#tw u!patton
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The Real Monster
Based on: Tiktok by @king.kai.2
WARNING: Unsympathetic Patton | Remus being.. Remus | An inordinate amount of swearing | Hurt/Comfort
Summary: Patton is an asshole, then it's a dukeceit hurt/comfort
A/N: I’m back from the dead. Did you miss me?
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“You’re a monster!” Janus exclaimed, his accusation ringing off the empty walls of canyon leading down to the subconscious
Patton returned it with a heartless, cold laugh. “Trying looking in a mirror.” The setting sun gave his sky blue eyes a wicked glow. With the flick of a wrist the chains binding the yellow side pulled him off the surface into the abyss below, letting go when it was too late to stop his descent.
He fell, the wind swirled around him like tentacles and though the fall was all too familiar it felt like a taunt when not by choice. The very darkness at the bottom seemed a mocking grin. Janus let his body fall until the ground approached, using the shadows around him to get away just before the ground and appear in their humble.. mess of living quarters.
Shadow walking was a rather valuable skill when it came to falls, when the light disappeared so could he. Janus was one of two sides able to do it, the other being Remus after begging to be taught. Now wasn't the time to dwell on that though.
What mattered was that the light[core] sides were ruled by a dictator and his name was Patton. Janus had attempted many a coup in the past to no avail. This time was a particularly bitter defeat, as not only did Thomas witness this, harming his chances of actual success, but he took a physical toll in the form of 3 sword wounds (courtesy of Roman), 16 scales stolen for 'research', and a choice dagger from Virgil to the ribs.
While ordinarily a core side could heal these in a matter of seconds, a non-core side/dark side, (thanks, Roman) had a bit more trouble. You see, by living and working in the subconscious they weren't given the attention, care, nor power to expend on instantaneous healing. Instead, they either had to ask a healer like Roman or Patton to help [which never happens] or deal with it until it goes away on it's own only mildly sped due to being imaginary. In total, the wounds would likely take around 7 months in total. The dagger would probably be the last to fade due it's depth and potence. Yet, it would take longer if he couldn't find the first-aid kit. WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO?!
"Remus! Did you steal the first aid to drink the rubbing alcohol again?" Janus yelled out.
Remus emerged from the hallway leading down to their rooms. "What if I did- the hell happened to you? And why didn't ya tell me so I could watch??" Remus whined towards the end.
"It was.. unexpected. But in short, Roman, Virgil and Patton happened." Janus said gesturing to various wounds.
"Shit. Did Thomas see it?"
"Yes, in fact he asked Roman to handle 'it'" Janus said tired. An 'it' what lows had he fallen to? The room began spinning and he clutched the counter.. no, don't you dare pass out.
"Damn, that makes a good nightmare! Blooding spilling from his chest and slowly picking his skin away, then suddenly-" Remus was cut off from his excited spiral by a thud on the linoleum kitchen floors. "Dee? Where the fuck- oh. OH SHIT! SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT! Don't fucking die, don't you fucking dare! Just.. um.. fuck!"
Double D was laying motionless on the ground, red spilling out around him. Remus wasn't much for fixing wounds but this is Dee. He's an exception. Remus hoisted the snake into a bridal carry, he's not exactly a heavy side, and laid him on the couch. Remus levitated the med kit as he wrapped gauze around the sword wounds close to the waist, and put a massive plaster on the dagger spot.
Janus' vision was blurred but clearing up. Fuck, he passed out. He looked to over to see a rare sight. Remus had a looked of concern and concentration on his face. It was almost nice to see him care like that.
"Dee! Don't ever fucking pass out on me again!" Remus said clutching Janus' upper arms. Janus winced involuntarily, causing pure concern to Remus' expression "Sorry, sorry."
"It's.. fine Remus. Let me handle it from here." Janus reached for the kit only to see his hands betray him by shaking in front of him.
"Nah, I think I got this. Also, did ya see your own hand?? Hell no."
"Ugh. Fine." Janus spat
"Now, where's the last juicy detail for tonight's revenge stabbing dream?"
"There, be gentle.. please?" Janus pointed to his left upper arm.
Then Remus found where the scales were missing. It was a massive spot of raw flesh where glistening green scales used to be, now bleeding like a waterfall. He worked more careful then he ever had in his life, slowly cleaning up until he found the source and wrapping it tight. Janus winced in response. and the gauze was loosened slightly. Red was already seeping through the bandage to the surface despite three layers of wrapping.
"I'm gonna kick that froggy ass into the fucking sun, this shit is a) my god damn territory, b) fucking overkill as hell and c) done to my lover- friend. yes.." Remus' cheeks flushed slightly.
"Ah.. your lover? Is that what you want us to be?" Janus smirked
"Shut up, you ding-dong ditched death." Remus crossed his arms and turned away
"We can't die, darling. I would've just.. been an emblem for a bit."
"Don't call me 'darling like that.. and I know but... maybe I need someone to talk to sometimes." Remus was clearly struggling for words.
"Right, of course. You totally don't pet names in spite of the many you've given myself and others."
"I- Well- SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Remus spat out, flustered. "I'm gonna go work on my nightmare. So... just... stop it.!?"
Remus rushed out of the room, slamming his door moments later. Leaving Janus alone on the ratty, piece of cloth, patches and stuffing they called a couch. He lifted himself to be upright, with some difficulty and at last stood up to go to his room.
He treaded over and gently closed the door behind him. It was a shame his dominant hand would now be more difficult to use. He put on a loose yellow t-shirt, some fresh trousers to sleep in and put away his gloves, hat, capelet, and bloodstained shirt and pants. Laundry was going to interesting and he would have to sew up those holes. That was for later though. Janus could afford a bit of time for a nap before getting to his actual duties.
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After roughly an hour, Remus' Magnum- go-fuck-yourself-Patton-Opus was perfectly gory and grotesque. He went to tell Jany in the living room, but he wasn't there. He felt a panic in his chest, and almost went to pummel his brother for stealing an nearly-corpse, when he thought maybe that hypocrite went to his room and pushed it instead of resting on the couch.
Remus opened the door, and saw Dee taking a nap, with an alarm set. Hypocrite. Remus turned off the alarm, and darted his eyes before landing a small peck on Dee's head. Damn, his skin is fucking soft, how the hell? Shit- he's moving! Go. Run. Hecanneverknow. RUN
#hurt#comfort#hurtcomfort#angst#mildangst#mild angst#a bit of angst#mostly hurt comfort#dukeceit#dukeceit hurt comfort#tw u!patton#u!patton#patton being a dick#tw swearing#tw lots of swearing#lots of swearing#tons of swearing#based on a tiktok#tw remus being remus#tw remus#duke remus#remus sanders#ts remus sanders#ts remus#ts duke#ts dukeceit#ts janus#janus sanders#deceit sanders#ts deciet
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Just a short one for now to prepare for a long angst boi coming next
[< Prev] || [Masterpost] || Next...
#sanders sides#roman sanders#ts roman#remus sanders#ts remus#patton sanders#ts patton#comic#long post#doodlem8#logan sanders#ts logan#virgil sanders#ts virgil#unsympathetic patton au#unsympathetic patton#u!patton#u!patton au#tw violence
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SIDES! SIDES! SIDES!
#featuring a bunch of design headcanons just for fun <33#sanders sides#roman sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#remus sanders#janus sanders#virgil sanders#sanders sides fanart#tss fanart#sasi#sasi fanart#sasi virgil#sasi roman#ts sides#sanders sides art#tss art#sasi remus#sasi janus#sasi logan#sasi patton#thatsthat24#eyestrain#eyestrain tw#tw scopophobia#scopophobia#remus u bastard
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Royal Promise
Summary: Or five times the twins made royal promises to each other and the one time they finally learned of its origin.
Pairings: None, BROTHERLY CREATIVITWINS
Warnings: Nightmares, slight mention of thunderstorms, angst, unintentionally u!patton and u!logan
(A/N: Fun fact the word count for this fic is 10, 792 words! My biggest word count yet!)
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For as long as they could remember, the royal promise was a special and almost sacred pact that the twins made. It was their thing that no one else had or did. They made it clear that it was special, something meant for royals or very big important promises that can’t be broken. It was a sealed deal and breaking a royal promise comes with heavy risks. The one who made the royal promise would deal physical pain to the one given the promise. So, the twins would take the royal promise very seriously. They never used it for anything small. Strangely enough, no one, not even Logan or the twins themselves knew of its origin. It’s just been their thing that they’ve had since the aftermath of the split.
1.
Despite Remus being loud and rambunctious, he never really liked loud noises that weren’t his own. He didn’t like yelling either if wasn’t the fun kind. He hated it when the other sides started arguing and yelling. He didn’t like it when Virgil screeched or when Patton cried out in anger. He didn’t like it when Logan angrily told him off. He didn’t look like it, but Remus also hated the loud noises that thunderstorms made. Sure, he could play in the storm all he wanted but once he heard that loud bang of thunder, he’d run back in to either hide somewhere or go cling to his brother.
This is why Remus has a hate-love relationship with storms. They’re fun to play in but they’re loud and noisy and they make him think too many bad thoughts. What if lightning hits their home and catches it on fire? What if it hits Roman and he catches on fire? What if it hits Janus or Virgil? What if the thunder banged so loud his ears exploded and he can’t hear anymore? Janus had already told him those things can’t happen, but Remus’ mind isn’t exactly good at staying quiet for even five seconds.
That’s why Remus finds himself restless one night as a storm rolls in. According to Logan, this storm was going to be a big one. That meant lots of thunder and lightning. While everyone else seemed to be getting cozy for the evening, Remus was coloring on the floor while his twin brother seemed preoccupied with something else that he can’t see. Meanwhile, Janus is sat on the couch and reading his book. The heavy rain is already starting to pour outside the window.
Remus looks up from his coloring book and gazes at the window, the storm whirling and swirling with rain outside. He hopes it’s just rain and nothing more. He then glances at Roman and hums curiously. His brother had come running in with a bunch of stuff and said he was going to make something. When Remus asked to help or watch, Roman said no and that this was very important that he had to do it alone. Remus was a little hurt, but he knows Roman cares about his creations, so he let him be. He’ll probably show him later. He then huffs and sighs.
“Are you done yet, RoRo?” Remus whines, flopping onto his back.
Roman chuckles.
“Not yet, Ree.” he answers, turning to flash a quick smile at his twin.
“But you’ve been working on that—”
Lightning then flashes brightly and-
BANG!
The thunder followed, loud and almost monstrous.
Remus jolts and squeaks before running off to his and Roman’s bedroom, squirming under the bed.
Meanwhile Janus sighs and closes his book.
“Oh, Remus…”
He then climbs off the couch.
“Don’t wander off, Roman.”
“I won’t.” Roman replies without looking up.
Janus nods, curious as to what Roman is up to. He wouldn’t tell him either. For now, he makes his way to the twins’ bedroom. He opens the door and looks around the messy room they share.
