#usc trojans headcanons
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USC TROJANS HEADCANONS
part 1 & part 2
2024 olympics opening ceremony in france featuring the foxes
shawn anderson’s scar
nabil mahmoud & antonio “tony” jones
shawn anderson / derrick allen / derek thompson
shane reed & kevin day
#hi hello i’m slowly starting on updating my pinned & masterlist so please bare w me#hopefully it will not only be easier to navigate but also look better and more organised#so dont mind me if u see me recycling my posts or sumn#the trojans social media au#all for the game#aftg#usc trojans#headcanons#usc trojans headcanons#the sunshine court#tsc#jean moreau#kevin day#jeremy knox#shawn anderson#shane reed#nabil mahmoud#tony jones#laila dermott#cat alvarez#catalina alvarez#ananya deshmukh#patrick toppings#cody winter#derrick allen#derek thompson#angie lewis#min cai#xavier morgan#lucas johnson
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WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK
#aftg#jean moreau#neil josten#the foxhole court#andrew minyard#jean moreau x jeremy knox#the sunshine court#all for the game#tfc#aftg memes#jeremy knox#aftg headcanons#jean moreau headcanons#usc trojans
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we know abby has seen some really terrible injuries during her time with the foxes/aftermath of spending time with the ravens so she saw jean and was somewhat prepared, but i can imagine the nurses/doctors/trainers for the trojans being absolutely appalled, driven to drink levels of disturbed by seeing jean’s medical records/x-rays/scars. like i can just imagine the coaches and team staff getting together to compare notes on jean and realizing how far into the deep end they were thrown (they’re all cursing kevin day and wymack, and jeremy a little)
#aftg fandom#aftg headcanon#aftg hc#aftg spoilers#aftg trilogy#aftg series#aftg#all for the game#edgar allen ravens#david wymack#kevin day#jean moreau#jeremy knox#abby winfield#usc trojans#the trojans#the sunshine court headcannon#the sunshine court spoilers#the sunshine court hc#the sunshine court#tsc hc#tsc#tsc spoilers#the foxhole court#the foxes#nora sakavic#edgar allan ravens#palmetto state university#palmetto state foxes#maren's thoughts
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The day after Jean tells Jeremy how he came to the us Jeremy sends him one of those ‘uve been sold to 1D’ fics then immediately lies face down on the ground beating himself up about it while Jean is nearly pissing himself with laughter reading it
#I just think that’s how Jeremy would deal#jean becomes obsessed with them#i love jean moreau#jeremy knox#jean moreau my beloved#jean moreau#jean moreau deserves the world#aftg jean#usc trojans#aftg trojans#aftg shitpost#aftg#aftg hc#aftg headcanon#aftg funny#aftg jeremy
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I love how the AFTG fandom has been expanded upon so far from the Canon content; I don’t mean just overwriting potentially questionable canon choices but also creating its own content surrounding the USC Trojans, Pro-teams etc, like Laila and Alvarez were created in response to the first fanfiction written about TFC being about the Trojans and two original female characters a fan wrote about, It’s so interesting to read about when someone creates fan fiction surrounding topics that weren’t even touched upon in canon, or the fact that the majority of us, despite not being mentioned, come to the same conclusions and head canons regarding certain characters, like we’ve all universally agreed that Matt and Dan aren’t white, Allison is tall, or Jeremy is tanned etc
#in other fandoms there’s so much arguing based on fancasts/headcanons etc it’s crazy how most of us have reached the same conclusion lol#Luke of course there’s the occasions out of pocket of differing idea but generally it’s all like REALLY similar#all for the game#aftg#andrew minyard#neil josten#the foxhole court#andreil#tfc#all for the gay#usc trojans#discourse#kevin day#all for the idiots#all for the intellectuals#jean moreau#jeremy knox
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No one asked, but im gonna throw up some of my Laila Dermott hcs bcs I want them to see the light of day, before TSC abolishes their possiblity.
Laila is:
- from the East Coast, some big town with the vibe of NJ or Detroit.
- jewish, bcs I said so
- orphaned at 10 in some accident or other, probably car crash but im not sure if her parents were in a car or pedestrians.
