#trust issues and paranoia. maybe. whos to say

[saprophetic]

i hate that therapy works because ill be saying something that up thats been Normal for me to think and then ill realize that actually "if you let someone think you have any weaknesses theyll use that to hurt you" is an insane thing to say in a conversation about dating apps

[yanderes-galore]

Hello, could you make a platonic concept for Sonic and Tails (game version) sharing the reader? Since they both see each other as brothers, they could try to make the reader their new sibling.

Aww... Sonic and Tails making you part of a trio 💜 Here you go! Sorry for the long wait as always, I'm really trying :)

Yandere! Platonic! Sonic + Tails Sharing Darling

Pairing: Platonic - Sharing

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Manipulation, Jealousy, Paranoia, Tracking, Stalking, Violence, Brief blood mention, Clingy behavior, Implications of murder, Dubious companionship.

Sonic and Tails have been friends for, what, years?

The two are probably the closest to one another due to all the adventures they've had.

They'd definitely share an obsession between one another as friends.

I can't really see the two fighting over someone... they care for each other too much.

The two would be protective of a shared friend between them.

Like... extremely protective.

The two have been through nearly everything together since they were friends.

Most of the time it's due to them dealing with Eggman.

I imagine the two ended up meeting you on one of their adventures, perhaps even saving you from Eggman.

Sonic is his usual cool and laid-back self, always playful with you and Tails.

Tails is more shy but always wants to help you out, often offering you a gadget to help your daily life.

The two love to give their friend gifts as then you'll think of them.

The two are no doubt incredibly affectionate with you as their friend.

Now, if they view you as a friend or sibling... they could go either way as it doesn't change much.

Tails seems like he'd love hugs, honestly Sonic would too but not admit it often.

There's times when you greet them and the two bombard you in affection.

They are both definitely physical when it comes to affection.

Regardless on how they view you, as platonic yanderes they take such a role seriously.

The two value your safety... especially with all they've been through.

Tails definitely hides at least one tracker on you to know where you are like in his usual concepts.

He'd often alert Sonic where you are, originally he only uses it to keep you out of trouble.

Over time they both just find comfort in knowing where to find you....

I imagine Tails is more tame while Sonic can come off as intense at times.

Sonic can come off as intimidating if his friends are hurt.

In this case that would include both you and Tails.

Because of the universe and personalities of both characters, I don't expect any murder.

Violence on the other hand... that can happen.

Tails seems like the type who would give subtle threats to those who bother you.

While Sonic is similar, I can see Sonic being more up front about threats.

While the two care about you a lot, I want to believe they won't socially isolate you too much.

They'd be more likely to just insert themselves into interactions you have instead.

For example, you'll be talking with someone only to have either Sonic or Tails join the conversation.

Tails is always so sweet about it while Sonic uses his popularity to distract the attention off of you.

I'd say they both can get jealous.

Tails is more quiet about it but Sonic seems to be more vocal about it.

They're probably one of the best duos to have since they are mostly not that intense.

They genuinely just want to care for their friend and most likely won't kidnap you.

Instead there's the whole tracking situation... but with that you at least have your freedoms, right?

They aren't too fond of isolating you too much.

Even Sonic loves his freedom.

Instead they choose to protect you from danger as friends should.

Although... they may make you second guess your choice in friends.

Maybe the two end up giving you trust issues, jealous if you're spending time with others more than them.

They can be lenient... to a point.

The two see themselves as your heroes, always knowing what's best for their dearest friends.

Heroes shouldn't get blood on their hands...

Key word is shouldn't

However... perhaps there's some exceptions.

If the two ever did hurt someone for you, they'd work together to hide it.

The most I can see them doing is beating someone up or threatening someone to be quiet.

The two killing is rare and almost unheard of...which may just give them the perfect cover if I'm being honest.

You have no clue what the extent of their friendship with you really is.

Far as you know, they're harmless heroes who are just protective of you.

In reality they may be threatening and beating up those who may make your life less than perfect.

Perhaps the friendly exterior Sonic and Tails have around you and others isn't fully truthful?

Maybe they really do threaten, lie, beat up... or maybe even kill...

But surely there's nothing to worry about...! They'd never do such a thing... that's what you tell yourself, that is.

In reality, who knows what they do to maintain their friendship with you...

Perhaps the rumors are true... and there really is blood on their hands.

"Hey, has anyone been bothering you lately? You seem a bit worried...."

"You shouldn't have to worry, friend... we'll take care of everything, right?"

[fandomsnrambles]

The spinjitzu family has recently become my roman empire for some reason, you’re all going to see so much of them 😭

Anyway, i’ve been thinking about his relationships with his sons recently. And I know he doesn’t have a good relationship with any of them.

I know people argue ‘Wu was his favourite’ but i think if we actually look at how he acts, you realise he didn’t really have a favourite. I also feel personally inclined to respectfully mention that just because Garmadon said it, doesn’t make it true. Characters have biases that mess with their worldviews after all. It’s like saying Wu’s to blame for the devourer’s bite because he said he was. Even though he was like seven, maybe nine and had no idea that snake even existed.

Thats why you should take everything they say with a grain of salt and then consider their actions.

Wu’s relationship with his father is complicated. In the spinjitzu books he mentions how he wants his father’s approval, but doesn’t know how to start with getting it. We also get hints of the FSM’s (flawed) parenting methods in the show. I’ve noticed he’s emotionally distant even if he’s physically there. I mean, Wu says his father talked to them (Garmadon and Wu) less after the Aspheera incident. Makes me think that the FSM was definitely not there emotionally.

Due to this, Wu’s emotional needs as a child weren’t really met. His fathers distance hurt him and the FSM (maybe accidentally) neglected him. I say accidentally because i’m pretty sure the FSM is a traumatised child soldier who doesn’t know how to properly cope with everything so they just shut down/dissociate.

Wu was also raised with high expectations (alongside Garmadon.) This probably put him under a lot of stress to keep up. I’m thinking gifted child who got burnt out and more depressed as he aged.

I also think the FSM has trust and paranoia issues. You can look at Nineko and the way they went about dying for this. This guy really hands their son a script of where he died without telling him he gave it to him and mentions the bare minimum details. (I wonder if mentioning too much details got the FSM hurt. Maybe thats why he’s so distant.) Of course, trauma doesn’t really excuse being a flawed parent.

I also feel the need to mention that Wu unintentionally copies his father’s trauma responses. Heck, we could even talk about how Garmadon does the same, and later Lloyd. They all bottle their emotions and issues and hope nothing bad ever happens with that ever. Too bad for them though, we know how this ends

(Oof this is ✨generational trauma✨ at work)

Moving on to Garmadon, we know that after he got bitten by the devourer, the FSM helped him through his episodes and tries his best to find a cure. From this i can honestly say that the FSM did love and care for his sons. But this doesn’t mean they knew how to properly show that they did (especially because he doesn’t have a proper basis for what parent-child relationships should even look like.)

We see this when we get to know of Garmadon’s insecurities as a child. He doesn’t think there was anything wrong with him and seems to hate how the FSM tries to find a cure for him. Maybe because he doesn’t like the implication that he needs ‘fixing’ more than anything else. Garmadon’s also different than Wu in the sense that he grows more resentful of his father as he grows older whilst Wu clings to his father’s attention to get approval/praise.

I also want to mention how this resentment built up also affects how his perception of Wu’s relationship with their dad. He thinks Wu is favoured probably because Wu doesn’t have the venom and is the good one (because the venom apparently makes Garmadon the ‘bad’ one) and he sees his younger brother as the golden child. This probably built to jealousy and then guilt for the jealousy because Garmadon does love his brother a lot.

The high expectations also come’s into play here. It probably puts a lot of weight on Garmadon’s shoulders. Which doesn’t make his growing feelings of resentment better nor does it make his insecurities about his venom any better.

What makes this whole situation worse is that NO ONE in this family knows how to communicate. Wu doesn’t tell his dad or his brother how he feels, Garmadon doesn’t as well and FSM wouldn’t be caught breathing a word of his feelings to be honest.

This whole family would rather die than communicate ffs.

In conclusion:

[cecilysass]

Why I Think The X-Files Isn’t Really As Much About Watergate and Governmental Conspiracy As Everyone Claims, Maybe Including CC

This one’s really nerdy, get ready.

Media covering the X-Files has always emphasized how much the show capitalizes on a post-Watergate worldview, a paranoia about government and belief in high-level conspiracy. I think CC signed on to this interpretation entirely. So much so that he sure kept on feeding those conspiracy plot lines in the mytharc—even when every other plot line was going hungry. 

