#took the anyone who sees this and wants to share to heart and tagging myself ig

[short666bread]

Haha. I posted fic. don’t read it.

[cupcakeslushie]

I’ve been debating on saying something because I have a lot of thoughts about this, but I just want to say a quick (maybe not so quick) thought…

“Comfort Character” is not a declaration of ownership. Just because you relate to a character deeply, and see yourself in them, does not mean you get to go around policing the stories that get told regarding them, or the how they’re depicted in said stories.

I wanna be clear. Im not saying you can’t pose genuine questions and have perfectly reasonable discussions about the intricacies of hard topics. In fact, fiction can even help make those discussions easier to digest by lowering the stakes, because there are not any actual stakes when none of it is real.

Unfortunately, I’ve been seeing the entire opposite. People taking stories that may make them “uncomfy”, and declaring that they’ve now decided they are taking it personally, to near obsessive levels. You are not the only one allowed to play with these characters. It is a huge sandbox, and these toys are mass produced enough for everyone to have their own doll to do with whatever they’d like.

I get you might see yourself in a character, but that doesn’t give you the right to go around sending death threats just because someone wrote, or drew your current blorbo in an unfavorable light. Prioritizing some cluster of lines and colors over the mental health and safety of actual real human beings, is worse than whatever fictional, moral “atrocity” that you think you’re championing against. You only end up sounding just like the people calling for book banning in schools.

You are not the character. You are not being hurt. The character is not even being hurt, because they do not in fact, exist to actually experience any of the pain creators are putting them through. And most importantly, you have no claim on how other people entertain themselves with said character. Because that is what these characters are. Entertainment. They can be used in good or bad stories. If you don’t like how a creator is using them. Move on. Don’t send death threats or attacks.

Block and filter your tags.

I have triggers, but that is my issue to control and maintain. It is appreciated when steps are taken by creators to help me avoid the things that trigger me, but I don’t wish death and pain on anyone who doesn’t view the world through the same lens as myself, and might not have considered my own personal feelings on the matter. My feelings of unease or anxiety from coming into contact with my own triggers, might be valid, but initiating an attack on a creator, because I took a personal offense to their story, is not. I do not outright assume that something was created with me and my tastes in mind.

Also, this is not aimed at any one person. This is a rampant issue that I have seen first hand, going back all the way to more than a year ago. I’ve seen it happen in multiple fandoms, but as I spend most of my time in the Rise fandom, that’s where I see the worst of it. I’ve received attacks, I know other creators have received attacks, and if this keeps up, creators will just stop wanting to share anything at all.

I also need to emphasize, I’m not mad. This is not a lashing out. This is just a frustrating and hurtful trend to constantly witness, when creators are putting their own heart, time, and energy into creating intriguing and complex works of all kinds in order to broaden the beauty of this fandom, and they’re getting anonymous messages to kill themselves.

Please think about the real life person behind the art and stories you are consuming, instead of prioritizing the fictional comfort of made up characters inside the story, that will in actuality, never have any opinions on what’s being done to them. Because they do not exist.

[playstation-dreamcast]

This came to me in a dream. Anyway:

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Choose Your Character: Albert Wesker

Summary: For the sake of the mission, Albert Wesker is willing to do just about anything within reason to gain the trust of his S.T.A.R.S members. Apparently, building a snowman with his favorite new rookie is within reason.

Tags: Fluff, S.T.A.R.S Wesker, Nicotine use, Crack treated so serious none of my beta readers thought it was crack, Noncanon compliant RPD, Gender Neutral Reader.

Word count: 3k

It all started with that stupid fucking snowman.

A childish game he played to indulge his subordinate and gain their trust late one night after the S.T.A.R.S office had closed. He knew better even then, that it was an absolute waste of time. But, he complied, because it was you who asked.

Okay, maybe it didn't start with The Snowman. Maybe it started with the cigarette you shared. Sitting on the snow covered sidewalk, passing the smoke between the two of you while you talked. It came so easy to him, just talking with you. It was never that easy with anyone else.

He could still smell the smoke when he closed his eyes. He could see the snow caught in your lashes, and the fog of your breath. He could still feel how tight his chest got, and the roller coaster feeling of his stomach dropping when he finally had to admit to himself that he was sweet on you. And that he couldn’t keep lying to himself about it.

And you had no idea. You smiled like it was any other night. 

"Hey, can I bum a cigarette off you?" You asked him that at least twice a week since you started working as a member of S.T.A.R.S. It got to the point that he started to plan for it. Sadly, he was late to work this morning and didn't have time to buy another pack.

"Sure," he said, simply handing you the one he had just lit. You took it gratefully and smiled.

"Thanks Captain, you save me once again," you teased as you sat down next to him, taking a drag off the smoke. "You gonna light one?"

"That was my last one," he confessed with a shrug; chin resting in his hand, elbow resting on his knee. He thought about leaving, it wasn’t like he had anything left to do here. But he stayed anyway. He’d regret it later.

"What? Then why'd you give it to me dude?"  you scoffed.

He looked at you out of the corners of narrowed eyes. "Don't call me 'dude,'" he, half-heartedly at best, reprimanded as you rolled your eyes, "and because you asked for it. As your captain it's my job to take care of you." He didn't mean for it to come out like that, but he wasn't going to backtrack now and make it weird.

"Ah yes, taking care of me by giving me cancer. Truly, so selfless of you." You giggled as you handed him the smoke. 

He took it without thinking, easily taking a puff off it. "If I was worried about that, I'd have to fight a losing war with half the team- myself included." He took another drag to prove his point, "I like to think I pick my battles more wisely than that."

You hummed as you nodded, taking the cigarette back and putting it to your lips. You huddled closer to your captain, watching the snow fall and seeking his warmth in the cold. "It's pretty out." You smiled.

"It's nothing we don't see every winter." He took the smoke back.

You playfully pushed him, "Oh sorry Oscar didn't realize you fell out of your can."

"I have literally no idea what you're talking about."

"I'm calling you a grouch, Wesker." He nodded in acknowledgement of your clarification, and didn't try to argue. Just took a particularly long drag and handed the cigarette back to you. 

You took your turn with it and continued. "You gotta be able to still see the beauty in the small things, and the wonder in the world. Or else you just become old and bitter, and nobody wants that." He didn't have the heart to tell you he was already there. 

The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, watching as new snow covered the old. It had become a ritual between the two of you – one Wesker had grown quite fond of. Every night when the two of you closed the S.T.A.R.S office together, you took the time to share a smoke break before going your separate ways for the night.

Wekser looked forward to them more than he cared to admit. At first it was just another thing he did to ensure all members of S.T.A.R.S trusted him. Fifteen minutes at the end of a shift was a small price to pay for the confidence of his team, and as long as they had confidence in him they wouldn’t doubt him. 

He wasn’t quite sure when he started looking forward to your quiet conversations, just like he wasn’t really sure when he started buying two packs of cigarettes to accommodate them. Or how he wasn’t sure when he started looking for little excuses throughout the day to touch you, to talk to you, to have your attention. At some point you had wormed your way into his mind and made your home there. He would have resented you for it if he could find it in him to do so.

He almost jumped when you finally broke the silence. "You know, when I was a kid, my dad would always let me stay home for the first snow of the season- didn't matter if school was canceled or not."

Wekser took the cigarette from your hand. "Sounds like irresponsible parenting to me, keeping a child from their education." He finally killed the smoke, flicking it off into the abyss.

"Maybe!" you admitted, "but, those days were important to me. We'd always go out and make a giant snowman – as big as we could – and try to keep him alive for the season." You smiled at your warm childhood memories. "It was fun."

"I've never built a snowman before." Wesker confessed. He wasn't sure why he did, it's not like you were asking. It just fell out of him. You had a way of pulling things out of him without even trying, something he should have been more wary about than he was- all things considered. 

You looked at him shocked. "What?! No way! Not even when you were a little kid?"

He looked back at you and shook his head, "The boys home where I grew up had no time for such frivolous things. As long as the power was on, we were in school. And on the rare occasions it was knocked out, well. We had other priorities." It felt so natural, being so open with you. Maybe it was because you were always so open with him. Or maybe you were one of the few people that treated him like a person with vulnerabilities. It used to scare him, on some deeper level. It still did in a lot of ways.

Lately though, he's just grateful to have someone other than Birkin to talk to. "Captain, that's one of the saddest things I've ever heard. That's like, a super villain's backstory."

He finally turned his head to you. "What? Not being able to build a snowman?" He scoffed. You were blowing this out of proportion.

"Being a child and not being allowed to play," you clarified. Oh. He had never thought of it that way. It's not that you were wrong, he wasn’t allowed to play as a child – not really. It's just… he never really took the time to think about his childhood. He didn't like the feeling it gave him.

So he shrugged again, brushing off the memories before they had a chance to linger. "The past is the past. There's no use dwelling on it."

"Fuck that, come on!" You grabbed his hand and pulled him off the steps. He didn't even have time to fully comprehend just what was happening before you pulled him to the patch of grass the RPD called a lawn. "We're building a snowman.”

He huffed out a sorry excuse for a laugh and rolled his eyes. “You can’t be serious Rookie,” He said as he watched you gather the starting snowball.

“As serious as a heart attack, Captain,” you said, handing him the growing ball, “And I’m not a rookie anymore, I’ve been with S.T.A.R.S for six months now!”

He fought a small smile back at your insistence that you were – in fact – a highly trained soldier after a mere six months. “That’s still rookie status, dear.” The pet name came out so easily he hardly registered it, but you clearly did. He could tell by how you froze, your eyes widening ever so slightly. He needed a distraction. He held up the snowball, “And what do you want me to do with this?”

You relaxed as you remembered the task at hand. “Roll it around in the snow, I’m working on the base, so you work on the middle.” 

He made no move to hide his annoyance. “This is ridiculous, I want you to know this.”

“Then go home,” you shrugged. “No one’s keeping you here by force, no ones putting a gun to your head. If you don’t wanna help, you're free to go.” You acted so unbothered when you said it, focusing on growing the snowman's base. It hit a nerve in his heart he didn’t even know he had. You made it so blatantly clear that you didn’t need him there. Suddenly, the only thing he could think about was proving to you that you did need him there. 

He started wordlessly working on the middle of the snowman, trying to focus on the smile on your face and not on how ridiculous he surely looked. “That should be good,” you said, pointing to the ball he was working on. “Go ahead and put it on the base.” 

He took a second to look at the base you’d made, and the progress he made on the middle part, then got right back to adding snow. “No.”

“No, what do you mean no?” you scoffed, trying to sound offended but failing to hide your giggle.

He easily hid his smile. “It’s still too small. It would look awkward on the base, and even more so once we add the head. It needs more snow.”

“Weren’t you the one calling this all a waste of time?” you teased as you started the head.

Without missing a beat he looked at you, “It is. I stand by that. But if you’re going to do something, you might as well do it right.” Finally, he was satisfied with the ball of snow he’d been put in charge of, and carefully placed it on the base. 

You giggled softly, “That’s such a dad thing to say.”

“It’s just how things should be done.” He shrugged, “If it’s worth doing, it’s worth putting the effort into doing it right.”

“So you admit this is worth doing?”

“What? I didn’t say that.”

“But ya kinda did,” you pointed out. “If it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right. And you’re trying to build this snowman right, so therefore – it’s worth doing.”

Wesker took the time to think of his next words carefully. He couldn’t just say outright it was worth doing because it made you happy. Because these small moments of connection built a trust between you. One he would inevitably betray one day. 

There was that horrible tight feeling in his chest again. The one he only got when he thought about how he would have to hurt you in the future. He pressed forward, “Somethings, as frivolous as they are, can be worth doing for the greater impact they have.” You nodded sagely at his words, as if you understood perfectly. Which, was genuinely shocking because even he wasn’t entirely sure what the fuck he just said. 

Finally, you put the head on the snowman. “Well! What do you think?” You smiled, making passionate jazz hands at the snowy creation the two of you had made.

He cocked his head to the side. “Something’s missing.”

You nodded. “Yeah, we’re missing a face.”

“What do you normally use for a face?”

You shrugged, “Traditionally, kids used coal and a carrot for the face. Sticks for the arms, maybe a scarf, you get it. You’ve seen Frosty the Snowman.”

He hadn’t, but that was a battle for a different day. “Seems like a waste of a carrot. And we don’t have any coal.”

You nodded again. “Yeah, sadly. Guess our little guy will just have to remain faceless.”

No, that wasn’t good enough. Not for Wesker. If he was going to make anything, it was going to be perfect. He’d accept nothing less. He quickly looked around, searching for a suitable substitute for coal. He quickly spotted what the RPD once called a garden that was now mostly filled with snow covered rocks and made his way there. You picked up on his thought process and went to go pull sticks off of a nearby tree for the arms. 

“Hey, I found a pine cone!” You called to him as you returned.

“Excellent, we’ll use it for the nose.” He replied as you reconvened at the snowman. The two of you argued briefly about the facial expression – you insisting the snowman should be happy and him arguing it should be miserable because who wouldn’t be miserable stuck out in the snow? You countered with a snowman wouldn’t, because he’s literally made of snow and probably can’t feel cold. You won the argument. This time. 

You assembled the final touches together, then stepped back to look at your handiwork. He smiled smugly, placing his hand on your lower back to hold you closer. “Not bad for a rookie.” He said, looking at you.

You smiled back at him. “Not at all,” you said as you rested your head on his shoulder. It was the closest the two of you had ever been to each other at that point. And the closest Wesker had been to anyone in a long time. It should have felt wrong, the way it tended to when he made contact with others. Instead, it felt comfortable. Natural. Like you were always meant to be right there on his shoulder.

He looked down at you resting on him. At your snow bitten cheeks and soft, content smile. You weren’t scared, or even nervous. You weren't going out of your way to impress him, or try to demean him for an ego boost. You weren’t looking at him with unrealistic expectations he’d still manage to reach, only to remain unsatisfied with him. You were just there. Content, and smiling in his arms, happy to be with him.

