#u made so many good points
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I believe that Solas was the brain of the rebellion, whilst Felassan was its heart. Solas was an ideologue (Anaris calls him that) who had this vision of personal freedom, he must have shared this with Felassan, who probably was taken by this idea and gathered people to their cause putting Solas as figurehead due to his power rivaling this of Evanuris. We see that it's Felassan who actually ran Dread Wolf's "PR campaign" because Solas is not a team player when he's in charge.
Felassan felt closer to the people. He could understand them better, whereas Solas, despite his best intentions was always one step higher from the start because of the mere fact of being Mythal's second from the moment he took a body.
There's this one entry "On the life in the Lighthouse" describing one of Solas's war councils, it concludes:
"Finally, a heated conversation silhouetted against glass with quick shadows darting behind it The argument ends with a wordless but unmistakable impression: "You summoned them: you feed them."
I think this is actually Solas talking to Felassan.
this is a beautiful analogy! i love the idea of solas and felassan each embodying a really specific role (beyond the original ideal solas encompassed) during the rebellion, not only because it's poetic af but i also think it puts things into perspective. it is fascinating for me to have solas be confirmed as a (once, but no longer) spirit of wisdom, but then for us in the regret-memories to watch that ideal be so completely removed from the emotional/personal application a revolution requires.
like, what is a mind without a heart? what is wisdom without a soul to carry it? what even are the archetypes of acumen/insight/foresight when the vision you're pursuing (and recruiting others to pursue) relies on the lives/wills of non-spirit, flesh & blood beings? and THEN if some ideals are inherently neutral in nature, such as wisdom (though i guess i could also argue that it's Good bc it's technically a 'virtue'), how does that affect the world around them when they are no longer just that ideal? i think the being part in all of this is key, too. solas is a lot of things, but the tragic part for me is that he could've been so much more than just the archetype of corrupted! wisdom. from what we know about spirits being corrupted into demons by others who use them inappropriately (even if it's unwillingly) cole's personal quest in dai already showed us: it is excruciating for a spirit to accept that their nature has changed and therefore requires a new kind of 'embodiment'. but, it's possible. you just cannot get there without that acceptance, and then the subsequent integration.
(but, tbh, i do like solas's character as it is because i think he's so bizarre and consistently inconsistent with his alignment.)
all of this to say!!! -> i love love love what you wrote here and i'll think some more on it. "... because solas is not a team player when he's in charge." YES! and i love that about him! bc what the shit!! i want to punch him in the face! there is so much here to consider!
#solas#felassan#veilguard#answered#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#datv#mythal#dav#evanuris#snowdropsinapril4#thx for this message like my brain is exploding and i love it#u made so many good points
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I love this so much!!! I’ve had the idea for forever that Morty and em became friends sometimes when Morty went to the citadel, cuz there have been multiple occasions of Morty mentioning going to the citadel on his own. And I live the idea that em lied abt the seat being a toilet cuz that’s definitely something he would do to uphold his reputation
(Also I’m all for shipping em and Morty it’s half the stuff I post on my blog… and it’s in my fics if you crave morty x em content lol)
here's how the freaky mortys theory can still win. (aka, what i'm calling the friendly mortys theory.)
(carrying over a lot of connections made by @trucknoisettes and @glitteringcrab)
so, its no secret that evil morty tends to play up his 'mortyness' when he needs to appear innocent. most recently seen in unmortricken, where he pretends to be morty prime and the first words out of his mouth are "aw jeez".
its also no secret that morty's been ping-ponging a bit between s1/2 personality and s5/6 personality.
i posit that the moments where he's seen acting more like the cliche morty is the moments where its actually evil morty overcompensating, and the moments where he actually acts like morty prime are, yknow, morty prime.
this would, of course, require that they be swapping places off-screen throughout season 7.
or, and this is where i get full tinfoil-hat, theyve been doing it even longer than that.
while rick was off having his anime crow arc in season 5, morty was doing... something. the show doesnt really dwell on it, except mention that morty was on the citadel at some point. its entirely possible that morty got to talking with people on the citadel, maybe even making some friends. maybe one of those friends just so happened to be the president.
evil morty didnt have a clear reason to invite our rick and morty to dinner before he destroyed the citadel. i doubt that he had a soft spot for rick c-137, but maybe, just maybe, he had a soft spot for morty prime. the morty who stood up to his rick and had been complaining about being left by him only a few days ago.