So much so that in the revival, he really created a problem for himself, which the media picked up on. Government conspiracy nuts in 2016 no longer were hot sensitive 90s guy outcasts like Mulder or quirky cuddly little nerds like the Gunmen. Government conspiracy nuts in 2016 were media savvy right wing commentators manipulating the masses, getting presidents elected through willful misinformation.  The revival series tried to address this head on with Tad O’Malley, a character who represented this new development. But it was definitely a sticky issue: the sociopolitical context of the original show was gone. Was the show relevant any more?

I would argue yes, or at least it could have been. I would argue that the interpretation of the XF as a show primarily about conspiracy at high levels of power and governmental manipulation is a flawed one to begin with. I think this take makes the show way too thematically narrow, limits it, and obscures the show’s more important appeals.

In the 1990s, media coverage of the show almost always mentioned Watergate the historical event. Sometimes coverage discussed how Watergate was directly referenced on the show (Deep Throat, meetings in parking deck, CSM and Diana both living in the actual Watergate), but also Watergate’s specific effect on creator Chris Carter, who specifically cited it as a formative event. Often it was claimed that the show’s popularity with audiences was rooted in post-Watergate suspicion of government.

I think this could have been true generally speaking, although I always thought it somewhat overestimated the impact of Watergate on the XF’s target audience. Consider that in 1997 many in the key 18-49 demographic would not even remember Watergate especially well, or at all. If you were 30 in 1997, you were 6 when the story broke in 1973. I’m sure that could have left a mark on you, but I also think it might have been something that simply left a much bigger impression on Boomers the age of Chris Carter himself.

Me? I was in college in 1997, and I was nonexistent / unborn during Watergate. So I didn’t remember it, and it held no personal significance in my worldview regarding the United States. I don’t think it ever would have occurred to me to trust that the government was telling me the truth all the time, and I wouldn’t ever be shocked to learn I was being intentionally misled. As a late Gen Xer growing up in the Reagan administration with post-Watergate ideas floating in the air, I just assumed the worst from the get-go.

So I admit: sometimes the earnest speeches from Mulder and Scully about the Truth and being lied to from men in power and a government we purport to trust seemed a little repetitive and obvious to me. It’s taken me a while to realize that these speeches are voicing something very specific and historically real, the furious indignation of Boomers that we can’t trust our institutions. I think I felt like, yeah, okay, okay, I get it. I never had the same kind of trust in institutions to lose in this respect, but this was a major betrayal for people my parents’ age.

All of this to say, I don’t think that the conspiracy worldview and the appeal of the paranoia about government was a big part of the draw for me. I’m not saying it wasn’t for many or even most others. But my instinct about storytelling is that that is a little too abstract or bloodless of an appeal to really hook most viewers anyway. Like, you might be interested in conspiracy to get you to watch initially, sure, but that’s probably not going to keep you watching for years. And it’s really not going to be enough to motivate you to tune in to a revival series in the 2010s.

So what was the big hook for viewers? You’re probably expecting me to say MSR, and if so, I’m going to surprise you a little. I do think that was part of it for some percentage of viewers, but I think it is more complex than that.

I think the show tapped into a late 20th century urge for individuals to become part of something greater than ourselves. Something we might think of as numinous or transcendent. Maybe something meaningful and good (like a quest for truth) — or maybe something that will look down and judge us, for good or ill. Something that means that we are not lonely in the universe. This puts X-Files squarely in an overall 1990s angels and aliens otherworldly trend. 

(Personally, and this could be an only me thing, but I can never quite separate out Tony Kushner’s Angels in America and The X-Files in my mind; Angels debuted on Broadway the same year X-Files first aired, and I was exposed to both at about the same time. They’re both about apocalypse and personal crisis and the end of the millennium and the transformative power of authentic relationships with others. I could do a whole thing on this.)

The desire for transcendence is the part of the show that is summed up by Mulder and Scully watching lights together in the sky, by Mulder’s wonder at seeing ships or aliens, by the entire notion of “I Want To Believe,” by the idea expressed in the last episode of the original series that both Mulder and Scully share—that the dead aren’t lost to us, that “they speak to us as part of something greater than us - greater than any alien force.” Mulder says to Scully that if “you and I are powerless now, I want to believe that if we listen to what’s speaking, it can give us the power to save ourselves.” There’s definitely a part of the show that is about little lonely human beings finding how they fit in a big, unfeeling universe.

The show's interest in conspiracy figures into this. Because after all, what are conspiracy theories but reassurance that there is some meaning behind everything after all? That there is some powerful system running the show, even if that system might be kind of evil. A grand organized secret an individual can actually uncover, rather than a bunch of random haphazard incompetence and chaos. I think this is part of the show's interest in transcendence, but only one part.

And there’s also part of the show that’s about a hero who is wracked with loneliness and alienation — and then two heroes who are wracked with loneliness and alienation—finding a kind of salvation in Truth, in Justice, in Trust, in Partnership, and, ambiguously, Love. (Sometimes Mulder sounds more like a 19th century Romantic hero than anything else.) This makes it a little allegory about late 20th century individualism and alienation and desire for meaning and authenticity and connection with others. 

I think what appeals to people emotionally in the show is that part of us that wonders: is there a universe that pays attention to me? Is there anyone who listens to me and who really, really knows me? Does anyone besides me care what is true and what is a lie? Will I find those who are lost to me and repair the parts of me that are broken? Is there anyone who would give up their life for mine?

I think that the desire to connect with others is a really basic human drive, and it’s most obviously foregrounded in the show the Mulder-Scully partnership. Even romance aside, we see from the first episode that these are two people with distinct worldviews who want to communicate, who see something in one another, who are hungry to be understood by one another. They ultimately see the other person as someone who reflects and affirms who they are. The partnership is definitely the emotional hook of the show, whether you see that as a romantic ship or not, and it thematically echoes the show’s overall themes of wanting there to be more in the universe. 

When the show was at its most emotionally devastating, it was one or both of its protagonists losing a relationship or connection that was important to them, or it was their frustration that their efforts were not meaningful on a larger scale: grief over a loss, a coverup that meant Justice wasn’t served or Truth was concealed.

When the show’s moments were most emotionally triumphant, they were always moments of overt connection, usually between Mulder and Scully, both more dramatic (“you’re my touchstone”) and subtle (reaching out to take a partner’s hand in Pusher or Field Trip). When there were moments of triumph concerning the government conspiracy, it felt more allegorical, like information (Truth) getting free, not progress made in specific governmental reform or anything. 

(And honestly, the moments of triumph against the conspiracy were pretty few and far between. We left the original run of show with the protagonists on the run, pretty sure there was going to be an alien invasion in coming years that had been facilitated by complicit human conspirators, so this conspiracy thread of the plot apparently didn’t even seem like the most important and emotionally satisfying story to resolve.)     

CC wrote a NY Times piece addressing the changing landscape on conspiracies in 2021, discussing why he was skeptical of a new UFO report. He was perceived as having the authority to write this because he created a show that quintessentially addressed government conspiracies about visitors from space.

But for me, the question of whether the government was hiding evidence of extraterrestrial life was really not the main takeaway from TXF. At least no more than the question of whether there needed to be an investigation into the undue influence of witchcraft in Scotland was my main takeaway of Macbeth.

I do acknowledge that I may have been in the minority. Maybe this is not how most people felt. But I also wonder if sometimes the urge to make the show primarily about political paranoia became a distraction from what it did best—these larger, more universal themes. I wonder if that is partly what was so frustrating about the storytelling of the revival.

[kylermalloy]

This has probably already been said, but I have to talk about the courtroom scene and why it was a fantastic introduction to not only Levi, but Erwin too—and their relationship.

So we first meet Levi in the heat of battle. We see very quickly the type of fighter he is—confident, but not overly so. He has a strong command of himself and the people under him. He’s The Guy.

Then Erwin shows up and announces they’re pulling back—Levi immediately argues this. We might assume Levi is being set up as the guy who ~doesn’t do well with authority.~ You know the type. He does his own thing. Doesn’t play well with others. Chafes under orders. He’s too big and too important for all of that!

This impression continues when Eren meets Levi and Erwin in the dungeon. Levi is rude and mouthy, and Erwin’s chastisements do little to curb this. Levi’s confidence and skill give him authority issues…right?

So then we move to the courtroom scene, Eren’s trial. Erwin says beforehand that he has a plan, but we’re told nothing more. We see him propose to the court that Eren be given to the Scouts, and he says nothing more.

Levi is the one to scathingly go after the MPs during the debate, pointing out the flaws in their plan and how likely it is that they’re trying to save their own skin. First time viewers might assume that, again, while Erwin is a charismatic leader, he doesn’t go far enough. Levi is the one to say the quiet part out loud, to go to the places Erwin’s too ~respectable~ to go.

Then things start to go sideways. The court’s favor seems to be turning against Eren and the Scouts, fear and paranoia winning out. Eren is getting desperate.

