#understandably my parents and my relatives grew up in another country but

[mmmmuffins]

.

[odinsblog]

“I had a Zionist grandmother who grew up, she grew up in Poland, she was supposed to go to Israel to study. Her father had paid for her for the first year of tuition. And then in 1939, when she was in her last year of high school, Germany and the Soviet Union invaded Poland.

She ended up for a couple of years in the Soviet-occupied part of Poland, which was how she ended up in Moscow. And by the time Germany occupied all of Poland. So then she spent the rest of her life living in Moscow.

And 45 years after the end of the war, dreaming of being able to go to Israel, but not being able to because she was now stuck in the Soviet Union. And so I think I was very infected by, infected in a non-derogatory sense, by my grandmother's dream of Israel. And I had my own dream of Israel growing up as a, as a Jewish kid who was bullied and beaten up and teased.

I just wanted to live in a country that, that was majority Jewish. I could not understand why my parents would want to go to the United States and live in another country where Jews are in the minority. My parents on the other hand just didn't want to be Jewish.

Like their only experience of being Jewish was being systematically discriminated against. They were both born during the Second World War, so they were second generation, utterly non-religious and separated from any Jewish tradition, except the tradition of being a targeted minority. So they just, they just wanted to go somewhere where they wouldn't be Jewish.

And so when I was 15, a year after we moved to the United States, I actually went to Israel planning to stay there and didn't. For a variety of reasons, but one of them was being confronted with, with what I found at the age of 15, a shockingly racist society.

So the first time I went to Israel was when I was 15, it was 1982. And then there was like an 18, 17 or 18 year gap.

And I started traveling to Israel regularly from 1999, 2000. And the first time I went back was to actually complete the research on the book about my grandmother's. So it's been a good 25 years that I've been coming back.

And I think Israel has undergone a lot of changes in that time. But no, I don't think that like the kind of Ashkenazi Sephardic racism that shocked me in 1982 has found subtler expressions. But politics of settlement have only been exacerbated.

And I still find them extremely painful to observe, especially because some of my beloved relatives are settlers.

I did visit them this last time I was in Israel, because I really wanted to see what it looked like for them.

I was compelled to go visit them because of a Facebook post that my cousin made. And just to give you an idea, I really hold these people very, very dear. But for years, I would go to Israel, Palestine and not tell them that I was there, because I kind of couldn't face them.

So it's been a number of years since I last saw them, a number of years since I went to that settlement. But my cousin had posted something on Facebook. It was a picture of her son playing the violin.

And she wrote, in one of the houses where they stayed in Gaza, there was a violin. He played for his soldiers and then put the violin back. And I found that post-heart-rending and eye-opening, the picture of him playing the violin was not from Gaza.

It was from earlier, but he had apparently told her about playing the violin in Gaza. And obviously she was worried about her son serving in Gaza and so she's posting about it. And she wants to assert that he is a good boy.

But also, entirely missing from that post and from her world view is that somebody lived in that house in Gaza. That violin belonged to somebody. Like, it was such an extraordinary example of the blindness that we were talking about a little bit earlier that I wanted to go visit them and kind of engage with that blindness more.

And I got a really good dose of blindness to the point where, and we had this incredible moment when we went walking around the settlement after Shabbat lunch. And we sort of got to this hilltop where there's a swing and there's a little free library.

And we're looking out on a Palestinian village. And I said, what are we looking at, to my cousin? And she was trying to get her bearings.

And she said, where are we looking? And she named another settlement, which was kind of, which was not on our line of sight. It was like this literal example of looking at an actual Palestinian village that she drives past every day.

And before the village was sealed off after October 7th, she used to get gas there. And she knows it exists. But somehow she, also it also doesn't enter her geography.

It is nameless.”

—Masha Gessen, the descendant of Holocaust survivors, discusses the dehumanization of Palestinians (part 2 of 3)

[fantomette22]

What are some Maria headcanons that you have?

( @izunias-meme-hole)

Lady Maria headcanons post (part 1) :

Alright! Well I already share those a while ago : https://www.tumblr.com/fantomette22/743244500505378816/lady-maria-vs-keeper-of-the-old-lords?source=share  +couple of other around my blog

So I will try to share other things not just related to « Maria could do pyromancy from her living if she really wanted to but was actually terrified by it! Because she didn’t want to use her own blood to inflict pain and death. » also I won’t explain in detail how I hc she got her Rakuyo : by directly going to the East herself! (Yamamura’s country).

🍂But why did she name it like that? The Rakuyo? Well Rakuyo means « fallen leaves �� right? Well, when she finally got her blade she needed to baptise it, to use it properly for the first time. And guess on what she uses it? A fallen leaf! (naturally falling in autumn). Cut it straight in two halves. And that’s how she knew how she was going to name it.

Enjoy the ride t's going to be long ;)

⚔️She got an Evelyn gun during her teenage years and before the Rakuyo she often train & fight with both a chikage and a reiterpallasch (she really like dual wielding 😎 or maybe with another sword like the shadow could have been a thing she fight with 🤔 but yeah I guess she was trained with all type of weapons) I wonder if she could have been a bit ambidextrous too.

⚜️Ok now concerning her family (tree) I have at least 5 different headcanons for it 💀but let’s just go with my main one aka the fic verse one (where she’s just Annalise’s cousin XD). Because if you get me started on the alternatives it’s just never gonna be over XD (those are really in very different timelines. It’s not really the same characters & events are different)

🩸I imagined she had quite a mixed relationship with her family. It’s like when you love them bc it’s your family, you like the good memories and nice moments you have, this little chill & special outings etc but there’s also some stuff you’ll never be able to forget or forgive them. You feel you need distance and be autonomous to not get hurt by them anymore, to not get frustrated and misunderstood. Just have news and share things outside.

She never really fit in with her peers. Kinda an odd one who just masks really well to fit into the mood when asked of her. I prefer to say « a (white) wolf » in a pack of hounds in context but yeah black sheep in a white flock if it’s easier to understand x) She had a lot of pressure on her shoulder as well (being the last pyromancer and not far in the line of succession)

But she really likes her close cousins which she grew up with (Annalise, Vled), a couple of other friends (Charles, Svetta, a couple of future young knights etc) as well as younger relatives and kids (Leo etc)! But she doesn’t get that much along with the others. Like she goes along better with the servants probably. 

⚜️She mainly grew up between Cainhurst and where her parents had lands and their manor (in the north, near a coast). Her parents are often not there because they are sent by the crown to places so it's complicated . When her mother is in a good mood that’s mostly fine, her dad is a bit more chill (he taught her how to play a lot of card games and poker too! She probably played 2-3 times with money at stake. She prefers amical things. She will absolutely beat your ass at it too. She’s the definition of having a poker face XD)

👑She was a lil bit raised like a future lady in waiting but more as future knight (page (of the king), squire, knight training etc really rough training too 💀 very dark shit hm like beat the shit out of people while wearing a full weight armor, swim in a ice lake and idk shot hm dead things… I swear there’s more fun things but hm yeah…)

That one really isn’t fun as well but i imagined that during her teenage years she already had to deal with mental health issues (due to well some pb with her family etc). Thankfully, she did get better after spending a summer a bit far away at a friend's home (to simplify). Still she got scared for some years afterwards that some of those dark thoughts would eventually return. Thankfully it didn't for most of her life. She got some happy times…Bad times too but not that bad until well probably more than 15-20y later where you know… she would sadly not make it out this time.

🌌She was accepted as Byrgenwerth and went to mainly study sciences, astronomy, but did learn a bit of theology as well as medicine (basic medicine stuff,  nurse & help midwife etc). She did 5y and got a master degree. She also participated in underground expeditions arranged by Byrgenwerth.

⭐️She probably know how to speak way more than 2 languages : whatever they speak in Yharnam, latin/pthumerian language, whatever the equivalent of Japanese is and probably a bit of other European languages too. Oh a north/slavic languages as well, because she had ancestors from there too).

🐴When she was very little they got some borzoi I guess but most of her life at Cainhurst she got 2 siblings crows (I have Phobos & Deimos names in my draft) as well as her own horse, named Filan. (mean little wolf in gaelic/irish apparently? Speaking of which Maria's nickname when she was little was "little wolf" maybe in another language too). She probably had a couple of plants too.

(suppose to be almost a full black horse but i’m not 100% settle because i could go full horsemen of the apocalypse aesthetic with other knights if i change the colors… but in my first draft that’s a black horse yes)

🔥When she was very little they discovered she could eventually have pyromancer blood power.It might have been a huge pride for them and honor for her but… clearly Maria didn’t want to become like the shadows of the antics pthumerian royals. A silent and hidden knight who kills without asking questions… clearly she wasn’t really found of this idea 😅 Thankfully for her she don’t know or to use such power and didn’t put much effort to try to learn it (in life she will probably accidentally use it 2-3 time…)

She highly respects a lot of traditions and culture from Cainhurst but there’s stuff like exposing the remains of animal prey that she found a bit barbaric. She doesn't mind others using blood blades and she will do it alone/ for training or even in choreography but she doesn’t wish to hurt or kill with it.*

💔So she was supposed to become a royal guard but things didn’t go like they should have…the poor young knights got into a fight with something by accident… a mortal trap they couldn’t win… only Maria made it out alive. Very hurt and slightly traumatized… She then had a huge fight with her family & relatives about what happened. She couldn’t even send news to her friends bc they forbid it to calm any rumors about what happened…Hm then Maria’s family decide to send her more north where her parents have lands etc so things calm down and she could ya know do her knight work or smt. Anyway she run away at Byrgenwerth💀

Sorry for the meme jebfekb I am not giving lot of details for now but it's highly link with my Knight & Beast of Cainhurst story.

(Why this meme too? Well due to rumours her friends legit thought she died 💀 she went to Byrgen only 1-2 months later. During the holidays. So she sent to like Ludwig & the other who weren't there letters to tell them she was ok. That's were came this meme XD)

❤️‍🩹Anyway she was partially disowned of some stuff for a bit and didn’t came back at Cainhurst for while. But after some times, her and her family wanted to both apologize and reunite, but without an occasion it would be complicated. Well, until a CERTAIN SOMEONE stole the forbidden blood to Cainhurst and tell them Maria helped 💀 (she had no idea, and he only did that bc he owns her one). So she didn’t approve but she kinda reconciled and they gave her the occasion to do a mission for them later on, in JAPAN (the Eastern land) and well you know the rest.

⚓️She had the occasion to go to « Japan » and have her dream of becoming like half in charge of a ship after getting her master degree! (she just did navigation stuff with the stars but maybe she was captain lol that’s what she wanted to do when she was little actually. But reading Evelyn diaries and not just the novels she realised how hard it was to always have such life h24)

Congratulations Lady Maria! 

