#using google translate i'm so sorry

[porcelain-clown]

The Kraven Problem

Penelope Parquette, aka the Araignée du Cirque, [the circus spider] is sent on a mission to retrieve a Kraven anomaly with Miguel O'Hara, her close friend and confidant. But when the anomaly bears a striking resemblance to the same Kraven who destroyed her old life, Penelope is thrown for a loop. A loop that is made worse when Kraven starts trying to flirt with her.

also on ao3! user nyxtryx 🫶🏻

trigger warning for death, fire animals dying, etc. this is super evil backstory for my spidersona.. have fun!

i'll update as i write, no promises lmaO

“A Kraven anomaly? Vous plaisantez j'espère?” [are you kidding me?] Penelope exclaimed as she thwipped alongside Miguel, shooting him an exasperated look. 

“Relax. Should be a pretty quick in-and-out.” Miguel grumbled, dismissively waving his hand before the pair settled behind a pile of rubble in Central Park, watching carefully as the Kraven anomaly rambled to nobody in particular about the state of the world with a thick transatlantic accent. He pulled a small, toothed comb out from seemingly nowhere, slicking back his Danny Zuko-esque hair with a flourish. 

“LYLA, what do we need to know?” Miguel spoke quietly, as to not disturb the prowling, large man. LYLA, chipper as ever, popped up, her glitching yellow screens displaying scrolling data about this Kraven. 

“Shouldn’t be any trouble, guys. He’s not even a successful villain in his own universe. Just web him up and toss him through a portal!” LYLA chirped, pushing her pink sunglasses up her nose with one hand as she used the other to swipe past multiple displays of video footage, showing Kraven sitting in the back of many, many cop cars. LYLA vanished, leaving Penelope and Miguel, crouched behind the rubble, to analyze and attack together. 

“You alright, clownie?” Miguel tilted his head, flicking at Penelope’s shoulder affectionately. She bristled slightly at the nickname, but seemed distracted, her overpainted clown makeup doing nothing to hide the anxiety in her eyes as she kept them trained on Kraven, refusing to look away. 

“Ce bâtard… looks just like him…” [that bastard] Penelope muttered under her breath. Miguel nodded slowly, realizing. 

[earth-0254. paris, france. many, many years ago.] 

“Ma précieuse araignée, nous devons partir! Les… animaux sont arrivés.” [my precious spider, we must go. the animals have arrived.] Guinevere, her long blonde hair, typically woven into the tightest, most perfect ballerina bun, now loose around her shoulders, falling across Penelope’s face as she sat up groggily in her sleeping quarters. The scent of smoke quickly filled her nose. She turned to the dreaded sight of the far lip of her tent curling into orange flame. 

“Guinevere? Est-ce que les chevaux sont en sécurité ? Où est Monsieur Jamesion?” [guinevere? are the horses safe? where is mr. jamesion?] Penelope blinked rapidly, her movements becoming increasingly frantic as she threw herself up and out of her nightclothes. 

“Je dois vérifier les chevaux. Monsieur Jamieson est avec le reste de notre troupe. Il n'y a que vous et moi qui sommes partis rassembler les animaux.” [i have to check on the horses. mr. jamieson is with the rest of our troupe. it's just you and me who are left to round up the animals.] Guinevere spoke, her crisp blue eyes darting around frantically. The tail end of her sentence was muffled, as the pair covered their mouths with the sleeves of their dresses to combat the growing plumes of smoke. 

As Penelope and Guinevere darted out from beneath their tent, they caught a glimpse of their attackers. There were 6 men, all but one wearing various taxidermied animals as masks. They were tall and menacing, each one covered in various furs, holding torches and laughing at the way the red and white striped fabric curled and went up in flames. The unmasked one turned, his eyes cutting into Penelope’s soul as he held eye contact with her for a searingly painful moment, which was ended by Guinevere sharply pulling Penelope’s arm. 

