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angelinthefire · 2 days ago

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Okay! Let's talk about how this is objectively wrong! Step-by-step. Because it's fun!

Intro

Right from the get-go, the first sign that this guy hasn't critically evaluated what the show is trying to do: He frames the story as being about "the battle between Piltover and Zaun".

That was never the point of the show. Political inequality was always the backdrop for the story, never something that was meant to be solved.

If you look at season 1 critically instead of with rose-tinted glasses, you'd notice that there was never a fully coherent political ideology at work. This was never going to have a coherent political conclusion.

Another thing that's clear is that video guy is labouring under the impression that there is little to no continuity between the writers from season 1 and season 2.

Which is incorrect. The same creative leads are still at the head of the project. Six of the nine episodes were written by the same people as season 1. Five of them were by one or more of Alex Yee, Christian Linke, or Amanda Overton, the main creatives. Compared to only 4 episodes in season 1 being written by one or more of them.

Having more writers in the writer's room does not necessarily mean that they are all doing whatever they want. Of course different writers rooms work in different ways, but a season is broken by the writers collectively, what's going to happen is planned first, then they decide who's going to write what. There are levels of script supervision and re-writes. Often times in TV shows, a writer might have sole credit for writing an episode, but there are parts that are re-written by others.

He also claims that season 2 wasn't planned out. The idea that a show like this, with this budget, that is *animated* and therefore *needs to be story-boarded* was not planned out is wild. It's impossible for a season of high-budget animated TV to be created the way he imagines it was.

Therefore you have to approach the show with the assumption that everything there was done with a specific purpose in mind.

Let's get into the substantive points:

Point #1: characters

He starts by making the point that there are certain fundamentals about characters that cannot be changed.

It's true that there needs to be continuity in characters. But in most (though certainly not all) stories characters undergo change.

Anything about a character can change if they're pushed in just the right way, and if there's something else providing continuity. For example, a dearly held belief can change, while the character's main priority stays the same, or vice versa.

You know that the video's analysis is going in a bad direction when he starts talking about Batman as an example of good characterization.

Comic book characters have good characterization for the medium of comic books and related media. They need to remain recognizable over the course of decades, over various story lines, created by different people. Therefore they are largely static. They meet a challenge, they're knocked down, and then they overcome it by being true to themselves or their principles or whatever.

This is not the only way to do character-building and character arcs. The way a character arc functions depends on the type of story that's being told. Arcane is not a comic book story.

Arcane very clearly states its themes, repeatedly over the course of the two seasons. "A story of opposites" "two sides of the same coin" etc. Duality is a massive theme. (Another one is consequences and breaking cycles) Especially in season two - the idea that love is the source of humanity's greatest good and greatest evil is stated at least twice.

That duality is expressed in the characters, and explored by bringing them to their lowest points, by pushing them to turn into their opposite in one way or another. The first season setting up the characters so clearly means that it's interesting to see how they can be turned around.

This is very long! More under the cut.

Starting with Vi becoming an enforcer.

I already made a post about it here. But to restate. Her hatred of enforcers was a very clear belief of hers, but it was never foundational. What was foundational was her love for her family. And her sense of responsibility towards them.

In season 1 it was already shown that she was willing to throw in with the enforcers and topsiders to deal with what she thought was the greater evil, which at that time was Silco. Vi's hatered of enforcers was never going to be a permanent fixture of her character - as we know from league of legends, she was always going to end up in a uniform. The question is: what does it take to get her there?

She starts out with this very strong belief, and it is chipped away at over the course of season 1 and the start of season 2.

She meets an enforcer (Cait) who she can bond with, who sees the good in her, and who Vi can see the good in.

Vi is faced with a problem that she sees as a moral imperative to fight (Silco) and to her, the fault of the council is it's inaction against the problems of the undercity, not that it upholds a system of oppression. So she believes it's acceptable to use enforcers against Silco.

Then Vi, to her mind, loses her sister, who was really the one she was fighting for the whole time. To her, Powder is dead, but Jinx is still her responsibility. This is stated in the show. Jinx has killed people and committed an act of war.

Vi is entirely detached from her roots, she thinks everyone she knew is dead.

Caitlyn presents her with the badge. Vi refuses.

Once her initial anger dies down, she then meets some other enforcers who seem like okay sorts, and moreover, who look up to her - which again speaks to her well-established sense of responsibility. People look up to her, it's her responsibility to lead them. This lowers the ramp to entry for her.

Then, there's an attack on the memorial. It seems like something has to be done, or people will keep dying.

Moreover, Caitlyn, the only person Vi has left, is upset, and Vi tries to step into the role of helping her.

Finally, she puts on the uniform.

There is a clear step-by-step progression leading to Vi becoming an enforcer. Her sense of responsibility is set up against her hatred of enforcers, and her sense of responsibility wins out. She becomes something that seemed impossible when she was first introduced, precisely by remaining true to character.

The guy in the video shows that he is substituting his misread of Vi for the actual characterization that the show presents him with by calling Vi's relationship with Caitlyn contrived.

You can't shrug off a major relationship, which itself is a method of developing character, and still try to speak with authority on that character. Yes, Vi bonds with Caitlyn quite easily, even though she's an enforcer. Because she gets to know Cait as a person first and foremost, instead of an abstract concept.

It's worth noting that when Vi joins Caitlyn's squad, the other team members are people that Vi is at least somewhat familiar with - they're the ones who she knows as individuals. The ones that she can see as "good apples". It's not a stretch to imagine that one of the conditions of Vi joining up was that the rest of the team were people she could trust, not random enforcers.

Video guy makes the point that Vi putting on the uniform was just formalizing a situation that already existed of Vi being willing to work with enforcers. And yeah! That's exactly it! She was on the path towards becoming an enforcer, and taking that final step of putting on a uniform was always the destination of that journey.

Video guy also says he "thought the show was setting Vi up to be the next Vander".

Which a) is exactly what would happen if this was a Marvel movie. Comic-book brained take. And b) has no actual support in the story.

Vander can play the role that he does because he earned the respect of the Lanes over years of struggle. Vi just showed up after being gone for 7 years. She has no real connections left. And that's a really important part of why she does what she does.

Also: what does Vander do? He works with enforcers!

Video guy keeps saying "there's no way Vi would go along with gassing the city, there's no way Vi would be fine with Cait's behaviour." etc.

But she is doing it. And if you think for half a second, you can very easily see what's happening. Vi is out of her depth and rudderless. She's trying to orient herself by a) following through on her responsibility (kill Jinx), b) helping someone she loves (Cait), and c) providing leadership to those who look up to her (the little group of enforcers).

But not only is that not solving her problems, she's not actually playing the leadership/protector role she's so comfortable playing. She's feeling lost, she's sinking.

This is the key tension for her in the first arc of the season.

No we get to video guy dismissing the CaitVi kiss as "inappropriate" and "fanservice". Which is outright ridiculous.

The kiss is a storytelling beat like every other storytelling beat. Vi reveals how lost she's feeling. Cait comforts her. The kiss demonstrates that the characters are each on certain paths, but they haven't diverged yet, they are in fact trying not to diverge. It will take one more big event for them to part ways.

If anything, the kiss is tragic, if not foreboding.

To video guy, every character is behaving in a way that's "antithetical" to who they are.

The fact that it's every character should be an indication that the writers are doing something very deliberate here. It should also raise the question of whether his initial understanding of the characters was too simplistic. Which it was!

Point #2: so-called "lack of commitment"

Video guy claims that "so many things happen and none of them matter" which really indicates that he is confused about what the story is about. Which is strange for a show that explicitly says what it's about multiple times.

He says that season 1 was all guided by the development of hextech, everything tied into that somehow. So far, so good. He says that season 2 had no such focus. That's not true at all.

The main plot thread in season 2 is the Arcane waking up. And more broadly, chaos.

Jayce and Ekko's conversation about wild runes is an explanation of this.

Jayce does his "pass me a tome" thing, and gets a tome. Cause and effect, action and consequence.

But then, at a certain point, there is something else that comes along with the direct consequence. Ekko being frustrated with Jayce. The anomoly sucking them into other worlds. Viktor merging with the Arcane.

What's happening is: action -> consequence -> action -> consequence -> action -> consequence -> action -> CHAOS.

Some plot threads are directly tied to the Arcane, others are more abstract. The Arcane was waking up in Mel too, which is why the Black Rose came after her. Isha coming into Jinx's life is the result of the chaos she unleashed when she killed Silco. Warwick/Vander is a certain embodiment of chaos.

This chaoticness gives season 2 a different feel. One could reasonably argue that the concept of capturing chaos in a structured narrative is too ambitious, but I'm not going to argue that, and that's not the point that's being made in the video.

What you absolutely cannot argue is that there's no narrative through-line in the plot.

Video guy then lists what he calls abandoned concepts. Caitlyn becoming a dictator, Vi wanting to kill Jinx, Jayce "going crazy", Powder becoming Jinx, Mel wanting to take down Salo, Jinx becoming a hero. Which shows a very shallow understanding of the plot and characters, to the extent that you have to wonder if he was actually paying attention.

Caitlyn's arc wasn't about her becoming a dictator, it was about testing her sense of justice, which in season 1 had provided very clear guidance for her. In season 2, coloured by grief, it leads her astray.

The idea isn't "Caitlyn's a villain now! What does that mean and what does that look like?" It's about putting her in a position where she's in charge, she's the one deciding what flies and what doesn't, and getting it wrong.

Vi wanting to kill Jinx was never meant to be more than a point along the way in Vi's journey. It represented her low point.

It also represented a role reversal between her and Jinx. Another theme that the creators talked about in season 1 is "is it possible to forgive a monster?" In season 1, Jinx was the monster. In season 2, Vi takes on that role. Which gives the theme a lot more depth than had it been one-way.

Thinking that Jayce "going crazy" is worthy of an entire plot arc on its own rather than just as a side-effect of him witnessing the horrors of the alternate reality is just silly, I don't even know what to say to that.

I'll talk about what video guy thinks "becoming Jinx" (he means "be like Harley Quinn) means in a bit, but Jinx continuing to grapple with who she is and what she's capable of is one of the main elements of Arcane, why would you stop that short? Jinx either embracing becoming a villain or becoming a hero are both very flat outcomes that don't actually touch on her core trauma of destroying her family.

Video guy saying "Mel wants to take on Salo" was a dropped plot was one of the several points when I wondered what he was even watching.

Mel's efforts were never about Salo, it was always about Ambessa.

And while Mel being kidnapped by the Black Rose was sudden when looked at from the perspective of Mel's individual storyline, it was very much foreshadowed in season 1, fans were already expecting Black Rose to make an appearance. If you're not familiar with the lore, I think it was clear that whatever Ambessa was dealing with would rear it's head in Pilltover.

Most importantly, Mel's kidnapping and what she finds out in the process are a continuation of what Mel was doing, in substance. She was digging into what was going on with her mother, and then she found it. She was looking for a way to counter her mother's influence, and she found it.

Video guy claims that all the story threads are dropped for the final battle. A claim that I think is bridging the gap between media illiteracy and just straight up lack of comprehension.

The final battle is the culmination of what all the characters had been going through. It's the climax of all their key conflicts. It feels stupid and obvious to even have to go into detail on this.

Caitlyn has to confront the result of the injustice that she allowed to be carried out in her name. Mel has to confront the mother who she never felt good enough for and stand up for the city that represents her principles. Jayce has to confront the end-point of the progress he was chasing (according to the logic of the show), as does Viktor. The undercity joins the fight, but they fight on their own terms, and they would have beaten the Noxians. Jinx and Ekko embrace the idea of fighting for a new story. Vi and Jinx confront the fact that they can never return to the past, as embodied by Warwick/Vander, but also that they'll always shape each other's lives. And in the end, Jinx lets go of Vi so that they can both live freely.

The final battle doesn't override all the plot threads, it embraces them.

Video guy complaints that there was a big scene of Vi and Jinx fighting to the death and then a couple of episodes later they're "hanging out and quipping as if that never happened".

Which is really emblematic of the problem of his approach. He doesn't consider what the fight represented, how it ended and what that meant for each of them, what happened in between episodes 3 and 5, and why the sisters came together again.

He's considering plot points as absolutes in and of themselves instead of part of a bigger picture.

Again, Vi and Jinx's fight was their low point, but it was just a point in their overall journey.

Before the fight, as Jinx tells Smeech, she sees herself as a doomed individual destined to bring death to everyone.

After episode 3, she has reason to hope that she can have a family. She has Isha. She rescued people from Stillwater without blowing anyone up in the process. People have confidence in her and she feels that.

Vi, meanwhile, is just kind of ground down and direction-less. She's not in a place where she can save anyone or look after anyone. She has to engage with Jinx on her own terms, not as someone to save, not as the villain who killed her sister, but as a flawed person who is capable of love and care.

They had to hit that low point first in order to get back up. It was a kind of reset button.

The complaint is made that Caitlyn betrays Ambessa too quickly.

Again, with Caitlyn, the point of her being a dictator isn't for the audience to see her dictating around.

It's to put her in the most morally tenuous position possible. It's to take this character who had a very clear sense of righteousness, and have her stumble, have her grapple with her morality. Which we very much see her do.

I've said this in other posts, but the point of the chest pounding etc. was to push her to take Ambessa's offer. It was ominous because it was Caitlyn falling from grace.

But she was still Caitlyn, she still has a sense of right and wrong, and she knows she's doing wrong, even with the excuse of the greater good.

Seeing Vi again gives her the clarity she'd lost. Caitlyn always wanted to help people, and taking up the mantle of commander was framed as a way to protect the city, and consumed by grief and revenge as she was, she allowed herself to fall for that pitch.

But then she still needs to deal with the reality of her position. She's not happy with the police brutality that's taking place, but she lets it continue, in her name. She's conflicted the entire time.

So Vi asking her for help is an easy choice.

Moreover, the whole time, Caitlyn has seen the undercity as adversaries. Vi reminds her that's not the case, and the monster is just her dad.

Video guy said he expected Caitlyn to be like Darth Vader, and that, along with every comic or super hero movie reference, is very, very, very telling that he's just approaching the season with the entirely wrong framework. Instead of trying to understand what the writers are doing, he's trying to force the story into a Hollywood blockbuster structure, and of course he's going to be disappointed that it doesn't fit.

As the video goes on, the criticism just keeps getting lazier and more bad-faith.

Like with Ambessa, the criticism is that she goes after hextech but then stays in the city after the scientists are gone.

When the show makes clear a) she's still trying to weaponize hextech, and b) that she's been stripped of her assets in Noxus. She's staying in Piltover because it's the strongest point of support for her.

