#make Homer go crazy
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Haha. I posted fic. don’t read it.
#too embarrassed to tag wolfpants but seeing your wip snip and is legit the reason I’m xposting lol#took the anyone who sees this and wants to share to heart and tagging myself ig#And Ty solifuge once again in these notes#rest of the tags are dumb but leaving them for posterity#I truly pretend it’s a journal lmao#Ik the tenses are mess I don’t want to talk abt it#all exposition no dialogue#make Homer go crazy#Ik Ik all my sentences are too long and idk how punctuation works anymore it’s been too long since I had to care#my everything is too long p#aughhhb embarrassing shutting up#harry potter#draco malfoy#drarry#hp fanart#hpdm#hp fanfic#oh so embarrassed I’m in agony I am agonized how do y’all do this all the time#words are so much more vulnerable than images#to me#I deleted like 6 more long tags of yapping#this is miserable#I can’t believe some of y’all do this for fun#and now I’m doing it for fun#like a cult inductee#should I tag this as#wip#idk#if I had a nickel for every time I’d drawn Draco malfoy getting hit by a car#I’d have 2 nickels
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I need to practice drawing people again for real this time. I've had multiple Epic the Musical animatics on repeat. I have to draw these characters oh my god
#epic the musical#epic: the musical#Odysseus#homer's odyssey#the community animatics are so beautiful and full of passion and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#it is a CRIME that there's no full live musical or whatever to play out this story to these songs that I can go see in person#Or hell fucking make a whole entire 2 hour long fully animated music video movie I don't care I want it to exist#i'm crazy i'm so crazy there's too much talent it's insane
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simpsons treehouse of horror supremacy
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#the simpsons#homer simpson#mad tv#bon qui qui#no tv and no beer make homer something something#go crazy#DON'T MIND IF I DO#bortposting
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Limbus Company - Nostos Theory
For a long time I’ve been a huge fan of Greek mythology, so it was natural for me to gravitate towards Outis when my friends showed me about the game Limbus Company. But knowing by heart how her source material goes, I was skeptical about how the team would be able to translate Odysseus’ travels and make it fit in an episodic method just like how they managed to do to the other sinners.
We have so much information going on when we dive into the Odyssey, and since everything is connected through narrative, cutting a part of it for the sake of condensing the plot would make the story feel rushed or incomplete. Honestly, for a time I was scared thinking about what Project moon would do with it.
But then I remembered, Homer’s Odyssey is categorized as a Nostos - In Ancient Greek literature, it is a theme related to giving a high level of heroism for those who managed to return home, especially after dealing with myriads of mortal trials during their travels. And isn’t that exactly what Outis will accomplish once her Canto arrives?
With that in mind, I decided to reread both the Odyssey and all the cantos available until now in-game to see if maybe there was something I missed during my playthrough. You’ll never guess what I’ve found.
What if I told you that we have been going through Outis Nostos since the very beginning? I believe I have some solid evidence that all cantos up until now are following a path similar to the one written on the Odyssey. This might seem crazy, even I was skeptical of this theory at first, but knowing Project Moon there’s probably a reason why we are getting the lineup we have in Limbus Company.
So, with that said, hi! My name’s Thy, and welcome to my little insanity corner that I would like to call the Nostos theory. I hope you can read through everything without any problems, and if you have any new information that you would like to add to this, I’d be delighted to chat!
#limbus company#limbus company analysis#limbus company theory#project moon#outis lcb#outis limbus company#30 pages and 7400ish words baby
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persephone’s descent
✶ gojo satoru x persephone!reader
word count ✺ 2.7K
summary ✺ no one knows what truly happened to persephone when hades dragged her down to his realm. no one’s even heard of the demigod who made the tedious journey to save her.
warning ✺ i don’t haaate the story of hades and persephone i just hate how modern interpretations of the myth make demeter out to be a crazy woman who is “ruining” their love & hades is somehow the nicest guy who has done no wrong ever when the homeric hymn to demeter makes my heart break. i like different retellings where it is more of a love story, but in the og myth he did kidnap her & force her to stay with him against her will. im gonna shut up now otherwise i’d go on and on if i had my way lol. also like i mentioned in the poll zeus is very much NOT your father in this 👍 i hope you enjoy, please reblog/comment i’d love to hear ur thoughts!
No one ever cares about your side of the story.
The tale of Persephone and Hades has been retold and romanticized a thousand times over, and each time it strays farther and farther from the truth. It becomes a love story about Hades’ adoration of Persephone, and their fight against her crazy mother’s attempts at keeping the two star-crossed lovers apart. Persephone becomes a doting wife and the millitant queen of the Underworld. Her kidnapping turns into a misunderstanding of the love Hades has for her. Or worse, some myth retellings claim that Persephone herself tricked Hades into taking her down below to his realm.
That’s not what happened. As if you’d ever go anywhere with him willingly.
You’d never invited Naoya’s attention, not once. He wasn’t even supposed to make his ascension to the mortal realm. But he’d seen you bathing in moonlight from beneath his helm of darkness, watching as you flourish a field of irises. He’d been so taken by your beauty, eyes dragging along where moonshine reflected off of your skin. He decided then that he had to have you, and he dragged you down, down, down to his decaying realm. Away from your home, away from your mother, and away from all that you hold dear.
Demeter had sensed the loss of your presence the moment you disappeared down into the cavernous Underworld. It felt like your life had slipped away from her that day. You find out later that she had punished the Earth for your loss, as she caused crops to wither and vegetation to rot with each passing day.
You know she would have come for you herself if she could, but Zeus has long since forbidden the major Gods from acting directly against one another. Of course, being kidnapped by an Olympian God is not enough reason for him to intervene on your behalf, since you’re no major God yourself.
In your immortal life, it’s impossible to remember how much time goes by in mortal standards, and it’s even harder to keep track in the Underworld. You spend most of your hours, days, maybe even years trapped in your cave of a room. You spend every second clawing and screaming against the rock walls, making sure Naoya has not a moment of peace from you.
He is easy to anger, and you’ve caused a nasty frown to grace his face anytime he looks at you. Still, he decides that he must show off his prize to his loyal court, because how many people can say they’ve captured the Goddess of nature? He has you sit on a smaller throne beside his own as he entertains members of his court. And of course, he is always offering you food. Everything from juicy pomegranate seeds to jeweled berries to plump poultry.
Naoya must think you’re an idiot, as if you don’t know the one rule a visitor must remember when passing through the Underworld. Even to a God, the food will hold a piece of your soul hostage, as if tying you to the ground below. As a God, you don’t need food to survive, so all his obvious attempts are shot down. But you do need ambrosia and nectar from time to time, and you refuse to let him see how the deprivation of Godly food is getting to you.
You’re nursing a growing headache thanks to Naoya’s constant attention and the lack of ambrosia as you watch courtiers you hardly recognize kneel before the dais you sit on. They each have a ridiculously intricate gift for Naoya as they beg for his help with an idiotic political or social issue for their oh-so-gracious king to solve. Naoya asks for your input from time to time, not because he actually cares, but because he finds your growing annoyance hilarious.
A spirit bows in front of you on the dais. “Oh great King. I stand before you to ask you for your words of advice. You see, I have been in love with a woman for years. But it seems as though her heart has been captured by another man, and I believe she may marry him. How can I reunite with my beloved?”
Naoya taps his fingers against the bone of his throne’s armrest. “Hm. It seems you have quite the predicament. What do you think, darling dearest?”
You rub your fingers into your throbbing temple, muffling a groan of boredom. “Everyone gets their heart broken all the time. If you couldn’t tell this woman you loved her before she fell in love with the other man, maybe that’s your own fault. It’s not my problem, so why do I have to listen to your pathetic chatter?”
Naoya cackles loudly, pounding his fist against his throne’s armrest. “Aren’t you a romantic? Well, there’s your answer, lad.”
Naoya motions for the spirit to leave so that the next person can have their turn. But the spirit doesn’t budge.
“I never said she was in love with this man.”
Before you can ask what he means, the spirit throws off the raggedy cloak from his shoulders. As he does so, his form flickers until it solidifies into warm, solid flesh. You gasp. With the hood of the cloak no longer hiding the man, you instantly recognize his soft, white hair and piercing blue eyes as they meet your own.
Naoya bellows, “What is this? A live mortal in my realm? I should have you strung and castrated, so that you may truly belong here, boy.”
Gojo Satoru points a long finger at Naoya in accusation. “You will release the Goddess of nature at once, or I’ll be forced to destroy you.”
Naoya nearly falls over in laughter. “Oh, I will, will I? And who do you think you are, speaking to the God of the Underworld like that?”
Satoru straightens his back so that he appears taller, and if you didn’t know who he was you would have thought he was a God himself. “I am Gojo Satoru, son of Zeus and champion of Nike. I act on behalf of Demeter, who demands you return her daughter, or else the destruction she has caused to the world above will continue to spread down until she destroys every corner of your so-called kingdom until there is nothing left of it.”
You don’t doubt Satoru’s ability to defeat Naoya, but the God just laughs in his face. That is, until the demigod pulls out his sword. You’ve never seen this weapon of his before. It’s so sharp, you swear you can actually see it cut the air into slivers. If you could guess, the weapon looks a lot like the work of Hephaestus himself.
Satoru extends the weapon, pointing it directly at Naoya. “No? Then I will fight you and return the Goddess to her rightful home.”
Naoya steps carefully off of his throne, unsheathing his Stygian blade. It’s an impressive, obsidian sword, but it dwarfs in comparison to Satoru’s weapon.
Naoya hardly takes a step towards Satoru before the demigod has repositioned himself to the right, slashing his silver blade against the God of the Dead’s shoulder. Naoya blocks the attack, just barely. Their fight picks up after the first blow; Gojo presses his attacks forward in order to force Naoya to default to defensive blocks. Gojo’s strikes are fast and hard, constantly pushing Naoya back. He catches Naoya off guard, slashing his sword against the God’s face.