Enter Levi.

And we get this glorious scene. Levi convinces the court that Eren is harmless to the likes of someone like him. Their best bet is to do what Erwin asked and give Eren to the Scouts. Please.

(Notice how Erwin is not shocked, nor does he try to stop Levi.)

Now again, to a first time viewer, this scene feeds into our preconceived notion of Levi. He’s the guy who isn’t deterred by silly things like rank or authority. He saw that things weren’t going Erwin’s way, so he took matters into his own hands. Maybe Erwin will be mad about this later, but Levi will shrug and roll his eyes and say “but I got results, didn’t I?” and Erwin will have no argument for that.

…Right?

Cut to the next scene, after the court has granted the Scouts custody of Eren—and Erwin’s like, “sooo…sorry about that. We had to make it look good.”

This whole thing was planned by Erwin.

The scene was more or less staged by the Scouts. Erwin wanted to present himself as the calm, collected leader with clean hands. And Levi was the one to do the dirty work, be the brutalizer—even though it was all on Erwin’s orders.

He’ll play that role. He’ll be the rogue, the rough one, the problem child, because his personality fits so well into that niche anyway. But he does it because Erwin wanted him to. If Erwin had wanted him to stand nice and quiet the entire time during the trial, if that’s what needed to be done, Levi would’ve done that instead. He’s not looking to get results; he trusts Erwin’s methods and does what he’s told.

And in this case, he was told to beat up this helpless brat. Gladly.

(How much do you want to bet one of the MPs said to Erwin after, “you need to keep your dog under control.” I would simply implode.)

Like, if this display will land anyone in trouble, it wouldn’t be Erwin—it would be Levi. Levi’s the one who got violent and mouthy during a military trial. He broke rank. He attacked the defendant. Erwin isn’t, ostensibly, responsible for this at all. Levi willingly put himself in that position because he trusted Erwin.

And so everything we thought we knew about Levi is turned on its head! Eren even says so in the next episode—he expresses surprise that Levi’s so diligent about following orders.

Eren, silly boy, assumes that being skilled means you don’t have to take orders from anyone. But Levi does. It’s his whole character. (Notice how, despite him ending up being the oldest member of the Scouts, he’s never in line for Commander? He’s the hands, not the head.)

And this whole thing provides so much insight into Erwin’s character as well! Pyxis says at the beginning of the episode that Erwin is very straight-laced. Well, by the end of the episode, we can see that’s…not quite true.

Erwin is conniving, willing to play dirty, do whatever it takes, to get things to go his way. All while keeping his own hands clean, maintaining the image of the honorable Commander. He simply uses the tools at his disposal (Levi) to do the dirty bits for him.

It’s a fantastic introduction to the Scouts, their leader, and his right hand (or is it the left hand that does the dirty work?)

[howlsofbloodhounds]

Tag: @unamzi

my contribution to the “give skeletons your period cramps” thing is actually to say that if killer were capable of having periods, he would eventually lose track of when it is likely to happen—due to all the resets, and very likely the withholding of information such as dates and time from him by Chara and or nightmare.

he would only ever suspect when his period is coming on due to unusually intense reactions from his body—such as sudden becoming aware of how exhausted and fatigued it is, sudden lock ups in parts of its body from either dt clogging joints or times where bones were broken and healed wrong.

his soul’s light may even flare in response to any cramps, although due to his high pain tolerance and detachment from his body, he is not able to feel them except for in stage 1 or 3.

instead his biggest problems would be intrusive thoughts that feel dissociative in nature—easily agitated by things that didn’t bother him before and increase in murderous urges, and thoughts of self harm such stabbing his abdomen or the area where the blood is coming from—not particularly for seemingly any reason, such as the emotions associated with stage 1.

perhaps desire to be in pain, because the body is supposed to be feeling hurt during these times and it feels strange to be without. perhaps a desire to punish it for “betraying” him.

He is probably actually pretty self destructive during his time of the month. Would probably do strange things with the blood like finger paint. Might give it a taste if he’s curious enough. If nightmare or chara had issue with all the blood getting everywhere but there was no period products available or withheld from him he’d probably have to make do with stifling the blood.

maybe he just stops caring at some point and free bleeds, although perhaps only if doing so would irritate nightmare/Chara or otherwise make someone uncomfortable in a way that amuses him. Although I moreso see something like this happening if he can’t get or find anything to stop the bleeding, and trying to convince himself he has control over it by finding amusement in others disgust, irritation, or discomfort.

however, since periods are something he yet again has no control over, he’d likely find a way to keep control in any way he can just like if he ever found himself pregnant. i honestly think things like pregnancy and periods would only greatly disturb him and further his sense of detachment from the body—and he probably has a lot of repressed hatred and rage and disgust towards his body.

at most he’s probably shove some old rags or shirts or toilet paper down there and basically tell the body to get over itself— while he probably actively makes it worse. there may be an uptick in his sadistic and masochistic tendencies (especially towards the body, but perhaps even anyone who provokes his irritation—although he is very unlikely to express things like annoyance or anger in typical ways, possibly by emotionally detaching further after even the most minor outburst), and he may experience an increase in paranoia and dissociation.

(and perhaps things like praise and validation from someone he trusts, like color, could help—although if it came from anyone else he’d probably immediately assume they are trying to manipulate him. and he is still likely to doubt even color, due to paranoia.)

so perhaps he will attempt to handle it himself, he absolutely will keep it an absolute secret and tell no one, and would probably avoid anything that could provoke a response from the body or him.

[stellocchia]

AU where, after escaping Nightmare and settling down with Color, Delta, and Epic, Killer starts feeling watched. Every moment of every day he can swear there is somebody looking at him.

He looks out into the crowd and keeps spotting a familiar cyan eye, but when he goes to show his friends there is nothing but the normal crowd of monsters around them. He swears to them that he's not making it up but, well, his mind isn't the most reliable. His memory isn't either. And the stress that comes from starting over and escaping an abusive situation certainly isn't making his paranoia better.

Sometimes he notices a monster leaving, and then, a few minutes later, that same monster comes from the opposite direction. He points that out to them, but they never seem to spot the discrepancies. They insist that it's nothing. Plenty of monsters look similar. Hell, with the whole Multiverse madness, a ton of folks look the exact same!

Sometimes he feels a cold brush against his bones as he's walking in crowded spaces. It could be mistaken for something accidental, but he knows better. Sometimes, it even inches close to his soul. Never touching it, but always close enough to feel uncomfortably familiar. His friends agree that that's inappropriate and they try to stick closer around him. To create a barrier to protect him. But they also insist that random creeps unfortunately exist everywhere. It means nothing, really. There is no one suspicious around when they look, just a crowd of regular-looking monsters. The kind you'd find anywhere.

Sometimes, he comes home, back to his and Color's shared room, and things have been moved. Not by much. It's always subtle, but Killer is nothing if not observant. Color says that maybe he just misremembers where he put them. After all, it's only ever Killer's stuff that's out of place. And Killer's memory is not too good to begin with. But Killer could have sworn that he left his charger plugged in, and now it's not. He could have sworn that he left the bug plushie Color gifted him on his pillow, and it's tucked under the covers. He could have sworn as much, but he can't prove it. And he's not a stranger to gaslighting himself.

Not so far away, Nightmare is watching. Studying him.

It's an art form to blend into the crowd, but it's so much easier for a shapeshifter. And, really, is he truly harming Killer when all he's doing is proving to him that his new friends don't trust him? Is he truly so evil when he's only trying to help?

Besides, Killer's memory is not so good. He struggles with a lot of mental health issues. Clearly, he needs an owner who can give him a proper structure, and those three are failing miserably at that. He should have never left, but Nightmare will be oh-so magnanimous and take him back. And then he won't have to worry about trying to figure out what's real and what isn't, because Nightmare will tell him!

[pessimisticpigeonsworld]

Look at this....☠️ https://www.tumblr.com/bohemian-nights/737003196544958464/fuck-rhaenyra-fuck-the-writers-with-this-sapphic?source=share

Fucking hell.

First off: I find it interesting the anon doesn't acknowledge that Laena x Daemon is also incest. Sure, she's not his niece, but she is still related to him. They love projecting their insecurities about their ship onto daemyra.

Second: yeah, HoTD choosing to make the Velaryons black then sidelining them massively is shitty and, sure, could be interpreted as racist. However, how is that Rhaenyra's fault? She didn't make Daemon marry Laena when he couldn't have her neither did she kill Laena. Condal and Hess chose to write out Laena's relevance (which already wasn't much outside of being Daemon's wife and Baela and Rhaena's mother) in order to give Alicent more screen time. But again, that's neith Rhaenyra's nor Emma D'Arcy's fault, stop blaming them (also Emma is good at playing Rhaenyra as she is written, the only issues are the writing, which aren't their fault). Op also chose to ignore the fact that Daemon actually is confirmed by GRRM himself to have loved Rhaenyra the most.