You looked ethereal in the soft moonlight, the streetlights of the city encasing you in a halo. He was suddenly overtaken with the overwhelming desire to kiss you. To take you home and hold you forever. And met with the blood cooling realization that he was more than just attached to you. He was… infatuated with you. He refused to use the L word for this.

He couldn’t do that to himself. He moved away from you, a sudden movement that caught your attention. His heart sank looking at your wide questioning eyes. “Thank you, for the experience Soldier.”

You smirked, noting that he didn’t call you rookie. “Thank you for indulging me Captain.”

He nodded and patted your shoulder. “It’s late. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”

“Bright and early,” you confirmed. The two of you lingered for a second longer, the cold silence loud with everything the two of you wanted to say. He slowly slid his hand off your shoulder, and the two of you went your separate ways.

He spiraled for a good two hours when he got home. He couldn’t stop thinking about you. How natural it was to talk to you, how nice you felt in his arms, how breathtaking you looked even covered in snow. He dreamt of you that night, and when he woke up he could still feel the warmth of your lips pressed against his. He had to take a cold shower to get his head together. 

He had never felt like this before. His entire life he was too focused on other things for crushes. On being the best student, on graduating early and getting his doctorate, on researching the virus, on surviving. He’d had lovers, sure. But he never felt anything for them, aside from sometimes lust. He never felt tight in his chest, he never dreamed of them, never in a hundred years would have entertained the thought of building a fucking snowman with them. 

What the hell did you do to him? 

He spent the next eight months obsessing over you. Meticulously observing you like he would any other specimen. He found out how you managed your workflow, the gun you preferred to use at target practice, who you got along with at the RPD and who you only tolerated, how you took your coffee in the morning. 

He noticed all the small details. He noticed the way you chewed on your lower lip when concentrating, what kind of jokes made you laugh the loudest, the way your eyes crinkled when you were genuinely smiling. He noticed that you didn’t brush his hand away when he rested it on you, unlike how you did when Brad did the same thing. How you also went out of your way to be around him, and that you were always the first to act when he gave an order. 

He knew he shouldn’t do this to himself. He knew that he should have taken a massive step back and kept your relationship strictly professional. No more late night smoke breaks, or easy conversations in the break room. If he really wanted to do himself a favor he should have found a reason to fire you, or at least have you removed from the S.T.A.R.S team. 

He never tried to do any of that, because for the first time in his life he was scared he wouldn’t be able to do something. And where did that get him?

Here. Staring at the sinking ship that was Umbrella, and knowing he needed to get off before he was dragged down with it. He needed to send the S.T.A.R.S team to the Spencer Mansion to get the combat data he needed so he could do just that. The issue was, that meant the team was probably going to die. A sacrifice he thought he was willing to make. And he was, before you happened. Now the thought of sending you into that made his jaw clench. As brilliant as he was, he couldn’t think of a way to keep you out of the situation. 

Send you home? That would never work, Bravo team was in danger. You would never just sit idly at home while your team was in trouble – an annoyingly admirable trait of yours. Order you to keep watch at the office? Nope, that wouldn’t work either. That would be the first place Umbrella went when they realized he had gone rogue. So where did that leave him? 

Sending you into the mansion. But, maybe you didn’t have to die. You were just as capable as any other member of the team- if not more. As long as he could keep you alive until it was time for the mansion to go up in smoke, he knew he could get you out of there- and come out looking like the hero in the process. 

He didn’t have time to come up with a definitive plan, this was going to have to do. As unorganized as it was, he was confident it would work. It had to work.

He didn’t know what he’d do if it didn’t.

[crowsofdarkness]

Moment Of Weakness: Chapter Nineteen

-gif not mine. credit to owner-

Pairings: Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Content Warnings: language, 18 + smut, angst, fluff, affair, cheating, violence, kidnapping, faking a pregnancy.

Summary: Reader is the assistant to New York's most feared mob boss, James Buchanan Barnes. He had the picture-perfect life: status in the mob, friends, and beautiful wife. So why can't he keep his mind and eyes off of reader?

Authors Note: I just wanted to remind everyone who reads this, there are heavy moments of cheating/having an affair in this story. You might not agree with the actions of "reader" or Bucky but it does pertain to the storyline. If anyone is interested, tags are open for this! Just send me a message or comment!

Tags: @cjand10 @generalmoonpolice @sapphirebarnes @baw1066 @nameless-ken @minami97

I walked into the building, smiling bright as the morning sun, ready to finish this work day already. After he left last night, Bucky promised that when he would come by tonight, he would stay the night. He had planned on telling Natasha that he had to go out of town for something mob related. 

There was already a list of things I had planned; dinner at home, a movie cuddled together on my couch, and a warm bath to end the night. It was something that we had yet to do, a proper at home date. 

My body jumped with excitement every time I thought about it. 

A frown pulled at my lips when I noticed that Bucky’s door had been closed. He didn’t have any meetings planned so there was no need for it to be shut. Bucky also always took his phone calls with the door opened. 

I placed my things on my desk and softly knocked on the door, only to be met with silence. The thought of if he was coming in today or not crossed my mind so I sent him a quick text. 

Are you not coming in today? 

Some time would pass before I would even get a response. Three hours to be exact. 

By the time Bucky had decided to text back, it was nearing lunch hour and I was busying myself to run to the deli across the road to pick us all up something. Steve and Sam were playing a card game on the couch that sat across from my desk and Steve noticed the worried look on my face. 

“Everything alright?” 

By the mere tone in his voice, I could tell that the relationship we shared was not the same anymore. 

“Yeah,” I mumbled, not bothering to take my eyes away from the text on my phone. 

I’m held up in my office all day, sorry.

It was short, to the point. No sweet names or cringey emojis that Bucky had just found out of. This wasn’t like him, something being different; off. 

Steve stood to walk over to me. “Bucky?” 

I peered over his shoulder to make sure Sam wasn't paying attention and nodded. 

“Have you talked to him at all? I feel as if he’s avoiding me,” I said. 

He hesitated, unsure if he should even say anything. I could see it in the way he avoided my gaze, rubbing at the back of his neck. 

Steve was hiding something from me. 

“What do you know?” I asked. 

“I can’t be the one to tell you, Y/N. Bucky has too.” 

With a gentle squeeze on my shoulder, he went back to his previous spot on the couch. 

I gnawed on my bottom lip while gazing at the still shut door to Bucky’s office and decided to give it one more try, seeing if he would talk to me. 

“Bucky, can I come in?” I asked after my knuckles tapped against the door. 

There was quite a bit of shuffling behind it and my heart hammered when the door opened, revealing a very stressed Bucky. 

My voice lowered. “Are you okay?” 

He nodded. “I’m going to skip lunch today.”

The door shut just as fast as it opened and I was left staring at it, tears brimming in my eyes. 

“Y/N,” Steve’s soft voice called from behind me. 

I blinked a few times, tears splattering over my cheeks, and quickly grabbed my things to head to lunch.

I don’t know what I did to make you so upset with me but I don’t appreciate the cold shoulder all day. I’m about to leave for the day and you’ve barely come out of your office.

I hit send on the text while walking back to my desk from the bathroom. The day went on at a slow pace, my eyes darting from my computer to Bucky’s still shut door, not once seeing him come out of his office. That was the third text I sent him all day and with yet no response, I decided that tonight was officially off the table. He would not be rewarded with spending the night with me after ghosting me all day. 

As I returned back to my desk, I noticed that the door was wide open, and my feet practically dragged me across the threshold. Until I stopped myself when I saw that he made no effort to look away from his phone when he heard me walk up. Not even a quick glance my way. 

“Asshole,” I grumbled, plopping into my chair. 

Six minutes. That’s all I had left of my work day and I could go home to wallow in self pity in private. 

I used that time to scroll through Instagram, not having the chance to be on it all day. My thumb froze over one post, almost unsure to like it or not, because everything around me faded to black. Ears rang loudly with white noise and my heart dropped to the depths of my stomach as it shattered. The pain caused a sob to leave my lips. 

Cannot wait to meet you baby Barnes. Coming in six months. 

My vision blurred from the tears that spilled everywhere but I still could see the picture Natasha had posted announcing her pregnancy. It was a picture of a positive pregnancy test with her and Bucky’s vibranium hand holding it. 

With a broken gaze, I looked over to him and was shocked that Bucky was already watching me. His own eyes were broken, tears pooling in the corners of them. 

“I’m so sorry, doll,” he mouthed. 

No words were able to form, my mouth had run dry. I didn’t know what to say, to be honest. All I could do was gather my things and storm out of the office, the door slamming behind me shaking the walls. 

The persistent knocking on my front door was becoming too hard to ignore, it going on for the last five minutes. In tangent with my phone ringing, not stopping for a second. I did my best to tune it all out, staring off into the void of my living room wall, wishing it would stop; wishing everything would stop. 

“Doll, please open up.” 

“Go away,” I yelled, the anger suddenly bubbling to life. 

“Please let me explain!” 

I scoffed while shaking my head, even if Bucky couldn’t see. “Explain?!” 

Everything I had been avoiding came rushing to the forefront when I heard him begging me to let him in, to explain his actions. 

My feet dragged me to the door and I opened it with such force, it created a small wind tunnel. Bucky didn’t bother waiting for me to let him in, he pushed himself past me. 

“I’m so sorr-.” 

His apology was cut off by a hard slap to his face, my palm already stung with redness. 

Bucky rubbed at the raw spot where I had hit him and his jaw tensed. “You hit me.” 

“Trust me, I want to do a lot more!” I seethed. 

“Can you calm down so I can explain?” He begged. 

“Calm down?!” My voice bellowed. “You get your wife pregnant, hide it from me, then come here to explain yourself? How the fuck can I calm down?!” 

My shoulder rammed into his as I walked past him and down the hall towards my bedroom. His footsteps that echoed down the hall told me that he was following me close behind. 

“I wanted to tell you, Y/N. All day I tried to come up with the best way,” Bucky said. 

I spun on my heels and pushed him hard in his chest, my actions doing nothing to deter him. 

“Fuck you, Barnes! You’re such a liar!” 

I began beating his chest with my fist, pure hatred fueling my momentum. And he stood there, taking every hit. 

Out of breath, I let my fists fall to my side, and felt my chest rise and fall each time I swallowed a large amount of air. 

“Feel better?” Bucky asked. 

My eyes narrowed. “Go fuck yourself. I never want to see you again.” 

His shoulders dropped. “You don’t mean that.” 

I nodded, even if I didn’t believe it myself. “Get out.” 

Bucky didn’t move so I pushed him harder in his chest. “Leave. Now!” 

“Doll-.” 

I smacked him yet again, this time with so much force he stumbled back onto my bed. 

“You lost the right to call me that, Bucky! I can’t believe I fell for your lies again.” 

I ran a shaking hand through my hair. “I allowed myself to ignore the red flags because I cared that much for you. I believed that you wanted me, wanted a future with me. I bet the divorce was a lie too.” 

Bucky vigorously shook his head. “I promise you. That was all true. Matt finished the papers this afternoon.” 

“When did it happen?” I abruptly asked. 

He hesitated, unsure how to answer. “A few months ago. It was the night I drove you home from work and we had sex in the back seat.” 

If my heart wasn’t in a million pieces before, it for sure was now. 

“You’re such a dick!” I screamed while pushing him down on my bed. “I knew you were still screwing her.” 

Bucky leaned his elbows onto his knees and held his head in his hands. “You don’t understand how terrible I feel, Y/N. I wish I could take it back.” 

I wiped the tears away with the back of my hand. “Are you still leaving her?” 

He gazed up at me, lips parting and eyes welling with tears. “I can’t. She’s having my child.” 

My eyes shut, his words giving me exactly what I needed to end this. 

I pointed towards the door. “We’re finished, Bucky. You need to leave.” 

He was fast on his feet to reach for me. “No, this doesn’t have to end.” 

“Yes it does!” I wailed. “It’s one thing to break up a marriage but I refuse to break up a family.” 

Both of us were crying, not bothering to stop or hide the tears, and Bucky wanted to reach for me, fight for me, but knew that there was no changing my mind. 

“What about work?” He asked with a glimmer of hope. 

I gnawed on the inside of my cheek. “I can’t afford to quit. So I’ll see you next week. I need to take some time off.” 

Bucky nodded. “I didn’t want to hurt you, doll.” 

I grabbed my elbows, bringing my arms closer to my chest and avoiding his gaze, keeping my eyes trained to my feet. The only thing I could hear over his footsteps walking away from me was my broken cries, my body collapsing to the ground. 

[xreaderanonaccount]

Capitano x Worried!Reader

Synopisis: Gruff, strong, and stone cold Capitano with a worried s/o. Reader is G/N

Tags: Fluff, Dottore being an ass,

Divider credits: cafekitsune

Capitano with a worried s/o who is always scolding him for always getting hurt, but no matter how much scolding he gets he can rely on you and only you to patch him back up. Cause he doesn’t want the medics to patch him up, they’re scared shitless of him. But you, you patch him up with the utmost care and love that anyone envy’s for. He’ll gladly sit down and listen to you scold him over how he shouldn’t take 3 squads of ruins guards on his own. If it only meant he can have your hands on him. Your soft hands on him. Oh how he’ll melt in them, you have this man wrapped around your finger. 

“You have to be careful next time!” Your worried voice echos the shared chamber in the Zapolyarny palace. Capitano could only chuckle as he leaned back playfully crushing you beneath his weight. You yelled in frustration as you tried your best to push Capitano away but no luck. This man was heavy.

“I promise to be careful next time.” He sighed as you got off of you settling back down on the edge of the bed. Letting you continue stitching the open wound on his shoulder. You huffed as you took the needle through his skin sewing the wound shut. 

“You better be, if not I’ll have to go to the doctor and ask him to revive you myself.” You pouted as you tied the stitch close.

“Don’t go to the doctor.” Capitano’s voice suddenly became stern, you knew better to mention the doctor. Capitano doesn’t trust him at all, not even with a pillow. He’ll somehow turn that pillow into a killing machine…

“I know, I won’t” You softly smiled as you planted a kiss on his now clean and stitched wound. 