After really hard years.. and trauma… and a exhausting presentation 

You win : 

a master degree in astronomy (sciences & other things)

a nice meal with your parents & family that congratulate you

a big part of your inheritance back!

a super wine bottle to share with your friends

 a trip to japan

finally your promised personalised double sword

a personalised hunting attire when you came back

to able to work with gehrman’s hunters & the healing church when you came back

So proud of you ❤️👏

✨Other lil hcs : 

Laurence made her very interested in religion. I am not joking, I sincerely believe he converted her somehow. / Made her very interest into great one religion etc

Gehrman saved her life more than once, she did the same. They went into lot of hunt training/camping trip as the beggining of being hunters.

She became great friends with Ludwig, Rom, Caryll, friends Damian too etc back at Byrgenwerth. With Micolash it was a bit more nuanced for a while. Before becoming close friends they were roasting each other often XD but respected each other too.

Her brooch either came from her mother or the late queen (aunt) so a family heirloom I guess. Ressemble a lumenflower. 

She helped the early healing church with treating people, make food, teach kids etc

She was highly respected by all the old hunters. Even if she had some tensions with dear Izzy at like the beginning they knew each other XD She earn their respect and everyone ended up very liking her being her kindness, abilities etc

When she was sent alone or with a couple of hunters to help in a secluded villages, people were of course really skeptical at first but she quickly proved them her worth.

I think sometimes she wears dresses…  but hey she never wears high heels or ballerina shoes (she hates it so hey she still has her special style! aka huge boots XD) It’s often very simple ones as well. Except at Cainhurst, it’s not very extravagant.

She loves to read tons of books (cainhurst library is there for smt XD)

With her cousins they loved to explore and wander the castle! At night too.. got them into trouble more than once.

Sometimes she wears sunglasses when it’s very sunny (poor girl has white eyelashes you see! she have an excuse)

She really loved the lumenflowers too like i explained last time.

She got some scars at the base of her neck. That’s why she almost always wear a jabot with her broach. (maybe on the hands too. that’s why she often has gloves).

She made (with a bit of help) Gherman’s red scarf while in japan.

“Of the Astral Clocktower” because she basically funded its construction with her own money. So like it’s partially hers on papers. (She did mostly astronomical studies & took care of the patients kind of like a nurse during her time at the research hall

She could play a couple of instruments (especially violin and cello). 

Of course she know many ballroom & court dance and taught other to others when they were invited to some places.

She actually can “sing” very well (but more music without real lyrics like the dream ost for exemple) ! She would probably almost never do that in public too.

Some books at the workshop are hers

Oh, did I already told she was very scared of pthumerian pyromancers before she fought the keeper of the old lords?

Ok now because I didn't know what to add to the post I asked some of my friends to help me with questions they wanted to know about! Thanks @heraldofcrow & @fareehaandspaniards there you go:

Was she comfortable with life at Cainhurst? (Before the Vileblood)

I think I answered that above ^ it’s very complex and complicated. Sometimes it goes well (especially in childhood) but sometimes it’s very complicated and not so good… (especially during teenage years and during some events where she got a lot of pressure and all. It got better after all this mess and Vilebloods mess of course (even if some distance was left compared to before). 

🩸🐦‍⬛Bloody Crow’s relation to Maria? 

In my main hc he’s the son of Maria’s cousin (Vled, the knight). So her little cousin basically. But to simplify I often say he’s like a nephew to her. I named him Voron! (I know very imaginative it means raven XD)  Still unsure if he’s born before or after the hamlet (probably after too) but in all cases Maria was around to help with the birth and to help take care of him for the first couple of days. She loved him very much. Also In the case something were to happen to his parents, well the king & queen would take care of him but if somehow they can’t/something were to happen to them too, Maria promised she would be the one to take care of him. 

Still, she died when he was very young. Probably like 3-6 years old. So he does remember a bit. But just a little and he has very good memories of her. But he also saw his family hurting from her disappearance and all and so he grew more mixed feeling but mostly it stays positive. He really looks like her in a lot of ways.

🕷️Rom and Maria friendship 🥺? 

I see you want to know more about their friendship! I think They had a wholesome friendship overall! But it didn't begins great. I am trying to write it in my fic since a few months but it's all hard and idk how to do that exactly XD

Like they were doing a group exercise and Rom was pretty bad and it (supposed to be quite easy) and Maria who got frustrated to explain it so much lash out a bit and tell her like “are you dumb or something?” 

Everyone in the class isn't very nice to Rom (and Maria) and said worst things behind her back so she thought that was, you know OK somehow and not that mean. But she quickly realized afterwards her mistake, that Rom was the Provost daughter and that she had some disability. But despite that, she was still trying hard and she must be very strong to have the lvl to be here you know! 

Maria feels very bad about it (Micolash had dark looks to give her too lmao)  but after a while (talking with other people cough cough) she decided to come to her and apologize sincerely and even try to help her on a few things.

Rom was quite surprised at first because nobody, you know approaches her like this to apologize and that's a huge thing considering Maria is from Cainhurst and a noble.

I mean she didn't even have hard feelings against Maria because everyone else is way meaner and she kinda forgot about it. She was quite surprised but also very thankful and they began to talk more. Micolash was the most surprised and he told Rom to be careful to not get walk over, to not believe lies and stuff but he quickly realized that it was genuine. And Rom had to reminded him (with Damian) that well, when he first meet Rom he was kinda of a bully at first!  Before becoming a mother hen with Damian.

So yes the two girls began to talk about a lot of things! She even got invited to Rom’s room. There’s tons of insects and underglass and stuff but generally people don't like that but Maria found it cool! She got some back home too and found it very interesting actually! So they quickly became friends with all the little gang. And also they are basically the two girls of the squad! I mean Caryll is in the girls squad too but they can also be in the boys squad so yeah anyway you know how girl besties can be x) you don’t share the same things exactly. Plus Caryll & Rom are really in the must protected squad.

 Maria even defends Rom from her family when she came back for the holiday and they asked her if she made some friends and who they were and stuff. And you know uh Mara had to told them in a very exaggerated manners that « oh I'm friend with the Provost daughter you know! » (You know because that's what they want to know, if she made strong connections with interesting people before anything else…)

But of course, you're going to have very rude comments from some relatives or something who’s going to say “oh the retarded one?” 💀  And everyone's looking at him like “can you please not say it like this?”  Poor Maria just standing there and dunno what to say because she really cares about her as a friend. She doesn't just want to have friends to show off she has important contacts. She genuinely values those friendships. Sadly, she can’t just tell her family that her friends are mostly “the weird introvert group kids! just like me!”(so she talk about Ludwig too! but don't put too much details on others…)

So yeah they stayed great friends for years. Sadly, in tough moments they didn’t really share what hurt them to the other… (after kos etc maybe a bit but not too much)

🗡️🛡️What or who inspired Maria's path of knighthood in her youth?

History books & knight novels! Her grand uncle, the other knights, king etc, Her family push her/ “let her choose” that way as well.

Lady Evelyn stories (she was like Maria grand aunt/ cousin of her grandparents, mostly an adventurer).

The bodyguard of Annalise’s mother who was at first a mercenary sent to Loran before becoming a royal knight.

🍜What were Maria's food preferences?

Hm i think if it looks/smells average and edible she’s actually not that complicated XD She made a lot of effort through the years to get used to more common and simple food.

My poor girl couldn’t really cooked anything when she arrived at Byrgenwerth besides cutting basic things, make tea, made ramen and skins animal meat (like rabbit) before Gehrman thought her other recipes 😭 (she made great soups afterwards! hunters like it, she cuts aliments well XD but yeah my boy cooks well for everyone he made her liked many simple things that if not done well many don’t like. But bro is the only one who probably likes some chard gratin or something out of everyone…)

Like most of her family, i supposed she would very much enjoy some rare/medium rare meat XD but when it’s EVERYDAY she got very tired 💀 I mean she tried to tell her family it was too much so they respected her wishes and gave her only vegetables for a couple of days… but not like normal meals no! like a whole ass not decorticate salad or full ass carrots with skins and all! 💀 She rapidly apologized like you can guess. (still she can’t stand those damn carpaccio when there’s too much!)

Besides that yeah only non meat dishes don’t bother her at all, she would even prefer most of the time. She likes both sophisticated but also very simple dishes she discovered.  Exotic food from the east. Of course my girl liked sushis, fish, sea fruit etc. I mean she used to like it way more before… you know… afterwards many hunters couldn’t just smell white fish for a few days without feeling nauseous…. for Maria she just couldn’t bring herself to eat like 95% of white sea fish anymore… (I guess salmon and thon and lobster were still ok but that’s it really).

And well of course deserts are always so nice so whatever 🤤

🌻Her relationship with Adeline?  /Who is Adeline to her in your interpretation? 

(Yeah both of you asked me this one! x) )

Well depending on the interpretations I have two main interpretations for her! (in the AU/very different timeline where Gehrman is like Maria's dad, that's her girlfriend lol) but in my main interpretation that’s not really the case. I prefer to see them as friends and very close friends I think? during her early time at the research hall. Another close friend she made who’s mainly outside of her main group. But both have quite an evolution through the years they knew each other. 

If i remember the draft in my head correctly it goes like this : 

After Maria graduated (and came back from her mission trip) she went to help the early healing church develop itself and its activities between hunts and going in the pthumerians labyrinth and that’s where she met Adeline.

I supposed Adeline is a Yharnamite? but she lost everything (her family. not sure what happened) and basically didn’t have a home anymore and clearly saw herself as worthless (poor girl had terrible self esteem issues all her life afterwards…) So the early healing church took in some people in need, gave them a place to sleep, eat and heal them if they were sick. Maria took care and helped Adeline during that time (after it was Laurence too).

And so the 2 became friends! In the end Adeline (who had nothing left) decided to dedicate her life to the healing church and helped others as well, so they saw each other with Maria afterwards! They advised each other and could have been a bit confident of each other as well. Of course Maria wasn’t very hyped when Adeline became a blood saint fully (seeing the bad things it could do to people) but she respected her choices.

During the research hall, before Adeline took part in the experiments, she helped Maria, Rom, Caryll etc around with the patients & other things. I suppose because of some dreams/ exposure to something, the decline of everyone's mental health, and maybe other people asking her... she decided to give herself fully to those experiments as well in the end… Her death was one of the last straws for Maria...

----

I know I have more questions left but I am reaching Tumblr word limit soon so I will reblog/make a 2nd post (or even a 3rd)💀 with the rest of the most interesting (and huge) questions! It's not quite written yet but for now this should be a nice distraction and a good reading I hope!

[niuniente]

Alright, I've got a inquiry. Why doesn't Kizzie just disown her dad? Then legally she's not related to him and should be able to stay in the music business in her town, right? I've read a lot of stories about adults who have disowned their parents so theoretically this could work?

Grudges carry really, really far. I've grown up in a rural area, where grudges carried over for centuries. What your great-great-great uncle did in 1823 mattered so much that you were still tainted by that action. It was even worse if it was someone from your immediate family, like a parent or a sibling.

