#tomorrow is going to stress me out so much

[charliegyrth]

Hangry

Before

I slammed the door behind me.

“Aiden? You okay?” my husband called from the other room. I could hear video game music in the background. He was playing Mario Kart again.

Course he was. He still hadn’t taken out the trash. His dirty lunch plate was in the sink. His shoes were in the middle of the room instead of neatly in the rack.

I know this doesn’t sound like much, but after a long, long day at work, I expected my work-from-home husband to clean up a little bit before he started playing freaking Mario Kart.

The game music switched off and Greg entered the living room. He was in sweatpants and no shirt, giving me a nice view of his lean, hairy body. I wasn’t turned on by his shirtlessness, though. Not in the moment. Instead, seeing him like that, while I was stuffed in my work clothes and choking on my tie, just made me more frustrated.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said, ignoring his offer for a hug and plopping onto the couch. I loosened my tie and unbuttoned my shirt, which gave me a bit of relief.

I always chose work clothes that were slightly too tight. That way, I could show off my muscular frame and exude a sense of power in the office. It worked (two promotions in the last year), but it left me feeling uncomfortable and constricted for most of the day.

Greg sat beside me and supportively rubbed my shoulder. “Hard day at work?”

“It was fine!” I snapped at him. (It wasn’t fine, of course. Greg should’ve known me well enough to figure out when I didn’t want to talk about work.)

“Well, I had a good day,” Greg tried to fill the silence. “Beth came over with the kids. They just did their karate test thing. Orange belts, now.”

He went off on some long story about his nephews, but I wasn’t paying attention. I kept thinking about work, about Mr. Johnson interrupting my lunch so he could give me even more responsibilities while my worthless coworker was on maternity leave.

Eventually, Greg stopped talking. I guess his story was over. He looked at me for a long time, his eyes filled with sadness. “Aiden, I think we need to talk.”

“Isn’t that what we’re doing?”

He pulled away from me. “You’re so angry all the time.”

“What?”

“Look, I love you. I’ll always love you. But… You’re not fun anymore. Before, I used to be so excited when you came home from work. Now, you’re like an incoming storm cloud. I know you’re stressed, and the house is a little messy right now. Sorry about that. But do you have to be so… mean?”

My heart broke.

Greg was right. I was mean. I was angry at the world, angry at life, and I took my frustrations out on the one person I loved most.

“I’m sorry.”

“Is there something I need to change about myself?” he asked. “Am I the problem?”

“No! Of course not.”

“So what is it? How can we fix this?”

I had zero answers to the second question and so many answers to the first. Work sucked. I was struggling with time management. I had no energy anymore. I spent so much time either at the office or at the gym that I didn’t have any time to just relax.

But I didn’t want to unload all that on Greg. Saying that stuff out loud would just get me angry again. I eventually said, “I don’t know. I had to skip lunch today. I guess I’m hangry.”

“Well, it’s not just today. Do you skip lunch a lot?”

“Honestly, yeah.”

“Okay, well, let’s get some food inside you. I’ll order something.” He pulled out his phone. “Thai?”

“Sure.”

Greg was trying to help. God bless him for it. Ordering an early dinner would help me relax a bit, but it wouldn’t solve the underlying problems. It would be a small band-aid on a bleeding wound. Tomorrow, I’d just turn into a ball of anger again.

Unless I changed my ways. Unless I figured out a way to control my emotions. Because yeah, I had a problem. And I knew that if my life kept going in the same direction, eventually I’d push Greg away forever.

And I didn’t want that.

Maybe I could try seeing a therapist.

“Ordered!” Greg announced. He put his phone away. “It’ll be about forty minutes. Let me get something to tide you over in the meantime.” He hurried into the kitchen.

As I sat on the couch, thinking about all the completely justified reasons why Greg had called me mean, I stripped off my shirt completely. That felt good.

Greg came back with a bag of potato chips we kept in case people came over. He placed it in my lap. I wasn’t the biggest fan of chips (they were more Greg’s thing), but I figured why not?

I popped a couple in my mouth and felt instant relief at the shock of saltiness. I guess I was hungrier than I realized. “These are good.”

“I know.”