Capitano is very protective over you, especially that one time Dottore decided to pull a cruel prank by giving you a fake report on how Capitano was severely injured and he might not make it. You had a full blown breakdown worried about your poor lover. When Capitano came back to the Zapolyarny Palace so many fatui scouts came running to him rushing him to their shared quarters. 

You straight up built a memorial for him, with your closest attendant by your side who is trying to comfort you. As soon as your attendant noticed Capitano he quickly rushed him to you pleading with him to comfort you. Capitano wrapped his big overcoat over you and gave you a tight hug. You were shocked only for a little bit before you threw yourself onto him crying your poor eyes out in Capitano’s arms.Capitano would gently ask you what happened and through your tears you would tell him what happened. He swears he’s going to kill Dottore the next time he sees him. 

The minute Capitano walked into the Zapolyarny Palace he was bombarded by his men. All talking over themselves, he has no idea what is happening but the minute one of them mentioned your name he sternly asked what happened. One of them finally explained that you said that he had died. Capitano could feel a blood vein pop as he hurriedly went to the shared chamber. When he entered he spotted your sniffling form over a picture of you and him when you visited Mondstadt that one time. Your closest attendant was comforting you as you continued your obituary. Capitano softly closed the door trying not to gain attention from you, but alas he was caught as your attendant looked up and spotted him awkwardly standing near the door. The attendant rushed him over to you who was still crying your poor heart out. Capitano stared down on your crying form, he wanted to rip his heart out and offer it to you as an apology. But he knew that you would be angry about that. Capitano heaved an internal sigh as he removed his heavy outer jacket, draping it over your shoulders. You jolted in surprise, you whipped around to see Capitano kneeling down to you. You shouted his name as you threw yourself on him crying your poor heart out in his arms. Thanking the Tsaritsa over and over again for bringing him home safe and sound. Capitano soothes you, rubbing small circles on your back. 

“What happened my love?” He asked, his voice bringing so much comfort to you.

“D-dottore, s-said that you were… were” You couldn’t even finish your sentence before bursting into tears. But you didn’t need to say anything more. He already knew what happened, Dottore pulling one of his cruel experiments on you. When he explicitly told Dottore not to do his little ��experiments” on you. He’ll have to do a very very stern talking to Dottore. Not like he’ll listen anyway. 

Capitano is a strong and tough man but he has a very very soft spot for you. Imagine this, the strongest man in teyvat holding a small flower in his hand because you found one growing outside the palace. And since flowers are hard to grow in Snezhnaya you decided to give this precious flower to someone precious to you. 

“What do you have there Lord Capitano?” Childe asked, Capitano held a small daisy in his hand. His expression is hard to tell. 

“A flower.” 

[hehe-69]

꧁༺ 𝓑𝓸𝓷𝓯𝓲𝓻𝓮 ༻꧂

Part 15

A Jacob x reader long fic

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 aka pretty much the best thing I’ve ever written, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14

La Smut

Warnings: FLUFF, QUIL AND READER HEART TO HEART, FOUND FAMILY, SOFT JACOB, LOTS AND LOTS OF FLUFF, A DASH OF ANGST, WOLFPACK, PAUL A OLDER BROTHER, PAUL BEING A SOFTY, QUIL X EMBRY MOMENTS

Not proofread…non of my parts are so sorry if it’s hard to read🤣

Summary: Dinner time described in more detail and a continuation of the night. A dive into Quil’s sibling like bond between reader. Lovesick Jacob Black and his dad who loves the both of you.

Tag list: @coldonez aka my wife

—————

THE DINNER

It’s surprising, how easily you all fall back into this family like setting. All it took was some arguing and forgiveness. It’s so comforting, for a while you were so afraid you’d never have this family together again.

—

At the dinner table you sit with Jacob to your left and Leah to your right. You and her spend time talking and making fun of the way Jared stuffs his face. “Dude slow the hell-“SUCK MY TITS!” Jared shouts out interrupting Jacob who was trying to speak. Instantly Jacob starts wheezing, Jared said it in such an aggressive and demonic manner that it made you all laugh. You hold onto Jacob’s arm as you laugh out loud.

That moment is what breaks the ice between you all, and you begin laughing and picking on one another. But also sharing some sentimental moments between each other.

—

Paul pretends to start falling alseep as Jared tells him how much he loves him. “You’re like the best asshole of a brother I could’ve ever hoped for.” Jared fake cries and then stops as Paul begins snoring. “Hey wait-Paul I love you man-PAUL WE HAVE TEQUILA!” Paul shots up at that and grabs onto Jared. “WHERE?!!??”

—

There was infact no Tequila so Jared was throttled like a chicken by Paul for 30 minutes…I’m afraid to report that sadly…sadly Jared did in fact survive…so disappointing.

—

“LEAH I COULD LITERALLY KISS YOU RIGHT NOW!” You say aggressively holding onto her shoulder. She gave you HER dinner roll when Jared took the last one before you could gab it. “I’ve been dreaming of this moment.” She says with fake desperation, and you and her lean in but fail to seal the deal as you both start laughing.

Jacob chuckles at your antics, in the past he might’ve gotten jealous. But he’s so comfortable in your relationship and he trusts you so deeply…he also knows that you joke around with Leah about being lovers all the time.

—

You notice that Quil is letting himself actually soak up the love and affection Embry gives him during the dinner. He leaning into Embry, letting his boyfriend keep and arm over his chair, it’s nice seeing how happy and relaxed Quil is in this moment.

But you can’t help but notice the underlying guilt and shame that still wears down his frame.

———

As you’re helping clean up the dinning room, Quil joins in. Working wordlessly beside you as you both collect the dishes. You work on clearing them off and preparing then to be washed as he gets the sink and soap ready.

You sit with him, leaning in the counter and watching silently as he washes the dishes. Before he speaks up. “I don’t want to be like him…but I don’t know how to stop myself from becoming like my dad.” He just whispers it out, to anyone else, this might’ve seemed random but you have learned to read Quil very well. Enough to know he’s been torturing himself over the fright you two had. As much as he tires to hide it, this boy really does wear his heart on his sleeve.

“Just let yourself be happy Quil, let yourself be loved…you don’t have to be afraid of it anymore.” You pause eyeing his facial expression. “Embry is not going anywhere and you always have me here to talk to.” Your tone is soft as you speak to him, theres no one in the kitchen but you two. You eye him carefully as he continues to wash the dishes in silent contemplation, he looks tired, worn out from everything. All the pretending that he’s subjected himself to, the fighting, all the running he’s been doing for years. It’s no secret to you that Quil feels ashamed of who he is still, you know he always hears his parents words in the back of his head, telling him things and replaying thier disappointment in him.

“Quil, you don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not anymore.” You whisper out, and you feel your face begin to frown. Quil is such a beautiful person, he deserves to let lose and be as easy going as he so deeply wants to be. “We all see you, we all love you, we accept you and we will never abandon you or make you feel unlovable.” Quil puts the plate he was washing down in the sink. He puts his wet hands on the sides of the sink, head down so you can’t see his face through the curtain of his curly hair. To him, he’s really soaking in your words, he wants to be different, he doesn’t want to be like his dad. But to you, you fear for a second that you have taken it too far.

Before you can even begin to apologize, Quil pulls you into a hug. He burrows his face in you neck and you realize he’s crying, softly and silently, like he’s spent years practicing how to fall apart alone and on his own terms. You sit there with him, holding on tightly as he cries softly, he’s hunched over you and you can feel how much weight he’s letting you help carry.

Quil, in his most raw and honest moments, is so wonderful. He’s goofy and sweet, goes with the flow and brings life into the room he walks in. But he’s spent so long hating who he is and how he feels, his parents have everything to with that. Telling him he’s too soft, that he shouldn’t feel things as deeply as he does, that he needs to man up, and that he can’t be in love with his best friend.

“The house is going to be empty tonight, so it’s as good a night as any for the next big step.” You feel Quil suck in a breath at that, it’s something the two of you had been discussing for a while before everything fell apart. “You’re loved by who you are as a person…not the performance you have had to put on just to survive.” You’ll never know how badly Quil needed to hear those words, how they heal him, make him brave enough to finally let himself go.

“I love you Quil, you’re the best brother I could’ve ever asked for…even if you eat all my snacks before I can so much as look at them.” You whisper out the last part quickly and tighten the hug as if you wished to squeeze him to death for such a betrayal. It does what you hoped it would, it makes Quil chuckle softly, and wetly through his silent tears.

“I’m so sorry for what I said Y/N,” Quil’s voice is full of regret and sorrow. “I hope you know that nothing could be farther from the truth. Jacob is crazy about you, he always has been.” Quil laughs and then continues. “I remember when he first realized he was obsessed with you, he came to me and Embry begging us to help him. Telling us that he didn’t want to ruin your friendship just because he fell in love. As if it wasn’t painfully obvious.” You laugh at that, pulling away to glare playfully at him.

“Are you saying I was horrifically oblivious?” Quil chuckles and shakes his head up and down. “Oh yeah, it was terrible.” You groan out at his teasing voice, shoving him away laughing. He was about to go off on a tangent. “I mean it was so hard to watch!” He says, gabbing a hold of you and shaking your shoulders. “Everyday was like AGONY! Y/N! AGONY!” Quil is on full drama mode, but you can’t help but laugh at how much of his soul he’s putting into his performance.

“Okay, okay, I get it Quil.” You try to sound exasperated but you’re too amused in this moment, and a laugh escapes you. “DO YOU DO YOU REALLY!” Quill shouts out and beofre he can continue Paul comes in and puts him in a head lock and ruffling his hair. “KEEP YOUR LOUD ASS VOICE DOWN!” Paul says laughing out as Quil starts fighting for freedom. “UNHAND ME YOU HEATHEN!!” Quil screeches out in an old English accent. And you laugh at them both as they begin to bicker and play fight. Eventually Quil wiggles his way out and starts running away from Paul.

He watches him run out the room laughing. Before playfully pushing your shoulder. “Told you I’d fuck up anyone who messes with you.” And you grin at Paul who looks so free and happy in this moment. “I love you man.” You say honestly and Paul groans out, throwing his hands up and pretending to be embarrassed at the display of affection. “Don’t go all soft on me now Y/N…I love you too asshat.” Paul mumbles out the last part before walking away to hunt down Quil.

You lean against the counter, it’s wired, just hours ago you thought nothing would ever be the same. But now, now this bond you all share is stronger then before…maybe change doesn’t have to be so horrible after all.

“AHHHHHHH!!!!” you scream out as a pair of warm arms warp around your waist lifting you up into the air. “HAHAHA AIR JAIL BITCH!!!” You hear Jared scream out, and instantly your kicking your leg hard trying to get him to let you down. “RELEASE ME!!!!” You screech out but Jared just giggles like a mad man. “ONLY IF YOU STOP LOOKING SO DEPRESSING ALL THE TIME!!!”

“UNHAND THEM YOU SWINE!” Quil shouts as he’s made his way back into the kitchen after running from Paul. “PAUL WILL SLAUGHTER US BOTH IF YOU DO NOT REALSE THEM YOU FOOLISH BLOAT!” Once again Quil speaks in an old English accent. And both Jared and Quil scream in horror as Paul comes barreling through the kitchen. Jared sets you down before booking it outside with Quil in toe.

Me and my sister do this shit all the time

———

When it’s time to say your goodbyes and go back home, everyone is so clingy and lovey dovey. EVEN PAUL GIVES YOU A FULL ON BEAR HUG!

It’s all so sweet and warm it leaves you feeling fuzzy inside. You all squeeze into Jacob’s truck, Seth sits in the middle upfront with you and Jacob. As Embry, Quil and Leah sit in the back. It’s silent for a bit as you all get situated. Jacob starts the truck up and begins to drive away, waving back at Emily and Sam who wave goodbye from their spot on the porch.

“So Leah…tonight wasn’t nearly as bad as-“I KNOW QUIL YOU DONT HAVE TO RUB IT IN!”

———

Leah and Seth are dropped off at their house, and as you drop off Embry and Quil at yours you give Quil an encouraging thumbs up. He looks so nervous that you and Jacob start giggling at his pain from your seats in the front of the truck.

———

GOING BACK TO JACOB’S HOUSE AFTER THE STEAMY SESSION

Before going to bed, you and Jacob talk about the night. He tells you about his talk with Sam, and how theu reached an understanding. He tells you that Sam said he admired Jacob for how hard he fought for what he believed to be right. Jacob told Sam that he just wishes that none of this happened to them.

You’d be back next week for game night.

———

As you’re in the bathroom brushing your teeth, Jacob comes up behind you and wraps his arms around waist as he sleepy presses kisses to your shoulder and neck. You bring up your left arm to run your hand though his hair that is sticking up in all sorts of directions. Jacob is half awake as he kisses up to your jaw, and then pecks your cheek before resting his chin on your shoulder and looking at you through the mirror. He’s hands mover to rub up and down your sides.

He eyes are half open and he’s got this sheepish smile on his face. “Morning.” He whispers out, his voice deep and sleep ridden in a way that heats up your face. “Good morning sleepy head.” You laugh out softly as you lean down to rinse out your mouth. Jacob is shirtless, he got to hot during the night and took off his tee.

When you lean back up Jacob turns you around to kiss you, you giggle at him leaning away covering his mouth. “Ewwww morning breath.” You say teasingly and he laughs softly. “Don’t care.” He mumbles against your hand and shoves it away. He has his arms wrapped around your waist again so you can’t escape. You give into the kiss smiling into it as you run your hands through his hair. Jacob breaths out happily through his nose as he kisses you.

When you pull away he chases after your lips. “You have to get ready.” You remind him laughing once more. “Just one more…please.” He asks and gives you the most desperate look he can muster. And you give in to kiss him once more.

———

“Gotta say I’m gonna miss having you around all the time when you go back home.” Billy says as you and Jacob eat lunch with him. “Jacob is so much more tolerable with you around…I mean he just sulks around the house and-“Dadddd.” Jacob groans out in embarrassment. And you grin as you look at Billy, wordlessly begging him to continue. “It’s kind of depressing sometimes, watching him mopping about the house when he can’t see you.” As Billy continues to tell you all about Jacob basically acting like a lovesick puppy both around you and when you’re gone, Jacob covers his face with his hands.

