#unlearning that was very good for me right

[chron0ph0bia]

you parents constantly telling u the shit that you've been trying to unlearn surely is smth

[sandinmybed]

can i be fr for a minute?? sending abuse to people online for holding different views than you is not activism and in fact actively hurts your cause. most people are not extreme in their viewpoints, you can give them a new perspective if you're willing to spend some time explaining shit. if someone is saying something you disagree with and you rush in there to condescend to them and call them disgusting and subhuman and dont even TRY to explain calmly why their views are harmful, they're going to shut you out instantly and double down on their views.

most people are simply genuinely ignorant to the issues they're talking about - they just pick their views up from the news and the world around them and express opinions because that's what every person does. if you run in there and tell them they're scum for it, what then? if someone does that to you, are you going to think "maybe i should do some research" or are you going to think "this person is an asshole, im blocking them." a lot of you think you're activists and then refuse to do any kind of actual WORK to support your cause.

[rileys-battlecats]

i really gotta get better about listening to my own brain and needs when i'm making things. i've been working on a video and i'm almost finished (yippee!!), but drawing this One Specific Frame was giving me trouble. i could have just brute-forced my way through it and finalized the initial sketch, since it was relatively good enough. but instead i left it and took a day off from working on the project, let myself recharge, and came back to the sketch with fresh eyes today. and what do you know, my redrawn sketch today is WAY better! now, i can finalize that frame and be genuinely proud of it, instead of just powering through on something i was less than happy with.

i hadn't done any other art stuff that day when i couldn't get my sketches to look right, so letting myself stop and have a break from the project felt sort of "unearned" i guess. but it's just. what i needed! and the break did what i needed it to do; i was able to come back later and make something i could be proud of.

anyway i guess this is me saying that, if you're like me and have this weird morality-complex about letting yourself rest, it's ok to take breaks, even if you feel like you haven't "earned" one yet :)

[evilkitten3]

sasuke: u did nothing wrong

itachi: hey it's actually really fucking concerning that you think that. i was objectively a horrible brother and the fact that i loved you the whole time secretly doesn't change that. i did what i thought was right but that doesn't make it any less fucked up, and you definitely didn't deserve it. i failed to treat you like a person with your own thoughts and beliefs and instead tried to push my own agenda on you. i traumatized you more than anyone else, and i did most of it knowingly and purposefully. you don't owe me gratitude or forgiveness or anything else. just know that i love you no matter what and i hope you can find happiness in spite of what i did to you.

people with incredible reading comprehension just phenomenal abilities to comprehend the reading: why sassgay not gargle leaf balls

i always forget about this scene, where itachi refutes the fact that he made the right choice regarding the massacre.

(even though he still identifies as itachi of konohagakure because the will of fire i mean brainwashing is too strong)

no matter how much itachi loved sasuke, he manipulated him, just like how the village manipulated itachi. the fact is that the rot cycles back to konoha.

[oberthinkin]

Actin out for attention but getting my way instead of attention 

[lemonlover1110]

𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐥

Sukuna

Pairing: Sukuna x f!Reader

Summary: Sukuna's twins are miniature versions of himself which can only mean one thing: they're two little demons.

Warnings: MDNI, family content, fluff(?), dad!Sukuna, smut, oral sex (m. receiving), titjob, nipple play

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

Sukuna had to change a lot of things in his life when his twins came along. The man that never imagined he’d become a father, was lucky enough to knock up his girlfriend. Or wife, whatever he gets to call you now. One very unlucky lucky night he decided that protection was a stupid idea, but the universe got back at him to teach him a life lesson, and you ended up pregnant with two– Not one, but two babies. 

Sure, Sukuna loves his babies and all that shit which made it easier for him to change into a better person. He’s not a stellar parent or anything, and during the first year of their life he was struggling to figure it out but the job has gotten easier. He’d argue that the job is fun too, seeing the little shits form their own personalities or whatever is interesting. 

Though one could say that it’s only fun for Sukuna since the kids are turning out just like their father. For you, on the other hand, it is stressful. Having two children screaming just like their father isn���t exactly fun, not when you have to correct them. It was hilarious to watch Sukuna teach his nephew cuss words for the little guy to run around, yelling the atrocities (nearly giving his father a heart attack); it’s not fun when you’re in the mother’s shoes. 

“Fuck you-” “We don’t say that around here!” “Daddy says it!”

“Motherfucker!” “Watch your mouth!” “Daddy told me I can say it!”

It’s a never-ending correction in your home, and it doesn’t help that your husband doesn’t help you out. Sukuna kind of does his part by watching his mouth around the pair, but that’s not enough anymore. They’re almost six, it’s too late for them to unlearn certain words… or other behaviors. 

“Stop arguing you two!” You yell from the kitchen, hearing them bicker about something. They’re always arguing because one is mean to the other. Sukuna’s genes are too strong. Luckily for you, you were blessed with a girl and a boy so you don’t have to try again for another baby. You won’t have to repeat this.

“Ugly bastard!” Akane, your baby girl, yells. And you wish it was a moment where you got to think if you heard wrong because your baby girl would never say that, but she would. This one says it nearly daily.

“Akane, if I hear one more word out of you, girl! I swear–” You’re cut off by your husband, startling you as he hugs you from behind. He’s not listening, or well, he is and he doesn’t want you to correct the girl.

“Aren’t you just so proud of her?” He sounds elated, knowing his daughter sounds just like him. If only you could share that sentiment. You push him away and focus on finishing lunch for the little rascals. 

“My girl friends invited me out, and guess what? You’re taking over tonight.” You tell him, and Sukuna’s eyes widen. You’ve never made that threat before– Usually when you go out, you take them along or drop them off at someone else’s place because you doubt Sukuna can handle them. The longest they’ve been alone has been an hour.

“Someone will end up getting stabbed.” Is his answer, hoping that it’s enough to scare you into staying. Sukuna loves his babies, but he knows he can’t handle them. He made a grave mistake by molding them into mini versions of himself. Sukuna can’t control himself, how is he able to control two small Sukunas?

“And it’s probably going to be you if you don’t play your cards right. Good luck.” You answer, making it clear that you’re not staying home no matter what. You don’t acknowledge Sukuna as he begins to tell you the horrific sights that you might come home to. Sure, your kids are rowdy and a lot like their father but they won’t burn the house down… if you hide the matches.

“Akira! Akane! Come here!” You ignore him, calling your kids for their lunch. Sukuna sighs, rolling his eyes. 

They can’t be too bad…

“Hold his legs!” Akane yells to her brother while she pulls Sukuna’s hair. He doesn’t know what happened, he just fell asleep on the couch and woke up to his arms being restrained while one twin wipes something on his face. 

“What the fuck are you two doing?!” Sukuna raises his voice, rightfully so considering the position he’s in right now. He was warned, yet chose not to listen. Sukuna could kick the little shit that’s trying to tie him together but he won’t in fear that he might be too harsh and send the kid to the hospital. Oh, he hates them so much right now but any other time he’s willing to give up his life for them.

“We’re just playing.” Akira answers, and Sukuna could strangle one of the twins right at this moment– Too bad his hands are tied. How is this playing? Are they simulating a kidnapping or what?

“Untie me, now!” He orders, but his words go in one ear and out the other. He’s not mommy, he’s not uptight and lets them do whatever so this must be a joke.

“Quick, grab mommy’s makeup!” Akane yells, and Sukuna clenches his jaw. He’s trying to free himself, but they got him good. He needs to check what the kids are watching from now on because this is worrying for him.

“Akane, let me go before I get angry.” Sukuna threatens, but what can he possibly do when he’s tied up? 

“I got it!” Her twin comes into the living room with your makeup bag. Sukuna is squirming, trying his best to break free from his confinement but he can’t. Did they catch him while he was tying you up or what? No… He remembers locking the door. 

“If you two don’t let me free in this instant, I’ll make you pay!” Sukuna sounds intimidating, clearly angry at this little stunt. Unfortunately for him, they don’t take him seriously. They fear no one.

“You sound funny.” Akane laughs before pulling on his hair, which makes a cry escape his lips. Oh, he’d love this father thing if they were like you. This whole thing is getting annoying, but not only for him; the pair is getting tired of hearing their father cry and scream. “Akira, grab the tape, daddy is getting annoying.”

“What the fuck are you going to do?! I am your father, you two have to listen to me!” Sukuna is trying his best to break free before the twins tape his mouth and end up killing him. And by some miracle, just as they get their hands on the tape, the front door opens.

He prays that it’s you, ready to save him from the twins’ evil plan. It’s not you, but the next best thing. Sukuna doesn’t waste a second before yelling, “Jin! Stop them before they kill me!”

“What’s happening here?” His brother looks around confused. What did he just walk in on? He got a text from you to check in on his brother since Sukuna would be alone with the twins… and this happens. He sees his beloved nephew walk back with a roll of tape, and Jin picks him up from the ground. “What are you two doing to your dad?”

“They’re trying to kill me!” Sukuna yells, which the twins argue,

“We’re just playing!” Which makes a chuckle come from Jin. It isn’t funny– Well, maybe just a bit. It’s hilarious to see Sukuna get a taste of his own medicine.

“Now, you two, let your dad go.” Jin says, and at that moment they huff and puff. But they listen. He’s watching Sukuna’s expressions, and he stops the twins before they completely free him. “Stop. Go to your rooms.”

“What?! Don’t–” Before Sukuna can finish yelling, they’ve run away. They aren’t going to listen to him. Once they’re out of sight, Jin frees Sukuna and holds the man down, not trusting him enough to let him go.

“You’re not going to do anything to them, right?” Jin sounds as if he were Sukuna’s dad, which only pisses the man off more.

“The fuck am I going to do to them? I didn’t kick the little shit when he was tying my legs because I didn’t want to hurt him.” Sukuna makes a great point, but Jin wasn’t there to witness it. Right now he sees an angry man, and he wants to make sure Sukuna calms down before anything. “Why the hell are you here anyway?”

“Your wife called me to check up on you, and I came just in time.” Jin answers, sitting down beside Sukuna once he knows that his brother is calm enough. Sukuna wants to be mad at you for not trusting him enough to watch his own kids, but he also wants to thank you for saving him tonight. 

“Don’t tell her what you saw.” Sukuna quickly says. It’s more of a warning than a request. Sukuna takes a deep breath. He should be asking what the kids were going to do to him– It wasn’t going to be anything too bad, probably just put on some makeup on him or some other stupid trick. They knew he was going to say no if he asked, so they chose to tie him up. The thought isn’t too far fetched considering who their father is. What he’s thinking right now is,

“Why would they listen to you and not me?” Sukuna wonders, and Jin has an idea as to why. “I mean I’m terrifying, but you? You look like you catch jellyfish with a net and work at the Krusty Krab.”

“Ah, they’re into Spongebob now.” Jin can’t help but laugh. He won’t take the insults to heart since this has always been Sukuna. “I feel like they do find you scary, they just don’t think that you’ll do anything to them if they torment you.”

“What the fuck are you saying?” Sukuna isn’t in the mood for this. He can’t just wrap his head around this whole situation.