Then there's the criticism that Viktor's deathless army wouldn't be any different from the Black Rose, when there is a very clear difference - that Ambessa would control the deathless army.

Regarding Jinx, and Jinx's identity apparently being abandoned.

The comparison is made with Joker 2 (which I haven't seen), saying that in both, the main character abandons an identity that was supposed to be liberating and empowering.

Saying that about Jinx is nothing short of bonkers.

I don't know how you can watch Jinx firing on the council in s1e9 and see that as anything but an act of resignation. Jinx is accepting in that moment, but she's also defeated. She's doomed to kill the people she cares about, so okay, let's kill some people on purpose. Watch the scene.

Does she look liberated?

Does she look empowered?

He says that in season 2 he expected Jinx to no longer be "held back by Vi, Silco, or anyone else". Again, what the fuck. Silco never held Jinx back, he enabled her. What are you talking about dude?

He says he wanted her to be a Joker-like character. Again, comic-book brained. Nothing short of ridiculous. Arcane saved Jinx from being a Harley Quinn ripoff. Why would you want to see her be that?

Jinx is not chaos personified. She is a fully fleshed-out character. Moreover, she's one who is profoundly shaped by trauma and the belief that she fails and hurts the people she loves.

The writers chose to keep treating her as a deeply conflicted character, instead of flattening her. Absolutely nuts to complain about that.

The show is about breaking cycles. This is explicitly stated. Jinx's arc is about trying to find different ways out of the cycle of destruction she feels caught in - she tries killing her sister, she tries hiding, she tries rewriting the past, she tries killing herself. In the end, she saves her sister, and walks away, she gets on an airship and sets out for something entirely new. That is a very worthy arc imo.

There are just so many ways that the video guy misunderstands Jinx. The way he talks about Jinx vs. Powder continuing to be a thing in season 2, as if Jinx hasn't decided who she is and is now grappling with what that means. The way he says that the writers were trying to make her into a revolutionary hero, when they very clearly are not - Jinx explicitly rejects that. The revolution was Silco's dream, not her's. Her being seen as a hero serves two functions - it keeps the forces of Piltover focused on her, and it shows her that she's not cursed and she can do something right. It's not about her actually playing the role of a revolutionary.

I've talked about the complaint that the revolution never happened in other posts. Inequality in Arcane is the backdrop, not the plot.

Point #3: so-called "revisionism"

This is where things really start to go off-the-rails.

He compares Arcane - which has had consistent creative leadership - with the Star Wars sequels, which kept switching to different directors who didn't agree with each other.

Video guy complains about Silco and Vander knowing Vi and Powder's mom, and claims that this re-writes Vander and Silco's motivations for taking in one or both of the sisters. Which does not follow at all.

He says, "rather than realizing the devastation his violent rebellion brought to the innocent and choosing to give it up for them, all he's doing is fulfilling a promise" Like WHAT? I don't even know how you come to that conclusion.

If you rewatch the prologue, it's clear from the way that Vander and Vi look at each other that there's some recognition and familiarity there. Even not knowing their backstory, the fact that Vander and the kids' parents were on the same side, and that the Lanes seem pretty close and everyone knows eachothers business, and the fact that Vi wasn't afraid of this big guy who just beat a man to death, you can come to the conclusion that they knew each other.

Vander having promised to look after the kids changes none of the significance of his decision. He's still realizing that the rebellion killed the family of these kids, he's still renouncing violence to protect them. Literally the only thing that changed is that he knows who they are and that he's comfortable taking them under his wing, knowing that he's their closest family.

Video guy makes a similar argument regarding Silco adopting Powder, saying that instead of relating to Powder, now he's just fulfilling a promise he made. Which likewise has no logic backing to it.

Silco was fully prepared to kill all the kids, regardless of whatever promise he made. Past promises clearly meant shit to him. If anything, the possibility that Powder might have known Silco before just explains why she wasn't scared of this disfigured man with a knife looming over her. That's it.

Video guy also argues that it would be out of character for Silco, who seems to value loyalty, to try to kill the kids in the first place if he promised Felicia to look after them.

First of all, he's already someone who kills kids, breaking promises doesn't top that.

Secondly, I think loyalty is pretty clearly a mutable concept to him. He talks about loyalty, but he doesn't actually do anything to foster it. His number one guiding principle, especially at that point in time, was the ruthless pursuit of power. He only starts talking about loyalty years later when the undercity he controls and shaped turned into a dog-eat-dog kind of place.

What the flashback scene *does* actually recontextualize is Vander and Silco's relationship. Or, more precisely, it fills in the outlines that we already knew were there.

Now we come to the mage!Viktor retcon. Which video guy accuses of not making sense.

And yeah, you can CinemaSins the fuck out of it.

But does that matter?

The reveal of mage!Viktor makes emotional sense.

It allows Viktor to have gone on a journey where he sees the emptiness of perfection, and to do something to try to fix his mistakes. Which I think is really important, since it's kind of ambiguous what kind of impact the Arcane had on Viktor's state of mind. Having mage!Viktor returns some agency to him.

It also avoids needing to work another character into the narrative to resolve that bit of mystery from Jayce's past.

Most importantly, it creates a very powerful conclusion to Jayce and Viktor's story. Their shared dream ran away from from them, but the relationship they forged in pursuit of that dream saves the world, and it's the only thing that saves the world. It's fantastic stuff.

The complaint that "all Jayce is doing is enacting Viktor's will" throughout season 1 likewise does not follow and has no logical basis. Viktor saved Jayce's life and gave him the crystal. Everything else was up to Jayce.

Point #4: "missed opportunities"

One of the more annoying things about the video is that the commentator keeps talking about "good writing" as if he's speaking objectively, while revealing that the extent of his understanding of good writing is Star Wars and Batman.

While if you watch other commentators who are more well versed in actual film and story telling, they understand what the show's doing 100%. There's even a video I watched recently where some guys predicted a bunch of things that fans commonly complain about (mage!Viktor, Caitlyn's authoritarian turn, the course of Vi and Jinx's relationship), because they're actually putting thought into the characters and themes.

So to see the guy in this video talk about "good writing" is honestly kind of embarassing to watch.

One absolutely wild bit is when video guy says that Heimerdinger's problem had always been inaction, and he should have gotten back into inventing and actually helping people, but instead he did nothing and just died.

Like??? The arc you described is what happened! On screen!

Heimerdinger becomes integrated with the Firelights, and then integrated in the AU undercity, actively helping them.

He agrees to help Ekko, abandoning his caution, having learned from how he treated Jayce before.

He tells Ekko that in the time he knew him, he's truly lived - because he stopped being inactive and was using his skills to make people's lives better!

Also, he's not really dead, he's a Yordle.

I've made a post before about Sevika allegedly being left out of the story. You can read it here.

In brief, her presence on screen always depended on it being relevant to more major characters, so it doesn't make sense to expect her to have an independent arc. The fact that stuff keeps happening with her off-screen, that we can see bits of, helps the world of Arcane feel more alive.

The complaints about Warwick turned into Charlie Brown adult noises to me if I'm being honest.

It's a bunch of story ideas that have no connection to the main themes of the show. It just shows that, once again, video guy is mistaking the conflict between Zaun and Piltover, which is the backdrop for the story, for the actual plot, which is hextech/the Arcane.

But look, Warwick served a very specific purpose in the story. He brought Vi and Jinx back together, and he symbolized their past. There is no going back to that past, there's no saving it. That was the point. Whatever neat idea someone might have for Warwick, Vi and Jinx's story is primary.

All the wah-wah about Warwick is interesting though because it shows that video guy does know LoL lore. But somehow didn't know that Vi was going to become an enforcer? Or that Viktor was going to be the Machine Herald? Or that Yordles respawn?

Point #5: "useless characters"

So he complains about the existence of Loris, Maddie, and Steb, as if they're a painful imposition to endure.

When in fact they are barely on-screen, and when they are, they're entirely functional for their purpose.

They give a face to the enforcers for the big battle scenes.

They make it easier for Vi to join the enforcers in the first place by being people she can sort of trust.

Loris is someone who believably keeps Vi from dying in a ditch during her pitfighter era, but isn't someone we're sad to see her leave behind for large chunks of the plot. It's also kind of interesting that she bonds with someone who's vaguely similar to Vander.

As far as the complaints about Maddie go - the fact that she was prompting Caitlyn to call off martial law can very easily be understood as a) maintaining her cover, and b) gathering information for Ambessa on how committed Caitlyn is. Maddie was the first one to start beating her chest for dictatorship, you know she wasn't being sincere about calling it off.

The things we know about Maddie are that she is impressed by authority, and that she's kind of easy to frighten for an enforcer. Her betrayal is entirely believable.

Then the video gets into Isha slander.

Which I have very low tolerance for.

There's a great schnee video about Isha, I recommend you watch it.

But it's ridiculous to say Isha has no purpose, or worse, that she's a mere "self-insert" for the writers (!!!? insane.) when her purpose is very obvious as a foil for Jinx.

She gives Jinx the chance to experience love in an uncomplicated way.

She reminds Jinx of herself as a child, allowing her to love herself in a way she couldn't before.

Jinx very clearly develops through her relationship with Isha. She allows Jinx to see herself as someone good.

And then Jinx loses that.

Another way of looking at Isha is that she's like Powder if Powder succeeded at everything. Isha dying shows Jinx that she can't hide from the world, and that there's no recapturing the past.

It also brings her to a kind of low that she hasn't experienced before, which is explored in her hallucination of Silco.

Never before was Jinx ready to give up.

She wants to break the cycle by walking away, but at this point that means suicide. It takes Ekko to show her that she can walk away into an entirely new life.

Point #6: the "music videos"

At this point, I think video guy is just being disingenuous. Every musical segment serves a purpose. Oftentimes, it fills in a time skip, creating a certain mood and giving a sense of a wider context than they would have been able to otherwise.

Point #7: "wasted time"

The claim is made that the Salo subplot in act 1 goes nowhere and is a waste of time.

That's not true. Strictly plot-wise, Mel's spying on Salo is what leads her to Amara, which allows the Black Rose to hitch on to Elora, and kidnap Mel.

More broadly, it's part of Ambessa's whole scheme. She uses Salo as long as he's useful. She would not have been able to manipulate Caitlyn the same way. Ambessa's use of Salo gives her the opportunity to kind of ambush Caitlyn with her proposal.

This is so obvious it feels silly.

What is Caitlyn connecting while Jinx is in hiding? If you were paying attention to the music video, you'd see that there's a lot of stuff going on with Jinx's supporters. Again, obvious.

What's the point of the scene with Mel and fake Kino?

Wild thing to say. There is so much exposition there.

It also shows what Mel is actually like with Kino, it offers a window into their relationship. Whether he was real or not, Mel's emotions were real.

Her exile and her brother's death are both really important plot points, but the scene with fake Kino gives them much more emotional weight.

And saying the Black Rose didn't contribute to the main plot? A) it contributes to Mel's plot and sets her up for a spinoff. B) it's another expression of the arcane waking up.

But the most jaw-droppingly crazy thing to say is that episode 7 was pointless.

I'm going to recommend another schnee video on this, it's really good.

But you don't need to watch an in-depth analysis to understand the importance of episode 7.

Pacing wise, it's both a bit of a breather, and contributes to building tension by making you wait to see what happens next.

It's incredibly important to Ekko as a character, showing him that there's potential in the undercity and that the solution is not to go off and build a little anarchist commune on the sidelines.

It also results in his signature time power.

And it's also a really necessary elaboration on the themes of the show. On forgiveness. On the many-sidedness of humanity, showing different sides of characters in ways that they don't exist in the main universe.

It shows the potential that exists within Jinx, which is pivotal for Ekko to be able to connect with her and convince her to fight.

Video guy says that Ekko's challenges in episode 7 were entirely external. Which again shows that he wasn't paying attention. Ekko explicitly says what he learned from the experience on the rooftop with Powder. Absolutely nuts.

In conclusion

Video guy says that the season was meaningless. I think what that shows is that he was looking for a specific meaning based on his experiences with pop culture, and when season 2 did not fit that mold, he was confused.

The thing with art is that you do need to think about it. And if you approach season 2 as a piece of art with something to say, that was deliberately crafted with care, and deserving of engagement and serious thought, then it becomes very clear what the show is doing. But you need to approach it on its own terms.

Are there flaws in season 2? Sure. More than in season 1? Probably. But what flaws exist are minor compared to the thematically and conceptually rich story that we got.

If you don't like season 2, okay whatever. All that I ask is that you don't mask your subjective disappointment with claims that are objectively false.

I did enjoy writing this reply, because I enjoy thinking about Arcane, and I think this endeavor did help me understand the show better than I did before. That's one of the great things about it, the more you return to it, the more rewarding it is.

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If you feel dissatisfied from season 2 but can’t put your finger on it, I would recommend this video.

#arcane #arcane season 2 #arcane critical #vi arcane #Jinx arcane #Caitlyn kiramman #Mel medarda #Isha #ekko #silco #Vander #arcane thoughts #this was fun

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sing-me-under · 1 year ago

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Bruce Wayne is more important than Batman.

I feel like this should be more obvious, but no, it’s Batman. Bruce Wayne is the one who can genuinely change the system, who is able to provide and aid the people of Gotham. He is old money. As much as I despise capitalism and the power of the 1%, Bruce Wayne has the ability to change people’s lives on a systematic level. He is rich and influential but most of all, kind. He can fund charities, establish nonprofits, create jobs, better the prison system/mental asylum, etc etc etc. Yes, Gotham is probably genuinely cursed to always suck, but that doesn’t mean any efforts to help do nothing at all. Just some relief, another chance, a little bit of hope, is still better than being abandoned.

Empathy is supposed to be Bruce’s key personality trait. It’s why an old money socialite who has never wanted for anything (other than his parents) is able to look at Gotham and think “I want to help them”. It’s the whole point of his existence: someone with plenty of resources to help people actually does instead of sitting around, hoarding their wealth, and being condescending. And the whole “dead parents” thing motivated him to help people more directly beyond just writing checks and make speeches. Batman is the method that helps where the system has failed. He stops crimes (organized, petty, terrorism) that corrupted law enforcement ignore, perpetuate, or simply aren’t capable of handling.

