#unrealistic expectation
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Ngl, it's an actual goal for a guy to just pick me up, throw me over his shoulder, and take me away.
#hurricane hailey#personal#me#my face#hailey's thoughts#he'd have to be real strong#jk id need to be smaller#unrealistic expectation
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"If you cared you'd remember..." You underripe flounder! Haven't you been adequately informed of the well documented fact that I have sufficient ADHD to disable a small village?
Should I hold you to a standard of comparable realistic expectation?
If you cared you'd be able to adequately predict the future, providing me with the winning number of the required lottery systems to make it possible for me to receive sufficient funds to hire a fucking secretary to operate in place of my unreliable memory.
There, now we're even.
You get me my executive function replacement staff and I'll be able to "remember" on demand by consulting them.
If you're unwilling to do so, or unable as it's quite obviously an unrealistic demand, perhaps you'd be amenable to lowering your expectations down to where my ability ends as well.
If not, I hope you find soggy pickles in your shoes every time you put them on from this day forth and until the end of fucking time.
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Facebook should be banned
Admittedly, social networking sites are now a frequent form of communication. Everyone uses social networks to communicate and interact with one another, and "Facebook" is one of them. It is the oldest social network still in use today among kids, teenagers, and adults. People were ecstatic when Facebook was released because it allowed them to connect with their friends and family regardless of distance.
Using social networks is really popular these days. Everybody uses social media in large amounts across all apps and websites. No matter who they are—students, teachers, staff members, managers, etc.—they are all entangled in the web of social media. Since these networks provide a wealth of information, they also have considerable drawbacks, particularly for developing youngsters.
In this blog article, we will talk about Facebook and how it harms children, as well as why it should be outlawed.
The harmful effects of using Facebook
Facebook, as we are all aware, allow people to broaden their horizons in terms of knowledge and perspectives, but it also has several drawbacks. Among them are:
Unhealthy sleep patterns
A person's mind is typically diverted and kept occupied when using Facebook at night by activities like chatting with friends, watching videos, looking up interests, etc. Nowadays, individuals check their phones just before going to bed. Their sleep schedule is disrupted by this habit, which keeps them engrossed in the online world. However, looking at social media in bed can reduce the amount of time they spend sleeping and make them feel unrefreshed the next day.
Depression and anxiety
Individuals who use social networking sites like Facebook become so immersed in the virtual world that they neglect to spend time with their loved ones. And sometimes, when they are unable to communicate with their internet buddies for whatever reason, they feel depressed and anxious. It can adversely affect their mental health, leading to heightened anxiety or depression symptoms.
Cyberbullying
When teenagers connect online, they adapt to a different set of social norms than when they communicate with their mentors in person. Due to the anonymity that they have online and their freedom to do so without being retaliated against, they are frequently more abrasive or negative on social media. Apart from that, some youngsters blackmail their friends or colleagues, using erotic evidence or images to coerce the production of more erotic content, sensual benefits, or money.
Unrealistic expectation
Facebook influencers share the best aspects of their lives with the world. Millions of their admirers see perfection in them and believe their lives to be faultless. The ideal lifestyle inspires viewers to wonder why their own lives aren't as fulfilling. This unrealistic expectation can lead to misunderstandings, friction, frustration, and more.
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Facebook "ruins the academic development of students"
The frequent usage of Facebook distracts students' thoughts and undermines their creative thinking skills. They talk to their buddies constantly, even though they are neglecting their academic progress. In addition, it throws off time management and alters students' regular habits of writing, reading, and paying attention to finish academic tasks. The following examples show how Facebook harms students' ability to succeed in school.
Facebook users usually develop an addiction to checking the site periodically, which causes them to pay less attention to their academics and lowers their grades.
Students copy their friends' assignments without applying critical thought because of this social networking site.
More time spent on Facebook causes pupils to spend less time on educational activities, which has an impact on their school performance.
Moreover, Facebook usage causes learners to have bad sleep, low body image, eye fatigue, and more.