- had a much older sister, 16 years older or so, that her mom had really, really young - who ran away from home and OD'd when Laila was about 5.
- had a big, although eccentric, family, so she was taken in by an aunt and uncle after her parents death. They had 3 sons. The uncle was Laila's mother's brother, and his wife was italian.
- had massive anxiety bcs of trauma processing, so doctor said to find her an outlet.
- started doing martial arts and was really good, but while her anxiety got better in terms of physical symptoms, her anger issues started showing more and more in sparring
- so, she stepped back from MA and tried out for Exy instead. One of her cousins was already training, so they kept each other motivated through the almost-sibling rivalry.
- all her cousins and she also had private swimming lessons once a week growing up, so she's really good at swimming.
- she's the most minimalist elegance aesthetic jock to ever exist.
- introverted but very opinionated, the kind that people she's in class with think is a bitch just by the resting bitch face alone, even thought they never spoke to her.
- reads DCU comic books like they're Torah.
- she and Catalina call each other Cat and Bat (Laila means Night, so Batman really fits, fight me) as pet names jokingly because of that
- their mutual crush is so evident it's painful to watch
- majoring in sports management because she's nothing if not a control freak (affectionate) who has her whole career planned out 5 years ahead in case she doesn't make it as a pro athlete.
- still does martial and swimming recreationally as part of endurance training.
- allergic to soy and cocoa.
- surprisingly not a night owl in the slightest.
#laila dermott#aftg#tsc#the sunshine court#all for the game#usc trojans#catalina alvarez#laila x alvarez#jeremy knox#jean moreau#the foxhole court#aftg headcanon#aftg hc#tfc hc#tsc hc#the sunshine court hc#all for the game headcanon#tfc
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in my head Jean Moreau has a sister, couple of years younger than him, and their relationship is so tragic yet beautiful, because like the twins they have only reunited late in their youth, and i want you all to know that this is something so personal to me & they are my everything
#i may or may not have a years-old slowburn wip about them#jean moreau is alienated big brother energy#younger sister reveal...?#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court#tfc#jean moreau#jeremy knox#jerejean#usc trojans#aftg hc#aftg headcanon
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Bringing back my favorite non-described Trojan Side Character, Emma Swift <3 to drop some little headcanons and tidbits and things that get hinted at in Smoke & Spurs
- She’s from a tiny town near the Arizona/California border
- Grew up on a dairy farm
- Drives a rusted out blue pickup, the thing is halfway to falling apart on the side of the road but she loves it. She also claims that since it looks like a hunk of junk it’s less likely to get broken into in LA (which has been proven right thus far)
- Started playing exy in middle school, trying to have an extracurricular after school because her mom couldn’t pick her up right away and her dad didn’t want to drive all the way into town from the farm
- She was awful at first. She played goalie for awhile because it was the last line of defense and everybody else just worked harder to keep the ball away from her.
- She’d spend hours practicing at the farm, well after dark relying on the lights from the barn and a headlamp.
- By the time she made it to the high school team she was playing as a Striker because she was smaller framed, fast, and had built up a decent amount of strength simply pushing around cattle all day.
- Edgar Allen tried to recruit her during her season her senior year. Thea had come with, being local-ish at the time and knowing ravens like to travel in groups.
- She turned them down simply because she didn’t want to live that far from home. She didn’t realize the bad vibes and totally idolized Kevin, but wanted to be within a couple hours of her mom and dad.
- she didn’t get recruited by USC but listed her sport under her extracurriculars when she applied. They offered her a spot on the line up since they had a lot of senior strikers graduating.
- She’s majoring in Business Law, she wants to help save the small family farms of America from corporations taking up so much of the market share.
- her and Thea got along weirdly well, choosing to keep in minimal contact after Emma’s pestering. She didn’t quite understand why Thea seemed so adverse to it.
- she has a dog named Sparky and a horse named Daffodil that are her phone wallpaper and she shows everybody pictures of constantly.
- The Trojans gc gets the occasional photo of her doing crazy farm nonsense throughout the summer. One time, it was just her riding a cow with 0 explanation.