Then there’s the whole “judge, jury, executioner” shit and the running theme of empathetic villains whose methods are terrible but their motivations stem from a flawed system. There are so many eco-terrorists, so many “teachers” and scientists, so many victims of circumstances who lashed out at a world that hurt them just as much. The exact degree of maliciousness varies from rogue to rogue, but none of them are innately evil (cue the criticism of the vilification of the mentally ill and minorities). The best Batman is the one who is empathetic to his rogues, who calls them by their actual names instead of their monikers, who is willing to agree to their demands within reason, who cares about their well-being and treatment once they got beat to shit for their acts of terrorism and probably murder. The best vigilantes in Gotham punch a guy in the face then offer them a chance to turn their life around. They would stop a robbery, but they’d look away when someone swipes food from a grocery store. Any hero could sit beside a scared kid and cheer them up, but a Gotham vigilante needs to be kind to the adults too (it’s why I think the WFA kidnapper trio is so funny, like they’re clearly not evil or malicious, but they are committing potentially violent crimes). Say what you will about the flaws in Batman’s principles, but you can’t deny that redeemed rogues are capable of so much good.

(As far as I know, the Joker is the only exception to this, and he doesn’t even have a backstory like at all. I actually blame the current state of Batman on the popularity of the Joker because the Joker is essentially pure evil and his very existence undermines the messages of the other rogues. But he’s more popular and produces more sales and honestly isn’t it just the funniest thing ever that DC pushes most for a villain that preaches about the flaws in human goodness? Isn’t it fucking hilarious that they’re blaming individual people for their problems (one bad day) rather than societal injustice??)

Yet for some reason, Batman is often written as if his entire mission revolves around the one moment where his parents died. “No more victims,” he says, then proceeds to brutalize anyone who remotely disagrees with his methods. He doesn’t discriminate between victims, except he’s not fixing or preventing anything. He’s just punching people one by one, and they’re not a victim if he’s the one punching them. It’s as though he believes the only way to victimize someone is by physically harming them. Without “Bruce Wayne,” Batman never interacts with those in power who are the root of the problems. As such, it ends with a Batman who only beats up people who are just trying to survive in the hellscape that is Gotham, so really he’s even worse than cops at the point. It’s why the current “edgy” Batman’s “no kill rule” is so stupid because his mission is entirely egocentric, a projection that lacks any nuance, and blames the symptoms, not the cause.

Stopping crime is police shit. Helping people is heroism. The former is dictated by the legal system. The latter is intention. You can help people by stopping crime, but stopping crime without helping people is just being hostile.

#personal #batman #dc #I have OPINIONS #modern Batman probably doesn’t vote #I like to think that the whole point of Arkham is not #locking away the crazies #but rehabilitating and resocializing #I think Arkham Asylum represents an ideal that keeps failing because the system is actively hostile to its inhabitants #in an ideal world #horrors like these exist because people believe in goodwill even when the reality is otherwise #Jason is both a Narrative and Moral foil to Bruce #i could go on another rant about that #there is no one size fits all method for preventing crime #I think it’s important that both Red Hood and Batman exist side by side #two different methods to handle two separate problems #two different people with very different priorities #because doing bad things don’t not necessitate being a bad person #that’s what Batman is for #helping supporting and encouraging the right to a happy life #but sometimes people are just terrible because they are no matter #and that’s what Red Hood is for #stopping the truly irredeemable who would waste and stomp on goodwill #it’s just a personality thing tbh #nurturer vs protector #both are avengers but that should not be their core trait #I’ve got more thoughts on this #but I’ve decided that this is enough words at 3AM

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the-busy-ghost · 7 months ago

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There are many reasons my interests are more geared towards mediaeval Scotland than mediaeval England, but at least one of them has to be the fact that I am completely incapable of Being Normal about the Lion in Winter and Shakespeare's second tetralogy.

#Like I simply could not remain unbiased #Not in a 'taking sides' kind of way but more in a 'the real Henry II did not entirely resemble this fictional adaptation'#I refuse to accept it and I don't really want to #I could try very hard to research and write about Henry II sensibly- and I often do when he (or Hotspur later on) impinge on Scottish histo #But fundamentally my image of Henry II is the image of the character from the Lion in Winter #It's horrible to have to admit I'm like one of those unhinged Braveheart or Philippa Gregory people but for twelfth century England #Although with all due respect the Lion in Winter and Henry IV Part 1 are obviously twenty times better than Braveheart #There are other reasons #I kind of feel England has enough people interested in it already #I like to dip in occasionally and it's interesting to read about (and often necessary from a Scottish perspective)#But yeah for many reasons mediaeval England- though fascinating- is not my number one priority #One of the pretty big reasons is though my unfortunate fan behaviour the minute Richard II sits himself down on the ground #To tell sad stories of the death of kings #And you know what that's valid and probably acts as a useful research tool for many people #Just not for me #It's weird though because other than Shakespeare and the Lion in Winter there aren't many period dramas I particularly care for #Not only am I incredibly picky about my historical media when it comes to the Middle Ages (less so for the 20th century)#But I never really understood why people assume when you say 'I like history' you mean 'I like period dramas'#To me these are two separate unrelated activities/hobbies #Not necessarily better than each other just different

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andromeda3116 · 2 years ago

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you know i wonder where the essay is, i certainly don't have it prepared, what it reflects about society, that the '99 trigun was a fun action western-sci-fi anime with a plot that wove itself out slowly and had plenty of heart that got serious eventually but was also a quirky romp through most of its run

and the '23 trigun stampede is a dystopian sci-fi set in a crumbling desert that can barely support life with a dark plot that drags you under immediately and also does have a lot of heart but ultimately appears to have the theme of scavenging that heart from a place that gives you no reason to believe it exists

like, as time capsules i feel like it's unintentionally saying something about us, about where we've come to and come from, that the same basic story is told in two such wildly different ways, after less than a quarter-century

#trigun #trigun stampede #i know that this is reductive but the tone of the two is just so *insanely* different that it's shocking #like the new version is gorgeous and i'm really liking it but you cannot view it from the lens of the og anime #they are essentially two entirely different anime #and yes i recognize that anime from japan is not tapped into the american zeitgeist but we live in such a globalized society now #that things seep through and things like the economy and constant streams of bad news and global wars affect all of us #do i think that it has something to do with the former american president specifically? of course not.#do i think that maybe it could reflect the growing global tide of fascism and authoritarianism and the helplessness that #many of the below-40 generation feel almost as a matter of course? perhaps.#that's something that absolutely is unfortunately transcending borders and cultures in a way that would take three sociologists #and a bar's worth of wine to describe #the same disease and sense of being abandoned or even betrayed by the people who were supposed to save you #and the deep desperate human urge to scrape together all our stupid little fragments of stupid little hope to keep us going #i haven't finished it yet so i can't say where it's taking this setting #but i find it very interesting how the two versions are so wildly divergent in tone and priorities

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a-walking-fandom-reference · 2 years ago

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i hate when people act like you are really only learning a language if you can speak it or as soon as they hear you are learning a language they ask you to say something…

#that shouldn’t be the basis for language in general considering everyone is different #but like i have a hard time with pronunciation and forming sentences when speaking in my first language #and for me being able to read the language i’m learning is the most important to me because i spend a lot of time reading things #and being able to understand when hearing it is also important for me but writing and speaking are less priority for me because #those are much more challenging for me and will not happen without the first two #idk it just it’s something that annoys me #being autistic and adhd and having learning disorders makes learning other languages very difficult for me and don’t like pressures from #others that i’m not doing good ESPECIALLY when those people haven’t learned another language #aka my parents piss me off #rey actually speaks

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asgardian--angels · 2 months ago

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Planet's Fucked: What Can You Do To Help? (Long Post)

Since nobody is talking about the existential threat to the climate and the environment a second Trump term/Republican government control will cause, which to me supersedes literally every other issue, I wanted to just say my two cents, and some things you can do to help. I am a conservation biologist, whose field was hit substantially by the first Trump presidency. I study wild bees, birds, and plants.

In case anyone forgot what he did last time, he gagged scientists' ability to talk about climate change, he tried zeroing budgets for agencies like the NOAA, he attempted to gut protections in the Endangered Species Act (mainly by redefining 'take' in a way that would allow corporations to destroy habitat of imperiled species with no ramifications), he tried to do the same for the Migratory Bird Treaty Act (the law that offers official protection for native non-game birds), he sought to expand oil and coal extraction from federal protected lands, he shrunk the size of multiple national preserves, HE PULLED US OUT OF THE PARIS CLIMATE AGREEMENT, and more.

We are at a crucial tipping point in being able to slow the pace of climate change, where we decide what emissions scenario we will operate at, with existential consequences for both the environment and people. We are also in the middle of the Sixth Mass Extinction, with the rate of species extinctions far surpassing background rates due completely to human actions. What we do now will determine the fate of the environment for hundreds or thousands of years - from our ability to grow key food crops (goodbye corn belt! I hated you anyway but), to the pressure on coastal communities that will face the brunt of sea level rise and intensifying extreme weather events, to desertification, ocean acidification, wildfires, melting permafrost (yay, outbreaks of deadly frozen viruses!), and a breaking down of ecosystems and ecosystem services due to continued habitat loss and species declines, especially insect declines. The fact that the environment is clearly a low priority issue despite the very real existential threat to so many people, is beyond my ability to understand. I do partly blame the public education system for offering no mandatory environmental science curriculum or any at all in most places. What it means is that it will take the support of everyone who does care to make any amount of difference in this steeply uphill battle.

There are not enough environmental scientists to solve these issues, not if public support is not on our side and the majority of the general public is either uninformed or actively hostile towards climate science (or any conservation science).

So what can you, my fellow Americans, do to help mitigate and minimize the inevitable damage that lay ahead?

I'm not going to tell you to recycle more or take shorter showers. I'll be honest, that stuff is a drop in the bucket. What does matter on the individual level is restoring and protecting habitat, reducing threats to at-risk species, reducing pesticide use, improving agricultural practices, and pushing for policy changes. Restoring CONNECTIVITY to our landscape - corridors of contiguous habitat - will make all the difference for wildlife to be able to survive a changing climate and continued human population expansion.

**Caveat that I work in the northeast with pollinators and birds so I cannot provide specific organizations for some topics, including climate change focused NGOs. Scientists on tumblr who specialize in other fields, please add your own recommended resources. **

We need two things: FUNDING and MANPOWER.

You may surprised to find that an insane amount of conservation work is carried out by volunteers. We don't ever have the funds to pay most of the people who want to help. If you really really care, consider going into a conservation-related field as a career. It's rewarding, passionate work.

At the national level, please support:

The Nature Conservancy

Xerces Society for Invertebrate Conservation

Cornell Lab of Ornithology (including eBird)

National Audubon Society

Federal Duck Stamps (you don't need to be a hunter to buy one!)

These first four work to acquire and restore critical habitat, change environmental policy, and educate the public. There is almost certainly a Nature Conservancy-owned property within driving distance of you. Xerces plays a very large role in pollinator conservation, including sustainable agriculture, native bee monitoring programs, and the Bee City/Bee Campus USA programs. The Lab of O is one of the world's leaders in bird research and conservation. Audubon focuses on bird conservation. You can get annual memberships to these organizations and receive cool swag and/or a subscription to their publications which are well worth it. You can also volunteer your time; we need thousands of volunteers to do everything from conducting wildlife surveys, invasive species removal, providing outreach programming, managing habitat/clearing trails, planting trees, you name it. Federal Duck Stamps are the major revenue for wetland conservation; hunters need to buy them to hunt waterfowl but anyone can get them to collect!

THERE ARE DEFINITELY MORE, but these are a start.

Additionally, any federal or local organizations that seek to provide support and relief to those affected by hurricanes, sea level rise, any form of coastal climate change...

At the regional level:

These are a list of topics that affect major regions of the United States. Since I do not work in most of these areas I don't feel confident recommending specific organizations, but please seek resources relating to these as they are likely major conservation issues near you.

PRAIRIE CONSERVATION & PRAIRIE POTHOLE WETLANDS

DRYING OF THE COLORADO RIVER (good overview video linked)

PROTECTION OF ESTUARIES AND SALTMARSH, ESPECIALLY IN THE DELAWARE BAY AND LONG ISLAND (and mangroves further south, everglades etc; this includes restoring LIVING SHORELINES instead of concrete storm walls; also check out the likely-soon extinction of saltmarsh sparrows)

UNDAMMING MAJOR RIVERS (not just the Colorado; restoring salmon runs, restoring historic floodplains)

NATIVE POLLINATOR DECLINES (NOT honeybees. for fuck's sake. honeybees are non-native domesticated animals. don't you DARE get honeybee hives to 'save the bees')

WILDLIFE ALONG THE SOUTHERN BORDER (support the Mission Butterfly Center!)

INVASIVE PLANT AND ANIMAL SPECIES (this is everywhere but the specifics will differ regionally, dear lord please help Hawaii)

LOSS OF WETLANDS NATIONWIDE (some states have lost over 90% of their wetlands, I'm looking at you California, Ohio, Illinois)

INDUSTRIAL AGRICULTURE, esp in the CORN BELT and CALIFORNIA - this is an issue much bigger than each of us, but we can work incrementally to promote sustainable practices and create habitat in farmland-dominated areas. Support small, local farms, especially those that use soil regenerative practices, no-till agriculture, no pesticides/Integrated Pest Management/no neonicotinoids/at least non-persistent pesticides. We need more farmers enrolling in NRCS programs to put farmland in temporary or permanent wetland easements, or to rent the land for a 30-year solar farm cycle. We've lost over 99% of our prairies to corn and soybeans. Let's not make it 100%.

INDIGENOUS LAND-BACK EFFORTS/INDIGENOUS LAND MANAGEMENT/TEK (adding this because there have been increasing efforts not just for reparations but to also allow indigenous communities to steward and manage lands either fully independently or alongside western science, and it would have great benefits for both people and the land; I know others on here could speak much more on this. Please platform indigenous voices)

HARMFUL ALGAL BLOOMS (get your neighbors to stop dumping fertilizers on their lawn next to lakes, reduce agricultural runoff)

OCEAN PLASTIC (it's not straws, it's mostly commercial fishing line/trawling equipment and microplastics)

A lot of these are interconnected. And of course not a complete list.

At the state and local level:

You probably have the most power to make change at the local level!

Support or volunteer at your local nature centers, local/state land conservancy non-profits (find out who owns&manages the preserves you like to hike at!), state fish & game dept/non-game program, local Audubon chapters (they do a LOT). Participate in a Christmas Bird Count!

Join local garden clubs, which install and maintain town plantings - encourage them to use NATIVE plants. Join a community garden!

Get your college campus or city/town certified in the Bee Campus USA/Bee City USA programs from the Xerces Society

Check out your state's official plant nursery, forest society, natural heritage program, anything that you could become a member of, get plants from, or volunteer at.