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Why should Facebook be banned?
There are several reasons for prohibiting Facebook, as it not only affects the academic performance of students but also harms them in more negative ways. The use of Facebook can have detrimental psychological repercussions, such as emotions of sexual jealousy, tension, and loss of focus, as well as social media addiction that can result in drug consumption. Here are some reasons that indicate why Facebook should be banned.
Lack of privacy
Facebook is one of the most popular social networking sites, with over a billion users. The sharing of personal information by the network's designers has been the subject of various scandals. According to reports, Facebook sells user data to specific businesses. The network developers claim that members contributed their data, which is not private. This implies that practically anyone can utilize the personal information they find online.
Ruins relationship
As Facebook offers the opportunity to make new friends, it also shatters existing connections at the same time. Some people could be drawn to the extravagant lifestyles of others because they used to upload phony images, films, or reels. Such individuals get dependent on these things and force themselves to form meaningless connections without even realizing that their bad connections can degrade the previous ones.
Increases fake fame
Facebook gives its users a fake impression of success. People addicted to social media platforms often feel they are loved as they have a huge fan following. But this kind of popularity and acceptability are unreal in reality. This makes people feel bad about themselves, which results in them losing their sense of determination.
Conclusion
In the end, it is determined that Facebook has many drawbacks that warrant its prohibition. Since we live in a technological age, social media is quite important. However, it is also true that children are the world's future, and if they participate in the social sphere in this way, it will be exceedingly challenging for them to accomplish their intended objectives. Therefore, parents and instructors should be cautious with their students and limit their time on Facebook.
In addition, those who use social networking sites carelessly are requested to stop and use them responsibly, because using social media unnecessarily is just a waste of time. And remember, once the time is gone, it will never come back. So, save your time to save your future!
#facebook#social network#social media#addiction#harmful effect#cyberbullying#online gaming#stress#anxiety#unrealistic expectation#students#limited access
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Feeling Stuck in Life? Practicing Ways to Get Going Again https://is.gd/OWcyvb #ffol #factsoflife #relationship #love #relationshipgoals #makeuptips #beauty #beautytips #coffeelover #fashion
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Keep hearing people say maribug keep asking adricat if he's ok and he keep saying he's ok instead of telling her his problem but I don't remember it happened more than once in s4 in Rockettear but even then the circumstances of that episode did warrant the "nothing" answer he gave her unless he want to tell her that "nino tell me you let nino and alya know each other identity" which will reveal adricat identity. So when else did she ask? about the thing in hack-san, I think another credit goes to alya since she's the one who bring the topic to maribug who seems to be blissfully unaware that her leaving without telling adeicat that she send subtitute would be a problem.
I didn't get into this side of things in my other post because it was long and I wanted to focus on why Chat Noir's behavior was so frustrating, but this ask brings up the other big reason why the season four conflict was such a frustrating and terribly written plot line. Specifically, the part of your ask where you point out that Maribug seems blissfully unaware that her actions are having a negative impact on Chat Noir until someone points it out to her.
Yes, she is presented as blissfully unaware of this and every other interpersonal conflict we're given in season four. Your ask treats this as a failing on Maribug's part as if she should have obviously realized that she was in the wrong, but that's the whole problem. Telling kids - telling anyone really - that they should just magically know what others need is a frankly terrible life lesson as that's just not how the world works. You cannot just assume that everyone will have the same view of the world as you do and instantly pick up on the same issues as you do. That is the path to easily avoidable frustration and conflict. It also teaches people to assume that their view of the world is inherently correct when that is rarely the case. We often don't know the whole story and the other person's point of view may end up being equally or even more valid. This issue is extremely present in season four as Marinette has legitimate reasons to behave the way she does, which I'll get into in a bit.
If Marinette were written as feeling guilty about how she was treating Chat Noir, then this would be a different story. She'd be way more in the wrong and would shoulder a much greater portion of the blame. But as is? She has no idea that she's doing anything wrong. And until someone takes the time to tell her that her actions are causing harm, she is going to continue causing harm because she has no idea that she's causing harm.