You laugh with Billy and join in on the teasing of his son who has a look of pure betrayal by your actions. “I cannot tell you how happy I am that the two of you are finally together. I’ve been betting on this for years.” Billy looks really happy to see you every time you visit. On days that Charlie is over, he’s just as happy to see you.

…now that you think about it…Charlie doesn’t know Bella is better, he still thinks she’s sick…OH MY GOD WE FORGOT ABOUT POOR CHARLIE SWAN!!!

—————

IM BEGGING YOU GUYS PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE IN FUTURE PARTS IM RUNNING OUT IF IDEAS!

MOSTLY DUE TO THE FACT PAUL LAHOTE IS COMING FOR ME TO DRAG ME INTO A RABBIT HOLE OF OBSESSION

As always I hop yall enjoyed this part, this was supposed to be like a pallet cleanser after all the stuff I’ve put you readers through.

Next part will involve both you and Jacob talking to Charlie about Bella. Who DID NOT JUST THINK “oh I guess like just tell my dad I’m FUCKING DEAD AND CRUSH HIS SOUL!”

Feel free to comment what else you’d like to see in the next part.

Thanks for reading

Love ya🫶

Part 16

[quillsandcauldroncakes]

Forever Together (Rolan x Tiefling!Tav)

Rating: M (for implied smut) Minors Do Not Interact

Warnings: Nudity, Implied Sexual Content (Nothing explicit/fade to black), Blood, Death mentioned. Let me know if I forgot anything

Word Count: 3.4k

Themes/Tags: Romance, Fluff, Tooth-rotting fluff, Intimacy, Love confessions, Fade to Black Spice, Nudity, Bathing together, Sharing Bed, Petite Tav, Tav is smol but mighty

Characters/Pairings: Rolan x Tav, Tiefling!Tav, Rolan, Cal, Shadowheart (mentioned), Karlach (mentioned)

A/N: Ngl, the ADHD hyperfixation on my Sebastian Sallow fic has faded, but I'll finish it eventually, if anyone is actually interested lol But Rolan from Baldur's Gate 3 is my new fixation, so here's a mildly spicy (as spicy as it will get with me) love confession fic. Takes place after the fight with Lorroakan. Also, if you find any mistakes or grammatical errors, no you didn't

As usual, dividers are by @cafekitsune

Tav sighed contentedly as Rolan’s hand settled on her hip. His Master was dead, and he was safe now. Bloody and banged up, but safe. For now. But the female tiefling pushed the thought away.

Right now, all she wanted to focus on was him. Rolan. Her Rolan. His hands held her so gently against him as his nose brushed over hers delicately. The base of his horns nestled perfectly between her curled ram-like horns.

His warm breath fanned across her face, inhaling each of her exhales. His yellow eyes were closed as he took in everything. Leaving Elturel, running from goblins, and nearly losing his siblings to a cult, then coming to Baldur’s Gate only to find himself thrust into another nightmare.

Those events were behind him now. Lorroakan was dead, and Cal and Lia were safe. Thanks to this beautiful creature in his arms. Another thing he could not quite believe. After how abhorrently he treated her, she still rushed to his side after the battle and pulled him into her arms.

“I love you, Tav,” he murmured, his lips just a breath away from hers. He continued before she could respond, “I think I loved you from the moment you saved me from the shadows. You were a brilliant light in the darkness I never thought I would see again, not since – not since Elturel fell into Avernus. My life had been nothing but hardship but you came in your infinite kindness and saved me and my family. I was ashamed of the kind of man I was – still am. So undeserving of you, but I find myself thinking of you every moment of every day, needing you, craving you. You have become oxygen to me, and without you, the flame of my life would be snuffed out. I cannot bear to go another day without you. Please, my darling, end my agony and tell me you feel the same. Or tell me now that I am a fool for thinking you may, and I can go drown myself in the Chionthar.”

“No drowning will be necessary, you silly wizard.” Her soft voice reached his ears through the rushing of blood. His heart leaped in his chest and he pulled away to search her eyes properly. Her usual sharp-toothed grin was soft; her purple eyes glittering with unshed tears.

“I love you, Rolan,” she reached up to caress his bruised cheek, her deep purple-gray skin feather-light on his. “Under all the thorns and hurt, I saw a man who cared so deeply for his family, one who would do anything for them. You are brave, and you are strong, Rolan. Strength comes in so many different forms. Your strength and devotion made me love you.”

His salty tears stung the wounds on his face but her words were a soothing balm on the ones on his heart. Aside from Cal and Lia, no one had ever been so kind to him. Had loved him as he was. Had seen his flaws as strengths. Rolan had never met someone like her. And she was his.

“I- I would very much like to kiss you, now.” He mumbled, unable to think of any flowery words to express what he was feeling. He figured it best to show her instead. “Please.”

At his cracked voice and puppy eyes, Tav wasted no time in nodding her head and sliding her arms around his neck. Her lips paused just a fraction away to allow him to make the first move.

His claw-tipped hand cupped the side of her neck, while his thumb hooked under her jaw to tilt her face up towards him. He had not realized before how small Tav was, her strength and audacity making her seem much taller. Her delicate frame in his hold enticed the wizard even more.

Softly, his lips ghosted over hers as if testing the reality of her willingness. But when she made no move to pull away, only gripping his shoulder tighter, Rolan finally gave in.

The sensations and images his mind had conjured late in the night when he could not sleep - when he could only think of her - paled in comparison to this burning reality. While she let him lead the kiss, her touch was branded into his skin. Each swipe of her tongue against his, every small tug on his hair, sent fire blazing through his body.

She moved in tandem with him, pulling with his push, rising with his fall. Her body was the missing puzzle piece to his, her curves filling his edges.

Rolan moaned into her mouth and his hands gripped her hips tighter as her tail curled around his. The red appendage tightened around hers in return, the tip flicking over the barbed end of her gray tail.

The scrape of her claws against his scalp sent delicious heat downwards, only amplified by the soft whimper she let out at his tail’s ministrations. But as his mouth left hers, trailing kisses across her cheek, down to her jaw, and finally to her neck, she let out a pained gasp.

Immediately, Rolan’s mouth and hands were off of her, but he left their tails twined together.

“I’m sorry, I- did I hurt you?”  Rolan scanned her face and neck, but other than a few bruises, she appeared fine.

“No, you didn’t, don’t be sorry.” She pulled further away so she could roll her neck and shoulder, whimpering again at the painful twinge in her shoulder. “I think I got hit in the back, on my shoulder, during the fight, and tilting my head to the side hurt.”

Guilt filled him. She was hurt on his behalf. Of course, Dame Aylin also had a bone to pick with Lorroakan, but Rolan had seen the stormy look in Tav's eyes when she first came to Sorcerous Sundries, and the absolutely murderous look moments before the fight began. She was fighting for him, just as she always had. And now he had made it worse because he was caught up in his lust for her.

“I’m so sorry, my love. I should have gotten you to a healer first. Come, I believe we could still catch up with your cleric friend.” He grabbed her hand without giving her a chance to rebut him and gently tugged her along.

Trailing slightly behind him, Tav smiled widely. It would seem she was included now in his list of people he was stubbornly protective over. She skipped up to his side, wriggling her hand in his grasp to change their position. Long red fingers laced with dainty purple-gray ones.

Tav looked up at him through dark lashes but Rolan kept his face determinedly pointed ahead. She giggled at the darkened skin of his face, from his neck to the pointed tips of his ears.

She did not know what tomorrow would bring, or even the next few hours. But as she and her wizard entered the main floor of Sorcerous Sundries, and Karlach squealed at the sight of their tails coiled around each other, she found that the anxiety that plagued her had faded into the back of her mind.

Such worries are for another time, she thought to herself. Currently, she could think of little else other than the feeling of Rolan’s tail wrapped around hers, or his thumb stroking along the back of her hand as Shadowheart healed her.

With the others returned to the Elfsong, Rolan refused to let her leave, keeping a firm grip on her hand and tail. Her face burned as her companions all left with sly grins and raunchy quips.

“You really did not need to encourage them,” Tav sighed as he led her up to the tower. He chuckled but only shrugged. Truthfully, he felt that he had to. Quite a few of her companions looked at her in the same light he did.

Before, when he had no hope of her returning his feelings, he tried to convince himself she would have been better off with one of them. They knew her better, and longer. But now that he has her, a possessive beast rose in him that he didn’t know existed.

“I simply cannot bear the idea of you sharing a room with a man that isn’t me. Even if it is in separate beds.” He paused and pulled her in close. They had arrived at one of the floors of the Tower with bedrooms. None of them belonged to him, however. He does not think he could handle the shame if she were to find out the closet he had been permitted to sleep in.

At least he knew from his chores that these rooms were clean. And had very, very large beds. But first - his eyes caught the blood and dirt caked to her skin and light armor – a bath.

Her stomach flipped at the tone in his voice. It was the same one he used when dragging her to see Shadowheart. Firm, commanding – but low and gentle. She bit her lip to stop the schoolgirl giggle rising in her chest.

“But we could only afford the one room, it’s not as though there’s somewhere we could all stay and have multiple rooms. It’d be far too expensive,” Tav said facetiously, reaching up to curl one of his loose locks of hair around her fingers. He, too, needed a bath.

He narrowed his yellow eyes at her, a playful smirk stretching across his face. “Is that so?” He wrapped his arms around her waist backing them up until his tail could grab the handle of the bathroom door they stood in front of.

She nodded and hummed sweetly in confirmation. The grandeur of the bathroom hardly captured her eye, especially since someone far more radiant was right before her.

“That is too bad, then,” he sighed heavily, gently picking at the knots of her armor to free her of the blood-stained leather. “If only there was a dashingly handsome,” the first bit of armor fell. Her eyes were heavy-lidded as she gazed at his lips. “Generous.” She smiled wistfully, more armor falling. “Talented wizard, with a large tower with plenty of rooms, who would let you all stay. Free of charge, of course.”

She was left in only her linen top and thick black trousers. But now she was free of her armor - a vision he had never seen before - he could fully take in the curves of her body. Hells, she was beautiful. His breathing grew heavy as he fiddled with the hem of her shirt, eyes locked on her lips.

The black-painted lips holding his attention stretched wide, revealing sharp canines. “Sounds like a dream,” she breathed. “If you find such a wizard, let me know.” Her teasing smile set molten fire through his veins.

“Oh, hush, you.” He growled before pulling her into a searing kiss. Behind them, a mage hand filled the tub and bubbles filled the air. His hands moved slowly - reverently – removing the last of her clothing.

Her hands, less interested in being the only one bare, also shifted his robes from his body.

With death still looming over her head, or in it, she did not want to squander this opportunity. This opportunity to show him how much she loved him. How much she desired him.

Within the warm waters of the massive tub, Tav and Rolan showed each other the love each of them wished they had in the past. The pain of their upbringing, recent tragedies, the fear of the future, it was all washed away with the blood and dirt under the loving touch of their partner.

The morning sun filtered in through a crack in the heavy green curtains. But its light did not quite reach the slumbering couple on the bed, buried under pillows and blankets. She had created a nest of sorts before they fell asleep, akin to the one she said she had in her tent.

Rolan had sunk blissfully into her arms under the cover of her nest, laying heavily on top of her. She hummed a small tune and ran her fingers through his still-damp hair. And he would deny it to the Hells and back, but she definitely heard him purr when her claws traced the ridges along his bare back.

As the two lovers stirred, stretching blissfully sore muscles, they shared a soft kiss. Sometime in the night, Rolan had shifted from on top of her to lay beside her, cradling her soft, nude body to his. Utter bliss. He wondered if her tadpole had worked its way into his brain and ate a hole in it. This feeling of bliss and happiness could not be normal.

“Morning,” her voice was hushed, barely loud enough for him to hear. She had been rather – loud, last night. He would need to get her some tea for that.

“Good morning, my sweet love,” he greeted in an equally gravelly voice. She hummed and nuzzled deeper into his chest, tightening her arms around him.

“I do not wish to leave this bed,” she mourned. Her dark mulberry lips pressed light kisses to his chest. He chuckled at the positively bratty tone. She usually carried herself with poise and authority, traits beaten into her as a Ranger. Seeing this side of her filled him with pride. He doubted her own pride allowed her to show this side to many others.

Especially the way she acted last night. Gone was the hardened but sarcastic leader he had grown accustomed to. In her place was a yielding, gentle, and languid creature. She basked under him, letting him do as he pleased. He had no issues with the change in attitude.

She’s perfect, he mused as he brushed his fingers through her midnight locks. How had the gods created such a perfect creature and then cursed her to live such a life? He pressed his lips to her forehead.

“As much as I would love to tie you to this bed, my love, I’m afraid we both have responsibilities to address.” She huffed and hooked her leg around him, clinging to him like a leech.

“I don’t wanna,” came her muffled reply. “Stop being so responsible. We're always responsible.”

It was true. Of their separate groups, they were the responsible ones. She was the leader of her troupe and he was the older brother. But unfortunately, these are two duties that do not disappear overnight. How tragic that would be.

“I know, trust me, darling,” he slowly sat them up, keeping the blanket wrapped around them. “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but duty calls. And honestly, if we’re not down there soon, I’m sure either my siblings or one of your companions will come looking.”

She groaned and nipped at his collarbone. “I hate that you are right.”

“Hm, not often that I am when you’re around, it would seem.” He grinned smugly. She was always right, so he would take this win. She smacked her hand over his chest and pushed him away with a huff.

“Don’t let it get to your head, love,” she snarked back. The morning air was cool against her skin as she left the warm confines of her nest and lover’s arms. She paused. Is that what they were? Lovers?

They had confessed their love and spent the night together but what came next? She still had an illithid tadpole swimming in her skull, and the Absolute’s cult was preparing to attack any day now. Was a relationship really a smart idea in times such as these?

She turned to Rolan who had also left the nest and was reaching for his robes. His red skin, lined with ridges and toned muscles, had a soft glow in the morning light. His hair, usually tied back, was unbound and fell around his shoulders in gentle waves.