There’s stuffed toys and pillows strewn on the floor by the bed. Crayons and papers filled with drawings are scattered on the desk by the window. A paper crown sits on the red chair and a big book sits on the green chair.
“Remus?” Janus calls. “Where are you, little squid?”
Rumbling thunder replies instead and Janus inches towards the bed, pausing when he hears it creak and something thump under it.
“Remus, are you under there?”
A soft whimper.
“No…”
There he is…oh dear, he sounds scared.
Janus goes over to the other side of the bed and smiles when he sees Remus’ butt sticking out from under the bed along with his wiggling feet. He sighs and crouches down.
“Boo.”
“Eep!” *thunk* “Ow!”
Janus laughs a little.
“You really are so good at hide and seek.” he teases.
Remus squirms, still trying to hide under the bed. His chubby tummy stops him going in any further though.
“I am hidden! The thunder can’t get me here if I hide!” he huffs before squeaking as the thunder rumbles again.
“Remus…you know thunder can’t hurt you indoors. You don’t have to hide.” Janus replies, tugging on his leg.
“No!” Remus squeals, yanking his leg away from Janus. “I’m hiding here until the thunder goes away!”
Janus sighs. He loves the twins, but damn are they stubborn.
“Remus…”
Then Roman comes running in.
“Janus, did you find Remus yet?” he asks, hands hidden behind his back.
Janus nods and tips his head.
“He seems determined to hide under the bed until the storm passes.” he answers, moving aside.
Roman giggles and goes around the bed, plopping on the floor.
“I thought you loved storms, Ree.” he teases, poking his twin’s leg.
“Not when they’re stupid loud.” Remus huffs.
Roman smiles sadly. He knows his twin hates loud sounds that aren’t his. There are even days when he gets overstimulated from outside noise. He then pulls out what he’d been working on behind his back.
“I have something for you. You’ll have to come out from there if you want to see it.” he says a moment later.
“For me?”
“For you.”
It takes a moment, but Remus manages to squirm out from under the bed, shaking the dust out of his messy hair. He then sits up and blinks. In front of him on Roman’s lap is a cuddle-sized, green octopus with black button eyes and a matching mustache. There are patches of red here and there on its head.
Roman grins.
“I know you don’t like storms and you don’t have a little friend with you like Mrs. Fluffybottom. So, I made one for you! Do you like him?” he hands the octopus to Remus.
Remus takes it with wide, red sparkling eyes.
“He’s…He’s so ugly!” he giggles, hugging the plushie close. “I love him!”
“Perfect! He’ll keep you safe and sound from the storm.” Roman grins.
Remus blinks at that and gazes at his new octopus friend.
“Really?”
Roman hums and nods.
“Yeah! He’s got the strength of a mighty kraken and he’s not afraid of anything!” he grins. “I promise, he’ll always protect you!”
“I dunno, RoRo…sounds like a big promise.”
Roman thinks then gasps as if he remembered something and makes a crown shape with his hands, placing it over his head.
“I royal promise then! That way, he’ll never lose strength!” he grins wider, proudly even.
“Royal promise?” Remus tilts his head.
Roman nods.
“Yeah! It’s a strong promise because I made it with my prince powers!”
As Janus hears that, he jolts for a moment. Those words…royal promise…they sound so familiar and distant at the same time. A tiny part of him curses the twins for reminding him of the past so much. He wonders how Roman even remembered that. Maybe…no. It couldn’t be. That person is long gone. Still, Janus aches. He can still see him in the twins though. He says nothing and smiles fondly at them instead.
Meanwhile, Remus finally grins as he forgets the storm.
“Okay, I believe you, RoRo.”
“Yay! What are you gonna name him, by the way?”
Remus thinks then grins wider.
“Squishyboo!”
2.
When it came to being Creativity, the one thing the twins hated was how creative their minds got at night. Sure, they could dream of anything each night but sometimes their minds like to take the shadows from their thoughts and morph them into nightmares. Nightmares that seemed far too sick and twisted for even Remus’ already dark self. Nightmares that felt like a curse, repeating, and replaying all too vividly. Not even Roman’s creative light could save them both.
Remus’ nightmares often melded with his intrusive thoughts. The shadows would steal the darkest thoughts they could find and create an even darker dream. Dreams of desolate worlds. Dreams of war-torn kingdoms and abandoned castles. Dreams of silent rooms with colorless walls. Dreams of a lost friend and a broken family. Dreams of fallen princes and lost kings. Dreams of pain and screaming. It always led to Remus waking up with a terrified scream.
Roman’s nightmares liked to play tricks on him. Every dream would start nice and warm…but then it would slowly turn darker and darker until it became a nightmare. A warm, grassy field would slowly turn cold as the green melted away into brown. A bright castle with flickering, welcoming candles would slowly put its lights out one by one until darkness took over the whole palace. A Duke dancing about on stage would slowly grow pale until he collapsed, and the stage fell. A powerful king would slowly grow weaker and weaker until he falls apart, screaming in agony as he tears himself in half. It always left Roman waking up with a horrified sob.
Tonight isn’t any different. The twins had been put to bed by Janus as usual and were sleeping, sprawled out against each other. Due to the intensity of some of their nightmares and never wanting to be separate, they insisted on sharing a room. Janus let them, knowing how much they needed each other. Remus could hold Roman down when he’d started flailing and Roman could calm Remus down if a nightmare left him a bit lost. As Roman sleeps, his creative mind starts playing with his shadows.
Roman finds himself standing in a living room he doesn’t recognize. The living room he knows has dark grey walls with pictures of him and his brother and Janus on them. The floor he knows is a darker grey and has a soft, mustard yellow round rug in front of the tv. This living room is…bright and warm. The wallpaper is a light shade of beige, and the floor is an off-white with no rug.
He looks around and nearly jumps, seeing two figures staring back at him. He looks to his side and Remus is there, holding his hand. He seems upset. Roman doesn’t know and looks back at the figures. They seem to be talking warmly. Roman tries to step forward but finds he can’t move his legs. Oh. He swallows and looks around. He sees Janus standing by on Remus’ other side, head bowed.
“Janus?” Roman calls.
Janus looks up and Roman sees a sad, almost regretful look in his eyes.
“I’m so sorry…”
“What do you mean?”
Before Janus can say anything more, the two figures turn and step towards Roman. In the light of the living room, Patton stands with an unsettling grin, his eyes far too wide with excitement. Logan stands beside him with a blank look, dull eyes gazing at nothing. It makes Roman’s skin crawl.
“Okay, kiddos! Say your last goodbyes! We’ve decided to take Roman and keep him here!” Patton exclaims, tilting his head a little too much.
Roman jolts as the lights flicker.
“B-But what about Remus?” he asks.
Patton laughs and it’s almost ear piercing.
“Oh, don’t be silly, kiddo! Remus has been naughty. He can’t stay here. You don’t need him.”
“H-He’s my brother…what do you mean he can’t stay, and I don’t need him?” Roman whimpers.
Logan leans down and stares at Roman.
“Your brother is not fit to be with us. He is not needed here. Until we can…dispose of him, he will remain with Janus. We will dispose of him once you have been moved here, Roman.”
Roman’s eyes widened.
“A-Are…Are you splitting us…again?” he whispers.
Patton giggles and it seems even louder, his grin twitching.
“Just to be safe, kiddo!”
The room grows darker and Roman tries to move again but he still can’t. He turns towards Remus, reaching out for him.
“Remus!”
Remus tries to reach back only for Janus to grab him.
“Forgive me.” Janus whispers
And Remus goes limp in his arms.
Roman gasps in horror, pain spreading through him.
“No! Give my brother back! Give him back!”
Patton laughs again. He laughs and laughs and laughs. The sound rings and echoes.
“Now, now. Be a good prince, Roman.”
Roman desperately tries again and again to move, arms flailing out as he tries to reach out for Remus.
Janus just turns away with Remus in his arms before fading.
Patton’s laughs grow even louder and it’s making Roman’s ears start to ache. Logan stares at him again, a hand on Roman’s shoulder.
“He’s gone now, Roman.”
“No…No! Bring him back! I need him! I need—”
Roman gasps.
“-REMUS!”
Roman tries to move again but finds that even now he still can’t and flails around, a heavy weight on top of him.
“Let me go! I need to find him! I need Remus!” he whimpers.
“Easy, Ro! It’s me! It’s Remus!”
Roman blinks and his flailing slow to a stop as he squints in the dark. He sees a green blob and after another blink, he recognizes it as-
“Ree?”
Remus gets off of Roman and smiles softly.
“I’m right here, RoRo. I’m not going anywhere.” he replies.
Roman sits up and stares at Remus in the darkness of their shared room, the only source of light coming from their glow-in-the-dark star stickers on the ceiling. Blood red eyes stare back at him and Roman can’t help but launch himself into his twin’s arms.
“I don’t want you to go!” Roman wails.
Remus hugs back, patting his twin as he does.
“I’m not leaving, RoRo. I’m right here.”
Roman sniffs and hiccups at that, pulling away to gaze at his twin. He’s still there. He’s still awake. He’s not limp like in his dream or—
“RoRo?”
Roman hiccups again.
“T-They tried to split us. Again. Morality and Logic. I don’t want you to leave. I don’t want to lose you, Ree.” he whispers. “I don’t care if they think you’re bad. You’re my brother and I need you.”
Remus feels his heart ache. Is that what those light sides really think of him? Are they so cruel that they can’t let him be with Roman? He huffs and pouts, cupping Roman’s face and squishing it.
“Who cares what they think? They can’t keep us apart no matter what. Janus won’t let that happen either.”
“B-But my dream—”
“Is just a dream, dummy. No one will take me, and no one will keep us apart.”
Roman blinks and sniffs.
“P-Promise?”
Remus grins, letting go of Roman to form a crown above his head with his hands.
“I even royal promise, Ro.”
Remus then pulls his brother into another hug, glaring ahead. He’ll make sure no one ever splits them again. Especially not those two. He’ll shed blood if he has to.
Meanwhile, Roman’s sniffles slowly quiet down.
“Thank you, Ree.”
And Roman slips into a peaceful slumber this time, clinging onto Remus’ sleep shirt.
3.
They were split anyway. It wasn’t their choice, however. Morality decided that Roman needed to be with them in order for things to be more…balanced. That day, the Mindpalace split as well with the Light sides above and the Dark Sides being shoved down a little closer to the subconscious. Janus didn’t like the idea but there wasn’t anything else he could do. He tried to fight for the twins, but Morality insisted on this and of course, who did Thomas listen to more? Morality always did have more influence over everything.
Roman barely remembers the day of the Second Split. With time passing on, it’s becoming more and more of a blurry memory. He doesn’t know why and not even Logic will tell him. Still, Roman knows he feels incomplete. He doesn’t like being apart from Remus, but Morality is right, isn’t he? He’s a light side now and he must be good. And yet…Roman missed Remus.
