#tw Inconsiderate people

[hylias-gremlin]

Just got asked by someone when I'll finally am going to get pregnant since I'm a woman and I was like, woah... wtf? (Also I'm only 25...)

First of all: None of your hecking business. STOP ASKING PEOPLE WITH A WOMB WHEN THEY'LL HAVE CHILDREN THAT'S SO IMPOLITE AND ANNOYING.

Second of all, (what actually gave me a sense of power and control over the situation because it made the other person hella uncomfortable): I turned to them, looked them dead in the eye and told them I'm infertile (which it the truth) and their entire face just screamed panic mode while they apologized to me.

But seriously, like, what the hell? It doesn't matter if a person has health issues or isn't ready or simply doesn't want to. They have a reason to decide not to have kids, and no one is entitled to demand answers or reason why they don't want to have kids. Just leave them be. Have kids of your own if you want, but don't force that on others with inconsiderate remarks or questions.

[clotpolesonly]

i'm still really surprised that it's not a more popular headcanon/theory for Niall to have sexually abused Declan, esp from before greywaren came out with all its background details and flashback retcons

i mean, really, honestly:

unstable home life, emotional disconnect from parents, little trust in authority figures, serious communication boundary with siblings, inability to form stable reciprocal relationships with partners, constantly courting attention from parental figures outside the home, far more mature than his years, aggressively self-sufficient and unwilling to rely on anyone else for help or support, clothes as armor and shield

even just for one kid, esp the eldest, to have SUCH a starkly different view and opinion of his father than the other kids

for even his siblings to be noticeably uncomfortable with how different his dynamic and treatment within the family was? even Matthew recognizes that Declan was treated differently, and he and Ronan were both like "yikes.......so anyway......." and just opted to not look at that too closely, because it challenged their rosy view of their loving doting father

Declan's childhood is FULL of scary traumatizing secrets that his father forced him to keep even from his brothers, that his mother knew about but did nothing to stop, that he doesn't know how to communicate to anyone in a way that makes them understand he wasn't complicit in or responsible for any of it (partly because he feels complicit in it)

the parallel is honestly so strong, i can't believe there are no fics that really explore this interpretation

[martyrbat]

tumblr users love not tagging flashing lights its their favorite thing to do

[cuntstable]

feeling a desire to rant and get a bit angry but its about serious stuff so it wouldnt even be fun. ugh !

[sunniques]

— 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 ?

➺ PAIRING: lee heeseung x female reader

➺ GENRE: stepbrother au, smut

➺ SUMMARY: the story of how your stepbrother’s girlfriend realizes her boyfriend has never really been hers.

➺ CW/TW: stepcest, infidelity, possessiveness, heeseung can lift reader, cucking kink, voyeurism, masturbation (f), oral sex (f), fingering, face sitting, unprotected sex, creampies

➺ WC: 4.6k

NOTE: don’t like, don’t read.

A lot of people find your relationship with your stepbrother cute. How could they not? He’s always so doting and protective like a real brother would be. In spite of being only slightly older, Heeseung takes on a very important role in your life. He constantly goes out of his way to take care of you, making sure you have anything you could possibly need.

Heeseung’s girlfriend never thought too much about the relationship between you two. It was natural that he took the naive college freshman under his wing and constantly had you by his side. Mina found it endearing, actually. The way he worried about you like a mother hen who wasn’t ready for her young chick to go into the world alone is adorable and a good sign. After dating so many inconsiderate losers, she thinks she’s finally chosen the right guy.

But somewhere along the way, Mina starts to grow tired of it. Time has gone by, and you’re no longer a naive freshman who can’t get around without her boyfriend’s help. Of course family is important, but it’s not like you’re entirely helpless. And yet, that’s exactly the way Heeseung acts. He’s always ready to drop everything when you need him. On several humiliating occasions, he’s even left her half naked on his bed just to go to you because you bought something you couldn’t figure out how to put together, or because you wanted to hang out with him.

It’s hard for Mina to admit that she’s a little jealous. Especially because it all seems so ridiculous. There’s no way her boyfriend actually wants you like that. But as time goes on, she thinks that maybe she’s not all that crazy. Especially with the affectionate way her boyfriend looks at you. Despite all this, Mina doesn’t say anything. At least, not until Heeseung starts to bring you along to what were meant to be dates.

“Babe, why do you keep bringing your stepsister? i thought we were going on a date?” It’s hard for her to not sound bitter and annoyed.

“Her roommate is going to visit her parents, and I don’t want Y/N to be alone.” His tone is kind and gentle like always, but it’s also firm and leaves no room for arguments.

What’s worse is that Mina can’t bring herself to hate or blame you. In a way, she understands why her boyfriend is always so concerned about you. You’re so nice and trusting that it would be way too easy for someone to take advantage of that. There’s also the fact that you’ve been more than willing to let them have some alone time, but Heeseung never lets you leave.

It’s all so strange and frustrating that Mina feels like she has to take matters into her own hands. So she does.

The key to Heeseung letting you go is getting you a boyfriend—or at least getting you to start dating. It’s easy enough to find a guy who’s interested in you. That’s never been a problem for you, and all it takes is her showing your picture to the cute guy in her communications class for her plan to fall into place. As luck would have it, you’re also into meeting the guy and going out with him.

Little did Mina know, setting you up with him would be a mistake that would cost her everything.

On the night you’re meant to meet up with her classmate, Mina excitedly goes to her boyfriend’s apartment. It’s been a long time since she got to be alone with Heeseung, and she was going to make the most of it.

She’s dressed in tiny tank top and a cute little skirt that Heeseung loves—it barely hides the lingerie she’s wearing underneath. Mina quietly lets herself into her boyfriend’s apartment using her spare key. Quietly, she tiptoes to his room only to find the door wide open. What she doesn’t expect is to find you sitting on his the edge of bed while Heeseung kneels in front of you.

Mina feels like a bucket of cold water has been dumped on her as his pretty hands rub your soft thighs. You look incredible, clad in a cute little dress with your makeup and hair done to perfection. It’s a mistake for Mina to keep watching, but she can’t find her voice at the moment.

“Seungie, what’s wrong?”

God, Mina hates that you call him that. Mostly because she can tell how much Heeseung likes it.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going out to meet some guy?” Heeseung sounds almost venomous, but it’s like you don’t hear it. “Who is he? How’d you meet him?”

You tilt your head, pretty lips pulled down in a confused frown. “Didn’t Mina tell you? She set me up with a guy from her class. He’s really cute!”

A chill goes down Mina’s spine. She can see Heeseung’s back tense when you tell him how your date came to be. The air feels almost murderous as he gently squeezes your thighs.

It kills Heeseung that he was almost too late in stopping you from meeting some strange guy in the pretty little dress you have on. He softly rubs your thighs, eyes simmering with anger and desire he doesn’t care to hide. Not anymore.

“Oh, angel.” Your stepbrother murmurs, hands slowly trailing up to your thighs. “You know you’re my favorite girl, right?”

An unsuspecting smile graces your lips. “Yeah. And you’re my favorite guy.”

Heeseung hums in satisfaction as his fingers ghost the edges of your dress. He watches your eyebrows furrow, but you don’t say anything. As always, you have blind trust in your stepbrother. That’s all the indication he needs to get up and push you down on his bed. Heeseung hovers over you, loving how you’re staring up at him with sparkling, wide eyes. He swoops down to capture your lips in a searing kiss.

Your heart is racing in your chest as Heeseung forces his tongue into your mouth. Despite the initial shock, you quickly melt into the kiss. He swallows your moans, pulling you closer as he deepens the messy kiss. You mewl into his mouth, carding your fingers through his hair with desire you had never realized you had for him.

Meanwhile, Mina can only watch as her boyfriend kisses you with a passion that he clearly never felt for her. It feels like her heart is ripping in half as Heeseung begins to undress you. Tears well up in her eyes when he groans at the sight of the lingerie adorning your body. Mina can see how hard he is from where she’s standing, and the desire in his eyes is very different from the way he looks at her.

“Can’t believe you got all pretty for some other boy.” Heeseung spits as he starts to undress. “Were planning on letting him fuck you?”

You shake your head and go to speak, but you can’t when Heeseung roughly pulls off your lingerie then his own underwear. His cock is thick and big, possibly the biggest you’ve ever seen. It’s twitching and leaking as he looks at you with his dark eyes.

“W-We shouldn’t be doing this.” You whine as Heeseung shoves your thighs to your stomach and licks a broad stripe up your wet pussy.

Your stepbrother groans at your sweet taste, thrusting his tongue into your dripping hole. He laps up the juices leaking out of your slit, circling his tongue on your clit for good measure. The noise you let out is downright pornographic and pure music to Heeseung’s ears.

“Seungie!” You keen as you spread your legs and tangle your hands in his messy hair. “I– Fuck!”

Heeseung pulls back with a wet slurp to spread your cunt open with his big hands. “God. You have the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen, angel. Just had to taste it.”

Each one of his words is like a dagger to Mina’s heart and confidence. Wet tears trickle down her face, but she doesn’t say anything as you pull on her boyfriend’s hair. Heeseung only moans and dives back into your slick cunt. He greedily laps up everything that drips out of you, sucking and kissing your clit.

“We shouldn’t be doing this, Hee.” You repeat through a needy mewl, making no attempt to stop him. In fact, you buck your pussy into his mouth as he sucks on your sensitive bud.

“Shh, angel.” Heeseung shushes as he flicks his tongue across your swollen bud. “Just relax and let me eat you out. Been wanting to do this for so long.”

Mina swallows thickly, the hurt slowly being replaced by something else. Her eyes grow bigger when she realizes which feeling is taking over. She shifts slightly, feeling a familiar wetness begin to pool in her panties. Mina feels sick that the sight of her boyfriend cheating on her can turn her on, and she thinks that she should leave right now and never return.

But she stays.

Mina licks her lips and continues to watch. Even she can’t help but think how hot you look, whimpering and writhing as Heeseung pushes your thighs apart so he can bury his face deeper in your pussy. He flicks his tongue, slowly descending until he’s lapping at your hole, slowly fucking the wet muscle in and out. Your eyes roll back as your stepbrother eats your pussy like it’s the best thing he’s ever tasted.

The sounds coming from your pussy and the way Heeseung messily eats you out has Mina’s own cunt clenching with need. She can feel her underwear start to stick to her cunt as she watches her boyfriend lap up your arousal like a starved man. Mina bites her lip, feeling sick and twisted for being turned on by your pretty moans.

Heeseung suddenly pulls away, but not before he slaps your thigh playfully. He goes to lay on his back all while wearing a filthy smirk. “Sit on my face.”

You bite your lip as a hot flash of arousal pulses through your body. Both your and Mina’s cunts throb at the suggestion. Heeseung sees your hesitation, but doesn’t back down.

“C’mon, baby. Be a good little stepsister and ride my fucking face.” He growls out with dark eyes.

With your pussy dripping, you crawl over to him and kneel over his face. Mina watches with heated eyes as you slowly lower your cunt on her boyfriend’s face. The heat in her stomach grows when she hears Heeseung groan in satisfaction.

“That’s it. I want your pretty pussy suffocating me.”

With that, your stepbrother grabs your hips and pulls your cunt down onto his face with a groan. Mewling quietly, you rub your cunt all over his mouth. Every time he moans or grunts, it sends little vibrations through your pussy. The delicious feeling has you grinding down on his tongue as you chase that feeling. Heeseung eagerly fucks his wet muscle into your hot cunt, already addicted to your sweet taste.

Mina swallows thickly when he sees Heeseung thrusting into the air as he eats you out. His cock is leaking and throbbing with need. Fuck. How she’d like to go and lick all that up, to have him fuck her mouth as he fucks you with his tongue. Mina rubs her thighs to soothe the growing ache in her pussy as she watches you ride Heeseung’s face.

Your eyes roll back when your stepbrother slaps your ass. A loud squeal spills from your lips as Heeseung keeps fucking his tongue up into your cunt. He grabs your ass and kneads it roughly. With one last groan and flick of his tongue, he sits up and takes you with him. The effortless display of strength turns both women on, one containing her moan while the other cries out as she’s pressed back into the mattress.

