#trans taka

[blecbleh]

Happy Holidays @krynutsreal ! Sorry you had to wait so long for your gift but when I got asked to make yours I was so excited! Hope you enjoy the girls on their winter date ! <3

@ishimondoevents

[happykinzz]

more danganronpa cringe

[nvathuw]

Could you draw trans Taka PLSS, and maybe ishimondo

ok

ishimondo bonus

[picnokinesis]

Thoughts on Different Types of Representation in Doctor Who (and how fandom responds to it)

So I watched Rogue last night and - okay first, oh my days, absolutely ADORED it, this is definitely my favourite episode of this season, it was just so much FUN and it hooked me right from the start. And then the queerness! I was actually thinking to myself whilst watching it how wonderful it was because it felt like a queer story in a way that wasn't like, showboating about how progressive it was? [editorial aside: this is not comparing it to anything in particular, just a general observation]. The characters were just queer, within this wild and wonderful sci-fi story, but also their queerness wasn't the Only Character Trait they had and their story didn't resolve around their queerness, but their queerness was crucial to the plot in a way that was just lovely to see - and as a writer myself, it's personally the way I love to see our stories being told.

But then I made the mistake of going into the tag - always a foolish thing to do, because for some reason everyone loves to praise this era by criticising the previous era (as if it hasn't been criticised enough...like we know most of y'all hate Chris Chibnall for committing no worse crimes than Moffat and RTD before him...we know). And I found a couple of folks talking about how this episode alone did more for queer representation than the entirety of thirteen's era, whiiiiich at first really Peeved Me Off - like didn't these people understand how important Yaz's arc (especially Eve of the Daleks) was to a LOT of people? But then I was like 'well actually this is interesting', right? Because I think there's two very different kinds of representation going on here - and they're both very important in different ways, but one tends to get lauded as brilliant rep and one always gets put down as not good enough, or even bad rep. And what's the main difference? Whether the characters have a gay kiss or not.

So I just thought I'd share some of my thoughts and feelings on this, and why I think both these kinds of rep are equally important! To be clear from the get-go though - this is definitely not me ragging on anyone who likes more about one than the other (in fact, I think everyone likes one more than the other). This is merely a personal essay about it and the frustrations that comes when people in general do lift one up over the other. I'm gonna put it under the cut though, because it might get a bit long!

So, back when Eve of the Daleks aired, I remember having a lot of conversations about the representation in that episode - in particular with a very good friend of mine, who is a lesbian. And we realised that when it came to rep, we both actually wanted pretty different things. I'm aroace and genderfluid, and so a lot of what I saw in how thirteen was written - especially in terms of her gender (or lack thereof), and also her apparent lack of attraction (at least, in how I read it) was just incredibly affirming to me. I've never EVER seen a character on screen that I could see myself in both in terms of sexuality and gender. Whereas my friend saw things quite differently - thirteen was a lesbian, and they wanted to see that kiss between these two characters, because for them too, it was so rare to see that, and, in their words, they wanted to have their cake and eat it too. And we both realised that the reason that queer representation can feel so intense and important is, simply, because there isn't enough of it. We're all desperately reaching for the same small portion - and none of it is ever going to please everyone, or resonate with everyone. The stakes are too high.

So then, when there wasn't this dramatic romantic ending to Yaz's story, when there was no queer kiss, I was very sad for my friend, who didn't get that representation, but so painfully relieved for myself - because I got mine. So then it sucked a lot to see a lot of people getting really angry that this wasn't queer representation, that this was even homophobic - I even had someone tell me that aromantic representation in this regard was always going to be homophobic, because no-one would ever write it to be aro rep, and would instead only ever write it to avoid writing a gay kiss. And the thing that got me the most was that, REGARDLESS of whether they kissed or not, regardless of how you read either of the characters, there was one thing that was certain:

Yaz was queer. In text. Her emotional plotline centred around her realising that she was attracted to the Doctor (who was presenting as a woman - although, again, I don't think she really identified as such). The fact that she and the Doctor didn't get together by the end does not erase that fact.

They didn't kiss - but so what? Are queer people only queer when they're kissing someone of the same gender, or having gay sex? Are queer people not queer in their day to day lives, when they're not doing any of those things? Are queer people not queer when they're not dating? Are queer people not queer when they're trans, when they're ace, when they're aro, when their queerness doesn't resolve around attraction to the same gender?