Affection swelled in her heart as she watched him silently. He had his lower lip caught in one fanged tooth; brows furrowed as he looked now for the armor he wore across his shoulders.

“I love you,” she said, her tone factual and clear. Whether it was a good idea or not, now that she had him, she was not going to let him go. For as long as she lived, no matter how short that time may be.

Rolan’s head perked up from picking up her underclothes. She smiled and padded over to him. His lips formed a soft smile and he helped her into her clothes with just as much reverence he had when undressing her the night before.

Kneeled before her, his hand trailed up her legs as he pulled her undergarments up, being extra careful of her tail. Rolan’s lips pressed against her stomach before he rose to his feet.

Her chest bindings came next and he could not help but trail his claws down her ribs. Tav jerked and a small laugh escaped her. He had discovered this rather adorable trait of hers when they had been bathing. And he loved it.

He took his time, caressing every bit of her as he adorned her with freshly cleaned clothes and armor.

“I love you more than you could ever know, my darling.” He held her close once the last bit of her armor was in place. She was glad that her skin was such a deep tone and the curtains were still partially drawn, otherwise, he would have seen the deep flush that bloomed from the moment he began dressing her.

“I think I might have an idea,” she whispered, breath fanning over his lips. “No one has treated me with such love and devotion as you have, Rolan. I know we started off rocky, but if I was given the chance to do it again – knowing that we would be here in each other’s arms – I would do it all over again. Tadpoles, goblins, and all.”

A shaky breath escaped him as he pressed his forehead against hers, the base of their horns rubbing pleasantly. “I am sorry for the way I treated you before. You are right, I was scared and protective of my family. But you proved to me there is still goodness in this world. I am happy we met, and I would do anything to keep what we have.”

Their tears mingled when she shifted to embrace his, cheeks pressed together. Soon, they would need to leave this room, this small slice of Heaven, of safety and love.

“I will return to you, I promise.” She sniffled, leaning herself into his arms. Rolan hid his face in her neck, arms caged around her. If only he had actually learned something from that bastard - then maybe he'd be of more use to her.

“Tell me what I can do. What can I do to ensure you do?” His voice was small and raspy, so close to sobbing. “I do not wish to even imagine a world without you in it. This tower, my magic, and studies, means nothing if I can’t have you beside me.”

“Stay here, for me. Not only because I wish for you to remain safe, but this tower is filled with mountains of undiscovered knowledge. We may be able to use it against the Absolute. I know no one better for this task than the Master of the Tower, himself.” She pulled away with an adoring smile.

Rolan kissed her then. Only she could make him hiding away from the battlefront seem necessary, crucial even.

“As you wish, my love. Whatever you need, I will be sure to have it ready.” He knew of some cannons the Tower was equipped with, but were not operational – another of Lorroakan’s neglected duties.

A knock sounded from the door of the bedroom.

“Rolan? Tav? Everyone is gathered downstairs, Gale prepared breakfast for everyone.” Cal's voice was muffled by the heavy wood. “Better hurry down before it’s gone.”

“We should go, that food won’t last long and I’m starved.” Tav pulled away and laced her fingers with his, tugging him to the door. “Gale’s cooking is honestly to die for so we might even already be too late.”

Rolan followed, tethered to her not only by their hands but by the invisible string he could feel tied around his heart, leading to hers.

They would make it out of this, safe and sound. They both swore on it silently. Then, they would begin their forever, together.

[herefortarlos]

Favorite 911 Lone Star Fandom Memories 🚒

Thank you @thisbuildinghasfeelings for coming up with this lovely idea and thank you @strandnreyes @nancys-braids @welcometololaland @rmd-writes @reyesstrand @she-walked-away @carlossreaders @nisbanisba @tellmegoodbye @heartstringsduet @freneticfloetry @firstprince-history-huh @carlos-in-glasses @bonheur-cafe @heartstringsduet and @goldenskykaysani for all the tags! I read every single one of you favorite moments/memories and they made me emotional and so happy and grateful to know you all and be a part of this fandom! 💖

Anyone who considers themselves a fan of the show, regardless of how engaged with fandom you are, should participate and share if you want!

rules here

Oh, where to begin?!? I am still in denial that it's coming to an end this Monday 🥲I haven't been thinking about it too much which is also why it took me a bit to write this and think of which fandom memories for me I wanted to highlight. I hope we'll all be there for each other if someone needs a little extra comfort in the days, weeks, months that follow! 💜

All the fanfiction, fanart, gifs, edits, etc. and the friends and good acquaintances made through them!

I will always be grateful to Tarlos and Lone Star because they got me to start regularly reading fics again! I used to have a 2 hour commute into NYC and I would read fanfic while sitting on the trains but doing that for 2 years unfortunately burned me out on fanfic and my previous obsession. From 2020 to late 2022, I didn't read much fic. It wasn't until I found Lone Star through FB clips and TK's iconic, "Sure ma'am but just so you know I am a homosexual", that I had found something new to obsess over and love to this degree! Tarlos and LS also brought me back to Tumblr and into fandom in the first place! After I binge watched the show up to season 3, I needed more Tarlos and so I looked through ao3 and started with tarlos fics by @rmd-writes! I saw Rae was on Tumblr and remembered that was where I used to always find fic writers to follow! So I made a new account specifically for the fandom, hello here for Tarlos 😂, and truly engaged in a fandom for the first time! I got to watch all of Season 4 live which was great, and loved seeing people's live reactions to everything on here and loved the codas, art and gif sets people made so quickly after the episode had aired!

And then of course I made fandom and lifelong friends! I started engaging in fandom by leaving unhinged and excitable tags on people's fics and works 😅, as I tend to do, and slowly started becoming mutuals with people! And then @heartstringsduet really opened me up by dming and thanking me for my tags on a fic of hers, and the rest is history 🥹. Michelle really helped me to feel open and comfortable on here and I decided to share my name with people and now I have friends that I know I'll keep in contact with despite the show ending! Some of the most kind, creative, talented, accepting and welcoming people are in this fandom and I am beyond grateful to Lone Star for introducing us! ❤️

The lead up to the Tarlos wedding!

Gahhhh, all the bts we got, and the press tour Ronen and Rafael went on and that Hello! photo shoot, pretty sure my heart stopped when we got those pictures, not to mention the 2 episode Season 4 finale! Now that was a time to be alive! It was treated like such a real wedding and there was so much amazing promotion and was definitely wedding of the year for me!

Discovering I was pansexual and being more open with my sexuality IRL!

I always knew I was queer back in college, although parts of high school definitely make more sense when I stopped to think about them 😂. But because I was in a straight presenting relationship, I never thought to be more open with my queerness? Sure I had those few friends that knew and that I could feel comfortable with, and I had 1 good fellow queer friend at the time to confide in, but I guess I was still learning things about myself and how much of me I wanted people to know? Anyways, Brian Michael Smith and Ronen's coming out story helped me to identify myself and encouraged me to be my authentic self with people! I got my first pride flag because of Lone Star, that I will continue to display outside my house to show that this is a safe place for people that need that, and have met so many diverse and other LGBTQ+ individuals because of it! And also because of that, a good irl friend of mine came out as trans to me first because she felt safe with me! So yeah, a lot of good things to thank a show like 911 Lone Star for 💗.

Finally, becoming a beta reader!

I have been so lucky and have the most fun having been a beta reader for many talented writers in this fandom! Getting to see and help people with their works before they're published, seeing lines and dialogue that I suggested go into the final fic! Without a doubt one of the best things this fandom has given me, along with the many friendships that started because of it! 💖

An OPEN and zero pressure tag for a few people that I don't think have done this yet. @reasonandfaithinharmony @ladytessa74 @carlos-tk @eclectic-sassycoweyes @paperstorm @dear-viv @whatsintheboxmh @alrightbuckaroo @lonestardust @bubblesandroses8 @emsprovisions @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @goodways @theghostofashton @henrygrass @lemonlyman-dotcom @guardian-angle22

[disapunk]

MILLIONS of Voices; A psychosis ZINE.

It's done! I know I took a lot of time making this zine, for the short length it is, but... I went through some personal problems. either way, I made it! I wanna thank you again, to everyone who shared their stories, to everyone waiting for this zine, to every person on the schizospectrum out there.

Trigger warnings: -References to many types of DELUSIONS.

-References to HALLUCINATIONS. of course.

I don't wanna make anyone fall into a psychotic episode from this, so please be careful as it obviously portrays psychosis in an artistic way, with poems, and drawings.

Let me know if there's any problem with downloading it.

For that one person who wanted me to tag them: @allisterrible

IF you can't read the letters. Here's the alternative :]

''MILLIONS of Voices

a ZINE about psychosis

''MADE by DISAPUNK''

''SOMETIMES I BELIEVE I AM GOD

and as i lay in the grass, not completely alone, there's someone, something, everyone is here, everyone i haven't met, everyone i did met, they're watching every move of my own.

i am their god, i am a god, i am god, i am everything and nothing, i am the sun that goes through your windows, and the pray, that, goes to me, the holy cries and pleasing god.

SOMETHING I BELIEVE I'M DEAD

so cloudy days where I think of death, not necessarily because it's the ultimate goal, the objective, for in spite of everything, i, i am already dead, my body decays and rots, slowly and painlessly, for in spite of everything, i, i already live dead in a dream, perhaps this is what comes after death, endless daydreaming.

STORY BY @disapunk''

''and yet i still felt my skin stay just as cold and lifeless as before, and i still felt my limbs rot away and my muscles atrophy, and i limped when my legs went into rigor mortis, i still spent nights completely still in my lifeless catatonia.

STORY BY @/rotmanlovesyou''

(I can't find the user.)

''THOUGHTS

thoughts of suicide?

no.

thoughts of starving?

yes.

thoughts of rotting in bed?

yes.

thoughts of suicide?

no.

thoughts of a late night walk?

yes.

thoughts of driving too fast in the snow?

yes.

thoughts of suicide?

no.

thoughts of bashing your head into a wall?

yes.

thoughts of drowning in a bottle?

yes.

thoughts of suicide?

no.

thoughts of jumping?

yes.

thoughts of purging?

yes.

thoughts of suicide?

POEM BY @wizardlizardtravels''

''withered petals overflow through the debts of my chest, as my delusions devored what's left of my flesh.

familiar whispers waltz between my ears,

the reaper's kiss, the final touch, i'll hold dear,

what's the value of truth, if it never remains?

it never changes, but was it ever the same? as if submerged by countless paranoid lies, forcing reality to softly mumble goodbye.

POETRY BY @cindelsclouds''

''i'm surrounded by the color yellow, many eyes look from it straight at me. i try my best to stay calm and mellow, while I notice what the others cannot see. a thousand hands reaching out to touch me, mirrors surround me, my reflections grin, i try my best to see what's around me, while I feel my armor's made of tin. "you're in danger!" everything is screaming. i'm observing myself, the strangest fellow. as the moon in the sky is gleaming, i'm surrounded by the color yellow.

STORY BY VINCENT''

''fuck OFF voices.

always bite the hand that feeds you.

ORIGINAL BY @bendersfolkpunkutopia''

''Hello, this is @/Disapunk. First of all, I wanna thank everyone who shared their most personal experiences, their deep stories, their art, maybe you, or they, were afraid of showing them, but believe me, many of us appreciate what you do.

To anyone trying to recover, I believe in you, you'll find a way out, you can do this, you will do this, every small step is process and I'm very proud of you.

To anyone who's seeking a diagnosis, may you be heard, from the bottom of my heart, I hope you get the help that you need.

To anyone psychotic, you are not alone in this, be patient with yourself, be gentle, take it one day at a time. Take care. You're trying your best and I'm proud of it.

To non-psychotic people, I hope you learn from this, I really, really hope you get to ''know'', (while not first-hand) how it feels for some of us.

To anyone reading this zine, thank you.''

[mars-writes-yandere]

Yandere Golden Boys

a/n: im finally making yandere oc’s after scrolling through the tag for HOURS. I have been wanting to do this for a while but after seeing all the amazing oc’s im making them myself

Yandere Golden Boys! who have known each other since they were kids. They’re no stranger to sharing so why would a partner be any different?

The persistent flirt, Luka,who always gets what he wants. When he sets his eyes on something and wants it, hes going to get it. His curly blonde hair and deep blue eyes add to the charm. He's known for sleeping around and using women like tissues.

The friendly jock, Mae , who never fails to put a smile on someone's face. Constantly smiling, the chestnut haired boy is always helping people out. Star student, perfect attendance, and great football player. Everyone loves him.

The prick of a student council president, Eden, is always making people’s day worse. He has a grudge against anyone that doesn’t doesn't follow the rules, including teachers. Due to his high standing he has the power to makes someone's life miserable and trust me he will

All three boys just seem to always be together which is how they met you. You were at the mall alone. It was a rare occurance to be out alone but you only needed a couple things. You too were busy putting your wallet back in your bag, You didn't notice you were going to walk right into a group of boys. Hitting your head on one of their backs you groan slightly and rub your head before looking up at who you bumped into. It was a talk man, probably 6’5. He smiled down at you in concern “Are you okay?” he asks. He can barely get the words out though as his heart hammers in his chest. You looked adorable looking up at him with your doe eyes and crinckled nose! A blonde boy peeked over the other boy's shoulder and smirked seeing you. You gave him a polite smile as you went to pick up your discarded bag. The blond beat you to it though, quickly picking up the bag before you. He handed it to you with a wink. A boy with combed black hair watched the scene in interest. You seemed polite and mae seemed to already have taken a liking to you.

The Three boys introduced themselves to you as Luka, Mae and Eden. After you told them your name they watched as Mae took out his phone and was already searching your name on instagram.

As College Sophomores the boys don't need to live in the dorms so they opt to share an apartment. The three boys spend all night stalking your socials, learning about your likes, dislikes, who you are close to and who they need to look out for. These three will find a way to worm into your life. You'll suddenly see them everywhere. Soon you exchange phone numbers and start to hang out casually. Casually will turn into every week and every week will turn into every day.