“You let them get away with a lot when it comes to you. You don’t let them get away with anything when it comes to their mother or other family.” Jin explains, which is valid reasoning but Sukuna rolls his eyes. That isn’t the answer he’s looking for, therefore he won’t accept it.

“Whatever you say. I’m going to check up on them before they flood the house.” Sukuna stands up from his seat, leaving his brother behind. The twins can’t be trusted for too long. 

Lo and behold, they found the matches. 

“You two came into my life as karma, huh?” Sukuna asks, before taking the matches from their grimy hands. “Akane, go annoy your uncle. Akira, you’re getting a bath and that’s final.”

“I thought you said I could bathe only once a week.” Akira points out the agreement they’ve had, but Sukuna has changed his mind. 

“I changed my mind when you and your sister did a kidnapping simulation with me. Plus, your mother says you stink and she doesn’t like you anymore so go to the tub.” Sukuna is not scared of making a little white lie to hurt his son’s feelings. It’s the least he could do.

“Mommy doesn’t what?” Akira’s eyes become watery, his bottom lip quivering at the thought of his mother not loving him anymore. Sukuna would feel a twinge of remorse any other night. 

“He’s lying, bubba.” Akane goes to his brother’s side to comfort him. She might be a little devil, but she has her soft spot. She hugs him tightly and Sukuna has to tear his eyes away from the sickly sweet scene. They won’t get to him. “You do stink but mommy loves you. She told us she loved us before leaving.”

“A lie she told you since she’s not coming back because you stink.” Sukuna isn’t going to stop, even when he hears his son cry. The boy pushes his sister away and runs to the bathroom to wash himself to make his mother come back. Hearing his own son cry is tough, but he’ll pat himself on the back later. 

“You’re next. Now go to your uncle, ask about Yuji or some shit.” Sukuna looks at his daughter, who is more resilient than her brother. She’s only five though, so he can find a way to get through to her with no issue. “Your birthday is coming up soon, huh? Guess I’ll–”

“I’m going!” She yells before Sukuna can finish his sentence, making a smirk come to his face. Smart girl.

He can handle them for the rest of the night, especially with Jin here.

When you come home, your little demons are sound asleep in their bedroom. You tuck them in, and admire the sight that you never see during the day. They almost look like they were sent straight from heaven. It’s a nice sight to come home too.

Your opinion changes when you enter your bedroom and find your husband throwing his clothes into a suitcase. You’ve noticed that over the past years he’s become increasingly dramatic. You let your presence be known as a chuckle escapes your lips, standing in the doorway.

“Is it because they tied you up?” You question, and a frown comes to his lips.

“I told Jin to not tell you. But yes.” He answers, and you step into the room. You shut the door behind you, locking the door just in case things escalate. “They don’t take me seriously, and I told you things wouldn’t go well if you left me alone with them but there you go, going out with your friends.”

“I can’t stay locked up forever taking care of them.” You respond, and he rolls his eyes.

“Leave them with Jin. They take him seriously.” Sukuna says, and you chuckle.

“Unpack your stuff, baby. Stop being so dramatic.” You tell him, heading over to the bathroom to get ready for bed. That’s not enough for him right now though. 

“I’m leaving and never coming back.” Sukuna sounds like a child, which is hilarious. Only those two can get that side out of him. He’ll continue no matter what you say, so you do the next best thing. You lift up your shirt, and his eyes widen for a moment before he tears them away.

“Your boobs aren’t going to work this time.” He claims, and you fix your shirt. He sucks his bottom lip between his teeth before sighing, “But they do help.”

“Come here, baby.” You walk over to him, wrapping your arms around him. Sukuna hugs you back, and he could sob (just for the dramatics).

“They’re so mean.” Sukuna’s head rests on your shoulder, as his hand travels under your shirt to squeeze your boob. “Can you make me feel better?”

“Can you–” You begin but before you can even finish, Sukuna pulls away and throws the suitcase on the ground. He’ll unpack later. You open your mouth to speak again but he grabs the back of your head and pulls you into a rough kiss. 

His tongue wanders around your mouth, his free hand going under your shirt once again. It’s an old trick, but every time you show him your breasts, he forgets anything and everything. You don’t do it when the matter is a serious issue, but you really can’t do much about the fact that your twins are straight from hell.

Sukuna sits down on the bed, lifting up your shirt, prompting you to take it off. Once it’s out of the way, his tongue licks up your body before giving your tits attention. He rolls his tongue around your nipple while his hand plays with the other one, pinching your nipple and squeezing your boob. You really get him, knowing the exact way to get him to calm down. He pulls away, and kisses between your breasts until he gets to the other tit. He switches to your other tit and entertains himself once again.

He’s having so much fun, his mouth preoccupied with you but there’s an uncomfortable sensation between his pants. He unlatches, looking up at you with lustful eyes. Your gaze falls on the tent in his pants, making you bite down your lip.

“Help me out.” He says, and you help him unbuckle out. You pull down his pants, freeing his cock from its confinement. You kneel down in front of him, a smirk on your lips. This is a great way to apologize.

You spit on his cock before your hand wraps around the base. You lower your head, tongue circling around the tip as your hand strokes his dick. You start off so painfully slow, too painful for Sukuna. You lower your head, taking as much of his dick as you can.

You slowly bob your head, hands wrapping around the park of his cock that is outside and stroking it for him. It’s like heaven for him, though he just wants to push your head down and force you to take all of his cock. You can take it like a good girl, right? He won’t take any risks tonight.

“You can take it all.” You lift your head, and Sukuna whines. You were barely even doing anything, why did you feel the need to stop? A spark appears on his eyes, a smirk coming to his face as you cup your tits. He judged too soon.

You put his cock between your chest, squeezing your cleavage together before moving it up and down his dick. Sukuna’s eyes nearly roll to the back of his head at the feeling of your tits squeezing around him. He grabs the back of your head, pulling back and telling you, “Open your fucking mouth.”

And without missing a beat, you obey, sticking your tongue out. He spits in your mouth, and you swallow immediately. This is the reason why you ended up with twins– You just do shit that makes him feel every inch of your body raw, a need. You’re so obedient and generous with him.

Your soft flesh between his cock is too much for him, and such a nice sight as he watches them jiggle. You should do this more often is all that he can think as your hands pick up speed. He’s rolling his hips, lightly moaning as his breath gets heavy. 

“Good job.” You hear, which tells you all that you need to know. He barely praises you unless he’s close.

“Cum for me, baby. Do it all over my tits.” You tell him, and he bites down his lips to not sound pathetic. Oh, he has to control himself tonight because you might end up with another child. He can’t have that. 

His hands grip the bed sheets as he finishes all over you. His cum covers your chest, all the way up to your neck. Your fingers swipes it, bringing it up to your lips simply for his entertainment, but he’s looking for something else in the nightstand.

He could die right now.

“Ran out of condoms, and I’m not risking anything.” He’s in so much pain as the words leave his lips, and you furrow your brows. Since when has this been an issue?

“You can pull out.” You remind him, but that isn’t cutting it for Sukuna.

“I said I’m not risking anything.” He couldn’t make it any clearer. Tonight was certainly… An experience to say the least.

“Can you at least eat me out?” You ask him, standing up from the ground. There’s no way you’re going unrewarded tonight.

“You have a vibrator, work it out.” He shrugs, and you glare at him. He’s pissed off with you again, leaving him with the twins was a horrible mistake on your part.

“You’re such a jerk.” You roll your eyes at him, and hearing him chuckle makes you want to hit him. You manage to restrain yourself, managing to mutter out a simple, “Fuck you.”

“Aw, they get it from you. How cute.” He says, which makes your palm lightly slap his forehead. “Hey! Maybe next time don’t leave me alone–”

“The vibrator is going to do a better job than you anyway.” You cut him off, going to the bathroom to clean yourself up… Getting all dirty and for what? 

“If you really want another pair, I’ll give them to you.” Sukuna stands up, following behind you to annoy you.

“Get a fucking vasectomy.” You respond, and you feel his arms wrap around you, stopping you from going any further. Of course he can’t leave you alone. “Sukuna, I’m going to shower.”

“I’ll help you.” 

[navyiera]

[requested] how would flirty!vi treat reader who is insecure of their thick thighs? (req pinned below)

all of you are perfect! keep that in mind. era loves y'all 💖 [also very short. Im having a block but i still wanted to do this incase any of you needed it. And please do not hesitate to send requests, I'm more than happy to write them! Or two vent to me. Im a good listener!]

Vi, Who Knows You Are Insecure About Your Thighs, But She Thinks They're Perfect. That you're perfect.

It starts like it always does—with you fidgeting. Hands gripping at the fabric of your shorts, tugging them lower like it'll change anything. Like it'll shrink the way your thighs press together when you sit, the way they spill over the edge of Vi’s bed just a little too much for your liking.

She sees it. She always sees it.

“Babe,” Vi murmurs from her spot beside you, where she’s been leaning back against the headboard, arms folded like she’s been waiting for this moment. And she has.

You refuse to look at her, but that doesn’t stop her from moving, doesn’t stop the way she shifts onto her knees, crowding into your space. Fingers slip beneath your chin, tilting your face toward hers. "What did I tell you about that?"

You open your mouth, but she beats you to it. "No hiding from me." Her voice gentle with a tinge of something you can't put a finger on. Assertiveness? Protectiveness? Or perhaps love.

It’s unfair, really, the way she says it like it’s a rule she expects you to follow, like the shape of you is something you should be flaunting rather than something to tuck away. But Vi doesn't just like your thighs—she worships them. She fixates.

And you know what’s coming next.

Her hands, rough and calloused, slide down your arms, then lower. She palms at the meat of your thigh, gripping, squeezing, before sinking her fingers in like she means to leave marks. Like she wants you to feel her there long after she’s gone.

A quiet sound escapes your lips, and she smirks. “See? Feels good, huh?”

You roll your eyes, shoving weakly at her shoulder, but she just laughs. It’s low, husky, the kind that sends heat curling up your spine. "Nah, you don't get it," Vi says, voice dipping as she leans in, forehead brushing yours. "These thighs, babe? They’re perfect. And not in some half-assed 'oh, you should love yourself' kinda way. I mean it. I need them."

She proves her point by ducking lower, pressing her face to them, mouth ghosting over your skin in something between reverence and hunger. And then she bites—just enough to make you twitch.

"Fuck, you drive me insane," she mutters, dragging her tongue over the spot she just claimed. "D'you know how much I think about these? How much I wanna be between them, under them, pinned 'til I can't fucking move?"

Your face burns. "Vi—"

"Mm-mm." She cuts you off, nosing at your inner thigh, voice thick with something raw. "You're gonna sit there and let me appreciate you. All of you. Especially this." Another squeeze, another kiss, her breath hot against your skin. "So, if you're still thinkin’ about hiding from me? You better unlearn that real quick."

