#to be clear you can definitely do a serious version of this and that's even more common and also extremely good

[sunderwight]

I love HOTD fic concepts where Lucaerys and Arrax accidentally kill Vhagar. I want more of them so bad.

Mostly because of the black comedy potential. I could go either way for whether or not Aemond dies too, but jesus that's such a great idea. The oldest, biggest, scariest dragon on the fucking planet and somehow sopping wet twink Lucaerys Velaryon and his tweenage mount manage to take her out? One little alteration and the tone of the whole conflict shifts almost entirely.

Of course some kind of freak intervention is required for it to work, and most of that's still pretty dark. Options I like include Vhagar actually just being so old that she's nearing the end of her lifespan and so it's less that Lucaerys and Arrax successfully kill her, and more that she just happens to die at the worst possible moment for Aemond, or else something like lightning from the active storm striking some of the chains on her (prospects also not good for Aemond with that one), or Arrax gets in a single lucky shot via breathing fire right down her throat and causing a fatal blowback of the whole firebreathing system that is like a 1 in a million chance type thing.

But then what? Everyone at Storm's End saw Aemond flip his shit at Luke and go chasing after him, plus Arrax is like snack-sized compared to Vhagar, you can't even plausibly lie and claim that somehow they instigated the conflict, not even with Luke's history of successfully landing critical hits against his uncle. Not that the "we're the victims" approach would necessarily do the Greens strict favors here, since Aemond's a grown man now and his side are hinging a lot of their cause on appealing to the same brand of Westerosi toxic masculinity that views losing a fight as a sign that the gods don't like you enough.

I haven't seen it yet but I also think it would be really funny if the Greens tried to paint Lucaerys as this like, unholy terror? Like they just have to exaggerate how horrible this one teenager is in order to salvage any shred of dignity from the situation. He is death from the skies! Tried to murder his uncle in cold blood when they were but babes! Thirsted for violence and slaughter ever since! The mad dog son acts at the behest of the evil false queen who spawned him, truly he is Maegor come again! A sinister bastard! And they're talking about this Disney Channel ass kid:

We can all hear the dramatic score from the show gradually distort into circus music in the back of our minds, right?

[riizebabie444]

𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 🌸

🌸 ─── hey all here is a romantic reading to get in the mood for the spring! this reading will look into who your person is (so think carefully about your person) and what they love or will love about you. as always, enjoy!

🌸 ─── picking your pile: take a deep breath and allow your soul to centre itself. when you feel your mind balanced and cleared, allow yourself to be drawn to an image. your eyes may gravitate to one, or you may close your eyes and feel which image is calling out.

🌸 ─── be sure to check out my other readings and don’t forget to share and give feedback. disclaimer: all readings done are for entertainment only. please do not use my tarot readings as a replacement for legitimate advice.

🌸 ─── masterlist. paid readings. exchange rules.

donations. games/events. feedback.

pile one

who is your person

cards: emperor rv, nine of pentacles, three of swords

honestly pile one your person is coming across like an ex or an old flame. it seem to me that you have shyed away from each other. if you do not have an ex that you are thinking of, it could be someone you meet in the future but you will separate somehow. they will be a very important lover in your life. this person, you or the relationship with them could be immature, generally speaking. you both weren't ready for it. there may have been committment issues or loyalty issues. honestly, i'm thinking you or this person is still hung up on the relationship, or both of you could feel this way.

i do not see this person as your life partner, but the relationship you had with them is an important one in your life. i'm also seeing them as the one that got away. the person who seemed perfect but it still somehow ended with heartache. i also think that for a small number of you, this could be someone from you past who you did not have a romantic relationship with, but there are still romantic feelings involved. overall, this is definitely someone from the past, or someone who will become your past. there is betrayal and hurt here. it didn't end on great terms, but the connection (beginning, during and end) hold significance in your life

could be an ex or someone from you past, someone you may have parted with recently. could also be someone from you past that you have not been romantically involved with or attracted to, however, they do have romantic feelings towards you.

whart do they love about you

cards: two of cups rv, nine of cups, ten of wands rv

they love the essence of you, your true and authentic version. you're not like anyone they've known or been with. you learned how to love yourself even when you didn't want to. they struggled to feel the same way for themselves so they knew you were someone special, someone they could learn from. however, they weren't mature enough to do the same, they could only watch and wish it could be them. they admire you in that way, you can pick yourself up, whereas they need others to help them up when they're down. they honestly compare themselves to you a lot.

nine of cups came up and again, it's making me think of "the one that got away." i think you are perfect in their eyes. they believe you are the perfect person to have a serious, long term relationship with. maybe even marriage. but it didn't work out and they have a hard time getting over it because they know it will be almost impossible to find someone as perfect again. they love how content you are in any situation, you can always see the good things. they often wonder how you can be so content and abundant, without realising that only a small mindset shift can allow them to feel the same. except, they are not ready to grow up in that aspect.

they also love your ability to multi-task. you can juggle so many things at once. even if you feel overwhelmed, you don't show it. when i think about how this person loves you, it's more that you are someone they look up to, someone they wish they could be more akin to. kind of like a role model, and they expected to much while at the same time did not fulfil expectations placed on them. i think they realised they hindered your progress, so they loved that you still chose them and loved them back, at least while it lasted. you can be soemone who tries to do too much all by yourself. although they cared about you, they still loved this about you. they loved that you don't give up, that you're confident you can do all these things. they love all these incredible aspects of you, but in the end the love they gave you didn't express those deeper and truer feelings of their love for you.

pile two

who is your person

cards: high priestess, two of swords, king of pentacles

instantly i am seeing you know who this person is. so if you are asking about a current partner, this reading is about them. if you're asking about your future spouse, this reading will be about them. whoever you had in mind while choosing this reading, it will likely be about them. this is a person who is spiritually enlightening, they show you how to grow, to see the world in a new way. they have a rich inner world and you will feel honoured to have them share it with you.

i do see future spouse for pile two, but i do not think marriage is the necessity for all who chose pile two. it's likely this person will be a serious, long term partner. ultimately, someone who you settle down with for a significant period of your life. they are someone who seeks harmony above all. they don't like chaotic and uneasy situations. even in a relationship, they work on maintaining the peace. they hate arguing. they are very balanced and make decisions carefully. they seem smart both emotionally and intellectually. they have a good balance. they also seem abundant and successful. they are a good provider and they have ambitions they want to share with you.

what do they love

cards: ace of cups, the magician, eight of cups

they love that you are their best friend. i'm seeing friends to lovers here for most of you. it could indicate your person being a childhood friend, or it could be someone you meet in the future who you will be friends with first before exploring anything romantic with them. you are like a good omen to them. i'm seeing that good things happen to them when they are around you more. they think of you like their lucky charm. you spread joy in their life and bring triumph to them. they love how happy and at peace it feels with you.

you could be a particularly energetic person. if not, maybe around them you have more energy or they get so excited when around you. you're like a mood booster for them. honestly pile two your person feels so adorable, they love everything about you! they would always find something new to love about you. if manifestation is a big thing in your life, i'm definitely seeing that they love those powers you have. they love that they can share it with you. they love how creative you are, you can make the most from anything. you always find a way out. i think you may have left something big and important behind when moving through life, and they admire the strength you had to do that. they love that you can let go when necessary, how you always know when to face you fears but also when it's not worth facing them, but to instead leave them behind and grow into a new person.

pile three

who is your person

cards: king of wands, ace of pentacles, five of cups

this feels like a spouse, if you are asking about a current or future spouse. he also feels quite masculine. it could also be a boyfriend or partner who radiates a lot of masculinity. this person is not so concerned with creativity and compassion. he may be a proud person, stubborn also. but he is a good leader. he works well in a team and is empowering to others, often without realising. this person is a doer, he is action oriented. while he may be creative in the way that he makes things or makes things happen, i mean he isn't creative in the sense that he is concerned about hobbies etc. like, his hobbies centre around consuming rather than creating.

i think this is someone you will meet or have met through career, finance or anything work related. maybe not all of you, some could also meet them through friends and family, or online even. he is financially well-off. tends to have stable relationships but most of the time, relationships are not his priority, the work is. deep down your person has a lot of sadness, loneliness, despair even. they have achieved a lot in life, mostly in terms of career or money. but they do have regrets and disappointments. they have things they need to forgive themselves for.

what do they love about you

cards: six of wands, queen of cups, seven of cups

oh they see you as the prize. like, i'm lowkey getting playboy vibes from this person but it's not strong. some of you may be dealing with an extreme playboy, while others may be dealing with a normal guy just with committal issues. but in terms of them approaching you and being with you, it's making me feel like you are the catch and they caught you. and they feel even more successful in life when they are with you. they like to show you off and i'm seeing...if you like being showed off, they will love it. and if you're shy about being shown off, they will still love it becuase they find you so cute. you will be an achievement or milestone to them, and they will love that you are this person for them. someone that can make them feel fulfilled in their unique way.

they love how self-confident you are and although i see some of you have confidence issues, they will still love it because they can relate. i think you will bring them down from a high horse, your humilty and down to earth-ness will give them a new perspective and they will love that you of all people did that for them. they love your compassion and sympathy, your authenticity. how you can be real when they can't. i'm seeing they also love how you embrace them. they daydream about being in your arms. they love how dreamy you are, they think you're ethereal. like, i'm literally seeing you are the person everyone wants to wife/husband up. so when they get you, you can bet they are over the moon. though, you may be a little detached from reality, a hopeless romantic, obsessed with the ideas in your head. it is the complete opposite to them as you are a dreamer and they are a doer. but ther still love it about you. they inspire you and sometimes force you to make something of your goals and ambitions, but they also love that you are on your own path even if it is different.