Mae is like a puppy when he's with you. He's kind to everyone, yes but he worships you. You're his everything and he will do everything to make sure you know it.

Luka is still flirty but he means what he says. When he calls you beautiful and holds your hand he means it. He teases you whenever you get flustered but he thinks its the most adorable thing ever

Eden is softer for you. He's not great at verbal affection like the other two so he tends to be more physical, Possessive hugs and hand holding, desperate and obsessive kisses ect. He loves to see you cry though. It doesn’t have to be out of pain, he doesn't necessarily like to see you in pain but he thinks your tear stricken cheeks and soft whimpers are adorable. God forbid anyone else makes you cry though. He is not afraid to get his hands dirty.

[fourraccoonsinacoat]

Mongrel Hearts | Chapter 14

Pairing: Heinrix x Rogue Trader

Read on Ao3

Summary: At the behest of the Vizier of the Bloodspun Web, and to the dismay of her Seneschal, Visenya and her retinue visit the lower decks in search of an ancient hidden temple. Author's Note: Some people have reached out to ask about my writing process, specifically about keeping a weekly posting schedule, so I thought I’d share my answers here in case anyone else was curious. I actually started this fic as a way to develop a better writing process after becoming extremely discouraged with my writing late last year. Sparing you the details, I took a hard look at my writing habits and decided I’d spend this year developing better ones – based around tendencies I know I have. I’m extremely deadline-driven, and have a habit of over-analyzing or over-thinking my work to the point where I get discouraged. Weekly posting is my way of using that deadline-driven tendency to force myself out of over-analyzing everything I write, because the chapter’s got to get posted and we’ve got to move to the next part of the story. I’m currently writing at a pace of about one chapter ahead of what’s been posted, and there are several subplots in my working document tagged as “unresolved” and they haunt me nightly. All that to say, my process is a bit of a mess right now, but that’s okay because the point of this fic is me getting out of my comfort zone, forcing myself to write and fixing/practicing various habits. Thanks for hanging out with me while I sort through my writing woes. Anyway, time to dive into the DLC and see what’s going on in the depths of the dynasty’s flagship. I’m excited about this subplot and all the lore it touches on. Let’s see what these space nerds are up to this week! Listening To: Forgiveness – Emarosa

Excerpt From Chapter 14: Walk a Little on the Wrong Side

“Lord Captain, I must insist – have you lost your mind!”

The Seneschal’s voice rang off the plasteel piping that snaked around the upper deck – concealing wires connected to consoles and cogitators. For a brief moment, the eyes of those on the bridge turned anxiously to where the First Officer trailed after the Rogue Trader – before those eyes were quickly and politely averted.

Visenya paused in her stride several paces from the lift where Kibellah, Idira, Jae and Argenta waited to join the Lord Captain’s escort to the lower decks. She spun on a back heel, turning to face Abelard.

“Could you do anything about it, even if I had?” Visenya asked, her voice quizzical and amused.

Heinrix stopped alongside the Lord Captain and her Seneschal, mouth turned down in a frustrated grimace as he listened. He rather agreed with Abelard that the lower decks were a perilous place for the Rogue Trader to go wandering about, looking for a death cult temple. And the more Visenya made light of the concern, the more it aggravated Heinrix. He had been debating saying something – weighing whether his input would help or harm the situation since the Lord Captain explained her intent to seek out the Temple of the Bloodspun Web earlier that morning.

“Danrok?”

Heinrix glanced at the High Factotum as Visenya addressed him. The nobleman been loitering nearby – apparently the sort to never miss some good hearsay or gossip.

“He cannot, Your Ladyship,” Danrok explained, stepping up next to the Seneschal who looked as if he wanted to jettison the noble out the nearest airlock. “In order to impeach you, citing madness and general delirium, you would need to be officially declared a traitor to the von Valancius dynasty. The decree of which may only be made at the behest of the Rogue Trader, herself – as you are the Emperor’s chosen, and thus your word is law.”

A profoundly exhausted sigh – the sort one makes while grasping at the last frayed shreds of their battle-hardened composure – rose up from Abelard as Visenya fixed him with a pleased smile.

“Don’t fret so much, everything will be fine,” the Lord Captain assured – her voice carrying a frivolous confidence that only served to deepen Heinrix’s scowl. “And if it’s not, we’ll just stab a few people, toss a few grenades and it’ll sort itself out like it always does.”

[sshushayla]

im just a girl.

aurélien tchouaméni x fem!reader. Fluff. when you are just a girl and he is aurélien tchouaméni, things like this will happen.

It is your sixth week as Aurélien's PR assistant, and you sat down on your rolling chair turning yourself round and round in your small cabinet, thinking and reflecting on all those nights you worked your ass off for your resume, going to endless interviews, just trying to hold onto one strong point as your feet ached to run to your manager and throw your resignation letter.

Aurélien was almost insufferable, he was one step away from giving you a heart attack. Every time your phone pinged in high-pitch, your heart would beat faster on what kind of mess he had created for you to clean.

Not that he does much around but when he does, it is a war out there for you. His spectrum fascinates you, the range goes from simple thirst traps in his Instagram stories to disclosing his actual secret campaign he did with Calvin Klein.

Yet he kept yapping and opening his mouth about the campaign again after you cleaned up his mess in his Instagram live, you almost cried out blood as your manager invested their entire being on screaming at you when your manager could handle Aurélien.

You held onto the handle of the gym door, your lips tight with a smile. Mentally preparing for a brief talk about his unprofessionalism or a hideous murder that was about to take place; his or yours, time would tell. You swung the door open just for you to shut it, your whole back pressed against the door.

This guy is almost naked, with his shorts hanging onto his waist for dear life, and a towel around his neck to clean his dripping sweat. Now, you are annoyed with him yes, of course since it is your work; but you are just a girl. The image of his heavy breathing, his tight core, and his thick thighs were not to be blamed, and nor was it leaving your mind, it never leaves your mind.

Before you pulled yourself up, the door was yanked open for you to squeal as you almost tripped but a gentle hand held onto your waist catching you before you fell.

Your eyes wide open, falling straight to the man who had awoken your need to fuck a priest, or just, well anyone out there. The glistening swear still sliding down his forehead, the hot heat of his determination in the gym greeted you.

"Princess, I would never let you fall." Aurélien's voice filled with amusement. You pulled yourself away from his grip entering the gym without a word shared. You put your laptop and your name tag down on the desk neatly sitting on the spare chair in the gymroom.

"Thank you, but I would rather not call you a prince charming right now." You mumbled for him to hear as he grinned showing off his teeth. You shut your eyes with your head facing down, "You make me want to kill myself." You confessed, shaking your head continuously. He chuckled at your defeat.

Walking toward you, he pulled an extra chair that was next to you; turning around to straddle the chair, Aurélien leaned in closer to see your face. You glanced up to see him already staring at your lifeless face.

The silence was painful, it was not those playful silence where you would playfully glare at the man and ask him to clear up his shit, and he would playfully claim that you would do the job for him.

"It can not be that bad. What did I do?" He nervously chuckled this time, he shrugged his shoulder in confusion. Aurélien had not seen you this tired of his shit, or in a very long time. You sighed, reaching for your laptop as you searched for Twitter.

Whipping the laptop toward Aurélien, you cross your arms as you see his focused face which includes a soft pout formed with his thick lips in concentration and furrowed eyebrows coming together and it only took you a few seconds to think. To reach for his face, or to take the risk of leaning as forward as you possibly can.

Aurélien seems like a such a good k-

"Okay, so I fucked up." He nervously chuckled, again realizing he did fuck up pretty bad for you.

Back to business, business, business.

You snatched your laptop away from his grip to put on the table, turning your body away to find the anger in you, your mind only comprehending just how easily he could bend you over the table, or bend the table; you would not mind any show.

Back to business, business, business.

"This isn't the first time, Aurélien. I had to make you pull out that Andrew Garfield stunt he did for the last Spiderman movie just for you to fuck me over." You expressed your anger with your fingers forcefully pushing his chest. Aurélien sat in silence, hearing you complain and complain about his reputation with the brand; but your words inaudible for the man.

His eyes were very much consumed with the way your lips would touch at certain words, and how his fingers would feel against your tongue, your hot tongue rolling around his fingers like a lollipop.

"I do not even watch Spiderman." He whispered but you bored your eyes at him quickly catching his eyes on your lips. You glanced around the room, not uncomfortable but you just didn't know how much patience you had before you launched yourself at him fully.

"I was not even talking about that, Aurélien. The whole Calvin Klein campaign is a secret, you were not supposed to mention it again in your fucking Instagram." You stood up from the chair, throwing your hand up in frustration, not wanting to look at him for another minute; to keep the job.

The whole situation is absurd, you were fully clothed while he was almost naked. The situation would most likely look crazy for an outsider but this is the form of conversation you have with Aurélien at all times.

You with your full attire while Aurélien with his gym shorts.

"You know, I do not know what game we play with each other." He said, taking you back as you gasped at the closeness with his hot chest hitting your back. Turning around, your eyes leaned up to see Aurélien had his eyes fixated on you.

It was not those mischievous eyes he would give this time. It was hazy nor did he lean down to look at you, he kept his posture composed for you to force yourself to look up.

"This is the game where I tell you about your fuck ups." You mumbled, trying to push Aurélien away but it only invited him to cup your wrist. "Let go, Aurélien." You said firmly, your eyes nervously glancing at the door of the gym. It is a free space anyone would walk in at any given time.

He shook his head. You took a few steps back as it hit the gym mirror. It was a complete defeat from your side, all that self-control aching to be released.

"Do you remember what I asked you last time as well?" He softly asked, his hot breath hitting the shell of your ears, you flinched away.

Why do you act like you don't want me the way I want you?

You cleared your throat, trying to loosen away from his tight grip. "Because it is that simple, I do not want you." You smiled tightly.

Aurélien chuckled, his boyish grin on his face; he shook his head, denying your words. "Stop lying to me. I might be shit at reading the room about anything but you," He said with his same shit-eating grin, "You are too easy to read."

Sighing, you gave up; sliding down on the gym floor with your legs pressed against your chest and your wrist still strongly gripped by Aurélien. He arched down to match your eye level and with his hand, he separated your thighs to create a room for himself.

"What do you want me to do?" You asked, tilting your head to the side; asking Aurélien with your body wanting his heat against yours.

He cupped your cheeks, and with no words said, he leaned in. You slowly closed your eyes to finally feel him but his lips never reached yours, only to hear the same annoying chuckle that had been getting on your nerves today.

You glared at him, making a joke out of you. You tried to remove his hand away from your face. Aurélien cupped your cheeks harder, "Baby, I want you to want me like how badly I want you." He said, his hand lowering down to your shirt to feel your naked skin, his fingers drawing random patterns against your skin as he reached your bra strap unhooking the button.

"Can you do that for me?" He asked.

You nodded your head. Yes, yes you could.

[theoneandonlysemla]

Sujamma Sundas

[This week Sujamma has been brushing up on his literacy. It's hard being a humble Nix-Hound. Reading doesn't come naturally to him, but he's doing his best! This week Sujamma is hoping you will help him learn to read!

Post a favorite scene, favorite sentence, favorite dialogue, favorite anything from any fic you've written! If you haven't written any fic, feel free to share your ideas. If you don't have any, recommend a friend's fic!]

Tagged by @skyrim-forever and @dirty-bosmer! Thank you <3

Tagging: @vanilleeistee @bougainvillea-and-saltwater @elavoria @firefly-factory @hircines-hunter @illumiera @lillxart @ladytanithia @pocket-vvardvark @rakaiawriter @sheirukitriesfandom @thequeenofthewinter

Honestly, I was like "uuuuhhhh, what did I even write in my life" at first but then I remembered that one specific scene in Dealings with Daedra: Boethiah's Wrath that always makes me so happy when people reach it while reading! That's the one.

Nevri and Morotar have been on the road and poor Nevri had to fight her way through a draugr infested nordic ruin. They now have reached an inn, where they stay the night and Nevri helped herself to a bottle of wine. Let's say, the two of them had a not so pleasant conversation and Nevri left, to wash the rest of the draugr blood from her body. [I'd love to put the entire scene here, but that would be like 2,5k words, so take a snippet:]

A knock on the door startled her, interrupting her train of thoughts. She sat up in the tub, one arm covering her breasts and the other grabbing for the hilt of her sword. Her heartrate rose. She was ready to fight, in this case, completely bare. 

“Who’s there?” She uttered, feeling that she was no longer master over the movements of her tongue.

Instead of an answer, the door opened. Back through the archway she was able to see it, but the light over on the other side of the room was dim. Too dim to recognize anyone who had entered. Only a tall silhouette. Her heart skipped a beat. What did he want in here?

“What’s the matter?” She prattled, cursing the amount of wine she had drunk.

Still no word, but she heard heavy steps on the stone floor. The figure traversed the archway and light fell on his body. Nevri’s guess was right, the Altmer stood in front of the bath. The sword still in hand, she let herself sink in a little deeper, her black hair floated around her body. Automatically she crossed her legs and shifted a bit to the side, turning in the tub. Expectantly she stared at the High Elf.

“What is the matter?” She repeated her question, this time slow, to not make it too obvious that she was drunk.

He did not wear his armour anymore, only the boots were a reminder of it. He looked over her and Nevri would have liked to vanish. She did not know, how much of her naked body he was able to see, but every little part of her bare, gray skin was too much.

“As you have been gone for quite a while, I found myself in the responsibility to check on you.”

“Check on me?” She repeated. “Why would you?”

“You are the one who pays me. It would be quite inauspicious if you were to drown drunken in a tub.” He sounded reproachful.

“Canmal pays you, not me. So, you can let me drown in peace,” Nevri answered and let the blade fall out of her hand.

Coin was the only reason, he cared about her wellbeing. She knew that, but it still stung. Without giving him any further looks, she let herself sink under the water. She held her breath, eyes open. And she counted. One, two, three… Hopefully he would be gone soon. Thirty-six, thirty-seven, thirty-eight… She could not hear any steps, but the water around her ears may deadened the sound. Sixty-four, Sixty- She had to resurface. With her hair sticking to her face, she emerged from the water. She rubbed it out of her face and to her surprise, Morotar still stood next to her.