Naoya screams. “You insolent bastard. I’ll kill you for this.”
Satoru tucks his sword into its sheath. You want to scream at him to pull the damn weapon back out, but he just smirks at Naoya. “Nah, I don’t think so.”
He blasts a massive ball of electricity at Naoya, and you can taste the crackle of lightning on your tongue at the force of his power. It causes the cavernous roof above Naoya to crumble upon him. You know it won’t kill or even harm him all that much, but it will distract him for a few minutes.
Satoru leaves Naoya under the rubble to leap onto the dais. He cups his hand against your cheek and soothes his thumb across your face. “Are you alright, my rose?”
You press a shaky hand over his own. “I’m okay. Are you really here, Satoru?”
He laughs lightly, and you’ve never been happier to hear the sweet sound. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
You blink in disbelief. “Because I’ve dreamt of this every night.”
His smile sobers up into a concerned furrow of his brow, cradling your face in order to press a kiss to the top of your head. Your eyes flutter at the warmth of his lips.
“I’m here,” he promises. His larger hand presses yours against his chest, letting you feel his heartbeat. You love the speed of his heart, it’s just so unlike your own, so human. “But we really should leave before he collects himself, don’t you think, my rose?”
He takes you by your hand and pulls you deeper into the Underworld, until you stand before a tunnel that looks to lead up. Satoru ushers you ahead of him, keeping a hand at the small of your back.
“An exit?” You ask, turning to face the demigod. “How on Earth did you find this?”
He grins. “Courtesy of the Messenger God. Even the Underworld gets deliveries.”
You frown. “Hermes just…told you about this?”
“For a price” he says, winking. Your stomach flutters at his casual flirtation.
A loud roar behind you caused your heart rate to spike. It’s easy to guess that Naoya has escaped, and the shout sounds entirely too close for your comfort.
Satoru rushes ahead of you, pulling you along behind him as he leads you away from Naoya’s realm as fast as he can. He leads you further up and up, not turning back as he hastens his pace.
You stumble on the rough path, and Satoru looks back immediately, grasping you in his arms. “We can’t stop. Come, let me carry you.”
He sweeps you off your feet, and you have to clasp your arms around his neck to keep stable. You laugh into his neck as his hair tickles your cheek.
The ascension is long, but Satoru doesn’t falter once. He just holds you tighter against him. When you're out on the surface, you suck in a breath as you finally see the night sky again. Satoru lets you down gently, and you crouch down to run your fingers through the dry, cold ground until lush grass and baby blue flowers sprout beneath your fingers. Tears fall from your eyes in joy. You’re home.
You straighten out, leaping right into Satoru’s arms. Without hesitation, he lifts you and spins you around. You can’t help but laugh in pure joy. Your arms wrap around your lover’s neck, pulling him into a sweet kiss. He deepens it easily, pressing himself against you. Your hands splay over his smooth cheeks, running your fingers over the smile stretching across his face. You nuzzle your nose against his, staring into his eyes as though you might slip away again. Something crackles behind you.
You don’t need to turn to know that your mother has arrived. You can feel her presence as if you share the same heartbeat. Satoru lets go of you so that you can hug her. You nearly sob at the feeling of her warm embrace. Demeter hugs you so tightly that you think you’d choke if you needed air like a mortal. She pulls back to stare at you, cupping your chin in her hand.
“My daughter has been rightly returned,” she announces on the breeze. You know her words will carry around the Earth, until the land prospers once more.
Demeter turns to Satoru. “Thank you, son of Zeus. You will be rewarded for your bravery. I can give you jewels, or a kingdom, or the strength of a thousand men.”
Satoru shakes his head. “I have no need for any of those material desires, My Lady.”
Demeter raises a brow. Knowing your mother, she might decide to smite him on the spot. You lay a hand on her shoulder and beg, “Please, mother.”
Demeter sighs at your pouting face. She scowls at Satoru, but she makes no move to kill him as of right now, which is good news. “Fine. What is it that you want, demigod?”
Satoru kneels before the two of you, dipping his head low. You are used to this reverence of his, but it makes you blush to see him like this after so long apart. “If I may ask, Lady Demeter, for one wish, it would be for you to allow me to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage.”
Your eyes widen at the statement. Satoru’s head is bowed, and you can’t see his face. All you want right now is to see his face.
As if reading your mind, Satoru looks up at you. His eyes find yours, staring at you with love that you know your face reflects back. You want to kneel into the soft dirt in front of him. You want to touch, to hold him. You want.
Demeter hums. “Dangerous, son of Zeus, to wish for such a thing. Do you know what you’re asking me?”
Satoru’s eyes never leave yours. “Yes, I do.”
“So you know that you are a mortal, asking to marry a Goddess that will outlive you by ions, lifetimes. You know that Naoya will curse you for such mockery of his power. You will live and die painfully, and your afterlife will be full of eternal suffering. You will never see the gates of Elysium, if Naoya can help it.”
“I know,” Satoru repeats. “And I accept my fate, as long as I can spend the rest of my life at the Goddess’s feet. Even when I die a mortal death, I will love and worship her from beyond my grave, endlessly. This is the fate that I want.”
Demeter considers him, for a moment. You know your mother, and you know the exact moment she makes her decision. Tears pool in your eyes. She looks at Satoru, who is staring at you. She looks at you, staring right back at Satoru.
“I will not grant you this.” For the first time, Satoru’s attention snaps to your mother. His eyebrows quiver, and his mouth softens into a pout.
“Please,” he says softly.
She glances at you, and you turn to see the mischievous glint in her eyes. “No, I cannot fulfill this request. If you wish to marry my daughter, that is a gift she must grant you. But I will give you a gift of my own choosing.”
She holds her open palm to Satoru, and a golden apple materializes in her hand. This, you were not expecting from your mother at all. You both know what this represents. Immortality. Godhood. You stare at Satoru, and he stares up at you.
Your mother becomes impatient. “Well, son of Zeus? What will it be?”
He takes your hands in his own. “My rose. I cannot offer you a kingdom or power like Naoya can. I am a mere breath in your presence. But I can offer you my whole and true love. I can promise that I will always serve you, loyally. As your husband, and as your humble servant. Will you allow me the pleasure of marrying you?”
He barely finishes by the time you throw yourself at him, nodding emphatically and you press kisses all over his face. Your knees are dirtied by the soft ground, but you don’t care when Satoru’s entirety surrounds you. You inhale deeply, pressing your nose into his skin. He cradles your cheek in his warm palm, pulling away so that he can admire you.
“My Goddess,” he murmurs.
Demeter grumbles and you can practically hear the roll of her eyes. “Lovesick fools. Aphrodite certainly had her fun with you two.”
#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru fanfic#gojo satoru x you#gojo x reader#gojo satoru fluff#gojo satoru x y/n#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x y/n#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo fluff#satoru gojo fanfiction#jujutsu kaisen fanfiction#jjk x reader#mywriting
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a study in henry winter — henry winter x reader smut
At Francis’ country house, you and Henry get a moment to yourselves.
Tags: 18+ only minors DNI, NSFW, praise kink, slight degradation kink, very very dirty talk, all sorts of positions, taking nudes, P in V penetration
Henry Winter did not appreciate swearing. He found it undignified. However, when he slept with me, filthy words left his mouth faster than I could keep track of.
Greedy whore. Cum-loving slut. And alternatively, fucking angel.
That day at Francis’ house, we had snuck into the master bedroom, because in Henry’s opinion, “the lighting was better.” I was wearing a silk blouse that I had unbuttoned perhaps a little too low, and he couldn’t keep his hands off of me.
“Look at your tits,” he exhaled. “How am I supposed to go on?” Henry was often stoic and stern, but l was his Platonic Ideal. He worshipped me the way he worshipped Homer.
He threw me on that plush, velvet bed. Everything was lazy and slow in those days, before. He left kisses up and down my neck, and struggled at unbuttoning my blouse. I had a white lace bra on. He loved it when I wore white. When he saw the bra he rolled his eyes and flopped on the bed.
“You’re killing me, darling.” I laughed, climbed on top of him, and shrugged off my blouse. The way he looked up at me was as if he revered me. I started rolling my hips, the wool of his slacks rubbing against the twill of my skirt.
“No, no, no,” he shook his head. “Gyration is no fun clothed.”
I giggled. “Gyration?”
“You know what I mean.”
From his position lying on the bed, he unbuttoned his pants as I slipped off my skirt. “Pretty girl,” he cooed. I repositioned my hips on his, and began to move in a figure eight motion.
Henry let out a low whistle. “That’s my little slut,” he said. “Desperate to feel my cock rub against her pussy.” His words hit me at my core, and I slowly leaned down so my tits hung over his face. He brushed the lace of my bra aside and took my nipple in his mouth. I moaned, loudly. “Hush, sweetheart,” he whispered. “Francis will hear and we won’t hear the end of it for days.” He released my breast from his mouth and turned me over to lie on my back. He hung above me, and I could see the outline of his cock through his underwear.
“I know what you’re thinking,” he said, “but we have to get you wet first, don’t we?” He slipped my underwear off of my figure and rubbed his delicate finger against my clit. “You like that, don’t you? My little whore. My sweet little whore.” I moaned, signaling my desire for more. Understanding what I wanted, he shoved a finger inside me.
“Oh, look at that. My little slut is dripping wet.” He curled his finger harshly. “Yeah, you like that?” He pumped his fingers in and out of me faster and faster. I bucked my hips into his hand. “You know it drives me crazy when you do that. Makes me want to fuck you even harder than I’d planned.”
I felt my orgasm approaching, and I alerted Henry by squeezing his hand. “Oh, you’re going to come? You’re going to come, my beautiful, beautiful slut?”
I nodded and screamed. He put a hand over my mouth, stifling my breath. The orgasm came in waves, rippling over my body like the ocean. Henry always likened coming to the sea, saying the feeling of ecstasy makes us, for just a moment, return to the water from which we came. The wideness and vast beauty of the ocean.
