#ugh i need to sleep
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all of these arcane s2 teasers feel so overwhelming after having a content drought for like 3 years lmao
#i cant sleep fuck me lmao#my brain is half functioning at this point lmfaoook#its very fun but also im not used to it anymore lmao i remember the olden fandom days where it was weekly content#it feels like a giant wave of content for like 3 months in this streaming era now lol#ugh i need to sleep#night arcaneblr#personal tag
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i haven't seen near enough (any) stupid jokes wherein Harvey corrects Mike: I said I don't like pro bonos. I'm very pro-boner.
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wrote a whole one-shot start to finish in one sitting and MY STUPID LAPTOP DIES and nothing saves. maybe it was a sign it was poopy caca and shouldn't see the light of day (i will be rewriting it soon anyway hopefully)
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I think one of the most deranged terms I have ever heard of is a 'fandom mom'
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Resisting the urge to make a Vincent FNAF au but he deserves it but also the fandom made Vincent the name of Purple Guy for like three years and I don’t want confusion but also my boy would love a FNAF au
#do you see my issue#imagine Vincent coming home to Kerry like ‘dead kids are in the animatronics. also I almost died last night’ and Kerry like …that’s nice#ugh I need to sleep#Andrew rambles
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Listen I love the mess! But I prefer them getting together in their 30/40s😭—they are more mature and they had therapy! So I'm sticking to the soulmate thing! In every life they always found each other!
“In every life they found each other”
#like I know I know we do not like fmo Aemond#but guys… they found each other every universe#one universe was bound to be evil idk 😭#djats fmo au#ugh I need to sleep#I have so much to do tomorrow
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*flops down* good mornin’ Silv
Mmmmmm you’re not wrong
#ugh I need to sleep#i close the next two days and then open#still too keyed up though#asks and answers#links!!!
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I'm only on episode 3x03 and there's already a moment that I want to scream to the heavens about
#!!!!!!!#the bear#the bear spoilers#I will elaborate later#ugh I need to sleep#and then try and binge the rest tomorrow night because I don't want to wait!
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No one talks about abusive relationships where the abuser isn’t completely evil. It’s always about abusers who don’t or can’t love their victims, abusers who are horrible and just want to control their victims, abusers who deserve no empathy
What happens when they love you? When your pain hurts them so bad you hide it? When you know that what they’re doing is horrible, but saying so would break them?
When they called me crying over wanting to kill themself, it wasn’t to manipulate me, it was because they needed to vent. But I was 14, and I know it shouldn’t have happened.
I comfort them, they think of me. I can’t be myself around them for fear of retribution. They insist on hanging up my drawings.
It isn’t healthy in the least, what’s between us, but they don’t mean to abuse me. I know they don’t. So how do I leave knowing that none of it was malicious? How do I hurt them more than they’ve been hurt when they thought I was on their side?
They don’t know anything about me. God, but they love me.
#tw emotional abuse#I don’t think this counts as either writing or poetry#idk I just. I know that their brain damage makes filtering literally impossible#but telling a child their parent thinks their fat is just insane to me#acting like a child shares as much blame in a situation as you#an adult#does#I spent so much of my time feeling guilty for things I did when I was like. nine#when they were 19#and it took sharing an anecdote and realizing that I wasn’t even a teenager in that story#and they were an adult. and acting like I was being immature. when I hadn’t matured#and I don’t know. I don’t think I’m capable of keeping them in my life as an adult#but I also don’t want to ruin their life by leaving. I don’t want their depression to win when they find out what happened to me#but they were there when it happened. they did it#ugh I need to sleep
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usghsduhfiaofh
#ugh drawing this was SUCH a bad idea but im not gonna touch it any more#im so tired but hey these guys#have fun#i dont wanna look at it anymore#wHerES thE EMOTION#maybe i need to do some introspection....#star wars#the clone wars#arc trooper fives#arc trooper echo#clone trooper hevy#clone trooper droidbait#clone trooper cutup#domino squad#and now i have... 5 hours to cram in as much sleep as my insomniac ass can handle#but its ok because domino squad!
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thinking of a new steddie fic/au hmmm.
It’s just the classic, Steve buys weed from Eddie in season 1 era, he and Tommy meet him at the bench in the woods behind school. Steve and Eddie have some playful banter and clearly get along, but it’s dismissed as just a drug deal and they go on about their lives.
