#um yeah that's all the tags i can think of ok bye

[shecriestotheclickingoftime]

i'm here - 1.8k words

bf!patrick zweig x shy!socialite!reader

two fics in two days?? who even is this??

this is gossiping, girly, sweet soft boyfriend patrick zweig fic 😭😭😭😭

ok so basically in this one you're a socialite girl, socially anxious and shy, and you always have to go to your parents' events and have endless small talk to impress their friends. and you hate it. but this time, you have your sweet boyfriend patrick there, with his "zweig charm", to handle it for you.

fluff, soft!patrick zweig (as always w me), and just basically yeah. i imagined it as college era patrick zweig, and classes/academics get mentioned once, but in general it's not set in a super specific time period.

partially inspired by a conversation i had with @grimsonandclover and a bot that she made, so creds to the loml annie for that!! and for inspiring me to write patrick “one of the girls” zweig because he is very much present in this fic. and also a million thanks to @newrochellechallenger2019 for discussing the idea with me earlier <333

and i wrote this with fem!reader in mind, and like you wearing a dress and heels is mentioned, and patrick is taller than you, but if you ignore that this could generally be read as gender neutral? but do be aware of that!

ok that's it! i hope u enjoy!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

you'd always hated going to your parents' events. you were already shy and more on the introverted side, so having to spend the whole night in a crowded place full of your parents' coworkers and friends, and being expected to greet all of them and "make the rounds" felt like pure torture. the music was always bad, the guests were always obnoxious, and your social anxiety always went through the roof.

luckily for you, your boyfriend was the complete opposite. patrick zweig thrived in social settings, always having his loud, cocky persona on, and it seemed like he never ran out of things to say. so, when one of your parents' dreaded events was coming up, it was a no-brainer fro you to invite him as your plus-one. 

he always seemed to understand you, and your nonverbal cues, in a way that not even you could fully understand. he could always tell when you were anxious. 

so, there you were, in your bedroom, slipping on your red-bottomed heels in your silky black dress, patrick sitting on your bed waiting for you to get ready.

"i really, really don't want to go," you sigh, slipping on your shoes and sitting next to patrick on the bed. you lean your head on his shoulder as he puts his arm around you, rubbing circles on your back reassuringly. 

"you look nice. and it'll be fine, i'm here with you this time," he says gently, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head. "if you get overwhelmed, i can take over. i'll do all the talking."

you smile softly at his reassurances, resting against him for a moment before your parents call you down, saying that its time to leave. 

you get up, as patrick slips on his suit jacket, and intertwines his hand with yours as you walk down the stairs, and out of the house into the car that's taking you to the event. you sit in the third row with patrick, your parents in the row in front of you, as the driver begins to pull away to take you all to the gala.

the silence of the car is only interrupted by the sound of the heater blowing and your parent's quite, idle chatter. you leg bounces as you anxiously anticipate the event, going over names in your head and trying to craft the introduction and greeting you'll give everyone, like you're trying to memorize lines in a script. you look out the window, spacing out, when you feel patrick scooting from his seat on the opposite side of the row to the middle seat. he intertwines his hand with yours, lifting them to press a kiss to the back of your hand, whispering affirmations like "it's ok" and "i'm here" to you under his breath. 

you look over at him with a nervous smile, him meeting you with a wide grin. "i like that i get to take you to one of these," he whispers, quiet enough that no one else in the car could hear it, as his thumb rubs circles in your hand. "we can be judgey together, you know? i know how much you like to gossip about the outfits. i'll make it actually fun to be there, you know," he murmurued, his grin turning smug as he watched your anxiety break a little as you let out a quiet laugh. 

"yeah, yeah, sure," you whisper back, rolling your eyes withy a smile as you lean your head onto his shoulder. "i'm glad you're coming with me to this," you say sincerely, as he presses a kiss to the crown of your head in response.

"of course i'm here. that's my job as a boyfriend isn't it?" he laughs, letting you relax against him, sitting comfortably in the silence of the car ride as you near the venue. "you look beautiful tonight, you know."

he feels you smile as you hide your face in his shoulder. even though you guys have bee dating for a while, you still get shy at patrick's compliments, and he loves it. 

you nuzzle into his shoulder, trying to find some peace in the quiet, as the car pstarts to park in front of the venue. the event is some sort of charity gala and auction, being held in the ballroom of some sort of museum. as you climb out of the car, patrick holding your hand as you climb out, you feel the cold winter air nipping at your skin. but patrick is quick, snaking his arm around your waist and pulling you in as you walk up to the door and go in. 

the music is boring and loud, and the lights are dim and blue. the chatter is dull and business-oriented around you, and you see your parents walking up to a group of "friends" with fake smiles pressed on their faces as you take patrick's hand, letting him guide you near a corner of the room.

"i hate it here already" you whisper to him, as he looks down at you with a sweet grin. "i know you do, baby," he says, placing his arms around your waist again, resting it there as you stand near the wall and look into the room. 

"god, that suit is ugly," patrick whispers to you, a cocky grin on his face as he motions toward a man is a vibrant purple velvet suit, brown shoes and a matching purple velvet tie. "who dressed him? who let him leave the house like that? they should be ashamed of themselves," patrick says, his voice getting a bit louder as he looks down at you, trying to read your face.

his smile grows wider when he sees you break into a soft smile, giggling under your breath. he himself didn't know too much about fashion, or care too much in general, but he knew the light gossip put you at ease, so he tried to learn from your preferences, memorizing the little fasion rules that you'd set. and, to be fair, even he could tell that the man's suit was fugly. 

you whisper back, "and that lady... she looks like she's pushing 70, wearing a sequin mini-dress to a black-tie charity event. what is she doing?" you say, your grin widening, as patrick squeezes your hip gently, both of you trying hard to stifle your laughter.

patrick bends down to press a kiss to your head, a force of habit of his, rubbing your back as you two look around the room, pointing out and nitpicking random outfits, or hairstyles, or lame song choices from the dj. 

“what's the point of even hiring a dj if he's this shitty?" you whisper up to patrick, your words engulfed in laughter as you try to get them out, "i could play better music for free, just give me an aux cord and a spotify playlist" you giggle, as patrick nods his head, laughing a little too loud for a formal event like this. 

"shhhh... people might look" you say, playfully scolding patrick as he looks down at you fondly. 

of course, the moment had to be interrupted by your parents waving you over to their little group of work friends, as you sigh, pressing a fake smile to your face and nodding as the group looks over at you. "fuck, not this again" you whisper through your teeth at patrick, trying your best to keep your smile from falling into a frustrated grimace. it wasn't that you disliked your parents, or their friends for that matter, but it always felt like the same routine every time. you getting singled out, asked about school, grilled about random future job prospects, as you slowly felt your insides cruble further into an anxiety-fueled despair as you repeat the same lines, over and over, to every other little group that your parents want to "show you off" to. 

but patrick just grabs your hand, squeezing it gently, pressing an easygoing samile onto his face, and nodding at you reassuringly. you're not sure what he means by that, but you know he's going to try and take caare of you like he always does. patrick zweig, always the charmer.

you greet the group, introducing patrick as your boyfriend, seeing his smile turn a little smug as you claim him.

you squeeze his hand as the adults around you start to ask questions, and you answer, trying to turn it into some sort of conversation instead of just an itnerview. and patrick follows along perfectly, using his "zweig charm" (as he calls it) to cover for you, squeezing your hand every so often as he talks you up to your parents friends, raving about the newest classes you're taking, and the advanced concepts you explain to him. he makes sure to give you space to speak whenever you want, always jumping in whenever you get overwhelmed, always able to keep up his social, smug act flawless, even when you get shy.

you finally get to a point where you're able to break off the conversation, smiling and excusing yourself from the circle, letting out a breath as you step away from your performance.

"that wasn't so bad," you say to patrick, hands still intertwined as you pull him to the edge of the room again, taking a breather from the crowd of people conversating about business and whatever, turning around to face in again and just get some time to talk with him. "but i still want to go home," you complain, a joking smile on your face, as the two of you stand at the edge of the room. 

you feel him pull you into his arms, your back pressed against his chest as he snakes his arm around your waist, both of you looking into the room. he towers over you like this, resting his chin on the top of your head as he holds you tightly.

"you're doing great, baby" he affirms, his voice soft and sweet. "the cocktail and dinner time will end soon anyways, so we can be done with small talking with everyone soon. when the auction starts we can just sit down and gossip again," he says in a low voice, giving you a gentle squeeze as he holds you. 

and the night continued like that, patrick holding your hand through it all, jumping into conversations when you got overwhelmed, letting you cling to him around the room. and every time your parents called you over to talk to some other friends, the process felt a little easier, a little lighter, because you had patrick there.

"always the charmer," you whispered at him, teasing, as you walked away from yet another conversation about your future and politics and whatnot, with some of your parents friends you couldn't even remember the names of anymore.

and when you sat at the table, as the speeches and charity auction started, you and patrick sat, whispering to each other quietly andf stifling laughter. 

and this night felt easier than any other event you'd had to go to before. because patrick was there for you, always. and as the night ended, and you walked out, you thought to yourself, "maybe these event's aren't always so torturous after all" 

:)))

[spacelesscowboy]

anyone else violently afraid of dying in a mass preventable accident or is it just me. asking for a friend.

[whyse7vn]

CLINGY -

[ kim seokjin min yoongi x reader ]

SEOKJIN -

jin: i’m going to bed now if you even care

resting my body after a long hard day at

work if that’s even important in your eyes

almost died today if you even give a shit

it’s 2 am and i’m JUST going to sleep without you (my girlfriend) messaging me (your boyfriend) goodnight if you even care a little bit

you have 5 missed calls from jin!

jin: be honest do you care?

y/n: no

jin: you didn’t say gn

y/n: it’s 2 am

jin: no u right you don’t even care that’s what’s up

y/n: what

jin: no lol i get it whatever

y/n: what do you want

jin: a goodnight would be nice

y/n: it’s 2 am

jin: yeah???

y/n: am

as in morning

jin: awww who died

here for u 💓

y/n: morning not mourning

jin: can you say gn pls so i can sleep

you have 1 miss call from jin!

y/n: CAN YOU FUCK OFF

jin: CAN YOU SAY GN

y/n: no joke ur 5 seconds away from being blocked

jin: just say you don’t care about me at this point 😭

y/n: i do not care about you at this point

jin: um

y/n: at all

jin: ok well that bit wasn’t necessary

i think i got ur point

y/n: i’m glad

jin: i guess i’ll just go to sleep then

without a goodnight from my lovely girlfriend

sighs

you have 10 miss calls from jin!

y/n: jin

jin: yeah

you can no longer send messages to this contact!

jin: 😧

YOONGI -

yoongi: miss you

delivered 5 minutes ago

yoongi: wow that’s crazy i’ll just jump off a cliff then

y/n: that was kinda dramatic

yoongi: sorry do i know you?

y/n: get a grip

yoongi: reply faster

do you even love me anymore?

y/n: well

yoongi: that’s not funny

y/n: do you see me laughing?

yoongi: take it back

y/n: i take it back

love when ur clingy >.<

yoongi: i’m not clingy

y/n: you just threatened to kill urself cuz i didn’t reply to you instantly

yoongi: that’s basic respect

i message you

you reply within the next second

y/n: that’s unrealistic

yoongi: no it’s not

you do it most of the time

lately you’ve been slacking tho

y/n: excuse me????????

yoongi: ur excused

y/n: and if i slap you?

yoongi: i’ll enjoy it

y/n: YOONGI OMG?/):).£

LMAOOOO

are you dying????

what is wrong with you

ur acting like you love me or something

yoongi: don’t say things like that

makes it seem like i’m a bad boyfriend

y/n: looks left looks right

yoongi: i’m a good boyfriend

y/n: looks at audience looks back at you

yoongi: stop

i am a good boyfriend

y/n: yeah!

yoongi: and if i slap YOU?

y/n: GASP

good boyfriends don’t threaten domestic violence

yoongi: neither do good girlfriends

y/n: are you saying i’m a bad girlfriend?

yoongi: looks left looks right

y/n: how low of you min yoongi…

i am NOT a bad girlfriend

yoongi: ur not a good one either

so where does that leave us

y/n: i’m the best?

yoongi: lol!

y/n: is this ur fucked up way of calling me a good girl

yoongi: ok where tf did you get that from?

ur really bad at reading the room

y/n: i’m in no room

yoongi: it’s a saying 🙄

y/n: ignoring you just rolled ur eyes at me rn

i’m SAYING we should kiss

yoongi: wow so clingy

y/n: what can i say!!!

yoongi: can you acknowledge what i open our conversation with pls

y/n: no

yoongi: ok kys bye

y/n: ur clingy

yoongi: k

now come home

—

idk the jin one was the first draft for the jin part in delivered i think and idk where the yoongi one came from just found her has said hey this is ok ig… thought they kinda gave the same vibe so posted them together better than nothing right? SIGHS sorry idk WHO WANNA BUY ME A NEW PHONE WHO⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️

i’m spiralling and have no storage pls forgive me

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @earth2ela @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @seokmyballs @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @meowgiz @jmnscutie @threeopossumsinacoat @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin @iammeandmeisiam @socksfirstalways @knjlvr06 @lailaisarmy @thvkives @xstfudaisyx @xxxanimangxxx @solstice34 @ml8dy @hoeforseoks @futuristicenemychaos @featjunranghae @jksgirlfrl @yeetedandoboi

[worldlxvlys]

yes i’m so sorry i should’ve been more specific but i need what happens when they go inside lol😭 (dwb!chris pt 16)

every word

dwb! chris x reader

warnings: cursing, mentions of sex, suggestive but no actual smut

a/n: first off you’re all good, no need to apologize i was just confused lmao

also, idk if you wanted smut or not but this one felt like it needed to be more on the fluffier side. if you want another part with smut, i can do that just lmk

hope you like :)

here’s part one (dwb! chris pt 16), if you haven’t make sure to read it first !!