And with the way she’s looking at you—like you’re something to be adored, to be devoured—you think maybe, just maybe, she’s right. (she is)

[againstme]

thank you for your response. i'm late with responding because i just got home about 2 hours ago from a very long day of group therapy, psychiatry, and regular therapy ;-;

i try to explain overstimulation (i was trying to explain this to my therapist at the end of my very long, stressful, draining, and overstimulating day that got to the point where i was just sitting at the table in the group room with ear defenders on with my head down and my arms around my head to block out light), the way it builds up, how draining it is to have no real break from it, and the way it's affecting me and my interactions with others and my functioning, but it's hard. the staff members here don't really get it. and it's too tiring to explain to them, and debating on whether or not to refer to myself as Autistic without having a diagnosis. and also the way that overstimulation is different from anxiety or depression, and that, no, i'm not feeling anxious or depressed, that it doesn't feel the same, and that these concepts and experiences are completely different.

despite all of this explanation on my part, and how tiring it is, it doesn't feel like i'm being understood. the lens that these people are seeing this from is completely different than mine. because most, if not all, of them are viewing it from a non-autistic / neurotypical point of view, not even taking into consideration the fact that some people might have a different experience or way of living.

it's kind of surprising, but also not really, that these people wouldn't have the insight to think outside of their narrow scope of view, even though they work in a field involving people with mental health issues, which is a form of neurodiversity, though they likely haven't had the inclination to dissect the definition of that term with that level of nuance. so, as a result, it's hard for me to even feel like i have the option to advocate for myself.

i said this to my therapist, an analogy for being burnt out, which is that it feels like i'm strapped into the passenger seat of a car which is flying down the highway, the tires are worn thin and shredding into pieces on the road, the brake has been cut, and there's a brick on the gas pedal.

hey, i have a question: do you have advice on how to manage autistic burnout when you’re in a situation where you can’t stop what you’re doing? i’m in a mental health residential right now, and i think i’ve been experiencing burnout that’s been building over time. the thing is, every day, we have 8 hours of group therapy, a mental health/AA/NA meeting to attend once we get home, chores, and a house meeting at the end of the evening.

so i feel like i’m constantly going and going, even though i feel extremely burnt out. i’ve been getting really drained, overstimulated way easier and quicker, getting headaches, not really being able to talk as much nearing the end of the day for group therapy, all that stuff.

i want to be able to take care of myself, but i can barely catch a break. i can’t ask to not go to group therapy, they won’t really let me not attend, so i can’t sit out. and i don’t have an official autism diagnosis either.

do you have any advice?

It is impossible to prevent or recover from burnout without reducing demand load and resting, often for an extensive period of time. Sometimes burnout recovery never happens at all. When we get burned out, our capacity to function is diminished, and there is no guarantee of it ever coming back.

It sounds like you're in a really overstimulating environment that is constantly busy and that you have very little control over your time and privacy, and that's causing you a lot of stress. I would speak to your care team about this to see if you can get some expectations waived. Burnout will almost certainly negatively impact your recovery progress so I hope they take this seriously. Unfortunately I put no trust in such institutions.

[callooopie]

Modern!Davos Blackwood headcannons (pt. Smut)

— NSFW edition—

It can’t be unlearned. I’ve known the warmth of your doorways — It Will Come Back // Hozier

I haven’t written NSFW in a bit ~3~. Bear with me while I try not to blush and cringe at my own writing T~T (also that new episode.. rip MY queen Rhaenys dude. It actually made me so bummed it ruined my night.) Also do I still use the Benjicot tags or is he now his own character now that he’s been mentioned finally ~3~ ?!

cw— NSFW, smut detailed to the best of my abilities. Minors do not interact. Interact with this and I’ll punch you so hard your ancestors will feel it I’ll-

< added one (1) new headcannon since posting >

Cool, calm, confident. That’s what Davos was. Surely it would translate to the bedroom too—it does not. He’s shy the first time around. Very much. Silent, rigid; his eyes simply darting up and down your body as you undress in front of him. The only sign that he’s there in the head is his hands gripping the comforter in his fists tightly. Before you begin, please give him a few kisses and reassuring smiles. Sitting in his lap and doing so does wonders. Run your fingers through his hair in a calming manner too.

You might have to pause, because he’s genuinely trembling out of excitement and anticipation that he cannot concentrate or continue without calming down. He just loves your touch! Any touch, all touch. Your fingers grazing against his skin, it’s like nicotine. Press your nose against his, laugh softly and kindly against his lips, and tell him it’s alright—you can wait a minute. His hands (shaking slightly still) will find their way to your hips soon enough.

Before you two experience each other more often. Before ANY sexual encounters, with you or not with you. He is the type of guy… to not know where the clit is. It’s a sad truth. You have to sit him down and literally point to where it is. No pants, sitting on the bed with your legs spread. It’s not even sexual at this point, you’re just letting him ooo and ahh at your pussy as you tell him what feels good and how to make it feel good. A lesson in anatomy that has him going (“…really?!”). Don’t worry. He gets with the program right away. When he figures shit out you won’t ever let him leave the house ever again.

If he’s already on the more experienced side and/or after you’ve both gotten comfortable with one another after months or a couple years; he is a fiend, a menace. He wants his sheets drenched by the time you’re both done. He wants you passed out, unconscious. If you aren’t being carted off to the emergency room after sex he feels he isn’t doing it right.

Speaking of.. He has sent you to the ER before. A bruised cervix that sent searing pain whenever you walked, burning aches in your muscles and bones from being bent or pulled around that. It’s something that’s never happened before and worried you enough to make Davos drive you to the urgent care. Embarrassment and a hint of disbelief burned on your face as the doctor awkwardly told you your diagnoses, splitting their gaze between you and Davos. The latter had the biggest grin on his face as he sat there like an innocent man. His apologies are a farce don’t believe it.

Needs you to sit on his face. Dude gets off on eating you like you’re his last meal, and makes it messy too.. Doesn’t matter when (or where..) but if you are not straddling his head, laying her full weight onto him—that’s basically like breaking his heart. He wants to die by your thighs that’s his goal. He is the type to grab and scratch at your thighs, squeezing flesh as he tries to pull you closer to his lips and tongue. Sometimes his hand leaves your thigh to deal with his own hardened cock—muffled and incoherent whines leaving him as he devours you sloppily and breathlessly. If he’s eating you out while you’re laying on your back; he will be pathetically grinding against the mattress.

Suck him off under his desk. Quietly slip underneath the wooden desk, he’s too focused on whatever he’s doing to even notice you undoing the string of his sweats anyways. Once he dies in-game and looks down he gets the memo, silently helping you slide them off of him as he talks to his team. Whatever you do, do not drag your tongue up from his base to his tip—especially when he’s comming to his teammates. He’ll be talking normally and then let out a nearly pornographic whine. If you choose to not be a menace off the bat and simply slide his cock in and out of your mouth; he’ll go blank in the head. He starts to mess up, mouth going slack as he splits his attention between the game and you on your knees between his legs with your tongue wrapping around his tip and licking off whatever leaking pre-cum you find. It’s the fastest he’s ever won (or lost) a game.

It’s edge or be edged in his world. Loves it when you tell him he can’t cum. A sloppy half-grin plastered on his face as you ride him. His hands holding your hips as he sits up, looking up at you from where he places his head by your chin. He’s gonna bitch and moan about it as usual, but slowly devolves into loud begging. His speech is slurred as his eyes stare up at you like your god who has the power to grant him that divine release he’s been denied for an hour.

He loves fucking you against the wall. It gives him a reason to show off his arms and muscles—and it feels good. If you have comments about your weight, your body, how will he hold you up, etc. Leave ‘em at the door, Davos does not care. He goes to the gym for this reason baby! To be able to lift you easily and hold you against the apartment wall as he pounds into you. His hands digging into the skin of where your thighs and ass meet. Wrap your legs around his waist, tangle your fingers into his hair. You’re not leaving until there’s a puddle of your arousal and cum underneath you.

Switch. He’s a switch. Let the world (and himself) believes he’s a top, only you will know the truth. And the truth is that he loves when you take control. Tie him up, slap him around, ride him till he’s crying and drooling from either edging or overstimulation—and then keep going some more. But also remember that he can easily overpower you, pinning you down to the bed or against a wall as he thrusts in and out of you with loud groans and words of praise. His hand holds your head down as he fucks you from behind, fingers grasping onto your hair as he rambles in a pleasured high. Davos is the type to tear underwear too, so be careful about that as well..

Davos is gentle, Davos is rough. No matter what, he’s mean about it. And he’s very vocal about it too. He’ll ask if you’re enjoying yourself, if you’re liking how rough he’s fucking your cunt right now—speaking of.. can you hear how wet you are right now, it’s almost embarrassing no? Ohhh, you like being used by him? Well.. he likes your sloppy pussy too—don’t worry. Made just for him, all for him. If he’s gentle he asks if you’re doing okay between the soft kisses he places on your neck and face. His face will nuzzle against your neck, soft whispers of how you feel entering your ear between groans. You’re just a sweetheart after all, aren’t you? So soft, so good, just for him. He likes how you feel around him, how soft your skin feels under his hands. So beautiful, so cute. Don’t you like how you can feel all of him as he thrusts into you slowly? Can you feel every vein and ridge? ‘Cause he can feel every squeeze and shudder from your walls darling.

Biter. I’ve got him pinned—Davos is a biter. Bites at your nipples before swirling a tongue around them and sucking harshly. Licks your ear before biting and tugging on it. He’s a bastard and bites your clit, a low chuckle coming from him as you yelp (he kisses it after, of course). Hickeys line your skin from your neck to your lower abdomen. Bite marks, prominent bite marks, are scattered across your body. No matter what, it’ll be on your neck mostly as well. From the front or the back, a bite mark will find its way to your neck. He just gets so into it! Dicking you down so roughly he just needs to latch his teeth onto your skin hard enough to draw blood. What? No he did not lick the droplet of blood up you must be imagining—

…car sex—I’m sorry I said it. At night when you both are skating or if he’s driving around with you. Sometimes you just end up in an empty parking lot.. the windows are fogged up and there’s music playing faintly, not that you care or really hear it as you listen to his moans. His hands holding your hips or waist as you slowly bounce on his cock while he sits in the driver seat. Bonus if you hold the thin necklace he wears between your teeth as you grind yourself down onto him.

Added! HE’S INTO SHOTGUNNING. Absolutely, how did I forget such a thing. Happens when you’re riding him. It’s a lazy night; him sitting in a chair, a cigarette between his fingers as you moan and whimper loudly. His other hand remains on your ass, guiding you up and down as he lets his head fall back briefly with a low grunt from his throat. He sits back up to take a drag from the cigarette, his other hand moving up from your ass to the back of your head (he gives you a parting slap to your butt). He presses your face closer to his and you instinctively part your lips, letting him blow smoke into it. He does talk you through that like he’s talking you through your orgasm, soft words of encouragement and guidance as he watches you blow it back out. It ends in him kissing you and wrapping one arm tightly around your waist as he starts to thrust up into you roughly. “In.. and out.. atta girl. There we are. Aren’t you just a good listener, my lovely lady?”

