#today started up fucked
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#today started up fucked#i had the perfect dsm joke in my mind just as i woke up at 3 a.m. (the time of day i have great ideas on)#and. guess what. I FORGOT. like i always do. It's so frustrating and it's been happening every day of the week#i'm seething like you got no idea.#Not only does it disrupt my rest but it also makes me pissed and dissapointed at random for the rest of the day#if it were only because i'm not a good sleeper i wouldn't be as bad. i'm already used to waking up in the middle of the night. for my#when it comes to those days i only feel at worst bitter. like i know my brain and my body are incredibly uncoordinated it's objective for me#i would be the happiest i'd ever been if it weren't because my body cannot think clever at normal hours and situations#instead on top of having to power through whatever my brain has going on waking me up at night(generally for stupid shit#or straight up nothing) i also have to worry about my brain's incompetence for being creative. guess i'll never thrive in the modern world
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My cheque I've been waiting a few months for and was supposedly delivered one week ago is now beyond a doubt either stolen or missing. (:
#I realize today is April Fools Day but it seems I am the Fool#USPS informed delivery said it was delivered Tuesday and we were able to get out to the old location on Thursday#and it wasn't there#or on Friday#or yesterday#it was supposed to take care of us for at least a month#I had so many plans for it#especially because April is my birth month#literally nearly $1000 just fucking evaporated#I just can't win lol#today sucked from the moment I woke up and felt an intense depressive spiral#but this is genuinely just cherry and the icing on top of this shit cake#this job was done in December#I've been waiting since then and then jumped through so many hoops to get actually fucking paid#and I literally begged them to send it to this address or make it out to Kalen so he could cash it#specifically to save myself so much trouble and avoid this exact scenario#and they said no and sent it to the faraway old address#and USPS claims it's been delivered but it's not there#so fuck me i guess#excellent fucking start to my favourite month#I'm going to rot in bed to practice rotting in hell#though i suppose I'm already fucking here lmfao#negative blah
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Alex and my farmer Cosmo (he/him)
#my replacement pen came in today ican finally start working on artfight attacks YAYYYYY#ive been clawing at the walls itching to get my ideas out for weeks#i drew alex with wavy hair in the second drawing bc i got his dialogue where he stops using hair gel and i hc he has naturally#wavy hair ^_^ i think it goes well with him softening up as u get to knw him.. now im just trying to work up the courage to give#him a bouquet lol. i keep flip flopping on whether i wanna play this file thru my oc or just fuck it and go self insert#but i like building little ideas in my mind for how my farmer would fit in pelican town and how they run their farm so i think ill keep thi#an oc thing. i have another file on pc since 1.6 isnt released for mobile yet so thatll be my self insert thing where plan on#shooting my shot with harvey. HES CUTE.. I LIKE HIM#cosmo seems pretty deadpan but only bc hes hardly fazed by anything and after working at joja for like 4 years. hes#desperate to touch grass. i think his personality would bounce off well with alex's since he comes off as arrogant to get a reaction#frm others and then u have cosmo whos like 😐👍. i like to think itd drive him up the wall LOL#he gets more of a reaction out of cosmo when he shows him his soft side which encourages him not to front all the time <3#my art#myart#my oc#oc#sdv farmer#sdv oc#stardew valley#sdv#sdv alex#alex mullner#doodles
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it's been exactly a year since the last chapter of Operation Walburga's Arbitrary No Kissing Ever Rule and I still miss it. This scene is probably one of my favourite things I've ever written and I've wanted to draw it for forever, so now seemed like an appropriate time
#jegulus#jegulus fanart#marauders fanart#regulus black#james potter#james x regulus#marauders#regulus black fanart#james potter fanart#starchaser#sunseeker#regulus x james#marauders era#jegulus fanfiction#fic: operation wanker#hp#mine#my art#ngl this drawing specifically made me realise why i prefer writing over drawing#i think too much in concepts to be able to capture a scene in a way that i want#you cant draw the same thing from several perspectives at once if you dont wanna go for cubism#(tho honestly cubism fanart sounds like a concept i could get behind mmmmm)#anyway i stayed up far too fucking long to finish this in time for today (and by too long i mean until 8am too long)#because originally i had planned to start posting ritardando as my anniversary celebration. yk more fake dating and all that...#but alas i scrapped the whole thing so drawing happened instead#not 100% satisified with how this turned out cause i dont know how perspectives work. or people. or backgrounds outside. you get the idea#i really very much like the second one tho i think its very pretty
