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ultravi0lence14 · 2 months ago

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Witchy Woo

sam winchester x witch!reader

2k | fluff, slight angst, fem pronouns

summary: calling on their witch friend to help with a case, sam might get a lot more than he bargained for when he fears she’s gotten hurt.

warnings: choking, moderate level of violence

your relationship with the winchesters had started rocky, to say it lightly.

you were a witch, born in a long lineage of wiccan’s who used their powers for evil, subsequently getting killed by hunters in the process. you, on the other hand, weren’t like that. your mom tried to get you to see the family craft, to see what your legacy was, but you just couldn’t.

there was already enough bad in the world, why be one of the people enabling it when you could help do good and get rid of it?

at first, the winchesters didn’t see that so easily. they were raised on the pretences that if something was of supernatural being, then you kill it. so when they showed up in your home town investigating a case, you were the first suspect on their list.

the two men came barging into your home, spewing non sense about how you were hexing town residents and that they had the bullets to end your magical killing spree. you were confused, as you would never kill people and actually were great friends with some of victims found dead by a witches hand.

after semi convincing them that you were good, you helped the winchester boys track down the real culprit — with a lot of grumbling from dean in the process. turns out, it was valerie edmonds. the middle aged divorcee who lived down the street from your house. if you were being honest, you were quite surprised she was a witch, for she never gave you that vibe in the slightest.

since then, the winchester’s have called you if they needed a specific type of magical help on a case. it took a lot of time and work for them to fully grasp that you meant no harm. but when it stuck, you were practically apart of the team.

now, as you drove into the parking lot of some dingy motel, trying to spot out the winchester’s room number, you think back onto how you guys met. how everything that has happened since then has felt so surreal to you.

you helped people in your town, but never on a bigger scale like sam and dean did. it felt nice, finally being able to feel like you are really making a difference in the world.

barley lifting your hand from knocking on the wooden door, the hinges creaked as non other than dean winchester swung it open, giving you a tight lipped smile as he let you into the motel room. sam was sat at a small wooden table, hunched over with his eyes glued to his computer screen, reading some article he found on this cases lore.

you were slightly new to what a hunter’s day to day life was, for you had only met the winchester boys shy of a year ago. you’d assume, the half eaten pizza boxes and multiple beer bottles littered on the floor was an accustom to the lifestyle

those weren’t your only thoughts as you stepped through the threshold. your eyes couldn’t help but latch onto sam’s hunched figure, face drawn into concentration as he searched and searched for anything on this vengeful spirit they were after.

ever since you had gotten slightly acquainted with the two, you couldn’t help but harbour a slight crush towards the younger of the brothers. he was so soft spoken, sweet in how he treated victims families or anyone in general. how could you not fall in love with him?

the bed springs squeaked as you sat on mattress, dean moving to sit at the table with sam. as you sat your bag beside you, dean broke the somewhat awkward silence in the room. “let’s just cut to the chase already. Y/N, we need your witchy ass for this case.” sam finally looked up from his computer, turning your way and smiling at your form, making a light blush dust your cheeks as you smiled back.

“what do you need help with? is there any spell or ingredients i need to look for?” the look on dean’s face was juxtaposing what you expected his reaction to be. he looked almost guilty, like what he was about to say was not going to be something you’d like.

scratching the back of his neck, dean opened up about what plan he had already devised. “well, it looks like the spirit we are hunting is going after witches. so i thought that maybe you, i don’t know, lure it out?” your face was passive, not really knowing what to think. dean didn’t specify what you would be doing this certain hunt. but to his knowledge, you could easily hold yourself against an angry ghost, so you were trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

sam, on the other hand, was not having a second of what his brother was suggesting.

“no,” he stated, shutting his laptop almost to make a point. “absolutely not. we are not putting her in danger.” his eyes kept glancing back to you, almost as if the mere mention of you luring out the ghost was getting you killed.

standing from the bed, you walked over to sam and put your hand on his shoulder, getting him to turn his head and stare up at you with the widest eyes you’ve ever seen. if you were being honest, you almost gave in and agreed with sam right then and there.

but you held your ground, smiling at him as dean looked incredulously between you two. “sam,” you started. “i will be fine. i have handled worse, and you and dean will be there if something goes wrong.” this made him relax slightly, looking over to his brother before grabbing your hand on his shoulder and squeezing it.

“that’s settled.” said dean, getting up from the chair and moving towards his duffle bag. “we leave for the club this ghost hunts at in fifteen.”

walking towards your bag, you turned to dean with your hands on shoulders. “one thing though. you two aren’t putting me in some shitty ideal of what clothes witches wear. got it?”

“i can’t believe we agreed to let you wear those poser clothes.” dean grumbled, in the drivers seat of baby as you got ready to go into the bar. “this ghost will never believe your a witch in that.” his comment made you laugh, stopping halfway out the car as you turned your body to look at him. “are you forgetting dean that i am the only witch here? i think i would know what the supposed attire is.”

dean huffed as you got out of the impala, giving yourself a once over in your mid length, cloth dress. waving goodbye to the boys as your brown boots shuffled against the gravel of the parking lot. the white of your dress reflecting the sun as sam watched the bar door shut behind you.

he was worried, to put it lightly. he knew you could handle yourself but he never liked you putting yourself in imminent danger. his thoughts were stopped as he looked over to dean, who was giving sam a certain look that had the younger winchester reeling back in confusion.

sighing to himself, dean leaned his arm on the window and looked over at his brother. “dude, she’ll be fine. you are just worried cause you’ve got a fat crush on her.” the shock in sam’s face was enough to make dean laugh, putting the car in drive so that him and sam could go and find the cemetery where the spirit was buried.

“i do not have a crush on her!” sam sounded so exasperated, that an actual bark of laughter left dean. making the older winchester shake his head as he turned out of the parking lot. “whatever you say, sammy.”

on your end of things, you had sat yourself at the bar top, remembering how sam said that the ghost usually strikes after the victim had a couple of drinks in their system. you didn’t want to drink too much, for being tipsy wouldn’t help with stopping the ghost. so you resulted to one margarita, nursing a cup of coke for the rest of the night.

when you got a text from dean on the go ahead, you got up from the stool, paying your tab as you inconspicuously made your way to the alley behind the bar, pacing back and forth as you waited for the ghost to appear.

as you started losing hope in this plan, a force from behind you grabbed your arm and threw you into the nearest wall. groaning on the impact, you looked up to see a ghastly looking woman, ripped dress blowing behind her as she snarled in your direction.

she disappeared to then only reappear right in front of you, grabbing your neck and lifting you against the wall. you struggled to breathe as you waited for the boys to burn her bones. but that didn’t come as fast as you hoped. you were starting to lose consciousness, scratching at the ghosts arms and wishing you brought some iron with you.

a futile attempt to mumble out a spell was crushed as the ghost squeezed tighter, cutting off your airways and making it almost impossible for you to speak.

with your last shreds of consciousness dangling in your hands, you heard a loud shriek as the ghost let go of you, dropping you to the ground and erupting in flames, disappearing forever.

swallowing in deep gasps of air, you got up from the ground and steadied yourself against the wall. slowly walking to where the parking lot was and waiting on the side of the road for dean and sam to pull up in the impala.

when you heard the faint rumble of the comforting car, you looked up to see sam jump out of the passenger seat before dean could even throw it into park. the younger winchester ran over to you, grabbing your arms and inspecting his eyes up and down your frame, making sure you were okay.

“sam, i’m fine.” you laughed as he worriedly brushed some mud off the front of your dress. that only caused him to look up and gasp slightly, bringing his hands to the side of your neck as he turned your head back and forth.

“oh baby, your neck. it’s all bruised.” you hadn’t even looked at the aftermath of the ghosts firm grip on your neck, now not wanting to as the sorrow in sam’s eyes from the mere sight of it made your heart drop.

all you could do was shake your head, holding onto sam’s forearms with your own hands. “i’m fine, sammy. i’m alive, the ghost is gone.” but that didn’t seem to sooth his freaked expression, only being able to hear his quick inhales of breath and the wind blowing around you.

gulping in some air, sam shook his head, speaking his next words in one breath. “i was so scared, i can’t lose you.” sam had barley finished his sentence before his lips crushed to yours, moving his one hand to cup your face and the other to wrap around your waist.

you gasped into his mouth, hands going to the back of his head to grab onto the tuffs of hair at the back of his neck. he was pulling you impossibly closer, almost as if he could mold your body’s together and never let you go.

pulling away, your hands went to the front of his brown carharrt jacket, looking into his eyes with such intensity that a normal person would be inclined to look away. but not sam, he could stare into your eyes forever.

breathing in deeply, sam leaned his face closer to yours. “i told myself if you were okay that i wouldn’t wait anymore. i can’t go another day without being with you, i just can’t.” his words sent tears to your eyes, reaching up so you could properly hug him.

his arms went around your waist, and everything just felt better. sam was yours, and you were his, and everything just felt like it should be. as sam pulled away, he planted a firm kiss on your cheek, grabbing your hand and leading you towards the impala. “cmon, my love, dean’s probably getting impatient.”

watching the two of you walk hand in hand, dean just chuckled to himself, turning so he could throw the car out of park. “fucking finally.”

