#unsure what the context for this one is
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for @hyperfixated-maybe!
#octonauts#octonauts fanart#octonauts dashi#octonauts tweak#unsure what the context for this one is#...am i allowed to tag this as twashi.#ignore low quality... id ont know how to fix it rip
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2021 Shadowlands fanart.
#world of warcraft#anduin wrynn#Garrosh follows this with something like 'yeah your not but maybe i am' so i sorta take the quote out of context but#I remember Anduin being very upset about the mere idea hes compaired to Arthas#Its always seemed to me that his similarities with arthas are something that lowkey bothers him because so many only see that in him#Of course people hurt by Arthas will be a bit weary of a human boy with blonde hair who claims to champion the light and justice#Especially one who is a prince of an important human kingdom#So its something hes self-conscious of and is keen to prove people he's not destine to fail#Which is why#even if he didn't become another Arthas entirely#what happens in SLs is so much more traumatic to him#He hurt people he cared about#he hurt innocent souls#((and his situation of mind control is more akin to sylvanas' then arthas but does he see that that way? Or do his fears blind his view?))#And blizz didnt go into detail what this meant but Arthas was used against him literally#My headcanon is that Anduin knew and could feel it and hear arthas in the sword#but in the cinematic anduin is surprised by arthas' soul appearing so canon says anduin didnt know#He dissappers because he is unsure if the bad feelings he felt orignated from him or zovaal or arthas so#prehaps he is afraid that everyone was right to be weary of him#Maybe he didnt end up as arthas at the end of shadowlands but that doesnt mean he can't still go down a dark path#he is afraid he is more capable of becoming an unjust and cruel leader then he thought he could#His people have every right to be upset that he abandoned them#but they dont know that he left because he was afraid he could hurt them and feel joy from it
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i would like to find a yarn color that is roughly close to this shade of orange:
as the doll is going to be using dark blue eyes and the contrast would look pretty good (ty to my friend for helping me narrow down colors here lol) but well. you would not believe how hard it is to find a more muted light orange. i have been to specialty yarn sites. if i did either of the two multi-colored yarns, it would be for highlights/still mostly orange just with other tones in there :) if u have specific opinions on this please comment bc good god i hate yarn shopping for this.
#twist rambles#bjd posting#technically. i am having the horrors of trying to figure out yarn for her bc NONE of my typical companies have the right yarn color. like#hex code E89052 is IMPOSSIBLE to get a color similar. i need a light orange but not TOO light and i want it to like... look ok w her dark#blue eyes. which REAL funny story about that is barely any dolls that look like her have dark blue eyes like... its mostly light blue. so i#is just a nightmare to logistics w colors. i really like the landscapes a LOT and i think it could be fun to do like... highlights/multicol#ored hair but well. lol. the horrors#ive been looking at the fruits one for days bc its like... genuinely so stunning and i think it could be fun to have small light highlights#mixed in there. but im sooo unsure of like. what would work best. i have to plan ahead before she comes in like... a couple weeks#ill srb a couple times :)#this is for miss yucky btw. for context. but im trying to get this sorted b4 the strike
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At least the moon will keep him company in the dead of night
#micas art#twst#twisted wonderland#malleus draconia#a little bit of context for this:#this is based on my headcanon that malleus suffers from insomnia#there is something weirdly isolating and lonely about the night#when the world gets quiet and cold and dark and you feel like the only moving breathing thing in it#what could he do but wait for it to pass on his own?#its no ones burden to bear but his own and hes not some child who needs to be coddled to sleep#(but maybe. just maybe on the nights where it gets particularly bad he might crave a soft hand to gently comb through his hair)#(hes seem lilia do it countless times for silver when he was little. the memory always makes his bed feel a little bit colder)#also for anyone curious (and bc im unsure i drew it very well) the flower is a white chrysanthemum!#i definitely need to practice flowers more#but uwauuuuughkg this piece was so draining to work on. it gave me so much trouble and im still not completely sold on it#still hope it will resonate with people and that you can all enjoy it!!
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i AM actually done writing today. to continue working on nanaflynn first date fic later.
#shitpost#tbh i could probably write so many first date fics#this one is difficult because ti's so like. specifically structured?#this fic has a purpose and a context that isn't what i usually go for so that why its feeling so wonky to me#also im debating splitting the next chapter#but im unsure
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I've been sharing 50 shades quotes and moments hand selected to be humorous and ridiculous, but I believe I've given you all a false impression of the book as bad in just silly ways, just funny quips. What I haven't shared are the subtly homophobic and stereotypical characters of color and inaccurate mental health portrayals (including suicide), among other issues:
the one hispanic character smokes weed illegally (this is used to paint him negatively) and tries to force himself on ana, saying the most basic spanish phrases to remind you he's hispanic; there are only three other characters of color I can think of, all black, one is a black kickboxer and christian's trainer (always making quips and antagonizing him while they fight), one is the kickboxers brother, and the other is a personal security guard christian fires and whom ana says she doesn't really like (when she's never had that kinda problem with any other security personnel); one character is introduced as "small, dark, and gay. I loved him immediately" and is an overdramatic hairdresser; the most "normal" queer character doesn't have the fact she's dating a woman revealed until her very last appearance in the series, and she's already very infrequent (ana also happily notes that this means Ros won't be ogling her husband); Christian's mother is described as looking "relieved" when she finds out he isn't gay like she assumed; the author conflates Multiple Personality Disorder (an outdated term for Dissociative Identity Disorder, but that's what they use) with schizophrenia as if DID is someone experiencing schizophrenia; when a character attempts suicide christian asks and I quote "why would she do this to me?"