“Such a sweet little cunt.” Heeseung moans as he buries his face back into your dripping cunt. “Shit, Y/N. You’re fucking soaked down here.”

“Heeseung!” You cry out as he pries your thighs further apart. Your stepbrother shakes his head to grind his tongue against your sensitive cunt.

“Fuck, you have the hottest little pussy.” Heeseung lifts his head with a groan, lips shiny with your arousal. “Missed eating some good pussy. It’s been so long.”

Mina feels pathetic that her cunt throbs at his degrading words. She bites her lip, hands trailing up her thigh and to her soaked underwear. It’s so filthy and humiliating, but the ache in her pussy is getting to be too much. She slowly rubs circles on her covered cunt as she keeps watching her boyfriend cheat on her.

“Fuck, Seungie.” You mewl desperately. “S-Shouldn’t like having your face buried in my cunt.”

Heeseung smirks into your wetness. He gently circles his tongue on your clit, kissing it tenderly before he gently starts to nip at it with his teeth. Mina shoves her panties aside when you moan out in pleasure. Now she’s furiously rubbing at her bare pussy, wanting to see you cum on her boyfriend’s face.

“But you do, baby. You like me fucking you with my tongue, and I fucking love eating this sweet little pussy.”

Your hips buck up at the words, grinding your cunt against his mouth as you moan for him. Juices drip out of you lewdly, leaking down to your ass and onto Heeseung’s sheets. Your head is swimming with pleasure, and you have to remember that this is all so very wrong.

“You like that?” Heeseung teases you, loving how you’ve turned into putty in his hands. “Answer me, Y/N. Do you like your stepbrother telling you how much he loves tasting your juicy cunt?”

Your back arches when Heeseung sucks your puffy bud into his mouth. “God—yes! Feels so fucking good, Hee! Love having your mouth on my pussy.”

Heeseung growls, the vibrations making your cunt throb as he sucks and licks your swollen clit. Eager to have you cum on his tongue, he slips two fingers into your fluttering hole. Mina follows in suit, unable to take her eyes off the erotic sight of you getting ate out and fingered. Fuck. This was better than any porn she had ever watched. Her hand is dripping with her own arousal, and she can’t even feel disgusted anymore that she’s so turned on by the entire situation.

“Mmmh, shit, Hee.” You whine as the tips of his fingers brush against the gummy spot inside you. “You’re gonna make me cum.”

“Do it, baby. Cream all over my tongue.” He purrs in delight. “Be a good girl and cum for me.”

Heeseung flattens his tongue on your clit while his fingers grind into the spongy spot in your cunt. Your back arches off the bed, orgasm whiting out your thoughts as you cum around his long fingers.

Mina has to cover her mouth as Heeseung moans along with you. By now she’s shoved her fingers into her sopping pussy, the squelching sound is drowned out from the sounds coming from your own pussy. The filthy sight is driving her wild, and she’s so delirious with arousal that she wishes Heeseung would just fuck you already.

“You’re amazing, angel.” Your stepbrother praises with his fingers still buried knuckle deep in your pussy as he softly strokes your velvety walls. “So soft and wet. It makes me want to shove my dick into your tight little hole.”

Heeseung slowly pulls his fingers out of you, and you can only watched with a lidded gaze as he moves his body between your thighs. His cock is twitching and leaking as he grabs the base. He smacks his cock down on your slippery pussy, dragging his drooling tip up and down your slit slowly. Mina has to press her hand into her mouth harder to stifle her filthy moans. The sight of her boyfriend pressing his drooling cockhead into your soaking pussy is so hot she might just cum all over her fingers.

“S-Seungie—fuck. We shouldn’t.” You whimper as he leans forward and braces his arms by your head.

You and Mina both know you don’t really mean your words. It’s clear that you want your stepbrother to split you open on his big cock. That becomes obvious when you don’t try to stop him as he shoves his cock into your pussy until he bottoms out completely, balls pressing against your ass. Shuddering with pleasure, you scratch your nails up his arms as you sink into the bed.

“Pretty pussy was meant to take my cock.” Heeseung growls, already drunk on the feeling of your cunt wrapped around his dick. “Fuck. I know it’s wrong, baby, but I just couldn’t help myself. Your hot little cunt was just begging for my dick. Doesn’t it feel all nice and full having your pussy stuffed with your stepbrother’s big cock?"

Mina starts fucking herself harder when you nod desperately. Your hands go to tangle in his hair as you grind your hips up to meet his thrusts. “Yes! Fuck! Love my stepbrother’s cock stretching me open! Feels so fucking good, Hee!”

Mina knows better than anyone how good you must feel. Although, she imagines you feel must better than she ever did because from the way Heeseung’s fucking you, she can tell he’s doing it with much more enthusiasm and passion. Even his moans are more guttural and full of more pleasure than she’d ever heard. They’re deep as he pulls out until just his tip is spearing you open. Then, he pushes forward, thrusting his cock deep into your fluttering walls.

“That’s it. Tell me how good it feels.” Heeseung leans down, lips brushing against yours. “Don’t be shy, angel. Let me know how much you like this cock fucking you.”

You gasp wantonly and pull him down further to press your lips together. He groans and licks into your mouth easily, tongue slipping past your lips as his cock thrusts deep into your hot, wet cunt. Your hips buck up to meet his, loving how his dick rams into your sweet spot over and over until your sight is painted with pretty little stars.

“Fucking love it, Hee.” You moan between sloppy kisses. “God—I love your cock!”

The coil in Mina’s stomach is close to snapping. By now, her juices are dripping down to her wrist. Luckily, the lewd squelching and sound of skin slapping together drown out any noise she’s making. Heeseung is fucking you so hard and good that she can smell the musky scent of sex from where she’s standing. The erotic aroma turns her on even more, pussy clamping down on her fingers in desperate need of release.

“Tight little pussy feels so good.” Heeseung moans out between the quick pecks he’s giving you. “God, I love you, Y/N. So fucking much.”

Your heart races as Mina’s breaks all over again. It hurts, but somehow that just turns her on even more. She keeps fingering herself as tears pool in her eyes.

With a low moan, your pussy clamps down on Heeseung’s dick tightly as you go to eagerly kiss him. A soft I love you, too goes unnoticed by Mina, but not by your stepbrother. He groans into your mouth, cock throbbing inside you.

“Mmmh.” Heeseung hums against your lips before he trails wet kisses down your neck. “I love my gorgeous girl. That’s why this feels so good. Even your tight little pussy knows how much I love you.”

His gorgeous girl? Mina thinks deliriously, orgasm dangerously close. It’s something he never referred to her as.

You cry out loudly when Heeseung bites your neck and sucks the skin into his mouth. His hips rock against yours, balls smacking against your ass as his pelvis grinds down on your swollen clit.

“Seungie!” You whine in ecstasy. “I’m getting close.”

Your stepbrother doesn’t let up. In fact, his thrusts seem to get faster and rougher. His cock pistons in and out of your cunt, creating sloppy wet sounds as you get even wetter. His eyes are dark as he pulls back to look at you, all pretty squirming and trembling on his cock.

“Cum for me, baby. Cover my cock with your sweet cream so I can fill you up.” Heeseung pants. “Cum on my cock, angel.”

His teeth sink into your neck again, and it pushes you over the edge. Your hot cunt throbs as you squeeze down on his cock. Somehow your pussy only gets tighter and tighter as you get fucked through your orgasm. You tighten your legs around his waist until he can barely pull out, rutting his cock in short shallow thrusts as your climax starts to taper off.

“So fucking tight.” Heeseung hisses by your ear. “Shit, baby. Get ready. I’m about to creampie your cute little pussy. Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

With a strangled grunt, he buries his cock to the hilt and shoots his load deep inside your fluttering walls while your pussy softly milks him for every drop of his hot cum. Mina reaches her own climax when she sees her boyfriend cumming inside you. She has to stifle her moans as she trembles and shakes outside the room that’s filled with the smell and sounds of hot sex.

“You’re taking it so well, angel.” Heeseung kisses your jaw tenderly as his fat tip spurts rope after rope of his thick cum into your clenching heat. “Milking my cock like I knew you would.”

He grinds his hips down, cock pulsing as he finishes stuffing you full of his hot, sticky load. Your stepbrother fucks his cum inside a bit more before reluctantly pulling out. Heeseung’s cock throbs as he watches his seed drip from your messy pussy.

He licks his lips, heated gaze never leaving your body. “Let’s do it again.”

You don’t try to protest as your manhandles into a different position. Mina is still coming down from her high when she realizes her boyfriend is still hard and about to fuck you again. She knows she shouldn’t feel excited or aroused by the fact, but she does. Especially when your face is shoved into one of Heeseung’s pillows just before his big cock rails back into your needy pussy.

Heeseung starts fucking you so hard his headboard slams into the wall repeatedly. The harsh sound pairs well with the plop plop plop sound coming from your cunt.

“God, Y/N. You’re so fucking good for me.” Heeseung groans when you clench down on him.

You moan loudly, bouncing yourself back on his cock. “Fu-Fuck, Seungie. This is wrong. We s-shouldn’t be doing this.”

“I know.” Your stepbrother smacks your ass, not sounding the least bit remorseful. “It’s so dirty baby, but I couldn’t help myself. Had to get my dick wet using your pretty little pussy.”

“Mmmh!” You whine out mindlessly, face turned to the side with your ass raised in the air for Heeseung to fuck deeper into your wet hole. “Feels so fucking good!”

“Yeah, it does.” Heeseung’s laugh sounds almost mean as he speeds up his thrusts to fuck his cock harder into your sopping cunt. “Your cute little pussy is the best I’ve ever had.”

His words shouldn’t please you as much as they do, but those lewd words turn you on so much that you can’t stop your cunt from tightening around him as he keeps spearing into you like an animal in heat. They also shouldn’t turn on Heeseung’s girlfriend but that’s exactly what they do. She isn’t angry, only extremely aroused as your ass bounces back on your stepbrother’s pelvis.

“Fuck!” Heeseung groans, fucking his cock right into your g-spot. “You’re so fucking hot, angel.”

You are. So hot that Mina finds herself wishing she could eat Heeseung’s cum out of your pretty cunt. She just knows you taste good, and mixed with her boyfriend she’s sure you must taste even better.

“Seungie, please!” You cry out, dizzy with arousal.

“Shit.” He growls, slipping a hand underneath your hips to rub fast circles on your clit. “Gonna make you cream on my cock again.”

“Heeseung!” You squeal as he picks up his pace, ramming into your squelching pussy as he rubs soft circles into your swollen clit.

Your stepbrother shoves his cock deep into your cunt and grinds, making you squirm and whine as his dick rubs against the spongy spot in your pussy. Your hands twist in the sheets. He flicks and pinches your puffy clit. God, do you look good, and so does Heeseung. Mina is groping one of her tits while the other hand goes to play with her pussy again. Briefly, she thinks she wouldn’t mind having a video of you two fucking so she can watch it over and over again.

“Hee, I’m gonna cum.” You moan against the pillow.

“Do it, baby.” He encourages you, free hand coming down to slap your ass hard. “Cum all over my cock. Want to feel your hot cunt squeeze me.”

It’s not long before your orgasm hits. You’re screaming into your pillow as your cream coats Heeseung’s big cock. Your pussy clamps rhythmically around his dick. Mina can’t see you, but with the way your toes are curling she can tell your eyes are rolling to the back of your head in pure ecstasy.

“Oh, baby. You feel so fucking good.” Heeseung praises you. His hands move to slap your ass again, making you squeal and tighten again. “Fucking work your little pussy on my cock. Fuck. Need to fill you up again.”

“Want you to stuff me full.” You whine back at him, pussy fluttering at the thought of Heeseung’s cum filling your cunt again.

“Yeah?” Your stepbrother laughs, sounding way too delighted. “Want me to creampie your hot little cunt again?”

“Please!” You whine as Heeseung’s fingers slide over your hip to start working soft circles into your clit again. You writhe back on him, feeling yourself get even wetter at the filthy thought of him shooting his hot load inside you.

“Cum inside me, Hee.” You pant, mewling when his fingers rub your clit even faster. “Want it so bad. Want to feel it.”