Henry took off his boxers and his cock sprung free. I leaned down to take it in my mouth, but he pushed my head away. “As much as I would like to see you on your knees like the little cock-whore you are, I am much too impatient.” He positioned himself on top of me and slammed into me. He wasted no time going slow or easing me into it; that wasn’t Henry’s way. He threw his head back. “You feel so good. So fucking good, darling.”
He fucked me at a feverish pace, and soon he was pulling my ankle to his shoulder. I moaned and whimpered; he would never admit it, but he loved the sounds I made.
“You,” he said, kissing me deeply, “were sent from heaven to squeeze my cock with your wet little cunt.”
“Yes, yes,” I breathed. I threw my hips into his, savoring every inch of his cock and loving the way he fucked me just the way I like. He began to roll his hips methodically, knowing it would make me arch my back and moan like no one else was in the house.
“Quiet, little bird,” he whispered. “Don’t want everyone to know how good I’m fucking you.”
“Maybe you do,” I teased. “Maybe you want everyone to know what a fucking god you are in bed.”
“True, but you probably don’t want everyone to know what a greedy cock-whore you are.”
He flipped me over and pulled me by my ankles to the edge of the bed and began to fuck me from behind. The new angle was heavenly, as I felt his cock deeper and deeper in me. He grabbed my hair and shoved my head into the plush sheets. It was downright pornographic. He spanked me—hard, which I pretended to hate but secretly loved.
“Look at you, bent over for me. Dripping pussy, ready to take my cock. You’re perfect, my lovely girl.”
The moment of sweetness was unexpected, and made me feel even more intimate with him. I felt my second orgasm approaching, and I began to warn him, but he just said: “I know, sweetheart. I know. Let it out.”
I couldn’t help it; I screamed. Henry stuck two fingers in my mouth to shut me up, and put his other hand around my neck while I rode out my undoing on his cock. It was a long orgasm, no doubt to Henry’s delight.
“Yes, darling,” he whispered in my ear. “Keep coming on my cock. That’s it. I make you feel good, don’t I?”
I nodded desperately as my orgasm faded away. Henry’s pace grew faster, but then he stopped suddenly. He withdrew from me, and turned me over.
“You’re going to ride me while I come, got it?”
I nodded and got on top of him. The angle was an adjustment, and it hurt at first, but I had a perverse desire to impress him, to make him proud, even, so I started bobbing up and down. He grabbed at my tits like a cat batting at a toy.
“You look so beautiful up there,” he said. I blushed at the compliment. He started jutting his hips into mine, and I could tell he was getting close. “You ready to feel my cum drip out of you? Yeah, you fucking cum slut.”
Henry rolled his eyes back, muttered something in Latin, held my hips down and fucked me ruthlessly as he came. He groaned, lifted me off of him, and ran to get something from the dresser.
I lied on the bed, legs open, and looked quizzically at him. “What are you doing?”
He held an object in his hands: a Polaroid camera. He held the camera between my calves, angled at the cum that was surely spilling out of my pussy. “Want to remember that sight forever,” he said.
Then, he lied behind me, draped his arms around me, and we waited for the film to develop.
#the secret history#henry winter#henry winter x reader#henry winter smut#smut#henry winter fanfic#lucy writes
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Reasons why the simpsons hit and run stream is jerma's best stream
it's ELEVEN HOURS LONG
you get to witness his slow descent into madness as he insists on playing the whole game in one sitting
I can watch it when i replay the game, would recommend makes it way more enjoyable
he spends too much time doing really bad impressions trying to copy voice lines for the game and yelling "HIRE ME IM AVAILABLE"
He decides to confess half an hour in that he knows nothing about the simpsons and has only seen like one or two episodes
this is ten minutes after he references a specific episode, and then proceeds to get told off for 'spoiling' an episode of the simpsons (from like 1995) by chat
Chat also somehow manages to convince him that ten year old boy Bart Simpson's famous catchphrase from everyone's favourite family animated tv show is 'eat ass'
In general it switches between him refusing to believe things people tell him about the game despite being true and falling for obvious lies
he starts the game going 'lol wouldnt it be funny if you could run over simpsons characters' and then jokingly drives towards civillians thinking they'll jump out of the way. they go flying. he is so confused
the dissonance between early and later parts of the stream are palpable. It turns from a cheerful and lighthearted exploration of a funny simpsons game that he refuses to take seriously or accept that it could genuinely make him angry, and transforms into a desperate race against time, his computer and his own hubris as he seeks simply to finish the game so he can sleep. This stream destroys him.
the way the stream highlights are named on his youtube is hilarious. "Jerma will not get angry at the simpson's hit and run" -> "Jerma might get a bit angry at the simpson's hit and run" -> "d'oh"
it's extremely funny how many time he's convinced he's in the last level of the game, only to be wrong. the first time he thinks that is in the first section and hour of the stream
easily his most rewatchable stream (this is gonna cover a lot of dot points)
the amount of tragic irony and foreshadowing in this stream is almost cinematic.
at the very start of the game he complains about the music being too loud and monologues about sounds and over stimulation of game music bothers him, which of course will be very funny in the finale
he also comments a few time at the start about how annoying homer's random voice lines are, and says 'oh god he's gonna repeat that a thousand times before the end of this game'. he's right, and it nearly drives him crazy by the final mission
speaking of the final mission(s), the second time he has to transport the toxic sludge from power plant to the school he like pauses the game and very seriously addresses chat like 'alright tell me right now are the next three levels also me driving the nuclear waste to the school that cant be possible right'. and then just accepting in defeat that that is in fact how this incredibly stupid and difficult children's game finishes
when he first races against the malibu stacy car and gets destroyed he gets mad and says he wishes he could drive that car. then when he gets to drive it in later levels he quickly decides its his favourite and maintains that until the end of the game
on rewatch... you hear him audibly crack open a can that chat demands he prove to them is soft drink and not alcohol like A WHOLE HOUR before The Incident and it's a little like watching a disaster movie where you see the characters laughing and having fun little knowing how they are being hastened towards their own doom... like chat keeps bugging him about it, he keeps making excuses, he keeps sipping the drink. they bring attention to it so much and you listen to it just knowing the pain that is yet to come. dramatic irony at its finest and most heartache inducing
15. ohmyfucking gaaaawd no! no... god... ICANDOITINAJUMP! ..... BART. WHERE IS HE??? BAAART!!!! AAAUUGH
16. actually fr there's a lot of memorable jerma lines in this stream, rewatching it is like watching a jerma funny moment compilation
17. the final couple of levels where he is getting steadily more overwhelmed to the point of ferality, and then he says he has an idea and goes to the sound menu and turns everything off. voice lines. music. sound effects. and then we watch him play the level in complete silence. and it actually helps him focus its really funny
18. the whole tragic sequence where he is in the FINAL LEVEL. he has played it so many times and just missed it by a few seconds. he is tired. he is hungry. he just wants to get off stream and eat a BURGER. he is focussing as hard as he can. he is almost there. he runs over too many things and the police are after him. but its okay. he's doing it! he's gonna make it!!! he gets to the school with time to spare and is sucked up into the end of the game beam. it's over. except then the police get sucked into the beam as well. he gets arrested in the beam. which teleports him and the car out of the beam. WHICH MEANS THE TIMER RUNS OUT AND HE LOSES. so he has to do it all over again. it's actually so so so funny and also something i think i personally wouldn't survive if i was in jerma's position in that moment
19. okay we have to talk about The Incident. bc i already alluded to it and bc like, i couldn't not talk about it. as stated above Jerma cracks open a can so you can hear it and chat immediately accuses him of being an alcoholic. he adamantly insists that it is a soft drink not a beer but they refuse to believe him unless he proves it by showing camera. he's playing on a modded ps2 pc port or whatever of the simpsons so it's a complicated setup and he explains that it would be too hard and also he's shirtless so they will just have to believe without seeing. chat continues to harass him while he goes on to play the game, specifically most of the lisa level. he laughs it off but eventually caves, gets up and get a blanket to cover himself and then alt tabs, holds his can up to the camera and says 'alright you satisfied? that might have just fucked up the game'. so then he tries to tab back into the game and it. crashes. hard. so hard that the game won't actually turn back on. so jerma's cursing and fiddling with the controls and saying its over. then it finally reboots and the game works and he's so relieved and it loads and he realises that he has lost SO MUCH PROGRESS. he's back at the start of the lisa section. this is truly the turning point of the game where it goes from being a fun experience to a nightmare gauntlet
20. on a related note: jerma waiting with bated breath *sound of simpsons game booting back up after refusing to for far too long* jerma: yeeeAAAAAH
21. im watching it right now as i replay, which is why im thinking about it obv. so i will almost certainly have more to add to this
#jerma#obviously jerma dollhouse and so on streams are probably the most iconic but simpsons hit and run is like#wonderful in a completely unplanned way#I'm also partial to his house flipper streams#if just for the bits and being a space for jerma to create the most insane things imaginable with only the slightest prompting from chat#vaguely unrelated: when my housemate got home and saw me playing simpsons hit and run while#rewatching jerma's stream at the same time they said that think if someone analysed my brain#and exposed a different brain to my content consuming process their brain would explode#so mean....#i was also listening to one of the jay eazy megaman remixes at the same time. my awesome mind
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Why does nobody in this universe want to learn Greek like me :( making me sad, and bored, so I've made a list of all THE BENEFITS TO LEARNING GREEK:
1. The writing is really sexy. For example, even saying "you are a fish with a large forehead" looks beautiful
είσαι ένα ψάρι με μεγάλο μέτωπο
(even insulting someone is now gorgeous)
2. You could read Homer's odyssey or iliad with much less confusion since it will make more sense in the original language. Also you seem smarter reading the iliad or odyssey.