Roman missed his twin. He missed giggling and playing with him. He missed having adventures with him and fighting off nightmares. It took so much time to get used to sleeping alone. He’d spend nights crying silently after every nightmare. He missed having someone to hold him down when he’d flail. Sure, Patton was…kind and he made warm milk, but he wasn’t Remus. Remus would always assure him that his dreams are just dreams. He’d tell him silly stories until he laughed his tears away. He’d hold him till he fell asleep.
So, Roman finds himself lying awake again as he wracks his brain. It’s been a year since the Second Split, and he can’t remember much of it. He’s still trying to make sense of it but refuses to believe that Remus and Janus were bad. Sighing, Roman sits up and glances at the door.
He wonders…
Before he can stop himself, Roman shrugs his blanket off and stands up from his bed.
“Need Remus…” he mumbles to himself.
Roman glances at his bedroom door before going over to the other side of his room. He has yet to decide where to put the door to his Imagination, so he summoned a portal instead. As long as he had no door, Patton couldn’t follow him in. This felt all wrong but Roman finds himself not caring all too much.
Roman then steps through and closes the portal behind him. The Imagination greets him with a cool, evening breeze. It makes Roman feel a little more at ease. He wishes he could sleep here but with his nightmares still intense, he didn’t want to risk them affecting his beloved world. Roman sighs and begins walking through the grassy field. Usually, he starts at the forest, but he didn’t feel like it tonight.
It feels calm and peaceful, walking through the sea of dark green. Fireflies even join in on his trek, lighting his way. Roman finds himself humming softly, tilting his head up to admire the twinkling stars he placed in the sky. Off in the distant sky, two bright stars glow side by side. One green and one red. Between them is one big golden star. Roman doesn’t recall making those but he adores them anyway.
Soon, Roman finds himself wandering further and further. Past the sleeping village and the castle. Over the rocky mountains behind the kingdom and across the river below them.
At the end, Roman finds himself walking towards the ravine that separated his side and Remus’. He remembers hearing the Mindpalace rumble on the day he and Remus were separated. When he returned to the Imagination, even this world had split in two. The twins had formed a bridge with a gazebo in the center where they could meet every day. The bridge was white on Roman’s side and black on Remus’. No one knew about this but Janus who kept quiet for their sake.
Roman walks towards the bridge and makes his way over, sighing as his hand finds the barrier that kept them apart. Neither twin could go over to each other, and it seemed Morality made sure of it. Roman sighs then…he hears something rustle on the other side. Had he been caught or—
“RoRo!”
From behind a bush and holding a baseball bat, Remus runs out and meets his twin at the barrier. He couldn’t sleep either and snuck out.
Roman gasps and grins, his hands meeting Remus’ as they pressed against the barrier.
“Ree! I missed you so much!”
“I missed you too, dummy.” Remus grins back before sitting in front of Roman. “So, how is it over there in the Light Side?”
Roman sighs and sits too.
“It doesn’t feel like home. There are too many rules and too much work. Morality and Logic are no fun either.” he huffs.
Remus tilts his head. Morality and Logic? Something didn’t seem right about this and his brother, but he decides not to question that for now.
“That’s sucky.” he says instead. “What kind of work are you doing? Do you still get to create stuff?”
Roman nods but then…he sighs again. Ever since he moved to the Light Sides against his will, he’d been losing more and more of his creative freedom. He’d been given rules to follow, filters to watch out for, and an unending mountain of drafts that he had to revise because the original just wasn’t good enough anymore.
“RoRo?”
Roman pulls away from his thoughts and shakes his head.
“Logic gave me a bunch of dumb rules to follow.” he huffs. “He says I have to get it approved by him and it has to be appropriate. So, I followed all the rules and he’s still being a butthead about it. I just can’t please him.”
Remus frowns and so badly wants to hold his brother. Or beat up Logan for making his brother sad. If he could, he’d do both now. For now, he places a hand on the barrier.
“Who cares what that boring towel thinks? He wishes he could create as good as you, Ro!” he exclaims. “Besides, I bet your stuff is still super cool and his eyeballs are just too broken to see it! He’s dumb!”
Roman snorts and giggles.
“Ree! He can’t be dumb, he’s logic!” he squeals.
Remus smiles. His brother looks so exhausted but at least he’s happy for now.
“Yeah, but he’s not creativity! He’s not the boss of what you create and how!” he giggles. “What about Morality?”
“He’s…okay. But not like Janus.” Roman replies once he’s calmed down. “He won’t let me have extra snacks and he keeps telling me everything I do isn’t princely like.”
Oh no.
Remus frowns and tilts his head.
“What do you mean?”
Roman pouts again and Remus hates what those jerks are doing to his brother.
“He has even more rules. It’s not princely like to be late to dinner or it’s not princely like to make inappropriate jokes. I didn’t even make a joke like that! It was just a fart joke!” he huffs.
“Then they’re both dumb and they don’t get us.” Remus also huffs. “If they want to be goody, goody babies then let them. You don’t have to let them boss you around.”
Roman sighs and leans against the barrier. If he leans hard enough, he could feel Remus’ hands.
“I guess…I don’t like it here, Ree. I don’t wanna be perfect. I just wanna be with you and Janus where everything made sense.” he mumbles.
Remus smiles sadly, wishing he could pet his brother’s hair. He knows Roman likes it when he does that. It’s very calming to both, surprisingly. He wishes his brother was back here too. Ever since his brother was taken, Janus has been sad and drinking a lot. Like a lot more than usual. Their space had grown quiet as well and nothing felt the same without his twin.
The dark creativity then gazed at his twin. Roman looked so tired. So exhausted. Even his eyes looked…less green than it used to be. It made Remus feel angry at the so-called light sides. Who were they to call themselves high and mighty while hurting someone they wanted to be as one of them? Remus feels his thoughts whispering to go up there and deal with them, but he knows Roman wouldn’t want that and he’s needed here more. So, he tells them unkindly to shut up and decides he’ll figure out a way to get his brother back. Even if it means kidnapping him.
“What?! Remus, you can’t kidnap me! Morality’s going to be mad, and he’ll never let me see you!” Roman exclaims, jolting his twin out of his thoughts.
Remus blinks.
“Huh?”
“You muttered that out loud.” Roman frowns. “Don’t kidnap me or do anything else, Ree. I don’t want them to separate us even more than we are now.”
Remus sighs.
“But…”
Roman places a hand on the barrier, giving Remus a pleading gaze.
“Please, Ree…I need you…”
Remus’ shoulders droop. His brother was right.
“Fine…” he sighs. “I just hate that we’re split like this. I miss you, Ro…”
Roman smiles softly.
“I miss you too, Ree. I promise I’ll find a way to bring us back.” he whispers.
Remus returns the soft smile.
“Royal promise?”
“I, Prince Roman, Royal promise.”
And Remus smiles more as Roman forms a crown above his head with his hand. As the twins talk the night away, the barrier weakens, and the ravine silently closes in a little.
4.
One day the barrier finally broke, and the twins could go to each other. The ravine stayed by their choice to keep their sides of the Imagination safe, but the bridge remained, its foundation stronger than ever. The twins also decided to keep this a secret, sneaking into their domains in the evening to meet at the bridge. They’d play in the evening then separated just before the sun came up.
Of course, as time passed, there were ups and downs. Fights and arguments. That didn’t break their bond even if they’d screamed at each other about hatred and despise. They would feel guilty at the end of the day anyways and would come running to each other to apologize.
They went through many more things. From Virgil changing sides suddenly to Roman being hurt by Janus and Remus introducing himself to the Light Sides officially. Of course, he and Roman had to put on an act to keep their secret, well, a secret. Janus and Virgil knew though.
Roman never really interacted with Virgil during his time with Remus and Janus. He saw him once in the kitchen and freaked out, running off. He still feels bad and wonders if that’s why Virgil was so snarky when they finally met.
When Remus had finally made himself known and went with the act that he and Roman rehearsed, he felt a little bad about whacking Roman in the head. As soon as the episode was done, they met in the Imagination and Roman let Remus triple check to make sure his brain was still there.
When Janus had gone too far with Roman, Roman had angrily burst into the Imagination and went on a rampage. Remus followed and calmed him down, helping him out of his spiral before they went to see Janus. One deep conversation later and things were on the mend. Or as mended as it could be.
Due to Roman’s time in the Light Side, he’d been getting worse and worse. He’d be far too busy these days and even much more exhausted. His costume had been growing baggier and baggier. His smile had become strained, almost fake. Tired. Worst of all, Roman grew quiet and serious. Remus didn’t like it one bit. They had changed his brother.
So, one day, Remus set out to the Imagination to go see his brother again. He had a bad feeling about him at the moment. Especially since he could feel some sort of pain twisting in his gut. It’s a blessing and a curse but ever since The Split, the twins had been able to feel each other’s pain no matter how big or small. Janus called it a twin bond or something. Remus hates how it makes him feel this constant dull throbbing from his brother. Roman hates how he feels nothing from Remus, envying how he didn’t have rules to follow or roles to play.
Remus keeps trekking on through the grass field, using his twin’s shortcut. It’s the dead of night both here and in the Mindscape so he’s not too worried about being caught. The Intrusive side sighs and gazes ahead, seeing the tiny lights of Roman’s little village off to the side, his bright and tall castle stands just above them. Actually, the castle seemed a little dimmer these days and it made Remus frown.
Sure, Remus could have gone through his own side but ever since he made himself known to the others, he stopped giving a fuck about the rule of where he was allowed to go. He’s even made it clear that he could go where he damn well pleases. Especially since he’s had enough of them splitting him and Roman. This led to Remus finally barging into Roman’s room to check on him, only to find his door to the Imagination left open. So, Remus followed and here he was.
Remus then continues walking through the village, feeling a bit uneasy from the silence. Sure, it may be evening, and the people are asleep in their homes but not even the cicadas and the crickets were singing their songs. It made the whole place feel…dead. The Imagination has always been in tune with the twins’ emotions and lately Roman hasn’t been feeling his best. It seems the Imagination knew that. Even the little patches of grass and weeds drooped downwards into the dirt as if they hung in their heads in sorrow.
Remus shakes his head.
“Oh, Roman…”
The Duke continues on, heading up the path and past the homes of the nobles. Through one of the windows, Remus could see a family gathered together at the table for dinner. At least they were happy. It made Remus want to gag as he tears his gaze away, hurrying towards the golden gates. The guards there merely turned before looking away. It seems they were also worried for their prince.
“Yeah…I know how you guys feel.” Remus mutters as he walks through. “I…I’ll talk to him.”
The guards nod in return and Remus continues on. The Intrusive side then walks up the path and through the gate, making his way through the courtyard. There’s no sign of anyone. Not even a single noble or a maid around the fountains. It’s unusually quiet and it surprisingly disturbs Remus. Sighing, Remus continues on his way and enters the main doors. Somehow, it’s even quieter inside. There’s usually so much going on that Remus refuses to take the front entrance and prefers to bust through the window. Today, however, no one is around here either. At least, Remus thinks so.
