#to be fair i probably should've warned her about that one.

[essektheylyss]

had a very lovely conversation with my mom but I did laugh that she was like "I'm really glad you called 🥺" and I then hung up and saw my sister's texts, which were like, "LMAO HAPPY 8 YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO THE MOST CHAOTIC COMING OUT POST" and I was like, ah yes, my mother is probably mostly relieved that this time around she didn't find out her eldest child came out as bi on Facebook in a rage via the family grapevine instead of like. calling home.

[mydearzero]

i need jealous spencer SO BAD if he sees a guy flirting with you it would drive him crazy, no thinking, he just has to have you and everyone needs to know that you're his and only his, smut pls with praise (“good girl” 🥰) THANK U SO MUCH ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Thank you for the request and for reading!! I got inspired to write this as a continuation of Prey, so that's what it'll be! I hope you enjoy ♡

Predator | Professor!Spencer Reid x Reader

This is a part 2 to Prey, but can be read as a standalone.

MASTERLIST

18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Summary: You apparently have a knack for picking up FBI agents. But if prison has taught Spencer one thing, it's that sharing is not his forté.

Contents: NO Y/N, fem!Reader, SMUT, professor/student relationship, age gap, dom/sub, dom!Spencer, sub!reader, public sex, penetrative sex, oral sex (f rec), unprotected sex, creampie, jealousy, possessiveness, praise kink, a lil bit of degradation, exhibitionism. If I missed any warnings please tell me!

3.9K words

You didn't know what you'd expected after finally getting what you wanted. Sure, you weren't going to date your professor. Yet, you had expected Reid to at least acknowledge what had happened between the two of you. Maybe tell you to keep it to yourself, bribe you to not tell a soul. 

Nothing. Not a peep. 

It didn't help he was only on campus sporadically. You tended to forget teaching was only his temporary side gig. He had to go back to catching bad guys. So much for your eye candy. 

You couldn't let yourself dwell on Dr. Spencer Reid. It was a one-time thing, and he probably regretted it. He'd let his desires get the best of him. 

You sighed as you applied some chapstick, checking your hair in the mirror before turning to put on your coat. It was just drinks with friends, but you were in no mood to be social. You hadn't told them about your stint with Spencer and weren't planning on telling them anytime soon. They just knew you were hung up on someone and would likely try to set you up to help you get over it. 

It wasn't fair you were even hung up about it. You didn't have feelings for him. He was just so intriguing. It was hard to see him go. You sighed and locked the door behind you, greeting your friends and getting in the car towards O'Keeffe's. 

Loud music, conversation and laughter met your ears as you entered the bar. You threw a quick glance around the crowded room, spotting an open spot at the bar. You got the attention of your friends, pointing to the free space. 

Spencer chuckled at one of Penelope's jokes, but his smile quickly dropped as he saw you walk into the team's favourite bar. You obviously hadn't spotted him, engrossed in a conversation with a girl he'd previously seen in his class. He sighed, sipping his drink and trying to pull his attention away from you. 

"What is it, Spence?" JJ inquired. He shook his head in dismissal. 

"It's nothing, just a couple of students from my class," Spencer explained, letting his eyes wander over your body just this once. 

"That doesn't look like nothing, boy wonder," Emily raised an eyebrow, following his gaze. 

"Just some unfinished business, is all. Nothing interesting." 

Nothing interesting. Spencer scoffed to himself. Even he didn't believe it. He was glad his break from the BAU was over, not having to force himself to ignore your inquiries any longer. He'd been reckless, and now he'd have to live with the consequences. The consequences haunted his mind every time he closed his eyes. 

Please, Spencer. Please.

Your desperate words echoed around his head. He should've never given in. 

"Do tell more, my inconspicuous sage," Penelope leaned her head on her crossed fingers, a big grin on her face. 

"There's nothing to tell, Garcia. They're my students," Spencer shrugged. He had a superb poker face, but nothing could be hidden from his team. 

JJ narrowed her eyes at him, trying to figure it out. Emily was way ahead of her, letting out a pleasantly surprised scoff. "You animal! You slept with one of them!" 

"Will you keep it down?!" Spencer whisper-yelled. Realizing he hadn't denied it, he looked at the glass in his hands, refusing to meet the girls' eyes. 

"I see you, Casanova. Wouldn't have pegged you the type," Penelope laughed. Spencer shook his head.

"Because I'm not! It was a mistake," it was more to convince himself than the others. 

"So, which one is it?" JJ questioned, wanting to discuss his type with the girls. 

Spencer refused to look in the direction of the bar, not wanting to give anything away. "Can we please just change the subject?"

"No can do, Spence. Now, is it the tall, leggy blonde? Oh! Is it the one talking to the newbie?" That caught Spencer's attention. 

"What?" His head snapped up, turning to where you were leaning against the bar, Luke Alvez whispering in your ear. Spencer's grip on his glass tightened as he observed your pleasant smile. He squinted his eyes, trying to make out what Alvez possibly could've said to paint that smile on your face. The smile he'd wrongly presumed was reserved for him. 

"Oh, that's the one, alright." Emily laughed. Spencer snapped out of his jealous tunnel vision, trying to appear unaffected by the situation. Damn you, Alvez. He was supposed to go and get drinks, not flirt with girls barely over the legal drinking age. He crossed his arms and tried to tune in on the girls' conversation. 

"Look at him, definitely jealous. Crossed arms? Refusing to look in their direction? Chewing the inside of his mouth? Classic signs of jealousy." JJ spoke, gesturing to Spencer's body. He really regretted agreeing to go out. 

He watched you throw back the last of your drink, laughing at a story Luke told. 

"Do you have any pictures?" You asked. Luke had been telling you all about his Belgian Shepherd, Roxy. You couldn't even remember how the topic came up in the last ten minutes you'd been speaking with him. 

Luke was classically handsome. Toned, too. You admired his features, but condemned yourself for comparing them to a certain professor's. You'd approached him as he waited for his drinks, asking if you'd previously met. He looked familiar. You just couldn't put your finger on why. Surely you would've remembered meeting someone as handsome as him.

The mystery man had told you that, no, you hadn't met, but introduced himself as Luke Alvez. 

Luke showed you a few pictures of his adorable dog before continuing the conversation. "So, what do you do?" 

"I'm a full-time student, currently. You?" You got comfy leaning against the bar, enjoying his company. 

"I actually work for the FBI," Luke informed you. You nearly choked on your drink, instantly realizing why he'd been familiar. You'd done your research. 

"You wouldn't happen to be a part of the BAU?" You winced. 

"Yes, actually! How'd you kn-" 

Luke was cut off by a harsh grip on your upper arm. Your head turned, only to find the hand to be attached to the source of your dread. 

"Spencer? What are you doing here?" You tried to be casual, but you were panicking. Was he here with Luke? Or was it just a coincidence? 

"I could ask you the same thing," Spencer dejected. 

"I was actually talking to my new friend Luke here," you tugged your arm out of Spencer's grip, a challenging expression on your face. Luke looked uncomfortable, clearly already having figured out how you'd learned he was a part of the BAU. 

"Why do you have to be so fucking diff- No, you know what? I'm not doing this. Let's go," Spencer motioned towards the door of the bar. You furrowed your brows in confusion. First, he wanted nothing to do with you, and now he expected you to just leave with him without question? 

"What? No, I'm not leaving. I'm here with friends. Besides, why would I leave with you, Professor?" You questioned. Luke's expression changed to one of surprise. That definitely wouldn't have been his first guess, seeing as you'd called him 'Spencer.' 

"Is that Professor Reid? Oh my god, hi!" One of your friends finally noticed what was going down. Spencer gave her a tight-lipped smile and half-hearted raise of his hand. Their attention quickly returned to their previous conversation. 

Spencer looked agitated, taking a deep breath to recollect his bearings. "Please, just come with me," he pleaded quietly. You crossed your arms and huffed. 

"You can't go making demands, Spencer! Not when you've been ignoring me!" You tried to keep your volume down, trying to not give away what had obviously happened. 

Luke took that as his queue to leave, but not before earning a nasty look from Spencer. He raised his hands in defence. When Luke returned to the table, he was met with excited whispers from the girls. 

"I've never seen him like this," JJ exclaimed. They were all observing as you were arguing with Spencer. 

"I take it you know what's going on there?" Luke sat down, putting his beer next to Spencer's unfinished glass. 

"Oh, newbie. It's a true scandal. Our resident genius was very jealous of your new lady friend," Penelope clapped her hands together in excitement. 

"But she's his student, right?" 

"Exactly why it's such a scandal!" 

The team observed your body language as well as Spencer's. They noticed your defensive stance, a change from the relaxed one you'd had when talking to Luke. Spencer, too, exuded a different energy. He was clearly in charge of the conversation, domineering stance looking like his second nature. It was clear there was a side to him they hadn't seen, intentionally hidden away. 

"Oh Ehm Gee, look!" Penelope clamoured. 

Spencer had had enough, dragging you towards the bathroom instead of the door like he'd initially intended. He'd tried to hold back, but you made it so damn difficult. 

"Where are we going? Let me go," you struggled in his grip, nearly tripping over your feet as he dragged you to the bathroom. 

"You clearly need to be taught a lesson in respect," Spencer spat, pushing you into the women's bathroom and closing the door. 

"Stop it, Spencer. You're acting childish," you scoffed, trying to push past him out the door. 

"I'm being childish? What was that back there, then? Flirting with my coworker in front of me? That's a new low," Spencer mocked. His body language was hostile and distant. He was feeling worse about it than he was letting on. He clearly had unresolved feelings about your situation, just like you did. 

"I didn't even know he was your coworker! Or that you were here! And you've ignored me every time I've tried to talk to you! You don't get to stake some sort of claim over me!" You defended. Did he really expect you to just wait around for him? 

"I'm not staking a claim! I just assumed we had an understanding!" Spencer's voice was rising with every sentence he spoke. The small bathroom seemed to only get smaller as he towered over you. 

"What understanding, Spencer? We only fucked once," you sneered, rolling your eyes. 

"Did you just roll your eyes at me?" Spencer's tone shifted, simmering anger underlined with something you couldn't place. You searched his face for emotion but only found his tightened jaw and eyebrows raised in question. 

"So what if I did?" You challenged, crossing your arms. He wasn't backing down, staring into your eyes. You felt your resolve crumble little by little. 

"Bend over," Spencer demanded, motioning to the sink with his head. 

"I'm not bending over some gross bar sink! Especially not for you," you tried pushing past him again, to no avail. His hands found your upper arms, turning you around and pushing you over the sink. 

"You'll listen to me if you know what's good for you," Spencer whispered in your ear. The dampened bass thrumming through the closed bathroom door had nothing on your heartbeat. 

You awaited his hands against your ass, but they didn't come. You stayed in the position he'd put you in, waiting. Spencer stepped back, and you didn't dare move a muscle. 

"Hmm, good girl. See how easy it is to just listen?" He ran a hand over your back, stopping at the hem of your bottoms. You didn't reply, waiting with bated breath. 

"Now, do you remember the rules?" Spencer made eye contact through the mirror. You felt yourself nod before correcting the behaviour. 

"Yes, Sir," you were quick to stammer the words. 

"Good girl..." Spencer trailed off, hooking his fingers into your waistband and pulling everything down to your ankles, leaving you exposed. 

He admired your pussy, kicking your legs apart to give him a better view and access. He wasn't wasting any time this time around. He placed his hands on your ass, squatting down to be at face height with your nethers. You jumped and tried to contain your reaction as he licked a stripe between your folds. Your hand slapped over your mouth, begging nobody could hear what was going down. 

"Wait, Spencer. Lock the door," you remembered. 

"Shut up. Did I give you permission to speak?" Spencer spoke against the warmth between your legs. 

"N-no, Sir," you answered. Your eyes darted to the unlocked door again, anxious someone might walk in. It was a public bar, after all. You wanted to question him. What if someone walked in? But you knew better, keeping your lips sealed. 

Spencer resumed with his mouth on your cunt, slowly devouring and driving you crazy. Tremors built in your legs as he sped up his advances. The wet sounds of his tongue lapping at your clit reached your ears, sending blood rushing to your cheeks. You clenched your eyes shut and balled your fists, doing your best to withhold your reactions. 

"Fuck..." The soft whimper left your mouth as Spencer sucked harshly on your clit. It was almost enough to send you over the edge. Almost. Spencer seemed to know as much, teasing endlessly. You wanted to beg, plead with him to make you cum, but you knew any words from your mouth would urge him to do the opposite. 

The doorknob clicked, and you tried to kick Spencer away from you. His grip on your hips was unwavering as he maintained his eager actions. 

The door flew open, and an unknown girl shrieked at the sight before her before quickly backing out the door. You'd hidden your face to the best of your ability, but there was no doubt what was going on. The least you could do to spare your dignity was hide your identity. 

Your heart beat rapidly in your chest at the intrusion. Even though you hated that you'd gotten caught in such a compromising situation, you couldn't deny it was a little exhilarating to know anybody could walk in at any moment while Spencer had his way with you without a care in the world. 

"You liked getting caught, didn't you? That's what little whores like you get off on," Spencer muttered against your pussy. You shook your head, denying his accusation. 

Spencer got off the floor, and you met his gaze through the mirror. "No? You didn't like it? Then why'd you get so wet," his words were emphasized by the fingers running through your sensitive folds. You whined at the sensation, biting your lip. 

"Fine, have it your way," Spencer sighed, leaning over and finally locking the door. The damage had been done, anyway. 

"Get up and turn around," Spencer ordered. You quickly obeyed, spinning to face him. Your ass pressed into the sink as Spencer stepped closer. He observed you for a second, his right hand coming up to cup your cheek in a strangely intimate moment. 

He quickly snapped out of it, bringing the hand down to your chin and gripping it tightly. You attempted to beg him to continue without words, but he was taking his sweet time. While his touch was no longer tender, the unexpected kiss he planted on your lips could only be described as delicate. A promise. 

His lips quickly moved down your neck, sucking harshly in any open spot he could find. His hand went up to your hair as he put the other on your waist. He tugged strategically, intentionally messing up your put-together appearance. This, combined with the trail of bruises he was leaving on your neck, made one thing clear: He was marking his territory. A fond feeling you wanted to ignore, perhaps to preserve it for later, bloomed in your chest. 

Spencer pushed you backwards onto the stone sink. You crossed your fingers it was a sturdy one, knowing what Spencer likely had in mind. He stepped between your opened legs, unbuckling his belt with one hand as the other remained on your thigh, rubbing the skin and driving you crazy. 

He reached into his underwear, tugging his rock-hard cock out of its confines. He held it tightly in his fist, stroking it as he kept rubbing his fingers closer and closer to your heat. You would've easily been able to take his teasing if he hadn't left you hanging on the edge with his mouth. The seconds he spent stroking himself lazily as he watched you felt like torturous hours. 

Finally, he made contact, tapping the head of his dick against your clit crudely. The sensation made you jerk backwards. He placed his length between your lips, lazily sliding yet never pushing inside. Every time the tip hit your clit with the upwards motion of his hips, a meek noise escaped you. 

"What would Luke think if he saw you like this, huh? Think he'd still be all over you if he knew you were such a little slut for me?" He accentuated his words by finally thrusting inside, pulling a moan from your throat. 

"Bet you'd like that, huh? Having him walk in here? Have him watch as I ruin your little pussy?" You cried out at his words. You couldn't help but imagine it. 

"But you're my good girl, huh?" The slide of his cock against your walls felt phenomenal. You felt yourself tighten at his words. The ridge of his tip got stuck on your entrance, and Spencer chuckled. 

"So tight for me. My pussy," he continued pushing inside, ignoring how you squeezed around him. 

"Say it," he urged. "Tell me who this pussy belongs to." 

"You! Belongs to you, Sir," you whined. You felt your body slowly slip off the sink with every push. You brought your hands to Spencer's shoulders as leverage to keep yourself upright. 

"That's right, all mine," Spencer moaned. His voice was raspy. It was the sexiest thing you'd ever had the pleasure of hearing. 

"Let me hear you," he coaxed. You took it as permission to finally speak. 

"Please, Sir, more," you begged. You no longer had control over your body, throwing your head back and nearly crashing it into the mirror. Your throat was quickly becoming hoarse with the pleas and whines escaping it. 

"More what, sweetheart?" The nickname sounded anything but sincere, just like the last time he'd used it in his office. 

"Fuck- Spe- Sir, harder, please," you were gradually losing your sanity. Your nails dug into the skin of his neck in desperation. 

He fulfilled your request, speeding up the momentum of his hips. You could only hope the music from the bar drowned out the sound of his balls slapping against your cunt with every harsh thrust. The wet squelches coming from where your bodies connected were vulgar. 

"Fuck, baby. So good. Such a good girl for me," Spencer babbled as he leaned forward to plant a messy kiss on your lips. You kept him close with the hold on his neck. 

You brought your hands up to his delectable locks, tugging harshly when he hit the magic spot inside of you. 

"Spencer! Oh my god, please, don't stop," you exclaimed. He continued pounding into you roughly. 

"Nobody can fuck you like I can, nobody will make you feel like I do," Spencer groaned. He was right. He'd ruined you for anybody else the second he'd set foot on campus. 

"O-oh, shit..." Spencer whimpered. If his rough voice was sexy, then Professor Spencer Reid whimpering in your ear in desperation as he neared his climax was on another level. The filthy whispers and sounds falling from his lips were enough to bring you back to the brink. 

"Fuck, Professor," you moaned. It snapped something in Spencer, whose hips stuttered. His pace turned brutal. 

"Say that again," he commanded. Who knew his official title would've set him off? 

"Please, Professor," you whined. The noises falling from your lips sounded foreign to your ears. Frenzied moans left you as Spencer brought his hand to your clit, rubbing circles in tandem with his thrusts. 

"Good girl," Spencer moaned. "Such a good girl for me." You could tell he was about to cum, mirroring your own predicament. 

"Fuck... Let them hear, baby. Tell them who's making you cum," Spencer's hips pressed hard against your own. 

"Spencer, oh- shit," you were no longer holding back. 

"That's right, cum for me." 

His words sent you over the edge, vision momentarily going black as your toes curled. You felt your legs shake as Spencer pushed inside one last time, cock pulsing as he shot his cum deep inside. It was concerning how quickly you'd come to love that specific feeling. 

He allowed you a second to catch your breath before he pulled out of you, tucking himself back into his pants and buckling his belt. He wasted no time, gathering some toilet paper from one of the stalls and carefully cleaning you up. He threw the paper in the toilet and flushed it, turning his attention back to you. 

He bent down, placing a peck on your mound. "All mine."

You scoffed at the action, pushing him away. "You sap." 

"Caught me," Spencer smiled softly, helping you off the sink. You pulled your bottoms back up, cringing at the wet feeling of his cum trickling down. 

"Spencer, I can't go out there like this," you gestured to your exterior. 

"You can and you will, c'mon," he placed a hand on the small of your back, ushering you to the exit. You did your best to rearrange your clothes to look somewhat presentable, but there was only so much you could do with your dishevelled appearance. The messy hair, ruined makeup and blotches splattered over your neck would be enough to give away what had happened. 

Your eyes searched the bar for your friends, but they were nowhere to be seen. You grabbed your phone, and with all the notifications, your suspicions were confirmed. They'd left without you. 

"Spencer, can you drive me home?" You tried turning to him, but he kept pushing you to the table where his team and Luke were still seated. Luke wolf-whistled at your appearance. You tried to shrink into yourself or to hide behind Spencer, but he wouldn't allow it. This clearly was some kind of dick-measuring contest to him. 

Spencer sat down next to Emily, pulling you into his lap. "Knock it off already. They get it," you groaned. 

"So, you're taking Spence's class? How's that working out for you?" The blonde next to Luke questioned. Spencer put a drink in front of you. You didn't question its contents, taking a sip before answering. 

"Well, I guess we had some disagreements over some of my work, but it seems we've found a way to work that out," you joked. There was no use in being sheepish about it. Spencer had made very sure they understood exactly what your dynamic was. 