I'm making jokes at the expense of the books, but I've been generally not sharing the genuinely unpleasant aspects. they're all fairly small, but they are numerous. I'm sure there's details I'm forgetting at the moment as well. so if you wanted to read it ironically with me, there's also all this to contend with
#50 shades trilogy#tw suicide#tw racism#tw homophobia#i'm focusing on the silly lines because the humor is a light in the dark#but like. everything generally sucks#there are so many little moments that add up#christian has a line about fantasizing about ana with another woman. and its like. thought crime isn't real#but with the rest of the book's context and vibe...that doesn't mean it's nice to hear about you fantasizing about queerness#as if its for your own pleasure christian#anyway. i've been just keeping the ickier parts to myself because I'm reading the book ironically#but I fear I've mischaracterized it#so. alerting you#book sucks beyond uninteresting smut scenes#AND i'm only one person so someone else with a different intersectional identity would probably notice things#i've unintentionally overlooked#i have noticed christian's 'philanthropy' in his business. unsure what to make of it quite yet#if I'm making problems where there aren't any#i would've included mrs. lincoln on the list but since christian does eventually come around (after 3 entire books)#and stop defending her pedophilic actions. i omitted it#anyway. wish me luck y'all
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I feel like I keep getting other people's asks because I keep getting asks completely unrelated to anything I've posted or am posting. It's kind of funny because I'm like "what is the context here" but also I am very confused.
#there were a couple people who either thought this was an ask blog or tried to rp or something?#and then another one about women and i mean women are great but I'm unsure what the context of this conversation is#sometimes i just don't answer asks because. i don't know how to respond to that#I'm just vibing here bro#things I say
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Still recovering from himeru telling yuta to call personal snacks and clothings buisness expenses
#moth is reformating the text for a crazy b book and so they ve been partially rereading nightclub its kinda slow but 💪we ve got it#still unsure what to include or cut out like center stories yea 4* fs gacha stories probably but like 4* ts maybe??#just one chapter of detective dance#adding the context that its about L$ so not techinacally tax fraud but....
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[image #1 id: A tweet by @/esdin (Ted DiNola | Virtual Realist) that reads,
“Regulatory Bodies: "ADHD medication is highly addictive"
ADHD Folks: "Wait... did I take my pills?"”
end id]
[image #2 id: Tumblr tags that read, “‘the struggle’; ‘drug seeking behaviour: I’m seeking where I put the goddamn bottle’”. end id]
#okay but wait this is actually a very real problem with the narrative happening in the mental health world#so some context I’m a research psych student (I care about the ways we can fix the problems I’m not interested in the individual problems#(that’s what therapists do)). and one of the things I do as a postgrad is tutor on psychology courses at the university . which means I end#up marking a lot of the course content that undergrad students submit. and something we see a lot (especially with the first years) is this#idea that the mental illness and the things you do or would need to do in order to manage it aren’t being grasped as LIFELONG.#which means when they get asked questions like ‘what is the disadvantage of psychotic medication’ I get to read fun answers like ‘it could#highly addictive’ and I have to be like ‘okay if someone has to take this medication in order to function it is not an addiction it’s a#necessity to their lives’.#and I’m entirely unsure how to go about changing this narrative#but like medication to keep you functioning is not an addiction. metal illness is not (as far as we know) curable. currently it’s onl#only manageable. which is what makes it so difficult to research and intervene and prevent.#anyway. ANYWAY. I’m done now. change the narrative. start with you.
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I just fucked up a road paving project because I thought the workers yelling at me not to were unrelated people fucking with me and I can’t even explain myself because that sounds insane.
#If i have learned one thing in my time on this earth it’s that sometimes people you don’t or barely know#Will try to joke with you by saying something false and then laughing#If I had a nickel for every time a man has said something like ‘’oh no don’t do that!!’�� when I’m about to like. put something down#somewhere and then laughed at me because he was joking…anyway#I’m bringing my cat back from the vet having parked away from the roadwork and between me and my driveway is a gunked up road#I look up and down the street and don’t see a way around or through. There’s a shadow of boot prints already crossing the narrowest point.#And the letters we got said not to drive our cars in the cone zone but never said anything about walking.#So I go to experimentally touch the edge with my toe and hear ‘’No! No!!’’#It’s one of two slightly older men who’d been hanging around about half a block away. I look at them and#the other one says ‘’Absolutely not!’’ but they’re both grinning at me like. well#I thought like people grin when they’re fucking with me. Like how people have grinned when they’ve been fucking with me.#And they were just wearing tshirts and jeans no vests or anything and with context they were clearly on their lunch break or something but#I put the pieces together wrong and got ‘’random neighbors saw me acting unsure and decided to yell discouraging shit at me#(common older-than-me male behavior)’’#So I said something back (don’t remember what) and crossed at the narrow point.#Did my feet take huge chunks of half wet tar with them? I don’t know. Couldn’t see my feet around the cat crate.#And then when I was across the road and well back on allowed ground I heard one of them who had moved to be more in a direct line behind me#bellow ‘’GET OFF THE ROAD’’#and I thought ‘’Okay definitely fucking with me because I’m not even in the road anymore.’’#But I guess that was an expression of frustration if not an applicable instruction because they’re gonna have to#come back and re do it tomorrow because they were not fucking with me and I was not supposed to walk on the road.#Fuuuuuuck me#I feel so foolish and embarrassed#I came to such an unreasonable conclusion#I’m sorry#memories
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Gleaming in the moonlight Cool and clean and all I've ever known All I ever wanted Sweet perfumes of incense Graceful rooms of alabaster stone All I ever wanted
This is my home With my father, mother, brother Oh so noble, oh so strong Now I am home Here among my trappings and belongings, I belong And if anybody doubts it They couldn't be more wrong
I am a sovereign prince of Egypt A son of a proud history that's shown Etched on ev'ry wall Surely this is all I ever wanted All I ever wanted All I ever wanted
#audio; video#scopophobia tw#auv; one engine barely makes it away#((for some context: I have an idea with that au that Eli was still with that fishing village for some time recovering after the ambush#but was brought back to Dalmasca when it was assumed that he was Dalmascan#so he's reunited with Raminas and Ashe and regains some of his memories - mostly about himself and his place#and he's trying to convince himself that being a prince is the most important thing for him now#especially given what had happened and how he is no longer fit to serve#but he feels incredibly disconnected with his place both as prince and in his family#so this song is incredibly perfect because he's trying to convince himself it's what he wants and it's home#when really he wants to leave and be his own person - even though he's still unsure who he wants to be given his broken memory))
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I can't stop thinking about the relationship between Jon and Helen as perhaps one of the most important ones in the entire show. They are narrative parallels for each other, and they both know it. They've both known it from the very start!