Moving on, once again the Rhaenyra antis are bringing up how Rhaenyra isn't "feminist". Literally no one in F&B is feminist by our modern definition. Visenya and Rhaenys are probably the closest, and even then, they aren't writing feminist manifestos (which apparently Rhaenyra is expected to for some reason). Alysanne, the most proactive queen regent, still enforced arranged marriages on her daughters and granddaughters. Rhaenys didn't advocate for Laena's right of succession in the book and in the show refused to support Rhaenyra long before Laenor's "death". Her antis hold Rhaenyra to unfair and unrealistic standards while making excuses for or ignoring other characters who don't meet them.

In that same vein, I still can't get over how Rhaenyra antis will say that TG aren't the conservative group. They say Rhaenyra isn't a feminist and that TG, the ones who are obsessed with male primogeniture and believe being gay, a sexually liberated woman, a child born out of wedlock, or not adhering to the equivalent of the Catholic Church make someone subhuman are the "progressive" group. It's delusion at its finest. Alicent and the greens are misogynistic and, because of them, women's rights in Westeros ended up more repressed than ever.

The fact that the op says that Visenya and Queen Rhaena are acceptable shows they have no understanding for TG or F&B. First off, TG would never support either woman. Visenya was hated by the Faith and most of the Lord's of Westeros, she was a warrior accused of witchcraft and dared to interfere with the misogynistic customs alongside Rhaenys. Rhaena was gay, something she wasn't allowed to live fully because the Targaryens chose to conform to Westerosi ideals. She was also robbed of her inheritance, even Jaehaerys acknowledged that Rhaena was the rightful heir, just as Aegon acknowledged Rhaenyra was.

As for the racist allegations, those come exclusively from Mushroom, someone who is far from a reliable source. Mushroom invented an entire woman to try to add "spice" to Jacaerys' story: Sara Snow. A woman of whom there is no record of, even though she was raised in Winterfell and supposedly married Jace. If Mushroom is willing to make up a whole ass woman to make the story more dramatic, why should we trust anything he says?

Yes, Rhaenyra ordered Nettles' execution, but that was because of her rumored relationship with Daemon and Rhaenyra's paranoia which had grown massively since Hugh Hammer and Ulf White's betrayal. Was it just? No. Was it racially motivated? According to Mushroom, maybe, but looking at Rhaenyra's character, it doesn't make sense.

Moving on, what exactly does op mean by "she's done too many things to claim she's been wrongly framed by the narrative"? By the time Nettles comes along, Rhaenyra hasn't done much that could be considered reprehensible. Op seems to have an issue with Vaemond's death, which Rhaenyra did order in the book. They seem to think that Vaemond "rightfully called her out" and was wrongfully killed.

She ordered Vaemond's execution after he declared her sons bastards in order to challenge Corlys' decision regarding succession. Keep in mind, Vaemond in the book is Corlys' nephew, not his brother, which moves him even farther down the line of succession. Vaemond not only was putting Rhaenyra and her sons in danger but was also trying to usurp all of Corlys' line, including Baela and Rhaena, who op seems to like a lot.

Yeah Rhaenyra is much harsher in F&B, but that hardly makes her evil and irredeemable. Queens Visenya and Rhaena were both harsh and even cruel sometimes, yet op doesn't think they're irredeemable monsters.

I do agree with op's anger over the sidelining of the Velaryons, as I said earlier, but taking it out on Rhaenyra is completely uncalled for. Rhaenyra wasn't a monster, anyone who believes that has frighteningly little reading comprehension. Rhaenyra's reign would have greatly helped women's standings in Westeros and pushed along gender equality. Ignoring that fact and blatantly saying the greens aren't supporting the repressive patriarchy is delusional and idiotic. The greens' actions were damaging in every way. Vaemond was far from an innocent victim, he was power hungry and misogynistic in both the show and the book. Keep your angry focused on the right people, don't take it out on a woman who had her whole life destroyed by the patriarchy.

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Oc! Oc! Oc!

Some yan oc hc with a cute chub GN reader

Yandere Serial Killer

Everyone was on edge. The amount of murders that occurred in your part of town amped up to a debilitating degree; to the point that the general public no longer walked outside. If the lack of people outside was bad enough, your buddy system was failing. Your roommate who worked at the same place used to walk with you from place to place only for them to recently have to move away due to family issues. 

Now you are on your own. 

To work. To school. To the store. You had to move as fast as you could. 

No more than 30…that's what you told yourself

30 minutes to do whatever you had to do before leaving. You couldn’t keep it together any longer. Suffering from the collective paranoia of the entire town you kept to yourself, no friends, no family, you were on your own. Even the people you know that you buy things from no matter how many times they smiled at you or offered their help. They couldn’t be trusted. No one could. 

“Oh (Y/n), how are you today? Everything okay on your walk over?”

It was Penn, the owner of the grocery store that was within 30 minutes. Smiley and bright before the events of the serial killer he was a known favorite. Even so you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything but the typical response.

“I’m fine.”

“How’s your jogging routine going? Are you still doing that?”

You huffed as you continued putting your items on the belt pretending to not hear the question as the same person that subjugated you to it in the first place. Before Mo you were fine with yourself exercising when you wanted and doing as you liked when you liked. But with a person like Mo there was no getting around it. Mo was your landlord, a nutty fellow that had an outward appearance of being a lovely parent over the tenants. In truth they were a crummy old person that liked to practice their helicopter parenting on everyone and her latest victim was you. 

Forcing you to run ‘to fix that weight of yours’ many times you had tried to inform them about the fact this was simply your body shape but she refused to listen. Promising to lock you out of your apartment if you should ignore their ‘advice’ again; you tested them one time and ended up sleeping outside your door before they woke up. 

You saw Penn make a face before ringing up the rest of your items. 

“H-heym you’re looking for a roommate…”

Your head snapped up as you were finishing your payment, as you cautiously asked. 

“How do you know that?”

He was blushing in embarrassment as he shuffled his feet.

“Your roommate suggested I ask you…I’m looking for a place.” Seeing the disbelief on your face he put his hands up in defense.”I-i have the money with me in cash if you want it right away.”

He seemed desperate and for as long as you’d known him never once did you question his character. Was it really okay to break your rule?

______________________________________________________________________

“Thanks so much for inviting me to take a look around (Y/n)! I really appreciate it!” 

Against your better judgement you let him come over and like a puppy he dashed around taking in every bit of the apartment. 

You shook your head as his eyes darted around the vacant room. A smile started to creep on your face as you thought of the possibilities…maybe he could be your new buddy. It’d be a shame if someone deprived you of that in these dangerous times.

Knock

Knock

“Hey (Y/n)! Who’s in there with you?!”

Your door unlocked and in came Mo smelling as if they dunked themselves in the worst smelling 

Perfume they could find. Trudging past you they came to look at Penn who was now also looking surprised at the gremlin who let themselves in. 

“Ohh my goodness is that you Penn? What are you doing here? I doubt they actually took the time to go ahead and invite you over.”

He laughed awkwardly as he sent a worried look over to you before centering back on the fast approaching landlord.

“A-actually they did. They let me come over to see the room I’ll be getting if they let me be their roommate.”

“Oh please, if you need a room I can do that and more for even half the price!”

Was your landlord really trying to hit on and steal your potential roommate? You just rolled your eyes as you leaned yourself on the nearby wall just waiting for Mo to get tired enough to show herself out. Unfortunately she didn’t plan to do that; and ended up attempting to flirt with him for nearly the whole afternoon. Looking outside it was getting dark out and you began to worry about Penn and against your better judgment you intervened. 

“Uhm Mo, hey I think you should be letting Penn leave seeing as it's getting late and a serial killer is at large.” 

“Oh you're such a worrywart (Y/n)! Penn’s a strong man; he'll handle himself. But if you want I can offer my room! It’s a suite–!”

“I-uh actually would rather not..if I was going to stay I definitely wouldn’t  be staying with you.”

“What?! And you’d stay with this chubby kid?”

You were going to blow it off, another statement to ignore but Penn apparently wasn’t having it. The man you’d never see so much as scrunch his eyebrows in anger held your landlord by their shoulders holding them at arm's length with a shadow on his face. Amazed and slightly worried for Mo you stepped in putting a hand on his lower back. Immediately he snapped out of it looking at you and his arms in surprise before releasing your landlord who grunted and angrily stpmped out of your door. You both sat in the silence of relief before you broke it. 

“I-if you do want to stay with me for the night, I don’t mind. And if you wanted to move in that’d be cool too, that is if she still lets you.”