"So it seems." Luke chuckled. You gave him an apologetic smile. He shrugged it off, raising his glass to clink it against yours.

Spencer's arm around you tightened. He'd 100% gotten his message across, but that didn't mean he liked you talking to Luke, or anybody, for that matter. If there's one thing Spencer learned from prison, it would be that sharing definitely wasn't his forté. Especially not you. No... You were all his. 

[ibetonlosinghuskies]

patience and pleasure pt 6

summary: as paige packs to move to uconn, she starts to doubt herself. grasping for a sense of security, she goes to the one person she knows can make her feel better. azzi.

disclaimer: as always everything i write is fictional!

warnings: fluff, angst, emotional distress, mild anxiety mention.

word count: 4.6k +

author's note: ik this probably isn't what you were expecting lol, very sorry. i will be giving yall what you want very soon.

~flashback to july 2020~

paige's pov:

i can't believe i'm doing this.

playing at uconn has been my dream since i was a kid, but now that it's finally happening i feel paralyzed. packing my stuff made things feel final.

i'm really leaving minnesota. everything i know is here.

who's going to build legos with drew? who's going to make my parents coffee in the morning?

my hands shake as i fold another shirt, memories flooding my mind. friday night games, late-night drives with the team, sunday morning cartoons with drew.

what if i'm not ready? what if i can't handle the pressure?

i'd been doing a good job keeping all this to myself. putting on my best smile for every interview, every photoshoot. i had a good enough support system too, my family, friends, fans. but behind every "congratulation", i felt their expectation. a standard of perfection only a prodigy could fulfill.

what if i let everyone down?

i can't let them see me crack.

it's not like i'm not grateful for the opportunity. this is all i've worked towards for years. it just hurts to leave everything behind, especially for a future i had no control over. i felt safe here, in this moment, i'm full of potential.

the weight of my potential weighs heavily on my shoulders, keeping me up at night.

i sink to the floor, surrounded by half-packed boxes. part of me wants to unpack it all, to pretend that time isn't moving forward.

my eyes snap up when i hear a knock at my bedroom door.

"hey kiddo," my dad says warmly, leaning against the door frame.

"hey," i reply weakly, putting on a smile. i feel his eyes scan my face, his expression warming with sympathy.

he knows my smile is fake.

"already packing? you don't leave for another week, it shouldn't take you that l—" he stops mid-sentence looking at my closet. "but with that shoe collection maybe you should've started a month ago," he teases, trying to make me smile.

"i just want to be ready," i say, sounding more insecure than i expected.

"it's okay to be scared, you know?" he starts, his voice gentle. "i know this is a big change."

"i just don't wanna disappoint anyone," i stand, continuing to pack my stuff, eyes glued to the floor.

"you could never disappoint us," he assures me. "we're all so proud of you, no matter what."

a mix of gratitude and homesickness rushes over me. i crumble over his words, a few tears escaping my eyes. walking slowly, he grabs me in his arms. we stand there for a moment, the heaviness of change lingering in the air.

"you know," he says suddenly, "i think azzi's still in town at her grandparents. why don't you give her a call?"

he's right, i usually visit her around this time of year. the thought of azzi brings a small smile to my face. memories of our summers spent together fill my mind—trips to the fair, month long sleepovers, sleeping in her clothes.

"not everything has to change, paige," his voice knowing, eyes gauging my reaction.

if anyone could understand what i'm going through, i'd be her.

"yeah, i'll give her a call," i nod, trying to shake my heartache.

"good," he says, walking to my door. "don't forget to leave some of your shoes behind. we don't need the whole state of minnesota wondering why there's a shortage."

i roll my eyes, laughing. "i'll think about it."

he gives me one last warm smile before closing my door. i take a deep breath, reaching for my phone.

azzi's pov:

i'm sprawled across my bed, scrolling through my phone when it starts buzzing. paige's name lights up the screen, and i can't help but smile.

"hey p," i answer, my smile showing in my voice.

"hey az," she replies, and immediately i know something's off. her voice is quieter than usual, lacking its usual charm.

"you okay?" i ask, sitting up straighter.

there's a pause, i can almost feel her forcing a smile through the phone. "yeah, i'm good. just...packing."

packing. right. she's leaving soon.

i'm hit with a wave of anticipatory grief. i've been trying to avoid thinking about what it's gonna be like when she leaves. we'd fallen into such an easy routine. she's spent countless summers at my grandparent's house, becoming part of my family.

"how's that going?" i ask, trying to sound hopeful.

"it's...going," she laughs gently. "it's just a lot, you know?"

i do know. the spotlight she's received these past couple years has been intense, but paige made everything she did look effortless. her confidence carried off the court, giving her a new charisma.

she was so easy to love.

"yeah...it's a big change," my voice matching her quiet tone.

there's another pause, the soft hum of the phone. i listen for her breath, a sigh, some background noice. but nothing. i feel her worry through the phone.

"can i come over—"

"you should come ov—"

we say at the same time. "i'll pick you up tomorrow morning," i smile at the thought of finally getting to see her.

i hear her take a steadying breath, "okay," her voice sounding a bit lighter.

my mind starts to wander. what if i don't see her again for years after this? all this time, and i never thought i'd have to confront my feelings for her.

"hey, i'll call you later, okay?" i'm sad to end our call, but i didn't have time to waste.

"uh yeah," she says, sounding a bit disappointed. "talk to you later."

i hang up the phone, my mind racing, filled with all of her favorite things. that minnesota lynx jersey she loves, her favorite snacks, the lego sets she builds with drew.

i can't let her leave without knowing how much of me she's taking with her.

i start in my closet, sifting through my clothes. my fingers brush against the fabric of my favorite hoodie—the one paige always steals when she's here.

i pull the hoodie closer to my chest, hoping that, for a moment, i could capture the warmth of her hug. a mixture of my perfume and her shampoo. i swear no matter how many times i wash the damn thing, it always carries a piece of her. like the intricate stitching holding the fabric, our bond sewn into the core of who we are.

i run my fingers along the seams—strong, resilient, trustworthy. i guess some things are too deep to be washed away. maybe it'll remind her that no matter how far she goes, a part of us will always be intertwined.

she should have this. it's practically hers anyway.

next, i move to my bookshelf, scanning the titles. my eyes land on one of my favorite john green books, looking for alaska. every once in a while she'd ask me to read it to her so she could fall asleep. paige always claimed my books were boring, but sometimes i'd catch her leaning in, eyes wide and attentive, consumed in the story. maybe she'd finally get around to reading it herself.

lastly, i grab some scissors off my desk and head for my front porch. the old basketball hoop stands sentinel, a silent witness to countless hours of our shared passion. i run my fingers along the worn metal, remembering all the times we'd scrimmage until the streetlights flickered on. our laughter and trash talk echoing through the quiet neighborhood.

i tilt the hoop towards me cutting off a piece of the net. the frayed edges feel like memories slipping through my fingers.

she was my champion first.

before the world knew 'paige bueckers', i knew paige. the slight competitive spark she'd get in her eyes before every shot. her confident sway as she played, turning my front porch into an arena.

everyone is finally gonna see in her what i've known for years.

back in my room, i surveyed my collection. each item, a different memory. i reach under my bed, adding the final touch to my gift—an old lego set paige and i bought together a long time ago. i put off building it with her, claiming we should save it for a special night.

there is nothing more special than tomorrow night.

i want everything to be perfect. i find myself frantically cleaning the house at 2 am, as if paige hasn't visited countless times. i organize my bookshelf, fold clothes, anything to keep my hands busy and my mind from wandering to her.

my exhaustion finally takes over and i lay sprawled across my bed. i try to sleep but she's all i dream about.

except these aren't the usual dreams.

a sequence of different visions flash through my mind, in each of them i'm losing her. we're on a basketball court, but something's off. paige is wearing a uconn jersey, looking different in a way i can't quite place. older, more independent. i'm still in my high school uniform. we're on opposite sides of the court, the air between us heavy. i call out to her but no sound comes out.

i want to tell her something. but my throat tightens, restricting like it's trying to hold her too.

i wake up before the sun, in a cold sweat. it felt so real, almost predestined. a heavy ache in my chest lingers, still unable to articulate what i need to tell her. the thought of my nightmares becoming real ignites a motivation in me to figure it out. fast.

i close my eyes again, hoping for dreamless sleep this time.

tomorrow, i'll find the words. i'll make sure i do.

paige's pov:

the sun peaks through my blinds, waking me up earlier than usual. awaking to the sight of half-packed boxes leaves me disoriented. but my heart flutters when i check my phone to find seven unread text from azzi.

i'm gonna miss stuff like this the most.

glancing at the time, i start to pack a bag to stay the night. she technically didn't say i was sleeping over, but i know us well enough to know that i will.

i start throwing things into my bag—my favorite hoodie, some shorts, and a pillow. then i pause, remembering the last time we hung out at her grandparents' place.

everything i needed was already there.

i empty half the bag, smiling to myself. the hoodie she'd always let me wear, my toothbrush, that book azzi's always bugging me to read, even my favorite pillow. they're all still at her place.

i'm reaching for my phone to tell her i'm ready when i hear my doorbell. smoothing out my hair, i nearly trip down the stairs running to answer the door.

i take a quick breath. even after all this time, i still want to look good for her. the moment i open the front door i'm met with azzi's smile, carrying two coffees in her hands.

everything i need is right here.

"i'm surprised you're not still in your pajamas," she smiles, handing me a coffee.

"what? no, of course not. i've been up for hours," i lie, letting her roll her eyes at my comment.

"mhm," she turns walking to her car.

i glance at her while she walks, her attitude showing in her posture. within just a few seconds, i already feel lighter.

the drive there is both long and short. as we pull up to her grandparents' house, i feel a wave of nostalgia. how many summers have i spent here? how much of me will i be leaving behind?

azzi's grandma is already at the door as we get out of the car. "paigey!," she calls out, her voice warm and welcoming. "how's our little superstar?"

"hi grandma fudd," i mumble, as she pulls me into a hug. i feel like a kid again in her arms.

"look at you," she says, holding me at arm's length. "more beautiful every time i see you."

i blush bashfully at her compliments. "hey, what about me?" azzi pouts from behind us.

"oh hush, you too," she pulls azzi into a deep hug. "i'm glad you finally came, paige. i was worried you weren't gonna make it this year. azzi here hasn't stopped talking about you since your last visit."

i shoot azzi a look, raising my eyebrows at her. she blushes, looking away.

once inside, memories pass me by like a warm summer breeze. the creaky third step on the stairs, the faded marks on the doorframe where azzi and i measured our heights every summer. old family photos lining the hallway, many of which include me.

azzi leads me up to her room, her hand gently tugging at mine excitedly. i let her lead like it was my first time in this house.

as we enter her room, i can't help but notice how clean it looks. her bookshelf organized by size and color, desk clear and neat. i almost miss the messiness of it all, the way her personality leaked all over her bedroom walls.

had she cleaned everything for me?

i scan her bedroom walls, all of which are covered in photos of us. photos from practice, summer trips to the lake, championship games.

her bedroom a museum of us, a bold testament to our bond.

"you kept all of these?" i asked softly, touching the corner of a photo from years ago.

azzi shrugs, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. "of course," she clears her throat nervously. "only because i look so good in them," she laughs failing to hide her affection.

i turn to her, ready to tease her about being sentimental, but the words die on my lips. she's holding something behind her, smiling with her eyes.

she takes a deep breath, bringing her hands forward slowly. in them is a carefully wrapped package, similar to the half-packed boxes littering my floor at home.

"i, uh, got you this. well, more like...put together." she hands me the box.

my fingertips brush against hers, heart racing as i look up into her eyes. "az, you didn't have to—"

"just open it, p," she interrupts, her voice soft and eager.

i unwrap the box, finally catching sight of its contents. it feels like all of the air has been sucked out of the room, it's all too much for me. her favorite hoodie, a worn copy of looking for alaska, a piece of frayed net from the hoop on her porch. and...is that the lego set we bought a long time ago?

all pieces of us, delicately put together in a small brown box.

"az..." i whisper, blinking away tears.

"i wanted you to have a piece of home to take with you," she explains, her eyes seeking my reaction. "so you didn't forget me—us."

i look up at her, my vision blurring the edges around her face. a warmth in my heart builds, surrounded by fragments of us. the finality of it all finally hit me.

how can we pack all of us into a box? years spent together, inseparable for the longest time, just to be neatly packaged in a cardboard box.

there's still so much i want to take with me. how do you package the sound of azzi's laugh? the feeling of her hand in mine? how do i fold up the comfort of her presence and tuck it neatly into a suitcase?

our friendship is a living, breathing thing. packing it away feels inhumane. she will never be a cardboard box i push into the back of my closet, the back of my mind. azzi's warmth pulses underneath my skin. she's the movement that pushes the blood through my body.

i realize something now. home isn't minnesota. it isn't my house or even this one.

home is azzi. and i'm about to leave it behind.

the weight of this box, however light in pounds, pulls me to the floor. my knees buckling underneath me, unable to form a coherent sentence. i'm drowning in a sea of emotions, waves of nostalgia and fear crashing over me. i cry, clinging to the box, like a life vest. my breath comes in short gasps, like i'm barely keeping my head above water.

i hear her call my name, but i can't respond. her voice feels far, muffled by my own emotion. i want to reach out, to tell her i'm okay, but my body won't cooperate.

azzi's hoodie wraps around me like a buoy, keeping me from sinking into the depths of my fears. the book, a raft of memories. the piece of net becomes a rope, pulling me to the shore of home—to her.

i can feel her worry radiate off her in waves, matching the momentum of my fear.

azzi's my anchor, solid and hopeful, grounding me in this storm. her hands cup my face, holding me like water, wiping away the flood.

her touch is gentle, safe. i lean into it instinctively, she always knows how to bring me back to myself.

looking up, i meet azzi's gaze. her eyes are a mirror of my own—a mix of worry, empathy, and something deeper. something that's been left unspoken between the two of us for a long time.

i feel her eyes search my face, a warmth that cuts through the chill of my tears.

azzi's looking at me like i'm her anchor too like she's just as terrified of drifting apart.

"paige, look at me," she says softly, also crying, wiping away my tears before her own.

i force myself to focus on her face. the wetness of her eyelashes, the trembling of her breath, her flushed cheeks—anything to slow my thoughts.

she sits on her knees, catching my tears in her palms. "you're not losing me, okay?" her voice reassuring, but also breaking between her tears.

"okay," i mumble sniffling. before i can thank her or apologize, she pulls my forehead to her lips. they tremble softly against my skin, her sadness showing but insistent on soothing me first.

azzi pulls my head into her chest, stroking my hair gently. i wrap my arms around her waist firmly, thinking that maybe if i hold her tightly enough, i can keep her here—in this moment, forever.

my tears begin to settle as i focus on her heartbeat, trying to memorize it. each beat a resilient promise, a faint whisper of trust, something to hold on to.

we stay there for a moment before azzi pulls back, staring at me with such a tenderness it almost sets me off again.

my eyes fall on the lego set peeking out of the box, and i can't let but let out a shaky laugh. "you're finally letting me build this," i smile, "it only took me almost moving away, huh?"

azzi's face breaks into a small grin, relief showing in her eyes. "like i'd trust you to build it on your own. someone's gotta make sure you read the instructions."

"hey!" i gasp in mock offense. "instructions are for people who don't know what they're doing, i'm a professional lego architect."

"oh we'll see about that," she jabs, opening the box.

azzi's pov:

as we build the lego set together, i can't help but steal glances at paige. i read the instructions to her but she's definitely not listening. already working at the pieces, her focus is unbreakable. her tongue pokes out slightly as she concentrates. it's so quintessentially her, it makes my heart ache.

the day passes by in a blur of laughter and shared memories. it isn't until i notice how dark my room has gotten that i realize we've spent hours on my bedroom floor.

"see, i don't need instructions," paige says, proudly showing off the part she's assembled.

"yeah, whatever," i laugh, admiring her confidence.

we're interrupted by a soft knock at my door, the scent of fresh-baked cookies wafts from behind the door. i open the door to my grandma, always the perfect host, holding a plate of chocolate chip cookies.

she smiles warmly, "i thought you two might want a cookie break."

paige lunges up from the floor almost pushing me over, reaching for the plate. "you're gonna have to send some of these to connecticut," she says, between mouthfuls.

she laughs at her comment, "i wanted to give you this also," in her other hand she hands me an old film camera. "maybe you can capture something special," she smiles before closing the door.

"your grandma makes the best cookies," paige's voice muffled under the sound of her chewing.

before she can react, i snap a photo of her. the camera clicking in a way that makes me giggle.

"hey, i wasn't ready!" she snatches the camera out of my hands. "you're always the model anyways," she says, snapping a photo of me.

i give her a fake smile, still reaching for the camera. "happy now? give it back," i laugh, chasing her around my room.

"not until you give me a real smile," she holds the camera above her head.

"that's not gonna work, we're the same height, stupid," i reach for the camera nearly knocking it out of her hands.

"one picture, with a smile," she takes the camera up to her eye to look through the viewfinder.

i give her another impatient smile. she kneels down dramatically, shifting back and forth while snapping photos.

"okay, my turn," i reach for the camera again.

"these aren't real smiles," she pokes my side, making me giggle. "see there it is, hold still."

i drop my smile and pout dramatically. paige moves the camera away from her face and lunges towards me, jabbing at my sides. "stop, paige," i giggle, swatting at her hands.

she dodges me, her fingers continue relentlessly. i push her onto my bed, using my body weight to keep her still. we fight for a moment squirming around my mattress before i pin both of her wrists down. satisfied, i grin down at her. our laughter comes to a soft stop and we're both breathless.

"see, was that so hard?" paige tilts her head to the side, still out of breath. she attempts to reach her hands up again but i tighten my grip.

"oh, whatever," i roll my eyes, leaning closer to her, my hair draping over her face.

"can i tell you something?" she starts, her voice sounding a bit more serious.

"hm?" i respond, still satisfied i could hold her still.

paige hesitates for a moment, her eyes searching mine. "i've never actually had my first kiss," her cheeks flushing a light pink. "i thought i would've by now, before college, you know?"

i loosen my grip on her wrist, "oh, i had no idea. i figured plenty of guys would be lining up to kiss the paige bueckers," i tease.

"i guess," she looks away bashfully, "i just want it to be with someone special. someone i care about," her voice lowering to a whisper.

there's a silence that hangs between us. i feel my heart pounding in my chest. "like who?" i ask quietly.

i need to hear her say it.

her eyes flicker to my lips briefly before meeting my eyes again. "like...you," she says nervously, almost asking it like a question.

was she saying what i think she was?

"really?" i lean closer to her, my eyes wide and hopeful.

she lets out a nervous breath, her eyes intently locked on my lips. "yeah," she whispers, blinking quickly.

before i can overthink it, she leans in, closing the gap between us. her lips meet mine softly, and my hands reach for her face. i feel a nervous tremble in her lips, soft and warm. the pure flavor of her lips, tasting like vanilla and chocolate. her hands move to my waist, her thumb swaying slightly. we move slowly, gently, not wanting to rush this moment.

our kiss is tender like a warm summer night. her lips move sweetly and determined like she's thought of this before. her hands stroking softly saying "i've wanted this. wanted you."

when she pulls back i feel a new kind of emptiness. how am i going to live with the absence of her touch? she's opened a crack in my heart, long enough for the light to come in.

kissing paige was like sunlight embodied.

we stare at each other for a moment. caught in this new in-between.

what do you say after you kiss your best friend? how do you tell her it was your first kiss too?

"i'm glad it was you," she smiles, sitting up.

"yeah, me too," i murmur, my voice full of emotion. i lean to the side, still dazed from her touch.

"it's getting late, we should probably—" she starts.