Helen walks into the Archives, paranoid, unsure of who to trust, and Jon sees himself in her. And he thinks "If i can help her, maybe there's hope for me too." Then he can't save her. The next time they meet, she's a monster. They're both monsters. There was never any other way their stories could have gone, their fates entwined from the very start.
And Helen answers his original thought with one of her own: "Maybe if we can help each other, there's hope for us both." But Jon looks at her and sees everything that he fears becoming, and so he turns her away, and refuses to accept that their stories are still one and the same.
Helen went to the last person who was ever kind to her, the only person who both knew her as a human and had the context to understand what she'd become, and he hated her. He hated her because he liked Helen, and told her that she couldn't be Helen.
So she stopped trying to be Helen, and embraced being a monster. Reveled in it even. Then Jon wakes up from a six month coma, more monster than person, and tries so hard to cling to the things that mattered to him when he was human. Even with no support, even with the entire archives staff against him, he chooses humanity and compassion over and over again.
And this is a direct threat to Helen's world view. Their stories are entwined. If Jon can continue to be a person even after everything he's been through, then she could have clung to her humanity too, if only she'd tried a little harder. And that terrifies her! She wants to conceptualize herself as someone who was completely overwhelmed by forces beyond her control, who never had a choice but to become a monster. She want's to be an innocent victim. But Jon argues with his actions that they'd both had choices.
And, Jon, in turn, holds out hope that she might make better choices until the very end.
This is the conflict between them for all of season 4 and 5. Jon wants to prove that they can both be decent people, and Helen wants to prove that they were never going to be anything but monsters. This is why she's so devoted to trying to goad Jon into enjoying his newfound godhood. She knows that they are the same, and wants that to mean that he has a spark of evil inside of him, and not that she was always capable of doing good.
When Jon kills her, she loses her life, but wins the argument. Helen is nothing but a dangerous monster who needs to be killed for the good of everyone, and in the moment he decides that, Jon dooms himself to the same fate. Their stories are one and the same. "If i can help her, maybe there's hope for me too." he thought. But he couldn't help her, refused to, even, in the one moment when it actually mattered. And thus, there was never hope for him.
#the magnus archives#tma#jonathan sims#helen distortion#my rambles#i am not normal about them#helen did nothing wrong in her entire life#(aside from being a real estate agent)#Her story is just so tragic to me#She could have been better#she had choices#thats the entire point#but the choice was between a thankless attempt at retaining her personhood#with absolutely no support and no one who cared about her#or giving into the comforting lie that she never had a choice at all#She had choices and she made them but i don't think anyone could reasonably expect her to have done any better
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Chuuya's reaction to Dazai getting hurt during the Lovecraft fight has always been so interesting to me...
Because it's the kind of worry you'd never expect from a character as gruff as Chuuya, who had displayed nothing but hostility towards Dazai so far. Usually, characters that are labelled as "angry" or "anger issues" (which Chuuya is much more complex than that but you get my point) act more as a tsundere type of way when the one they "don't care about" gets hurt. And show their care in very, very subtle ways (ex. their eyes widen, their mouth parts and closes again, etc) before putting up their front once more.
Chuuya, however, is open, and vocal about it. His worry is clear not only to us, but to Dazai himself, the one he shouldn't be displaying the concern to (as per the cliche). Shouldn't it be some sort of secret that Chuuya does care? Isn't that what skk's dynamic has been shaping up to be until now?
I'm telling you- the way my mind blanked when Chuuya just casually.... showed concern not once, but twice, was a sight to see.
Besides, the context makes it much more confusing, because Dazai isn't some rookie, and Chuuya knows that more than anybody. He was the youngest executive in Port Mafia's history, of course he can handle a hit or two. Of course he'd seen him handle a hit or two, sometimes without batting an eye.