**can’t lie, i wrote most of this either in class or munching on a rice bowl

#supernatural #imagine #sam winchester #sam winchester imagine #sam winchester x reader #supernatural x reader #sam x reader

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akitasimblr · 4 months ago

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oooh nooo!! malevolent god has spoken! you may be wondering who is the target of malevolent god's wrath?

well... araminta had the highest level of friendship so... 🫤 but she is okay!!!

yes, sierra, the gods are not happy with you. and HEY! BO! you're dead, so stop worrying about 'dying', gotcha? plus... we'll be having a cursed lot for 24 hours, my face exactly, araminta!

my heart aches staring at bo's contemplation of his own urn 💔💔💔 anselme is still learning to live with a ghost, but he is not particularly startled.

okay, emotions are all over the place today. sierra and araminta are becoming besties. anselme is - weirdly - happy with the fact that they angered the gods...??? in one minute, dodo is laughing out loud with bo's jokes; and the next, he is feeling guilty for not being able to save bo's life... and guess who's RIGHT THERE to comfort him??? lucian, my friends, LUCIAN <33

valerie is sick of chitchat. let's get some work done, contestants!!!

bo, the farmer; lyric, the cleaner; lucian, the miner; valerie, the treasure hunter!

there's a real friendship growing here, people... 😉

and another one building here too ❤️❤️❤️

but no one makes dodo laugh like bo or anselme do *winks, winks* see you tomorrow ;)

🌴previous | next🌴

bo cash by @ravingsockmonkey sierra mitchell by @tipsy-clouds anselme parmentier by @agena87 valerie queens by @enchanting-whim araminta hearst-irsay by @ethicaltreatmentofcowplants lyric cross by @micrathene-w lucian vinca by @jonquilyst

#mad about dodo #bo cash by ravingsockmonkey #sierra mitchell by tipsy clouds #orlando harper #anselme parmentier by agena87 #valerie queens by enchanting whim #araminta hearst irsay by ethicaltreatmentofcowplants #lyric cross by micrathene w #lucian vinca by jonquilyst

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ranticore · 1 month ago

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I thought I'd make a quick "here's how u pronounce" for some names/words in inver & hibernogallic (the french language spoken there)

If I was really hardcore about it I'd post voice clips of me saying the words but if I did then u would know that i am shocking bad at french

Inver - not pronounced like the real world place Inver. It's more like "awn-ver"

Esk - not what you think - try to mash "esk" and "ash" into one word while you say it Comes from the first syllable of Eiscir.

Félix - sorry fellas it's "fay-LEES" as in 'lease'.

Senca - that's "San-ka"

Islin - you can pelt me with sticks and rocks for this one. It's "Ish-la"

Ó Donnchadha [Islin's surname] - irl this is the root of "O Donohue" but it's not spoken that way. "Dun-a-ha" is the best way I can write that without explaining how lenition sounds ('cha')

Erica - short for Ericales so it's like "er-ee-ka", not the feminine form of Eric.

Sionnach [Eri's surname]- "shun-ach" again with the soft ch. You can google how to pronounce that one

Carhaix - no fuckin clue I think it's car-ay

Lough - just say "lock" don't even try anything else

D'Ouilly - it's like Dwilly but ppl in Inver sometimes call them Dawleys.

Sidhe - you know how to pronounce this one

Searrach - if you got Sionnach right then you can work this one out too I believe in you

Amhan - that's "awan" and yes from the same root as avon

Invergorken - from Inbhearr Ceann, locals would scrub out the middle syllable and just say "Inverken". You can tell an outsider by their more careful pronunciation

Síofra - "shee-fra"

Valéry - not like Valerie, heavy stress on the second syllable so it's "vaLERy"

Ye - everyone is wrong about this. It's not "yeh" it's YEE and it's a plural "you". Similar to yous, yeez, or y'all

Wycombe - a real place I've been to multiple times and we'd see the road signs and go ahh it's WHY-CUM-BEE but it is in fact pronounced wiccam or if you prefer, Wickham. Basically the only time I let a character have an English name.

Some additional notes on the language - it's mutually intelligible with hibernian and aquitanian but considered really ugly by native speakers of both those languages. The most common complaint is that it sounds like someone speaking their language through a mouthful of rocks

There are no standalone words for "yes" or "no" - when they are used (and I made sure while writing that they are not used often in dialogue), it's usually as an additional affirmative in a sentence, and not in answer to a question. I slipped up a few times tho

To answer a question in the affirmative or negative instead of saying yes or no, you just repeat the verb from the question - "did you sleep?"/"I did" - "have you seen this?"/"I haven't"

#mvf

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bejeweledblondie · 6 months ago

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Peggy, The Pin Up

A/N: I apologize for being MIA I’ve had a lot of very great but time consuming things take over my life! I’ve started a 1940s vintage clothing blog & I’m shocked at how successful it has become. On top of that I’ve got promotions at work & it’s opened so many doors for me. I’m hoping to write a bit more!

Warnings: classic 1940’s sexism, mentions of nudity, female pronouns

Summary: Y/N never expected for her pin up prints to be put out… it causes some disruption on Abbott-Thorpe & one dark curly haired aviator comes to her rescue

It all happened on a Thursday morning at breakfast. Y/N sat there in her crisp white uniform shoveling the chalky yellow substance the army called eggs in her mouth. A dark shadow appeared above her plate & a magazine was plopped down in front of her.

“Don’t even try to deny it, this is you isn’t it?” He asked with a hint of amusement in his voice. Speechless she looked away & noticed that the Army’s shipment of Esquire hit the shelves. “God who knew? We knew you were a tease, but this is just another level.” He started. “Do you know what everyone says about you?” She shook her head shamefully, lying to herself. She had heard rumblings in the sick bay from time to time. Sometimes while fixing a patients IV bag or a even helping move a patient a hemline might rise causing a stir.

Before the pilot could continue his chauvinistic teasing session she immediately grabbed her belongings & swiftly exited. Little did she know a dark curly haired pilot was watching the torment happen. Due to rank he couldn’t intervene but oh he so badly wanted to bury the man six feet under. He had grown fond of the nurse, she was always so kind with his men. Incredibly soft spoken & nurturing when it came to the care she provided. He had walked in on her reading a copy of John Steinbeck’s, “Of Mice & Men” to the wounded pilots one evening. She didn’t have to do that, she could’ve been out dancing at the Officer’s Club. But she voluntarily chose to stay after her shift to read to them. He could tell the men greatly appreciated it too, it gave them a small window of comfort during an incredibly traumatic moment in their lives.

Douglass, also watching the debacle rolled his eyes & sipped his coffee.

“These men act like they’ve never seen tits before it’s insane.” He scoffed. Rosie almost choked on the toast he was eating.

“I mean some are freshly turned eighteen.” Blakely reminded him.

“Still, this is going to cause a huge fucking problem.” He swore. “Rosenthal, you okay?” Rosie had been staring off into the space during the duration of the conversation.

“Go to her,” Douglass sighed. “She may be oblivious but I’m not. You’ll also want to scoop her before someone like Egan does.” With that Rosie excused himself & started to head towards the medical ward. The sterile white environment contrasted heavily from the drab olive green darkness of the mess hall. Injured pilots laid in beds reading the paper, being fed their morning breakfast, or having their vitals taken. Valerie, a nurse he knew was friendly with Y/N was checking the vitals on a young sergeant.

“Val!” He said getting her attention & started over to her. “Have you seen Y/N?” He asked.

“Yeah, she seemed a bit off,” She started. “She begged Major to allow her to just work in supply today. You might wanna try there.”

“Thank you.” Rosie replied & made his way to the supply room. There she stood sniffling & rolling gauze. Her eyes were clouded with a melancholy look as she completed the mundane task. He knocked on the door frame causing her to look up slightly startled.

“Oh Major Rosenthal it’s you,” She said with a slight tremble in her voice. “What can I do for you?” He cringed at her using his rank, usually it would make his blood pressure rise & heart race. But this circumstance was entirely different.

“I saw what happened in the chow hall,” He started. She’s started to wipe away tears. “I just wanted to see how you were doing.” He said wringing anxiously. She sighed deeply & looked away.

“I’ll be alright,” She stated. “I’m just going to lay low for a few weeks.” It broke his heart to see her this way. She was always a little jumpy & anxious to begin with. This situation just poured gasoline on a oil fire.

“No,” Rosie stated. “You shouldn’t let some asshole make you feel uncomfortable.” She stared him with big wide eyes. “If it makes you feel any better I’ll escort you places.” Her eyes softened as she listened to him. A small crimson warmth crept onto her cheeks at the mere mention of him escorting her.

After a few weeks, the heat died out about the pin up nurse. Rosie & Y/N had become closer over the weeks. His protection meant no one would even try to touch a hair on her head. From lingering touches, longing gazes, & of course Rosie sitting on her nightly readings to the wounded pilots. He (like every man on post who took a liking to her) did keep a copy of the pin up photo.

On missions he’d keep the folded piece of paper tucked into the pocket of his sheepskin. A reminder of what he was protecting & fighting for. His calloused thumb would graze over her innocent smile as he admired the image. Even in his bunk, he’d spend some alone time with it after everyone had fallen asleep. During one night after the pin up photo was brought up by a rookie pilot, & in turn making Y/N uncomfortable. Rosie knew he had to make her see what he saw in the photo. After some discussions with Ken Lemmons, he decided to really make sure he was reminded everyday was he was fighting for.

With hands covering her eyes he directed her to the airstrip.

“Rosie I can’t see!” Y/N giggled, tripping over her own feet. He chuckled at her natural clumsiness. “Where are we going?”

“You’ll see, you’re so impatient.” He said. He lead her right up the nose to his beloved bomber. “Okay now you can see.” With the removal of his hands & a adjustment to the sunlight she was staring at herself painted on the side of his bomber. The same pin up that graced Esquire months ago that brought them together. She gasped in pure shock at the artwork.

“Oh, Rosie.” She gasped unable to speak. “Did you paint this?”

“With a little help from Lemmons.” He replied. “I want you to see what I see. A beautiful woman. Do you like it?”

“I-wow,” She smiled. “I love it.” She turned around to face him. He was staring down her, admiring the way the sun light reflected off her hair. He brushed stray strands of hair behind her ear. His hand lightly danced across her cheek bone as he stared adoringly into her eyes. He leaned down & placed a tender kiss onto her lips. She reciprocated & kissed back. Her arms wrapped around his neck & his slowly gravitated to her waist pulling her in closer. After pulling a part they rested foreheads against one another.

“God you have no idea how long I’ve always wanted to do that,” He admitted.

