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everlusts · 3 months ago

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idk about you guys but i actually have a really special talent called turning ao3 into canon in my personal mind palace and id suggest doing that because you’ll feel great and unstoppable and sooner or later you’ll be going s2 happened? really? didn’t know but thanks

#try it some time trust it works #i’ll be devouring the new fics but i’ve been binging all the pre-s2 ones and wow haladriel writers have more talent than COUGH #one day ill link up all the fics for people so you can treat them as the real s2 #haladriel #saurondriel #halbrand x galadriel #sauron x galadriel #galadriel #sauron #trop #years of fandom have made me immune to canon like my disappointment lasted a total of one day and now idk they had a s2 did they idts hmmm

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fadelsburger · 6 days ago

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THE HEART KILLERS (2024-2025) เขาจ้างให้ผมจีบนักฆ่า dir. Jojo Tichakorn Phukhaotong

#the heart killers #the heart killers the series #joong archen #dunk natachai #tuserhidden #tusersilence #tobelle #userrlana #userlinnea #vishingwell #zeystuff #gif: thk #you know what I wanted to upload this despite maybe there is already the same set out there... which I rarely upload anymore if I know #but I have things to say about this scene... I feel like this is the first genuine conversation they had in all the episodes so far #as the cautious guy Fadel is he must've searched style beforehand (which we don't see but he must've) so which also means he knew about #his mother not being alive and yes obviously also him working at the garage but this is the first time fadel asked style things out of #curiosity... (even if he knew in my opinion) and style being so comfortable with fadel that he forgot that he's talking to a hitman #it's the guy he's interested in. he forgot for a split second whom he talking to and trusted him enough to tell all about these #things about him which is kinda personal at least for some yet here we are with one who's trusting the other enough to tell things #and fadel is surprised!! no one can convince me otherwise I might be delulu but like i said i believe he already knows all of this #yet he asked and didn't expect that style would be so open about all this to tell him this the 6th and 8th gif tells a lot #fadel is still trying to figure style out but I feel like the conversation here and at the garage where fadel saw himself #style in working mode and how he helps out a lot at the garage and the conversation how his dad became his most important person #added a lot to his trust barometer when it comes to style. he sees him in a different perspective. light whatever you wanna call it #but it definitely trust his view on style a bit. I already talked a lot under my own set so I'll stop

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tommykinard217 · 2 days ago

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Anyone wanna send me fluffy headcanons or smth good abt their day or what not?

#im at work and i am NOT doing great rn #this is the third time I've had to stave off basically a major panic attack in 5 hours #so i could really use some sweet and or positive things #trust me im trying the deep breaths and trying to ground myself and all of that #but unfortunately it doesnt do much after awhile #so I'd rather distract myself

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pleasedontcareaboutme · 3 months ago

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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry

( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)

(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)

#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him #I always knew he was a parental figure for me #but now I connected the dots #How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life #that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so #and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life #ofc ud become attached #i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him #he occupies most of my thoughts honestly #But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life #i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an #bloom and be free #and that's what ill try to do #but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness #its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired #somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea #how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi #g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if #lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways #sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay #yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le #go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk #how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate #my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t #me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol #so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest #y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t #ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti #ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd

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mantisgodsdomain · 5 months ago

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More notes for Roach conlanging. Roach has grammatical gender, in which only Male, Female, and Object are grammatical genders, whereas Worker uses feminine grammar, Queen and King use a slight variant on feminine grammar, and Drone, and Queen-Alate use masculine grammar. This is because King is derived from Queen, due to their similar positions in a colony, and Queen-Alate is derived from Drone, as both are forms of alate.

Queen is an alteration of feminine grammar that functionally just adds a handful of extra syllables to it, and King is an offsprout of Queen that uses the same grammar with different pronouns. Queen-Alate, despite the name, is derived from Drone, as they are both for referring to different types of alate ant.