3. You seem really cool, this honestly comes with learning any new language, but Greek is connected to English, making it easier to learn, often, despite its complexity.
3. Understanding English itself will be easier since a large amount of the english language stems from Greek, as well as Latin, but Latin writing isn't quite as sexy (my own personal opinion, this is probably just because it is so similar to English, which is boring to me)
4. It is still spoken, as opposed to learning Latin, a dead language, making it easier to learn since you are more likely to have a conversation in it with somebody else.
5. The alphabet is interesting, as all foreign languages are, but the use of certain letters, how there are two different s's, three different i's and two different o's.
6. Interesting etymological origins from words. Some words came from myths, such as the man Narcissus, and particularly my favourite is when something is καλλίπυγος (Callipygious) which originated from an association with Aphrodite calling her Aphrodite Kallipygos, as well as roman reference of callipygian Venus. Callipygian means "one with/of beautiful buttocks," which I find to be quite hilariously accurate in addition to the common reference to Aphrodite in this manner.
7. If none of this enticed anybody and you dont think youll even go to greece so why bother, here are many things in Greece worth seeing:
A) THE MUSEUM IN ATHENS: multiple museums in Athens houses more history than the British Museum (that's saying a lot) with 11,000 artefacts in just the Natural Archaeological Museum in Athens alone (the British Museum has only 2,000 artefacts). Unlike many societies, they docked down much of what they did very early on so we have so much unscripted and crazy history from the Greeks alone in writing, and even moreso in their abundance of beautiful, detailed art. Even if you hate the Greeks (every country has done some bad things) it's still worth checking out the museums there just for historical knowledge and context, it will teach you a lot, i promise you that.
B) THE COASTAL WATERS: just look at the Mediterranean water, does that NOT make you want to jump in??
C) there are cats everywhere, particularly in Crete.
D) there are thousands of sites related to greek myths such as: the cave and temple of the Oracle of Delphi, which actually existed, and are still sometimes praised to Apollo today; Mount Olympus, the largest mountain in greece and worth a climb; the site where the Spartan Society thrived (my favourite society of all time, whom you should seriously check out here if you do not know already, if you do know... you should check it out also bc Weird History in yt really explains it accurately and in such a cool way).
E) greek culture. An ancient custom is to be kind to travellers, which was a belief that the traveller could be a God in disguise, so one always must treat them like a king and invite them into their home. (Again, this was an ancient custom, I'm not sure how prominent it would still be but it is a nice thought and the general public say that Greeks, particularly rural, are the loveliest people you will meet, for they have the strongest connection to this culture.) If you see blue roofs in greece this was a cultural belief as well, thought that rhat particular shade of blue would ward off evil spirits and protect the home from disease and impurity. Greece's long history of celebrated gods which are now well known worldwide through the many tales told about them and worship in their names.
If you still aren't enticed, that's okay, I am not offended, I'm just passionate I hope I didn't hurt anybody's feelings, and pls tell me if i have offended anyone who is greek themselves, because I am not greek, just heavily in love with your culture, so pls do correct me. Have a lovely day everybody :>
#greek myths#greek mythology#greek gods#greece#greek posts#greek poetry#etymology#language#greek language#homers odyssey#homeric epics
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Idk about this idea but I’ve been thinking about like- reader who’s similar quicksilver from the X-men. Like super fast, fast metabolism, ADHD to the max. Basically just the dwarves dealing with reader constant yapping and need for sweets.
Hi! Thank you for the request!
Okay, so you get a two-in-one, lol! I went a little crazy with this one and interpreted it into two scenarios.
The company reacting to the reader's ADHD craziness
How the company would react to the reader having superpowers
I also wrote a scenario yesterday about the company finding out the reader has ADHD. That felt like a prequel to this ask...it will be linked below
Thank you for such a fun idea. I hope it's okay I wrote it like this and not one scenario!💖🎉
The company reacting to reader's ADHD craziness
Balin: Just watches from afar and laughs at your shenanigans. Loves the energy you give the group, always keeping them on their toes!
Dwalin: Loves you, but every so often he needs quiet lol
Óin: Oin would send you on wild errands! He found out the hard way that boring adventures get you distracted…so the crazier, the better.
“Y/N, I asked for rosemary, and you literally came back with a bag of potatoes and a bloody nose. What did you do????”
Glóin: He just lets you do your thing. "Y/N will run out of steam at some point." Tired dad vibes…
Bifur: Bifur would gift you fidget toys! I bet he would take the time to make them for you too! How sweet 🥺
Bofur: Jam sessions/singing constantly! Due to your ADHD, you guys would switch up the genre quite a bit. It would be a total production, too!
Bombur: Would be down to go on crazy little side quests with you! You usually take him on the quests Oin gives you. Y'all would be like Merry and Pippin in LOTR
Ori: He would try to get you interested in hobbies to help keep you focused…like knitting. It doesn’t work, but you’ll still sit with him while he knits because he can keep up with your conversations and constant changing of topics.
Side note: I could not find a GIF of this exact topic...so imagine the reader is Homer and Ori is Marge trying to keep up with the conversation. Bart and Lisa are the rest of the company, lol 😂😂
Dori: Dori would be a helicopter mom! He would be scared you would get hurt, and worried other people in the company would influence your recklessness. You would basically be absorbed into their little family, lol!
Nori: Nori would team up with you to do some wild shit. He is the bad influence Dori is scared about
Thorin: Tired. Realized at this point that half the company has ADHD. Y'all ain't getting to Erebor any time soon.
Fíli: I think he would enjoy the late-night chat session! He would make sure to sleep next to you during the adventure because at least twice a night, you would wake him up and ask him random questions.
Kíli: He has ADHD, too. So, the fact that both of you have it makes me feel like Kili would see that as a deep connection—like soulmate material! I wouldn't put it past him to propose…
Bilbo: Would make you a cute little journal to write down your to-do's!
Gandalf: Gandalf would be a provoker like Nori. Imagine everyone is calming down for the night, you are all tired out, and then out of nowhere, you hear him whisper, “Psst Y/N ask Kili why he can’t grow a beard.” or “psst Y/N I heard Thorin wanted to hear about your super specific hyper fixation that takes hours to explain…(like one piece lol with all its episodes 😭).”
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How the company reacts to reader having superpowers
Balin: He can’t keep up. You are too fast, and it hurts his brain. He does appreciate the hard work you put in when there is an orc ambush.
Dwalin: He loves it! He thinks you are a strong, courageous badass. He is happy you are on their side. Will cheer you on in battle!
Óin: Tries to figure out how you do it … isn't convinced fully. Is it magic? Are you eating something?
Glóin: He blames the food or candy you were eating. He does not believe you have powers… that's all nonsense.
Bifur: Couldn't care! Like Dwalin, he is just thankful you are on their side.
Bofur: Comes up with nicknames/superhero names for you - a true fanboy, lol!
Bombur and Ori: Would think it’s magic!
Dori: Would make sure you got enough rest.
Nori: Tries to convince you to use your skills for evil, like stealing or cheating at games...maybe not evil but definitely his gain lol
Thorin: He's super excited! He wants to use your skills to help reclaim Erebor and constantly asks you to do recon.
Fíli: He's excited like his uncle, but he would want to train with you so he can keep up, lol.
Kíli: Kili would want to compete! “Come on, y/n, let's see who's faster! I know I’ll beat you.” Maybe he is a little jealous that his uncle likes you and trusts you to do recon and other cool stuff.
Bilbo: He would think you also had a “special” ring and get paranoid. He would also ask you a lot of questions to see if you know about his ring.
Gandalf: Suspicious! He doesn't believe you are from this universe. It leaves more questions than answers.
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Link to the ADHD one I was talking about above:
#the hobbit#bilbo baggins#gandalf#thorins company#thorin oakenshield#fili and kili#fili durin#kili#nori#dori#ori#bombur#bofur#bifur#gloin#oin#balin#dwalin#superhero#adhd
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Feels Like Home [02]
Summary: When an unexpected three-week break between Monza and Singapore finds Daniel back on his farm in Perth he’s desperate to use this time to clear his mind, figure out his future in Formula One, and find his way back. He didn’t expect a new neighbour, a sassy two-year old, and three alpacas would make him realise that sometimes, what you’re looking for is right in front of you.
Pairing: Daniel Ricciardo x reader (unnamed OFC)
Warnings: Language
Word count: 4.3k
AN: So... The idea was to post a new chapter every week but fuck it. It’s race week, bb’s and all the Daniel content is making me feels all sorts of things so here we are. Hope you like it ♥
Masterlist
It’s after his meeting with Blake and Michael, where they decided to decline the offers Alpine and Haas have made and Blake said he'd try to see if they can schedule another meeting with Red Bull in Singapore, that Daniel finds himself wandering around the house a little restless. He’s supposed to look at race data, promised his engineer he would before their online meeting tonight, the time difference between here and the UK meaning the meetings are always either shit early in the morning or late at night, but he doesn’t think he’ll be able to concentrate enough to take notes. Plus, he’s finished outside of the points the last four races so is there really anything else to say except that they need to improve and up their game?
He decides he’ll look at the data later and instead grabs his car keys from the kitchen island, hoping that maybe a visit to Oscar will help clear his mind. There’s something about the way his elderly neighbour always seems to know exactly what to say, always ready with some solid advice or helping him to put things into perspective, that he’s come to appreciate greatly over the years.
The drive over doesn’t take more than fifteen minutes and when he parks his truck in front of the house he catches himself looking around, looking for her. She doesn’t seem to be outside and so he makes his way to the front porch instead, where Oscar’s dog Homer greets him with an enthusiastic bark. Daniel pets his head carefully, because even though Oscar has told him time and time again Homer is all bark and no bite he’s still cautious around him. When the dog settles down again, Daniel knocks on the door, three short knocks like he always does, before he opens the door and lets himself in, “Oscar?”
“Hi Danny,” Oscar greets him from somewhere inside the house. “I’m in the living room.”