————-

we both went inside, closing the door behind us.

“hmmm, you know the most effective way to warm up? “ chris said, a smirk growing on his face.

“how?” i squinted my eyes at him.

“a hot shower” he said as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

“hmm sounds good. so me first, or you?” i asked, feigning innocence.

he gave me a deadpanned look. “you’re not serious”

“are you trying to ask me something, chris?” i asked wanting to hear him say it.

“can we shower together?” he asked.

“hmmm, i suppose” i said, pretending to think about it first.

“ok but first, i gotta do something” he said pulling out his phone.

my eyebrows furrowed as i watched him.

“ok?”

i watched as the dial tone rang while he put the phone on speaker.

“hello?” a woman’s voice picked up.

“hey, it’s chris”

“hey! yeah i know i saved your num-“ before she could even finish he cut her off.

“yeah, cool, listen i just wanted to make one thing clear. you’re my supplier and that’s it”

his supplier. the supplier.

“so if you thought this was anything more you’re wrong. i have a girlfriend, and she is the only girl in the world for me. so the flirting and touching needs to stop”

there was a pause.

“oh! but chris-“

but? nah fuck this bitch.

i cut her off “but nothing, he told you he’s taken. is there a problem? do i need to send you a sex tape or something for you to get the memo?

chris’s eyes widen, his mouth open and closing like a fish’s.

“um, no no. sorry”

“yeah you will be if you ever fucking touch him again”

“uh, ok. sorry “

“stop apologizing. you didn’t know, but now you do”

“ok…well, bye”

with that i hung up. chris just stared at me with wide eyes.

we both looked at each other before bursting out laughing.

“your supplier’s a pussy” i said gasping for air.

“she’s normally not like that, but i don’t blame her. you sounded like you were genuinely gonna fuck her up”

we both continued to laugh.

“thank you for calling her, i didn’t think you were actually going to” i said as he drew circles onto my hips with his thumbs.

“of course, baby. i didn’t just say that stuff to gain your forgiveness. i meant every word” he said, staring deep into my eyes.

“every. word.” he said before leaning in, pressing his lips to mine in a soft kiss.

when we broke away he spoke, “hey, do you wanna do a bath instead of a shower?”

“um yeah, sure. how come ?” i asked.

“baths are more romantic” he smiled as he cupped my jaw.

“plus shower sex can be dangerous” he added.

i rose my eyebrows, “um, who said anything about sex ?”

“well how else would we make a tape to send her ?” he asked.

my eyes widen, “you’re fucking crazy” i said, my face breaking out into a grin.

“it was your idea, ma”

———————

hope you liked it <333

dwb! masterlist

main masterlist

tag list: @lovingsturniolo @lustfulslxt @gwenlore @flowerxbunnie @sturnssx @mattslolita @its-jennarose @frankeelovesthesturnio @sophssturn @bernardsleftbootycheek @queen161718 @chrisdevora @cupidsword @nickmillersn1gf @stramboli4life @mattsneezing @chrisstankyleg @sturniolobltch @vib3swithanuk @ciarasturn1 @bethsturn @bernardenjoyer @mbbsgf @soursturniolo @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @ssturniolo

[atticollateral]

Autism Assessment Update (bc it's been almost 3 months since I mentioned it haha oops) (it's a novel. you've been warned.)

tagging @examishbookwyrm bc they did comment on my autism assessment post I made in MARCH!! n i didn't respond...(adhd moment) get honourable mention'd.

--- SOOOO. BIG ASS PERSONAL LIFE UPDATE!!! I have... literally the worst news? Like the worst-worst news I think I will ever share. So imma start from the beginning :> [I detail everything about the assessment in this post. The process, the assessment itself, and the after.]

So. This is part of the NS Pilot Program for assessing people who were going to age out of the early-childhood-assessment waitlist (because hey! it is a 5 year long wait! haha!) which was led by NS Health and the Gov. of Canada (who paid for all the assessments.) It's safe to say that NOBODY is happy! (if you look it up you will find articles on how... awful it's been. Also if you look up articles I might have left out details bc my brain is VERY SPOTTY bc i am enraged) but anyway,

The first part of this is they had been calling my mom during the day; my mother had been working days. So she wasn't picking up. And they weren't answering her calls back or her messages! Already a big red flag. Because they can't get ahold of her they call me. Me! The person they're going to assess, who, at the time, was 18, and perfectly capable of consenting, as an adult, and taking care of their own medical records and appointments and such. They go "Hello, is this (deadname's) mom?" And I go "This is (deadname); and my name is [Chosen]" and they go "Oh, Well. Can you get your mother to call us?" And I said in a tone I believe was very clearly annoyed bc wtf? "Oh, no, you can tell me whatever you're going to tell her!" They tell me "Well we're looking to get you into the NS pilot program for autism assessments" yada yada "is that something you'd be interested in?" And me being me (poor and reasons to think I'm autistic and being on the waitlist) go "yeah!" AND THIS FUCKING WOMAN GOES "ok then get your mom to call us. this is the date. we need her to confirm." and I go "...why?" and they go "we just need to talk to her." and I go "...why can't you just talk to me?" and she just repeats herself so I go "um. ok. well. you have a good day? bye?" and hang up. So i'm simmering; bc I am literally an adult. I don't need my mom. I should be treated like an adult and I'm getting infantilized. I got the woman's name and # so I give it to my mom. It takes another month to get a date for the assessment approved bc they STILL WONT ANSWER HER CALLS OR MESSAGES.

My mother was required to do two prerequisite assessments a week or two before my in-person one. One over the phone and one over zoom. I am above the age of 16 (as stated) and perfectly capable of consent and being an informant. (you are legally allowed to consent to a majority of medical assessments in NS when you turn 16 w/o alerting ur parents, and clearly allowed to do that over the age of 18 as that is age of majority.) So i'm just miffed. They tell her not to tell me anything. She says fuck that (thank the gods) and so she tells me things they tell her. So the night before the assessment I help her with the form they MAKE HER FILL OUT before the assessment like "when did your child start walking/running" "when did they learn to ride a bike" "when did they start talking/writing" stuff like that. and I go ok. sure. autism can show in early childhood, it's a neurological developmental disorder. I get it. Even though autistic individuals can have average, slowed, or accelerated development (IT'S ALMOST LIKE ITS LITERALLY CALLED AUTISM SPECTRUM DISORDER) There's a question that catches me off guard. "what is your child's dominant hand" ...i'm sorry. back it up. *Yes.* There are studies that say many people who have ASD are left handed or ambidextrous. But oh. My. Gods. Above. THAT IS NOT GROUNDS FOR DIAGNOSIS; and you can also ASK THE KID during the assessment! What kind of question?! [I am right-hand predominant but I am ambidextrous.]

I move on.

I go into the assessment. On the table; the dr's introductory sheet in a photo frame. His title sits atop the document with a head, MADE OF BLUE PUZZLE PIECES alarm bells alarm bells alarm bells oh my fucking god help me jesus christ please help me i promise i'll believe in you if you help me right now please please plea "Hi!" A woman greets us, sitting in an office with the door open. I don't know her name. She doesn't stand from her desk. "I'll be with you in a moment." I laugh awkwardly. My mom says ok as the woman shuts her door. I tell my mom "I hate it here; can we go home?" Because I genuinely feel unsafe; I'm shaking. She laughs softly and goes "It'll be okay." So I put a brave face on bc I love my mom and she's nice and wait for the lady. She calls us in a few minutes later. I don't remember her introducing herself. I don't remember her offering a handshake or any other "polite" gesture. That would be something important to do, and I would have remembered it. She tells us how long it will be and a lay down of what's gonna happen and asks MY MOTHER FOR CONSENT TO FILM ME. Not ME for consent to film ME, an 18 year old. My mom turns to me confused and asks me if I'm okay with it instead. I go "yeah." (I was not okay with it); the woman told us the assessment would not happen if they could not film it. So I agreed; giving *assent* rather than *consent* was something I was pissed off about then and there. The woman asks HER if she'd like to stay so my mom asks ME if she wants me to stay, I hug my mom after I ask her to leave because I'm an adult and can handle myself. I don't need my mom to be there. I sit down. I have my pompompurin stuffed animal with me and a messenger bag with pens and stuff in it because I know there are things to write and don't like using other people's things. She doesn't ask about the bag. She sets up the camera and such, explaining that she'll have to occasionally turn to her laptop to make sure the recording is still going. I have pompom in my lap along with a fidget while she talks. She says something along the lines of "um, you'll want to put that away, you'll need your hands." And I go, rather firmly, something along the lines of; "I'll put it away when I need to use my hands. I am focusing on you right now." To which she seems surprised and goes "um... okay, that's fine." And continues on. (Was she not expecting an adult to have clear boundaries and be able to state their needs?) She offhandedly mentions something about [Dr] perhaps coming in to see me at some point during the assessment. My heart drops. She's not the doctor? She isn't the psychiatrist? What the hell?

The assessment begins. They're giving me tests for children, she said she made it harder. I disagree. I find the tasks easy. Simple games/puzzles. I tell her I like puzzles. She keeps throwing positive affirmation at me; I become annoyed with it after awhile because I know she's only doing it to make me continue doing the activity. It's common for people who work with children. She is infantilizing me. I know I was thinking it subconsciously.

The tests are not geared towards my age range, I notice immediately. I become miffed, going "these are too easy for me so far" or something to that effect. She laughs at me. I become upset. We start the reading part of the test. I read to show reading speed and comprehension. I read out loud to show my pronunciation. I read words that don't exist to show my reasoning skills when it comes to language. I am in my 5th year of high school (I struggle with school). This task is mundane and annoying. I feel like I am in third grade. I feel infantilized. I feel like the tests aren't going to be accurate. I am annoyed. I do it fast as I can to get it over with. Some of the reading pieces she makes me do multiple times.

We begin the mathematics part. I am not good at mathematics. She has upped the difficulty for the mathematics, she tells me. I begin; The first test is a Working Memory test; listing numbers she reads to me in a specific order. I am bad at it after the more convoluted ones. Some of the work is recognizing shapes and patterns. There is addition, fractions, multiplication and division questions. She points out I'm 'doing the test wrong' multiple times. I tell her that this test is stupid (or something to that effect) due to the structure. She laughs at me. There are a few tests I can't do or become quickly annoyed with (naming mean, median, and mode, prime numbers, fractions.) As I haven't done them since 11th grade level (I took a different math course and haven't done math since I finished my credits 2 school years ago.) We break for lunch after doing half of the mathematics.

I return to continue with the mathematics. I am still annoyed even after eating lunch. I had complained to my mother how it felt like torture: No eraser, No Calculator, no Tools, and no asking for help (She is not allowed to give me help, even if I don't know something.) I am on the brink of actual tears in frustration because I cannot receive help. I understand the potential why, but I think it's idiotic.