pile four

who is your person

cards: page of cups, knight of swords rv, the devil rv

i have a feeling that this will be a long term partner or even a spouse, but for some of you it could be someone you meet randomly. you will meet this person out of the blue, and the relationship or love you have with them will be completely unexpected. this is someone who will change you life massively. this connection will be based on intellectual compatibility which may be why you seem so drawn to them in the beginning, and also why this relationship grows deeper without you expecting it to. it will be a very strong bond, but i do see communication issues happening nonetheless.

honestly, for some this could be a person you break up with, or it may possibly end in divorce. for some, this could even be about a current partner but you are thinking about or are on the verge of breaking up. while this this person can inspire much love and many emotions regarding the connection you share, i am indeed seeing negative emotional patterns. so separating from them will break you free from their bad habits. hm i see maybe you could be the one with bad habits, and they are stepping away from you. there are many options with this pile. honestly, while your person seems life they are a long term or serious partner, they are not your person for life. they still love you, but it doesn't feel like a strong or healthy kind of love. so although you may be blinded by love or in a honeymoon phase etc (or this could be you and your person in the future) there is a lot of careless choices made, and lots of forgiving for things that shouldn't be forgiven. you person seems like a strongly emotional, smart person. but they're not the right one for you, i am seeing.

what do they love about you

cards: ten of wands, ace of swords, ace of cups rv

so despite the above descriptions of you person, they do still hold love for you. they love many things about you. i'm seeing that this person feels or knows they are a burden to you, but they love that you still love them anyway. for some it is that gratitude for your unconditional love, even when they're not in the best position. but for others, i do think it is felt more in a negative way. they love you because they know you still love them no matter the way they treat you. they know you won't leave or establish the standards you want in a relationship because you love them either way. i didn't get messages like this one for the other piles, but i am hearing that you really need to examine your lifestyle, if loving them is or will be worth it. they like how responsible you are. it's refreshing compared to their immaturity and carelessness.

okay they also like that you are intellectual, i see a stimulating mental bond. you always find a way to break through problems, even if the pass to success is challenging you make it through. they love your ideas. you could have random thoughts and tell them about it and they find it so odd but so cute and endearing. they love being the one you tell those things to. i'm honestly seeing jobs, projects, work etc. it's not clear exactly how they love those things about you, maybe they love your job, seeing you work, you could be successful at work or in other projects. they love seeing you succeed but i do also see some being insecure and jealous. and others possibly leeching from your hard work. it truly does feel magical with you, they understand your value. but again, there is another message here to focus on your wellbeing. you are repressing emotions and avoiding self love and care in favour of this person and relationship. i'm trying to explain what your person loves about you but all i'm hearing is that you deserve better, make from that what you will.

pile five

who is your person

cards: the artist rv, eight of cups, queen of pentacles

this person could be a creator or a naturally creative person, but they have blockages. their intuition is a mess. they may be or feel disconnected from the world or reality. this is definitely a partner, i'm seeing a current person. if you are asking about your future spouse, this could be the energy they are currently experiencing. they're kind of in a slump right now. but whoever they are, they are working hard to be financially stable. they have abandonment issues. they need a change in perspective, something new and fresh in life.

i see that they are someone who can focus on nurturing, they want to provide for others, and they will get to that point. oh, i'm seeing that their most evolved self will be a provider, a hard worker. not necessarily successful but they work hard and have a warm, generous personality. they would do anything for the people they love. but right now, they're in a rut, so their energy is a little difficult to pick up. they are so caring, and they learn to also care for themselves which they have not always done in the past. i also see they are very talented. they are such a family person, responsible and accountable. i'm really feeling this person will have a mental, spiritual, emotional glow up. when you meet them/this version of them, they will be so down to earth and warm.

what do they love about you

cards: the fool, seven of swords rv, six of swords rv

oh god when i tell you they feel like a fool in love for you. in the past i think they did not believe in a love like this. they thought love, marriage, family is an obligation. they didn't prepare for those things out of a deep desire for it. sure, they wanted love. but it was more because of society or their family telling them it is their duty to have a family or wishing for them to find love one day. so they don't really know what to expect. i'm seeing you could be their first love, first relationship or first person they will ever really love like this. whether you last forever or not, you for sure are this person's forever love. when they meet you and begin dating you, it is like stepping into a whole new world for them. the relationship you have will be a turning point for them. if you are already with them, then your relationship will take a turning point when they go through these personal changes. they have issues from the past but i'm seeing they love you because you understand them, are empathetic of their past, and their mistakes.

i think they may have a dark secret or a mistake from the past. this somehow has a lot to do with their love for you. maybe you forgave them for a mistake, or they trusted you to tell you their secret. it's this kind of thing that makes them love you so much. someone to lean on and trust after a life time of not being able to trust. i think they have tried so many times to change, to make circumstances different or better but it has not worked. but suddenly with you, everything changes for the better. they love that you were their lucky charm, you give them the motivation to keep going. you inspire them so much that even if the future brings troubles, they will jump ahead anyway instead of giving up or being anxious about the future. like, literally turned into a fearless fool because of the love they have for you. they love you so much because they've never had a person like you before who can make them feel this way.

© riizebabie444 — all rights reserved. please do not copy, steal, repost or translate my readings on any site. any act of which will be classed as plagiarism.

[justliketoreadsowhat]

Saturday Night Lights ❦

- 𝐜𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐫𝐛 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 -

𝐀/𝐧 ; 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝, 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝 ♥︎, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 & 𝐈’𝐦 𝐬𝐨 𝐠𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐈 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐦 𝐫𝐞-𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐞.

____________________________________________

“You look so beautiful tonight” Paige expressed her admiration for you, her eyes roaming across your features relentlessly, it became like a second nature to her, no matter where you two were. 

As for tonight, the Washington Spirts Soccer game was one of the many side quests you two had planned together. If there was ANY women’s sporting event occurring within a 30-mile radius, you could bet money you two would be in attendance. 

“Mmm.. so what about all the other nights?” you teased, knowing you’d be amused by her reaction, you just loved to egg her on. 

She clicked her tongue at your antics, “You look beautiful every night baby, but you already knew that” her tone low and soft eyeing your facial expression.  

“Ewww! Can you guys stop being so cringey and watch the game” Drew groaned dramatically, moving over 2 seats away from the two of you. He never failed to make you laugh even though he was being so serious, he was definitely a 2.0 version of Paige. 

“Just relax and eat the popcorn you begged me for”, she side-eyed him playfully

“Now you’re just dragging it, I can’t wait until Azzi gets here” shaking his head shamelessly, fixing his pride hat in the process. 

“She’s not gonna save you Drew” you laughed, reaching over to flip the top of his hat inside out. You loved messing with him every chance you got, over the past few months, he’s become one of your greatest little sick kicks. “Eh she might, y’know she has her favorite children, too bad you’re not one of them” she shrugged. 

“Not too much on Drew!” you snapped, mushing her face into your hands. “Guys! stop you’re on the big screen, look!” 

Both of your eyes jolted upwards, only to meet eyes with the jumbotron zooming in on the two of you. The stadium erupted with loud cheers and applause that shook the seats. 

“They left out Drew” she muttered through her cinematic smile, waving at the screen. 

Without a 2nd thought, you pulled Drew back to his designated seat next to you, he cheesed at the screen with delight 

“Yeah that’s definitely getting posted on Tiktok, guess you’ll have more to add to your collection hm?” a familiar voice rang from behind you. “Azzi! finally, I was getting tourtered out here” Drew said exasperated, pulling her down into a tig hug. 

“Wow so now we’re lying for fun” her nose scrunched up in disbelief, “remember those words” 

“Gosh what did ya’ll do to him this time?, kiss??” she questioned lingering with sarcasm. 

“No! we’d never do that“ 

“THATS A LIE! I still remember that day I caught you guys outside-“ 

“Okay anyways!” you intervene, saving yourself the embarrassment of re-living the moment. “There’s a spokesperson heading our way so act like civil human beings” 

“I already talked during the Mystic game so I’m clocked out for the day” Azzi sighed, climbing over the row of seats to sit next to Drew “Paige this is all you” tilting her head to the woman who stood near the railings waiting for people to clear the path. 

“I don’t even know what to say..” she trailed off, her fingers lightly tapping your forearm trying to gather her thoughts, her social battery had to be low by this point, but she would never turn down an opportunity to speak out at events, a professional yapper in her natural habitat always thrives. 

“Come with me” she asserted standing up to her full frame as you remained planted in your seat. There is no way you were going to endure a microphone being shoved in your face for thousands of people to see, being on the big screen was good enough for you. 

“What am I supposed to say?!” you said barely above a whisper. Your brain began to rattle with scenarios 

“Just stand there and look pretty like you always do” her hands met yours as she gently peeled you from your seat.

“Don’t forget to make eye contact, it gets em everytime” Azzi winked, you chuckled at her antics, she was so effortlessly charming, although she’d never admit it. 

“Make sure you remind her to blink, sometimes she forgets” Drew laughs, popcorn spilling from the bucket he soon forgets he was supposed to be holding. 

Paige swung her arm across his lap, sending the popcorn flying across the stands. “Make sure you clean up your mess, sometimes you forget” she grits. You gasped trying your best not to bring any more attention to the scene unfolding. Pulling her away from the seats you made your way to the spokeswoman. 

What a fun way to spend your Saturday night, and to think it was only the beginning. 