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Uh happy holidays and whatnot take the bandit equivalent to a lump of coal
#bandit's doodles#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi dakota#jrwi wiwi#I wouldn’t say this is ghostkicks per se but if you want to think of it like that be my guest pookie whatever makes you happy#making stupid animatics like this is always fun#I’ve been doing em for a minute but maybe I’ll start posting more of them now#I don’t even celebrate Christmas but for those who do hope this is good enough mwa mwa#anyway remember when this party was the most stressful thing they were going through lol#(<-voice of a man who is coming up on the greyscale arc in his rewatch)#speaking of which totally unrelated#but I binged Danny phantom last night/today and there’s a fucking episode titles ‘shades of gray’#and when I saw that shit I almost bursted into tears#anyway happy holidays merry Christmas have a beautiful Kwanzaa have a glorious Hanukkah and have a radiant winter#rides away on my bandit-drawn sleigh
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Alex Turner + gushing talking about Miles Kane
#i will never be over the way alex says ‘miles fucking kane’ in that last clip#NEVER#😭😭😭#also i am forever obsessed with the way matt and nick and jamie react whenever alex starts talking about miles#it’s sooooooo telling oh my god#you just know he never shuts up about him#also the phrasing ‘someday we’ll ride again’ when two years later they write a song where alex sings about riding the riddle??#and we all know who the wirral riddler is#i mean#jesus christ 💀#anyway yeah i’ve been meaning to finish this compilation forever#and a moderate chronic pain flare and not being able to leave the house today has meant i’ve finally managed to get it done 🥳#alex turner#miles kane#milex#arctic monkeys#tlsp#the last shadow puppets#lulu posts
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🎶: am i your girl (dance version) by peach pit
#body image#bichota.#linc.selfie#these are not cohesive AT ALL but i had to give you poses i had to give you angles i had to give you details#anyways happy taurus season!!! i’m thriving i’m living i’m standing in the sun every morning for at least fifteen mins!!!#we’re going out to dinner with my mom and her ~boyfriend~(!!!!!) for our birthdays and i’m thinking i might dress up every day this week#also!!!! i crushed my midterm today!!!! i think i’ll get an 80 which is fine i’m not an overachiever especially not for stats#omg also also did you guys watch the newest episode of tlou? so good#the set design team goes fucking OFF#ellie and dina??? i love women!!!!!!!!!#anyways i can start having people over for dinner again but after felix and christian and mason because they have first dibs#eric egan tags™
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Monday its time to return to my office in lacille inc


#pet play lacille? more likely than you think#i think its a funny kink to give laios. marcille would hesitantly agree to try and maybe even get into it#and then laios starts doing shit like ripping up curtains and shes like what the fuck are you doing#you havent house trained me marcille! it takes 4 months of training for a puppy to be fully house broken!#and then falin comes home and laios is tied up outside#anyway those were my delusions for today good monday everyone
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I fully believe that if Shen Yuan transmigrated before Luo Binghe existed, he would have shifted all of his weird obsessive fangirl/antifan energy onto Airplane bro
#provided he sussed him out first#instead of having the protagonist to simp over#he'd be forced to switch gears#and hyperfixate on the reason he's here in the first place#that god forsaken author#at least he wouldn't be forced to follow the plot too heavily#and could explore the worldbuilding#but he's gonna drag that dumb-fuck author along for the ride!!#for all the things he didn't include in his final novel ofc#not any other reason#hurry up and finish doing the sects' taxes shidi#the three finned alligator foxes migration starts today and they won't do it for another five years!!#svsss#shang qinghua#shen qingqiu#cumplane#blorbo#ily shang qinghua 💞
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Double vision
#I’ve been wanting to draw him for so long#started out as rendering practice then injury practice then lighting practice#shoutout to my sister who started watching bebop today#my art#cowboy bebop#spike spiegel#cowboy bebop fanart#see you space cowboy#cw blood#tw blood#this is based on a Pinterest pose which is why his arm is fucked up lol. cunty