As I munched on the chips, I finally told Greg about my workplace frustrations. I just let it all come out.

Greg listened, glad that I was finally opening up.

“And then Sadie, in accounting… It’s like, how many kids is she going to have? Like, I get it. You’re Mormon. And I’m all for maternity leave or whatever. But why I am always…” I stopped. My hand dug around the chip bag and felt only crumbs.

Had I eaten that entire thing? Yeah, I guess I had.

“Feel better?” Greg asked.

“Yeah.” Both because of the satisfied fullness, and because of the venting.

The doorbell rang. Our Thai food had arrived. I wasn’t starving anymore, but I knew that it wasn’t healthy to eat potato chips instead of an actual meal. I got up to answer the door... Until Greg pushed me back down.

“I got it, honey.”

He thanked the delivery guy and came back with three bulging bags of food.

“Is that all for us?”

“No. We’re going to walk around the neighborhood and pass out rice congee to all our neighbors.” He set the bags down in front of me and pulled out container after container of delicious-looking entrees.

“Why did you…?”

“I didn’t realize you were starving yourself so much at work,” he said. “That’s not healthy. I figured… you know. You needed this.”

I loved Greg so much, and I hated myself for losing sight of that.

I didn’t really know the names of all the dishes we were eating, so Greg explained each one as I sampled. (He spent a year in Thailand before we met.) Once I had a little bit of everything, he asked me what my favorite was.

“Honestly, they’re all good. Very saucy.”

“Then have some more.”

So I did. I ate with utter abandon while Greg retold his nephews’ karate story. It was such a wonderful conversation, and my taste buds were sparking on my tongue, that I didn’t realize how much I’d eaten until I felt my stomach throb.

I stopped.

Greg looked at me with both pride and happiness. He wiped a trail of curry off my chin. “Don’t you feel so much better after a good meal?”

“I ate too much.”

He placed his hand on my distended stomach and gave it a supportive pat. “I can see that.”

I looked at the empty containers covering the table. There was still some food left, but most of it was gone. Greg had eaten some, of course. But I managed to consume more food than I ever had before. I’d feel embarrassed if my entire body didn’t feel so satisfied. Painfully packed, but satisfied. There was not a single twinge of anger inside me.

Neither of us said anything for a while. Greg had started rubbing circles on my stomach, which felt incredible.

“Okay,” he said. “Well, it looks like we fixed your hangriness.” That wasn’t a word. “So from now on, Aiden, stop starving yourself, okay? If you start feeling frustrated again, just… pop in a snack. Okay? We’ll both be happier.”

I felt too good to argue. “Okay.”

“I’ll make sure to have more substantial dinners waiting for you when you get home,” he said. “And the next time your boss calls you into a meeting during lunch, tell him no. I’m pretty sure that’s illegal.”

“Maybe.”

He smiled. “I like you so much better like this, Aiden. Full and happy.”

***

After

Greg walked through the front door and kicked off his shoes.

“Another long day?” I asked from the couch.

“It was fine,” he said. “Just happy to get home to my big man.” He walked over, sidestepping the piles of take-out boxes on the floor, and kissed me. “Have you been productive?”

“Heck yeah!” I answered proudly. “Finished both cheesecakes! And the leftover fettucine.”

“That’s my guy.”

I did some work, too. I led a couple Zoom meetings with my coworkers and filled out their schedules. But I didn’t tell him about all that. Wasn’t important.

Once I got my last promotion and moved up to an entirely supervisory role, I was able to start working from home full-time. That was around the time I passed 300, still pretty mobile but definitely struggling to rush around the office the way I used to.

Ironically, that was the same time Greg had gotten his new job at the library. For the first time since we’d gotten married, he was the one working outside of the house, and he loved it just as much as I loved staying in.

Greg walked over, looking particularly handsome in his new vest. His hands were behind his back. “So with all that cheesecake, I should probably save my little surprise for later.”

At the word “surprise,” my mouth started to water. He really knew how to push my buttons.

He revealed that surprise, a box of apple fritter donuts, and held it just out of reach. “I’ll just store this for later.”

He was messing with me, like he always did.

I reached for the box, but of course I couldn’t pull my massive body off the couch. My fingers grazed the edge of the box before I flopped back down. “Come on, Greg.”