Volunteer to be part of your town's conservation commission, which makes decisions about land management and funding

Attend classes or volunteer with your land grant university's cooperative extension (including master gardener programs)

Literally any volunteer effort aimed at improving the local environment, whether that's picking up litter, pulling invasive plants, installing a local garden, planting trees in a city park, ANYTHING. make a positive change in your own sphere. learn the local issues affecting your nearby ecosystems. I guarantee some lake or river nearby is polluted

MAKE HABITAT IN YOUR COMMUNITY. Biggest thing you can do. Use plants native to your area in your yard or garden. Ditch your lawn. Don't use pesticides (including mosquito spraying, tick spraying, Roundup, etc). Don't use fertilizers that will run off into drinking water. Leave the leaves in your yard. Get your school/college to plant native gardens. Plant native trees (most trees planted in yards are not native). Remove invasive plants in your yard.

On this last point, HERE ARE EASY ONLINE RESOURCES TO FIND NATIVE PLANTS and LEARN ABOUT NATIVE GARDENING:

Xerces Society Pollinator Conservation Resource Center

Pollinator Pathway

Audubon Native Plant Finder

Homegrown National Park (and Doug Tallamy's other books)

National Wildlife Federation Native Plant Finder (clunky but somewhat helpful)

Heather Holm (for prairie/midwest/northeast)

MonarchGard w/ Benjamin Vogt (for prairie/midwest)

Native Plant Trust (northeast & mid-atlantic)

Grow Native Massachusetts (northeast)

Habitat Gardening in Central New York (northeast)

There are many more - I'm not familiar with resources for western states. Print books are your biggest friend. Happy to provide a list of those.

Lastly, you can help scientists monitor species using citizen science. Contribute to iNaturalist, eBird, Bumblebee Watch, or any number of more geographically or taxonomically targeted programs (for instance, our state has a butterfly census carried out by citizen volunteers).

In short? Get curious, get educated, get involved. Notice your local nature, find out how it's threatened, and find out who's working to protect it that you can help with. The health of the planet, including our resilience to climate change, is determined by small local efforts to maintain and restore habitat. That is how we survive this. When government funding won't come, when we're beat back at every turn trying to get policy changed, it comes down to each individual person creating a safe refuge for nature.

Thanks for reading this far. Please feel free to add your own credible resources and organizations.

#us election #climate change #united states election #resources #native plants #this took 3 hours to write so maybe don't let it flop? i know i write long posts. i know i follow scientists on here #that study birds and corals and other creatures #i realize i did not link sources/resources for everything. i encourage those more qualified to add things on. i need to go to work

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cilantroodon · 1 year ago

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[ID: Four gifs of Jamie from Ted Lasso in black and white with text over them. The first two are Jamie having his cheek pinched by his mom, and him grabbing Roy's face, with the text "How much of my mother has my mother left in me? / How much of my love will be insane to some degree?" The second two are of his dad shadowboxing up to him before punching him, and Jamie shadowboxing Roy in Amsterdam, with the text "How much of my father am I destined to become? / Will it wash out in the water or is it always in the blood?" End ID.]

“could I change it if i wanted? can i rise above the flood?”

#oh wow okay #I remember when his mom grabbed his face at first and I thought. oh that's why he's the way he is #I'm used to characters with trauma from one parent having a neutral or fine connection with the other parent in tv #but the sort of childlike dependency jamie has on his mother and anyone else he can get to fill that role is clinging and clinging aaaaaaaa #it keeps him from having normal friendships and relationships because he's always trying to earn his way to being mothered #he just really really wants to be a top priority for someone unconditionally and his dad will never give him that and ted is his boss #and roy makes him jump through hoops and keeley is on a different plane of life and he wants to be cool around the team #so he doesn't get that Special Boy status away from home and he's mocked for wanting it... it's a running gag even from ted which is fair #but it's very real that his abandonment issues make him think he has to be perfect to be enough and any acknowledgement that he isn't #infallible will feel like rejection to him #do I... relate to jamie? kms #okay and the other two scenes being compared...#when jamie's dad is winding up on him so to speak he smiles but when he gets close he looks down and the smile breaks. he means the hit #when jamie shadowboxes roy first of all he obviously doesn't hit him #but also he's looking at his hands self consciously so he doesn't come too close and when he throws the fake punch he looks roy in the eye #he smiles because it's a joke and you can see him check in the moment between looking up and swinging #that he's sure roy isn't moving away and knows it's a joke #because jamie could hit him lightly it wouldn't be a big deal and the whole team roughhouse #but jamie (who has been hit) is more serious with how he interacts physically #honestly all the characters' relationship to touch and how they communicate with it is really highlighted by the show #it's been fascinating. I think you could analyze every character arc just by looking at how people touch and react to touch in this show #don't even get me started on rebecca and keeley in that regard or I'll have to make a separate post (read: I might anyway but I'd need gifs #ted lasso

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sera-wasnever · 10 months ago

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There's that post going round about how calling discourse "online" to say it isn't real is wrong because those are real people saying those things which is true! It's too easy forget online that the other people involved are real people with real experiences, opinions, and feelings to hurt. But that's the point.

I don't agree that that's always what calling things "overly online" means, not fully. The discourses that get dismissed like that exist in the types of communities fostered by social media with all the lack of nuance, drive for attention, and detachment from consequence that entails. Specifically in the case of queer discourse (since we aren't usually born into these communities but pop up everywhere) it's often influenced by people in specific situations where they don't know many, if ANY other queer ppl irl. The discussions that spring up in these groups can be disconnected from how people interact irl where you are immediately faced with others' humanity. Isolation means you cannot help but see experiences other than your own as theoretical. So yes, some discourses can pretty fairly be characterised as "online" and "not real", despite those individuals obviously being real people. They're behaving and arguing in ways that are encouraged by the online space where things feel less 'real' and where the discourse is uninterrupted and all-consuming.

#thinking of my friend's ex-bf who spent too much time on trans 4chan boards and said some wild shit #but also MANY young ppl I've seen find irl community for the first time and how priorities and things you take seriously change #lots of people will treat online and in person as two different realities with different sets of opinions they'll give for each too #one is the forum of words and ideas where you try and be the Most Correct #and the other is where you have to actually act and meet unexpected things #ghost.post #one's not always better than the other but they can be very different

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irrealisms · 2 months ago

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everyone in mcyt fandom talks about bad inventories but i feel like we don't talk enough about the different types of bad inventory & the ways that inventories can be characterizing. i took most of these screenshots but one or two of them aren't by me and i've just had them saved for a few months sorry. i'm taking inventories from various people across various servers (wild life, dream smp, hermitcraft, lifesteal, and 2b2t) to illustrate my point here

like there are inventories that are bad because they're empty:

but then there's also inventories that are bad because they're full:

and, like-- the different ways an inventory can be bad are also characterizing? an inventory can be bad because the items aren't stacked; or because it's empty of anything useful; or because it's so full of building/fight supplies that there's no slots left for doing anything else; or because it's full of random junk. it speaks to a character's position (compare tubbo's diamond sword and empty inventory to ranboo's netherite sword or zam's full inventory of potions) and the rules of the server they're on (tubbo's not wearing elytra because elytra aren't allowed on the dsmp; zam's inventory has chorus fruit and wind charges but no ender pearls because ender pearls aren't allowed this season on lifesteal) and what their priorities are (building, pvp, lore) and how organized vs scattered they are and so much more. another inventory i like:

like!!! that's so instantly characterizing, for both the character and the server!!!! 5 stacks of end crystals + obsidian. 6 stacks of tnt. 3 stacks of god apples and a stack of chorus fruit as your only food. the bucket of lava and bucket of water for lavacasting. the fact that the flint and steel is enchanted with unbreaking. that's a STORY--of the character but also of the server! this is not the sort of inventory you have on most servers! it's so focused around griefing--explosions, lavacasts--and pvp, and the stacks of god apples as primary food source are an instant warning sign for widespread duping. the chorus fruit not for fights--ender pearls are strictly better, and he's got some so he clearly has access to them--which means it's for escaping traps, which means that's a live concern. it's got a lot of pvp supplies but it's so wildly different from the lifesteal inventory in ways that speak to the differences in server rules and cultures. like, horrendous inventory in many ways. also, very good inventory in some ways. also also, delightful inventory! fascinating inventory!!! inventories are such a delightful source of instant characterization i love them so so much

#mcyt #therapists dni #any british ants in the chat?#the lifesteal inventory is a screenshot from today's zam stream #but my /favorite/ lifesteal inventory screenshot is actually one from s4.#however the reasons it's my favorite are a bit of a tangent and i just wanted a reasonably representative Lifesteal Inventory #which is to say 'full of potions'#also debated doing a s5 screenshot from back when carrying ludicrous amounts of xp was the meta #n e ways . point is . I LOVE MINECRAFT STORYTELLING

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an-ruraiocht · 4 months ago

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90% of the time when i see reviews and posts saying "this book needed editing" i don't think the reader have any idea what editing actually entails. usually this is actually code for one of several "problems" with the book:

it's too long, or it's slower paced than this reader's preference. they believe "editing" would mean making it shorter

it has a heavily descriptive style, which the reader doesn't like. they believe "editing" means paring every sentence down to hemingway-style prose with no adverbs

it doesn't follow the very rigid "save the cat" style 3-act story structure, disrupting the reader's sense of narrative tension. an editor, they believe, would've made sure it did

there were a few typos or formatting errors, and they believe it's the editor's job to catch these (it's not, it's typically the proofreader and the typesetter who have responsibility for that kind of thing)

and finally, most often:

the author had different narrative priorities than the reader, who thinks an editor would have made the author change their priorities.

the thing is, there are actually issues with editors in trad publishing being overworked to the point where things aren't getting the thorough, thoughtful editing that they need to be the best version of themselves. there are plenty of badly-structured, poorly-researched, and clumsily written books out there. moreover copyediting is typically freelance and perhaps because of that, this is the area where i see the largest number of issues: continuity issues, grammar issues, factual errors etc that someone should've spotted and didn't.

but this is not typically what people's "this needed an editor" reviews are focusing on. most often it just means they didn't like the book and they've decided editing is an all-powerful force that would have transformed it into a book they liked. but that's not how it works. and disproportionately what this comment means is that the book doesn't match what current fashions have decided is The Correct Style to write in

"this book needed an editor" if it's traditionally published, it had one. like. by definition. it was an editor who bought the book. that doesn't mean the editor did a great job but they definitely existed. there were probably at least two (acquiring editor who does the dev edits; copyeditor who does copyedits), and the proofreader, and a bunch of other people besides.

also i think people think editors are the ones who like. implement the changes. but they don't. they give comments and recommendations and ask questions and the author is the one to act on them. the editor will not rewrite the book. they will not fix the problems themselves, they will highlight the problem and the author will figure out a fix for it, or they will decide they don't agree that it's a problem and leave it as it. and a lot of the sentence-level style stuff is entirely on the author so if they don't have an ear for the rhythm then nobody's going to fix that for them. editors do a lot less than people seem to imagine they do, tbh

anyway

for reference—

structural/developmental edits: is this chapter in the right place and does the plot make sense and is the characterisation consistent and effective

line edits: is this sentence in the right place and is it as stylish as it could be

copy edits: is this sentence grammatically correct and consistent/factually correct within the story/its world and do the spellings follow the publisher's stylesheet

proofreading: are there any typos in this sentence and was the formatting preserved correctly when it was typeset

#leabhair

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skyahri · 9 months ago

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How They'd Do You |Naruto Men X Reader| HC

Characters: Sasuke Uchiha, Kakashi Hatake, Shikamaru Nara, Madara Uchiha, and Naruto Uzumaki.

Summary: How they are in bed.

Warnings: NSFW. Mentions of sex and foreplay. Breeding kink, breast and nipple play, head, etc.

Masterlist Ko-fi

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Sasuke Uchiha

Sasuke isn't one to give up control very easily, especially when he's in any sort of vulnerable state.

More often than not, he's on top of you, forcing your legs against your chest and not holding anything back as he thrusts into you.

On the rare occasion he allows you to top, he's still 100% in control. He always ends up taking over towards the end when he can't take it anymore. His release is close, and something in his brain is begging him to rail you.

He wouldn't be into actual choking in fear he'd lose control of his strength, but he's not afraid to use your neck as a handle of sorts to keep your body from moving too much.

Hes the embodiment of a breeding kink.

He's close to his end. He places his hand on your stomach and forces his seed in you.

If he's still got stamina, he's pushing you onto your hands and knees for round two, ass high up in the air.

"Not a single drop spills. Got it?"

Emergency contraceptive is your best friend, but let's be real. It fails sooner rather than later based on the sheer amount you rely on it.

Kakashi Hatake

Foreplay king. He loves head, both giving and receiving, sometimes even at the same time. Nipple play, fingering, whatever it is you're needing, he's providing.

Passionate.

When he does share his mind, it's never a light matter, and sex is no different.

Kissing, hand holding, praising - it's all a very important part of the act for him. He's pouring his heart and soul into you every time you're together.

But don't get it wrong, he's still a man. Those sweet nothings and soft whispers about how much he loves you quickly turn into dirty talk.

"You're such a good girl."

"You look so pretty wrapped around my cock."

"You're mine, you know that?"

He definitely sticks his fingers in your mouth.

After a certain point, he let's his dick do the thinking for him. You don't mind one bit.

He's all about aftercare. Rags or showers or just physical contact, whatever you want, he's got it. He knows he's not always the best at taking care of you, but this is one instance where he's confident about what he's doing.

Shikamaru Nara

My man is lazy and that doesn't change, even in the bedroom.

He usually doesn't go down on you but enjoys when you sit on his face. He'll wrap his arms around to grip your thighs. He's never one to turn down head but doesn't really make foreplay a priority.

Some might call him a pillow princess at first glance, but it's deeper than that. He has the control, he just let's you do the work most of the time.

You may be on top, but his strong grip and guiding fingers tell you exactly what to do.

Sometimes, he doesn't care for the pleasantries that come with dragging it out. He'll nestle between your legs and let his head dip down to your neck.

Lazy thrusts, but that's fine. Deeper is always better than faster.

He doesn't really do dirty talk, but he's definitely not silent. He's vocal, always groaning, maybe he'll tell you that he loves you if he's feeling a certain way.

Madara Uchiha

Most of the time, he's hate fucking you.

There's no time for foreplay when he's immediately slamming you against the wall when he gets home.

Despite all the anger radiating off of him as he mercilessly thrusts into you, he's calling you the sweetest nicknames he can think of. Love or Darling or something of the sort.