"yeah...um," i respond uneasily, standing up to walk over to my closet. i grab one of my old t-shirts and a pair of shorts. "you can wear these to sleep in."

paige takes the clothes from me, her fingers brushing against mine. when we touch this time, it feels different, heavier. she heads to the bathroom to change, and i let out a breath i didn't know i was holding in.

even being just a room over, it feels like she's slipping through my fingers. i'm reminded of my nightmares from last night, paralyzed by the thought of losing her.

i need to tell her.

i grab a piece of paper and pen off my desk, my hands quivering slightly as i start to write.

the first part of the letter flows easily. but as i continue, i feel a shift. the truth hanging in the space between my pen and the paper.

she deserves the truth. and i owe it to myself, to finally tell her.

my heart races, searching for the right words as i continue...

i reread the letter, feeling vulnerable under my own words.

what if this ruins everything? what if she doesn't feel the same way?

i glance at my bedroom door, knowing paige could return at any moment. the panic sets in and i make a split-second decision. my hands shake as i tear the paper in half.

the first part, full of friendship and encouragement. it's a bit more sentimental than usual but not enough to make her suspect anything. i fold it neatly, placing it atop the other objects in the box. it's safe, expected.

the second part, my true feelings for her. i can't bring myself to throw it away, but i'm not ready for her to read it either. i tuck the small slip into the final pages of the last chapter of the book i'm giving her.

maybe one day i'll find the courage to tell her. maybe someday she'll finish the book and know how i really feel. but for now, this feels safe.

i don't know if i'm hoping she finds it or not.

as i hear the bathroom door open, i quickly close the book, sealing my fate. my heart pounds with the weight of my unspoken words.

my thoughts cease when i see her in my clothes. she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, looking unabashedly herself. for a moment, i see our future. imagining our closets becoming one, holding her as she falls asleep, an endless sleepover.

how am i supposed to let her go?

she catches me staring and smiles softly, a knowing glint in her eyes that makes my heart ache. without speaking, we settle into our usual routine. i let her sleep on my favorite side of the bed, she shifts around, trying to get comfortable. eventually, she turns on her side, her back facing me.

right before i drift off to sleep, i hear her call out to me. "azzi," she whispers softly into the dark.

"hm?" i answer, struggling to keep my eyes open.

"can you hold me?"

her voice gentle and vulnerable, as if i could hold every piece of her together. "of course," i wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her in closer. she sinks into my touch, her breath slows.

she drifts to sleep quickly in my arms, our heartbeats syncing. the weight of our unspoken words between us, laying heavily on my chest, pushing me towards a deep sleep.

i dream of never having to let her go.

[i-write-sometimes-maybe]

Celebration- Lady Lesso X NeverFem!Reader (NSFW)

Synopsis: It was a night of many celebrations.

Warnings: SMUT. Alcohol consumption, kinda bratty bottom!reader, top!Lesso, some book descriptions, blindfolds, toys (vibe), denial, overstimulation, fingering, oral, biting, tears, tribbing w/toy, allusions to choking but not really, gets emotional at the end.

Word Count: 6.8k

A/n: Okay if I’m being totally honest, this kinda drags on (not in a bad way) because I have been lacking with motivation for smut, but it makes it’s incredibly intimate, so I’m not entirely complaining. I’ve been wanting to get this out FOR-EVER. Like longer than it should’ve taken. ENJOY 🥰🫶🏻

© This is my work, you have no right to repost my work for any reason without my explicit permission, all rights reserved.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

It was a celebration of sorts. The staff was celebrating many things. Goodness prevailed, Rafal had fallen, the schools had joined, and Sophie and Agatha had returned to Gavaldon.

In all fairness, you did enjoy having those girls at the schools, not to get you wrong, but you were more than pleased to not have any antics started by Sophie anymore.

As a Never professor, you should've enjoyed it, but seeing the strain it put on your Dean, it wasn't enjoyable at all.

Lady Lesso had to deal with the newest reader starting things and challenging her, while she also had to deal with her past not only being brought up again but reoccurring.

Because of this, Lesso was not herself. A little rougher with everyone, that part you did enjoy, but there was something hidden within her. And you wanted to know what it was, you wanted to comfort it out of her. To be the one holding her while she sobbed like you knew she desperately needed to.

The triumph of that is what Lesso was celebrating currently. She would've been more angry with Good winning, once again, but she couldn't bring herself to care after all these past few events she had to go through, again. Something about watching it happen to another, hardly able to do anything about it, was almost worse. Almost.

Dovey, on the other hand, was tipsy off of her one drink and bragging about the already-known information to everyone, all the Ever and Never professors. No one cares that Good won again, you merely rolled your eyes.

You desperately wanted to down a few drinks. Not necessarily to get drunk, you were no light-weight, but enough to make this little 'celebration' fun. But instead, you were just standing off to the side, people-watching as your first shot went un-sipped and warming in your hand.

And by people-watching, you were watching one person. Watching how Lesso smoothly drank her clean whiskey on the rocks, downing it a little sooner than she probably should. You wouldn't admit just how impressed you were with the way she handled her alcohol, downing each drink and acting as if she was drinking mere water.

You hid your slight panic when Lesso made eye contact with you. Her eyes darting to the glass in your hand and back to your eyes with a single eyebrow raised.

How'd she know that you haven't drunk anything yet tonight? Was she watching you the same way you were her? You didn't think you were being that obvious.

It was now or never.

Instead of making a fool of yourself, trying to come up with an excuse, you decided to just drink it. You weren't a giggly drunk, or a mean drunk, or the runaway drunk. No no, what you were was almost worse, at least according to you.

You raised your glass in her direction, feigning a toast, and downing it in an instant. You didn't quite catch how Lesso observed each move of yours as you downed the liquid, watching as a droplet of liquor dribbled from your chin and down your exposed chest, all thanks to the low-cut dress you decided on.

How you didn't notice her eyes glued onto you as you took one of your fingers and swiped up the alcohol from your breasts and delicately sucked it clean in a moment, she'll never know.

It was almost instantaneous, the moment the alcohol hit. It didn't make you dizzy or nauseous, no, it made you unbelievably horny. You still had your entire self-control, that wasn't the problem. You weren't a handsy drunk, you were simply a horny drunk. Not even a horny drunk, seeing as it happens with just one drink.

You couldn't tell if the immediate flush on your cheeks was from the alcohol, embarrassment, horniness, or the way Lesso was still looking at you.

It was probably the combination of all of them.

You set the shot glass down and tried to look away, knowing that if you kept looking at her or if you had another drink, it wouldn't help your situation.

The liquor went straight to your center the moment the liquid went into your stomach. An almost uncomfortable heat starts between your legs and spreading everywhere else.

This really wasn't the time or place for this, there was a reason you only drank in your quarters or why you quickly left when you did drink.

You tried to not think about your predicament, to not think about Lesso, but that was proven impossible as she made her way in front of you. Little did you know, your sudden uncomfortable shifting was obvious.

"Is there a problem, darling?" At first, Lesso was truly a little concerned but it shifted into something more when she noticed your thighs squeezing together at the pet name.

"Oh, not at all, I'm all good. Just, trying to make some fun with this so-called 'party'."

Her signature smirk appeared on her face, "I can help with that."

With a pulse sent to your already aching pussy, you would've sworn it was the alcohol. But you only had one shot, no way were you already imagining things. You can handle your liquor better than that.

"Wha-?" You thought that maybe neither of you was thinking straight, but that was quickly disproven too.

She leaned closer to your ear, not helping your issue in the slightest of ways, "I can help you with your little... situation."

A low chuckle emitted from her when your thighs squeezed again accompanied by an almost undetectable thrust of your hips, almost.

You smirked as well, seeing her smirk and hearing the melodious chuckle, reaching out to grab the lapel of her blazer and pulling her even closer to you, "Don't make promises you can't keep."

"Oh my pet, I intend to keep it." She pulled back to look at you once again, matching lustful looks on both of your faces.

Silent words were exchanged as she just grabbed your hand. Of course, you allowed her to pull you from the ever-dying celebration.

The walk back to her quarters was unbearably long. The remnants of your self-control had snapped once her door was closed.

You reached out for Lesso's tie again, this time wrapping it around your hand before using it as leverage to pull her closer to you. Your confidence increased tenfold when you saw how her pupils increased from your little action.

Lesso decided that the time you took to examine her sultry eyes was too long, no longer wasting time she pulled you into a bruising kiss.

You could tell with the way her lips moved on yours that she had been wanting this too, for at least as long as you have.

A breathy moan was immediately consumed by the redhead as soon as it escaped your throat, all due to Lesso biting down on your bottom lip, the action causing the wet spot in your panties to grow even more.

Lesso moved you back, pressing you against the wall, and placed her hand by your head, effectively pinning you to your spot, though you had no desire to leave.

She pulled back from you just enough to get a quick look at your now-flushed face, "My beautiful pet."

Before you could even think of some sort of response, she reattached her lips to your jaw, slowly moving them down toward your neck.

You wanted to whine at the speed she was moving but your excitement and the anticipation unknowingly stopped you.

You need to feel her, to have her against you, persuaded your actions as you reached out to hold onto her waist, just to have her as close as possible to you.

The closeness you two were currently sharing wasn't enough, you needed more of her. Just as her lips had made their way to the nape of your neck, you began pulling the blazer off her shoulders. A chuckle came from her at your eagerness, but all you could think of was that you wanted to feel more of her.

It was driving you mad.

When Lesso pulled away from you to drop the blazer, you allowed an audible whine to escape. Her deep amethyst eyes were looking into yours, causing you to get lost for a moment.

"Tell me what you want," She spoke softly, her tone sending chills across your skin.

You tugged her waist further against you, "More," You were beginning to be breathless, the anticipation becoming overwhelming.

"Tell me exactly." She continued to pry.

You bit back your desperate sigh, knowing that none of your noises would sway her into simply giving in to you. No matter how much she loved hearing them, or how badly she wanted to hear more. No matter how badly she already wanted you.

"I want to feel you. I want you to touch every part of me, make me fall apart. Make me yours." Your last statement was a mere whisper as you moved your lips to rest near her ears.

She may be the one who's currently in control, but she can't rid you of your confidence. Not that she'd ever want to.

She hummed, the same torturous smirk coming to her face, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you've imagined this unfolding before?" It wasn't a question, you knew that.

You tilted your head, "Well, do you?"

"Do I what?"

You smirked this time, "Know better?" Gods, the things she was going to do to you.

Her smirk turned nearly sadistic as she stayed unmoving, you began to fear maybe you crossed a line but that thought was diminished as she reached behind you to slowly unzip your dress.

You wanted to complain about the speed she was pulling the zip, knowing you could've been bare before her eyes with magic, but something about the way she looked into your eyes as she was doing it was oddly intimate. Yeah, you definitely weren't complaining.

Nothing about her wavered as she moved to pull the straps off your shoulders, the chill in the room finally running through you. But it was her touch that sent a shiver down your spine, the anticipation beginning to be overwhelming.

The dress fell off your torso with ease but caught on your waist. The dress, luckily, wasn't too fitted so with a little bit of your help it quickly fell the rest of the way to the floor.

Lesso wouldn't admit just how at a loss for words she was when she saw you, her throat going dry yet her mouth watered with her desires.

A few of your insecurities rose forward as she stayed unmoving, still staring at you, but all of your worries diminished when she spoke.

"You, are absolutely stunning," Butterflies filled your stomach with just how breathless she spoke those words.

You were left standing in a sheer black-lace bra, with matching panties, leaving not a single thing to the imagination.

"It's your turn, I think it's only fair." Your voice was just above a whisper, knowing that if you were any louder your voice would likely waver.

She played into it, leaning back slightly to watch you as your eyes raked over her. You couldn't decide what you wanted off of her first, you knew you wanted it all off. You decided on the vest, mainly cause that was the next thing standing between you and her bare skin.

You looked directly into her eyes as you popped one, two, and then the third and final button of the vest. You continued to watch as Lesso pulled it off her shoulders and let the garment drop to the floor next to her blazer.

Just as her hands went to the bottom of her button-up, you stopped her with your hands on hers.

"Wait! Let me, please let me." With a smirk, Lesso released the fabric, moving her hands back to the wall beside your head.

You pulled her closer to you with the loops on her trousers before untucking the shirt. Your eyes couldn't leave your hands as you watched, slowly more of her perfect body and porcelain skin was revealed. You could feel the anticipation making your head spin. But as your eyes remained on your task, Lesso's eyes stayed on you.

She loved how she could see the desire within them, the desire for her. Never, not once, has she ever felt more wanted than she has with you. You may not have realized it, but she noticed every single glance you threw her way, how could she not?

You still couldn't tear your eyes away from her, even once the the shirt was fully open, your eyes roamed across every part of her. A part of you was not at all surprised that she chose to abandon the common bra and go with the more comfortable sports bra.

A small smile formed on your lips as you noticed freckles on her chest, and a few peeking out from under the button-up on her shoulders, that was another thing that you didn't notice Lesso saw.

Lesso was taken by surprise as you swiftly pulled her flush against you, you wanted to feel her against you too bad to wait any longer. Taking advantage of this new position, you started leaving kisses on Lesso's neck, the sensation causing a hum to come from her. Chills had erupted across your skin, and unknown to you, across Lesso's as well, as you finally felt how perfect her skin felt on you.

You craved to hear all of the other noises she could make, that you could cause. And once you stepped out of your dress, you knew that Lesso gave in to her cravings as well.

She was no longer wasting time as she pulled you across the room to the awaiting bed, still perfectly made. That is, until Lesso's knees came into contact with the edge of the bed, prompting her to sit down. Her hands slowly ran up your sides as you moved to straddle her.

Though neither of you noticed, nor cared enough in the moment to pay attention to it, you knew that from this point forward neither of you would be able to go without one another. The addictive touch she laid against your sensitive skin, the chills she erupted just by the ghosting of her breath, you wouldn't be able to go without it now that you're aware of how thrilling it is.

Just as her lips came back to your neck, your arms involuntarily wrapped around her own neck to pull her closer against you, the feeling of her suckling your skin to leave a mark caused a breathy moan to escape you.

And boy, did that moan just snap the last remaining control Lesso had. In a blink, she had switched positions to where you were laid against her bed, hair sprawled out on the duvet and face beginning to flush, that was a scene she'd devote to memory.

"Gods, the things I'd do to you." Her eyes roamed over you once more.

It had been a hefty moment since you said something smart in return, you tsked, "You keep making promises, but I've yet to see results."

Lesso's eyes shot to yours at your audacity, only to see your eyes blown with lust. She'd be lying if she said this didn't have any effect on her.

"Oh, pet. We've only just begun."

You wrapped your legs around her waist, the slight friction was enough to make your breath hitch, gods you were so fucking desperate, "You're still wearing more clothes than me." You quirked your eyebrow, watching as a smirk slowly came to her face.

Instead of simply untangling you from her, she pushed your legs further up her waist. You had a slight pout when you realized it was your body that was obstructing your view of her unbuttoning her trousers and sliding them off. But your pout didn't last too much longer, not once you began to feel more of her soft skin against yours.

You had to fight back any possible sounds that you could've released as you saw her crawl back up you after releasing your legs from her, the way she did so was almost primal, stopping just at chest level. Your eyes could help but flutter a bit once you felt the warmth of her trailing kisses all across your chest.

Your hands instantly came up to her head, entangling in her fiery locks as she startled suckling on a spot just below your collarbone. A hum involuntarily came from you as you felt her hand roam up your side.

Just as her lips started trailing further down your chest, her free hand moved to your hip to steady herself. The moment she squeezed your hip was the moment she nipped the exposed top of your breast, just peaking from the top of your bra. The sensation was soft yet intense enough to make your head spin.

The near-silent whimper and tightening of your grip on her hair certainly didn't go unnoticed by the Dean.

"Pet, if you want something, you need to speak." You practically felt her words on your skin as she just barely lifted herself from you.

You took a stuttering breath, anticipation taking over your thoughts, "Gods, please, I need more,"

"Mmm, very good," She left one final nip to your skin before pulling back.

Lesso adored how much you were squirming, but she could tell you were trying to keep yourself from moving too much. And she unknowingly made it her mission to see just how much she can make you squirm, after all, she's just barely touched you.

She finally reached behind you for the clasp of your bra, able to do so with your back being slightly arched in attempts for more contact. The moment your breasts were freed, Lesso was transfixed. She would've taken longer to admire how the cold air caused your nipples to nearly instantly harden, but her desire to finally taste you was too strong.

She quickly decided that she was done wasting time, that she would take her tastes and bites with pleasure, hoping to soon see you fall apart. Sure, it was your pleasure, but it was her selfish need to watch her cause it. To hear you call her name as you finally come on her fingers and tongue.

A small moan left your lips the moment you felt her lips wrap around your left nipple, the sound becoming slightly louder as you felt her tongue swipe over the sensitive bud. Your hand moved to her waist, pulling her weight on top of you. Lesso didn't mind too much as it allowed her greedily to feel more of you.

You could feel your arousal becoming increasingly harder to ignore, and you just knew that you had long soaked your panties. Lesso had switched to your other nipple, knowing that she couldn't go without giving attention to both.

Lesso moved to the valley between your breasts, leaving a mark and starting a trail down to your navel. While this would've been plenty to make you even more desperate, her hands moved to where your thighs met your cunt, yet she never quite reached where you wanted her.

"Fuck! Leo, please!" Tears of frustration were starting to arise, "No more teasing!"

Something else ignited within the redhead at hearing the breathless whisper of her name.

"Say it again, say my name again."

"Please, Leo,"

She smirked, "Oh, how I love my name sounds coming from your desperate mouth." She nipped your hip, before pulling back and looking at you.

You thought you were going to get another remark or even some more teasing, but you were pleased to see and feel as she curled her fingers under the waistline of your panties and pulled them down your thighs, practically ripping them off past your knees and tossing them off to the side.

Lesso nearly moaned herself at the sight of you being completely soaked.

"It's all for you," You spoke breathlessly, watching how Lesso licked her lips before staring directly into your eyes.

"Oh pet, it better be all for me,"

You smirked at her tone, "Uh huh, and what if it wasn't?"

She got up to her knees and gripped your thighs, yanking you down the bed, you were nearly eye-level with her. The look on her face almost made you want to take it back.

"I'll show you." Your stomach filled with nervousness and excitement at that statement.

Before you could even realize, in the time of a blink, she was back between your legs. She swiftly pried your legs apart and pulled one over her shoulder.

It's like with your words, she had to prove you wrong. That she knew she'd have to ruin anyone else for you, anyone else but her. But she didn't have to try that hard, you didn't even think of anyone else but her already.

Your head fell back against the bed at the first swipe of her tongue, gods you were so fucking desperate.

A whole moan finally left your lips and your hands flew to Lesso's hair as she started devouring you as if you were her last meal for the next millennia. Her hands were wrapped around you and laid against your hips, her grip unrelenting and you knew you'd have marks to remember this time for days to come. Not like you were complaining.

Her tongue was expertly gliding over your clit, as if it already knew all of the spots that caused you to squirm. The suction and swirling combination she did stole the breath from your lungs.

"Fuck! Don't stop!" Your back arched further off the bed and Lesso could feel your pathetic attempt to close your thighs, it was blatantly obvious you were so close to your orgasm.

That blissful orgasm that you knew only Lesso would be able to bring. The very same orgasm she ripped from you as she stopped her ministrations.

You whined, tears of frustration brimming your eyes, "Fuck! Why?!"

"All for me, right?"

Your pleasure-clouded mind wasn't thinking straight, "What?!" Your back collapsed against the bed, your eyes searching hers for an answer before she spoke.

"Tell me, it's all for me. Tell me, that this pretty pussy only gets soaked for me. Tell me that you're all mine." She was looking square at you, her eyes going more dark with each word she spoke.

"Yes! It's for you!" She responded with a bite to your inner thigh, and a wince escaped you.

"Not good enough. Again."

"It's all for you, always for you," You paused to think about the words she said. "This pussy is yours. I'm yours."

A pleased smirk graced her face and she returned to your throbbing cunt again, she could taste your desperation, but she couldn't wait to taste your come.

Her tongue was swirling around your clit like it previously had, slowly building up your peak once more.