[natalchartnurtures]

PAC: Energy Check~ for wherever you are right now

This was completely unplanned but frankly spirit doesn't give a fuck about my plans. So if this found you, here are some messages you probably need right now-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

pile 1: Ooh.. as I was preparing to start your reading, I saw 11:11 as the Chariot card showed up for you. This. Tells me that you are pretty strongly connected to your divine path right now, which simply means that you're doing something that's keeping you in alignment, sweet pile one! Good job! Keep going down this road because you WILL stumble upon amazing experiences and people! This message is coming through quite strongly. Now, isn't that lovely? Hehe.

Here's the thing, though.. Although you're actually IN alignment with your greatest timeline and life, you seem to be completely UNAWARE of the fact! You might be going through the necessary purging emotionally and/or mentally as a result of this alignment since the "old stuff" has no more room in your new vibration anymore. So, you've probably had to go through some intense endings and/or tower moments in life lately and THIS has left you feeling really, really sad. Maybe even depressed. For some of you, if that's the case, please seek help, sweet soul. It doesn't have to be therapy but even as simple as talking to a trusted loved one, you know? Or even journaling about it could help if you're into it. It seems like you could use a new perspective on the things you're going through right now. I'm sensing that you might be feeling emotionally numb right now too, but that's because you've been doing a lot of emotional processing lately AND IT'S ALL PAYING OFF. I just need you to know that. You just can't see it right now because you're slap dead in the middle of the storm, and I'm looking at it from a bird's eye view, you know?

While you're purging old stuff, I also see you making your way through an old core belief - "I gotta work hard to be deserving of anything because I inherently don't" Or something along those lines. You may have started purging this belief as a result of life showing you that it's simply not something worth keeping alive inside you. Maybe recently, you caught yourself overworking yourself to death only to receive very little in return (in any area of your life - relationships included) and this experience helped you wake up to this unhelpful belief of yours. You're unlearning this belief as we speak. It's not easy though, but I CAN assure you, you're acing it.

If you find yourself worrying too much about anything and everything or simply feeling a general fear, just know that it's a normal reaction to having things uprooted in your life. Life, right now, is asking you to do your best to focus on what's right in front of you because if you do this, the future is guaranteed to sort itself out. I promise.

I love you so much, pile 1. I see all your hard work and am rooting for you SO hard, bro. Love and light.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 2: Seems like to me that y'all have been STUCK in a particular pattern for a while now, maybe years? For some of you folks reading? Let me spell it out for you what this pattern looks like to me - an imbalance of the mind and heart. Too much mind and too little heart. Maybe none at all.

I can't seem to tap into the root of this imbalance, maybe because it's different for each of you reading, OR maybe it's not relevant to us right now because you can simply begin to address this imbalance as you see it in your day-to-day. But I sense that you're really good at addressing things, so once you're conscious of this pattern going on subtly in the background, running your life, you can really do something about this. This pattern may show up as you struggling with feeling fear, and this is blocking you off to one very important thing fear is here to show us, and that is how to support ourselves. If we are afraid of something we desire and have a healthy relationship with fear, we go for the desire while caretaking our fear. I read a quote the other day, it said "Do that thing you love but if you find that you're scared, then go do it scared." The point I'm trying to make is, fear isn't going to go away on its own, it's you who will simply expand your ability to hold space for it AND your desires equally. When you figure out how to do this, magic will happen in your life. You'll find that your unwillingness to caretake your fear only gave you more things to be afraid of (because, hello, Law Of Attraction *lol*), BUT you'll also find that when you radically start taking responsibility for your fear(s), you'll be able to act from a wiser space and be your full badass self. You'll find that there are so many things you CAN do and so much life you CAN live. Everything you've wanted to start doing in life will start to happen almost seamlessly. It WILL surprise you big time. You're currently making your way through an important part of your healing, and that is to hold yourself in all your glory. To hold all parts of yourself, even the ones that are scared shitless. Once you've integrated this segment of your healing, SO many doors will unlock for you. Sweet soul, you have no clue of JUST HOW MANY. And this… is probably because you manifest with your heart primarily (meaning you feel things deeply and so you unknowingly tap into the frequency of what you want easily) and your fear is keeping you stuck in your head, which means you're only 40% of the full You right now, PRIOR the healing of c. You might even feel it sometimes. You might feel like you're only a shell of a person (been there myself, you're not alone in this!). Listen to that feeling. Your truth lies in there. You're meant to be the 100% you, and I see that you're already halfway there!

I love you so much, pile 2, sending you so much light and love. Hope you find the resources you need to make it through to your new life where you live in more love than fear.

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Pile 3: Man… y'all been fighting for your lives, huh? I see that you may be in the midst of a lot of divinely evoked darkness? Lol, I literally heard that - divinely evoked darkness. Maybe you're going through a dark night of the soul, perhaps? Whatever your're going through though, it seems like you've been hanging on for dear life.

Some good news for you- no matter the circumstances you're in right now (be it good, bad, or terrible), you've been doing all the work necessary to keep your head above water and have been diligently nurturing your own light, positivity, and essence. THAT'S incredible resilience, sweet pile 3, and I'm really proud of you! It's not easy to keep an open heart through bad times, and that's such a grand achievement in my eyes. UGH, BEAUTIFUL.

Your energy SCREAMS transition period vibes. You seem to be neither in your "old" timeline nor in the new one yet. You're sorta hanging in the middle right now. I see the Hanged Man in the third eye as I tell you this. Feels like you're in the void right now, and things just seem… bleh. Boring. Colorless. This is probably because you're already done with the ugly part of the process, "the divine shakeups", the loss, and the purge. Think… the bland but peaceful feeling you feel after having an intense ugly crying session, you know? Yeah, you're energetically there right now. You'll probably be here for a while longer because you've let go of MAJOR stuff, pile 3. Did you let go of people recently, maybe? Or that old bad habit, perhaps? That was the purge, so to speak. And now you're in the aftermath of it all, the uncomfortable but necessary calm.

-Side note: You might've struggled to embody your divine feminine earlier, but the timeline you're entering right now is the exact opposite of that. You might be attracted towards things that will help you nurture your own divine feminine right now. Give into it. Nurture patience, stillness, and compassion for self. It will HOPEFULLY speed up the void period if you consciously take part in it, you know?-

You're quite emotionally intelligent, and it has guided you throughout the whole process, and it also seems like it ain't your first rodeo in the process of proverbial death and rebirth. Good on you because you're doing a real good job keeping your calm through venturing into the unknown. You know what? You remind me of Elsa from Frozen, taking on the unknown like it belongs to her. You are such a queen, omg.

Yep, all that's left to do now is celebrate yourself, pile 3! Try your best to embrace this period, the void, and you'll be on your way to your next happy adventure! Love and light, sweet soul. Thanks for sharing your energy with me today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[pink-amethyst-tarot]

What your angles/guides are dying to tell you!

Take a deep breath and focus on which pile you think would be best for you

P I L E 1 P I L E 2 P I L E 3

Pile 1

Seven of Swords, Three of Swords (Reversed), Two of Swords, Ten of Cups, Four of Wands, Page of Cups, Two of Cups, The Lovers

After facing some deceit and hardships, you are healing and now is the time for you to open yourself up again because LOVE IS ON THE WAY!!!! This love coming in is what you have hoped for. This person is *your person* - your soulmate. I feel this wave of peace washing over me as I type this out and it is such a beautiful feeling. I can also see a wedding happening or just celebrations in general for you. Congratulations! I feel like the way this person is going to come in, it's gonna be a nice surprise. There is something that is going to just be a pleasant surprise. Like "OH! There you are! I didn't think I would see you here!"

Pile 2

Three of Swords, King of Swords, Two of Wands, 5 of Wands, Three of Cups, The Fool, Knight of Cups, King of Cups

Before I could really get started on any pile, the first thing I heard was, "Pile two, I'm proud of you!" (Hey, that rhymes!) I'm actually doing Pile Two first!

OMG PILE 2! You dealt with some kind of heartbreaking situation and I deeply think that it's related to romantic love but please take it how it resonates. But did you let it stop you? NO! You wiped your tears and decided to take on the world. It wasn't easy but you got through it and you leaned on your support system and you have been have a ball! I'm seeing fruitfulness and abundance in all areas of your life and because you have healed so much you are ready for a new beginning and a new chance at love! This person will be open with you and understanding. You've earned this.

Pile 3

Queen of Wands, Three of Pentacles, The Magician, Five of Swords, Five of Cups

Pile 3, to put it bluntly, you can be very pig-headed. You are stubborn and everyone else is wrong and you are right. Despite that, though, you are taking the time to unlearn those parts of you, and you are noticing new truths about yourself. I'm seeing the classic mean girl trope like Regina George but like using your bitchiness for good! GOOD FOR YOU, MAMA! Your guides are proud of you for not being so reactionary anymore. It seems you are finding other ways to solve conflict that are the least harmful for everyone one involved. I feel like you're in the beginning stages of this change and it doesn't feel good despite the good you are doing. It's all about finding balance and taking it one step at a time. Truth without kindness is just cruelty.

Divider Credit: @firefly-graphics

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LEGAL DISCLAIMER: FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. THESE READINGS ARE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. no guarantees are implied. These readings are not a substitute or replacement for any professional help or services. My readings are not a substitute for any form of professional legal, medical/psychiatric, relationship, religious/spiritual or financial/ business advice nor consultations. You should always see a professional legal/trained adviser for help in any matter. I am not responsible for any decisions/ actions you take.

[sibyllinebooks]

teen wolf boys and their love languages:

a/n: this is not proofread and it’s also my first post so be nice or i’ll cry lolol ( most of these can be read as platonic or romantic ) ok bye

scott: acts of service. hear me out: this boy takes care of EVERYONE. he’s the alpha, he always has to know the answers. the pack has a problem? everyone goes to him to help. so the moment you do something for him? he’s so relieved. it takes the constant weight off of his shoulders, if only for a little bit. and he might not say it, but he appreciates it so much. even if it’s as simple as helping him with his homework or doing some of the chores around his house he’s so dumb struck he doesn’t know what to do with himself. once, you brought his mom dinner when she had an overnight shift at the hospital and he swore to himself he would marry you. he’s so used to everyone needing him he’s never considering his own needs.

stiles: this. man. loves. TOUCH. his adhd makes his self control and impulses non-existent. if he wants to touch you, he’ll do it. he’ll hug you from behind or hold your hand or put his hand in your back pocket. sitting next to each other? your thighs are pressed together. across the table? he’s playing footsies with you. in class? his seat is right next to yours so he can reach his foot out to nudge you. sleepover? you’re cuddling ( and yes, sometimes he is the little spoon ). he always has to be touching you no matter what. maybe it’s the fact that he feels if he doesn’t, he’ll lose you the way he lost his mom. even platonic stiles is very loose with his touch. high fives, fist bumps, stupid secret handshakes, hugs, etc.

isaac: everyone saying physical touch because he’s been touch starved: you’re not wrong but i think it’s mainly words of affirmation. he’s so used to being told he’s worthless, that he’s disposable, easy to throw away. so the moment you tell him you appreciate him, that he makes you smile, that you’re proud of him, that he has VALUE, he has a hard time containing how loved it makes him feel. he often freezes up and mutters an awkward “thank you”. even if it’s just a simple “good job” for getting a good grade on a test, it helps him unlearn all of the negative beliefs about himself his dad imposed on him. he would be into physical touch with his romantic partner and people he’s close to but words of affirmation is gold.

liam: i had a tough time with liam but i think his would be quality time/body doubling. liam has always had a hard time with people wanting to be around him. they always treat him as fragile because of his IED, thinking that he’s one step away from going off. even more so when he became a werewolf. so for you to willingly spend time with him without any expectations involved? it makes him feel like maybe he isn’t all bad. you could be doing homework in his room together or watching a movie on the couch or literally sitting next to each other staring at a wall. he’s just happy someone wants to be around him and isn’t treating him like they’re walking on eggshells. liam only wants to feel like he’s normal and you’re happy to provide that for him.

derek: i was trying to do a different one for each of them but i feel like derek is a mix of acts of service and quality time. he’s had to rely on himself from such a young age that he’s grown self-sufficient to a fault. and when he was an alpha, he had to learn to take care of others and like scott, i think it took a toll on him to have to be the wise leader who always knows the answers. in that sense, i do think he knows what he wants. so if he asks for something, you’re happy to comply. now as to why i think quality time is also a big thing for him. he knows he can’t be alone all the time. but even with that, sometimes he doesn’t want to talk. sometimes he only needs your presence to reassure him he’s not alone. derek is a strong, silent type and i think that reflects in his needs.