#mastersoftheair #mota #robert rosenthal #rosie rosenthal #rosie rosenthal x reader #masters of the air head cannons #Robert Rosenthal imagines #harry crosby #mota headcanons #bucky egan #masters of the air imagines #hambone hamilton #pinupgirl #band of brothers #band of brothers imagines #hbo war #the pacific

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redbleedingrose · 2 years ago

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Always ~ Epilogue Part 1

Summary: You and Azriel have been best friends for years after you joined the inner circle as the top healer in Velaris. But with Elain and Nesta’s recent arrival, Azriel has begun to ignore your friendship in favor of being together with Elain. You are heartbroken, and it is Starfall where you will be confined in the house of wind with Azriel and Elain. Everything will be okay though… right? Word count: ~9.4K Warnings: Angst, minor spice, fluff, first time writing, some of it is unedited Masterlist, Part 7, Epilogue Part 2 A/N: I want to start off by saying, I am so sorry this took so long to come out with. I wanted it to be perfect, and part of that came with some writers block and partially due to some demotivation. Anyways, I hope that you all love this epilogue. I have a part 2 that will be out soon and then I will work on requests I have gotten. As always, please please please like, reblog and comment. I love hearing your guys' thoughts. It always means so so much to me.

1 Month Later

It had been a long day at the clinic, most of it was spent waiting in the morning, and then you were slammed with patients back to back with complicated medical histories, that were dealing with the frostbite from the winter cold. Last night, temperatures had dropped below freezing in Valeris, and the people of the city were wholly unprepared. Your healing magic was essentially drained, and you were practically racing to leave, eyes heavy with sleep, before Majda could call you back in to work with another patient.

You wrapped your dark cloak around your shoulders tightly, pulling up the hood to protect yourself from the frigid winter wind that had afflicted so many of your patients today. Usually, you loved the cold weather, especially when it was complemented with snowfall. But the wind… well… that was another story. You pushed the door to the clinic open with your gloved hand, pulling up your cobalt blue wool scarf wrapped around your neck to cover your nose which was already dripping a thin mucus. You were not looking forward to the journey back home despite being less than a mile walk back.

“Dove?”

Your heart jumped into your throat for a moment as the familiar husky voice called on you. It had been weeks since you had seen him, not for his lack of effort, but more-so because you weren’t ready. Last time you had spoken with Azriel, you had given him your permission to try and make it up to you. And for the first week, you were able to handle it. He visited you every night, until you couldn’t anymore.

And then you asked him for distance. For some time. Some space.

And he gave it to you.

But everyday, he came by the clinic, whenever he wasn’t away on a mission, patiently waiting to see if you wanted him to walk you home. Most days, you turned him away, reasoning with yourself that you were too tired, too busy and exhausted from your workload to deal with the emotions of seeing Az again. You loved him. There was no question in that statement. There was no doubt in that statement. You loved him with all of your heart, and you knew that you would continue to love him until the end of time. But… you weren’t ready to deal with the pain that love had brought you.

You inhaled a deep breath, letting the chill air spread throughout your lungs, cooling the heat that was forming within you. Inhale and exhale. Inhale and exhale. And again. And again. Slowly turning to peer over at the male who was standing a couple of feet away, his jaw clenched as he eyed your form, glancing up and down as if he was studying you. As if he was looking for something… as if he was trying to find any injuries. Even in his distance, you knew that Az had been keeping a watch on you, a friendly shadow of his slithering through the clinic as you worked, collecting information and judging any of the patients who walked through the front doors to be treated by you, following you home until you shut the door behind you, speedily returning to his master to report his findings. To report that you had arrived home, unharmed and safe.

He stood tall, wings tucked in tight against his back, probably to protect the membranous structures from the winter of Valeris, soaking in the heat that radiated so thoroughly off his body. In one gloved hand, Azriel clutched a small box, and in the other, he held a book that was nearly bursting at the seams, tiny papers sticking out, marking different pages, most likely lined with the thoughts of the shadowsinger as he read the book. “I– I just wanted to drop these off to you… warm almond croissants from your favorite cafe. I figured after a long day of work, it would be a nice treat.” The puffs of air that followed his words were visible in the cold weather, and he rocked back and forth on his toes looking like a young boy who was nervously awaiting a punishment. His eyes flickered back and forth between yours, a flash of hesitancy at your lack of response before taking a step forward, setting the annotated book on top of the box before holding it out to you, arm fully outstretched as if to keep his distance. “I uh… I read this book a couple of days ago. And it is a masterpiece… truly it… it was heartbreaking. But it was also one of the most beautiful stories I have ever read. I– I couldn’t stop thinking of you while reading it, so I noted everything that I noticed that I thought you would enjoy.”

The book was a long one, thick on its own. And the little papers the spymaster had stuck inside, held a small portion of the book open. He must’ve been thinking about you a lot if he had that many thoughts he wanted to share. This wasn’t a new thing for you two. Honestly, before Elain… before under the mountain even, you would spend entire evenings together reading stories that we had picked out for each other. It would take the entire night just to get through one book because of how often he would lean over to tell you his thoughts. So much so, you would give up reading your book all together, just so you could sit next to the male to watch his reactions as he read the story out loud. And then, the next night, you would read your book to him, allowing for him to observe your reactions in real time. You could tell that a lot of thought has gone into this small gift, this small token of reassurance that Az had remembered you, had thought of you in the time you had spent apart.

“It–,” he hesitated as he watched you gape at the gift he was holding out to you, faltering, thinking he had overstepped, “It’s a love story. I– I know it's a lot, you don’t have to–” The tip of his ears flushed a deep red in embarrassment at your hesitance, interpreting it as obvious discomfort, a stark contrast to his usual stoic nature that comes with being spymaster.

You didn't let him finish, clearing your throat to dislodge the small lump that had formed, grasping the box that he had extended out before he used his shadows to winnow it out of this plane of existence. “Thank you, Az.” Your voice rasped at the sudden buildup of emotion. Every small gesture Azriel made shook you to your core in general… but now, after avoiding him for a couple of weeks… it created an initial sense of fight or flight. But the warmth from his gesture had you sinking into the affection of his reminders pointing towards the love he held for you.

Part of you was still in disbelief that the male you had pined after for so long, had also been pining after you as well, had been loving you in secret.

Another part of you clung to the disbelief, the pain of his behavior on Starfall, and the months preceding. It had left a raw ulcer on your heart that was struggling to heal. You knew it would take time. It would take effort. From you. And from Azriel. This type of pain wouldn’t dissipate with one conversation.

And maybe fear that your mate would ignore you, leave you, for Elain still ran rampant in your dreams despite his endless apologies. The small gestures though… They meant something. To you at least.

He let you process your emotions, allowing for you to ask him whatever you had wanted without any deference in his answers. He gave you space when you needed it, and in that first week when you did allow him to be near you, he held you close, letting you fall apart in his arms, whispering his regret into your hair as he pressed kisses into your temple. And in those moments…

The moments he held you close… the moments he would give you a small token of his remembrance of you when you thought he had forgotten… the moments where he made the rest of the world disappear into an ether with only you two left behind in each other's presence… Those were the moments that had a part of you yearning to pull him close, yearning to let his shadows surround you and play with you however they willed, yearning to never let him go, yearning to murmur expressions of love into kisses you would press to his lips and olive skin, yearning to accept the bond that tied you two together.

But it wouldn’t be fair to brush over the wound he had caused you, when he was supposed to be the one person who never inflicted you with any sort of harm. So… you allowed the part of you clinging to the disbelief and pain to hold you together.

You hadn’t realized you had been standing in silence for a long moment, the book now pressed flush against your chest as you held it to you, the smell of the croissants wafted from the box that you had situated under your armpit. Azriel hadn’t moved either, a flash of desperation in his hazel eyes swarmed before slipping behind the walls he had no doubt built to soothe the ache he felt in his very bones since you had pulled away from him. He cleared his throat, taking in a deep breath, “I was hoping we could read it together. Like old times,” it came out hoarse, laced with fear of rejection, “What do you think?”

You watched as he held his breath, body stiffening as he awaited your response, preparing for a soft denial that would send him into a private spiral of self loathing. But you had spent a long couple of weeks distancing yourself from the male, a very very long couple of weeks. And it had left you exhausted.

You were exhausted. Exhausted from sitting in the pain. Exhausted from forcing yourself away. Because in all honesty? You wanted Azriel near. You hated being away from him, each second away worsened the ache instead of helping it. You wanted his apologies and explanations. You wanted him to make it up to you. You wanted him to lick at your wounds. You wanted him to whisper sweet nothings to make you forget. You wanted him to read to you in the soft voice he had reserved only for you. You wanted him to pull you into a sway as you cooked dinner together. You wanted him to hold you, kiss you. You wanted him to love on you.

And that meant letting go of the fear that had motivated and inspired the distance. That meant letting go of the fear that he might abandon you, a fear that hurt too deeply to think on too long. It meant having faith in the mother and gods above. It… it meant trusting Azriel. It meant trusting his friendship. It meant trusting his adoration for you, his devotion to you. It meant trusting and putting faith into his love and trusting the mating bond.

So, you freed your hand from the grip you had on the book, and took a small step forward, inhaling his scent that sends waves of comfort through you, before twining your fingers with his, his shadows immediately curling around your wrist, “C’mon Az, let's go home and read this book together.”

His jaw dropped, pupils dilating in shock, but he shook himself out of it, a shy smile lilting his face as he nodded in agreement, highlighting the tiny dimple on his left cheek. He slowly moved closer to you, studying your reaction, trying to figure out where your boundaries existed so he wouldn’t cross them, knowing that if he did… it would ruin it. It would ruin the moment you had given him.

You graced him with your own small smile, a heat rising to your cheeks involuntarily, giving him the go-ahead to press his palms into yours. The warmth of his gloved hand seeped into yours, you squeezed at his knuckles with your firm grip which he returned with his own gentle pressure, thumbing at the back of your hand as if he was savoring the weight of your hand in his. With his entire body right next to yours, you could feel the heat radiating off the male, and you unconsciously leaned into it, his warm presence protecting you from the chill of the evening. And then… and then you started to walk together towards your apartment in a comfortable silence.