And, to be honest, I think a lot of my feelings around this stem from the sort of exclusionist rhetoric that we saw a LOT of towards the ace/aro community back in 2012 that we still see now, that we're seeing towards the trans community now, that we're still seeing towards bi people, for pete's sake. It's this in-community infighting, pushing each other down to try and get up to the top, to keep all the "resources" for "the people who really need it", and it causes a serious amount of harm - but the truth is (and to bring this back to doctor who) that it all comes back to what me and my friend were discussing. We're all scared, all desperate to be seen - and when we are seen, it's the most incredible experience and the idea of losing that (or having someone else undermine it) feels inexpressibly awful. Having the thirteenth doctor...I suddenly realised this is what all the straight cis white dudes get all the time. She was like me, and that was indescribable. And then losing her - and having RTD not even be able to have a man wear her clothes because he was too worried about what the tabloids would say to be able to show a gnc person on tv...and then constantly described her as The Woman Doctor for the next entire episode - that hurt. A lot.

I've spoken to other friends who felt so seen in the character of Yaz - those people who realised they were queer later in life, those who fall in love with people and it doesn't end up going anywhere, those who don't get the whirlwind queer romances that people often call 'good representation'. Myself and many of my aspec friends have felt so seen in thirteen's almost entirely romance-less arc, and myself and my trans/genderqueer friends felt very seen in the way that thirteen's character would have been exactly the same if she'd been a man - the only difference was how the other characters around her interacted with her. Gender was something that happened to her. And when I watch episodes like Rogue, even though I don't relate to that representation, I just feel overwhelmed with joy because I know how important it will be to others that I care about. I think my sadness then comes from the fact that the way Thirteen and Yaz were written are just as important to me and many people that I know, but because they didn't kiss, it's not considered queer enough. Am I not queer enough, then? Are my friends not queer enough?

We need more episodes like Rogue, like The Parting of Ways, like Praxeus, like The Doctor Falls, because they are unquestionably and unapologetically queer, in a way that can't be avoided. We also need more episodes like Eve of the Daleks, like The Haunting of the Villa Diodati, like the rest of thirteen's era where the representation is an undercurrent throughout the whole story - but also undeniable, in a way that Yaz's story arc is, even if it doesn't end in a kiss, even if it doesn't end neatly and happily. Personally, I definitely would love to see more stories focused on aromanticism and on transness (especially ones that are written by trans people for trans people, rather than by cis people for cis people), but that's probably going to be down to people like me and other writers that I know actually getting into the script writing industry - and that depends on the people who are already there letting us in. One thing that I've always appreciated about Chibnall is that, after leaving Doctor Who, he began a programme for training up new showrunners with ITV, because: "showrunners are the gatekeepers and too many of the gatekeepers look like me."

Anyway, I probably have more thoughts that I've forgotten, but that's generally the gist of it. I think the more we fight over whether rep is 'good' or 'bad', relating to whether we see ourselves in it or not (rather than 'is this genuinely harmful or unhelpful', which I think is a more crucial question) the more the waters get muddied. We have different needs and wants, and no single episode is going to represent every facet of our community. But each episode, each story like this is a step in the right direction - and even rep that isn't perfect (I have thoughts about The Star Beast, for example) is still extremely positive and important, and definitely something that should be celebrated, even as we keep looking to the future for what we would like to see done differently, done better. And some day, I hope, there'll be so much queer rep, it'll be so normal, that those stakes won't feel so high anymore. It won't feel like everything hangs on how a certain show or storyline or episode is written. We'll all be seen. And that will be absolutely fantastic.

[morangoowada]

Kiyotaka Week - Day 5 Lady

[pdqsketch]

Still having fun doing painting studies!

[le-agent-egg]

someone get her on estrogen

only reason the creators didn’t give her any E is because they knew she would serve too much cunt and take away from the rest of the cast

[takaloverr]

yall won't believe who i found at pride AGAIN

[brainfilehasstoppedworking]

You did this to me @fruit-punch-clown 🫵

Watch out for angst

《~~~~~》

Takaaki moved his head up from his partner's chest. Kijo stirring a bit. He listened to the sounds of his twin boys crying in the distance from the nursery. Takaaki looked over at the clock and sighed. He got up from the bed and went to check on the boys. He wished that…just once…maybe Kijo would give a damn. He wanted these boys far from him as possible, but he wanted to at least see that he cared.

It was okay though, he'll take care of them. Him and Aloysius. God, he was a godsend. The man became sort of a father figure to him since he was a teen, he was always caring for him. Supported him in any way he could. And he promised to take care of the boys along with him.