“Of course you are,” Daniel teases, toeing his sneakers off before he walks to where he can hear an old rerun of ‘The Price is Right’ playing in the background. Oscar’s sitting in his favourite chair, his right wrist sporting a cast and a nasty looking cut above his eyebrow and to hide his shock at the sight of the old man Daniel plasters a smile on his face and greets him with an enthusiastic, “Jeepers! What have you gotten yourself into, mate?”
“Took a bit of a tumble,” Oscar shoots back with a grin, holding up his wrist. “Doctor said it was one of the finer looking breaks he’s seen in his career.”
“I bet he did,” Daniel says as he sits down on the couch, leaning back and crossing his legs at the ankles. “How you holding up?”
“Good, yeah. I mean, the doctor said I have to wait until the cast comes off before I can start physical therapy and even then it can take a few months before I have full use of my hand again. And don't get me started on the hip replacement-”
Daniel chuckles, knowing exactly what it is Oscar is getting at, “Going batshit crazy already, huh?”
“Like you have no idea,” his neighbour agrees with a grin. “I mean, it’s great to have the girls here, you know, to help out and keep the farm going but if I have to watch Larry Emdur-” Oscar nods towards the TV, “-stumble over his words every day for the next six weeks, I might throw myself off a cliff.”
“There must be something else you can watch?”
“It’s this or Neighbours, Danny, and you know how I feel about Karl Kennedy.” Oscar lets out a dramatic sigh, “Nah, I’ll just have to take it, mate. It’s what you get when you’re an old cunt like me.”
“Oi,” Daniel sits up and throws Oscar a warning look, “you’re not that old.”
“I’m seventy-eight,” Oscar counters with a grin, “and I ain’t getting any younger. I just hope it won’t be too hard for-”
A cry from upstairs interrupts him and Oscar immediately reaches for his phone, smiling at Daniel apologetically. When the person on the other end picks up his message is short, “I think Ellie’s awake, sweetheart.” He stays silent for a second before he nods, “Yep. Ok. Will do.” When he ends the call he shrugs, “Doctor says I can’t walk up the stairs for a while yet, so-”
“No, yeah, sure,” Daniel says, even though he has no idea what’s going on right now.
***
You’re in the chicken coop when Granddad calls and so it doesn’t take long to get back to the house, where you kick your boots off at the back door and hurry past the kitchen and living room to the stairs, realising too late that he must have a visitor because you can hear him talking to someone. You’ll see who it is later, you figure, your priorities elsewhere for the moment.
When you walk into what is now your bedroom but used to be your grandmother's painting room you are met with two bright eyes looking up at you from over the edge of the cot you’ve set up in the corner and you can’t help but smile at the way your daughter's hair is sticking up in every direction, “Hey bub.”
She drops her stuffed Koala and stretches her arms up at you. When you lift her up from her bed she lets out a content sigh, “Momma.”
Carrying her to the changing table on one arm you pat her hair down with your free hand, “Looks like you had a good nap, huh bub?”
Ellie nods and claps her hands together when you lay her down so you can change her nappy, whispering a quiet, “Pop-Pop.”
“Yeah, we’ll go see Pop-Pop in a second, sweetheart,” you tell her as your fingers make quick work of her diaper. “Let’s get you dressed first though.”
With a clean diaper, her favourite pink sweater and a pair of dungarees that your Granddad gifted Ellie for her second birthday, together with her very own pair of Blundstones, you carry Ellie downstairs and to the living room where- “Daniel. Hi.”
Something passes over his face for just a second or so before he flashes you a big smile, “Hi. It’s good to see you again.”
You want to tell him likewise, really you do, but you think you know the look he so carefully tried to hide because it’s the look every man gives you when they find out you have a daughter, and so you’re cautiously polite, “Nice of you to come visit Granddad.”
"I always keep good on my promises," Daniel says, a sincerity to his voice that makes you relax a little. He nods to Ellie, who's eyeing him suspiciously, no doubt having picked up on your mood, "And who's this lovely lady?"
"This is my great granddaughter, Elisabeth," your granddad offers with a kind smile. "We call her Ellie."
Daniel waits until you've put Ellie in your granddad's lap, whispering a quiet, "Gentle," when you let go of her to remind her Pop-Pop is still injured, before he holds out his hand to your daughter, "Hi Ellie, I'm Daniel."
Ellie studies his face, her little eyebrows knitted together as she tries to decide whether or not she likes him, before she pats his wrist, "Danny."
Daniel lets out a quiet laugh and if you didn't know any better you'd think he sounds relieved to get her approval and maybe, just maybe, you've been too rash in your judgement of him. He scoots forward then and tugs on the pant leg of Ellie's dungarees, "I like your pants, Miss Ellie. Very stylish."
You see Ellie spot the rose tattoo on his hand, her eyes widening in awe as she reaches out and traces her finger over the lines, whispering a quiet, "Flower."
"That's right," Daniel agrees with a nod and a proud grin. "It's a rose."
"Rose," Ellie repeats back to him, looking extremely pleased with herself and you can't help but smile.
"I'm going to make Ellie her bottle," you say then, knowing your girl will get grumpy real quick if you don't get on with it. "Granddad, a cup of tea for you?" Your granddad nods and so you look at Daniel, "Daniel? Tea? Coffee?" Then, with a cheeky smile, "A beer?"
He laughs and shakes his head, "Coffee's fine, thank you."
"Coming right up," you tell them as you turn around and head to the kitchen. You catch a glimpse of yourself in the kitchen window as you're filling up the kettle and curse quietly when you see how bewildered you look and is that a leaf stuck in your hair? Great. It takes a few tries but then you finally get it out, letting your fingers run through your hair then in a futile attempt to make yourself look somewhat presentable.
Once the kettle is on and the coffee maker is running, you warm up some milk for Ellie and rummage around the fridge to see if there's any Lamingtons left over from the batch you made earlier this week. You come up empty on your first try and so you open the door of the fridge even wider and stick your head in, sure that the container must be in there somewhere.
A chuckle and a, "Are you trying to get to Narnia, or-" scare the shit out of you and you hit your head on the top shelf as you try to stand up, cursing quietly as you pull out, "Ow. Fuck."
"Oh shit," Daniel holds out his hands to you, eyes wide, "are you ok?"
You pull a face as you rub the top of your head, a little taken aback by how worried and guilty he looks, "I'm fine. I just didn't hear you come in."
"Yeah, shit, sorry," he says and runs a hand through his hair, letting it rest at the base of his neck. "I just wanted to see if you needed any help?"
"Unlike everything else around here, I think I've got this." You're not sure why you said that, don't even realise you did until you see his eyebrows knit together, but it's too late to take it back and so you give him an apologetic smile, "Sorry. That came out- I didn't-" You wave your hand around, hoping he won't push anything, "It's fine."
He doesn't say anything but instead pulls out a kitchen chair and points at it, waiting until you've sat down before he gives you a kind smile, "You just sit there, I got this."
You watch him as he walks around the kitchen with confidence, pulling three mugs from the cabinet and finding everything else he needs with ease and it's then you realise he must have been coming over more than you thought. The microwave beeps then but he seems unsure what to do with the now warm milk and looks at you with his eyebrows raised, and so you point towards the cabinet over the sink, "The bottles are in there. Once you've filled the bottle,you should test-"
"Test it on the inside of my wrist to see if it's not too warm." Daniel laughs at the surprised look you must give him and explains, "My sister has two kids."
"Gotcha," you reply with a smile. "Must be fun to have an uncle who's a world famous racecar driver."
“I hope so,” Daniel says with a sad smile. “I’m gone most of the year so I’ve missed quite a lot already but they seem to enjoy coming to the races every now and then-”
“We do what we can,” you offer with a shrug. “Right?”
He nods but then throws you a look that you’re not sure how to read, “We sure do.”
***
After about an hour or so Oscar lets out a loud yawn and Daniel takes it as his cue to leave, knowing his neighbour doesn’t let anything or anyone come between him and his afternoon naps. Daniel says goodbye to Ellie by teaching her how to fistbump and then tells Oscar he’ll come around again tomorrow, just for a chat and to save him from having to watch ‘The Price is Right’ all afternoon. When he turns towards her he finds her smiling at him with a kind smile and so he returns it, “See you tomorrow, neighbour.”
She nods in reply and then tells Ellie they’re going outside for a bit so Granddad can take his nap and they can finish feeding the chickens and clean out the shed.
He’s not sure why he hasn’t noticed it before, maybe it’s the way the light falls on her face, but she looks absolutely exhausted. He doesn’t want to hoover, doesn’t want to make her feel bad about noticing it and so he doesn’t say anything but by the time he gets into his car he thinks he knows a way he might be able to help.
The first person he calls is Michael, “Hi mate.”
“Mikey, hey,” Daniel greets his best friend as he drives onto the main road. “Listen, you know my neighbour Oscar, right?” He waits until Michael hums in reply before he continues, “Well, he fell down a couple of days ago, broke his hip and wrist, and so he needs some help. I figured maybe you could hook him up with some prepped meals? Make sure at least he’s eating right, you know?”
“Of course,” Michael agrees easily enough. “Anything he doesn’t like?”
“I don’t think so but- Could you have them make two-person portions?” Daniel isn’t sure why he says what he says next, isn’t sure why he doesn’t just tell Michael about her. Maybe it’s because he wants to keep her to himself a little longer even though she definitely isn't his to keep. Still, he adds, “Oscar’s a big eater.”
Michael chuckles, “Will do, mate. Do you want me to ask if they can deliver it to-”
“Nah, I can pick it up. Just let me know when it’s ready, ok?”
“Yep.”
“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Daniel means it when he says, “Thanks, mate.”
“No worries.”
The next call he makes is to Blake, who sounds a little rushed when he answers on the third ring, “Dan, can I call you back in like five minutes? I’m in the checkout at Woolies.”
