#unlike everyone else here
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These aren't full ref sheets but I was trying to take some clear pictures of Hephaistos for later art reasons and then got side tracked doing all of the Pandaemonium bosses so here they are in order. Also for anyone following who doesn't play FFXIV and knows it as the catgirl game, enjoy this instead? VISUAL SPOILERS obviously.
Asphodelos
Warder of the Condemned: Erichthonios
Mythic Creation: The Hippokampos
Mythic Creation: The Phoinix
(+ familiars)
Hemitheos: Hesperos
(+ sexy fanfic redesign by Nemjiji)
To be brutally honest I never really liked either of these designs compared to every other Hemitheos we get, I think the really brutal black and red of the Phoinix is weakened by gold accents, but I still am always down for gay vampire surf rock. The Savage version kind of looks like Ultimalius as well if you've played XVI.
Abyssos
Mythic Creation: Proto-Carbuncle
Hrgrhhgrhrgrh
Hemitheos: Hegemone
^ My favourite detail on this is you can see the parasite's outlines in her robes and in her legs, then right through the eye holes on the mask to wrap around the torso. I'm convinced this version of Hegemone is functionally an ant being piloted by a cordyceps infection.
Hemitheos: Agdistis
She's very big
Perfect Imperfection: Hephaistos
I'm probably biased by Abyssos being the first raid I was there for day of release but these really are all fantastic. It's also when the story abandons all pretense of not being (at least partly) about family abuse and is loudly using the body horror and shackle motifs to talk about that. It's great. Hephaistos specifically is constantly bulging and twisting in and out of different forms like a highly unstable chimera and the more I look at these the more I notice parts that just should not be there. He's giving everything.
As for the Savage design It's a hard thing to rate as such but my favourite part is the veins that grow down from the eyeholes in his mask like bloody tears.
Thanks Abyssos I love you
Anabaseios
Mythic Creation: Kokytos
Dæmoniac Dungeon: Pandæmonium
It's really hard to communicate how huge this nasty tumor crab I zoomed out as far as physically possible in the game engine and subsequently ended up at a goofy angle staring up his nose.
Ephemeral Justice: Themis
Best boy. The double ended lance and second pair of arms are fantastic for this character.
Theos: Athena
In.. almost every final fantasy adventure you're fighting the real villain not at the very end but a little beforehand, the big iconic end boss is often more a metaphorical figure representing everything wrong with that first person's ideals. Athena cut out the middle man and became her own JENOVA.
I do like the moth angel, especially the hollow body full of dubious orbs, but with her eyes closed all the time it gives off the impression of this not even being the true body but some kind of anglerfish lure in the shape of a fairy... which might be true because this exists:
I really really love her twitchy anemone feelers and how the moth body ends up grafted to the rest of it waist down.
Anyway there's the gang I did not specifically intend for this to be design reviews I just wanted to have clear photos because when you actually see them in game there's other things to focus on. In hindsight I can appreciate more the theming of each tier and then the series as a whole, but my only (extremely obvious) observation for now is that every character Athena had a personal hold over is decorated in chains somehow and so I should have seen the Hegemone thing coming lmao. Heph and Aggy are still my favourites I don't think that's changing any time soon. I'm also noticing that Anabaseios is now just old enough for random DF parties to fuck up severely and I find that fun so I'm going to go fight the crab mansion now.
#ffxiv#endwalker spoilers#pandaemonium#ff14#let him speak#dante plays catboy simulator#Erich's transformation is unlike everyone else here he can just do that normally#none of the body horror is present that's just what he looks like when he's not a little guy in a robe#but I do find it really fascinating that you get with these Ancient characters a second symbolic body#and his is completely wrapped up in chains there's a hole in his heart#and the little plinth on his head where his dad's mask sits#Heph's designs are all very unnatural though and I think the reason I love it so much is just how much all of it screams pain and misery#Not an outwardly depressive character but just look at this dude#fun in comparison to athena who has made herself into a glowing white angel with three different halos and one has a crown#it's such an egotistical design lmao
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furries would not be where they are today if not for dragoneer. even before he created FA, he was carving out spaces where the tiny niche that were furries could feel safe and have fun. one dude. you can trace practically every modern furry community back to one individual guy and the relentless work he did. given how tied to the lgbt+ community furries have become, i sincerely hope his name is one that becomes immortalized in queer history. what a fucking legacy.