“Oh, fuck.” Heeseung groans, hips snapping hard against your ass when he feels how tight you’ve gotten. “You ready, baby? Fucking take it. Take your stepbrother’s cum in your needy little cunt.”

You moan loudly when you feel his hot cum filling your pussy, stuffing you so full it drips out around his cock. Heeseung ruts his spent cock into your sloppy pussy as he pinches your clit, watching as your back arches as a fourth orgasm sweeps through you. You lazily fuck your cunt back into him, loving the feeling of his cum dripping out of you and coating your thighs.

Heeseung pulls out of your warm cunt with a low groan. He’s quick to pull you against his chest and lays you down with him. His face is buried in your hair, eyes closed in bliss as you both try to catch your breaths. You feel his smile in your hair as he cuddles you and murmurs sweet praises against your temple.

Through your drooping eyes, you catch sight of Mina. Her eyes widen when you two make eye contact. You can’t hide your smirk when you see that she was masturbating to the sight of Heeseung fucking you raw. Instead of saying anything, you give her a seductive wink. Mina clenches around her fingers because the wink is full of understanding and promises.

It’s clear that Heeseung was never hers, but maybe you wouldn’t mind sharing.

[beeleoblue]

PEOPLE WHO VAPE IN PUBLIC I'M BITING YOU BITING YOU BITING YOU

[schoenpepper]

Hi! I’ve got a rq but it’s kind of elaborate and might be sensitive to u so if u don’t wanna do it that’s fine!

But can I have some hcs of Deuce, Jack, Leona, Vil, Epel, Malleus, Silver, and Lilia with a reader who lived with a single parent all their life (whom they were very close with) who passed away not long before they came to TW, but they never said anything about it. So as a way to grieve they wear their parent’s shirts/jackets, accessories and fragrances because they’re all they have of said parent.

Vil sees that some of their clothes doesn’t quite fit their size or style, Jack and Leona can smell a very faint lingering scent of another on their shirts, Deuce notices them playing with their necklace frequently, etc.

I Still Feel You, I Still See You, I Still Hear You

Warnings: bad grammar, awful writing, not proofread, sad things, dead parents ig, platonic-ish, short

A/N: No need to be considerate nonnie my parents are fine haha. Finished this while trying to review for my accounting quiz tomorrow...uh, later this afternoon...?

Masterlist

Deuce might be a little...denser, regarding the situation.

However, he's not that tactless.

Ahaha he so is

Forgive him, he always means well. That sentence doesn't make it any better when he brings up the necklace you can never seem to stop fiddling with.

"My mom gave it to me before she died."

Mmh baby gets shut up realll quick.

Do you...want to share his mom?

Pardon the wording. He really means well.

So do you want to come home with him for the holidays?

Jack has a good sense of smell, so it's a bit jarring when the usual scent you have on you is replaced by a musky sort of cologne that you were unlikely to ever wear.

He asks an innocent question.

You give an innocent answer.

"It was my dad's cologne. It's his death anniversary today."

He pats your shoulder to express his condolences.

He doesn't usually do this but, do you want ice cream? His treat.

If you insist really hard, he'll let you cuddle his tail as an apology for his "insensitive" question (it wasn't really but ok)

Leona is very emotionally and socially sensitive, so he'll have a few guesses in mind already.

Your leather jacket always smells faintly of smoke.

He doesn't ask about it. Actively wards off people who makes comments about it, too.

You'll be the one to bring it up when you trust him enough.

"It was my dad's. The only thing salvaged from the fire."

Awkward.

Tsk, you're so troublesome.

Pulls you under his blanket for lots of grumpy cuddles.

He's not good with sappy comforting stuff, so you'll have to make do with his presence. He'll sit by you and listen, 'kay?

Vil is a lot of things, but he's not inconsiderate, and he's certainly not stupid.

When he first sees you wearing that ungodly sweater, soft and knitted and in such a drab color that it completely washed you out, he does get a little curious.

You have better fashion sense than that, potato.

But he notices the way you seem to sink into the fabric, eyes dazed and looking out into the distance.

"It was my mom's."

Oh. Alright.

Now he's a bit embarrassed.

Hm, maybe if you pair the sweatshirt with these pants... and do your hair like this...

You can mourn and look gorgeous while doing it, darling.

Still, he won't force anything if you don't want to.

Epel thinks the ring on your finger is really neat. He's not really one for girly things, but to be honest, he does find it a little bit cute.

Not that...he likes cute things...

Anyway, where did you get it from? Gee, you sure do stare at it a lot.

"My mom left it for me when she died."

Grim topic, but alright.

Likely the type to try and steer the conversation away to some other topic after apologizing for bringing it up.

Says your eyes are pretty. Accidentally.

He'll blush and deny it and apologize for saying weird things.

Idia accidentally snagged your watch on some cable wires while you were in the bathroom.

Total whoops. No problem, he got it out ez

Ugh, why are you panicking, dude? The watch is fine, y'know?

"Sorry, it's just, it's the last thing I have of my dad."

Okaaaay he'll go die in a ditch now tnx

He definitely feels like crap. Not to mention, he's also someone who lost someone super important to him, who was his world and best friend.

Buries himself in his bed and dies.

Silver isn't one to pry, so at normal times, he's unlikely to mention anything about your rather gaudy earrings that don't seem to fit your persona.

It's your choice, anyway. He won't judge.

Still, he has to mention something about it when it catches onto a tablecloth you were napping on. (he won't judge your napping choices either don't worry)

"Is it broken?! No, it was my mom's, I can't..."

He pauses a little bit and helps you untangle it from the tablecloth.

Assures you it's not broken.

He won't ask unless you want him to.

Lilia is all too aware of loss and everything it entails. Call it intuition, or maybe something connected to his UM.

He knows that keychain of yours has a story behind it.

Some punks snatch it off your bag as a prank when you're not looking, and Lilia gets some exercise.

"Thank you so much! It's something my dad gave before..."

There's no need, really.

Everyone has a story, and he won't pry into yours.

Taglist:

@yummyyummyinmytumny @fsh1 @lemon-koii

[sasahuaa]

Leona Kingscholar as an omega

Riddle - Azul - Kalim - Vil - Idia - Malleus

GN reader; sfw (kind of? subspace is not meant to be smutty but can be perceived as foreplay depending on the reader’s wants); word count: 2601; tw: inferiority complex, possessiveness

Sunset Savanna is a very inclusive and progressive land in terms of gender, women are held in high standard and the same is with omegas, it's considered normal to have kings that are alphas, betas or omegas. So Leona was always comfortable in his own skin, his nation never made him doubt himself in his second gender, and if he heard someone in NRC with conservative ideas about gender roles he would just scoff and roll his eyes.

Perhaps, in the middle of the night when his instincts are alert, his mind would conjure a memory of some nobody saying that alphas are born to be leaders. Maybe he was disqualified from birth, never meant to surpass Falena?

Still, he wouldn't entertain such nonsense, Sunset Savanna is what matters the most, and no omega is looked down there. So there's nothing wrong with him, it couldn't be! Right?

At least he hopes so, his signature spell already is dangerous, one that Leona avoids showing to others because of the fear it brings. He can't have anything more, anything that is an intrinsic part of himself, to be unfit.

Courting

Leona's first impression of you wasn't all that positive, to say that it was memorable would be pushing it. He really didn't pay attention (nor cared enough) to the entrance ceremony, honestly, the most exciting part was a fire cat causing terror to the other housewardens and newbies.

To him, your first encounter was in the botanical garden, an inconsiderate alpha stepping on him. Leona is still an omega that came from royalty, despite being lazy, he looks after his appearance, idiotic alpha, not only being a cause of a slight pain and annoyance, you also messed with the fur of his tail.

Leona may not be as prissy about his looks as Vil, but he is proud of image.

Like an annoying bug, this alpha was determined to destroy his plans for the upcoming spelldrive tournament. And they did, begrudgingly gaining his respect.

Spending time with you while Ramshackle dorm was being used as a collateral by Azul wasn't as bothersome as he expected. In the short time that you spent together he became fond of you, of your strength, wit and kindness. Leona enjoyed the conversations and playing with you, releasing a sounding purr with his words when he won against you or you did something that he approved of.

The lion beastman, above all, adored to lay on his bed and just observe you moving across his room, organizing his desk and cleaning, he admired your form from afar, averting his gaze just in time for you to not catch him, he enjoyed your form, Leona admitted to himself this, but he wasn't ready to let you in this secret of his. He hoped you liked his too.

Leona's room smelled of you both, the scents minging with each other in a delicious combination that almost made him crawl against his walls. He considered more than one time to just kick Grim out so the smoke smell of the little nuisance wouldn't sully it.

Weeks later, periods without your constant presence made him miss you more and more, and the scary realization that maybe what he feels for this diligent alpha wasn't just physical. He doesn't know what that means, he never fell in love before, and contact besides casual intimacy was unknown to him.

His experience comes from the occasional heat partners, usually beastmen that help him through his painful heats and he never talks with again later on, people he will never miss. He expected to be the same thing with you, ask for assistance and his weird obsession with you would disappear.

But had he ever felt this way before for any of his fleeting encounters? The emptiness when you are not with him, the clammy hands and fuzzy feelings when you are nearby, the need to claim and never let others touch you?

After the realization dawned on him, he avoided you for a few days. He is good at reading people, he is aware that you are the perfect mate for him. You never treated him as a second thought, held him in high regard, and dare he say, enjoyed his company as much as he is delighted by yours.

“You are compassionate and caring, Leona, did you know that?” your words did not leave his head during his isolation span. Leona never expected to meet someone that read through him, that could see right behind the thorns and thistles of his being, and reach a pure part of him that Leona didn't know existed.

You said you admired how he cared for his dorm, his dedication to guide pups like Jack and Epel and offer words of guidance or protection, in the guise that it was his duty as a housewarden. He was… happy that you saw him this way, the tenderness of such unfamiliar to him, but welcome.

With his mind made up, he ordered Ruggie to bring you to the botanical gardens, returning to his routine with you when you have free time to spend with him. Leona may be lazy, but he puts effort in the things he is passionate about, and he is very passionate about you.

You may not notice you are courting, he never brought it up, amused to the time you eventually will figure it out. He seeks time with you and sometimes follows you around the school when you are busy with your duties, he buys you food, brings you to his room (though most is with the excuse that you need to clean it for him) and slowly blinks in your direction, isn't that obvious enough?

Beastmen omegas are in control of the relationship, the alphas can’t do anything without their permission, so he orders you to give him time and affection, trapping your body beneath him for cuddles, and if you deny something to him? Be prepared to deal with a frustrated omega. He will relent if he asks something that is a boundary to you, not wanting you to be uncomfortable, he does respect you, after all, but if you are denying him to give attention to something else bothers him to no end.

Be it from him asking, or his dorm mates' admiration of him, some Savanaclaw student is always around you, to lend you protection or to report what you are doing to him. If they see someone bothering you, this is dealt with swiftly, if you want something, Leona makes sure to attend to your needs (within reason).

He would flaunt his neck and shoulders, turning his back towards you, feeling whole if you take this as an invitation to bury your face in his body. He hopes that you know what that means, you just accepted his courting, and he anticipates that his alpha will stay with him.

Growling

To hear Leona growling is not unusual, he is bothered easily and growls whenever someone gives him a task he doesn't want to complete or orders him around.

There was a time when he used to hold back his growls, when he still had hope of becoming king and for people to see that he was the better option. As a member of royalty, he knew how to play nice. but since the realization that for them he would always be second, he stopped holding back.

His homeland became suffocating since Cheka's birth, farthering him away from the throne even more. Attending NRC was his way of escaping his family, and despite him being less stressed than before, he can't say this place is perfect.

Towards you, he growls if you try to run from him, he asked for your time in the botanical garden and he expects for you to accept, and he will continue growling until he deems you gave him sufficient attention.

Leona releases guttural noises specially if he believes someone is stealing from him what is rightfully his. Despite being a prince, he doesn't have plentiful that he could call just his, he may be gifted in athletics, but Malleus is better, he is smart and has a sense of leadership, but his subjects would always choose Falena, material things can be owned by anyone with money, recognition is what really matters to him.