obviously morty hadn't known EM's actual plan. he probably didnt know too much about EM at all. but there's no way that EM, the character who just wants to be alone, would invite a total stranger along with him out of the cfc.
but no. morty declined.
what if the second seat wasnt a toilet. what if he had built a second seat in order to take morty with him, but lied to protect his reputation.
so imagine, our morty, morty prime is reeling from everything that happened. and as horrified as he is, maybe he also understands. just a little bit.
and evil morty, he built his base, he's finally left alone, but maybe he's also a bit lonely. after all, the robot butler also clearly was programmed for conversation.
so, maybe partway through season 6, evil morty talks to morty prime. they make up. they agree to switch places on occasion. after all, morty needs a break from all the bullshit sometimes, and EM is probably curious what morty's family, and indeed rick c-137, is actually like.
and so when evil morty comes to that base where rick and morty are, morty obviously isnt going to act like they know each other. so he overcompensates just like EM can, but in the other direction.
like, come on, can you really believe that morty prime would act like that with no provocation? he may have a violent side, but it doesnt just come out of nowhere. and yes, the blood vortex was horrifying, but clearly EM isnt here to attack either of them right now.
now, if he was, say, exaggerating his dislike of EM so rick wouldnt get suspicious, then this makes a lot more sense. morty's not really a good liar! in fact, they could even be swapped right then! this seems more like what EM would say in this situation, doesnt it?
now, while i was reading @trucknoisettes unmortricken analysis, i was wondering why morty would jump from being openly hostile to EM to agreeing to temporary mind control, but if the hostility was all an act? if he already had some precedent for trusting EM? well, a whole lotta things start making sense.
so, to summarize this wild speculation:
- evil morty and morty prime have been friends since after season 5 episode 9
- at some point in season 6, evil morty made up with morty off-screen.
- after making up, the two of them started switching places on occasion throughout season 6 and 7
- morty prime's hostility to evil morty in 7.5 was an act
and perhaps ive taken a few too many liberties, but yknow. i'm here to have fun and ship evil morty x morty not make perfect sense.
#rick and morty#rick and morty theory#freaky morty theory#morty smith#evil morty#u made so many good points#now I rlly want this version of the theory to be right lol#but like it did seem like Morty was being a little too hostile towards em#cuz even if he didn’t trust him at all Morty is still usually a rlly understanding guy#rb
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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Look, I enjoy the Targaryens as much as the next person and think that their house, their family mess, all of it is very interesting. I want a dragon so bad and they are one of the reasons, I get it. But, on the same hand, it gets annoying when people say/act like they are the only interesting house within ASOIAF (this rhetoric is mainly on Twitter, from what I've seen) and it primarily has to do with them having dragons (to which, for a time many Targaryens didn't have after the dance and until Daenerys came into the picture). Look, having dragons is cool and all, but if that's all that makes a house interesting then maybe that house is boring. And, could be just me, but by saying that I feel like it's lowkey disrespecting all the work GRRM put into the other houses and their characters. If the Targaryens are your favorite that's fine, but there's no need to act like the lore behind other houses also isn't just as important. I'm new to this fandom, but there are so many aspects that have pulled me in and it's sad that people ignore it just because it's not a part of one particular house.