Heck, Chuuya himself was hurling Dazai like a ragdoll in their reunion, which was their last meeting. And you could argue that he was going easy on him, but Dazai has mostly withstood the same damage (as far as I could see), and Chuuya was as bitter as ever.
So that kind of contradicts both what we knew of Chuuya so far, and how their dynamic was shaped to be. I mean, that just makes Chuuya a hypocrite, yeah? What makes him care now, all of a sudden? What makes him care at all?
Well, to me, this backasswards reaction implies one (or more) of the following:
- Dazai rarely got physically hurt during their partnership and thus this is an unexpected thing for him to see (during a mission).
- The four years of separation made Chuuya unsure of how much Dazai can withstand physically now. Also the fact that he isn't in the mafia anymore, aka fighting enemy organizations on the weekly, would naturally make Dazai lose his touch in a way, what prompts Chuuya's reaction.
- Dazai getting taken off guard took him off guard which led to panic. Especially since the situation was (momentarily) out of their depth. Seriously wtf even was Lovecraft?
- During the dungeon scene Dazai was an enemy, while in the Lovecraft fight he was as an ally. The difference might be significant to Chuuya.
- This has always been Chuuya's reaction to Dazai getting hurt regardless of the situation.
- "Only I can hurt him like that" ahh logic
- Asagiri was still experimenting with their dynamic and thus there are some inconsistencies.
This scenario didn't play out again (after their reunion) for me to exactly determine which one is more plausible, but it is 100% canon for Chuuya to shamelessly show his concern and run to Dazai to check on him before properly dealing with their opponent, which I find to be such an appealing layer to their dynamic, and a good spin on the type of character he gets stereotyped as.
Bonus: Dazai also becomes a softy when Chuuya's hurt, especially post corruption. Dead Apple alone displays that multiple times.
All in all, Skk are doing a terrible job at maintaining their 'hostile' and 'antagonistic' relationship post their reunion. Freaks.
#I was too lazy to scour throgh SB and 15 and find Chuuya getting worried again which might prove the last points#tho I think they're the most unlikely#I love them displaying these sort of things openly#for Chuuya it's just natural to be concerned#it's natural to say 'because I trusted you'#and while Dazai isn't as expressive with his care#he never cowers away from calling Chuuya 'partner' after 4 years#or express that how he saved him was 'beautiful'#these things come so easily for them you wonder why they're even labelled as rivals at all#you *can't* give a clear label on their relationship#friends? they hate each other. Rivals? they care about each other. Partners? they haven't been for 4 years.#each one you put on gets contradicted at one point#and that's the beauty and fun of it#thanks for coming to my TED talk#bsd#bungou stray dogs#chuuya nakahara#dazai osamu#bsd chuuya#bsd dazai#skk#soukoku#bsd analysis#bsd headcanon#bsd headcanons#skk analysis#bsd meta#J's post#J's writing ✍🏽
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𝗟𝗢𝗢𝗦𝗘 𝗘𝗡𝗗𝗦
ft. bully! gojo satoru and geto suguru
content warnings college au, heavy bullying, gaslighting, noncon, dubcon, implied sexual assault, allusions to depression/suicide, alcohol consumption, drinking, implied drugging, fatphobia, overdosing, naoya zen'in is an asshole, humiliation, threats, minor oc character. dead dove do not eat.
notes this might come as disappointing since some of you wanting revenge what this two idiots had done to reader. their are some matters that i think is too complicated and impossible so i came with this way as the breaking point where reader starts to retaliate/plan her revenge. will get to it later and to that anon, who asked for the revenge, i will get once i start to finish this one up. please read the warnings, i don't want someone bitching in the comments telling me that the contents above is uncool. it truly is not cool. that's why it have warnings. it is on a fictional context. do read the warnings before continuing. also do let me know of what you think of this chapter.
read part one, here. two here.
SERIES MASTERLIST
synopsis you let them take and take what they can from you. you were a nobody after all but everybody have their breaking point.
the world is a blur to you. colors of red and blue dances in your vision while voices whispers to you. what's happening? you can't move. it's like your body were made of lead. you can't understand what they were saying. multiple faces stares at you, are you dead? is this what you see when people surround you while they lower your casket. is it? you hope it was, cause you didn't plan on living anymore. there's nothing worth moving forward and the world around you turns black.
there's a beep and then silence. you hear before you see and when you opened your eyes, all you can see is a bright light above you. it took you minutes to adjust your vision and realize where you are. you're in a hospital. laying on a bed and you started to get irritated at your oxygen mask. you tug at it. getting frustrated why it keeps coming back at you before someone put their hand on it. completely removing it and there you breath. your sight darted to the hand who helped you until your sight travels to his arms and then to his face. a brief recognition flashes through you.
“nanami?” you call his name unsure but you know it was definitely him. it was hard to mistake him for someone. there's his blonde hair, neatly parted. his pristine beige sweater paired a dark colored trouser, not a crinkle in sight and his signature silver watch in his wrist. you met him once at the literature club and decided you were going to be there too not until it changed due to some circumstances. his lips parted but before he can speak, a cheery voice interrupted him.
“she's awake!?” said haibara, you also knew him since he and nanami were always together. seeing your confused state, his voice died down. “what happened?” you asked them and they exchanged looks before haibara answers you.