“Bouge-le, ma précieuse araignée. Nous n'avons pas longtemps.” [move it, my precious spider. we don't have long.] The intensity of Guinevere’s gaze caught Penelope off guard. She nodded, quickly trotting along. She almost swore she saw Guinevere dart a dirty look back to the sight of the men burning their tent, the unmasked man keeping his eyes on the two until they vanished from his sight. 

When Penelope and Guinevere approached the animal tent, they were too late. The left side of the tent was collapsing in on itself, thick plumes of black smoke and fireworks of angry red sparks rising as the fabric folded and wilted. Guinevere, who danced ballet on the backs of the horses, let out a strange, anguished cry. She threw herself towards the burning tent, opening a flap before Penelope could stop her. The pain-filled wails of the animals bled out from behind the tent flap, as did the horrific smell of them burning. Penelope gagged, the sight overwhelmingly grotesque. She threw her arms out, ripping Guinevere away from the tent, the flap settling back into place.

“Vous ne pouvez pas les sauvegarder. Il faut rejoindre les autres, c'est bien trop tard pour les animaux!” [you cannot save them. we have to join the others, it's far too late for the animals!] Penelope screamed over the howls of the burning animals, fighting to pull Guinevere back from the tent, desperately grabbing at her arms. Guinevere fought back, ripping herself out of Penelope’s grasp so sharply that the two tumbled onto the grass. Guinevere was faster, throwing herself up from where she lay, tangled with Penelope. 

Before Penelope could blink, Guinevere was gone, vanished behind the flap of the smoking, collapsing tent. Penelope’s heart lurched, a twisting feeling getting more intense in her stomach. She let out a strangled scream, tripping over her own feet as she stumbled beneath the tent flap.

The smell of smoke was suffocating, filling Penelope’s eyes with hot tears as she attempted to filter the smoke with her sleeve again, to no avail. She spotted Guinevere in the distance, untying one of her horses from his post, tears streaming down her face as she tried desperately to calm the braying, kicking animal down. 

“Guinevere!” Penelope cried out, her voice getting whipped away by the sounds the animals were making, the smoke filling her throat even faster. She choked for a moment before her spider senses activated and she turned quickly, dodging a blow from the unmasked man who had tried to sneak up behind her. 

Penelope dodged another blow. She gasped for air as she thwipped away from him, unable to tear her eyes away from his daunting figure, the smoke making any intense movement unbearably difficult. 

“Que veux-tu?” [what do you want?] Penelope cried out to the man. He grinned, showing off sharpened teeth. More animal than man, a predator. Penelope thought. 

“Je suis Kraven, le chasseur. vous connaissez ma troupe... les Chasseurs Voyageurs. mon maître de piste bien-aimé nous a demandé d'éliminer votre pathétique petite troupe. Moins il y a de concurrence sur le marché, mieux c'est.” [i am kraven, the hunter. you know my troop... the traveling huntsmen. my beloved ringmaster has asked us to eliminate your pathetic little troop. the less competition there is in the market, the better.] He shrugged at his last few statements, a smug movement that flared Penelope’s anger. With a cry, she threw herself towards him, landing a small barrage of punches, bruising his face only slightly before he quickly overpowered her, throwing her to the ground with one arm. She glowered up at him, his smug face smirking down as she rolled to desperately get away from the assault of harsh kicks and stomps he began aiming at her head. 

From her position on the ground, Penelope twisted her neck to see Gunievere, finally able to get her horse to calm down enough to untie, narrowly avoiding a flaming piece of tarp that came crashing down in front of the horse’s legs. Penelope screamed her name out again, her voice dying at the end of her throat from the smoke. Quickly, she jumped up, fighting Kraven with a refreshed purpose. She finally managed to get him on the ground, immobilizing him with her webs. 

But she was too late. Guinevere whirled in circles, searching for a way out, completely overwhelmed by the heat, the smoke, and the sound of her beloved animals screaming in excruciating pain. In her distracted, distressed state, her shoulder harshly caught a load-bearing wooden beam. Penelope ran over, seemingly in slow motion, as she watched the flaming beam splinter and collapse, a burst of red sparks and woodchips flurrying as the beam split, the flames growing larger as the beam sliced down onto Guinevere’s head. She collapsed with a shriek, the untied horse spooking and galloping off into the night. 