Just as your fingers threaded through her fiery hair again, her fingers started tracing your entrance.

"Please! More!" She didn't have to be told twice.

Two fingers instantly slipped into your pussy, all thanks to you being completely soaked. Lesso had never heard a more delicious sound before than at this moment. She couldn't find it within her to do anything that would potentially stop you from making more of those sounds.

She started thrusting her fingers at a generous speed, never ceasing her actions on your clit. Gods know you were nearly seeing white as she did so. One of your hands began fisting the sheets beside you, and you would've sworn you had torn them.

"Yes, Leo!" Your moans were motivation enough to keep her going, to ignore the strain of her jaw and tongue and ignore any possible burn in her forearm.

She had begun curling her fingers, instantly hitting the right spot within. And after a few brief moments, she could feel your thighs begin to quiver under her.

Just as you were about to voice your impending orgasm was about to arrive, she stopped. She didn't ease out of it, she pulled back.

The tears had finally fallen, "No! Fuck! Come on, please let me come!" You begged.

You begging with tears down your face was now Lesso's favorite thing.

"I told you, we've only just begun."

It may have only just started, but damn did you want to come. You still couldn't squeeze your thighs to relieve some of the desperation as her grip on your thighs hadn't eased.

You knew that what you were about to say would get you your way, "Please, I wanna come. I wanna come for you."

Lesso's eyes would've darkened more at that sentence if it was possible, you saw as she tried to bite back another smirk as she swallowed. You saw her head turn back to your thigh and you knew you had won as her tongue peeked out to taste your mid-thigh, trailing up back to your dripping cunt.

She resumed once again, continuing to swirl the tip of her tongue over your clit. You hoped that this would finally be it, that this would be when she finally let you come. You knew that this would be the hardest you've come in a while, if ever.

Your moans hadn't ceased since she returned to your needy pussy, and they only got louder as she inserted her fingers again. She was unforgiving in the way she wasted no time to gradually speed up her fingers, instantly going the pace and curling her fingers the same way that swiftly brought you to your near high earlier.

And just like before, it didn't take too long for you to get close once again. Your neediness with her speed and skill caused you to return to the edge of your orgasm quickly.

"I'm gonna come, please don't stop! I wanna come for you!" Your words were beyond rushed, hoping she wouldn't deny you again. Your grip on her hair became stronger, just as the shaking in your legs did.

Lesso did nothing this time but hum. You took that as her approval, that and the fact that she didn't pull away or stop again. You bit onto your bottom lip as your body tensed, though you quickly released it as you finally came with a curse and Lesso's name. Your orgasm hit you harder than a tsunami would meet land.

"Oh, fuck, Leo!" Your back finally had a chance to relax as your body fell flush against the bed.

Lesso slowly stopped her actions, allowing you a moment to calm yourself without stopping the pleasure too suddenly.

She started leaving more love bites along your inner thighs before she pulled back and looked at you.

"Do you trust me?"

It took you a moment to catch your breath, "What? Why?"

"Do you, trust me?" She annunciated.

"Yes, I do."

"Excellent." She said nothing else but summoned a black silk tie, which you assumed was one of the ones she frequently adorned. "This will go over your eyes," Excitement distracted your neediness.

"Say 'red' and I stop, got it?" She crawled up your body, moving to straddle your waist and you took a moment to steal a glance of her perfect body.

"Got it." She smiled and reached down, setting the tie over your eyes.

Soon, your vision went black. You felt her tie the tie behind your head and you couldn't wait to see what she would do next.

But she got up. You wondered if she was simply standing, observing your needy and pathetic self squirming on her bed all sprawled out and waiting for her. But you heard the sound of a drawer sliding open, you tried your best to hear any other clues as to what was about to take place but it was nearly silent.

Suddenly after a few moments, you felt her hands roam across your body. Slowly her hands worked their way from your thighs to your hips, up to your chest where they only stayed on your breast for a moment, much to your displeasure. Her hands continued up until one of them lightly wrapped around your throat. Only the slightest of pressure was added, but Lesso was beyond pleased to hear a whimper come from you at that action.

Her hand stayed in its place, the pressure in which it was wrapped around you increased slightly as you realized she was beginning to straddle you again. You registered that in the moment she was gone, she stripped the rest of the way as you felt her own wetness come into contact with your lower stomach.

"So beautiful," She whispered for the second time this night.

Her hand moved from your throat as she moved to be kneeling between your legs, but it didn't land anywhere else on you. You strained your ears to hear any hints and what she could have been doing.

But, you didn't have to strain too hard before you heard the start of a buzz, and you knew what was to come. But the idea of Lesso having one came to mind, the idea of Lesso bare on her bed using one caused a whimper to come from you and wetness to start dripping down your thighs.

"Oh, god!" You nearly screamed as the vibrator was pressed against your sensitive clit.

The vibrator brought you back to your high nearly instantly, all thanks to it being on full power and you being incredibly sensitive and desperate. You knew you couldn't take it if she took this orgasm from you again.

"Oh, fuck!" Your back arched to the point where your neck wasn't in contact with the bed any longer. "Please don't stop, I'm so close!"

"I'm not going to stop," Her eyes raked over you, loving how a layer of sweat adorned your perfectly heated skin. "If you're going to come, come."

With her near demand and the continuous stimulation, you couldn't resist. You screamed her name as you saw white. You tried searching for her to hold onto, but in the half second you tried and failed you simply relented to grip the sheets once more.

You couldn't catch your breath, the vibrator still being firmly pressed against your abused clit no matter how much your hips bucked at the stimulation.

"I-I can't-"

"I told you, I'm not going to stop." You didn't see it, but you could hear the smirk in her voice.

One hand stayed attached to the sheets but your other reached down in attempts to shun the friction from your cunt, just to give you a moment to breathe. But Lesso's free hand grabbed your wrist and moved your hand above your head.

"That stays there." Her time left no room to argue.

The vibrator stayed on your swollen clit, your thighs began to shake again but this time, not from denial. You felt Lesso grab one of your legs and move it atop hers and her other leg swung over you. It took you a moment but once you heard a delicious moan of her own, you finally pieced together the position you were now in, both of your hips were nearly connected.

Lesso couldn't ignore her own need anymore, she had moved you around her so she could have access to the vibrator too. And the mental image of this position, her between your legs and the vibrator pressed against both of your clits, just pushed you that much closer to the edge.

"Leo, I-I'm close again!" You were surprised that words managed to come out as you were so breathless.

Another moan came from the redhead, seeing your orgasm is one thing but this one, she'll get to feel it too, "Wait, wait for me."

And oh dear gods did that single sentence give you the willpower to hold off long enough so that you would get to come with her. You realized with this willpower came overwhelming pained pleasure.

Lesso was getting close to her own orgasm, rocking her hips into the vibrator. Each increase in pressure almost sent you over the edge but you'd be damned if you didn't get to come with her.

"You ready, pet?"

"Yes! Yes! I wanna come with you!"

"Go on, come pet," She was breathless too.

"Oh shit!" Your legs shook a bit harder and your hips bucked again.

That buck being the final push to send Lesso over the edge too. Your name falling from her lips luckily didn't go unnoticed by you, even in your near-blacked-out state.

You tiredly attempted to pull yourself up the bed, "Can't. Too much." You tried to speak, but your voice and body were weak.

Your body still had residual shakes as you heard the vibrator shut off and as the blindfold was removed.

You felt the bed beside you dip and you processed that Lesso was hovering over you. You looked at the care-filled face of the Dean for a moment before trying to focus on catching a breath.

You felt her hands come to your thighs, but before you could protest anymore for the night, her hands began massaging your twitching thighs.

There was a comforting silence that was shared between the two of you for a moment, Lesso still opting to bring sensation back to your legs.

You were finally starting to come back, you realized as your thoughts became more clear. And she realized too as your eyes began to look around more and lose their clouded appearance.

"How are you feeling?" Her soft voice was just above a whisper.

You looked from the side to her, seeing concern laced in her features, "I'm feeling damn good if I'm being honest."

She couldn't help but chuckle at that, knowing you had finally come back to her.

"Good, I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere." She added as she stood off the bed.

"Don't think I could if I wanted to." You simply responded, earning laughter from the Dean.

She was very much aware that you likely wouldn't be able to move, which is precisely why she got up to get the rag to clean you up with.

She returned with a damp cloth, wiping your sweat-covered face and chest before moving between your legs. The events left a mess all over your thighs, nearly to your knees, which is a first for you. Again, not like you were complaining. Lesso abruptly looked at your face when you winced the moment the cloth came into contact with your beyond-sensitive clit.

Lesso got rid of the cloth, still looking to find something that may soothe you.

"Are you thirsty? Would you like something to eat?" You smiled as she pushed some of your hair away from your face.

"I'm all good, I'd rather be close with you if you don't mind?"

"Of course, I don't mind," She said as she got back on the bed beside you. "We will have to shower tomorrow at least, we absolutely smell of sex."

You chuckled this time, "All thanks to you."

Lesso only had a playful eye roll as a response. You shuffled closer to her, wrapping your arm around her waist. You both still enjoyed the feeling of each other's skin on your own.

The moment was calm, neither of you quite ready for sleep as energy surprisingly still coursed through your veins. You delicately ran your finger over her side, a kind action that Lesso was certainly not used to.

Your mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Lesso, partly replaying the amazingly wild events that just took place, but mostly of her reserved behavior. Well, more reserved behavior. You knew that something wasn't right and you not only wanted to know what but you also wanted her to know that you're here to listen.

You moved your face up to see her a little better, watching for a moment as she stared up at the ceiling with a nearly undetectable smile on her face.

"What are you thinking about?" You inquired.

"Nothing, nothing at all." That was all she said.

You had allowed a few minutes to go by, mainly so you didn't possibly ruin the moment with your conversation, but you couldn't go any longer without addressing your thoughts.

"How are you doing?"

Lesso scoffed, beginning to sit up and sat on the edge of the bed. That response told you everything you needed to know, she wasn't doing alright.

You stopped her before she could stand up, "Look, I'm sorry if I crossed a line or if you don't want to share but I thought it would help. I know something is not right. And if you don't want to talk about it, I won't make you. But, I'm here for you if you do."

She looked over her pale shoulder at you, and you could see the start of a tear gleam in her eyes, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you actually care."

"Well, do you?"

"Do I what?" The Déjà Vu hit both of you at the moment she spoke.

"Know better."

She scoffed again, but this one was different.

"I do care." You added.

"I just, never thought I'd have to endure something like that again. So, I pushed it all down and-" She cut herself off and shook her head.

"Talk to me, please?" You sat up with her, ignoring the way your legs protested. "I hate seeing you hold this in."

She relented, laying back down on the bed, trying hard to not get close to you like she desperately wanted to, "I pushed all the memories down. 'Out of sight, out of mind', right? But all this just made me realize I wasn't okay, I guess."

You were at a loss for words at her confession, a part of you knew that's what was bothering her, but hearing it and hearing her emotions coating her words was entirely different from your expectations.

Since you had no words, you simply just laid back down beside her and pulled her onto you. Her arm instantly wrapped around your waist as she buried her face in your neck.

"I may not know exactly what you've been through, but I do know that you won't have to go through that ever again. Not while I'm around." You spoke with certainty as your hand returned to her hair, your nails lightly scratching her scalp.

A soft kiss was placed where her lips lay against your neck, "I know." You weren't sure how she knew, but you were glad to hear that she fully believed the words she just spoke.

"No matter what you go through, from now on you won't ever have to go through it alone. I promise you that." You were so disappointed that an amazing woman like Lesso had to go through so much all by herself, going through hardships alone.

She may be the Dean of Evil but she didn't deserve that, no one does.

"You can't really promise something like that." She whispered.

"Oh, I'm not going anywhere. Everything you go through, I'll be with you for it. You've already marked me and you can't it back." You gestured to your body, now covered in love bites thanks to the redhead.

You felt lighter at the sound of her laughter, "Okay, okay. You make a good point." You could feel her smile against your skin.

"I usually do." You planted a kiss on her hairline.

At this moment, with the admissions now in the air, you knew that though the future may not be set in stone you also knew that you'd be alongside Lesso. The way you both just poured your all into each other finally caused you to be calm enough to feel tired.

Your body feels full exhaustion, Lesso fully relaxed against you.

"I think it's time we get some sleep." You suggested as you summoned a light blanket to lay over your bodies, you knew that neither of you wanted to get up but you needed to be covered.

"Mm, me too." You would've pulled her closer to you if it were possible, so instead you just strengthened your grip on her.

Lesso may be this Evil being to everyone else, but she knew you never really saw her as that. And now she knew that you saw her for who she was. That you saw the humanity within her, and for that, she couldn't be more grateful. In the few moments before she gave into sleep, she vowed that she'd do everything in her power to make sure you'd know that she was there for you in the same way you were for her. She vowed that you'd never have to wonder if you're worth it.

But both of you vowed that the other would never have to be alone again, that you'd have the other beside you through it all.

🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮

Taglist: @inlovewithgreta @v3nusxsky @just-your-casual-nerd @pebbleswritessometimes @hxzxrdous @bigolgay @scream-queenlover @darkth1ngs @sgelessoanddoveykissing @i-like-reading

[yoonsdoll]

a love worth waiting for - chs

content : bsf!vernon x f!reader ; a lil angsty but fluff & happy ending ; 1.5k words warnings : vernon curses like 2ce lol - you are the most important person to vernon, but is it requited? an : i keep going on random writing hiatuses for no reason even tho i have so many ideas idek someone sos!!

vernon has loved you ever since he met you. as cheesy as it sounds, its something he cant deny whenever his friends ask him about, something he rants for hours about to his sister, something he finds himself thinking about more often than not. 

he remembers it like it was yesterday, even if its been years. it was an unusual meeting; seeing a pretty girl on a walk in the middle of summer would usually be normal, if only he didn't trip on a rock and land awkwardly conveniently on your path… and then make a comment on how his sister has the same shoes as you as if you’d care.

but you did. you made sure he was okay and laughed at his comment, then blabbered something about how your boyfriend has a similar hat to him. and, oh. he should've seen that coming.

of course he should have. such a put together, sweet girl would obviously have lines of guys lining up at her feet (or falling, in hansols case). but that didn’t matter - you only just met, you’d probably become friends if he asked for your number, that would be enough for him.

and for the first few months it was enough. you hit it off great, messaging each other often and even hanging out occasionally… well, when your jackass boyfriend let you. he hated your boyfriend - no, despised him. it wasn't even a case of jealousy; more of a genuine worry, at least for a while. he made it vocal on how he doesn’t like how your boyfriend controlled your life, but obviously supported your choices anyway. who wouldn't? you became his best friend, he would do anything to see you happy.

behind the worry he presented, vernon was stuck.

“i don't get it, why would she be with him if he's so.. controlling and mean?” everyday he called his friends.

“she literally looks unhappy, i feel bad and.. i dunno, angry... is that stupid?” everyday he talked about it, about how he wants to help you and, well, about you. “shes so… nice and pretty and forgiving. dude, he really doesn’t deserve her.”

until one day, “i could treat her better.”

he accepted it. he knew it wasn’t fair, for him or for you. everything leading up to that moment that he did, he thought it was simply sympathy. he put on this friendly act to not hurt your feelings, but maybe it was to not hurt his own. you wore your heart on your sleeve. it was obvious you were in love with your boyfriend, not him. and no matter what he did, that wouldn’t change.

soon you noticed the same things that vernon begged you to see in your boyfriend for a very long time. the gaslighting, restrictiveness, the bored attitude, and when you drifted apart it was only a waiting game till you broke it off.

vernon was surprised that the way his eyes sparkled when you came to cry to him didn’t give him away. truthfully, he couldn’t care less about the way it all went down or what he told you while you broke up with him. what mattered was that you were out of the situation you were blinded in. 

“he was a fucking dick,” no brainer, “its unfair - y'know, someone you love being out of reach.” those words sounded awfully familiar.

actually, maybe to him what mattered more is that he finally could reach you.

“i still love him,” you mumbled between your tears as vernon cooed at you.

he should've seen that coming too, and he couldn’t blame you at all - ever. but why did it sting so much more than the first time?

when he searched for your laugh after making a joke, you were laughing out of pity. when he comforted you, you weren’t thinking about him and how he was always there for you, instead you were thinking about yourself. when home to him was wherever you were, home to you was wherever your ex boyfriend was.

you just lost someone so dear to you and he was being so selfish. 

you two breaking up should've been the greatest thing he has heard in months, but instead he suddenly couldn’t help but feel like there was a bigger wall between you both than ever. 

of course, you never had feelings for him in the first place. vernon knew that. but something in him always held onto the possibility of you ending up together. not anymore, not after those four words left your mouth. he felt stupid for ever even having hope.

he paused to think before he spoke - something he rarely ever did when he was with you. “i know you do.” shaking his head gently, he added, “your heart just got broken, its a fresh wound, of course you still love him.” did everything he say have to apply to him too? it was almost humiliating in a way.

“its embarrassing… im the one who broke it off, i shouldn’t like him.” right, you felt it too.

at the end of the day, no matter who he was to you, you recognised him as someone you could trust. you spoke your thoughts freely, you were always by his side, you were his best friend; thats something vernon failed to see. he understood now to expect nothing but appreciate everything. because after all, being your friend would always be enough for him.

vernon promised himself he wouldn’t do or say anything stupid for your sake. he knew breakups are tough, and he knew that feelings don’t change in a day. he loved you, so he never would blame you for anything negative you made him feel. he wouldn’t blame you because you didn’t know.

or so he thought.

because months later when you arrived at his door looking more nervous than usual with a small smile on your face, vernon couldn’t be more confused.

“its almost 11pm.. what’re you doing here…?”

you let yourself in, setting your shoes aside and placing your coat on the hanger before grabbing his hand and dragging him to the couch to sit down.

“is it true?” 

“...is what true?”

“is it true that you have feelings for me?”

was that a trick question? “i mean..” he cleared his throat with a harsh cough, leaving the room silent for a few moments that felt like hours. “is that really what you’re doing at my house at 11 in the evening?”

“stop it. stop avoiding the question. just answer me.” 

“where’d you even get that idea from? dude i mean, you’re my best friend so if you’re asking -”

“you know what im asking..” your hands felt clammy, suddenly regretting knocking on the door after debating if you should for a solid 5 minutes. “i’m.. not mad or anything.” you added.

this was the million dollar question. he felt scared. “ha..” he couldn’t help but scoff to himself, “yeah.” though his tone tried being confident, the lack of eye contact and leg jittering was enough to see how nervous he truly was.

“im… so sorry,” you stared at him with your nose slightly scrunched - a detail he noticed whenever you were upset. “what? sorry? pfft.. theres nothing to be sorry for.” you figured he’d say that.

“im sorry for not noticing it earlier. i feel like an idiot.”

“no.. i feel like the idiot.” he quickly butted in, trying to take the blame, “you shouldn’t have to ‘notice’ anything. i should have told you ages ago so we could get past… whatever this is. i was just being a pussy and i -”

you admired his dedication to try explain but decided to stop him. “no vernon, im sorry for making you wait.” 

making him wait? “what are you even talking about? you didn’t do anything i swear…”

“maybe you really are the idiot..” you suddenly smiled a little wider, catching him off guard, “i meant i'm sorry for not noticing my feelings.. for you.. earlier.”

if he was confused before, he was now completely dumbfounded. the frown on his face wiped into a completely new expression. one of certain shock and hope, but with an equal amount of doubt. 

“agh..” you groaned in fake annoyance, feeling your cheeks heat up in embarrassment, “i’m telling you that i like you too.”

oh. for once, he didn’t see that coming.

“are you serious?” he mumbled out, struggling to process the consumed information, a million things going through his mind.

“no im lying.” you tilted your head, “obviously im serious, why else would i be here?”

“you’re right.. i don’t know why i said that.” he nodded, a smile forming on his own face, “im just… at a loss of words dude.”

he let go of a breath he didn’t notice he was holding, sighing from relief as he looked at you. no more words were exchanged before he moved closer to hug you. a hug of love, ease and joy.