In fact, I'd argue that the Alya thing in Hack San is a point in Maribug's favor. Throughout the episode, we see Marinette sending Alya messages on ways to be a good partner to Chat Noir, proving that she does in fact care about him. And then, as soon as Alya says, "You need to talk to Chat Noir," what does Maribug do?
She goes and talks to Chat Noir, giving him a pretty good apology for the problem she now knows she caused. Because, shockingly, Maribug doesn't actually want to hurt her partner. She also clearly cares about his feelings, making me want to take the season four conflict and tear it into itty bitty pieces because what is the conflict even supposed to be when you write shit like this?
I want to briefly step away from Miraculous and talk about this issue in a broader context via this YouTube short:
This short is from a Vietnamese woman who moved to Germany. Her YouTube channel is about her experiences there, including things like the short above which goes into the differences between what it means to be a dinner guest in Vietnam and what it means to be a dinner guest in Germany. In Vietnam, it's apparently standard for the guests to cook dinner with you where as, in Germany, you're expected to have the meal ready when the guests arrive, making this a situation where it's super easy to come across as rude just by doing what you think is normal.
Society is relatively aware that these types of culture clashes are a thing, but you don't have to be from different cultures to have these types of situations. Every person has their own unique needs and ideas of what "normal" is. The culture they were raised in will affect this, but so will their family, their personal needs, and many other factors. Two people can be raised on the same street and wind up with wildly different world views even though they supposedly share a culture. This is extra true when you add in compounding factors like neurodiversity, which is why it's an exercise in futility to say, "But Maribug should have realized..."
Well, she clearly didn't. And you can't change that she didn't realize whatever you're mad about. All you can do is have someone tell her what she's doing wrong. If she then continues the behavior, go ahead and judge away. But if she immediately corrects it like she did in Hack San? Doesn't that just prove that she truly didn't know that Chat Noir was hurting and would have probably fixed all of his problems if someone just pointed them out to her?
This is only exacerbated by the fact that Marinette's behavior in season four is largely unchanged from her behavior in previous seasons. The only major change is that she revealed her identity to Alya, but as soon as that's pointed out as a problem, she course corrects with an apology. After that, she thinks that everything is okay because why wouldn't she? Chat Noir said it was fine and everything else has been business as usual.
Bringing temp heroes into help as needed? That's been going on since season two. Having these additional members has been vital in multiple battles and there have been plenty of times where Chat Noir took a background role to the temp hero of the day like in Sapotis, Rena Rouge's season two debut. So why would Maribug suddenly think that this dynamic is a problem when it's been working fine for so long? We even had a whole episode about how Chat Noir was still needed in spite of the new heroes back in season three! Or, at least, I think that was Desperada's message? This show is shockingly bad at giving clear lessons.
Keeping guardian knowledge from Chat Noir? That's also been going on since season two and was even treated as a conflict that supposedly got resolved in the episode Syren which was the episode that ended with Master Fu coming to the mansion to talk to Adrien after everything was over.
When I watched that episode, I assumed this meant that Chat Noir was going to be more involved in things like picking the temp heroes. I actually thought this was how we were going to get Queen Bee because I knew she was going to be a thing, but it made no sense for Marinette to pick Chloe for a miraculous. Of course, I was wrong. Nothing changed after Syren. Chat Noir remained nothing more than the comic relief while Ladybug got all the insider info.
To be clear, I think that was a terrible move writing wise, but it doesn't change the fact that this is what they went with. This is the established dynamic. I can't even say that Alya learning Marinette's secret led to something new. She's just taken Marinette's old role while Marinette has taken on Master Fu's old role. This show loves it's status quo and Chat Noir has been at least tolerant of that status quo since Syren, so it's not surprising that Maribug doesn't register that this is a thing that should change and no one bothers to point it out to her even though she has a mentor in Tikki (and Su Han, I guess?) and a confidant in Alya and a whole slew of Kwamis who could also provide insight if they were allowed to do that sort of thing. (Sass and Wayzz were robbed of mentor roles.) Additional blame goes to Plagg because he should absolutely have told Adrien to talk to Ladybug. What is the point of giving these characters mentors who never mentor? It's aggravating in the extreme.
