#touched for the very first time
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Happy Valentine's Day
Okay so I'm only halfway into Valentine's Day 2024 and I have a whole story in three parts. To be fair, none of my Valentine's Days have ever been very impactful (spent the last one nonstop listening to a new Brooke Candy song, stream juicy fruit everyone) so this one being the one where I'm feeling the single bitch energy kinda makes sense since I'm an adult now.
ANYWAY, this tale of dork virginness begins two days ago where my crush is ignoring me after two days of talking to me for hours like he loved me or something (please make up your mind, I can't even say that because I can't make up my mind ever either but pls) and in the midst of this ignoring and absolute lack of harmony with him that's gutted me to the core, he talks about how much he hates the gay dating scene.
…and I was like BITCH UR TRYING TO DATE WHEN I'M RIGHT HERE?? What the hell, this possible relationship just got an expiration date
So I was so irritated that I fizzled out whatever embarrassing "conversation" I had with him where he's giving me four-word responses every ten minutes in between talking to other dudes, and because I'm a sad bitch about it, I logged onto an Omegle knockoff at 5 in the morning and skipped through hundreds of straight guys who were horny and looking for women (bitch look elsewhere, women aren't looking for love on """emerald chat omegle alternative""" okay, i promise u), and I ended up paired with an allegedly straight guy who I basically dirty talked with about my butt until he came lmao… bless.
So that's part 1. Part 2 is me being so pissed off about something(?), oh yeah, I stubbed my toe SO HARD on a random chair on my way back to bed after the shower and plugged my phone charger in so hard that it broke. Didn't even feel bad, it was doing that thing where you have to hold it at a certain angle anyway.
THIS MORNING: the clothes I put in the dryer literally got BURNED IN THE DRYER (????) so I had to go to college in clothes that smelled like a literal dumpster fire and pretend like nobody noticed. Let alone the fact that I slept through my alarm AAAAGAAAAIN and my mom bustled into my room like "aren't u supposed to be up????"
Went to college this morning, sped so much on the highway and SOMEHOW made it in time, totally forgot how I'm the only single person in my group. Literally one is engaged, one is married with a CHILD, and the other one came decked out in the cutest Valentine's outfit I've ever seen (also not single tho keodjownwdoek) and I like being single!! I dooooo, I just hate these dumbass boys being weird and not loving me, I'm so lovable tf
Anyway, I finally look at my messages as I'm leaving and who do I see but none other than mr. "I'm coming to destroy that butt" who my romantic opinions on are very mixed. Been talking to him while Mister worldwide ghosts me some more 🙄🙄🙄
#single on Valentine's Day#single bitch#like a virgin#touched for the very first time#i was SO close to putting that song on my instagram notes#didn't want people to think i'm being an incel tho lol#like it's funnyyyyyy#it's also madonna#like what incel listens to madonna lmao#going 2 play roblox instead of doing my assignments 🥳
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Reverse verse silliness because angst is endless but so is wonder
@i-am-as-normal-as-you-are commissioned this one, and if you think this is silly, wait until you see what we have prepared for Christmas
#dbda#dead boy detectives#reverse verse#i want you all to know#that rv!charles is wearing rv!crystal's sunglasses#she would normally not let anyone touch them#but it was a special occasion#also is edwin annoyed because of the stupid game#or because charles lost and he's a competitive boy?#rv!edwin looks so dead inside just as we planned#first time doing one of these draw your squad thingies#it was very fun!
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been a long week. we'll see if i overstepped at work and am gonna get myself shitmixed/scolded but in the very least, my girls at work should have a better foothold on things
#warmup#being the only female floor manager at my workplace is. difficult#its very much a “boys club” situation#so needless to say: playing 6D chess for over a week trying to solve underlying issues while also not stepping on toes is#hard... this is the first time ive touched my tablet in the full 8 days aough#time to get back to updates and commissions!!! 💪💪💪
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sorry i'm late i was busy with the existential crisis of it all
anyway, have something that gave me so much trouble but i think it turned out kinda well
also, this and the rest of this series are available on my Inprnt!!