[firewasabeast]

can you do a fic based on the idea that athena and tommy will team up to fly the plane to safety? idk if it doesn't really happen in the show, I'd love a fic version!

disclaimer: I know nothing about planes, nor do I pretend to. we're all just going to smile and nod as we read through this, just like we do when we watch 911. the idea for this fic comes from @mannafromtevan's theory, which is incredible and I hope is true! Also, while looking for the link to this theory, I saw where @bibuckkinard already wrote a fic based on this theory as well. I haven't read it yet, but everything they write is incredible and will definitely be better than this. Anyway, enjoy!

A small aircraft hit the plane. Co-pilot was ejected. The pilot enabled autopilot, but she's unconscious. There's no one to fly the plane!

That was the call that Athena had with air traffic control just after the incident. It had sent more than half of LA's emergency personnel to the nearest airport, the 217 taking lead on the operation.

Everyone was hovered around, listening as Tommy spoke to Athena and tried to get as much information as he could in what little amount of time they had.

“And you said a window was blown out?” Tommy asked.

“Yes. A window and then some.”

“Wide enough for a person to fit through?”

“The co-pilot did.”

Tommy was quiet for a moment. Long enough for Athena to come back over the radio. “Tommy? Are you still there?”

“I'm here, Athena. I'm thinking. Just hang on a sec.”

“Oh, sure,” she answered, the sarcasm in her tone was clear. “I've got nowhere else to be.”

Jameson, a pilot who'd been working with Tommy for nearly five years now, stared at him. He knew that face. “You have an idea.” It wasn't a question.

“Yeah, I do.”

“How stupid is it?”

“It has potential.”

“To work?”

Tommy shook his head. “To be the dumbest thing I've ever done.”

*****

“You cannot be serious right now!” Buck exclaimed as Tommy strapped on his gear. The rest of the crew was working on the helicopter behind him, getting it ready to go as quickly as possible. Hen, Chim, and Eddie were there too, standing back while Tommy and Buck spoke.

“It's the best plan we're gonna get. It's the only plan we're gonna get.”

“It's not even a plan! It's a death sentence.”

“Not if I succeed it's not.”

“Tommy-”

“We've done crazier things, Evan. Like flying through a hurricane.”

“Intermittent showers,” Buck corrected. “And I'd say repelling from a helicopter and into a torn apart jet to try and land the thing when half the controls aren't working is a little crazier than flying through bad weather!”

Tommy placed his hands on Buck's shoulders. “Breathe, Evan. The rescue mission was fully approved by all proper authorities.”

“You sure you didn't fake mouth static your way into approval?”

Tommy gave him a look. “There might've been a few omissions. I cannot confirm or deny that though.”

“Tommy.”

“Hey, what's our motto?” he said, looking past Buck and pointing to the rest of the 118.

“Who cares?!” They chanted.

“Me!” Buck exclaimed. “I care!” He followed behind Tommy as he headed for the chopper. “Tommy, please don't-”

Tommy turned on his heels, nearly running straight into Buck as he did so. “Evan,” he started, his voice calm and assured, “If you knew how to fly, you'd already be up there.”

“But-”

“Am I wrong?”

Buck pursed his lips, eying Tommy closely before replying. “No.”

“I've gotta go. I will do my best to make it back to you, Evan. I promise that.”

That was it for Buck. He didn't care who was around. He tugged Tommy by his gear, and pulled him in for a kiss. “Be safe.”

Tommy nodded, giving Buck's hand a squeeze before running to the helicopter. Buck took a deep breath, holding back his tears as he watched them take off.

*****

It took time, and a lot of precision, for Tommy to finally reach the opening of the plane. There were a few close calls along the way, but once Athena had ahold of his legs, he allowed himself to relax a little.

“Good to see you, Athena,” Tommy said with a smile once he had successfully made it inside the plane.

“I'm not sure if good is the correct word to be using right now,” Athena replied. “But I am glad you're here.”

“Happy to be here.” Tommy disconnected himself from all the wiring he was attached to, guiding it back out of the hole so the helicopter could return to base.

Athena moved some debris out of the way, making room for Tommy to sit in pilot's seat. There were lights flashing everywhere, some repetitive beeping from alarms, not to mention the giant hole that was allowing wind to whip through the cockpit.

“What do you think?” Athena asked as he pressed some buttons, his face scrunched up tight.

He flipped a switch on one of the control panels, which caused the entire thing to fall off the dash.

“Well, that's not helpful,” he said, tossing it aside. “So, got any plans this weekend?”

She glared over at him. “Wasn't really thinking that far ahead.”

“I was thinking about taking Evan for a helicopter tour around the city... May be in bad taste now though.”

Athena sat beside him, a light sheen of sweat across her forehead. “Tommy, give it to me straight here. How screwed are we?”

He shrugged, keeping his focus on the controls that were still connected to the plane. “You believe in God?”

“I do.”

“Mind praying for us both then?”

“That bad?”

Before Tommy could respond, his captain's voice was coming over the radio in his helmet. “Give me a rundown, Kinard. What's going on?”

Athena listened as Tommy went through a (very long) list of everything wrong with the plane. He went over controls that were damaged, and the very few that weren't. She heard something about autopilot still working well, and something else about a manual landing, but most of it made no sense to her.

“I'm gonna need you to repeat all of that,” Athena said once he was finished, “but in a way I'll actually understand.”

He glanced over at her briefly, the plane jumping with sudden turbulence. Athena grabbed onto the the broken panel in front of her and Tommy focused his eyes back on the controls. “We're running low on fuel. We're gonna have to try to land after the next turn, and we'll end up dropping pretty fast. Basically, I can land us manually, but I can't promise the breaks will work.”

“That seems like a pretty important part of landing,” she deadpanned.

“I'd definitely say it's a favorite of mine.”

Athena took a deep breath before asking her next question. “And if the breaks don't work? What happens then?”

“There's a very high chance this thing will blow up if we can't stop by the end of the runway.”

“Oh dear God.”

“There is good news though.”

“Hm.” She eyed him skeptically. “What's that?”

“We won't feel a thing.”

“Oh, well, that's a relief. Don't know what I was ever worried about in the first place,” she replied sarcastically. “How much time do we have before you land her?”

“About ten minutes. Intercom system is out, right?”

“Yes.”

“Can you go make sure everyone has their seatbelts fastened?”

Athena headed back to the passengers. Tommy took the moment alone to breathe deeply and steal himself for whatever was about to happen. Part of being a pilot required confidence and, even if he didn't have much of it at the moment, he knew how to play the part.

Fake it til you make it.

He'd done that a lot over the years. It worked in a professional sense, not so much in a personal one.

A couple minutes later, Athena returned. “All buckled in,” she informed him as she went to sit in the co-pilot's seat again.

“It's actually probably better if you sit in the jump seat behind me,” Tommy said.

“Why? So when we explode my arm doesn't knock you upside the head for getting me killed? Nah, I'm good here.”

Tommy smirked. Even after working with Athena on and off for over twenty years, he'd never spent much time with her. The few dinners he and Evan had with her and Bobby didn't give them much time to banter back and forth. He'd have to make sure and change that once they were on solid ground. “Suit yourself.”

“Can I borrow your helmet for a second?” she asked.

“Sure.” He handed it over and she put it on, clearing her throat.

“Can I speak to Hen Wilson from the 118, please?” she asked over the radio.

A few seconds later, Hen was on the line. “I'm here, Athena. You're on an open channel.”

“Hen, Bobby isn't at the airport, is he?”

“No. He's on his way, but he hasn't made it yet. You want me to put him on with you?”

“No, no!” Athena answered quickly. “No. What I need to say, I can say to you.”

Tommy focused on keeping the plane steady while Athena spoke. It felt wrong to listen in to something as personal as a possible goodbye.

He took the time to think about Evan. The short but wonderful time he'd had with him over the past few months. They'd been the best of his life.

He briefly wondered if he should tell Evan that before he attempted to land, but he decided against it. Evan wouldn't need those thoughts running through his head for the rest of his life if they didn't make it out of this.

“Hey,” Athena's voice brought him out of his thoughts. She nudged his shoulder with the helmet. “Someone wants to talk to you.”

Tommy paused before taking the helmet back. “Go for Kinard.”

“Kinard, this is Buckley of the 118.” Tommy smiled at the sound of Evan's voice, even though he could hear it breaking ever so slightly.

“I hear you, Buckley.”

“I just, um, I wanted you to, um. Tommy.” He cleared his throat. “You've got this, okay? We're all down here waiting. N- Not a single doubt.”

“Good to know. No doubts up here either.”

He ignored the raised eyebrow look from Athena.

“Good. Um, Tommy?”

“Yeah, Evan?”

“I love you.” The words escaped him quickly, but with a confidence that wasn't there before.

Tommy smiled, his heart fluttering. He didn't realize he hadn't spoken until Evan's voice came over the radio again.

“T- Tommy?”

Tommy shook his head, blinking to rid himself of the tears in his eyes. “Chschschsch,” he said, bringing back his renowned fake mouth static, thank you very much. Athena stared over at him in confusion. “Sorry, Buckley, you're cutting out on me. You'll have to repeat that last sentence when I'm on the ground, okay?”

“Yeah,” Evan answered, and Tommy was sure there was a faint smile in his voice. “Yeah, o- okay.”

*****

About a minute later, Tommy was in position and ready to land. He got in contact with everyone on the ground, letting them know where and when he'd be landing. They were all getting into position near the runway, ready to help no matter the outcome.

“You ready?” Tommy asked as Athena tightened her seatbelt.

“Let's land this bastard.”

“Coming in for a landing.”

The closer they got to the ground, the shakier things got. Tommy held tightly onto the controls, trying to ignore the burning in his eyes from all the wind coming in through the hole.