To circle back to the first part of your ask, outside of Hack San and Rocketear, I don't think there are any times when Ladybug invites feedback from Chat Noir unless you want to give credit to the end of Kuro Neko:
Cat Noir: (lands next to her) I've been a really temperamental kitty, m'lady. I didn't realize how much trouble I'd make for you by giving back my Miraculous. Ladybug: (sits closer to him) Just because I don't need you all the time doesn't mean that I don't need you at all, Cat Noir. No one could ever replace you.
Which isn't Maribug inviting him to tell her what's up, but she is clearly willing to listen to him and reassure him, further backing up my point about this conflict being some of the worst writing I've ever had to suffer through. If Maribug always fixes the issue as soon as she learns about it, you are not writing a situation where she's clearly in the wrong. You are writing an easily solved communication issue where she gets blamed for something she clearly doesn't realize she's doing wrong and it is so frustrating!!! I feel so bad for her. The next episode is Penalteam, btw, which starts the battle with this gem:
Ladybug: (laughs) Nice scare tactics, but it's not gonna work. Cat Noir and I are the best at soccer! Cat Noir: (Whispers to Ladybug) I don't know a thing about soccer M'lady. Maybe it's time to call the real team?
And basically just spends the whole episode making Chat Noir seems like a worthless partner while Maribug tries her best to make him - and everyone else - feel special.
Oh, and the episode before Kuro Neko? Well, it's technically Ephemeral, but that got magically overwritten so let's go one further back and we get to Dearest Family, which ends with this:
Cat Noir: (grabs a golden paper crown on the coffee table) Since I'm the king, (wears the crown on his head) would you be my queen, Ladybug? Ladybug: With pleasure, kitty cat! Tradition is tradition!
Oh yes, these two are in such conflict and Maribug does nothing to validate Chat Noir. He's in pain every episode and she's just totally oblivious to it.
If that was what they wrote, then I'd probably agree that we needed more instances of her asking if Chat Noir was okay. But it's not what they wrote. If you look through the list of season four episodes, you'll find that less than half of them deal with the supposed conflict of the season (by my count, only 8 of the 24 episodes before the final actually showcase the conflict and they are not in a logical order in terms of escalation as I tried to demonstrate above). The rest of the episodes flat out ignore it or even straight up work against the conflict like when Ladybug says this to Chat Noir in Guilttrip: "I probably don't tell you this enough, but I couldn't do this without you. And it'd be a lot less fun too."
Seriously, what even is this season? What is the conflict supposed to be? Because it sure as shit isn't Maribug undervaluing Chat Noir, if memory servers, season four sees her validate him more times than any other season. And it isn't her guiltily hiding things from him like so many fanfics claim because we have multiple points of evidence that prove that she's completely oblivious that there even is a conflict. So what conflict are the writers actually trying to write?
What's even more baffling is that none of this logically leads to the loss at the end of the season:
Maribug's new secrets didn't lead to her downfall. The only reason she lost was because of the secret that's always been there - a fact that's never revealed to her - and a freaking evil twin! So why did it matter that Maribug was keeping secrets? This is made even worse by season five maintaining all of the secrets, once again begging the question of what lesson were we trying to teach here???
Chat Noir wasn't needed for the final fight of the season, Maribug only needed the powers of a few of the temp heroes to win, a baffling ending to a season whose focus was Chat Noir feeling unimportant. You could scrap that conflict entirely and the ending would not change. In fact....
Adrien quitting to be nothing more than a good little boy who obeys his father would have actually saved the world from eventually being rewritten. If you think about it, the season four final actually punishes Adrien for being defiant. So does season five as, if Chat Noir had quit, his father would still be alive. I thought this show was supposed to be a romcom, not a tragedy. Why is Adrien being punished for being a hero? Is this supposed to be karma for lying to Ladybug with the whole Catwalker thing?