[honeyedmiller]

Ring | Joel Miller

pairing: husband!joel x wife!reader

warnings: tommy’s being a little shit lol, marriage, reader is unintentionally oblivious for a bit, no outbreak, reader is depicted to be shorter than joel, au where ellie is joel and reader’s adopted daughter but she’s only very briefly mentioned, smut (bathroom quickie), slight jealousy, no use of y/n. 18+, minors dni.

word count: 2k

synopsis: Tommy teases Joel about you and him having marriage problems when he notices you aren’t wearing your ring.

quick one shot in honor of 700 followers??? oh my god?? i love u all sm thank you!!!

this was honestly kinda poorly written. forgive me :’)

“Hey big brother, what’s up with you and your girl?” Tommy asks, brows furrowed as he leans up against the counter next to Joel.

“Hell are ya talkin’ about, Tommy?” Joel continues to chop onions for the barbecue you guys were throwing today.

“Are you guys, I dunno, having marriage problems?” Tommy quirks a brow, and Joel halts his movements. He sets the knife down on the counter while averting his gaze up to his brother, expression clearly displaying pure annoyance.

Tommy might’ve bugged the shit out of Joel, but he knew he had good intentions. So why the hell would he be asking this?

“What makes you say that?” Joel crosses his arms over his chest now, waiting for Tommy to spew some bullshit at him.

“She’s not wearin’ her ring.” Tommy shrugs, and Joel’s permanent furrowed brow lines deepen even further.

“The hell she ain’t. She always wears her ring.” Joel argues back.

“Go see for yourself big brother.” Tommy gestures outside, where Joel pushes past him and slides open the glass door to find you at the cooler talking with some random new guy from the neighborhood. Joel noticed that he was trying to flirt with you, and being the naturally kindhearted and welcoming person you were, you didn’t catch on.

Joel also noticed that Tommy was right—you weren’t wearing your ring.

If there was one thing that Joel learned from you over the years you’ve been together and three years married, it was how to properly communicate his feelings. He used to be so closed off and would bottle everything up, letting stuff bother him until he became so distant.

You weren’t having any of that, though, so you sat him down one day and told him that you needed proper communication between you both. You were a saint with Joel, being so patient and kind to him as he was trying to unlearn his previous ways of shutting himself out from everyone around him when he didn’t exactly know how to communicate something.

Some days were harder than others, but ever the sweetheart you are, you never rushed him or got irritated when he couldn’t exactly seem to form his words to you. You just held him and kissed him repeatedly, letting him know it was okay and he could take his time.

This time around, he didn’t seem to have a single bit of a problem telling you what he was feeling. So, he walked up to you and wrapped his arms around your waist, kissing your temple to show the man that was so clearly interested in you that you were taken.

“Hey darlin’.” Joel rasps into your ear, kissing your shoulder afterward.

“Hey baby. This is Dominic. He’s new to the neighborhood. Dominic, this is my husband, Joel.”

Joel sported a shit-eating grin when Dominic’s body went rigid at the word husband. Joel stuck his hand out to him, and Dominic apprehensively shook his hand. Joel’s grip was firmer than it regularly was, and Dominic flinched in the slightest.

“Thanks for keeping my beautiful wife some company while I got stuff ready for the grill.” Joel’s voice dripped with sarcasm, and you looked up at him with a quirked brow.

He offered you a tight-lipped smile when his gaze met yours, clearing his throat. “Can I steal you for a minute, baby?” He asks, arms possessively wrapping around your frame. You nod, confused as to why Joel was acting a bit strange suddenly.

He intertwines your hand with his, and you excuse yourself from Dominic as Joel led you into the house and up to your bedroom.

“What’s this about, Joel?” You question as he closes the bedroom door, locking it behind him.

“Where’s your wedding ring at, baby?” He asks, looking down at you. A glint of something flashes across his eyes, but you couldn’t put your finger on what.

“‘S in my jewelry box. I didn’t wanna lose it helping around the backyard today or swimming if I did, so I knew it would be safe in there instead. Why?” Your curiosity is piqued.

Joel slowly maneuvers himself past you and over to your jewelry box, opening the top of it to firstly find your wedding ring neatly placed.

He takes the ring out of the jewelry box and walks over to you, grabbing your left hand to slip it onto your ring finger once more. Right where it belongs, perfectly fitted. He brings your hand up to his mouth, kissing your knuckles softly.

“Tommy’s bein’ a little shit, as always. Came into the kitchen with assumptions that we were having ‘marriage problems’ because you weren’t wearing your ring.” He tsked, shaking his head.

You rolled your eyes and scoffed.

“Y’gotta stop letting Tommy get into your head, J. I love you, I’m yours, and I’m not going anywhere.” You reassured him, and his lips curled up in the slightest.

“I know baby, I just can’t help but feel jealous when I see another man flirting with my woman.”

“Jealous? Of who?” You were puzzled at Joel’s confession, resting a steady hand on his warm chest.

“That new neighbor. Dylan or whatever the fuck his name is.” Joel spat.

You had no idea Dominic was even flirting with you. You thought he was just being friendly. Fuck, maybe Joel was right. Maybe you are oblivious sometimes.

You wrap your hands around the back of his neck, pulling him down so his lips envelope yours. One hand of his is splayed over the small of your back while the other rests on the outside of your thigh, rubbing small circles into your exposed skin. The dress you were wearing today was just another distraction for Joel and a reminder that he needed to behave himself or else the whole neighborhood would hear you saying his name like a prayer on Sunday morning.

Joel’s cock stirred at the thought, and he groaned into the kiss. You pulled apart from him and moved your hands down to his chest again.

“C’mon cowboy, people are gonna wonder where we’re at.” You grin, going to the bedroom door to unlock it. You were about halfway down the hallway before Joel tugged you into the bathroom on your right side.

“They can wait.” He closed the door and pressed you up against it, locking the lock before smashing his lips to yours.

There was so much hunger behind his kiss. You felt slick start to pool onto your panties, the want in your core licking a flame up your body. You moan into the kiss, gripping the back of his head to mold yourself even further into him. It was nothing but teeth clashing, lips smacking, and fervor for one another as the kiss continued.

“Gotta make this quick, babydoll.” Joel finally broke the kiss as you softly whined, and he turned you around to move you in front of the wide mirror. You met his gaze through the reflection, nothing but hunger in his eyes.

He lifted up your dress and pulled your panties down your legs in one swift motion. His middle finger wasted no time in collecting the slick arousal between your legs, causing you to moan softly.

“Always so ready for me, baby.” Joel chuckled darkly as he brought his middle finger up to suck your arousal off of it. He looked you right into the reflection of your eyes as he did so. The sight was nearly pornographic.

You bite your lip and plead with your eyes; please please please just fuck me, Joel.

His middle finger made its way back down to your slick cunt before he pushed it into you, pumping languidly. He curled his thick finger to hit the spot that drove you wild, and you found yourself gripping onto the counter for dear life. You decided, though, that his finger just wasn’t enough in this moment.

“Please, J. I need you.”

“Need you too, baby.” Joel got the message clear as day, unbuckling his belt and undoing his zipper and jeans button in record time, pulling down the fabric along with his boxers. His painful erection sprung free, and he lined himself up with your throbbing, aching cunt.

He easily found home in you as he sunk to the hilt, groaning at how good you felt around him.

“Be a good girl for me and tell me who you belong to.” Joel’s voice was dark, teetering on the line of possessive. You found it hot, though.

“Y-Yours, Joel. ‘M all yours.” You can barely say your words as he starts to rock his hips, deliciously stretching you out every time his hips collided with your ass.

“That’s it, baby, mine. No one else’s. Perfect little pussy is mine, you’re mine, mine.” He gritted into your hair, pulling you back against him by your waist as he rocked his hips up into you. You leaned your head back on his shoulder, moaning his name softly.

“Gotta be quiet, baby, can’t have anyone hearin’ us now.” Joel kissed you sloppily to hide your lewd moans, hips snapping up into you.

“Fuck, Joel, feel s’good.” Your words start to mesh together like you’re absolutely cock drunk.

Joel bends you back down over the sink and gently wraps his hand around your throat, forcing you to look up into the mirror as he pounds into you from behind.

“So fuckin’ beautiful. Takin’ me so well, sweet girl. Been teasin’ me with this little dress on all day.” Joel lets go of your throat and slides his hand down to your front, rubbing your clit in fast, circular motions.

You barely have time to process that your body is about to give into Joel’s expert touch. You squeeze your eyes shut, jaw falling completely slack as you let out an accidental loud moan. Joel didn’t even stop you that time, because he himself was already on the brink of an orgasm.

“Cum with me, my love.” Joel groans into your ear. You both let go and just let it happen, praying that the music playing in the backyard is loud enough to cover your wanton moans as you both come down from your orgasms. Joel was reluctant to move out of you at first, but he couldn’t take the way you were clenched down on him anymore.

You were so fucking intoxicating and if it were his choice, he’d gladly be buried into your sweet, warm cunt all of the time.

Reality trickled back in around you both as he pulled out of you with a groan, both breathless and panting. After readjusting and redressing himself, he grabbed a washcloth from the cabinet above the toilet and wet it, wiping down the excess of his remnants on the apex of your inner thighs. He planted a kiss on the back of your thigh, pulling your panties up on you as he stood back up.

He helped fix your hair and readjusted you so you looked almost completely normal, albeit your face felt hot and you had a post-fuck look on your face.

He brought you into his chest, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as he kissed your hair.

“I love you, baby.” He murmurs softly, rocking you for a minute.

“I love you too.” Your reached your left hand up to hook onto his forearm that was wrapped around you, giving it a squeeze. Your ring glinted in the sunlight that pooled into the bathroom window, and Joel smiled happily.