“so.. can i be your boyfriend?” he whispered in a happier tone than before, the previous fear moulded into delight.

“yeah. i’d like that a lot.”

[riordanness]

change - [r.heffley]

1.6K wordcount

warnings: none

requested: no

I never would have guessed that the same day I lost my only friends would be the day I met my new one.

Heather Hills and I had been best friends since second grade. In fifth, Gracie Miller had made our duo a trio, and ever since then we'd been right as anything. Doing everything together, constantly hanging out and sleeping over at each others houses, planning birthday parties together and giggling over boys together.

But this year? Something was different. Heather and Gracie were acting strange. Like, I'd walk up to them while they were talking and they'd get all quiet, real fast. I'd catch them hanging out without me, finding out via social media.

I was trying to ignore the signs, acting as if everything was as it had always been. But I couldn't anymore.

At lunch earlier today, I'd suggested a visit to the mall after school. We hadn't hung out in a while, and I was missing my girls. Sure, we hung out at school everyday, but all the desks were two seater only. I'll leave it to your imagination who was the odd one out.

Besides, I was in desperate need for clothes. My mother had died when I was just a baby, and my dad was always struggling to make ends meet. I had recently grown out of basically all my clothing, so I'd been saving up every scrap of money I could, working odd jobs for all our neighbours, and finally had enough to go on a little shopping trip.

Heather wrinkled her nose. "I have a dentist appointment, and I'm too tired for the mall today."

I nodded. "That's fair. Get a good night's sleep, tonight, yeah?"

She gave me a tight-lipped smile. "Mhm."

I looked at Gracie. "What about you, Cee?"

She hesitated, glanced at Heather, then shook her head. "I- I have a lot of homework I need to catch up on. Sorry."

I smiled. "No worries. We'll find a time to go."

School had finished twenty minutes ago. I'd said goodbye to the girls at the gate, waved as they climbed into Heather's mum's car (Gracie always got a ride home with them as they lived basically next door to each other) and started the fifteen minute walk to the local mall.

Inside, however, I was met with a nasty surprise. Standing together at the smoothie bar, Heather and Gracie were giggling about something, drinks in hand.

I suddenly felt like I had no air. A lump grew in my throat, and I had to fight to not cry. I turn, and storm back outside. I collapse on a park bench a few hundred meters away, in a little sidewalk park.

Hot, angry, betrayed tears fill my eyes, and I don't stop them this time. I feel so stupid, so angry, so hurt. I should've known. I should have seen the signs, not ignored them like I'd tried to. They didn't want me around anymore. They didn't need me.

I don't know how long I stay there, crying, and silently screaming at myself.

Suddenly, I feel a hand on my shoulder. I glance up, startled, and hastily brush at my tears. My glasses have fogged up, a few tears staring the lenses. I pull a tissue from my backpack, and quickly wipe them clean.

"Are you alright?"

I glance again at the person. It's a boy, probably my age, with messy brown hair and pretty eyes. He wears a black tshirt with the words 'fuck the patriarchy' on it, with a blue and black flannel over the top. He has black converse, like me, and denim jeans, also like me.

"H-hi," I manage, my voice scratchy from crying. "Can I help you?"

The boy frowns in concern. "You were crying." He says it like a statement, not a question. Not like he's asking why I was crying, but rather just wondering if I was okay.

"I'm fine." I blink away the fresh tears threatening to rise. I won't cry in front of this cute guy again. Once is embarrassing enough. Twice would be unbearable.

"Okay," the boy says, in a voice that implies he doesn't even kind of believe me. "Want some company? You planning on going shopping?"

I frown slightly. "Uh, yeah. I need new clothes. I've been saving up."

The boy tilts his head. "What size are you?"

My eyes widen in surprise, but before I can speak he yelps a little, holding his hands up in surrender.

"I mean- No! I didn't mean it like that. It's just- I just- I have a lot of spare things I don't wear anymore and well, you look like you might fit them. No use using your savings if you don't have to."

I consider this. Usually I don't like charity much, it makes me feel like a desperately poor person, when I'm not poor, just short on cash. But this boy seems really genuine, and I like his style, so maybe the offer of old clothes is a good one to accept.

"Sure, I'd love that," I say. "I'm Y/n." I stand, holding out my hand to shake.

He smiles, and my day gets just a little brighter. "It's lovely to meet you, Y/n. Now c'mon. I'll drive you to my place."

I follow him to the carpark, and he opens the shotgun door of a white van, marked with "Löded Diper" on the side.

"Should I be worried about getting into a white van belonging to a total stranger?" I ask teasingly.

The boy laughs. "Nah, you're good. The only people I'm kidnapping with this van are my little dork brother and his friend."

I laugh, climb into the van, and let him shut the door. When he slides into the drivers seat, I look over at him.

"You know, I still don't know your name."

He looks at me with a mischievous glint in his eye. "Would you believe me if I told you my name was Sir Lancelot Broccoli Vladimir the First?"

I pretend to consider it. "Hmmm, no, not really."

I look at him, and for a whole second we hold the serious act. Then we explode to a fit of laughter.

"No, but really," I manage, striving for composure. "What is your name?"

"Rodrick," he says. "Rodrick Heffley."

"Well it's lovely to meet you, Rodrick Heffley."

He grins. "Okay, Y/n Whatever-Your-Last-Name-Is, ready for a dangerous drive back to my place?"

I raise an eyebrow. "Why not?"

In hindsight, I would've preferred walking there, but Rodrick, and his eyes and his smile and his laugh, they made the almost terrifying experience of his driving kinda worth it.

His house was simple and white, the yard pretty but plain. It looked like a totally normal home.

Rodrick opens the front door for me, holding it open as he smiles down at me. I return it as I duck under his arm, and step into the hallway.

A women steps into the hall, a small boy in her arms. She's pretty, with glasses and shiny brown hair. she sees me and smiles in pleasant surprise.

"Oh, hello there." She steps over and hold her hand out. "I'm Susan. It's lovely to meet you."

As I shake her hand, she glances at Rodrick, a thousand questions in her eyes.

"She's a friend," Rodrick says. "Don't make it weird, Mum."

She smiles. "Oh no no, I won't, honey, I promise."

"Come on, Y/n," Rodrick says, and grabs my hand, steering me away from his mother.

We climb the stairs, passing an adorable dog (who wanted pats that I'd gladly given) and a younger brother, who doesn't give us a second glance.

Upstairs, we enter Rodrick's room. It's surprisingly tidy for a teenage boy's. He has a drum kit, a lot of rock band posters and magazines, and a few piles of clothes and school supplies.

"You play?" I ask, gesturing at the drums.

Rodrick smiles shyly, his gaze sliding to meet mine. "Uh, yeah. I'm in a band."

I raise an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? That's sick, man. I wish I could play the drums. But I've never had the money to get my own kit or anything."

"I could... teach you if you'd like?"

At his suggestion, I hesitate. "I couldn't pay you..."

Rodrick gives me a look. "As if I'd charge you, love."

I flush, and look away.

"Okay..." Rodrick gets all embarrassed, turns in a circle, then digs through his closet for a moment. He pulls out a small tub of neatly folded clothes (I suspect his mother folded them for him), and places it on his bed.

"Here ya are, Y/n/n."

"Y/n/n?" I ask with a small laugh. "That's a new one."

"Is it?" he asks curiously. "So I'm the only one to ever call you that?"

I nod. "Yep, pretty sure."

"Good." He smiles. It's contagious, so I smile right back at him.

"Now," he says, pushing the box towards me. "Take whatever you like."

It's filled with mostly tshirts and hoodies and sweaters, which is perfect, as I have basically no need for new jeans at the moment.

I pull one of the hoodies on, a maroon one with the words "you and i got lost in it" in small, simple writing down one sleeve. It's almost a perfect fit, just a little bit big in all the right place.

"Are all the clothes in this box the same size?" I ask, and Rodrick nods, but he can't tear his eyes away from me.

"What is it?" I laugh.

"N-nothing," he stammers, his cheeks tinting pick and his voice going higher. I bite back an amused smile, and just give him a little meaningful look.

"It's just..." he sighs. "You just look really damn pretty in my clothes."

I instantly get flustered, but can't help my smile. This afternoon might have started pretty awfully, but I could tell it was going to be an amazing night.

[beybaldes]

the woman that loves you (boy you're such a fool)

Eddie Roundtree x Fem!Reader

djats masterlist

Word Count : 3.1k

Summary : the end of the band is just the beginning for y/n and her favourite bassist.

normal = flashbacks ,, italics = interviews

Warning!! I have not read the book or the show!!! All info I have gathered has been from other x readers I have read. sorry in advance if I have butchered your fav show/book because i have plainly made shit up in favour of satiating my own need for more Eddie fics xoxo

Y/n: I think about that last day all the time. I think about everything I should've said or done. But I don't think it would've changed anything honestly - everyone seemed pretty set on what they wanted for the band. Who was I to change that?

your legs pulled from warrens lap, quickly jumping from you seat and running out of the bus, desperate to reach the cab before it could pull out and take Eddie away. whatever was out there had been on your side, your hard pull open of the door stopping the driver from leaving as he put it into gear and got ready to leave.

"I'm so sorry" you said to the grey haired man in the front seat, turned to Eddie with a creased brow. "I'll only be a minute."

"birdie..." he hummed, pushing his sunglasses away from his eyes, letting them meet your own. "let me go, I need to leave, I can't stay here - not with Billy, not after everything."

"I'm not asking you to stay, Ed's." You murmured, tears brimming your eyes as you placed one knee into the cab, tucking yourself into the crook of his neck, one arm holding the door open. "I know that's not fair. I just don't want you to leave without saying goodbye."

Though you couldn't see it, tears began to pool in eddies eyes at the way your voice trembled and your words came out in a whisper - like a little kid too upset to really get the words out. When he'd packed up his things and called the cab he had only thought about leaving, getting away from all of it and getting to be his own person - he'd yet to consider that he'd be leaving some of his nearest and dearest friends behind in doing so. That he'd be leaving you behind.

Eddie: I'd never done anything as hard as leaving the band. At least not until y/n stopped the cab to speak to me.

"I got to go birdie, I got a plane to catch." soon half a continent would separate you, something so scary when for the last decade you'd only been a street, a room or a curtain away at all times.

"Just gimme one more moment." You tried to savour the feel of his arms around you, holding your body tight and close as if it was the last time he was going to do so. 'it probably was the last time he was going to do so,' the thought made your stomachs churn and your whimpers boarder on full on sobs. If it weren't for the fact you wanted your last moments together to be happy, you would've just let it all out, cry into his arms like the little kid your rise to fame never let you be. "Just one more moment."

Camilla: Y/n. She, she was always the closest with Eddie. They were like two peas in a pod - I don't think I'd ever seen one without the other somewhere nearby.

With a particularly tight squeeze, you pulled away, knowing that no hug would last long enough to satiate the longing ache already settled deep in the pit of your stomach.

Eddie was quick to wipe at the tears that silently rolled down your cheeks, his large hand cupping your face as his thumb stroked across the apple of your red cheek. "I'm gonna miss you, birdie."

"Not as much as I'm gonna miss you, Ed's." You pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, trying to tell him everything you didn't have the time to say in what could easily be passed off as a misjudgement of closeness. "Please don't be a stranger."

Eddie didn't say anything else. He let you close the cab door and stand on the side of the pavement, watching as he drove off and away from the six, away from you. Only when the cab was out of sight did either of you let the tears fall, not wanting the other to be saddened by your own heartbreak. Though, when had goodbyes ever been easy?

Billy: Y/n had always been a sensitive girl. But the band had been her whole world - each of us, we, had been her whole world. I think it truly broke her when the band broke up that day.

Furiously you wiped at your tears, trying to clear your face before you returned to your seat on the tour bus, knowing now that it was unlikely the six would continue past this moment, and that more goodbyes would probably be in order. You could cry it all out on the flight you were sure you'd have to book later today.

Making your way back to the tour bus, you silently got back on, not even making it to your seat before you broke down in tears again. Your knees couldn't hold your weight any longer, and as you began to sink to the floor, Warren was quick to spring from his seat, wrapping you in his arms and lowering you to the floor at a gentle pace. He gently stroked his fingers through your hair, shushing you as the pair of you rocked back and forth on the floor of the tour bus. Karen was quick to join the two of you, pressing a kiss to your temple and letting her own tears fall in the group hug containing the final members of the 6.

Y/n: Karen and Warren - I'd always been good fiends with them. But that day, on the bus, it became something different then. They're my best friends in the world now. Karen was the maid of honour at my wedding. I did ask Warren but he refused, claiming it only made sense for it to be Karen.

"It's okay sweet girls." Warren whispered to the two girls that were now cradled in his arms, all three of the in a mess of limbs and tears on the floor of the tour bus. "Everything's going to be okay."

"Warren had been right of course." You paused with a smile, waiting for Julia to adjust the camera so that both you and Eddie fit into the frame; his arm wrapped around your waist pulling you into his side, a kiss pressed to your temple after which he gazed down at you lovingly. "Everything was okay, in the end. Eddie called me the second he landed back in Pittsburgh, correctly guessing I'd still be on the tour bus with Warren and Karen."

"Thank god I'd been right (about the tour bus)." Eddie smiled, pressing another kiss to your temple, relishing in the feel of his arm that was around your waist, knowing he'd never have to lose that feeling as long as he played his cards right. "I don't know what I'd have done if she hadn't picked up. If I'd lost her for good."

"Hello." You murmured into the phone, the loud ringing having woke you from your sleep. Thankfully, Warren and Karen were still asleep to your right, the ringing noise not waking them after the exhaustion of getting through such an eventful and emotional day. "Who is it?"

"Birdie..."

You sat upright at the voice on the other end of the line, sleep vanishing from your eyes. "Eddie." You whined, fingers scratching at the phone as if you could claw you way through it and into his arms. "I miss you."

"I know birdie, I miss you too."

"How'd you know to call here?" You and Karen were crashing in Warrens room, the three of you too upset to be left alone and not wanting to pay for three separate rooms when money was now going to be an issue.

"I figured you'd end up in bed with Warren, or Karen, or both. I called each room until you picked up." A soft smile graced your features at the thought of Eddie calling every room until he found you. He knew you so well. "I'm back in Pittsburgh, I want you to come with me."

It had taken Eddie seconds to realise the mistake he'd made in leaving the band. Not in the way of leaving the band, but rather in the way it meant leaving you, too. But his cab was going and his flight had been paid for.

"I... I love you, birdie." Eddie whispered, unsure if he was allowed to say such words after how hard he'd made you cry just hours before. "I don't want to not have you in my life. And I'm not calling just because I need someone right now, or because I regret leaving the band. I'm calling because I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you in it, and when you realise that you do something about it."

Eddies words had you shocked to silence, his voice calling out for you several times in the moments that you took to process what he'd just said. "Birdie, please say something."

"I'll tell you I love you too when you pick me up from the airport tomorrow at 11."

You could feel the smile that filled Eddies face through the phone.

"Am or Pm?"

Your hand interlinked with Eddies as you let your head fall to his shoulder, wrapped up in the memory of your first day out of the band. "It was difficult to say goodbye to Karen, her flight going back to England when both mine and Warren's were going back to Pittsburgh. It hurt a lot to see her go."

"I was in tears the whole flight." Karen laughed, wiping away a stray tear as she recalled when you and Warren left her at the gate to get your own flight. "But I called y/n as soon as I landed, and she told me she'd already booked flights to come and visit in a month. She's always been so good to me, to all of us, like that."

You'd slept on Warren's shoulder for most of the flight, his head atop yours as your dreamt about what life would bring going forward. Neither of you wanted to stay in Pittsburgh, but knew it was right for the moment, to take a deep breath and remind yourself of who you were before the band - without the band. Warren's long-time girlfriend, Lisa, had been the first person you saw once you escaped baggage claim, her running into his arms the moment she spotted him, but not forgetting to give you a hug of your own and a kiss to your cheek.

"My girl now, Rojas." You teased, pulling Lisa into side hug, hear head falling to your shoulder with a bright smile.

"Already forgetting about me?" You were quick to turn around at the sound of Eddie's voice, dropping your luggage and crashing into his arms, pressing kisses to his cheeks again and again, only stopping when he placed two fingers under your jaw and turned you to face him, finally giving you a real kiss after years of dancing around each other.

"Finally!" Warren shouted, head thrown back in laughter as he watched the two of you address all those lingering looks and hugs and touches that had happened over the past few years. "I better be invited to the wedding!"

"She told you that?" Warren scoffed, pulling the lit cigarette from his mouth, tapping the burnt butt into his ash tray before replacing it between his lips. "I only refused to be her maid of honour because Eddie asked me to be his best man first. How could I say no to being her maid of honour otherwise?"

"I love you too." You gasped out, pulling away from the kiss with Eddie. "I love you too. I love you so damn much it keeps me up at night, you're all I think about, all the time."

"I love you even more then that, birdie." Eddie nuzzled his nose against yours, quick to pull you in for another kiss that had Warren shouting at the pair of you to 'get a room.'

"Y/n did fulfil her promise." Karen nodded, thinking about her life long friendship with the brunette she'd met by chance. "She came to visit three weeks later. I was so excited. We spent a lot of time taking about the solo career I'd been planning for myself and how she could come along, be my opener for the American leg of the tour I would hopefully do - I didn't even notice the ring on her finger until her third day there!"

"I proposed the same night she got back to Pittsburgh. The girl had just flown halfway across the country cause she didn't know how to be without me, and I'd practically begged her to do it because I didn't know how to live without her. How could not?" Eddie retold with a soft smile gracing his features. It was one of the things you'd come to love the most in his old age; how soft and loving his features were when we wasn't stressing about the six, or Billy.

"I can't believe you came all this way, for me." Eddie mused later that night, the two of you face to face in his childhood bed, not wanting to fall asleep in fear this would all be some dream.

"How could I not?" You asked, pulling one of your hands out from beneath the duvet, pushing a strand of Eddies overgrown hair out of his eyes and safely behind his ear, careful to avoid brushing against the black eye nursing on his cheek. "Like you said, Ed's, I want to spend the rest of my life with you in it. Why would I wait to start the rest of my life when I could start it right now?"

Eddie pressed a hot and firm kiss to your lips, pulling away and resting his forehead against you own, a lovesick smile gracing his face. "You're exactly right birdie. Exactly right." Another series of kisses were pressed all over your face, starting at your lips, moving to your cheeks, then your forehead and back to your lips again. "Why wait when forever can start right now?"

Eddie pulled off one of his rings, holding it out in the small gap between the two of you. "Marry me."

It hadn't been a question.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I have no doubt in that. And I know more then anything, I want the rest of my life to start right now; I've spent years not doing that, and I don't want to wait another day. Marry me."

"It was quite the bold ask." You giggled, curling into Eddies side with a bright smile. "But who could say no to such a face?"

"Yes." You whispered into the darkness of the room you'd spent so many of your formative years in. "Yes." Eddie slipped the ring on your finger, pressing another series of hot and firm kisses all over your face.

"He promised to go out and buy a real ring the following morning." You explained to Julia, sticking your hand out towards the camera to show her that your engagement ring was just as simple of a band as your wedding one. "But I told him a didn't want one. This one meant more."

"She gave me that ring as a gift for my 15 birthday." Eddie mused, reaching for you hand and toying with the ring that'd sat on your finger for the last 20 years. It should've sat there for a lot longer, he thought. "It seems kind of full circle that it's ended up back in her possession. But she wouldn't have it any other way."

"I was happy for them, y'know." Daisy smiled, thinking back onto the pictures you'd sent her of your wedding day, her choosing not to come to keep any peace you may have had that day. "Glad to see more then just Warren came out of the band happy. Really happy."

"We only had a small wedding." You explained, the day feeling minutes ago rather then almost 20 years ago now. Where had the time gone? "Warren and Karen came, but everyone else didn't. I asked Cami to come, but she felt it'd be better if she didn't. I understood of course, things were different then, but it hurt me a lot - that the people I'd spent everyday of the few years of my life with didn't want to come to my wedding."