Takaaki opened the door to the nursery and saw said man already in there taking care of the boys.

He held them both his his arms, rocking them as they cried. "Shh, it's okay. It's okay."

"Aloysius? What are you doing up? You're off duty, remember?" Takaaki asked through a yawn. He rubbed his eye, taking his sleep away for a bit before taking the two boys from him. "I did tell you I'd help, Master Ishimaru. Didn't I?"

"Mm, that's true. But I can take care of them myself as well. You get your rest. The boys are probably just hungry. Ah. Mind holding them for a second?" He asked then, realizing he needed to remove his shirt and bra to feed them.

"Of course." He took them in his arms once again as Takaaki removed his clothes. "I'm sorry for having you up so late with them. And seeing this. I do recommend sleeping again. You'll need it for when I go to work and have to care for them." Takaaki said, smiling softly. "No, I don't mind. It'll be okay. It's my job as your butler and as a close friend." Aloysius said, nodding his head.

"Ah, what would I do without you? God, if only Kijo could do these things for me. Just…for a second. God, it's hard to love someone who hasn't loved you for years but you're stuck with him." Takaaki sighed. "Sorry for the rant, though."

"No need, Master Ishimaru." Aloysius said.

Takaaki took the boys into his arms again and started to feed them. "I'll never get used to this feeling. Heh. You know, if I had it my way, I wouldn't have had kids with him. But they're so perfect I'm glad as well. I wish they had a different father." Takaaki said. "I wish for that as well. Especially for your happiness." The older man said.

"You always this nice?" Takaaki asked.

"Hm, well, I guess it comes when you care for someone this much. Especially someone who you see as a son." Aloysius hummed as he said that. Takaaki smiled. When the boys had finished the two burped them before laying them back in their crib. "I think…I think I might just leave him. Maybe I'll have a better chance at raising them in a more loving environment than here. Especially away from him. Away from the rest of the Togamis," Takaaki inhaled.

"From having to hide away where no one will know that the amazing and powerful Kijo Togami knocked up Takaaki Ishimaru. A man. A man from a family shamed for the crimes of Toranosuke Ishimaru. My father." Takaaki said as he watched his boys drift to sleep. Aloysius put a hand on his shoulder, "Whatever you need to do, do it, Master Ishimaru. But I recommend staying here for a little longer until the boys have grown." Aloysius said.

He chuckled. "I at least want to care for them a little longer."

"Hm. Yeah. I think it'd be best. Especially with the Togamis. It's kinda a blessing that I married rich. It's…it's better for them. To at least have nice things that I can't give them later. Not with this shame I have to bear. Not with the hatred of others." Takaaki hung his head low. "Aloysius. If…will…will you take them in? I don't think I'd be able to provide for them. What they need." Takaaki didn't want to say this. But it would be best.

"No, I want you to be there for them. They deserve to be with you."

"But–"

"Takaaki," His grip on his shoulder grew more firm. A gentleness to it. A fatherly feeling to it. He's never felt this much fatherly love before. "You are a great father. You care for these two. You need to be there for them as best you can. I will help you. Don't abandon them." Aloysius said in a just as firm tone.

Takaaki stood in silence, looking back down at his two sleeping boys. "You're right." He only said.

The two watched the boys sleeping, the butler's hand leaving his shoulder. "I think we should both go to bed now. You're still off your work hours." Takaaki said. "Yes, it'd be best." Aloysius nodded. Takaaki did as well, then yawned again. The two quietly left the nursery after Takaaki played the music box his boys loved so much. A gentle lullaby playing. "Goodnight, Master Ishimaru." Aloysius said. "Goodnight, Aloysius." He replied back before going back into his and Kijo's room.

There, he laid back into bed with his head rested right back on his husband's chest. Takaaki hesitantly kissed Kijo's lips before laying his head back down and fell asleep. Thinking of his conversation with the other man. Thinking of a better life for his boys as he drifted off back to sleep.

[takaska]

hey if you find yourself running a blog that just seems to be about drama and who sent a gross message to whom or like. "ten years ago this person was mean to me" type beats, i think you need to get offline and focus on yourself. stop giving in to drama. stop parading people's past mistakes as "proof" they'll never change- when the truth is, you'd rather no one ever changes so you can be smarmy about it bc you actually hate yourself in your quietest moments

[fandompridehcs]

Kiyotaka Ishimaru from Danganronpa :

Kiyotaka is a gay, asexual, transmen who use he/him pronous (please)

Kiyotaka Ishimaru from Danganronpa Trigger Happy Havoc is a gay asexual trans man who uses he/him pronouns!