No matter of disowning this relative or trying to explain that I am NOT the same as my family member and hey, this thing happened in 1744 didn't take the grudge away. These carry (still!) in small areas to such extend that you might have difficulties getting a job (because the said great-great-great uncle screwed something over, or your great-great-grandmother was rumored to bewitch someone's cow so that it died).

Same works the other way around, too! If you great-great-great uncle was someone important and very valued, you're automatically great and valued too. You don't have to do anything to earn this respect; it's automatically given to you in your blood.

For example, the small rural area where I grew up in always celebrated everyone who graduated from a high school. The people in the area collected some money, typically like 100€, to give for the student as their sign of a gratitude. Typically 1 or 2 students graduated each year, some years none did.

This was a long tradition. Everyone had gotten money. But, when I graduated from a high school, I wasn't given money but a cheap utensil set.

It took me like two decades to understand that why I was not given money was because of my father's reputation and our status. While he was a hard working guy, he was also financially abusive, always in dept. The people apparently feared that if I get money, my father will take it, so they bought me utensils. But they bought a cheap set with less value than the 100€ because we were a newcomer family, clearly not to be trusted that well with no roots in the area (we had lived there 9 years by this time but were still "not welcomed" because we didn't originate from the area), and thus, my value as a person in that area was low. I was an outsider getting into a tradition which had been going on for a long time but which clearly belonged only to the people who had lived there for long as a family line.

While Lywood is a big city, the music scene there is like a little world or a village of its own. This is still true in modern days, too. When my friend, who works in an entertainment industry and in the capitol area, started a relationship with a same sex partner, they both hid their relationship for 10 years from work, because they both feared they would lose their jobs. And we're talking about the entertainment industry! Actors, directors, composers, dancers, opera singers, artists etc. who are generally very LGBTQA+ friendly (and this whole country is) - and yet, since in the industry everyone knows everyone, my friend and the partner didn't want to take a risk of their reputation being stained by their personal love life. They honestly openly came out as a couple after 10 years when they got married and my friend had gained enough reputation as a reliable employee and her resume was honorable enough to guarantee her more work in the future. It seemed to pay off as she signed a contract with a company for a permanent position recently, and she doesn't have to jump from a project to another.

These kinds of things are at play with Kizzie's case. Curiously enough, Kizzie seemed have taken a risk and counted it as the least of all evils to ask help from a Death-Head....

[darkfeanix]

Thedas Tuesday

Oh, boy, this is just scratching the surface of my guy Elio. Or at least his history. You'll understand what I mean when you see the quotes I included. Also, if you're curious, he's going to look like the Rook from the release date announcement trailer, because that guy is just so handsome. I hope he's a preset so I won't have to painstakingly try to recreate him in the CC.

He'll probably be more of a "fanfic Rook" than an "in-game Rook", because I have accidentally embedded him in the Nevarran royal family and I somehow doubt that will be an option in The Veilguard.

Now, without further adieu...

Elio Van Markham

Human Mage | Mourn Watch | Voice: Alex Jordan

"Today there are fourteen branches of the family—eighteen, if one counts our relations among the Van Markhams—each consisting of multiple families and twisting bloodlines connecting us to almost every major house across Thedas."

—From a letter by Baroness Alia Pentaghast, 9:38 Dragon

"I have hundreds of relatives so distant, they need charts to prove we're related at all. And they have them, oh, yes."

—Cassandra Pentaghast, to the Inquisitor, 9:41 Dragon

Elio Baltasar Leonidas Caspar Van Markham (born 9:24 Dragon) is a Marcher-born Nevarran of the noble Van Markham family, and a member of the Mourn Watch within the Mortalitasi. He is the oldest child and only son of Lady Davinia Van Markham and her husband, Lord Guillermo Selbrech. Born and raised in the city of Hasmal, Elio grew up on tales of the Grand Necropolois and Mortalitasi, with his mother making sure he had a proper education in the traditions and customs of her home. More than one journey was made to Nevarra city to attend the funeral of one distant relative or another, and it grew to be a point of fascination for Elio as he got older.

In 9:33 Dragon, shortly before his ninth birthday, Elio was attempting to perform funerary rites for his recently departed pet cat when he accidentally summoned a spirit of compassion into the body. Far from being frightened by the unexpected possession though, Elio was actually fascinated, and he carried on a lengthy conversation with the spirit before his parents found him and discovered what had happened.

His father, a dedicated Andrastian and Maker-fearing man, wanted Elio immediately sent to the Hasmal Circle, but Lady Davinia wouldn't hear of it. No son of Nevarra would be confined to a common Marcher Circle, particular not with all the recent rumours of unrest coming out of Kirkwall – to say nothing of his clear natural affinity with spirits. No, Elio would be sent to the Cumberland Circle where his talents would be appreciated, and his abilities could be nurtured.

As his mother hoped – or perhaps it would be more accurate to say she expected – Elio did indeed flourish at the Cumberland Circle of Magi. He flourished for the next seven years, until the Circle leadership voted to secede from the Chantry. Having never experienced the kind of oppression and abuse that so many of his fellow mages had, Elio was reluctant to become involved. When the Seekers of Truth declared every member of the Mortalitasi an apostate, however, he was just one of many who rose up.

Many mages died on that day, but the templars were routed, and most of their number driven from the city. More than any other country outside of Tevinter, the Nevarrans appreciate the work of its mages, and the attempt to annul the Circle brought a swift and deadly response from the city guard, along with a number of mercenary companies paid by noble houses with family among the Mortalitasi.

[giraffeter]

Hi again ^^

Thank you for that delicious ArmKhun headcanon answer. I have an immediate follow-up ask. You mentioned that you have vivid background headcanons for all the bodyguards, as if that isn't a massive tease. Any details you'd be willing to spill? 👀

Haha I suppose that was a bit of a tease! Your asks keep making my DAY, I will happily talk about these boys all day every day.

OK, the Giraffeter Bodyguard Backstory Headcanons are:

Big: I alluded to some of this in Gonna Fade You Like That Rush, but in my mind Big is the son of one of Korn's lieutenants — his dad works for Korn, his grandfather worked for Korn's father, the families go back. We know that he's one of Korn's hand-raised bodyguards and that he and Kinn grew up together; I think Korn would not be interested in caring for a bunch of additional children, so my headcanon is that his hand-raised boys stay with their families of origin until they've completed their mandatory schooling, which in Thailand is through Grade 9 — Big would be 14 or 15 when he came to the main family house and began his training. Big is the younger son in his family: his older brother will inherit their family's piece of the Theerapanyakul criminal empire, and Big's been marked for Kinn for basically his whole life. Even before Tankhun's abduction, Big belonged to Kinn. He met Kinn for the first time when he was about 12 and Kinn was 15 or so — Kinn was the coolest Cool Older Teen Big had ever laid eyes on. He smiled that devastating smile at Big and talked to him about video games or something and Big plunged headfirst into a fealty kink that would last the rest of his brief life.

Ken: As much as I have read and enjoyed many fics shipping Ken with various other male characters, my favorite headcanon for Ken is that he is the "token straight" in the main family house, and as such is relatively immune to the psychosexual shenanigans taking place on all sides of him. He's from a fairly well-off family — he grew up in Thailand but went to an international school, and he went to college in Australia. He was a competitive swimmer all through high school and college, which is why the "nice one, loser" moment cuts so deep. He has that very dangerous trait of "smart but not as smart as he thinks he is" in addition to being pretty greedy and amoral, so my headcanon is that he was boosting cars or some shit and stole the wrong car. Chan gave him a choice of "well-paying job for life or bullet in the head right now" and he happily chose the former. He thought working for the mob would be a lot more glamorous and exciting than it turned out to be; that, combined with aforementioned unwarranted self-confidence and greed, was what made it so easy for Gun to turn him.

Arm: I covered this in my answer to your delightful previous ask so I'll be brief here, but my headcanon is that Arm is ex-military and a trained field medic, and has some experience being around PTSD.

Pete: Pete is another one where we actually do know a bit about his backstory: the abusive father, the loving grandma, the complicated relationship to food, the history as a boxer. I don't understand Thai well enough to verify this but when Pete says "boxing" I assume he means muay thai. Pete is a real country boy, and I think he didn't spend much time in Bangkok before he came to work for Korn. I think he dealt with some food insecurity as a kid, from a combination of his dad not having much money and also just not being around much to feed him — I think his grandma (who I think he calls ยาย meaning she's his mom's mom?) took care to feed him up as much as she could when he visited her. My headcanon is that Korn straight-up bought Pete, either for cash after seeing him fight or as payment for a gambling debt his dad owed Korn's organization.

Pol: I think Pol was another one of Korn's hand-raised bunch, although his background is different from Big's. I don't think his parents are directly involved in the criminal underworld in the way I imagine Big's as being; instead, I think they're just regular working-class people who own a business, maybe a shop or something, that comes under Korn's purview. We've seen that the Theerapanyakul empire contains as many legitimate enterprises (bread company!) as illegitimate, and we know a lot of their money comes from real estate, so it might be as simple as Korn being Pol's family's landlord. Maybe they've been tenants of his for a long time, since his dad was still in charge; maybe they were part of the first territory he controlled while he was working his way up. At any rate, at some point when Pol was growing up Korn said "I have a job for your son if he wants it;" now Pol lives in the fancy house, has nice clothes and all his meals provided, and makes more money than his parents do by a long shot. He's the only one of the main bodyguard squad with a good relationship with his family (Pete and his grandma notwithstanding), which is why he's always on the shared phone.

Thanks for the ask! It was fun to write all this out after carrying it in my head for so long!

[chaos-and-recover]

I dunno if I am venting, asking aita, or asking advice or am I overreacting but you're probably the only person I follow who is old (I am 17 and most people I follow are around that age) so here goes. so I have this cousin who my whole family hates and has spent my whole life saying horrible things about. This cousin literally moved across the country (we are in the USA) and everyone says that she moved away because she was tired of our family calling her out on her abusive behavior. (Cont)

Okay, wow. This is a doozy. I'm gonna answer all the messages in this series probably in chunks (but in this one post) 'cause there's a lot to say here and I think it makes sense so I can interject thoughts as I go and address all the various things going on here. First off, based on this first message, I'm kind of on your cousin's side. I'd probably also move across the country if my entire family talked shit about me all the time.

I grew up hearing how she's awful, a bitch, unhygienic, house is a hoarding disaster of filth, etc, like she's not a good person. Anyway despite living so far away she's managed to come to important events like weddings and funerals. Now I notice that any time someone calls her out, like asks how smelly her house is, if she's keeping it clean, or if her friend(s?) still put up with her, she has a really nasty insult ready and it's been like that my whole life so I believe it. (Cont)

Okay so, obviously I don't know her so she might be all of those things, but does your family have examples of her shitty behaviour beyond being unhygienic and possibly a hoarder? Because those things, to me, don't match up with "she's a bitch" and "she's awful," but being a bitch might be an understandable reaction to people giving you crap about the way you live. And hoarding in particular is very often a symptom of a larger mental health issue. Asking if her friends "still put up with her" is rude as fuck too, like so far your family kind of sound like bullies.