This shit is why I say I'm a writing salt, character sugar blog. I can't get mad at the characters when they're in such a nonsense story where things never logically tie together. They all deserve so much better.
None of this is meant to imply that ignorance is a blanket excuse for hurting others. Nor is it meant to imply that you have to forgive someone who hurt you just because they didn't mean to. There's a ton of nuance around these topics. But season four acknowledges none of that nuance while creating a situation that desperately needed nuance because there was no clear right and wrong here. Should Maribug work to be more aware of others feelings? Sure, but that journey can only start after she's made aware of her faults and no one ever points them out to her. Does Chat Noir need to work on clearly communicating his needs? Desperately, but no one is teaching him that lesson so he remains a terrible communicator who suffers in silence. What impressively bad writing.
#ml writing critical#ml writing salt#adrien deserves better#marinette deserves better#kuro neko salt#my queendom for some good character arcs#and good story arcs#there's just so much squandered potential here#ml fandom salt#ml fandom critical#Adding those tags because I am sick of people holding Marinette to unrealistic expectations#This was long so I didn't add this part of the rant but:#It's important to remember how much we know as an audience vs what Maribug knows#Adrichat is really good at putting up a front that everything is fine#And Marinette knows nothing about his homelife when he's Chat Noir#Plus the show has made this kids kinda terrible at understanding Adrien's home life
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IS IT REALLY A RELATIONSHIP WORTH STARTING IF EXPLOSIONS DON’T HAPPEN IN THE BACKGROUND
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Me, trying to pay attention to a conversation between characters that's probably vital to the plot:
The characters having the conversation:
#Unfair honesty#Just a super unrealistic expectation#Like yeah something something Salo something announcement something shimmer?#Okay but Golden Goddess and Ethereal Catgirl#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane league of legends#arcane lest#mel medarda
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I’m convinced that people who hate Mabel have a) never watched the show and/or b) don’t have siblings. Because until they encountered Bill Cipher for the first time, there was nothing to suggest Dipper’s obsession with the journals was more important or valid than Mabel just wanted to have a normal summer with a whirlwind romance. And even after incident with the portal Dipper and Ford actively keep everything secret from Mabel and Stan so she has no idea of the stakes or what Bill is capable of. Add to that that her dreams of the future were all suddenly crumbling around her all at once, and it is perfectly reasonable if not expected that she would fall for an immortal chaos demon’s tricks.
Also, most of the stuff involving the journal that goes wrong is Dipper’s fault but he still pretends like he and Mabel are in it together. And those of you who are siblings know that Mabel takes it extremely well. Like if I had accidentally sold my body as a puppet to a demon and the only way I could ask my sibling for help was through a sock puppet, I would expect them to help, but only after they spent a good half hour laughing and making fun of me with the additional consequence would be that any time I ask them for a small favor in the future, they would remind me that they were the one to save me from my stupid mistake, so no, they won’t pass me the salt.
(Also, can we just take a moment to see the giant double standards when it comes to the romances that Dipper and Mabel’s have. When Mabel pursues a romantic people treat it as irrelevant and getting in the way of the plot even when it doesn’t. But when Dipper tries to win Wendy’s affection, people expect Mabel to drop everything, sacrifice her pet, mess with time travel to help set up a scenario which Dipper can win a carnival game as a flex.)