He always finishes inside. You're not sure if he's just too busy letting his frustration out to think, or if he's actively trying to get you pregnant.

It's both... sort of. For him, anger is just passion and fuel. It has nothing to do with his actions. He's pumping you full of his cum because he likes to claim you. He wants you to bare his children. He wants people to know you're his.

Aftercare isn't as straightforward for him. He's not offering to clean you up, but he tries to find ways to subtly apologize for turning you into a toy.

Naruto Uzumaki

Naruto runs on pure instinct in every aspect of his life.

He's doing what feels right in the moment and confirming it with you if it's something he's unsure about. (Consent is key).

He's a people pleaser. He's always making sure he takes care of you before he even thinks about himself. Eating you out, fingering, breast play, whatever you want.

He's sloppy. It's just something that always emerges with him. He's placing wet kisses on your neck, his hand placement can sometimes be a bit awkward, but it all adds to the experience.

His head gets so foggy with love and lust that he honestly can't think straight. The way his body takes control and he ravages you in an almost primal way, it's to die for.

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iannmin · 6 days ago

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What kinks do you think San would have? <3

KINKS SAN WOULD HAVE ⁺₊❆⋆ 최산

🏷️ ⋆ smut, drabble, intentional lowercase, size kink, praise kink, breeding kink (serious), lingerie play, somnophilia, cum play (LOTS of cum)

🗒️ ⋆ RAHHHHHH WTF I’ve been wanting to write this SO BAD!!! thank you thank you so much for the opportunity skjdkskdksk i hope both sides of your pillow are nice and fluffy every time you sleep <3333 also i just couldn’t help but put the edit of long haired san hehe

୨୧ ‘ masterlist ‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹ ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆ ⁺₊❅⋆

PRAISE KINK ⋆

no offence but sannie would be on the number one priority list for those who have praise kink. like can you see how he folds and gets absolutely all squishy and subby when wooyoung praises him? like his cheeks gets all flushed and hot,, he’ll probably desire the same with his s/o, whether it’s him giving or receiving. and to be honest san is more of a soft dom, so he’ll love reassurance. just imagine every time when he’s about to enter you he will most definitely whisper softly “you can take it baby, it’s gonna open up so well for me, your pussy’s gonna feel so good, hm?” (and I’ve noticed that san loves to say ‘hm?’ after his sentence a lot in his voice lives and it drives me absolutely crazy)

SIZE KINK ⋆

sannie is a total sucker for size differences and he absolutely builds his ego off of watching his s/o squirm under his huge frame. like just picture him headlocking his s/o from behind, broad chest sticking to his s/o’s back while just absolutely pounding the fuck out of them and whispering dirty things into their ear ughh. and do you remember that one fanmeeting clip of san’s back facing the audience and wooyoung is literally holding his neck attempting to kiss him??? he’ll probably look like that coming home to his s/o from a long day of work,, kissing them at the entrance as a ‘I’m home’ type of gesture. and also,, that’s probably why san hits the gym sososo much, it’s really just to assert dominance and feel big

BREEDING KINK ⋆

don’t even get me started with this once :,) like do you guys realise how traditional san is? like in terms of family and stuff he seemed to have grown up in a very traditional household where his father was strict on him and all that. like just look at how much respect he has for his parents and how well-mannered he is,, and especially do you remember when san mentioned that if he had a daughter he would raise her in a very princess way but if he had a son he would raise him like his father did in a strict way? so anyways,, the whole point I’m making is that san would probably want to start a family early with his s/o so that they can have cute little family outings together, and he can be a dad. so that’s where the feral breeding kink comes in. like he just goes absolutely bonkers the first time his s/o let’s him hit it raw after their marriage, or even better, when he learns that his s/o wants to try for a baby, so he makes sure to absolutely fill their cunt to the fullest, even going beyond his usual stamina of two rounds because for some reason he keeps getting hard after watching his white cum seep out of their hole and dripping onto their thighs :( P.S. he might even have a sex marathon with his s/o on the week their ovulating just to maximise his chances of becoming a dad

FINGERING ⋆

okay okay, I know sannie is a clean type of person and he doesn’t really like making a huge mess, especially when you see how clean and minimalistic his dorm room is but when it comes to his s/o, all morality just gets thrown off out the window. he goes pussy drunk and fingers them until they’re making an absolute mess. and I’ve seen some people commenting that he has chubby hands like cheese-stick fingers but won’t they feel so fucking good when their up in his s/o’s hole? i bet the stretch is a whole lot better with thick fingers like his and it’s definitely enough to get his s/o squirming and whimpering, even squirting.

SOMNOPHILIA ⋆

sannie treats women with so much respect and probably hates non-con stuff which is a great turn-off for him. but somnophilia? that’s his jam right there. the first time his s/o told him up front that they like being fucked awake no matter when, he was slightly hesitant, but he probably discovered a whole new world right there and then when he slid his dick into their unprepped cunt, the raw feeling being absolutely addictive. so even on days when his s/o looked absolutely unsexy, wearing a pair of kiddy-looking pajamas, he will still have a great urge to pull down those cartooned pants and fuck them. he just can’t get enough of the moment when their brows finally knit together and their eyes flutter open, raising their head from the pillow just to see him wrecking their pussy open, and that’s when all senses and feelings process in their brain and they start moaning and squealing.

LINGERIE ⋆

just a bonus kink here hehe,, and not to mention sannie is not the type to rip open the lingeries because he respects how expensive they are, but he’s more of the type to push their panties to the side and fuck them <3

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fumifooms · 8 months ago

Text

Falin who cares too much and too little - analysis

Been stewing on Falin thoughts for a while, I know I have an interpetation on her that differs from many but I’m jumping into the fray. I think there’s a lot to be said about what we do see of Falin. This shorter Falin analysis I made is heavily encouraged prior reading. This analysis mainly explores her complex relationship with caring and so it’s sort of structured in two halves, with Faligon at the crux of it all.

Falin cares too little :

A lot of people assign Falin a people pleasing mindset and I… Don’t agree. We never see her care at all about people in her town or at the academy not liking her.

We do see her worrying about what people think of her… ONCE. And Laios comforted her, told her they didn’t matter and she should be proud of herself. She latched onto that hard. That’s why this scene was so important to be included during the dragon fight, relationship-defining; it’s always been them against the world. She grew to not care what others thought, to only focus on her close loved ones. No one else matters.

Laios’ words were her world. Her older brother who taught her how to feel comfortable with herself, who told her, you’re great, others are the ones in the wrong to not see that, I’ll always be with you, always be there for you. Older brother who always made great plans, who always knew more, who was better at wrestling to name the dogs, who she has always idolized. Laios who always spoke of traveling the world, to which she always said she wanted to follow. And she would, she’d follow him even if it meant leaving the academy and all she knew behind, she’d follow him to the ends of the world, and that’s what she did.

She didn’t care about showing to her classes or keeping up such appearances, she doesn’t even think of toning down her jumping into bushes when Marcille recoils, etc. She acts like an obedient pawn often, to her parent’s directives and then following Laios around no matter what he decides to do, but I don’t think the motivation is people pleasing, rather it’s being with & caring for her loved ones, and her go-with-the-flow attitude enhances the impression. Not that it’s as simple as that, mind you, but let’s talk about this for now.

Falin is perceived as selfless because we, the audience, have our perspectives revolving around the main people in her life (Laios, Marcille). They’re the ones she’s devoted to and people who care about her back a lot too, but to people like her classmates or the towspeople she probably must have seemed like someone who didn’t care about the people around her or her surroundings a lot, who just went on alone and did her own thing.

What matters to Falin? From what place does her kindness come from? Is a part of her keeping up appearances? And I think that’s the point, the horror of Faligon as well, that we can’t tell just how in control Falin the person is as the chimera (because we are shown that she’s in there, we just don’t know at what degree), that we don’t know her enough to be able to tell when she’s at her most genuine, her most raw. That even if you do settle on none of her being present as Faligon, we have to at least consider it, consider that she may be able to do something like this and have a part in it, brutal and uncaring. That even the lenses we see her through, the people who love her, may be unreliable.

And this is what’s very interesting about her too, she truly is so idealized by people around her as a saint. She’s so good and kind and caring to everyone etc etc etc. Laios, Toshiro and Marcille all see her as the paragon of goodness in the world. More cynical characters like Namari and Chilchuck have more layered opinions on her, the latter finding her somewhat unnerving because he can’t read her well. But then with that one flashback scene we see that… Her priorities are intensely focused on Laios and Marcille, she doesn’t care all that deeply about anyone other than them (+ maybe her parents). The rest of the party is in the same danger here but only Laios and Marcille who she’s speaking to get the special ,ention, and if they don’t cross her mind then of course she’d be ready to sacrifice strangers through a risky teleportation. That doesn’t make her not kind or caring!! Just that greater good isn’t exactly her priority. Any means is alright if the end result is her loved ones safe, it usually takes the form of healing and caring, but we see she’s ready to fight and make dangerous calls too. To me there’s this aspect to her that she isn’t as pure and magnanimous as everyone thinks she is, both in-world and interestingly enough meta wise as well, and there’s something interesting to that.

People pleasing implies a need to be liked, needs for the motivation to be that. A yes-man, etc. But if we analyze Falin, her general kind, smiling demeanor is more a matter of passivity I yhonk. Conflict avoidance is easier, so she’s friendly and hopefully things’ll be smooth sailing. It’s easy to be kind to classmates even if they act wary and rude if you don’t care about what they think either way. Of course she prefers good things happening to people over bad things, she is genuinely kind, but I think people tend to assign her a very grand altruistic way of life when to her the motivation is pretty self-centered. She doesn’t do what she does because she loves them, but because she loves them.

One situation that’s interesting to dig into for her way of thinking, and what I’m trying to get at, is Shuro’s proposal to her. I’ve seen people saying she hesitated because she didn’t feel comfortable saying no even though she wanted to, "I can’t say no, I don’t want to hurt him", something that sounds sensible and familiar, but it’s actually canon in the Adventurer’s Bible that the reverse was the case, that she didn’t feel comfortable saying yes. Because the offer was tempting, but it’d have been a loveless agreement on her end. And it makes sense she’d want to say yes too, like we see with the Toudens, marriage is very much a political strategical economical thing in their village, there’s even a bit on it on Laios’ Adventurer’s Bible profile about dowries, and both siblings were engaged very early. They lived poorly for a long time, it’s an enticing idea to marry rich, to have not only yours but your brother’s needs met forevermore easily, which at one point in their careers was their main worry and goal. Why shouldn’t she accept a life of leisure and wealth handed to her by a lovely friend?

So her hesitance was "yeah that’s convenient for me, but where it’s everything to him and heartfelt I’m able to be detached because I don’t care about it that much… Can I do that? I’m not reciprocating, not saying yes in the way that matters. Can I do that to him?" Very caring even though it’s not what you’d expect, isn’t it?

And central to my analysis, where I’m going with this is, I feel like that’s the thing with her character, that she doesn’t feel as strongly as she "should" sometimes, or feels a different way than she "should", or at least that she feels that way and others say she does. She didn’t mind suddenly leaving the academy, leaving Marcille behind and not seeing her for 4 years. She acted like it was no big deal that she sacrificed herself after getting resurrected after the red dragon fight. And in both those cases it upset the people around her greatly that she didn’t seem to get why it was such a big deal, didn’t seem to care about how they’d experienced her choices.

So it’s a tendency… And it’s not that she doesn’t care, it’s just that the way she measures what’s good for the ones she loves isn’t the same as what they themselves think it is (like Laios and Marcille not wanting to be apart from her). It’s an overt but quiet kind of care, it’s doing things like following them around and making sure they bathe and have a meal, even if that means she has to be dragged into misery too.

So yes she probably would know "not caring enough/the right way" is one of her perceived flaws, and that informs how she tries to handle her response to Shuro’s proposal. Her not wanting to accept like her first gut instinct, is because she’s thinking about reciprocity, about if it’d be right to go into this knowing that they have different priorities and she might not be able to keep up with the type and amount of emotions he wants/expects from her. And that’s a big part of her character isn’t it, having expectations pushed onto her. Her trying her best, but in her own way that may seem odd or even unfeeling. Not unlike when she exorcised the ghost as a kid too, unblinking and matter-of-factly, and not seeming to understand why people stared the way they did.

Even though she answered his proposal only post-canon, she’d been pondering it for a while even pre-canon and the Adventurer’s Bible explanation was released midstory, so I’m hesitant to assign her much growth about her hesitation and what I went on above, since she still didn’t react "right" with Laios after the red dragon fight (even if she apparently doesn’t remember sacrificing herself) and put herself in that situation in the first place. She hasn’t finished her arc on that flaw of hers is what I’m saying, she for sure still has it, but I certainly think her thoughts on Shuro’s proposal shows awareness, both of herself and social.

And awareness is a big analysis key word with Falin, especially here it can be hard not to conflate not caring with not knowing. How socially aware is she? It’s rather layered, because canonically she wasn’t aware of her ostracization in her hometown at all, and we’re not sure if she knew Shuro was interested in her before he proposed, but she generally seems more socially aware than Laios. She tags along on his caravan job to make sure he isn’t being mistreated (though doesn’t ask he get a salary), she catches social faux-pas more easily like in the genderbend magic mirror omake with Shuro, and interestingly enough she’s very good at empathizing with her parents and understanding their perspective. We see when she’s worried about Marcille coming that she does know about propriety and how appearances shape impressions. Being a chief’s daughter must at least have taught her a thing or two on that front.

She never stands up for herself, but when it comes to defending others she worries, strategizes and explains.

And this sort of understanding is part of why I think she’d notice the expectations pushed onto her like I was saying earlier, notice how she makes people feel when she’s careless. But if she changes anything about herself in response to noticing is for her to choose, and generally I think it’s a sort of inbetween of yes and no: that she becomes more complacent but also more reserved, complying but by hiding more of herself passively. She’s not sure wether to accept or reject Shuro’s proposal, doesn’t want to lead him on? She’ll just be taking a while to silently consider it, try to keep things as they are for the time being. The third, less conflicting option. She doesn’t feel heard by Marcille who keeps infantilizing her? Just bear with it. Retract yourself emotionally. Settle for it.

We see that when she was young she had a tendency to not read a room, and I think that’s here too. She doesn’t get why her nonchalance upset others but that doesn’t change that she doesn’t want them upset or hurt, so she tries, albeit in maybe a roundabout way. She always had a hard time deeply connecting with people, often keeping herself some amount of emotionally distant: erasing herself from the equation, from the two-way trade that relationships are and making it a onesided thing instead, where all their needs and emotions are directed towards her but she only lets out a bit of her own show. She takes everything upon her and deals with it and tries not to give others this same burden, though not on a conscious level, it’s just that she’s learned growing up that she doesn’t have much agency.