Anyway so last year a relative got married and my cousin showed up. My cousin is in her late 30s idk exactly. So my aunt (also her aunt) points out that maybe if she hadn't been a bitch and took better care of herself she would be married. She said she was happy in her relationship life but we all immediately pointed out she wasn't in a relationship so she should stop lying. (Cont)

As someone at the tail end of their 30s who is unmarried this is a WILDLY inappropriate thing to say. There are a million reasons why someone might not be married in their 30s, not least of which is "they don't want to be." I also think it's either a generational or a cultural thing that people just don't get married in their 20s as much anymore -- generational because my parents were 20 and 24 got married but both of my siblings were in their early 30s, two of my best friends didn't get married until they were 34 and 35, respectively, and for a variety of reasons I have a ton of other friends in their 30s who are not married at all. Some people just don't get married! Some people don't get married until it makes financial sense (either actually paying for the wedding or something more practical like joint tax filing. It actually doesn't always make sense to file as a couple). But I also wonder if that's just a cultural thing because it certainly seems that getting married in your 20s is still something a lot of people do in some regions of the US and in some other cultures, so I don't know. But I do think it's no one else's fucking business why someone else isn't married (for me it's because I straight up cannot be bothered dating and do not want to alter my life and my routine to make room for another person lmao so that makes getting married a bit of a challenge). Also even if she was not in a relationship (later messages make it clear that's apparently not the case) you CAN be perfectly happy being single. Like, I am absolutely happy with my non-existent dating life and relationship status. So accusing her of lying about being happy because you think she's single is bonkers, frankly. Being in a relationship doesn't automatically make you happy, and you don't need a romantic relationship in order to be happy.

She said we clearly knew nothing about her, that she isn't messy, is happy with how she looks, and we need to stop lying about her hygiene and other things. Now I personally have never thought she smelled bad but I only see her at big events so ofc she wouldn't. Anyway the wedding had alcohol so we all got really drunk (including me, but including her also so she can't judge) and things got heated between her and my mom (Cont)

So okay. I want you to think about this. Your family says she's smelly and unhygienic but you've never observed that yourself, so why do you believe them? Maybe she does only clean up for family events, but if that's the only time you see her, do you know that's true? Do you have any reason, beyond what your family has said, to actually think she does have hygiene issues? This might also be a mental health issue, fyi. There are a ton of reasons someone might not be "clean." There are also a lot of physical conditions that might cause someone to smell "bad." And it is, frankly, not anybody's business.

As for the drinking, yeah getting sloppy drunk isn't a good look but it also happens at weddings. I'm neutral on that point, tbh.

(my mom cheated on my dad and my cousin told everybody and that's how my dad found out I'm not kid but that's a long story) anyway so she got kicked out of the wedding and took an uber to the hotel. The next day I went to the hotel and we were both hungover so maybe not in the best mood. when I talked to her she told me that our family was abusive and toxic and I pointed out it's unrealistic that everyone in the whole family except her is abusive (cont) so maybe she needs to logically look at herself and realize it's more believable that only she is lying instead of everyone except her. And she just said I should research family scapegoats. I told her that it was her fault my parents divorced and my dad doesn't pay child support and she told me to leave. Well I felt kinda bad and so a few days later when she was back home I messaged her about what she'd like for a wedding because that's what ppl talk about after a wedding. (Cont)

She's right about the family scapegoat. It's not uncommon for abusive people to target one person and not another. Like, a parent may be abusive toward one kid, but not another, and they may turn others against that one kid, cause resentment, and ruin one kid's life while their sibling(s) may think they have a great childhood. It sucks! But it's absolutely a real abuse tactic. In your family's case I think it's pretty likely everyone didn't get together and decide to be shitheads to your cousin, but it started SOMEWHERE, it sounds like SOMEONE turned everyone against her.

I will say she shouldn't have told everyone your mom had an affair, but it's straight up not her fault your parents divorced. Your parents divorced because your mom cheated. It sucks! I'm sorry you had to go through that. She should keep her mouth shut about things that aren't her business (if she knew and no one else did, telling your dad might have been acceptable depending on the circumstances/relationship, but not spreading gossip to everyone else. That's not cool).

She said a bunch of stuff and then mentioned that her wedding would be a dry wedding. I pointed out that she was being hypocritical and a bridezilla because nobody wants to go to a dry wedding AND I know she drinks PLUS she got wasted like everybody else at our most recent wedding. And she said that since it was allowed then it's not hypocritical but that as I wasn't old enough to drink then it wouldn't matter anyway. (Cont)

Getting sloppy drunk at one wedding and then having a dry wedding yourself isn't really hypocritical. There are a lot of reasons someone might have a dry wedding, from money (open bars are expensive and cash bars are kinda tacky imo) to someone involved with/at the wedding in recovery for alcohol addiction to just not wanting people to get sloppy. I do think a dry wedding is probably gonna reduce the number of people who want to go but that might also be the goal.

Now granted I did lose my temper and tell her that it wasn't like she ever had to worry about getting married anyway because nobody loved her and since it hadn't happened for her yet then she should accept it wouldn't ever. I will admit that I reacted badly to that. She then told me to go and then blocked me. Well I have two accounts (one I made before I was 13 but I said i was 21 so I could have a fb and she followed me on both)well lo and behold six months ago she announces shes engaged (cont)

Yeah that wasn't cool, honestly. But also if I had a younger cousin who said something like that I'd probably be like "yeah ok kid sure" so like she could've probably reacted better.

I message her asking for an invite and she reminds me that it's a dry wedding and I said that's ok. She says she's not sure she wants me to come based on my behavior but she'll think about it. Well I notice that nowhere on any of her social media does she talk about her fiance or boyfriend at all, except to say who she is marrying and it's her best friend, who lives where she moved. I message him (we don't follow each other) cont I'm like how long have you been dating and why haven't you said anything on social media. He says they've been together for years but they're both private people. I don't know anything about him beyond that they've been friends (dating?) for like almost 15 or more years or smth. She only ever talked about him like a friend. Which I thought was weird. But I keep that to myself. Well because she always made it to all weddings and funerals I say yes I'd like to go. (Cont)

This might also be a bit of a generational disconnect. She's roughly my age and while our generation definitely had some early forms of social media by high school, we didn't grow up on it the same way younger generations did and the concept of sharing EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME is still a little foreign to us. Either that or we did the oversharing every aspect of our lives in our teens/early 20s and are now pulling back from that. It seems like every day more and more people I know are leaving FB and other social media platforms. Years ago when I was seeing someone he went to change his relationship status to 'in a relationship' with me after like 2 dates and I had to be like "whoa hold on there bro." I hadn't even mentioned to my family that I was seeing someone (because TWO DATES). Some people just don't put all their business on social media.

So I get an invite and so i invite the whole family. We show up but she has no room for us and said she only sent out a few invites but since I got invited I told everyone where the wedding was. Her fiance was there and kinda stepped in but it never got heated or anything but he showed us cheap hotels because they just didn't have room for everyone and they weren't expecting that many people. But when I was in the house I noticed it looked clean and smelled normal. (Cont)

Okay you're young so I'll chalk this up to not knowing what goes in to planning a wedding but DON'T DO THIS. Weddings are expensive and they are also planned down to the very last detail, INCLUDING having EXACT numbers for catering. You're basically buying dinner for all your guests, and it can be expensive. If you're having a buffet-style or more casual wedding you might have extra food but in a lot of cases the caterers are preparing the meals for the people who have RSVP'd and there won't be a ton of extra food just in case. You can't just add a bunch of extra people at the last minute because there won't be enough food, and in this case, not enough space. Most wedding invites have you choose your meal when you RSVP so they make sure they have enough of each option for everyone. If your invite says +1 you can bring a guest, otherwise you don't. You DO NOT invite a bunch of random people, especially family who don't even like this person and weren't invited for a reason (why would they even want to go if they all hate her so much?)

Also, you were in her house and it was clean and didn't smell, consider why you still believe your family who say she's unhygienic.

My family is clearly angry but they're not psycho so they keep it to themselves when he drives us there. So her and fiance ask to talk with me alone at a diner and give me a talk about how I wasn't supposed to invite everyone which offended me because they're family but I have never met him so I don't want to be rude. They both say they've managed to work it out and had extra food so it was okay this time but that in case other people get married or future events I should be aware that this behavior isn't acceptable. Which yes got my hackles raised but i'm trying to be nice. Well anyway at some point she had to leave for a hair appointment and needs to go but I am not done eating so she takes an Uber and he eats until I'm done eating before taking me back to the hotel. I take the alone time to bring up like hey do you know the woman you're about to marry is abusive and toxic and that he deserves better than someone he has to remind to shower and clean up after and someone who is kind and I just blurt out that she's a hypocrite who got sloppy drunk and I'm like I don't know how often she's lied to you about what kind of person she is and that he should know how toxic she is and to his credit he listened but then he asks why do you think her family wasn't invited, because they're abusive, and then asks what my goal was in talking shit about his future wife to him as soon as she's out of earshot and asks if I talk this way about everybody who isn't in the room with me. And I point out it's more logical that she is the abusive liar, not literally everyone else except her. And then he says she's always been loving and kind, cleans a normal amount, and as far as he's been around her taken care of her hygiene and that even when he visited the home she grew up in it was clean and that he will not listen to me talk about her like that anymore. When I get back to the hotel I tell my family everything and they came uncorked and kept calling her and texting her and so they rescinded all our invitations. We all pointed out that we spent a lot of money to get there and she said that wasn't her problem and then blocked all of us. I tried to show up to the wedding but was told to either leave on my own or be escorted by the police so I left. I didn't know this but my family showed up after me and stuff went down but i dont know what because nobody will tell me. Anyway so after the wedding I tried to contact her through multiple means but i was blocked on all of them as we all were. She did post a few videos publicly for everyone to see, so I had a mutual friend who wasn't blocked but didn't attend the wedding show me the videos and the wedding was very cheap and small. But that is what she told me she wanted last year. I tried talking to her siblings but her siblings also blocked me. I tried talking to some relatives of her now husband but they didn't respond to me, and i may have lost my temper and said cruel things so they all blocked me without responding. I made a few accounts and emails contacting them again asking for evidence of her claims but nobody ever responded but I was able to send emails. (Cont)

Yeah I'm on the cousin and her fiance's side still. He sounds like a decent guy standing up for his future wife. And if he has in fact known her for 15 years, he DOES know what kind of person she is. I think it's clear you meant well in warning him about what you've heard about her your whole life, but I think you should consider that your family aren't always the good guys in every situation. Even people you love can be wrong and cruel. I think if you can go through the trouble of making additional accounts to ask her siblings for evidence of her claims (you should stop, btw. They blocked you because they don't want to discuss it, leave them be) you should also maybe ask the family you do speak to for actual evidence of her being an awful person and being filthy and smelly (which, again... nobody's business, and not a reason to be nasty to someone???).