So Leona is ferocious if he finds another omega trying to seduce his alpha. But most of all, he expects you to reject them, to always choose him and reassure he is the only one on your mind.

Purring

Leona purrs loudly, though he is very private about them, only the people that have his favor are privy to this sound.

If he is feeling secure in your relationship, his purr hardly stops when you both are alone. His favorite times are when you are on his bed and he is laying on top of you, his vibrations traveling from his body to yours.

When he is playing chess, the match is exciting, forcing him to think deeply about his next moves. And if you don't know how to play chess, worry not, he will play with you until you learn it. His purrs are enough motivation for you to master chess.

Leona adores physical proximity, let him lay his head on your lap, his ears will twitch in invite, wanting your hands on his hair to caress his strands or to scratch behind his ears. Cup his face on your hands, he will smirk and rub his cheeks on your palms.

Look in his eyes while doing that, tell him you love him, his purrs will become louder than a machine.

Nesting

Leona's nest is not very organized, filled with expensive blankets and pillows, a soft mattress is the base. His nest contains color tones of brown, yellow and gray, most materials have the same texture and the pillows are large so he can hug them with his whole body.

He tucked his nest in a corner, he doesn't often use a privacy screen, but he does put it on when he is feeling vulnerable and in need to hide from the rest of the world.

Leona invites you to his nest very early in the courtship, he is sure that you are his future, so the wait isn't worth it when he could have his alpha in his safe space sooner, you would enter it in the future anyway.

The lion beastman makes you scent all his materials, since you did that, he spends even more time in his nest, especially when he is missing you. In the times he goes to Ramshackle he always comes back with an article of yours, and trades with another when your smell fades away, he is also careful when choosing his new piece, he couldn't let you without your essential items.

Sometimes, Leona would wait until your classes finished so he could whisk you away to his nest. If he is in the room with you, you don't need to ask for permission to enter it, but you do need permission to leave. Anytime you try to leave, to go to the bathroom or because you need to go home, he would bite behind your neck and pull you inside again.

“Oi, who gave you permission?” He would snarl with a low growl, his alpha must coax him gently, little persuasive words, being open to receive scenting and caresses to his neck and shoulders, all that combined and Leona might be convinced.

He just checked behind your neck before you were able to go, his bite apparent for everyone to see, it wasn't a mating mark yet, but for now, it was good enough for any of your other potential suitors to avoid approaching you.

Marking

You would be drenched in Leona's scent, the other students smell more of him on you than your own scent, to the point that some people think that the Savanaclaw housewarden is passing by even when you are alone.

Leona gets smug when he sees others averting their gazes from you, for everyone to perceive your place by his side.

Besides the omega scenting you to announce his claim, it's also for his comfort and reassurance. He is scared of you leaving him, of becoming a second choice for you too.

Smelling himself on you soothes his troubled mind, you are still by his side, you still haven't stirred away, he is still your beloved, his scent is proof of that. The scenting procedure is relaxing to him, to have you in his arms while he nuzzles your head, down to your neck and collarbones, reaching more parts of your body with his wrists’ glands. In moments like this he is assured of one fact, you are his.

Subspace

Although Leona isn't insecure about his second gender, it's a rare occurrence for him to enter subspace, compared to other omegas he has a more domineering personality, and he likes to have the upper hand with his alpha too. But he also likes to concede control from time to time.

Biting and licking his neck, shoulders and back are the way to bring him to cloud nine. Leona's body immediately relaxes and becomes pliant, his tail flicks up in a show of his excitement.

His purrs are unstoppable in this state, and quite lower compared to his usual tone. Any attempts to take your mouth away from him are met with a vicious hiss and nails digging on your back.

This is the only hard rule that he will impose in moments like this, don't leave. Otherwise, Leona would let you do anything when he is like this, his omega brain only demanding attention from his alpha, and he is pleased to provide.

☽ ☼ ☾

There's a gentle breeze in the air, but the ambient is too warm. It's weird, Leona is used to Savanaclaw's temperature, however, lately his instincts are haywire. Ever since he came to terms with his feelings for that alpha he has been feeling overwhelmed.

It's too hot, too suffocating. How long has passed since he started to avoid you? He is sure it's just a few days, and yet, his heart feels far too cold in displeasure. It was cozy when he was with you.

Leona wants to snarl at himself, he couldn't believe he is infatuated by someone. But it had to be you, you have been his only exception for many things, so he isn't surprised he caught feelings, even when he never thought he was capable of such pure tenderness.

He isn't elated, though. He knows you have a liking towards him, but is it romantic? Besides him, you spend time with many others, would you put him in second place too? He couldn't imagine you being so cruel, not after the many conversations you had, not after you saw good in him, even after you witnessed the worst in him.

If you did prioritize someone else…

Leona can't even fathom the thought, he could feel the flames of jealousy burning his stomach and his heart shrinking at the image of you holding a no face in your arms.

No, this can't happen, he refuses. The most shameful kind of loser is the type that doesn't even try. If he is doomed, if he is destined to never be the first choice, at least he will trail this path with dignity, he will go down at his own accord.

But Leona doesn't know if he could take another heartbreak, so please, choose him.

[siffrin-enthusiast]

hey chat i’ve been having Thoughts about siffrin again.

tws for heavy discussions of unhealthy coping mechanisms, self-harm & suicide in the game in stars and time, spoilers for the entire game act 6 twohats etc etc. if anyone reads this and thinks of any more tws i should add, send them in and i'll add them to the top of this post.

your last warning of heavy discussions VERY unhealthy coping, the urge to and methods of physical and emotional SELF-HARM, and the weight of SUICIDE. i just want to reiterate that IT IS A LOT. use your best judgement before & while reading this post and PLEASE BE CAREFUL.

last last warning. just to be sure.

siffrin self-harms in the loops. we all know this, right? from the increasingly barbaric means they use to loop back, the glass shard they pick up and use, the bigfrin fight where your only craft skill is "(don't attack.) can't hurt them. attack the only person left" and the party visibly reacts to you using it. it's not exactly subtle.

it makes sense that the pretty popular headcanon is that siffrin doesn't drop the habit of self-harming after coming out of the loops. i agree with that, but i also think that it's not done in the way most people are thinking! let me explain.

siffrin's self-harming behavior in the loops boils down to three major (and very intertwined) truths about their situation.

siffrin does not recognize the value in his life. this has been a thing since before sif joined the party. they happened to cross paths and stepped up to defeat a "particularly strong Sadness" (and for reference, fully leveled storming the house Mirabelle gets nervous about fighting a Sadness. they will freeze you in time. they ripped out siffrin's eye in one blow. they are DANGEROUS.) and siffrin comes along to save this country because "there's nothing else for you to do". and then the loops start. siffrin realizes he can die and. well. holy fuck. we've all played the game. siffrin is literally killing himself, killing himself, for convenience because it's annoying to walk to a tear. and it's his idea!! if you do it enough times, the death text changes from (You killed yourself.) to (You saved yourself some time.) loop has a line about advising siffrin against suicide because they'll see themself as "disposable" and...yeah. yeah. they do.

siffrin will not let physical or emotional harm come to the other members of their party. again, this is something seen before the loops, when siffrin loses his eye defending bonnie from a sadness, and how they still cringe over being 'inconsiderate' to mira months ago during their travels across vaugarde. when the party panics after (just attack), siffrin loops. when the party dies in loop's hangout, siffrin loops. when bonnie is taken by the king, siffrin loops. when isa is taken aback by bad touch, siffrin loops. when odile realizes they're in a time loop in kinda sus, siffrin loops. when the party watches siffrin hurt himself in the bigfrin fight, siffrin attempts to loop. good god, there's a scene where if you try and use the dagger on your family members siffrin blames his intrusive thoughts and stabs themself. because of their intrusive thoughts. his dreams are about the fear of hurting their friends. their worst, most traumatizing moments are about other people getting hurt.

siffrin's actions in the loops are reversible. if something is done, it can be undone. it can be scripted around. their party will not know unless siffrin chooses to tell them. none of their actions have consequences. sif delights in this (until realizing beating the king doesn't free him from the loop). fuck up bonnie's friendquest? loop! miss a key? loop! say the wrong thing? loop! everyone dies horribly? loop! loop! loop!

and after the loops? let's take a moment to reevaluate siffrin's situation:

siffrin does not recognize the value of his life. still.

siffrin will not let physical or emotional harm come to the other members of their party. still.

siffrin's actions are no longer reversible. there is no time loop. what happens now happens--no second chances, no undo button. they are permanent. especially now that they've seen sif try to loop, the smell of burnt sugar that precedes it, and odile figured out how to shut it down. all of their actions have consequences.

immediately after the bigfrin fight, mira asks where sif is going and bonnie LITERALLY says "Yeah, you're stupid if you think we're leaving you to do whatever you want right now." and the party double-checks that siffrin is going to see loop before letting them run off. and then twohats happens. when siffrin gets back, isa comments "We were getting worried." in siffrin's small absence (despite knowing exactly where siffrin was, talking to loop, who the party has a favorable opinion of) and then mira calls them out directly for looking sad.

the party is watching siffrin like fucking hawks.

i fully believe that siffrin would feel the urge to self-harm. i fully believe that the party knows this too. and i think siffrin would at least suspect that the party is going to be looking very, very closely for signs of more physical self-harm.

there's a phenomenon i don't have a name for but that i've seen repeated where someone trying to recover from using an unhealthy coping mechanism can slip into using a different unhealthy coping mechanism instead. in school, perfectionism can lead to avoidance. if a person shuts down for too long, they might start acting out or doing other attention-seeking behaviors as a cry for help. and after we experience continuous trauma, a lot of people will seek out or be more attached to unhealthy relationships (of any time) and find comfort & stability in the abuse endured. obviously this isn't the case every time, and i don't even know if it's a Thing i actually read about in psychology classes or just a pattern i've been noticing! i'm no professional.

for siffrin, actions and their consequences are now permanent. so i really, really don't think he's going to self-harm unless they're 100% sure they're going to get away with it (and i doubt the opportunity will arise for months). because if the party finds out they self-harm, that breaks sif's rule of not letting physical/emotional harm come to the party. they're going to be devastated. we already saw how they acted when siffrin did it in front of them when he was using the dagger to loop, the bigfrin fight. when dagger looping, siffrin was more shaken up about watching their family watch siffrin die than the literally killing himself part. they do it in front of their party and in the bigfrin fight because he thinks he can loop back. but that is no longer siffrin's reality. the party will be devastated if siffrin hurts himself and siffrin cannot undo that hurt.

("Yeah, you're stupid if you think we're leaving you to do whatever you want right now.")

i think that since physical self-harm is banned for siffrin, he's going to subconsciously shift to emotional or at least more subtle self-harm. keeping that unhealthy emotional distance. getting angry and frustrated and bitter. overly helpful. denial and minimizing and suppressing the loops. alcoholism. dissociating from their feelings. keeping their expectations so, so soul-crushingly low. passivity. whatever was left of his self-esteem is going through a woodchipper. self-sabotage his relationships. impulsive behavior. throwing themself into the party's problems to forget his own.

little things, subtle unconscious displays of siffrin's utter loathing of himself that he thinks on some level he can get away with. that their party won't notice, won't be hurt by. there won't be consequences! no one will be hurt (except siffrin, but as previously discussed, siffrin does not value themself). the party is going to be watching; their refusal to let siffrin go to dormont alone says as much. and siffrin is not going to start opening up and becoming the coping mechanisms master; their non-mention of the fight with loop (only saying "i said thanks to loop" instead of "loop is me and also tried to kill me") says as much. there's...a long road ahead, that much is clear.

i think siffrin will eventually get better. isafrin only happened because siffrin reached out for isabeau instead of waiting on isa to do it, which i'm interpreting as a very positive sign of sif learning he has to reach out for help to receive it. it's going to be messy. it's going to take a while. but the time will pass anyways. siffrin will eventually get better.

those are just my thoughts as a non-professional. i'd love to hear other people's thinking about siffrin. if you need it, here's tumblrs official mental health resources post with resources sorted by different countries. stay safe and be well, everyone :)

[signanothername]

I have never had Twitter (and I don't plan on it) bit what happened to make you what to leave it? Or why so many people don't like it? If your willing to share ofc.