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prince and prince friendship. this is my vision
#blood cw ////////#violence cw ///////////#erikar#eridan ampora#dirk strider#karkat vantas#dave strider#im just crazy about the idea that eridan and dirk would get along#theyre both fucked up in the head but in a way where they go ''theyre a freak but theyre basically OK'' about each other#eridan is too stupid/stubborn to manipulate and dirk literally could not give less of a shit about eridan's drama#so they have like a net 0 impact on each other#they do not make each other better. they also do not make each other worse.#they just get really bored and lonely sometimes#''do u want to stave off the ennui and beat the shit out of each other'' ''sure i dont have anything else going on today''#just super lethargic and almost transactional#since they only hang out when theyre both bored as shit. from the outside it almost looks like a moirallegiance thing#at least until they start trying to murder each other which is when it suddenly looks like a kismesis#but its neither#theyre literally just bored and love violence#eridan <> karkat btw
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Snufkin and Snorkmaiden hanging out :]

#I used a... kiddy aquarelle set to paint this can you tell I donno how to use those? Oh and did the accents with markers!#I HAVE 3 BLOCKS OF AQUARELLE PAPER AND I LIKE- NEVER USE THAT PAINT- why did I buy them. Maybe so I can START! haha. No#No I didn't but well maybe I should use it eitherway#The process of making this can be simply summed up with “fuck around and find out”#Tbh I might actually hang it up on my wall I think it turned out really cute! Look at 'em! Sitting!!! Literal besties#I had 2 coffees today and I have NEVER felt so at peace in my life I mean it's starting to wear off now but the point still stands#snorkmaiden#snorkfröken#niiskuneiti#snufkin#moomin#moomin books#moomins
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Based on my favorite gif lately
#my art stuff#digital art#baldurs gate 3#bg3#astarion#batstarion#once again specifying this is a spawn astarion with some sort of wild shape thing#bat#good morning#gif#I’ve been in such a weird place mentally about art lately#I just keep stopping myself from drawing things cus I want to draw Astarion -#- but fsr my brain decided I draw him wrong and thus makes it pointless to even start#bat form is fine - I have no problems with it. But in his normal form? no can do buckaroo.#It’s one part why I haven’t shared much art lately - I don’t get happy enough about the “quality”#then just don’t share it as a result - in turn making me feel worse because I’m not posting - making me doubt myself more - etc etc#idk man - I got way too giddy earlier today cus someone could tell this was Astarion - even though this isn’t even the version of him I -#- feel insecure about#I keep seeing these artists making more realistic art and cool comics and interactions - most of which are shaded really beautifully -#- and all I can think about is how I CAN’T do that - even if it wouldn’t fuck me up mentally#I just put too much stress on my ability to create realism and I keep “failing” at doing that (by actively avoiding it for my own health)#idk man - I just wish I felt better about Astarion’s stupid chin OTL
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i love gardening so much. i’m so happy and excited to start planting tomatoes and tomatillos and squash n stuff i could cry
#it makes me so happy but also aggressive#like i *clenches fist jaw* LOVE GARDENING#i picked up compost today !!! 400lbs#which is nothing bc each bag was 40lbs but still i am proud#like. all that?? after a day of binging?? fuck yes#also binging starts again NOW#talk
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yall I think it's finally the day I finish jaspers name on my jacket
#march has been Really Bad for me but i woke up today with the fog clear for the first time in a few weeks#and its nice yknow#theres still a long long way to go but fuck it we're making it!!!!#might celebrate by dedicating more time to my jacket#silver talks#unrelated but i love how you can tell exactly which letter i started with
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OH MY GOODDDD KI, WHY CAN'T THE RATBEARD PLUSH SIT ON ANYTHING??? IT WILL NOT LET ME PLACE HIM ON ANY HOUSING ITEM.
EL TORO AND THE NINJA PIG PLUSHES CAN BE PUT ON MY NIGHTSTAND AND MY BED, BUT NOT RATBEARD.
WHY DID I HAVE TO PUT HIM ON MY FLOOR.
#makeship#pirate101 ratbeard#he's now the plush that i kick off the bed in my sleep and wake up to find staring at me in the morning#wtf is wrong with this. has anyone else experienced this issue. is ki gonna fix it if it is a thing#i held off on redeeming the code since i cant spare time for a p101 member rn but said fuck it today#and i got so frustrated i just started throwing the ratbeard plush everywhere lmao
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