Penelope fell back, the flames from the beam catching quickly to the grass, spreading rapidly towards her. She turned, dashing out of the tent, too shocked to cry. Flashes of the pale blue crinoline that made up Gunievere’s tutu swirled in Penelope’s mind, her perfect posture as she grinned a row of pearls and turned on one extended, strong leg while a large horse galloped beneath her now a thing of the past, faded away and burned. 

[strugglingsapphic]

Chloe is a heater so she has to sleep in shorts ( they're baby blue ofc) and a tshirt a lot, and red is absolutely FERAL over her because in the mornings Chloe wakes up and her voice is deeper and she looks so boyfriend (Red explains that it's a tiktok thing, Chloe still doesn't get it but she takes the title with pride) And it takes Red all the power in the world to not jump chloe's bones right then and there because they have somewhere to be in an hour and she cannot make them late (again) but chloe is RIGHT THERE looking like THAT and she can't stop staring. So when the blue haired princess knows exactly what she's doing to Red, when she's leaning over and using her voice to her advantage whispering "Nous aurons le temps pour ça plus tard, cerise" in the girls ear and then has the audacity to chuckle at Reds little whine? Nah all bets are off, they'll make time NOW.

Chloe's absolutely melts when Red picks out one of her oversized shirts to sleep in (And only her shirt too, Red knows exactly how chloe likes it when the shirt is not only her baby blue color but her legs aren't covered either so Chloe's sure she's won the lottery), and Chloe has to fight tooth and nail to keep her eyes anywhere but her girlfriend when Red sits in her lap as she moves to get out of bed. And when the shirt pools at her hips (In the way she know drives her blue princess mad, and if she made sure the shirt rode up on purpose that's between her and god) Chloe can feel their difference in temperature when she puts her hands on Red's thighs, she can feel the shiver that goes through Red when she places her palms on her hips, she can feel the contrast of Reds cold lips on her feverish neck, she can feel Red's knees tighten when she whispers french into her ear and goddamnit-

She never had a chance of getting out of bed when she woke up this morning and fuck it she doesn't care anymore, Chad has dipped on Chloe so many times for Audrey that she thinks it's time to return the favor because if she doesn't pay attention to her girlfriend right now she might just die.

[lazyboy-baby]

Okay that’s a relief. I’ve honestly been curious of how your au differs from canon, since the designs are so much different and clearly sun isn’t afraid of eclipse and solar flare doesn’t hate him. So what happened in this au? How is it set up?

Funny thing, I kind of don't have a whole idea of how the story is going to proceed, but I know how it starts and ends, which is something.

The changes really start after Bloodmoon is rebuilt (by the way, this AU takes place in the same universe as this post I made a while ago).

The premise of the story is that Jigsaw found one of Eclipse's backups and built a body for him.

When he is finally placed in the new body. Surprise! He's not an ordinary backup, he's the original Eclipse, who still remembers everything before he died.

One more surprise is that Solar Flare is with him, they also don't know how they got there.

And after that it's a little confusing for me about how the story is going, but one thing I know where it's going is the relationships between each character. First of all, yes, there will be ships, especially with Eclipse.

And about Sun and Eclipse, I like to imagine that Sun discovered that Eclipse was alive after finding him in a horrible situation, where he is almost dead or having a breakdown, problaby having a breakdown, and they end up building their relationship from there, with Sun understanding Eclipse in a way that he never thought he could and Eclipse respects and understands Sun in a way he didn't even know he was capable of.