Remus wanders through the foyer and towards the throne, pausing when he finds the doors left ajar. Usually, they’re left wide open for Roman’s people to come see him when he’s at his throne. It makes the Duke hum in worry as he enters cautiously, wondering what his little brother had done to them…and to himself. Breathing out and ignoring the intrusive voices in his head, Remus enters the throne room and finds-
“Mama?”
“Remus. I’m glad you’re here, dear.”
Maleficent. The Dragon Witch and Roman’s so-called enemy. Every now and then she’d fly over the village, pretending to attack and Roman would save the day. Maleficent, or Mal for short, was always happy to play her role to see Roman happy. Roman worried about hurting her too much but was always assured that she could take his hits. Mal would continue to do fake battles and when she wasn’t, she lived in her tower up in the far mountains of Roman’s realms.
Mal also acted like a mother figure for the twins in return for them saving her life after the split. She was going to vanish along with The King who had named her after the character from Sleeping Beauty, but the twins chose to save her. In return, Mal became their guardian and caretaker. Their mother. She would be the one watching over them for her fallen king, making sure they were safe whenever they visited the realm.
Remus ambles over and greets her.
“You never show up in the throne room, mama. What are you doing here?” he asks.
“Something didn’t feel right so I came over to check on Roman. I must have scared the people away when I arrived.” Mal explains. “I tried to talk to your brother, but he won’t even answer to me.”
Remus sighs, a hand on his chest.
“I can feel his pain. It…It hurts so much…” he mutters.
Mal sighs.
“I know, little one. His realm…it’s just as sorrowful.” she shakes her head before gazing at one of the stained glass windows. “Roman told me he was going up to the tower. Hopefully he’s still there and he’ll talk to you.”
Remus nods, blinking away his tears before they could fall.
“I’ll take care of him, mama.” he promises.
Mal smiles softly.
“I know you will, my dear. And please, make sure you take care of yourself too. You look tired.”
Remus sighs but manages a small smile.
“I will.” he nods. “You should go before the people come back to capture you, mama.”
Mal kisses Remus’ forehead before the mother figure turns and makes her leave. Remus watches her go before turning towards the throne, making his way over to it. It’s golden shine had dulled out and the soft, velvet fabric looks as if it had been picked at. Remus stares at it for a moment, wondering what Roman really felt like even as he sat upon his throne. Roman always boasted about being the best prince and it seemed no one knew or even cared to see how much work that took. It’s strange to see it completely empty. When Roman visits his realm, he always stops by the throne room whenever he can. When the prince wasn’t in, the nobles and castle staff would be roaming about as the guards stood by.
Rubbing at his face, Remus leaves the throne room and climbs the stairs. He still doesn’t like the heavy silence following him down the corridor and up the next flight of stairs. Several more staircases later and Remus soon arrives at the door to the tower. Roman often hides away here to be alone or to talk to Remus. The tower had been given a spell to ensure that only Mal and the twins could enter whenever they liked. Remus feels lucky that he’s able to enter and lets himself in.
“Ro? Mama told me you were here. She said you were hiding up again.” Remus calls.
“Out here, Ree.” Roman calls back a moment later from the balcony.
Remus breathes out a sigh of relief and heads over to where his twin is. He goes through the curtains and finds Roman leaning over the parapet of the tower. Roman looks exhausted, the bags under his eyes almost as dark as Virgil’s eyeshadow. Remus comes over, copying his twin and staring at him for a moment before deciding to talk.
“Um…hi, Ro…what are you doing up here?” Remus starts.
Roman doesn’t move, gazing at the hills far in the distance.
“If you think I’m going to jump. I’m not. I’m just…thinking. I guess.”
“Oh.” Remus blinks. “I wasn’t going to say anything about that. At least not now. I just wanted to talk.”
Roman manages an empty chuckle.
“Heh, funny. You usually prefer to swing first, talk later. Did you accidentally swing at yourself, Dukey?”
Remus shakes his head and sighs.
“No. I just really miss my brother. As annoying as he is, I like having him around as the dumb, sparkly, prince he is.”
“I…I don’t know. I don’t feel sparkly. Probably just dumb.”
Remus blinks then stands up straight and turns Roman to face him.
“Okay, Ro-Bro, look. You’re clearly not okay right now. Talk to me. Tell me what’s got your brain being a bitch. That’s what I’m here for, okay?”
Roman stares at Remus, a tear falling down his cheek.
“Ree…”
“Talk to me, RoRo. It’s okay.”
Another tear rolls down Roman’s cheek and-
“It hurts, Ree…”
Remus brings Roman to the stone bench behind him and sits them both down.
“What hurts, Ro?”
“Everything. No matter what I do, I can’t please them. I can’t make Patton happy. I can’t satisfy Logan’s demands. What good am I? What kind of Creativity am I?”
Remus feels his heart throb in pain. Roman is hurting so, so much. It makes Remus wonder what those light-side idiots are doing to him. Sure, Remus has seen Roman hanging around them and being friendly with them but…in return they hurt Roman. Do they even realize what they’re doing to Roman? Probably not. It pisses Remus off, but he swallows his anger for another day. Instead, the Duke turns to Roman and wipes his tears.
“You know what? Fuck them. Fuck those light side bitches.”
Roman gasps.
“Ree!”
Remus grins.
“Who cares what they say about you or what they think? You are Prince Roman, and you don’t need their goddamn approval.” he ruffles Roman’s hair.
“B-But I- “
“But nothing! Well, except for my butt. Anyways, fuck them. If they don’t want to give a shit about you. You don’t have to give a shit about them.”
Roman manages a small smile.
“I guess…that’s true, Ree.” he then sighs, and that small smile disappears. “I’m just scared. What if they don’t want me anymore? What if they get rid of me or hate me?”
“Woah, there, Ro. Let’s get you off that spiral coaster, yeah? Even if that does happen, you’ve always got me. I’m not leaving you. No matter how big of a bitch you can get.”
Roman finally giggles a bit.
“Hey! You’re annoying too, dummy!”
“Yeah, but you’ll be stuck with me at least.” Remus grins.
Remus feels the weight on his chest start to lighten. Good.
“I think I’ll be okay with that. Promise you’ll be there to catch me?” Roman asks.
Remus hums then grins, forming a crown symbol above his head using his hands.
“I, Duke Remus, royal promise.”
“Remus…” Roman’s eyes widen then he lunges forward and hugs him. “Thank you…”
Remus smiles and hugs back.
“Of course, dumbass.”
The twins stay like that for a while before…
“So…would you mind if I just…talked to the others?”
“Ree, no!”
“Eh, worth a shot.”
5.
Despite being all grown up now, Remus’ nightmares have not changed. It seems more like they’ve grown darker and more vivid. Sometimes it was hard to tell what wasn’t real and what was actually happening. It was easy to lose himself in the darkest visions of his sleeping mind. It was harder to find the way out with no Roman to save him. Sure, Janus was there, doing his best to keep him afloat but he could only keep the nightmares at bay for a little while. They’d come back every other night, darker than ever. It’s a miracle that Remus gets any sleep, really. Sometimes, the duke is often found sleeping in odd places, napping excessively in the afternoon when he isn’t causing chaos.
Today isn’t any different. Remus had wanted to do some art to quiet his mind of the annoying loud voices he keeps hearing. He had just finished his third piece as he started growing sleepy. He then soon fell asleep at his table before he could sign his artwork, paintbrush rolling out of his hand as he snoozed away.
When Remus blinks his eyes open, he finds himself standing in the Imagination. Yet, it’s not his own realm that he’s in. He looks around and finds that he’s in a village. A torn emblem of a red shield flutters beside an abandoned tavern. This is…Roman’s village? Remus shivers and looks towards the castle. A shadowy black haze surrounds it, looking more menacing than the blood red sky above it. Yet, that’s not the terrifying part. No, the true horror is that this is what became of Roman’s realm.
But…why?
Remus shudders and carries on, searching for his twin. Maybe he just wanted to try something different? Yeah, that’s gotta be it. He walks through the silent village and up the path to the town square where the nobles’ house are. No one’s here either. Remus glances at an open window. He only sees an empty table. Where had everyone gone? Roman loved his people too much so there’s no way he’d gotten rid of them.
Remus walks on and up the castle path and through rusted gates, passing wilted grass and dried fountains. The courtyard looked more like…a cemetery now. Funnily enough and ironically, Remus isn’t thrilled about this. Roman’s realm is supposed to be stupidly bright and annoyingly glittery like the prince himself. Remus just finds all of this to look completely wrong.
Soon Remus enters the castles, the grand doors opening with a heavy groan. The foyer is empty and dim with the only lighting coming from the glass windows and the little torches on the wall. Remus steps in, shivering again as he’s greeted by cold air. Usually, Roman’s castle is warm and welcoming. This is just haunting. Maybe it’s a bit cliché to Remus but he reminds himself that this Roman’s place and it shouldn’t be this dark and cold.
“R-Ro?” Remus calls out.
The only reply is the echo of his own voice.
Remus pushes on, still calling for Roman. His voice echoes back and he worries more. What if Roman was gone too? What if something happened to him? What if he-Remus stops that thought and carries on. Roman has to be okay. He’s dumb but he’s brave. Yeah, Roman’s a big, brave Prince. Remus tells himself he’s probably just hanging out somewhere or up in the tower again. Maybe he’s in the throne room, doing his royal duties. That has to be it.
So, the duke enters the throne room and looks towards the throne and-oh. There’s Roman sitting there and…not moving. Why isn’t he moving? Why isn’t he blinking? Remus slowly makes his way towards the throne, hoping his footsteps would alert his twin. Still…Roman doesn’t move. He remains frozen. His face does not change. His eyes do not twitch. Remus places a hand on his chest only to feel…nothing. No weight, no pain, no aches. There is nothing there.
“Roman? It’s me. It’s Ree.”
Roman says nothing.
Remus steps forward, moving closer and closer to the throne. Under the light from the stained glass windows, he could see that the throne had rusted and its velvet fabric was now torn. Odd. He remembers the throne being shinier and cleaner than this. Had it been so long since the last time he visited Roman? Had he forgotten to see him? Remus knows he hadn’t. He visits Roman as much as he can, constantly bothering him even as he tries to get his work done. When did this happen then? Remus swallows and finds himself right at Roman’s throne.
“Hey, RoRo? Can you hear me? I’m right here. It’s Ree!” Remus calls.
Still no answer…
Then the window on the left swings open with a gust of wind and the curtains fly off. Remus watches them flutter down to the floor in a heap and a little more light floods the room. It trails across the floor and lands perfectly on Roman’s face. Roman’s face had turned to stone. Horrified, Remus runs up to his brother and looks at his brother closer in the light. It wasn’t just his face. His whole body had turned to stone, face frozen with a broken expression. Remus had been too late.
“R-RoRo?”
Remus pats his face.
Nothing happens.
“RoRo, this isn’t a funny prank! Wake up, dumbass! Wake up!” Remus cries.
Still, nothing happens.