2 Months Later

Every muscle in your body ached as you laid on the chase in the living room of the house of wind, eyes heavy with exhaustion. You weren’t sure what had you feeling so motivated this morning, but every bit of that feeling had dissipated the second training had started.

It was a rare thing really, to join the valkyries, Azriel, and Cassian this early in the morning. You were a healer, not a fighter. But Az had insisted that you join a couple of times a month to ensure you could, “look after yourself whenever I am not around.” You initially laughed him off, but it became quite clear the shadowsinger hadn’t been joking when his expression stayed flat, unmoving in his suggestion. You thought about arguing against it, but the worry he held in his eyes had your reservations sinking into the deepest part of the ocean, never to resurface.

So… when you woke up this morning feeling wide awake, you had tricked yourself into thinking, “why not?” and had made your way to the house of wind.

You quickly realized that had been a mistake.

With Azriel, you had expected for the male to be a harsh trainer. Of course he would be. He was the spymaster of the night court, darkness incarnate. You had expected nothing less. Which is why when Az and Cass asked who you would like to train with this morning, you had stupidly chosen Cassian.

In hindsight, maybe Az would have gone easier on you. Maybe he would have felt more sympathy towards your previous lack of training. Maybe he would have lessened the rigor of his training to accommodate you. Maybe he would have felt more mercy for his best friend, his mate.

In hindsight, you should’ve realized that Cassian would be just as strict with training, if not a little more. He is the general of the night court, commander of one of the best armies in Prythian. You should’ve realized Cass would have put you through the ringer, just because he could. Just because he would find it funny to watch you suffer.

But you hadn’t.

The brute had lulled you into a sense of ease at the start of training, the first hour was spent with him insisting on some stretching and correcting your form in different warrior positions. Something to do with correcting your balance, but at this point, you couldn’t force yourself to remember. When the other valkyries began to walk away, done with their training, you had followed thinking you were also done for the day, taking a couple of steps towards the water station to soothe the dryness that had formed in your throat. It was Cassian’s grip on your shoulder that prevented you from moving any further, “Where are you escaping off to little one? We still have more training,” with a smug smirk lilting his face, his muscled arms crossed over his chest.

You had looked at Azriel for help, forming a small pout of your lips, thinking the male would give in and save you from the torture you were about to experience. But the spymaster stared back at you with his eyebrows lifted, making no move to help you as he nodded back to Cassian, sending a tug of amusement down the bond, encouraging you to get back to training.

Gods, what a mistake that had been.

You should’ve just sent a vulgar gesture over at your mate, and made a run for your life.

But you gave into him.

The general had you running two miles, while the sun was blaring its unrelenting heat onto the exposed skin of your back, sending beads of sweat from your forehead down to your chin. You had stopped running at the half mile mark, opting to continue in a light jog only to spite the general who was yelling at you to move faster from across the ring.

You had nearly collapsed when you finished, clutching at your cramped side while Az and Cass made their way towards you, large grins spanning across their faces, clearly finding your near death experience amusing. You couldn’t even find the energy to push Cass off you when he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, “Walk it off little one, walk it off.” You immediately lifted your hand into the most vulgar gesture you could think of, groaning miserably in response. Az snickered offering you a small bottle filled with ice cold water in respite. You growled despite the sound from the shadowsinger sending tingles throughout your body, “Shut up before I kill you both.” The pants you were letting out interrupted you after every word, snatching the bottle from Az’s outstretched hand. Cassian roared with laughter, shaking your body slightly as he wisely chose not to verbally reply. Your lips twitched when Az sent waves of pride down the bond; his shadows snaking around your exposed skin, reaching around your neck, pressing in cool whispers of touch against the warmth causing you to shiver slightly.

Only the three of you were left in the training ring by the time you had cooled down, finishing off the training with stretching and a half-hearted promise to Cassian you would never return to this hell-hole as Az trailed behind you. You collapsed onto the chaise where you currently lay, “I am going to die Az, what the fuck?”

His shoulders shook in laughter as he maneuvered your head off the couch, settling down where it once rested, and relaxing shoulders onto his lap. He ran his fingers through your damp hair, hazel eyes gleaming with amusement, “You are not gonna die dove, you just need some more training.” You bristled at the thought, all the muscles in your body began loosening at his ministrations, eyes fluttering shut to savor his scent as it began to consume you, “No way Az, that was a one and done type thing. Never again.”

His silence was calming, and his shadows hovered over you so gently, they hypnotized you into a dozing state, one half of you aware of your surroundings while the other half of you couldn't care less, as long as Az was with you. This had become a common occurrence in the past couple of weeks since you had invited him back to your home. You spent the entire night, sitting on the floor in front of the hearth, reading to each other different passages of the tragedy, analyzing his initial thoughts of the book, and listening to each of his new opinions, while adding your own. It had been a beautiful book, just like Azriel had mentioned. A story of two lovers who were separated by time, only to find each other once again. Your breathing had deepend, and you were moments away from giving into the sleep as you recalled the night with a sense of fondness stroking your heart.

“Please dove,” a soft whisper, so soft that you almost missed it. Almost. But Azriel’s hands had paused from running through your hair, and the tone he used was nearing on desperation. The sleep slipped away from you as you opened your eyes to find him staring down at you, his lips pressed together so tight that the blood drained from them. You sat up, turning to face him and pulling his hands into your lap, confused at his sudden distress as the beating of his heart raced so hard within his chest, you could hear it from where you were sitting, your attention alert and on fully him, wanting nothing more than to calm him, to soothe him like he had with you, “What’s wrong Az?”

He takes a shuddering breath, “I need you to be okay. I– I need you to be safe,” his hazel iris’ flicked back and forth locked on yours, “I want to always be there by your side… but it's unrealistic to say I will be with you at every moment of every day protecting you. None of this is easy. My job. My life. It has come with a lot of enemies. It has come with a lot of unexpected betrayals. And I just can’t let anything happen to you. So I need you to be able to protect yourself when I am not there. Because when Amarantha took you under the mountain, I wasn’t there. I wasn’t there to protect you. And it is still something I haven’t been able to forgive myself for.” His brows furrowed, his grip on your hands tightening, squeezing once, twice, thrice. A shot of grief had your toes curling as he continued, “Everyday that you were gone was utter torture. Utter panic. The moment I couldn’t feel you anymore? I– I was in hysterics. Not knowing if you were okay… it is a feeling I never ever want to experience again. I need you. I can’t live with you. So… so I need you to do this training. For me. Okay, dove?”

You run your arms up his toned ones, skimming the veins and ridges with a light trace, wrapping them around his shoulders, hauling him into you. You rested your head against his shoulder right into his neck, breathing in his rich scent and rubbing at the tension he carried right between his wings, trying to ease the knots away. “Okay, Az.” You made the move to pull away so you could look him in the eyes and promise him you would continue the training, but he only tightened his grip around your waist, burying his face deep into your neck. You chuckled, shifting into his lap, your legs settling aside his thighs and tugging him even closer, just until your upper body was molding into his. You returned your face into the crook of his neck, enjoying the warmth he radiated.

Amarantha’s reign had left a lot of fae traumatized, and that included the fae who lived outside of the mountain. While you experienced the terror from within, Azriel was stuck outside, only the whispering of rumors giving him an idea of the kinds of suffering Rhys and you were subject to. You couldn’t even begin to imagine what it was like for him. To hear the things your high lord and mate were dealing with, not even knowing if it was their reality and wondering if they were suffering worse, knowing they were trapped by a spell and not knowing if you would ever see them again… for fifty years, Azriel sat like a sitting duck in that feeling. Resenting himself because you had gone with Rhys instead of him. Resenting himself because he hadn’t protected you from Amarantha. That he couldn’t protect you… wouldn’t be able to while you were trapped suffering only mother knows what. Your heart ached at the thought of your roles being reversed. If it had been Azriel stuck under the mountain, a mating bond unknown to him while you were completely aware, to have that bond go silent for fifty years without any notice, to live without knowing if he was dead or alive… it made you stomach churn. So, you ran your fingers across his back, toward his neck, and into his hair. Playing with the ends as you clung to each other in the fear of losing each other, in the hope that it would never happen again during your lifetimes.

3 Months Later

Your day had started out so wonderfully. The sky was cloudy, indicating the rainy day that was ahead of you, and the morning doves were singing a beautiful song you could hear through your open balcony doors. The chilly breeze slipped into the room that freshened the humid air of summer, Azriel’s membranous wing that covered you both serving as a small barrier when the wind cooled your warm skin that was pressed against him. You smiled into his bare chest, his shadows swirling around you as his finger ran up and down your arm that was splayed across his waist. The way the spymaster was nuzzling his face into your hair had you wanting to pause time in this moment forever, content with the feeling of the pulses of affection you were sending each other through your bond.

The day prior had been spent with the shadowsinger, starting with the training you had forced yourself to continue to attend to soothe your mates nerves. After completing your exercises, Azriel would fly you out to a cafe overlooking the sidra, where you would spend the rest of the morning drinking black coffee, while teasing Az for drinking caramel lattes. The male had a secret sweet tooth that very few people knew about, and these were the types of things you had picked up on during your years of friendship. During your years of pining after the male. He would always order you an almond croissant to-go once you finished with your coffee, and would insist on walking you to your work at the clinic. He would press a soft kiss to your cheek, promising to pick you up when you were headed home for the night so you could cook dinner together.

It had become a routine. A perfect routine. A routine that had your heart nearly bursting with joy every time you thought of it. A routine that had Az spending nearly the entire day with you at least three times a week, if not more. A routine that had Az spending the night nearly three times a week, if not more.

Dinner last night had been roasted chicken and potatoes that were easy to cook, and deliciously mouth-watering. Instead of sitting across the table, Az slid into the seat next to you, wrapping his left arm around the back of your chair as you ate together in quiet conversation. It was these mundane moments, these moments that were spent with only you two, these moments that were consuming your thoughts throughout your day, Gods, they had the bond that tied you together singing. Once you finished, he would extend his arm out, whisk you out of your seat, and embrace you into a dance. His shadows would dance around you and their master, as you swayed together in silence, letting the bond serve as music for your souls.