Eddie squeezed your hand tighter, pressing a kiss to your hair. "It was a hard day for y/n. But despite everything, we had the best time; it was the perfect day, honestly."

"Everyone came to visit sooner or later, one at a time, to congratulate us, apologise for not coming. Graham was the first to come and visit." You let out a low laugh as you dwelled on the memory. "I wish I had a photo to show you of the face he made when he realised I was pregnant."

"I'm sorry... what?" Graham choked out, unmoving in the doorway to your house as he stared at the baby bump that had formed under your summer dress. "Since when were you pregnant?"

"It wasn't the way I meant to say it." Graham denied. "It had been about 4 months since the band broke up, and only 1 month since they got married. I was just surprised!"

"Since just over 3 months ago." You laughed, pulling him into your house with a kind smile, taking hold of his bag for him and leading him towards your guest room. "Don't tell Eddie, but I think it's a girl."

"Oh! Of course she did!" Eddie laughed, his head thrown back over the cushions of the loveseat the two of you were cuddled on. "Though, not that I said anything at the time, I knew it was a girl."

"I'm sure you did." You nudged Eddie in his side, intertwining your fingers with his and letting your head fall to his shoulder. "Our Janie was born 6 months later. She was beautiful. 6 pounds and 8 ounces."

"She just started college last year, it's weird for the house to be so empty." Eddie added, a slight frown settling into his features. He missed Janie every day she was gone, that little girl - his little girl - being the absolute light of his life.

"You didn't have any other kids?" Julia asked, head peaking up just over the top of the camera she was recording the two of you with.

"No. Just our Janie. She was perfect. We didn't need another. Spitting image of her mother, with my rocking personality." It was moments like this, where Eddie spoke so fondly of you, your daughter, your family, that you knew - despite the hurt the band caused you across the years - every second had been worth it.

"Yeah, it was perfect. All perfect."

[jenniferjareauwife]

can you write a jj x reader or Carina x reader based on the song Sara by we three and can you make the reader survive please

Sara

pairing: jennifer jareau x fem reader

category: fluff, hurt/comfort

warnings: depression, suicide attempt

word count: 816

summary: based on the song sara by we three

I took another drink while staring straight at the wall, my FBI issued gun sitting on the counter. JJ wasn't supposed to be home until later and I was alone in every sense. I was on my fourth drink of the night, just to keep my finger off the trigger.

I wasn't even phased when I heard JJ come through the door. I was so out of it that I probably should've jumped but I was so drunk and focused that nothing could pull me out of it. "Hey."

"Hm." I grunted.

"Whatcha drinking?"

"Whiskey."

"Oh." She set her bag down and walked towards me. She knew I only drank whiskey on bad nights. "What's wrong?" She took one whiff of my breath and her nose wrinkled. "How many drinks have you had?"

"Four."

"Still level headed." She said quietly.

"Mm." I leaned back against the couch, taking another sip before she took the glass out of my hands.

"Seriously. What's wrong."

"Nothing."

"If it were nothing you wouldn't be drinking like this-"

"I'm fine-"

"You're not-"

"Just stop." I felt a single tear roll down my cheek but I couldn't bring myself to wipe it away so she did. "Nothing numbs it anymore." I whispered weakly. I saw her freeze out of the corner of my eye once she saw my gun. I usually kept it locked in my nightstand so keeping it down here was unusual.

"I'm gonna go upstairs, ok? I'll be right back." She grabbed my gun and I took in a sharp breath, I didn't really care anymore. I wasn't gonna pull the trigger while she was here, I wouldn't do that to her.

Once she came back downstairs she curled up on the couch next to me, wrapping her arms around my torso and resting her head on my shoulder. "I love you." She kissed my jaw once and then fell asleep.

Two weeks later I was sitting on the floor of our bathroom, my knees pulled up to my chest. JJ wasn't home again, she almost never was anymore. I knew she would come if I called but she didn't need to be burdened with this. She didn't need to be burdened by me anymore, it's not fair for her to have to put up with me everyday and constantly worry about me just because I can't handle my fucking emotions and my stupid brain.

I grabbed a notepad and wrote down a letter to JJ. I should at least leave her that. Then I took a razor and slit my wrists. It was the easiest decision I had ever made and that didn't even scare me until my vision was blurring and went black.

I woke up in a hospital bed, two warm hands gripping one of mine. The lights were almost blinding as I slowly opened them. "Hey." I turned my head to the side slightly and saw the most beautiful woman ever. JJ. I smiled softly.

"Hi...why am I here?"

"I found you...in our bathroom." She didn't say anything else. I saw her tear up and I wanted nothing more than to wipe her tears away but she didn't let me let go of her hand. "Don't...don't I need this." A few tears fell down her cheeks. "I thought I lost you!"

"I'm-"

"I don't want to hear apologies, ok? Don't apologize for how you feel. Don't ever do that."

"But I-"

"Do you regret it?"

"Um...yeah. Now I do. But I didn't...I didn't when I did it and...I didn't even feel bad. It only took me a second to make the decision and that's..."

"Scary?"

"Yeah that's so scary now that I'm thinking about it." My voice broke as I tried to hold back tears. "I-I'm sorry."

"Shh. I already told you, no apologies-"

"But I-"

"No baby. No apologies." She squeezed my hand before bringing it to her lips for a soft kiss. "It's ok."

"I didn't want to hurt you." She frowned but nodded.

"I'm glad you woke up. You have no idea how happy I am right now."

"You're happy?"

"Of course I'm happy. You survived. I've never been happier than this, I thought I was going to lose you and I didn't." She held my hand tighter. "I didn't lose you." Her voice cracked. "I don't know what I would've done if I had lost you." A few more tears rolled down her cheeks and I wiped them away this time. "I love you so much, I just want you to be alright. I'm willing to do anything to make that the case, ok?" I nodded and bit my lip to keep myself from sobbing. "I love you so much. Please don't leave me."

"I won't." I sniffled. "I'm so sorry, I won't."

"I'm so glad to have you back."

"I love you JJ. I love you."

"I love you too."

[the-radio-demon-blog]

Alastor, I’m giving you an explanation, but fair warning, you might be a little unnerved after reading this.

Well, you have what we youngsters call ‘simps.’

I hate to be the person explaining this to you, but it was gonna happen eventually.

You see, a ‘simp’ is a person who loves another person. But like on an almost excessive amount. There are different levels of ‘simpery’.

Level one: staring, basically just being hopelessly in love. (Example: Jake couldn’t tear his eyes away from Alice. She was so beautiful, he didn’t know how she woke up like this. Perfect hair, perfect smile, perfect…well, everything.)

Level two: I’m going to use you for this level. You see, when you simp for someone, you probably want to pat their head or brush your hand through their hair.

In your case, your simps want to touch your ears and know if you have a tail (let’s say you do for this explanation) The ears are pretty explanatory, they look fluffy, obviously you want to pet them unless you’re weird.

The tail thing…well it’s difficult to explain…basically, people write and draw…uhm…*couch* suggestive *cough cough* things about your tail. However, it isn’t always sexual. Some people use it for art practice or writing practice or just draw and write about it for fun! It’s like your ears, people think that it looks fluffy and want to pet it.

Level Three: *winces*…dirty thoughts…I’m not going to delve deep into this one, I know you don’t like it…but…people buy…body pillows with your picture on it…they imagine…doing you know what (*cough cough* sex *cough*) with you…and…other…ahem…suggestive things…heh…

Level Four: Obsession. This level is the most dangerous. Not only is the person experiencing all the previous levels, but they also cannot get enough of you. They want to do everything for you. They want to do anything for you, anything and everything. They want to be near you all the time. Basically a typical obsession.

So..yeah…that’s why you have so many people offering their souls to you for such little prices (hugs, ear pets, cuddles). They simp for you, on these different levels of simpery.

So there. And explanation as to why people want to pet your ears, cuddle with you, hug you…other things.

Sincerely,

A fan that regrets explaining this, but did it because it was necessary to have you maybe understand.

Simps?

Well, Level One appears to be endearing so far.

Ah, so is that why so many people have been obsessing over my ears? Well, I suppose that is slightly understandable.

Suggestive things about my tail? Why in God's name would they want to do that???

Alastor's eye twitches. People buy body pillows of me??? Dear God, almighty. Eugh. No, no, no.

Level Four actually appears to be somewhat useful. As long as it's not a Vox level obsession. Obsession is a resourceful tool when it is used correctly.

Hah! Simpery! What an interesting term! Well, I suppose its working out for me so far! I just...sincerely hope none of them are on Level Three. Alastor cringes with disgust. What a carnal thing to do!

I do appreciate the explanation, my dear fan. It was quite helpful. You know, Niffty loves to coin that term for me...wait.

Niffty calls me a simp? A simp? Ugh. I'm going to have to speak to her about this. I should've seeked out an explanation sooner.

[andreal831]

So, I'm just gonna come out and say it: Despite probably only being planned in S4 - the idea of the Hollow and it's very elusive presence being the mastermind behind the Originals and it's history is actually engenious!

(Keep in mind, I'm talking as if I'm inside the universe - not as a viewer looking in. Also, fair warning, I alternate between "The Hollow" and Inadu since they are the same person.)

Let's start with the fact that thanks to Inadu, we know werewolves are just cursed witches cut off from their magic with interesting loopholes (such as the Unification Ceremony) - everyone from TVD should've called it because it's ALWAYS a witch creating a new supernatural species! The even bigger factors come from: why killing triggers the werewolf curse (Inadu was murdered - by her mother), the history that combined werewolf abilities were once divided and needed a witch-like ceremony to come together, the story of how Inadu's bones were kept/used until she got her body back, and the very idea that - unlike vampires - werewolves are a bloodline curse allowed to reproduce. If I'm not being clear, the story of the Hollow correlates a lot with werewolf lore. My only headcanons are that werewolf venom became a thing as a result of vampires being created - a natural defense with a supernatural twist - and wolfsbane is a weakness because she died in a field of wolfsbane. With the fact that werewolves existed 500 years prior, that's half a millennia of history that's got lost, destroyed, or spread out in time (since you don't watch Legacies: Long story short, a Shunka Warakin - a creature Ioway Native American mythos that hunts werewolves - made an appearance. Liberties aside, that essentially says werewolves had a rival predator/there were so many werewolves that a creature like this came into existence), and that's not forgetting how much that loss was furthered by Klaus & Elijah engineering The Sune & Moon Curse to lift his own - imagine how many werewolves died listening to following that crap. So, thanks to The Hollow, we have an entire lost-to-be-rediscovered lore for werewolves. Who knows, maybe the Fated Mates in typical werewolf novels might have some truth in them as well😁.

Next, New Orleans. The very idea that The Hollow is a corrupted, evil soul capable of dark and impossible feats says so much. For starters, her very presence and influence can turn good people into evil-doing followers. If I had to go back, let's start with Xavier Dumas (Jackson's grandfather and the guy who murdered Elias and Brooke Labonair - my HC names for Hayley's parents if you don't mind). It was bad enough he was already upset with Elias for trying to make peace with Marcel, once the Hollow sunk her hooks into him, she used him to get access to one of her remaining remains and when he was of no use, he was left to accept his crimes as a disgraced wolf. Next, we see Vincent and his then not-evil-wife Eva dealing with Marcel's hold on the witches. When Vincent started practicing its magic with Eva - who took it a step further, Inadu started to influence them and their bodies. But for whatever reason, Vincent stopped practicing but Eva was already in her grasp. Now fast forward. I'm sorry, but did no one ask why a twenty-something witch was able to overcome an Original's possession over her body? Not even Alaric and Tyler were able to do it when Klaus possessed them. Like, that's badass as hell, but now that we know about Inadu and her thing for sacrificing witch children, it's very likely now we witnessed the first acolyte of the Hollow's cult through Eva and we just didn't know it - and considering she'd already had killed witches for her, the juice she got for empowering Inadu came into play in the form of gaining her body back from Rebekah. (I also have a theory Finn was corrupted by Inadu's leftover essence on Vincent - explaining his different behavior as Finncent vs in his own body, but nobody's ready for that talk😝). Now, let's move to the last group, the Ancestors. The very fact she was impressed by them and how it connects to the Harvest is interesting if you wanted to say the Harvest was created to give power to the Ancestral Well and keep The Hollow imprisoned. The killing of young witches, the passing on power to super-witch that Davina went through in S1, coming back not quite right but more to the Ancestors' cause? The very fact of all that the Ancestors knew about Inadu's origin story says they knew what she was and was capable of since the beginning and when the connection was destroyed in S3, in all good intentions, Vincent let a very bad cat out of the bag for Davina.

Lastly were Inadu's abilities. Compared to many others in the TVD Universe, not only was she a master at possession, she was able to practice magic in a vampire's body - which no one has done before, bring somebody back to life after having their heart ripped out, alter her blood to be toxic to a vampire, telepathic moral corruption, create corporal illusions capable of physical attacks, crushing hearts from the inside... honestly, The Hollow was a full package of feats that shouldn't go underutilized. I even say she didn't even need to feel scared when she had her original physical body back because she already had a plan and Hope - being her blood and easily located, helped by the fact she fears her - only says she knew things would work out. My only regret is that if done right, Inadu would have followed Hope into Legacies because she'd be the Boogeyman only she can face.

Most people hate Inadu for writing reasons and some hate her for being the reason the Mikaelsons were divided. But in the case of the latter, isnt that what made her a successful villain? A villain's job is to stop the heroes or antiheroes (the Mikaelsons) from getting what they want. The Hollow was a villain so powerful, so menacing, manipulating from the background while the living were clueless in their own troubles that inadvertently added in bringing her to power so she could be an active threat. TO was all about being a family and sticking together and she gave them no choice but to separate if they didn't want Hope possessed again. So technically, in life and in death, the Hollow is a successful villain as she kept the Mikaelsons apart and got to Hope in the end. Essentially an inevitable that did what no one else could do.

I am obsessed with how thorough this is.

I'll be honest that I don't spend a lot of time thinking about Inadu/The Hollow, simply because Season 4 and 5 are not my favorite seasons. But, not because I didn't like her story or the lore, simply because the writing starts to go off the rails and becomes very rushed.

But I agree, Inadu was one of the best villains in TO. And it's completely because, as you pointed out, she did what every other villain was attempting to do. She felt not remorse for it either. Don't get me wrong, I love most of the villains in TO, but the show, for the most part, would always back pedal at the end and make them "redeemable" villains. Which is why I liked Lucien, even in his last breath he did not try to be a better person. He was a villain through and through. Inadu took it even further because they don't offer any justification for her behavior. Yes, her family killed her, but because she was power hungry and murderous. She was essentially the Kai Parker of TO. And you're exactly right, people only don't like her because she was successful. They only like the villains when the villains are bad at it. Inadu had the entire city, including the Mikaelsons, running scared.

I loved that we finally got lore into the werewolves, they were such an underutilized species throughout TVDU. I'll have to actually watch Legacies if it goes into it more. I love your headcannons of how the werewolves evolved and played out. I would also add that Inadu likely added the "werewolf rage" to make them just like her. She was punished for her murderous mentality, so she wanted her family to feel how she felt, to behave as she had.

I only wish that we could have had a full season with Inadu. There was still so much to explore and a lot unanswered. She was incredibly powerful and I love that they never really defeat her. I agree, she should have gone on to Legacies. I hated at the end, Elijah and Klaus die to "kill" Inadu, but they had tried that before. I'm forgetting who it was, but Inadu was possessing someone and they killed that person and Inadu just went back to the ancestry plane and then possessed someone else. You may remember more and maybe I'm forgetting exactly why it worked, but to me, it was too easy.

I would have also loved to see the werewolves more invovled in the Inadu plot line, since it was their ancestor. But we only ever see Hayley. The werewolves completely disappeared after season 3.

I love this breakdown so much and I'm definitely holding onto it for future stories!

[fantasy-on-parchment]

Make It Up to You (Pt. 2)

Evangeline x Jacks

FAIR WARNING this fic was started before the release of ballad, so it does not line up with the plot!! But also, no spoilers that I know of...

Warning: angst, smut, happy ending duh

Summary: After the miscommunication at her childhood home, Evangeline does her best to steer clear of Jacks. However, the fate has much different ideas in mind.

unedited bc id rather write more than go back an edit, sue me <3

Love ya's!!

She would not cry again. She would not cry again. She...

Evangeline repeated the mantra in her head over and over as she finally approached her room. Sliding open the wooden door, she quickly slammed it shut behind her and pushed to lock. She wouldn't allow herself to be alone for long, fates knew Wolf Hall would need her attention as soon as possible. Which, for once, was most likely a good thing. If she sat alone in her room for too long, she'd begin thinking too hard about everything that was said.

"--he probably didn't love you in the first place!"

With a groan, Evangeline twisted to pull the cape off her back. She threw all thoughts of the prince of hearts out the window. She didn't need to think about him. Him and his blue eyes, his crooked smirk, his veined hands... they wouldn't get her anywhere.

She threw the cape into her wardrobe and the satchel on the bed before proceeding into the ensuite bathroom to wash the tear tracks on her cheeks and apply enough blush that the splotchy color of her face would look purposeful.

Princesses weren't supposed to cry. Not over their exes, and certainly not over unattainable god-like creatures such as Jacks. So, she finished in the bathroom, changed into a silky, golden evening gown that stopped just above the floor, and exited her chambers.

He hadn't followed her, which was honestly surprising. She expected him to have more to say, to mock her tears maybe. But when she got to the castle stairs after the return, she turned to see he had not yet followed her. And he wasn't waiting at her door now either.

Good. She forced herself to think, good.

"Princess Evangeline!"

"Your highness!"

"Mi'lady!"

Suddenly she was swarmed by nobles, postmen, and even servants. In the middle of the decent sized crowd, she couldn't make out the faces pushing to get towards her. Different letters and offers were pushed into her hands as she was also pushed around the circle. She huffed at the annoyance of it all, she had only been gone a little over 6 hours and this is what she returned to?

"Excuse me?!"

She pushed her way out of the swarm of voices and brushed herself off when they all turned to her with alarmed expressions.

She went to speak again when a different voice entered the mix.

"Now that is no way to greet our future queen, is it?" The drawl came from beside her, and she turned to see blue eyes and that insufferable smirk.

As if she thought she could catch a break today.

The corridor was quiet for a moment as the crowd looked between each other and them, and then, as if nothing had happened, they charged forward once again with their questions and letters.

Evangeline felt Jacks shift to grab her, and as her breath caught in her throat, she did the only thing she thought to do at the moment.

She dived straight into the bustling crowd. Ducking down, she gathered her skirt to herself and moved quickly around the bodies who still moved in the opposite direction as if not noticing her escape attempt.

"Little Fox!" The bustling of the crowd did nothing to drown out his heavy footsteps, they were all she heard as she bolted down the corridor.

Should've stayed in her rooms, no one had to know she was back in the castle yet. But it was almost dinner, and the nobles were used to her dining with them. In the Prince's absence, going over events and decision-making this way comforted the civilians.

"Little Fox, stop this instant!"

She took a sharp turn, and pulled herself into an alcove where he wouldn't find her. The alcoves of the castle were covered by curtains, and she pulled that across the opening and waited for his footsteps to pass.

She took deep breaths and waited a minute, soothing out her bodice and fluffing her skirts. She couldn't hear him anymore, and pray tell he couldn't make out her labored breaths.

She stepped out of the alcove, quickly going back in the direction she came.

Or she would, if it weren't for a hand pulling her back.

tsk, tsk, Little Fox

Once she processed being back behind the curtain, she quickly wrenched her arm out of grasp and turned towards Jacks.

"How did you see me?" She demanded.

His smirk was all wolf, and she hated it. Damn it, she hated every bit of it.

"You're easy to find, when you want to be."

"But I do not want to be! So kindly leave!" She gave all the authority she could to her voice, but the look on his face didn't even falter.

But then he was pushing her against the dark wall of the alcove, absolutely out of to any passerbyers. He leaned down to her ear to whisper, "Oh I beg to differ, love."