Most Roach dialects are intelligible to speakers of Snakemouth Den Cordyceps Roach, but Snakemouth Den Cordyceps Roach is not entirely intelligable to speakers of Roach dialects due to a mix of the excessively specialized vocabulary caused by the specific needs of its speakers, the fact that its speakers do not necessarily have Roach mouthparts and thus may not pronounce syllables in a similar way, and due to the fact that Inanimate Object is a full grammatical gender that does not exist in any other dialect of roach and replaces a decent chunk of terminology for things that previously had Other Words For Them.

#we speak #conlang #bug fables #please excuse us if we're mangling the terminology here btw. we cannot for the life of us remember the proper terms for half of this #and every time we try to google things it winds up turning up nothing #probably because we're googling shit like “the term for the thing where self reference is different if youre a guy or a girl”#and like. “part of speech that you use to refer to other people that isnt pronouns or a name that has title associations”#if we reread some textbooks we will probably remember but unfortunately these are not our textbook reference posts #they are our “what if we told you about the cool ways that we did grammar in here” post #god we love grammatical grammar (<guy who doesn't have a strong enough sense of gender to remember der and die properly)#(because we are the specific type of speaker where we're half operating based on what Feels Right with the word and we are)#(so fucking bad at remembering how gendering words is meant to go)#(the secret reason we hate phonetics is because we have to contend with both figuring out how mouthparts would work and like)#(Working Out A Reasonable Collection Of Sounds To Have In Our Language. which means we have to actually like. name things)#(cruel and unusual that we have to make actual words rather than loosely tossing building blocks on the floor. honestly.)#anyways snakemouth den roach is one of those dialects where it's on the verge of becoming a language on its own #where it's very debatable on if it's Actually A New Language or just a very specific dialect of an old one because. well. boxes #picture it as like. trying to speak to someone who you Think is speaking french but they have an extremely thick regional accent #and they keep using like ten-syllable words that you probably don't know but that seem to refer to things that could be referred to #way more concisely?#and also rather than just le and la they have added an entire new lu to the mix and you are unclear if its the accent or a new word entirel #(note: we are not a specialist on french as we primarily know it in the “we've been around it long enough to vaguely know what's being said #way and are not currently caught up enough on whatever they have going on to know about any major grammar stuff going on over there)#(but we are terrible enough with remembering the grammar of the german that we do speak that we do not trust ourself to not be Worse there)

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moe-broey · 5 months ago

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Miwabiwis.......

I actually do like her official outfit! I just... had a deep need.... put that girl in a nightgown and slippers RIGHT NOW‼️‼️‼️‼️ Also it is admittedly so much easier to draw 🧍

I did try to keep in line with most of her official look though! Or add more emphasis to little details, like the red berries... other details I added, like the bloomers, keep the roundness of her og dress! BUT ALSO.... they are just so cutes.... I imagine they're made of rose petals...... I was also thinking angelic motifs. With the dress shape, and the smaller wings shaped as such!

#fire emblem #feh #so much of this was just. trusting her color palette actually. like i feel there are just A Lot. of colors here.#some of which idk if the even should work together!!! in combination like this!!! red/pink! easy! pink/purple! easy!#pink/green! ONE OF MY FAVES. pink/blue? CLASSIC. pink w a rainbow gradient? THE CROWD GOES WILD I LOVE THAT SHIT #pastel pink/hot pink! YIPPEE!!!!! all together?? um. all? together? all of them? you said. all of them?????? hhngh. OKAYYY....#ADD A LITTLE PINK/YELLOW IN THERE. JUST FOR FUNSIES. FOR THE BIT. ALRIGHT!!!! WHY THE FUCK NOT!!!!!!!#trying to balance this w my own touches too. like the butterfly clips. they add SO much whimsy.#you can tear those from my cold dead hands. do they match the berries at the bottom of her hair....? um. well #idk i just think she's so cute she makes it work.#another challenging thing from a logistical level though was trying to get the shapes right...#like. turning down the business of the design. trying to draw the eyes to a focal point (which i think is the gown?)#then your eyes can parse out ooohh big fluffy hair and cute round bloomers peaking through. and wings!#LIKE... i think the sleek simple gown w just a bit of ruffliness at the bottom does help a lot #she feels. balanced. i hope LMFAOOO #either way this is how i'm going to draw her now and you can't stop me. if i'm going to be drawing a chara one million times #I NEED. TO MAKE IT EASY ON MYSELF. and fun! i am SO in love w her little nightgown it's INSANE... look at hwr.... 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#mirabilis #my art