I think I rambled a little too much about this AU lol, here are some references of the designs and other things:

Eclipse, in the start and the ending (and shirtless):

Jigsaw, because it's such a silly boy:

Solar Flare, they're that one character i draw every time i want to see boobs:

Sun, big boy, i love him:

Jigsaw and Ruin are completely different entities in this AU, because I can't get rid of Jigsaw, it's really funny to me:

Also, Ruin x Solar, you guys infected me I swear:

And for reference, the height comparison between the gang:

[askblueandviolet]

Tú, alcalde. ¿Hablas español? Eso sería genial :D

"Yes, I know many languages! Mandarin, cantonese, english, brazilian, french, italian, and of course, spanish!"

MASTER POST

Asks Start 💙💜

Previous 💙💜

Next 💙💜

[fishysos]

Going down memory lane with OTPs Past.

Sorry for straight up drawing THE REAL GUYS, but Al Capone is so goddamn fine.. I had to.

[tastycitrus]

kinesis's entire thing is kind of hilarious to think about

first off, nexon intended for him to be, like, way more popular than he ended up being—they basically tried to design him to become more popular than phantom, the most popular character at the time, and he was advertised as being "your new favorite character." it didn't pan out because the class ended up not being liked on release in KMS

to go with this, kinesis was supposed to play a part in heroes of maple, hence why there's the segment where the heroes go to friends world to retrieve the transcendence abyssal stone, but since the reception to his class was so poor, they ended up writing him out of the story. i haven't played it, but apparently the maplestory m version of heroes of maple features his inclusion in the story that didn't make it into the original release where he uses his powers to prevent abraxas from crashing into seoul, and while the rewritten heroes of maple still doesn't include him, it does hint that kinesis was still involved in making sure abraxas landed "safely"

kinesis's storyline originally, explicitly took place after black heaven, hence why he doesn't have his own cutscene in act 2. the problem with this though is that the storyline has since established that black heaven is where the player character becomes the adversary via the seal stone being used to save their life, which is integral to the arcane river storyline and beyond, so technically it should be impossible for kinesis to be the adversary

even the premise is funny to think about. yeah you know the mushroom game where the setting is a fantasy world filled with magic and monsters? here's a class that comes from the high school AU we just introduced. and they proceed to just leave it like that, pretty much

[mel-loly]

-Happy Easter..💛

[evanwevand]

I hate having my whole family following me on Instagram cus now I can't post vents or they're going to worry about everything I draw and pretend to care for me GRRRRRRRRR

[ultra-violetra]

I made a discord server for qsmp fans to learn languages! It is a place to practice communicating with others without fear of judgement. If you're learning or want to learn one of the languages of the qsmp (english, spanish, portuguese, and french), this server is the place for you! It is somewhat barebones right now but I'm hoping to expand it in the future. Please dm or reply for the link to join! ¡Creé un servidor de discordia para que los fanáticos de qsmp aprendieran idiomas! Es un lugar para practicar la comunicación con los demás sin miedo a ser juzgados. Si estás aprendiendo o quieres aprender uno de los idiomas del qsmp (inglés, español, portugués y francés), ¡este servidor es el lugar para ti! Es algo básico en este momento, pero espero expandirlo en el futuro. ¡Por favor envía un mensaje privado o responde para obtener el enlace para unirte!

Fiz um servidor discord para fãs de qsmp aprenderem idiomas! É um lugar para praticar a comunicação com outras pessoas sem medo de julgamento. Se você está aprendendo ou quer aprender um dos idiomas do qsmp (inglês, espanhol, português e francês), este servidor é o lugar para você! É um pouco básico no momento, mas espero expandi-lo no futuro. Por favor, envie uma mensagem privada ou responda para obter o link para participar!

J'ai créé un serveur Discord pour que les fans de QSMP apprennent les langues ! C'est un endroit pour pratiquer la communication avec les autres sans crainte de jugement. Si vous apprenez ou souhaitez apprendre une des langues du qsmp (anglais, espagnol, portugais et français), ce serveur est fait pour vous ! C'est un peu rudimentaire pour le moment, mais j'espère l'étendre à l'avenir. Veuillez envoyer un message privé ou répondre pour obtenir le lien pour vous inscrire ! (tagging ppl who replied to my other post: @stellarumexp @qubitos @miamorroier @underlocker)