1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6
#my art#artists on tumblr#art#httyd#how to train your dragon#how to train your dragon fanart#httyd fanart#tried very hard to make it look magicalish#was really inspired by that one concept art of hiccup touching toothless for the first time#but with a little bit of emphasis that the crux of their relationship isn't ownership or physical contact#but you still get toothless kinda peaking out from the shadows#and also there are some stars in toothless's shadow#bc that's a motif i definitely won't ever bring back no siree
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I’m with you, my love The lights shining through on you Yes, I’m with you, my love It’s the morning and just we two
#spike btvs#spuffy#spuffyedit#btvs#btvsedit#buffy the vampire slayer#it's terribly simple#you know you want to dance#injuries cw#bites and chews and gnaws on anyone who says buffy didnt love spike. BITES and CHEWS and GNAWS on them.#like is that not the whole point? of him? of his entire character arc? of his burning to ash as he breaks the sunnydale high school#(AKA buffy's personal cage within the slayer's cage that was sunnydale itself AKA the place where he and buffy first ever fought#and he nearly killed her for the very first time but was foiled by the immense love someone felt for her) as he breaks that place to rubble#in a way also very reminiscent of the first time they slept together and Literally Fucked A Building Down. anyway as he's doing ALL OF THAT#like sure she doesnt HAVE to love him she doesnt owe him anything and even if she did love isnt about obligation. but when buffy says#that she loves him in that scene. theres nothing to indicate that she doesnt feel it. that she isnt telling the truth.#idk man. people take a man who is dying telling someone not to love him as the gospel truth when i feel like its more ... like maybe he's#making a misguided effort to be kind? he's telling her ''dont get too hung up on the vampire thats about to catch on fire#and get your pretty ass out of here while you still can please.''#whatever. WHATEVER. in the perfect btvs that lives in my head most of ats isnt canon but esp the part where spike comes back and doesnt#immediately 1. ASK IF DAWN WAS OKAY 2. upon being told by angel that he cant be put in touch with buffy because [mumbles] misogyny?#go ahead and engage in a flirt campaign at harmony until she breaks down and calls buffy for him. those would be like the FIRST TWO THINGS#that spike did after he came back to unlife. first two things frfr#i'm gonna end the tag rant there. hmm
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faint idea dump. alternative universe where both wukong and the destined one exist at the same time.
since destined one doesn't talk nearly as much, modern!reader during their journey to do something decided to start teaching him sign language to communicate if he doesn't feel like talking, and wukong doesn't enjoy it too much because it gives reader a reason to touch the destined one a lot
#reader has hearing loss after birth and uses a hearing aid that somehow survived during the universe jump#wukong seems like he doesn't like the idea of sign language and even ridicules it a little given that everyone present can actually talk#but actually pays close attention to the lessons and once when a monster made the hearing aid fall out#and it broke and reader can't hear very clearly thus causing major anxiety#wukong pulls them aside and started to sign choppy sentences to them to calm them down. reader laughs and fixes his signs.#first time their hands ever touched#.idea dump#black myth wukong#sun wukong x reader
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@hereticcryptid I appear to be slowly but surely developing an entire series about how Hensheng and Baxia apparently get fed up with their owners' inability to express their feelings and take matters into their own hands...
#mdzs#jin guangyao#nie mingjue#jgy#nmj#nieyao#very sincerely this is a concept i keep coming back to and spinning around in my head#i find it unreasonably funny i want these swords revealing every tender feeling that these two are categorically incapable of admitting to#really i just want to bring the concept of e'ming and the general embarrassment hua cheng feels for his sabre at all times and throw it#into the mdzs world#can't quite bully the concept into an actual fic but i do love thinking about it and drawing art related to it#i assume nmj nearly went completely feral the first time hensheng shot out at him#like yup! he knew jgy was a snake! he's trying to attack him while his guard is down!!! well nmj is gonna deflect this fucking weak attack#and then SKEWER jgy and there's no way lxc can hold it against him!#except rather than deflecting hensheng baxia is a horrible traitor about it and instead he ends up getting cuddled by a touch-starved sword#0/10 nmj is having a horrible day he would genuinely have prefered jgy try to kill him (jgy would have ALSO prefered that as it happens)#(nhs on the other hand is having an AMAZING day when he sees it)#my art#THANK YOU EVERYONE THAT SENT ME PROMPTS!#this seriously helped get me through the day and made my evening so much better#i shall continue to go through them tomorrow after work as well 🥰🥰🥰#hensheng
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There was this one art a little while ago about the family stuck in a situation where they're forced to play ISAT in some post game scenerio. I keep having many thoughts, but here's some about them figuring out who Loop is:
1) They all BAFFLED by how Loop usually talks. They all thought Loop was this shy little star person. Immediately, they get hit with "have you tried not dying~~~~" into "I think you deserve help" and do not know what to think.