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mars-ipan · 6 months ago

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some postgame doodles for pride month

#martzipan #komahina #hajime hinata #nagito komaeda #domestic kmhn likers pspspsps cmere #i never draw just fluff/domestic things bc i get too in my feelings lmao. this one was no exception #i had to take a break midway through bc i got sappy. IT'S OK THO we got it done :3 #neways these tie into some headcanons of mine so i'm gonna share 'em here #mainly i hc them having little ways where they just look out for each other #komaeda is usually the only one who can convince hinata to take a goddamn break without having to forcefully drag him away from his work #bc hinata does NOT take enough breaks. and he does not listen to reason #until there is a komaeda who is tired and can't go to sleep without his human teddy bear :((( can't let him go to bed aloneeee #n i think hinata just. casually feeds komaeda ALL the time #bc he won't eat enough on his own. and if you offer him food he'll be inclined to see it as a nicety and try to reject it #but if you just. Put Food In Front Of His Mouth. he'll eat it #it's kind of a reflex like komaeda doesn't realize he's being fed most of the time #they take care of each other bc they won't take care of themselves otherwise lmao. it's a little dysfunctional but they're trying #i think once they've recovered enough to be able to just enjoy each other's company they get REALLY really giggly #they have a lot of teenage/young adult love stuff to catch up on and since they didn't really have a puppy love phase. they laugh a lot #they'll try to do something tender or sweet but then one of them will start to laugh. and then it's not long before the other breaks #komaeda usually breaks first. bc he's always in awe of just how happy he is. bc he never thought he COULD be this happy #not without hell looming just over the horizon anyways #when hinata breaks first it's bc he's thinking of how much they've both been through and put each other through #and he's just sort of like 'how the fuck did we end up here'#(btw komaeda snorts when he's trying not to laugh. this is just fact trust me)#OH AND I HAVE MANY HEADCANONS ABT THEIR SLEEP STUFFS #as stated hinata runs hot and komaeda runs cold. but ALSO #hinata's a sprawler. komaeda gets Clingy. it works out for them tho #if komaeda doesn't have hinata to hold like a body pillow he'll curl into the tightest little ball. it gives him back pain lmao #oh and yes. they absolutely wake up with their legs incredibly tangled together

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milkymooshi · 9 months ago

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I have plans that I cannot share with you rn bc the haters would sabotage me.

I have plans that I cannot share bc the haters would sabotage me, but TRUST!! I got plans in the works

#IT CAME TO ME LIKE A PROPHECY #I’ve been trying to draw more so I can work on anatomy and more dynamic poses (bc I can’t keep drawing only headshots my whole life)#BUT TRUST!! THE PLANS ARE IN THE WORKS AND WILL BE POSTED SOME TIME THIS YEAR #!!!!! <3 #nygmobblepot #gotham riddler #gotham penguin #gotham #oswald cobblepot #edward nygma #moo.txt

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o-sunny-day · 28 days ago

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THEY HIT THE PENTAGON, THEY HIT THE FUKN PENTAGONNNN

chat we have another Abba song that fits so well with Forgettable AU, CHAT!!! I REPEAT!!! ABBA!!!!!

we love Abba, I really gotta marathon through their stuff sometime, I dont usually care for an artist/bands entire work cause its usually only 2-3 songs or an album that I like, BUT ABBA JUST KEEPS HITTIN THE RIGHT BUTTONS IDK WHAT IT IS

But… this IS another example of absolute perfect depictions of friendship/sibling relationships being ruined by SUDDEN ROMANCE IN SONGS???? Ignore that….just look at the lyrics I stole and imagine the amvs…..