“You have checked on me. I am fine. You can leave,” she nagged.

Instead of leaving he held a towel in her direction. Reluctantly she took it, giving him a confused look.

“Out,” he said in his most strict voice. “Now.”

“No?” She answered, but being very unsure of her response.

He made a big step closer to the tub, now standing directly in front of it. Looking down on her, his blue eyes fixated her. His expression was unreadable, frozen in place. Nevri pulled her legs closer to her body, clutching the towel in front of her. She felt her heartbeat fasten even more; shivers of excitement rushed through her. Her mouth was dry and to withstand the eye contact was more than exhausting. Morotar bowed forward, his head was in line with hers. She breathed in his smell and felt the warmth emanating from his body.

“If you do not leave this tub right now, I will pull you out and throw you into your bed. Without granting you to cover your bareness. And maybe, I will change my mind on the way and toss you into the little lake outside, as you are so unwilling to leave the water. You would be sober in no time.”

Nevri swallowed hard and her gaze flitted to the pile of clothes and armour pieces on the floor. No, she really did not want to leave the bathroom without her garments or her armour. She had no choice but to obey his order.

“At least turn around if you insist on staying in here,” she mumbled.

[dsireland86]

Tag list: @philomenie @supersquirrel1996 @foliosgirl @angelmarie89 @fadingintothegrey @thisbicc @lacy1986 @dominuslunae @shayzillaaaa @mrsnoahsebastian @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @stardustsirenmelody @romanreigns-supreme @anything-more-than-human @into-the-grey @rumoured-whispers @myownthoughts12 @sister-sebastian @missduffsblog @bngurngheart  @somebodyllelse @xxkittenkissesxx @dizzylmwahh @kenjipepsi1 @blackveilomens @chey-h @disappearintothegrey @jilliemiw86 @pathion @fear-its-beauty @an0mallly @potterheadquinn @flowery-mess  @bloody-spades

 “Show me you're better off without me/ Choking on every word  you said, we'll see, we'll see /Don't breathe another word about/me I'll leave and you can finally rest in peace, we'll see”

Noah, By the time you read this, I'll be gone. You have to understand that it's better for both of us this way, if I just vanish from your life and wipe your slate, your consciousness completely clean. Once you're finished with this letter I guarantee you will hate me and just the thought of me or the sound of my name will make you cringe with disgust. It will become a bitter poison on your tongue. Those who are loyal to you will no longer be my family. None of you will ever want to breathe my name again let alone utter any words about me to anyone. I'm warning you now, Noah, what I'm about to tell you is going to ruin you. It's going to break your heart so badly you're probably going to wish you were dead. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm doing this to you, but it's the only way. You have to know the truth about what happened during those three days in Montana on that last tour we were on together; you deserve to know, because it was the moment that everything changed for us. You're better off without me, Noah, and in time you'll see. In time you'll be able to rest in peace.  

Noah:

“I didn't want to finish the letter. Knowing she was already gone was enough, and reading it, having it spelled out in front of me would’ve only made the gash in my heart worse. But I decided to finish anyway but regretted it instantly.  I swear I could feel myself slowly slipping away as her words began to bring out the worst in her."

I rested my forehead against the back of her shoulder. 

“I'm so sorry. I can't imagine what you must have been feeling. Being dumped, abandoned without any explanation is a horrible feeling. It can take someone’s mind to such a lonely place and destroy you.”

“You would know, wouldn't you,” I said while playing with her fingers. 

She leaned back against my chest while sitting between my legs. Turning her head at just the right angle she was able to glide the tip of her nose softly along my jawline and it filled me with a yearning of wanting to be inside her again. 

“Not like you do.” 

I shivered when her lips left a trail of soft kisses on my skin. 

“Read me more, please. I want to know everything,” she urged. 

I sighed, and even though I really didn't want to, I knew sharing this part of my life was important for us. So, I continued.

“Lying in between the memories choking me, and I don't know which way to go, but I'm okay to never know”

The night you told me the truth about cheating on me, it broke me, but not in the way you might think. I was angry, full of guilt, relief, sorrow, and regret that created a huge mess of emotions I didn’t know how to deal with. Running was my only option. I had to escape the pain of knowing how horribly I'd hurt you and you didn't even know it.  Noah, you were brave enough to be honest with me about what you did. You admitted your guilt and how ashamed it made you feel.  You truly believed you'd hurt me and watching the way it tore your mind and heart apart left me in agony. I wanted to tell you the truth then, but I just couldn't bring myself to, so I took the coward's way out and ran away.  I called Jolly and cried to him. He said he couldn’t understand anything I was saying let alone an idea of what I was talking about but he did his best to console me anyway.  The guilt I felt, knowing what I’d done to his best friend just made everything blur together and with the way I was driving I didn’t see the headlights of the other vehicle in my lane. Jolly was still on the phone when I screamed right before the collision happened. That was the last thing I remembered before I woke up in the hospital. So, what is the truth that was too hard for me to tell you even though I was given the chance to say many times? Noah, I hope you're sitting down, because what I'm about to say is going to be the death of whatever peace your mind had about me.

Noah:

“Noah?” Her soft voice calling to me made me lower my head and when her hand collided with my cheek, her touch brought me back to reality. 

The past wasn't real, but she was, and so was the feeling of her naked body against mine. Turning herself around so that her legs were on either side of me and her arms were resting on my shoulders, she leaned in and kissed me, slipping her tongue inside my mouth little by little.  She was making me so hard and I knew she could feel me between her legs, pressed tightly against that sweet soft spot of hers I loved so much.  I couldn’t control the constant twitching that was happening each time she purposely pushed herself into me either. 

“She knew exactly what she was doing to you and that’s what hurt the most. I'm sorry she hurt you,” her voice whispered in my ear before she took a little bit of it in her mouth. 

“Ughh, fuck baby,” I moaned, squeezing her hips tighter and tugging her closer to me. 

“That’s what happens,” she said, brushing her breast up against me, her perky nipples grazing across my skin, making it scream.  “You let people in and they destroy you. But I won’t.” 

She sat back and looked at me, the look in her eyes nearly making me cum. She had me wound up so tight that I swallowed hard when she pushed herself into me again and her warm, shaky breath washed over my face. 

“You deserve so much more than you believe you do, Noah.” 

Slipping her hands beneath the waistband of my box-briefs, I lifted my bottom up and she slid them down my legs, tossing them aside, retaking her spot over me. 

“I’ll give you the world, if you want it,” she admitted, laying her mouth on mine and taking my lips to hers as if she owned them; she did. 

“The moon, the fucking stars. Anything you ask, it’s yours. I’m yours. You can have all of me,” she confessed through a shaky, tear filled voice. 

I pulled her way to look at her and my heart felt like it had busted through my chest. She had tears streaming down her cheeks, but the prettiest smile on her lips. I sat up and kissed her tears away tasting their saltiness. 

“I want all of it,” I admitted, brushing some hair out of her face. 

“I want all of you, but not just what you let the world see. I want all the broken, busted up parts too; the parts that make you, you. I meant it when I said I would fight the battle for you. I would, I still will. If I have you, then you have all of me too.” 

She started to cry and I pulled her into me as she laid her head on my shoulder.  I fucking loved this girl in my arms more than I ever thought possible.  More than the girl in the letter, and that scared me because there was a time when I loved her more than anything. We were both quiet for a moment, resting in the quietness of our beating hearts. I was about to finish reading the letter, when her hand slipped down and around my cock, instantly making it hard.  Slowly she ran her hand down my shaft, then back up, the grip she had applying the perfect pressure needed to stimulate what I was dying for.  I laid my head back against the couch, focusing on nothing but the feeling of what her hand was doing. The faster she went the harder her grip became and reminded me of what being inside her felt like; heaven.  I found her entrance between her wet folds and easily slipped a finger inside her tight little pussy, taking the greatest pride in hearing her moan and melt into my touch. I felt her wetness coat my fingers, as I pumped them in and out of her as she clung to me. 

“Oh, holy fuck, I need to be inside you, now.” I ordered, but it sounded more like a plea. 

She didn't hesitate to obey but instead shifted enough so that her pussy was aligned perfectly with my hard length. 

“Noah, look at me,” she commanded and I listened to her.

Her eyes were vibrant and full of something indescribable, something that I could never put into words; but I felt it and I knew she did too. 

“I fucking love you.” 

It slipped out before I could stop myself and I was scared I crossed a line.  But her smile took that feeling away immediately. It was genuinely kind and made me feel the same way I felt when I first saw her. 

“I love you too; all of you.” 

She pushed into me and took all of me and I watched her expression change as soon as I filled her. Her tight, wet walls closed in on my throbbing cock now buried deep inside her, searching for that special spot that was going to pull all the pretty cries and moans from her that I loved to hear.  I gripped her hips, sighing once she began to move slowly, with her hands placed firmly on my chest. But I wanted more and I knew she did too. 

“I want you to grind on me, baby, ride me till you're satisfied. Ride me till you cum.” 

That seemed to be all she needed. Soon I had her crying and moaning so loudly that she dug her nails deep into my skin, squeezed me tighter with her thighs, and let my name fall from her lips like a sacred prayer.  It was beautiful. She was beautiful. She pulled my hands to her small breasts, indicating to me she wanted stimulation and I all too willing obliged her.  I took each nipple between my finger and thumb, squeezing them until she cried. Once hard and perky, I dragged my tongue lazily over the soft, delicate skin, circling and lapping every part until taking it in my mouth.  Her moans pulled my orgasm closer and I knew I wasn't going to last much longer. Luckily, I didn't have too. Her hands found the back of my head, holding me in place while she fucked me slow and gently and I got her off by sucking my favorite parts of her. 

“Noah, baby,” she didn't finish her sentence, but she didn't have to. 

I looked up, grinning at the face I saw. With eyes closed, she was in perfect ecstasy. 

“Are you gonna cum for me, Princess.” 

She didn't say anything, just moaned and nodded. 

“Cum for me then baby, let it go and give us both what we want.” 

Her lips crashed into mine and our tongues danced as she came undone all over me and I quickly followed. 

It wasn't loud, it wasn't messy; it was just us, falling apart for one another together quietly. It was love making in its purest form and in that moment with her I realized the difference between straight fucking with foreplay and making love and how they were very different.  We weren’t each other's first. She had a fucked up ex and I had many experiences that left me feeling used. But what she and I had just shared had so many emotions involved, ones that I didn't even know I could feel anymore.  She pulled them out of me somehow and allowed me to willingly feel what I had buried away. They were tangled together, knotted and rooted in the dirt of my past. But, thanks to the beautiful human in my arms, for the first time in my life I felt the difference and wasn't afraid to feel them. 

She made me feel so fucking alive and I loved it. 

“Speaking in languages we can’t read, no need for you to spell it out for me/ Swallowed up and I’ spit you out, like a drug that just wouldn’t stay down”

Montana was beautiful, Noah, and the idea of visiting it with you was a dream come true. I'll never forget when you came home and told me that it was on the list of states the band was playing. Your excitement was contagious and the way your eyes sparkled and lit up your entire face will forever haunt me.  It was one of the last times we were truly happy together. Those three days haunt me, Noah. They hold the worst, but also the best memories. 

So here it goes… the whole truth.

The first show day went smoothly; you remember I'm sure. We all went out and had a small celebration in that little country bar where Folio rode the mechanical bull until he bled… like seriously bled. I thought I was going to pass out from seeing all the blood from his arm.  The day of the second show, however, was utter chaos and hell. Everyone woke up late, the venue wasn't unlocked when we got there, and some of the equipment malfunctioned. You were miserable and because you were miserable, so was everyone else. 

I tried to help, but I felt like I was only making things worse. From the moment you yelled at me in front of everyone and the things you said out of frustration, I knew things were going to be different between us. It wasn't that you yelled at me, Noah, it was what you said that was the slap to my face.  You accused me of being selfish and too self conceited and centered to understand what you were going through, and you know what? You were right. I was, I am those things. And to prove I was, I decided to get back at you in my own way; the way I regret now more than anything. 

After storming out of the venue and turning my phone off, I found a bar away from the venue, away from every memory of you. I wanted you out of my head, but mostly out of my heart because I was hurting.  So, the first guy who sat next to me and bought me a few rounds was it. He was the one I chose to make my biggest mistake with. He took me back to his hotel room, which ironically was in the same hotel as ours, you were just one floor above me. 

I was too drunk to worry about anything, not even caring if the receptionist recognized me.  Noah, I will save you the details of what I did with that man in the hotel room that night. It wasn't at all what I thought it would be, and in the end he left me hurting way more than when I started out. Not just emotionally, but physically too.  Thankfully there were no marks on my body, yet, but the bruises would show the following day. I lied and said you did them to me and the look on your face was devastating. I felt like a piece of shit. Maybe I was. No, I know I was. I should burn in hell for what I did to you Noah. You didn't deserve it.  But the worst was yet to come when the events of the night you fucked some girl who wasn't me happened and you found out I was pregnant. Nicholas said at first you were too shocked, but when it was time for me to leave the hospital, Matt said it was all you could talk about; how you were going to be a dad and how you had so much faith that the baby would be the thing to tie us back together after your actions ruined us. 

It wasn't you who ruined us, Noah, it was me, but I couldn't tell you that. Not now. Not with a baby on the way. So, I kept my silence and avoided you as much as I could, using your cheating as the excuse. And I lied to you every day up until… well you know when.  Losing the baby was never, ever the intention, Noah, that, I promise, you can believe.  I never wanted any harm to come to my baby. But when I woke up last month at seventeen weeks pregnant in a pool of blood, I knew it was over. 

The lies could stop, the truth could come out and everything would be okay. Except it wasn't, was it? Losing the baby was too hard for you. It made you do things you regret doing and I regret watching, knowing I had the power to stop it all.  I know the feeling of loss is still very raw in your heart. You're wounded and reading this letter, knowing I'm long gone, soon to be nothing but a distant memory you'd do anything to forget, is going to throw salt on that wound, but I think it's time for me to help you put your demons to rest. 