2) Odile is in charge of the controller. Mainly bc no one else wants to control Siffrin and they all have equal amount of video game experience aka none, so Odile is being practical about it. This has the side effect that Odile gets to be all investigative. Odile makes it her MISSION to find stuff out about Loop.
3) Siffrin has complicated feelings about them finding out about Loop??? Like okay they HATE their family has to see all this, ESPECIALLY THAT THEY CAN SEE HIS THOUGHTS!!!! But. Loop. Siffrin hasn't told his family the truth. It's not his story to tell. But. If they figure it out...? In a way that proves Loop wrong, right? That they can recognize them. Maybe it takes a bit because Loop looks different is and actively trying to be different from Siffrin. But. Maybe...? Either way they encourage Odile to talk to Loop. If this is a simulation... if this is real in some way even... yeah he wants to talk to Loop.
Anyway here's a list on how they find out one by one:
Odile: She catches the little stuff. She notes the royal We, the fact that Loop alludes to having an old body by accident, the casual familiarity in some places. All of that. She is also the first to note their eyes being different shades. However, Odile doesn't make the connection 100%, not until Isabeau. Well.
Isabeau: He gets some of the weird stuff Loop says but not as many as Odile. HE finds Loops side comments weirder. He sees Loop's reactions and they're a bit. Uncanny.... and then he has another realization, Loop and Siffrin have the same eyes. When Isabeau notes this, it all clicks for Odile.
Mirabelle: Okay, so. You cannot tell me that Mirabelle has not read fantasy stories with weird guide characters. She has to have!!!! So at first, she's not even looking for who Loop is. And tbh? She has the best read on Loop's personality otherwise. Sassy, but clearly caring. A bit of a shit, but serious when needed. And mainly, she appreciates Loop Being There when the rest of them couldn't. That being said, the moment where the "have you wondered who I am" happens. And suddenly Mirabelle Is Thinking Of the Possibilties. And then the ME option pops up!!!! Odile was already about to pick it but Mirabelle YELLS to pick that one!!!!! Uh. Shortly after that they all have a conversation about how yeah, Loop is VERY likely Siffrin. Mirabelle justifies herself with tropes. Of course!!! Of course they're Siffrin!!! If they're anyone they have to be Siffrin. Siffrin got transformed and became the guide they needed!!!! It Just Makes Sense.
Bonnie: ....Tbh doesn't really figure it out on their own? But also. Loop. Feels like Frin. Not exactly like Frin. But they're Frin enough to be trusted so who cares. It takes awhile for them to really get it too because... it's weird. Also they're the one to really ask why there would be two Frins??? Duh??? And why would Frin become Loop???
Anyway, basically, after picking "Me?" They pretty much are all on the same page. They got that it was wishcraft. They got Loop is Siffrin somehow. I think Odile might figure out that "hey, uh if Loop is the guide then what happens when Loop doesn't have a guide" and Mirabelle probably says "wait Siffrin didn't you say to me once that without Loop you wouldn't have made it?"
Meanwhile Siffrin is a mix of sad and very emotionally touched. Because. Yeah. Even when trying to actively hide, their family recognized them.
Notably, Siffrin gets them to twohats (Siffrin remembers that they understood Loop most after showing them the coin. So yes, the family does get to see Siffrin's "I will forget everything I love" moment. Goes as well as you expect. Lots of hugs and the reassurance that they will bug Siffrin until the end of their days so he can't forget him so HA!)
But yeah. Siffrin really wants to make sure they can get little simulation Siffrin to realize Loop is Siffrin as well. Because if there is any chance of this being real and that they're guiding a Siffrin in another reality, then they want to make sure they can get Loop to know just how much they did. How much they helped and changed Siffrin's fate for the better.
To note: I'd imagine in this scenario, Odile wouldn't go do any of the side stuff. At least not too much of it. There wouldn't be as much exploration either. Siffrin likely would be very underleveled as a result.
So perhaps in this scenario? Imagine if you will that while the Siffrin watching definitely defeated Loop, the simulation Siffrin loses.