They dropped rapidly, just as he expected they would. Athena kept quiet, and Tommy wondered if she was praying.

A part of him hoped she was.

As the runway got closer and closer into view, Tommy could feel every muscle in his body tightening. “Brace yourself,” he said a few seconds before they hit the ground with a thud.

Screams could be heard coming from the passengers, many of them crying or calling out to whatever god they believed in.

“We're going too fast.” Athena watched as they flew past all the emergency vehicles waiting for them.

“We're okay,” Tommy replied. Fake it til you make it.

They started to slow down, but the end of the runway was drawing near and it was becoming clear they would not be able to stop in time.

“Tommy.”

“We're okay,” he repeated, although it sounded more like a demand.

Athena could see the details of the signs at the end of the runway. “Tommy!”

Suddenly, Tommy turned the plane to loop around to the next runway. As he did, the wing hit a sign that flung backwards, eliciting more yells from the passengers.

The plan, or lack thereof, seemed to work. The plane slowed until it came to a stop.

They were alive.

They were actually alive.

Before he even had time to let it fully sink in, Athena was next to him, wrapping him in an unexpected, but very needed, hug.

“You might be clinically insane,” she said, both of them laughing from all the adrenaline coursing through their bodies. “But I'm so damn glad you are.”

“Why don't we get everyone off this plane?” he asked. “Then go see our guys.”

“I like the sound of that.”

*****

Athena and Tommy made sure they were the last ones off the plane. Athena spotted Bobby first. He had apparently arrived just before the landing and saw the whole thing. Tommy watched them reunite as his eyes darted around looking for his own person.

“It's been decided that I have the coolest, most badass boyfriend in the entire world,” a voice said from behind him.

Tommy whipped around to Evan standing there, arms already open wide, a bright smile on his face. Tommy practically fell into him. They held onto one another so tight that Tommy could have sworn they were melding into one.

“I was so worried,” Buck breathed out, his face pressed into Tommy's neck.

“I thought you had no doubts?” Tommy's voice was muffled against Buck's turnouts. He made no effort to move.

“Like you believed that for a second.”

After holding onto each other a little longer, Tommy pulled back just enough to look Buck in the eyes. “If I remember correctly, you were in the middle of telling me something when my radio started to go out,” he said with a smirk on his face.

Buck brought his hands to Tommy's face, his thumbs stroking Tommy's cheeks. “I love you, Tommy,” he said, and that confidence was back in his voice. “I really, really love you.”

“I love you too, Evan.” He pulled Buck in for a kiss, deep and passionate and filled with all the love they'd been keeping to themselves for the last few months.

The sound of a throat clearing had them, reluctantly, separating from one another. Bobby and Athena were walking up behind them, smiles on both of their faces.

“Athena!” Buck exclaimed, immediately going to her for a hug. “Are you okay?”

“All good,” she answered, “thanks to your man.”

“Thank you, Tommy,” Bobby said, bypassing a handshake and going in for a hug. “You saved a lot of lives tonight.”

He took a deep breath. “All part of the job, right?”

“I think you went far above and beyond the job tonight,” Bobby replied. "Probably have another medal in your future."

Buck's proudly returned to Tommy's side, their arms wrapping around each other's waist.

“You've got a good one here, Buck,” Athena said, patting Tommy on the shoulder. “You should keep him.”

Buck smiled, leaning in for another kiss. “That's the plan.”

[neoneun-au]

CAN'T HELP MYSELF; CHAPTER III: WHO WAITS FOR LOVE?

―PAIRING: wonwoo x fem!reader, mingyu x fem!reader ―GENRE: love triangle au, fluff, mild angst, romantic comedy, suggestive, smut ―CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 11.2k ―CHAPTER WARNINGS: angst, mild language, alcohol consumption, masturbation (explicit female, implied/mentions of male), 18+ only ―STATUS: ongoing

―AUTHOR’S NOTE: i cant link them here, but please find the series masterlist and other chapters on my blog. i would love to know your thoughts on the story so far, this is really only fun with interaction and it helps keep me motivation to finish !

iii: who waits for love?

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.

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“You didn’t mention one of my roommates was basically a fucking model,” you complain, sinking into the absurdly massive grey sectional next to Jeonghan as he sits scrolling on his phone, attention removed from the drama providing background noise on the shared TV. 

“Who? Mingyu?” He tosses his head back with a bark of a laugh at the suggestion, “he’s a model idiot.” 

“Idiot or not you should have warned me he’d be so…so,” you toss your hands in the air, a dramatic display of frustration completed by the furrow in your brows. The image of Mingyu’s bare chest from your initial meeting (new and improved version 2.0 of hot roommate: now accompanied by a soundtrack of bed squeaks and the joy of someone else’s orgasm!) assaults your senses and you scrub it from your mind’s eye as best as you can before fixing your weary gaze back on Jeonghan, “so hot.”

“Oh please,” Jeonghan rolls his eyes as soon as the word falls from your lips. “Yeah he’s easy on the eyes, but once you get to know him his looks are much less impressive, trust me.” He shakes his head, raising his coffee to take a sip before pursing his lips and fixing you with a concerned stare, “I didn’t take you as the type to pine after tall, dark, and stupid. You’re not thinking of using him as a rebound are you?”

“What? Absolutely not,” the reply comes out perhaps more fervently than it should have because what was intended to deny the suggestion only serves to deepen the crease settling in between Jeonghan’s manicured eyebrows. You clear your throat and take a sip from the mug of tea growing cold in your hands as a cover. 

“Rebound,” you scoff at the word, trying to play off the twisting feeling in your gut with derision but only managing to dig the knife in deeper. “Definitely not. I have no plans to start dating anytime soon. Not after this breakup.” You’re aware that you’ve begun to ramble but as per usual, your mouth runs away with your words. Try as you might, you cannot scramble to retrieve them as they spill forward like a damn breaking open. Jeonghan stares at you with a slight frown as you monologue, “I barely even want to look at men full-stop. Don’t get me wrong, I mean, you’re okay, we’re friends and all. And Seungcheol is fine I guess ‘cause he lifted all of my heavy shit up the stairs like some kind of bodybuilding angel sent from protein-heaven,” a stray strand of hair falls in front of your eyes and you blow it away with a short puff of breath. 

“But dating? No. No, no, no,” you continue unabated, “absolutely not. I’m taking this time to get to know me. If anything, I’m dating myself. Mingyu might be hot but he won’t break my resolve, that’s for sure. I am determined,” you finish the speech with a single, firm nod–agreement with yourself clear and solid and in no way capable of breaking at the threat of warm brown puppy eyes flashed in your direction. 

“Right,” Jeonghan drags out the word, unconvinced by your impassioned declaration of independence. “Well, if you get bored of dating yourself and do end up wanting someone to mess around with for a bit, I can hook you up with some people. Serious or…less serious. Your choice.”

“I will be just fine on my own, thank you.” You nod once. Firm. Decisive. Not at all embarrassed by the display. 

“If you say so,” he sings, shaking his head and pushing himself off the couch before flicking the TV off. You sit in silence for a moment, sipping the last of your lukewarm tea, and listen as Jeonghan’ footsteps fade into the kitchen. The slight lingering guilt and shame from the night before stains your thoughts. A ring of liquid left on the surface of a coffee table, encircling the memory of Mingyu’s moaning and the keen sense of desire that burned a pit in your core at the sound.

Jeonghan returns from the kitchen a second later and sits down on the arm of the couch. He clears his throat to speak, more serious than you had seen since graduating university. “Listen, I’m not going to tell you how to live your life,” he begins. You inhale to laugh your disagreement of the statement but he holds up a single hand to silence you so you bite it back just as quickly. “I’m not going to tell you what to do, but I will just give you a warning, if I may” he lets his hand fall back down to his lap, “as your friend. And as someone who has your best interest at heart.” 

“Fine,” you allow, buying into the sincerity, “I’m listening.” 

“I said that I can hook you up with people both serious and not so serious,” he says, pausing to take a deep breath, “Mingyu is not serious.”

The image of the man in question pops up in your mind once more. An observable object–lips locked with the mystery brunette, hands roaming the expanse of her body as they flutter like a pair of dragonflies locked in a mating ritual towards his bedroom. The chorus of “ohs” and “ahs” that chorus in your ears like the audio from the old Italian softcore porn films you used to sneak out of bed to watch in your adolescence. The squeaking of the bed frame, and even the eventual abrupt departure first thing this morning, project themselves across the walls of your brain like a feel of film. All fleeting images and experiences serve as firsthand evidence backing up what Jeonghan is saying to you at this moment in the harsh light of day. 

“If you’re in it for a quick, no strings attached hookup then, well,” he sighs, brushing his bangs out from in front of his eyes, “you’re a grown woman, I trust you can make your own decisions. But I’ve never seen Mingyu with the same girl more than once. So just…be careful. Because if you want something substantial, you would be barking up the wrong tree with him.” 

You nod and the previous image of Mingyu–all roaming hands and bucking hips–dissolves pixel by pixel into the knitted brows of concern and the serious expression his classically handsome face held barely an hour ago. The warmth of his hand as it pressed ever so lightly against the skin of your forehead–an act so painfully tender and familiar it made you yearn at the intimacy of it. While your logical mind does believe what Jeonghan is saying, another part of you (a deeper and much more foolish part) can’t help but feel like there has to be more to Mingyu than the rest of them give him credit for. That maybe there is something to be taken seriously there. 

The thought dissipates into vapour as Vernon strolls down the stairs–bleary eyed and dazed with the lingering sleep still clawing at the corners of his eyes. He nods lazily in silent greeting, clad in tie dye and baggy jeans, and walks past the pair of you and disappears into the kitchen. 