We begin the writing and listening comprehension. I am made to write an essay on a game I like and why I like it, I am given 10 minutes. I write it about Minecraft and it's offshoots. For listening comprehension, there are a few tests. I tell her about certain parts of what i've heard. Most of them are ads, so telling her what they say is easy for me, because it feels like slush and I have trained my ears to pick up more important information because of APD (Auditory Processing Disorder). She repeats them a few times to get me to tell her more. There are more working memory tests. Something with shapes, form, and colours. One about things she's listed. There's a test where I tell her a story in a picture book based on photos only. I am becoming tired. There's a test where I need to copy a picture. I am not allowed to trace the picture. I am not allowed to hold the picture. I am not allowed to use a tool. She says something about how I should like it because I told her I am an artist. I start going on while begrudgingly doing the test that this is horrible, this isn't what art is, and i'd like to not be doing it this way because it is impractical. She laughs at me again. I am annoyed. I get to take another short break after that.

There is another test when I come back with shapes. I see there are 8 pieces and a grid I must put them in; observing the grid, I go "I need all 8 pieces." She gives me 4 pieces. I frown. I say "I need all 8 of them, can I have them please?" as I put the 4 she gave me into the grid. She hands me 2. I put them in. I repeat myself. "I know I need all 8 of them. Can you give them to me please?" She gives me 1. I become insanely frustrated at that point. "What is this?" I go, "Can I have the last piece?" I ask her annoyedly, and she gives it to me. She's smiling. She thinks this is funny? I put it in the place. I rearrange the pieces into a nicer pattern in the grid because she annoyingly gave me the pieces while she takes her notes.

There is an activity where I have to tell her a story using 5 random pieces of garbage. She shows me how to do it first when I already understand the premise and was going to do it after the verbal instruction and presentation of the items. I know it is to assess my imaginative play. I am an 18 year old artist. This is easier than breathing to me. I do it begrudgingly because I am embarrassed to do it. She laughs at me again. I am so annoyed at this point I am thinking the most angry thoughts. What is her issue??? I don't say anything while I wait for the other tests.

I am presented with a test with over 100 questions. I say out loud multiple times "I don't have OCD" to multiple questions I've been asked before to assess me for OCD. She says something about 'Don't think about it. just answer.' and I say something along the lines of "I've been to therapy since I was about 12. I do therapy speak. I know what the questions are asking me. I can't not think about it." She scoffs at me. I am so irritated. Many of the questions ask me if I am suicidal. Many of the questions ask me if I am paranoid. There are questions about ego, and questions about self-worth, questions about poverty, questions about things that don't pertain (to see if I'm paying attention.) I finish the test. She asks if I answered honestly. I say "I think so." But I my answers will be different tomorrow. They're always different later. That's how surveys work.

One of the last tests is asking me questions and having me answer. Things like "do you have friends?" "how do you feel about relationships?"; I ask her "Well, how do you define relationships? Are you in any? Are you asking me about friendship or dating?" She tells me she has a partner; a husband if I recall. I say something about marriage and romance. She asks me more questions about feelings, boundaries, relationships, and experiences in my life. It is the last test.

We leave the room to talk to my mother in the waiting room. I have not seen [Dr] once. Girl asks me what my pronouns are. I tell her it/its. She complains. I tell her too bad flat out. We leave.

I only learn upon getting home that her name is Alison.

I wait a month for my draft results. I had to get my teacher to fill out a form. I had to sign a consent form for them to do that which they made me do digitally after the assessment and CLEARLY wanted my mother to sign. She gets me to sign it because I'm an adult. She understands.

My mom sits me down. She goes "You aren't going to like this." I frown. "I'm not autistic?" She nods. "You aren't. But they said you have 3 or 4 other things."

Alarm bells again. I get her to bring up my draft assessment on the computer for me to read. I am enraged. They refer to me as "transgendered". They misgendered me. There were numerous, insane typos that would be easy to catch on the first pass.

I begin work on an Essay/Paper telling them why their assessment is bullshit and how I meet the criteria for autism spectrum disorder. (I READ THE DSM-5 AND DSM-5-TR FOR THIS CRAP.) I also berate them the whole time for their behaviour, the nature of the assessment, and lack of care. A week or so later I get the final draft. They still misgendered me; and there are still typos. I get my mom to email it to me and I send it to multiple of my friends, my Therapist, and give her my consent to share it with my Psychiatrist and anyone else she sees fit with her discretion with the password for the protected document, along with a screenshot pointing out the most glaring typo (being misgendered.) My therapist and psychiatrist show it to the Autism Lead in their district with my consent.

I receive an overwhelmingly positive onslaught of "this assessment is bullshit! You SHOULD be angry." The autism lead tells my therapist I do likely have autism based on what was shown and told to her, and to get a second opinion (as she can't diagnose me without assessing me herself). I tell my therapist more about the assessment. She does some research.

The Psychometrist (someone who administers psychological tests/assessments) is underqualified during time of assessment.

Medical Negligence.

[Dr.] Is clearly on grounds to be tried for Medical Malpractice.

I am now working on submitting a complaint and finishing my paper.

I may potentially be involved in legal trouble against the psychologist I never even got to see or speak to.

Fuck that guy.

[dlishus05]

Ch. 6 Liquor and thoughts

Once we got into the car he turned on his music full blast and took off to the bar. It was a long drive but it was a good hiding place the boys picked out. Once we reaches the bar I ask “ can i have my keys back so i can get my stuff out of my truck?” Dean threw the keys at me and and said “hurry up and meet us inside”. I decide to stick around since they are more experienced hunters. ‘Maybe it won’t be so bad, i need people anyways might as well stick around.’

I went over to the truck and decided to change my shirt,put on a tank top, and touch up my makeup. I lock the truck and go in with the boys. I go inside and see them instantly, i holler at them and their eyes went wide once they saw me. You blush a bit from flattery and you walk over and sit in between them. “We’ll have a round of vodka shots please’’ you say. “You look good” Sam says “thanks, hush hey i was wondering since were cool now would it be okay if i went to my hotel room tonight?’’ I say “uhh…. I guess so” dean says. About that time the bartender brings the shots and you down yours and say bye to the boys.

“hold on we need to make plans for tomorrow and ask you a few questions.” Sam says. “Ugh okay ask away” you say. Sam gets out a little notepad and a pen “okay who all do you know hunterwise? What all do you know how to kill?” Sam asks “ oh ok, um so far I know you guys and Bobby Singer, he was the one who told me about this case. I’ve known him for a long time and he had helped me pick up hunting, He has looked after me since my parents Are dead, he is like a bonus dad.” You say. “Why would Bobby send us on the same case?” Sam asks dean. “I don’t know Sammy maybe it s to make here more social, hoe am i supposed to know?” Dean says. “ wait what?! Your kidding me, hey would Bobby do this to me?” You ask ‘does he not trust me?’ You think. “Ill be back i have a call to make!” You yell “damn she sounds pissed” Sam states. “Yeah no shit Sherlock” dean remarks.

Tag list: @natsusbitch

R/n: i am working on it, their slowly getting out there. Please ask if you want to be on tag list.

[papermint-airplane]

People you’d like to get to know better

I was tagged by @milky-cowplant, @ares-in-a-jar, @stargazer-sims, @weisskralle, and @happy-lemon. I feel the love! 🥰

last song: Blah Blah by Itzy. Their Japanese releases are always so 🔥

favorite color: Red and metallic gold. It's just a coincidence those are Iron Man colors. Total coincidence.

currently watching: At the moment, I am chipping away at a 17 hour Creepypasta iceberg video because it amuses me so much. I love Creepypastas sfm you have no idea. When they're good, they're amazing, but when they're bad, they're hilarious. Either way, it's literally all hits for me, no misses.

last movie: Hmm I don't watch movies much anymore so I think the last one was Across the Spider-verse. I need to carve out a good 12 hours at some point though because I've been dying for an LOTR rewatch. I need 12 uninterrupted hours and a day afterwards for recovery because I know I'm going to cry at the end of Return of the King like I always do and nobody else gets it but it's so bittersweet like I'm only fucking human what do you want from me. And furthermore--

currently reading: Due to my ever-dwindling attention span and stupid ass schedule, I read with my ears. I'm currently listening to Turn of the Screw read by Emma Thompson. The intro is read by Richard Armitage and his voice is like 🥵🥵. Can a voice be a zaddy? Because GOT DANG his voice is radiating zaddy energy. He kept moaning and shit and it was so unnecessary because this story is not like that and I'm like "yesss please keep talking forever". 🥵🥵🥵🥵

Sweet/spicy/savory: Savory most of the time, sweet sometimes, spicy almost never. I have intestines of glass. 😭

last thing I googled: The difference between inductive and deductive reasoning.

current obsession: Kinda dumb but I'm pretty obsessed with my new Rocketbook. It's a notebook that you can scan and digitize super easily and when you're done, you can use water to erase it and reuse it over and over. It's perfect for my random Sims notes because I can just send them immediately to my Dropbox and then erase it all so I don't have 1, 572, 349, 023 sticky notes all over my damn desk every time I wanna write down a hex code or something. Literally zero paper waste. It's awesome.

currently working on: Still puttering away on my Bachelor story even though I don't think most people really care about it. It still amuses me so I'mma keep posting it until it's done. I have non-Bachelor future plans for Aiden, though. 😈😈😈

Edit: Ya girl forgot to tag people. Still thinking about Richard Armitage, it is not my fault, I cannot be held responsible. I think literally everyone has done this by now but um....I can't think of a single person I follow who hasn't, actually. So...yeah. Ok anyway Ilu bye.

[hatsukeii]

Today, I’m thinking about… haikyuu + some other anime men that would absolutely eat UP chivalrous girls/non-binary peeps

warning(s): implied afab! reader (for fluency and flow’s sake) but since my afab but non-binary chivalry is what inspired me to write this anyways please feel free to interpret this as a non-binary reader if you want!!!

Something about seeing a girl wrap a protective arm around their friend’s waist in a crowd just gets them going. It’s how you guide your friends with a hand placed gently on their lower back or around their shoulder, the way that a boyfriend would, or how you offer to grab their bags on the way to class from lunch if they can’t make it back on time, it all makes him wonder whether he should become more like you as well- more like a man, than a boy.

It’s about him trying so hard to out-chivalry you, but always failing to be the one to hold the door open to a classroom, or to lend umbrellas, and pens, and notes, and tissues, to anyone who needs it. It’s about how all you need is a glance at someone’s face, to know to divert uncomfortable topics with ease, almost as naturally and quickly as breathing. It’s about you, somehow, treating your friends, and him, more like girlfriends than he has ever treated anyone.

One of those days, during a lovely, school formal dinner, he asks you why? Why be the man? Why not leave the chivalry to guys like him, and reap the benefits? And all you do is smile cheekily, and reply, “They need to know what being treated right looks like.” Your suit seems to glow a little when you respond, a glass in hand as you lean back on your chair, and he can’t help but wonder if you’ve ever been treated with the same kindness and chivalry that everyone else receives from you.

It’s the way that even at formal dinner, as he musters up the courage to ask for your hand to dance, you beat him to it, extending a gloved hand to his and tilting your head invitingly. It’s the way that he takes it, like a princess, and the two of you waltz on the dance floor, his hands on your waist and yours on his shoulders. It’s the way that he tells you he wants to be more like you, and that he wants to be the one to hold your back in a crowd, to grab your bag for you when you’re running late, to lend you umbrellas, and tissues, and pens, whenever you forget your own. It’s the way that he looks at you, like you’re the epitome of what it means to be a good man- a man that he will become so you too can know how it feels to be treated right.

Characters: Hinata Shoyou, Daichi Sawamura, Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Nishinoya Yuu, Asahi Azumane, Yamaguchi Tadashi, Kuroo Tetsuro, Lev Haiba, Matssukawa Issei, Iwaizumi Hajime, Bokuto Koutaro, Ushijima Wakatoshi, Terushima Yuuji, Shinsuke Kita, Itadori Yuji, Yuuta Okkotsu, Denji, Midoriya Izuku, Bakugou Katsuki, Kirishima Eijiro, Tenya Iida, Mirio Togata + all your faves<3

author’s note:

where are the masc girls/non-binaries today!!!! (me me me!!)

guys i acc love being my friends’ boyfriend sm like wdym you think you can treat them well um i’ve never made them cry or have to argue so who r you???? something about being chivalrous just resonates w me so much but i acknowledge that guys find me more like a dude than a girl or wtv so they’re always like yeah she’s cool i see her as one of the guys but like why am i acting more like a man than these guys ermmmm…

anyways this is a little nibble before i get to writing some real stuff tonight🙏🙏🙏 stay tuned…

tags!!