Like I went into with my analysis linked at the beginning, I think Falin is used to just taking what she can get and not asking for more, when it comes to social bonds. She’ll take spending time with her mother no matter what it is they do, she’ll follow Laios to the graveyards and stick by him even when he’s pushing her away (because he doesn’t want her borrowing his book or "No copying!" or such). Her father was always distant, cold and uncommunicative, her mother was considered sick from anxiety and the exorcism attempts were the main way they spent time together, at dinner tables there were only her and Laios. The dogs picked on her too even if she loved them— And so did the townspeople, maybe that being normal to her at home is why she didn’t notice the ostracization she suffered.

She’s always been the last to be asked about decisions or what she wants, never asked to play with at recess, neither her father or Laios asked before sending her to the academy or leaving the village. At home, in the hierarchy she was considered to be below the dogs by the dogs themselves, as someone they can disrespect. Dogs learn from example and behavior, so this means Falin must have been pushed around a lot, and that the family didn’t try hard to rectify the dogs’ misconception, likely worsened by Laios regularly wrestling with her as a competition.

So for example when Falin showed Marcille food, it was her way to implicitly ask to have lunch with her without voicing that question, without daring to take up space. Someone’s presence isn’t something you ask for, it’s something that’s bestowed upon you, you can follow them around but you can’t ask them to stay or to come with.

She’s used to her needs and wants not being listened to, so she’s learned to have less wants. Caring less about herself, caring less about other people beyond her safe zone, was a defense mechanism in part. She has a sense of learned helplessness too, like how when Marcille came to take her away from Laios, even though she didn’t want to leave with Marcille it felt so determined and unshakable to her that whatever Marcille decided Falin would have to comply with.

And still, it’s the "marrying you would be awfully convenient if it wasn’t that I’d feel guilty for not loving you back, the way you wanted me to when you proposed to me" and the "I don’t regret leaving the academy and leaving you behind without goodbyes but I’m sorry that you’re so much more upset about it than me". It’s the guilt of not loving people back the way they want to be, with the same intensity or fervor.

It’s the autism it’s the aroace of it all, it’s the emotional stunting and confusion but the pit in your stomach telling you you did something wrong again. The no object permanence even for people you love even for 4 years, it’s the feeling like you’re somehow at fault for someone having fallen for you and not knowing what to do with any of it. I’m not joking btw it isn’t uncommon for autistic people to not see their close friends for a long while, not having missed them all that much and for that to be really hurtful for the other if they notice/ask about it. "Hiii bestie! Oh umm you’re uh more emotional about this than I expected, hopefully you won’t feel alienated by me not feeling as intensely about it…"

So… Yeah. I think she thinks of things and relationships in a different way than most people, and beyond "good things happening to people is good" I don’t think she actually cares about people all that much. I’d argue that Laios shows more desire to connect with others and make relationships. And just like with Laios and his own issues with humans, that doesn’t mean her kindness is a lie or ungenuine or worthless! It just means that like, well it’s pretty straightforward really, she’s not all that social and doesn’t see casual bonds as meaning all that much and whatnot. She does want to see people happy, but it’s not as much like… A conviction or goal. She’s too laser focused on a select few people. "It’s not that they’re bad people, they just aren’t interested in humans."

And sometimes it feels like people get defensive about Falin in a meta way too, like if you ever so much as imply Marcille isn’t her whole world or that she isn’t the kindest soul out there then you’re saying she doesn’t care at all or she’s evil. And that’s actualy exactly the sort of vibe I wanted to get through with my analysis above here actually haha, that she does care and she is kind but it’s not in a way that’s quantified or understood in a way that makes people feel comfortable. In a way, that makes people feel insecure because they don’t have the same logic as her, don’t show love the same. And I think this is another stellar depiction of autism, of parts of it that feels unpalatable to many, if I’m making sense. The fandom idealizes her as well, which isn’t uncommon or surprising for the character embodying the trope of the perfect beloved to rescue.

And disclaimer, as I said in the tags I feel like the details of Falin are pretty vibe based when it comes to analysis, there’s absolutely a valid angle where she does super care about everyone always, feel free to disagree with me on the overarching angle of my analysis. There’s enough supporting evidence to tip the balance either way I think, and the reason I’ve chosen this angle is I feel it’s more compelling for the themes in Dunmeshi of idealization and being different, of desires vs wants, and because I think it neatly ties up Falin’s character arc as I’ll go over throughout the next section…

So.

Not feeling as much as she should. And……. Is this not Faligon pushed to the max?

You can’t tie down a dragon. As the chimera, she gets to just not care about everyone else and be on her merry way.

Part of it I think is finding comfort and freedom in the mindlessness, in not having the burden of feelings and connections and a consciousness (despite still ending up seeking those in a stranger, Thistle). Like when she’s dead in the purgatory as well, she gets to just… Hang around and do whatever. Similarly to when she played in the forest instead of going to class in her academy days. That’s what freedom and peace of mind looks like to her. Why she decides to roam post-canon, if only now with the goal to find herself instead, with her mind in tow and somewhere to go back home to.

There’s excellent analytic framing out there about how of course, Dungeon Meshi has a big theme of grief and letting go, and… Falin was always a symbol narratively, idealized by characters and often underconsidered by them despite their love. It was Falin’s choice to sacrifice herself for Laios, she thought it was worth it, knowing that it would be her end. Her resurrection and the process of it intertwining her soul with a dragon’s wasn’t done with her consent, and the subsequent opening it gave her to become a chimera puppet. She’s stripped of her agency consistently, and so… It’s very noteworthy that the final choice, of wether to go back to life or to stay dead, in that purgatory scene, was up to her. And she chooses life, but I do think about her in those fields and how at home she seemed there. Peaceful, by herself in a vast calm expanse she could explore, free.

Personally, I think freedom is Falin’s own subconscious selfish desire. And though to us becoming the chimera is obviously a shackle, I think it felt like freedom to her somewhat, too.

And if you think I’m going wildly off the rails here I want to talk about Laios’ wish of becoming a monster. And to be clear before getting into it, being mentally a monster is absolutely a big part of the appeal for Laios, it’s something that’s consistently referred to, something especially pointed out in the werewolf monster tidbit with Lycion. Right panel is from that, but left panel is from the extra with Izutsumi where Lycion talks about suppressing souls in a beastkin body, the human or the beast soul.

Finding comfort and freedom in being mindless, less sentient, less aware? While being unaware in her hometown might have saved Falin a lot of heartache although perhaps stunted her emotional growth, it’s always been Laios’ curse.

Actively, through his choices, he seeks to grow closer to people, to form deeper bonds, to understand and be undertood, but… On a deep seated level, what he desires is to leave humanity and civilization behind. He has an irrational hatred for humans, born from the trauma of ostracization, being different, being beaten up and rejected consistently through his life. Running away from problems is easier. He wants to be free from being a social animal from a social species who has deemed him the black sheep, he thinks it’d be simpler to just leave it all behind, people and his own humanity. At its core, to Laios becoming a monster is a power fantasy, a coping daydream of "if only I could be strong enough to never be hurt again, the power to destroy anything I want, the power to go somewhere better, if only it was possible for me to never feel hurt again. If only I could be someone, something, that can never be hurt". "If there’s someone you don’t like, you can gobble ‘em up in one bite. If you could fly, you’d be able to leave this village right now." It’s a childhood fantasy, from a deep sense of being misplaced and a desire to be able to stand fearless, thinly covering up resentment that Laios represses.

But you’ll notice, when the Winged Lion is enticing him in the last page, even now with his lifelong wish of becoming a monster on a silver plate, he still cares about his friends. He still has that sense of responsibility to his friends, doesn’t want to leave knowing they’ll be in danger and alone. The offer that his friends may be left unharmed is already good, but Laios also visibly flinches when the Winged Lion offers to specifically care after Marcille and rid her of her biggest fear. Laios’ care runs that deep. Not unlike with the succubus, he resists temptation until he gets reassured that everyone will be okay. But see, what he desires isn’t to stand alongside Marcille until her last days, it isn’t to stay and see how well his friends will live, it’s to go. It’s to leave. It’s to fly away, a monster both in body and mind. He wants to be free from caring here, wants to not have to worry about his friends, wants to just go do his own thing, but for that he needs to feel safe in the belief that said friends will be safe even without him being there to see it, because despite everything else he cares, he does. It’s again that dichotomy about caring and wishing you didn’t, or not caring and wishing you did.

In the end, it’s Falin who achieves that wish. Both by becoming a chimera during canon, and by going traveling post-canon. In the latter, being both free of human relationships as something chaining you while still being uplifted by them, by the knowledge that there are people out there you love and that love you. It’s a theme that can also be connected with Marcille, because she gets anxious over people she loves getting out of her sight, worrying they’ll get themselves killed, that time is passing while they’re away from her. But before she can get to the point where she can both have her freedom and being uplifted by her social bonds, regaining both her individuality and her connections, she has to get a taste of just one at a time. Before they can find balance in her life, she has to see what it’s like to have what she’s never had on its own. Unapologetic freedom, and power.

No one can blame you for not caring enough or caring right if you’re a fricking dragon!!!! You make the rules when you’re a beast and you can just… Fly away. From anywhere, from anything. And if a dog bites you you can just crush it. Instead of being pushed around by the dogs because you’re at the bottom of the hierarchy, you’re now at the top, the one with the power to be heard and do what you want without consequences.

I think she’s on autopilot. I think she’s on autopilot a lot of the time, even before being a chimera, and it’s partly why her will is so weak compared to regular dragons. (Again, read my shorter analysis.) It’s familiar to slip back into the role of following someone around unquestioningly. And that’s what is weaponized when she’s a chimera, that instinct she’s been nursing all her life to unconditionally support, defend and follow someone. Only now, that someone doesn’t matter in itself, only the symbol of it. She doesn’t mind, either way is fine. Her will is weak after all, because she’s trained it to take as little place as it could.

Falin cares too much

She spends all her time caring for Laios and Marcille alternating that none of her care and emotional energy is left for others, including herself. So she had to get relieved of all of that for a bit, becoming the chimera so she could reset and recenter and remember that she, too, indeed, is there and an important part of her own life.

So you’re probably seeing the duality I’m talking about here, Falin is very self-sacrificial but for specific people in ways that they often don’t recognize or appreciate. She cares but selectively, both in people, putting all her eggs in the same baskets, and in the ways she cares after them. She doesn’t care a lot, but when she does she cares a lot. Falin doesn't have a lot of earthly attachments, but when she does, they're her world.

In canon her arc, especially post-canon, is to grow beyond Marcille and Laios. Her caring for her close loved ones held her back from looking after her own self-fulfillment needs. And this is what I mean when I say she cares too much; she could gain from caring more about the world besides Laios and Marcille, both lands wise and people wise. She cares too little, but her arc centers her flaw around caring too much instead. Her pitfalls that Kui highlight over the course of the story, while of course her selflessness is appreciated for how she saved Laios and everyone, on a personal level is shown to be self-effacing and damaging. She’s undermined by Marcille, without the courage to voice her thoughts and wants, she would dedicate her whole life to Laios. And I mean, it’s text, in the response to Shuro’s proposal extra no less. And she’s so laser focused on her most loved people that she’s fine with being callous and risking others’ lives, even.

Post-canon, she needs to leave to find herself, away from them.

Herself. What if she wants to just be with herself for a while.

And this is me reaching but I feel like, not unlike Izutsumi who learns to feel this sense of never being alone, always having someone on your side what with having two souls, the dragon in her would make her consider herself more. She finds it easier to care after other people after all, and in the purgatory fields sequence she takes care to bring the bit of dragon left with her… Not unlike with Izutsumi, having two souls forces you to think about your identity and figure yourself out. Besides being this sort of duo now, where if she wants to care after herself she can channel it to that other side of her too… In meta dragons are symbols of greed, and I think the bit of dragon would push her to want more and listen more to her desires, primal and self-serving as they might be. The dragon soul which warped her human body with feathers and draconic features, her image of perfection marred, her weirdness externalized in a way that’s not palatable. But she doesn’t care, about if her appearance is palatable for most people, she hasn’t for a while now, and that’s great.

Notes & nuance

I’m struggling with the structure of this post, making my points organized, concise and strong at once. It’s difficult to make any statement without going "things are generally like this, but there’s this time that this contradicting thing happened too" or "it’s ambiguous enough that you should just follow my interpretation for the time of this analysis" haha, so this is the pit where I put all the stuff that wouldn’t fit well in other places but are interesting for Falin’s character. This section is pretty separate from the main thesis of the post, it’s just more Falin observations. The post has reached the 30 pics limit so I can’t just pull it up whenever it’s relevant but I really encourage scrolling up to read the stuff I highlighted in her Adventurer’s Bible profile if you haven’t already.

I think with the shy-looking loner type autistic kid archetype, and knowing she didn’t seem to mind others ostracizing her, it’s easy to lose sight of how she was by no means an unemotional child. In all the bits we see of her as a kid she’s bursting with energy and emotions. Canon confirms Laios leaving the village did affect her and make her lonely and she cried a lot, too. She may not be social in the traditional sense, but she was clingy with her brother, and she also never was all that shy about who she was, wearing her heart on her sleeve.And okay. Okay okay okay. Speaking of appearances. About what I said of her not caring about what people think of her, even seeming defiant with the caravan leader… There’s one istanxe of her caring actually, and it’s about how her face blushes easily. I remembered it as being because Laios’ said it and as I rambled Laios’ words are her world, but actually it’s ambiguous. It’s only Marcille imagining up this scenario where Laios says Falin looks weird because of it, there’s no evidence Laios said or thought that at any point. And on the other hand…

Her Adventurer’s Bible says: "5, Lovely Skin. She isn't particularly careful with it, but Falin's skin is fair and beautiful. Possibly as a result, her cheeks seem to flush easily. Marcille's always saying she's cute, and she secretly has a sizable complex about it." The phrasing makes me think the complex she has over her blushing might have developed because of Marcille more than Laios. "Marcille's always saying she's cute, and she secretly has a sizable complex about it." It could be related to how Marcille gets swept away and infantilizes her, calling her cute wanting her to wear cute feminine outfits etc. Again this feels like it relates to Falin’s struggle to be seen for who she is and what she wants to be seen as, her struggle to be recognized, having ideals and perspectives pushed onto her. Here Falin is insecure over her blushing implicitly because she doesn’t like being called cute over it, but that’s not how she wants people to see her. She doesn’t want Marcille to always see her as her 10 years old adorable friend. Like if your friend said you had puppy energy, it can be flattering, but it can also make you insecure.