- Her and Jean don’t click at first and she just off handedly says “It’s weird, Thea says you’re so nice,”
- Jean getting violent whiplash bc how does she know Thea
- Slowly he warms up to her, it’s kind of like the older brother instinct. Except he watches her drop a man on his ass with one punch and realizes he doesn’t need to be protective at all, she’s pretty much able to handle herself.
- Her being a weird Kevin fangirl and then actually meeting him on the court and Jean being like “he is really not that special”
- she teases about Jean’s French accent. He can’t even be bitchy about it because she speaks fairly good French (4 years in high school)
- Jeremy and Emma chaotic blonde striker duo. “The dumb blondes” and her being offended because his hair is bleached. “He’s not even a natural blonde!”
Idk I’m obsessed w/ the idea of her
#aftg#all for the game#fanfic#the raven king#the foxhole court#the sunshine court#the kings men#jerejean#Emma swift#aftg trojans#usc trojans#Canon character basically becoming an OC.
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Ive been bothering everyone I possibly can by dropping asks abt Aaron in their inbox soo it's ur turn now
Any Aaron hcs? Your opinion on skater boy Aaron?
And because I love Kevin too, any Kevin hcs? I feel like people tend to forget that Kevin likes photography too canonically besides exy and history
OMG I JUST SAW THIS THANK YOU FOR ASKING HEHEHEHE
Skater boy Aaron is real and true and canon (to me at least)
He is the poster boy for the early 2000s skater aesthetic
Part of the reason he continues skating in college is because he enjoys the heart attack it gives Kevin
Kevin doesn’t want him getting hurt and jeopardizing the team and his wellbeing
So Aaron makes sure he finds time to skate everyday
Aaron is a lover of pop culture and is just a fucking nerd dude
He loves Lord of the Rings and read Harry Potter as it came out (and also very actively hates JKR in the modern day)
Aaron Minyard is a chronic migraine girly
He’s a med student and athlete who gets very little sleep so his head constantly hurts
And yaknow what he’s a little bitch about it too
He is constantly complaining to Katelyn and using it as an excuse to be an asshole
(I love him so dearly)
I also think he is constantly cold and has terrible blood circulation
His hands and feet are always freezing
Years of drug use and constantly needing to take Advil for his headaches has just shot his cardiovascular system
So he’s constantly cold and doesn’t run a lot because his stamina is shit
He has a raging addiction to caffeine and his vice is RedBulls
His sleep schedule is absolutely wrecked from both Exy and school so he’s rarely ever without a RedBull in hand
I don’t think he cares a lot about his diet but he does try to keep it pretty nutrient packed bc he knows the benefits of it
But he also has a sweet tooth (not as strong as Andrew’s but still strong) and he favors baked goods like cake and banana bread and pastries
His vision is bad and it just keeps getting worse over the years but he doesn’t wear his glasses often
He usually resorts to contacts but has to switch to his glasses late at night or when his head is hurting extra bad
OKAY KEVIN FUCKING DAY
He loves tea
Like has an extensive tea collection and will spend the money to buy teas from around the world
He also has a mug collection (the Foxes start gifting him mugs every holiday when they find out about it)
His favorite mugs are his vintage Trojans mug, a “history is not boring” mug the Foxes gave him when he graduated, and a Hogwarts mug Aaron gave him
(they read the series together :P)
Kevin’s favorite areas of history to study are Ancient Rome and the history of Ireland
He’s fascinated by the Roman Empire and studying Ireland makes him feel more connected to his mother
I think he continues school on the side and eventually gets a doctorate degree and teaches a bit after he retires from Exy
He always tries to sign with teams in or near the cities the other OG Foxes are in because he doesn’t really know how to function without the familiarity of his people
Kevin works a lot on undoing his Raven dietary habits and since he’s surrounded by people who can’t cook he grows a love for frozen food as well as caffeine
I think he takes a few art classes and really enjoys it even though he doesn’t think he’s that great at it
He’s actually not bad at all and makes a lot of really cool pieces
Kevin exclusively wears 5 inch inseam shorts
Anything longer is blasphemous
He has basically zero sense of style and just kind of mimics what the others are wearing
Until Allison forces him to go to the mall with her and they spend hours building him a real wardrobe that is him
Most of his closest still consists of PSU and USC merch though