“Yep, no worries.”
He gets the call right as he turns onto his driveway and as always, Blake cuts right to the chase, “Alright, what’s going on, mate? What do you need?”
Daniel laughs, “Can’t I just call you to hear how my best mate’s doing?”
Blake doesn’t say anything and Daniel’s sure he can feel Blake’s eye roll from all the way on the other end of the line.
“Ok, fine,” Daniel says with a grin. “Is there any way we can clear my schedule from like six to nine until we leave for Singapore?”
“I don’t think-” Blake starts but then seems to change his mind. “Why?”
“I-” Daniel hesitates, not sure why he just doesn’t tell Blake about her. In the end he tells him what he told Michael, “You know Oscar from next door?”
“Yeah-”
“Well, he fell down a few days ago, broke his hip and his wrist, so- He needs some help around the house, so I got Michael organising some prepped meals for him and I figured I might as well be there to help out a bit, you know?”
It stays quiet for a second too long and Daniel knows Blake doesn’t quite believe him and is about ready to tell him the entire story but then he hears Blake sigh and can just imagine the way he pushes his glasses up and pinches the bridge of his nose, “Fine. Just for the record, I know you’re not telling me everything here, Dan but- I trust you. So please, don’t fuck it up. I don’t want to have to explain to Zak why you’ve broken a leg dirt biking or something.”
“I won’t.”
“Ok. Give me an hour and I’ll send you your new schedule, ok?” Blake clears his throat, “We’re still keeping the morning sessions with Michael, right?”
His morning workouts run from nine until twelve so as far as Daniel’s concerned that’s fine as is, “Yep.”
“Alright, I’ll come up with something to tell the team and I’ll let you know, ok?”
“Thanks, mate.” Then, because it’s true, “I owe you one.”
Blake chuckles, “Add it to the list, mate.”
***
Ever since you got here there’s been a certain monotony to your days, where you do chores around the house in the morning, so you can keep an eye on Ellie at the same time, and then move outside after lunch, once you’ve put Ellie down for her nap. Granddad calls you whenever she wakes up, which usually is right in time for afternoon tea, and you’ve come to take her outside with you so she can play for a bit and you can do some smaller chores. After you’ve made dinner Ellie goes to bed, which frees you up to go check on the Alpacas before you’re back in the house for the dishes and whatever else needs to be done.
Saturdays are no exception and so here you are, ready to head outside with Ellie.
“Out,” Ellie says, clapping her hands in excitement. “Out, out, out.”
“Yep, let me just-” you say as you try to wriggle her foot into her rainboot, “-get these on, bub. And then we’re ready to go.” Once both feet are in you hold out your hand for her to take and lead her outside, Homer following you without question. The dog’s been retired from his working duties when your granddad sold the fifty or so cows he still had a few years ago, but he still accompanies whoever’s working on the farm whenever he feels like it.
A quick glance at the sky tells you there’s rain clouds building in the distance but you hope it will stay dry until after dinner, or at least until you’ve finished your work in the vegetable garden.
You give Ellie her own tiny spade and tell her to have at it while you set out to dig some holes for the potato plants you’ve picked up at the agrishop earlier this week.
You’re almost finished when you hear a car pulling up to the house and when you look up from where you were hunched over, trying to keep Ellie from eating yet another handful of dirt, stretching your back as you stand up straight, you’re a little surprised to see it’s Daniel. When he told you yesterday he’d come by again today you didn’t actually expect him to do so but-
“Danny!” Ellie exclaims when she spots him, pushing herself up from the ground and wobbling over to the fence.
You see Daniel’s smile grow wider when he sees her and he quickly makes his way over, holding out his fist to her once he reaches the fence, laughing then when she bumps hers against his. “Hello Miss Ellie. How are you today?”
“Tatoes!” Ellie says, pointing at the ground with a proud smile.
“We’ve planted potatoes,” you explain, using the back of your wrist to wipe the hair from your face, your hands still covered in dirt. “Well, I did,” you add and laugh when you nod at Ellie, “this little troublemaker was more interested in eating dirt.”
Daniel chuckles and winks at Ellie, “Ain’t nothing wrong with that.”
Ellie holds out her arms to him then and Daniel looks at you, only picking her up after you’ve nodded to let him know it’s ok.
“Granddad should be done with his nap,” you tell Daniel as you pick up the spade again. “So if you want to head inside-”
“Oh no, that’s ok,” Daniel says and opens the gate that leads into the garden, Ellie resting on his hip. “We can hang out here for a while, huh? Wait until momma’s finished?”
Ellie pats his cheek with one of her dirty hands, leaving a trace of mud just above his beard, whispering a quiet, “Danny.”
“Aw,” Daniel coos, a warm smile spreading across his face. He looks at you then, “So I uh- I wanted to run something by you.”
“Ok,” you draw out, not sure what he’s getting at.
“I’ve known Oscar for a long time, right? And well, he’s always helped me out whenever I needed help over at the farm so I wanted to return the favour.” He waits until you’ve stand up before he continues, “I talked to Michael, he’s my personal trainer and he does all my meal prep and-” he waves his free hand around, “Anyway, he knows someone in Perth who can help out with that and I went there today and picked up some prepped meals for you guys. They’ll last you until next Sunday and I can still pick up the next batch because I don’t leave for Singapore until next Tuesday a week from now anyway, but this way you won’t have to worry about dinner so much. You just pop them in the microwave and you have a healthy, balanced meal for you and old Oscar.”
Your first instinct is to tell him that it’s fine, that it isn’t really necessary, but honestly, not having to worry about dinner would save you so much time and so you tell him, “Thank you.”
“And-” he puts Ellie down then and runs a hand through his hair, almost as if he’s a bit unsure of himself, “-I’ve cleared my schedule in the evenings so if you want I could help you out for a bit after dinner. I know you have the alpacas to take care of and-”
You’re at a loss for words for a moment, a warm feeling spreading somewhere deep inside of you at the kindness he’s showing. If you’re honest, really honest, it’s all been a bit much and while you didn’t necessarily want to ask anyone for help, not even sure who you could ask, Daniel offering to help out for a few hours every day would make all the difference.
He must take your silence for something else because he quickly adds, “I’ll do whatever you want me to do, if it’s the dishes, or just sitting with Oscar for a bit, or-”
“Daniel,” you say, putting your hand on his arm to let him know it’s ok. “Thank you. That’s really kind of you.”
He shrugs, “It’s the least I can do.”
“It’s more than you have to,” you reply with a smile. “I really appreciate it.”
***
“Ok, so this is Barbra,” she says as she pets one of the lighter-coloured alpacas, “but we call her ‘Babs’.”
They’re out in Eagle’s Nest, the paddock bordering his dirt bike track, and she’s taken it upon herself to introduce him to the three alpacas that are huddled together near the feeder. She nods, encouraging him to pet the animal but he’s- Hesitant. Babs looks very innocent, all long eyelashes and fluffy hair but he’s sure a well-aimed kick could take him out in seconds and so he prefers to keep his distance.
She laughs and grabs his wrist, “Come on, you drive fast cars for a living, Ricciardo. Don’t tell me you’re scared of an Alpaca.”
“I’m not scared but there ain’t nothing wrong with being cautious,” he shoots back but his voice is a little too high-pitched to make it sound convincing. He flinches when she guides his hand closer to Babs but when she makes him touch her fur and he feels how soft the wool is he relaxes a little.
She laughs and lets go of his wrist, “See? That isn’t so bad, is it?”
“Hmm,” he agrees half-heartedly, not wanting to spook the animal. “It’s ok.”
“It’s Betsy you gotta look out for anyway,” she says with a nod towards a dark-brown alpaca, a mischievous smile tugging on her lips. “She tends to bite when you get too close.”
“Good to know,” he says, still keeping his voice low, still stroking Babs’ back. “And who’s that?”
She holds her hand out to a white alpaca, the animal immediately going in for a head scratch, “This is Blanche. She wouldn’t hurt a fly.” She turns to him then and whispers, “She ain’t the brightest of the bunch, most of the time the light’s on but there’s nobody home, if you know what I mean, but we love her just the same.”
He laughs, “Gotcha.”
“Ok, so,” she opens the gate and allows him to step inside before she closes it again, telling Homer, who has come along in the back of her ute, to stay. “We’ve got their feeder here but I keep a bucket of grains in the back of my ute to keep the mice out and once every two days or so I bring them a fresh bail of hay.” She motions towards the shed a little bit further down, “They can seek shelter there at night and tend to huddle up whenever it rains, so I make sure to clean it out every day so it’s a nice place for them to be.”
He nods, trying to pay attention but he’s too distracted by the way she keeps touching his arm whenever she shows him something and finds himself wishing she wouldn’t let go. When she’s done with her tour of the alpaca paddock she looks at him expectantly and he can’t help but smile back at her.
She wiggles her eyebrows at him, “You sure you still want to help out?”
Daniel has never been more certain of anything in his life, “Yes ma’am.”
#Daniel Ricciardo#F1 Fanfic#Daniel Ricciardo x reader#F1 Imagine#DR3#Harley Sunday x Daniel Ricciardo#Feels Like Home
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I played Hades II a fair bit yesterday during my breaks and free time for Supergiant Games' technical test of the game. Part of me wants to keep playing today, but I got stuff to do and I do want to keep up the excitement for the early access. I wrote a rough, kind of unedited essay about it before I went to sleep last night though below, mostly for me to have record of my memories in written form. Some spoiler-y screenshots and random thoughts/analyses below if you want to read more. I mean it--there are spoilers and the most random long tangents because I like to analyze. (I do recommend playing first if you have a chance to)
First thing I'll say is that the game is pretty phenomenal and so damn fun. The experience reminds me of when I played Hades for the first time in their initial Early Access of the game years ago. Longtime Supergiant Games fan here (since Transistor release)! I remember running into a bug then and reporting it when I froze in-game, but I have not run into any noticeable bugs at all yet for Hades II. I've done some reports for minor bugs, but extremely minor ones that I actually feel bad for even reporting and adding to their list of messages to go through. Supergiant has their QA down, truly. I have so much respect for them and how they've developed the game. Darren Korb did an amazing job on the music again. It has that iconic Hades sound with the strings (that is not a guitar, I forget what it's called) while also being its own distinct soundtrack.