[c0smickidd0]

I’M SOBBING THEY LOOK SO GOOD!!!! Awww I love this SO much THANK YOUUU 😭💗

my @ishimondoevents secret santa gift for @c0smickidd0 !!

taka’s just tryna read and mondo’s getting kinda bored watching tv, or something like that. idk they’re just hangin out :p

[shsl-hubris-guy]

If you got to rewrite the Danganronpa series with the creative restriction that you can't change more than one survivor per game (as in, swapping one alive and one dead person) and freely move the deaths around (can you tell I didn't like Hiyoko's death?)

What changes would you make?

You've made good points of Kodaka completely lacking tact when handling serious subjects, like all the sexual stuff in these games about teenagers, or more personal issues with him like racism, but I'm curious how those kinda issues can be fixed

- Timeline Autism Anon

Oh, timeline anon. Sweet timeline anon. You have unleashed the beast.

So, you're specifying that the only change that can be made to the characters' order is that one dear and one living character can swap, no more shuffling beyond that. Intriguing. I've never worked under such constraints, but I welcome the challenge! And hell, for the fun of it, I'll even include UDG

TRIGGER HAPPY HAVOC- ONE SWAP

I'm saving Celeste here, 100%. While I did consider saving Taka at first, I think ultimately there's some foiling and narrative contrast to be has between his death and Hina's survival that I wouldn't want to go to waste but having them both live, and Celeste as the antagonist is just too tempting to pass up. It should come as no surprise, then, that the one I'm swapping in as the chapter 3 killer is Byakuya.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's break this down, chapter by chapter, on how I'd alter THH's overall story even with this being the only change to the roster order

CH 1

While I'm unable to save either Sayaka or Leon (or Mukuro) here, we can give a little more screentime to Leon, namely by giving him some more character scenes here and there. My first thought is to have him see Makoto and Sayaka in the hall on their way to the gym and offer to join them (safety in numbers) and ends up also being part of the "dream" conversation. There's some contrast to be has there between him and Sayaka as he insists on hating his talent and trying to find a new dream, and a couple different angles you could take with it. I think game leans towards him being shallow and lazy at first, but I'd much prefer an interpretation where he doesn't know what his dream is and supposes it's to find something he's passionate about.

CH 2

Step 1. Make Chihiro and Mondo trans (fem and masc respectively). Step 2. Really really push against gender norms and the idea of having to 'pass' and why that's harmful.

Bonus step! Jack is a fictive of a fictional murderer from one of Byakuya's fav mystery novels. Also she and Toko aren't the only alters. Also also they didn't continue to be in love with him after he outs them

CH 3

Ah, the meat of the changes. Having Byakuya as the ultimate killer is made even more difficult by the fact that Hifumi is both killer and victim, meaning that Byakuya can only be the killer of Hifumi and Hifumi must have a reason to kill Taka. So what do we do?

Byakuya has harped on the idea that you can't judge the motivations of others by your own experiences from the very beginning of the game. It stands to reason, then, that he could be inspired to take advantage of the money motive by knowing that no one in the class would suspect him, the ultimate Rich Guy, as killing for what's loose change to him, only for him to fall to his own logic. Makoto and Kyoko are smart enough to put together that he could take advantage of everyone else's assumptions, and Kyoko in particular doesn't make assumptions outright. So we have a reasonable and flawed-in-character motivation for him to act now.

So, why does Hifumi kill Taka? If Byakuya is the killer, does he end up being the one to steal Alter Ego? I think no. In this case, I think it's Hifumi himself who breaks, developing a connection to Alter Ego that turns to obsession when the rest of the class pointedly tells him no, and plots to escape with her. In his desperation, I think I'd like to play off of his almost-friendship with Toko to have her unknowingly play a part in his murder plan by swiping the laptop, appealing to her own hopeless romantic side to convince her to take it while he enacts his plan to kill Kiyondo. (Sidenote: give Kiyondo some FTEs, and have people actually mourn his death more. His death as a result of his isolation works much better if Makoto AT LEAST is aware that his death was preventable had they paid attention.)