"You don't know anything." She countered, but it was meek while she was pressed to his chest, surrounded by the scent of apples and pine.

He hummed against her throat, his breath traveling down her neck and ghosting over her breasts. It took everything in her not to gasp.

"Well, I think I know one thing..."

"And what is that?"

"I owe you an apology."

Oh.

Oh...

Evangeline certainly hadn't expected that. If anything, she expected him to snark at her again. But not want to... apologize?

"Jacks...?" She softly laid her hands on his shoulders and pushed back until he met her eyes. They still held the heat that she imagined hers did, but behind it was something melancholy, almost regretful.

He seemed to breathe deeply before saying, "I am sorry, Evangeline."

"Oh..."

"I do not always think about how my tone might be taken, as I'm sure you know. And... as we've established in the past, I am a jealous fate, a possessive fate at times... and when I saw you upset over him I just-" He cut himself off.

The alcove was quiet as she watched him, not wanting to interrupt what was obviously a difficult situation for him.

"-I meant what I said, Eva-"

"I-" She started.

"No. Don't get angry with me yet." He stepped closer again, allowing their chests to press flush together and her back to press against the wall. "While I'm sure Luc loved you in the way he knew how, he did not know how to love you in the way you deserve. And you do deserve love, Little Fox."

Evangeline knew she was naive at times, but she simply couldn't help the way her heart swelled at his validation.

But she squared her shoulders anyways, "That does not permit the way you spoke to me."

"I know, I do. I am sorry for not seeing past my own desires."

Her brow furrowed as she looked up to him, her nose close enough to brush his. "Your... desires?"

His smirk returned at that; she had obviously zeroed in on the part of his sentence that he hoped she would. His hands lifted to her waist, pushing her back further to the wall as he leaned back and roved his eyes over her. This apology was getting more and more confusing.

His eyes returned to hers, the heat back in place as he studied her. She felt herself blush, red covering her cheeks down to the tops of her breasts. He leaned back down to her ear.

"Do you want me to leave, Little Fox?"

She tried to inhale, but the air was thick, and her lungs simply would not take much air. "I... I need to go to dinner."

He laughed lowly, "That's not what I asked, so answer my question please?" He leaned closer, his lips down her neck to her collarbone.

She held back a gasp, trying to compose herself before her mouth spoke for her: "No."

"No?"

"Please, no."

Another chuckle, "Good... because just because I apologize, Little Fox, doesn't mean I'm done with you."

He leaned back, stepping away until her entire being craved his touch. He looked over her.

"Where did he touch you?"

"What?" She was breathless already, oh my it was embarrassing.

His smile was viscous because he knew, "Tell me, Evangeline Fox, where did your little vampire boy touch you?"

She actually almost laughed at his possessiveness, "Jacks--"

But he stepped closer, grabbing her hand. "Here?" He placed his lips against her hand in the whisper of a kiss. It was sweet, almost loving.

But then his lips were under her ear, "Here?" He licked, and nipped slightly as he worked his way across her neck until she moaned out.

He chuckled, "Did he ever find the spot that makes you sing, hmm? Right here?" He bit down again.

She went to say no, but it came out in a whimper as she pushed against him.

He pulled back again, his thumb brushing her lip. "Obviously here... but we know I can't kiss you-"

"Bite me." She jumped, too quick to give him the opportunity.

But he leaned forward, "So eager," he praised before his teeth sank against her bottom lip. He whimpered again, moaning his name as he pulled away.

"So tell me, where else?" He held his hand out, giving her the control to show him.

With a shuddered breath, she took his hand, moving it over her neck again and letting him give a gentle squeeze before she gathered her courage and moved his hand down to the tops of her breasts. She watched his face as she did, watching as his eyes battled between rage and lust. She was grateful for her skirts, for once, for the way he couldn't see her rub her thighs together. She usually hated his anger, but the rage he had at the thought of another man touching her... suddenly her panties felt tight and... wet.

"... Just the top?" He asked through his teeth. She bit her lip, only knowing how to shake her head.

Jacks growled, gripping her waist and turning her roughly so he could shove her against the wall. She almost shrieked before she felt his hands at the small of her back, he was careful to not tear the lace, but he roughly pulled the laces apart until the bodice hung loose at her waist before turning her back around.

Eva pulled at the sleeves as Jacks stepped back and watched the dress fall to the floor of the alcove until she stood in her slip and flats.

"What if we're caught?"

He didn't stop looking at how the slip hugged her curves to say: "I can control what people do, love, don't worry about it." And then he was stepping forward to grip the hem of her slip.

"But-" She didn't have time before the slip was pulled over her head and his hands landed on her chest.

He cursed as he leaned down to nip across the swell of her breasts. Her head fell back against the wall, but she hated not doing anything. So she reached forward and began unbuttoning his shirt. When she began to struggle, she got frustrated and ripped the buttons apart until his was standing shirtless. She moaned again as her hands landed on his hot skin, just has his lips closed over her breast.

Evangeline gasped, "He-he never..."

"Of course, he wasn't creative enough." Jacks grunted.

Before she could say anything else, his hand slid down her stomach to her panties. He wasted no time running his fingers over the fabric, "Here?"

No, she'd never been touched there. She'd heard from fellow girls that certain feelings derive from that area, but she had never been courageous enough to explore.

"No... no one." She whispered.

He smiled against her stomach as he knelt onto his knees. "Good, I'd have to kill anyone who had."

The words alone felt like she might shatter. It was a feeling she didn't understand. His fingers skimmed her skin up to her hips, lightly gripping the sides of her panties as he looked up to her. She'd never get over it, the way he looked on his knees. His hair was disheveled from where she had gripped it as he sucked on her skin. The look in his eyes neared on begging as he asked, "Do you trust me to show you?"

She didn't know, but she couldn't help but nod, "Please, Jacks."

That was all he needed before his grip tightened and her panties her ripped from her skin. She squealed as he dropped them.

"I need those!"

He chuckled, "No, Eva, I promise you do not." But then his eyes moved to between her thighs, and the groan he let out was so tortured that the knot inside her stomach strung tight. "I always knew you'd have a pretty cunt, Little Fox."

With his words, he lifted a finger until it reached her center, running through her folds and picking up something slick.

"And oh, my fates," his forehead landed to rest on her naval, "You're so wet for me, aren't you, pretty girl?"

"Yes..." She breathed out, still unsure.

He looked up at her, but only as his thumb pressed hard against the nerves between her thighs. He watched as her jaw dropped, and her eyes widened with surprise. Oh, my fates indeed. Jacks continued to push that thumb in lazy circles over that spot as her hips shuttered.

She thought she'd felt it all, but that was before his thumb pulled away and was replaced by his ring finger nudging against her opening. It pushed forward with equal sting and equal pleasure. Eva's head fell back before Jacks demanded: "Look at me."

She obeyed, suddenly willing to do anything he asks. "Good girl, good little fox." He praised as he brought that finger in and out, over and over. "I've just got to taste you, you know that?"

"W-what?" wouldn't it taste... awful?

He returned his attention down, smirking despite her question as he used her other hand to push her legs further apart. As he leaned forward, her hand shot out to grip his hair and stop him.

Before she could blink, her hand was pulled away and pinned to the wall as her side. His eyes held heat as he looked up from her, "Do not stop me from pleasuring you, Evangeline. Do not stop me from erasing the very memory of that boy."

She paused, thinking, before relaxing and shifting her legs open wider. As unsure as she was, she also found herself liking the idea of submitting to what he wanted to do to her.

Happy now, Jacks let go of her hand to steady himself as he leaned forward. Before she knew it, he what nudging her center, and suddenly his tongue was in the spot his thumb had been and-- oh.

"Oh, Jacks, please!" Her hands returned to his hair, but only to push him closer. Her hips rolled in a way she'd never felt as his tongue flicked and his teeth grazed while his finger found that spot.

She felt him hum against her, "Such a perfect cunt, princess. You're going to fall apart for me, okay? Fall apart on my face." He practically moaned the words, but they still held all the authority.

And she couldn't take it, one more lick and suddenly she was shattering against him and he was gripping her, his tongue taking everything she had. He didn't stop until the shaking became light tremors, and he went to stand up.

She felt awkward suddenly, "Um, well..."

"Oh we're not done." He scoffed, hands finding his pants as he cornered her again.

"We're... we're not?"

"Not unless you want to be." He shook his head, undoing the buttons of his trousers as she watched. She knew the male anatomy, knew that size and width always differed like height. But she still wasn't prepared for the outline indenting his pants. Still, she reached out simply because she needed to do something.

Grabbing the top of his pants and underwear, she took a deep breath and shoved until they fell below his knees, and he stepped out of them and his boots. There they stood, nothing on. She tried not to look but she couldn't help it. If he'd touched her down there, maybe she could...

She reached out before he knew, her hand wrapping around what she could fit and naturally pumping up and down. It was the first time she'd heard Jacks gasp, and he caught himself with his arms on either side of her head.

"My fates, Little Fox, that feels so good." She smiled at the praise, liking that she was doing something right.

"Can I... also use my tongue?" She was curious.

He let out a breathless moan, "Yes, yes you can. But... not tonight. Tonight, you're mine."

She didn't know what he meant as she dropped her hand just for him to seize both of her wrists in one of his hands. He positioned them above her head and left them there so he could grip her waist. She loved his touch, so demanding, so adamant.

He lifted her against the wall, "Wrap your legs around my waist, princess."

She did as told, and watched as one hand returned to her wrists, and another grabbed his dick. She was entranced as he rubbed the head of it against those nerves once again. And suddenly she was back to square one, writhing and rolling her hips.

"Good... good little fox." He cooed. And then he pushed lower, to that same hole his finger had been.

"No.'' He paused immediately, "How... how will you fit?"

He leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers, not a kiss, but brushed. "I've got you ready, my love, let me take care of you."

He waited for further protest before pushing forward. It stung, but less than she thought it might. More so, she felt full. She felt him stretching her as he groaned against her neck. She watched where they connected, as he only went in a little, before pulling back and pushing in further and further. Her eyes brimmed with tears, but her mouth opened in a moan.

"Please, please, more." She cried.

She felt him tense, before he pulled out and suddenly slammed into the hilt. She screamed, praying no one was near.

"Oh my, Jacks, please."

"You like that?" She asked against her ear, "You're taking all of me so well, Eva, and you like it? You hated me mere hours ago but look at you so obediently obeying me."

"Yes, yes, please." In and out, in and out, she couldn't stop watching. She'd never felt this way before, never felt so safe and so on edge.

"Let go with me, c'mon baby." He pushed harder, faster. Over and over until they both shuttered and fell apart together. She wanted to kiss him, and the way his forehead landed on hers when he let go told her how badly he longed too as well.

"Oh my fates," She breathed as he let her legs fall to the floor. Jacks chuckled before picking up her slip.

"We're doing to get you dressed, then you're coming back to my rooms to clean up, okay?"

She simply nodded, too dazed, too in love.

[newwwwusername]

Can you do a platonic Autistic!Vaggie and Angel fic?

Vaggie has an overstimulated meltdown due to having to deal with everyone's antics and surprisingly Angel comforts her

Do not repost this on other sites. It will be cross-posted to AO3 under the same username.

Content warning for self-injurious stimming and depictions of an Autistic meltdown

Normally, Vaggie was good at ignoring the chaos of the hotel and all of the constant talking and whining and bitching from what few residents lived there.

Vaggie generally didn't get too overstimulated at the Hotel. She'd fought on the front lines before, back when she was an Exorcist, so she knew how to endure the noise well enough. The lights were generally kept pretty dim for her sake, by Charlie's insistence. Alastor had suggested a few times that they made the place brighter but one look at Vaggie was all Charlie needed to shut that idea down.

However, at this particular moment, her brain wasn't handling everything as well as it should've.

Sir Pentious and Alastor had gotten into a petty, loud argument about the semantics of... Something, and the noise was only made worse by the occasional two cents from the Egg Bois, who couldn't seem to decide which side they were on.

Over by the bar, Charlie was enthusiastically going through a list of ideas of how to make that part of the Hotel more friendly, much to Husk's annoyance. Angel sat by, occasionally throwing in a vulgar comment.

And Niffty was... Well, being Niffty and loudly tormenting a few roaches who had found their way into the main area of the hotel.

Vaggie stood by the staircase, trying her best to keep herself calm and collected even as all the noise grew louder. It was a losing battle, though, especially as her brain began to focus in on the sound of the lights and the AC as well. It was Angel who saw her race upstairs, so he casually walked away from the bar- Charlie and Husk were too deep into discussion to even notice him leaving.

Upon going upstairs, Angel quickly made his way to Vaggie's quarters. He opened the door (which she hadn't locked in her overwhelm) and immediately spotted her sitting up in the bed, curled in a ball, and hitting herself in the head repeatedly.

He quickly but calmly got up onto the bed. He didn't want to touch her when she was clearly overwhelmed so he instead picked up one of the pillows on the bed and gently put it in between her hand and the hand she was hitting herself with, just to minimize injury.

He got up again and walked over to where the light slider was on the wall and dimmed the lights in the room. Her hitting died down a bit with that and he could now more clearly hear the low whine repeatedly emanating from her vocal chords.

"Vaggie?" he said in an uncharacteristically soft voice as he once again sat down on the bed in front of her. She didn't give any sort of response- Verbal or otherwise- So he figured that this probably wasn't a talk-through-it type of meltdown. Realistically, all he could really do now was keep her company until she calmed down.

Eventually, she tired herself out enough for the meltdown to end and she just sat there, avoiding Angel's gaze. She was embarrassed- This was embarrassing. She felt embarrassed when it was Charlie seeing her like that- But Angel Dust?

She was about ready to curl up and die.

"Ya okay?" Angel asked. She shrugged. "Can't talk?" She nodded timidly. "'Kay, hold on a sec" he told her, pulling out his phone and opening the notes app. He handed her the device with a weak smile. "There ya go"

'Sorry about that' she typed out. He frowned.

"Ya don't gotta apologize fo' that" he told her earnestly. "I know we ain't all tha' close, but I ain't gonna judge ya fo' somethin' like this. Ya can't help it"

'Thank you for the pillow and the lights and for not leaving me alone'

"I figured no one else was gonna cause they were all distracted" he told her honestly. She supposed that was fair- I think they both would've preferred if it was Charlie there with her instead of him, but it also could've been worse. "D'ya wanna be left alone?"

'No, it's okay. You can stay if you want'

"Alrigh' then" Angel leaned back on the bed and stared at the ceiling while Vaggie recovered from her meltdown. He wondered if he could call her a friend rather than an acquaintance.

Vaggie figured that they were probably friends.

[sweetinsaniiity]

HI FRIEND!!

just wanna say i've revisited and reread hail to the king like 5 or 6 (honestly probably more) times since it's been released 😭 it's probably one of the best yunho fics i've read, i'm so invested in it on a level beyond the smut you really captured the yearning and desperation that i've been wanting to see in fics for AWHILE now 🩷

that being said i doooo have a few questions that may be kinda silly 🤠 perhaps i didn't read as closely i may have missed it

with how highly valued kisses are in aurora + the kiss scene w wooyoung, i kind of interpreted it as yn being a virgin/inexperienced?? & my brain started going in hyperdrive wondering if she IS one because if she was, she certainly wasn't during the seven year time skip when her & yunho finally sleep together, & if she lost it to someone who wasn't yunho.. how would he react to that?? 💀

in general i've been thinking about the main couples time apart & i can't help but wonder how much yunho was thinking about yn. if she was falling in love w someone else or if he was going so crazy he contemplated taking her again 😭😭 you really cooked with these characters im so hyperfixated

sorry to flood your ask with so much yapping but i haven't been this obsessed with a work in awhile, you're an excellent writer 🫶🏼🫶🏼

HELLO! ❤️ You're going to make me cry if you keep saying this 😭 I've been really nervous about the fic because this took me a long time to write and it is quite long, but I'm happy that you like it! It inspires me to write more because I was actually feeling down about it lately 😭

And no, questions are never silly!

I didn't need to elaborate it because it was long, but maybe I should have, but Y/N has been rebelling against her father for a while and kissing definitely was easier to give out to rebel. The reason why it hurt her with Yunho/Wooyoung was because of the lack of consent. Omg this is a very valid thing I should've put this!!! But if Yunho found out, Yunho would have burned the whole kingdom just to eliminate that guy, and then just do it the second time just to make sure he's dead.

Having said that, if you want virgin, I have a San one, it's called 'My Heart, I Surrender'. Fair warning though - it has non-consent elements.

THANK YOU 😭😭😭 I'm glad that I was able to clearly interpret that characters like I wanted! And Yunho definitely wanted to; he just didn't want to mess her up again ;) Flood my ask all you want, I don't care, I love answering! Thank you very, very much, kind stranger ❤️❤️

[manyothermusingsofmine]

Brotherly Advice || Drabble

Fandom: Xmen

Warnings: Characters talking about informed consent and societal expectations around it

Wordcount: 3003

Summary: Miranda has a lot of concerns and needs to address them to someone who hopefully isn't flying as blind as she is anymore- so Gambit really is her only option. If I hand you the means to hurt me, do you promise that you won't? AN: found family siblings have a serious chat. two emotionally wounded and fifteen dead from the collateral damage (not really)(I'M JOKING) ---------------------

She was supposed to be cleaning out her room. Miranda knew herself well enough to know that when stuff started piling up her mood got worse because of it, and she was trying to talk herself through the complicated task of getting rid of jewelry she no longer wore. It was harder than just vacuuming or tasks like that, because she very much attributed certain memories to certain pieces of her jewelry collection.

Yet she now held a pair of earrings in her hand, silently running her thumb over the stones as she remembered when she last wore them; at the masquerade ball. Since then they hadn't seen the light of day again, hadn't been worn by her even for a moment.

Because every time she even wanted to reach for them, a sting of pain pulled through her; the pain of the memory of arguing with Remy. Yes, they both apologized for their behavior, so why couldn't she shake the feeling that the things she said had hurt him far more than he let on?

He wasn't bringing it up. Should she?

She had been so mean to him, implying all kinds of stuff giving away how much she didn't seem to trust him, but that had long since shifted. Yes, she had apologized- even back then she had realised that she was taking out her own issues on him like that was in any way fair to pull.

Had she ever really truly asked for his advice and help afterwards? He had helped her, there was no doubt about that. On multiple occasions he had either kept her from completely falling apart or completely fucking up her own relationship, course correcting like a copilot stopped the pilot from crashing the entire plane into the mountainside.

But at some point she really had to bite the bullet and just talk to him about something that had been bothering her for the past several weeks now, something crawling in her mind that she needed his advice on. Only his would do, because the other people who actually had any experience with this were people she felt far too intimidated by to approach. Not with this.

It had to be Gambit. For whatever her trust was worth, she just had to put it in him and hope he wasn't going to use it against her. Miranda sighed, dropping the earrings back in her jewelry box and quickly tapping her chest in the four points of a cross. If she was going to rip this damn band aid off then delaying it was only going to make it so much worse.

How the fuck was it this difficult to find a 6'2 Cajun with theoretically no mutant hiding power in the mansion?

Miranda wandered around the hallways again until she finally heard the familiar tones of his accent as he- tried to sweet talk Shadow in the doorframe of the latter's office. Yeah, okay, Miranda probably should've seen that coming. It took everything in her will power to not massively roll her eyes at the flirty lines Gambit was throwing Shadow's way. God, how did those work on anyone?

'Like you're one to judge,' a voice in the back of her head sneered, 'you seem to be the only one it doesn't work on. Maybe you're the weird one in this set up, not him.'

She lightly shook her head, waiting until she heard the door close and slowly peeking around the corner. For whatever reason, Gambit wasn't immediately walking off, leaning against the wall near the door instead to take his cards and shuffle them around. This was her chance, her chance to... how exactly was she gonna ask any of this? She bit her lower lip in worry, just watching him for a second before deeply breathing in and out.