I think, based on what I've read here, it comes down to this: your family does not like this cousin and they make no secret of it. Why on earth would she tell them anything, invite them to major events like her wedding, or be anything other than nasty to them in return???

[gemsofgreece]

greeks are indeed the main issue when it comes to spread the greek language. I live in germany and also went to a Greek school a few times a week in the afternoon (after my normal German school) and although my greek isn't perfect I dare to say I was still the best pupil speaking it bc my parents were of the few ones only speaking in Greek to me. most other parents spoke either a mix of Greek and German or straight up only German w them. partially it wasn't the parents' fault as they were 2nd gen greeks living there so they grew up in Germany, too and their parents also didn't really bother speaking to them fully greek, in an attempt to merge w their new home country and the culture (as it often happens w immigrant families). wasn't much different w my Italian neighbors either where the kids barely spoke/understood Italian. but then I see people from other countries/ continents only speaking in their native language to their kids no matter what and I'm like, why can't greeks be like this, too? I know greek isn't always the easiest especially when living in a different country. but if other immigrants manage keeping their native languages along w learning/speaking German, why can't we? or worse, they come up w new words like μπροτάκια. a mix of the German word "Brot" (bread) and the greek word ψωμάκια (buns), essentially meaning buns w it but instead of using the greek word they just mixed it w the German one 🙃 like the amount of times I met greeks (in my age) but they could barely speak greek is alarming. and it's obviously the parents/grandparents' fault. my grandpa has relatives in South Germany and when he asked them if they speak greek to their grandchildren they said no. and he told them "they're gonna learn German in school anyway. what they're not going to learn there is greek! so speak greek to them!" and I think he is right. sure you can still be and feel greek even without speaking it by just keeping traditions and other cultural stuff alive. but speaking the language helps you connect w all this and other greeks in a deeper way. so speak greek to your kids! please! it's such a nice language, it's a pity!

(sorry for the long message. just needed to vent about my personal experience a little)

Thank you for this message! I have no insight what the Greek immigrant (or just immigrant)’s experience with struggling to preserve the heritage is like but it must definitely be tough work. I understand second generation parents who don’t succeed much in teaching the mother tongue to their kids. But first generation? That’s straight out problematic. I believe your grandpa is right. Besides, it is absolutely possible for kids to learn more than one language - if a kid can learn English and another foreign language besides, say, German then they are perfectly capable of learning their own ethnic language too. If they don’t, then apparently the parents have failed or intentionally didn’t make it clear to the children what the significance of this is.

A kid desn’t understand concepts like heritage, roots, culture very well. If the parents try to teach the language as a chore or as a form of ethical obligation, it might not succeed. They should treat the language learning as something natural or obvious or if that’s not easy then as something fascinating or useful IMO. Because I have received mail from Greeks of the diaspora who weren’t taught Greek well by their family and they realise they want to know it only in late puberty or adulthood, when the aforementioned concepts are better understood. This is generally something that usually interests people when they grow and mature. But when a lot of time has passed people often make the mistake to feel that maybe they lost their chance or the cord is cut for good now or that they wouldn’t be able to get connected on a deeper level even if they tried. Which is wrong of course, you can (re)gain the lost touch at any age as long as you genuinely try to. But the neglect or avoidance of the parents (for whatever reason) in this matter makes it so much more difficult for their offspring later.

This of course applies to all immigrants struggling with the preservation of their language and culture. The immigrants you mentioned, who still succeed a lot in that are probably ones where tradition and religion have a very strong influence in the structure of their family / society so it is necessary for them. Not always, but usually, I think.

[mariacallous]

Georgia is home to 11 endangered languages, according to UNESCO. Like standard Georgian, three of these belong to the Kartvelian language family. But unlike the country’s primary language, Megrelian (or Mingrelian), Svan, and Laz do not enjoy official status or protection. Nor are there official figures on the exact number of speakers, due in part to persistent fears that promoting smaller Kartvelian languages could fuel linguistic nationalism or, worse, separatism. For Georgians, separatism is not an abstract concept: the country fought bitter wars in the early 1990s in Abkhazia and South Ossetia, two breakaway regions that Russia occupied as the result of another war in 2008. Moscow’s habit of instigating and exploiting separatist sentiment in neighboring countries only causes more concern. That said, language advocates maintain that their cause has nothing to do with secession and everything to do with preserving Georgia’s cultural heritage.

This story first appeared in The Beet, a weekly email dispatch from Meduza covering Central and Eastern Europe, the Caucasus, and Central Asia. Sign up here to get the next issue delivered directly to your inbox.

In July 2023, a new translation of the Bible was released in Georgia — the first edition ever published in the Megrelian language. Completed at the independent initiative of Giorgi Sakhokia, a 75-year-old Megrelian speaker, the translation sparked debate on social media. Since the Bible is already available in the Georgian language, critics wondered, why is this translation necessary at all?

Like Georgian, Megrelian is part of the Kartvelian language family, along with Svan and Laz. While many linguists consider these separate languages, Georgians often refer to the latter three as dialects. But the mutual intelligibility between Megrelian and Georgian is very low, Thomas Wier, an assistant professor of linguistics at Free University of Tbilisi, told The Beet.

According to the 2021 Caucasus Barometer survey, seven percent of Georgians speak Megrelian in daily life. The number of Megrelian speakers in Georgia is estimated at around 300,000 people, most of whom reside in the western Samegrelo region on the Black Sea coast. Yet, the language has no official status and, as a result, remains primarily a spoken language, seldom used in writing.

Melor Shengelia was born in Samegrelo’s regional capital, Zugdidi, and has spoken Megrelian with his family since childhood. But his younger relatives are no longer learning the language, he says. The generation of children growing up in the region today are becoming what’s known as “passive speakers,” meaning their parents speak to them in Megrelian, but they respond in Georgian — the language they see in the media, speak with friends, and study in school.

“[Parents] prefer that their kids know Georgian, and kids prefer to know English to use TikTok. [...] Everything is in English or in Georgian,” said Maka Chitanava, who’s also from Zugdidi and speaks Megrelian with her close family members.

The declining use of Megrelian has led UNESCO to designate the language as “definitely endangered.” This classification signifies that children “no longer learn the language as a mother tongue at home,” raising fears that it may eventually disappear.

“My nephews are seven or eight years younger than me and when they start speaking Megrelian, it’s so broken, they make so many mistakes,” said Shengelia, who’s 25 years old. “Even though they can understand, they can't speak properly. That means that their children won't be able to speak Megrelian.”

‘Languages die out, domain by domain’

Most Georgians rarely encounter smaller Kartvelian languages in their daily lives. Natia Liluashvili, who grew up in Georgia’s Imereti region, heard Megrelian for the first time while on a school trip to Samegrelo when she was about 14 years old. The fact that she couldn’t understand the language people were speaking around her was a shock. 

“When I came [to Zugdidi] and was walking down the street, I knew I was still in Georgia — but people were speaking a different language,” Liluashvili recalled. “I couldn't understand anything.” 

She also remembers singing songs in Megrelian at school, although she didn’t understand the words. 

Shengelia says he often encounters people in Tbilisi, Georgia’s capital, who are surprised to learn that his family speaks Megrelian at home. “Even though everyone knows that Megrelian people speak Megrelian, it’s still kind of surprising for them,” he told The Beet. “They just don't have that much information about [it].”

Then there’s the fact that the vast majority of Megrelian speakers are bilingual. As a result, they tend to code switch, alternating languages based on the circumstances or listener at hand. Shengelia, who has lived in Tbilisi for six years, typically speaks Georgian unless he meets another Megrelian speaker. In Samegrelo, he uses Megrelian with his family and friends, and in places like the grocery store, but he opts for Georgian when he’s in what he deems more “formal” spaces such as a bank, a government institution, or a hospital.

“Languages typically don't die out all at once. They die out, domain by domain, whether you use it in public, school, or at the doctor’s office,” Wier explained.

Over time, Georgian loan words have also made their way into the Megrelian language. According to Timothy Blauvelt, a professor of Soviet and Post-Soviet Studies at Ilia State University in Tbilisi, this is due to the limited written documentation of the language, which leads Megrelian speakers to fill in their vocabulary gaps with borrowed words.

“This is one of the biggest problems for the Megrelian language. It has so many Georgian and Russian words, even though there are actual words in Megrelian [with] the same meaning,” Shengelia said. “Sometimes when my grandmother and grandfather say [certain] words, I’m surprised; I didn’t think we had a word for that.”

Svan song

Unexpected events can suddenly and drastically alter linguistic communities. The steep decline of the Svan language is a prime example, Wier told The Beet. 

In 1987, a series of avalanches devastated Georgia’s mountainous Svaneti region, damaging Svan villages and killing 85 people. The Soviet authorities decided to evacuate 16,000 residents, most of whom were Svan speakers. Around 2,500 families were resettled elsewhere in Georgia, and the Svan language became endangered in a matter of years. The migration of Georgian and Megrelian speakers into Svaneti, who communicate with Svan speakers in Georgian, further exacerbated language loss in the region.

UNESCO classified Svan as “definitely endangered” in 2011. But Wier fears the language is now at risk of going extinct. “If there’s not a systematic sea change for the Svan language in terms of people’s attitudes and in terms of government funding and aid to communities, I think this one will die out, because its current status has just so drastically declined in just the last 30 years,” he said.

Teaching Georgia’s endangered languages in schools is one possible remedy: Chitanava believes that Megrelian should be taught in the Samegrelo region at least. “In Georgian language classes, we could have a few topics devoted to the Megrelian and Svan languages and maybe also Laz,” she suggested. “So kids can understand how these languages are related, what is interesting about these languages, and that it’s [part of] their cultural heritage.”  

Georgian President Salome Zourabichvili has expressed support for teaching Megrelian and Svan in schools. But overall, there’s little political will to provide any government assistance for these endangered languages, primarily due to the association of linguistic identity with ethnicity and, by extension, the belief that granting language rights could spark separatist sentiment.

According to Givi Karchava, the co-founder of the Megrelian Language Association, this attitude is one of the biggest challenges his organization faces — besides a lack of funding. “Any type of activity which shows Megrelian as equal to the Georgian language [...] is understood as separatism,” he said.

The prospect of Georgia signing the European Language Charter, which would mandate the necessary steps to protect and promote minority languages, provokes similar concerns, experts told The Beet. 

“There’s basically all these fears about the territorial disintegration of Georgia that some people have,” said David Sichinava, an adjunct research professor at Carleton University. The debate around language rights, he explained, triggers anxieties about a possible domino effect wherein minority populations demand greater autonomy. “That’s a challenge that perhaps is causing these languages [to be neglected],” Sichinava surmised.