Remus shakes his head, smacking Roman over and over as he could chip away the stone to find him underneath.
“Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Roman, please!”
Sure, Remus had imagined scenarios of hurting his brother, but he never wanted him gone.
“Come on, little brother! You can stop now! It’s not funny! Wake up!”
Remus slams his fists against the stone, not caring about the pain that follows after.
“Please, wake up!”
Tears fall from Remus’ face and land on Roman’s head as he screams-
“ROMAN!”
Remus shoots up from where he’s sitting, his stool falling over as he stumbles backwards. Wide, red eyes dart around in search of his twin. He’s not here though and Remus wanders out of his art room, muttering his brother’s name. He has to be here somewhere. He has to be okay. Remus looks around some more, checking around the living room. No prince there. Remus makes his way towards the door to the corridor that leads to the light sides.
“Remus? Is that you? I heard you screaming. Is everything alright?”
Janus comes down from the other corridor that goes to the bedrooms, worry on his face when Remus doesn’t respond.
“Remus?”
Remus opens the door.
“Need to find him. Find Roman.”
Janus sighs. This wasn’t the first time this happened. He’s usually able to snap him out of it but Remus seems really lost this time.
“Remus, I’m sure Roman is okay. We saw him this morning.”
Remus shakes his head.
“Need to find Roman.”
Janus sighs once more, going over to Remus as he wonders what nightmare he had this time.
“Alright, we’ll go find Roman.”
With that, Janus and Remus leave the Dark Side and make their way through the cold corridor that separates the two sides. Janus hates this place and how freezing it is, how it came to divide them. He wraps his cloak around himself and follows Remus through to the light side, feeling a bit relieved when they’re greeted by the warmth of the Light Side. Janus refuses to admit that he prefers it over the Dark Side’s coldness. The snake side then turns to Remus.
“Okay, Remus, shall we check your brother’s room?”
Remus walks on.
“Find Roman. Find him.” he repeats in a mutter.
Poor thing.
Remus ambles up the stairs, Janus making sure he doesn’t trip. The others are out so Janus isn’t too worried about running into them. They make their way past the room doors and find Roman’s, its star nameplate shining under the light. A big cursive ‘R’ is in the center of it. Of course. Without hesitation, Janus knocks for Remus and a moment later the door opens to reveal Roman with his hair a mess and a pencil tucked behind his ear.
“What is-Janus? What are you doing here?” Roman asks.
Janus steps aside and Remus blinks before he goes up to his twin, snapping out of his trance.
“R-Roman? Is this…are you real?” Remus whispers.
Roman, realizing his twin had another nightmare, nods and takes his twin’s hand. He places it on his chest so Remus can feel his heartbeat.
“I’m real, Ree. I’m okay. I’m right here.”
As soon as he feels the thumping of his brother’s heart, Remus tackles Roman into a tight hug.
“I thought…I thought you were gone!” Remus wails.
Roman squeezes his brother, squishing him in the hug as much as he can. It’s how his twin likes it.
“Shh, I’m here, Ree. Whatever you saw, it wasn’t real and I’m not going anywhere, okay?”
“B-But in my dream your kingdom was all dark and when I went to see you, you were turned to stone…You didn’t move or talk, and I thought...” Remus sniffs and cries again.
Roman pats his brother’s back, heart aching at the sight of his twin breaking down. He’s usually the more carefree one between them, not caring about anything. Seeing him now like this is just sad.
“Hey, your dream is just a dream, remember? What’s real is you and me and Janus and the whole Mindscape. I’m not going anywhere, and I mostly certainly am not turning to stone.” he soothes his twin.
Remus’ cries quiet down to sniffles.
“R-Royal promise? You won’t leave or do something that stupid? You’ll be here forever and ever?”
“Royal promise, brother.” Roman smiles softly, forming the crown above his head.
Remus hugs Roman again at that, rubbing his tears away.
“Thanks, Ro. You better not tell Virgil I was crying like a little bitch.” he sniffs one last time, letting go of his twin moments later.
Roman huffs a laugh.
“I won’t, Ree.”
As Remus lets himself be comforted by the assurance that Roman is right there, Janus smiles fondly off to the side and ignores the ache in his heart again.
+1
For a long time now, Janus had watched the twins make Royal Promises to each other. These promises were very important to them both, so they were very careful as to when they made it. A Royal Promise carried a lot of weight and pain behind it after all. The pain came from the promise being broken. The twins never ever break a Royal Promise.
The only problem is that the twins don’t know why they started doing that. Roman just felt it was stronger than a regular promise, so he did it Remus, ever curious and always following his twin, copied Roman. It became their little ritual and it was very rare that they let any of the others try to do what they do. Besides, Roman made up a rule that you have to be royal to make one.
Sighing, Janus glances at the twins. They were currently play-wrestling in the field just down the hill from where the snake side was lounging under the King’s Tree. He smiles fondly as he hears them laugh and tumble around the tall grass. Despite the rough times, Janus is glad their bond has remained strong. No matter how many times the others had tried, they refused to let anyone separate them. Sometimes, he wonders if they’ll ever…Janus puts a stop to that thought. Even if the twins could, Janus wouldn’t force them to re-fuse. They seem happier this way.
“Having fun, boys?” Janus calls, chuckling as he sees them pop up together with grass in their hair and stains on their outfits.
“Yeah! We’re wrestling for who gets the leftover spaghetti in the fridge!” Remus answers back, jumping onto Roman’s back.
“You had it last week though!” Roman giggles.
“Yeah, but I want some and Virgey can make you more!”
The twins go back to wrestling for a second as Janus huffs a laugh.
“Okay, you two. Come sit down and take a break first. You’ve been wrestling all afternoon.” he calls, the leaves rustling above as if to call the twins over as well.
The twins giggle and race each other over, plopping under the cool shade of the branches. A nice breeze blows and starts to cool them down. It seems as if the Imagination always knew what they needed.
“I totally won the wrestling match.” Remus grins.
“Excuse me, I pinned you down more than you got me!” Roman puffs in pride.
“Nuh uh!”
Janus laughs again.
“How about you both win the wrestling match and I’ll convince Patton to let me make spaghetti for dinner tonight?” he offers, not wanting them to actually start a fight.
The twins gasp and nod eagerly.
“Yes!”
Janus smiles softly.
“Excellent.”
Silence falls in as the three relax under the afternoon shade. It’s nice and peaceful and Janus would do anything to stay here forever. No problems. No pain. Just him and the happy twins he promised he’d protect. His promise…Janus remembers when he made the very first Royal Promise…to his King. He wonders if the King knows how hard he’d been fighting to keep that promise. How he failed and went through hell and back to make up for it. For the King. For the twins. For-
“Janus?”
Janus blinks out of his thoughts and looks over to see Roman sitting up, frowning at him in concern and Remus copying his twin.
“Are you okay, Janus?” Roman asks.
“You were really spacing out, snakey.” Remus adds.
Janus sighs and nods.
“I’m alright. I’m just…” he glances up at the tree. “I’m just thinking about an old friend…and promises.”
Roman tilts his head in confusion.
“Promises? Like Royal promises?”
Janus chuckles softly.
“Yes. How did you know?”
“I saw you looking upset while I was hugging Remus and making my Royal promise to him.” Roman replies, smiling bashfully. “Did…Did we do something wrong?”
Janus’ heart aches and he shakes his head.
“No, not at all. It just reminds me of my old friend. The King.” he answers, smiling softly as the tree rustles again.
“The King?” Remus chimes in, sitting up as well.
Janus nods, smile now fond.
“Yes…” he answers, gazing at the twins. Sometimes he sees his old friend in them. “I made the first Royal Promise to him.”
The twins’ eyes widen. All those years of not knowing where the Royal Promise came from…and Janus made the first one to the King. Curiosity grows and the twins move closer to Janus, wanting to know more of the King they once were.
“What was the promise?” Roman asks.
“It was a promise I didn’t think I’d ever have to make. Today, however, I don’t regret making it.” Janus answers. “It was just before the split…”
This is it. King Romulus knew what was going to happen next. He didn’t think it would ever happen to him. He didn’t think Morality would actually go through with it. Yet, Thomas is changing and growing. His view on this world and what he feels is changing as well. Morality is afraid and Thomas seems to believe he knows best, so Romulus had no power here. What could he say to Thomas who seemed so afraid of who he was going to become?
Romulus quickly makes his way down the palace corridor. He had called for his closest and most trusted friend to spend one last day with him. He wanted Janus to have one last good memory before they had to say goodbye. Smiling to himself, Romulus makes his way to the throne room and steps in. He finds Janus waiting by his throne.
“Janus, I’m glad you made it.”
Janus looks up from where he’s staring at the throne.
“Romulus. You called me, old friend?” the young side asks, coming over to him. “Has it happened? Are you…?”
Romulus chuckles and shakes his head.
“Not yet. We still have some time before I have to see Morality tomorrow.”
“I wish we had more time. I wish this didn’t have to happen.” Janus huffs. “I don’t want you to go.”
Romulus smiles sadly.
“Neither of us can do anything to stop Morality. We’ve tried. Thomas won’t listen to us. All we can do is accept and adapt to change.”
Janus huffs again, rolling his eyes.
“You’re much nicer than I am.”
Romulus chuckles, patting Janus’ head. Janus was always shorter than his friend. Oddly, he’ll miss the head pats.
“If I could keep myself glued together, I would. I would tape and super glue and suture me to myself if I could.”
“I wish you could. So, what did you want to do with your short time left?” Janus asks, heart aching at that question.
Romulus smiles, offering his hand.
“I want to spend time with you, old friend. One last time.”
Janus sighs then smiles, taking Romulus’ hand.
“Alright, my King.”
King Romulus laughs and tugs Janus along at that. He brings Janus to his garden first. It was one of their favorite spots in the castle to run away to when life was stressful or when Morality’s pressure was too much, and Logic was being harsh. Romulus knows that they mean well but wish they were just a bit more understanding. He knew they had problems of their own and seemed to prefer to repress them rather than bring it to the meeting table.
The garden ended up being Janus and Romulus’ private getaway from it all. It was peaceful and there were always birds singing up in the trees. The air smelled like roses and fresh strawberries. Romulus loved strawberries. There was also a hint of nightshade. Romulus did love to experiment with strange things from time to time. In the center is an open dome that doubled as an observatory and the sun streamed down perfectly on the viewing deck.
Janus and Romulus end up spending all morning picnicking on the deck and chatting. They talked about Romulus’ recent experiments, trying not to think about how that would be his last. They have tea and cake and candy snacks, Romulus telling stories about his last adventure and Thomas’ recent dream. It felt like a regular morning, but Janus couldn’t help but feel heavy as the seconds ticked away. He knew what was coming soon and couldn’t stop thinking about it. Romulus knew it too but chose to ignore it. He focused on making his last day with Janus the best day he could give him.