Oh my gosh I like your little text laugh its so cute and funny it makes me giggle

Well, I can’t talk for everyone but from my own experience, I deleted it cause it’s either people being extremely toxic to each other, or making fun of each other and even other people who have nothing to do with them (don’t get me started on the call out posts bullshit on there)

Like, I legitimately once saw a tweet that made fun of an artist on here (that I’m following and that is still active btw) for making a trigger warning list for their comic, a comic that is actually genuinely graphic, and the artist (being a completely normal and considerate person who simply wants everyone to stay safe) included said list in their pinned, yet people on twitter genuinely tore into them and called them “ridiculous” for including a “long” list of TWs, it was wild

And that’s only one of the things I saw on there, the negativity on there is so suffocating it genuinely made me super depressed, I decided to free myself and delete that shit

Not saying every single person on there is toxic or negative, or inconsiderate (some of my mutuals/friends I met on there and they’re the coolest) it’s just that the toxic/negative ones are louder compared to the positive people who mind their own business shsggsgs

If I ever make a twitter account again, it’ll only be to follow specific Japanese, Chinese and Korean artists that I really love the art of that are only active on there, otherwise, I’d rather burn than ever download that accursed app ever again

[rreskk]

Here he comes again

AAAA, okay, okay. So I haven't been posting as much as I want to. I know I've got so many requests (THANK YOU ALL) and I'll try my best to get through them all. College has been busy, work has been busy, I'm driving, got some people to see. It's all busy busy busy, but I'd never abandon writing :) So here is a fanfic I've been writing for the past few days. I'm saaaaddddd about losing activity, but I swear, I'll keep uploading more. THANK YOU!

Summary: He's an awkward fling with weird feelings aside. There's lots of unresolved tension that had finally been sorted through a more physical solution.

TW: -Smut

Word count: 2771

Pairings: Fem!reader/North Yankton!Trevor Philips

You met this guy back in North Yankton. Well… He was unusual, to say the least. The locals you were familiar with were all Catholic-Christians, elderly, retired, drifters. It was an unusual place within the snowy abyss. However, when you were within a mile radius of bars or hotspot strip-joints, you’d end up seeing “them” sort of people. And when you mean “them”, you really mean “him”.

Moustache, eyebrow scars, blood-stained shirt collars, 15 year old work boots, a decade’s worth of eye-bags, this grainy toothy grin, thinning hair; mullet (to be precise). Not to mention the height and state of his physique. He was tall enough to bend down through doorways but thin enough to cut through wired fences and sprint from authorities. That’s what you mean when saying “him”. He looked like he walked fresh out of a 70s porno with playgirls and tacky sluts. You didn’t like him at first. He was brash and uninviting. You’d meet through the local bar scene, and since then, he’s been repeatedly knocking offence and welcoming himself into your personal life.

He was called Trevor Philips.

You’d know because, well, you had slept with him. Many times. Most were drunk. However, though he was annoying and inconsiderate of your privacy, he was addicting. You’ve never seen a guy like him before. That manic pirate look and clothes riddled of low-quality weed and horrid body odour – it was oddly charming! Besides… His eyes were too hypnotising. You ended up growing closer, and closer, and closer, until most nights you were crying bloody murder in his rented out motel room.

Trevor was frightfully good at making sex transactable. He had a talent of pulling on your strings, angering you, then rolling around in the bedsheets to relieve the tension he playfully causes (for fun). He was also animalistic with his desires. You tried to hold many grudges against him, due to his life-style and criminality, yet he’d walk through like he owned you.

This current time was different. Trevor had mentioned going out with the guys; Michael and Bradley. You’ve never met them, nor would you want to. You both kept your social lives separate from each other to avoid merging circles and creating a land of Hell equivalent to Dante Inferno’s Divine comedy. Nonetheless, you paid no attention to his whereabouts before there was a heavy stomp at your front door. You’d answer, and no one was there. Assuming it was the youthful trouble-makers who tried to poke some fun in this town, you retreated back to bed and hugged the coffee mug close to your chest until your bedroom window clasped open.

“Fuck!” You yelped and coward in your covers.

The crispy winters air would flow and destroy the heat you had generated that day. The curtains flustered open to reveal a lanky figure crawling through the tight crack. You initially accused this of a home-invader and raised your mug to strike before their hand stopped your panicked outburst.

“Chill the fuck out!”

And you’d recognise the voice, frowning.  

“Trevor.” You spitefully spat.

He grunted when landing on your bedroom floor, ignorantly leaving the window open, freezing your cosy bedroom. He wore a green parkers coat and some worn-out joggers, which he usually wore. Every day.

“Hey, sugar.” Trevor erratically smiled and lifted his head for a kiss. But you refused.

“What the fuck are you doing – climbing through my bedroom like that?”

He defensively stood to his feet, “Woah. I came to visit and this is what I get?”

“I thought you were out with “the guys”, not creeping on me. Why didn’t you use the fucking door? Like a normal person?” You exclaimed, feeling the temperature torment your lack of clothes.

Trevor rolled his eyes sassily. He was delusional to think he had done nothing to break a boundary. He simply threw off his coat and jumped onto the bed sheets beside you. The whiff of his bodily scent sent your nostrils into a fierce flashback of world war 2 trenches.

“The window was easier to your bedroom. What’s the big fuckin’ deal? I ain’t no peeping Tom. And if I was, it would be okay since we fu– “

“Don’t finish that sentence.” You sighed.

“Oh, c’mon…” He began, “Don’t be like that. I didn’t just break my fuckin’ back to be whined and bossed around.”

“I’m not bossing you around.”

“I’m not bossing you around.” Trevor mocked in a childish voice. Your face tensed up with frustration before he giggled and crawled on top of you, his hands holding your shoulders down. You were pressed against the mattress unwillingly. You glared up at him, but it was dismissed.

“Clear your schedule, I’m horny.” He’d usher, his moustache tickling your jaw.

“Stop, don’t – “

“Mmm, fuck, you taste good.” That slimy tongue began tormenting your neck and jaw. It was such a sudden sensation that you had pushed him off, protesting something inaudible, then correcting yourself more clearly for his ears.

“Stop, enough. Please?”

“Fine, I’ll just slash my wrists then.” His tone dropped into a disturbingly low grumble. He shuffled away from your body and went to grab his coat again. You reached out, grasping his sleeve, stopping him from walking off in his usual pout. Trevor huffed and tried to resist your touch.

“Hey, hey,” You muttered, “Come here, I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Stop being fuckin’… Bipolar or whatever!” Returned his manic state, “I just want you! Fuck! Is that so much to ask?”

“Okay, I’m sorry. I’m just a little tired. It’s been a busy day.”

“Damn right it has. Been so busy you didn’t fuckin’ call me back?”

“Trevor.” You groaned.

“What? I’m sorry I’m a human with thoughts, feelings, and emotions.” He held a hand to his chest, ranting on about his subjective perspective of how you should treat him; a man-baby.

“I know you are. Now come back. You didn’t come here for nothing, right?” You’d try to urge him closer so he could refrain from having an impulsive temper meltdown, or literally slash his wrists.

“This place is so lonely. I liked it when Mikey wasn’t so cold and all. The guy turned into a real wet-wipe. And fuckin’ Brad? He’s alright. The guys a blast to party with, but I just want… I wanna cuddle, it’s been ages.” Trevor melted into your arms and stuffed his red nose (caused by either cocaine or the freezing weather) between your clothed breasts.

“We can cuddle, that’s fine – “

“Why didn’t you answer my calls anyway?” He eruptively asked.

Thinking about it now, your home telephone never rang. You’d assume he had maybe called the wrong number, but yet again, this was Trevor; he never forgets your number, or any… Weird details about your life. You’ve learn this from the 3rd hookup you both shared and he scared you with remembering your exact birthdate, timings, etc… The creepy thing was, you never told him.

“Huh? The lines might’ve been cut off.”

“There ain’t been a storm since last week.”

You nodded at him, “Yeah, but they are working near the power station – maybe they messed with the telephone lines.”

Trevor didn’t seem pleased about this and grumbled a small “fuck them” in your chest again.

“But you were too busy to call, right?” You’d wonder out loud considering a day out with “ the boys” meant 24 hours doing god knows what, with god knows who.

He went silent before breathing out a heavy weight from his shoulders and glaring down at your shirt. It took some moments to recollect his thoughts, struggling to answer when he clearly told you in the past that he hated being questioned. It wasn’t his strongest point, understanding why you even care.

“We went to the joint, took a few lines and shit then “Mr. Perfect family man” decides to blow the fuckin’ fun! I tried to give him a few more drinks but the prick refuses and sits there like a pile of turd. I called you then my crappy credit ran out, so I left – no drama, why’d you care?” And he spat out the last part aggressively.

“I was curious.”

“Oh, so you don’t care?”

You’d frown, “I do care. Why else would I be curious?”

Trevor went silent again. He gazed into your eyes, calculating your honesty, then snuffled back into your shirt before the restriction irritated him. He tugged and tugged with a petty scowl. You were too slow to react, his tongue running his mouth again.

“Your shirt is pissing me off!”

“Trevor, you need to slow it down…” Allowing him to free your chest, you’d give him a word of advice as his mood have been up and down within the past 10 minutes.

Your breasts bounced before his eyes and he pounced. Trevor’s nasty lips pecked small hickeys around your chest area when you tried to speak again. He silenced you, nipping at your nipple with his yellow teeth, smirking when you gasped sensually.

“Easy, sugar.” His warm breath bullying the crook of your neck.

Not wanting to neglect the previous conversation, you’d shakingly speak despite his horridly beautiful touch and kisses. Trevor’s head would cower even lower until he reached your tummy, licking strips and ignoring every attempt of your dismay. At this point, there was no going back. Your body relaxed against him and he seemed to appreciate your final decision – resting his chin on your stomach with a sly smirk. No words were spoken, he simply stared up at you with eyes of lust.

“What?” You hazily questioned.

“Nothin’…” Trevor continued to kiss throughout mumbling, “Just fuckin’ enjoying my girl.”

“Ah…” Your cheeks blushed, avoiding his eye-contact.

“You like that? When I call you my girl?” He grinned.

“I didn’t say anything! – “

“But your eyes did.”

You raised an eyebrow and watched him giggle.

“I saw the way you turned shy.” He continued.

“Fuck you…”

Two hands tugged at your waist, flipping you both over as you crashed down onto his groin. You’d look down at him. Trevor had positioned you on top with a cheeky smile that already told you what he wanted. Them needy hands kept patting at your hips and ass, encouraging you to play along with his giddiness.

“I like the sound of that,” His voice husky due to your weight on his lower stomach, “I like that a lot.”

Suddenly, the room had gotten extremely heated, even through the baring window that squirted cold, crispy air. Maybe it was his body heat that had made you begin to sweat through your bra and loose trousers. Your forehead glistened with this sweat, and it caught his eye. He too was fairly humid as the white shirt closely hugged his body, not enough to print his sweat though.

“Stay still.”

His instruction had made you sit steady on his lap before you felt the slimy surface of his tongue wiping away the extract of your sweat. Trevor had sat up just to taste your forehead, and he smirked once you pushed him back against the bed. Them hands around your ass only grew heavier, groping you hard.

“Slow down!” You protested with a soft laugh.

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

“Oh, but I did.”

Trevor’s nose twitched at your playfulness. He sceptically analysed you like a game.

“Maybe you did.” There was a hint of uncertainty behind his voice.

“And are you gonna comply?”

The question was left hanging as he handled you manically, trying to avoid this confrontation that had made him… Excited. Very excited.

“Trevor.” Your stern voice sent shivers down his spine.

“Yeah, what? – “

“And you gonna do what I tell you?”

He nibbled his bottom lip, “Maybe.”

“Sorry, what was that?”

“I said maybe.”

“What does maybe mean?”

“Fuck…” He was visibly impatient, “It means… Fuckin’… Whatever! It means yes! Fucks sake.”