“We’ll continue this later tonight, baby. Maybe Sarah and Ellie can spend the night at a friend’s house tonight.”

Your lips curl into a smile at his suggestion, and you lean up to kiss his cheek.

“Let’s get back out to the party.” He pats your ass and opens the door, coming out after you. You make your way down the stairs, Joel hot on your trail.

Tommy gives Joel a knowing look of ‘I know exactly what you two were up to.’

Joel scoffs at Tommy and grumbles as he moves past his younger brother.

“Marriage problems my ass.”

tag list: @party-hearses ; @nostalxgic ; @ilovepedro ; @bastardmandennis ; @tinygarbage ; @cool-iguana

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Simon tricks Price into their bedroom after getting desperate for his attention. #GhostPriceWeek

Day Two: Heart/Alpha

cw: omegaverse, fingering, penetrative sex, eventual enthusiastic consent, Price's hang ups with his secondary sex, mating marks, knotting. ( @gomzdrawfr )

Simon sat on the edge of the bed and watched Price as he stood by the window, shoulders squared, his hands tucked beneath his arms as they pulled tight over his chest. He was tired and Simon had tricked him into leaving his office by saying he needed his thoughts on some performance data. Price operated better with pen and paper so he was used to being called in for a face to face. Emailing him was pointless at the moment anyway, because he had several hundred in his inbox from two days leave that he was working through, and the whole fuckin’ point was to pry him out from behind his desk. Bloody muppet.

“‘m sorry, know you’ve got a lot on, I jus’..."

“Ya coulda jus’ said, Simon,” Price said tightly, still chewing over his irritation. He didn't like being lied to. And he absolutely didn't like being fuckin' lied to by Simon Riley specifically. It bit at him in a way very little else did.

“Yeah, right, like you wouldn’t’ve made some shitty excuse,” Simon said dryly, folding his own arms now. In his fleece shorts, cotton t-shirt and bare feet, he looked no less broad than if he sat there in a carrier vest with an M4 cradled in his arms, but the soft fall of the material left far less to the imagination, and Price was staring out the window partly because he knew if he looked he would give in. He smelled bloody gorgeous too, warm and inviting, a scent that sat on the back of Price's tongue and made his mouth water. Simon sighed. “You don't ‘ave time, I get it.”

Price bristled. “I woulda made time.”

“Yeah? Bullshit.” 

“Ya givin’ me attitude, lieutenant?”

“Simon's givin’ ya attitude, ya lieutenant finished his fuckin’ paperwork an’ clocked out three hours ago.”

Price flinched and closed his eyes. There had been hurt in Simon's tone; subtle, no more than a tremor in his deadpan rumble, but it had been there. That was Price told; well and truly put in his place. Served him right for being a fuckin’ cunt, didn't it? He pinched the bridge of his nose, shoulders slumping forward. “Sorry, Simon, I… uh, that weren't fair.”

Price heard the bed creak, old springs sighing with relief as Simon's bulk left them, and in the next breath he felt all the warmth of his mate press up against his back. “Yer shagged, love. I can see that. Lemme hold ya, fuck… I'm gaggin’ for a kiss. Anythin’. Haven't even touched ya in weeks. My fuckin’ ‘eart aches.” 

“Sure it's not ya dick?”

“Fuckin’ ‘ell, you grumpy wanker… so, wot? Can't want both? ‘m a man with needs. An’ one is you. All of ya.”

“Didn' ‘ave you down as the hopeless romantic,” Price mumbled, blinking quickly as Simon's warm palms swept around his waist, his nose nuzzling into the fabric of the shemagh wrapped around his neck. “I can't… I've got..”

“Ya can, please, for me… jus’ one night, let me make ya feel good, an’ then fall asleep in my arms. S’all I need an’ ‘ll stop bein’ a needy twat.” 

“Y’ain’t a needy twat.” Price tilted his head against Simon's and let out a deep sigh through his nose. It felt like a ratchet strap had broken loose, his body deflating against Simon's chest. It was so difficult to let him take the wheel; the insecure, indomitable part of Price chafing at the mere hint of submission. But it wasn't submission, was it? It was letting his partner care for him. 

Unlearning the association in his head between intimacy and surrender was a long and winding road, and Simon was so fucking patient with him. So patient that Price felt unworthy of it sometimes. It had to be frustrating to be stuck with an omega whose first instinct was scepticism when offered affection, who had to be coaxed and gentled into spreading his damn legs. Simon could have had the pick of anyone, with the size of him, but he had chosen the scruffy, half chewed wanker in a boonie hat.

Price felt Simon's chapped lips in the bristles of his beard and knew he was desperate to go lower, to close his mouth over the mating mark hidden beneath Price's scarf. It was a level of intimacy Price had always sworn he would extend to no one and it still made him apprehensive in the moments before Simon got there, no matter how many times he proved to be a safe pair of hands. The complete opposite to what anyone would expect of a man that looked like him. Price figured Simon had seen so much brutality from others that he had made the conscious effort to be completely the opposite in his romantic life. 

“See, few weeks without some practice, an’ you're gettin’ anxious again.” Simon's hands slid up Price’s torso, nose tracing his hairline at the back of his neck.

“Not bloody anxious…”

Simon's hand pressed over the left side of Price's chest. “Yer ‘eart says otherwise.” Beneath the pressure, Price could feel it; the frantic thrum of his heart against Simon's palm. The stress of the last few weeks, several operations happening overseas at the same time, all the strings in his hand, left him on a knife edge. The exhaustion was bone deep, his nerves raw. He knew he had become waspish and short with his subordinates, his temper on a trigger even more so than usual…

Some time with Simon would be good for him. Even if his mind still struggled with it all, his body was bonded. Time with his mate would help his mind find the rest that had eluded it for days now, whether it liked it or not. There were some comforts only a bonded pair could provide each other. Price sighed, lifting a hand to twine through Simon's fingers. For fucks sake, it was Simon. This was how it was meant to be. Price was allowed to find comfort in him.

“G’won then. Feel dead on my feet.”

“No need to sound so enthusiastic,” Simon said dryly.

“Yer gonna whine more or you gonna get to it?” Price grumped in return.

Simon responded with a chuckle, rubbing the side of his chin against Price's shoulder. “Bad tempered old bastard.” He said it with such deep affection that Price’s chest felt a little light.

Simon hooked two fingers in Price’s scarf, drawing it off to expose his neck and throat to the cool air. Goosebumps erupted over Price's skin and his arms dropped to his sides, fingers flexing into his palms as he chewed the inside of his cheek. The first few times they had done this, Price had snarled and put Simon on his back, teeth bared, so his jittery anxiety now was progress.

Simon chuffed softly at him, soothing noises made to gentle a distressed omega, and it appealed to Price's base instincts, the ones already luxuriating in the scent of his mated alpha folding around him. His chin dropped forward and he drew in a deep, shuddering breath so that Simon's scent flooded his senses. Simon kissed across the newly exposed skin, palms pulling Price back against his chest so that his scarred lips could reach everything they wanted, and Price lifted unsteady hands to hold his wrists. 

“Breathe, John,” Simon whispered, breath tickling the little hairs on the back of Price's neck.

“Yeah… yeah, right.” As Price’s chest filled, Simon pressed close and dragged the wet flat of his tongue over the sensitive scarring on Price’s neck. Price exhaled with a soft noise, his eyes flickering back, his knees quivering as Simon lapped again. It was like a hundred gentle fingers stroking over his shoulders, down his neck and back to his navel; a tug of pleasure so deep, so instinctual, that it was impossible to resist. 

Damp lips parted, his body sagged into Simon's arms, and Simon chuffed his approval against his skin. Price, his mind eased into a foggy pleasure, offered his first faint trill in response. It curled up his throat, a soft purr, and Simon squeezed him fondly, kissing that mark until Price's knees began to shake again.

“Hmm, easy, love. I've gotcha.” 

Simon guided Price towards the bed and gathered him into his lap, Price's knees bracketing his hips, and Price sank down gratefully, the seat of his trousers pressing to the warm bulge of Simon's crotch as they kissed, Price's hands sliding around Simon's firm jaw. He stayed lost in Simon's mouth as Simon worked his boots and belt off, letting them fall heavily to the floor. His shirt followed, Simon's fingers working down the buttons before pushing it from his shoulders. He pulled it down until the fabric pooled at Price's wrists, trapping them just behind him so that his full chest was thrust out and Simon could kiss the newly exposed skin.

“Ah, Si…” Price gasped. Simon's mouth was bloody heaven; his agile tongue curled around a nipple, lips sinking down to suckle, and Price moaned softly, his hips rolling forward to grind down against the hard length pressed up between his legs. He knew he was getting wet, could feel the slickness in his boxers; it was easy to relax into it when Simon was being so gentle, and his body was so desperate to feel him, the promise of that hard bulge was enough to make him weak.

“Thassit, gonna make you feel so good.” Simon squeezed Price's arse and encouraged the slow rut as he worked over his chest to give the other nipple the same attention. Price squirmed when Simon paused to tug his own shirt over his head and Price shedding his own completely in favour of pushing his fingers into Simon's blond hair, clutching his face close.

Without the cotton barrier, Price could rub himself against Simon's soft body hair, the firm, scorching plains of muscle, the thick musk of his alpha scent coiling around Price's mind like a physical touch, coaxing him deeper into a foggy headspace. He settled into it slowly, reluctant to let his control and alertness slip, but their mated bond smoothed the process. The descent was irresistible when every part of Price, mind and body, wanted to purr with pleasure at Simon's attention.

“Doin’ so good, love,” Simon whispered, his breath hot against Price's sensitive nipple, puckered and hard. He plucked open Price’s fly and slid his hand into the front of his boxers, thumb reaching down to circle the engorged, eager hardness of Price’s cock before dipping into his slit. 

The first touches sent sparks through Price's hips with such intensity that he growled, fingers tightening in Simon's hair. It had been so long. He hadn’t even touched himself in the interim; touchstarved didn't even cover the desperation currently bubbling under his skin. “Fuck, s’too sensitive.”

“Mm, you're jus’ turned on, need to relax. Here, get these off, le’s get comfy.” Simon tapped Price’s waistband and placed a final kiss in the centre of his chest, before relinquishing him. 

Price stood unsteadily, shoving his trousers and boxers to the floor until he stood naked before Simon’s appreciative gaze, his toes curled against the floor as he fought the urge to cover himself like some fair bloody maiden. “Wot?” Price asked, trying to come across authoritative but knowing it was somewhat meak given his flushed he was. He could feel the wetness between his thighs, and couldn't help how his own eyes wandered lower to Simon's crotch. 

“Fuckin’ gorgeous,” Simon replied, his low voice thick with desire. He shuffled back on the bed, creating himself a small pile of pillows to lean back on, and then patted his thighs. “C’mere, lean back. Still look like yer about to breach a room full’ve Al Qatala.”

“They'd ‘ave a nasty surprise,” Price murmured as he clambered onto the bed, setting his rear end down between Simon's legs, his knees gathered to his chest. Strong arms curled around him, big enough to make even Price feel well handled, and he huffed softly as he was drawn back into Simon's warmth. 