#again i enjoy the targs and their messiness#and i want a dragon fr fr!#but im also not going to disrespect the other houses either! they are just as good if not great (acting like the martells didn't give them#a run for their money)#also back to the dragon thing how do you have rhae saying that without their dragons they're just like everyone else#and turn around and go “other houses aren't as cool without dragons” you're kind of proving her point#starks lannisters MARTELLS tyrells so many interesting houses that deserve praise too#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#house targaryen#hotd#targ stans pls dni if you're going to be mean#also i see some refusing to acknowledge how cool some of these houses are just bc they had beef with the targs and I'm like#come on move on already asoiaf has houses backstabbing one another left & right and moving on right after#even if you dislike one character from said house (fine) that doesn't mean you can't like anything about where they come from#yall can hate on the hightowers all you want but if you look me in the eye and say you'd pick smelly kl over oldtown i know u lying#even the wiki says that kl was hastily made and has a lot of flaws bc of that but oldtown doesn't bc they took time to build#even if i didn't rock with the hightowers like that id still pick oldtown over kl
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Fucked up how an adult can make a simple benign poor choice of words one time and give a child a complex forever
#at this one teacher#where are you now teacher#were you ever aware that ur choice gave me crippling self hate and shame for years to come#did you ever know it was even a poor choice of words and that it was bad? or did you never think o it again#like tell me#YOU NECER SPOKE TO ME ABOUT IT OR ANYTHING#would you have???? did you ever want to?!? I’ll never know#i don’t even remember what u look like it ur name but I remember sitting at the beach at 11 years old thinking about how I was#was too dirty and evil to be a woman and that I had let all women down#that I was a monster#i remember my stupid ex friend couldn’t even be ducking nice to me one ducking time about it either#i don’t remember what the class was about but I remember looking at the other girls and feeling like an ogre who didn’t deserve to be in#their presence#i know this incident was not the root of these issues and probably just a catalyst but it sticks out as easy to remember for some reason#i know you were a psychology/PSHE teacher and would end up preaching mental health to us in a lecture many years later#i wanted to take psychology for my GCSEs because I was really interested (and good at it I think)#but you were the only teacher for it so I didn’t take it#i remember at parents evening my mum and I sat opposite you and we talked about how I wanted to do psychology#but I declined and refused to tell anyone why#it was because you were the teacher and I felt ashamed#you couldn’t have known but I kind of wish you’d asked me why I changed my mind or at least something#instead you just looked at me as if you knew#but said nothing. AS IF YOU AGREED#THAT I WAS BAD.#so that settled it#you made it clear to me you meant what you said#and there was no point in me trying to fix it#so I never took psychology#i think I could have been so good at it#do YOU
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Had the extremely upsetting experience of a mutual of like 6 years going off on me for occasionally making posts about supporting Harris because apparently that makes me a g n cide denier who refuses to learn and grow, with all of my views just being assumed not even from what I've told them I believe or what I've posted before, but just because I DON'T post particularly the kind of things they THINK I should be. When I pointed out how much they were just completely assuming about stuff I'd never talked to them about, I was told it doesn't matter what I do in real life or "care" about if I simply disagree with their conclusion and vote for her anyway. Like they were absolutely not sorry for the level of maliciousness they not just assumed of my character, but for some reason thought appropriate to bring directly to me before unfollowing me. No apology whatsoever for how discomforting or upsetting that might be and certainly no acknowledgment that I could disagree with them and still be a good person. I just got another even longer rant about how they fundamentally can't fuck with me because of this one thing, no matter WHAT else I do in my real life (which I pointed out that they do not know), and how I'm directly supporting fascism.
Like seriously what is it about Tumblr that makes people think they know someone based off of occasional posts? There were just such DEEP assumptions they were making of me and going off of very little or absolutely nothing. Around the time I first became mutuals with that person I used to express my personality and beliefs and talk about what was going on in my life a lot more openly, but I've significantly scaled back on doing that in many ways for many reasons. One of my major ones is privacy and the way I've had strangers outside my followers and following circles just find random things I say and dogpile me for it. I was fundamentally changed after some T Fs did that to me like 3 years ago. I also just didn't have many conversations w that person anymore (I message people in general on here like 10x less than I did circa 2018-2019, which I'm somewhat sorry about!). My point is to say I think this person felt comfortable assuming that they knew me, especially who I am in 2024 at the age of 25, much better than they actually did.
One of the specific things they accused me of was being afraid of learning and growing (because I don't perform social media activism on here like they think I should). Like AFRAID to take criticism. When again I've never received criticism from them or had to respond to any criticism on here before as pertaining to my views on... well, absolutely any of the issues they accused me of not caring about. They essentially treated it as if the only thing in the world I cared about was the US election and characterized me as the most out-of-touch liberal they could possibly imagine, because I'm not "pushing" Kamala Harris to be better (Oh?? Should I do that on here?? Does she read my blog??).
And most hypocritically what they said was that I only *sometimes* *vaguely* post pro-Harris things (I often post like 5 or fewer things in a day though?). But here's the kicker. "Because I know I'll get shit for it. And rightfully so."
Really????? Not a single person, anon or not, in my messages or in a tagged post or anything, has ever given me shit before for saying who I'm voting for. I'm actually NOT afraid of "getting shit" for that opinion, I just don't start fights with people who are anti-voting. And why should I??? I genuinely don't believe in trying to change the minds of strangers on the internet about that sort of thing. I'm just not confrontational about it; that is so not the same thing as being "afraid of getting shit." I'm not posting ENOUGH about my support for Harris, therefore I'm afraid. But therefore they can also make all these assumptions about me being their strawman for an ignorant Harris supporter.