@starlysama @chuuya-brainrot @bailey-reeds @fiannee

ok love u guys bye bye

[5-htagonist]

progression of ageswap teru 

1: ill kill u bitch 2: i hate everyone, myself,touichirou, and also mob especially 3: i will NOT hate myself and the only person who exists is mob

[worksby-gabriella]

Boyfriend

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Reader

Summary: Kate wants to be Y/N's new boyfriend girlfriend.

Warning: none?

Very light fem!reader

Inspired By: Boyfriend by Dove Cameron

  “Babe! hurry up! We’re gonna be late again ‘cus of you!” Spencer calls from the lower level of his penthouse. his tone short and irritated. 

  “I’m going!” I yell back. 

  Me and Spencer have been dating for nine months. The first six were amazing, surprisingly. Spencer had made it known that he was not a relationship person but every time I stepped foot over his penthouse threshold every warning, anyone had ever given me about spencer was thrown out the door. I didn’t live with him, but I often spent the night over for days at a time and it always felt like he made sure to make this lavish penthouse feel like a sacred place for me. 

  These three months? I can’t help but describe it as bitter. I care about Spencer but that doesn’t mean loving him is easy these past few months. His words have gotten ugly with me, he’s short tempered, doesn’t take me seriously, he comes home late at night smelling like expensive perfume, when he knows I’ve been waiting for him. When his dad gets on him about taking his future seriously, he acts like a five-year-old and takes all his anger out on me. Right now, we’re heading to a networking gala for Eleanor Bishop, Spencer’s dad’s business partner. His dad thought it would only be right that I tag along since I work for Bishop Security and work for Eleanor as her assistant. 

  As I’m walking down the stairs Spencer looks me up and down and scoffs, “That’s what you’re wearing?” 

  “Yeah? Why?” I ask.

  “It’s a little... lowsy, don’t you think? I mean my friends, and people from work are gonna be there.”

  “Um, I can change if you want?”

  “No, it’s fine we don’t want you wasting anymore time.”

  We head downstairs to the lobby to meet the driver Spencer’s dad sent over and paid for. Shortly after we’ve gotten in the car his phone starts ringing. 

  “Dad? Yeah, we’re on our way right now. Wait- what? Why’s Kate going? She never goes. No. I don’t give a fuck dad. I’m not a kid anymore, you can’t make me say hi.”

  My attentions perks up at Kate’s name. Kate’s going to be there? Thank god. Usually when she goes and I’m there and Spencer’s busy with... Spencer things she’ll find me and keep me company. 

  “k. bye.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Kate’s there. And my dad is making me say hello.” 

  “Kate’s there? Why?” I say questioning. 

  “Yeah. Why do you care?”

  “I don’t.” 

  The silence is almost painful so I start up a civil conversation. “How long do you think we’ll be here?” 

  “God do you ever stop talking?! My head is pounding.”

  “Right. Sorry.” 

  I take my phone out of my clutch pull up Kate’s contact, we don’t text much since we only see eachother when I’m working but we’ve texted a few short times.

Me: i heard your gonna be there tn? 

Kate: Unfortunately, yeah

Me: oh ok

Kate: Why? You going? 

Me: Yup, with Spencer.

Kate: ah Spencer, what a delight.

Me: He’s had a long week.

Kate: You give him to much credit. 

  After a couple minutes of me not responding due to me not knowing how to respond Kate sends a second text: Don’t worry about it. I’ll see you there. k?

Me: K

  When we arrive at the gala Spencer’s dad meets us at the front. 

  “I still can’t believe you wore that.”

  “Son. Not now.” 

 “Miss Y/N, you look beautiful tonight.”

  “Thank you, James.”

  “Well you two better get going, make sure to network Spencer, It is a networking event after all.” 

  After I’ve said hi to some of Spencer’s colleagues and friends Spencer starts looking around. 

  “Who’re you looking for?” I ask

  “Kate. Dad will be on my ass if I don’t say hi.”

  I start looking all around the ballroom as I see Kate already walking towards us in her black suit and hair up.

  “There you are I’ve been waiting for you.” She says resting her hand on my waist,, not acknowledging Spencer. 

  “Hello, Kate.” I tell her my voice barley above a whisper as she pulls me in for a hug, her hand rubbing my back. 

  “Alright, Alright. Stop feeling up my girlfriend. Hello, Katie.” Spencer wraps a hand around my waist, acting like an animal trying to assert dominance. 

  Kate let’s go of me and takes stiff step back, “Spencer. Hi” She says with a tight lipped smile.

  Spencer goes in to shake her hand but she just stares down at it and looks back up to his face, “My name is Kate.”

  Kate looks down at Spencer’s hand and meets my eyes, quirking up an eyebrow, sticking her tongue to the side of her mouth and looking away before looking back at Spencer.

  “Ha. Well, it was great seeing you, but I’ve got some people to talk to.” He unwraps his hand from my waist and starts to turn around. 

  “Wait, where are you going?” I question.

  “Are you deaf? I said I was going to talk to people.” 

  “Who?”

  Shaking his head, he looks back at me shrugging, “Who else? Some of us work real jobs, Y/N”

  Kate’s watching our interaction and I couldn’t be more embarrassed than I am right now.

  I sigh and look up at Kate as I sit down at the nearest table, “Sorry.” 

  “For what?” 

  “Spencer.” I say apologizing for his childish behavior.

  “Well like you said, it’s been a long week.” Kate’s throwing my words back at me. 

  “Yeah. Long week.” 

 I hear her take a few steps closer to me, standing next to where I’m sitting. She hooks a finger under my chin, tilting my head up to grab my attention, “Hey”

  “I need to go find my mom, but I’ll come find you later, yeah?”

  “Yeah, okay.” I say nodding.

  I haven’t seen Spencer since the last time he said he was going to talk to people at the gala, and I’m bored sitting here at the table. Kate said she was going to come find me but that was so long ago, and she still hasn’t shown so I pull out my phone and start scrolling through Instagram. 

  When I look up from my phone, I search the room with my eyes for Spencer seeing as it’s getting kind of late. I finally spot him and he’s in a corner with a blond. Both are holding a drink in their hand, and she’s laughing gripping his bicep as Spencer whispers something in her ear. I keep watching, unable to tear my eyes away from the scene, only hurting myself more. Seconds later Spencer locks eyes with me and disregards the fact that I just saw everything play out. He grabs the blonde woman’s hand and leads her down a hallway.

  I look down at my phone, trying to play it off, trying to keep my cool so I don’t become a pathetic mess at this stupid gala, in front of everyone I work with. 

  I sense someone’s presence next to me and a musky scent of lavender and mahogany, knowing who it is I look up at her. I look up at Kate. 

  “Come on.” She tells me, already starting to walk, motioning for me to follow her.

  “Where are we going?”

  “You’ll see, Y/N”

  We reach a room towards the middle of the hallway and she opens the door for me, following right behind me, closing the door.

Looking around I notice it's a room with some shelves, a desk, and a fireplace. A study of some sort.

"Kate wha-"

Still facing the door she says, "Can you believe it? We're finally alone."

Turing around she looks me in my eyes and starts walking over to me, by the desk.

"No Spencer. Just me and you."

"Wha-" I try to get a word out.

Kate inches closer to me, standing directly in front of me, as I also move backward, closer to the front of the desk.

"He's dancing. You're alone. I came to find you. What are the chances, Y/N."

She moves even closer, who knew that was possible? I move backwards some more, making room for her. I'm practically sitting on the edge of the desk as she stands between my legs.

She glances back at the door as she stands close enough to emit some tension. I'm looking down not sure of what's going on but not being against it, as Kate looks down at me.

"Y/N?"

"Kate?"

I raise my eyes to her face, focusing on her mouth not having the courage to look her in the eyes yet.

"I swear, the universe must've read my mind. And what was I supposed to do? Not take my chance?"

"Kate, I still have no clue what you're talking about." I state taking a big gulp.

She grabs my hand and hooks her finger under my chin, forcing me to look her in the eyes, just as she did earlier. She moves a piece of hair out of my face and grabs my wrist, turning it over to trace the palm of hand.

"You know you deserve better than that right?"

"I-"

"I mean what was he doing over there when he could’ve been with you, looking like this."

"What do you mean, Kate?"

"You and Spencer. You used to always be so happy with him and now... you seem kinda miserable. You come to work, and you go into your office, and you keep checking your phone to see if he's texted or called. And he doesn't. You get on the phone with him asking him to lunch on your break and you get off the phone with tears streaming down your face. You call your friends and talk to them about it, I heard how he treats you. You come in super early, looking next to dead because you were awake all night waiting up for him. He treats you like a piece of property that can be altered to his convenience at any moment"

"I'm not saying any of that is true, Kate, but how do you know all this?" I ask.

"You think I 've been coming to work just because I wanted to? I hate it there. I come in because I know you're there. You think I'm not utterly mesmerized by your every move to not watch you all day?"

"I don't know what to say."

Kate looks up from my palm, and puts it on my lap, "Then let me do the talking."

I make eye contact as I say, "Okay." Barely above a whisper.

Kate inches even closer, pulling me into her and goes to my ear, "If I were your boyfriend, I never would've left you alone at that table, I wouldn't even have looked the way of another women if it were you at my side, and I know sure as fuck I wouldn't have left you alone for someone else to drag you into a study all alone."

I can still feel her lips barely touching my ear as I ask, "What're you saying, Kate."

"What I'm saying is-"

Kate gives a quick kiss to my ear, "is that I could be a better boyfriend."

She moves right below my ear, and kisses me again, "a better girlfriend."

She goes lower and gives me another kiss, "I could do everything he was never able to do."

Kate moves to the base of neck and starts placing multiple kisses on my skin, hardly giving in, " I want to steal you from him, Y/N"

I suck in a breath as she continues, " I would treat you right, better even. We would both benefit from this and deep down you know it."

She starts kissing back up my neck, " I don't mean to tell you twice, but sweetheart he will never be able to satisfy you, in more ways than one, that is."

She looks up, and looks me in the eye, "If I could give you some advice, I would leave with me tonight, Y/N."

I find myself agreeing with very word Kate is whispering into my ear and give her a nod.

"I'm sorry I didn't catch that, what?"

"Yes. I said Yes." My breathing is uneven due to Kate's shenanigans.

She presses a kiss to the corner of my mouth, pats the outside my thigh and hands me her hand to help me off the desk.

"What about Spencer, Kate?"

"Forget about Spencer. We'll just walk out, hopefully the asshole will get the memo. I don't want hear his name ever again."

So, that's what we do, Kate has her hand wrapped all the way around my waist as we walk to the doors, ignoring the stares.

We hear fast footsteps feet away from us, “Y/N!" We hear Spencer yell.

"Don't turn around." Kate tells me, she throws him the finger, still looking straight forward, exiting.

[hintofelation99]

Justice League Babysits Dick

Aquaman, picking Dick up from school

Aquman: Hi, kiddo. Batman had to go out of town, so you’ll be spending the night at the manor with the league.

Dick: Ok! Hey, wanna see a trick?

Aquaman: Um, sure?

Dick proceeds to jump out of the moving car.

————

Superman: I still can’t believe we are just going along with Batman bringing a CHILD out on patrol with him!

Flash: I still can’t believe we got talked into babysitting him.

Green Lantern (GL): More like ordered to, there wasn’t really a choice.

Wonder Woman (WW): All of you stop. Clark, the Robin is young, but he has the heart of a warrior. It is not our place to drive him from the battlefield. And you two, stop complaining Arthur will be back any minute with the Robin and I do not want the little bird to hear your fighting.

Flash: Oh there they are! Hey Arthur!

Aquaman: Here’s the kid. I’m going to bed.

GL: But it’s the middle of the day?

Aquaman: Spend a few minutes with the kid, then you’ll understand

GL: Oh, okay?

Dick: Bye Mr. Aquaman!!