Smiling, he placed the box on the counter behind him.

“If you’re really hungry, you can grab one yourself.”

He stood back and waited for me to stand and walk. He wanted to watch the show.

It took a couple tries to push myself off the couch. Each time I fell back, fast food trash and empty potato chip bags landed on the floor. Finally, I was standing. After another fifty pounds or so, I probably wouldn’t be able to get off the couch without help.

Then I started the slow, difficult walk across the room. My gut thudded against my thighs. My feet crunched against fallen treats. But eventually, I made it to the donuts.

I’d really grown a passion for donuts over the years. Those were actually the first snacks I took into work. I kept them by my computer, and throughout the day, whenever I’d feel a sense of frustration, I’d pop one into my mouth. Over time, one became two. Two became more. And pretty soon, I didn’t feel complete unless I had a blast of sugar in my mouth.

Because I ate them so constantly, those donuts were the biggest contributors to my rapid weight gain, though Greg’s massive dinners came a close second.

And with each bite, with each new roll forming on my body, I felt less angry. About anything, really. With a full stomach, all problems were manageable, all annoyances were gone.

Greg proudly watched me open the box and scarf down the first apple fritter.

“Thanks, honey. These are just what I needed.”

He wrapped his arms around my overflowing waist, kissing me on the neck. “How you feeling?”

“A little hangry,” I joked. “I should probably finish this box.”

The End.

You can find all my stories here.

[sillygoofyqueer]

AUGH AUGH AUGH AUGH [sounds of me dying the longer I go without writing about the mad scientist AU] Nie Huaisang has just received a message written in blood via a crow that does NOT look alive, likely from Wei Wuxian due to the reference of what his sect is like, similar to how he first approached Nie Huaisang with a message. He isn't quite sure what to do - he should go to his brother at least with this information, but he is very busy planning the war with Lan Xichen and Nie Huaisang doesn't want to cause any more stress for them. So! He instead goes to Lan Wangji, who is, as always, helping out in the medical tents whenever he's not on the battlefield. Instead of saying anything that could draw attention to the situation, Nie Huaisang just waves him over and then shows off the yin filled - almost definitely dead - crow, before gesturing for them both to leave the medical tent. Lan Wangji goes without question.

Nie Huaisang shows him the message and is like "so uhh I'm pretty sure this is from Wei Wuxian." "Why is it written in blood?" "he's in the Burial Mounds, you can't expect him to have ink." Lan Wangji concedes this point, and wants to know why he is being told this, so Nie Huaisang explains that to have a batshit insane Wei Wuxian on their side would be very damn useful. Issue is, they need to find the Wen siblings and Xue Yang and get them to safety in order to get his support in the war, and Lan Wangji is great for field missions during this lull in the fighting. It's not like Nie Huaisang is going out!! He works best behind the scenes, after all.

Of course, Lan Wangji is more than desperate to make up for the mistakes he made by not attempting to help Wei Wuxian when he first had a chance to, so he goes out of his way to hunt for the Wen siblings and Xue Yang, chasing down information in a way that is basically like what he was doing during those three months in canon. He finally learns that they are in the supervisory office of Yiling, and goes on over there to collect them - and take back Yiling in the process. Yes, there is a thought of how close Wei Wuxian really was to his family all along, but it's overshadowed by the realisation that they need to explain to Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen what's been going on while they've been busy plotting and planning to save the Jianghu.

Lan Wangji makes the executive decision to bring it up during a meeting, and there is varying degrees of skepticism to the news. Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen are open to the chance of a changing tide in the war, plus they owe Wei Wuxian the protection of his family after they so carelessly overlooked him before he was thrown into the Burial Mounds. Jin Zixuan is like "I said right from the start that he was brainwashed, but nobody believed me!" so he's willing to take the risk of harbouring three wen associates if it means being proven right through the powerhouse that could be Wei Wuxian. (I should explain that they believe that he must be pretty powerful right now because one, he's actually survived in the Burial Mounds, and two, he's had previous work with resentful energy, he had to be getting up to some kind of work in the hellsite.)