Here’s a link to what I mentioned about her being uncomfortable wearing feminine outfits. It does seem to be more about comfort than the aesthetic perse, to me. Interestingly the shirt & shorts don’t seem like they show much more skin than her beach outfit, so maybe it’s more about the shirt and shorts being tight-fitting. Like the skirts and heels they feel stifling. Again a bit with themes of freedom and not wanting an aesthetic pushed onto her. So yes just to reiterate, I think this is more about self-affirmation and how her identity and self-image gets shown to others, rather than wishing to hide parts of her body like her blushing etc for people pleasing reasons. Makeup was a way for her to appear how she wants to and feel more confident. It was a way to take control over her own image. She didn’t keep doing it, the narrator stating the process to be ‘troublesome’. Ultimately she still prioritizes her comfort, and it was a lot of recurring efforts to go through.

And on the topic of appearances… A friend once asked me: "Does she really hide herself or not? I keep thinking about "falin is herself first and foremost" (in her Adventurer’s Bible profile) it’s just so. Hmmmmmmmm... I just keep seeing people say she hides her real self from people when I feel like the issue is more about her charitable traits straying too far into becoming flaws but people around her dont realize that..."

Imo the thing is, I don’t think she hides her identity, but I do think she suppresses her individuality for others’ sakes if that makes sense. In the way that only post-canon does she allows herself to go see what the world is like, but that’s not personality wise it’s needs and wants wise. And I do feel like that’s the closest interpretation of canon, she says it herself she doesn’t know what she wants because everything she’s done was always about Laios or Marcille, but she doesn’t change her demeanor or personality for others. But she *will*, like, not ask for things she wants directly, like sharing lunches with Marcille at the academy, she suppresses her wants, doesn’t ask things from people and doesn’t hope for more, hope for better. I don’t think we ever see her actively repress her personality, except like what, being more laidback than enthusiastic but I do feel like unlike Laios with her it’s less ‘appearing stoic to fit in more’ and more ‘yeah i’ll just chill until I’m needed or something activates my enthusiasm’. To which said friend quoted: "to feel like you belong you need to be useful. when you can’t be useful the next best thing is being convenient."

And speaking of passivity… I want to speculate about Shuro’s proposal some more. Shuro and her got along well though we don’t know how much, or how often they hung out, she even saved him from a nightmare. Why did she take so long answering Shuro’s proposal? Was it an effort to preserve or was she really just that conflicted? Procrastination probably yes, but what is the core motivation of itl Considering she ended up saying no to travel the world instead, I don’t think it was as simple as ‘she wanted to say yes for convenience’. Logically it’s what would have been best, but it’s not what she wanted for herself, but it was and still is hard for her to even know what she wants. Probably, since like she states it was a great offer and she doesn’t think she’ll get proposed to again, it’s that self-effacing tendency that yes it’d be convenient and logical, and that makes her want to say yes even if her spirit isn’t in it, because if it’s convenient then that’s more important than her feelings on the matter. Man also… Obviously Marcille is very vocal about how she shouldn’t get with Shuro, but imagine how Falin’s whole perspective on marriage must have felt when her only friend ever is a Romantic with a capital R who gushes about idealized romances and grand gestures and True Love and doing things with fully pure feelings all the time.

AND speaking of passivity!!! How much Falin is "there" as the chimera, just how much she’s master of her actions, is left ambiguous and intentionally so imo, but she’s for sure there & influencing the dragon’s action to some degree. Having a dragon’s foot on her in purgatory that keeps her from moving for sure visualizes how it must have been like, but there’s Falin calling out to her brother Laios, there’s the kind attentions towards Thistle that are so Falin-like, and most explicitly there’s the Adventurer’s Bible stating "Even after becoming a chimera, she has a soul that's as kind as ever", which I honestly dislike, a fantranslation puts it as "Even as the chimera, her caring nature remains" and either way to me it feels like confirmation that it’s her giving those berries to Thistle. Now, wether or not she has the mental capacity of a chicken or something closer to human Falin, no clue, there has to at least be some kind of mind bond between monsters and the dungeon lord, compelling or forcing them to go along with orders, or calling her to him in distress like with the fight on the first floor. But yes, it’s interesting to wonder what it is that a Falin, with her kind soul but without her human mind, would willingly do. On her profile, she’s described as Thistle’s guardian and servant. The power dynamic between the two are very interesting, I already went into how it might have felt like freedom to her while being fake so I’ll reign myself in and just mention it again. She’s still at the heel of someone, only now it’s someone who doesn’t care about her back. Going from being cared for so strongly that it’s suffocating and they would defy death and the world for you, to being devoted to someone who has not one feeling about you besides your utility as a paw . She has all this care to give and to focus onto others and he has none to send back to her and I think that’s part of it. In a way, being left with only her own feelings and a void, without expectations or feelings or ideals pushed onto her, it might have been soothing in itself, and eye opening. But yes the way I think of it, her care for Thistle isn’t unlike the care she gives the ghosts.

Interestingly, the care she extends for the ghosts is sending their soul to a peaceful death, freeing them, of life and any earthly attachment. Take that as you will with the themes of freedom and burden of life and mind, immortality and becoming a warped version of who you were, and such and such.

But going back on the topic of connections and bonds for a bit, I think academy days Falin & Marcille is super interesting bc we’ve never really see Falin form a connection besides with Marcille and even that is kept pretty ambiguous. When was the point that Falin started seeing Marcille as a friend and seeking her out? When was the "I’ll lay down my life for you" point? I’m so fascinated by how she wanted to share lunches with Marcille but never truly asked, only made little "hey want this? I found it isn’t it cool?" gestures of showing things to her… It’s the only way she knows to ask, or maybe it’s the only way she feels comfortable to. In all the scenes of young Falin and Marcille Falin seems comfortable in her friendship with Marcille, but at the same time… I think we see Falin at her most insecure around Marcille, because she really does care about Marcille and what she thinks of her so much, and while Marcille is a bit of an unstoppable force tornado style (affectionate) Falin is something of a doormat. I’d usually say showing her berries was her earnest way to connect and be like "Hey bestie look at this! :]" , but there’s a real possibility that she was self-conscious and holding herself back.

Friendship and Marcille! Involving Laios into this too but, again with the autism thing of not showing you care in ways that others understand, Marcille being very overtly affectionate and clingy was so so soo important… Marcille keeping on hanging out with Falin and caring after her, and being undeterred/unbothered by Falin not always seeming like she cares all that much back in the conventional way, as in Falin acts nonchalant and a bit like she didn’t mind wether she was there with her or not during her outings to the cave dungeon. Caring and being clingy and so affectionate despite that in such a classic Marcille way is soo needed, because so often people will get discouraged by say, their friend not keeping in contact regularly/well, seeming disaffected or as happy-go-lucky as ever even if you haven’t seen each other in a while or when they’re alone, and yes there’s potential for a strong friendship there but someone like Falin won’t be committed enough to reciprocating attention the same way… I hope I’m making sense but yes this angle in particular strongly correlates to autism. And the way Marcille always initiates physical affection, both Toudens being awkward about initiating touch because they don’t know if that’s allowed, if they’re going about the social interaction the right way, if they’re allowed to ask that out of someone…

Another fun observation to make is about the 4 years Falin and Marcille spent apart. Marcille despite being of a long-lived race treated these 4 years of separation with more gravity than Falin did. Falin brushed it off very dismissively to say the least. But then you remember that the amount of time Falin and Laios didn’t see each other after he left the village was 8 years. Double the years, double the time. And that reminder makes Falin’s actions so starkingly understandable. Of course she wouldn’t see 4 years of separation as a long time if 8 years of separation with her beloved brother is her point of comparison. Of course she’d see it as worth it to leave Marcille for 4 years if it meant ending those 8 years instead, especially if she was worried about him (the reason why she followed him into his caravan job).

A friend always says that while Falin is the center of Marcille’s world, Laios’ is at the center of Falin’s, and I tend to agree.

It’s fun to think of how her career dreams had always been shaped by Laios, even when they were kids. Of course there’s how traveling the world began as a dream they talked about and shared, but there’s how he reassures her by listing cool jobs she could do like traveling exorcist, etc. And then of course, she gave up on her magic academy and career path to follow him and do odd jobs, etc etc.

I should go into the violence of Faligon more tbh, because I think there’s an interesting parallel to how she has no problem wacking things with a mace, wether a ghost when she was a kid or a walking mushroom as an adult. Something that often surprises fans when they remember, I don’t really want to get into the whole " Falin hates violence and hates seeing people in pain to an intense degree. ‘If you die do it somewhere where I can’t see’ style’ interpretation, it has some weight but on the whole I don’t vibe with the theory she has a particular aversion to violence, she seems to be fine resorting to it as much as any other adventurer as long as it isn’t needlessly against ghosts. And Falin’s sudden mace hits are fun to me too because it’s not her becoming a berserker when the need arises as much as her becoming active because something she cares about is threatened, and that brings her out of her passivity from 99% of the rest of the time. Thistle included. Falin always could be violent, she just dislikes senseless carnage. The Shuro party vs chimera fight is a bit ambiguous on it, because you can argue she only attached after being provoked, presumably offscreen as well while the ninjas went off to fight the harpies. Falin becomes the most active when she needs to protect someone, she has no qualms doing whatever’s needed for that, wether it be leaving the academy & Marcille without notice no matter the consequences or what her parents think, or teleporting the party, etc.

I’m working on a post specifically pointing out all the differences between Falin and Laios, but yes I think both of them selfishly desire freedom in different yet similar ways. Falin’s dark secret is "Ethics and risks are optional if it means I can protect those I love" like the teleportation, and Laios’ is "Ethics and risks are optional if I can be free of all this bullshit" aka humanity aka his wish with the winged lion.

Conclusion

Flighted birds have hollow bones. With freedom and wings there comes risks and sacrifices.

Tldr: Falin doesn’t care all that much, she’s very go with the flow. For example if someone hates her she doesn’t really care because that’d require her caring about what they think of her in the first place, and she only cares about her loved ones. She smiles, but it’s more a state of being rather than out of active goodness: she’s canonically very genuinely kind, but it’s more out of a general want for pleasantness than active care itself. She’s passive, and softspoken because that’s just how she seems, but she has no problem hopping into bushes or getting heated if something calls to her enthusiasm or calls for action and a hit of the ol’ mace. Her loved ones needing tending or protective is what makes her go from passive to active. That familiar autopilot mode of making someone the center of her world and following their every move is what made her so easy to be controlled as the chimera, even ferociously defending him with her life. Faligon is most interesting to me with the theme of freedom. She’s shackled to Thistle and out of her mind, but there’s also a sense of empowerment and freedom from expectations and society. She spends all her time caring for Laios and Marcille alternating that none of her care and emotional energy is left for others, including herself. So she had to get relieved of all of that for a bit, becoming the chimera so she could reset and recenter and remember that she, too, indeed, is there and an important part of her own life. There’s a way of caring after others that can be selfish, not unlike Marcille being overly coddling and not listening to Falin. In Falin’s case, I think it was so selfless that it ended up looping back around to erasing her sense of self. In losing sight of herself, that devotion becoming neither quite selfish or selfless but a fact of life and a state of nature, muddled by its lack of direction.

She’s sooo used to never being able to ask things out of others, you get the crumbs of affection and approval that others offer to you unprompted and that’s it don’t hope for more don’t ask for more. (Also reflected in how she follows her loved ones around without complain or personal opinions and how she’s not willing to rock the boat and affirm herself in her relationships like with Marcille during canon)

Falin cares so much, so much and so laser focused on her few loved ones that it blinds her and she loses sight of everything else, she ends up neglecting herself and the rest of the world. As Kui puts it, Falin is herself first and foremost. She just had to remember the importance of that.

I see her as an enneagram 9, which can be surprisingly accurate and fun to research through the lense of Falin. Excerpt below from this book, but like my god, good way to put it

That’s it, ty for reading. Even if it’s a bit of a mess, hopefully you’ll have gained a thing or two from it. Falin is a character hard to pin down, but it is very gratifying when you find the way that the puzzle pieces fit together right for your own understanding of the story. Fantranslation of the shuro proposal comic by @/thatsmimi here.

Here’s my spotify playlist for her if you’d like

Sometimes love is about letting go, a lesson a lot of the cast needed to learn. Self-love’s important too, and just like with diets we need a healthy balance.

#I find it hard to express myself right on the topic of Falin. Both because the issue is pretty vibe based and because we don’t #get that many moments with her. So there’s ambiguous scenes up to interpretation addressing a layered topic and like. Save me. Save me #As always falling down the rabbithole of starting an analysis about a specific facet and then needing to explain everything else around it #I’m doomed. I’m getting lost in the sauce.#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #falin touden #analysis #character analysis #meta #autistic reading #aroace reading as well. Sort of. It’s mentioned #The aroace autistic guilt of not caring back in the way/with the intensity you’re expected to #As always this is just my interpretation blablabla #Spoilers #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #She loves like a dog aka unconditionally and happy with eating scraps of affection and attention off the floor #Laios touden #he’s here too bc they are an unit #If you’re not capitalizing on the uncanny vibe autistic effect for Falin’s character u are missing an opportunity imo #Fairy’s child is written all over her. Her cryptic-ness is the point so why am I surprised she’s hard to fully pin down #Even with the graveyard scene it was Falin following Laios… Sob. Laios could feel responsible her powers were found out #I’d like to rework this at some point if i get better at structuring. I’m not satisfied by the level of clarity #Will 90% for sure edit stuff in if i find more to say.#Fumi rambles #Crazy style #I give a TLDR at the end if you’d prefer. It doesn’t have the like evidence/explanations alongside but it makes the main points i think

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rosenclaws · 20 days ago

Text

Lost || Logan Howlett x Reader

summary: You risk your life on missions when you shouldn't. Logan can't stand it. He thinks it's because you want to play hero. It isn't until something shifts that he realizes there's more to it. That the two of you are more alike than ever.

warnings: Suicidal ideation, implied Self harm (scratching), depressive thoughts and feelings, self hatred manifesting in different ways, mostly the reader is very mean to themselves, the reader is having a mental spiral basically, poor eating, angst, injuries, hopeful ending.

wc: 3.3k

a/n: PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS! This fic contains very triggering topics and if you think that reading or being exposed to them will hurt you please DO NOT READ. I value peoples well being over this fic 1000%. If I'm being honest this was my own kind of therapy. The way I wrote the reader's thought process and feelings is a lot like my own. I've been going through it a little and I just needed to get something out. I would also like to disclaimer that I am okay! Please take care of yourself first and be gentle to yourself. If you need someone to talk to my dms and inbox are open or please consider reaching out to someone

Things worked like clockwork around here. The kid would go to class. Do their homework. Play outside. The adults would be training or teaching. Dinner was at the same time every night. Occasionally the team would get sent on a mission and even then things worked like they normally did.