[joyridingmp3]

cancelled all future singing lessons 😌

[mioju0]

so I had this idea of ​​an au (maybe???)

well basically the idea is that ,after a time, narinder decides to leave the cult and live somewhere else, he's no longer a follower of the lamb and no longer affiliated with the old faith.

he'll live in some abandoned house in darkwood and live like a farmer, as long as the lamb continues to care for the growing cult and protecting it from heretics and remaining followers of the old faith.

the lamb has a chance to visit narinder's house during a crusade (only in darkwood of course), just have to be lucky enough to have it in the routes, or choosing a faster way via the cult's teleport. During a crusade, the lamb may take extra tarot cards (also pick up some food from the narinder's plantations).

narinder also visits the cult from time to time to share information about rituals/doctrines (just like ratau at the beginning of the game) or how the followers of the old faith have acted in their surroundings (he cares about lamb and he can't deny it).

[steelycunt]

Prynhawn da! Sut dych chi? Dw i'n wedi blino iawn. Dw i ddim eisiau gweithio heddiw

prynhawn da!! dw i'n da iawn diolch!! dw i'n...yfed te. a...gwneud bisgedi...

[dilfsuzanneyk]

i use all of my english knowledge for writing and then completely forget how to speak the language after

[asaichiban]

Asaichi: "I have successfully quit smoking ten times." Futsu: "Amaaazing" Kayoi: "Amazing ~ Icchan ~"

朝一：俺は禁煙10回くらい成功してる

ふつ：しゅご～い

かよい：しゅごいね～　いっちゃん〜

[hauntedhikingsociety]

bears in trees tape arrived. sadness and despair cancelled it's about to be so over

[mathmusicreading]

Xiè Lián: My surname is Xiè, my first name is Lián. Huā Chéng: You can call me your third husband. Xiè Lián: What happened to my first two husbands?!

I learned Huā Chéng was having Xiè Lián call him "husband" from Ty the Canasian on Kictor's YouTube, I found this when I was trying to corroborate the linguistics, and I indulged and bought the official Seven Seas Entertainment (translator and editor are on Tumblr!) English translations of the books so here's further confirmation from Volume 1:

ETA:

I made this post private because I was unhappy with it (misspelling/misformatting Wúmíng, knowing I wouldn't have good reach for larger and less biased sample size even if I could have tagged better for the fandoms and characters if Tumblr organized by more than the first five tags), but I'm making it public again since it finished and so did the similar poll that fun-mxtx-polls was kind enough to make for me.

Not to bias towards the first option, just to explain it, the first option and why I wanted this poll come from the naming pattern trivia for MXTX's love interests/male leads/gongs, which I think you can best read on Huā Chéng's page on the Heaven Official's Blessing/Tiān Guān Cì Fú wikia. I'm just using that as my citation given:

I'm not sure if MXTX has discussed this meta in-joke somewhere and if so, where.

The SSE Glossary: Terminology note (all volumes of all three MXTX novels) only explains the second and third gongs, and implies MXTX is doing this purposefully. Lán Wàngjī's wikia page explains only the three published gongs, and implies this started from fandom phenomena creating a proto-stage pattern (if you subscribe to "one is chance, two is coincidence, three is a pattern"). Huā Chéng's page linked above is the odd man out and so probably incorrect about Lán-èr-gē vs. Lán-èr-gēge, but it goes above and beyond by explaining the fourth gong, and it uses the most neutral language regarding this trivia.

I think citation is unnecessary for "gē" (哥 | 哥) meaning "big brother" and in certain contexts having the connotation or meaning of "eldest brother" (admittedly my unverified inference), "èr" (二 | 二) meaning "two", and "sān" (三 | 三) meaning "three".