The first night he did this, you wordlessly pulled him to your bedroom, pulling off his shirt and resting in bed with your head against his chest, his heartbeat lulling you into a sleep that was idled with dreams of him. And since that night, you spent nearly every night together. It had become a habit at this point. One that you didn’t want to break. One that you didn’t need to break. Because time and time again, these past couple of months, Azriel had spent every moment with you trying to prove his love to you. Trying to prove his devotion to you. Trying to prove his adoration for you. He would woo and charm you with his thoughtful gestures; walking you to and from work, dancing the night away with you, flying you over the sidra with his powerful wings so you could experience the night air tangle your hair, annotating the stories he read just for you, cooking dinner with you, whispering sweet nothings into your ear as you cuddled close to him, shifting his wings to wrap around you during the night so you wouldn’t feel the chill of the night. It was all so perfect. He was so perfect. And it was working.

You had fallen for the male years ago, and you found yourself falling all over again. Every day and night spent with Azriel was another minute, another second of you falling for him.

The silent peace was broken by the shadowsinger groaning into your hair, “Rhys wants us to join everyone for breakfast at River House,” no doubt the high lord had snuck beyond his mental shields to coax you both to the house of wind. He threw his muscled thigh over your legs, rolling you onto your back and trapping you beneath him. You were nearly breathless with his beauty, the morning chill had produced a small flush on his cheeks that wouldn’t have been visible if you weren’t so close to the male. Apparently he had noticed your gaping, smirking down at you and leaning down to press a gentle kiss onto the tip of your nose. You stared up, contemplating, trying to find the will to leave Azriel’s warmth to get dressed out of your pajamas and into something socially acceptable. You were coming up empty, scrunching your nose as the shadowsinger had moved to pressing kisses all over your face, “Maybe we should just skip it, Az, we can just stay in bed for the rest of the day and sleep,” your hand coming up to run your fingers through his silky ink hair in a small gesture to convince him.

“Don’t do this to me Dove,” nudging his nose against yours, “If we don’t get out of bed now, I don’t think we ever will,” the rasp in his morning voice had the hair on your arms standing at attention.

You leaned up, ready to brush your lips against his soft ones, blushing at the sense of giddiness that came with being around Azriel, that came with his charming advances towards you. Maybe you would keep him in bed with you forever, what could possibly be more pleasant than this?

“You better be on your way with your lovebird,” Rhysand purred into your mind, interrupting your moment of intimacy with a gasp, you managed to bonk your head into Az’s nose by the shock before slamming up your mental shields. He was knocked backwards slightly, grip on you loosening as apologies immediately began to spill from your lips. The flush that had marked your cheeks initially from the closeness of your mate had deepened and spread to your neck and ears in embarrassment, “Oh gods, Azriel, I am so sorry,” your hands reaching up to rub at his nose he was clutching, desperately pulling at his fingers to see if any blood was coming out. “It’s fine dove, I’m fine,” his shoulders shaking with laughter as he allowed you to press at his nose, hazel eyes stared down at you with mirth looking completely smitten and endeared by your worry shifted to something more subdued, “I didn’t do something to make you uncomfortable right?”

Your heart jumped at his question. Your conversations continued the night you had found out you were mates, sifting through different concerns you had, including discussions of boundaries you had wanted to set as you took the time to process your new relationship. As you took the time to process his side of the story, his apologies, his want for something more with you. You wanted space from him, you wanted to give yourself the time to grieve the period you had lost with him, including under the mountain, including the months prior. And he had respected that fully while making sure to still put in the effort of building towards something more. Each step you took, you took together in navigating the huge change that had come with Az being your mate.

The spymaster, true to his nature, had been patient with you. Answering every single question you had with complete honesty, with no excuse, only an explanation and a promise to be better. There were still some things that weighed heavily on you, things that still upset you, and you weren’t ready to accept the bond yet without discussing those things, without working through those things. But when you were ready, whenever that moment would come, you knew that Azriel wouldn’t push you away, he wouldn’t excuse his behavior that he had apologized for time and time again, behavior that he had acknowledged and assured you was wrong on his part. Throughout this entire process of rebuilding your relationship with the male from where you had left off, Azriel had only validated you. He had ensured that every step forward in your relationship had been something you were comfortable with, and you knew that he feared violating any of the boundaries you had laid down.

“No Az, it was Rhys, he was calling on his to join everyone and I guess he just surprised me,” you murmured, smiling softly at the male to reassure him that he had been within his limits, the tips of your fingers danced over his nose, using bits of your healing magic to soothe any ache that would form later in the day from the sudden pressure. He only hummed, wings flaring at the sensation of your touch, spanning across the length of your bed. When you decided you were content with your healing, the shadowsinger moved to kiss the tips of your fingers before lifting himself off you, pulling you up with him, “Come my dove, don’t want Rhys to rip our heads off for being too late.”

You had dressed yourself into a navy blue dress that had extended to your ankles, cinching at the waist and flowing over your hips while Az had dressed into his leathers that had been strewn across your hardwood floors quickly, allowing for him to fly you to River House. It would be the first time since Starfall that you would be seeing everyone all together, much to Rhys’ chagrin, and part of that brought slight anxiety at seeing the one person you had been avoiding since the start of this all, slight anxiety at seeing Az interact with her. You tried to push it out of your mind, mindful of taking a couple of deep breaths, as you entered the sunroom that Rhys had opted to have breakfast in this morning. The clouds had cleared up, and the rays of warm sun heated the room into a comfortable temperature.

You stiffened when you noticed the pointed look Morr was sending you, the only two empty seats that had remained was one to Elain’s left and one directly in front of that chair next to Cassian. You tried to suppress the grimace that you knew had probably already flashed across your face, pointedly ignoring Azriel, who had turned to watch you, as you made your way towards the seat open next to Cass. You cleared your throat, rasping out a greeting before taking a couple of sips from the full champagne glass. Azriel moved to his seat next to Elain, though his eyes remained trained on you, murmuring out his own greeting to the table. You carefully avoided eye contact with him, putting up a small wall around the bond, annoyed that you had once again found yourself in a position of discomfort, despite Az not being the one to blame. It is not like he had known this would’ve happened, nor did he make the move to sit next to her until you had already placed yourself next to Cass, leaving the only bare seat next to her. Discomfort and apprehension snaked through you as you recalled the events of Starfall, eerily mimicking today’s set up, pushing it to the back of your mind as Rhys waved at everyone to begin their meal.

You had stayed quiet for the most part of the meal, stirring in the flashbacks of the argument you had with Az during Starfall leaving a lump in your throat. You only responded to Cassian's teasing, trying to muster up your own smirk and fiery response like usual, but came up short every time he tried engaging you. Azriel had taken to observing you, his shadows swirled around your wrist, trying to grab at your attention, but you weren’t in the mood to have the discussion you so desperately had put off until now in front of the inner circle.

The conversation about Elain had been one you had with Azriel a couple of different times, but usually at a surface level, the pain still feeling too raw to discuss in depth. Everytime the shadowsinger tried to explore further your concerns, knowing this had been a huge point of contention in your relationship with the male, you sheepishly redirected the conversation to other topics. And graciously, your mate had let you. It wasn’t that you still feared he would leave you or ignore you again, that much had been made clear by his efforts these past couple of months in rebuilding the relationship you once had, and furthering it. But… but it still hurt. You had felt… you had felt abandoned by him. Like… like you had meant nothing. Like the years of friendship had meant nothing. And every time you thought about it, a sharp pain would course through your body and would settle in your chest.

And you knew he hadn’t meant to make you feel that way. That he was trying his best to make something good out of a poor situation. That he was struggling with his own feelings, that he was struggling with accepting the fact he had “failed” his mate in his own words. You knew that he had tried his best with Elain, maybe because he wasn’t able to help you the way he wanted, despite the endless support he gave you after under the mountain.

But he had made you feel that way. And it was a difficult feeling to look past, to get over. And maybe… maybe you didn’t want to get over it. As wrong as it sounds, part of you had this pain to cling to. And maybe you were afraid the pain would never go away… and maybe that is why you couldn’t bring yourself to let go. Because if you did let go, let Azriel explain, let Azriel attempt to make it better, to give Azriel the chance to be better, and the pain stayed?

Well, you weren’t sure if you could live with that.

Az nudged his foot against yours, interlocking your leg between his, and you finally allowed yourself to give into the urge to glance at him. His hazel eyes stared back at you in concern and distress, probably feeling the wall that you had built up around the bond as he attempted to contact you, to reach out to you, to reassure you that he was here with you, and as you attempted to smile back at him through the lump in your throat, you couldn’t help but think that maybe it was time to confront these feelings head on. Confront Azriel head on. Because he wasn’t blameless, and he shouldn’t be treated as such. Because he had taken responsibility, and you knew he would continue to take responsibility. Because he was being better.

Because he was trying.

And maybe, you could try too.

You self regulated for the rest of the meal through deep breathing techniques Nesta had been ingrained into your training, “I am the rock against which the surf crashes,” in and out, in and out. Az’s shadows twirled through your hair, leaving cool carrases against your neck, one source of reassurance, and the other being that the shadowsinger had hardly acknowledged Elain as she awkwardly glanced at the two of you back and forth. You quietly thanked Feyre and Rhys for the meal, creating a mental note to explain to the high lord and lady everything that had happened in the past couple of months later, knowing that they were missing your presence, missing Az’s presence. You stood with your hand held out to Az to grasp onto, promptly winnowing you both back to your apartment.

In and out. In and out. In and out.

You wordlessly dragged Azriel into the living room, sitting down on the carpeted floor, facing the window that overlooked the sidra. When he had settled next to you, he wrapped an arm around you, squeezing at your shoulder before rubbing his scarred hand up and down, “Are you okay?”