also oh no, Wingdings stole my account briefly-

I mean im not complaining but also what the hell man :(

#IN ABBA WE TRUST #the winner takes it all…..#the winner is the player…..#wingdings thought it was gonna be him but nah….. he died.#kinda #the beginning i imagine is a conversation between sans and dings #like i dont care about our history (growing up together)#im GOD sans you dont understand #‘i was a fool playing by the rules’ and ‘gods may throw the dice’ is like #dings trying to escape the video game but finding out hes still playing by their rules #so then VOID TIME!!!#thats my new theory #thanks Abba :3 #in the void he can do awesome things like hack Tobys twitter account #i think some of the lyrics in this also works pretty well for Alphys and Dings #perchance

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t8oo · 7 months ago

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there is some symbolism iv never considered in that one episod of pt5 where zenigata rescues fujiko before she kills lupin

#there are many timelines and variations in lupin as a serie so that every ship could work #in my own prefered timeline lupin finally gets the hint that fujiko plays him like a fiddle #to me she does like him but he is an instrument to her #she is cold hearted and calculating and always thinking about relationships in terms of profit #i got some ideas abt her background that justify this. essentially she kills the detective that is after her and with that kills #the soft part of her that she couldnt control before #eventually and despite his affection lupin gives up the objectifications and the desires he projects onto fujiko #whom uses his delusions like a master tbh #thus allowing himself to consider zenigata. he plays with zenigata the way fujiko plays with him #hes just not as calculating. he feels pity and remorse where fujiko doesnt #he finds the thrills and the doubts and the lack of trust and the risk of betrayal in zenigata. the things that he loves the most #he isnt about stability. he thrives in the unknown. he loves that zenigata could backstab him and does so sometimes #and in that lack of stabilty some form of stability builds up. there is familiarity #and most importantly there are rare times when they can put the game aside and just chill #just enough to gather the energy to go back to trying to kill each other #plus zenigata pampers him during those breaks and he loves that #he acts with carelessness but he does care. in that regard he looses to fujiko #at least thats how she sees it. he doesnt see caring as a flaw #and zenigata is so sweet. he really is. and lupin loves to stirr up the crazy in him #fucking loonies the both of them #so in essence zenigata doesnt really 'save' him from fujiko but he becomes lupins new favourite toy to throw around #fujiko is only upset that because of that ugly looser of a detective her grip on lupin is loosening #she does find ways to use that newly developed affection luzeni has to her advantage thou #lupin is still her instrument she just drags zenigata along now #fujiko is such a good and interesting character and deserves so much better honestly #despite my love for TWCFM i wish there was another serie centralized around her where her ruthlessness is examined #and her cunning is studied. and the proper law enforcement she should face the same way lupin does #shes like a million times smarter and more ressourceful than him. steals much more. embezzles. manipulate #lupin is just a small time pickpocket next to her. she isnt about stealing a painting shes about emptying the pockets of the richest men in #the world. her goals are much more ambitious

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craftingcreatures · 10 months ago

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Why does everybody think capybaras are so chill. Every capybara I've ever interacted with has been one withheld orange slice away from committing a homicide

#capybara #I used to work at a petting zoo #We had three capybaras and had to keep them separate because the females would try to kill each other #I've watched them charge wallabies just for getting in their space #One time a lady brought in a little dog (which for some reason they were allowed to do if they keep them in their arms the whole time)#(she didn't)#The capy decided that dog needed to die and did its absolute best to make it that way #Fortunately the staff saw it and managed to intervene before anything serious happened #But the capy was not happy #I don't trust capybaras. They look chill but they're full of rage

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sysig · 1 year ago

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Let me chew you out a little, since we have a couple minutes (Patreon)

[Panel 1] Prismo: *mumble* *mumble*

[Panel 2] Prismo: *mumble*

[Panel 3] Simon: Hmph. “Just because it’s in your head-”

[Panel 4] Simon: “-Doesn’t mean it’s yours,” huh?

[Panel 5] Simon: Give me all the responsibility with none of the privileges?