“we found you passed out in the lawn. thought you were drunk but you weren't breathing.” haibara's voice was soft while he slowly breaks down the reason why you ended up here.
a doctor comes inside to your room before haibara can finish. you took note of her pristine white coat with her surname embroidered on it. clicking her pen and whipping out her clipboard she pulled out of nowhere. you were distracted by it. the doctor's eyes is on you now and you began to frown.
the doctor coughs clearing her throat before speaking. “hello, ms. (y/n). i'm glad you're awake now.” noticing your confused expression she pauses began answering the question. “to answer your question you were unconscious for two days and is brought for possible assault. we need your con—”
“no!”
“ms. it would help for you t—”
“you heard me!? i said no!” you scream at the doctor and your tears appeared in your eyes. you didn't realize you were screaming. nanami and haibara stand there in silence but the looks on their face said otherwise. concern painted in their faces and the doctor bows before leaving. looking at the men inside in your room to call her if you need anything.
cause if they would test you, they would find the remains of their sperm inside you and then report? who will believe you? it would be buried like the case of another girls like you who were too afraid nor fight their abusers. you don't find the point of that. they would twist the words out of you. it was easy to believe than you.
you curled up in bed and did the next thing you can. cry. now, you're in here and the events before this plays in your head in repeat.
“f-fuck”
satoru curses out while suguru bites your ear. your body like jello as they spilled their load for the nth that day. both of them lowered your body after fucking your brains out. warm up, they say. you shiver as you feel their cum running down your thighs. feeling disgusted as it began to stick after being exposed to the air. you grab the wipes but suguru stopped you, grabbing it from your hands and cleaning you up. fixing your skirt in the meantime.
“worth every penny.” suguru mutters. staring at the new clothes they bought for you. a baby blue corseted puff-sleeved, square neck top matched with a black skirt that rests on your mid thigh is what they forced you to wear. it feels tight. intentionally buying it one size smaller than you usually wore and it more feel you like a stuffed sausage rather a comfortable piece of clothing. you can't say no to what they wanted. you're a bit of grateful that they allowed you to wear your white sneakers rather than those kitten heels that would put your feet in blisters.
satoru's fingers brushes through the expanse of your exposed flesh. playing with the small bow in your top. sighing, “suguru, can we have more with (y/n)-chan?” his best friend chuckles at him. “idiot, we're already running late, after that we can.” satoru pouts. “tch, party pooper.” he ignores gojo and moves his attention to you.
“smile, this is your first real party. you're going to enjoy this.” suguru lifts your chin up with his finger and you obediently nodded. “ditch and you know what will happen.” he warns.
it was a bad idea. the moment you stood in the front door. the party was already in motion. you can hear the people inside shouting profanities and booming music mixed with already drunk frat members and student bodies. this was never really your crowd and when you were shoved inside with gojo and geto you were done and you already felt like crying. you look at the duo in front of you. they were already engaged in conversation with the other people here.
“gojo, you son of a bitch. you fucking came.” a guy hollered in the side and you see more of his features as he gets nearer. a snarl in his face with multiple piercings in his ear. a hair dyed blonde with green accents.
“ah, zen’in. wouldn't missed this just i could wipe that smirk off your face.” gojo mocks him and before the guy whom gojo called zen’in darts his sight to you. he raises a brow. “you two in fat bitches now?” pointing at you with hand cupping a plastic cup. gojo scoffs. “none of your business, zen'in.” glaring at him but he can't see that gojo's looking at him with dark glasses in the way. “then you two wouldn't mind me using her.” he suggested and suguru gaze darkens at him. “fuck off, naoya.” almost growling at naoya and the latter raises his hand in mock defeat before finding shit he could entertain himself with.
suguru scowls after naoya left, he looks at you like you just turned his mood sour. “you're an embarrassment.” he says and you bit your lip. keeping the tears at bay and you don't really want to embarrass yourself more at this party. “hey, hey suguru.” gojo taps his shoulder. “let loose, don't naoya get to you.” satoru glances at you. his blue eyes peering in his glasses. “you're right.” his stare cold at you. “find a seat, (y/n). you're embarrassing us now with you around.” you nod and you find yourself in a vacant corner. near to those already wasted or just plain chilling in the couch in front of you.
what did you expect? that were all sex talk or when they're in good mood. all those praise and compliments are just enough to feel you good about yourself for a bit and then they'll come destroying it. you stare at the view through the window. the night's particularly beautiful and peaceful except the place you're in and you're already missing the comfort of your bed.
you take a sip from your cup. a girl gave it you earlier saying that it's a special concoction that's only made at this parties. unsure you took it. not wanting to show ungratefulness to someone whose only been polite to you and she seems nice. you cringe slightly at the taste and the burning of the liquid as it flows down your throat. coughing you bring down the cup, not used to drinking.
your first time being a party, your eyes wander how your peers lost their selves in the influence of alcohol. some where dancing and mingling. talking like they were friends and you caught of others taking their business upstairs. you were kind of jealous how everyone are the life of the party and you sit here in your misery. you continue to observe everyone and you caught gojo. it's impossible to miss his tall stature and his white hair standing in the crowd. a petite woman is linked to him. her thin arms are wrapped around his neck and it was clear what they were doing. there they stood in the crowd. kissing.