The 4th wall banter moments between Melinoë and Homer (who is revealed as narrator!) have been one of my favorite things about the story/narration execution. Her being cognizant of Homer does make it so there are rather funny moments, but also brings up the question of how that might shape the narrative later on. I'm so curious!
When I first started the game, I had a funny moment where I died almost instantly in the second room because I was testing out Melinoe's skillset and ran out of MP (?) and then got slapped because I wasn't actually doing damage when trying to use her bigger skills, heh. It did take me some time to get used to it, but Mel's skills and cast abilities are so much fun to use when utilized well. Her cast and its ability to hold your enemies for a time is one of the best upgrades to combat, in my opinion. For all I love the first Hades, I remember having to dash like crazy to escape exploding carts coming after me if I didn't have a good boon to mitigate or avoid that. With the cast for Melinoë, it'll change that to placing strategically some casts that can hold quick enemies or enemies that are very dangerous if they get close to you (wailers in this game are one such enemy). In terms of boons, Demeter's, Hestia's, and Apollo's have been some of my favorites. Aphrodite also has a phenomenal one for casts that will gather your enemies into your cast, making it an ideal combination with some devastating other boons that can easily damage groups of enemies all at once. Hephaestus also has a pretty fun one where I think he can explode in a certain proximity with your special or attack, I forget. I do wonder if they'll have to rebalance some of these boons because there are certain ones I can annihilate enemies with--but then again, maybe that is needed for later sections of the game.
The numerous references to the moon in the game are a nice nod to Melinoë's lore in Greek mythology and poetry too. Though she's more associated with being a goddess of ghosts (I find it a nice touch you can salute shades you meet in the Crossroads because of this) and nightmares (I don't think it's a coincidence Hypnos is the only other survivor of Hades' inner sanctum), Melinoë has at some point been referenced as a moon goddess as well of the underworld. Selene is the moon goddess and Artemis has also become known as a goddess of the moon in mythology in addition to being the goddess of the hunt. So that connection between the three and the friendship they share in the game is pretty cool in that regard (Selene calls you the "Silver Sisters.")
Having Artemis become your friend in Hades II, something akin to a friendly rivalry like Thanatos was to Zagreus, is such a fun story--and then you have Selene added into that mix as well. From the few runs I've done, I've gathered that Artemis and Hermes are the first of the Olympus gods who knew of Melinoë's existence in her youth as Hecate's pupil. She helped Hecate hide the truth of Melinoës survival (at least from the Olympus gods)--and when Melinoë was ready, it was only then that Artemis leaked through Apollo that Hades' daughter was coming to fight Chronos and had survived the fall of Hades. So the boons you get are because the twins, Artemis and Apollo, played a role in connecting you to Olympus for the fight against Chronos. There seems to be more in this background that I'm curious to learn about. Just from their banter, it's clear Artemis has spent much time with Melinoë and Selene in some form. I don't know if they have duo boons in this game (or boon-hex? Selene gives you a hex), but I'm curious to see what these two's duo boon(s) would be if they have them.
The game also does that thing the first game did so well of shifting the world as you progress and have changes in the relationships about you. Nemesis is one of the new characters in Hades II who doesn't seem to like you very much initially, but with your dialogue with Odysseus nearby, you get the sense that it wasn't always this way. When you gift her a nectar, Melinoë subtly starts calling her "Nem," and you can tell the two of them are very slowly mending whatever it is they have (Odysseus chuckles nearby probably seeing the progress). You also meet Doom Incarnate (Moros) and have to unlock having him at the Crossroads by invoking him, which is also pretty fun in terms of letting you slowly do more runs and experience the world more in order to gather enough "resources" to call him. It allows a natural progression of characterization and getting to know the people around Melinoë, in my opinion.
Dora's also one of my favorite character already. There's something so funny about Melinoë encouraging Dora as she tries to scare and haunt her as a proper ghost, but then also rather touching that she just accepts that Dora just likes to hang out in her room and not go out much. I love Arachne too, and how she's just chillin' like, I'm bored and alone and just spinning webs, so here Melinoë, have some clothes I made.
This game makes me love it as much as I loved the first one. In some ways, in terms of how they executed establishing background and connections between Melinoë and her companions (Odysseus' calls her a "little goddess" as a child! Hecate plays hide-and-go-seek with her!), I think they've started out much stronger than they did in the first game. And this one already starts with a sort of high-stakes situation from the get-go. Melinoë's entire family has been taken by Chronos and she grew up apart from them. The game does well of letting you step into the world even if you haven't played the first one--and playing on your affection for Hades, Persephone, and Zagreus if you did. After all, considering how hard you worked as Zagreus to bring back together that family in the first game, the second game logically comes back with a vengeance with Melinoë at the loss of such a family and a need for vengeance against Chronos for ruining it. The world feels familiar, yet the cast of characters are so different.
And the designs of all the new gods! And the new designs for the old gods! They're all extremely well-done. I've been a longtime fan of the artists for the characters and the environments. They've done stellar jobs on it again for this one, and there's more touches to icons and designs of the UI I like too. The dialogue log is one of my favorite things too, as someone who might miss a piece of dialogue here and there when I take off my headphones. The voice acting in this game is also a whole notch up from the previous game. Not to knock anyone from the first Hades, since I think they did a great job, but I do feel like the voices have been more professionally recorded this time around. Or something about it is a little more polished. Kudos to Supergiant for another game that's an A+ in my book thus far. Ahh!
I could keep going, but honestly, I think it's best to have people experience the game in Early Access. I mostly just wanted a record for myself to look back on for being a small part of Hades II's journey and share some of my excitement and the random analyses I had. It'll be fun for me to look back on how I read some things and how I felt when the finished version of the game comes out eventually.
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one time I was on call with some of my lotf friends looking at lotf fanart and low and behold, i saw YOUR blog. It was like an autism crossover event. Like, woah... my favorite hetalia fanartist.... was a lord of the flies fan.....
first of all IM YOUR FAVORITE HETALIA FAN ARTIST... WAOW THANK YEWW TF THATS CRAZY 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 second. Im going to be so fr i was a lotf fan when I was 13 and it was bc i was obsessed with that roger x maurice yaoi. and it was rogice i was making up random shit for and just hoping other people would accept. one of my biggest inspirations was the only person on fanfiction dot net who wrote rogice but not weirdly gay and had this series where maurice forced roger to celebrate a different national holiday every day and one chapter was world aids day and maurice was like "erm.... im not sure if we should celebrate this 😅 heh gomennnnnnn!". and all their fics were funny as shit like this except their one fic that was insanely serious and insanely long. and in it roger was a serial killer who stole peoples eyes and maurice was like yknow what yeah lets go along with this and then when maurice died roger put his eyes in a special bag. and this long ass homer poem was just randomly between ten thousand normal short one shots. anyways yeah i guess you could say i used to like lord of the flies im normal about it now and tbh im more crazy about the great gatsby bc i yumeship with gatsby on the downlow but thats a whole nother thing. and i am much more serious about yumeshipping with boo radley from to kill a mocking bird but i lowkey didnt care for the book even through i had to analyze it for class twice and the only thing that got me through it was lusting over boo radley so i wouldn't lose focus...... stockholm syndrome?
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Hi! I haven't had the chance to read the Iliad or the Odyssey but I want to draw an illustration with Odysseus, Penelope, Agamemnon, Clytemnestra, Menelaus, and Helen. I want to try to potray them as close as in the books. Are there descriptions in the books of how they look like?
*cracks my knuckles*
So I'm going to preface this with...
While yes, there are some characteristics listed, you can (and should!) have fun and kind of go a lil crazy :3 Also that I'm no expert and simply a silly goose.
There are many MANY "designs" that can and DO "fit"! For example, one of my dear friends has her Penelope with auburn hair and her Odysseus with black hair while I have that switched! (My Odysseus with Auburn and Penelope with black hair) Many people have Odysseus short while I have him taller. I have my Penelope very smol and my Helen is a chubby 6'4 woman.
That's something that is so fun about these myths! :D So many interpretations and so many that are still "correct"! :)
(Also folks who have better knowledge and/or something to add, please feel free to! :D )
BUT!!! I get where you're coming from in trying to get "as canon as possible" as I try to do that too so I'll do what I can. :3 If you're curious about the BEAUTY STANDARDS of Minoan/Mycenaean Greece, that's a different matter. (I don't mind making a separate thing for that with the sources I have as well)
And honestly? For the Women, (Penelope, Helen, Clytemnestra, etc.) There really isn't like, ANY description of them. At least not specifics other than beautiful.
I think what you DO need to keep in mind for the gals, is like, what their heritage is and then base on that. What do you think of when you think of Zeus and how he looks? Possibly keep that in mind when designing Helen (and Pollux). With Clytemnestra, her and Helen share a mom but have different dads, so keep that in mind.
Penelope is, in the most straight forward myths, is at least half Naiad (freshwater nymph) and even be 75% naiad! Her mother being Periboea, a naiad herself, and her dad, Icarius, being half-nymph in some myths! :D
Now to the guys who DO have some canon stuff. (btw, this is from what I remember on the top of my head with the evidence I can find/remember)
First off, Achaeans are usually given the epithet of "Long-haired", as that was kind of the beauty standard :)
I'll do Agamemnon first.
"who’s that large man, over there, that impressive, strong Achaean? Others may be taller by a head than him, but I’ve never seen with my own eyes, such a striking man, so noble, so like a king" (Book 3, Johnston)
He is implied to be tall but not as broad as Menelaus and Odysseus. But definitely still is strong in his own right. His hair color I don't think is ever described but I'm pretty sure he's described with a dark beard at one point.