Next time they meet is when a frantic Steve comes and finds Eddie after he’s just fought off the demogorgon for the first time. He’s rattled, and skittish, wearing a nasty black bruise on his eye, and just overall not acting like himself. He snaps at Eddie multiple times to just ‘hurry up’ and ‘get him his stuff’, and sure he’s being an asshole, but more than anything Eddie is just concerned. He has never seen The King Steve Harrington lose his cool like this. So Eddie cautiously gives him the weed, making sure not to give too much, and lets him go about his day, but not before asking if he’s alright. Steve clearly wasn’t expecting this and brushes it off defensively, but that doesn’t mean he’s not thinking about it for the rest of his week. How the hell did Eddie Munson notice something was wrong, when his own parents didn’t? Nor his “friends”?
They cross paths again a year later, the beginning of season two. Steve is still with Nancy and has freshly dumped his old douchebag crew of superficial friends. He is still sitting quite comfortably on the higher ranks of popularity, but there is no denying his status is not what it used to be. He comes to buy weed from Eddie in the first week back at school, and it’s a casual interaction. He’s still as charmingly stuck up as he ever was, but now without Tommy there to judge his every move, he seems a little more at ease when making casual conversation with Eddie. Eddie doesn’t mention the year before and Steve is so glad for it, secretly very embarrassed that he went to Eddie for some refuge after arguably his most traumatic experience to date. He gets his stuff, giving Eddie a smirk when he notices he’s dropped the price significantly for Steve when it’s just him alone. Eddie gives him a challenging smile back, almost daring him to call it out, but he doesn’t. They both just laugh and part ways.
The next run in is tina’s halloween party. They notice eachother when Steve first arrives, making eye contact and giving a polite nod. Maybe Eddie lifts his drink up to Steve in a silly salute. They don’t speak at all or make any effort to hang around eachother. That is, until Steve storms down the stairs in a rage after he’d gone up there with Nancy Wheeler. But then are those- tears? Eddie was standing on the front porch smoking a cigarette, trying to discreetly hide from one Billy Hargrove to avoid having to sell him anything, but staying visible enough that he won’t lose all chances of making any money tonight. Steve storms right past him and hits his shoulder. Eddie whips around and is about to call him a dick before he sees who it is.
Steve tries to quickly wipe his face, he won’t make eye contact with Eddie, and he’s clearly trying to get out as fast as he can. Eddie doesn’t let him, though, since he’s obviously not thinking very clearly and is most likely about to do something emotional and stupid. He asks if Steve’s alright, and his answers are all short and rushed, so he’s definitely not. They’re not really friends, but Eddie’s not an asshole.
— “Did you drive?” Eddie asks
“Yeah”
“Well, you’re drunk, Steve. You can’t get behind a wheel right now. And if I knowingly let you, then that makes me an accomplice. I’ll take you home.”
Steve tries to protest, attempting to push past him, but Eddie interjects. “Yeah, yeah, alright! Don’t thank me yet, Steve’o. This is not for you, see, I’m not trying to get a criminal record, here. I cant go to prison, Steve. Do you know what they’d do to a pretty guy like me in prison? Nope, let’s go hot stuff.” —
Eddie takes Steve home. They don’t talk much. By the time they reach Steve’s drive way and Eddie has put his van in park, Steve is making no attempt to exit the vehicle just yet. Eddie doesn’t know what to do, he didn’t really plan this far, so he’s just tapping away awkwardly at his steering wheel while Harrington stares down the dashboard so clearly lost in thought Eddie fears his head might explode. Steve tells Eddie what happened, says it’s ‘relationship troubles’, and he’s not quite sure what compelled him into being so honest with Eddie Munson, but he’s blaming the alcohol. Eddie wasn’t expecting that. They chat for a bit, Eddie makes Steve laugh and considers the whole night a success after that. Then they start cracking jokes about their shared hatred for Hargrove, and Steve looks and sounds a bit more ok to go inside. He thanks Eddie, quite sincerely actually, and it throws him a bit. He stutters a ‘yeah, for sure. It’s no problem.’ And Steve goes home.
After that, it’s a little different. Steve, doesn’t actually really have anyone, anymore. When they go back to school he’s now greeting Eddie here and there in the hallways, making conversation when they find themselves alone together, in the lunch line or at the bathroom sink. He doesn’t approach Eddie when there’s too many people around, though. As much as he’s grown, Steve Harrington still carry’s some prejudice in him about how certain things may make him look. But it doesn’t bother Eddie too much. It’s not like they are really friends, they’re just like, strange acquaintances. And Steve would never deny that they get along, that really Eddie’s ‘not so bad’. So that’s a win.