————

Dick: HimynameisRichardbutyoucancallme-

Flash: Okay kid, that’s a bit fast. Even for me.

Dick: Sorry! My name is Richard Grayson but you can call me Dick. Wait?! Are we using made up names? Okokok, forget everything I said before! My name is Robin! I’m an acrobat and I-

GL: Are we sure this is Batman’s kid? When did he even have time to raise a child

Dick: Oh, Bruce isn’t my real dad. He adopted me after I watched my parents fall to their death

GL: W-what?

Dick: Yeah they were murdered.

GL: ...

Dick: I still have nightmares about it

GL, whispering to Wonder Woman: why is he still smiling??

Dick: It’s to hide the pain

GL: I think I understand what Aquaman meant now. I’m gonna go to bed too.

Flash, muttering under his breath: Coward

Dick: Bye Mr. Green Lantern! Wow he seems odd, ya know Batman says he’s an imbecile but I don’t know he doesn’t seem [rambling continues for like 20 minutes]

————

Dick: Hey Mr. Flash, can I help you cook dinner?

Flash: You can call me Barry, Dick. And sure, I’d love your help. Can you fill this pot with water?

5 minutes later

Flash: HOW DID YOU SET THE SINK ON FIRE??

Dick: I DON’T KNOW??

————

Dick: Thanks for helping me with my homework Ms. Diana, Mr. Barry said he would but then Aquaman and Green Lantern called and he had to go.

WW: Of course little bird, I’m always happy to help. So question 1-

Dick: Hey Ms. Diana look what I can do!

Jumps from banister to chandelier to couch

WW: NO!

30 minutes later

WW: Clark, it’s your turn with the kid.

Superman: Oh my god, Diana are you okay??

WW: He just doesn’t stop moving? And he jumps off of everything, I think this child has a death wish!

Superman: Why don’t you head to bed, I’ll take care of him.

WW: Fine, just be careful, the kid will jump from anything.

————

Clark: Hey Dick, how about we play a game of tag?

Dick: REALLY?!

Clark: Yeah!

4 hours of non-stop tag across the roof tops of Gotham.

Clark: Ok, time to get ready for bed, alright?

Dick, trying to hide a yawn: Ok uncle Clark

————

The next day

WW: I feel bad for leaving Clark last night

GL: He was probably alright, probably.

Flash: The kid just had so much energy, and he set water on fire?

Aquaman: Why did we leave Clark alone with him?!

WW: It’s almost 10:30 and they do not appear to be awake. Do you think they’re dead

Clark: Haha ok I promise next Friday I’ll take you flying!

Clark and Dick walk into the kitchen with Dick on Clark’s shoulders looking calm, they’ve clearly been awake for hours.

Clark: Look who’s finally up!

Flash: You’ve been awake this whole time??

Clark: Yeah I took Dick flying and then to the park to burn some energy.

WW: But how did you keep him from trying to jump from fatal heights?

Flash: Or from setting things on fire?

GL: And what about he non-stop talking?

Aquaman: HOW DID YOU KEEP HIM FROM JUMPING INTO TRAFFIC??

Clark: He’s just... a bit energetic? All he needed was an outlet for that energy.

WW, smiling: It sounds like you found the Robin’s weakness

-----------

Next ->

[whyse7vn]

FLOW -

[ kim taehyung x reader ]

TAE ( ´(ｴ)ˋ )

taehyung: baby was just in the store

and the worker lady came and asked me what the flow was like

at first i was like

???

but then it clicked

so then i dropped the hardest freestyle known to man

like no joke was wayyy better than anything yoongi joon or hobi would spit

and i KNOW she was fucking with it cuz she was like

“heavy?”

LIKE YES MY FLOW HEAVY AS HELLL

y/n: are you actually brain dead be honest

taehyung: don’t be mad cuz you don’t flow like me

y/n: i do flow

taehyung: NO WAY?????

didn’t know u got down like that pretty

should we battle or something

let’s get the worker lady to judge it

y/n: did you get the fucking pads or not?

taehyung: what

y/n: taehyung

taehyung: taehyung

y/n: yes or no

taehyung: oh

y/n: don’t oh me

taehyung: um

y/n: taehyung

taehyung: ok i see where i went wrong lolz

i was standing in front of the little period isle when she asked about flow

in my defence she should of been more specific

like i’m kim taehyung

ofc i’m gonna be thinking about music

like that’s my whole life

y/n: you had a mask on no?

taehyung: yeah

but i have real recognisable eyes she should of known

y/n: or maybe you should of had some fucking common sense?????

taehyung: i did

it’s very common to confuse flows

y/n: you were standing in the pad isle and chose to freestyle

taehyung: did do that

y/n: you amaze me

taehyung: thank u ❤️

y/n: that was not a compliment

taehyung: i’m pretty sure it was

y/n: i’m telling you it’s not

taehyung: someone’s on her period 😭

y/n: I AM

i’m actually going to strangle you

wow

taehyung: almost home

y/n: do not come back

taehyung: let’s get the pads together

and like idk what size pussy you wear so like you can help

y/n: stop talking to me

oh my god

i hate you

i actually hate you

taehyung: is ur pussy big???

be honest

y/n: STOP TALKING

IM BEGGING YOU

taehyung: small medium or large

just like a coke from mcdonalds

tell me babe

y/n: you did not just compare my pussy to a fucking mcdonalds coke

taehyung: would you of preferred i said sprite??

y/n: go

away

taehyung: meow

are you mad at me????

what did i do

baby :(((((((((((

y/n: if you do not come home with my fucking pads and flowers i’m not letting u in

taehyung: what about mcdonalds???

y/n: fuck off

taehyung: ur telling me ur not hungry rn…

y/n: are you trying to call me big??

taehyung: the biggest!!!

y/n: blocked.

taehyung: HEART

THE BIGGEST HEART OH MY GOD BABE I SWEAR

OH MY GODDD I SWEAR THE BIGGEST HEART U HAVE IT I WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY THAT

ITS HARD TO TYPE AND WALK I SWEAR OH MY GOD

y/n: don’t care kys

taehyung:

y/n: what the actual fuck is wrong with you

taehyung: wrong photo

there you go

🫰🏻🫰🏻🫰🏻

why they kinda look like us waitttt

y/n: that is a white man and woman

taehyung: us in an alternate universe

y/n: bye

taehyung: baby talk to me pls

come back

let’s love

not fight

#lovewins

not hate

let’s hold hands

skip in some fields

let’s paint

omg paint me like one of ur french girls

didn’t that girl that like almost drown say that

lol

flipping loser

i could never drown

put me in the middle of the ocean and i wouldn’t drown i’m telling you

i’m a swimmer

not a drowner

put me in a hurricane bro

y/n: hurricane??

taehyung: the big wave of water thing

y/n: a tsunami????

taehyung: is that not a dessert…

y/n: what

taehyung: tsunami

y/n: no

taehyung: babe…

y/n: just piss off actually

taehyung: i told you

y/n: that literally says tiramisu

taehyung: exactly

y/n: last words

taehyung: chicken nuggets?

you can no longer send messages to this contact!

taehyung:

aw wait wtf :/

—

silly little silly post

don’t hold me to this btw these are just quick silly little sillies you get me??? probably not but it’s ok cuz i get it and that’s all that matters in life sighs

i could be a poet guys i’m telling you

tags: @piw6n @jvmisvu @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @indigobsessed @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @seokmyballs @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @yojaschill @k4ngelz @junghoseokshusband

[thr-333]

Drastic Measures- Part 5

@daminette-december2019-2020

~Sweater~

Shoves romance to the side and shoves friendship in your face!!!

Ao3

First< Previous > Next

----------

“Marinette,” Adrien whines as she opens the curtain the second they get back, “Sleep,”

“Just a minute, I want to design Damian something,” Marinette takes up residence at the desk, throwing open her sketchbook, “I will be friends with him!”

“Wasn't he kind of a jerk to you?” Adrien flops onto the bed, Plagg rig after him, "I think we should go back to that point, maybe sleep on it,"

“You were a jerk too~” Marinette sing-songs finishing up a rough sketch of a sweater.

“I was trying to get the gum off your seat!” Adrien slams his hands down.

“Sure you were~”

“Mariiiiiii,” Adrien collapses back into the bed covers, muffling his whining.

“Come on you,” Marinette collects her sketchbook, “Come get material with me,”

“No, it’s time to sleep,”

“It’s midday,”

“Your point?”

"Ok, Plagg 2.0 should I get you some camembert while I'm out too?"

"I'm up!" Adrien sits bolt upright, "Never call me that again,"

Marinette ends up dragging Adrien out of the mansion he pouts as Alfred delivers them into the city she thanks him profusely.

“We were just in the city why didn’t you pick up fabric then?” Adrien walks by her side down the street.

“Because I’m stuck between 2 concepts and I need to see the fabric before going forward,” Marinette bounces along looking through the windows there are quite a few craft shops in the area which suits her just fine.

“Please don’t run off,” Adrien gently holds her sleeve, “Marinette this city…”

“It’s filled with a dark energy,” Marinette agrees, even in this nicer area had something ominous hanging over it, “It’s like it’s seeped into the city’s very bones,”

“And the Akuma aren’t helping things,” A child across the street starts crying and they both instinctively lookout.

“On the plus side at least hawkmoth doesn't send Akuma after every little thing,” Marinette forces herself to relax, moving on as the kids parents comfort them.

“On the downside, he sends them after emotions that are a lot worse,” Adrien follows along into a store as Marinette filters through the shelves.

“Maybe but we can handle this,” Marinette absent-mindedly raises her fist, meeting Adreins, “Do you think I should make something for everyone, you know as a thank you?”

“I haven't gotten them anything,” Adrien takes the armful of fabric Marinette passes him as she brings out her sketchbook to select old designs.

“I’ll handle the making,” Marinette ticks off a vest she thinks with be perfect for Bruce, “And you handle the finances,”

“I stole my father's credit card,” Adrien says with a grin, “He’ll probably find out where I am soon anyway so might as well start using it,”

“In that case,” Marinette pulls out a roll of incredibly expensive fabric, “We also need new phones,”

“And we should go out for lunch,”

“Get our hair done?” Marinette adds, looking at her half hacked off hair “I still need to fix mine from this,”

“I was thinking our room could use a chair?”

“And the bookshelf is looking a bit empty,”

“A nice expensive rug would really liven up the room,”

“Would it be completely inappropriate to get a motorcycle?”

“Yes,” Adrien agrees, “Let's do it,”

They stop to get new phones first, having destroyed their old ones when they ran away. Adrien finds the most expensive restaurant in town, but it's on the far end so they stop to get a motorcycle first.

“I didn’t know you could ride,” Adrien gestures for the waiter in their private room, “Yes can I please have the duck?”

“My Nona taught me,” Marinette sips at the most expensive drink she can legally buy, “I thought you hated duck?”

“Oh I do,” Adrien grins, which drops when his phone starts ringing, “How did he even get this number?”

Marinette looks over his shoulder to see Gabriel trying to call. Adrien purposefully hangs up rolling his eyes.

“We should go do our hair next,” Adrien leans over the table with a manic grin, ”I was thinking of dying it hot pink,”

“Love the concept,” Marinette cringes at the very thought, “But the execution is flawed, you need to dye it a color you actually like not one just to spite your father otherwise he's still just controlling your life, just in a different way,”

“You're right,” Adrien sighs leaning back examining his blonde locks, “What do you think?”

“A nice pastel or cherry blossom pink would look amazing,” Adrien perks up at the suggestion he can still keep the pink, “Actually I might do that too- oh wait! Will that affect our transformation?”

“Not unless you really want to deep down,” Tikki explains, her and Plagg gorging themselves on expensive cheese and treats.

“Well deep down I really don't want to give away our identities like this,”

“It’s a plan then,” Adrien smiles, “Now do you want to order anything else?”

“Thanks but I’m full,”

“What's that got to do with anything?”

 ---

 “Looks great Nette,” Adrien gives her a side hug, the hairdresser shooing him away while he does the final touch-ups.

“Are you talking to me or yourself?” Marinette smiles at the new and improved shock of pink hair.

“Well obviously I look fabulous, but you look great too,” Marinette rolls her eyes at him looking back in the mirror. Instead of evening out her hair, they had made it look like her little episode was actually intentional giving it nice layers and even doing an undercut on the other side. Unlike Adrien, she didn't go all pink, instead the tips being white ombre up to pink and then her natural hair color.