She went up to him feigning her casual demeanor, until she was next to him mirroring his leaning against the wall. She debated with herself once more whether she should do this or not, her brain screaming at her to please not hand him something akin to a loaded gun that he could use against her- but the growing worry in the back of her skull needed the opinion of someone with some damn expertise.

She lightly tapped his upper arm once, then twice when he didn't react the first time around. He only noticed at the second tap, ever so slightly flinching when he realised she was this close next to him. He hadn't even heard her coming up to him.

"... Can I help you?"

“Can we… Can we talk? I… You’re not in trouble, I just... I need your opinion on something.”

Gambit just looked at her, his expression somewhere between stunned and confused. His opinion on something? Miranda didn’t ask him for his opinion on things, or, well, not directly like she did right now. His brain needed a moment just to reboot and formulate a response to this.

“O… kay? Talking right now though, ain’t we?”

“Yeah, well, not here,” Miranda huffed, though she didn’t sound irritated, more worried, “these halls have eyes and ears everywhere, and that’s decisively not where I want to have a private conversation with a friend. Just… meet me at the south of the mansion near the forest line, no one really bothers to go there. In like, ten minutes?” “… Sure?”

As soon as he agreed to this meet up she vanished and presumably left, with Gambit’s confusion just growing. A private conversation about something she wanted his opinion on; that sure sounded like he was in trouble, even if she said that wasn’t the case. He let out a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. Oh, Gods above, what was he getting himself into now?

True to his word though; he showed up at the back end of the mansion where Miranda stood with her back against the wall. She was staring into the forest line with a million mile glare, with Gambit just calmly approaching her and mirroring her leaning against the wall. It was surprising how nobody noticed him moving around the place considering his statue, but he was a thief in his heyday- so maybe not so surprising after all.

“I’m here,” he said gently, though she flinched a little as he pulled her out of her thoughts, “whatcha need my opinion on?”

Her eyes observed him from the very corners for a second, before her gaze started nervously flitting all over the place. She looked at the ground, the sky, the forest line, him again and only then settled on the forest line as she crossed her arms over her chest in thought.

“How… How do I know I’m not boring him?”

His gaze had followed hers to the forest line, almost as if he was curious to see if she genuinely saw something. But at her question his eyebrows just knitted themselves into a furrow, as the red ruby eyes he possessed slightly tilted towards her. Honestly, he genuinely had no idea what she was talking about- what that was even supposed to mean. “… You’re going to have to elaborate on that one, Fifolet.”

She let out a deep sigh that didn’t seem to relief anything, pushing her head back against the bricks of the building a little so staring up into the sky was a little easier. She flickered, vanished from sight and in barely a moment later everything came pouring out; “How do I know I’m not boring Kurt, that I’m not boring to him- Am I even doing any of this right?! Like, god damn it, every serious piece of media or book I have read on the subject is constantly hammering it in how he needs to tend to my inexperience, that he needs to be this paragon of taking my explicit and enthusiastic and informed consent into the highest consideration, and he does, that’s not the problem, but like, what the hell do I do back for him?! Yes, the technical stuff I know, I know what goes were, the technicalities behind protection and to, duh, use it. But other than that?! I don’t know! It’s never brought up how I’m supposed to navigate his inexperience, how I’m supposed to navigate all of this with someone who if I tell him to jump he asks how high and then just- What do I do?! Do I just pray to the heavens above that if I ask him something he says yes because he wants to and not only and solely because I asked?!”

Gambit just stared at the forest line, desperately trying to piece together just what the hell she was going on about while praying she would stop to breathe at some point- it felt like she was venting about a question she had already asked while actually neglecting to ask it in the first place. Or at least, ask about it in a very round about way. He took a breath, slowly exhaling and giving it another thought. Protection. Inexperience. Consent.

Oh. “Whoof,” he huffed out for a moment as it cleared his head further, “alright, let me see if I actually properly followed along here. You’re saying the two of you have been… getting up to stuff, shall we say? And you’re worried about..?”

“… The focus being only on me,” she said a lot more quietly, a tremble to her voice, “The focus seems to be only on me, from what I’ve read anyway. Make sure she’s comfortable and consents to your ideas, yada yada, great. I’m comfortable, he makes sure of that, now what? He’s respectful about my boundaries on things I don’t want to try, or don’t want to try yet, because they scare me in one way or another, fantastic, now what? How do I know I’m not robbing him from some experience he would like to have because my dumb fears get in the way of it, how do I know I’m not boring him out of his mind by just.. being this completely inexperienced woman he has to deal with? I… I guess there’s only so much books and media can teach me, I need the advice of someone who actually has some practical experience, who knows what the fuck they’re doing; I’m just making this up as I go wishing with all my heart that I don’t do serious damage to my relationship along the way.”

Gambit just listened, thinking, getting a clearer image in his head of her actual concern here; one that was both heartwarming in what it was rooted in, and worrisome in how she decided to word it. Kind of like someone else he knew who had a worrisome way of thinking about all of this.

“You’re afraid you’re not “holding up your end of the bargain”, huh?”

Miranda reappeared, her arms much more tightly around herself in a hug, her cheeks burning a bright color of red as this was a topic she genuinely did not like talking about; but she nodded none the less. Even without her blushing Gambit knew very well that Miranda didn’t share things easily, let alone things that were this personal and delicate in nature, slowly turning while still leaning on the wall. His taller and broader frame easily shaded her from his side of the building, shielding her from view now that her invisibility didn’t.

“Okay, let me stress this; you not wanting to do certain things because they scare you is not maliciously withholding some kind of experience from anyone and your fears are not dumb. Discussing options and alternatives is one thing, but if either of you give a no on something then it’s completely off the table until whoever said no decides they want to put it back on the table as an option, alright?

It ain’t a tally, fifolet. Neither of you should be holding some kind of score point system or acting like either of you is in debt to the other like one of you only has one act to the other’s four, that’s not how it works, that’s not how it should work and I feel safe in betting that Kurt definitely doesn’t want you to feel like you owe him anything.

Look, all of this? It’s coming from a kind place. You’re right, there is a lot less focus on the nerves and worries of an inexperienced male partner, the fact that you want to focus on that just shows all the more that you love him. The only advice I can give you there is to ask the same questions he asks you, ask him if he’s comfortable and if everything’s alright, that’s the only way to do it.”

“I.. do ask if he’s comfortable and okay with things. I…”

“Then you’re doing fine, though these are perfectly normal concerns to have. Miranda,” Gambit said, pulling her attention back to him, “one more thing; oui, he is inexperienced, but so are you. He deserves to be treated gently and with respect, so do you. With the both of ya just starting out, there is nothing boring about just sticking to the basics if you’re still learning what the basics even are. I’m sure you have the technical know-how, but I also think you never expected to need it. So find that folder stored away in the back of your mind, give it another read through, consult some of the books in the library, and for right now, don’t bother picking up any ‘expert manuals’, alright? Ain’t a race, the both of ya should take as long as you want to just explore the starting point together. You can worry about the whole notion of “spicing things up” later on this shared journey, alright?”  

She let out a soft sigh that sounded a lot more relieved than it had before, and Gambit further softened at seeing her relax even just a little. Well.. that sure was different, he noted to himself. Miranda had never been so open and honest about something so sensitive and private to her, ever before, not to him. The fact that she had specifically requested his advice on this matter made him feel weirdly honored; because he could sense that it hadn’t been easy for her to-

His brain halted for a moment, before recalling various moments where Miranda had fully and whole heartedly insisted to him that she wanted nothing to do with all of this. How she rolled her eyes when he was flirting with Shadow, how she backed out of conversations and jokes that turned too lewd for her liking. Merde, of course talking about any of this wasn’t easy for her even when setting aside her usual need for privacy anyway.

Miranda had established herself as someone not down for any of this, and yet here was the Invisible Menace who was usually so stubbornly steadfast in her convictions; telling him she changed her mind. No, telling him one of her root ideas had shifted and changed. That something she saw as a truth she knew about herself was no longer so. She wasn’t just opening up about something private and sensitive, she was showing him a recently changed piece of herself.

Suddenly, the conversation held even more weight to him than it already did, feeling like he was handed something incredibly fragile and given the choice to shatter it right there and then or let it deepen the bond between them.

“I’m happy for you.”

Green eyes met red ones in silent confusion, while Gambit just gave her a warm and honest smile

“Ya found someone who you feel so much for that you’re wanting to explore and experience new things I don’t think you ever considered in your wildest dreams you would ever want. And it’s with the kindest soul I have ever known to walk this earth, so you made an excellent choice. I know for a fact he’s going to treat you right. So, genuinely, I’m happy for you.”

“… Thanks,” Miranda said, her mouth clearly dry from her nerves as the blush on her face still wasn’t letting up, “I… For everything. Saying you’re happy for me, helping me with this.”

“Any time, fifolet. Was that all?”

Her eyes slowly went back to the forest line, allowing herself a moment in silence to think if that really was all. No, it wasn’t. There was something more she had to say.

“Remy?”

“Mh?”

She turned to him, her eyes momentarily flitting away again before she made herself look into his ruby red eyes trying to convey her truth through them.

“I don’t think I’ve ever told you what a great, wonderful friend you are and that I consider myself lucky to call you my friend. That Shadow is lucky to have you, and that I look up to you. That I’m proud of you, proud of having you as a brother. Thank you for being in my life; it really is better with you in it.”

He couldn’t help it. The words stabbed through his chest like a knife to his heart, no matter that they were spoken so gently and with such warmth and truth to them. The idea that anyone was proud of him touched him right in an old wound that still after all these years hadn’t healed right. Red and black eyes started to water enough that a single tear managed to escape, and Miranda’s demeanor immediately softened as she gently pulled him into a supportive hug, not even flinching when he pressed his face to the top of her shoulder and took a breath to pull himself together.

“Petite, this was supposed to be me supporting you, not the other way ‘round,” he huffed as he desperately tried to get his emotions back in line.

“Support’s a two way street. I’m here for you if you ever need me, alright?”

“… Thank you.”

[polyhexian]

The more I think about it the more I love the Jasper/Enoch rivalry.

Well, to be fair, I think Jasper actively hates her, and she's just there. She's murder daughter because she sees murder as the best way to achieve her goals, not because she enjoys murdering people. She's not looking for a fight, she just calls it as she sees it, and she sees Jasper as un unimpressive wimp who failed to kill Belos because he was too sentimental.

Enoch: I'm just saying, you could totally have killed him if your feelings hadn't gotten in the way.

Jasper: EXCUSE YOU, IT TOOK A LOT OF EFFORT FOR ME TO RECOGNIZE THAT I WAS CAPABLE OF FEELINGS.

Enoch: Yeah, ironic.

Jasper can't comprehend this kid. She knew she was a person?? with EMOTIONS??? AND SHE THREW THEM AWAY??? Jasper took 12 years to come to terms with the fact that his feelings WERE real and they DID affect him and they DID matter and meanwhile this kid had just decided emotions were useless and didn't bother with them??

Jasper: HOW was someone who HAD emotions and KNEW she was a person BETTER at locking all those feelings away than I ever was??

Enoch: Skill issue.

Jasper: AKLSDJFDKASJFJDSLKAHDJFKAASDFKDSD

Caitlyn: To be fair, I didn't exactly do a good job modeling feelings for her.

Jasper sobbing around a bottle of god-knows-what while Caleb awkwardly pats his back and Jasper's like "Hunter's gonna end up like ENOCH."

Tell: Okay on the one hand I can see how that'd be distressing, but Jasper, that IS my kid.

Enoch: No, no, he has a point. I still failed to kill Belos. We should be hoping that Hunter is even better than me at killing Belos. *watches Hunter follow his uncle around with stars in his eyes* But in all honesty he's shaping up to be a spectacular disappointment.

Jasper: YOU TAKE THAT BACK.

She doesn't really hate Hunter, probably. She thinks his loyalty is stupid, obviously, but like. When he was a baby she just saw him as an obstacle Jasper failed to overcome, and as the Golden Guard she's like "when I was his age I was actively plotting an assassination", and after Hunter runs away she's like "well he's got half the right idea now that he knows the truth but of COURSE he's just running away, ugh" and then Hunter attempts to murder-suicide himself and Belos and she's like OH YES FINALLY OKAY RESPECT ACQUIRED GET IT BOY!

She probably can't even fault him for not succeeding in killing Belos. Like that wasn't his fault. He gave an honest shot at it and for all we know the only reason it didn't work is cuz Camila pulled Hunter out of the water which let Belos depossess him.

She just judges everyone by how close they got to killing Belos and what made them fail, and the people who get judged the harshest are the ones who came close but failed for whatever she perceives as a stupid reason. Virtue, John, Temperance? Not even worth judging over this, they were too stupid to even think about killing him. Dust? An attempt was made, not a very good one but it's not like he had much time to think about it, he can have a You Tried sticker. Miles? Should've used those bombs on BELOS, yeesh, and he was more concerned with running away than with killing the guy, BUT he earns a lot of points for spending his final moments writing out a warning to anyone who'd come after, which may eventually lead to Belos's death, so A for effort. Jasper? Colossal disappointment, oh my god, you literally HAD HIM, IF IT WASN'T FOR THE BABY YOU WOULD'VE KILLED HIM, GOD. Hunter? Disappointingly brainwashed, but the moment he decided to kill Belos, he WENT for it, and she can respect that.

Luz? Oh my god she's probably so pissed at Luz. Like. You beat him! You literally beat him! You had god-given powers the likes of which no witch has ever been graced to wield, you took him out when he was arguably at his most powerful, and YOU DIDN'T EVEN TAKE THE SHOT?? YOU LET THE RAIN DO IT? AND THEN YOU LET RAINE AND EDA AND KING DO IT?? WHAT DOES IT FEEL LIKE TO WASTE MY DREAM???

So yeah, just. Jasper actively hating Enoch, and Enoch passively hating Jasper.

Jasper: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT???

Enoch: Why are you booing me? I'm right.

In the far distant future, Darius passes away from old age, and one way or another, he's finally going to see Jasper again--

Darius: Jasper. I spent sixteen years having beef with a child, and then I felt extremely bad about it, and strove to become a better person. And now I have died, and I find out YOU'VE spent the last SIXTY years having beef with a child??

Jasper, glaring at Enoch in yet another staring contest: When I first met her, she'd been dead longer than I'd been alive.

Darius: I just feel like maybe I beat myself up a little too much regarding how upset you'd be at how I treated Hunter.

Jasper: YOU were a dick to a brainwashed child soldier who needed healthy adult relationships in his life because you were misplacing your anger and grief. I am having a mutual standoff with someone who ACTUALLY believes I'm a failure for NOT LETTING MY BABY DIE, and who continues to be a bitch despite having DECADES since her death to figure out how to not be.

Enoch: I don't "believe" you're a failure, it's just an objective fact.

Jasper: ALSKDJKSDAJFKLJDSKLFSDKLFK

Darius: I can see why your ortet keeps the liquor cabinet well stocked.

Uruwydhfjdijebrg riqyshJFGHEHAH I'm fucking OBSESSED jasper having genuine beef with a fifteen year old and desperately trying to justify why that's different from Darius having beef with hunter and he has a lot of points but he keeps saying "SHES OLDER THAN ME LIKE SHE LIVED LONGER THAN I DID AND SHE HAD SO MUCH MORE AGENCY AND ALSO SHES BEEN DEAD LONGER THAN I WAS ALIVE LIKE COME ON

Enoch: Darius you were mean to a brainwashed child soldier. How could you possibly not see what was happening and realize it was evil?

Darius: I know, and you're right, I should have been kinder. I wish that I-

Enoch: how could you not see Belos was evil right then and there?? Like, he killed your boyfriend and you didn't even murder him for it?

Darius: I mean. I.

Enoch: pussy

Jasper: come on

Darius like okay I get why JASPER is still here watching hunter sixty years later but why are YOU still here

Tell: Enoch won't leave

Enoch: for the bit, mostly

Enoch fucking... ROASTING previous Grimwalkers.

Miles: Had no reason to seek vengeance yet. Passable if only because he is so early in the timeline respects the viciousness of his ending. The anger and the commitment to warning the future.

Virtue: loser who died too fast and didn't learn to think for himself

Dust: easily manipulated but most of them are since they've been groomed to be. Hard turned at the end, respect. Willing to take child hostage +10 points for commitment. Ultimately a failure but she'd share a beer with him

Temperance: idiot loser who didn't even learn anything

Caleb: you RAISED his ass and didn't see he was an evil fuck? Wow. Yeah sympathy is great huh tell that to the kid you didn't raise shit lips

Jasper: you're the fucking worst oh my god. You had the best chance and threw it away. Absolutely pathetic. You're grounded kid

Tell: lame dad. Complacent and pessimistic. I want a bed time story but also you're mid af

She's just like. The worst. They're all dead they've had to get past the point of "she might actually be evil and I don't really want her here" and just have to live with this thing in the house and she's emboldened by the fact she is tolerated

[thecrazedpotato]

Bocchi The Rock Review!!!!!!!!!!

So overall, I really enjoyed this series. The entire time it has been entertaining and comedic, and the Kessoku Band are entertaining throughout the entire runtime. Especially Ryo, Ryo is awesome as heck. I do feel the ending could've been a bit better for reasons I'll explain in the spoiler segment, it didn't really feel all that climactic, but to be fair the climax of the season was at the beginning of episode 12 so the rest is falling action and setting up for a season 2, which I am very much hoping will get greenlit in the near future because it would be VERY disappointing if this anime ended here.

SPOILERY THOUGHTS BELOW YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!!

So episode 12 started off REALLY strong with the concert, it was really fulfilling to see how far the Kessoku Band has come, and especially how far Hitori has come as a person, the girl who could barely make eye contact or speak when handing a drink to a customer is now playing in front of a huge live audiene, that part where one of her strings broke before her solo but then she improvised was really cool, it was awesome.

But then Kita made Hitori do a speech in the middle of the concert and it caused her to panic and do a stage dive because she had no idea what to say or do so she went unconscious and they had to call off the concert early. I feel like at this point Kita would know better than to put Hitori on the spot like that, and I really do think she should've apologized to Hitori since she pretty much caused that. To be fair Hitori had the courage to play in front of an audience so I guess Kita overestimated her confidence, and doing a stage dive was not really a good choice on Hitori's end, but still Kita should've apologized to Hitori after Hitori apologized to Kita for ruining the concert.

Anyway after that the rest of the finale is them getting a new guitar for Bocchi because the old one broke. It's definitely not bad, it's still entertaining Bocchi shenanigans, but I feel like there's way more of it than there should've been. Maybe have more concert time, like they play one more song before Kita pushes Hitori to do a speech (or better yet Bocchi gets so confident and excited that she does the stage dive thing herself and falls to the floor that would've been really funny), or maybe put the end of episode 11 where they get ready for the concert at the beginning of episode 12, though the drawback would be that 11 wouldn't have as much important stuff going on.

Speaking of, yeah episode 11 is definitely the weakest episode for me. I feel kinda bad because a large factor of it is that this episode shoves a bunch of fanservice animeisms in your face (everyone wears maid outfits, the swimsuit gag, etc) and that's not really my thing so it's kinda the weakest by default. The problem with this is that means there's less important stuff going on, which like yeah I know this is a slice of life show but the concert is about to happen I don't think we should be doing all this fanservice-y stuff in the middle of it. I don't hate this episode, it's still got that charm the rest of the show has and it's still very funny, that post-apocalyptic biker gang is probably one of the show's funniest bits. And I do like Ryo in a tux that was really cool. And fortunately there isn't a ton of this animeism/weird stuff in the entire series, like the only other major animeism is in episode 2 when Hitori is getting in the ice cube bathtub and it shows her in her swimsuit and that's literally just the opening of that episode that that's basically it.

So yeah, rad anime, it may have lost its balance a bit near the end but it still stood on the rope. Again I am SERIOUSLY hoping season 2 gets greenlit I will be very upset if it doesn't, I am currently debating on if I get a Hitori figure or a Ryo nendoroid or both from Good smile, you should totally watch it, "I think it's really good"/10