#dragoneer#furaffinity#furries#i've always been more furry adjacent just dipping my toes in here and there#and still i wouldn't have made so many friends and have so many cherished memories#without dragoneer making a space for them#i'm angry like everyone else that our healthcare system not just failed him but neglected him#i hope his family sues the ever living shit out of that hospital for the gross incompetence#i hope whatever doctor sent him home with a suspected case of a godawful bacterial infection with no antibiotics#has to pay them for the rest of their life#i know its unlikely but one can hope#this system is a fucking joke
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our first guest appearance: Hatsune Miku
#danganronpa despair time#drdt#fuit gumy art#original situation#arturo giles#veronika grebenshchikova#featuring the one and only#hatsune miku#to celebrate 39 situations in the blog!#i had to give miku her arm sleeves so consequently she has arms unlike everyone else#oh and to the person who asked if arturo was going to be stuck on the ceiling fan forever;#fortunately no. he has been put back down on ground level#here he is. still intact!
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#this question is very hard for me to answer so obviously I have to torment everyone else with it#cause like. like I can really see the potential in either answer. both are feasible#I will say. most realistically. to me. edwin first charles harder#because I think…..I think the reasoning behind the other way around usually tends to be about how edwin absolutely was slower to bond and#open up in general whereas charles hit the ground fucking running#but i don’t think that particularly applies to their romantic relationship#if you mean ‘fell for’ in a general sense rather than a romantic one then yes 100%#but that’s not what im talking about here#I have a few different reasons but generally I think edwin fell first because like… the way he attached himself to charles and accepted him#as his person and etc is so unlike him to do with literally anyone- especially at the point where they first met/the first years they knew#each other. charles just seems to have hit him as something very very special and irreplaceable quite quickly for him to open up the way he#did and change and flourish into a fully realized person because of how safe and worthy charles made him feel#he took to charles with an unusual amount of ease and trust and I think that says something about how charles struck his heart Early#whereas with charles… yes on one hand he did stay on the mortal plane largely because of edwin and absolutely would’ve been impacted by the#tender act of mercy that was edwin reading to him as he died so he wouldn’t be scared. that’s absolutely what got him to trust edwin and to#want to be with him and protect him and so on#but charles would still do that and be like that under intense platonic circumstances I think#but most importantly I just think charles fell harder. when he fell is less important to me here- more important is that by GOD that boy is#down so fucking bad and outright SAYS IT in so many ways that he doesn’t realize– the sheer amount he restates how he’s content so long as#he’s with edwin. how he doesn’t want to be anywhere where edwin can’t follow. would and Did go to hell and back for him. believes him#to be the kindest and most incredible person he’s ever met. prioritizes him above anything and everything. etc etc etc#that’s not to say edwin doesn’t feel a similar amount of devotion– but charles just. really loves him with his whole person. loves him as a#fact of his existence and a piece of his very soul#idk man. it just feels like he is so incredibly smitten and he doesn’t even know it.#like I said though I can see both options and give reasons for both options so this question EATS at me I GENUINELY don’t have a super#strong feeling either is absolutely correct. it’s so difficult to answer they’re both so smitten and have such a history and GRAHHHH#payneland#dead boy detectives#rambling#polls
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Went to Michaels again, you know we had to do it to em
#michaels#cotl#lambert….#i had to make sure that they didn’t just leave the word CULT there and some random mom or someone thinks we’re actually promoting a cult#because… we like being in michaels…#and we dont wanna be banned or some shit#from silly cult game mention#lambert posts#mel talks#cult of the lamb alters#Narinder straight up fucking hated Michaels#but he’s getting used to shit so it’s to be expected ig#he hates extreme colors for some reason#complains about it burning his eyes#this reminds me that i have to post that uhh alter thing so everyone that actually reads these knows who we are and shit#because NO ONE knows who i am#I am Mel#…Im not even gonna try and… talk the rest of this shit out#im prolly gonna post it tonight or tomorrow too#cause I think I have to update it to explain Nari probably..#since Lambert will keep this guy in front with everyone else#and maybe one day—Narinder will (unlikely) post something himself on here!#won’t that be fun!#sweating…#ok i gotta go#cult of the lamb lambert#lamb cult of the lamb#cult of the lamb#doodles#doodlings
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i am actually so tired of the way westerners treat eastern europeans