“My personal opinion is that signing the document [the European Language Charter] or ratifying it is too politically charged and probably will be for a long time,” Blauvelt said.

A historical legacy

The widespread fear of separatism in Georgia stems from recent history, namely, the 1991–1993 Georgian Civil War, which saw intense fighting between Tbilisi and the separatist regions of Abkhazia and South Ossetia, and the 2008 war with Russia, when Moscow occupied the breakaway territories. 

These wars significantly impacted the distribution of Megrelian speakers. The hostilities in Abkhazia in the 1990s displaced more than 200,000 people, including tens of thousands of Megrelian-speaking Georgians who fled to neighboring Samegrelo and other regions. The 2008 war also caused large-scale displacement.

Melor Shengelia’s mother fled Abkhazia’s capital, Sokhumi, during the war in the 1990s and then moved to Samegrelo. Shengelia’s grandfather stayed behind to defend the family home. “People have this fear of separatism, [but] they have to remember that Megrelians were the people who were fighting for Abkhazia [to remain part of Georgia],” Shengelia recalled. “They don’t have any intention to separate from the rest of the Georgians.”

That said, the understanding of language as intrinsically linked to ethnicity has deep roots in Georgia, going back to the Soviet Union’s nationality policy, Blauvelt told The Beet. First introduced in the 1920s, this “nation-building” program assigned officially recognized ethnic groups — referred to as “nationalities” — their own territories within the USSR and promoted national languages through culture and education. (This policy was rolled back in the 1930s, giving way to political purges, deportations of groups deemed “enemy nations,” and Russification).

“The Soviet understanding is really still fundamental in shaping the way people view their own identity [and] why they view national identity as something primordial, something unchanging,” Blauvelt explained. “This question of dialect and language, and where these minority languages fit, is so politically charged, because it’s ultimately part of those discourses of ’national greatness’ and national identity.”

The authorities in Georgia haven’t recorded Megrelian speakers as a distinct group since the 1926 Soviet census. And when Russia added this category to its own census in 2010, only 600 respondents identified as Megrelians. 

‘We shouldn’t sacrifice our cultural heritage’

Shengelia says it’s fundamentally misguided to fear that promoting Megrelian could lead to separatism. “The Megrelian language belongs to Georgia and all Georgian people. By underlining that it’s only the language of Megrelian speakers, you are promoting this kind of separation,” he argued. “Megrelian speakers don't think that it’s only their language.” 

According to Sichinava, activists working to preserve Megrelian and Svan also share this view. “What’s important and what’s so interesting is that none of those activists say that we are different peoples. They say, ‘We want to preserve the language, but we are Georgian,’” he noted. 

The Beet’s other sources also felt that identity politics shouldn’t impede efforts to keep Georgia’s endangered languages alive.

Despite the challenges, Chitanava believes that shifting attitudes in recent years may increase the odds of maintaining Georgia’s language diversity. “Thirty years have already passed since our independence and our war in Abkhazia. I think this pain and fear of the country’s disintegration is less [prevalent],” she told The Beet. “We shouldn’t sacrifice our cultural heritage to these fears and phobias.”

Although not a Megrelian speaker, Liluashvili said that she supports initiatives to preserve the language — including the possibility of teaching it in schools — because it’s part of Georgia’s heritage. “It's our culture. Especially when we are such a small country, we should protect and save our diversity,” she said. “Language is one of the most important parts of diversity.”

For now, however, efforts to preserve Georgia’s smaller Kartvelian languages are concentrated at the grassroots level. In 2018, software developer Hary Kodua created an online Megrelian-Georgian dictionary to make the language more accessible to young people. At this writing, the dictionary contains 120,000 words. 

In 2020, Givi Karchava and Giga Kavtaradze founded the Megrelian Language Association with the goal of “saving the Megrelian language from disappearing.” Today, the group publishes Megrelian-language books, runs a magazine, and coordinates seminars. 

Megrelian and Svan self-study books are also available, as is a Megrelian version of Wikipedia and translations of well-known fiction, such as the Georgian epic The Knight in the Panther’s Skin. 

Karchava himself translated George Orwell’s Animal Farm and Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s The Little Prince into Megrelian. “Georgian society and the state are more tolerant toward the Megrelian language now,” he told The Beet. “Let’s see what happens next. We are full of hope.”

[mr-saturnnn]

Omg Christopher's backstory??? I wonder what other people think lol :)

np!!!

Christopher is the only child in his family because of his genetics since his parents didn't want albinos anymore

Christopher is not the only albino in his family, he got it from his grandmother

Therefore, Chris always had a tense and cold relationship with his parents who looked like ordinary people

I see Pierres as a clan of evil spirits, they all have that dark form like Chris himself, as he's a descendant of aristocrats

(Also they moved from France to US and Canada, Crispy has many relatives in all these countries, and he was born and raised in US and he's bilingual)

Since all his family look like ordinary people, they hide their belonging to evil spirits and their supernatural abilities

Chris was often pressured for albinism and his strange behavior that didn't meet other people's expectations

Moreover, he saw no point in hiding his identity. He could never understand this attitude towards himself

Christopher likes to troll his family at that, however it doesn't affect mental health very well, and Chris' relationship with his relatives is close to unbearable

Christopher never liked that his family lived exclusively in the inner circle of their clan. Being street-raised is another extreme and escapism. But nonetheless

Chris treats only a couple of cousins and nephews without passive aggression. Who possibly were close to him in childhood. Other relatives are not welcomed by him

Christopher went to the school theater club together with Candle Queen aka Chloe. They usually fought for the right to play leading roles, and caused the most fuss and drama in the club

He graduated from the theater university and thus proved that he could achieve everything despite his albinism and eccentric behavior

Crispy uses a unique vocabulary, has artistry. He loves literature, especially The Picture of Dorian Gray

When he grew up, he remained loyal to his roots and fell in love with high style and high refined cuisine. His house, inherited from his parents, is also decorated in a near-Gothic style from the inside

Christopher's parents moved closer to the rest of the family, and Chris was left alone in a place of joy and just happily lives for his own pleasure

Christopher's family says that he was always out of his mind. From childhood, they tried to take him not really serious because he behaved differently than expected. A stereotype of him as a crazy and out of sorts boy has been settled. So they justify all the actions of Pierre Jr. solely by this and ~are not surprised~ every time he acts (but they still don't hide their disappointment)

here i talked about his albinism and vision problems as i see it

thanks for asking!!! I probably should make a list of my all existing headcanons

[donatellokinnersinner]

Its disability pride month, or so I've heard.

So I wanted to share things I've experienced.

I have 4 biological brothers (3 full, 1 half) and 2 of them are autistic. The first was 2 years younger than me with AuDHD, bipolar, and SPD. The other is 10 years younger than me (the half brother) with only Autism and SPD. I also have an older brother with ADHD.

I'm in the middle of the group, with Autism as well (aspergers, but it's not called that anymore.) I was the one that wasnt diagnosed, only getting any kind of treatment for Depression and PTSD when I was a freshman in high school. I think it was cause they never had a basis of comparison. I didnt have sisters that were considered "normal" I just had myself, and I was who I was. Everything was chalked up to me being a girl.

I didnt quite understand it, but we tried to adapt to my brothers behavior (the youngest lived with Bio Mom). The closer younger brother (let's call him T) had moderate Autism, while in comparison, mine is Mild. He had incredibly sensitive ears, a lack of self control, an oral fixation from hell and an intense interest in Thomas the Train. He couldnt make emotional connections, often telling us that he didnt love us the way we loved him, and he cared more about his friend at school. He stole food, took things apart, wet the bed, and supposedly forced my parents to make our house a prison.

My step mom got depression really bad, and couldnt handle him anymore. There were only 3 of us left living at home. Me, T, and my sibling L who moved out as soon as they graduated that year. Mom went to dad and told him that she needed him to help take care of his son.

Dad refused, and sent T to live with our Bio Mom across the country.

Bio Mom was incredibly narcissistic, valedictorian in law school the year prior to this. She claimed her children only for their successes. My older brother with ADHD (well call him P) was an exact replica of her and had moved in with her the year before cause of a fight with Dad.

And T, who couldnt make emotional connections, moved in with two people who would lash out if they were not given the love they felt they deserved.

T, who couldnt give them the love they felt they deserved.

A year later, I woke up to my oldest sister getting a phone call that he'd passed peacefully in his sleep, according to Bio Mom. She had called our oldest brother to tell everyone cause "she was too heartbroken."

That was her one phone call from jail after what authorities say was "the most gruesome and violent child abuse case theyd ever seen." That was the same day P got arrested later for hanging around the house of a crime scene, and evidence was found on his phone of the "punishments" he gave T when Bio Mom was out of the house, sending them to her for confirmation.

He died from starvation and hypothermia. The woman the birthed him gave him horrendous punishments, locking and shackling him in a closet on a tarp. Putting him in an ice bath the day before cause he couldnt move and she thought he was faking it. When he left my house, he was nearly 180lbs, and grew up to almost 6 feet tall. When he died he was 69lbs.

That was the morning of July 6, 2022.

That was one year ago today.

I found out I was autistic after this, and I couldnt help but hate it at first. I thought I'd end up like him, unable to give a reasonable response and leave my oldest brother with another missing sibling. I buried myself in research, trying to find ways to improve my social skills and emotional maturity. I restarted therapy, and developed an anxiety disorder that has caused me to lose 20lbs in the past year.

And today, one year later, I'm okay with it.

I'm not okay with my family, only really talking to my oldest brother out of my blood related relatives.

I'm not okay with the two blood related people still part of an ongoing trial, because Bio Mom has managed to push the court dare another 3 months.

I'm not okay with the only thing I have left of my little brother, a train necklace with his ashes in it.

I'm not okay with the way even in death, they took three months to plan a funeral, forcing that boys older brother to plan the whole thing instead of the parents that gave up on him.

But I'm okay with myself. Even if it's hard and I struggle and I still hurt, I'm okay with sharing something else with him. I'm okay with beginning to understand through studying psychology how he worked and how to help myself work.

Disability pride month for me is mourning and understanding. Its hate towards those too blind to see what we fight for. Its realizing that despite everything I've struggled with the past year, I can still thrive.

This is only the start of my story, and I'm starting to gain speed, chugging along the tracks impatiently awaiting the day I can hug him again.

But I'm fine with waiting, I still have things I need to do.

[some-eldritch-bats]

Gentiles do not fucking Get that like... Jews have thousands (literally) of years of intergenerational trauma around Not Having A Homeland. Like, there has never once been a place, since the destruction of the Temple, where Jews were unambiguously welcome. Where Jews were not present explicitly on sufferance, with the clear and present understanding that this sufferance WAS limited. Not "might be" limited. Not "could be limited if a new leader gets into power". Literally just was ALWAYS, FOREVER limited. Jews were NEVER going to be welcomed, and they were never going to be tolerated for long.