“Thanks, you have to send a picture of your hair to Nino he's more invested in your teenage rebellion than you are, he’s probably also hurt you left him out of the running away part,”

“He has suggested, more than once, running away together,”

“Why what's wrong with Nino's family?”

“Nothing at all,” Adrien quickly covers, “I think he just really wanted me to run away, his mum offered to pack us lunches,”

“Well, maybe we could have used the turtle,” Marinette sighs, “But I could do that to Nino, you already had to leave Kagami behind, have you given her a call yet?”

“Oh um, about that-" Adrien points at her tapping his chin thoughtfully, "Never mention it again,”

“Adrien,” Marinette scowls, “Call your girlfriend,”

“She’ll kill me,” Adrien hides partly behind a seat looking meek, “Also you don't get to lecture me, you haven't called your parents,”

“That's different,” Marinette groans sinking into the seat, only to get told off for moving, “They’ll want me to come home, how am I supposed to explain that I can’t,”

“They’re your parents,” Adrien stresses, “I’m sure they’ll be happy enough to know your ok,”

“Maybe,” Marinette hums, the cloth being removed from her shoulders letting her get up, “I just feel so bad for putting them through this,”

“Maybe one day they’ll understand,” Adrien walks with her to the front to pay.

“Maybe,” Marinette looks down at the bill, “Wow this is a lot more expensive than the usual dye job,”

Made sense because they were in the higher income distinct of the city.

“Why Marinette,” Adrien grins swiping the card, “That's the point,”

Ten minutes later they were laughing as calls kept pouring in one after the other. They are only interrupted when they get the distinct feeling of an Akuma.

“Duty calls,” Adrien sighs putting his phone on silent.

“Seems so, at least we can call out skills multiple times," Marinette walks casually into an alley with him, “What are you up to?”

“About three,” Adrien shrugs transforming, “It takes about double the time for the transformation to drop now,”

“Same, wish I could say that gives us the edge but really it only keeps us from falling off the cliff,” Marinette also transforms, her new costume bringing a smile to her face.

“How eloquent my lady,” Marinette playfully pushes him, Chat catches himself catapulting over the building, she quickly follows behind.

The Akuma is standard, Marinette guesses the akumatized item is the wrist watch. The problem comes with their recurring thorn in her side.

“Ladybug-”

“Get out of the city,” She cuts Batman off, “Yeah, yeah let us handle this first,”

Marinette throws her yoyo out just in time to deflect an attack headed at Chat.

“Do you need any help?” Robin asks, Marinette smiles, partly at the aghast face Batman makes.

“Do you think you could tag-team it with me?” She asks formulating a plan, with the extra help she might not need the lucky charm, “Make your attacks big and draw his attention, grab the wristwatch if you can,”

“On it,” Robin gives her a nod jumping into the fray, Ladybug doesn't give batman a chance to object running after.

Robin does a good job they work in perfect sync falling back when the other moves to make an attack. When the Akuma focuses on them too much Chat swoops in and gets their attention giving them the chance to swipe at the wristwatch. It goes on she sees Robin get thrown back after another failed swipe at the wristwatch. Ladybug takes the chance to move forward grabbing for the wrist, she isn't watching out for the other arm, the impact hitting and sending her flying back.

“I got you,” Her momentum is stopped by a hand bracing at her back, saving her from crashing into the adjacent building.

“Thanks, Robin,” He helps steady her as she finds her footing again, “I’ll move in you follow me up,”

“No need,” He smirks brandishing the watch.

“You did it,” Ladybug beams, taking the watch and smashing it to the ground, “Great job!”

“Ah, thanks,” Ladybug doesn't pay attention to how Robin brushes, focusing on purifying the Akuma and fixing the damage.

“We made a pretty good team,” Ladybug turns to Robin when everything is settled, “Pound it,”

Robin meets her fist with some hesitance, which disappears when she smiles at him again.

“Ladybug!” Batman yells heading their way.

“Ops sorry,” Ladybug cringes, “Sorry! Cant stop gotta go, bye bye!”

They run from the scene faster than Batman can hope to catch them. They end up back at her newly brought bike stacked with fabric and protected by a bit of luck. Marinette races home to make everyone's gifts, knowing just who she wanted to start with.

 ---

 “There you are!” Marinette exclaims, having spent the past half hour searching the manor for him.

“What do you want?” Damian snaps as if he wasn't just playing with the cat on the floor half a second ago.

“Nothing, I made something for you~” He continues to scowl but Marinette doesn't let it discourage her, “Here, I didn’t know your size so I made a baggier style, do you like it?”

Damian takes the sweater holding it up to where she put it on him looking down a little shocked. Marinette almost wants to laugh at the expressions trying to shift back from awe to disinterest, it’s cute. She smiles wondering what his face would look like if she made a matching one for the cat, and maybe Titus too.

“.... It’s well made,” Damian eventually allows, folding it over his arm, Marinette notices how his fingers linger on the soft fabric.

“Good to know,” She smiles, bidding him goodbye before the moment can be ruined. She bounces down the hall humming to herself.

“Someone's happy,” Tikki flies out of her bag.

“He liked it, why wouldn't I be happy?”

“Someones really happy,”

“Stop it Tikki,” Marinette giggles, making the kwami laugh in turn.

“Just like adrien~” Tikki sing songs floating down the hall ahead of her.

“Well then, keep Kagami far away from this one,”

“Don’t turn into a stuttering mess and we have a deal,” Tikki agrees.

“Please Tikki I’m not thirteen anymore,” Marinette brushes her off, ready to go make the others gifts, if she spent the whole time humming to herself Tikki wasn't going to explain why to Adrien.

---------

Taglist? nope don’t have one, horrible at keeping track of them sorry~

[imagines-r-s]

sticking it - j. farabee

chapter 6

a/n: now you’ll all see why i said be excited for ch. 6 lmao. (also, with ch. 5 not showing up in the tags for a minute, some might not have seen it, so i’ll link it here) but anyways, this chapter was difficult to write bc i’m not used to writing anything but angst lmao. and huge shoutout to my baby gracie for helping me out with this chapter. please enjoy and i’d love to hear feedback

also, like i told an anon, this is in memory of bee’s hair :((  (he still looks good with the new hair, don’t get me wrong)

taglist: @butgilinsky @barbienoturbby @sunsetholland​ @lovenhlboys @sortagaysortahigh @hockey-racing-fubol @oopsiedoopsie23 @iwantahockeyhimbo @dreamsndior

warnings: (2) your mom jokes, jealous!joel?, once again simp nation for the both of them, swearing (it’s a problem ngl), idiocy 

sticking it masterlist

wc: 4.1k

(gif not mine)

When you told Marcus and Michelle that you had to be out for a month, they advised you to only come to the gym three times a week for two hours for the first two weeks and you’d figure out a plan for the two weeks after, that way you could take a much needed break out of the gym. The thing stressing you out the most was gym and they obviously realized it, so they were hopeful it would give you a chance to breathe. 

You planned to go to the gym Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays from 6-8am and then you would spend the rest of your day at home doing whatever you needed to do that day. The first Monday you spent those two hours doing ab workouts and helping the other girls around the gym, then you went home and stayed in your room for the rest of the day. You put your phone on do not disturb, so no one heard from you, which caused Kevin to come to your apartment to make sure you were okay. 

Tuesday played out the exact same way, early practice, then going home and staying in bed, and Kevin coming to make sure you were alright. Kevin even invited you to come out with him and some of the boys, which you politely declined saying they should have their time together. Wednesday, you simply stayed in bed, choosing to actually keep your phone on today, you were just tired and felt drained from everything going on right now that you couldn’t really muster up the energy to talk to anyone. 

Wednesday night, as you were rewatching Marvel movies, your phone started ringing with a call from Ryanne. Quickly answering it, “hey Ry.”

“Hey babes, how’re you doing?”

“I’ve been better, I’ve also been worse, so.”

“Me and Claude were wondering if you’d want to come over and hang out with us and Gav for some of the day, we’ll provide food and such, but we miss you, babe. So, we figured we’d ask while you have a chance.” 

In reality, Ryanne had heard from Claude that you wouldn’t be able to do extensive training for at least a month. She might not have known much about gymnastics, but she knew you well enough to know that you were always constantly training - she was well aware that if that ever got taken from Claude that he would be devastated if he was out for that long and with two weeks to prepare for a big game.

She had checked in to see how you were with Kevin one day after practice and when he mentioned everything that was going on, she was worried about you. She knew that she likely wouldn’t be able to help much, but she did know that there was one part of the equation she could help. Knowing that she already had a plan to have a send off party before the boys went on a roadie and also knowing that everyone on the team would be there, she somehow conveniently planned to invite you over a few hours before it started. 

“Oh, yeah, I’d love to, honestly. What time do you want me over?”

“Anytime after three is fine. I’ll see you then, hun. Oh, and wear something cute.”

“Why exactly?”

“Just do it,” Ryanne said, not having time to think of an excuse, “bye.”

As you were about to say something else, the ring that told you she had hung up rang out. 

…..

Joel wasn’t doing as good as he wanted to be recently and with an upcoming roadie, he knew he needed to spend more time on the ice before the game. Having asked a few of the guys to work with him during an unscheduled morning skate, he was able to work on what he needed to. 

“Wait, so she’s out how long?” Joel overheard Travis ask Kevin as he made his way into the locker room. 

“Like four weeks, but two weeks with the brace and basically no training, then two weeks with athletic tape on her knee and no hard landings. But she’ll only have two weeks before Championships, so she's not feeling too great about it. Plus, she has to use her brace and crutches again and she didn’t enjoy that the first time,” Kevin replied. 

“Is she going to be okay?” Joel hadn’t meant to ask his question aloud, but as soon as Kevin heard his voice a smile grew on his face. 

“Yeah, Lover Boy, she’ll be fine. She hasn’t really been up to do anything recently, but other than that I think she’ll be okay. She has to use her crutches again, which is honestly very entertaining,” Kevin stated before turning to leave the locker room, turning right as he got to the doorway, “random question, are you planning on going to G’s for the send off party tomorrow night?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Just wondering,” and with that Kevin was gone, leaving a confused Joel behind. 

Kevin knew that you had a lot on your plate right now and that you wouldn’t want to go to anyone about your problems. He also knew that the both you and Joel, were simply too stubborn to fix the problem going on between you on your own, hence why he had mentioned something to Ryanne. He knew that Ryanne would jump at the chance to be able to help you feel better and as soon as she mentioned the party set-up idea, he was in. The plan was then mentioned to most of the team, knowing that the help of many was needed in order to help the two idiots. 

….. 

After sending Kevin a quick text that you were leaving, you left your apartment and made your way to Ryanne and Claude’s house. Gently knocking on the door, you smiled when Ryanne opened the door, “awe, babe, I’m so happy you’re here, I missed you so much.”

“I missed you, too. Not to be rude, but where is the tiny human?” you asked, looking past Ryanne to see Gavin walking towards you, “hi, bub. Oh my god, you’re getting so big.” 

“Well if you came around more often, you’d get to see him more,” Ryanne mumbled, watching you play with the boy in front of you. 

“I heard that,” you said, in a sing-song voice.

“You were supposed to,” she replied, mocking your tone, “anyways, Claude is on his way back from the store, so he’ll be here soon, but I haven’t talked to you in forever, how’s everything? How’s gym?”

“Oh, well. I’ve been better, this last meet definitely wasn’t all that great and not being able to train doesn’t really help my case either, but I’m making the most of it,” you said, shrugging. 

“And you’re actually having to listen to Adrian this time around?” she said, pointedly, causing you to chuckle. 

“Yeah, I have to actually listen to Adrian this time,” you smiled, “I hate that I have to actually wear my knee brace, though. And I have to use crutches. Can you believe that?”

“Considering it’s you, I’m more shocked that you’re actually using them.” 

“Ry, shh, let’s not call me out too much today,” you replied. 

It wasn’t too long before you heard the front door open, Claude walking in a few seconds later, “awe, it’s my favorite babysitter. Come on, babe, let’s leave while we can.”

“Haha, I almost forgot how funny you are, G,” you said, sarcastically. 

“I’m sure, I’m sure. You know what would be nice though?”

“What?”

“Helping me put the groceries up,” he said, smiling sweetly causing you to groan. 