Jiang Fengmian is like "I don't know all that much about him, but he did save Jiang Cheng's life, and he's the son of my bestie" but Yu Ziyuan (who is obviously there because why wouldn't she be) is NOT having it. Why would she? She's a hater. She's saying all sorts of insults n shit, but Lan Wangji basically left the moment he got assent from all of the actual sect leaders, so it's all for naught in the end. Lan Wangji is too busy showing up to the supervisory office in Yiling with a small group of soldiers, kicking ass and taking names like there's no tomorrow. Xue Yang, who is quite rabid at the moment, is watching the carnage and being like "I'm going to fucking kill anyone who touches Wei-gege's notes" while Wen Ning and Wen Qing are getting ready to escape. Lan Wangji catches them in the act but is like "we're here to help" and shows them the note that the crows sent.

The lads (Wen siblings + Xue Yang) realise that Wei Ying is alive and go through so many different emotions but they don't have time to unpack all of them - Xue Yang wants to go into the Burial Mounds himself to collect Wei Ying, but Wen Qing shuts that down. They don't know how Wei Ying survived, and they have no clue if Xue Yang would survive. It's best to just let Wei Ying come back to them, like a stray puppy. Xue Yang does not like this, so Wen Qing instead gets him with a needle and Wen Ning carries him along, used to this turn of events. (Yes I have decided that Wen Ning is the shy but sweet brawns to his older sister's brains. He's not not smart or anything, I just think it'd be neat.)

Meanwhile, the crows are watching all around because they're in Yiling, and they report back to an anxiously awaiting Wei Ying, who has been pre-emptively gathering an army of resentful spirits who could find closure in fighting and violence and death. He's helping them all be chill through a gentle melody session, and the Burial Mounds is dragging more spirits into Its grounds to help out Its precious son! Wei Ying learns that his family is not only alive but close to him, and is simultaneously kicking himself while also thanking the Gods that they are alive and they're going to be safe in the grasps of the Sunshot Campaign. With that knowledge handed to him, he feels a lot calmer as he squares his shoulders, pushing all the pain to the side and focusing on the army of resentful spirits he has created.

Oh, the Wen won't know what hit them.

[xoxodropletsneedsmorefanfics]

Imagine Jeremy Braiding Your Hair…

I really wanted to write a long Jeremy fic and have it posted today, but I had a final to take and then I spent most of the day studying for tomorrow’s final. College sucks 😔. DONT THEY KNOW ITS ONE OF MY HUSBANDS BIRTHDAY?!

Enjoy this short thing instead

Sigh.

What was he doing?

How did he let you convince him to do this?

Jeremy’s hands are slow and unsure as he gently parts through your hair. It was still moist from the shower you just took just a few minutes ago. “Jerebear, what are you so scared of? If you do something wrong, it’ll hurt me, not you.” You chuckle, “Um, that’s what I’m worried about. Believe or not I’d actually prefer not to cause you any pain.” Jeremy sighs. “Aw, you do care~” You coo, he lifts his hands away from your hair when you tilt your head back to look at him.

“Still, you’re stressing yourself out for nothing. I’ve seen you braid your own hair and as doofy as you look doing it, the finished product is always amazing.” You tell him, Jeremy starts to feel sticky under your honey sweet gaze. He adjust your head to face forward again, his pale cheeks becoming a soft pink. Jeremy sighs and gets back to work, despite your support, Jeremy’s movement remain awkward and stiff.

You hum slightly, immediately growing bored of the short silence, “Have you ever braided anyone else’s hair?” You asks “No.” Jeremy answers the second the question left your lips. It was like he knew you were going to ask at some point. Then again, you also already knew what his response would be. Jeremy continues, “No one else has ever asked me to braid their hair. And even if they did, I would’ve said no. Do you know how many germs are in a person’s scalp? Do you know how common lice is? How much flaking a scalp can do?” Jeremy asks, shuddering with each reminder of how truly disgusting a person’s scalp can be.

“What about Pran’s hair? It’s long and majestic. You’ve never wanted to braid your best friend’s hair?” You ask, Jeremy scoffs, “Yeah, he’s my best friend, so I know better than anyone how poorly kept his hair is.” He states, “Wait, seriously? Lynn told me that all the way back in high school. I can get angsty teen Pran not wanting to take care of his hair, but not adult Pran. How is his hair so long and pretty if he doesn’t even take care of it?” You chuckle with a bewildered smile.