So, Jewish culture is a long list of, "be subject to another genocide > survivors move to a new country > survivors are tolerated as a small but taxable minority > survivors become relatively successful > new country suddenly sees Jews as a source of easily-stolen wealth and nobody else around them will care because it's just the fucking k*kes like who gives a shit if we kill 'em > be subject to a new genocide". That's just how Jewish culture has been for centuries. For millennia. Over 2,000 years of knowing that you have nowhere and no-one in your corner.

So, Jews everywhere - yes, even anti-Zionist ones like me - have this like... ingrained cultural fear that, at some point, our time will run out again, and a corresponding desire to see Israel survive because while it survives, so do we. Our stay of execution in the diaspora has never lasted for long. We've never had more than a few decades of acceptance. It's literally one of the reasons my family moved countries: we wanted to get a new citizenship under our belts because my dad wasn't convinced we'd be safe if we only had one. We always need somewhere to run to.

Israel is... not just the fulfilment of a promise, it's survival. To so many Jews, there's a profound lack of trust in anyone else to protect us. We have NEVER been able to rely on anyone else before, why start now? Israel views all outsiders as either threats, or potential threats. That's because historically, that has always been true for Jews. Everyone was either an active threat, or simply a potential threat. Nobody was safe. Never.

It's another reason why Jews, especially Orthodox Jews, cling to their traditions so tightly: it's the one thing they can't take away from us. They can take our land, they can take our homes, they can take our lives, but they can't take our Jewishness. So we hold onto all the little pieces we can hold onto, and if we're forced into hiding then we take those things with us even when we forget why we do them.

I am Sephardi, not Ashkenazi. My ancestors were from Spain and Portugal and North Africa, and fled the Spanish Inquisition when it came hunting for Christians who didn't pray right and Jews who didn't convert. My ancestors ran, but not everyone did. Some people converted, truly and honestly, and became Christians... but many others converted in name only. They put up statuettes of the saints, and they kept them nice and shiny and pretty for when the Inquisition came knocking, and under the floorboards they kept the Hanukkah lights and the Torah scrolls. They learnt the Bible, they told their children to say they were good Catholics, and they never ate pork and they used all the old spices and they kept their day of rest on "Saturday" by just shifting the calendar around so that everyone else's Sunday was their own Saturday. They spoke their own language at home - as Ashkenazim have Yiddish, we have Ladino - and they raised their children to be fluent in both tongues to keep the ways safe.

And... those kids? The ones raised to say they were Catholic? They grew up. And many parents took the attitude that, in order to protect them from slipping up, they would never tell the children the name "Jew". They would never tell them what they themselves truly were, because children are young and stupid and don't know how to keep a secret. Their identities were safest if they were kept safe even from themselves, and many of those parents died before they got a chance to tell the children who and what they were. Many others were told, but chose to continue the lies, and raised their own children the same way. They raised them to never know the name "Jew", but to keep their homes Kosher, to follow the Mitzvah, to light a candle in the window and to observe their day of rest. They attended their Masses, they read Latin and venerated the saints, and in all respects they were the model Catholics... but they never stopped practising the old ways.

And this never stopped.

And so, we get the crypto-Jews of Spain and Portugal, the Sephardis who do not know they are Sephardis. They still, centuries later, speak a "strange dialect" that people around them do not understand and they themselves could not tell you where it comes from. In the middle of a Spanish town where preserved bacon and hams are everywhere, you will find no pork in their butchers. They still light their lamps, they still pray before entering their homes, and they do not know why.

You can kill the Jews, but you can't kill the Jewishness. They could erase even the name, but could not erase the history and the culture.

And... that's just normal for Jews. That's not even that rare, this is just my little slice of Jewish history. Crypto-Jews are everywhere, from every tradition, and it's because of how fucking common it was to just up and fucking slaughter Jews that some families decided, "we will not let this be how our culture dies. We will find another way."

Israel represents, to so so many Jews, the promise to never need to do that again. To never again need to tell your children to "say that you are Catholic". The promise to never need to hide the Torah under the floorboards where the mice can shit on it. It represents a place where not just Jewishness but open Jewishness will survive. Where not just culture but people will survive. Where children can be told literally what fucking ethnicity they actually ARE.

So

Yeah. This is not something people fucking understand. Israel isn't going to stop this, because to them Palestine will ALWAYS represent an existential threat. Palestine's very name on others' tongues represents a threat, because it means that once again Jews are not welcome in their own homeland. I cannot stress enough - and it sickens me that I have to say this, but I do - that I do not actually agree with this stance? Like, the state of Israel as it currently exists is a colonialist nightmare-state that is built largely or entirely off stolen land and oppressed people. But like... I understand the reasons why the Jews involved feel motivated to do this. To them, this is existential. Palestine's very name is seen as a danger.

When Zionists say "to be pro-Palestinian is to be anti-Semitic", they aren't being like... facetious? They're not saying "oh, this is a great way to get people off-kilter!" They sincerely believe it, because to them it is existentially threatening Israel, and threatening Israel means that you are, once again, trying to kick Jews out of their only home. Zionists believe that Israel is a necessary precondition to Jews being seen as equal or safe, so threatening Israel is anti-Semitic, and being pro-Palestinian is threatening Israel.

I was raised anti-Zionist and I still absorbed this shit. Imagine how the pro-Zionists were raised.

jesus fucking christ

[michellestrof555]

Between two worlds

We were born in a country where winter bites. But in our hearts we carry a sun from far away, a memory from our parents who came here young, with empty hands and eyes full of future. They came without language, without support, without a family to look after, to seek advice from.

They worked two jobs, burned themselves out, so that we would feel safe and not feel different. And we grew up in their dream of something better but also in their worry, their loss, their lost world. We were taught two languages, two songs, two cultures and neither of them ever became our own. They wanted to give us everything they themselves lost, built a future with toil and quiet pride.

Saved every penny, turned off the heat in the winter so we could return to the land they called "home".

Home to Chile where our roots extended, where we spent summers in a different heat, where the relatives welcomed us with open arms and our parents could breathe as if they were whole.

But the years passed and we sisters followed different paths. The oldest was filled with anger, wanted to be "Swedish", wanted to deny her Chilean side, that name and those eyes who with each passing day seemed to shout that she never belonged. She wanted to be "normal", wanted to avoid all questions, she wanted to be completely Swedish, deny the brown in her eyes, those eyes that always screamed "You don't belong."

She hated the last name, which burned her tongue, wanted to change away what revealed everything she wanted to hide, her dark eyes, the inheritance she never asked for, everything that held her to a world she did not choose.

I groped for answers, for a place where I belonged. Searched the memories the parents gathered in their worn hands, in the stories about Chile, about everything they had left and I wanted to know more, wanted to understand why we were here.

I, the youngest, watched in confusion – until my own shame took shape. When the teenage years came I also started to feel the weight.. a burning shame of being the child of immigrants. Shame that we always stood out, that we could never hide our origins.

Because no matter how much our parents said we were Swedish, no matter how much they insisted that we adapt, their words were just empty, because they didn't know what Sweden was. They didn't know how to be Swedish, they had never been. They tried to raise us to fit in, but how can parents with Chilean culture, Chilean memories and dreams create Swedish children, in a country they hardly knew?

They wanted so badly, but nothing they did was enough. Inside the house lives their Chile; the music, the language, the food, the smells. But outside the windows – Sweden's cold wind, where we have to learn to become someone else. We stood between two worlds – not Swedish, but not Chilean either, because when we came to Chile, they saw us as strangers there too.

We had only summer glimpses of the land they called home. We spoke the language, but lacked all that makes it one's own. And so we stood there, alone in our double homelessness, in a land where our faces stuck out like a memory of something else, in a culture we didn't own but wore and another we never fully understood.

All we wanted was to belong but home was always somewhere else. So we carry their longings, their struggles and our own wounds, two sisters on different paths but with the same loss, the same shame, when we wander between two worlds that never meet, and none of them is ever entirely our own.

[izabesworld]

love ur posts, they are very educational because not many of us are able to find anything good about Romani and Romany in the bad that is posted. im just wondering, do u get hate from romani or romany for posting this?

I’ve received 4 different asks asking this, and I wasn’t going to reply because I understand why I’ve got the reaction that has been handed to me. However, to answer your question, yes.

I’ve received backlash from what I’d say is four different angles. 1) A few people just don’t like Roma, and they don’t like that I’m trying to share more of us with you. Which is fair enough, sometimes people just don’t like others. However, I feel that these responses honestly just fuel me on.

What could a group of over 1 million people have done to you that is so horrific that you dislike each and everyone of us? I’ve received a message telling me of someone’s person experience, saying someone Roma stole their doorbell? (Bit odd of someone to do). However, that was followed by, “so when growing up, as punishment, my mom would say, ‘I’ll sell you to the gypsies’.”

There will be bad Roma and good Roma, however, I do believe it’s important to understand the good Roma will always outweigh the bad, no matter the time in history. It’s like me saying, “France wouldn’t accept us into their country, so I hate the French,” or, “When I was two a Romanian gang set my Vardo on fire, so I hate all Romanians.”

I’m old and mature enough to understand that not all people are like this, and there are good Romanian and French people out there. I wouldn’t actively go out of my way to message a Romanian and say, “hey, I love your post about ***** in Romania, however, you set my vardo on fire, so I can’t accept you as a person.” Not only because that message in itself is self-centred, but also because it’s just plain ridiculous.

2) I’ve received backlash from people who identify as Ghost Romani, which are people who were taken away from their Romani family young, and were brought up in a new culture and are now trying to learn more about themselves.

When I tell people, “you’re not Romani if the only Romani connection you have is your second great grandad,” that isn’t me saying, “you’re not Romani if your parents are Romani but you grew up without the culture.” I understand why it may feel like a sensitive topic to you, because I couldn’t imagine a life where I hadn’t been brought up the way I had, and I understand why you may be upset about my comments, however I did not mean to invalidate you in any way.

If you’re someone who was taken away from their Romani family, you have EVERY right to try get back in touch with your relatives, people and culture.

3) Some people just don’t understand what I’m doing.

They feel manipulated and that I’m trying to twist a narrative of a group of people that has only ever been portrayed as bad. I guess, in that term, you’re exactly right. I am trying to manipulate the content you see, I am trying to make it more historically and periodically accurate. I am trying to twist the negative narrative of our people and turn it into something more positive.

Why would I sit and talk about the bad people in Roma when there is already so much talking about that?

I remember loving that Netflix series, “Inside the world’s toughest prisons”, however coming across an episode named, “Romania : Gypsy Prison”, and thinking here we go again. I wasn’t ignorant and I did watch it, I took it all in. Only to find there’s another source of “Roma representation” that happily uses the word gypsy, presents us as loud, unwelcoming, drug dealers, s3x offenders, murderers and contract killers.