And truly would this even be me if I didn’t put kevaaron headcanons? No
Kevin is basically a human radiator, especially after practice
And that is a blessing directly from God in Aaron’s eyes
Kevin comes back from night practice and Aaron just clings to him, absorbing all of his heat as they fall asleep
Aaron is a chronic clothes stealer like he just has sticky fingers when it comes to Kevin’s wardrobe
They spend a lot of time together in the library
They’re both in quite intensive and workload heavy majors so they study together a lot
It happened more as an accident tbh like Aaron was heading to the library to study for a midterm
And basically all of PSU’s student body had the same idea so there was no open tables
But low and behold there was Kevin, alone at a table tucked in the back corner, typing away at his laptop
Aaron joins him without asking and it kinda just becomes their thing
Kevin joins Aaron at the library between regular and night practices
They spend most of their weekends there and bring each other caffeinated drinks and snacks
Eventually they’re not even studying half the time, they’re just talking and spending time with each other outside of Exy and the other Foxes curious glances and prying comments
Aaron takes a history class with Kevin but Kevin refuses to take any science class outside of his required credits
He’s not a science person so Aaron doesn’t take it personally
Kevin can never properly wrap his head around how strong Aaron actually is
It just doesn’t compute for him, like how can so much strength be packed into such a small body
But he is most definitely not complaining, especially not when that strength is so clearly but on display or used against him
Kevin is practically drooling anytime he watches Aaron body check a striker twice his size and send them sprawling onto the floor
They become each others partners/marks during practices and it is simultaneously the best and worst thing to ever happen
They’re just excessively flirting while tripping each other and fighting with their racquets
The other Foxes comment on their “weird and disturbing foreplay” every chance they get
#thank you anon for giving me the chance to rant#I love these little idiots#so I hope you enjoyed#the kevaaron demons are loud and I cannot control them#aftg#all for the game#aaron minyard#kevin day#aftg headcanon
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Another headcanons list for the PSU Monsters.
Neil
During his depressive episodes, he just starts acting like a complete idiot. Using emojis excessively when he texts (which the amount greatly increases during these times) or makes posts on the internet or the team socials.
He also frequently makes unprompted jokes about his trauma. During a bonfire, "Oh damn, just realized I could have had smores when I burned my mothers body in her car".
During a movie night to a character, "Hey, your dad tried killing you too? Same! Twins???"
During a math exam, "Well damn, this 'x' is so good at staying anonymous he may as well have been me on the run" (to which his teacher goes, "Excuse me What?")
Andrew
Andrew starts talking to Bee for advice and not just to talk about everything and she suggests exposure therapy for the touch, writing or some creative activity for the emotions, and music to help him regulate when he gets overwhelmed.
Andrew interprets this to standing with Nicky's hand on his upper arm for one singular second more than the day before. If he could suffer through Nicky's touch a little more every day, it was improvement and that's all he cared for.
For the creative activity he decided to start learning archery. He also drew but he enjoyed the feeling of success when he hit his target and the only way to get that with his drawings was to show people and he'd sooner die.
As for the music, he decided purchasing a loud as hell pair of discreet earbuds and putting them in literally all the time was the solution to that. If he couldn't hear the problems, they weren't his problems. (He thinks its hilarious that the rest of the Foxes think he's just ignoring them.)
Aaron
He drinks a religious amount of coffee. He was a full time med student, an athlete, fighting the mafia in a angry version of Lacrosse, and too busy keeping himself out of the Foxes internal drama to sleep.
His go to drink for emergency energy is a black coffee with seventeen sugars and eight creamers, but when he was drinking it to wake up after a good quality nap or a once in a century night of sleep, he'd go with something sweet.
Once Aaron tried getting Andrew to lay back on the cigarettes and Andrew told him to lay back on the coffee. He wouldn't so Andrew kept his cigarettes.
Nicky
Nicky loves reading classics. He sometimes gets them in German to practice reading German, but when he does he gets the English version too.