And Siffrin finds out that... no. No! Of course Loop couldn't kill him. Of course they wouldn't. There is a catharsis to that realization.
(After they finish the game, either a) prologue playthrough time or b) they're freed and the group IMMEDIATELY try to figure out a way to find Loop bc uh??? Even if they weren't Siffrin, they want to find them. But like. Two Frins. Two Frins they know are different but who cares, no matter who Loop chooses to be, Loop Is Family Too).
Anyway, family plays isat featuring the Loop Saga.
#isat#isat spoilers#loop isat#the family plays isat au#may talk more about it or write it one day but I REALLY wanted to put those thoughts down#this post doesnt even get into Siffrin reactions to seeing all their thoughts laid out for everyone to see#or the concept of everyone kinda hyped to see 'siffrin vision'#and mirabelle being touched that the first thing siffrin did when finding out he may be in a time loop was to try to make her happy#just in general: all the adults get very charmed by siffrin interacting with the world in act 1/2#also possible catharsis of the family being able to see how it 'should' have gone#anyway I have many thoughts but Ill end them there for now
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Who had the worst time aboard the TARDIS?
TOURNAMENT MASTERPOST
#genuinely vote peri#i've not seen all of her stories but my god from what i've seen the 80s writers hated her#there are some stories where she'd probably be better off dead#she seems to be in a constant living torturous hell with 6 being constantly nasty too her#this poor woman#okay specific example#her first trip after her introduction (recounted from memory so some details my be wrong)#she and the doctor unknowingly touch a poisonous plant which will kill them slowly and painfully (but fast enough she almost dies by the en#so great they need to find a cure#which is horrendously difficult to find in the best of circumstances#but these aren't the best of circumstances#they get taken hostage pretty quickly and very nearly get executed by firing squad#they get rescued by one of the most unnerving villains i think in the entire show#he creeps on peri constantly#like he gets as close to assaulting her as its possible to depict on tea time telly#and peri can't do anything about it#her life is entirely in this guys hands#like most of the time i find caves of androzani the be so hyperviolent as to be funny#but jesus christ the shit they put peri through in it#anyway by the end she's so ill the doctor has to drag her near lifeless body back to the tardis#gives her the cure and then promptly regenerates#and now peri's nice friendly doctor is uhh tv 6#bad times: quarters
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Mel/Viktor as in "he loved her to the point of invention"
#melvik#mel medarda#mel arcane#viktor#viktor arcane#arcane#aaaauuuugggghhhhhhhhhh no thoughts head empty#viktor who doesn't waste time or effort quietly making something trivial for her and just for her and she has no idea#or something very much not trivial#either them at the academy in a world where they banter and argue for the fun of it and one day viktor finds himself carving out#an hour here and there to build her something with his own hands#or the machine herald who tells himself their relationship is out of necessity and is strictly business and why would he do anything#for a piltie anyway. but then he designs something - SOMETHING - for her just with her in mind and it's too late she's in his head rent fre#and now she's in his handiwork too#then she touches whatever he's made for the first time and smirks at him about it and he's like Oh This Was A Mistake#that doesn't stop him from doing it again though
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most offputting twink youve ever seen in your life
#orikan the diviner#the infinite and the divine#i am once again inflicting chromatic abhorrations upon you all#he laughs like a crow and would refuse to spit in someones face because they dont deserve to touch him even in that way#he. looks very dramatic.#..yknow. ive kinda dealt with being told to draw nicer things and cuter things my whole life and. always struggled with it#very recently have been trying to draw more freak shit and. i am realising just how much that criticism has held me back#im fucking terrified [see i showed my partner this first and when given the stamp of approval i just said 'really' in shock like four times#but. im enjoying it more. i want to do more freak shit like this#anyway. the divinerrrrrrrr
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i am once again thinking of post-canon touch-starved binghe always needing to hold/touch/feel in some way shape or form sqq's body, doesnt matter what part, its all the same, as long as he can feel that shizun is alive alive alive and here with him, and even if he cant touch him with his own hands, his blood is the life in shizun's veins, keeping time and brushing against the front of his mind with relief that he can still feel him deep inside
but oh, when shizun reaches out first, the universe crumples to a fixed point where they connect, and nothing now can shake him, except the way that his shizun loves him, loves him, loves HIM!!