I'm afraid of getting shit but I still post anyway? But if I weren't afraid of getting shit I'd be posting a lot more?? This is ALL based on their assumptions of what my blog *should* look like, based on what I really and truly believe. My level of posting every now and then is an accurate gauge of my feelings on complex, sensitive, global issues. Because I'm voting for the Democratic presidential candidate and I'm ok sharing pretty much just that little glimpse of myself.
I really don't think that person knows just how inappropriate and insulting that is to just say all of that to me. Like they really know what's going on in my head. Their first message began and ended with like "I'm sorry I love you I just can't take it anymore" but they clearly weren't sorry enough to try and be more respectful to me, and they didn't love me enough not to default to extremely ungenerous assumptions and attacking me based off of those instead of any actual words I've said that they take issue with.
Online radicalization is real and it's not necessarily bad because your political views can start to fall well out of the contemporary Overton window. The way you find it appropriate to treat people whose views, however common, seem to fundamentally misalign with yours... that does matter. You can't just assume the worst of everyone and then act on that in how you approach them as individuals. And then be shocked that you don't stay friends with them. You can't be confrontational with someone about an issue you've never had an honest conversation about, and then expect them to take your bad faith in them as reasonable well-meaning criticism.
I'm afraid of criticism??? I'm afraid of criticism. No I'm not. This person and I have never had an issue before where they criticized me and I got harshly defensive. It was ALL projection. The entire tone of their messages was as if all their anti-voting posts recently were somehow in communication with the occasional go-vote-for-Harris posts that I make. That's not a conversation. I don't post for your satisfaction. I don't post in "response" to my mutuals I disagree with. I just post what's on my mind, sometimes, about some things. I really again can't stress enough how baffled I am by this
#tales from diana#long post#this is not really a post about voting this is a post about online etiquette#i also remember that this person at one point when we were teenagers had a crush on me#so they might have somewhat idealized me or maybe just had respect for the good times#good conversations we had over the years etc#i still held them in regard even though some of their anti-voting posts i took serious issue w#again i really don't care to argue w ppl against voting bc really i mainly only disagree w that one conclusion#the systemic critiques that were made in those posts i don't think make them bad ppl#i sympathize w why someone might think that way#i just cannot pretend that i think nothing changes if we have dt as president again#i can't act as if im not anxious at the state of the world we're in where we're seriously at risk of that#i don't have that same level of concern about harris. i don't. i don't think theyre the same#i think they diverge in so many meaningful ways but im usually not writing detailed long thoughtful posts about it#do i have to??? for TUMBLR?? id rather not...#but i don't wish to be confronted as if these are nuances i MUST not hold in my opinion#can't stress enough they were basically calling me a g n cide denier like that's just a cool ok thing to do#i have literally never made a post about ppl not voting for harris bc of the war in gaza#i specifically haven't not because im 'afraid' but bc i don't believe in comparing those 2 things#there was gonna be a presidential election this year anyway and there does not have to be this war#if u think dems aren't doing well enough on the war for u to vote for them. i can't argue w u#but i was always going to vote anyway#again im afraid of getting shit?? ONLY this person has EVER given me shit until now#im not pushing harris enough? how tf do u know that? bc im not reblogging ill-informed posts from ppl like u?#im not PUSHING this woman running for president enough bc im not writing critical posts she and her advisers will never see#about how im threatening to withhold my vote from them. something id never honestly do considering the opposition#they kept stressing to me to about how they weren't a trump supporter when *i* never said as much to them#i do agree that not voting for harris 'supports' trump in that it benefits him overall#but i don't attack ppl who just aren't voting in that way. ok?#damn i hate being on the defensive like this
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funniest and most unexpected thing about DTS 6 is the absolute unparalleled downbadism we all have now for james patrick vowles
#james vowles#as you all should#he’s amazing#his high performance podcast was somehow both so boring but also made so many good points#he’s just an engineering nerd and a good guy and a high achiever who wants to do well by his team#but is a little bit awkward about it and how can u not love that#the antithesis to the rbr style if you will and i love it
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they���re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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#that post thats like even when u watch a not very good horror movie its still a good time. on account of the horrors😁#anyway i had to get the body horror moments smashed together in an edit as they were [surprising nobody] my favourite parts. love and light#and ive become endeared to miles......#real shame theres not any good pics of the sfx prosthetics i wanted to see that mouth stretch one. fuckin craaaazy#love the dedication to like. quick ass shots. how many different pieces would need to be made for it to land#like the army of darkness face stretch. or pullin the tracker out the schnozz in total recall#i love u practical effects!!!!!!!!!!!! i LOVE the face meld here. [pointing at screen] yooooo anyone getting splitface thing vibes#right let me fire off some tags so this shit is coated and covered#body horror#gore#blood#flashing#..yeah? yeaah👍#miles robbins#daniel isn't real#my edit#chewtoy#also the amount of times he goes for his mouth man. i only noticed the one on the roof before the fall when i was editing this#literally fingers in his mouth friday bleaaauughh
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'Here's a 4chan post about how liberals that like Harry Potter in current year see the world.'- post engaged with on here by people on the broader left for some reason.