#gravity falls#gravity falls mabel#gravity falls dipper#bill cipher#ford pines#grunkle ford#stanley pines#grunkle stan#mabel pines#dipper pines#Mabel Pines is my favorite character in the show#she’s so optimistic and upbeat but still so realistic#like if the apocalypse happened and I was offered to live in a world of my creation I’d probably say yes#especially if I was Mabel’s age#she’s just a girl#also I find it weird that adults will watch kids shows and then be surprised when the kids act like kids#like if you’re not the target audience for a show then don’t get upset when the show caters to a different type of audience#especially in kids shows where you can expect things to go unrealistically well because it’s fun and happy#that’s my favorite part about watching kids shows is that kindness and good will win over selfishness and evil#if I wanted to see a gritty struggle for survival against a dystopian government I’d exist in real life for a moment
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Whenever Branch invites Poppy to sing and dance with Brozone he doesn't grab her hand just like that, he asks for permission first. He knows how much she wants it but he asks for consent. It's always "will you join me" not "you will join me". He really treats her like the queen she is 😭
#fictional men giving me unrealistic expectations#i just want what they have but it's impossible to have a relationship so perfect#i want ten more of these movies#trolls band together#Broppy#branch#poppy#trolls poppy#trolls branch#trolls 3
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Did anyone actually enjoy the end of Arcane though? 😟 I feel like the only takes I've seen are utter, vitriolic criticism or disappointed indifference. I actively *enjoyed* the ending and thought it wrapped up pretty nicely.
It's feelin' lonely out here 😔
#arcane#arcane s2#arcane season 2#it's not without flaws but i think a lot of people had some crazy unrealistic expectations for how this show would end#esp considering its tone#idk#I'm bummed :(( i liked it and i just feel like all im seeing is negativity
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Girls don’t want boys. Girls want to find a lost key that unlocks a hidden door to an abandoned garden surrounded by a tall stone wall, isolated from everyone else where they can tend it and bring it back to life with their own two muddy hands.
#seriously is this too much to ask?#i can’t be the only one#I’m still salty this hasn’t happened to me yet#frances hodgeson burnette gave me unrealistic life expectations#the secret garden
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yknow, for all those people who use “3x wdc winner vs 3x race winner” as an insult, i don’t think you realise that that’s not exactly an insult.
yes, it’s true that max is a 3x wdc winner, that’s why he’s one of the best. that’s why he’s one of the most respected drivers. he’s got the talent, and he’s got the fast car.
and yes, it’s also true that lando is a 3x race winner, that’s because he just got a fast car. he’s learning. he’s adapting. he’s made mistakes, on and off track, but he’s learning. and the fact that in his first year of getting a fast car, he’s p2 in a wdc is amazing.
max has had a fast car for a long time. he has adapted to that as well. he knows his weaknesses and strengths, and he learns from it and uses it to his advantage. he’s had that time to learn to be in a fast car and win races. i’m not discrediting him. i’m saying that, as every other human on earth, he learned from his mistakes and he’s doing extremely well.
lando got a fast car this year. not even the whole season, in fact. he hasn’t had time to adapt to having a fast car after driving a mid field car for five and a half years. he’s still in that process of adapting. he’s making mistakes, but he will learn from them. he said he needed to work on his qualifying last year, and this year, he’s got 7 poles in total. he’s amongst the few mclaren drivers who have gotten more than 5 poles in one season. that’s an achievement of its own. he knows that he needs to work on his starts. you best believe that next year, he’ll be so much better at it.
he knows that this season he made some mistakes off track as well. but, as compared to the start of the season and now, he’s gotten much more mature, and much better at using his words correctly. the current situation about him saying it was luck was taken completely out of context. but, haters have a small brain, and a low attention span, so they won’t watch the entire interview.
max has had way more experience than lando has. to use that “3x wdc winner vs 3x race winner” for a duo where one has significantly more experience than other, not just in a fast car, but also in f1 overall, seems stupid to me.
max won his first race in 2016. and then, he won his first wdc in 2021. sure, lando has a fast car now, but to put an unrealistic expectation on him to be on par with the greatest f1 drivers almost immediately after he wins his first race is a little too much.
this constant need of people to belittle these drivers, whether its lando or max or literally any other driver, is so surprising to me, because none of yall would even be able to drive an f1 car in clean air for one lap, let alone a full race. especially, not at a speed that they do.
these are my opinions. if you don’t agree, please fuck right off. if you send me hate, i will block you. i don’t give a fuck. if you have something to add or have a counter argument, you’re free to do so respectfully.
