna be a ticking time bomb. It’ll come at him sooner or later. For now his parents were feeling like monsters for pressuring him into that intern ship. He never blamed them, of course. He is even still working under a mentorship with Swansea even. Guess not everything was negative.

Then there was you and Anya. She was the most traumatized of all. There was even the trauma of an abortion. There’s still so many emotions with that as well, but you held her hand through it. Even as far as to move in with her to help. You two had always been very close. Even before joining the crew. You two were always tagged together. Even nicked named her assistant to a point.

You’ll stick with her through the ends of the earth.

“Wanna go visit Curly in the morning? It’ll be Saturday. Maybe we can even invite Swansea and Daisuke.” You offered. Just something positive to look forward to. Something worth waiting for.

“That would be nice.” She muttered, as her own paranoias exhaustion was kicking in. Too tired to even be afraid. Often times how it ends. She gets herself so worked up it ends up being the very same thing that makes her fall back asleep.

“Yeah. We can check out his new prosthetics. Daisuke said he even bought stickers specifically for them.” That had Anya smile. That sweet smile that was hard to come by right now. One that was filled with comfort. Comfort of such an innocent and sweet thought.

“Swansea says he’s also going to attach his own upgrades to it. Not sure how that will work, or what the hell he’s planning, but not gonna lie I need to see if he gives him rocket boosters.”

That got a little laugh from her. The both of you imagining poor Captain Curly flying around in the sky, as Daisuke runs around with some trampoline to try and catch him on.

Just something silly to cut through it all.

Seemed to work, as you could feel her breathing easier now. Her breath not so intense. Was far more steady, and you could tell she fell back asleep. You were thankful for it. Not because she was annoying you. No. Never. But because she needed her rest. She deserves it. She already is working long hours at the hospital, which you bet is because she is trying to avoid being isolated and alone at all cost maybe even reduce sleeping to, so she needed proper sleep more than ever.

And you’ll do your best for her. To help her with it all. You were her little assistant. You’ll do what an assistant does best. Make sure your boss is able to tackle projects easier.

And this project was healing. A project that won’t ever end, will have ups and downs, and be taxing. Over time out the ass and no vacations.

And you know what you say to that?

Bring it.

Thank you so much for reading. This was a more vulnerable piece because Anya really reminded me so much of myself. How I’m suppose to take care of everyone else, while my traumatic abuse is just swept under the rug.

Since you read all the way to the end, maybe take a look at this

National Sexual Assault Hotline:

1-800-656-4673

National Domestic Violence Hotline:

800-799-7233

RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network)

1-800-656-4673

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

You deserve love and support. What happened wasn’t your fault in the slightest. Not even for a single second. You deserve happiness, hope, and to live a long and healthy life. Everything will be ok again. Doesn’t seem like it now, but it will. I promise

[hoofpeet]

Depersonalization + Family

[ohnomysoul]

I think we should have a conversation about how people tend to portray Hornet as having a hair-trigger temper/being always just angry and how that’s both a disservice to her character and really odd considering how much of a stoic she tends to be in game about her feelings. She’s blunt and sharp but not explosive and straight up abrasive. She has tact. Just like someone who’s both a spider and born into a royal family has to be to survive.

And along with that, as a Lesbian myself, the way people write her as being always angry and pissed off mixed with the other defining trait of being a lesbian or sapphic in some way also rubs me the wrong way.

Like… I hope people realize that they are making her into the “angry/bitchy lesbian trope” right??? And by making her like be especially rude towards the men (who are written to hit on her) also plays into that? I doubt it’s intentional but it’s still offensive.

(Clarification too just in case: I love when people headcanon Hornet as being a Lesbian for obvious reasons that are not limited to me simply loving her as a character, but I do beg people to think more about how making the self controlled guardian that Hornet is into a lesbophobic trope that isn’t even adhering to her canon character is disheartening.)

[fuzzyoctoplushie]

Me: *shows one of my new drawings that I’m very proud of to an active discord server w some of my friends*

(No replies or any acknowledgment of me at all)

Someone random: *sends their (also very good) pieces of art after mine*

(Like five people immediately start complimenting them and replying to them, completely ignoring my piece)

I love being ignored by people who I’m not even sure are my friends anymore, don’t you?

[xx-female]

not a day goes by without me wishing i could save my mother. all the other women in my family, too, but especially my mother.