#people forgetting the right wing exists again and also hates liberals#but even if people on 4chan have made good points occassionally (i didnt bother reading it but its possible)#how exactly are you going to convince people not to engage with HP in any way because it empowers jkr#using fucking 4chan?!#honestly there are so many left wing people on here with the weirdest blind spot when it comes to 4chan#the memes they use...the weird way they give it a pass at times like this#if u can avoid HP on your massive muscular principles but 4chan is ok then what state are your principles in
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byan being a timid kid.
byan being a timid kid because they used to be an outgoing and energetic kid, but they'd get in trouble for being too loud and annoying, too rambunctious and distracting, and struggled to make friends because they were too overwhelming and wanted too much attention. byan being a timid kid because they don't know who to trust because they've been hurt so many times in so many ways by the people who were supposed to protect and look after them. byan being a timid kid because they always manage to disappoint everyone, because they aren't smart enough or talented enough or good enough and they can never seem to do anything right. byan being a timid kid because they're afraid of what they're capable of, because every time their anger has boiled over, they've done serious damage to people, because they've ended up hurting someone far more than that one person ever hurt them.
byan being a timid kid because they don't know what else to do, because every part of them seems wrong, and now being themself just doesn't feel like an option.
#and then of course byan flipping that on its head one day when the final straw snaps#bc being quiet and timid and trying to be well-behaved never actually made things better it never changed anything#byan embracing their anger in a very 'you think I'm a disappointment and a problem? fine I'll BE a disappointment and a problem' sort of wa#hi I've been having a lot of middle of the night thoughts again lately#tonight it's thinking about how if you compared byan at a certain point in their childhood with byan now#you'd never guess they were the same person bc they're such complete opposites#bc they spent so many years trying to be all these things they weren't and none of them were fucking good enough for anyone#if anyone needs me I'll be over here laying on the floor in self inflicted emotions over my own oc ok thank u goodnight#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don’t @ me.
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Take this as permission to ramble about an oc <3
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY CASSIE TIME
every1 look @ her outfits........ if u dont want to read th worlds longest oc lore dump u can go in #party rat, #cassie, or #boss cass and learn literally everything u need 2 know abt her frm context clues
SO THATS CASSIEEE my mgs oc ✨ aka cassandra aka cass aka party rat aka my baby
looong story short she was your classic mgs child soldier with a streak of bad luck until she tried to KILL big boss in the late 1960s. she was one of the first poor bastards he took under his wing and following the dubiously canon events of the san hieronymo incident she became one of the original members of the foxhound unit: solitary shrike.
obviously that code name sucks ASS and honestly so did she; she was moody, rude, violent and didnt work well with others. absolutely no joy or whimsy until she met some british asshole named lance hewitt, codename bengal tiger, and got paired up with him. they proceeded to survive a catastrophic near death mission that changed the trajectories of their lives FOREVER on account of they emerged from it so ride or die for each other that they began matching each others freak to an inadvisable degree.
she changed her name (surprise her given name isnt cassandra. only 3 people in the whole world know what it used to be and im not one of those people) and her code name to reflect the "new her" she wanted to cultivate after facing death, branding herself "party rat." the goal? fill whatever life she had left with as much joy, love & fun as she possibly could. she was going to sing as loud as she wanted, dance as wild as she felt like, and finally stop holding herself back from fully connecting with the people around her. to solidify this, as well as to show her complete and utter over the top devotion to him, she took on lances last name, finally becoming the cassandra hewitt we all know + love
now a member of the MSF cass works as an engineer sergeant, chief mechanic, & generally invents a bunch of highly questionable weapons and machines. she also operates on the field as a demolitions expert for her squad, which grows to include an absolute dickhead named joaquin gutierrez, or mangey jackal. though she tries to embrace her new party spirit and the "peace and love" vibes of the time, he singles out bengal for some intensive one on one training and eventually pushes him to the point of breaking, making cass snap and quite literally bite his ear off. but like. he was fine. and everyone got better. and she taught him how to do the hustle as a peace offering. nothing a little disco cant fix.