I actually like so much because I like to think if it could use more wordplay and less literalism. Please forgive me for being a poor reader not remembering exactly, not buying the TGCF raws yet, not being able to buy the SVSSS and MDZS raws, and only being able to find old fan translations/interpretations of MXTX's fourth novel preview, but let me explain:

I believe Luò Bīnghé isn't being called "Luò Bīnghé-gē" (or rather "Bīng-gē" since I think? it's more usual to use the suffix with the single/first character of a person's given name, not with their full name, especially when the full name is three (or more? some of my reading has mentioned two-character last names but I didn't find if culture was strict about then making the given name be only one character) characters) for the usual reasons to address someone with "gē", but actually the PIDW!Luò Bīnghé is being called Luò Bīnggē (or "Bīng-gē") because he's more aggressive than canon/SVSSS!Luò Bīnggē who when being differentiated gets called Luò Bīngmèi (or "Bīng-mèi"), and I love that "very fitting reasoning for the naming, not strictly literal and not so bound to literal".

Then with Lán Wàngjī, I see the opportunity that his nickname could have used the natural naming of "erhua is used as a diminutive suffix", and the "er" would have been homophonous with "èr" (二 | 二) for "two" for him being the second gong, and homophonous to the potential "proper address for him as the second Lán son/brother".

In the most literal sense, you'll notice that the gongs so far have had their nicknames be using "(big) brother" and Huā Chéng's uses láng (郎 | 郎) "son" (his stated meaning, although it can also mean "man" and "husband" and the latter is how we can interpret he wanted it to be when coming from Xiè Lián). There's nothing wrong with that and the numbers are perfectly probable, and would still be so as they grow, but also they could feel more like "contrived" coincidence, which is part of my wanting to get away from literalism a little bit, not just my loving clever wordplay. With Huā Chéng, I don't have a homophone I can use for punning like with Lán Wàngjī, or really the "cultural language use where literal suffixes/honorifics get used figuratively for XYZ purposes", but I can make it fit with character interpretation. To me, Sān Láng doesn't have to be "Third Son" because "he has two older brothers" and in fact we aren't sure that he was telling the truth about that—instead, I think Huā Chéng could be being clever with not just getting Xiè Lián to call him (Third/surname "Three") Husband but in saying his name is "Third Man" because this is the third alias he gives Xiè Lián. (Some additional feels this gives me: It's like he's saying he's the same person Xiè Lián met before, that they shared all of that experience and it mattered, that he's the final form of that person wanting to be with Xiè Lián, that he's like a fairy-tale character with many names and forms and a true name and form and all along there was a trick or thread to follow in knowing and identifying him.) It just works out so perfectly because of the third way he introduces himself to Xiè Lián matching him being the third gong, and also the fairy-tale significant number of "three".

Finally, with the fourth gong, I've looked at Suika's TGCF Afterword translation, a NovelUpdates MDZS spoilers forum post by K.san crossposted to the Grim Reapers Have No Days Off spoilers forum by alexfilia, a reply to this post in r/tianguancifu by u/chenmochou, and also this post in r/tianguancifu by u/Loud_Daikon6167 which cites a TikTok I can't see either because of TikTok's thing about opening to a random page/the homepage or I assume the TikTok being removed or locked. Given the first NovelUpdates post maybe having more of a direct translation compared to the first Reddit post, it's still not definitive to me whether this is "actually more of a fandom thing, with MXTX acknowledging and participating in it enough to help make it possible" or it's "MXTX doing this on purpose with her name choices and character traits, whether she meant to have the pattern from the start or later, and yes could have been influenced by fandom" because I think "Other: 四少" is probably about the male lead(s) compared to it following "Protagonist: the uke's name is not determined yet" so it doesn't seem like the fandom came up with a nickname out of whole cloth. "Four young masters" is perfectly probable and could be equally reasonable, and "four ikemen" could even follow in reasonability; in fact it could be more likely and realistic since this is a modern setting, which would have different use of "young master" to me, and because we believe the gong to be the regular human and the shou to be the grim reaper. But for the wordplay, I would have liked it if the gong were the grim reaper and the "four theme naming" came from the famous "sì" (四 | 四) meaning "four" is homophonous with "sǐ" (死 | 死) meaning "die/death" and the latter being used in the Chinese for "grim reaper"/"death god".