“satoru.” gojo was taking a swig of his drink when a girl approached him. calling his name like they were lovers but it was more like an ex-fling. never had a relationship with her. she was only a temporary fun. “ah, sar—ah, sayuri.” he almost curses at himself. sayuri playfully pouts at him and there it is, the batting of eyelashes. “that's mean, satoru. you already forgot me.” her lips puckers before placing a hand in his chest. if this was a another party of gojo and he really liked this girl. he would have taken her upstairs. he caught you in the corner. you were like a child in awe at the people in this house. gojo almost chuckles at your cute antics but suppressed it and then a cruel idea pops in his mind. “missed me?” he asks sayuri and there was no answer needed as he crashes his lips to sayuri. his sight never leaving yours and when you caught him. he watch as your eyes widens, you lower your head in embarrassment before chugging that drink in your cup in one swig. he smirks in the kiss as he watches you wiped your tears away. he always liked making you cry.
you should have ditched this stupid party, even it means getting punished by those again. you were hurt. they always like to torture you. listen as they tell you how worthless and unlovable you are while they keep girls who are clearly not you by their side. those girls were perfectly fit for them to be seen in public and you were there for them to humiliate you. with your head lowered, you stifled a sob. wiping your tears with your hands shaking. they kept flowing and you kept messily wiping them and with that you slowly made your way outside. discreetly making your way through the door and you almost laugh. you were a nobody. you're not made for pretty things and this goddamn outfit you wore only added to your misery. you never felt beautiful and it looks ugly on you. wrapped a sausage with a different and it will still look the same.
no one noticed you leaving except for suguru's watchful gaze.
suguru finds his friend making out with a girl he definitely doesn't remember. suguru slaps his back and satoru broke the kiss. wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and ignores the girl he was just making out seconds ago. suguru points the door where you left earlier. you're really looking for trouble and with that they left following you.
sayuri was stunned being shoved aside again. she was angry. how the fuck did you get those two's attention especially gojo's? she's beautiful. she's thin. academically excelling and you, a fat nobody bitch easily made those two fall for you. she knows they were just playing at you and sayuri could take it but being shoved again by satoru isn't what she expected tonight. she's going to be satoru's bride. it was decided from the start and satoru knows it. their fathers friends since their college days had made a decision to marry their son and daughter before they were even born and she did everything she can just to have satoru's attention but why can't she even get to look at her without her trying. it's your fault. it's your fucking fault! you deserve to die. you're fucking stupid for accepting that drink like you're a fucking saint and now, maybe you'll rethink your choices of making those your own and satoru will only have his eyes for her and only her.
weird. why are your hands sweating? it's cold. freezing cold. you know this temperature at night is normal but why are you freezing cold. hah, your vision's starting to get funny too. where there always stars in the sky? ahh, i want to go home. i wonder if akira's still awake. i didn't told her that i was going away tonight. my eyes hurt. you were crying. this was your thoughts as you walked away.
it was to easy to catch you with their long strides. satoru grabs your flabby arm angrily. “we told you, you don't leave without us. do you really want to get punished, (y/n)-chan?” his voice snarky as he digs his nails in your arms. it hurts. it really must really hurt but you're suddenly numb to feel anything. you just stare at him in confusion and then you hear voices. they were calling them to get back.
gojo scowls at them. your knees buckled and you sat in the ground. geto tsked. “we're going back to you later.” he says and they left you there and there were loud cheers. you lay there in the ground. numb and your vision fades away.
you blinked as you stare in the nothingness. that's what you last remembered. they left you there and you hoped you died. you can't take another bullshit of what they put you through. the tears continuously flows from your eyes and your blanket is wet with tears. haibara puts a comforting hand in your shoulder and you bursted crying again. this was the real kindness you felt since the accident. they didn't blame you. they only stayed and made sure you were resting enough. stranger they maybe or an acquaintance. you would never forget this kindness from them.
days. nights. you stayed in the hospital until you were cleared. you made nothing of what happened to you. putting it in the records as an allergic reaction in which the hospital agreed. just like that even when you're in the brink of death of what happened to you. if you took the procedure for assault. they would be guilty but it was days old now and bruises are left in your skin as nothing but reminders of the humiliation of what they did to you.
for now, you're going to cry. cry until there's nothing left to cry for.
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Hi there!
I'd like to request something for the Laios party x reader where reader licks rocks like how archaeologists sometimes do to determine if it's a rock or a fossil. They just won't stop licking stuff. One moment you are just having a chat and walking side by side and the next reader grabs a rock and licks it. How would they react to their crush licking things that are certainly not food?
“stop licking the damn thing!”
…ft! touden party x gn! reader, platonic izutsumi & reader
…tags! fluff, some crack, headcanon format, grimm doesn't know shit about rocks
…wc! 342 ; 400 ; 405 ; 344 ; 303 = 1794
…notes! this ask enraptured me i had to complete it posthaste. i’m not an expert in archeology or geology, but i hope you enjoy!
Laios
“Ooh, can I have a lick?”
His ass does NOT give a fuck.
You could do anything and he wouldn’t be fazed I’m dead serious.
Honestly, once you do it in front of him he’d steer the conversation towards your study and how you figure out each time what is a rock and what is a fossil.
He may not fully take in all the information you give him. This isn’t a topic he’s admittedly too interested in.
Honestly he’d probably take up some of your advice and see if he tastes monster he can figure out certain things about it. Considering most monsters are made of raw meat, he has to be held back by your fellow partymates.
Someone (Chilchuck) usually has to encourage you to not “enable his behaviours.”
Overall, Laios simply does not judge! He’s open and welcoming, and will even take part in your study with you!