[therandomdragons]

to be clear. I know hazbin hotel/helluva boss aren't perfect. nor is their creator. but im doing my best not to let the discourse around them/her discourage me from enjoying art that I find enjoyment in. im tired of feeling guilty bc something I enjoy isn't squeaky clean 100% perfect all the time. shit's just not like that. and I understand there's nuance here, but fuck man. life's hard enough already. im gonna do my best to ignore the void of nonsense and enjoy the demon shows.

all that to say im tired of feeling like I'M a bad person for liking "bad" things and I wish there was a way to make it stop lol

[spectatingspectacle]

Random MHE lore drop!

Valentine was the reason Leshy unintentionally quit smoking (or at the very least only smoking once in a blue moon) it's a lot more common to see him with a lollipop rather than a cigarette after the lamb gets adopted into the family!

[dorkynerd23]

The Nuzi Hate Is Ridiculous And Just Saddening/Defending Nuzi.

Alright, so...let me just start off saying that this'll be the last time I'm going to discuss anything drama related, especially what goes on in the Murder Drones Community. Honestly, at least over here on Tumblr, the fandom isn't that bad and awful and is not that much of a trainwreck as it is over on the toxic bird site, but this is something that just NEEDS to be discussed in general. This situation and just the insane amount of drama and fighting that's been happening with the MD fandom lately has honestly been tiring and has taken a toll on me. it honestly has, if I'm gonna be honest, it's been draining and I just don't wanna talk and deal with this anymore. I just wanna move on from this situation and continue obsessing over and watching my favorite robot show and not deal with any of this unnecessary and childish drama anymore!

Anyways, for those who don't know, there's been a lot of arguing and fighting in the Murder Drones fandom as of lately, at least on over on Twitter, but it's been happening over on things like Tik Tok, even YouTube and it isn't uncommon exactly, but it is something that's gotten worse in as the show continues to grow in popularity. The main discussion and arguments when it comes to shipping in the Murder Drones fandom are between Envy (N X V) and Nuzi (N X Uzi) there's other ships in the fandom people like, but Envy and Nuzi are two of the most popular ones and the ones who are often the topics when it comes to shipping wars. I've already discussed and talked about the craziness and drama that's been happening with the fandom with some fans harassing and going after the VA's, people getting on them for their opinions, trying to switch things around to fulfill their egos, ect. But, the main thing I'm going to be talking about with today's topic is Nuzi and the amount of unnecessary hate it's gotten and how I think it's unfair, because it's seriously gotten worse and worse. And if you don't know what the ship Nuzi is and aren't very familiar with the ship or MD itself as a whole, basically, Nuzi is the pairing between Serial Designation N and Uzi Doorman from Murder Drones, who are two of our main characters in the show. Now, people have been shipping these two since the pilot and have enjoyed their interactions and at first in the beginning of the show it seems the show was hinting at the two being just good friends but as time went on, the show started to develop and explore the two and things started to change and the show has started hinting at both N and Uzi starting an eventual romance down the line and hinting at some romantic tension going between them. Now with Uzi, it seems she's definitely starting to fall in love with N and gaining feelings for him, but she seems to downside her crush on him and it's pretty one-sided since meanwhile with N and his side of things, he seems clueless and isn't aware of Uzi's feelings and it seems that he only sees Uzi as a friend and nothing more beyond that and the show hasn't hinted on how N feels about Uzi right now..of course, it's too early to tell for where the relationship between these two will go and it's too early to have N and Uzi fall in love and start an relationship but there is potential and room for them to start a relationship eventually, there's room to dive more into their dynamic and relationship and potential to have a good romance between the two.

Now, as I've stated..Nuzi has gotten an extreme amount of hate lately, some misinformation and rumors have been spread around in the fandom to the point it's caused people to start attacking others who are fans/love the ship and started going after and harassing fans who make fanart of the two, anits and especially diehard shippers of both Envy and Thuzi, (but it's mostly Envy shippers) keep on throwing around and saying the excuses on how Nuzi is a "P*oship" and how N is an adult and Uzi is a minor and how they're siblings, or say how, "Uzi has a crush on Thad!" "N has a crush on V and even admitted it!!" And they'll just use EVERY excuse in the book..they'll turn shit around and do whatever they can to make people feel bad and shitty for simply even adoring and liking Nuzi and finding it cute, hell it's even gotten to the point where some fans started going after others for liking other ships in the fandom like Vizzy/Pink Lemonade, and just any ships involving WD X DD. I'm not kidding, I've seen fans and others argue that Nuzi wouldn't work out because both N and Uzi are different robot species and how on N has killed and slaughtered Uzi's people. Apparently because both N and Uzi can't make a good pairing because they're apparently, "boring and uninteresting" and one is a WD and the other is a DD, but because both V and N are DD's and because they knew each other in the past that automatically means something..? Seriously?? I'm not joking when I say some of these fans are downright ridiculous and childish, they'll do whatever they can to stop people from liking ships like Nuzi and shame people for even enjoying it and make childish hate posts on said ship constantly, and it's overall just so hurtful and ridiculous, Dude. And it's people like them that make this fandom look awful and downright toxic, it's people like them that make others think that everyone in the fandom is like this when that's far from the truth!