“Ha-ha, thanks and if it's cool I’ll totally move in. But I can get home okay,” he headed for the door before turning with one last smile towards you. “I really appreciate it. I'll text you when I get home.”

“Sure, okay bye.”

You leaned against the door before leaning a bit as you imagined him being your roommate. 

Having someone around that defends you didn’t sound so bad. You shook your head as you went off to complete your chores. After all, you had to do some cleaning before your new roommate may start moving things in. 

____________________________________________________________

“Hah~hah (Y/n)--(Y/n)--(Y/n)-ergh! 

Disheveled and breathing heavily, Penn was sitting with his pants down in the hallway just outside your door. He tried to catch his breath while still replaying the euphoria that he felt just three minutes and 40 seconds before. Not only did he get to see your living space with the lights on but he even got to feel the plush warmth of your hand on his back. Penn growled silently as he thought of why you did but nonetheless it reminded him of his future plans for that night. 

He grinned as he sent the text to you before pocketing his phone and knocking on your landlord’s door. When it opened Penn batted his eyes and puckered his lips like he’d done so many times before.

“Oh Mo, I didn’t mean to be so aggressive earlier! I was just playing with you, I do want to spend the night and I want to do it at your place.”

“Were ya? Well I’ll be, make yourself at home handsome while I freshen up.”

Penn smiled, pulling back his hair and putting on his beloved latex gloves. 

“Take your time dear,” he spotted the decorative knife block on display in the kitchen. 

“Take your time…”

[yanderes-galore]

Can I please request a romantic Cersei Lannister (GoT) scenario with an-ambivalent's prompt 19 and inuzkua's prompts 12 + 16?

Maybe darling is a hostage/prisoner that she develops a fascination with, or they could be from a family that depends on the Lannisters for protection? Darling tries very hard to keep a stiff upper lip about their situation but Cersei tries equally hard to get under their skin >:) I attempted to come up with an actual plot but failed - I can just so easily imagine Cersei saying these 😆

🕊️ anon

I despise Cersei in the show (I'm not far in, Season 2ish-) so I'm going to enjoy writing Darling's conflict in this. Who knows, I might like her the more I write for her. I purposefully made it vague when this takes place so it applies to all plot points. Just a warning, the start is a bit weak as I'm not good with build up. I should probably look for help when it comes to that in my fics ^^;

As usual, prepare for triggering themes, this is GOT after all.

Prompt 19 Here

Prompts 12 + 16 Here

Yandere! Cersei Lannister Prompts 19, 12, 16

"Your happiness, your tears, your love, your hate – all of it belongs to me."

“You liked it, didn’t you?”

“Denying me will only hurt you in the long run”

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Blackmail, Gaslighting, Forced kissing, Mature themes implied, Imprisonment, Trust issues, Possessive behavior, Mentioned Jaime x Cersei, Threats, Stalking, Harassment, Delusional behavior, Forced relationship implied.

Your House relies on the Lannisters for protection as most Houses do. Even if you despise the Lannisters, you can't defy them. You've seen what happens to those who don't listen to the royal family.

Those deemed untrustworthy are butchered like pigs. Their family, their House, threatened into submission or outright eradicated. The Lannisters require submission.

No matter the cost.

As a member of your House, you listened to the Lannister's orders. For the sake of your House's safety, you stayed stoic. You hate what the Lannisters do, but you can't bear the thought of your family being executed for your disobedience.

You thought you could get away with it. You thought you could do your job and not catch any attention. You wouldn't snoop for secrets even if you could tell the queen's children did not belong to the king. You never even spoke much unless you had to.

You kept to your duty... never saying a word about gossip...

Yet Cersei still managed to find you.

Cersei had her own reasons for keeping an eye on you. Originally it was because you could be a suspect for being a spy, perhaps you even heard something you shouldn't. However... Cersei began to realize her fixation on you wasn't paranoia related.

It was very similar to the many partners she's had... almost as intense as how she feels for her twin... you were an intriguing case to her...

One she simply must investigate.

For a long while she's been having you monitored. She excuses it as suspecting you of being a spy. Even to the point of ordering you around known gossip areas so you would have taboo information.

All while she watched you... falling for you further and further... it's not the first time she's been in love.

To explore her new feelings for you, a simple servant or guard, she calls you to a meeting. She gives you a message that you two simply must talk. A royal meeting without the council in her chambers. Obediently, you follow without question.

All while Cersei plans how to manipulate you into her desires.

"It's been difficult to find allies to trust..." Cersei admits, eyes never leaving your own. You're tense under her gaze. Meetings with the queen... never had good news. "I do assume your family is still loyal to the crown?"

"Of course, my queen." You agree, stoic and compliant. Anything else could easily mean death. Cersei hums when she notices your obedience, stalking closer.

"Tell me, have you been keeping yourself out of trouble?" Cersei asks, watching you tense under her scrutiny. "Do you know why I've summoned you?"

"No, my queen..." You answer, Cersei's gaze as predatory as a lion as she watches you. She stops in front of you, the queen's gaze glinting mischievously.

"What would you do for your queen...?" Cersei asks, watching your confusion in amusement. "Would you give anything to your queen? Would you sacrifice anything?"

You hesitate, but there's only one right answer to her question.

"Yes, my queen." You bark like the obedient lap dog you are, even if it pains you. You may hate the Lannisters, you may hate Cersei and her damned offspring and twin, yet you know how to survive. You know how to lie.

Although... Cersei knows how to lie better.

"Really? Anything?" Cersei pushes, stepping closer. You're stoic yet back up, the queen stalking you like the lioness she is. "You'd do anything to protect your queen? Even if it meant discarding your House?"

"Yes, my queen." You continue to parrot, your feelings untrue. Truthfully, you only do this for your family. The Lannisters can be banished to the Seven Hells for all you care.

"... you're a poor liar." Cersei frowns, making you freeze.

"What...?" You ask softly, Cersei looking unamused for a moment.

"Don't act so surprised, I see that look in your eyes." Cersei interrogates, pacing around you. "Your House has been suspected of having spies conspiring against the crown."

"My queen, I swear I haven't-" You try to defend yourself and your House, falling for the lies that spill from Cersei's mouth. The queen is rather good at manipulation, after all. She knows how to lie...

She knows how to back you into a corner like any good hunter.

"I've seen who you talk to. I suspect your loyalty to the crown is faltering. Now, tell me, are you a traitor to the crown?" Cersei murmurs, standing beside you. "Do you hate me? Do you hate my family?"

Cersei's gaze is clearly judging. Right now, she acts as your judge... and quite possibly your future executioner. The queen is accusing you of crimes you haven't commit...

A tactic she often uses to get her way.

A tactic she plans to use to wrap you around her finger... to make you hers....

"I am loyal to the Lannisters, my queen." You force yourself to say, dreading the proximity between you two. The queen hums again, thinking, before placing a hand on your shoulder.

"There's no need to hide it, you hate your queen." Cersei hisses softly. She already knew the truth, yet it still makes her bitter. "It doesn't matter... hate me if you wish... I'll just convince you to listen to my orders regardless."

You go to protest, to continues appeasing the queen, but she cuts you off. She stands in front of you now, two hands meeting your shoulders before trailing down to your hands. Her gaze is distant for a moment, gazing at something she knows she can't or shouldn't have...

But Cersei isn't new to controversy.

"Prove to me your loyalty and I'll spare your House." Cersei whispers, gripping your hands tight. You pause, the implication... unnerving. "Show me you'd do anything to please your queen, to avoid my wrath, and I will pardon you."

Cersei once again speaks as though you're guilty. You want to protest, to tear your hands away... but the fear of execution lingers in your mind. Your stoic behavior slips when she traces her hands over your attire, staring at you greedily.

Cersei was always a seductress to anyone around her....

"What will you have me do, my queen?" You answer, hoping to leave as soon as possible. Your thoughts pause when Cersei quickly grabs your chin.

"I want you to stay still... I've been craving this since I saw you..." Cersei whispers, pulling you forwards to press her lips to yours.

Her lips taste sweet like saccharine, yet feels like arsenic in your veins. Cersei seems to enjoy the kiss with you while you suffer. When the queen goes to deepen the kiss, to satiate her lingering desire that's been festering...

You pull away.

Cersei pants softly, but her tone flickers to annoyance when she sees you pull away. You pry her hands off you, only for her to hold your face. She stares into you... you can see anger bubbling before she smothers it.

“You liked it, didn’t you?” Cersei asks, already seeming to miss your taste. Her question is merely a command to get you to please her. She knows you hate her, she knows you hated the kiss, but she wants you to listen to her. She wants you to say you liked it... to obey her subtle threat.

You only care about your House, don't you?