Why isn’t there positive representation in the media? It is because we keep to ourselves? The media does this with every other minority race too, it’ll show how African Americans robbed a shop, how Indians ran a money laundering scheme in Poland. The difference is, though, with these groups, is that there are people online that we actively seek that will share their culture and themselves.

Do you see Korean’s showing off their amazing food, spread the kindness of their culture, only to say in the same video, “some of us murder though”. Do you see people in Zimbabwe sharing their detailed clothing and beyond scenic safari areas, only to go, “many people who own safari sites, do rip tourists off.” No, because they’re sharing and expressing the positives of their culture and way of life.

4) I’m putting us in danger. This response has solely been from the Roma on this app, who send me a message explaining how what I’m sharing hasn’t been shared for a reason and how I’m not putting hundreds of thousands of Roma in danger.

To that I would respond, “okay”.

I am putting us in danger, and that is something I thought hard about before I started posting. However, the further we let stereotypes control the world view on us, the further we hide and not show what good people we can be, how festive we can be, our trades and our hobbies, the further conflict we receive.

Yes, I may be sharing too much, but in this world, too much is not enough.

[0ruguitas]

Well clearly they want the family to go “hey yknow what fuck you grandma” and put her in the encanto’s nursing home or something. Genuinely though no idea what more people want from her, her entire house collapsed and almost killed the family - her number one worst fear realized - and she apologizes to everyone about it? Unreal fandom behavior

Yeah 100% agree.

I'm glad you mentioned nursing homes because it allows me to go on a bit of a tangent about why it is Americans seem to be the ones who have a problem with Encanto's ending.

I was actually talking to my mom the other day and she mentioned how bizarre and sad she finds the American cultural norm of not only just throwing your elderly relatives into a nursing home, but also the concept of kicking your kid out to fend for themselves the minute they turn 18. Like it just is not like that in Colombian culture (I don't wanna speak for other Latin American countries but it does seem like the general norm in most of their cultures as well that you don't just, stop supporting your family.)

There was a decent part of my life where my grandma lived in my home with us and while my grandma is living on her own in an apartment now, my dad takes care to visit her literally every day, and in today's pandemic climate, he brings her groceries and whatever else she might need when he can.

I am a full grown adult who has graduated college and has a job, and I still live with my parents due to my own financial struggles. In the US this is seen as embarrassing, but in Colombia this is the norm. My parents are expected to take care of me for as long as I need it and it is expected of me to pull my weight and to some day return the favor. Our relationship isn't always perfect but I will always sooner try to mend it then to up and leave.

It's no surprise most of the people who complain about Encanto's ending and over all message are white Americans. Because while yeah projection has a lot to do with it, it's also this American hyper individualism once again at play where they just cannot fathom another cultural view on family and what's expected of you in your roll as a part of a family.

Encanto is wish fulfilment for Latino kids who grew up in messy families. These same kids who despite the hardship, feel a duty and responsibility to their family. Most of us do see ourselves in the shoes of a Madrigal, suffering in silence for the sake of the family. The major difference here is that not all of us have the luxury of having an Abuela Alma who understands where she went wrong and actively strives to better herself. That's why it's important and that's why most white Americans simply will never understand.

[pascalina]

The brothers' movie

11/07/2015

They don't use the same last name, but they are siblings. Pedro Pascal (40) the Chilean actor who starred in Game of Thrones and now has a starring role in the Netflix series Narcos, uses his mother's surname because it is easier to pronounce in English. 17 years younger, Lucas Balmaceda Pascal (23), also an actor, debuted in Los 80 and today stars in the TVN series Juana Brava. Here, both talk for the first time about their relationship, their love for cinema and their mutual admiration.

José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal was born in Chile, but a few months later he had to go into exile with his parents and his older sister, Javiera, to Denmark. It was the end of 1975. Thanks to the Rockefeller scholarship granted for his father, the doctor José Balmaceda Riera, a year later they moved to the United States: first they lived in San Antonio, Texas. Life there was just beginning and it was not easy.

Seventeen years later, in 1992, Lucas Balmaceda was born in Orange County, California, into the comfort of a family that was financially in its prime. His dad was at the peak of his career: as a fertility specialist and director of one of the University of California's reproductive health centers. But suddenly they moved back to Chile when Lucas was three years old and his brother Nicolas was eight. The two older ones stayed there. Pedro was already studying drama at Orange County High School of the Arts. Then he went to New York to study theater at the Tisch School of the Arts at New York University.

After a couple of small appearances in TV series, in 2014 he took the big leap in his career: he played Prince Oberyn in Game of Thrones, which made him world famous. Today, he has a starring role in the series Narcos. He is also filming a movie with Matt Damon and Willem Dafoe.

Fame came early for Lucas. After leaving Saint George High School in 2010, he studied theater at the Universidad Católica, and he began to shine: in year fourth, he starred in the theater play "La noche obstinada", by choreographer Pablo Rotemberg, and got a role in the successful television series Los 80 and today, in his last year, he is the co-star of Juana Brava, the new TVN nighttime series.

Scene one:

Lucas appears in Pedro's life

P: "I was 17 when Lucas was born. He was a baby when I left to go to university. I remember my first visit back and Lucas, who was not even two years old, was already the owner of the house. I remember those looks, wanting to tell me: 'I don't know who you are, but this is my house, mate.

To this day I have never seen that personality in another child. It was fascinating to see that wit in someone so small. Since he was a kid he had that fierce intelligence... The four siblings, Javiera, the eldest and the queen of the family; Nicolas, the doctor; Lucas and I are like a compact and consistent unit. I can't imagine life without them".

L: "Pedro was studying at the university in New York when I was born. When he went home for vacations to see the family, as I didn't know him, I thought: 'who is this guest, who is this weirdo who kisses my mother? She's mine!'. Back in Chile, every year Pedro came to visit us. It was the most entertaining thing in the world for me. He was much older and he would come with all the coolness, with all the culture of cinema, with horror movies that were not available here. Then we would watch them and play them out, we would do sketches. We would play that Pedro was a murderous monster and we would escape from him. We were each a character. He was very funny, he did voices, he impersonated people. He gets mad when I tell him, but I've always found that he has a Jim Carrey thing about him, he manages to make some impressive faces. When he came on, I couldn't stop watching him, he was too entertaining. We are all big movie buffs thanks to my dad. When I was three years old, he took my brothers and me to see Batman. I remember crying hysterically. I was very young, sensitive, and being in the cinema was like entering to another reality: loud noises, giant screen. I didn't understand anything.

Scene two

Transplanted

P: "What's Chilean about me and what's gringo about me is a very interesting question, because I don't think even at 40 years old I've been able to figure it out. I was raised and educated in the United States and socialized a lot with American pop culture, but Chilean pride has always been unwavering. My parents were exiled for eight years. So our visits to Chile were regular. My whole life I have lived in the United States and my whole life I have visited my relatives in Chile. However, since my siblings were raised in Chile, my connection to the country is much stronger today and it is something I am grateful for. Something that happens to me a lot is that when I say I've been in the U.S. my whole life, they say, "Well, you're a gringo then! And after a conversation in my fluent Spanish with a clear Chilean accent that same person turns around and says: I've been listening to you, you're Chilean!

L: "I am Chilean because I lived and grew up here since I was three years old, but at the same time I have a cultural disconnection: my parents lived 25 years in the United States, my brothers are gringos. My visual culture is super gringo, the TV shows I watched when I was a kid or the movies I watch to this day I understand them from that place: as an American. More than being born in the United States, I feel it's because of my family's background".

SCENE THREE:

The performance

P: "There were good years and bad years (when I started my acting career in the United States). Many years I was a waiter to supplement my income. But from a very young age I was auditioning for professional jobs. In my late twenties my career in the theater was relatively consistent. Then, when opportunities in television arose, I was consolidating and it became much easier to pay my expenses. I think that struggle, going through those situations, empowers you a lot and it's one of the things I'm enormously grateful for. And Game of Thrones was an incredible gift. It's the best role I've ever played and they're the best people I've ever worked with."

L: "It's Pedro's fault that I wanted to be an actor. But when I told him I wanted to study theater it was hard for him, more than anything, because he cares about me and studying theater is hard. You have to be very wise and have a super high self-esteem to take care of yourself. Pedro went through many things. If there is an actor who doesn't have contacts in the United States, it's him. Everything he has achieved is because of his work. That's why when people ask me why I don't go to the U.S., it's a resounding no. Being Pedro Pascal's little brother is not going to get me around the corner; I would have to be Tom Cruise's twin to achieve anything. Even so, Pedro had many failed career starts. In 2011, for example, he was offered a starring role in a series called Wonder Woman and it was eventually canceled. That's why, when Games of Thrones came up, I was like, wow! We were all freaking out, because Games of Thrones is like a worldwide trending topic. All the episodes he was in, we were all watching them together at my house, eating pizza or sushi."

SCENE FOUR:

Mutual lessons

P: "I try not to get too involved in anything Lucas does or how he does it. He has single-handedly created each of his experiences and is one of the most inspiring things I've ever seen. He loves his work and is continually developing his skills for television and theater, and eventually film. He executes like a real artist and, to be honest, it is more common for me to learn something from him than for him to learn something from me. I mean that very sincerely. Lucas reminds me to work hard and keeps me inspired. When I saw him in Los 80 I was incredibly proud, but not surprised. I was seeing something I had always known. The only advice I've given him is to not be such a workaholic, to take care of himself and to be proud of what he's accomplished and what he still has yet to accomplish. Deep down, I'm always going to be the protective big brother."

L: "Pedro is an object of admiration for me. What he says is law for me. Sometimes I ask him: 'Pedro, did you see that movie?' and he says: 'Yes, I didn't like it'. I tell him: 'Oh, I didn't like it either'. The nice thing about our relationship is that it happens so sporadically, once or twice a year, that the moments when we see each other are very intense. We either fight a lot or we love each other too much, but it's always like a story, like a movie. While he's there and I'm here, we talk a lot on WhatsApp and Facebook".

P: "With Lucas we always keep each other up to date on what movies to watch, what TV shows are good. I bug him all the time asking him about what's going on in his life and I'm always asking him about his perspective on things. Despite being away from each other for a long time, Lucas and I are very close and always have been. I see Lucas at the beginning of an amazing career, with an unwavering curiosity and passion. I love it when he confides in me about things he is enjoying or situations he is dealing with."

L: "I've never seen Pedro in theater, but I've been told he's tremendous. On camera, I find that he has a very intense look. He also has, and in that we are very similar, a very strong visual culture, the fact that we have always liked horror movies. He plays characters that hide something, dark characters. A great strength is that he is very sensual, he knows how to handle himself well from seduction".

P: "Lucas is brave, he's fearless. There's nothing he's not willing to try, he's never going to give up on a challenge, he's never going to leave something halfway, no matter what that means to him. Lucas is unstoppable.

Link interview