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#listen i just got really emotional thinking about how much time binghe spent hugging a corpse as the only way he could be close to sqq#the way touch is something withheld and yet given so freely when its the two of them#lbh taking whatever he can get bc the world has shown him that it wont be given freely#sqq: [passing his cup while cracking his knuckles] hold my fucking tea [PATPATPATPATPATPATPAT-]#me holding up touch starved binghe to a furious sqq who will tear me to shreds for daring to touch his bingbaby: i just think theyre neat#i think it just also says a lot in a very small way about how much binghe has learned to live without and why he breaks down so often#binghe is just so 'image of big feline receiving kindness for the first time' coded to me
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thinking about this on my most recent rewatch
(gif source: ferndaphnia)
It can be kinda easy to get exasperated with Aziraphale sometimes for how much he’s struggling with what seem to us like really obvious moral non-dilemmas. How slowly and arduously he comes to the conclusion that Elspeth and other resurrectionists are meeting a need that polite society’s nonsensical arbitrary rules don’t yet have an answer for.
But this shot, this scene, just underlines to me how genuine and earnest his struggle is. He’s not being squeamish about graverobbing, like it offends his delicate sensibilities. He’s slowly unlearning some bullshit, and he comes by it honestly and is doing his best. He’s just learned that the contents of the glass jar in his hands are a tumor that was surgically removed from a 7 year old boy, who did not survive the ordeal. Look at his body language, look at his face (so much sorrow between those mutton chops!). If he were just squeamish, he would, idk, push the jar away from him, set it down, grimace. Not cradle it closer to his chest, as if it were the 7 year old boy he wishes he could comfort, as sadness and understanding washes over him.
#idk I had a very Big emotional and spiritual reaction the first time I touched a tumor in a medical setting maybe I’m projecting a bit#i am aziraphale a little bit sometimes#a lot sometimes#good omens#good omens meta#good omens season 2#the resurrectionists
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So, uh. Could we assume that the "what if we were young lords, in an aristocratic imperial society with stifling social norms, and one of us wanted to run away together but the other was afraid of losing his inherited wealth" thing is relevant. And also perhaps read some of those reactions as "babe, is our breakup argument still the first thing on your mind?" / [can't roleplay without revealing that he knows too much about how the real argument went] / "babe, are you roleplaying me???"
#unless of course he's roleplaying himself and that's what his current persona has been striving away from ever since#/that's why he's so weirdly apologetic in those first nuwho master eps#screencaps cant capture the way rogues eyes are flicking analytically across the doctors face#(in a very not 'oh no have i touched a nerve for my new crush :(' way)#or his look of amusement and blurry almost-shrug as he jumps up to chase after him#doctor who#the end of time#rogue
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It's finished. My 111 hours long lovesong dedicated to Jusant ~💕
#conscydraws#Jusant#jusant fanart#This game became very special for me#There's so much love and warmth that i constantly felt like under the warmest of blankets when I was playing it#it's especially amazing that they managed to provide such vibe despite the world around dying#Or it may seem so at first. We see relics of the past and messages left by the former inhabitants. But flora and fauna keeps on living.#i've felt similar emotions playing hld and also having my own journeys through the wilderness.#It feels personal#It feels like you're getting in touch with your inner self while also experiencing the in-game world and characters' stories.#I'm very thankful that i had such experience. That this game gave me that.#I had to depict some of my feelings and my all-consuming love to the blue bean 🤲#spending a solid 111 hours on this painting.#I don’t regret that in the slightest cause this time it was similar to a blissful meditation#in the end founding a way to enhance this painting and achieve the quality I was aiming to#I had to scrap the blue beans at the top part of the image#But I guess I will paint them separately some other day#indie games#artists on tumblr#illustration#digital art#digital illustration#digital painting
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presenting.. Alastor! hells latest up and comer! now broadcasting live for your entertainment!
#Alastor#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#Alastor fanart#fanart#in the shots we saw if alastors radio station I thought it looked very empty and impersonal#there was lots of dials and equipment and tech but it didn’t resemble the kid of personal touches we saw in his room at the hotel#obviously he was missing for 7 years so maybe thats why#plus after a century of being the radio demon there must have been a lot of changes over time#so I wonder what it might have looked like when he was first getting started?
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