[Panel 6] Simon: And then you get mad at me for trying to pick up your slack? Prismo: Hey...

[Panel 7] Simon: Clearly you already expect that much from me!

[Panel 8] Prismo: Hey, hey! I did the best with what I had! I didn’t expect any of this!

[Panel 9] Simon: And yet you didn’t even consider telling me, so we could’ve avoided this?

[Panel 10] Prismo: It’s not like I could’ve just- taken it out! I was locked out!

[Panel 11] Simon: You could’ve done something!

[Panel 12] Simon: Instead you let my life spiral around this thing, kept me tethered to Ice King’s Madness-

[Panel 13] Prismo: Fionna and Cake are real thou- Simon: NOW you tell me! After I find out for myself!

#Doodles #Adventure Time #Fionna and Cake #Simon Petrikov #Prismo #They have like two minutes where they're alone together that aren't directly shown onscreen: Allow me to insert some ideas lol #As long as Simon isn't so faded that he can't work the nerve up I Absolutely think he'd get mad at Prismo for all this #Not like he didn't just come back from a terrible experience trying to work around his terrible dregs! He's very miserable!#Honestly I think the anger would be good for him lol #He's had to live like this for years! Under Ice King's shadow for something that wasn't his doing!#And he knows Prismo - he met him - they talked - but not about this #And I mean I honestly don't blame Prismo - with everything going on and his own depression spiral he had a few things on his mind #It's in a bad way for everyone #That said he is a Wish Master he really could've told Simon at any point even if he couldn't take his little pet project out of him lol #Then again again what Was he supposed to do lol #As much as I would trust Simon to keep a secret I don't think either of them could've expected Simon trying to summon Golb to do this #Obviously it /did/ happen that way but could either of them have guessed?? I don't think so #''Don't go summoning your ex-'' ''She's not my ex >:('' '''Cause there's an illicit universe in your head and you might summon that instead'#Like what no I don't think Prismo could've just - guessed that! Lol #He did leave Simon out to dry vis a vis Ice King and Fionna and Cake tho which was Not cool and he Could've done something about that #Although I can also see Simon snapping and telling someone that it wasn't his own stories - there's no winning!#But that's what makes the argument fun haha #Man they're both fun to draw ♪ Simon in that dress and Prismo's tiiiiired tired eyes haha ♫#It was shortlived but they have a fun dynamic :D Simon speaks so deadpan and sarcastic with Prismo haha <3 It's quite cute honestly

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peppermintack · 6 months ago

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show tempe gang crossover with the morris islanders would actually have been the best episode of bones ever. btw

#please ignore the rest of the tags i will just be making things up #okay they start out in carolina but at least half the episode takes place in dc. do not ask me how travel logistics would work #tory spends the entire episode off with tempe doing bone stuff. booth feels upstaged by a 16-year-old girl #so he goes and hangs out with ben who does NOT trust him right off the bat #ben ends up having to run him over to liri at some point because there's crime afoot and tom is busy. they spend most of the ride in silenc #ofc they end up bonding Eventually because they are both obsessed with crazy emotionally stunted redheads named t brennan #tory is more effective than any of the squinterns and manages to piss hodgins off so bad just by existing #coop hangs out in the lab as saroyan tries to kick him out thirty times. he just keeps showing up and she can't prove who's letting him in #(it's tempe.) angela loves tory but tory does not love angela back. saroyan tolerates her. sweets likes her but knows she's hiding somethin #comes to the conclusion that she can read her friends minds and slowly drives himself crazy because obviously that can't be true #tory brings hi along whenever she needs someone with people skills and he is MORE than happy to participate in a hodgins experiment #hi gets to be king of the lab for about ten minutes. shelton hits it off with angela immediately and they solve half the case together #booth fucking HATES hi because he's evasive and really good at the manipulation thing. booth can't win verbal sparring and he gets Big Mad #at one point the four of them are in an interrogation room together (MISTAKE) because tory had them meddling a little too close to the sun #and booth is trying so hard to question them which didn't work even when they COULDN'T read each other's minds #tory figures out who did it and hi steals her thunder a la shrek wasnt vandalized he gave birth #temperance tells tory 'i know you've got a secret sweets told me and even though i don't trust psychology i find he's insightful' etc etc #tory's like well i might be but i can't tell you it's not just my secret and you wouldn't believe me anyway #because let's be real tempe WOULDNT believe her #meanwhile saroyan convinced by sweets paranoia managed to get a sample of tory's blood and test it and is like HEY WHAT THE FUCK #gets hodgins and they just stare at the results together and delve into conspiracy theories. he's like i KNEW there were werewolves #they debate telling tempe but know it wouldnt end well for the kids and decide to get rid of the evidence. but hodgins is SO smug #also angela spends the whole episode trying to convince everyone hi and shelton are dating and no one believes her #they finally see them kiss or something and they're all somehow floored and angela's just like yeah? duh?#if anyone read this i'm sorry and why