You screwed your eyes shut as tears began to line the corner of your eyes, the lump in your throat tightening so hard, it made it almost impossible to breathe. In and out. In and out. “I am the rock against which the surf crashes,” again and again and again. You tried to hold yourself back. Tried to hold in your tears. You hadn’t cried in front of Az in a while… his efforts… they hadn’t gone unnoticed by you. In fact, you had taken his efforts in stride, using them as a means to sweep your feelings under the rug despite his constant reminders that he didn’t want you to do that. That he wanted to talk to you about anything and everything. That he wanted to apologize and make it up to you. That he loved you. That he would spend the rest of his lifetime proving it to you, every day, every minute, and every second.

One of his wings came around your form, wrapping you up in his radiating warmth, and you relaxed into his side, silently observing the way the rays of sun peeked through the thin membrane as the feeling of holding back became almost unbearable. “Dove?”

Your body shook as you snuffled, hot tears streaming down your cheeks, collecting at the tip of your chin and spilling onto the point between your collarbones. “The moments we used to share. Before Elain? The ones that were intimate. That were supposed to be between us. You shared with her, and it kills me. It kills me that you did what you did Az. I don’t know how to forgive you. I don’t know if I can. If I ever will. Because I-... because in that moment Az, I wanted to hate you for it. And gods, I hated her for it,” you felt it. All of it. All the pain that had been building. The pain that you hadn’t acknowledged. The pain you had avoided. The pain Azriel had wanted to address, but anytime he would try, you would shut him out. And all that pain… it had built into a rage. A painful, aching, heartbreaking rage. “How? How could you do that to me? I mean- did you even miss me? When you were with her, being her friend. When I needed you. When you ignored me. Did you miss me? Did you even care that you were hurting me? You were such an asshole. You were such a fucking asshole on Starfall. Your words still fucking haunt me. They haunt me in my fucking dreams.”

It came out in hard sobs, each word interrupted by a shudder of your body. At some point during your speech, you had yanked his arm off of you, pushing away to face him as you let the angry words spill out like a river flowing into an open lake. His wing once wrapped around you was pulled tightly against his back, and the sun that had once been soaking it in warmth had disappeared behind clouds as rain began pouring outside. And with each word, each shudder, each tear, each sob, you could see Azriel’s heart shatter into pieces before you as his hazel eyes stared back in anguish, his own tears flooding into his eyes, not interrupting you, not moving to hold you knowing you would likely push him away, letting you let all your anger and pain and hurt out. Taking the brunt of it head on. Because… because if this is what you needed to feel better, then he would always take the brunt of it head on for you. Because if hating him is what you needed, then he would let you hate him, even if it tore him to pieces.

“ ‘I think your fucking jealous of Elain. Jealous that she is getting the attention that you want… That is so fucked up of you… So stop with this utter bullshit of whatever pity party you are having…’ Those were the exact fucking words you used Azriel, how could I ever, ever forget that? And yes. Yes, I was fucking jealous. And I get it, she went through something traumatizing. And you were trying to be there for her. But that didn’t mean you had to shut me out. You- you were supposed to always be there Azriel. You were my best friend. And you… you abandoned me. You told me my feelings were fucked up. That I needed to get over my bullshit pity party? And the entire time, you knew we were mates and you didn’t tell me. Do you not see how utterly fucked up that is? Like you quite literally broke my heart. I couldn’t get out of bed for days after. I mean… did you not tell me because you- did you not want me?” The next words had bile rising to your throat, your deepest insecurities being exposed to Azriel in this moment, your entire being became small as you whispered the next words, flicking your eyes that were clouded with tears back and forth to gaze into his, “Did you… did you want her instead?”

And there it was.

Right there.

Everything that you had held back for the better part of the three months you had known he belonged to you, everything you had held back since Starfall. Months upon months of insecurity. Months of anguish over the love of your life who had caused you this pain. But you wanted to- no you needed to know what he was thinking. Because even if he was drunk that night, even if he said those words in anger… they were unacceptable. And you would not stand for it. And he needed to know that. He needed to know that if you ever moved forward… you would never ever let him speak to you that way again. Because you and him both know that you deserve better than that.

“No.” Resounding. Definite. Said like an indisputable fact.

Azriel’s shadows had disappeared the moment you started rambling, deserting their master for what was probably the first time in the shadowsinger’s life since they became servant to him. His eyes were tinged red, blinking to force his tears away. He took a deep breath, wings tucked in so close, it looked painfully tight. His lips were pressed together, holding his open palms out to you, praying to the mother and all the gods above that you would reach out and hold them. And his prayers were answered.

Even in this moment of anger and rage and unbearable pain, you reached out to him. Letting your mate ground you. His eyebrows furrowed, his face mirroring his earnesty, “I did not want Elain. Nor will I ever want her. Her beauty is undeniable,” your heart seized as it dropped into your stomach, you nearly snatched your hands away but he didn’t let you, interlocking his fingers with yours, thumb grazing your knuckles, “But it will never, ever compare to yours. And I am sorry. So so so fucking sorry, that I ever made you feel like it did. I offered her my friendship, and absolutely nothing more, my love. Because my heart. My soul. My entire being. It all belongs to you. It always has, since the moment I met you.” He reached up speaking with such fervor, brushing your hair back behind your ear as he thumbed at your tears, stroking your cheek, never breaking eye contact once, “I want to start by saying I never meant for it to seem as though I wanted her, but I know now how my actions lead you to feel that way. I will never, ever forgive myself for how I have made you feel, my love. I will spend the rest of my life apologizing and trying to make it up to you. And I am so fucking thankful, so fucking thankful, that you opened up to me. That you told me how you felt then and how you feel now. Because we haven’t been able to move forward, and now I understand why. I know why. And you don’t have to forgive me my dove. You don’t. What I did was inexcusable. It is unforgivable. I can only pray to the mother above, to the gods, and the cauldron that one day, you will find it in you to forgive me. And even if you don’t, that is okay because I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I- I stupidly thought I was doing the right thing. I thought at the time that I was doing the right thing in distancing myself from you, but I realize now, I recognize now that it was my own selfish need that caused me to distance myself from you.” You sniffed, not sure you fully were understanding what he meant. And he…

He huffed, turning his face to hide it against his shoulder, “Gods, I- I didn’t know how to be around you anymore. All I wanted to do was pull you into my arms and claim you as my mate. And I didn’t think you were ready. I knew that you hadn’t fully recovered from under the mountain, from the war. And I didn’t want to hurt you anymore by changing the friendship, the relationship we had. Because it seemed like you were content with it. And honestly? I was scared. I was so fucking scared that you wouldn’t want me, and I was scared that if I did tell you, I would lose you and your friendship. And I was worried about how you would deal with the loss of our friendship. And now? Now I scoff at my own stupidity. My own failure.” His jaw clenched so hard, you could hear the grit of his teeth as he ground down. He reached his hands up to rest against your neck as he pulled you in, resting his forehead against yours, focusing his hazel iris’ into yours, staring deeply, intently.

“Y/N, my love, my light, my mate… of course I missed you. I fucking ached for you. I still fucking ache for you. I have missed you since you went under the mountain, I have missed you since you came back, I have missed you since the war, I have missed you since Starfall and every day since. Anytime spent away from you is agony that I can’t help but think I deserve. Agony that I brought on by my own actions. And yes, I was an asshole. Starfall… it was one of the worst nights of my existence beyond the five decades of you being trapped by Amarantha. I… I said some horrific things to you. I was drunk, and I was angry at myself for pushing you away, and I was terribly jealous that you had spent the evening with Lucien. It is no excuse. I could feel it… your anger… your pain… I didn’t know what to do with it. Because yet again, I had failed you. Failed in protecting you. Failed in making you content, in making you happy. And the fury I felt was supposed to be direct at me. I hated myself, deeply, in that moment. And it fucking- it ravaged everything around me including you. Those words I said… I wish I could take them back. I wish I could turn back the clock, and go back to that balcony, and pull you close and hold you, and promise you to never hurt you again. I wish I could do that, but I can’t. Words… words like that, they can’t be taken back. They are something that I have to live with. But you… you have the option of choosing, dove. You have the option of choosing to live with them, of choosing me and all my mistakes that I have made in the past and will make in the future with the knowledge that I will spend my existence trying to make the love I give you outshine those mistakes, or– or you could… you could choose to let my mistakes pull you away from me, let my mistakes be the reason you… you reject me. And gods, I wouldn’t blame you if you did. Because I have made a lot of mistakes when it comes to you, my love. And I will probably make some more. All I can do is promise you myself. Promise you that I will live for you. Live to make you happy. Live to make you safe and protected. And Gods, even if you do choose to reject me, I will still make these promises to you. Because it wouldn’t change how I feel about you. Not one bit. I was supposed to be your best friend. And yes, I broke your heart. But I never abandoned you. Not once. I would check on you. Every night. I would check on you after you had fallen asleep. I would stand out on that balcony for hours, ensuring that you were resting well. I warded off your apartment from danger… I had Helion show me a couple of spells, and it was fucking hard but I did it. Because I needed you safe. And my shadows would sneak under the door and check the kitchen to ensure dirty dishes were present in the sink so I could know you had eaten that day. I would read books and annotate them, thinking about you, saving them for the next time I would see you finished with your own. I- I know I should've been more present. I should’ve been more courageous. I should have told you the day I found out we were mates. And I am sorry, so fucking sorry I didn’t. And I know this isn’t the last conversation we will have about this, nor do I intend to let it be. I want you to feel secure in our relationship moving forward. I want you to know there will never ever be anyone else in my life besides you. Even if you don’t want me anymore. I will give you some time to think on it. I would wait an eternity for even a taste of the sweetness of your love. And I will keep trying, every day, to show you how much I love you. Okay?”