After a morning of garden strolling, chatting, and tea, Romulus took Janus out of the castle. Janus watched as Romulus strolled through his little kingdom, waving hello to his servants and maids. To his guards. To the nobles and the village people. Janus desperately wanted to tell them what was going to happen to their king, but they wouldn’t understand. It makes Janus wonder if the people were going to one day wonder where their king had gone. Or would the kingdom and its people just…
“Janus, come on!”
Janus hurries along.
“Coming, Romulus!”
Janus follows Romulus through the village, watching him interact with the tavern owner. The owner nods and walks into his little tavern. Moments later, the man steps back out and hands Romulus a basket as he bows. Romulus thanks the tavern with a handful of gold before waving Janus over to follow. Janus follows along, wondering what’s in the basket. It smells wonderful and it takes Janus’ mind off of the heavy weight for a moment.
Soon, they exit the village and take a long, winding road through the tall grass field. Janus remembers watching Romulus hunting for bugs and rabbits and frogs when they were much younger. He follows Romulus and wishes the sun wouldn’t go any lower. Not yet. They climb a big hill, and a golden apple tree waits at the top. Janus had helped Romulus grow it a long time ago, calling it their special hiding place that they could go to when they couldn’t hide in the garden. Romulus said he’d bring everyone here one day but…Janus knew it would never happen. Janus didn’t want to bring anyone else here. Not when they would be taking his friend away.
“Janus, are you going to just stand there or are you going to come join me?”
Janus blinks out of his thoughts and sees Romulus sitting on the wooden throne that he made for himself years ago. In front of him is a matching table with the basket on top and a matching chair. Smiling shyly, Janus sits on the other chair and watches as Romulus leans forward to open the basket. The Creative side takes out two wrapped meals and a small jug of grape juice. He then sets the table, putting out the meals and pouring the juice. Once it’s ready, Romulus nods at Janus.
“Go on, Janus. I asked for your favorite.” The king says.
They unwrap their food and Janus is surprised yet touched to see that Romulus brought him some deviled eggs. Silence falls in as they both eat their meals, the sun setting ever so slowly. It makes Janus wish he could freeze time just a little longer. Sometimes he wished he could even turn back time or convince Thomas that everything was alright and that there was nothing wrong with who he was. Yet, Janus knows it’ll never happen. It’s too late now.
Soon, the sun is even lower, and the sky is a mix of reds and oranges and pinks. Romulus and Janus have finished their meals. The table was cleaned up and vanished along with the chair. The wooden throne remained but the two chose to sit on the grass as they watched the sunset. Neither said anything but knew that as soon as the sun was gone, their time together would be ending soon. It brings back that heavy weight from earlier inside Janus’ heart and he glances at the King.
“I wish time wouldn’t move so fast.” Janus sighs.
Romulus chuckles, watching the sun dip lower.
“You’d think as someone in charge of this entire realm, I’d be able to do that. Believe me, I wish I could, Janus.” he answers, waving his hand.
Nothing happens much to both of their disappointment, and they sit in silence again before-
“Janus…may I ask you for one last favor?” Romulus asks a moment later, sitting up on his knees.
Janus turns, mirroring Romulus.
“What is it, my King?”
Romulus removes his crown, placing it in Janus’ hands.
“When I am split, and I am replaced…will you take care of whoever takes my place?” he asks.
Janus’ eyes widen as he gazes at the crown in his shaking hands then at Romulus who’s calmly smiling at him.
“W-What? You want me to…are you sure? Why?” he stammers.
“Because I trust you. Thomas may no longer see you as Self Preservation as much as he used to, but I still do. I need you to promise me you will guide them and protect them.”
“I don’t know if I can…”
Romulus smiles softly.
“You can. Why don’t we make it a Royal Promise?” he suggests.
“R-Royal Promise? What is that?” Janus asks.
Romulus takes the crown and holds it above the yellow side’s head.
“A strong promise that is guaranteed to be never broken. If it is, the one who made it will be in pain until they fix it. I know it sounds like it’s meant for royals so today, you’re an honorary royal, Janus.” he explains.
Janus sniffs, a tear rolling down over his scales.
“Y-You really trust me?”
“Of course I do, my dear friend.” Romulus nods.
Janus looks at his King, knowing he would never see him here again and nods. Whoever becomes the new Creativity, Janus will make sure they won’t be lost to Morality again. So, Janus holds the crown over his head and smiles tearfully at Romulus as the sun vanishes below the horizon.
“I, Janus Sanders, Royal Promise, my King.”
“And when you both manifested, I did my best to keep that promise. Sure, I had my failures, but I intended to keep it for as long as I can, wanting to make sure I didn’t lose you both either.” Janus finishes.
The twins are quiet before Remus tackles Janus into a hug. Roman follows a moment later. They’re both glad Janus took them in. Sure, Morality was…kind and doing his best to look after them but Janus just understood them better. Now, they knew why.
“Thank you, Janus. For that.” Remus whispers.
Roman sniffles and nods.
“Yes, thank you. For keeping us safe. For telling us this.”
The twins then pull away, Remus rubbing his face to get rid of the tears.
“Would it be okay if we kept making Royal Promises? We’ll only use it for important things.” Roman asks.
Janus nods, wiping Roman’s tears away.
“Of course, Roman. It was always yours and Remus’ to make whenever you need it.”
Before Roman can thank Janus, the tree rustles and an apple falls from the branches into Janus’ hands.
Janus chuckles, smiling up at the tree as the twins gaze in surprise.
“Thank you, old friend. I assure you, I’m still keeping my Royal Promise.”
This time, as the sun sets, Janus sits with twins and smiles. As long as he was here, they wouldn’t be going anywhere. They would never be separate, and they would be safe under his guidance. Promise or not, Janus intends to make sure Creativity would stay strong. Even as two halves. It’s his royal promise to the King and the twins after all.
THE END
#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#janus sanders#roman sanders#remus sanders#roman sanders angst#remus sanders angst#patton sanders#logan sanders#virgil sanders#ts fics#tw nightmares#tw thunderstorms#unintentionally u!sides#tw slight u!sides#u!patton#u!logan#creativitwins angst
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Something about unsympathetic!Patton moxiety just, idk it just hits different, doesn't even need to be romantic. I just love that dynamic
Patton just absolutely emotionally manipulating him, professional guilt tripper and ghastligther.
He just sees this emotionally vulnerable/unsure kid, questioning if he's a good person or not, with a messy relationship with the closest thing to family he has, and just a whole lot of other things, and goes "I could abuse the hell out of that sucker"
Moxiety typically isn't typically for me (outside of platonic/familial) but this! I like this
#idk i saw some unsympathetic! Patton stuff recently and I just love Virgil and his dynamic#sander sides#ts virgil#tss virgil#virgil sanders#tss patton#patton sanders#u!patton#tw unsympathetic patton#unsympathetic patton#idk man i see a toxic relationship and go wild
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SaSi Prinxiety Week 2/7: Feathered Fallacies
Prompt: Feathered Wings
Tags: @prinxietyweek
Synopsis: [Fallacy (noun): A false or mistaken idea.] Logan does an experiment incorrectly. To put it simply, Roman accidentally gains a pair of silky white wings. Virgil's simping over- I mean admiring how hot the Prince looks with them.
Relationships: Romantic Prinxiety
Characters: Brief Appearance Logan, Roman, Virgil
TW: Small panic attack, Remus being mentioned
~
“Erm…. Logan?”
Logan sat at his desk, working on schedules. He looked up as he heard Roman call his name. “Yes, Roman?” He called back, taking a sip of his coffee- was it actually wine? Who knew.
Roman paced outside the door. “We’ve got a problem!”
Logan leaned back in his chair, raising an eyebrow. “Which is?”
“It’s better if I show you.”
Logan stood up, adjusting his tie and glasses. What in the world could be so important? He unlocked the door, it open. He pauses mid-movement, looking Roman up and down.
“Roman, how on Earth did you manage to gain wings?”
Roman crossed his arms with a huff. “Gee, teach, I wonder. Think about it for a second.”
What- Oh.
Logan internally cringed. “You were nearby when I was working with those chemicals, weren’t you.”
Roman have him a look that clearly meant that he was. “No shit, Sherlock! Fix this right now!”
Roman’s newly gained wings lay folded against his back, the feathers a dove white. They were fairly large, though not large enough to be considered an issue fitting through doors. They were rather beautiful, Logan had to admit, although the princely side clearly wasn’t enjoying it much.
Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is why I specifically state that nobody is to come near my house when I’m working with chemicals.”
Roman shrugged. “Patton said you might have an extra jar of Crofter’s! I ran out!”
“Terrible excuse.” The blue tied side summoned a clipboard and a pen. “Now, about your issue…” he scribbled a few things down before continuing. “I’m unsure if there is a cure I can conjure this very second. I’ll get back to you when I find one.” Logan went to close the door, but Roman placed a hand on the doorknob.
“What do I do in the meantime? If Remus finds out they’re about to be fried chicken wings.”
Logan thought about it for a moment. “Go to Virgil.” He forcefully closed the door this time, relocking it.
Roman groaned in frustration. “Damn you, scientific laws of the Mind Palace!!”
“I heard that!”
“Oh shi-“
~
“Virgil, stop petting them.”
Virgil ran another hand over the soft and fluffy feathers. “No,” he concluded, “I will not.”
“You’re acting like a five year old right now!”
“Okay, well you’re the one who decided not to listen to Logan!”
Roman felt a shiver run down his spine as Virgil continued to run his hands along the wings.
It wasn’t very often that Virgil was interested in things. But these wings? The greatest thing he’d seen his whole life. Period.
“So you can feel this?” He asked.
Roman was not about to admit he was enjoying this. “Sure can, emo. Can you stop that? I don’t like it.”
Virgil raised an eyebrow with a smirk. “Your face says otherwise, you royal pain in the ass.”
The prince blushed, scoffing. "Does not!"
Virgil rolled his eyes. "Okay, okay, fine." he removed his hand from the feathery limb. "There, are you happy now?"
Roman stared at him. "No." He grabbed Virgil's wrist gingerly, placing his palm back onto his wings. "Keep going."
"You confuse me."
"Just shut up and do it!"
The two sat in silence as Virgil continued to pet Roman's wings.
"They're very pretty," Virgil mused after a while, examining the feathers, "What the hell was Logan even doing that day?"
"I have no idea." Roman adjusted his sash, brushing off any possible dirt or lint that could have gotten on it. "I did see Remus at the door, saying something about 'cephalopods' and tentacles, but that was it."
Virgil hummed in response. "Your wings need to stretch," he concluded, standing up, "They look tense."
"Oh! Okay." Roman stood up as well, observing Virgil's room. Very emo. Just like him. "Shall we head to the Imagination, then?"
"You want me to come with you?" Virgil looked confused.
Roman gave him a soft look. "You're the only side I trust with this right now and Logan's busy. Patton would probably die from cuteness overload, Janus is Janus, and Remus- well, I don't want to become fried chicken."
Virgil snickered. "You got that right. They'd probably taste like glitter."