Steve finds Eddie again not long after the party to buy some more weed, a plan that sparked purely out of boredom. Eddie says yes, of course, but tells him if he wants it today he will need to wait till after school and meet Eddie at his place, since he was busy. So Steve takes a trip to the Munson trailer to make his deal. Eddie invites him inside and they sit together on the couch as he gets Steve’s bag ready. They end up making quite pleasant conversation, joking around and ultimately finding they are really enjoying each other’s company. They enjoy it so much so, that Steve ends up smoking there, with Eddie. So now they are kind of like, hanging out? And it’s fun, so they do it again. Still they’re not, friends friends, they just get along. Eddie just sells Steve weed sometimes and they keep it civil.
He doesn’t hear from Steve for a while, and the next time he sees him it’s from a distance, in passing. The man has the most roughed up face Eddie has ever seen, bruised and swollen in multiple areas, stitches and bandages all over. It’s really, concerning? completely metal, but alarming. This is the second time Eddie has seen the guy all beaten up like that. He knew that boys fight, but surely not that bad? As worried as he was, Eddie doesn’t approach him to ask questions, because they don’t know eachother like that. So he goes on about his day, and he doesn’t see Steve again after that for quite some time.
Then it’s summer, Eddie isn’t graduating again, and he’s not really sure what to do with himself over the break. The new mall has just opened up, and there’s a cool music store up on the second floor that he likes to visit sometimes with his band friends. And wouldn’t you know, working at the Scoops Ahoy located directly across from his favourite store, is Steve Harrington. The guy hasn’t come to Eddie for any weed since last year, and then there was that sighting where he looked like he’d just fallen face first into a flying fist or two, so it’s been a minute since Eddie’s seen him. And he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t a nice surprise. He only goes into scoops once. He’s curious, okay? Sue him. And, he knows the girl who works with him, Robin. So he plays it off like he had no idea he’d see Steve there. And to his surprise, Steve actually acknowledges him. He doesn’t act like Eddie is a total stranger just because they’re not in school anymore. The interaction is quick, they make very casual conversation, Eddie says hi to Robin, grabs his milkshake and goes home. That’s all. He doesn’t go back, and he doesn’t really plan to. Steve’s nice, and he knows Eddie’s around if he needs to buy from him again, and that’s really as far as their relationship goes. That’s all it ever was. It’s been fun getting to know Steve Harrington a little bit better, even if it was just for a short time. Eddie liked having the chance to see in past the quaffed hair and pressed polo shirts to learn that Steve was really just a person under it all. He never thought he’d say it, but Harrington wasn’t so bad. It was a nice little eye opening experience for Eddie.
Eddie was ready to write off his little blips of interaction with Steve Harrington as a thing of the past, no hard feelings, and move on with his life. That is, until he gets a knock at his front door in the middle of the night afew days after the big mall fire. And it’s Steve on the other side. And he looks awful, his face is the worst Eddie’s ever seen it. And he wasn’t really knocking, more like pounding. He says he needs Eddie’s help.
What the fuck?
#and then he#he asks eddie for help getting really strong drugs oit of your system#and if he knows if there’s anything out there that can have long lasting affects on your system#and if he can please have some weed too actually so he can sleep because maybe that will help#because please give me more paranoid steve not just moving on right away from being fuckinh drugged non consensually !!!#i need to see season 3 steve going to eddie for help after the russians because he doesn’t know anywhere else#and eddie is just like what the actual fuck is this man on about ????#what the hell goes on in the harrington household that causes him to get a black eye annually#and now be rambling about getting drugged????#eddie getting so curious about what is actually going on with him#ugh#anyways might write this proper oooh what do we think#stranger things#eddie munson#steve harrington#steddie#robin buckley#st3#stranger things 2#stranger things 3#steve and eddie#steddie fic#steddie au
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I finished inside job yesterday and they announced like 1 hour ago that it was cancelled
Whats the point of releasing 10 shows per month if everyone knows its gonna be cancelled? How can you even bother to engage with a story? Not even mindless media consumption is rewarding i fucking hate here
#not gonna put this on inside job main tag#this is not just about the show#idk im just frustrated because in todays industry I cant even enjoy entertainment without feeling like im wasting my time#i fucking hate capitalism im goign to bite my arm off#ugh i need to sleep
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another wip, that i wont be able to finish for a while
#guys send help and motivation for the next week i have 3 tests and a homework to finish rip#star wars#obi wan kenobi#commander cody#codywan#my art#wip#uni is kicking my ass so badly 😭#trying my best not get back to the mindset i was in the past few months#but its hard like this ugh#at least only a week and exam mont left of this semester#sorry for rambling here 🤣#you guys should watch the vampire gay show#thats what keeps me going its so good#im obsessed with it#i made a typo *month#thise drawing was also inspired by that show#its great show#i think i need sleep why im still rambling here#okay sorry if you are still reading the tags#made another typo *this#*screams silently*
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No thoughts tonight but being close to Levi during a particularly difficult time.