He was nearly out of breath by the time he had finished speaking, sucking in your exhales for reprieve, baring out his soul to you. Yes. He had made mistakes. He is not a perfect male. And he never will be a perfect male, and it is not right to expect him to be. Because at the end of the day, everyone makes mistakes. And he was leaving it up to you. He was giving you the option. Wording it so beautifully, so truthfully, letting you know that either way, whatever you chose, he would always be there to put his life on the line for your happiness, even if that happiness was without him. Your heart had skipped a couple of beats, knowing that Azriel hadn’t forgotten you. That he had come by, even if you were asleep and unknowing. That he had looked after you to make sure you were getting better, that he had learned incredibly difficult warding spells by Helion just to protect you. Even while he was making mistakes, bouts of his love would shine through the darkness surrounding you. And he was giving you time… time to decide what you wanted out of your relationship. If you could find the strength to forgive him, to move on, to never forget his mistakes and hold him accountable, but to let his love be the center of his decision making, let his love be the dominating thing you clung to instead of fear. “Okay, Az,” closing your eyes, relishing the feeling of his chapped lips brushing on your forehead in silent thanks.

Taglist: @paasrin @positivewitch @fieldofdaisiies @judig92 @sv0430 @highlady-ofillyria @wrensical003 @brekkershadowsinger @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @mrs-azriel @cityofidek @nova-stardragon @thewarriormoon @ilovespideyyy @azzydaddy @bookish-dream @nobody00sthings @marigold-morelli @solossweater @rubygirly @hanasakr @ellievickstar @shadowcrossworld @lucyysthings @cameronsails @peachycandy10 @bruhhv @flyingsquids @adreamerforthestars @lahoete @mis-lil-red @his-sweet-nightmare @esposadomd @blurredlamplight @elizarikaallen @tiffthebookworm @valeridarkness @wifeofcamillamacaulay @everyonehatescarmen @azriels-favorite-simp @goldentournesol @marina468 @elsie-bells @slvtherinseeker @cafe-inaaa @honeyrydernot @itsonlymemyself-and-i @nemesis6666 @thegirlintheshadows101-blog @kennedy-brooke

#azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel x y/n #azriel shadowsinger #azriel spymaster #azriel acotar #azriel fanfic #cassian acotar #nesta acotar #feyre acotar #rhysand acotar #fluff #angst #always #acotar #acotar fanfic #acotar fandom #azriel fluff #azriel angst

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queen-mihai · 1 year ago

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Ok I'm developing a theory.

Let me say this first: I don't care if it's true or not. I think it's fun and I'm going to choose to believe it's true even if the writers literally come out and say it's not. It's that good.

Valerie is V

In the movie "V for Vendetta", V is explicitly never identified. We obviously see that he is a man. He has heightened basic kinesthesia, awareness, strength, and reflexes. He's got a deep voice, is reasonably tall, and thin.

Those are all things we know.

He never takes off the mask in any way we can see. If the hair is a wig, it's DAMN solid on his head, and he's got severe burns over so much of his body that he no longer has eyes.

"He looked at me, but not with eyes, there were no eyes"

Now for some evidence:

V is very obviously a thespian. Sure, we could assume the "man" was one as well, but we actually have backstory behind Valerie that would perfectly set her up with the type of knowledge V seems to have in the arts. Especially when she says "I'd always known what I wanted to do with my life"

When Valerie is taken, she already has the same look on her face as Evey has when she said "I'd rather die behind the chemical sheds"

V is very in tune with emotions. Obviously men can be in tune with their emotions. But Hollywood generally plays to a low common denominator. Why include this personality detail when all he needs to do is kick butt? If we are doing stereotypes 👇 this scene plays fairly heavily against the "male" stereotype when V perfectly times the moment where it will be okay to reach for Evey, let alone knowing when it's okay to touch her

Valerie falls in love fast. That's practically a personality trait we're shown in the story. With Sarah "it was her wrists". With Ruth, "the first time we kissed, I knew I never wanted to kiss any lips but hers again. This matters because when V says "I fell in love with you Evie" He mentions that he had thought of nothing but revenge until he saw her. That sounds an awful lot like something Valerie would do IMO

"This is the most important moment of your life, commit to it" spoken like someone who has lived that *exact* experience to the letter. You might think if he was a man when this happened to him, his experience might have looked *a little* different. If it was Valerie, though, it would make sense that she knows exactly when everything is falling into place because that's when it happened for her.

The anger she had over Ruth being taken fits V's actions far more closely than anything we get from our mystery man. Yes, he was tortured, but so was everyone else.

Writers love these kind of Easter eggs. Come on, room V, Valerie, V,...geezus "V" could have been the nickname she got from Ruth when they were together.

"I fell in love with you Evey. Like I never thought I could anymore" fits SO much better if Valerie just didn't know she could love again after Ruth was gone. That hits SO much harder if she's a woman from whom love was taken away and who went on a murderous revenge spree.

This was written by the Wachowski sisters. They would know what transitioning does to a person. If the "virus" was some sort of super-soldier serum, we could assume that some part of that serum might have included heavy doses of testosterone, which would have deepened her voice, even down to the level we hear in the movie.

If V was forcefully transitioned, it would stand to reason he'd want to hide his face (her face?) And would say things like "There is a face behind this mask, but it is not me"

Valerie might well have known how to create masks and such

The damn Scarlett Carson roses! They make SO MUCH more sense when you consider Valerie would have already known how to take care of them before she got taken, (and maybe even knew where to find a stash of seeds?) rather than some guy randomly found out about them and then learned how to keep them

If she indeed got cast for major motion pictures, and gotten paid well for them, that might explain the VAST resources V has at his disposal in order to pull off his schemes

👇 This right here👇

Soooo many similarities

"I had only told them the truth"

"I told you, only truth"

There's so many scenes that VERY MUCH make V look feminine

Ugh, there's so much more

There's SO MUCH MORE

But I'm dead tired right now and I want to post this now while I'm still excited about it and I'll have to write an update about it later if people want to hear more.

Heck... one very personal but deeply powerful concept about this movie for me is that I have shaped some parts of my personality around V's character. His intelligence. His ability to be both a monster and a face of kindness, his love for the arts and passion in keeping up his skills. I was surprised as heck when I found out his favorite movie is "The Count of Monte Cristo" because before I found "V for Vendetta", that was already MY favorite movie (the 2002 version though)

I don't see there being any fewer similarities after transitioning and I found this movie LONG before I thought any part of me was feminine

If MatPat ends up stealing this idea for a video, my name on here (Ce'irth) is pronounced like "surf"

OK see you later

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c-a-cupid666 · 8 months ago

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pinned post my name is Valerie Valentine. plz do not call me Val it sounds like that p1mp from h@zb1n :/. pretty friendly I think :) . i like monster high, hello kitty, mlp, bright colors, mythology, FASHION AND BEAUTY!!!!, cats, Nintendo stuff, south park, art, sparkly stuff, flashing lights (obsessed with blinkers right now), and 2000s stuff. :D . actually npd and autistic and adhd and possible hpd. I collect blinkers :) tags on my blog #Valerie likes: Stuff I like :) - #valerie loves <3: pretty people... #pd stuff: pd stuff! - #moot: my Mutuals - #fandom: fandom stuff - #valerie has spoken - me talking i also have the standard tw tags and I have a lot of flashing lights on my blog so if ur photosensitive be careful. as well as I reblog sometimes stuff that could be suggestive but never full nsfw lol just pretty people.

alt text in notes

#trans #fandom #fashion #pink #purple #blinkers #tw flashing #tw flickering #monster high #makeup

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tiny-wooden-robot-fics · 6 months ago

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Voyager - Seven

Rating: Explicit Pairing: Oda Nobunaga (Ikemen Sengoku) x Original Female Character Characters: Oda Nobunaga (Ikemen Sengoku), Eri Davidson (Original Female Character of Color) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Grief/Mourning, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Slow Burn, Flirting (so much flirting), Teasing, Oda Nobunaga is a huge flirt and a huge tease, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pregnancy, Pregnant Sex, Slight Timeskip Near the End

Previous Chapter (Six): No Easy Conquest | Next Chapter (Eight): A Familiar Face

Chapter Masterlist

Summary:

"Valerie, you should know that I never say anything I don't mean."

She glares at him.

"Calm yourself," he laughs. "It isn't as if I've never seen a naked woman before."

Read on AO3

“You did well today.” The Lord of Azuchi says the words as he helps her dismount from the pretty chestnut mare she’d chosen for her riding lessons. “How do you feel, having completed your first lesson?”

“Like I’m going to be really sore tomorrow morning,” Eri laments. “I can already feel the tightness in my legs.”

“A soak in the baths tonight will ease the soreness,” he tells her, leading the horse back to the stable to brush and feed it.

“Baths?” Eri raises an eyebrow, unsure if she’s heard him correctly.

“Mm.” He grunts in response, his attention focused on the horse.

“Wait… you did say ‘baths’, right?” She shakes her head. “As in, baths?”

He looks up at her. “I didn’t think there was anything unclear in what I said.”

She squeezes her eyes shut tightly. “You mean to tell me,” she starts, “that there have been baths at Azuchi all this time?”

This seems to amuse him. “They were there before you arrived, and they will be there after you leave.”

Exasperated, she clicks her tongue. “No one told me!”

“I just did,” he replies simply.

“Where are they?”

“Not far from here.” He motions vaguely toward the area behind her. At Eri’s blank look, he sighs. “Help me feed her,” he starts, motioning to the horse, “and I’ll show you where they are.”

***

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” She murmurs the words, her eyes taking in the sight in front of her. She turns to him, incredulous. “I can’t believe this has been here the whole time, and I’ve been wasting away in my room wishing for a hot bath where I could soak.”

“Why did you never ask?”

Because I’m a moron. Eri shakes her head. The maids must think I’m a nutcase. “Because I just… I guess I just didn’t think to,” she admits. “No one ever offered me anything different, so I didn’t know another option existed.”

He cocks his head to the side curiously, studying her. “Surely they have baths where you’re from.”

“Actually---” She stops herself. “You know what? It doesn’t even matter.” She shakes her head again. “So it’s alright for me to use this tonight?”

“As much as you like.”

“I get to wash my hair,” she croons happily.