He's a whore for Shakespeare's works. His favorite is Hamlet and that one where the identities get mixed up. He keeps a log of all the books he read and rates them on a scale of Andrew to Jesus. Andrew thinks him being a rating is funny but will never admit it.
He's gotten to the point where he can understand Shakespeare's work and diction without needing a second to process it or a translation like most of the rest of team.
Kevin
Terrible driver. Not because he was never taught how but simply because he gets too worked up over everything and thinks there's too much to focus on. Other cars, street signs, speed limits, turn signals, road construction, pedestrians, other cars. (very important to him because no matter how good of a driver you are you can still get in a car accident and die because someone else isn't.)
He lets Neil sit in the front seat and just chills in the back with Aaron but when Aaron gets his own car, Kevin starts riding with him places because (gay) he doesn't like third wheeling Andrew and Neil.
He jokingly decorates Aaron's passenger seat with Exy stickers (at least five are USC trojan themed), a compartment between the seat and the center console to hold his stuff because he drops them a lot and they fall into that gap, a sun glasses clip, and jokingly pinned a picture of the trojans on the sun visor.
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jeremy knox is not an only child
#i just know it#he has siblings#im sure he does#more than one too#jeremy knox#usc trojans#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court#tfc#the raven king#trk#the kings men#tkm#aftg headcanon#aftg hc#except is it a headcanon if i know im right
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Can I request Boys for the WIP game please?
[ WIP GAME ]
goddd i genuinely thought i’d be quicker to reply to the WIP Game inboxes but turns out i’m just as bad with replying when it comes to those LMAO im sorry 😭 anyways i had posted before about a headcanon/idea where raven!jean liked playing against the trojans because of their ‘nice sportsmanship’ act but not because they were so nice— he likes to test out how much he can get under their skins during the game so yeah i decided to write it (this scene takes part before the WIP i posted earlier this week):
Loud cheers filled the court when Jean Moreau stole the ball from his opponent with a violent slam. He heard the familiar sound of the raven chant while passing the ball to Cameron Winter. The Edgar Allen Ravens were playing against the USC Trojans in their final match of the season. They only had a few minutes left, but the Ravens were ahead with four points. The comfortable gap was not reason enough for them to hold back and start playing politely as the Trojans seemed to be so keen on doing. Jean liked playing aggressively, especially against this team.
He liked pushing the Trojans to see if he could catch them slipping in their kindness. He had found Nabil Mahmoud, one of their strikers, cursing Jean out under his breath a few times, which felt like a victory in itself to Jean.
Jeremy, however, was not someone Jean could easily catch off guard. Typically, a violent slam like the one Jean had just pulled would at least evoke an annoyed huff from his opponents. Jeremy Knox, on the other hand, merely focused on catching his breath before sending a nod Jean’s way. Jean was even convinced there was a smile hidden behind Jeremy’s helmet, but he didn’t get enough time or space to confirm this theory, leaving Jean both annoyed and a bit confused.
When the buzzer sounded the win for the Edgar Allen Ravens was sealed. The Ravens had once again secured another championship, leaving the Trojans in second place. If this had been Jean’s first final, he would have been surprised to find his opponents so disappointed—it had been obvious that the Ravens would win, just like they had always done.
#WIP Game#if this looks familiar its bc i did post a screenshot for it a few weeks ago shdkdhd#and i had published the first chapter of this fic on ao3 but it didnt take long for me to regret it and rewrite the chapter so 🫣🫣🫣#anyway#this is going to be a jerejean fic#:)#all for the game#aftg#jean moreau#jas writes#jas writes: boys
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“Go little rockstar” and its Renee and Kevin seeing Jean recovering and getting along with the trojans and getting the happy ending he deserves with Jeremy Knox
#yes I am in my jerejean feels okay I fucking love them sm#Jean is a baby I’ll protect him#aftg#all for the game#aftg incorrect quotes#tfc#the foxhole court#Jean Moreau#Jeremy Knox#jerejean#jean x jeremy#jeremy x jean#usc trojans#usc#trojans#aftg reread#aftg series#aftg headcanon#aftg trilogy#aftg hc#aftg fandom#aftg textpost#aftg shitpost#tfc shitpost#tfc incorrect quotes#incorrect tfc#tfc textpost#tfc meme#the king’s men#the kings men
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cat paints jean's nails black. jeremy almost dies *anime bloody nose rection type shit*
#aftg#nora sakavic#the sunshine court#jean moreau#all for the game#tsc#aftg fandom#aftg series#aftg trilogy#the foxhole court#jerejean#jeremy knox#cat alvarez#catalina alvarez#aftg trojans#aftg tsc#tsc hc#tsc headcanon#usc trojans#jean yves moreau#laila dermott#maren's thoughts
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✨aftg headcanon:✨
Jeremy Knox has bipolar disorder.