#fair warning for. a very very long ramble and rant in the tags. apologies#westerner or russian. no other option#westerner because the only thought they ever have is 'but they had universal housing so if you oppose ussr you oppose that'#(which is stupid becuse you can believe in that WITHOUT WANTING LIKE 6 COUNTRIES TO BE FORCED TO BE RULED OVER BY RUSSIA)#(SORRY FOR WANTING TO LIVE IN MY COUNTRY WITH MY HISTORY AND MY CULTURE AND NOT RUSSIA!!) (poland was a sattelite state but GOD)#or russian because they have a victim complex and are convinced that they deserve to rule over the entire damn world#'well you had universal housing so you had it easy' right yeah. okay. forget about like. everything else that happened#to eastern europeans during that time#forget about the things that are STILL issues all these years later not only in poland but like the more eastern countries too#its not about. the fact that the houses 'didnt have 3 bedrooms and a jacuzzi' in them. you DUMB SACK OF SHIT#god sorry. sorry. i also know so very little but like god damn i fucking live here. i didnt sit thru all that modern history#for some dumbfuck to say that 'ohhh only rich and american middle class people are happy the ussr was dissolved'#'oooh the dissolving of the ussr was illegal and the countries within it actually liked being there'#im just so fucking tired man i need to. i need to start killing people#and this is all not to mention that theyll say this stupid shit and then deny eastern europeans the things they actually did that were good#FUCK french people for trying to claim maria skłodowska. fuck americans for trying to claim the witcher as their own fantasy world#fuck the way the west is allowed to claim and destroy eastern european culture without any consequence because we dont matter enough#vaguely related but ill throw this in here since anyone finding it is unlikely and im scared of having this opinion#i think one underappreciated aspect of DE (which might be underappreciated because its not actually there and im stupid)#is that its pro-communist while still also giving some criticism to how it was handled and acknowledging that its still not perfect#which makes the writers much better communists than any self-proclaimed one ive ever met in my life who just worships the idea#perhaps its because the writers of the game were not white upper middle-class americans living in the suburbs. among other things#idk de is a game for people far smarter than me and i only played it once and im sure anyone who played it well can clock me as a bad perso#horrible horrible person even which is why im scared of mentioning it. but its an interesting thing. to me#the main thing is that im just not. im not far left enough i suppose. i agree communism in theory is a great idea. as far as i know it#(which isnt very far)#but chances of implementing it correctly in a way that doesnt take away from peoples happiness in other areas is. low. very low#i wrote a short essay about how utopias are inherently contradictory ideas once it wasnt very deep or good but like#you cant have universal happiness without restricting certain freedoms. and when those freedoms are resticted not everyone#will be happy. and then theyre unhappy they will have to be somehow removed or ignored
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terminal car brain is so scary because you'll be talking to someone and they'll casually imply that they sometimes get the urge to hit people (pedestrians/cyclists) with their cars and act like this is just something every driver feels on occasion. like it horrifies me for real like how on earth does someone allow themselves to feel that way. you should be forced to travel only by hopping on one foot for the rest of time
#same with the ppl here who are like yeah i break the rules of the road but im smart and good at driving so it's fine!!#unlike everyone ELSE on the road who's the real problem
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decided to leave my job and i'm gonna fr gonna cryyyyy
#literally can't work with my new boss bc i can't trust her#she went to the head of the department with complaints abt me without ever speaking to me or giving me any indication she was unhappy#and various other reasons im not happy w management and the school in general#HOWEVER#i love the kids sm and im gonna miss them and worry abt them 😭😭😭😭#im literally scared for some of them bc it feels like the other teachers have no empathy for some of my favorite kids#one of them who is so so sweet and when he cries i'm the girst to comfort him bc everyone else thinks he needs to toughen up 😭#also my new boss sucks so so bad and is gonna be such a bad influence on him and all the other kids#and my main co teacher said she's gonna quit if i do so i cant even beg her to look out for my babies and take care of them 😭💔#and it would be unprofessional to mention any concerns to the parents but genuinely some of the kids would be better off elsewhere#like im actually worried about it#i dont want some of the really sweet sensitive kids to lose their sweetness bc they're being treated unkindly#and the worst bullies and spoiled kids are the ones the teachers dote on#so it encourages some of the sweet ones to act out for attention#anyway 💔#i really do need to go tho#and i'm sure i'll love the kids at my new job#but im so sadddd#also its unlikely i can find a well paying job w this age group even tho i love this age group#its basically impossible not to get attached to them at this age and i get to pick them up and hold and cuddle them and stuff#and you cant really do that with the older kids sadly#literally on the verge of tears even seriously thinking abt leaving#things have been p bad for a while due to management but i never seriously considered leaving bc i love the kids so much#but i literally can't see a future here#and my new boss clearly hates me and im worried she's going to try to get me fired#she already made up a bunch of lies about me and its only been three weeks#anyway i only make 15 an hour so hopefully i'll at least get more somewhere else and i know i'll still love the kids#its just really hard#which is why i've stayed this long#i was p unhappy before my new boss even started bc of the way they treated my old boss
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i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.