#f1#formula 1#lando norris#formula one#ln4#max verstappen#im actually scared to add the max verstappen tag#cause i know that the verstannies will come for my neck#i’d write about unrealistic expectations that fans have imposed on other drivers as well#but i need to do more research#lando and max are my favs#so i know more about them
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This is what it feels like every time a new SMP has streamers I like
#mod talk#This is mostly /j I will NOT be covering Cobblemon much#I love Pokemon but I'd actually like to dial things back#I don't try to watch every streamer or ever single thing in every server to know what's going on anymore#I did that for QSMP and it was fun! But it burned me out badly#For Arkanis I watched a few people but wound up just watching Pac towards the end#and for Realm I only watch like 3 - 4 people and even then only sometimes (which is pretty evident based on the long lapse in clip posting)#I like keeping things diverse content-wise#and I like including lots of different streamers in clips but this blog was never meant to be an update account#And that's sorta what it turned into during QSMP#But that's not the intention and I don't want folks to look at RA with that expectation because good god is that unrealistic#I am one person. With a 9 - 5 job might I add#Tbh I don't think anyone expects this of Royal Archivist but in case you do – here's a heads up#Your friendly neighborhood archivist is tired and taking a back seat on things#✌️#Tbh I don't think this needs an announcement which is why I'm putting this in the tags of a silly meme post#But I'd also like to nip this in the bud in case people start asking why I don't do clips of ____ server or ____ streamer#I don't watch a ton of people to begin with#I do feel bad about the Bluesky community though I really tried my best to crosspost stuff#But it wound up being a hassle trying to trim things down and make the file size tiny so I gave up because it was just so time-consuming#Anyways#TLDR: Estoy cansado jefe
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im not the biggest alhaitham/kaveh shipper (because im a rare pair ho) but it seems to me that in alhaitham/kaveh getting-together fics tend to be... unequal.
the beautiful thing about alhaitham and kaveh is that they're both equally right and equally wrong and equally dicks about it. but the writers for alhaitham/kaveh much more frequently seem to give alhaitham the burden change (the burden of the character flaw) instead of kaveh.
in any good character arc, the main character has a fatal flaw or misconception, and by the end of that arc they have addressed that flaw in some definitive way. scrooge was a scrooge and learned that being that way was detrimental; merlin from finding nemo was overprotective to a fault and had to learn that he couldn't (and shouldn't) control everything and to let go; the wolf from little red riding hood learns that you should stop while you're ahead.
stories centering around romance tend to lean heavily on character arcs, which makes sense. and since romance generally requires two individuals to be vulnerable and open and emotional with each other, it makes double sense that alhaitham/kaveh authors zoom straight into alhaitham's lack of emotional vulnerability.
this bothers me.
in society, individuals are expected to experience and present emotions in a specific way. if someone dies, you cry. if someone smiles at you, you smile back. if you're at a party, you're supposed to be having fun. if you don't do these things, you're seen as impolite at best and a inhuman freak at worst. when these behaviors are frequent it's often viewed as emotional immaturity, or a lack of ability to feel at all. the inability or lack of willingness to conform to societies emotional expectations of you is seen as a flaw and a reason for exclusion.
alhaitham is canonically disliked and avoided for being the way he is. he prefers it this way, but that doesn't mean the people perpetuating this avoidance are in the right. they are the societal pressure to conform that alhaitham blows off. alhaitham could be the way he is for a lot of reasons: avoidant attachment style, trauma, following someone else's example (eg. his grandmother), or just his base personality. it doesn't MATTER. he is the way he is. kaveh having to accept that should be part of the story.
putting the burden of the fatal flaw on alhaitham, making the way alhaitham treats kaveh and the people around him the problem, feels invalidating. it implies heavily that alhaitham's way of interfacing with the world, alhaitham's very SELF, is incorrect. my suggestion is to flip a larger portion of that burden onto kaveh. kaveh ��� character 👏 arcs 👏
some examples/recommendations:
- make kaveh project his insecurities onto other people but especially onto alhaitham; he's overly reliant on other people for his own self worth, and he perceives alhaitham's lack of positive feedback as a direct reflection of how alhaitham feels about him. but learns along the way that alhaitham doesn't hate him, kaveh's actual struggle is with hating himself and being unable to his own self as worthy of love. maybe throw in how you are responsible for your own recovery, other people can help but you can't rely on them to carry you through self actualization.