“Is that a special event?”

This makes her laugh. “You have no idea.”

“Well then,” he says thoughtfully, flashing her a smile. “Perhaps I shall come by tonight and observe this special event for myself.”

Is he… serious? Before she has time to contemplate it further, he has turned on his heel and is walking away from her.

***

“Lady Eri,” Haru calls from the other side of the shoji. “I am here.”

“Oh, Haru,” Eri calls back, as she gathers her clothing into a bundle. “Come on in.”

“I’m sorry for the delay,” Haru apologizes, bowing low as she closes the shoji behind her.

Eri waves a hand. “No, it’s alright. I just wanted to see if I could get your help with something.”

“Anything,” the young lady smiles. “I’m here to serve you, My Lady.”

I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that, she thinks, shaking her head. “Tomorrow morning, before tea with Yasuke-San and his family, I’d like to go into town to buy a few things. I’ve already spoken to Ishida-San, and he’s given me a list of places I might find what I need and the money with which to buy them. Would you be available to go with me?”

“Of course,” Haru beams at her. “I’m so glad you asked. There’s a new vendor I heard about who has the loveliest hair pins. I’d like to go see for myself, if we have time.”

“I think we can arrange that,” Eri smiles. “I’ll send for you mid-morning, if that’s alright.”

“As you wish, My Lady.” She bows once more before leaving the room, and Eri turns her attention back to gathering the clothing she needs for her trip to the baths.

***

If there is a more luxurious feeling than the one she is experiencing now, Eri has yet to find it.

She sighs in contentment as she lowers herself into the steaming water. The baths at Azuchi are laid out much like the more modern ones that she has seen occasionally during her time in Japan, and she is grateful that just like those modern baths, there is an area for her to clean her body and hair before soaking in the steaming hot water of the large bath. She has purposely waited until late in the evening, when most of the estate’s residents have retired for the night. Her patience has served her well, as the baths are deserted by the time she gets there.

I haven’t felt this clean in days, she thinks to herself languidly, watching the steam rise over the surface of the water. She submerges her head, re-wetting her hair before reaching up to grab her comb and oils. She has just started working the camellia oil through the first section of her hair when she hears his voice.

“It appears I have arrived too late to witness the beginning of your special event.”

Eri lets out a yelp, dropping the comb in her hand onto the stone lip of the bath. Frantically, she reaches for her robe, but realizes that she is too far away from it to retrieve it without coming part of the way out of the water. “You--!” She gasps, letting herself sink deeper into the water and trying to cover her breasts with her arms. “What are you doing here?”

The Lord of the castle gazes at her, genuine confusion in his features. “I did tell you that I wanted to witness it for myself,” he says logically, as though he hasn’t just scared her nearly to death. “Did I not?”

“I didn’t think you meant it!” She’s still curling away from him, mortified, trying to hide the private bits of her body.

“Valerie, you should know that I never say anything I don’t mean.”

She glares at him.

“Calm yourself,” he laughs. “It isn’t as if I’ve never seen a naked woman before.”

She sputters, trying to come up with a snappy retort and finding she is utterly unable to. It becomes even harder to speak once he removes his own robe and Eri realizes that he intends to join her in the bath. “Oda-Sama---!” She averts her eyes, her face burning.

“I think,” he starts, “that in such a casual setting as this one, it would be appropriate to use my given name. Don’t you agree?” He submerges himself completely, moving to the other side of the bath. “Please,” he continues, motioning to the abandoned comb and oils, “don’t let me stop you.”

Stubbornly, she keeps her arms crossed over her chest.

“Would it make you feel more comfortable if I looked the other way?”

“Do whatever you want,” she snaps, refusing to look at him.

“I told you, it isn’t as if I’ve never seen a naked woman before.”

“You’ve never seen me naked before.” And I was hoping to keep it that way.

“One could argue that I still haven’t,” he chuckles. “You’ve been keeping yourself covered, but even if you hadn’t, night has already fallen, and the darkness of the water covers what you don’t want me to see.”

She can’t refute that point. “Are you really that curious about what I do with my hair?”

“I really am,” he answers.

“It isn’t that interesting,” she rebuts.

“Perhaps not to you,” he shrugs, the water lapping at his collarbones. “But the things we find uninteresting because we do them often are the things that are most interesting to people who have never seen them done.” He offers her a smile. “I promise to keep my eyes above your neck.”

Eri sighs. She knows that if she doesn’t resume detangling and moisturizing her hair before it dries, she will have a tangled, shrunken mess on her hands very soon. “You give me your word?”

“You have my word,” he tells her solemnly, raising his right hand. “I would ask you for the same, but the truth is that I don’t really mind if your eyes wander.”

Son of a bitch. “My eyes won’t be wandering anywhere near you,” she snaps.

True to his word, however, he keeps his eyes on what her hands are doing in her hair, studying the way she parts the thick curls into sections and works oil through each section from root to tip. Even without her arsenal of modern styling and holding products, her hair takes well to the camellia oil, shining in the light of the lamps placed around the tub and curling into its natural z-pattern.

“It’s beautiful,” he muses, once she has finished doing the same all over her head.

Eyes wide, she looks over at him. “Thank you.”

“You seem surprised,” he remarks.

She shrugs, her arms instinctively crossing over her chest again.

“The mere fact that something is unfamiliar to me doesn’t make it any less worth admiring,” he reflects. “Do you think me so incapable of recognizing beauty in all its forms?”

Eri isn’t sure what to say to that. “Oda-Sama---”

“Nobunaga,” he interrupts her, laughter in his voice. “We’re naked in each others’ company. I think you can drop the formality.”

Her face goes warm. “Nobunaga,” she tries quietly, the name fitting strangely in her mouth.

“How sweet it sounds coming from you.” She can’t tell if he’s flirting or just teasing her.

“I’d like to get out now,” she tells him.

“I won’t stop you.”

She huffs indignantly. “Can I ask you to please look away?”

“If that’s what you want me to do,” he shrugs.

“Yes,” she tells him firmly. “I’m going inside to dress.”

“As you wish.” He turns away from her, and she scrambles up out of the water, snatching up her robe and wrapping it tightly over herself.

She takes her time drying and moisturizing her skin before dressing in her newly-cleaned modern clothing. She exits the bath house just as Nobunaga is pulling himself up out of the water, and a gasp escapes her.

“Oh, you’re finished,” he says conversationally, as if he isn’t standing in front of her stark-naked and dripping wet. “I’ll escort you back to your room.” He seems to realize then that he’s still naked and reaches down to pick up his robe and drape it over himself. “So your eyes did wander a bit,” he smirks.

“It isn’t as though I’ve never seen a naked man before.” She throws his words back in his face.

“But you’ve never seen me naked before. Did you see anything you liked?” He asks her, that teasing lilt back in his voice.

She ignores his question. “What do you think I am?”

“I think,” he starts seriously, holding out his arm for her to take, “that you are a mystery that I would like to solve.” He looks down at her, watching as she accepts his arm and loops her own through it.

***

“You know,” Valerie starts, looking past her reflection in the mirror to gaze at his, just behind her, “you’re being awfully distracting.”

“Me?” Shinichi chuckles. “I’m not even doing anything. I’m just watching.”

“Yes,” she says, “but it’s very hard to concentrate on what I’m doing when every time I look in the mirror, I see you lying there.”

“Would it help if I helped you?”

“Maybe,” she giggles. “It would help even more if you’d put some clothes on.”

“But I’m comfortable like this.”

“What you are, is a distraction,” she reiterates, wagging a finger at him playfully.

“Alright,” he says, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and standing up. “How about a compromise? I put on a pair of pants and help you.”

“That sounds like a fair deal.” She watches his reflection go into the third drawer of the bureau, pull out a pair of blue pajama bottoms, and slide them on. His reflection turns to her.

“Better?”

“For now.”

Her boyfriend closes the distance between them, bending over slightly to press a kiss to her lips. “Want me to get the back?” He asks, motioning to where her hair has been divided into two large sections.

“Yes, please,” she tells him gratefully.

They work together in a comfortable silence then, each tackling a section of her hair with moisturizer and a wide-toothed comb. More than once, Valerie stops moving, relishing the feel of Shinichi’s gentle hands working through her hair. Every now and again, he presses his fingertips to her scalp, softly massaging it and eliciting a pleased hum from her.

It isn’t long before her hair has been completely worked through, divided into large two-strand twists. Without her even having to say a word, Shinichi reaches over and grabs the length of satin she uses to tie her hair up at night. He hands it to her with a smile.

“Thank you,” she says, turning her face up for another kiss.

“You’re welcome,” he says, obliging her and pecking her on the lips. “So now that you’re done and the danger of distraction isn’t an issue anymore, is it okay for me to get naked again?”

“Well, I guess it’s alright now,” she giggles. “But I can’t promise I’ll be able to keep my hands to myself.”

“I honestly don’t expect you to.”

***

“Valerie?” Nobunaga is calling her name, concern lacing his deep, heavy voice.

“Oh, yes?” She looks up at him. “I’m sorry, you were saying something?”

“I was, but it was of little import.” He pauses, looking down at her curiously. “You seemed to go somewhere else for a bit.”

“It’s nothing,” she tells him, trying on what she hopes is a reassuring smile. “I was just… thinking about something from a long time ago.”

He looks as though he wants to ask her what, but thinks better of it and decides not to. “A mystery, indeed,” he says instead, almost as if to himself.

“Thank you,” she says quietly. “For walking me back.”

“Does this mean I have your permission to join you some other night?”

The question makes her laugh in spite of herself. “I promise to make less of a fuss if you warn me before you decide to show up,” she tells him sternly. “But you’ll have to keep your hands - and your eyes - to yourself.”

“Hm,” is all he’ll say.

Previous Chapter (Six): No Easy Conquest | Next Chapter (Eight): A Familiar Face

#tinywoodenrobot fics #black oc #ikemen sengoku #ikesen #ikesen nobunaga #oda nobunaga #oda nobunaga x oc #ikesen fanfiction

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