you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.
and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts
#how do you miss me when you won't talk to me? how do you like me so much and then go to just. not?#how did i let you in when i try so hard not to let people do that because i know that once they get past the walls all i'll be left with#is the idea of them rotting and withering inside me. polluting the space i create to keep myself safe.#why does everyone leave? leave in silence too. leaving behind so many questions and so many words engraved in my brain#i am so tired of *grieving* when those i grieve are still alive and well and thriving and i'm reminded that it's versions of myself#that i'm grieving instead. how do you grieve yourself? how do you not fucking fall apart over it?#just. fucking talk to me. don't make it be true that all i'll ever be is nothingness and the memory of someone you liked once#but never never never liked enough#i'm so so cold already. i'm a shell. i want to be warm again but it always leaves me so hollow and hurting#i grieve the dio who was warm. i grieve them i miss them i am so so angry that he had to leave. to hide. with no way out#i'm happy for you. i'm happy you're happy. but you're no better than anyone else and it makes me want to run away again#but i have nowhere else to run and no one else to be. and it's so fucked that it doesn't matter who i am i'll never be enough#for someone to just. stay. to see me and to stay. to hear me and to sit and listen and just. just fucking stay.#maybe i'm not worth staying for. maybe there's nothing to know nothing to hear nothing to see nothing to listen to nothing to find#maybe all i'll ever get is one/two good months paid for with a lifetime of grief. and i'm at the point where i don't want the good months#anymore with you or anyone else who tears down these walls with affection that is so endlessly addictive and leaves me yearning.#on the off chance that it will keep the grief away too. but that's the thing about grief isn't it? it's here to stay. unlike you#god this is so fucked up and i'll delete this later but for now i just need to. let it out. poe said i should make a side blog for the grie#but poe's not there anymore. poe has stopped starting fires. so this goes on main until shame makes me take it down#blah#personal#not st
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The thing about Stranger Things being such a normie-ass mainstream show but being about outcasts is that you'll see a good ol' country boy in a John Deere cap and cowboy boots with a Stranger Things shirt, and...
Be honest with yourself, Dale. Your ass would not be in Hellfire. You'd be in the angry mob trying to kill kids.
#I do not live in a queer-friendly area.#Or an any-minoity-friendly area.#I actually saw this today and you know what else I saw?#A black girl nervously asking if we even HAD textured hair products because she didn't see many other black people since she moved here.#She prefaced her question with an apology because she 'didn't want to offend anyone'#Didn't want to OFFEND anyone? For needing different hair products? Are you shitting me?#Point is I'd bet dollars to doughnuts that guy voted for Trump and his ass would NOT BE IN HELLFIRE#Like even if I'm wrong--unlikely--about him being a Trump supporter I'm willing to bet Eddie would have made the same assumption I did#even if he TRIED to get into Hellfire.#But no. I fully believe he'd call it Satanic just like everyone else in a real situation.