Jeremy shrugs, “He has good genes. That’s the one thing his parents ever did for him.” He says, he finally guides his hands through your hair. And after 30 minutes of prep, it was completely painless. “Well, I’m glad this is another first of yours that I get the honor of claiming.” You snicker, Jeremy lets out a groan, but a smile worms its way into his face.

The two of you…talk.

About your day, about plans the two of you made for tomorrow…

All while Jeremy is braiding your—admittedly soft, clean hair.

Jeremy mind trails away from whatever nonsense you’re rambling about. This is…nice.

Soon, 20 minutes turned into an hour, and your words were starting to make less and less sense before coming to a stop.

“There. Done.” Jeremy announces quietly. You eagerly stand up, heading to a mirror to see the finish product, he takes a moment to look at your braid. It was in two simple braids, but he felt…happy. When he was younger, he never thought it’d be possible, but he is happy. Jeremy lets out a sigh, “Never asked me to do this again.” He says, leaning against the door frame. You let out a loud scoff, “No promises! I might just ask you to do this every time I wash my hair! Man, I always look amazing—but I look even better than before!” You laugh happily.

Jeremy’s smile is small and affectionate, silently accepting that braiding your hair was just going to be a part of his life now.

Not that he really had a problem with it.

[mountttmase]

It’s Kai and Sophia’s engagement party tonight, but you and mason have just recently split up. You both know excited are going to be there as you both wouldn’t let them down. Mason turns up about an hour early and he is greeting them both when Soph gets a phone call from you saying your cars broke down so you don’t know if you’ll make it. Soph is like “We have an hours till the party starts, i’ll come and pick you up” and after arguing with her you finally agree. When Mason finds out it’s you, he insists on picking you up and practically runs to his car, before Soph can ask if that’s a good idea.

When he gets to your location and you hear a car bib you’re confused as you can’t see Sophias car. Until you realise it’s mason and your stomach feels sick. You go over to him asking him

“Why are you here?!”

“because I thought it would be nice for us to have a talk before instead of it being awkward all night”

*you roll your eyes and get in the car and are playing with your finger nails as it’s awkwardly silent*

“you been okay”

“yeah good thanks, you?”

“Yeah I’m alright. I’ve missed you though”

“Mason don’t start this!”

Can you add something to this please?😅

SHUT THE FRONT DOOR I LOVE THIS SM LET ME SEE WHAT I CAN DO also its midnight what am I doing lol

‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry’ Mason gulped, his hands up in the air as if he was surrendering. ‘I just-‘

‘Look are you gonna help me, or not?’ You cut in sharply, ot ready to hear anything he had to say as you weren’t quite prepared for it. You knew tonight was going to be hard but you were hoping you could avoid him and get through it as best you could but now he was here you didn’t know what to think.

‘Let me have a look’ he sighed. Accepting defeat as he walked around to the front of your car to try and see if he could spot anything going on under the hood and after a few moments he saw it. ‘There’s fuel leaking out everywhere, something must be broken’

‘Fuck’ you breathed, not sure what you were going to do now as you didn’t have the money to fix this but before you could think anything else you heard Masons soft voice. Looking up to find him on the phone talking to someone and before you knew it he was stood in front of you.

‘Your cars fine parked here till tomorrow, my guy will come and get it in the morning and fix it, okay?’

‘I can’t afford that’ you gulped, hating that you had to admit that to he but he seemed completely unfazed and just shrugged his shoulders.

‘I’ve got it, don’t worry’

‘Mase-‘

‘Don’t argue, yeah? Just let me sort it’ he told you firmly and you didn’t have it in you to say anything back but after a quiet thank you, he was popping you in his car and driving you back to Sophia’s house.

As soon as you arrived he disappeared into the crowds and as time went by you felt worse about how you’d spoken to him when he came to help. Eventually going to grab his favourite drink in hopes you could find him somewhere and it didn’t take long to spot him in the garden. His bottom lip pulled in between his teeth as he mused over whatever was going through his mind but you noticed his eyes brighten as he caught sight of you.