- or, kaveh tries to make alhaitham behave more like a "normal" person, to be more pleasant and emotive and forthcoming, and then realizes he's in the wrong for trying to make alhaitham into something he's not, possibly for all the wrong reasons (not because he likes alhaitham better like that, but bc society says that's healthier and a better/more conforming way to be)
- or you could go ahead make alhaitham's issues the main problem but they're too complicated to overcome in a short period of time, so kaveh has to accept alhaitham is doing his best in his own way and not push for unrealistic and unhealthy changes. he could alter his own behavior to give alhaitham space and time and a safe place to land.
that got sappy so it's past time for me to dip out. go forth and ship things; but maybe consider letting alhaitham be a rude stone-faced bastard if he wants to be.
#genshin#alhaitham#kaveh#alhaitham x kaveh#kaveh x alhaitham#kavetham#haikaveh#fanfiction#fandom discussion#meta post#i finally used a readmore are you proud of me#as an avoidant attachment girlie alhaitham is my oshi#pls just allow him to not emote#let the man vibe#i feel certain there must be a real word for the concept of... socially enforced emotional conformity#unrealistic societal expectations and for your inner world which is none of their business#but i sure couldn't find it#if anyone has any words for this pls let me know it's kind of killing me#anyway#i get so mad when the avoidant attachment coded character is forced into (independently by themselves) the arc of:#i realize now that my way of interfacing with people is wrong and bad. yay! i will change that immediately for the big emotional finale#like! with what therapy!!#and why is THEIR world view the incorrect one!!#i have seen fics where it was all a big misunderstanding and actually alhaitham loves kaveh deeply#and kaveh just has to get over his insecurities and understand alhaitham's love language or whatever#and sure. good effort.#but i feel like a lot of those fics aren't very accurate to alhaitham's character#they're retrofitting alhaitham's core personality to better suit the traditional romance narrative#i also think part of the problem is that alhaitham is a pov that's divorced from regular emotionally well adjusted people#and it's difficult to understand or write povs that are drastically different from your own
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Please tell me you sometimes get scared that you'll end up truly lonely because adults are usually closest with their significant other and their children and there seems to be very little time and space for deep friendships but I don't want a significant other or children so who will I have, please tell me I'm not the only one, I-
Girl I’ve been having a crisis about this all day
#Watching my little pony at 10 years old gave me the most unrealistic expectations#Like I do see myself marrying someone and having kids one day but that will def not be until my late 20s or early 30s at least#And even when I do I don’t want my friendships to take a backseat bc of it
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on the one hand Moshang is considered a incredibly romantic and wholesome love story by demon standards is funny and I love it I also do think the idea that for an ice demon specifically Mobei-jun is a cringe sap and overly expressive and romantic to the point of being a freak to other demons is just much chucklery. I mean, this man out here looking like an emotionally constipated rock is actually on so many laxatives he's been shitting a stream of emotional pebbles for the past decade is just so silly. In general, I just think Mobei-jun is funniest when he is in fact just weird by virtually all metrics but nobody can or will say anything.
#svsss#svsss shitpost#scumbag system#scum villain self saving system#scum villain#moshang#mobei jun#shang qinghua#The idea that he's like a bleeding heart desperate romantic eager for love and devotion to a point that demonkind agrees the only one#weirder is their emperor but like that guy is half human on his mother's side and all that so what's his excuse.#idk#i just think it be funny#he's the perfect man for bs logic#give this man unrealistic expectations about getting beat up back by his husband
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