(It’s an added bonus that he really likes how you explain things to him…)
Almost like an eager dog, Laios leans over your shoulder to look at the stone in your hand. Prepared to explain yourself, like usual, you take a breath. “May I?” he interrupts you. You still for a second. Does he mean…? You slowly lift the rock up to the taller man behind you. You don’t have any words as he leans down to give a small lick. You’re almost flattered from how open he is to it. At the taste, Laios’ eyebrows furrow, and he seems to seriously try to dissect the flavour. He hums and tilts his head to you. “Salty?” “Yeah,” you reply, slowly growing a bit more comfortable as you get an excuse to talk about your study, “so that means this rock might contain evaporite minerals.” Laios smiles slightly, leaning back to his full height to converse with you in a more casual position. “Which are?” Your conversation continues, with Laios taking mental notes that he’ll hopefully remember for later next time he comes across a monster. Maybe if you find a gargoyle…
Marcille
Sorry she is so judgemental.
You are so lucky she likes you or else she’ll loudly give her opinion on how gross it is.
Well, that is until she learns the context as to why.
She’ll still be a little bit unsure, wondering if it’s proper conduct at all.
Marcille is trying her best, she really is, but you can’t just end a conversation so suddenly because you saw a rock, licked it in front of her, and said “hm… sedimentary.”
She wonders every day what she did to deserve such an… interesting taste in crushes.
Though, like all things, give Marcille some time and she’ll warm up to your habits a bit more. It may even be that she’ll be wondering about her study of the dungeon, running her hand along the wall, and thinking that she could call out to you to taste the wall and tell her the material.
She may not try out the method herself, but she’ll at least tolerate how you do it. There’s a science behind it, after all…
Marcille stares as you lick your lips and hum to yourself. Her mouth is a thin line and she’s trying her best not to come out with a disapproving comment. “Any… interesting findings…?” She stiffly asks instead, gripping Ambrosia as if you’ll try licking her to figure out the levels of Mana too. You can never be too cautious, even if she is only made out of wood. You smile at Marcille, either blissfully unaware of her austerity or pretending to be. You hold up the stone in your hand and outline something with your finger. “I think if we break this, we might find some fossils inside it. You can keep it for your research if you want.” Marcille’s ears perk up slightly at that. “For… me?” She asks aloud, as if there’s anyone else who’d be interested in dungeon rocks. As soon as she processes it she’s flushed and avoiding eye contact. “I mean, this is your field of study, not mine! I couldn’t possibly…” But you take her hands in your own, and place the fossil in her palm. Marcille’s breath hitches when you take her fingers and fold them over the stone. “I trust you to come up with something.” You beam at the elf, and she thinks that she might just have to take a chance in your skills.
Chilchuck
Not exactly open to it, not entirely critical about it either…
…But you will get a bit of a look whenever you do it.
He might be more the kind to make sure you aren’t outright doing it at stupid moments. You better not get any ideas looking at those statues!
Sometimes you’ll be about to hold the stone up to your mouth, and right when your tongue is about to touch it, you’ll hear Chilchuck sigh a “don’t.”
Honestly this guy is treating you like a dog with something it shouldn’t have in its mouth. Don’t worry, worrying and fretting is how he shows his love.
Even if he doesn’t like admitting to it…
If you try to explain how licking things helps in your study, Chil is inclined to raise his eyebrow and say that your field must be full of weirdos.
Then again, he’s the one who likes you so maybe he shouldn’t be too harsh…
He’s willing to let you do what you need to do but that doesn’t mean you’re free from his scathing commentary.
Crouched down, you analyse some rock in front of you. It stands out a fair bit from most of the other geodes down here. What could it be…? You lean in, your tongue grazing the stone slightly, and you lick. The tip of your tongue familiarises itself with the taste. Maybe metamorphic…? “Are you serious?” You freeze at the sound of Chilchuck’s boyish voice. On your hands and knees licking rocks isn’t exactly the ideal position to be judged in, even as you turn to look at the half-foot, arms crossed. “Senshi is in the middle of cooking, no need to resort to eating rocks.” You roll your eyes. You’re used to how Chilchuck treats your study at this point. “I was just curious.” Chilchuck scoffs, walking up to pull you by the back of your collar up onto your feet again, which you do with some coercion. “Yeah sure,” he says, “just wanna confirm you haven’t completely lost your marbles yet.” You look up at him, and squint. Holding back a laugh, you mutter, “was that…?” “No, it wasn’t a dad joke,” Chilchuck sighs, leaving you to your devices again. “Just don’t do anything stupid when no one’s watching.” He hopes even as you giggle and confirm, you won’t notice the bright blush blooming on Chilchuck’s cheeks and tips of his ears. How embarrassing…
Senshi
Also winning the dgaf war I fear.
He’d watch you lick some of the rocks you had picked out from your travels while resting.
It comes as no surprise that it then crosses his mind if the flavour changes when cooked, which he asks if he can do with some of your selection.
You can use your imagination on how Marcille and Chilchuck reacted when told that today’s dinner is … just rocks.
(Laios is disappointed that it isn’t any cool monster rocks.)
One delightful montage later, and ‘tis finished! Since they are for your research, Senshi insists you have the first bite.
Crunch… and oh, such unique flavours!
You gush to Senshi about how this is a major breakthrough in how different minerals react to cooking conditions, and he gives you his observations too.
Honestly, just sort of wholesome bonding!