Seeing your conflicted gaze only adds to her amusement... yet also her disappointment. She despises your hesitation almost as much as you despise her. Despite this, she waits for your response.

The tension thick enough even the sharpest blade couldn't cut it.

"... I did not, my queen." You choose honesty over your role, already sensing your fate being decided. Cersei's gaze flickers again before she hums, caressing your cheek again.

“Denying me will only hurt you in the long run.” Cersei warns, pulling you to look at her again. "I appreciate you showing your true colors... but I ordered you to listen to me. Did you like the little gift I gave you?"

This time you comply, nodding softly. Your stoic face breaks more and more. Her threat rings true in your ears. You know if you continue to play this game your life is in ruin.

"Yes, my queen." You answer, Cersei pulling on a smile.

"You are mine to do with as I wish, yes?" Cersei asks, gaze darkening. There was no use fighting her. You could hate her guts all you want, but you ultimately had to bend the knee to her.

"Aye...." You answer, hating how she treats you as some loyal hound. Cersei chuckles softly, enjoying the thought of breaking you.

"Your happiness, your tears, your love, your hate – all of it belongs to me." Cersei orders, caressing a hand down your body as she holds your chin. "Isn't that right? Don't you belong to me? Aren't I your queen?"

You swallow your pride, the thought making uou nauseous. Her touch feels grating against your skin. It's possessive, tight, threatening...

A lioness playing with her prey.

"Yes..." The response feels like it's tearing your throat apart. "I am loyal to you... my queen."

Cersei shows satisfaction at seeing you submit to her order. She grins for a moment, expression sly as she leans closer. She holds your chin up, observing you quietly.

"That's pleasing to hear..." She whispers, grip tightening all of a sudden to make you gasp. "I will spare your House... but..."

Her grin is devilish, kissing your cheek teasingly.

"I still must imprison you for conspiring against me. But do not worry..." She whispers, seeing the fear on your face. "The House you care so much for will be safe...."

It's then Cersei orders guards to take you away, ordering them to be gentle as they drag you to a cell. Cersei grins, still satisfied with the fact she toyed with you. Off you go to your cell...

She masks it as punishment, a punishment for conspiring against her... for hating her...

In reality, it's just meant to keep you close to her... forever hers... reliant on her at all times.

[princessoftheturtles]

I want to talk about how Deadpool was shown in films in contrast to the comics.

In films, his problems look solvable, which is not true at all.

In the movies, it looks like his problems are situational and he can handle them.

Wade is afraid that Vanessa will not accept his appearance after Weapon X, but at the same time, he calmly walks without a mask in front of Weasel, Domino, Cable, Dopinder, etc.

Then Vanessa accepts him, and he seems to no longer have issues about his appearance.

In the comics, he almost always wears a mask. He hates being seen without it when he doesn't give permission. This fear and reluctance to be seen gets to the point where he can sometimes stay in his suit for weeks due to paranoia. It all comes to the point where he almost kills people if they see him because he has a very shaky psyche, and even this can get him down. And people constantly talk about what a freak he is, etc., which doesn't help at all. In the film, Wade calmly accepts Weasel's mockery, when in the comics, he would have already smeared him for it. And Weasel is one of the people closest to him.

This is not a problem that can be solved purely because Vanessa accepts him.

He is suicidal after Vanessa dies in the films, which looks like it could be solved by just bringing Vanessa back. When in comics he constantly struggles with PTSD, depression, drinks and does drugs, catches constant hallucinations and cannot understand where reality is and where it is not, he has constant memory lapses and this is not even a complete list.

This affects his relationships with people; this cannot be solved by simply being loved. But therapy won’t help him either, his brain is broken and it’s practically impossible to fix it due to cancer and regeneration.

In the films, even his hallucinations were shown only once when his brain was pierced and then they were more of a comedic element than a serious problem that Wade suffers from in the comics due to the fact that his regeneration constantly rewrites his brain.

In the films, a huge emphasis is placed on his relationship with Vanessa and this is a kind of rom-com with a superhero, but in the comics everyone can’t stand him and he is constantly kicked out of everything, constantly mocked, etc.

This is the story of a man who cannot fit in anywhere, who is doomed to be alone and lose all his loved ones. He isolates himself from everyone because of his mental state. And Wade doesn't want people to feel sorry for him and help him because he doesn't see any value in himself.

On the one hand, it is fair that he is not accepted because he does not have a moral compass, but a moral weather vane that points to where he can be paid more money.

But in the films it looks like the X-Men want to accept him and he pushes them away.

But the X-Men and Deadpool have a very complicated dynamic.

I thought that maybe Wade is annoying the X-Men, the Avengers, etc., although in theory he cares about them in his own way and helps, purely so that they have a reason to hate him, and he has a reason not to get attached to them (although he kinda failed here). Wade is relatively kind, but he deliberately hides it far away and doesn’t show it. he can be caring, even if it looks like “I will help you, fuck you over and spit on you, but if anything happens I will be on your side.”

In the comics, he has huge trust problems. And Ness is one of the reasons. She at first turned out to be a mutant, a mercenary, and also worked for the opposite side.

I love Vanessa from the movies, but their relationship in the comics, their toxic dynamic is one of the MOST important parts of Wade's story and it was almost completely removed.

Betrayal, love for Ness, and her death are the things that haunt him constantly.

I'm sure a lot of people have already talked about this, so no, this is not a new idea or anything, I'm just pointing out what's already there.

This is not an attempt to criticize the films or say that they are bad, not at all. I just wanted to say that the comic Wade and the Wade from the films are two different people.

[cowboyjen68]

hi jen, i just followed you and this is really random but ive seen some of your posts helping younger people and it really struck a cord and i need to just let the words fall out of me.

ive been having issues with my girlfriend she cheated on me but this situation is very complicated and we're both fucked up people but i know she still loves me and i really love her. but my anxiety and our lack of communication is really bad right now and im so worried she might not love me the same anymore

ontop of this im 18 and for the past id say 5ish years my mental health and family life has been getting worse, getting diagnosis is hard especially with mentally ill and just overall bad parents that somehow dont understand or believe. i know im deppresed and have been i have anxiety, sever paranoia maybe bpd and bipolar and autism and everything is just so much. now the one person i had is something thats making everything hurt more and i just don't know where to go, im trying to get help but its so slow in this country and i feel so lost and tired i barely eat now and when i do its ether rare or unhealthy and everything is so much i want to collapse.

i hope this isn't to much to randomly send anonymously but you just seem really kind and helpful. thank u for your reply if you do

HI and please accept my apologies for the delay on answering this. I am sorry you are going through so much. My kids are adopted from foster care and I had many kids in my home for up to 5 years who eventually went back home. That is to say I have a lot of experience with mental illness, the systems that treat them, trauma and kids who came from unstable home lives.

At the ripe old age of 18 you have plenty of time to find love and contentment but right now might not be the time. I understand there might be odd circumstances that caused your girlfriend to cheat on you. If you feel betrayed and lost trust that is a feeling that is next to impossible to overcome for people with no comorbidities let alone a teen trying to figure herself out and deal with navigating the broken mental health/care system.

It is actually quite normal for young love to change and get redefined into friendship even when the circumstance are the best. Her cheating on you might very well be a sign that your relationship is in flux and not what you thought it was. A romance that has run its course is not a failure, relationships do not have to last forever to be important and real and worth having had.

It might be scary to think of not being with her, of not having your "one" person that you can count on but I do believe you can get farther working on yourself if you put time and energy into you and not dividing it up between you and her.

There is a lot of precedent set for women to set aside their romance and intimacy in order to be just friends while one or both does some work on herself. Sometimes it is necessary to stay involved for emotional support or financial support, that is just the reality of our world. Living single can be very difficult.

Please consider letting go of the relationship in its current form and putting your energy of yourself. Letting go of the stress of trying to repair what you had with her will remove so much pressure from you and from her that you will feel much more ready to tackle your mental state.

I promise. You are not a failure, she is not "the bad guy" in this story. Take all the wonderful things you shared with her keep those with you when you want a reminder that it loving her was worth your time even if it didn't end like you planned.

Seek mental health help but starting small. A therapist can help you begin to talk through things and often she can help you find additional resources like a medical Dr, public subsidies for insurance or free clinics to assist you in getting medication and mental health support. Most counties have a social services office and those employees are a wealth of information.