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crescentfool · 1 year ago

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with the year coming to a close, i hope that anyone who's reflecting about how the year went remembers to be kind and fair to themselves with how you evaluate the year as a whole.

i think there are definitely times when life throws things that are... Not So Great at you. whether if it's some external circumstance that surprised you, or maybe your mentality wasn't at it's best. i wish for anyone who's encountered those kinds of challenges to be able to triumph over them and be able to say that they got through it.

heck, it might still be a work in progress even though you've kept chipping away at it, and that's ok! the results will show themselves eventually as you work through it! and i hope that we can all remember to be patient with ourselves as we go through these processes (learning, healing, etc.), because damn, it can be frustrating when you feel like you're "not there yet."

knowing that life can be rough at times, i think it's unfair to yourself (and others) to discount and downplay any progress you've made this year- whether if it's something that you did for the first time, or maybe you came to a new understanding and insight that you didn't have in the previous year.

it's not to say that you should undermine the validity of your experience with hardship, but to take the time to remind yourself what makes life worth living. to recall what moments were the most satisfying to you- and use it to strengthen your resolve for the next year and beyond. no amount of hardship will ever take away from the fact that you deserve to have hope that things will get better.

i hope that looking back on the year, you don't leave out the things you cherish. that you can remember the good that came this year. whether if the small victories are things like meeting someone new, trying something out for the first time, or making some strides in a long-term project/obligation...!

i wish everyone a happy new year! may it be prosperous, and that your life can move in a direction that's close to what you want out of life. you're all going to do great! remember to congratulate yourself for what you did well! despite everything, you're still here, and that's wonderful. never forget that!

#lizzy speaks #hello everyone. i know that there are *checks calendar* still 20 days left of december and 2023 #but i've had a lot of strong emotions and feelings i've had to sort through as i've been thinking about how 2023 went for me #so a lot of what i've written here comes from the perspective of someone in their early 20s #it's like... a crash and burn from when you were a teenager thinking that you know everything #and realizing how big the world is and how many responsibilities there are #all while a feeling of overwhelm looms over as you try to sift your way through the world and adjust your understanding of it #for me i've definitely had an underlying thought that 'you should have your shit together by now why aren't you there yet'#and it's! not motivating! at all! to think that way. and it's made me more than ever want to be a friend to myself. to extend a patient-#kind voice to myself that reminds me that others are also trying to navigate these feelings and to accept that i'm not going to have an-#instantaneous understanding of how one goes about adulthood. and neither will they. even if they look 'put together.'#like... these people have also undergone similar stresses and along the way figured out how to navigate through that space #and personally i've found peace in knowing that there are people who are older than me. trusting that they've dealt with these things too i #some shape or form and that them living... being here.. is proof that we shall be fine in the end and that we will move past what plagues-#our mind. there's definitely been some... anger i've had this year that. school didnt teach me these things or skills!! i was so mad lol #but hey if we are little guys who are living on planet earth for the first time we shouldn't condemn ourselves to an unrealistic standard-#of going through life and being able to instantly do everything 'correctly' and know how everything works #i'm still working on improving that patience... and also trying to put in the work to understand these things.#in the midst of a very tough week for me i was tempted to say that 'nothing happened this year it was not productive'#but then i was like. that's. objectively not true if you just look at other things. also theres worth in life outside of 'productivity'#...i think i passed 20 tags at this point. but like. my favorite thing about 2023 was meeting so many cool awesome people!#who would've known that funny lil squid game could bring so many connections and friendships i cherish!#thank you so much! for being a part of my life and changing me for the better! for giving me many fond memories!#and i'm very grateful to anyone who supported me and my art this year... for sticking around even though i wished i could do more #it means the world to me knowing that there's proof that i exist and have touched someone's life in a positive way! thank you! truly!#ANYWAY. happy early new year. i hope everyone can nourish a friend in their head that extends acceptance and patience to themselves #as we try and make sense of the world together. there will be things that we don't understand yet! but one day we will! and it'll be like #wow! look how far i came! i'm okay! i'm alive! yipee! thank you for reading this post i made to get my feelings out! have a nice day!