For Menelaus:
(sorry but his descriptions are often squished in between other stuff, and I don't wanna sift through it all)
He is often described with either "fair-hair" or "flaming-hair". So most likely blond or ginger. He is taller than Odysseus as well but it sounds like, maybe a tiny bit shorter (or same height) as Agamemnon. He is more described with a broader body in general. (I guess a good reference could be a professional wrestler? I love kind of imagining him, while not as imposing and large as Greater Ajax, he is like a "brick of a man" in how you'd try to rush at him and push him and you couldn't.)
For Odysseus:
Homer doesn't shut up about how ripped this man is tbh lol.
Dear child, come tell me who this man is, shorter by a head than Agamemnon, son of Atreus. But he looks broader in his chest and shoulders. His armour’s stacked there on the fertile earth, but he strides on, marching through men’s ranks just like a ram moving through large white multitudes of sheep. Yes, a woolly ram, that’s what he seems to me.” (Book 3, Johnston)
"She withered the smooth skin on his supple limbs, robbed his head of its auburn locks [...]" (Book 13, Rieu)
"The bushy locks to hang from his head thick as the petals of hyacinth in bloom" (Book 23, Rieu)
"Fine thighs" etc. I think you get the point. He's got a broad chest and shoulders, strong af legs, he gives the vibe of being very toned, probably almost like a "Greek God" as he does have the Epithet of "Godlike". While his hair color can really be anything, He ALWAYS has thick curls (the hyacinth and ram comparison) which was the beauty standard of the time.
For clothes!
This was the Minoan/Mycenaean style for the most part! :D I recommend researching on your own as well but here's some examples! (Feel free to make adjustments in some ways (I know that not everyone is comfortable drawing breasts and that's okay.))
For Men's fashion:
(This is a Boar Tusk Helmet! :3 Many warriors wore but Odysseus specifically did in the Iliad and is commonly depicted with one!)
I hope this helps!!!
#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#Sorry this took a bit but I wanted to skim and had other shit going on too :)#shafeeyaart#ask#essay#odyssey#minoan#mycenaean
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BOOK II | HOMER'S ODYSSEY | LITERATURE REVIEW
SUMMARY: Telemachus addresses the suitors that plague his mother and his house, but they do not see reason. Praying to Athena, he makes preparations to leave Ithaca for Pylos in search of his father.
previous book / all books / next book
OKIE. so the first thing that caught my eye in Book II is that when Telemachus is going around to gather the assembly and address the suitors, he goes with his dogs:
"Then, when they were got together, he went to the place of assembly spear in hand- not alone, for his two hounds went with him."
people who know the ending of the Odyssey will remember that by the time Odysseus actually does show up, only his faithful dog Argus recognises him. so, there seems to be this recurring motif of dogs as a representation of loyalty, which is a super important theme throughout the book.
i also think that the parallels of Odysseus with his dog and now Telemachus with these two dogs emphasises how similar father and son are.
in Book I, we had begun to see the growth of Telemachus' character, being moody and irate at the start, but slowly more calm and dignified and commanding. in the second book, this is re-established:
"... all marveled at him as he went by, and when he took his place in his father's seat even the oldest councilors made way for him."
interestingly, i find that the constant descriptions of Telemachus ascending to "his father's seat" sorta sets up the idea that Odysseus is never coming back. if i didn't know the story myself, i would've thought perhaps this is Telemachus becoming The Head of the Household for real, not as a placeholder, not just keeping the seat warm, but officially. it would've been crazy to live in Ancient Greece and hear the Odyssey for the first time tbh!
at the assembly, Telemachus gets mad about the suitors hanging around his house and drinking all the wine, and he gets so passionate about it that:
"With this, Telemachus dashed his staff to the ground and burst into tears."
i like this description because, it isn't simply duty and fate that compels Telemachus to address the suitors. this is his house, the house he was born in, the house he was raised in... it's his mother that these men are fighting for, in front of him... in his father's house... that father who was first dragged off to the war because he couldn't bear to feign indifference long enough for infant Telemachus to be run over by oxen. did Telemachus know how Odysseus got recruited? i don't know. i'm not sure if it gets revealed.. but an interesting thought there.
anyways. i'm trying to say here that Telemachus is motivated emotionally.
now, most people who are sensible hear Telemachus' plea and sit quietly. EXCEPT, Antinous who gets mad about it, and gives us our first real insight into Penelope as a character.
"It is your mother's fault... 'Sweet hearts,' said she, 'Odysseus is indeed dead, still do not press me to marry immediately, wait- for I would not have my still in needlework perish unrecorded- till I have completed a pall for [my father-in-law] Laertes. ... but at night, she would unpick the stitches again by torchlight. She fooled us in this way for three years..."
SparkNotes has this great line, "If the Iliad is about strength, the Odyssey is about cunning."
i think that is SO true. in every interaction Telemachus and Penelope have with others, it is always about their eloquence, the way they speak, their schemes.
here, we realise that Penelope has artfully been undoing her stitches at night so it seems her progress on the pall has been extremely slow. it shows that she is an intelligent woman, and it shows her loyalty.
she says "Odysseus is indeed dead", but that may not reflect what her heart truly thinks. she had, in Book I, stopped the bard from singing about the war because it reminded her of Odysseus, and in her action of undoing the stitches, she procrastinates on moving on from her husband. because to move on and marry again is to affirm that Odysseus is dead. but as long as she waits, there's a chance that he'll come home.
an interesting parallel is that, in the Iliad, Odysseus uses cunning to "do action"... sabotaging the Trojans, etc. but here, Penelope uses cunning to avoid taking action, i.e., marrying again. and for their respective contexts, both taking and abstaining from action is a good thing and a sign of their quality (source).
Antinous further compares Penelope to previous legendary women, saying that she is unlike all of them:
"We never yet heard of such a woman; we know all about Tyro, Alcmene, Mycene... but they were nothing to your mother..."
as characters, only Alcmene seems to share any good traits with Penelope-- beauty, wisdom, loyalty. but Tyro is not particularly smart and certainly not loyal, and Mycene, well... there's not much lore about her anyways. so this passage sort of confused me, but a different version of the book elaborates on the comparison:
"...those who long ago were fair-tressed Achaean women- Tyro, Alcmene, Mycene..." (the Odyssey, Book II, Lines 119-20)
and here, i think it makes it more clear that Antinous is comparing Penelope's beauty with these previous women, but emphasising that unlike these women, Penelope is both beautiful AND shrewd!
i like the line because it's essentially awarding Penelope legendary-status and it's only Book 2!
now, there's some more arguing and then, of course, some portents:
"As [Telemachus] spoke, Zeus sent two eagles... they wheeled and circled about... glaring death into the eyes of them that were below."
now Telemachus has been blessed not only by Athena but by Zeus too. Halitherses, a prophet, confirms this and also says:
"I said that after going through much hardship and losing all his men, he should come home again in the twentieth year and that no one would know him..."
we learn in this passage that Odysseus' journey has been FORETOLD. everybody has already been told that Odysseus will be away for agessss but no one believes. i would say it's foreshadowing, but it's not really... we are explicitly being told that Odysseus will come home.
this makes Telemachus' mission all the more urgent... he absolutely must get rid of the suitors.
of course, the suitors are too stupid to take note, and they promise Telemachus:
"You may preach as you please... We shall go back and continue to eat up Telemachus' estate without paying him..."
this is said in direct defiance of the previous eagle omens sent by Zeus. Zeus is the god of xenia; hospitality. Xenia is not a one-way street... it is not simply that the master of the house should care for his guests, but that the guests must also be respectful and considerate of the master.
here, Telemachus has given food, much more than he ever needed to, but the suitors (the guests) have made a mess of his house. they violate xenia and Zeus' portents confirm his displeasure with the suitors. this is foreshadowing that they will receive their comeuppance soon.
however, at present, Telemachus' failure to actively get a grip on things with the suitors is an indicator that he still in the progress of becoming a man... he is still working his way towards being the Master of the House-- he doesn't yet have that total control.
Telemachus doesn't argue back with them, but instead makes preparations to travel to Sparta and Pylos looking for his dad.
then, we are treated to a really awesome scene of Telemachus praying to Athena:
"Then, Telemachus went all alone by the seaside, washed his hands in the gray waves, and prayed to Athena."
now, consider for a moment, what Odysseus does in the Iliad:
"...at the ships of the Achaeans... [Athena] found Odysseus... standing alone." (Book 2, the Iliad)
BOTH father and son go to the seaside to be alone in their thoughts. however, where Athena went to Odysseus, Telemachus is the one praying to Athena. and of course, Athena visits both of them.
to Telemachus, Athena, in the guise of Mentor, advises him:
"But mind you never make common cause with any of those foolish suitors..." (Book 2, the Odyssey)
and literally a paragraph or so later, Antinous, that creep of a suitor from before who argued with Telemachus says to him:
"Telemachus, my fine fire-eater, bear no more ill blood neither in word nor deed, but eat with us as you used to do. The Achaeans will supply you with everything- a ship and a picked crew to boot- so that you can set sail for Pylos at once and get news of your noble father."
it seems an honourable offer. there'll be no more fighting, AND Antinous promises a ship to bring Odysseus back... good right? but this is exactly the sort of temptation Athena warns Telemachus against! because if Telemachus dines with the suitors, he will become dishonourable like them. and luckily, Telemachus heeds Athena's warning and refuses.
the ship prepped, Telemachus boards it as the captain, and Athena joins his crew herself as the pilot.
she puts the suitors into a deep sleep which is important because if they are awake, they might try to prevent Telemachus' departure.
the book ends on a good note; the crew give thanks to the gods, especially Athena, unaware that she has joined their crew, which is surely a sign that they their journey will go at least a little bit better than Odysseus'.
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