As someone diagnosed with bipolar II disorder, and has type I present in their family, this might just be me projecting, but I still like this idea.
I appreciate aftg’s representation of treatment through Andrew’s journey with psychotherapy and boundary building (I just like to pretend Nora’s lack of understanding on medication was a thing at all, since I’m also a psych major and that shit was abysmal to read).
However, I like to think that Jeremy could offer a different form of representation, that is still very drastic but possibly more accurate.
So here it is:
Jeremy has bipolar I disorder, but is not vocal about the diagnosis. However, to his family, friends, and team, it is something he very obviously struggles with.
However, during a particularly bad month where a manic episode he has been dealing with has reached its peak, it becomes something that the foxes become aware of.
~
The trojans and the foxes are in the middle of a joint practice. Everyone is either on the court or catching their breaths on the sidelines. Wymack is supervising and Abby is making notes about who needs more k-tape for the next practice. There is music playing on the loud speakers, and drills are going really well. Jeremy however, is not in attendance. Nobody seems worried about this, and Coach Rheman is also not present, so everyone just assumes they are off discussing a future game.
All of a sudden though, Coach Rheman comes barging into the court with Betsy close behind him. Wymack is about to call a break in the practice, but Rheman beats him to it. He holds up a plastic bag with 2 empty pill bottles and demands to know from his team the last time they saw Jeremy. Jean, Laila and Alvarez are automatically on the go; Laila is calling his phone and Jean is swearing he didn’t notice the empty pill bottles from their shared room. The foxes are confused as to what is happening, but the trojans pay no attention to them as Rheman demands they break off and start searching. Betsy clarifies, without giving aware personal or confidential information, that Jeremy had left his meeting with Rheman early in an obvious state of paranoia, and had apparently been as such since he woke up this morning.
I imagine the trojans and the foxes splitting up to find him, only for him to come back himself to the foxhole lounge, still in an episode. I imagine Betsy trying to calm him down, but his paranoia not lessening; instead he begins to fear for the safety of the foxes.
Andrew, with his experience in foster care and with mental health, and Aaron with his premed experience, begin going around the room opening doors and looking under furniture to try and show Jeremy that nobody is there and nobody is coming after them.
He eventually is able to calm down, and Betsy takes him to the nearest inpatient facility. The Trojans stay in South Carolina while Jeremy is being held, as it is the off season, and prepare to support him for when he is released. During their stay they grow closer with the foxes, and the similarities between them start to show; the unwavering loyalty and support they have for one another, and their diversity.
~
again, thinking of actually writing this one-shot🥺 I’ve never actually written a full blown fic before though, so I’m a little worried it won’t translate well.
hope you guys like this one!! xx
#jeremy knox#aftg headcanon#all for the game headcanon#aftg hc#jean moreau#laila dermott#alvarez#usc trojans#the trojans#all for the game#aftg#aftg fanfic#aftg fanfiction#the foxes#david wymack#betsy dobson#dan wilds#allison reynolds#matt boyd#renee walker#neil josten#andrew minyard#aaron minyard#nicky hemmick#the foxhole court#the raven king#the king's men#prettypipedreamheadcanons#mine
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I WAS LOOKING FOR A JEREMY BPD/ANGER ISSUES POST I THOUGJT I HAD SEEN THIS MORNING PLEASE WRITE YOUR HEADCANNONS AGAIN I BEG OF YOU GIVE JEREMY KNOX THE LOVE HE DESERVES
Okay so this is long overdue, but might as well. I guess this is an observation of fandom Jeremy as much as the canon one, so don't come at me.