“Just,” Jeonghan hesitates a moment, waiting for the sound of the fridge opening in the next room to disrupt the strained silence that had settled between you, “be careful, okay?” 

“Don’t worry,” you smile, genuinely grateful for the advice and care from your long-time friend, despite the bells of disagreement ringing out inside of you. “I’ll be fine.”

.

.

. 

“Do you think I need a rebound?” The question comes after an hour of banter and conversation over way too expensive cocktails in the dimly lit corner of the bar you used to frequent when you were still going to university with Seulgi. Her insistence that you get out of the apartment and stop stewing in your own thoughts had finally paid off and truthfully the distraction was not entirely unwelcome. But you were still stubbornly refusing to admit that she was right. The status quo of your friendship since the very beginning. 

“Didn’t you say you were swearing off men or something?” Seulgi asks, tapping a manicured fingernail against the side of her nearly empty manhattan. 

“That was before I saw the reality of the men I was swearing off,” you sigh, mourning the loss of your already weak resolve. Solemn regret for the poorly timed declamations you had given voice to in the past. “And the reality is that they're pretty fucking hot.” 

“You mean one of them is pretty fucking hot, right?” she emphasizes, ever observant, and you grimace at her over the lip of your own half-empty glass.  

“One of them looks like a Greek fucking God for no reason,” you grumble, turning to wave the waitress over for another round, “like Adonis or something. It’s not my fault I have functioning eyeballs.” 

“Adonis wasn’t a god, he was the mortal lover of Aphrodite.”

“Well whatever he was, I’m now stuck living in an apartment with him.” The young waitress walks up with an expectant look and Seulgi orders another round of the same while you drain the last of your drink, savouring the bitterness of the gin as it lingers at the tip of your tongue. You watch the waitress as she walks back towards the bar, brunette ponytail swinging behind her like in rhythm with her steps, and wonder vaguely if maybe she’s the girl you saw Mingyu with. 

Seulgi turns back to you with a slight roll of her eyes, “I’m sure it's not that bad. Just ignore him, you’re mostly working or asleep  when you’re not just hanging around bugging me anyway.” 

“Pretty hard to ignore him when he’s so openly hooking up with some random girl in a condo with 4 other people who can clearly hear him.” 

“Well put some earphones in or something, listen to a podcast,” she laughs, shaking her head. You bite your tongue, reluctant to mention the fact that you had willingly listened in as they fucked. That maybe you had enjoyed it a little more than you were letting on. You didn’t need the inevitable teasing that was bound to come if you told her any of that. “Do you remember our one roommate? From second year?” 

“Oh god,” you balk at the memory, “Johnny?” 

“He was so loud,” she grimaces. So many late nights spent huddled together on her bed watching movies, joined in mutual avoidance of the self-proclaimed playboy and his rotating roster of girls. “And then you went and hooked up with him which was just the worst. He was so insufferable after that.” 

“Hey, in my defense I was desperate and not exactly in my right mind,” you bristle at the thought of your pathetic, erstwhile crush. Surely, you had thought in the throes of your youth and naivety, someone who pulled that many girls knows exactly how to make them feel good. Yet by the end of it, as he lay open-mouthed snoring on the bare mattress next to you, you were left with a clear idea of why you never seemed to see the same girl more than once. “Anyway, from the sounds coming out of her, Mingyu seems to actually know what he’s doing in bed.” 

“So you did listen,” she smirks. 

“The walls are thin,” you let the paltry excuse fall from your lips as she tosses her head back in laughter. Gulping down a mouthful of water in a vain attempt to swallow some of the embarrassment boiling like hot lava in your bloodstream. 

“What do you think they were doing?” Seulgi leans forward with a conspiratorial gaze–brown eyes full and bright and filled to the brim with a hint of evil. There have been a few moments throughout your years of friendship where she has fixed you with a look like this, and most of them led to some of the worst decisions either of you have ever made. Breaking into the community swimming pool after dark, stealing the neighbouring houses’ lawn ornaments, making out with dudes that may or may not have been married. Her desire for intrigue terrified and excited you in equal measure. 

“Pretty sure they were fucking,” you respond and she sits back, disappointed at the bland reply. 

“Yeah, I got that part. I mean details. If we’re gossiping, we should do it right.” 

The cacophony of the bar consumes you. Chatter and laughter from nearby tables floods your senses, drowning out the roar of guilt that knocks at the door of your mind as you consider your next words carefully. Whether to completely dive off the deep end and betray your new roommates privacy (in more ways than you already have). If you had been a little more sober and a little less intrigued by the man in your own right, you might have shut the topic of conversation down before it even began. You might have left the apartment for the night and slept on a chair in the lobby and avoided the entire tryst to prevent the memory of his moans from carving themselves into your temporal lobe. 

But you did not and now you are just as invested in the situation, and Seulgi’s complete lack of shame about asking for details further strangled any lingering guilt you had left. “Well,” you start and she leans in closer, eyes alight with anticipation, “they started in the hallway. I thought they were going to have sex right against the wall while I was trapped hiding behind the couch.” 

She laughs, head tossed back in mirth, “bet you would have loved that. Mingyu, bare ass out in front of you,” she jeers and you bristle at the accusation (even if you know she’s right). The waitress returns with your drinks and you mumble a brief thank you to her as she sets the glasses down. Seulgi continues to laugh, pleased with your reaction, “it would have been your wet dream come true.”

“Okay, that’s it. I’m not saying anything else,” you grumble into your fresh drink, wincing at the bite of the liquor. Cocktails were never your thing but Seulgi had offered to pay so who were you to refuse. 

“Aww,” she whines, “fine, fine, I’ll stop teasing you. Please give me the play by play. I am so curious.” She claps her hands together in mock prayer, pleading for your cooperation, and you think she might make an excellent lawyer or serial killer if she weren’t so normal most of the time.

“Fine,” you relent after a beat, already too wrapped up in reliving the night to abandon the story anyway. “Obviously,” you stress, “that didn’t happen. They were making out there for maybe like 5 minutes but it felt like hours. I was so worried she was going to see me but thankfully I managed to stay pretty low.” 

Seulgi takes a sip of her darkly coloured drink, you can tell she wants to interject but she manages to hold true to her promise. 

“So they stumble off to his room,” you continue with a sigh, “and I go to mine, which, mind you, is right next to his. We share a wall.” She winces and you give her a knowing nod, steeling yourself against the all too vivid memory. “I crawl into bed, trying to block out the noise for a while, which at this point isn’t too loud. It’s just like…some muffled talking and moaning and the occasional slap of like…skin on skin. Maybe he spanked her…” you trail off, shaking your head along with the words, fully invested in the theatrics of the storytelling now. “But, through some cruel twist of fate his bed, just like mine, is also right up against our shared wall. So as soon as they really get going, I can feel it.”

“What, like…” she thrusts in her seat, a quizzical slant to her eyebrows, “like shaking?” 

“Yup,” you pop the ‘p’ for emphasis and she lets out a low whistle. 

“For how long?” 

“I don’t know,” you shake your head, “felt like forever. I was just clutching my sheets like it was an earthquake or something.” You do conveniently leave out the heat of desire and curling of toes, but she didn’t need to know that part. 

“Did it start off slow?” she asks, voice conspiratorial. “Fast? Do you think he ate her out first?”

“Seulgi,” you hiss, keeping your voice low. You glance over at the table of college guys next to you but they don't appear to have been listening.

“What, I’m not allowed to ask?” She balks, hand on heart, and appears offended for a moment before the usual mischievousness settles back in and she leans forward with a glint. “Did Wonwoo ever eat you out?”

“We are not discussing the details of my sex life right now.” 

“No of course not,” she rolls her eyes, “we’re just discussing the details of someone else’s.” You grumble at the inability to argue with this statement. “How long has it been since you got laid anyway?” 

“I don’t know,” you sigh, dropping your head to the table and then regretting it immediately when you realise how sticky it is. “Like five months maybe?”

“Five? Didn’t you break up with Wonwoo like…” she fixes her eyes on the ceiling for a brief moment, calculating the time passed in her head before turning back to you with frown lines creased into her forehead, “six weeks ago?”

You shrug, sinking your embarrassment into another sip of alcohol, “so we hadn’t had sex in a while, so what?” 

“Do you think maybe that was a contributing factor in your dissatisfaction with the relationship?” She leans back in her chair, crossing her arms. 

“I don’t need a therapy session, Seulgi.” 

“On the contrary, I think you would benefit greatly from therapy,” she laughs, “but that’s not what this is. You’ve just been sort of distant lately.” You open your mouth to protest but she stops you with a glance, “don’t start, I know we’ve been hanging out, but over the last few months you haven’t been as open about your emotions and stuff. You used to tell me everything, even things I didn’t want or need to hear, but for a while it feels like you’ve just been…hiding. Internalizing.” She leans forward and taps the center of your forehead with one, manicured finger. “Stop that. It’s not good for you to be in your head so much.”

“I hate to say it but, you’re right,” you sigh, begrudgingly agreeing with her observation. The skin where she had poked you tingling in the aftermath of her touch like a beacon of truth.

“I always am,” she nods, “but seriously. We’re friends. I want to hear how you’re feeling. I know I make fun of you a lot, but that’s just ‘cause you’re so easy to make fun of.”

“Hey!” 

She laughs and you’re reminded of why she and Jeonghan always got along so well. “Seriously though,” she says, expression sobering, “maybe you wouldn’t fixate so much of your loneliness and desperation onto random guys if you got out of your head a bit more regularly. Just a thought.” 