Now, here's where things get interesting. Byakuya doesn't follow the nighttime rule, so assuming Hifumi goes through with killing Taka at night, he could find the body before anyone else. That let's him know another murder case is already taking place, and gives him the final push to act now. Hifumi is a sloppy killer, and Byakuya can take advantage of that. So he quickly retraces Hifumi's steps to find him attempting to pin the crime on Hiro, and does a bit of 'messing with the scene' again, only this time, he adds a corpse of his own.

The plan is easy. Kill Hifumi, leave all the easily-torn-apart evidence of Hiro being framed, let the class connect the dots. Hiro found out he was being framed and tried to silence Hifumi, but was too stupid to clean up after himself. Even if they manage to prove Hiro's innocence somehow, Byakuya actually *knows* to pick up after himself. He can remove any implication that he was ever there.

His mistake was Toko. Toko still had the laptop. And when Hifumi never arrived, she went out, not to find Hifumi, but to find Byakuya. Because Toko isn't stupid. Because Toko learned firsthand mere days ago that Byakuya CANNOT be trusted. And she finds him somewhere he shouldn't be, using the trash room key he stole off of Hifumi to dispose of the evidence. And in the end, it's Toko's testimony that proves his undoing. See, he knew she saw him. He just assumed she wouldn't speak out against him. He assumed he knew her motivations, that he was better. He wasn't.

His other mistake was Hiro. Hiro, for everything his classmates see him as, isn't stupid, and giving Makoto the chance to stand up for him and help clear his name the way Kyoko did in chapter 1 would be really great and was literally entirely possible to do within the main game without changing anything, seriously, why were they allergic to giving Hiro character moments or positive connections outside of gags that punch down-

CH 4

This one is easy. If you've ever seen the stageplay, you probably have a good idea of what I'm adding here. Celeste takes advantage of Sakura's sacrifice by being the only one not to attack her, helping her lock the door and watching her drink the poison, only to then turn on her and begin attacking, turning the case into a 50/50 gamble. Hina watches her do it. And Celeste stays in the room, waiting for her to find the others and break in. They won't let Hina kill her, no matter how much she wants to. That would just make her the new blackened.

I think Hina's downward spiral would be elevated by having such a specific target at first, only for Kyoko and Makoto to discover even more wounds and have to find the source of the injuries. Pushing her to try and tank the trial and kill everyone who hurt Sakura at once would be an especially interesting angle, her betting on it being the poison not to save everyone, but to kill everyone, Celeste included. Of course, the majority would likely end up voting Sakura regardless, and that leaves Hina to try and pick up the pieces after hearing Sakura's letter, and leaves Celeste- Taeko- to live with the consequences of her actions, having lost the gamble and lost everything.

CH 5

I think this is a Hiro opportunity to have him act like the older brother figure he was meant to be, particularly for Hina. I mean, she went through the fucking ringer last chapter, she deserves some space to sit with it and come to forgive herself, and Hiro, who was first to attack Sakura, being the one to give her that time and genuinely apologize would be a great moment for both of them. Similarly, I think Toko and Jack getting more comfortable with the other members of the cast and being less of a nuisance would be awesome. Jack is literally a serial killer alter; who better than her to sympathize with Taeko's insatiable desires? She could get Taeko to be more comfortable as herself, and we'd actually get to see glimpses of that deep-seated insecurity she really has. Alternatively, the two of them being manga buddies would really work too.

Anyways, I think Taeko would have a looooooot of work to do to regain everyone's favor, and honestly, I'm fine with her not earning it back outright, instead making it clear she's given up on adaptation but wants to throw herself into escaping and uncovering the mastermind instead. And while there'd definitely be a divide within the cast, I think Makoto would be the one to convince them a truce for the sake of freedom is the best course of action.

Now, the whole Mukuro-corpse shenanigan would def still be happening, but having Taeko Yasuhiro, professional liar, here to identify the similarities between Mukuro's body and "Junko's" would certainly make for an interesting mix-up. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that it could perhaps be Taeko who's now blamed and framed for the murder, and that the class' new apprehension for her working against her would make for a pretty damning verdict, especially when Kyoko is forced to protect herself.

(Taeko surviving the execution being a shining symbol of her gambler's luck would also go so hard if she has a character moment figuring out what's going on and places her bets on Kyoko, but maybe that's just the Celesgiri shipper in me talking who's to say lol)

CH 6

Mostly same, only Makoto and Kyoko work together to rescue Taeko while the others use Kyoko's secret tool to investigate without technically breaking rules. It'd give each character something unique to provide to the final trial, and maybe even a split POV style investigation amongst the entire cast? Hell, if we're going that far, switching into Taeko in chapter 5 could be a strong move as well.