[shellyswirlz]

I updated my rentry a bit and does this sound mean? I tried to be as nice about it but I feel like maybe I sound mean

I have self esteem, anxiety, and paranoia issues

I understand why some people are uncomfortable with sharing because of bpd or abandonment issues (trust me I understand that all too much, especially the issues with abandonment), but I don’t want nonsharers to treat me like I’m a bad person just because I’m friends with someone who has the same kin or selfship as them, i don’t want them to try and make me feel like I’m responsible or that it’s my fault for it

It's ok dw you're not a bad person at all!!! That wasn't mean! /gen

Also yeah I get it cause I probably have bpd myself., 😭

And I have a like... Special emotional attachment to my crush so anyone saying something romantic about him (It's usually strangers calling him beautiful or handsome with the "😍" emoji) makes me feel like I'm gonna cry which is stupid.,,

ESPECIALLY when they're screaming in all caps..

"OMG HE'S SOOO HOT 😍" like OK he is very hot...But please go away wtf..,, :'D

I'm trying so hard to get this fixed because he's a fictional character, and people are allowed to scream over him.. He's like a celebrity.,,, But I've grown too attached to him it genuinely hurts me inside seeing so many people scream in all caps over him or act all romantic or sexual over him..

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

me when people are hating on Ouma's actions in game like. I just support him, actually

Ves: REAL she looked good doing it

if it were me I would get more crazy for a lot more selfish reasons, and I would punch Kaito back sooner, good for him for keeping his eyes on the goal

fr fr, look at him in the closing argument, that's my babygirl

Ves: the closing argument artist thinks so too

he did not have to go that hard but HE DID IT FOR ALL OF US. A HERO

haters will act like he's irrational, but he stuck out so long with no support system since he couldn't trust anyone and managed to play things off even when he was finally starting to lose his shit in a situation when it was reasonable for him to feel like this (tbh even fans make him often crack way more easily to make shipping content, when he's so resilient and then on the other hand not really lone wolfing it either bc he cooperated as much as he could) his way of going about things was smart, there isn't much else he could do, Tsumugi was setting up others to distrust him as well

Ves: AAAAAAAAAAAUGH!!! he did he lasted so fucking long in the worst possible situation he tried so HARD to cooperate and it just. did not work. if i think abt how quickly his plans fell apart i will explode i'd b doing so much worse in his situation

sometimes it's just like, you're talking about paranoia? trust and attachment issues? untreated mental illness? I think we have to be introduced, there's so much I could show you. I am not saying he doesn't have anything of the sort, but there's a lot more of reasonable justified distrust there, and still, it could be so much worse, trapping the next person who thoughtlessly assigns him diagnosis in a demonizing way in a room with me and making them listen to me rant about my failed relationships history for educational purposes

they will learn about all kinds of issues

Ves: it's trueee people act like he's so strange for breaking down but LIKE??? HE'S PRETTY NORMAL FOR THAT ACTUALLY???? he clearly already had Issues but the killing game was perfectly packaged to dig into those this is why DRS and UTDP mostly suck at characterizing him they're still stuck in the idea of him at his absolute worst he was nicer even in ch1 than he is in some of those events

[and then my amazing wife dropped this bomb, and she says I'm the smart one smh] Sini: The thing is, there’s him being shitty on purpose and him pretending to be the mastermind/making himself appear suspicious. There is a clear difference in how he acts. In DRS and UTDP he usually just comes across as playful. Yeah he’s a jackass, but I think his whole “bad guy” persona (the one we see in the beginning of the game) goes beyond the killing game. I see it as a way for him to protect himself, to push people away and not appear as vulnerable. As he’s said before, everyone always sees him as a villain so it’s the perfect role for him. I think that reasoning goes beyond what was happening to him in canon. I do agree his characterization could’ve used a bit more reworking, but I think for the most part they did a good job in showing how differently he acts in a peaceful setting in small ways. The fact that he never uses his scary sprites once or is seen to be more nice with characters like Mikan and Gonta. Especially with Gonta, where he seems to be more vulnerable around. And while this was probably just a mistake, I like to think him being shown as not as pale in DRS as a sign of him getting better. In a non killing game environment he seems to be doing pretty well for himself. But that’s what I believe, anyway

Ves: h that's really sweet actually,,,i may have been a LITTLE hard on the side modes. it's mostly the way he treats kiibo that drives me INSANE, the mikan n gonta stuff is [ok hand emoji].

Sini: Yeah, I agree. I can understand the Kiibo hate, but he doesn’t have to go as hard as he did in game. It’s not like there is a reason to suspect him. The only thing that could maybe explain it is maybe he suspects he could be tied to Monokuma? Since he, the Monokubz, and Monomi do exist here. He was rude to Monomi and seems to suspect her of being not what she seems ALSO, he’s always gonna be a little shit cause he’s a greedy whore. He wants attention and entertainment so badly.

Ves: THISSSSS it's so important i have seen so many people question why he does things where the answer is literally just that he wants attention like there is not always a plot sometimes he just wants shuuichi to chase him

Sini: That’s all there is to it He wants his crush to chase him like in his favourite novels Live the fantasy

Ves: it's part of why they're so good together!! shuuichi as a detective is v used to obsessing over details and giving his whole attention to something in the way kokichi wants HE'S A NERD THAT ALSO EXPLAINS MANY THINGS

Sini: They’re both nerds. Even more reason to why they are soulmates

Ves: kokichi receives the Detective Stare and goes TEEEEEHEE

Sini: IT’S HIS DREAM COME TRUE It’s just like anime! He’s living anime rn

Ves: i think his hair should curl up at the ends when he gets excited as a treat

Sini: To compliment Shuichi’s sentiment ahoge When he goes to his room after an exciting day with Shuichi, he flops on his bed, kicks his feet, and squeals into his pillow

I feel a little ashamed when reverse happens and I am posting something someone else started and I took over, but with this all I can say: follow @vespertin-y and leave nice comments for my wife so we can prove it to her that she is smart and her takes are divine.

[quietwingsinthesky]

Do you agree w/ the fandom interpretation that john was so homophobic he’d have beaten up and abandoned his sons for being gay? Cause sure, he grew up in the 60s as a mechanic and then later became a marine during the vietnam war, but i also don’t think homophobia would’ve necessarily been a priority for him? Like obviously he’s not gonna be the full on supportive and politically correct loving dad, but i think that the fandom’s general opinion on that is pretty warped by people’s relationships w/ their own fathers

I do think this is one place where people tend to project. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that; working out our issues through fiction is healthy and good! I don’t think there’s any canon proof of it beyond, as you said, him being a marine from the sixties who would probably not be super knowledgeable about being queer, maybe a little apprehensive about it from what he’s absorbed through the culture he grew up in. I think we’d be correct to point out that if Sam or Dean were queer, he might be uncomfortable about it, he might try to avoid the topic, which is in of itself hurtful.

The thing about me is: I fully disagree that John was ever physically abusive towards his kids. At most, I will bend this interpretation to say he was probably too harsh on them while teaching them to fight and that maybe he and Sam have traded blows before when arguments got too loud (by blows, I mean, probably shoving with the yelling, you know, assertion of physical space. It seems realistic to me that two people who have been using violence for a long time to protect themselves, and for John, his family, down to the hierarchal power he’s put in place of him -> Dean -> Sam, would resort to it when things got too heated.)

(I also think that sometimes fandom’s insistence that John had to be physically abusive can sometimes get a little insulting because it perpetuates the idea that emotional abuse does less harm and can be overlooked and for flattening out John’s character in a way the show very literally pointed to and said He Did Not Do That. This is the entire point of Max’s episode in s1, for the show to point out that their experiences of abuse were different. How well it was handled is arguable, but I take it as clear evidence that when we talk about John’s relationship with his sons, the focus should be on the emotional abuse, the codependency he developed with Dean from a very young age, his neglect of them both, his attempts to suppress Sam, etc. And I appreciate this about the show, because you can’t talk about any of those things without also talking about why they’re happening, why John thinks this is necessary, how he loves his sons and isolates them to protect them and ends up doing more and more damage that will never leave them through their entire lives.

I’m sure there’s depictions of John being physically abusive that handle it with the same amount of nuance that the show handles him being emotionally abusive in canon. I have not seen them, unfortunately. I’ve seen John being physically abusive 90% of the time just being used as shorthand for him being Bad and Evil and A Terrible Father. Which does not interest me. So I will remain here as a staunch defender of He Would Not Fucking Hit His Kids.)

Sorry, okay, we got off topic there this is about gay shit.

The point of All Of That was for me to be able to say, John’s not going to react to his sons being queer by beating them. He’s definitely not going to abandon them. Hello? John Winchester? Abandon his kids? John Winchester, the guy who has been keeping them in warded up motel rooms their whole lives and moving them across the country out of paranoia the demon who killed his wife could find them if they say anywhere too long? John Winchester who only trusted one or two people to ever look after his sons when he went on a hunting trip too long? We think that John would ditch his kid because they’re queer???