back to the Plot: she eventually gets wrapped up in the creation of metal gear zeke, and was one of the weak points exploited by paz that allowed her to hijack it later on. she meets her canonical end during the ground zeroes incident, dying alone in the lower levels after sending her squadmates ahead to buy time. she blowed up </3
in alternate timelines where she survives she loses her left arm and occasionally her leg below the knee as well. as a sole survivor she becomes tangled in a web between big boss, zero, and cipher, creating a PMC of her own in order to pick up the pieces and continue the legacy left to her. she also begins raising the clone sons of her late best friend as her own but THATS neither here nor there <- dont even worry about it if the others survive she manages to slip from the attention of the higher ups and settles on creating a relief network with amanda valenciano libre, an old friend from her time in the msf. no matter what, cass maintains a stubborn belief that unless shes seen the bodies of her friends theyre still alive, which means she cant rest until shes found them. even if it takes Nine Years
ANYWAYS LIKE. tldr: shes like if pinkie pie had a party cannon that killed people for realsies
#if anyone reads all that. well idk i guess im kissing u on the mouth#shes my life this is like barely scratching the surface#ive got her connected to so many plot points and characters#her relationship with lance and jack is insane#she just wants to have fun now ok but god keeps blowing things up in her face#good thing she likes explosives#ANYWAYSSSSSSSSS#there are multiple playlists for her its mostly kesha#i could & would go on but the nurse has arrived with my sedative#party rat#<- her main tag#the others are for the college au where shes a stupid drummer in a shitty band#and for when shes the worlds worst best boss#respectively#also i am NOOOOOOOOOOT tagging anything m/gs if it shows up in the tag i will DIEEEEEEEEEE#uhhhhhhh#hi i like her i have more picture of her.. mayb one day ill post all her outfits (college + older design) idkkkkkkkk#ps if u made it to the end of all these tags. what are u a super freak#dm me a sparkle emoji 4 getting this far & i will like send u a picture of a horse or smth idk#yay cassie :+)#asked and answered
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still so much sadness and grief that lingers, but my heart is so full of the regard and kindness of so many people who are here despite it
#★#ive known v many of you for such a short amount of time#but the small kindnesses youve shown me (and just getting the chance to peak into yalls lives !!) has made this point in my life ...#so much easier to take on#thank you to everyone whos sent good vibes my way#and thank u to everyone who follows my work#it means the world <3
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SEASON 4 FINALE.........I felt genuinely ill the whole time like my stomach was twisting I was gonna throw up oh my god what the FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#SAM MY BOY#SAMUEL MY BELOVED IM SO SORRY#THE FUCKING CON ........ THE WHOLE TIME!?!?!?! THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME!?!??!?!#u js have 2 respect her @ this point 4 that bc holy shit#2 season spanning game she was in 4 the LONG HAUL#cas defying fuckers 4 the gayass 1 million complex brothers 🎉#sam made me want 2 throw up so much#he js wanted 2 save ppl .... he didnt kno!!!! HE DIDNT KNO!!!!!!!!!!! (said thru tears)#THE FUCKING DEMOM EYES...ON HIM......IT MADE ME ILL#srry!!!!!!! sam thoughts im rlly biased#OUGH he PRAYED he had FAITH and he was MANIPULATED and TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF and REFUSED 2 SEE IT bc he WANTED 2 BELIEVE#that he culd do GOOD despite tbe fact he KNEWWW he had DEMOM BLOOD in himmmmmmm!!!!!!!!! ARRRRRRGHHHHHHHH#im having so many thoughts. abt him. but i dont thibk im articulating them v well @ all.. oh well! do u understand what i mean#anyways unreleated i thibk sam an cas shuld fuck nasty#im making galaxy brain parallels between them i js cant explain them v well. but i think gay sex wuld help (it wuldnt)#uhmmmm what else#chucks goofy i hope nthn bad happens 2 him (smth bad always happens)#MAN!!!!!!!!!!!! can these stupid ass brothers catch a BREAK!!!!!!! for ONCE!!!!!!!!!!!!#can s5 b normal (s5 won't b normal)#why the hell did i start watching spn. worst mistake of my life#ive been reminded i CAN infact get emotionally attached 2 fictional characters. thanks spn. ive got sam rotating in my mind now#i want dean 2 punch fuck outta him and then i want them 2 make up and they shuld fly 2 sum place else and have a normal life#im so DONE w this show!!!!! (im starting s5 next wk)#why the hell os this show making me feel shit bro this wasnt supposed 2 happen :(#sigh.....................oh well#spn#rivers rambles <3