“Hm, dunno, think they'd see ya in a whole new light. Body as good as yours might bring world peace,” Simon said against the back of Price’s neck.

Price chuckled low in his throat, squirming a little as Simon's hands stroked up his belly to his chest. “I’ll ask Kate whether she thinks yer idea’s operationally via-ah, fuck, Sim-mmn.” 

Those soft lips had closed around his mating mark again, palms massaging his tits before fingers and thumbs began to caress the soft blush of his nipples. Price’s body relaxed in increments, the slow build of heat and pleasure as Simon stimulated two erogenous zones chasing away the last of the anxious tension keeping his back and shoulders stiff.

Simon slid his palms down the length of Price's body to his thighs, lifting them over his own to spread his omega open, and Price huffed in momentary discomfort. He felt exposed, vulnerable; he glanced at the door, tried to keep his eyes open, but Simon deepened his kiss against Price's mark as one hand returned his chest, the other sliding gently through the folds of his cunt. Three points of warmth, of being covered and protected by Simon's body, grounded in the pleasure and reassurance of his touch. His fingers were firm, possessive, rubbing over flushed, slick skin in skilful passes, thumb and the sides of his fingers circling up and down the glistening length of Price's aching cock. 

Fuck, when had he got so hard and so wet? When had his body become so desperate for Simon's touch that it now throbbed under his fingers? Price made soft, tortured noises of bliss as Simon played with his cunt, suckling harder on his mark to trap Price in a feedback loop of euphoria that overcame the momentary distress of being spread open. 

Simon's moan of appreciation rolled through Price's body from his shoulder, and Price curled an arm up to hold Simon’s head, lifting his hips in encouragement as he surrendered completely to his alpha's hands. Simon's mouth drew away from nursing his mating mark to nibble Price’s ear, muttering soft praise. “Yer so fuckin' sexy…”

Price huffed a soft, delirious laugh at how drunk Simon sounded, slurring out ‘sexy’ like it was treacle on his tongue. Suckling on all those omega pheromones had done a number on him. But Simon soon got his revenge, his second hand joining his first at Price’s cunt, a thick finger sliding inside.

Price lifted his head and looked down the slope of his body, groaning at the sight. There were few things hotter than watching Simon's big hands pawing at his cunt, spreading his slick folds open, teasing and squeezing with perfect pressure while his thick fingers plunged in and out of Price’s hole, glistening with evidence of just how fuckin’ turned on he was, how close to the edge as thrills of pleasure pulsed through his core like an electrical current. Price rocked up into it, throwing his head back as his orgasm tingled at the very edges of his awareness. “Ung, Si… fuck, gonna…”

“Yeah, g’won, don't hold back,” Simon said, and the long, slow lick over Price's mating mark was enough to finish him off. He was skilled enough to slow his caresses as Price came, his entire body tensing up, eye screwing shut as he gasped Simon's name over and over. It was intense, white light behind the eyes, his cunt soaking Simon's palm, and he gasped tightly until the swell of pleasure ebbed lower and he was able to slump, panting, against Simon's chest. In a haze, he watched as Simon lifted his hands away, only to slide his wet fingers into his damn mouth with a satisfied groan. 

“Ya filthy bugger,” Price mumbled, delirious. He flopped away, his cunt still tingling with the aftermath of his orgasm, the air cool against his sweaty back as he sprawled on his front. “Gimme a moment, I'll see t' you.” Simon’s cock was testing the fabric of his shorts, a damp spot soaking through at the tip, and Price’s mouth watered at the thought of the musky taste of it. 

“Oh, love, only one place I wanna be. Tha's knotted inside ya.” Simon lifted his rear and shoved his shorts, his thick cock flopping back against his belly, strong veins running its length from root to tip, ruddy and leaking. Price let out a soft moan, pressing his chest down and lifting his hips a little. The sight and smell of it in the mire of pheromones and arousal, the way he wanted Simon's heavy bulk over him, pushing him down… 

“Oh, fuck, yer wanna be bred, don’tcha, love? Desperate for a good fuckin’ knot, my hot load fillin’ y’up...”

“You got a filthy fuckin’ mouth, Riley…” Price growled, fuck… half moaned. Yeah, he wanted all of that. Every last word.

“Can't help it, seein’ you like this, so ready fer me, does somethin’ to my brain.” Simon rolled onto his hands and knees and crawled over the bed until he was sliding over Price's back, his knees either side of Price’s thighs. The slick head of his cock pressed into Price's slit, nudging the underside of his cock as it slid back and forth, teasing. “Tell me ya want me, John. Tell me ya want me t’ mate ya.”

Price clutched at the sheets, panting, as he felt Simon's huge cock grind against him. His heart hammered in his chest, not through anxiety, but raw, primal need and excitement. He could feel Simon above him, big, thick all over, his body glowing with the heat of arousal, the bulbous tip of his cock pressing insistently against Price’s entrance with each pass. He felt enveloped, overcome, and all he wanted was to feel his alpha inside him. “Yeah, Simon… please… fuck me, please, need ya…”

Simon growled possessively, his cock sinking into Price's cunt all at once, sheathing itself inside him in a single, fluid thrust that knocked the breath from his lungs. He felt so perfectly full, Simon's huge prick satisfying the clutching need tightening in Price's gut. Simon didn't give him a chance to grow used to it, the fullness, and withdrew for another deep thrust that ground his full, heavy balls against Price's slit.

Simon didn't need encouragement, his knees spreading, cock plunging deep. Price cried out as his body was made to yield over and over, relaxed muscles stretching wide, so slick that every thrust sent a hot swell of pleasure licking up Price's spine. Simon curled around his back, big arms bracketing Price’s shoulders as his belly bumped against the curve of his arse, cock welcomed deep inside Price's eager cunt as Price tilted his hips up, his knees digging into the mattress for purchase. 

“Yer so fuckin’ wet, fuck,” Simon groaned, hips slapping loudly, shunting Price into the bed with the force of his movements, strong arms keeping him pinned in place so his body couldn't be forced further away..

And it was so damn bloody good. 

Simon found the perfect angle, punching low moans from Price's chest, stoking a furnace of white hot pleasure in his gut that only intensified when a large hand folded over Price's jaw, thumb slipping between his lips like Simon wanted to possess every damn hole Price had. Demanding lips found his mating mark once more, teeth nipping and tongue laving, short-circuiting Price's brain as he moaned wetly around Simon's thumb. 

Simon was so hard, so fuckin’ big, Price was sure he could feel Simon's heartbeat throbbing through his cunt; a relentless, powerful thrum matching the frantic pump of his own. It was his only anchor, his mind soft, completely enraptured by his alpha’s body, his scent, the sound of his guttural snarls as he took his pleasure and promised to come deep inside his omega’s cunt. Price's body was like Semtex, manipulated in Simon's hands until the very moment he wanted it to detonate. 

“Harder, fuck… Simon, harder, yeah, yeah, like that, mmm, ahh!”

“Such a greedy hole, perfect fit for my dick,” Simon growled, his voice tight.

The stretch intensified as Simon's knot began to swell, forcing Price wider, and Price would have been ashamed of the wrecked wails breaking from his throat if he'd had much awareness left. Simon had fucked him senseless, his mouth hanging open, his hands scrambling at his sheets, his entire body numb and alight with sensation at the same time. Just a snug, wet, eager hole for Simon to fuck. He balanced there on the edge, his toes and fingers tingling, the intensity of the pleasure making his cunt spasm and flutter around the relentless piston of Simon's cock.

Price lost track of how long he was pinned beneath his alpha's body, gloriously helpless as Simon hollowed him out, wringing pleasure from him without mercy. Price needed that knot to fill, and each time it popped in and out of him was sweet torture. He needed it swollen in his cunt, locking his alpha inside him, needed to be filled so absolutely that he didn't have room to breathe, as Simon brimmed him with his seed. 

Such a desire would have disgusted him before he had bonded with Simon and perhaps, in the cold light of day it would again, but in the frenzied heat of their coupling, the thought of it made him almost mad with need. It was primal, instinctual, born from millions of years of evolution. 

Simon's hips stuttered, slapping hard in two final thrusts, before his knot ground into Price's cunt as his cock pumped him full of cum. Price moaned loudly as he was bred, Simon's teeth massaging around the scent gland beneath his mating mark to hold him still. Price's climax poured through him in answer to the flood of heat inside him, his channel clutching at Simon's knot, milking it in tight pulses as Simon rocked his hips in slow, lazy rolls, as if he could fuck his spend deeper into Price's body. 

“Christ, yer a fuckin’ dream…” Simon slurred, mouth drawing away to lap at Price’s mark between each word. His cock was still twitching, and he groaned when Price's body squeezed in response.

“Was so good, Si… so fuckin’ good…”

“My cock, my knot, everythin', s’all yours, ‘m yours… love you, John. Love you so fuckin’ much. Get so low when yer not here, when we can't be close.”

Price twisted as much as he could for the kiss, their tongues lapping together through parted lips. It was a promise. Price could do better. He could make the time. He had to. All they had was each other, and apart, without an opportunity to mate, to hold each other, their hearts ached. And he had been a prized fuckin’ wanker for being up his own arse about it earlier. It was hard enough for Simon to ask for things without Price adding to the hurdles. 

With a soft sigh of contentment, Simon nuzzled Price's hair after their lips had parted and Price's face fell back to the sheets. In the haze of fucked out bliss, Price melted into the bed, his alpha knotted deep inside him, heavy body draped over, protective bulk caging him in, Price closed his eyes and drifted…

When Simon's knot went down some fifteen minutes later, he withdrew gently, rolling Price onto his back. Price arched as kisses trailed down his chest and belly, moaned softly when those chapped lips reached his cock and sucked it hungrily, before that clever tongue slid into his cunt to taste their coupling. Simon's big palms rested on the inside of Price’s thighs, pressing them out, but Price didn't need coaxing; he threw his arms above his head and rolled his hips slowly against Simon's mouth with wanton abandon, gasping and moaning encouragement, his legs spread wide so Simon could tongue and kiss his sensitive cunt without restraint.

Simon was his, and he was Simon's, and for the rest of the night, that was all that mattered. Two lovers, one heartbeat.

[gatheringbones]

If I'm 23 and have never been in a sexual or romantic relationship, is there a point in trying? I feel like I missed the boat on developing the skills necessary to make either of those things work, and it'd be selfish of me to expect others to hold themselves back so I can unlearn all of my emotional and sexual issues with them. Part of me feels like it's possible to unlearn all of that by myself, but another part feels like it's like any other two-person activity and no amount of solo practice can really prepare you for actually engaging with another person. And honestly, it just hurts that I'm this old and this far behind, that there's this whole side of the world that I haven't experienced, these whole new facets of people's inner worlds and intimacies that I haven't been exposed to. I feel like I have only a very surface-level relationships with even my platonic friends because I don't actually understand or relate to anything going on in their romantic or sexual lives. Like I'm an overgrown child. It doesn't help that I'm very isolated by the material conditions of my life and I can't see those changing anytime soon. I dunno. I realize that I'm just demonstrating all of the negative traits you were talking about and that I'd just be using a partner as a tool for my own masturbatory self-aggrandizement (i.e. caring more about wanting to float around in a sea of my own feelings instead of forming an actual connection to another human being.) It just sucks to admit the truth that I have to become a whole person before I can stop being alone and that it'll probably take me like years before that happens and then I'll be a thirty year-old virgin in a world of people looking for someone to settle down with that I'm going to have to ask to be the equivalent of a high-school fling. I'm sorry for ranting in your inbox, I guess if anything it's a good indication that your post struck a nerve in the insecure do-nothing fandom lol

I realized partway through reading this that what you are reacting to in such horror is in many ways the story of my life and I found it very funny. when I reached the part about the terrifying fate of being a 30 year old virgin I laughed so hard I scared the dog.