I'm honestly really sick and tired of how this fandom mistreats and bullies other people just for simply liking different ships, people have stated that they feel hurt and feel like they can't like certain ships without them being attacked and shitted on, they feel like they can't like something they enjoy without others dragging them down and being hated on. It's ridiculous how some of these fans see Nuzi as the most awful and horrendous ever made and it needs to be forgotten forever. It's ridiculous and laughable how some of these people point out and rant on how much they hate Nuzi, only to make it the only thing they talk about and mention 24/7, some of these people literally just whine and complain about how they're not a fan of said ship. I mean, it's totally fine and okay to not like certain ships and you don't have to love and enjoy the same things as others do, but you don't need to make hate posts all the time and bash others for finding comfort and liking the ship they like, you don't need to make rants 24/7 on how you despite said ship..it just makes you look so damn childish and just unbearable, like okay..you're not a fan of certain ships, okay? JUST MOVE ON!! WE GET IT, just stop harassing and making us feel like shit and horrible people, stop making us feel terrible for loving Nuzi, just move on and just don't interact with us if it bothers some of you so damn much. I mean, it's gotten so bad that some have left the MD fandom because of the toxicity and childish behavior from some of these fans. Just please stop and be nice to one another, it's not right how some of you will harass and do whatever you can to make people feel shitty for enjoying what they love and trying to paint them out as these awful individuals. Like seriously, I just cannot stand shipping wars and I really despise them, shipping wars are such a waste of time and are just an excuse to harass and cause unnecessary drama and it just results with people getting hurt. And I've said this many times before and I'm gonna say it again, shipping shouldn't be the ONLY thing to focus on when watching and getting into any piece of media. There's much more to love and look forward to, there's more to appreciate and shows have more to offer than just ships, SHIPPING AIN'T EVERYTHING.

One more thing I'm gonna add and talk about before we finish up is that..I don't even understand and get the hate Nuzi has received, I mean I'm fine and totally alright with people seeing them as friends and respect their opinions. But, what's with some of these people just disliking and harassing people for seeing the two more than just friends and wanting them to be something more? I've seen people argue and say that it's either too cliche and just call both Uzi and N, Starco 2.0. And it's just ridiculous how some of these fans and antis act whenever there's moments with Uzi and N together or when the show is hinting at a possibility of the two being an item someday. Is this seriously how these toxic fans are gonna act whenever Nuzi have any moments together?? Whether it's romantic or not? It just seems the idea of Uzi and N being something more just burns these fans up inside and just frustrates them to the core. Nuzi ISN'T what you guys think it is and it's more than that, nothing is being rushed and forced and nothing is being written poorly between them either, and they AREN'T another Starco. Also, Nuzi isn't just here for fanservice, these moments we've gotten with Uzi and N were already planned out and worked on, MD has been in the works and in production since about 2020, wayyy before the show even came out and before the fandom was even a thing. Uzi and N were already planned and hinted at being something more and having something special between them, they were always meant to have something deeper and important and the show seems to be going the route in wanting to develop further into Uzi and N's dynamic and their relationship as a whole. The scenes we've gotten for Uzi and N have always been planned out and if Nuzi happens and becomes a thing in the series, it's because Liam wants it to be and planned it that way, NOT BECAUSE OF FANSERVICE!! It's fine if you're not a fan of the pairing and just don't find any interest in it, you can love and like what you want. But please stop acting like it's a big deal and something to get angry about, because it's not..it's not worth it. It's not worth throwing tantrums and acting over the top about, just move on and ignore.