You had finally overcame the barrier of his stubbornness. Trevor pouted until you had leaned down, hungrily kissing his lips to exile the unwanted tension spurting from the overall situation. He immediately kissed back and puffed out breathes with arousal. Your ass was slapped, back was clawed, lips swollen red. Although you have the upper hand by being on top, it didn’t stop him from holding you against his raging boner, guiding your hips to smoothen the twitchy mess.

“Yeahhh.” Sweet moans left his throat at this friction created between your trousers. It vibrated through the kiss as you inhaled every savour of his fragile state.

“C’mon, I want you.” You whispered when dry riding his crotch. Repeating these dirty pleads had made him melt rotten. Trevor’s mouth was wide open and he was reached for your waist. It was like the arousal had restrained his mobility. 

 In momentary time, his cock was freed and you were massaging the last of his pre-cum to ooze away so the time was ready for a full physical. His fingers intertwined with your free hand, a comforting gesture he rarely ever did. It was a weird feeling – but you liked it. This random hookup felt more personal and intimate. Trevor basically guided you by the hips, praising as you slowly sat on his penis and making him gasp out a heavy, abnormal parody of painful moans. You used his shoulders for stability when you began riding him.

He was loud, obnoxious. Every time you moaned yourself, his one happened to echo throughout your bedroom, and it wasn’t even a big, nor empty room. It was exciting to hear. Trevor moaned your name consistently and begged for more of your touch whenever your pussy suffocated his desperate cock. His shirt that was once hogging his body was actually reeked with sweat. His face was blushed and neck drooling with the sweat produced overtime. You’d occasional wipe it with your thumb but he stopped you, wanting all your focus on him, nothing else.

“That’s it, that’s fuckin’ it! Christ, fuck! Oh YES!” He’d cry out.

“Trevor, oh… God.”

He kept guiding you onto his cock, bounce after bounce. With quick momentum, Trevor’s body jerked as a result of the troubling orgasm arriving. He watched your tits flap, hips crash against his, eyes roll back. When you were gasping for air as you rode his erection, his lips eagerly kissed up and down your neck, pestering you with unlimited love.

“Trevor… Trevor!” Your pitch increasing due to the intensity.

“I love you, fuckin’… Ah! – “ His palms sweating, “I love you, I love you!”

The grip around your hips loosened and he fell backwards onto the mattress. His eyes closed and chest inhaling sharply. Your whole pussy shuddered when his cock trembled, semen spurting out deep inside you. It was a sharp shot, the heat growing more inside. Trevor was immensely weak from the orgasm. Throughout the distorted moans of your name, he forced you to continue riding through the climax. He ignored his own cum running down your thighs and his penis. He ignored it all, instead, he kept his full sets of eyes on you.

“C’mon…”

You dug your fingernails into his shoulders and cried –

“Trevor! I’m gonna! – “

“That’s it, cum for me.”

“Trevor!”

He huskily growled, “C’mon, [y/n]… Atta girl.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck! Ah!” You mounted his cock with your wettened sex. Your pussy cuddled the tip nicely, coating the remaining skin sticky with your fluids.

“Ohhh… That’s right, perfect…”

“Fuck,” You were out of breath, “God, it felt so good.”

“Didn’t it, sugar?” Trevor pulled you into his embrace. Your forehead brushed against his moustache, your breathing growing slow together after the climax had passed by.  He placed his chin upon your head and murmured once again;

“Mm, I wanna stay the night.”

“You wanna stay the night here?”

“Yes.”

You nodded, “Yeah, yeah… Alright.”

“Good, ‘cause you ain’t got a double bed for nothin’.” He muttered.

“What’s the muttering for?”

“What’s the muttering for?” You were mocked once again.

You’d roll your eyes and offer him more place on the bed. Trevor smirked, hogging as much of the duvets when giving you a wink.

“Maybe I can stay the night after – as well?”

“Don’t get your hopes too high.”

[multi-kpop-fanfics]

tw: insecurities, crying, fear of failure and self - doubt, cursing, mentions of inconsiderate people, kissing, friends to lovers!AU

You want to disappear from the face of Earth.

The past few months have been hell for you and today was probably the last straw - as if you weren't already on the brink of a mental breakdown, your best friend decided to chew you out for not having the emotional capacity to listen to her rambles about her boyfriend standing her up on their latest date.

It has been an hour since you left the cafeteria in tears and about half an hour since Seungkwan stopped by your apartment to provide some much needed comfort.

"Shhh, it's okay, love," he holds you close to his chest, his arms securely wrapped around you, "You have every right to be upset."

"I just... Don't fucking get it," you sniffle, "It's like I'm a walking bad luck charm at this point."

"That's not true at all, Y/N-"

"How?! Nothing has been going well for the past three months!" You scream, "And nobody gives a fuck about how I feel - Hell, I don't even give a fuck about how I feel!"

Something in your words feels like a double-edged knife piercing through Seungkwan's heart - he knows you're in pain, but he hates seeing you in such a sorry state.

"Look at me," he turns your head to face him, his hands caging your cheeks as he's trying to shake you awake from a nightmare, "Stop giving importance to people and things that don't deserve it."

"And who should I give importance to, huh?!"

"YOU! Your fucking self, Y/N!" He yells, eyes screaming to hold back the rapidly forming tears, "Fuck the others, fuck the world! If they can't be nice to you, then you should be nice to you!"

You let out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding all this time and you let yourself fall forward, pressing a quiet kiss on your friend's lips.

Seungkwan is caught off guard, but he lets himself fall into it, enjoy the comfortable silence that has now fallen in the room.

"I'm sorry," you break contact and wipe your cheeks, "I shouldn't have lashed out like that, let alone do...whatever I did just now."

"You're right," he smiles and caresses your bottom lip with his thumb, "You shouldn't have lashed out like that."

You let out a choked laugh and Seungkwan inches closer to you.

"Although I wouldn't say no to another kiss."

[jiamour]

💿 now playing: pushin’ n pullin’

povs: 💗-yn, 🖤-js, 💛-rj, 💙-jn, 🧡-mk, 💜-dh, ❤️-jm, 💚-cl

track 21: literally just a rensung fight

guitarist!jisung x reader

album tracklist

a/n: i’m procrastinating here’s whatever this is

tw: past emotional abuse mentioned, cheating, etc. all that kinda stuff, emotional breakdowns, dissociation x 2

word count: 2.8k

-

-

music: norman fucking rockwell x 10

all renjun wants is a spark. he wants fireworks to go off when he kisses someone. he wants to open his eyes after and see unadulterated fondness directed back at him. and all he gets is jisung.

jisung’s complicated. no matter how close they are, he’s a million miles away. he’s inconsiderate, detached, a certified deadbeat in the works. but, sometimes he’s so warm. sometimes, he’ll know just what to say, just where to touch, just what to do to make renjun feel wanted. it’ll grab him by the heart strings and pull him along and he can’t help but willing chase after fleeting moments of hope.

love hasn’t been very kind and yet he falls head first too quickly and too strongly without heeding the cautions of unreciprocity. he’s strung along because he cares and he listens and he loves and people like to use and drain and discard. but despite everything, he knows the love he’s looking for is out there. so he still holds hope that some of that love will be directed at him .

just recently, jeno had told him that the first time they kissed mark, marks heart raced so fast he had to sit down on the floor to catch his breath. he got so embarrassed his whole body was hot to the touch and he refused to look at jeno for the rest of the night in the fear he would die of infatuation.

renjun longs for that. he wants someone to love him so much they start to deteriorate physiologically. or maybe just a skip of a heartbeat, he’ll take any amount, he’s never been very picky.

at the moment, his mental ‘love me’ messages are on overdrive. he’s firing them in every direction but somehow they’re managing to swerve around the boy who’s tongue is down his throat.

he’s in jisung’s bed, the comforter tossed messily to the side, jisungs hands running down his body, and he feels gross. he doesn’t want to be here, he doesn’t want to do this. he knows he can just get up and leave any time he wants to but he also doesn’t exactly want it to stop.

it started off good. jisung was more attentive than usual, probably due to the outburst earlier. he wanted to believe it was because he cares but he knew it was just a strategy to avoid talking through any kind of emotional baggage.

the buzz of jisungs phone rings in his ears and he can’t get past the brutal irony that it’s the same as his ex’s. jisung pulls a hand away and renjun watches as he puts in his passcode to unlock his phone for the nth time that night. jisung smiles in a way he’s never smiled at renjun as he types back a response and renjun feels sick. the night started off so well but now he just wants to shower and wash this day off.

“who are you talking to?” renjun asks as nonchalant as he can manage.

“hmm?” jisung bites his bottom lip trying to suppress his smile as he answers, “it’s no one. don’t worry about it.”

alarm bells ring in renjuns head he can hear those exact words in an all to familiar tone “it’s no one.” “you sound crazy.” “stop over reacting.”

jisung drops his phone face down back on the bed and leans back in to kiss renjun. renjun cant even close his eyes, feeling a daze over take him. jisungs phone buzzes once, then twice.

renjuns chest squeezes, he can’t breathe, it hurts, it hurts so bad. he needs this over.

“stop,” renjun mumbles against jisungs lips and when he doesn’t get an immediate reaction he pushes against jisungs chest weakly.

“stop,” he says louder, his breath heavy and uneven. jisung pulls back with a look mixed with concern and confusion.

“you okay?” jisung asks and renjun flops flat on his back so he doesn’t have to look him in the eyes.

“yeah i-“ his voice cracks and he clears his throat, “no. sorry, i just needed to stop.”

“that’s okay,” jisung hums softly like he cares but the continuous buzz of his phone keeps renjun from believing that, “don’t apologize, do you want to talk about it?”

“i just- i don’t know- i feel lightheaded,” renjun says, it’s only partially a lie. he can’t tell the full truth without sounding possessive and crazy, “is it okay if we don’t do anything else tonight?

“yes, of course it is. whatever you want,” jisung answers immediately and moves further away from renjun on the bed, reaching down to the ground to pick up his shirt and pull it over his head, “do you want me to go get you some water? it might help.”

“yes please,” renjun answers, hoping he’s able to sneak in a quick few tears without jisung noticing.

he takes a few deep breathes once jisung leaves the room and stares at the door. he wants to leave but at the same time he doesn’t and it’s all so fucking confusing.

jisungs phone lays face down on the bed beside him. always, always, face down. it annoys the hell of renjun, it’s like a reminder that something is being hidden from him.

he can’t get the picture of a phone being slammed down as soon as he enters a room out of his head. the overtly suspicious “you’re home early”’s. the roll over in bed to grab at a phone as soon as renjun closed his eyes to sleep.

“it’s no one renjun, you’re being crazy,” he can practically hear, his ex’s annoyance pictured behind his eyelids everytime he blinked. “he’s no one, can you even hear yourself right now? do i ever comment on your friendship with chenle? when you’re literally letting him live with you. am i not allowed to have friends now?”

renjun wants to scream, he needs these thoughts out of his head, he needs to stop reliving the same memories over and over again. he needs to see what jisung was laughing about on his phone.

he picks it up and stares at the lock screen that lights up as soon as it registers his face. if he does this, there’s no going back, he’ll be the crazy one again. he’ll be the problem. the phone buzzes with a text notification. renjun takes a deep breath and swipes.

he puts in the passcode he watched jisung use earlier, ‘66666666’. the passcode alone messes with renjuns head, sending too many mixed messages. the length was suspicious but the string of repeating numbers made it seem like he had nothing to hide, or maybe he was just an idiot.

it doesn’t take renjun very long to find exactly what he didn’t want to see.

‘we’re in this together,” fucking bullshit. he feels like an idiot for falling for any of it. it’s embarrassing the way his hands shake and his vision blurs with tears over something that had been so obvious.

renjun takes a deep breath. he wants to smash the screen of the phone on the corner of jisungs bed side table, his knuckles turn white with restraint. he can’t do that. then he’d be the crazy one again, then he’d be the problem. too overbearing, too emotional, too needy, too invasive.

‘jesus fucking christ you’re so fucking needy, do you know how exhausting it is to be with you?’

his chest feels heavy but he can’t stop scrolling through conversations that make him sick to his stomach.