“It's not desperation, I just…” you trail off, unsure of where to begin. Unsure even of what your own internal landscape was trying to tell you. You wanted to confide in her, to be more open and transparent, but it was hard to do that when none of you couldn’t even sort out your thoughts and feelings from your anxieties and worries. It was hard to be clear when everything just felt like mud. She waits, expectant, as you sift through the much for some clear strand of thought. “You’re right, about the loneliness anyway, I know you are.” She nods, dark hair spilling over her shoulders. “But it’s not desperation.”

“So then what is it?” she asks and you try to place it. Try to tug on the thought to follow where it was leading you. What was it about Mingyu that made you feel like you were chasing something? Clawing at the walls of some well of yearning like a prisoner of your own desires. What was it about him that was making you want more? More information, more contact, more, more, more. 

“I think,” you start, hesitant to speak the word lest it be wrong. “I think it’s curiosity.”

“About Mingyu?” 

“Yeah, him. And about myself,” you shake your head. Ruminating on your spiraling thoughts was one thing, but vocalising them for someone who knew you oftentimes better than you knew yourself was another thing entirely. Your thoughts held more weight now that someone else was bearing witness to them. They had more consequences now than just 15 minutes of anxiety or a few hours of doom-scrolling.

“What about yourself?” she asks, unraveling the mess as you present it to her. 

“I feel like…I’ve been in this strange place between needing people for everything and also trying my best to not need anyone at all. I can’t do my taxes without help, I can’t change a tire without help, I can’t even move apartments without it! But when it comes to emotions or vulnerability…I would rather just deal with it on my own, you know?” She nods, attention focused completely on you. Despite how long you’ve been friends, the direct attention still flickers a switch of shyness inside of you.  

“That’s what it was like with Wonwoo, too. He was never the most emotionally available person and I think I just got used to dealing with things on my own because of it. I didn’t want to burden him with my thoughts or feelings cause I know I have a lot of them. Don’t get me wrong, though, it wasn’t like he refused to listen or anything I just…he just wasn’t really open with his own feelings or thoughts so I sort of started to feel guilty about dominating those conversations all the time with mine. Like I was using him as some sort of emotional punching bag. And then I just got used to it, and it took so long for me to realise that I needed something more than that…” 

Any hesitation you had felt before dissipates as you talk, little by little. You feel like you’re back in your dorm room together, laying on your floor and just letting yourself pour out every thought, every feeling, every worry you had. Stream of consciousness–your lips to Seulgi’s ears. That open vulnerability you shared before life and work and everything else got in the way and left the door open for inhibition, shame, and guilt to move into the space between.

You feel lighter as you speak, like you had been needing this–craving it. Waiting for her invitation to come to let loose the torrential downpour of your mind to a willing listener. To a friend. 

She was right. She always was.

“So what is it about this Mingyu guy, then? You don’t think he would just be the same?” She asks, shifting the focus, and you purse your lips in concentration. 

“I’m not sure…” you trail off. And you really weren’t sure. Was he just an idle fascination after all? Did you just find him hot and that smoke screen of good looks was blinding you to the fact that he was just some guy like everyone before him? Or was there actually something there, in spite of it all? You mull it over while Seulgi takes a leisurely sip of her drink. “I was talking to Jeonghan the other day, and he said something that sort of made me think–”

“That’s a surprise,” she laughs, unable to resist the opportunity for a jab at your mutual friend. 

“He said ‘Mingyu is not serious’ and I don’t know,” you continue, unabated by her comment, “I get this feeling that that’s not the full truth.”

“What, like psychic intuition?” she laughs and you shake your head. 

“No, no…well, maybe. I don’t know. Obviously I don’t know the guy very well yet, and I have seen him do exactly what Jeonghan was warning me he does but…” you sigh, trying to collect your scattered thoughts of the man that is currently plaguing your mind. “He has also been very thoughtful, and he seems to notice such small details that the others don’t. I don’t know…I just think there might be something more to him than that, you know?”

“And you think you’re going to be the one to discover that side of him?” she asks, eyebrow quirked. Astute as ever. 

“No,” you start, but catch yourself in the lie immediately. “Well, yeah, I guess. I just want to see if my hunch is correct.” 

She fixes you with a withering gaze, dark brown eyes boring into your own for a moment before she laughs again, “Oh I get it now, you want to fix him.”

“I can’t help it, I love a project,” you sigh, resting your cheek in your palm and tracing idle circles against the wood grain of the table top. 

“So take up crocheting or something! Stop throwing yourself at every man who looks like a kicked puppy.” You groan at the accusation but can’t deny the truth in it. You did have a track record. “Look, if you want to do this. Really want to crack that big beefy chest open and see what’s inside, I’m not going to stop you, but I’m warning you now that I do not think this is going to end well.”

“You sound like Jeonghan,” you mumble, eyes closed as you listen to the lecture. 

“Good, at least someone you live with has some brains.” She shakes her head, pausing to hand her card to the waitress as she walks over with the bill for the evening. Silence stretches out for a moment, the din of the bar enclosing in to envelop you in its swell as you wait for the transaction to finish. The waitress returns and Seulgi slips her card back into her wallet before turning back to you, “I’m not saying this to be mean, but I really think you should take some time to be with yourself before you end up repeating the same mistakes you made with Wonwoo.” 

“Harsh,” you mutter, feeling the sting of it spear through your heart and settle there. Slow poison. 

She softens, eyes warming as she slides off her chair. You follow suit and walk with her out into the chill of the night. The bitterness of winter was starting to seep slowly into the air, you can feel it biting at your skin as you step outside with her to wait for the Uber she ordered to pull up.

“I love you and I want what’s best for you, and if you think that there might be something there with this Mingyu guy then I hope you’re right, I really do,” she says, a smile softening her expression. “I just want you to be careful, ok?” 

“Okay,” you sigh, hugging your arms tight against your chest to fight off the wind as it blisters through your thin jacket. “I love you, too. And I will be careful, I promise. I’m not really too keen to repeat my last relationship either…”

“Good,” she nods, eyes roaming to the curb as a slick black sedan pulls up. “I’ll see you soon. Try not to throw yourself too big of a pity party before then.” She waves goodbye as she strides towards the car. You roll your eyes, returning the wave, before starting your brisk walk the few blocks back to the condo.

.

.

.

Time passes slowly in the new stasis of your life. You take the new opportunity in the wake of your hangout to bury yourself in work and get through some projects that had been building up untouched while you were feeling sorry for yourself. You kept up with regular jogs with Seungcheol, largely at his behest, and they were starting to become an enjoyable break in your days. A way to clear your mind and focus your attention on your body. It also did not escape your notice that the route he was taking you on now steered clear of the street where you had seen Wonwoo a few weeks ago. You use your commitment to the new routine as a silent thank you to him for somehow knowing what you needed when you needed it.

Vernon was becoming a favourite of yours as well. A quiet denizen of the condo; he showed up at random hours, taking a seat near you but not too close, reading through scripts or scrolling on his phone in companionable silence as you worked. It was like living with a cat that took care of itself and had an impressive collection of beanies. 

Mingyu you tried to avoid, for the most part. He still plagued your thoughts on a daily basis, but out of respect for your friends’ concerns you wanted to give this budding infatuation time to settle into shape. To give yourself time to try and figure out what your real feelings on the matter were. You tried to find a delicate balance between roommate and acquaintance, figuring out his general schedule and adjusting your own accordingly so that you weren’t caught in any more awkward situations in the middle of the night or without anyone else around. 

All of these measures were helping to make you feel more at home in the condo. Less like an interloper disrupting their days and more like a part of the makeshift family–even if that part for now was cousin, twice-removed. 

As a result you were spending less time doing your work from the cafe and much more of it huddled over your laptop on the coffee table in the living room. Projects were getting done quicker, though it did mean that you were seeing Seulgi less often. 

“Why aren’t you answering my texts?” Seulgi’s face blinks to life on the screen of your phone as you finally accept her FaceTime call. “Are you still moping?” 

“I’m not moping!” you defend, raising the phone to hide the view of the pajamas you’ve been wearing for the past 24 hours as you were locked in a death-match with an upcoming deadline.

“Well how many more projects do you have left to do before we can go out? It’s been two weeks since I saw you now that you’re actually working from home,” she sighs in exasperation. Judging by the smoked out black liner defining her eyes, she was heading out tonight with or without you anyway. “Yerim is in town and she’s been asking about you.” 

“Yerim? Wait, since when? I thought she was still in England?” you straighten up at the mention of your distant friend’s name.

“She’s back for now to get some visa renewal stuff done,” Seulgi answers, “and we’re going out tonight so you should come if you’re not still buried under a mountain of work.”

You glance at the screen of your laptop, folders stacked on your desktop in a messy landscape of the digital mountain you created for yourself. The thought was tempting but you knew Yerim and you knew what a night out with her always entailed. Read: getting black out drunk in a club and stumbling home at 6:00am the next morning. You had made a lot of progress scaling your workload, but you weren't sure that even without work you would have the energy needed for a night out like that. 

The front door clicks open behind you and you spin your head to spout a quick greeting. Mingyu nods a quick hello, arms loaded with bags of groceries, before disappearing into the kitchen. 

“Who was that?” Seulgi asks, noting the interruption in your conversation.

“Mingyu,” you answer, mindlessly pushing yourself off the ground and bringing her with you as you walk into the kitchen behind him in search of a glass of water. He smiles at you as you enter but says nothing as Seulgi’s voice rings out through your phone.