This has honestly gotten. Very rambly. I should've anticipated how much I would have to say about this but oh well lol. I will do the other games Later someone remind me

[nvathuw]

Mondo, panicking : "Dont think about his boypussy- DAMMIT"

he cant resist it

[picnokinesis]

if you would be interested in sharing your thoughts about the star beast, i would love to hear them!!

Ooh okay, so - well, first, just to start off: I think The Star Beast is a really important episode, and was very much a needed episode. The current climate in the UK regarding the trans community and their rights is getting extremely rancid, to put it lightly. Having an episode of Doctor Who with an explicitly trans character, having the other characters around her be affirming and supportive - that was awesome. Extremely awesome. And I'm really glad that RTD is loudly putting himself on this side of the whole 'debate' (which isn't really a debate, because it's just straight up bigotry from the anti-trans side, and we need people like RTD outwardly speaking out against that bigotry).

When I talk to cis people offline about this episode, that is pretty much what I say and also where I stop.

I'll put the rest under the cut hahah - there's a bit of negativity here, just as a warning for all the hardcore RTD stans, but I think it's well-founded and not vitriolic at all, just like, miffed hahaha. Also, I know there were a few trans folks who found this episode really affirming, so just to be clear: this is just my opinion, personal thoughts, and also influenced by the conversations I had with other trans people that I know and care about about the episode.

When I talk to trans people - offline or online - about this episode, I go in a lot deeper, because whilst it was a very important episode, it was somewhat flawed. It also came off the back of several things RTD had said and done that really ticked me off, and so I wasn't really in the interest of being entirely uncritical about what, to me and a lot of trans dw fans that I spoke to, thought was a very "cis" trans story. And when I watched it, I thought 'oh geez, is this how poc feel when white people try and write poc stories with good intentions but don't really get it right??" because like. Ho boy.

The thing about this episode was that RTD wanted to write an affirming trans story, and mostly did that, but also, imo...doesn't actually understand what gender and transness actually is. I think my main gripes were definitely with the climax scene - the whole 'we can let go bc we're women' thing literally made me go 'what' out loud at the screen because...well, it's just gender essentialism. Trans inclusive, sure! But trans inclusive gender essentialism is still gender essentialism. Women aren't better than men. There's actually an exceptionally good essay written by a trans woman who was still in the closet about her experiences in queer spaces that had a very prevalent anti-men attitude, and I've seen it myself irl too. It's not helpful - it's harmful, in fact - and it leans on this strange mysticism about women that is fundamentally anti-feminist, in my opinion. Women aren't "innately better at emotional and intangible, instinctive things" (and it's unspoken counterpart - "thus men are better at logical, rational things" - is also untrue). Women aren't magically better at 'letting things go' than men are - I reckon you could make an argument about men being socialised to not be emotional, and that would be an interesting conversation to have, but that was not what was being said - especially with the Doctor being raised in a society that didn't even perceive gender in the same was as humanity.

Also, the thing that REALLY got me was 'if you were a woman, you'd get it' - first of all, no. Thirteen never let anything go in her life and repressed to the max, if anything she was WORSE than tenteen at that lmao. Second - and this is the more salient point - I think it's a strange thing to suggest that tenteen is fully a man, at this point? Like, regardless of what he looks like, regardless of how he identifies or how thirteen identified, he just lived a lifetime in a body that looked like a woman, and thus was treated as such by the rest of the universe. He wasn't going to forget all of that. I actually really liked how the Chibnall era approached thirteen's gender - or, rather, her complete ambivalence to it, where it seemed like gender was more of an annoying thing that kept happening to the doctor that she kept having to remember, rather than something she felt - however I really REALLY wish they'd actually dug explicitly into the transness of it all, and so when they didn't, I'd hoped that RTD would do that instead. Especially since we KNEW Yasmin Finney was in it and we knew we were going to get a trans character!! I was like, this is the PERFECT opportunity to get the Doctor to actually talk about their gender and how it, fundamentally, doesn't really change between bodies, just how people REACT to it changes. But instead, the episode seems to present the doctor as having flicked a binary switch - once woman, now man - and thus made sure to remind us that every time thirteen was mentioned, it was framed around the fact that she was The Woman Regeneration, but also that tenteen was Now a Man Again. And even if that WAS THE CASE, it still wouldn't mean that tenteen came out of that experience completely mindwiped of everything about 'womanhood', right?? Like he lived as a woman! He was a woman 45 minutes ago, but now you're telling him that he couldn't possibly understand anything about this because he's a man now? Like first of all, his physical body's characteristics have nowt to do with his ability to let things go, second, it's just....okay, it reminds me of the dichotomy between all these detransition horror stories the anti-trans folks like to spew out, versus when you talk to actual detransitioners, who are quite often gnc and extremely positive about the trans community, and whose experience within that community and transitioning impacted how they view the world.