‘i wouldn’t do that to you. you think so little of me. i don’t get it, if i’m so fucking horrible why are you even still here?’

‘you sound so insane right now. genuinely, i think you need to get some help. i’m worried about you.’

‘baby come on you know i love you.”

renjun squeezes his eyes shut, attempting to pull himself out of his head not wanting to spiral back to rock bottom.

‘let it go, holy shit. no wonder you only have one friend who doesn’t even talk to you anymore.’

‘i didn’t mean it. i forgot how sensitive you are.’

‘stop crying, you’re so manipulative.’

‘if you actually believe that, it’s over, for good.’

‘i love you.’

‘you’re actually insane.’

‘what are you doing? is that my phone?’

“is that my phone?”

renjun snaps back into reality. jisung’s standing in the doorway looking confused, a glass of water in one hand and a pack of scooby doo gummies from jeno’s secret supply in the other.

he freezes like a deer in headlights, dropping jisungs phone into his lap. he opens his mouth to explain but he doesn’t make a sound, every word gets caught in his throat and comes out in a pathetic whimper.

“what the fuck?” jisung laughs awkwardly, “that’s like really not cool man.”

jisung enters the room and every step closer leaves renjun shaking with uncertainty.

“i was- i- you-“ he tries. he wants to diffuse this, it’s been a while since he’s felt this unsafe. it’s a carnal fear that leaves him seconds away from puking his guts out onto the floor as he’s viciously torn into by teeth that have an intention to kill.

jisung places the glass of water and pack of gummies on the bed side table and grabs his phone. he looks disgusted but harmless and somehow that makes renjun feel a whole different kind of bad. he’s the gross one, he’s the one in the wrong, he’s the crazy one.

“you were texting and i- you’re seeing other people.” renjuns teeth chatter with the accusation.

“so?”

oh. that one was new.

‘so.’ renjun blinks.

jisungs single word pushes along the gears in his mind until it gets caught between the cogs sending everything up in smoke.

so?

so.

‘so,’ renjun mouths the word to himself and stares back and jisung with hollow eyes.

“this is so fucked up,” jisung sighs, sounding almost sad, which at the moment made absolutely no sense to renjuns malfunctioning mind, “renjun, this is fucked.”

he feels like a child being scolded, shaking and crying while being stood over by someone completely unaffected.

“i’m trying really hard not to freak right now, jesus fucking christ,” jisungs never been meticulous with his words, they’re never thought out or practiced, a stark difference from his ex but it still all feels so sickeningly similar.

“i just-“ renjun cracks, and then stops, he just what? what could possibly keep him from getting ‘broken up’ with?

jisungs waiting for him to finish but he doesn’t know how to- he doesn’t even know why he started in the first place.

“i thought i was clear,” jisung frowns, “i thought we were on the same page.”

‘HOW?’ renjun wants to yell. he doesn’t. he can’t. ‘how can you be that emotionally inept?’

he’s been practically screaming on the top of his lungs how in love he was, how much he wanted this. how could he have been so misunderstood?

“you’re not my boyfriend.” jisung stabs the dagger in, renjun should have been prepared, he had months to prepare for this but it still winds him. “you know that right? i thought i made that clear. i thought-“

jisung goes silent for a second and renjun watches the paced out rise and fall of his chest, “man- i’m trying not to shut down.”

renjun doesn’t understand why his voice sounds so strained but he can tell that he hurt him. and it’s unfair. because why does he get to hurt? why does he get to be upset when he doesn’t even care?

“okay,” jisung breathes out and looks at him with cold eyes, “i want to make this clear. we are not dating. you are not my boyfriend. you will never be my boyfriend. do you understand that?”

renjun nods his head pretending the rejection doesn’t hurt like a vat of ice water being dropped on his head.

“and you cant just go through my phone. what the fuck? even if you were my bo- no actually we’re not even making it a hypothetical because it’s not going to fucking happen. ever.” jisung was staring daggers into his eyes and all he could do was blink and try not to crumble in on himself, “don’t fucking do shit like that. god. this is so fucking fucked.”

“did you-“ renjuns voice is barely about a whisper and cracks so viciously it hurts, “did you not like me at all? even a little bit?”

“no. jesus fuck- no.” he doesn’t even hesitate to answer, “and even if i did- which i don’t- that doesn’t give you the right-“

“god jisung,” renjun struggles, wiping tears away with the back of his hand, “you’re such an asshole.”

renjun hates how angry he feels, he hates how it’s bubbling up inside of him making him feel out of control. the emotional soup in his head make it hard to keep a hold of himself and his temper but he can’t yell then he’s the irrational one. then he’s crazy for being hurt, then it’s all his fault.

“i’m an asshole?” he’s so icy now and it terrifies renjun that he’s been locked out, probably for good this time, “i didn’t do anything wrong.”

jisung speaks like he’s trying to reassure himself, like renjun isn’t even there, “i made it clear what we were. i did nothing-“

“i’m- man- can you-“ jisung takes a couple breaths, trying not to fade away, “get out. i don’t want to do this right now, just get out.”

that shatters all the anger in renjun. he’s back to utter terror, he can’t leave. he can’t. he needs to fix this, he needs to do something.

he knows once he leaves this is over. he’ll be hated, he’ll be crazy, he’ll be just another story to laugh at with friends.

“please,” renjun whispers, “i’m sorry, can we please just talk about this, please.”

“there’s nothing to talk about.”

“no please there is. i get it. i understand. there’s nothing between us! i can be okay with that, i promise. please don’t make me leave. we can fix this.” he pushes himself up to his knees and grabs at jisungs wrists as he begs.

jisung looks down at his hands, he doesn’t pull away, he doesn’t do anything.

“please,” renjun knows he’s probably yelling now, his words barely comprehensible, just the sounds of agony and panic, “don’t do this. i’ll be better, i’ll change, i’ll do whatever you say, i promise, i promise, i promise please-“

his begging ends in a hiccup and he has to stop everything in an attempt to not vomit.

jisung sighs and shakes renjuns hold off, it was so tight it left red imprints.

“hey,” he says softly, and places a hand on renjuns head, stroking his hair gently, “you should have just told me.”

he hates this so much, he hates that he’s so pathetic jisung has to take pity on him, and he can’t help but sob harder.

“when you started to catch feelings and it got too hard for you, you should have told me and we could have called it off early,” jisung removes his hand and renjun already misses it.

“please,” is all he can muster.

jisung pushes the glass of water closer to him, “take some time to calm yourself down, drink some water,” he instructs and renjun nods, taking the glass from the nightstand. his hands shake so vigorously some of the water finds its way onto the bed and floor.

“i’ll leave you alone for a bit to calm down and then i’d like for you to leave,” jisung turns his back on him for what feels like the last time and walks towards the door, not even sparing a glance back as he starts to close it, “and try not to snoop through anything else on your way out, if that’s possible.”

the door clicks shut and renjun breaks down, worse than he has in over a year. he feels all of the progress he’s made recovering from his ex crumbling down. it hurts so fucking bad, all over, it’s an unavoidable pain he couldn’t even hide from.

he sits there and he cries, he wails, his cheeks are streaked in red and snot drips down to his lips. he knows he looks disgusting but he feels disgusting so he doesn’t make a move to fix it. it’s all guttural and too dramatic for a boy he isn’t even dating, but he can’t help it and he cant shut of the alarm bells in his mind telling him his life was over.

“please,” he cries out, to no one. his limbs feel numb and he hears a smash of a glass on the ground, he hadn’t even noticed he dropped it.

“please,” he whispers again, and curls himself into a ball.

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

What are those riots about in your country at the moment? I keep seeing about it online but I don’t understand what it’s about

Feel free to ignore, sorry if its an uncomfortable question

possible tw undercut —

I’ll summarise it best as can, but did you hear about those stabbings about those three little girls at a taylor swift dance club/ event?

basically someone/ people online gave misinformation about the killers race. they said the boy (the killer) was muslim when he in fact wasn’t. he’s black and his parents are from rwanda (which is a predominantly christian country. im saying this bc it ties in later)

so these far right extremists (white supremacists) are all up in arms bc they hate anyone that isn’t white basically. so these extremists (essentially terrorists) have been rioting ‘because of the girls that were killed’ except that’s utter bollocks bc they attended a vigil for these girls and were rowdy, drunk, destructive pieces of scum. they rioted at the vigil and were being incredibly inconsiderate to the lives lost while simultaneously pushing their racist political agenda (btw most traveled from neighbouring cities, so they’re not even members of the community, and had no ties or connection to the girls)

so they turn up wearing english flags, carrying crates of beer and chanting racist things and destroying things. they destroyed mosques and places of worship and are basically terrorising poc simply bc they’re ’not english’

and then since then there’s been tonnes of riots in dozens of cities where they’ve been setting things on fire, throwing fireworks at the police, destroying buildings etc. seen ambulances and police cars set on fire in the street, properties damaged, poc of colour getting attacked and stabbed

there’s a thing going around about dates and cities for these riots. it’s truly horrible

talking of which, please be careful anyone that lives in or near those cities🤍

[petewentzsvaginabones]

TW: VENT!!

had a meltdown at the fair and my mom said “stop shaking like a weirdo, you’re embarrassing me” sorry mother, i’m just trying to keep myself from punching myself in the head because i’m so fucking overstimulated that i don’t know what to do with myself.

anywayyyy, she got really mad and kept telling me that i embarrassed her, that i was inconsiderate and i need to think about other peoples needs and not just my own. i had clearly communicated HOURS ago that i was ready to leave but by this point it was 3pm, i hadn’t eaten anything all day (and couldn’t eat because i was so overwhelmed) i was beyond hot, and everything was too fucking loud (ex. the marching band, kids screaming, rides, fans, ect.)

[zenosyneee]

Chapter 3: The Mirror, The Apple, and The Vision

This chapter borrows themes from Grimm's Fairytales, and Hans Christian Anderson's The Little Mermaid. Raphael, the son of Mephistopheles is a prince of sorts, if that makes sense? We discover a lot more about the siren and her dark urge, along with Astarion's motivations moving forward.

I'd like to thank @bloody-cute-yandere for helping me come up with a lot of the ideas in this chapter. You're the best!

I still haven't decided on a title- maybe something simple like The Siren and the Vampire? Let me know what you think!

TW for language, adult themes, blood and violence.

“The only way we can bring her to safety is if we face the hag herself!” Wyll shouted, arms crossed. He was pacing in front of the fire at camp while the others thought intensely. The silence was thick, and there was tension in the air among the party members.

When Zenosyne had fallen into a deep slumber and the once bitten apple fell with a hollow thud in the grass, the hag hastily appeared. The bark of the large tree morphed ever so slightly before their eyes. A hunched creature with broken sticks in her hair and long clawed fingers separated from its thick trunk. She retrieved the siren with a deafening cackle and disappeared in a shimmering green cloud of fog. They hadn’t seen her since.

Gale was silently racking his brain for all the knowledge he could muster on hags and their tricks. Lae’zel had chided him for not knowing more off the top of his head.

“Tch’k! Have your brains been scrambled since the parasite took up residence there? I would have expected the ‘well-read wizard’ to know these things.”

Shadowheart sat with her cheek rested on her open palm, slouching forward with a pensive look etched into her brow.

Astarion lay quietly on his back, facing the stars as he tossed an apple in the air, then caught it, repeatedly. His other arm rested curled behind his silver locs.

Karlach stood back from the flames, warm enough already from her own furnace of a heart.

“I don’t think she had a clue she was a siren.” Karlach said, hands on her hips. She looked at the ground and kicked the dirt nervously. “I don’t think she was trying to deceive us, is what I’m trying to say.”

“There was a time I would have slain her on the spot- but, as we’ve established, these are unusual times, and I’m finding allies in the most unlikely of people.” Wyll added.

Astarion grimaced at Wyll’s words. He knew Wyll would have slain him too, at one point- but it was rather inconsiderate to keep brining up the fact.

“I suppose you’re doing many of us a favor, then, not cutting our throats in our sleep. Is that what you’re saying?” He asked pointedly, but his face still lazily looked up at the stars- eyes following the apple as it made its way back down to his hand. Were it not for his sharp words he would have seemed altogether unbothered.