“Ah,” she smirks, “the one with the nipples?” You roll your eyes at the clear attempt to embarrass you but nod—pointedly ignoring the man in question as he sputters next to you at the comment. You fill a glass with water from the filtered jug in the fridge. “So are you coming tonight or should I tell Yerim you’re too depressed?”

You give it a moment of thought. You haven’t seen Yerim since she moved to the UK in the middle of her third year of university, after the rest of you had already graduated. She sent some odd gifts here and there—chocolate, snacks, a figurine of Shakespeare wearing heart print boxers—but communication had dwindled as you all found your footing in your adult lives, far removed from the heady days of hedonistic college life. 

“Well first of all, don’t tell her I’m depressed, ‘cause I’m not,” you emphasise and Seulgi laughs at the bitter defense, “but I don’t think I can make it tonight. We should make plans for dinner or something before she leaves, though. Something a little more lowkey than the club.” 

“Fine, be boring,” she sighs. “By the way, Yerim brought a friend back with her. He’s apparently cute and not completely useless. She thought you might like to meet him, just as a distraction. Or a rebound that’s not going to jeopardize your living situation. He’s also coming tonight” 

You groan, settling down in a kitchen chair—opposite to the one Mingyu had sat down in with his reheated leftovers. He watches you with mild interest out of the corner of his eye while you try to think of a way to convince Seulgi that you don’t need Yerim’s charity date. “I would, but I already have plans tonight,” you lie, hoping she buys it without question.

“Oh?” she asks, eyes narrowed in cautious suspicion. “Do you have other friends?” 

“Very funny,” you roll your eyes, “but no, actually. It’s just with my roommate.”

“Which one?” she probes, digging you deeper into the grave of your own lie.  

“Oh uh–” you stutter but your eyes flicker above the screen of your phone, locking in on Mingyu’s own wide brown gaze. “Mingyu. We’re going to dinner tonight.”

He opens his mouth to speak, clearly confused by being dragged into your mess, but you shake your head lightly—willing him to just roll with it. He clamps his mouth shut and returns to his bowl of stew. 

“Mingyu?” Her surprise is genuine and you can tell she’s starting to believe you. A flicker of concern shines in her eyes. “Is it like…a date?” 

“No, Seulgi,” you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose between your thumb and forefinger. She was edging dangerously close to that  ‘jeopardizing your living situation’ territory on her own. “It’s just dinner. With a roommate.” 

“Okay,” she drawls, “but if you end up against a wall with his face between your thighs—”

“Goodbye, Seulgi,” you end the call with a panicked stab of your finger and lean back in your chair, eyes shut tight against the rising tide of anxiety. You feel lightheaded. Hopefully Mingyu didn’t catch that last part. 

“Did we—” He clears his throat. His voice, hesitant and low, floating in and dispeling your faint hope that he hadn’t been paying attention. “Did we have plans I forgot about?” 

You want to laugh, he sounds so genuinely worried. It forces a bitter bubble of bile to rise up into your throat. “No,” you shake your head, clearing it with a sip of water. “Don’t worry you don’t have to go out to dinner with me, I just really didn’t want to go out tonight. Yerim is sort of wild sometimes and the thought of meeting some stuffy English guy in a club was making me feel ill.” 

“Oh,” he smiles—also hesitant, but you can see a hint of his canines poking out behind his lips. “Well, glad I could be of service, then.” His smile widens and you can’t help but return it with one of your own. 

“You have been most helpful,” you laugh. “Sorry for using you as a scapegoat. Also sorry about the nipples thing, Seulgi has a selective memory.” 

“I don’t mind,” he shakes his head, the flush of warmth in his skin betrays the hint of embarrassment he’s trying to mask. You smile at the grace he’s giving you in what could have been an exceptionally awkward moment (especially after weeks of avoiding being alone with him) and push your chair back–wooden legs sliding against the tile. You stand up, preparing to turn around and hunker back down in front of your laptop screen, but Mingyu calls out your name before you get the chance. 

“Yeah?” you reply, half-turned towards the living room. 

“If you do,” he pauses, clearing his throat. “If you do want to go out to dinner tonight though…I could do that. I would uh…I’d like that.”

Your eyes trail from his still slightly pink face to his nearly empty bowl of leftovers. “But you already ate?” 

“Yeah,” he laughs, hand rubbing the back of his neck. A gesture so familiar to you from spending so much time with Wonwoo, but it looks different on him. Less like an anxious tick and more like a bashful habit. “I can eat again though,” he drops his hand from his neck and pats his stomach twice, “I’m a bottomless pit.” 

You should say no. You know you should say no. You shouldn’t dig yourself any deeper into this hole than you already have. But looking at him now, eyes so wide and genuine—freely offering you this tether of kindness—you can’t seem to bring yourself to summon up the word.

“Okay,” you reply, deadpan. Numbed with the confusion and surprise of this sudden change of plans so easily agreed to. So easily ruining weeks of careful avoidance and the cooling off of the one-sided tension you felt when you were near him. 

“Great,” he grins, white teeth glistening in the bright lights of the kitchen. “I need to grab a shower first and make a quick call, but how about we head out in an hour? What kind of food are you in the mood for? Do you have any favourite spots?” 

“I uh—” you stammer, unsure of the answer to the posed question. “I’m fine with anything. I don’t go out for dinner a lot so I don’t really know that many restaurants…”

“No problem,” he smiles again, standing up and grabbing his bowl. “I know plenty, I’ll bring you to a good one. Promise.” He winks before turning around to rinse out his dish and your heart skips a beat at the expression. One you would so often find lecherous and off-putting seems somehow so endearing coming from him. You scold your brain for the thought before stalking back to your room to change out of your pajamas and attempt to appear somewhat presentable. 

.

.

.

The lights of the city cast their soft glow over the water of the slow moving river. A hypnotizing dance of yellow and gold against the backdrop of the night sky. It lulls your thoughts–quietens them to a dull roar–as you sit next to Mingyu on a park bench.

You had finished dinner a half hour ago; a mouthwatering feast of flavour grilled by the deft hands of your roommate himself. You watched as he took to the task with an almost reverent disposition—ushering the food through the cycle of cooking as you sat across from him, absorbed in the aroma and savouring each morsel he placed in front of you. 

You had worried that he was going to take you to some uptight, fine dining restaurant where each dish was somehow the size of your pinky finger while costing more than you made in a day (Mingyu did have a vibe of luxury about him); but when he opened the door to the small, hole-in-the-wall barbeque joint in a random side-street you felt the tension in your shoulders ease and you were finally able to let yourself relax. 

He ordered–a generous selection of high-quality but reasonably priced beef–and you sat and ate and talked. It was normal and nice and the old wood-planked walls of the restaurant leant the entire dinner an air of casualness that your anxiety-addled brain desperately needed. Just a nice normal dinner with a roommate who you did not have any romantic attraction to at all.

Conversation continued after dinner ended. He was easy to talk to, easy to listen to, and you lost yourself in it, completely forgetting about your previous plan to avoid him, as he paid the bill. You continued to talk as you left the restaurant, stepped back out onto the street, and as you continued to walk together until you saw the Han River stretching out in front of you. 

You hadn’t been paying attention as you walked–just let your feet move under the vague assumption that you were just heading back home–so reaching the river had come as a surprise. Mingyu’s face remained impassive as he led you past the numerous couples dotting the riverbank, each splayed out on grass and blankets, bathed in the soft amber glow of the city. You followed him for a few hundred feet until he stopped at a small hill and sat down on a bench, draping his arm casually over the back as he leaned against the sun-faded wood.

You hesitate a minute before sitting down. The mirage of purely platonic companionship had dissipated step by step as you followed him downstream, watching the way his jacket moved against his torso–loosely fitted but structured enough to hint at the firmness of his shoulders underneath, swelling as his arms swung idly at his sides. Your mind blaring a fire red warning in Jeonghan’s voice: be careful. Mingyu notices you hesitate and offers a warm smile, just touching at the corners of his eyes. He moves over an inch on the bench to give you more space and your heart takes that moment to consider itself some sort of acrobat in your chest. You silence the warning, washing it out with your own self-soothing lies, before taking a seat next to him and focusing on the night skyline. 

Living in the city always felt isolating. Like the loneliness of existence was only amplified by the millions of other lives that played out parallel to your own. Millions of other people with different thoughts, feelings, and experiences existing right next to yours–there, but never touching. Lines crossing and converging but rarely intertwining for longer than a heartbeat. 

Wonwoo had been an anchor in that sea of loneliness. Something solid to hold onto as you were buffeted by the waves of life. Stabile, grounding. You never realised how much you needed that stability until it was no longer there. Until you were cast adrift once more, alone in the deep blue. 

Seulgi was there of course–as well as your other friends and family–but it wasn’t the same. They were islands of reprieve to visit when needed, and to offer the same when they did, but it wasn’t the same as having that one person to tether yourself to. To merge your life with and create a new island on solid foundations. Unshakeable, until it’s not. 

Maybe you were pathetic, relying on a partner for so much support. Needing someone to rescue you from your own life. Maybe you needed to save yourself for once. 

“Do you ever get the feeling like you’re going to end up dying alone?” you ask the question, half expecting it to dissolve into the air in front of you and go completely unanswered. Unsure if you even want an answer or if you just needed to remove the thought from your mind.

Mingyu scoffs, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he glances at you sideways–evaluating. “I don’t think that’s going to be a problem for you.” 

“Oh?” you raise an eyebrow, a twinge of offense scurrying up at the comment. “And what makes you so sure of that?”

“Well, what makes you think you would?” he counters and you let a small laugh slip out at the seriousness of his expression. 

