#today started up fucked
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#today started up fucked#i had the perfect dsm joke in my mind just as i woke up at 3 a.m. (the time of day i have great ideas on)#and. guess what. I FORGOT. like i always do. It's so frustrating and it's been happening every day of the week#i'm seething like you got no idea.#Not only does it disrupt my rest but it also makes me pissed and dissapointed at random for the rest of the day#if it were only because i'm not a good sleeper i wouldn't be as bad. i'm already used to waking up in the middle of the night. for my#when it comes to those days i only feel at worst bitter. like i know my brain and my body are incredibly uncoordinated it's objective for me#i would be the happiest i'd ever been if it weren't because my body cannot think clever at normal hours and situations#instead on top of having to power through whatever my brain has going on waking me up at night(generally for stupid shit#or straight up nothing) i also have to worry about my brain's incompetence for being creative. guess i'll never thrive in the modern world
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it's been exactly a year since the last chapter of Operation Walburga's Arbitrary No Kissing Ever Rule and I still miss it. This scene is probably one of my favourite things I've ever written and I've wanted to draw it for forever, so now seemed like an appropriate time
#jegulus#jegulus fanart#marauders fanart#regulus black#james potter#james x regulus#marauders#regulus black fanart#james potter fanart#starchaser#sunseeker#regulus x james#marauders era#jegulus fanfiction#fic: operation wanker#hp#mine#my art#ngl this drawing specifically made me realise why i prefer writing over drawing#i think too much in concepts to be able to capture a scene in a way that i want#you cant draw the same thing from several perspectives at once if you dont wanna go for cubism#(tho honestly cubism fanart sounds like a concept i could get behind mmmmm)#anyway i stayed up far too fucking long to finish this in time for today (and by too long i mean until 8am too long)#because originally i had planned to start posting ritardando as my anniversary celebration. yk more fake dating and all that...#but alas i scrapped the whole thing so drawing happened instead#not 100% satisified with how this turned out cause i dont know how perspectives work. or people. or backgrounds outside. you get the idea#i really very much like the second one tho i think its very pretty
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Alex and my farmer Cosmo (he/him)
#my replacement pen came in today ican finally start working on artfight attacks YAYYYYY#ive been clawing at the walls itching to get my ideas out for weeks#i drew alex with wavy hair in the second drawing bc i got his dialogue where he stops using hair gel and i hc he has naturally#wavy hair ^_^ i think it goes well with him softening up as u get to knw him.. now im just trying to work up the courage to give#him a bouquet lol. i keep flip flopping on whether i wanna play this file thru my oc or just fuck it and go self insert#but i like building little ideas in my mind for how my farmer would fit in pelican town and how they run their farm so i think ill keep thi#an oc thing. i have another file on pc since 1.6 isnt released for mobile yet so thatll be my self insert thing where plan on#shooting my shot with harvey. HES CUTE.. I LIKE HIM#cosmo seems pretty deadpan but only bc hes hardly fazed by anything and after working at joja for like 4 years. hes#desperate to touch grass. i think his personality would bounce off well with alex's since he comes off as arrogant to get a reaction#frm others and then u have cosmo whos like 😐👍. i like to think itd drive him up the wall LOL#he gets more of a reaction out of cosmo when he shows him his soft side which encourages him not to front all the time <3#my art#myart#my oc#oc#sdv farmer#sdv oc#stardew valley#sdv#sdv alex#alex mullner#doodles
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got him off-balance!