And I think it fundamentally comes down to RTD not really understanding either womanhood or transness. He actively speaks out on both of these things, which is great, but I don't think he understands them fully. I think the fact that he didn't think that David Tennant could wear a t-shirt, braces, trousers and coat because they were "women's clothes", and that when he cast David Tennant that was one of the first things he immediately decided is kind of telling.

There's also the whole 'male-presenting timelord' thing, which, again, I just don't think RTD really understood what that meant, like I'm not sure what his point was there, genuinely. Like, on a technical level it's acknowledging that the Doctor isn't necessarily male, just looks like a man (correct) buuuuuuuuuut the full line was saying 'you'd never understand this because you're a man' SO LIKE...okay? So he's not actually a man, but actually because of his male-adjacency, he's incapable of coming to the same conclusion that a woman did? So he's still...defined by his maleness? Hm. Strange sentence to write coming out of a trans woman's mouth.

What would have been better? I wish they'd just had Donna and Rose say 'because we're human', or maybe 'because we're the Nobles'. I also know a lot of people really didn't like the misgendering scene with the kids on the bikes - I think my personal feelings on that are a little more complicated, as a trans person who is not out irl and functionally uses my birthname almost everywhere, but also isn't triggered by it. It's not a deadname, more like a paperwork name rather than my preferred name, right? But I know for a lot of trans people, deadnaming is like psychological warfare and it's really awful, especially when done with malicious intent (like shown in the scene with the boys on the bikes). However...I do understand why RTD included this scene, and actually kind of agree with him. Because the boys on the bikes are the sort of people who are also watching the show. And so then seeing that kind of thing being condemned by the narrative by a key, beloved character, is probably something that's actually helpful. On the other hand though...in the Doctor Who Unleashed (or whatever the behind the scenes thing is called now), you've got this interview with Yasmin Finney saying that it was actually a pretty triggering scene to film for her and genuinely affected her, and I'm like....okaaaaaay then I REALLY hope they had someone she could talk to on set. Like, fundamentally, I think telling these stories are important, but, yknow, not at the expense of the actual actress' mental wellbeing, right? So that concerned me a bit.

I also think that the scene between Sylvia and Donna in the kitchen talking about Rose was brilliant. And this is because it was about cis people trying to understand and support trans people whilst not completely getting it and making mistakes, but also trying their best!! Which RTD does understand, very well!! And it felt so real. It was fantastic. There's also the part with the whole 'did you assume the meep's pronouns' whiiiiiiiich I have mixed feelings about? I think here, RTD was trying to poke fun at the people who do say that sort of thing to make fun of trans people, and having the Doctor be like 'actually this is a good point we should be checking this sort of thing'......however. I don't think I've ever heard 'did you assume my pronouns' come out of a trans person's mouth. It's always been a cis person mocking our community. So it felt a bit...incongruent. And all that needed to be changed was having Rose say 'how do you know the meep is a he?' - like that was all it needed!!! Also, it was a shame that after the delightful moment of the doctor being like 'SAME HAT' regarding the meep's pronouns, that.....we then had NO OTHER DISCUSSION about the doctor's gender!! Like, Russel, dude, you're really gonna have Rose hear the 'male-presenting' guy say 'oh yeah I do that with pronouns too!! :D' - have her NOT REACT TO THAT AT ALL - and then you're gonna have her say by the end 'oh you don't understand bc you're a man :)' after her non-binary power move moment? Sighs. Yeah.