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ass in the air on my hands and knees searching for link/allen (romantic platonic idgaf in this economy) fanwork i scoured the ao3 tag dry and 8 years of tumblr posts and now i am Two fists deep in pixiv, dodging projectiles of pathetic ai porn, desperately looking for crumbs. i’ve done it again folks i found a more or less dead fandom and got stuck on the niche pairing of the main character and the guy who debuted with a bowl cut and now there is nothing to be done but CRY LOUDLY and then (some time later) EQUIP PEN
#(through tears) BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD#fuckass niche as fuck pairings always nerf me for some reason i’ve got a thing for the…. the Unexpected. or the Unperceivdd#i just think there’s something so compelling about allen’s idealism in spite of the horrors he’s experienced contrasted with#link’s single mindedness in his devotion to reveiller or whomstever the fuck (can’t spell europe)#being as he is an orphan who has never had anyone else in his life#but then allen comes along and suddenly he’s forced to be in close quarters with another human being for a long ass time#and allen obviously hates it at first but they’re both Food Enjoyers and allen’s so. he’s so idealistic. he thinks he can save everyone#meanwhile link has never cared about anyone except his friends who all became third exorcists and cocked off + leveiller + now. now now#howard ‘i’m at war with myself’ link#HOWARD LINK HAS ONLY EVER AFFORDED HIMSELF TWO MERCIES#THE FIRST IS HIS FEELINGS OF LOYALTY TOWARDS REVEILLE#WHICH AT SOME POINT IN HIS EMPLOYMENT TRANSCENDED A MERE SENSE OF OBLIGATION#THE SECOND IS ALLEN WALKER#meanwhile allen’s never had anyone see him at his lowest so often on the pure basis of fuckass watch a dog a (mario voice) duty#the forced vulnerability into a genuine sense of concern but the lines are eternally blurred#throw in link’s transparency when kanda drags him out of dog zone and he’s like okay ya this is what i’m here to do#and allen’s unequivocal acceptance of him all the same#AND THE WAY HE BLUSHES WHEN ALLEN PINCHES HIS NOSE (7999 psychic damage sustained. critical hit!)#i like unlikely and difficult connections which require infinite energy and faith to sustain#i like what they’ve got going there#it compels the Fuck out of me#ok now that i’ve yapped this much i Must. i Must write. so write i will (later)#after (?) this comic and also my mom and i finish watching blossoms in adversity which . favorite chinese period drama ever fyi#ok good night i sleep#olio#gelmo
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some people on here care waaaay too much about what other people are doing, fan behaviour
#it's not a moral failing to be excited about a video game#or for a certain character or whatever#the way people get on here and write multiple paragraphs about how everyone else is stupid for not being exactly like them is so cringe#like the posts shitting on people for being excited for a romance companion or being too happy that veilguard is finally coming out#you're an adult fan on tumblr.com talking about video games be so fr you're not better than anyone else#if you do this you're unlikable + i hope your pc can't run the game#not directed at any beloved mutuals just some shit i've seen floating around#that being said if the shoe fits 🤷♀️
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Scar I am BEGGING you can you slap Dl!Scott across the face??? I think he needs that
****
#asks#trafficblr#Trust me I am constantly tempted to#/Oh sorry do you want me to hold their hands and tell them that they are smart and talented?/#/Do you want me to say that every other me is as good as me? Or that i feel so sorry about hurting poor Pearl feelings?/#/and you call me a liar/#/I might not like Martyn but I respect his win unlike everyone else here/#I am very tempted... More tempted each word you say
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Thing about small italian villages is that the didnt really have roads up until the 70's which of course leads to a massive amount of cousin marriage and inbreeding and while yes my particular own has its issues regarding that (3 major families (one of whom i am part of!!! Yay!!!) that all of the other families are related to, everyone there has bone/joint problems or some sort of schizofrenia) the neighboring one is worse as in they have one major family and the rest of the inhabitants are ppl who immigrated to have a quiet life in the mountain slopes and that by itself could be an extremely interesting study bcs everyone there kinda looks the same-ish and has a frankly insane amount of people with developmental disabilities for a population this small
#ok now that i have typed it out i realized it sounds mean and i want to earnestly say that i am not mocking them i just suck at tone#i do not think its something to be laughed at i just think the whole thing is uh. i wouldnt say tragic but really no one's fault#bcs again. if you live in the mountains where the main city is hard to reach bcs of poor road conditions#which leads to isolation and also extreme stigma against the village folk *of course* the village#will become more secluded and incestuous marriages will happen (aside from the obv economical factor#that a pre industrial reality would entrail)#its just. fascinating on a sociological and genetical level. esp since by when the roads were functional#and the village folk stigma had already gone away the whole 'we stay here we stay together we are better than anyone bcs they are envious#of us and we will continue inbreeding and any kids with severe disabilities born from it are actually Blessed because they are born from us#has already taken so much root it is now unlikely to be eradicated . the nature of italian villages is that every once in a while#someone reinvents blood purity and eugenetics lmao#anyways this whole incest thing is also the reason why i get frustrated about those books that have#the main characters go into small bigoted villages and either finding peace there or be horrified by its conservatives ideas#while never digging on the *why*. like yeah all this 'what happens in the village stays in the village and everyone else is an enemy'#but they never dig into why that mentality was born to begin with and how incest there#actively helps this mentality to continue on like you legit still have grandmas telling you to marry ur cousin#anw. i dont know what i was going for w this rant. it originated from knowing that my aunt turned local saint#was actually schizophrenic and was prone to paranoid attacks and mental breakdowns similar to mine#fun stuff!