Like I said, I think the most realistic reaction for John, (if not just flat out him going ‘that’s fine, now load this gun while I time you because that’s more important for me to know that you can do’, because. He kind of has bigger priorities to worry about here. Like werewolves.) would be discomfort and pushing it out of his view, ignoring it. Which would still fucking hurt! And would have horrible effects on Sam and Dean both, would encourage Dean to repress it if he thinks his dad is ashamed of him, would push Sam away if he trusts John with this fact about himself and can’t be accepted easily.

I just think this is truer to John’s character.

Anyway. If nothing else here persuades anyone reading that John Would Not Fucking Do That, well. He thought his kid was demonspawn, remember? He thought Sam was corrupted and might not be able to be saved. I don’t think you can get more clear queercoding than that, and you know what John’s very telling response was to that information, to finding out something a thousand times more terrifying than Sam being gay ever could be? To refuse to look at it. To insist to himself that whatever Hell wanted with Sam, he wouldn’t let it happen. To tell Dean to take care of it, because even when John is certain that his son might literally become a demon, he could never bring himself to pull the trigger on him. Because he loves Sam.

So like. He literally would not do anything for the much smaller realization that Sam is gay. His son has demon blood that might turn him super evil, and John still wouldn’t hurt him.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is, I try to keep the fact that John loved his sons at the forefront of my mind when I’m writing stuff about him, because I think if you let that slide out of your head, you can very easily make him much worse, much more flat than he was in canon. The real picture of him is just an extremely flawed man in a terrible situation who fucks up his kids as much as he protects them.

And also he wouldn’t care about them being gay because JohnAzazel real and true and they fucked sloppy in that hospital basement-

[a-v-j]

"Does Anti_Error still sometime behave like Geno!Sans/Error!Sans, considering that in the Aftertale Comic, when Geno showed his soul to Sans, he mentioned: "You've probably noticed something odd. But couldn't place it, right? Maybe something missing? Or odd behaviours things you don't normally do? Maybe issue with memory? At least these are things I noticed.", which was actually shown as well after their encounter in part 5, where Sans started laughing about the meaningless of everything, before recovering and questioning where that came from."

"Since this leads to the second question, wouldn't Error!Sans/Geno!Sans's personality be much more powerful if Anti_Error is copying them, since they are linked to his soul and Sans was already sometimes acting like Geno. At least, maybe make him realize that he found something that was missing, but Anti wouldn't know what that would be because, he forgot most of his life."

"It would be interesting if the Geno!Sans/Error!Sans's personality could pull what Nightmare's one did, even if Ask Errors showed otherwise, maybe long usage of the copy or copying somebody like Recall and Hobo who are Anti's Geno theoretically would make this happen. And could Recall or Hobo force or erase memories from Anti's mind, like Geno was able in Aftertale: "Oh. Now you care about what's happening to Sans? Heh. If you must know. I'm making him relive your worst resets.""

"And lastly, since in the original Ask Error, Error was able to remember his past, would copying a normal Aftertale!Sans(Classic)/Geno!Sans make Anti remember?"

"Now, onto another topic, though this might be asking for spoilers even if the comic has been in hiatus for a long time, but from what we've seen in the MOE comic, why didn't MOE!Geno turn into MOE!Oobleck instead of MOE!Fatal_Error, since he only became aware of the player after his transformation into MOE!Fatal_Error, and his ending the timeline forever plan failed as well, so he had no reason to stick around. Your answer only explained how MOE!Geno was still there. Is the comic ever gonna be continued?"

"Anyway, if MOE!Error would be theoretically revived as a Classic!Sans of an Aftertale timeline, meaning he remember his entire life, and realize that MOE!Fatal_Error was Geno, what would he do at that point? Obviously, I think he would hate, dislike or at least never trust any other self, maybe some paranoia. Let's say he is revived before Chara/Frisk fall down so the resets cannot take his memory."

"Do you think he would even try to do something at that point, considering everything failed, so he would just let Frisk and Chara ran without interfering, or would he try to convince using his knowledge that Chara's personal vendetta is unjustified considering they have killed monster kind too many times to be considered punished for them killing the fallen humans? He could have seen a pacifist end as MOE!Error."

"And if by any chance, he would met Fatal, do you think he would even care at this point, knowing that HQ/MOE!Fatal_Error would kill him if he acted violently. Would he just pretend he never knew Fatal and move forward?"

"Does Anti_Error still sometime behave like Geno!Sans/Error!Sans, considering that in the Aftertale Comic, when Geno showed his soul to Sans, he mentioned: "You've probably noticed something odd. But couldn't place it, right? Maybe something missing? Or odd behaviours things you don't normally do? Maybe issue with memory? At least these are things I noticed.", which was actually shown as well after their encounter in part 5, where Sans started laughing about the meaningless of everything, before recovering and questioning where that came from."

nope! however, he does says he feel more familiarity with recall/hobo, pretty much that how far it extends

"Since this leads to the second question, wouldn't Error!Sans/Geno!Sans's personality be much more powerful if Anti_Error is copying them, since they are linked to his soul and Sans was already sometimes acting like Geno. At least, maybe make him realize that he found something that was missing, but Anti wouldn't know what that would be because, he forgot most of his life."

think it will only does so if the geno/error anti's copying is recall's/hobo's, but he never shifted into those form(and i dont think it'll really take over like how nightmare's did, sure it'll most likely come out from brief outbursts but it'll only pretty much it). we did see him turn to a geno one time, but it wasnt his geno(as so far as i can remember that is)

"It would be interesting if the Geno!Sans/Error!Sans's personality could pull what Nightmare's one did, even if Ask Errors showed otherwise, maybe long usage of the copy or copying somebody like Recall and Hobo who are Anti's Geno theoretically would make this happen. And could Recall or Hobo force or erase memories from Anti's mind, like Geno was able in Aftertale: "Oh. Now you care about what's happening to Sans? Heh. If you must know. I'm making him relive your worst resets.""

i think those that can only happen in the savescreen, or even if they can do that outside the said savescreen, recall doesnt have the need to(plus he doesnt know anti was his classic)/hobo doesnt even remember anti was the classic he tried to manipulated when he was geno or the fact he was geno-

"And lastly, since in the original Ask Error, Error was able to remember his past, would copying a normal Aftertale!Sans(Classic)/Geno!Sans make Anti remember?"

ever since working in the HQ, anti already knows how a geno's story goes, copying into one will only yield him the same info. sure, it might give him some familiar flashbacks but he has copied a handful of sanses that he sometimes mixes their memories with his, plus his geno's(which is now recall) had a slight different happy ending path than most geno's. so he'll need to copy his own geno's(in this case ecall) to have the most familiar head jingles, wont necessarily make him remember tho still

"Now, onto another topic, though this might be asking for spoilers even if the comic has been in hiatus for a long time, but from what we've seen in the MOE comic, why didn't MOE!Geno turn into MOE!Oobleck instead of MOE!Fatal_Error, since he only became aware of the player after his transformation into MOE!Fatal_Error, and his ending the timeline forever plan failed as well, so he had no reason to stick around. Your answer only explained how MOE!Geno was still there. Is the comic ever gonna be continued?"

moe!geno does split into moe!fatal(hq!fatal) and oobleck, it will pretty much happen on the next page of the most recent Margin of Error comic page but yknow, i have zero motivation to continue right now. moe!geno's already a bit aware theres something beyond frisk or chara but he hadnt confrrmed his hunched by then yet

"Anyway, if MOE!Error would be theoretically revived as a Classic!Sans of an Aftertale timeline, meaning he remember his entire life, and realize that MOE!Fatal_Error was Geno, what would he do at that point? Obviously, I think he would hate, dislike or at least never trust any other self, maybe some paranoia. Let's say he is revived before Chara/Frisk fall down so the resets cannot take his memory."

"Do you think he would even try to do something at that point, considering everything failed, so he would just let Frisk and Chara ran without interfering, or would he try to convince using his knowledge that Chara's personal vendetta is unjustified considering they have killed monster kind too many times to be considered punished for them killing the fallen humans? He could have seen a pacifist end as MOE!Error."

"And if by any chance, he would met Fatal, do you think he would even care at this point, knowing that HQ/MOE!Fatal_Error would kill him if he acted violently. Would he just pretend he never knew Fatal and move forward?"

the story went a bit differently, all i can say.

could i interest in you in other lores, like avjverse-originally-induced storylines, at this point it makes me think youre testing the canon-ness relatability of MOE to Aftertale. as you can see, im down to zero motivation with margin of error, therefore my focus isnt in that storyboard. dont get me wrong, id love people doing a neat analysis on my story but it looks like its more focus on the relatedness/crossreference-ness to aftertale than digging into the MOE story itself and those other non-aftertale plots it influenced(if youve picked up some hints), dont wanna sound picky or anything but this stack o' questions kinda brain-aching for me yknow?