#my art#ds9#star trek deep space nine#julian bashir#elim garak#garashir#watercolor#image desc in alt text#i normally post on mondays but. today im breaking my pattern! getting a little silly. getting a little wild. garashir jumpscare#“tumblr user chitinleg garak would neot easily let himself be swooped off his feet into a hug like that” yes i know BUT!#look at his expression. look at how his arms r pinned. he didnt let this happen LMAO julian just surprised him. grabby huggy human behavior#if you look really closely you can see the tiniest frown in the world on Garak's face. because he's like “EEP !”#cant see bashirs face at all in this only his body but i think we can all imagine that whatevers going thru his head. he needs this hug bad#ALSO. for anyone wondering what the fucked up shadow is that starts at the juncture of the teal sleeve-cap where its set into the armhole#the jumpsuits have a bit of a fold of extra fabric (called an Action Pleat) there which allows for a little more maneuverability of the bod#AND creates a really sleek and flat back panel#because you can see the fabric twists along the side arent grabbing the flat back fabric theyre grabbing the fabric folded beneath it#often times i think about drawing out a dissection of kiras first uniform and this voy era one for other artists to use. bc god knows#i struggled at first to find full body references#they like to shoot ds9 very close to peoples heads. and the camera is so blurry. they smeared butter on that thing. god bless
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Monday its time to return to my office in lacille inc
#pet play lacille? more likely than you think#i think its a funny kink to give laios. marcille would hesitantly agree to try and maybe even get into it#and then laios starts doing shit like ripping up curtains and shes like what the fuck are you doing#you havent house trained me marcille! it takes 4 months of training for a puppy to be fully house broken!#and then falin comes home and laios is tied up outside#anyway those were my delusions for today good monday everyone
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I fully believe that if Shen Yuan transmigrated before Luo Binghe existed, he would have shifted all of his weird obsessive fangirl/antifan energy onto Airplane bro
#provided he sussed him out first#instead of having the protagonist to simp over#he'd be forced to switch gears#and hyperfixate on the reason he's here in the first place#that god forsaken author#at least he wouldn't be forced to follow the plot too heavily#and could explore the worldbuilding#but he's gonna drag that dumb-fuck author along for the ride!!#for all the things he didn't include in his final novel ofc#not any other reason#hurry up and finish doing the sects' taxes shidi#the three finned alligator foxes migration starts today and they won't do it for another five years!!#svsss#shang qinghua#shen qingqiu#cumplane#blorbo#ily shang qinghua 💞
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actually i love it when the characters are all lying. i love it when they all have secrets and none of them trust each other. i love being given clues that solve puzzles i haven't even been presented with yet. i also love it when i get chills watching a scene without even knowing what it means, and when i do know what it means, i get even more chills. i love theorizing and thinking and solving and coming up with possibilities of where a story might be going. i love it and i will do it for free, for fun, for no real reason.
this is a mystery appreciation post!! if you appreciate mysteries and secrets and stories that slowly unravel before you, please interact!!!
#mystery >>>> true crime#mystery >>>> horror#i just really love me some mystery and thought that my love of mystery should be a tumblr post#gonna tag some shows and books that i love#1899#(i just started watching it today w/ my parent. already filling all of my 'good mystery show' requirements)#only murders in the building#all the wrong questions#a series of unfortunate events#yes. snicketverse is valid mystery fiction. get over it. snicketverse fucks.#the nevers#maaan....i miss the nevers. im so sad that it got cancelled it was some gooood shit.#agatha christie#aka the absolute queen of murder mystery. she IS the genre.#hercule poirot#i grew up on hercule poirot. i still love hercule poirot.#books#literature#mystery#murder mystery#appreciation post#genre fiction#fiction#writing#fritz rambles too much
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the lucky one
#fnf pico#pico's school#cassandra pico's school#moon art#picos school#fnf#fnf fanart#pico fnf#pico newgrounds#cassandra fnf#fnf cassandra#newgrounds#todays the 25th anniversary of the terrible newgrounds school game wow !!#genuinely what was he doing while the screen was black after cassandra started killing people. i choose to believe he was simply in shock.#please don't tag as ship. this is not ship art. i mean i can't stop you but you'll hurt my feelings :(#i just like cassandra having a one-sided crush on pico and sparing him bc of that. its fucked up. teehee angst#cw guns#cw death#cw blood#cw child death#cw school shooting#those sure are tags.