"Haha, very funny." Roman playfully nudged him in the side. "Now come on! I can sink us out!" He placed his hands on the purple-clad side's shoulders and sunk them out.
Virgil shrieked, not expecting the sudden change of gravity. He latched onto Roman, as he randomly shot out any curse he could think of.
It was certainly different than sinking into Thomas' house.
"Woah, are you okay, Virge?"
Virgil's breathing was rather heavy as he clung onto the prince from the side. "HOLYSHITDON'TFUCKINGDOTHATTOMEAGAINOFISWEARTOGOD-"
“Hey, hey! Breathe.” Roman brought him into a hug, rubbing soothing circles on his back. “4, 7, 8. Remember?” His tone was hushed, soft and caring. “Breathing is good for you, yeah?”
“We’re imaginary you- you dipshit.” Virgil was surprised he even managed to get that sentence out. His chest was tight and gee, was he shaking.
“Focusing on breathing, my prince.” Roman supplied, holding him in a gentle embrace, “you can cuss me out later.”
Roman helped Virgil sit on the ground next to him, keeping a protective arm around him. They were quiet as Virgil focused on his breathing.
The sides sat on a grassy hill, surrounded by flowers. The Imagination’s castle was in the distance, it’s winding and tall towers looking small from their spot.
Roman carefully opened his wings for the first time, being surprised at how big they really were. They looked much smaller folded, he decided. He tried flapping them very slowly as if he already knew how to use them.
Virgil had become much calmer by then, and watching intently.
Roman gave him a bright smile. “I have to admit, they are rather cool.”
“They really are..” Virgil cuddled up to Roman’s side, smiling. “I’m kind of sad I have to see them go.”
Roman chuckled. “Me too.”
The red-sashed side extended a wing, carefully folding it over Virgil’s like a blanket. “For protection,” was what Roman said, “Just in case.”
Virgil scoffed playfully. “Protection from what? Your terrible humor?” He pauses. “…it feels like a weighted blanket.”
Roman beamed. “Well, you look tired, creeping beauty. Why don’t you take a nap? I’ll protect you.”
Virgil blinks up at him. “Oh, okay. If you say you.”
There’s a blissful silence between them as Virgil drifts off to sleep. Roman observes the fluffy clouds, before looking down at his dark and stormy knight. He pressed a gently and loving kiss to the top of Virgil’s head. “Have a good nap, dear.” He whispered with a smile.
Roman wasn’t too happy when Logan called him a few minutes later.
“Not now, nerdy wolverine!”
“But-“
“If you wake Virgil up with how loud you’re talking through this receiver I’ll kick your ass.”
“Okay. I’ll just text you. Don’t do anything stupid.”
Roman rolled his eyes and hung up.
On the other side, Logan rolled his eyes as he grabbed an unopened bottle of red wine. “I can’t deal with this shit right now.”
He drinks half the bottle.
~
Listen, I just wanted some Logan in this- I thought it would be funny
#sanders sides#prinxietyweek2023#roman sanders#virgil sanders#prinxiety week#sanders sides fanfiction#sandersides#tss virgil#ts roman#ts sides
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hay! so i saw that u were taking bingo prompts? and like. i was thinking maybe a blindfolded public use virgil for anonymous sex? 3rd one in O
Ok so this one, I wanted to make it long and Virgil centric but it kept fighting me on where it was going and I ended up deleting a good chunk/starting over. Probably will come back and add more one day.
Tws: mentions of future rough sex, lmk if I need to tag more and also as always NO MINORS 🔞
Gift Box
Sometimes life in the Mindscape got boring and the sides would take turns shaking things up. This time it was Virgil’s turn and he had been doom-scrolling on the nsft side of tumblr the whole night beforehand. So when the other sides came down for breakfast they were greeted by the sight of Virgil’s plump ass sticking up in the air while he faced down with a blindfold on. There was some kind of foam wedge he was laying on and beside him was a tray set up with objects and a sign.
“Free for use.” Read Logan in a steady tone, “Hmm, are those his noise canceling headphones? Interesting.” He keeps walking to the kitchen and preps the coffee maker, a thoughtful look on his face.
Patton was visibly confused about the set-up and followed Logan to the kitchen to get some French toast sticks and sausage links from the freezer. “Lo-Lo, what does that all mean?” Logan is about to answer when Roman and Remus tumble into the kitchen bickering.
“Oh come on, don't be weird about it Ro-bro. The sign says Free Use!”
“So? I don’t want to know what you plan to do with him, I don’t want to picture you naked!”
“Pfft, fiiiiine. I get it, but you’re still a party pooper!”
In the living room Janus decides to go ahead and get the event started, glove off he pours some lavender oil on his fingers and teases the muscles of Virgil’s entrance. The once quiet side gives a small gasp of surprise but settles down and tries to relax, Janus kisses his spine as reassurance while he continues. Soon he’s three fingers in the whimpering Anxiety when he takes the oil again and with a third hand snaps into existence a plug with a cute cat tail on it, perfect for tugging, and pours a good helping of the lube on its head before replacing his fingers with it. “There we go kitten, now the others can abuse that tight hole of yours without doing any damage. You know how the twins get when they get excited.”
When Janus joins them in the kitchen, washing his hands and putting his gloves back on, he is met with a blushing Logic, a pair of ruffled Creativities, and a frustrated Emotions. “I’m Self-Care, I’m duty bound to make sure sides are taken care of.” He smirks. Patton just glares at him as he plates up the simple breakfast, hands shaking as he does so. Red faced, Logan gets three mugs of coffee ready, his own, then one for Roman, and a indulgently sweet one for Janus. A sign that Logan was trying to win favor with someone, who it was, was obvious. “Hmmm? You’re all acting so pent up, do I need to start taking care of all of you as well? Can’t have neglected sides around or one could say I’m not doing my job” He smirks when the others either become embarrassed or enticed by his words, “You mustn’t remember to thank Virgil for being such a good friend for letting us all relieve some tension.”
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I just found my old e-reader and apparently in the notes I wrote sanders sides fanfiction?? What?? And it’s kinda bad but not even that bad?? I am in shock??
I wrote a scene where Unsympathetic!Patton splits creativity in half. And he does this by knocking King unconscious and tying him up. And then when King is awake, Patton litterally tears him apart. Like, he pulls on both sides of his body until his flesh rips in two. And both halves of the side grow new sides (kind of like how a lizard will grow a new tail when it’s cut off.)
And both new sides are young (half the age King used to be), so then there’s just two kids on the floor of the basement, covered in blood, and passed out from the pain. And Patton takes one and names him Roman, while letting the other one there to die. And later Janus finds the second one crying in the basement, so he named him Remus and takes him in.
There was just a bit of gore and it was sad and like??? I was 13/14 when I wrote that, what-
#tw unsympathetic Patton#tw u!patton#u!patton#unsympathetic patton#tss patton#sanders sides patton#patton sanders#tss janus#janus sanders#sanders sides janus#tss king#tss creativity#tss roman#tss remus#sanders sides roman#sanders sides remus#roman sanders#remus sanders#tw gore#?#tss fanfiction#sanders sides#tss
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My brain has been making up a Sanders Sides fanfiction in my dreams over quite a long time (I've forgotten 99% of it) and all I remember is u!Patton and u!Janus, I was Virgil clinging to a chimney while Roman smiled and waved at me through a window (also shirtless fsr, pretty sure it was prinxiety idk), Patton and Janus were murderers and Virgil knew it but still almost went to the house anyway, ran for a while in the dark and then some of my irl friends and relatives were there
I was like very mildly lucid at the time and it was weird
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Nobody Knows You Now (When You're Dying In LA)
AO3 | Masterlist
title from ‘Dying in LA’ by Panic! At The Disco
Summary: He had to prove he was worth their time. He had to prove he was worth something. He had to pay for the love that they gave, atone for their adoration, because if he stopped providing, they would stop giving, and he would be left alone and worthless and unnecessary and he wouldn’t, couldn't, can’t have that.
He had to prove he was worthy.
Word Count: 1644 Genre: angst, canonverse Characters: Roman, others mentioned Relationships: none
Warnings: slight/ambiguous u!Patton and other Sides (excepting Roman)
If I need to tag anything else, let me know!
———
An actor’s most cherished talent is their ability to reinvent themselves, donning any number of masks to hide their true face and instead portray that of another.
Roman was…exceptionally practiced at this particular skill.
From the moment he had first laid foot in the home of the Light Sides, he had been built up, celebrated; honoured as brave, courageous, noble. He stood tall and mighty, aware of his importance, aware of how much they loved him and how utterly indispensable he was—not only to Thomas, but to the other Sides, as well. He was strong, valuable, fearless, and enjoyed living up to these expectations, always meeting or exceeding them and never slowing down, because why should he? He was bold. He was powerful. He was unbreakable.
He was the Good Creativity. He was important. He had work to do, and challenges to face.
Innovation poured from his pen in great torrents, song after video after sketch, building Thomas up, building the others up, encouraging them all to meet and exceed their potential, to always take the extra step, make the extra leap forward to greatness and significance.
Roman became a symbol for more than just Creativity.
Courage. Success. Confidence. All things he now represented, titles to nurture and crowns to bear proudly. He was not ashamed of his achievements. And he was excited, ever so excited for each new day, each new challenge to face, each new obstacle to overcome.
He was the Good Creativity. He was a standard that had to be upheld.
See, the trouble with such an unwavering incline in achievements and innovation is that eventually it must slow down. Humans are, after all, not like machines or characters in a play, and need to take time to breathe, rest, reset. Creativity is not a limitless tap—but it does recharge, with time.
Roman found this incredibly frustrating.
Success, he argued, was not something you could simply wait to acquire. Success required a devoted, steadfast stream of accomplishments, effort, determination—because the moment you let up, the second you break character, those around you will dig their heels into your shoulders in order to elevate themselves. Success is a matter of how far and how fast you are willing to climb, and what you are willing to do to reach it.
Dreams unfold upon the ashes of dreams.
Roman’s work was never done. Script after script. Song after song. He churned out creations, works to display, musings to share with the world. Always improved. Each better than the last. Always refining, never slowing, because if he hesitated for even a second then those in his dust would catch up to him and he would be left behind, not good enough, never good enough.
He had to prove he was better.
What the others thought of his brother was no secret. His brother was Dark, his brother was evil, his brother was not wanted. They had no use or desire for him.
And what made Roman any different?
Your goodness, Patton would say. You create nice things. Remus creates horrible things.
But where, Roman couldn’t help but wonder, was the line? What separated ‘good’ from ‘evil’, ‘light’ from ‘dark’? Surely it was but a matter of preference, of opinion, of what the individual had learned throughout their life to be accepted or admonished?
That was, ultimately, the reason the Split had occurred in the first place.
Creativity had been torn into two entities, Roman and Remus, Remus and Roman, ‘good’ and ‘evil’.
And evil was not wanted. That much was clear, had been made clear from the very moment Roman had first grappled his way into existence. Evil lost friends. Evil lost acceptance. Evil meant nobody would listen to you, because you only caused hurt, pain, fear. ‘Evil’ was every villain of every show he had ever seen, always the losing side, never the happy ending.