“Are chores and babysitting all I’m good for to you?”

“Well,” he looked up to the ceiling, as if he were thinking for another answer,”hm, nothing comes to mind, y/n/n.”

“Oh, that was mean,” Ryanne said, playfully elbowing Claude. 

“Thank-”

“She’ll never babysit again if we’re mean to her,” Ryanne smirked. 

“Oh, wow, I see how it is, don’t worry,” you said, the three of you laughing. 

As the three of you were setting out groceries - you mostly sitting on the kitchen island, taking things out of the bag - the three of you caught up. Claude talking about his hopes for these next few games, Ryanne talking about how Gavin was doing - not missing the few times Gav ran through the kitchen -, and you talking about whatever you could. 

“Ok, so we haven’t brought this up yet, but I was just wondering if you had any idea what’s going on with Beezer? I know you guys had gotten closer recently and he’s just not himself, so I’m asking if you know anything,” Claude asked, closing the fridge before turning back to you. Both him and Ryanne had a pretty good idea of what happened, but if they were missing something, they wanted to know. 

“Oh, um, well, about that one,” you sighed, gathering your thoughts, “me and him kinda haven’t talked since I told him I only wanted to be friends.” 

“Ok, but from the looks of it, it looked like both of you wanted to be more than friends?” 

“Yeah, but, there’s a lot more to it, you know.”

“No, actually, I’m a tad bit lost, y/n/n.”

“Look, I can’t have any distractions right now and I was worried about it affecting gymnastics, so I told him I only want to be friends.”

“That’s dumb,” Claude replied, quickly.

“Thank you, many people have mentioned that.”

“He has no place to talk in a situation like this,” Ryanne finally spoke up, causing you to look between the pair confused, “when his life was just hockey, hockey, and hockey, nothing could fill those spots. So, when our relationship was first starting he did the same thing to me that you’re doing to Bee.”

“This was supposed to be a philosophical moment and you messed it up,” Claude replied. 

“I didn’t mess it up, you’re just mad because you basically called yourself dumb. But pushing him away isn’t a smart option and it just hurts both of you in the process,” Ryanne said before walking back to where Gavin was. 

“Look, I know you said you didn’t want distractions, but this seems to be having a worse effect on you than you hoped. From the looks of it, when you started pushing him away, it affected your performance. Just pointing that out for you.”

“Yeah, I know. You didn’t have to point it out, you know.”

“Yeah, but you would have continued to ignore the obvious fact that you were just scared of a relationship in general,” he shrugged.

“I don’t even know how to talk to him about it or at least how to start the conversation.”

“Well, lucky for you,” he looked down to check his watch, “the guys are all coming over in like 10 minutes, so you’ll see him then.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah, it’s a send off party for the roadie this weekend, why do you think we got so many groceries?” and with that he left you in the kitchen by yourself. 

…..

Joel sat in the backseat of Kevin’s car, Nolan in the passenger seat, as they made their way to G’s house. By the time they got there, most of the guys had already gotten there, seeing a few familiar cars in the driveway, but one stood out in particular. He knew that it was yours from some of the times he had seen you driving, “what’s y/n/n doing here?”

Nolan and Kevin both chuckled at that, “she came over here earlier to watch Gavin, I think,” Kevin said. 

“Oh, cool,” Joel replied, attempting to sound nonchalant as possible 

“Don’t try to act like you’re not freaking out. You aren’t slick, dude,” Nolan added, shaking his head, “you two better talk, too. Because everyone is tired of the two of you being idiots and not talking shit out.” 

“We’re not idiots.”

“You are,” the other two said in unison. Joel didn’t try to argue as he followed the pair inside their captain’s house. 

As soon as he entered the house, he took note that almost all the team was here, most of the team was outside, but he immediately found you sitting on one of the barstools with Gavin sitting on your lap as you talked with Ryanne. “Go talk to her,” Nolan whispered, causing him to jump. 

“God, Pat. What the fuck?” Joel said turning around. 

“I said what I said. You’ll have to talk at some point, might as well just do it. Plus, she’s on crutches, so like, if she wants to run away it will take her a while.”

“Um, that’s- I mean, that’s valid, but-”

“At some point today, you should talk to her. I obviously can’t make you and it’s up to you, but I think it would help fix things,” Nolan said, shrugging.

“Yeah, I know, I know. I plan on it.” 

You and Ryanne had stayed inside with Gav since the boys were grilling outside, so when Nolan, Kevin, and Joel walked in, you were one of the first people to notice. Kevin made his way over to you almost as soon as he came in, “so, you enjoying the party?”

“Considering I didn’t know it was happening, sure I’m having a great time, Kev.”

“Well, I guess it’s a surprise party then,” you quickly shot him a glare, “surprise.” 

As you heard the back door open, you looked up to see Joel already looking at you, shooting you a quick smile as he followed his teammate to go outside. “I swear, if all you guys do tonight is spare glances at each other and don’t talk, I’m going to lose it,” Ryanne said from beside you. 

“I think everyone will, to be honest,” Kevin added, “well, I’m going outside. If you need any help, just let me know.” 

The boys had a few different plans in place to get the two of you to talk; conveniently sending Joel in to help while you were inside, telling Joel to go help out inside, asking Joel to get Gavin, and as a last resort, make Joel jealous. 

When everyone had been done eating, Claude asked some of the younger guys to help him clean up and bring out the cooler with drinks that was still inside. Joel had somehow conveniently avoided going inside while helping and when he did, he went straight to the kitchen and right back out. He wasn’t wanting to avoid you all night, but he didn’t know what to do. Shortly after, Claude had asked Joel to go in and get Gavin, somehow right as you had left Gavin with Ryanne, which also ruined that plan. 

Ryanne knew that it would be suspicious if they kept trying those same plans. So instead, she basically forced you to go outside with her. She helped you get outside, Kevin shooting up from his chair to help you get down the stairs of the deck, “you don’t have to help me out, Kev.”

“Knowing you, you would trip and break something. You’re already hurt enough,” he said, causing you to roll your eyes. As Kevin looked up, he didn’t miss the way Joel lit up as he saw you, “hey, your boy is looking over here.”

Looking up, your eyes once again met his, to which you sent him a light smile, “yeah, he’s been watching me since I stepped out here.”

“y/n/n, you would only know that if you were looking at him, too.”

“Yeah, I never said that I wasn’t though.” 

“You know, it’s obvious the two of you aren’t mad at each other or anything like that. So, why the fuck haven’t you talked yet?”

“Oh, um. Words are hard,” you said, walking away towards Travis and Nolan on your crutches. 

“You’re literally on crutches, you aren’t moving that fast.”

“You know who else isn’t moving that fast?”

“y/n. I swear, if this is another your-”

“Your mom,” you yelled back to him. 

“What is up with you and making your mom jokes?” Nolan asked as you got closer to them. 

“They’re funny?” 

“y/n/n just has the sense of humor of a middle school boy, that’s why her and Beezer got along so well,” Travis added, helping you move your crutches so you could sit down at the table they were at, “how are the crutches?”

“How’s your mom?” you laughed, causing the two of them to groan, “nah, they’re not fun. In any way shape or form.”

As you were talking to Nolan and Teeks, Kevin and Ryanne realized that none of the plans they had tried were working. Both of them knew that the only plan that would probably work was to make Joel jealous, so Kevin texted Carter, Morgan, Nolan, and Teeks to let them know that was the plan that they were going with. 

“y/n looks really good today,” Carter said, causing Joel to spit out his drink. 

“Better watch yourself, Hartsy,” Joel replied, shooting a glare towards his friend. 

“I was just being honest, she really does. There’s nothing going on between you guys anymore, right?” Carter watched as Joel visibly tensed at the mention of what was happening between the two of you, knowing that the plan was working he continued, “I mean, if nothings going on between you two, then she’s single, right?”

“Well, I mean-” Joel stuttered out, “we haven’t talked in a while, but that doesn’t mean-”

“I’ll be right back, okay?” Carter said, making his way over to the table you were at, causing Nolan and TK to chuckle as they saw Joel’s face drop, “hey, y/n/n.”

“Hey, Hartsy, it’s been a minute. How is everything?” you smiled. You kept talking to the group around you for a while, not noticing the way Joel was becoming visibly angry. He didn’t want to seem jealous, but he assumed that Carter had been flirting with you this whole time, so he made the executive decision to talk to you now. 

Since your back was facing him, you didn’t see him coming, but the three boys around you did, only trying to hide their smiles since the plan was actually working. “Hey y/n, can we talk?” he asked. 

You turned around to finally face the boy you had been avoiding, “yeah, hold on a sec.” As you continued some of your conversation, Joel was getting more and more irritated, mostly because Carter was sending looks his way that he couldn’t exactly read. Joel, being the impatient person he was, pulled the chair you were sitting at away from the table, pulling you up to stand before lifting you up over his shoulder, “Bee, what the fuck?”

He simply ignored you as he carried you up the stairs and back inside his captain’s house. You tried pushing yourself off as he made his way up the stairs, but it was deemed useless when he just tightened his grip, “Farabee, I swear to god. I will hurt you.”

Eventually, he opened the door to the guest bathroom and gently set you down on the counter before locking the door, “what the fuck was that for? If you want to talk, you could have just waited a second. But no, you had to be all dramatic about it,” you said, rolling your eyes. 

“Are you done?” Joel asked, crossing his arms and leaning back against the door.  

“I mean, yeah. Are you?” 

“Yeah, but I’m tired of us ignoring each other and I miss you, so we need to figure stuff out.”

“Awe, you miss me? That’s cute,” you smiled. 

“y/n/n, I swear, now is not the time for that one.”

“Ok, sorry. I’ll be serious now,” you said, crossing your arms to mock him. 

“I just want to know what happened at the lake?” 

“Oh, we’re going straight to the point, alright,” you sighed, “look, what I said at the lake wasn’t true. I got this idea in my head that if you were in my life, you were a distraction from what I wanted.”

“How’d that work out for you?” he said, smirking. 

“Oh, no, see that’s what we’re not going to do. No need for the attitude. Anyways, I had this idea that if anything happened between us, that I would mess it up and it would mess everything in my life up. So, pushing you away was the safest option.”

Joel took a moment to gather his thoughts before pushing himself off the door and made his way closer to you, ending up standing between your legs with his hands on either side of you, “look, I’m saying this and I mean it. I understand where you’re coming from with the fear of distractions thing, but I want you to know that I would never intentionally keep you from your goals and dreams. I’m just extra support, you know.”

“Yeah, I realized that after you ran from the lake house. We could have had this figured out by now, if you had stayed,” you said, sarcastically. Rolling your eyes for added dramatic effect. 

“Oh, shut up. You have no place to talk, babe,” he said, smiling when he heard you giggle, “what was that for?”

“I kinda missed you calling me babe, I guess. Kinda crazy, dude.”

“Awe, so you did miss me?”

“I never said I didn’t,” you said, quietly reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck. You saw the way that his eyes went from your eyes to your lips, “I also missed this,” and with that you pulled him closer until your lips met in a long awaited kiss. 

As the two of you broke away, your foreheads were still together, “hey, Bee?”

“Yeah?”

“You know who else I missed? Your mom,” you laughed. 

“Way to ruin the moment, babe,” he smiled, “That was funny though, so I respect it.”

“Dude, I’m so funny sometimes.”

“Looks aren’t everything, babe,” he said, laughing at the gasp you responded with. 

“Oh, that was rude. I’ll get you back one day though,” you watched as he went to leave the bathroom, “hey, Bee. I’m not supposed to walk without crutches, hate to break it to you.”

Rolling his eyes, he made his way back to you, turning around right in front of you, “here.” You leaned a little bit forward, wrapping your arms around his neck once again as he readjusted his grip on the back of your legs, so he could give you a piggyback ride on the way back outside. 

“You know, they didn’t tell me there was a party,” you spoke as he made his way back towards the door. 

“Oh, they said it was teammates only and then I saw your car,” he replied, pausing a moment as the two of you realized what had happened at the same time, “so, this was-”

“Yep.” 

“And Hartsy saying he was going to ask you out was part of it?”

“Hartsy said he was going to do that,” you started cackling. “Wait, were you jealous of him?” you asked laughing even harder. 

“It’s not funny.”

“Oh, yeah. I know, it’s hilarious.” 