I think another important thing to remember here is that there were no trans folks in the writer's room on this. Now, this is a tricky one because I think people who aren't part of a certain community should be writing stories outside their own knowledge and experience, and should be encouraged to do so!! I don't think that you need to have everything rubberstamped, and even something written by someone in a certain community isn't going to resonate with everyone in that community. Actually, I think it's unhelpful to start getting into the politics of 'who is allowed to write what' - I think anything written with care and good intention is valuable, especially if the writer is willing to listen to constructive criticism and learn from any mistakes that are made. But I think, as a writer myself, if you are going to write a story about that community, it might be worth 1) talking to them a bit more than I think RTD did - but, to be fair, I don't actually know how much research he did, but, well, see above on the fact I don't think he really got what he was writing about - but also 2) not dismissing writers from that community (and others!), which RTD did in an interview not thaaaaaaat long before the episode aired. Again, to be fair to him, he has since then been like 'oh, we need to mentor and encourage the new generation of trans writers and writers of colour', which, great! But also, sir, then why were you saying that all the scripts you got from minority writers were all awful, angry, and lacked any love for tv like skksks SIR. SIR. The thing that gets me about that comment in particular is that, as someone currently starting out in script writing, I know exactly how hard it is to get at all noticed. It takes a lot of effort, a lot of passion, a lot of hard work and a lot of skill - and a lot of luck too, granted, but not luck along. So, RTD, if these writers got their scripts to your literal desk, as showrunner of Doctor Who...I think they have some love and passion. They HAVE to, to get to the point where he is reading those scripts. Also maybe RTD should unpack the fact that he thought the scripts were bad because they were too angry - I mean, I haven't read them, so I don't know, but maybe, sir, feeling uncomfortable about the anger in a script isn't a bad thing. Not every story is meant to be an easy pill to swallow. There are aromantic stories I want to write about romance as horror, romance as a virus, romance as a destructive force, that I think a lot of alloromantic people will find uncomfortable. Does that mean they're bad? Maybe, lol. Mostly they're bad because they're not written yet lmao, but I don't think the anger and discomfort in them makes them inherently weak. In fact, I think often anger can make a story stronger.

So then, I think The Star Beast left a sour taste in the back of my mouth, despite all the positive aspects of it, because of that. I think that comment also kinda left me frustrated about Dot and Bubble, even though I think that was a fantastic episode and genuinely really well done, and very effective - and I'm genuinely loathe to criticise it at all because I think it was so important - but. Having RTD talking in an interview about wondering how long the audience will take to notice that the cast is all white (and, thus, the depicted society is racist) whilst sitting in a writers room that's all white iiiiiiiiiiis uh. I don't think he thought about that SKKS. I think a lot about Sacha Dhawan talking about how you can be as inclusive on screen as you like, but if it's all 'white behind the lights' then how much does that inclusivity actually mean?

RTD definitely had good intentions and wrote a mostly good story. But he definitely fell down in some regards, aaaaaand well. I don't know. My personal opinion is that he's kind of arrogant and thinks he's infallible as a writer (and I may feel this way bc of the way parts of the fandom seem to put him on a pedestal, if I'm honest) - but I think that he's just human. He doesn't get things perfectly right all the time, and that's absolutely fine, but I think it's interesting and important to discuss those pitfalls, and I just wish he'd stop making it feel like he thinks he can write trans stories better than, yknow, actual trans people, and then write the most cis trans story I've ever seen SKSKSKSK

(AND ACTUALLY - sorry, this is getting long, but it's kind of indicative of the whole industry at the moment? The industry is calling for more diverse voices, more diverse stories - but they also want stories that can appeal to the widest possible audience, the common denominator, and thus "trans stories by trans people for trans people" doesn't actually tick that box. This didn't hit me until I wrote a trans horror script that got shortlisted for a script call, but when I spoke to the (cis) producer and director (who were LOVELY, the producer had a gorgeous dog called Biscuit HAHA) I very quickly realised that they did not get it. They didn't understand. "Why do we have to kill the mirror demon that's the girl part of this trans man?" they asked. "She should get to live too!" But: "She was never a part of him," I had to say. "She was the idea of him that everyone around him thought he was, and thought it so strongly that she became real. It was her or him." They didn't really understand, but on the plus side it did highlight to me what was unclear in my script that none of my (trans) proof readers had picked up on (although my transfemme friend made the HILARIOUS comment that maybe the mirror demon could go and find a nice trans girl to possess? WHICH SKSKSKSKKSKSK I MEAN -))

Anyway. -gestures nebulously- I feel like my thoughts were a lot more concise and well constructed in the week after this episode actually aired hahaha, but I didn't want to throw my hat into the ring back then. I did find it amused how the majority of my cis trans-affirming friends were like 'GREAT EPISODE, RIGHT?!!' and the majority of my trans friends were sending me the grimace emoji in the week after the episode aired LMAO

[morangoowada]

I don't see other people having this hc very often but I actually hc Aoi as Transfem