Noah, the baby…. the baby was never yours to begin with. 

I mean, honestly, think back to the first time we had sex after that fight. Think…. and you'll remember. If you don't let me help. You wore a condom, Noah and you filled it, but I lied to you and told you it broke because I was scared.  The night I spitefully killed us in every way possible was the night I conceived another man's child.  So, you see, none of it was your fault after all, Noah. It was all mine all along.  Did I feel guilt? Yes. Remorse, no. Not until now. Now that I’m walking away from you, I feel every bit of remorse possible, but it’s too late now, isn’t it.  The you I knew and loved is gone and so is the girl you knew. And that’s the difference between us, Noah. You felt remorse and it made you so vulnerable.  I hope the next girl you fall in love with is good to you. 

I hope she is never afraid of your darkness or the demons who dance in your eyes sometimes. I remember the time when you thought no one could ever love you if you revealed what lurks inside you. You’ve always been different, Noah, you know that and how could anyone understand that?  But I hope she understands and is never afraid to follow you into your darkness so that she can learn to love the beast that’s inside. I tried to, but in the end I realized that sometimes, true love comes in the form of a loving demon, or a protective monster, or even a dark angel who sits and waits patiently for you to arrive.  You are all those things Noah; and I hated you for it. 

I’m sorry I hated you, because now I know that you were the only one to ever, truly love me. 

                                    With all my love, Always, Sarah

Noah:

I woke up, flat on my back, head off the pillow, but the blanket over top of me. As my vision cleared, Sophie was nowhere to be seen. My heart started pounding, thinking maybe she regretted last night; the things we did, the things I said. Was it all too much and she felt pressured or overwhelmed? My head was starting to panic. I ran my hands over my face, trying to convince myself everything was okay, but it didn't help. I sat up, looking around for my shirt only to remember that I'd used it on Sophie, making me remember the corner I threw it in; it was still there. I needed to find Sophie and make sure everything was good between us, especially now that she knew the truth about me and Sarah. I needed to know if she was still willing to commit herself to me, to us, with this kind of baggage attached, but first I needed a shower. My stomach suddenly hurt, the anxiety nipping away on the inside and it felt like there was a giant hole in me. I needed to fill that hole. I need my girl.

[fanfics4all]

Fire and Ice

Request: Yes / No Fluffcember Day 13! 

Don’t be shy, request things! <3 Have a nice day/night

Caitlin Snow x Male!Reader 

Word count: 780

Warnings: Just cool fluff!

Y/N: Your Name 

Y/L/N: Your Last Name

Prompt(s): Fire and Ice

PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORK, I WORK HARD ON MY FICS AND IT’S NOT COOL TO STEAL SOMEONE ELSE’S WORK! 

If you want to be on the tag list for anything (My series fics, specific character fics, or just all of them) All you have to do is send me an ask and I will add you! 

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If you enjoy my work, you could also show support by buying me a coffee! 

(Not my photo, credit to whoever made it!)

*Caitlin’s POV*

I never expected to fall for anyone again, let alone someone with powers similar to Ronnie's. However, life was unpredictable, and when I met Y/N Y/L/N, a quiet, kind man with a fiery power running through his veins, my guarded heart began to melt. 

We met one night at S.T.A.R. Labs, Y/N had been hurt after helping evacuate a burning building, his burns healing quickly but leaving him exhausted. Barry brought him in and I treated him, carefully checking his injuries and listening to his story. He explained that he had the ability to control fire, and his power had developed a strange twist. He could heal others along with himself with his flames, though at the cost of exhausting himself. 

At first, we were just two metas trying to understand each other’s abilities. I shared my experiences with Killer Frost, and he listened patiently, always interested and never judgemental. It was rare for me to feel understood, and I found myself drawn to his warmth. 

Over time, we started seeing each other outside the lab. We’d meet for coffee at jitters, walk through the city’s parks, or sit by the river, talking until the sun dipped below the skyline. I was cautious, my emotions tangled and conflicted, but I couldn’t help but feel safe with Y/N. 

One snowy evening, as we walked along the waterfront, the city lights casting a soft glow over the water, Y/N took my hand. I felt the heat of his skin against mine, like a gentle ember in the cold night. My powers, reacted instinctively, cooling my skin in response. It was like a delicate dance of fire and frost. Our powers balanced each other in a way that felt oddly perfect. 

“Do you ever worry about… us?” I asked, looking at our intertwined fingers. 

“Our powers, I mean. They’re so different.” Y/N smiled, his warm eyes meeting mine. 

“I think that’s what makes it work. You bring balance. Fire can be destructive, but it can also protect, warm, and heal. And ice… ice can be beautiful, pure, and it can soothe.” He said softly. He looked down, a hint of vulnerability in his voice. 

“You make me feel like… I don’t have to burn out to help people. Like there’s another way.” My heart swelled at his words. Here was someone who saw me as both Caitlin Snow and Killer Frost, who didn’t fear her powers or see them as a burden. He saw her as a whole. 

A few weeks later, Central City was hit by a heatwave, extremely unusual for the season. Team Flash speculated that it might be caused by another meta. We quickly discovered a rogue meta manipulating the temperatures. The city was in chaos, the oppressive heat becoming dangerous. Y/N insisted on helping, despite the toll his power would take. Together, Y/N and I devised a plan to bring the temperature down. We worked in tandem, he’d absorb and redirect the excess heat, while I would channel my ice to cool the surroundings. It was a risky maneuver, one that required complete trust between us. 

We stood side by side, facing the rogue meta and the blustering heat he emitted, I glanced at Y/N. He gave me a reassuring nod, his hand finding mine, grounding me. I took a deep breath, feeling the cool energy of Killer Frost rising within me. Together, we unleashed our powers, an extraordinary display of blue ice and red fire intertwining in the air. The cold surged from me, creating a wave of frost that clashed with the flames, while Y/N absorbed the tempered in intense heat. For a moment, it was like we were one. Our powers blend in a perfect balance. 

When it was over, the meta was subdued, the heatwave dissipated, and the city was once again safe. I felt exhausted but victorious, and as I stumbled, Y/N was there to catch me. His arms were warm and steady. 

“You did it.” He whispered, holding me close. I looked up at him, my breath coming out in a puff of frost against his cheek. 

“No. We did it.” I said softly, a small smile on my lips. 

Standing amidst the melting ice and the fading embers, I knew I was in love once again. Y/N had shown me a world beyond fear and restraint, one where fire and frost could coexist, each making the other stronger. He leaned down to kiss me, his warmth melting away the last of my doubts, I knew I’d finally found the love that was like Ronnie’s.

Tag list: @les-bio-lie @tashy-bear @ashwarren32 @hollie-blogs-blog1 @lover-of-books-and-tea @nerdygaloresposts @teenwolfbitches28 @kmc1989 @drw0301bieber @lady-of-lies @ravenmoore14 @ravenempress101 @cillianchamp @rowanthomasknapp @rachelxwayne @ready-4-fanfiction @madammarvellous-blog1 @bruisedfists-and-splitlips @therealchoni 

[littlemissgeek8]

Reflection Ruesday

So there's two versions of this post game going around today, and while I did get tagged by @thedissonantverses for the one version, I figured I might as well be an overachiever and do BOTH! I will warn in advance that only one of these examples is Bioware related because I really didn't do much in the way of fanworks for Bioware games until like, last year? But hopefully someone out there appreciates it anyway! And thank you to @becausedragonage for creating this fun little idea!

Also preemptively tagging some folks b/c the bit under the cut might not be everyone's cup of tea: @hyperions-light @biowaredisasterbisexual @mageofquandrix @sandcastlekings @seaglassmelody and anyone else who has anything they want to share!

First, @woundedsoul12 wanted people to share a published work that they personally liked that they felt didn't get much love. So, I'm gonna bring around a sketch I did back in November of Darvia and Varric getting a little quiet moment during the mission to Halamshiral. I hadn't really poked my head into the fandom much at that point, so it got a bit lost in the shuffle.

And secondly, we have the usual version:

What to do: Go through your writing, art, gifs, etc. that you started but never finished and find something you love. Brush it up a bit if you want and share it. Tag me and use the tag Reflection Ruesday (it'll grow on you, I promise) and I'll comment and reblog. Then tag some other folks you think might enjoy it.

As previously stated I don't have any Bioware-related works to dredge up, but I got hit by an old special interest this week and realized I still really love the snippets from a magical-boy-inspired Ghostbusters AU from like, 2013. So, uh, if anyone feels like reading some 11-year-old writing from me, here's a little taste. Who knows, maybe I'll actually finish it someday!

Excerpt 1: Ray

The floor under my feet lurches. I look around nervously to see my friends responding the same way. Egon shoves his glasses back up his nose with a slightly unsteady finger. "It would appear that the defeat of the node guardian is having an unexpected seismic effect on this structure," he says matter-of-factly. "In English, Egon?" Peter asks. "This whole building's coming down!" I say, hoping my voice doesn't sound as nervous as I feel. The ground is growing more unsteady by the minute. "By my estimation we have less than five minutes to get out," Egon says. Winston swears. "We're on the top floor! We'll never make it down in time." "Unless..." All three sets of eyes shift to me. My hands go all clammy, and it feels like my heart's going to beat right through my chest. "Me?" I ask, my voice squeaking through my tight throat. "It's the only chance we have, Ray!" Egon's voice is urgent. "But--" I swallow and try to talk again. "I've-- I've never transported anyone but myself! And the battle took so much of my strength... I don't even know if it will work! Or even if I can get us outside of the building!" By now, the floor is buckling so much it feels like the deck of a ship during a storm. Debris from the ceiling is raining down around us. "Ray, for heaven's sake, JUST DO IT!" Peter shouts, nearly falling over. Winston grabs him and hauls him upright. I tighten my grip on the staff. It just has to work! "Hold on tight!" I yell. When I can feel three hands holding onto my coat, I raise the staff and visualize our intended destination. "Mass Shadow Transport!" The dark purple shadows swarm up around us and for a moment the bottom falls out of the world and the dark building fades into spinning purple nothingness. Then, I can hear wind. Birds. We made it outside. Winston and Peter stagger back, Peter collapsing onto the grass with a thud. Egon doesn't seem to have been bothered by the disorienting transportation, though it's always hard to tell with him. I turn to face the dark structure that we left. With a massive groan, it collapses in on itself in a shower of obsidian black rubble. My stomach lurches as I realize we would have been trapped if I'd waited any longer. With the adrenaline gone from my muscles, it's all I can do not to collapse on the grass in a quivering lump. "Admirable job," Egon says from behind me. "Yeah, thanks Ray." Winston's voice is shaky, but relieved. "Does anyone else's mouth taste like socks?" Peter asks dryly. I know he's trying to diffuse the tension, but it's not helping. I can still hear the structure collapse in my head. Peter must have noticed, since all of a sudden he's poking his head around my shoulder. "Are you all right, Ray?" Winston asks. "He looks kinda green," Peter says. "Not pretty. Your hair's the wrong color for it." "Ray?" Egon says. Just as I open my mouth to speak, my stomach heaves. I only just make it to some nearby bushes before my lunch comes up.

Excerpt 2: Peter

Dana is at her locker with her back turned. I take a deep breath and wander over, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. She looks up as I lean on the locker next to her. "Yes?" she asks. "Can I help you?" Sometime between kindergarten and now her voice has gotten deep. I'm not complaining or anything; it's kinda sexy. "Dana Barrett, right?" I ask. Not that I needed confirmation or anything, but it's a great conversation starter. "Yes." Whoops. I guess Ray was right; she almost immediately gets defensive on me. Not what I was planning on, but she hasn't shut me out completely. I decide to play my trump card now and hope that does it. "Pete Venkman. I just moved back into the area. We were in the same kindergarten class, remember?" She softens just a bit, and actually smiles. "Of course I remember you." Score! "You were the one that got sent down to the principal's office for eating glue on the second day of school." Crap! I mentally slap myself in the face. I was hoping she'd forgotten that. "They called you 'Peter the paste-eater' for about four months, right?" Mayday! This is not going well. I need something for damage control, and I need it fast. Otherwise, I'm going to end up as "Peter the paste-eater" for the rest of my LIFE! I slide in and decide to throw on the charm. "Yeah, well we all do dumb things as kids. It's a miracle we even live to see Middle School, much less High School." She chuckles. "Some more than others." Ouch. "So, you have first lunch period or second?" I ask, trying to change the subject without sounding desperate. "Second, and I need to get to class," "But the Minute Music hasn't started yet--" Right on cue, the music comes on. You know, I get that all the teachers in this school are nostalgic for the sixties, but this is the third straight day that we've had nothing but Beatles hits. You'd think they'd shake things up once in a while. Dana grabs her books and straightens up. For a moment, I catch her eyes, and I can just feel a connection-- "PETER!" --and the connection shatters like a shot-put through the neighbor's good china as Ray nearly bowls me over in his enthusiasm. "C'mon Peter! We need to get to the cafeteria so we can claim our table! Egon's got some great ideas he wants to discuss." Dana smiles. "Goodbye, Peter." She closes her locker and melts into the crowd. I'm so frustrated, it's all I can do not to throw my ridiculously heavy history textbook at that stupid speaker in the hallway that won't shut up about how it wants to "hold my haaaannd." Instead, I just push my way through the crowd and down the hall to the cafeteria, Ray right behind me and still talking. Like the overachiever he is, Egon's already gotten a table. Thanks so much for ruining my moment for nothing, Ray. I dump my books on the table and line up for food. With tray in hand, I return to my seat, sandwiched in between Winston and Ray. "How'd your meeting with Dana go?" Winston asks almost immediately. I shoot Ray a glare, then turn back to Winston. "Well, she didn't slam the locker door in my face." "She's probably saving it for the second date." Egon doesn't even look up from his notebook, and his expression never changes. Until that stone-faced mask cracks a bit with a tiny smile. As nice as it is that Spengs is showing a bit of humanity, I wish it wasn't at my expense.