Anyways, this is all I've wanted to talk about when it comes to this Nuzi hate and the drama that surrounds the ship when it comes to the fandom, I've just wanted to give my thoughts. Also, everyone in the Murder Drones Community, just PLEASE be nice and kind to one another and respect each other's opinions. ♥️ You guys are better than this and getting into arguments and shipping wars aren't worth it and are just plain silly, doing any of this just results in people being hurt and affected, getting into shipping wars aren't worth it and they're are better things to do. Please, be nice to each other and if you aren't a fan of certain ships in the show then that's fine and alright. Just move on and scroll away and respect other's feelings and opinions, you don't have to like a ship that's popular or what many seem to like! Just don't be a dick and treat others like crap and make hate posts just because you're not a fan of said ship, just please move on and keep moving forward! Plain and simple, just ignore and move on with your day, mistreating and hurting others just isn't worth it.

[evilkitten3]

big fanfic pet peeve of mine is character bashing. if you hate a character you should put work into it. bashing is half-assed. usually that's not even the same guy anymore. show me the mf you hate, don't just stack a bunch of Bad Traits together and write DooDooHead on his face. lazy hatred, disgusting

whatever happened to hater pride

[squidkid15]

I feel like most of the hate for the movie boils down to one of two things (and sometimes both!)

1. They wanted SA2 the movie instead of sonic movie 3

2. For some reason thinking the trailer was going to or has spoiled the entire movie??? And there will be absolutely no twists or surprises??

Like if you're in camp 1 that's fair and valid to be disappointed. I'm sorry the movie wasn't what you wanted it to be. But...did you really EXPECT it to be? The first 2 movies didn't follow the games and established a completely different world and timeline. Why would the 3rd movie be any different? Fundamental parts of SA2 rest on things that could never happen in the movie based on the canon established. The master Emerald would have a tough time being stolen and then broken. The eclipse canon can't run on chaos emeralds, they've been inside the Master Emerald and hidden for certainly longer than 50+ years when the ark would have been built. The movie was going to be an adaptation of SA2 (and apparently morphed with parts of Shadow's game too) not a recreation. And that's always what it was going to be.

I'm sorry you wanted an orange and got an apple. I really am. But why are you mad at the apple for not tasting like an orange. Like it was always gonna taste like an apple. It's an apple.

And camp 2 is like...either a fundamental or maliciously intentional misunderstanding of how trailers work. It's a TRAILER. It's 3 minutes out of a 90-ish minute movie, stitched together to make you intrigued without spoiling the plot.

There's gonna be surprises in the movie! Sonic is working for GUN in the trailer, bummer, but we have 87 other minutes for him to go "Hey wait that's bad" and stop working with them. Amy and Rouge aren't in the trailer, that sucks. But there's 87 other minutes for them to show up! To be a surprise! Super Sonic wasn't in the trailer for movie 2! Gerald's alive? No the horror! Or is he? We don't know! Could be a trick or a twist!

Cuz that's what movies HAVE.

Twists! Surprises! Cool shit to make people go "YOOOOO!"

Trailers? Good ones DON'T spoil the entire plot of the movie. And assuming you know the entire movie based off 3 minutes is - again - either a fundamental or malicious misunderstanding.

Anyways just let people be excited. If you're not, that's fair and fine. You have every right not to be. But like. Idk. Don't shit on people for it??? Maybe??? Is that too much to ask???

[jjcocker]

am i

[1tsstargaze59]

I haven't been really active lately I feel like,, sorry! Honestly, my weekend was pretty trash, irl shenanigans, but I'm doing OK now! Plus College is really starting to pick up and if yk anything about how that is, it's a snowball down a mountain XD

But hey! I found a new fav music artist ^^ (it's Laufey if you're wondering) and I took a break (sorta) from art, because of sad-, but now I'll get back to it! My hyperfixation on this franchise is FAR from dead, I promise you, it's here to stay for A WHILE ✨️

-Stargaze~☆

[its-a-beautful-day]

Been thinking about how it feels, being the wild child

the struggle of not feeling human, when emotions get too strong,

when hands feel like paws and teeth become fangs, shoulders and hunches raised in anger and low growls of fear,

somehow this body language is easier, is more natural than my own

[deoidesign]

Guys you're not gonna believe this. The books are wrong again

At least this time I didn't even get half of them and half of what I did get was damaged...? So I only have another 70 books to deal with... This time they're soft touch......

I've got so many of book 2 it's not even funny