It never got easy to come back from a mission with bodies of people you spent years training with. You and Levi drown yourselves into the work of tying loose ends, paperworks and funerals.
It had been days since you last slept together on the same bed. After all the reports had been sent to Erwin's office, you found Levi sitting on the bed, fully dressed. Your body was sore and your bones were heavy with fatigue and guilt. You tried your very best to be professional during the funerals but the heartbroken stares from hollow eyes of the victims' families screamed "why you? Why not our child?!"
You walked toward your side of the bed, stripping as you go. You pulled one of Levi's clothes from the pile of unfolded clothes and threw it over your head. You stole a glance at Levi, but he did not move a muscle. Signed, you climbed onto the bed and pulled the blanket over your head. You turned your back toward Levi, holding yourself close.
Silence rang so loud between you. You thought for a moment. Carefully, you reach your hand behind your back and tugged at Levi's clothes. Levi was still. And then, you heard him signed. You felt bed shifted under his weight as he stood and undressed himself. He slid under the covers with his back turned toward you.
Your fingers idly touching his bareback, feeling weak warmth from him in days. Levi shifted, and his fingers interlaced with yours. Your palm is warm against his, fingers entwined carefully as if to not scare either one away.
You stayed that way for a while. You couldn't sleep. You knew he was the same too.
Then, Levi turned. And you turned too. Your bodies came together so easily, like two halves of the Yin and Yang. Levi's arms wrapped around your body like that was the only thing he was born to do; and your face fitted perfectly at the crook of his neck and collarbones as you rested your hand on Levi's chest.
You both exhaled in relief. Levi tightened and loosened his arms around you as if he was making sure you were still here with him. You rubbed your hand on Levi's chest and neck, assuring him you never left.
You planted a small kiss on his skin, promising to stay with him for life. Levi removed your hair from your face, and you finally locked eyes.
You saw a tear rolled down his cheek, and you lifted your face and kissed his lips.
#ok its 12.39am here#i need to sleep#but ugh here is soft sad levi#levi ackerman#levi fluff#levi x reader#levi ackerman x reader#levi heichou#levi x y/n#midnight thoughts#levi x you#aot x y/n#levi ackerman x you#levi drabble#slow life with levi
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as a fellow deluyuyu looking out for another deluyuyu.. do NOT look at Yunho's Saitama Day 2 pictures 💀🧎🏻♀️🕳 we don't have the hotteok health insurance!!
bro.
YOU'RE TELLING ME WE WITNESSED THE YIPPLE???? HE ACTUALLY BROKE THE WALL DFKJGHJDFHGJKDF
AND HE LOOKED THIS HOT ANYWAY???
I. AM. NOT. OKAY.
#i seriously need to touch some grass after all the scrolling i did#but can i just say my heart is feeling things it should not feel#AND HE LOOKS SO UGH FDJKGH DFHGKJDFHDADDYSDKFJGHKJDFHG IN THE LAST PUCS#I AM NOT FINE#DELUYUYU SHOULD BE A COINED TERM ATP#HOTTEOK HEALTH INSURANCE WHAT WHO#anon thank you for informing me what i missed today#yet another day i cry myself to sleep bc i wont get to see this yunho#fist in my mouth screaming into the pillow as i type#💌#jeong yunho#yunho#ateez#yumi.asks
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SHARING SPACE — Carmen Berzatto.
synopsis: just a blurb, how you ended up moving in with Carmen :)
warnings: established relationship, reader is implied female (but little use of specific pronouns), fluffy headcanons, some smutty implications, some smutty implications but still fluff, mentions of alcohol and smoking, blurb is set once they're rebranding The Beef into The Bear.
i need more Carmen fluff this man is my whole life. btw this is super short but i'm sooooo burnt out :'(
It started with you "accidentally" falling asleep in his bed from the night before, panicking and hurrying to put your clothes in the morning before he had to rush to work. You weren't technically dating, but you were too close for comfort to be considered something as shallow as "friends with benefits." It was more than that.