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♡
#starting to believe that maybe all this while i've been punishing myself by isolating myself from people who care abt me#like there have been times when i felt that friends just didnt care. also been times i felt too ashamed to ask for help or seek company#but i think i just gotta give myself grace like . i'm human. it's fine to seek platonic connection n a listening ear. it's Normal#anw so!! i met my best friend for yoga (for the first time!) yday n we talked SO MUCH!! we talked about life careers sexuality relationshi#i also told her about smth that has been plaguing me for two days. specifically my ex ahgkhgjgjns n . talking about it really helped me#what a shocker!!!! that talking about your worries n feelings helps!!! ksggfjsnjkgnjkndg#n i learnt so many new things about her... we usually meet in a group n it's always just a roulette of quick life nuggets#but yday i realised that i never really found out what she's really been up to. i've not had a one-to-one conversation with her in ages!!#thats crazy considering that we're such good friends.... omg. n so it really made me see how much i craved that connection#n how much i'm tormenting myself by isolating myself and depriving myself of the joy that i tend to get from deep social connections :(#n i think maybe it's time to start putting that past self who was too ashamed to reach out for help behind me#idk its been really nice talking to an old friend n being 100% comfortable u know?? it made me realise how much i missed deep connections#my point is i've missed this!!!!! maybe i should do it more!!!!!#personal
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[computer is updating agonies]
Wait is the difference between masterforce Ginrai and g1 Optimus designs actually the fucking kitty ears?
[ID: Screenshots comparing Optimus and Ginrai. Aside from show style, they look like the same character. One difference is where the flat side of the helm meets the "brim". On Optimus the flat side extends above the brim, creating a triangular spike. Next to his antenna it gives him two spiky bits on either side, at different heights. On Ginrai, the flat side slopes away from the brim, and then flattens out. So only his antenna, which is itself in a flatter blade shape, sticks out.
1. G1 Optimus Prime peaking to Ironhide, the angle of his head shows of both of these spikes. 2. Masterforce Ginrai, in profile, showing off this part of his helm ends in a flat shape. END]
Like...
[ID: G1 Transformers screenshots. 1. Optimus backwards dunking a basketball. His head is at 3/4ths, one of the triangular spike shapes is visible between his arms, and has been circled in green. 2. Optimus hugging Bumblebee, seeing his head from 3/4th behind, and slightly above, makes both triangle shapes visible. In the shot they're more pronouned than the antenna. They've been circles in green and labled "Kitty cat ears" END]
[ID: Super-God Masterforce screenshots. 1. Ginrai on a tv screen. He looks bashful, one hand behind his head saying "Sorry, sorry about that. That was just a joke". The flat spaces on the helm between the antenna and middle crest have been circled in red. 2. Ginrai on his hands and knees, in front of another transformers. The flat spaces circles. A lable to one says "flat" and to the other "not kitty cat ears". Whether the shape of the red circles themselves imply the visual of floppy ears, is likely up to audience intepretation. END ID]
#some shit#its not called cisformers#'whatcha got there wifi?' uh very normal screengrabs of op and ginrai? why do you ask?#'are u tempting god with doing this in a searchable manner?' no this is a Very Serious powerpoint please stop making any faces/jjjjjj#i had to write these ids so many times to EVEN begin to phrase what i was trying to point out. and How to say it#you know. to make it a communication/clarification aid AND a useable alternative for the image itself#well im assuming some knowledge of what prime looks like. sorry. tap the sign. that kxcd edit i made.#head in hands. okay. its not putting a joke IN the id... its. the joke is me sitting here at ass clock drawing those shapes and going#'oh my god' but. i understand one might need certain predilitions to SEE that a joke could be made. so. there u go.#AND A BEAUTIFUL AND TIRED. goodnight good bye forever. o7777777
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