“I will drop you right now,” he said, as he opened the door for outside, “and you’ll stuck right here, Ms. ‘I can’t walk down stairs right now’.”

“That’s a low blow,” you said, as the two of you made your way back to the table you were at. 

“Oops, sorry, babe,” he set you down close to your chair, but sat down before you could.

“Oh, so now you steal my chair, too?”

“Oh, shut up, you’re fine,” he said, pulling you to sit in his lap, “there you go.”

“So, I see the two of you made up?” Nolan asked, pointing at the two of you. 

“We also made out, in case you were wondering,” Joel replied, earning an elbow to the stomach, “ow, that hurt.”

“Sucks to suck, babe,” you replied, causing the smile on his face to grow even more. 

When Kevin and Ryanne watched the two of you walk back outside, they were happy to see that the plan worked. Ryanne simply laughed and shook her head as she heard the exchange between the two of you, “they are so in love and I don’t even think they realize it.”

“Ryanne, that is a big word, that I’m not prepared for. So, please, let’s not do that today,” Kevin replied, earning a laugh from Ryanne, “they’re happy though, that’s all that matters to me.”

[that-intp-vampire]

I posted 950 times in 2021

39 posts created (4%)

911 posts reblogged (96%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 23.4 posts.

I added 233 tags in 2021

#light queues the darkness - 57 posts

#light - 52 posts

#light the vampire - 35 posts

#light annoys everyone - 32 posts

#light has talked - 19 posts

#light wishes you to have a horrible time - 8 posts

#someone asked light something - 8 posts

#i light the fire to get you ash - 8 posts

#light likes talking with tan - 7 posts

#someone tagged light!!!!! - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 104 characters

#light is gretchen wieners but she would have ratted regina out if the whole burn book thing had happened

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

I'm done with aftg and-

(spoilers ahead)

Hello??? How can you leave us with an ending like that-

I like this Mafia shit-

Andriel

Ok but in the end I feel sad for Riko-

KEVIN IS A QUEEN NICE ONE TAN

BURN BOOK WHERE TF ARE YOU??

STUART STUART STUART

BUTCHER GOT BUTCHERED MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-

DAN DAN DAN DAN

RENEE RENEE RENEE RENEE

ALLISON ALLISON ALLISON-

MATT'S MOM>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

MATT GIVES HEAVY TOLYA VIBES DON'T YOU AGREE-

I JUST IMAGINED " KEVIN WYMACK" I'M SORRY THAT'S HILARIOUS-

KEVIN ILLY MY COLD COLD BABY-

KEVIN PLAYS WITH HIS LEFT HAND AAAAAAHHHHH-

KEVIN DEVELOPING A BIG MOUTH LIKE NEIL-

I STAND FOR BISEXUAL! KEVIN

JEREMY IS SOOOO NICE I SHIP HIM WITH KEVIN BYE-

bitches yes-

@drunk-on-inejs-laughter @kazoo-the-demjin @iambecomeyourvillain @kitandtyarelife @stay-because-now-you-have-a-home @ any single one of you who read aftg-

18 notes • Posted 2021-10-30 08:38:18 GMT

#4

Please-

Andrew is a simp-

And damn Nicky stop being so Jesper-y

Andrew is the KNIFE WIFE

@kitandtyarelife @iambecomeyourvillain @kazoo-the-demjin @drunk-on-inejs-laughter @anyone else who read aftg-

23 notes • Posted 2021-10-22 12:43:00 GMT

#3

*clears throat* So.....um this happened 5 days back but I was busy but uhh here we are?

Light's 69 Follower Celebration

So ummm here's what I planned:

🧛‍♀️- You'll get my positive and negative thoughts on you (works off anon)

🎶- I'll assign you a song (If you're on anon give me a description)

❤️- Fmk :)

🩸- Cyms :)

🐧- Edits (I'm not good with GIFs though, will be uploaded on my edits blog, I'll answer with the post link, can be requested for any non-problematic fandom, aesthetic)

🐻‍❄️- Request a fanfic/fic (Goes on my writeblr, same process as edits)

uhhh tags??

@ashisdeadand-dying

@herondalesunsetcurve @drunk-on-inejs-laughter @kazoo-the-demjin @ahecktonoffandomsinoneblog @andaz-e-seher @stay-because-now-you-have-a-home @suvarnarxpa @sankta-chaosqueen @sammiewswift @thehalfbloodfreak @ethereal-puppet @carstairrs @wafflesandschemingfaces @weirdoismymiddlename @lynx-the-treemoss @inureflower @nnazyalensky @moobrvoobl-moobmoob-oobmpoobroom @iambecomeyourvillain @investmentofmyheart @pureheroiines @thebonecarver @anyone I missed tell me-

31 notes • Posted 2021-11-20 06:16:12 GMT

#2

Yeah I know this is sudden but...look I'm exhausted. I feel so overwhelming and I have started having meltdowns. I never have meltdowns. And it's all getting so melodramatic that I think I'll be taking a break from Discord and Tumblr for idk how long. I might look active but I may just be talking calling a friend or it might be an accidental open.

Since you found this, ig the time I gave myself to reconsider has ended and I need the break. Uhhh tagging some people because sure why not?

@suvarnarxpa @matthias-is-alive @ahecktonoffandomsinoneblog @adams-left-hand @neil-perry-the-platypus @kazoo-the-demjin @nightshade3465 @moobrvoobl-moobmoob-oobmpoobroom

@sankta-chaosqueen

Take care guys

41 notes • Posted 2021-09-01 18:31:11 GMT

#1

MARRIAGE OF TAN AND SUNNY

@kazoo-the-demjin@herondalesunsetcurve

Walk down the isle

*starts throwing books, Indian aunties get SJM hardcover mwahahaha*

96 notes • Posted 2021-10-01 16:55:04 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[achillestiel]

the parent trap only works if you’re identical | part two

based on this post by @destiel-is-canon-i-guess which now lives rent free in my brain | Part One 

Dean looked out across the sea of faces for the familiar sight of Claire. After four weeks he had to admit that he’d missed her like crazy. All he wanted to do was get back home and hear all about her summer over some burgers. 

“Hey Dad!” A kid around Claire’s age called out as he raced over to Dean. Dean looked over his shoulder, guessing that there was another parent near him. No. Just Dean. He looked back as the kid stopped at his feet. 

“Think you got me confused for someone else kid. I’m looking for Claire Winchester, you seen her?”

“Dad, it’s obviously me. Claire.” The kid said with a grin. Dean loved kids, especially his own, but sometimes they were freaking annoying. 

"Kid, I've been driving since yesterday morning and I'm pretty beat. Can you grab Claire for me?"

"That might be difficult...she's not here." The kid said as he chewed on his bottom lip. Dean just closed his eyes and let out a long sigh because of course, this wasn't going to be easy when his damn kid was involved.

"That girl, I swear. Send to camp for the summer Dean, she won't get into trouble in Maine Dean. Last time I listen to Sam. Ok kid, where's Claire? Is this gonna be a job for her dad, the sheriff or the FBI?" Dean asked and for what felt like the millionth time he wished that parenting, especially parenting Claire, was easy. 

"That depends...she’s on a train...to meet her dad so I could meet mine..." The kid said, once again worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. For a second Dean was transported to fifteen years before, watching another person bite on his bottom lip as he did the Sunday crossword.  

"She what?" Dean asked and that was finally when Dean looked at the kid. Really looked at him. “Wait...Jack? Jack, is that you?” Dean asked looking down at the kid. The kid’s face broke out into a nervous looking smile. “Oh, holy shit.” Dean gasped out because of all the people he was expecting to see today, Jack was not one of them.

“Hi Dad.” Jack said as Dean pulled him into a fierce hug. “Ok, this is nice.” Jack said into Dean's chest as he hugged Dean back tightly. 

“Damn kid you grew up." Dean said with a laugh. The last time he'd seen Jack, the kid had only been six months old. Now here he was in the flesh looking every inch the miniature Cas clone. "How...what...ok, start from the very beginning. How did any of this happen?" 

"Well, Claire started it."

"She normally does." Dean said with a roll of his eyes. “Ok kid, get the car. I got a call to make.” he added with a sigh. This was going to be...interesting to say the least.

Cas Novak bobbed on the spot as he looked out for Jack. The train station was packed with people and none of them so far has been Jack. Cas looked over the train schedule to make sure that Jack’s train had definitely come in. He looked around once again and nearly jumped a mile when a blonde teenage girl strolled right up to him, grinning from ear to ear. 

“Sup, it’s your boy Jack” the blonde girl said, grinning at Cas like he hung the moon. Cas stared back at her in confusion as his phone began to ring. He pulled it out of his pocket and just stared at the name on the screen. Why on earth was Dean of all people calling him? 

“Hello? Dean, is that you?” Cas asked. The blonde girl groaned and hid her face in her hand. “This is odd, why exactly are you calling me?”

“Hey there Cas. Long time. So listen, our kids are freaking morons.” Dean said over the phone. Cas tried to ignore how much his stomach flipped at the sound of Dean's voice. He was staggered to find that after all these years Dean still had an effect on him. "Um yeah kiddo, you're a moron. Did you two geniuses think this was actually gonna work?" Dean said to someone. 

“Our kids? Dean, is Jack with you?” Cas asked looking back at the blonde girl.  

“Yep, the kid is sat in the car right next to me.” Dean said. “And he won’t stop bugging me to change the channel. At least Claire had some respect for Led Zeppelin.” 

“Wait, so that would make the blonde girl standing next to me...”

“Goddamn, that kid is going to be the death of me. Put Claire on the phone.”

“This is Claire?” Cas asked as he stared at the blonde girl. "You're Claire?" He asked the girl. She nodded her head, suddenly looking nervous and Cas’ heart just gave out completely. He’d last seen his daughter when she was barely six months old and now here she was. All grown up in beat up boots and a flannel shirt that looked like it was really Dean’s. "Oh my god." Cas said, pulling Claire in for a tight hug. 

"Not that this isn’t nice but...dude, you're kinda crushing me." Claire said. 

"I'm sorry." Cas said as he pulled away and just stared. Long gone was the tiny blonde baby, and now here was a teenage girl who seemed to be oozing in Winchester confidence. From the way she stood to the amused look on her face, Cas could see every ounce of Dean Winchester influence. 

"Hey Cas, once you're done with the hugging, put Tweedledum on the phone." Dean said loudly over the phone. Cas sighed and switched his phone over to loudspeaker. 

"Claire is here Dean, she can hear you." 

“Hey, Lindsey Lohan. You know The Parent Trap only works if you’re identical twins...and maybe of the same gender?” Dean said over the loudspeaker. 

"Yeah and the parents in that film sucked so why did you two do the exact same thing huh?" Claire shot back and God, did she remind Cas of Gabriel at that moment. “You call me and Jack morons but-”

"Claire Mary Winchester don’t think about finishing that sentence. You get your annoying butt back home to Kansas before I ground you-"

"Hey dad, am I on speaker?" Claire said, interrupting what Cas knew was going to be one of Dean’s long speeches. 

"You're not on speaker...no, Jack I'm not putting your sister...kid, don’t give me the eyes...stop it, you look way too much like your dad when you do that...ok fine...yes, you're on speakerphone."

"Hi Jack! I don't think our plan worked." Claire said with a shrug. 

"Yeah, me neither. Hi dad!" Jack called out to Cas. Cas let out yet another long sigh and shook his head. 

"Hello Jack. You're grounded." 

"Dang it." Jack said. 

"Claire enough messing around, where are you?" Dean said, sounding more and more exasperated. 

"At a train station with my dad." Claire shot back, still grinning. "And I'm not coming back. You're just gonna have to come and get me."

"Goddamn kid, I swear she gets this stubbornness from you Cas.” Dean said. What surprised Cas the most was that despite how exasperated Dean sounded there was still some affection in his tone “Whereabouts are you guys? I'll bring Tweedledee back to you and drag Tweedledum back to Kansas with me."

"We're in Washington DC, I'll send my you address and we can sort this all out." Cas said.  

"Great. Jack, do up your seat belt and stop trying to change the station. Claire...just don't do anything stupid."

"Scouts honour Dad. Bye!" Claire said, leaning over to end the call. Once she’d hung up she turned to Cas with a giant grin on her face. "So...what now dad?”

Tag List (If you wanna be tagged in parts just lemme know):

@littlerachelbee @imthedoctorlove