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Watching Longmire and Barry showed up and yeah… idk what the story is but he looks very nice
#he’s also a dork#and a cutie#and tall as fucking shit you can see it more here#since everyone else isn’t huge#unlike modern warfare#Barry Sloane#Zach
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i am too mentally exhausted to even deal with this shit anymore with my mom and grandma and low key wish i'd go comatose for a few years to be left alone tbh
#had a clean up service come by to see the damage and give a quote on the estimate and my grandma wasnt having it#she got upset and started crying to them about she has only 1 daughter and is trying to help her and they're trying to tell her that keepin#all that junk isn't gonna be helping anyone especially my mom but she wasn't getting it and i said i'm not helping clean the junk that's#all around the house cuz i'm tired of it all and having to manage my emotions since i am for sure emtotionally stunted from my childhood#and have to deal with a schitzophrenic mom and an absent sister who's balls deep in denial while i'm struggling to find a job here#and my grandma always stressing me ot saying she's gonna kick me out isn't fucking helping here at all like she thinks it does#so when they left she spent all day sobbing on the phone how i'm a terrible granddaughter who wants to throw out good stuff#when i'm not gonna keep helping sell shit for my mom cuz my sister can do it as her family contribution since she did nothing since dad die#and the thing is i gave them all options on clearing shit out cuz i know this family by now and shit doesn't get tossed but it migrates#cuz i said months ago i can ask some friends if they could come down and help sort and declutter#grandma said no to that and said she'll kick me out if i do it and she didn't want to pay for my mom's shit to get moved into a storage uni#she leaves the clean up to my mom and i think the backyard got worse but she didn't call anyone to throw out the junk like she threatened t#so i call a fucking hoarders clean up service cuz that's what my family is on my mom's side at this point and the city will be called too#and she has this reaction cries all day and calls everyone to say i'm horrible and yells at me saying i'm the one killing her with stress#when she's already been doing that for months to herself when i'm just tired and possibly mildly depressed or something idk#i barely leave my room and don't go outside except to walk my dog but idk cuz my family's attittude was we don't go to doctors cuz#cuz they're for crazy people but of course it's gotta switch up for my mom and no one else and i'm just sick of it all#grandma doesn't accept free help and she won't accept help that i pay for myself with my money set aside for school so i'm done#unlike her when i say i'll do something i stick to it so i'm not doing shit anymore unless i can call a friend to help with this mess#it's gonna sound like such a horrible thing but i can't wait for my family to die so i can live in a clean home again and get help#like deep serious help cleaning and big time grief councelling cuz i barely had time to process my dad's death and being the one to find hi#and that was just this february like god i am going to need so much fucking therapy in my future it's almost rediculous#and probably say screw my mom's side and visit my dad's side a lot more since they seem to be the normal ones in this shit family tree#at least they're not stupid and leave junk everywhere where one neighbour getting sick of not being able to sit outside and enjoy their yar#without mountains of junk staring them right in the face and landing a notice from the city to clean up especially since#we have chainlink fences and at least 7 neighbours can see the backyard and everyone can see the front porch when passing by#i'm just tired of living in these suffocating households and even wanna file a report myself to kick them into gear#its horrible living like this and no one should live surrounded by junk and things they never use or even garbage
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