I dunno read Jeremy as having BPD bcs... bcs honestly have you ever met anyone who has Sunshine shining from their ass? Me neither. Though I have met ppl with severe personality issues who had a coping mechanism like that, of course they weren't young and talented sportsmen looked up to by many ppl and rooted for by many, so they had enough free space and privacy to go absolutely fucked up at other ppl when they were having bad brain hours.
Yes im including myself here.
The name of the game is If I Give Them No Reason to Leave Me They Won't.
Or If I Give Them No Things To Hate Me For They Won't Hurt me.
But spice it up with black and white thinking, paranoia and unhelathy behaviours jumping off the standard spectrum of bottling things out into like, going on a 4 hour run to cool off bcs you are undeserving bcs you are a bad captain bcs you're annoyed at the freshmen bcs they dont care about your shared goals enough and is thay really a them issue? Or is it actually a You issue? Are you blaming others for your own failures again? Look at yourself, you're fucking pathetic, and egoistic at that, you demand things from others but how do you show you care for what others need huh? You think you're a good captain? Keep telling yourself that, before you know it they will all turn against you. Because you're a failure, bcs you cant even make them care? Maybe you're just not a good enough player , or maybe they can see straight through you, see what you are udnerneath the happy exterior. Yo have just not good enough, not trying hard enough, and you want them to look up to.. to That???
Or maybe it is a them issue bcs fuck that, fuck the smiling, fuck the caring, you don't actually care, if they don't care, why would you? 🤔 you don't owe anyone anything you are so done with everyone and everything cant they LEAVE YOU THE FUCK ALONE, HAVENT YOU DONE ENOUGH TO HAVE AT LEAST ONE SMALL THING GO RIGHT ONCE? YOU ARE SO FUCKKNG ANGRY so you have to do something you feel like smashing something, you could, your body is literally a machine, you could show them what you actually think about their Opinions, how pathetic and annoying they are and actually fuck that you have to leave you cant stand being in the same room as them for one second longer.
But the sunshine Jeremy 🌞 exterior slips on so even though you want to crash the doors closed you smile and wave and say something stupid and cheery you even have a fucking spring in your step.
Bcs you're a fucking liar a fucking impostor you can't help it at this point you are a clay figurine that's hollowed out inside.
You are so tired it's like there's a lump of cloth absolutely soaked weighting on your lungs
You actually feel like crying while you wave at alvarez from the stretch of the corridor, making goddamn plans to meet up for group studying maths later in the evening while your lungs constrict holding down a sob.
You hate them all for the next 3 hours.
And then on hour four while you're circling the campus heading back from your walk/jog/run/staring into the distance/jog again you tap into the very comfortable very familiar hating of yourself.
This is a light version of course but I bet Jeremy is that person that dissapears sometimes like at parties ect bcs they are doing some absolutely stupid shit like having sex with a complete stranger or getting drunk but they know enough about the emptiness and self hatred they will feel ten minutes after they succumb to thay behaviour that they learned to do it when the judgment of the ppl who know them won't touch this piece of him. Bcs it feels like a separate piece.
Like he is parcelled into different breeds of fucked up inside and they are all set on a loop in a music playing machine from a highway diner. One song ends another starts you can choose which one if you throw in a dime.
And also we gotta add in the sensory issues, he sees things, he hears them, sometimes he does a dodge while there's nothing coming bcs he thought it was. Some weeks it feels almost he lives from one training to the next bcs he doesn't remember a minute from what's in between. Good thing he taught himself this sunny persona bcs its an autopilot mode that gets him having to answer the least amount of questions when he doesn't fucking remember what happened from 8 am till late afternoon that day.
#jeremy knox hc#just my headcanons#jeremy knox#jeremy knox has bpd#bpd problems#with a douse of#anger issues#on the side#aftg#all for the game#tfc#the foxhole court#aftg headcanon#aftg hc#the sunshine court#tsc#usc trojans#tfc headcanon
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