Scott led the team with a plan, Logan usually ignored that plan, Ro got between them when their childish bickering got to be too much, and you all got home just fine.

"Again?" Beast is shaking his head as you hobble into the lab again. A pained smile on your face as Scott helps you onto the cold metal table.

"What can I say beastie, I just love your company." You groan as he gently touches your side. A sharp pain shoots through your body and dark spots cloud your vision.

"Broken ribs, definitely." He mutters as he writes something down. He asks you to follow his finger and you do your best.

"Concussion. Again." You wince as his tone grows harsher.

"Superficial cuts and bruises." The list goes on and on as you're examined.

"Can you just prescribe me some pain meds and let go? That's what we did last time." You ask and he just looks at you like a disappointed parent.

"We did that last time and the time before that and the time before that. This is your third concussion and I can't even remember how many broken ribs." You feel like a child as he starts lecturing you on safety and the dangers of missions and blah blah blah.

Look you get that this isn't great but you're an X-Man right? They help people by any means even when the world seems to hate them. So you're helping people by putting yourself in harms way. Even your teammates.

"I really don't understand why you continue to do this to yourself." Beast injects something into your arm and you flinch.

"Fuck! A little warning next time please." You rub your arm and close your eyes as the exhaustion is starting to catch up to you.

"No missions for at least three months." He says to Scott who you forgot was still there.

"What!" You shoot up and double over in pain from your ribs.

"Come on, you can't bench me for three months." You whine as you look at Scott.

"Our top priority is that you're safe and healthy firefly." Scott says and you scoff.

"No our top priority is helping people." He sighs and pats you on the shoulder. Great, is this another scolding? Beasts was like a parent but Scott was always more brotherly than anything.

"Firefly, We understand the want to help but you can't help people if you keep getting hurt. You throw yourself into danger without even thinking about it."

"So does Logan!" You protest but you know the argument is futile.

"Logan has rapid healing factor. You don't. Look, just take the three months okay? Please? We worry about you." Scott says with such sincerity it makes you feel a little bad.

"Okay fine." You mumble in agreement. Satisfied with your answer Scott leaves, letting Hank patch you up. You're silent as you think back to the mission.

It was dangerous. You weren't dealing with low level grunts or something. These people were deadly. They weren't going to spare anyone. Rogue and Jubilee joined the mission and as much as you loved them they weren't ready. The fight was getting messier and exhaustion was kicking in.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Jubilee and Rogue barely fighting off their attackers. Without thinking you jump in to help them. The calls to retreat came and you saw Logan come help the three of you. His claws sliced his way through.

"Get back to the ship!" He growled as he took down yet another man. Everyone else was safe except for the four of you.

"Go, I'll be right behind you!" You yell over your shoulder.

You put up a wall to block the bullets as you walk back. In your head you know how this plays out. You get on the ship and they shoot it down, killing you all. Or you don't make it. Or a million other ways it can go wrong. As Logan grabs Jubilee and Rouge and pulls them onto the ship he holds his hand out to you.

"We need to go!" Without thinking you take down you start to build energy in your hands. The wall wavers as the bullets continue.

"Quit fucking around and get in here!" Logan roars. Sorry Logan, you tend to ignore him anyways on missions. Which is how you tend to get hurt but you always end up okay.

"I got this!" You can hear Logan's angry shouting as the plane door closes. They had no choice but to listen to you. A bullet pierces your wall and rips through your side. You let out a cry as your knee buckles. Sweat pours down your face as you gather every last bit of your energy into your hands.

"Eat shit." You snarl as you make eye contact with who you assume was the leader.

You release the energy and it blasts through everyone and everything around you. The ship is safe due to protective measures but you aren't. The blowback slams you into the hard jet doors. A sickening crunch as your body hits the cold metal. Your vision becomes hazy as you hit the ground hard. Spots dancing in your vision as you crawl away from the jet.

Everything fucking hurt. You vaguely hear the doors opening again and the hands-on your face. Someone's talking to you but you don't register a thing they say. Which landed you back in the lab. Right now getting patched up.

"Thanks Hank." You say as you hop off the table. You decline any help getting to your room and awkwardly walk to the doors. To your surprise, Logan stands right outside of them. Arms crossed a really pissed off look on his face.

"Logan, always a pleasure." You flash a smile and he rolls his eyes. He stalks after you as you walk slowly to the elevator.

"Did Charles send you to check up on me or something because I'm really not in the mood."

"What the fuck were you thinking?" He snarls. He slams his hand on a button and the elevator stops.

"Logan I really want to go to bed." You groan as you try to push past him but to no avail. It was like a brick wall.

"No, you're going to shut up and listen. I don't know what compels you to be so incredibly stupid but you need to fucking quit it." You shrink under his harsh words.

"I've seen people like you before, always trying to play hero. You're reckless. Putting yourself into danger so you can be the one to save the day." You let him rip into you. Not speaking a word he slams his hand on the button and the elevator moves again.

"Nothing to say?" He rolls his eyes and storms out of the elevator.

"I'm sorry." You whisper to no one as the elevator doors close on you.

No one sees you for a while. You stay locked up in your room. Not even coming out for food. Every day some student brings food to your door and leaves it there. You wonder who told them to do that. Jean maybe, probably 'Ro.

Sometimes you take it just so they don't worry but other times you leave it there until the next plate comes. You spend your day staring at the ceiling or sleeping. Sometimes though you're too tired to sleep. Does it make sense? No but it's how you feel. Logan's words replaying in your head.

If Beast and Scott were like family, Logan was something more. As much as you tried to hide it your feelings had changed, evolved from friendly into something more. You cared so much about what he thinks of you even when you don’t want to. You can’t help it.

So his words cut deeper than anyone else's. You aren't trying to be a hero or take the glory. But maybe you are? Maybe you want that love and recognition from people, from him. Does it matter though? What your intentions were?

Apparently, you come across as an egotistical reckless person with a hero complex. It's not like that. You argue with yourself about it all the time. Shifting from hero to villain in an instant. You're selfish. You do it for attention.

No wonder he thinks that way. Does everyone else think so too? But you care. You're an X-men but you aren't one of the X-men. You're not the one people think of when they come to save the day and you're okay with that. Your expendable. Better you than them. Right? You've hurt people in your past. You aren't worthy of this life. This family. You need to prove yourself. Sacrifice yourself if needed.

The spiral won't stop. It never. Stops. You can't get it to stop. You just want peace. Just one day where you don't wake up and feel guilt in everything you do. A loud knock on your door rings through your room but you don't move.

"Hey." It's Logan. What is he doing here?

"Look I uh, I shouldn't have snapped at you. The other day." You can tell he's struggling to get his thoughts out. Not that he didn't want to do it, he just didn't know how.

"I was angry." He waits a few moments and you hear a frustrated growl.

"Come on firefly, you've been holed up here long enough." You roll onto your side to face the door. Looking at his shoes through the small crack in the bottom. He's pacing.

"Seriously I-er We're getting worried alright?" You don't catch the slip of his tongue. Too wrapped up feeling guilty. Again. Guilty for hurting your team, for not understanding what was wrong with you. Guilty for even feeling this way in the first place.

"I thought you should know that Remy's making your favorite dinner." You hear him sigh and walk away. More guilt creeps up on you. You're making everyone worry about you.

You're being selfish, just pull it together. Beating yourself up over and over again. As the sun goes down the smell of dinner wafts through your room. It doesn't normally do that so you suspect someone is trying to lure you out. Enough of this.

You get up and change your clothes. You stop and look in the mirror, trying to put on your best smile. You don't look very convincing but it should be fine. Peeking your head out you hear a lot of voices coming from the kitchen. You quietly walk into the doorway.

It takes a second but someone notices you and then everyone does. The talking dies down as they just stare at you. It's really uncomfortable. You feel terrible for making them worry. You don't deserve to be worried about like this.

"All this for me?" You joke and thankfully the room grows louder again.

You say hi to some of the people who come up to you. A plate is placed in front of you and you graciously accept it. Looking across the room you can see Logan staring at you. He's silent but watching your every move.

"So how's recovery coming? You've been taking bed rest pretty seriously." Scott says with a smile.

You know he doesn't mean anything by it but for some reason, it stings. Like you've been lazy or something. You're a mutant. Recovery shouldn't take this long. You're not putting in the work. You're wasting your time. You don't get to rest.

"Hey? Firefly?" You snap out of it and put on a smile.

"Going great, it's nice being able to sleep without interruption." People seem to accept that answer and the conversation moves on.

You pick at your food, moving it around your plate and chopping it up but never putting it in your mouth. It's your favorite meal but you just, can't bring yourself to eat it right now.

The room is so full of talking and laughter but for some reason, you feel a million years away. Like you're lonely. Really, really lonely. How can that even be? To feel so alone while being surrounded by so many people.

As dinner wraps up you quietly slip out. Sneaking out to the gardens instead. It's cold and you have no coat but you don't care. Some fresh air is what you need. Maybe the trees can tell you what's wrong with you. You find a small bench and sit down.

The stars shine so nicely tonight. You wonder what it'd be like to be a star. If it's freeing to be up so high. Or is it lonely? To lack the warmth of the sun and be a million light years away from each other.

"What are you doing out here?" Logan stands in front of you. You hadn't even noticed him.

"Nothing." He lights a cigar and takes a seat next to you. His legs spread out, knocking his knees into yours.

"So you wanna tell me what's going on?"

"What are you talking about?" You wrap your arms around yourself, trying to hide away.

"You may have fooled everyone else but I know somethings going on in that head of yours." You just shrug.

"I'm fine."

"Bullshit." Logan scoffs. You watch the soft glow of cigar ash tumble to the ground.

The light dies out as it hits the cold cement. He wants to help, or at least he wants to listen. For some reason, you can't get the words you. Anger replaces any rational thought. You want him to leave, to not care so damn much.

"Why do you even care? Last time I checked you don't do these heart to hearts." You snap.

The cold air bites your face and you shiver. Your nails scratch down your arms harshly. The slight stinging soothes you in some fucked up way. Logan notices and grabs onto your hand. Taking it and holding it in his warm one.

"Just leave me alone Logan." You try taking your hand away but he won't let you.

"No. You're right I don't do the sappy shit but this is different. It's more than you're letting on." You feel a pit forming in your stomach.

Everything in your body screams for you to run. To hide and put up your walls and ignore this ever happened. But then you look into his pretty hazel eyes. The rough and tough Wolverine was silently begging you to stay. To talk to him.

"I don't try to be a hero, It's not a hero complex, or a savior complex or whatever you want to call it." His thumb rubs over your hand as you talk. He wants to butt in but he lets you talk.

"I don't know. It's a lot. What goes on in my head." You start to count the blades of grass that you can see. Anything to keep you from breaking down.

"I don't care if I get hurt if I'm helping people. I just. It's how I help. My life is worth saving people. Saving you guys. I don't care if..." You trail off. You can't get the words right.

"You don't care if you die." Logan finishes. He swallows harshly. It breaks his heart to hear but that small part of him understands. More than you’ll ever know.

"Kind of. It's complicated alright? I'm not actively trying to die but...Look I don't think I deserve this life sometimes. I've caused a lot of hurt and I've lost so many people." Logan reaches up and wipes away a tear.

There's a lot of pain that sits with a lifetime of trauma. Pain that you've chosen to ignore over and over again. Burying it until you've convinced yourself this is what life is like. What you deserve.

"It's stupid right? There's so much that I should be grateful for. What right do I have to complain about?"

"You're a mutant, your life hasn't been easy."

"Yeah I guess." Logan doesn't let go of your hand. He holds it, squeezes it. Its warm and fits perfectly with yours.

"Life sucks, a lot. Trust me I understand. It's like the days blend together right? There's this massive hole that just seems to get bigger. You can stuff it with things, try and close it up or even pretend it never exists. But it never goes away." Logan says.

He understands because he feels the same way. Maybe not exactly how you feel but he knows what its like. To have this, hatred for yourself grow and fester until you can't breathe. You convince yourself that nothings going to change so why even bother?

"I just want it to go away." You whisper sadly.

"It will, we're tough. We survive."

"What if I'm tired of surviving? What if I don't want to be strong anymore?" You confess. You feel like you have to be strong all the time and it weighs you down like bricks. You're drowning.

"That's okay, you come to me and I'll carry what you can't." He pulls you in closer and you bury your face in his neck. He's warm, protecting you from the chill.

"Just please, promise me no more heroics on missions okay?" He mumbles.

You scared the shit out of him. You were bleeding and in so much pain. You couldn't even register that it was his hands on your face. That he carried you to the jet and held you while you went in and out of consciousness. He stayed by your side until you got back. He disappeared to the background as Scott took you to the lab. His worry and fear of losing you turning to anger. Wondering why you continue to put yourself in danger.

"Okay." You lean in and press a light kiss to his cheek.

"Logan, Can I ask why you're out here? How did you even notice something was wrong?" It's not that you weren't friends, in fact you were closer than most. But Logan isn't really the best with this kind of thing. Yet somehow, he always knows what to say.

"You mean a lot to me firefly..."

He could tell you that he loves you right here and now. Tell you that you're everything to him. How he's fallen in love with you over the years. But he keeps it inside. It's not the right time. Sometimes love isn't enough to get better and he knows that there's work to be done. He doesn't want to put this pressure on you to get better for him. He wants you to get better for yourself. He'll be by your side for the whole thing though. He won't let you spiral as long as he's there.

"You mean a lot to me too Logan." You smile, a real one this time. He caresses your face, tilting your head as his lips kiss your forehead. You giggle as beard tickles your skin.

"There's that sweet sound," He hums. He takes off his jacket and places it on your shoulders. The worn leather smells like him.

"You really think things get better?" You ask as you link your hand with his. He doesn't answer right away. He'd be a hypocrite to preach that everything's fine and dandy all the time. Sometimes he doesn't believe it himself. But he keeps going, every day. Just as you do.

"Yeah I do, I don't know when. But someday it will." You nod and rest your head on his shoulder. It might take a long time until you truly feel better but you can keep going. Waking up and living.

With a hope, no a belief, that someday. It will get better.

#logan howlett #logan howlett x reader #wolverine x reader #logan howlett angst #logan howlett x you

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