I met c when I was twenty nine. my life was unrelenting isolation and horror. I’d kissed all of three people. I didn’t stop being a quote unquote virgin until six months into our relationship. I spent most of my twenties doing exactly what you described: floating through the motions of dating using other human beings to play out preconceived ideas about myself that only left me bored and bewildered. Everyone I met was doing the exact same. We treated each other abysmally; like objects.

then I kept looking and kept throwing out my net and c showed up (because she was looking and throwing out her net). your question made me so exuberant with joy I upset the senior citizen chaweenie mix she adopted five years before she ever met me.

everything will turn out all right.

[amourdivine]

𝐖𝐇𝐎'𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐖 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅? ઉ   PICK A CARD

Hello lovelies, I hope you're having a wonderful week! This is perhaps the first heavily shadow work focused PAC I bring to you. I'm quite nervous to post this, since I know delivering these messages can be difficult and I don't like taking a harsh, judgmental approach. I hope this reading resonates. As always, feedback is highly appreciated! If you liked this reading, please consider tipping me at @ amourdivinetarot@gmail.com! xo ♡

paid readings are closed as of february 2024

none of the images are mine unless stated otherwise!

pick a card masterlist & information

how to choose your pile.  take a few deep breaths for and look at each and of the piles separately. see which one brings you to a feeling, a place or a memory. take your time and feel free to come back to it later!

amourdivine. 2021 - 2024 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

୨୧ PILE ONE

who is your shadow self? eight of swords • knight of cups • nine of wands • queen of wands

Your shadow self is the fearful side of you attached to anxiety. The side of you that does not believe you can save yourself from bad situations and feels endlessly hopeless, helpless and trapped. It causes a self-fulfilling prophecy, one where you think you'll inevitably fail, so you self-sabotage (either consciously or not) and end up "proving" yourself right.

However, as helpless as your shadow feels, it never asks for help. It's trapped in a spiral of shame and self-doubt, even self-hatred. All of this happens mentally for most of you, to the point where your body is neglected or stuck in flight / freeze mode. I feel stuck in the gutter, unable to move in the sticky mud. Despite your best efforts to succeed, you may suffer from impostor's syndrome as well, an inability to see your worth, your beauty and your own light. It's almost as if you're scared of your own power, pile one. Very painful, very self-inflicted and something which you may have learn from childhood, maybe you got bullied a lot or were heavily criticized by the people around you. If that happened, I'm so sorry pile one. You deserved so much better. You still do.

how can you work with your shadow self? nine of cups • the sun • queen of swords • queen of wands

You know, when I was entering college, I had a counselor whose words were life changing to me. One day, he picked up a cup full of coffee and asked me: how do you get rid of the coffee, without throwing it out entirely? And I was puzzled. It wasn't possible. Him, in his neverending patience, took me to the water station and started pouring water onto it, until the coffee was cleared away and all that remained was clean, crystal liquid.

Maybe the bad things that happened still haunt you, but they can be drawn out by the good ones. Seek for the light, pile one. Seek the nurturing experiences, the days when you allow yourself to just be, seek the help, the love and stay open to the love. Stay open to the idea that yes, you are worthy, even if you do not feel like it, even if so many people have made you feel otherwise.

These wounds may not fade entirely with time, but you are more than them, always. Always. I know it's never easy to challenge what we've been taught about ourselves, but in order to unlearn all of that, you will have to learn the new things, the true things about you. If they said you were lazy - was that really true? Or were you just tired? You're not "naive", you're pure. You're not "too sensitive", you're in tune with your emotions.

The stories we tell ourselves hold power. What stories are you telling about yourself? Maybe it's time to switch to a new point of view, one where you can rewrite yourself as the person you were never allowed to be.

୨୧ PILE TWO

who is your shadow self? judgement • five of swords • ten of cups • king of wands

Your shadow self is the side of you that thrives in chaos - listen, that's not entirely a bad thing, after all, our shadow reflects something which we need to acknowledge, nurture and work with. However, when you perceive danger or feel threatened, you may turn to harsh words or hurtful actions to avenge yourself.

It can manifest in the form of extreme competitive behavior, the inability to rest, overworking, even maybe envy, jealousy and arrogance sometimes. Now, I'm not here to judge or shame you, you're safe here. I think you have and still feel the need to prove yourself to others, to prove them all wrong. Maybe other people told you that you couldn't do it - and you took it all personally, so personally that it crumbles your self-esteem when someone diminishes your efforts or accomplishments.

Your shadow side craves attention, praise and approval. You want to succeed, to be someone you're proud of, to just never feel insecure, diminished or ignored again. You can also turn possessive with loved ones, wondering if they really love you or if they are lying. There's a lot of skepticism here, too.

how can you work with your shadow self? judgement • ace of pentacles • three of pentacles • eight of swords

Acknowledge your feelings and these insecurities. "Fake it 'till you make it" doesn't always work. Being vulnerable is, ironically, also being strong. Understanding your limitations and allowing for other people to collaborate with you (and vice-versa) will take you even further in life.

Your sense of justice is commendable. Make sure you're using it for justice indeed, and not just vengeance. Your ambition can walk hand in hand with your desire to do good, to make space for everyone else to shine, to open up to others, let them see all of you. No one can love perfection - even if they could, what's there to love about something or someone so perfect that they barely feel human?

It's okay to be scared, to feel insecure, to not shove difficult emotions under the rug. We cannot be at our 100% all the time. And we cannot please everyone, all the time. What you can do is praise yourself, let others praise you when they do and accept it gracefully, making sure you're spreading your warmth and wisdom to others as well. See, I think you have overcome a lot and a lot of people could use your help, either in the form of advice, resources or a shoulder to lean on.

You have leadership potential, pile two. Don't limit yourself by being alone. We were never meant to make it on our own.

୨୧ PILE THREE

who is your shadow self? ace of wands • page of swords • three of cups • king of pentacles

Your shadow self is someone who may indulge in harmful habits out of a need for instant gratification, maybe reckless spending, speed driving, partying everyday or simply not saving up resources and caring about the future. Your shadow self is someone who hates boredom, who craves excitement and cannot fully deal with long-term commitment in its many forms. It wants novelty, adventure and it comes at the cost of your responsibilities, your routine and your friendships even.

This shadow self hates suffering (fair enough, who doesn't?!) and will to go great lengths to avoid it... but ironically, it causes you more pain in the long run by avoiding the unavoidable. By never crying, never addressing your issues or your difficult moments, you end up running right back into yourself and these same issues return.

This side of you doesn't want to grow up - you don't want to fall into the trap of routine and a boring, 9-5 job. But excessive habits are difficult to maintain, no matter how good it feels in the short term. There's a difficult, troubled perception of adulthood and life itself. A need for constant adventure and chaos, a feeling of entrapment whenever you are with anyone who loves you, because you fear being controlled, tamed and used.

how can you work with your shadow self? the tower • nine of wands • nine of cups • three of pentacles

To put it simply, let yourself hurt. Let the foundations of your heart crumble, stop to feel just for a second. You don't have to be on the run all the time. What are you running from, pile three? Disaster, pain and hurt are often inevitable, but they do not have to be the be-all, end-all of our lives. The Tower is a reminder that all that crumbles was meant to crumble eventually, and there is beauty in letting things end naturally, allowing the flow of life to do its thing.

That means aging, growing, learning from the seasons. I think you have a very, very deep heart and mind you're scared to tap into. You're scared to be trapped in the endless hustle, to never feel alive or good once you "settle". But who says the big joys are the only ones that matter? As someone said once, big joys and small joys are often the same. Sometimes, waking up in itself can be an adventure. Don't overlook or underestimate the ways life tries to find you, to cling to you - remember to embark on the hard journeys, knowing you'll have gotten something valuable in the end.

You're brave and rebellious. You can be a catalyst for change in so many ways. Who said adulthood has to be boring? Who said you have to work a 9-5? Do you have to get married? Maybe being a stay-at-home parent isn't for you. That's okay.

Challenging the status quo may not be easy, but you have a natural inclination for it. Your shadow self can dive deeper. It's one of your greatest tools. Your need for joy and fun is not shameful - you can use it for healing, instead of self-destruction.

୨୧ PILE FOUR

who is your shadow self? judgment rx • justice • the high priestess rx • knight of swords

Your shadow self is the side of you that refuses to acknowledge your needs, your wants and desires. It makes you live inside of a bubble, scared of the truth, even if it will set you free. I had the hardest time shuffling for this pile, I kept trying and trying but nothing made sense. I think this is how your shadow side manifests as well, in the lack of clarity, the fogginess that permeates the choices you've regretted.

It's both reckless and frozen, completely lost in a maze, confused, looking for a path, for directions, for anything. It's almost as if you lost your compass, nothing eventually guides you and you remain looking for the directions only you have.

It's too scared to admit what it wants, who you are. Both out of fear of what other people will say, but also out of fear that it'll all go wrong. It's the side of you that remains disconnected from yourself, hidden because it keeps highlighting the aspects you keep trying to ignore, to not know. It can manifest in a lot of ways, either through people-pleasing or being completely reckless. Through lying, denial or even isolation from the world, from life itself.

Something funny is that a song by Bad Suns that just started playing really relates to this pile. "Cinderella slips into a dream like a curse / you could mistake it for heaven at first." This shadow self may live in projection, daydreaming or simply keep you out of touch with everything.

how can you work with your shadow self? six of pentacles • page of wands • two of wands • king of cups

Engagement and socializing are big ways you can work with your shadow self. Being actively curious about the world, about people. Approaching relationships, truths and life itself with genuine interest, no judgement or shaming thoughts involved.

Telling yourself you're an eternal student of this world, because we are and remembering you don't have to know everything. Start scared. Most things, you'll have to do it scared. Unprepared. In the thick of it all, you'll find the answers you need, but only if you are willing to dive deep for them. No taking shortcuts, making assumptions or allowing self-doubt to paralyze your living, because you need to witness life as it is.

Therapy is one big thing, music as well. Anything that connects you to your deepest self, relationships that genuinely make room for who you are, good friends that feel safe and non-judgemental. Your heart has been calling you for so long, pile four. It's about time you listen to it. It knows everything you need to know.

disclaimer. tarot not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i do not take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings. please remember you are responsible for life and in power of it, no one else! ♡

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