But then things seemed to slow down. It turned into spending an extra ten minutes enveloped in each others arms. You shared, "good mornings" between sickly sweet kisses, his hands feeling up and down your torso while your fingers entangled in his hair. Carmen whispered about how much he didn't want to leave—as much as both of you knew he had to.
"You're gonna be late, Carmy." You'd groan, cupping his clean-shaven face and planting small kisses on his cheeks. Carmen let out a sigh of disappointment, realizing his short moment of bliss would be over the second he thought about leaving.
"I'm gonna clean up, 'kay?" He'd mumble, kissing your sweet lips one last time. His pupils dilated at the sight of you in his sheets, something he wish he didn't have to cherish from how little free time he seemed to have.
"Mhm."
Once he'd hop in the shower, you'd get yourself dressed before pouring him a warm cup of coffee, occasionally placing any dirty dishes stranded in the kitchen in the sink as an act of courtesy. You'd check the time, 7:00am,
As much as it pained you to leave without a proper goodbye, you worried that Carmen needed space- that he didn't have time to pepper kisses along your cheeks before he left.
"Bye Carmy!" You'd call out, but not quite loud enough for him to hear from the bathroom.
He wished you would've stayed just a little longer.
Eventually, you caught on. At one point, you swore you saw Carmen popping his head back into his bedroom to see if you were still there as you were already halfway out the door. From that point on, you started leaving little notes next to his coffee, littered with "I'm so proud of you," and sweet comments like, "break a leg Bear," and sometimes even an "I'll see you soon."
Then it turned into spending all weekend, every weekend, in his apartment—even though you'd been stopping by the restaurant between closing hours, and spending a good hour or two with him every other day of the week.
It just wasn't enough.
You started bringing a share-sized blanket and bottles of your favorite drinks whenever you came over, which was practically 4-5 times a week by that point.That blanket ended up rotating between your apartment and his, until it finally resided on the couch.
Wrapping himself in that blanket whenever you weren't around, reminded him that there was something else to think about; that there was someone else who needed him just as much as he did them.
You started leaving little things like your hoop earrings on the kitchen counter, or your puffer jacket on his coatrack, wondering if they'd still be there by next weekend; wondering if Carmen would ever have the heart to give them back to you. (Spoiler alert, he kept everything you ever "forgot"' in the exact same spot. Having a piece of you in his home at all times seemed to make up for your absence during the week, even if it just made him miss you more.)
Then you started packing extra clothes with you that you'd stuff into an empty drawer in Carmen's dresser. You brought your travel-sized, makeup bag with you, which you just ended up leaving in his bathroom. Along with your meds, and your skin care, and practically everything else you couldn't live without.
...
"You should just move in at this point." Carmen let out a breathy laugh as he watched you do your makeup, his eyes meeting yours in the reflection of the bathroom mirror. Not even 20 minutes ago, he saw you pick out an entire outfit from the spare clothes you brought, not even realizing that you left a pair of black shoes that went with everything, right in his shoe rack.
"I practically live here now," you paused to put on some mascara, your mouth gaping open as you tried to concentrate, "but my lease is up on the 23rd." You joked, twisting the cap on your mascara back on and tossing it into your makeup bag.
"I mean—would you want to? Live here? With—with me?" He physically turned to look at you, your reflection not giving him enough clarity. He needed to see you, whether you said yes or no. You felt your stomach turn, and the question seemed unreal.
"I— yeah, I guess. Only if you want me to, but that'd be pretty... cool." You turned your head to face him, gazing into his desperate eyes. He needed to be able to call this apartment "ours," not just "his."
This apartment felt more like a home than you than anywhere else you resided in Chicago. You made your commute to work from this apartment, you ate and showered and slept in this apartment, bits and pieces of you were tossed all around this apartment, you brought home every new piece of clothing and jewelry back to this apartment.
Carmen literally made you keep a spare key in your wallet, advising you to come over whenever you needed something—even if he wasn't home. He trusted you with his space,
He took it upon himself to buy you a toothbrush, the shampoo and conditioner you raved about after he complimented your hair, and extra pads/tampons/menstrual cups (since he wasn't sure what you used,) just for when his bathroom would be occupied by you. He cleaned out the hidden cabinet behind the mirror above the sink, making sure you had a place for all of your things. He moved all of his cologne, deodorant, lotion, etc in the cabinet underneath it.
All he ever wanted was to make sure you felt safe.
#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto fluff#ugh this blurb is so cute#this took way too long to post idk why#i'm so exhausted i just needed to write something to quench my thirst#jfc guys#i need to sleep#uni is kicking my ass#the bear#i need him biblically
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