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mad-hunts · 7 months ago

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#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#YOUR NEED GREW TEETH: character study.#character introspection.#ahh... something about this is so accurate NGL like sadly barton will always have this-#immense anger in him i feel like no matter what he does to try to contain it / surpress it and this is-#because it has literally become a part of who he is as a person. ans by that i mean he ALWAYS has a sense-#of rage stirring within him that is just waiting to be unleashed and that is both kind of disheartening as well as scary #including for him. but barton is also used to it so it's like... he's grown a bit desensitized to it at the same time #even though that's arguably pretty sad to think about. barton is just not good at processing his emotions in healthy-#ways so his sadness is commonly turned into anger and the rare occasions where he does feel guilt / shame?#they also come off as anger because it is a much easier emotion for barton to process than sadness #so yeahhh. man's has definitely got some issues that he needs to work out regarding how you don't need to be-#afraid of getting sad especially if you have a good support system to help you through it... but he just JSJSJ refuses to-#show those kinds of feelings around people for a prolonged amount of time bc he doesn't trust that people won't use it-#to try to 'take advantage of him' so to speak since barton himself has cheered people up for that sole purpose before. thus it's all like-#one big vicious cycle y'know bc he fears the very thing that he practices.

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esleep · 4 months ago

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I'm speaking as someone who had a really bad burnout a handful of years ago. You need to give your brain a break. Usually for adhd folks more asleep helps a ton with the brain fog. Adding stimulants will just have your body draw from an already empty well. If you're having trouble with rest or other forms of self-care doctors can help and so can some of the online resources out there. Supplements are wonderful too. Take care of yourself and good luck. You can do it.

thanks so much you sweet anon <3 creating my prior post actually did prompt me to call my doc about upping the wellbutrin because i'm on a low dose rn and i think i need some more mental stability at the moment. but i think you are right about the exhaustion, which increasing the adderall would probably make worse. im gonna see if the doc also has any input on how to help me sleep better because i think that's also a big factor. thank you angel 💕💕💕💕

#for some additional context: about a month ago my grandpa very suddenly lost the ability to walk #he was hospitalized and not doing well. i had to drop everything and drive a few states over because we thought he may not make it.#while i was there (staying with my parents who i don't get along great with) he was diagnosed with cancer and given between 6 months - 3 yr #to live depending on whether or not he wanted to do chemo. it was also determined he will probably never walk again.#i had to come home after a week and a half because i have to work for a living. after i got home they found nodular cirrhosis in his liver #which is causing confusion and hallucinations.#there's a lot of family baggage going on at the same time that i am trying to manage that is too personal and complex to try to explain #but trust there are a lot of mixed emotions going on for everyone and that is making everything even harder.#anyway. that's not even everything but that was kinda the kickoff event of the last few miserable weeks and ever since then stuff just kind #keeps happening and i just want to lay down.#and also scream.#sorry for mopeyposting on the silly website i promise this isn't all my blog is now but sometimes you just have to talk to the rubber ducky #you know?

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