“Aye, this one cooked easily, while this one took plenty more time.” You nod eagerly as you watch Senshi point to two different stones. “That’s because one is an igneous rock, which is magmatic. The other is a sedimentary rock, which carries different minerals from lakes and oceans. Separation in cooking must have resulted in different reactions! I wonder how different metamorphic rocks would react…” As you mumble to yourself, Senshi happily continues his meal-making, occasionally responding back to you with hums and comments about what else each observed in his experimentation. Even when you had finished up your meal entirely, you thanked Senshi with the widest grin on your face. He couldn��t help but be just a little flattered when you go on to joke that you should bring him home with you so he can help with your research. In return, Senshi listens to you, and hangs on your every word as you explain your findings to him. Even if not too nutritious of a meal, the minerals from the rocks provide some calcium and other such buffs! And well… If he can keep that happiness prolonged with his cooking, then he’s doing a very good job providing for you indeed!
Izutsumi
“Why are you eating rocks? Looks gross.”
Make way for the #1 hater…
Izutsumi refuses to listen to any such rationalities you make about your study or why you lick rocks (even though she’s the one who asked), she’s still finding it icky and weird.
You’d have to fight fire with fire when it comes to her, you’ll question why she does some habits she does in return – such as licking her hand.
She’ll look at you like you’re stupid, before telling you that it’s a way for her to clean herself and notice if there’s anything caught in her fur.
“Ah, so like how I would lick rocks to identify anything embedded in them too!”
…How dare you try to rationalise yourself with her own logic, heathen.
Jail for reader. Jail for 1000 years.
She’s not one to so readily accept other people’s weird quirks, but eventually she has to find that she’ll look stupid if she doesn’t… It’s a bit of a dirty scheme, but it works.
“Come on, Izu, just give it a try! I promise it just tastes like water.” “What kinda water?!” She shoots back. You pause. “W…Water?” This is how the argument between whether or not water has a flavour comes to be. Izutsumi insists that some water tastes icky while others taste nice. You have to explain that this pure water simply doesn’t have a taste. She doesn’t believe you. In fact, Izutsumi makes you give the sedimentary stone another taste before affirming, it just tastes like water. She’s about to grab your shoulders and shake you. What kind of water?! It takes plenty of encouragement and an immediate failsafe orange juice Senshi squeezed out for her to ‘get rid of’ the taste when you get Izutsumi to taste the stone. She still hasn’t forgiven you…
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belly piercing — r. cameron
pairing: bf!rafe x fem!reader
context: you got a belly button piercing and rafe sees it for the first time.
words: 652
warnings: fluff, mention of smut
it was a bright and sunny day when rafe convinced you to take a ride in topper's new boat with him, topper, and kelce.
you had recently gotten your belly button pierced and hadn't told rafe about it yet, so you quickly threw on one of his oversized shirts over your bikini before meeting them outside.
"hey, pretty girl," he holds a hand out to you when you reach the end of the dock to help you step into the boat.
"hey, y/n," kelce and topper both greet you as you join them, topper at the steering wheel, and kelce sipping on a bottle of beer.
"hey guys," you throw them a smile, as rafe wraps an arm around your waist and gives you a peck on the lips.
topper steers the boat away from the dock and starts heading out towards the marsh.
—
topper had anchored the boat to a stop in the middle of the marsh half an hour ago, so you were all now chilling under the sun.
you were perched on a lounge chair on the opposite side of the boat's deck from rafe, topper, and kelce, who were sitting on the L-shaped couch, sipping on their beers, and talking about some girl kelce was trying to get with, while you read your summer romance book.
all three guys had lost their shirts some time around noon when the sun reached its peak, and now that it was beating down hard and causing sweat beads to scatter across your skin, you consider taking off rafe's oversized shirt to just sit in your bikini.
you contemplate it for a second, unsure of what rafe might think about your newly pierced navel, but after persuading yourself that he was probably too distracted talking to topper and kelce to even notice it, you hop up from the lounge chair to pull his shirt over your head.
little did you know, he watched your every move from the moment you stood up, his eyes trailing over your body as you took his shirt off, the diamond encrusted ring in your belly button reflecting the sunshine and immediately catching his eye.
a smirk comes across his lips as he stood up to walk over to you in the middle of topper's sentence, and sat down at the edge of your lounge chair, facing you.
it didn't take you long to notice exactly what he was staring at, as he pulled his bottom lip in between his teeth.
a newfound confidence washes over you when you realize that the look on his face meant that he was loving the new piece of jewelry on your body. "you like it?"
he tilts his head up at you, his piercing blue eyes twinkling as he reached out to grab the back of your thighs and pull you closer to him, your navel directly in front of his face. "it's sexy, baby." he glances at it again, bringing a finger up to play with it. "does it hurt?"
"it's a little sore, but nothing too bad," you tell him, your hands tangling in his hair as he tilts his head up to look at you again.
"so it wouldn't hurt if you rode me?" he kinks an eyebrow at you and pulls you into his lap so you're straddling him, your thighs on either side of his legs.
"is that something you'd like?" you tease, his face inches away from yours now.
"very much," he nods, placing his lips on yours as his hands on your lower back pushed your body closer to his.
"hey lovebirds!" kelce calls out to the two of you, and you both snap your head towards him and topper on the couch.
"get a room," topper adds, sipping his beer.
"jump off the boat and go for a swim then," rafe tells them, causing you to snicker. "give us ten minutes."
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