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prince and prince friendship. this is my vision
#blood cw ////////#violence cw ///////////#erikar#eridan ampora#dirk strider#karkat vantas#dave strider#im just crazy about the idea that eridan and dirk would get along#theyre both fucked up in the head but in a way where they go ''theyre a freak but theyre basically OK'' about each other#eridan is too stupid/stubborn to manipulate and dirk literally could not give less of a shit about eridan's drama#so they have like a net 0 impact on each other#they do not make each other better. they also do not make each other worse.#they just get really bored and lonely sometimes#''do u want to stave off the ennui and beat the shit out of each other'' ''sure i dont have anything else going on today''#just super lethargic and almost transactional#since they only hang out when theyre both bored as shit. from the outside it almost looks like a moirallegiance thing#at least until they start trying to murder each other which is when it suddenly looks like a kismesis#but its neither#theyre literally just bored and love violence#eridan <> karkat btw
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Snufkin and Snorkmaiden hanging out :]
#I used a... kiddy aquarelle set to paint this can you tell I donno how to use those? Oh and did the accents with markers!#I HAVE 3 BLOCKS OF AQUARELLE PAPER AND I LIKE- NEVER USE THAT PAINT- why did I buy them. Maybe so I can START! haha. No#No I didn't but well maybe I should use it eitherway#The process of making this can be simply summed up with “fuck around and find out”#Tbh I might actually hang it up on my wall I think it turned out really cute! Look at 'em! Sitting!!! Literal besties#I had 2 coffees today and I have NEVER felt so at peace in my life I mean it's starting to wear off now but the point still stands#snorkmaiden#snorkfröken#niiskuneiti#snufkin#moomin#moomin books#moomins
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Based on my favorite gif lately
#my art stuff#digital art#baldurs gate 3#bg3#astarion#batstarion#once again specifying this is a spawn astarion with some sort of wild shape thing#bat#good morning#gif#I’ve been in such a weird place mentally about art lately#I just keep stopping myself from drawing things cus I want to draw Astarion -#- but fsr my brain decided I draw him wrong and thus makes it pointless to even start#bat form is fine - I have no problems with it. But in his normal form? no can do buckaroo.#It’s one part why I haven’t shared much art lately - I don’t get happy enough about the “quality”#then just don’t share it as a result - in turn making me feel worse because I’m not posting - making me doubt myself more - etc etc#idk man - I got way too giddy earlier today cus someone could tell this was Astarion - even though this isn’t even the version of him I -#- feel insecure about#I keep seeing these artists making more realistic art and cool comics and interactions - most of which are shaded really beautifully -#- and all I can think about is how I CAN’T do that - even if it wouldn’t fuck me up mentally#I just put too much stress on my ability to create realism and I keep “failing” at doing that (by actively avoiding it for my own health)#idk man - I just wish I felt better about Astarion’s stupid chin OTL
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I'm probably going to regret this, but:
It is 100% true that people can, and should, denounce Israel's horrifying atrocities without being antisemitic. Unfortunately, it's also true that the people who are the loudest about the fact tend to immediately follow it up with something that makes me think, "people can denounce Israel's crimes without being antisemitic, but you sure haven't managed it."
#so many people who never gave a single fuck about palestinians until last year suddenly became very concerned-#once they thought it gave them license to go mask off about their big opinions about any and all jewish people#i've seen this countless times but today's was one that started out sounding vaguely reasonable and ended up at a vile screed#and of course it was from someone with zero actual rl stake in i/p bc it nearly always is#anghraine babbles#cw antisemitism#politics for ts
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my current favourite youtube channel is this guy that just gets high as fuck and loses his goddamn mind reacting to various divas for the first time. he understands.