And Roman was not evil. He made sure of that, tried so hard to make sure of that.
After all, could someone truly evil create such beautiful things, such exquisite artwork? And Roman was a prince! Princes were not evil, practically by default—this, of course, the reasoning behind why he had selected this moniker for himself in the first place, and fought so hard to make sure it wasn’t forgotten.
But he was running out of steam.
The quality of his creations was starting to diminish: not as popular, not as pretty, not as original. But he persevered. He had to keep going, because if he stopped, if they didn’t have a use for him anymore, if they saw through the cracks in his mask despite how he tried so hard to conceal them, then they would throw him away like they had done his brother. Like they had done Remus.
Roman did not want to be alone.
He had to prove he was worth their time. He had to prove he was worth something. He had to pay for the love that they gave, atone for their adoration, because if he stopped providing, they would stop giving, and he would be left alone and worthless and unnecessary and he wouldn’t, couldn't, can’t have that.
He had to prove he was worthy.
Minutes turned to hours turned to days spent locked behind his door, heaps of discarded scripts tossed offhandedly into empty space, neatly at first, then merely cast in the general direction of the trash as he clawed urgently for the next idea, the next project, the next success, because this would be the one, this one would prove it to them, this would show he was worth keeping around, indisputably, that he wasn’t evil, that he wasn’t his brother.
The papers piled up, Roman’s notebook overflowing with discarded ideas, and yet Thomas’s remained blank.
Once, Patton found him, head in his hands past four in the morning, torn up pages obscuring his desk and floor and half-full coffee mugs littering worksurfaces. He had been led gently to bed, and the next day Roman did not miss the sympathetic glances the others thought he couldn’t see. He didn’t miss the demeaningly cautious tone to Patton’s voice, Virgil’s uncharacteristic lack of teasing insults, the way Logan didn’t correct him, even when he purposefully misused the word ‘inchoate’ just to get a rise from him.
He had failed them. He was supposed to be strong. He was supposed to be confident, proud, indomitable. Most of all, he was supposed to be creative.
That was his symbol, his mark, his purpose. It had to be upheld. He could not allow it to slip between his fingers, fall and shatter, scatter into a million tiny, irredeemable pieces, each too small to be of any consequence or concern.
He couldn’t allow them to see him stumble, because in a moment he would be gone, cast out, forgotten. Not worthy, not ‘good’, not enough.
He had to be stronger, he had to be unyielding, he had to act the part—and act he would. Acting was one of the few talents he actually possessed, one of the few uses he had, and he would damn well make the most of it.
An emotional mask, to an actor, is elementary. Change your face, portray another, hide your true thoughts and emotions and instead channel those of someone else, someone without the meagre concerns of your own life.
Roman donned his mask—someone proud, someone self-assured, someone powerful and determined and Good.
He would not let the mask break. He would patch the cracks before they showed, with wit and charm, magnificence and splendour. Because if they couldn’t see him beneath the extravagance, if they were unable to peer too hard into the shining brilliance lest they damage their eyes, they’d never even know the cracks were there.
He would be brave. He would be proud. Most of all, he would be ‘Good’.
He was not like his brother. He was not horrible. He was worthy, he was wanted, he was loved, and cherished, and appreciated. He was. Of course he was.
He had to make it. He had to be good enough. Because if he wasn’t, if he couldn’t do the only thing he’d ever been good at, what use was he to them? What worth did he have?
Without his mask, what else was left?
The mask had become so rudimentary, so ingrained in his flesh that he wasn’t sure he even existed beyond it any more. He had been acting the part for so long, he wasn’t sure he could stop. He wasn’t sure he wanted to.
‘Roman’ had become nothing more than a character he portrayed, his greatest and most elaborate creation. And he had been playing this ‘Roman’ for so long, this bold and brave and extravagant prince, he wasn’t sure he remembered who he had been before.
Had he been anyone before?
Or was this all he was? A shell? A vessel through which a character was to be portrayed?
Maybe he was never supposed to change, to question. Maybe he was supposed to just keep creating, keep acting, continue playing the part of this bold, brave prince.
That was his function, after all. His purpose. And as long as he existed in some shape or form, he must continue to uphold it, no matter how much he may wish otherwise.
As long as he kept creating, as long as he paid for his place, upheld his standard, he couldn’t be forgotten. Couldn’t be overlooked.
These challenges strengthened him, fleshed out his character for a bigger and better and bolder performance. This pain led to amelioration. And if he kept pushing away the negative feelings, no matter how insistently they tried to tear him down, he would be able to soldier forward.
He is an actor, after all. And the show must go on.
#sanders sides#roman sanders#ts roman#sanders sides fanfic#thomas sanders#sanders sides roman#fanfic#rian writes#tw u!patton#not purposefully written that way but it could be read so.#angst#taglists to follow! in a reblog#lmk if you wanna be added!#i reeeally like this one#good follow up to logan's fic 'numb' that i posted forever ago jdgshfgh#they vibe similarly#there are some pretty rad lines in this fic if i do say so myself#feels good to finish writing something after so long!
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"Honey you're familiar like my mirror years ago
Idealism sits in prison, chivalry fell on it's sword
Innocence died screaming, honey ask me I should know
I slithered here from Eden just to sit outside your door"
- From Eden, Hozier
This drawing was inspired by this prompt that the fantastic @welovelogansanders has kindly shared with me to help me overcome the art block:
Patton has abused Logan for a short period of time without the others knowing but then Remus found out and got Logan out of the relationship and so they got together instead.
The two spend a lot of time together in the imagination, but Remus after a while starts talking about how the Light sides are slowly crumbling, and how they are destined to fall apart.
(Virgil - Idealism
Roman - Chivalry
Patton - Innocence)
#digital art#ts remus#remus sanders#art#sanders sides au#thomas sanders#my art#ts logan#tw abuse#tw U!patton#tw abusive relationship#logan sanders#sanders sides#jajart
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I bring you: *squints eyes* angst (Also tryin out diff styles :))
#fanart#logan sanders#patton sanders#remus sanders#roman sanders#sanders sides#thomas sanders#sometimes u gotta make ur favs suffer mwahahaha#doodes#tw body horror
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>> “And those wings aren’t the only thing you’ve been neglecting, are they?”
Fun fact! The blue bellied roller, which is the bird Patton’s wings are based off of, have a diet that includes snakes! I didn’t know when I started this, it’s a bit ironic. I almost didn’t post this because it started as a vent and there’s a bunch of errors, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#sanders sides#ts sides#sanders sides comic#mini comic#my art#snappy's art tag#Janus sanders#Patton sanders#ts janus#ts Patton#blue bellied roller#great kiskadee#feather plucking#tw self destruction#tw self neglect#minor vent#ask to tag#moceit#platonic moceit#or romantic it’s up to u#Patton angst#hurt/comfort#winged Patton#winged janus#wing au#wings
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After a long pause, we're back in the Chapter 3 timeline
[< Previous] || [Masterpost] || Next...
#unsympathetic patton#u!patton au#sanders sides#ts patton#patton sanders#janus sanders#ts janus#roman sanders#ts roman#ts remus#ts logan#ts virgil#tw angst#tw weapon#tw fighting#tw murder mention#comic#long post#doodlem8#tw yelling#tw crying#tw arguing#tw threats#tw fear#tw stress#u!patton
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sasi surf instructor hcs pt 2. part one here
roman has signed a couple of the kids boards just because
patton doesnt know how to save himself from being murdered by the waves. he can help the kids fine but for some reason every time he’s paddling out he just. no balance.
its a miracle patton can even surf honestly
+ he and logan cant. see. they cant wear their glasses in the ocean which means that they’re both half blind but they make it work (yes im projecting doing ANYTHING without glasses is hard)
i said last time patton drives thekids but honestly i think the sides take turns, if only so i can hc that remus lets the kids play eminem on full blast when he drives them
virgil likes to take breaks from teaching to surf by himself sometimes. he frequently utilises these breaks to find ways to spray janus and roman with water
more often than not this ends in vi and ro competing over who is the better surfer
remus finds. a lot of fish. like a concerning amount. remus why are there so many fish on your board that doesnt just happen
roman, remus and virgil basically live on the beach. they go out so much that the tips of their hair has been bleached bright platinum blond (its more noticeable on remus and virgil though).
virgil dyes the ends purple. the kids think it’s the coolest thing ever
he dyed remus’ hair green at some point but it was demi permanent and washed off in the waves pretty quickly
patton brings cookies for all the little kiddos. sometimes he brings oreos when he doesn’t have time to actually bake them. the kids love him for it.
roman wears chains when he’s surfing. he just does. its stupid amd inconvenient but he does.
i also believe wholeheartedly that he has super long hair. he doesnt tie it up either (hairbands are kinda a lost cause for him) so he just looks peak surfer dude
inserting my virgil is buff hc. he can carry three 9ft surf boards no sweat
logan has on more than one occasion listened in to the kids (and janus and roman)’s gossip, dropped a wild story, and left with no elaboration. did he actually get a tattoo once when he was drunk? has one of his friends actually been struck by lightning in the ocean and lived? who knows.
(in the second case, yes. it was remus. the dumbass STILL goes surfing in stormy weather too.)
speaking of surf related accidents, there have been many
roman once broke his ring finger when a wave yanked his board away from him
patton regularly forgets to face his board straight (towards the waves) and has been hit in the face multiple times
logan is a small man. the current is his worst enemy
somehow janus gets a new cut every lesson. from the board fins to stepping on coral to somehow getting his ankle scraped. it happens every time
virgil is too careful and used to the waves by now to get hurt much, but sometimes he forgets that the kids can’t do some things he’s used to (like tuck diving) and he does things like just shoving them headfirst into a wave with no warning
remus has no depth perception. he sometimes tries to paddle out and try to go ever a wave only to get crushed by it. hes probably gotten every possible injury from surfing at least once
patton likes to take the kids back to the beach sometimes to meditate for a bit. it doesnt do anything, he just likes making the kids laugh by saying “Ommmmmm” in a really deep, serious voice
janus gets sunburnt SO easily it’s honestly ridiculous. like, he’d be covering up most of his body, wearing a ton of sunscreen, and manage to get burnt on his hands or smth
#sanders sides#ts sanders sides#janus sanders#roman sanders#remus sanders#patton sanders#virgil sanders#headcannons#surf instructor au#tw injury#its mentioned but u can never be too sure#i still wanna make a hc group based on the kids they train hmm#later lol
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If you had to read only unsympathetic {any side} for the rest of your life, who would you pick and why?
Oh def u!Patton, I can read and enjoy most of the sides as unsympathetic, but u!Patton just gets the inspiration flowing so much
I also have the blog @unsympathetic-patton-prompts to get the maxd amount of inspiration out
#sanders sides#patton sanders mention#u!patton#unsympathetic patton#tw u!patton#tw unsympathetic patton
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