‘Hey’ you smiled, passing him the bottle that he took carefully and the small smile he sent your way made your heart flutter. ‘I just wanted to say thank you for rescuing me earlier, and sorry for how i spoke to you’

‘You don’t need to apologise’ he shrugged. Clearly trying to play it cool and show you how unaffected he was but you saw right through it.

‘I do though, I was just stressed and snappy’ you told him but before you could get the next part out your eyes filled with tears and your voice became thick and emotional. ‘And I didn’t want to hear that you missed me cause I’ve missed you too and I hate this so much’

‘Oh baby’ he breathed, wrapping his free arm around you carefully so he could pull you into his body and you went with it. Finally feeling his strong body on yours again as you inhaled his scent after so long. ‘Don’t cry, bug’

‘Everything’s been shit since I left’ you blubbed. Not caring who was around and who could potentially see but Mason carefully steered you to a quiet spot where you could both sit and talk in peace knowing that you wouldn’t want everyone knowing your business.

‘I didn’t mean to upset you earlier, but I really have missed you’ he pouted as he pushed some of the hair out of your eyes but his words just made you cry harder. ‘I’ve been dreading tonight cause I knew there was no way I’d be able to keep away from you but seeing you this upset is even worse’

‘Sorry’ you chuckled as you wiped your eyes. Hoping that if he saw you smile then it might ease the tension a bit and even though it worked you could tell he was still feeling a lot of sympathy for you. ‘Do you maybe wanna get out of here? Maybe we can go somewhere and talk?’

‘Id like that’ he nodded. Squeezing your hand that was still grasped in his and as he lead you round the side of the house and back to his car. The only thing on your mind being hope that he would hear you out and you could put the last few months behind you.

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

shoutout to the girls from my mid class who saw me crying, said 'what's wrong?' in concern, then did Not laugh when i, not knowing how to answer them, solemnly held up a thumbs-down gesture. while continuing to cry. they were very nice and sweet about it all and so reassuring. 'you'll get it next time, they never fail people on the repeat!' not sure that's true, and i was told i'd be fine and wouldn't fail the first time, but yeah, appreciated.

[velvetwyrme]

in the voice of someone who is so so fucking busy: i need to. draw.

[septimusmoonlight]

You doing ok?

hi

[call-me-pup2]

I fear I have pupped too close to the sun 😬

Finally got the human dog bed thing full of foam and it takes up a quarter of the living room 😳 I knew it was big but I really underestimated it. I.e I may have to legit get rid of my bed for this instead 😅 Maybe I could put it on top of my current mattress but it was supposed to be a nap spot for the living room and it can't be since its too big ;-;

[rileys-battlecats]

was trying to figure out why I feel so Wrong rn and I think it's because I didn't follow my usual daily routine like At All and now my brain is freaking out. woke up at a vastly different time, had entirely different tasks throughout the day, took a nap at a weird time (to make up for the fact I had about 3 hours of sleep last night), zero human contact for the past 15 hours, and ate different food from usual (various leftovers from social events/thanksgiving, instead of cooking for myself like normal). and before I really realized that these were all things that were Bad For My Brain I was just wandering around my house like "why do I feel like garbage?? I've literally been outside so much today my brain should be happy"

ANYWAY here's to me not remembering I have issues with unstructured living because my days have been so similar for the past 4ish years that I straight up Forgot that things being too different too fast makes me crazy ✌️

[kowwpow]

I’m gonna be out most of the day bc I’ll be helping my dad with a big shopping trip plus being out after, so I’m going to be super duper exhausted

I don’t do well in crowded or loud places in the slightest, I get woozy and tired and I feel miserable or like I’m gonna pass out, and if the shopping isn’t gonna make me wanna cry, the outing after will bc it’s gonna be packed with lots of noise and people

I don’t say this because I want to complain, I just wanna give a super quick warning that I might not be active tomorrow as well as today bc when I get exhausted, my mental health tends to decline as well ;-;

so- a bit of a warning that I may poof a bit (sorry! 😣)

[figofswords]

the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something

[trenchcoat-full-of-snails]

.

[deus-ex-mona]

i miss her…

[rapidhighway]

Hnngg

[lemon-wedges]

...