“Let’s not argue, Astarion, when we have more pressing matters at hand.”

“Yes, let’s not.” Astarion echoed.

“I have to agree, Karlach.” Shadowheart inserted herself into the conversation in hopes of breaking some of the growing tension. “I don’t think she knew any more than we did. That’s… not the parasite’s doing, either. I may not have memories… but I know why my memories are gone. The rest of you know who you are and remember your past.” She sighed, “I think we should go back for her.”

“Her bloodlust is a danger to us all- she clearly has trouble keeping it in check. If she cannot keep herself in line, then perhaps it is a good thing that she is gone.” Lae’zel stated coldly.

“Coming from the Githyanki, that is quite the statement” Shadowheart murmured. It would seem she tried to break up tensions only to create her own.

“I keep my blades sharp, but I do not strike without purpose, Shadowheart.” Lae’zel’s tone never changed.

Gale finally spoke up,

“Those talking sheep were clearly some kind of illusion. We have to find out exactly how much of our surroundings back there were illusory. I can try to dispel the magic, but ultimately, we will have to find the hag’s hiding place. Finding a way to wake Zenosyne will be another matter altogether.”

There was another heavy silence.

“That is to say, I do intend to go back there. I think she is a formidable ally, one whose favor we would do well to keep.” Gale added.

“I agree!” Astarion exclaimed. “She was able to turn a Gur into a drooling mess in seconds. That’s a skill we could use to our benefit in the future.” He let out a throaty laugh. “Hah, the way he walked into the river without question. Right into her blade.”

Though he looked calm, Astarion's mind was moving quickly and in many directions. With each toss of the apple into the air he was met with a new question. Zenosyne was powerful, he thought to himself, and she had no idea. That was a dangerous thing. To be able to control other beings with ease and make them bend to your will- it had taken him the better part of 200 years to be able to charm and seduce people with ease, and even then, he couldn’t convince someone to walk without question into his blade. Yes, she was gifted, and he would be sure that her gifts worked to protect him. Its just a matter of charming her instead of the other way around... he thought.

After all, he had absently complimented her upon their first meeting on the wrecked beach. Her naïve smile had spoken volumes more than the few words she stuttered afterwards. It should be simple enough, Astarion thought to himself.

“But will she turn her siren’s gaze towards us?” Wyll thought out loud, breaking Astarion’s train of thought.

“I don’t think she would.” Karlach said firmly. “She’s just as confused as the rest of us, if not more. I genuinely think anyone thick enough to bite into a mysterious hag’s apple without question is probably not a devious mastermind.”

“At first light, we go then.” Gale said firmly.

_________

Single file, the party quietly made their way to the spot where Zenosyne had been taken by the hag, Ethel. Two of the sheep stood facing each other, as if staring one another down. Certainly not typical sheep behavior.

Gale quietly whispered a few words, and like a great paintbrush was pulling away strokes of wet paint from a canvas, the bright and beautiful glade became a muggy and damp swamp. The sheep were redcaps in disguise. Evil fae creatures that followed Ethel around in their sweet disguises. They seemed to be altogether oblivious to the fact that they had been discovered.

“Baa” one of them said.

Stepping through the thick mud one by one, the party finally laid their eyes upon the hag’s home. It resembled the creature herself, overgrown with vines and moss. It smelled faintly like sulfurous eggs.

Stepping up on to the steps of the hag’s home, the door wide open- Astarion cautiously peeked inside. Usually, an invitation was required for him to cross the threshold of someone’s house. It seemed that walking in the sun was not the only freedom he could now enjoy thanks to the wriggling worm in his brain.

Perhaps if we wake her up, and rescue her, I can sweep in and begin my charming little act. He thought, She seems a bit like the empty-headed fairytale type. Granted, empty headed and extremely dangerous.

“There’s no hag here.” Karlach said, cautiously. “But those coals near the hearth are still warm.”

“It’s a false wall.” Astarion said passively, as though it were obvious. The others turned to him in surprise.

“What? You can’t tell? Look at those bricks. They don’t match the ones behind it, and it’s set out just a bit too far to be a simple hearth.” He explained. “Tsk. Honestly, it’s a wonder that you all could find your way back to camp.”

Karlach pushed the still warm bricks until they budged gently. “He’s right” she said, and with a great swing of her hammer, the wall came tumbling down to reveal a dark and moldy passageway. They descended carefully into the musty, odiferous stairway into a damp and uninviting cave. Green light occasionally glowing just enough to give them guidance on where to step.

“You’ve come to retrieve the little mermaid, then?” A chilling voice rose up from the cave walls. Auntie Ethel. It seemed to permeate through the rocks and echo from every direction. At the end of the tunnel was a room of sorts- a table with alchemy ingredients spread lazily about, and just past it- a large, ornate mirror that showed no reflection.

“Hush” the disembodied voice continued, “She dreams now.”

The mirror looked as though it were a window to the ocean. Waves crashed inside, and a tiny glow was suddenly visible within the chaos. The glow became brighter, and brighter, until finally it pushed aside the waves and the vision of Zenosyne was shown. She was asleep, dreaming deeply. Now, her minds eye was opened and her dreams were visible.

Zenosyne cradled a beautiful jewelry box in her hands, sifting through the contents with an empty and distant stare.

“Gods, all I have of the beauty from the world up there is in this room.” She mused, and hummed a quiet melody. “I bet you up there, they don’t reprimand their daughters for being kind.”

An unnaturally pale woman with swirls of red that danced with otherworldly magic on her skin lay on her stomach, thumbing through the pages of an old book with little interest. Her hair was in a long, blonde braid that snaked down her back. A large, beautiful bed made atop the open face of an opalescent shell came into view. The room’s beauty was beyond description. There were glass ornaments everywhere. Colors of green, blue, pink and purple shimmered in the glow of the dim light from above like stars. Jewelry was strewn without care on the vanity, on a lavish table, on the nightstand by the elegant bed- beautiful, ornate bottles that held unknown things were organized loosely beside her on the vanity, and several mother of pearl combs were laid out neatly in a row. In the middle of the room was a glistening pool that made the colors around her dance vividly in its reflection. Silk skirts and beaded fabrics peeked out from a massive wardrobe carved from light blue marble.

“You have everything you need down here.” The pale girl said, clearly annoyed. White, empty eyes finally meeting Zenosyne’s back. “The least you could do is put in the effort to make father proud. Just one or two souls and I’m sure he’d be just thrilled.” She rolled her eyes in disdain.

At the word father, Zenosyne flinched.

“I mean…” She went on, “I bring in the trophies of the slain every day. You don’t even lift a finger to do his bidding. And yet here you are… favored…. Somehow.” There was hostility and passive aggression in her voice.

Zenosyne was clearly thinking, but she decided against speaking out. Suddenly, a very small creature that was clearly from the hells emerged from the massive doors to her room. She looked at the eccentric, frankly horrifyingly grotesque creature through the mirror.

“Sceleritas Vel” She said, “Any news?”

“Just that your father wishes you to emerge from your room, your highness. Prince Raphael will be leaving soon.” His voice was respectful and refined despite his appearance.

“I don’t want to see Raphael, just bid him farewell for me.” Zenosyne said in a depressed tone.

“Highness, Your father wishes you to at least come out for yourself. His lordship, Prince Raphael, seemed very pleased to see you.” Sceleritas said, clawed, thin hands clasped together tightly.

“Very pleased indeed” The pale woman tossed the book over her shoulder, and it landed on a silk pillow. “Don’t fuck this one up, please, Zeno. He is the son of Mephistopheles. Do you know how many—”

“Enough, Orin! Out of here, both of you!” Zenosyne said, both hands up in the air. She sat up straighter but her back remained turned to them. Her voice was oddly melodic and soft for someone who was trapped within the hells. Perhaps that was part of her siren’s instincts. “I will have none of this.”

Once they had cleared from her room, Zenosyne let out a deep, pained sigh.

“Some charming prince.” She muttered, sarcastically.

The vision from the mirror went dark, and they were all left in silence. Shadowheart blinked a few times in disbelief.

“She was trapped in the hells? All along?” Karlach whispered, “A bit like myself… Just treated much, much better.”

Astarion swallowed, finding it difficult to place the feelings he was experiencing. She was just as sweet as she seemed to be, and she was destined to be held in the beautiful prison her father had made for her. No wonder she was drawn to death and destruction- she was from the hells. He did not want to think about what would happen if this “father” of hers showed up. Did he feel guilt? Or was it fear? She clearly fought against her nature and tried to be kind in the face of others’ disapproval.

No, he would stick to his plan, he decided. He would make sure "her highness" thought highly of him. She clearly wanted a proper dashing hero to help her out. I could play that part, he thought to himself, pushing away the other details. I’ll worry about the rest of the of the plan later.

With no warning, the hag emerged from behind them, reaching out a gnarled claw.

Zenosyne was visible just beyond her- in a quiet alcove. She was laid out on a stone table, quietly resting as if she were still beneath the apple tree.

Gale lifted his voice, casting mage armour on himself. Karlach wasted no time in lunging forward, crying out in rage with her terrifying might. Her hammer came down upon the hag, right through her, then down upon the ground where the hag was standing. She had suddenly disappeared into a cloudy haze. The hag let out a high pitched cackle at the attempt.

“My little mermaid has so many secrets! What a fine price she’d fetch if only her daddy knew where she was. Or maybe even that prince!” Ethel mused.

An arrow whizzed by Karlach’s ear. With a loud twang, Astarion’s bow fired. The hag jumped out of the way just in time, her shrill laugh making them all grimace in pain.

A fireball came hurling at them all, singing their clothing in a bright blaze. Karlach was undeterred and tumbled through the inferno- crying out with resolve. While the hag finished her spell, Karlach landed a heavy blow- on the real hag this time. She had not been expecting such a quick recovery from her opponent.

Ethel tumbled back, and in her confusion, Gale aimed an ice knife in her direction. It pierced her just in time, before she could run away from Karlach.

Shadowheart aimed a glowing guiding bolt towards her, but it landed on cold stone.

“Where is she?” Shadowheart cried out. The others looked around nervously, panting from the exertion.

“Awww, Did the rat catcher want to be the handsome prince? Did he want to be the hero?” Ethel's voice teased. The others weren't sure to whom she was referring, but Astarion spoke up anyway.

“I AM handsome, thank you” He spat with fury in his voice. He would not give the hag the pleasure of believing she could insult him.

The hag reappeared, and with a great swing of her staff, knocked Gale off his feet. Wyll took the opportunity to bring his sword down on her gangly arm, and with a crunch of bones she wailed. Lae’zel leapt onto the table. She knocked the roots and herbs out from under het feet, and jumped into the air, arms drawn back, ready to strike the hag. She landed with a tearing sound onto Ethel’s hunched form, but was flung off to the side. Lae’zel landed nearby, the air knocked out of her lungs.

Very mortally wounded now, Ethel screamed out a curse- but before she could summon any horrific creatures to fight alongside her, Shadowheart landed the guiding bolt she had been wanting so desperately to let go of. The hag cried out again, and fell backwards into the mirror- shattering it to pieces. Instead of falling forward- she fell backwards into it’s many broken shards. Her haggard feet the last thing they saw as she tumbled into a black oblivion. There was a second of peace. Then, the sound of the shattered mirror rang out again, and all of its fragments were restored to their former places. The cracks became threads of glowing magic, and it was as if the mirror had never been broken at all.

A gasp was heard. Zenosyne was awake. The party all rushed over to the stone table where she lay.

Without hesitation, Astarion leapt into action. Just as she was opening her eyes he pushed the others aside, emerging from the crowded adventurers. He looked down at her terrified face, and tried to smile. He placed his hands on her shaking shoulders.

"It's alright. You're safe, darling" he said, gently. His voice soothing. He took her face in his cold hands and she reached up to hold them.

"I think..." she spoke, but fell into a gasping, coughing fit. The long, deep sleep had left her weak and afraid.

Astarion reached down, one arm behind her back, the other beneath her knees, and lifted her up from the table.

"Don't think now, darling. There will be plenty of time for that later. Rest now." He whispered, and carried her up the steps into the hag's cottage.