#you have no idea how hard it was to narrow down what clip to post i just had to go with this one cus i watched it today#but his other videos are just as good#endless respect for anyone who starts off a mariah album with a blunt and ends up literally on the floor#it's also fun watching the room get hazier as he smokes through albums and sometimes he puts on party lights if he's really feeling it#look at the fucking ash tray on the speaker lmfao#if you put this energy in the passenger seat of a honda civic this was me ages 18-20
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PURPOSE 2
#started weeks ago. abandoned. finished today on a whim cuz im ballin#go look at the other one again#mox’s arm looks good as fuck though#lawlor’s left leg too#ok i’m done jacking myself off#jon moxley#filthy tom lawlor#defy wrestling#aewedit#my art#shut up about wrestling#it’s
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simself college fits
#nothing will ever seperate me from the giò ferrari jumper i found in a charity shop#these past few days have been tough as fuck but i'm going to treat myself next weekend by going to a record fair#and i'm going to buy a carhartt patchwork jacket i've had my eye on for months#hope everyones keeping well i haven't been around here much#my friends and i started a minecraft server which we've been obsessively playing#so i haven't really played any sims..#inspiration to do anything at all has been sparse lately i won't lie#side effect of doing a creative course i guess..#college starts up again today.. getting up at 6am was a joy 😐😐#see ya simblr
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hi.
#i know most of you didn’t even realize i was gone#but man…#my mental health was like in a state of 📉📉📉 in the past 30 days like we love being mentally ill and fucking insane <3#it was mostly bc i panicked and started obsessing over possible water damage in my flat kind of out of nowhere#like it started when my landlord came to check my bathroom bc my downstairs neighbours had water stains on their ceiling back in july#which had been caused by their shower curtain apparently but i was already spiraling when my landlord told me so i was sure it was my fault#i was assuming it was bc of me bc i had sometimes been spilling some of my bathwater and i was like WHAT IF IT HAS GONE THROUGH THE FLOOR?#and it didn't help that it has been hot af and very humid in my apartment LIKE WELL OVER 25 DEGREES AND 60% HUMIDITY#anyways i couldn’t shake this not matter what i tried and my fucking insane brain made me think i was going to get arrested for like#flooding the whole building or for causing some sort of mold infestation#i had SO MANY panic attacks; i wasn't able to sleep; i wasn't able to eat; i was on edge and panicky basically 24/7 so fun fun fun :D#and i kept waking up in the middle of the night and HAD to go check my walls or the space below my kitchen#it was compulsory like i couldn't not get up and go check and tbh i would've thrown out all of my furniture if i could've to check for mold#(and shhhh i know how fucking insane this sounds but having a mentally ill brain that's anxious all the time does suck ass sometimes 🥲)#(the worst thing about it tho was that i was SO AWARE of how insane about this i was being and yet i couldn't stop losing my mind over it)#(also i was so ready to move tf outta here bc i couldn't handle being triggered 24/7 which is why my mom let me stay with her last week )#i was so out of it that i couldn't even let myself do the things i usually enjoy... like at all#like watching my shows or spending any ungodly amount of time on tumblr... or replying to messages i got from people who i love#ig this goes to show HOW bad this actually was for me mentally bc usually tumblr and my shows are like my safe place#anyways we finally had a leak detection dude come over today and we had him check the water levels in my walls#and he said everything is fine and he specifically told me i should stop worrying about any water damage BC THERE IS NO WATER DAMAGE#he also said that the weather has just been insanely humid this year so it's not surprising that the humidity levels are higher than usual#i’m still a bit scared about some possible mold but ig this is good enough for now#i am aware how ridiculous this must sound for anyone who's reading this now but couldn't let it go not even with meds so let me live pls :(#TLDR I WAS GOING THROUGH IT BUT I AM BACK I THINK AND I AM MOST LIKELY GOING TO START BOTHERING YOU WITH MY GIFS AGAIN <3#AND I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ANY OF THE HEART KILLERS STUFF YET ASIDE FROM ONE OR TWO PICS LIKE :(#OH AND I NEED TO START WATCHING SUMMER NIGHT ;_;#sabrina talks#@AIRENYAH GIRL I AM SO SORRY I WILL PROBABLY REPLY TO YOUR MESSAGES LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW MORNING ;_;<3
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