“I don’t know,” you shake your head, dismissing the thought and turning your attention back towards the view. Bitterly regretting altering the mood so seriously. You should have remained flippant, joyous. Unserious. But when did your mouth ever listen to you? “I was just thinking out loud.”

“Oh no you don’t,” he laughs, “you brought it up and now you’re avoiding the question?” You feel the heat of his body warm the air around you as he adjusts on the bench, angling away from the river to better face you and pry the answers free under the weight of his attention.

“You avoided mine!” you bite back in defense, turning in kind to face him, but realising the trap too late as he flashes you a wolfish grin.  

“Ah-ha, so it was a serious question!” he cries, pleased with himself. “Listen if you want my honest answer, I will give it to you but I want an answer in return as well.” 

You hesitate, not for the first time tonight—wavering at the edge of the offer and cursing your propensity for sticking your foot straight into your mouth at the drop of a hat. 

Do you really want to open up to him like this? 

It had been such a nice evening. Good food, good conversation, and a nice walk along the river. It had been a while since you had felt so at ease in someone's company. And yet, despite all of that, you had to go and get lost in your self-sabotaging, meandering thoughts and open your big dumb mouth. Did Mingyu even really want to know? He seemed friendly and open enough but you can’t help but hear Jeonghan’s voice as it bounces off the walls of your mind: ‘Mingyu is not serious’. Did he know what Pandora’s Box he was willingly opening by asking you? Did he care?

You fix your gaze on him, evaluating, searching his eyes for any sign of ambivalence or even trickery. He stares back, waiting patiently for you to mull it over, and you come up with no discernable ulterior motive. Nothing lurking in the clear brown of his eyes other than open curiosity and a slight glimmer of amusement. 

“Ugh, fine,” you relent, falling back against the bench with a huff. You forgot Mingyu’s arm is resting against the back and you feel the pressure of it against you as you settle deeper into the bench. “Why do I think I’m going to die alone…” you repose the question, willfully ignoring the shiver that ripples out from the spot where his arm is pressed against you. You can feel the warmth of it even through your jacket. “Maybe because I’m a bit of an anxious wreck and that can’t be easy to deal with. Or maybe because I’ve managed to fuck up every relationship I’ve ever been in.”

“I don’t think so,” Mingyu replies, assured in his denial of your reasoning. 

You let out a mirthless laugh and glare into the middle distance. “Don’t think so? Don’t think what? That I’m not an anxious wreck? You clearly don’t know me that well.”

“No, I believe that part, though anxiety can be treated to a certain extent. I have this psychologist friend, Minghao, he talks a lot about it. I could get you his number if you want.” he offers and you furrow your brow at the suggestion. 

“You want to set me up with a psychologist?”

He laughs, “not like a date. Like if you wanted to book an appointment to see him about it. You know, like a therapist?” 

“Oh,” you mumble, immediately feeling stupid. “So what did you mean then?”

“Just that it takes two to fuck up a relationship most of the time.  You can’t fuck up something that wasn’t ready to be fucked up, you know? No one is perfect, we all have issues so no relationship is ever perfect and that’s not the fault of just one person.”

“Wow,” you exhale. His words sink in, a stark contrast against the internal monologue of shame and blame you had callously constructed. A differing perspective roaring in to shake your foundations. You try to reckon with it, the thought that it might not be all your fault, and it clamours and clangs against your brain in the worst way. In a way that you know it might be true but you’re not ready to accept it yet. 

“Did I say something wrong?” Mingyu asks, momentarily rendered insecure by your plunge into melancholic silence. 

“No, no,” you assure him, distantly amused by his immediate assumption that it might have been him that did something wrong. “It’s just…” you hesitate, unsure of how to word it. “I wasn’t expecting you to be so insightful.”

He snorts out a laugh, “thanks, I guess. I have my moments.” 

“No, no, I don’t mean that I think you’re like…incapable of insight, just…” you pause, trying to reformulate the thought in a way that doesn’t sound like an insult. “I’m just not used to getting reality checks like that from people I don’t really know that well.”

“Oh, okay,” he laughs again, in relief this time, and you feel the edge of tension you had been holding in your body ebb away. “Well, I mean it though,” he affirms, “I don’t think it means you’re going to die alone.”

“Okay, well,” you sigh, unsure where to follow this new proffered perspective, “thanks, I guess.”

“No problem,” he grins. “Your turn.”

“My turn?” You knit your brows in confusion, eliciting another laugh from your seatmate. “For what?”

“You answered my question, so it’s your turn to ask one,” he explains.

“I didn’t realise we were playing 20 questions,” you tease. The words leave your lips with a little more edge than you had intended and you wince. Why did you always sound so defensive? You glance at Mingyu and feel a slight sense of relief at the fact that he seemed not to have noticed the tone. 

“Well, if you don’t have any questions, I’m fine with being the hot, mysterious one in the house,” he winks and again you find yourself not hating how he looks when he does it. 

Still, you snort derisively in response. If only he knew how deeply not-mysterious he already was to you. “Hardly,” you reply. “Okay, fine. I have a question for you: why does The Notebook make you cry so much?”

Wide-eyed surprise ripples across his face, a tinge of red embarrassment colouring the tips of his ears, “who told you that?” he asks in a nervous half-whisper.

“Jeonghan might have mentioned it when I was moving in…” 

“Traitor,” he seethes, running a hand through his hair as he considers this revelation before answering you. “It’s sad,” he states plainly after a moment’s hesitation and you ‘tsk’, refusing the easy answer. 

“Lots of movies are sad, Mingyu. Why does this one in particular make you cry so much that I was warned never to watch it in the living room?”

He sighs again, heaves his chest in and out like an exasperated dog settling down for bed. You watch as he stares out over the river, wide brown eyes shimmering with the lights of the city, and wait for him to respond. You had never seen Wonwoo cry during a movie. You had barely seen Wonwoo cry at all. He kept his emotions held tight, whether for self-protection or because he really was just that steady you didn’t know, but Mingyu’s upfront expressiveness was a breath of fresh air. Seeing someone so open at every moment with how they were feeling made you feel a little bit less alone with your own rapid shifts in mood. Maybe you weren’t the broken one. 

“Fine,” he relents, “honestly, I know it’s corny. I know it’s a corny movie and it’s lame and dumb that an adult man with a job still bawls like a baby while watching it but I can’t help it. Seeing those two old people dying in bed together after reliving the tale of their love just gets me every single time. It’s a confusing mixture of sadness and hope and I have never been able to get through it without weeping.” 

“Wow,” you remark and he shakes his head. 

“Happy?” he huffs, again with an air of a disgruntled dog and you laugh.

“Very happy, thank you for sharing.” 

“Okay my turn,” he grins, leaning back against the bench once more, the wood groaning slightly under his weight as it shifts. 

“Good luck, movies don’t make me cry often.” 

“Well you’ve gotta have some embarrassing secret. Otherwise we’re on uneven ground, and I don’t like that.” 

“I’ve already told you something embarrassing,” you start to defend yourself but he shakes his head. Resolute. 

“What? About thinking you fuck everything up?” You nod and he laughs, “that’s not embarrassing, that’s normal. Everyone thinks they’re more fucked up than they are.” He shrugs and you again marvel at how casually he accepts the very thing that feels so earth-shaking to you. “Tell me your most embarrassing secret.”

“That’s not a question, it’s a demand.” you point out and he nods, considering the rebuttal. 

“Too broad? Okay, then what’s your favourite song?” 

“How is that supposed to be embarrassing?” you ask, aghast. 

“It’s not, I’m just curious. Not every question needs to be so heavy, you can get to know people through simpler things. Happy things,” he smiles again, coy, and your heart betrays you again with a flutter of wings against your chest. 

“I’m not sure,” you muse. He starts to protest but you cut him off before he can begin, “there are too many songs that I love to feel like I can narrow it down to just one all–time favourite. Too many things to consider.” 

“Like what?” 

“Like, what am I doing when I am listening to it? Is it a song I could listen to anytime, anywhere? Does that make it a favourite or just an easy listen? Is it a song that fills me with a swell of emotions? A favourite from high school that still makes me nostalgic? Or a recent song that I’ve played on repeat too many times to count? You see…too many things to consider.”

“Wow, you’re right,” he laughs again, “you really are an overthinker.” 

“Gee, thanks,” you scoff, rolling your eyes. 

“How about you just make me a playlist with all of the above and we’ll consider it answered?” he winks and you blink back at him, stunned to silence. Wonwoo never really got through the songs you would recommend to him, was Mingyu really going to go to the trouble of listening to an entire playlist? For his roommate? 

“Oh–okay,” you answer, unsure of what else to say. 

Silence descends for a moment, settling comfortably between you, and you glance around in surprise to find that most of the people that had been here when you arrived have since departed. How long had you been sitting on this bench talking?

As if reading your thoughts, Mingyu clears his throat. “It’s getting late,” he feigns a yawn, forearm flexing as he brings his hand up to cover his mouth, “but you have one more question to even it up before we start walking back home.”

You sit still, contemplating. While teasing him had been fun, an overwhelming part of you wants to really get to know him. To know what makes him tick. What thoughts and desires lurk in the depths of those puppy brown eyes. To find out exactly what it was about him that was drawing you in so much despite your (and Seulgi’s and Jeonghan’s) better judgement. 

“What did you want to be when you were a kid?” you ask finally. It feels like a silly question as soon as you ask it but you can’t take it back once it’s been spoken. And you do actually want to know the answer. 

“Is that your final question?” he asks and you hesitate but nod. You’re curious about what kind of kid he was. What his dreams had been before the demands of adulthood had set in. “Alright, but it’s silly,” he warns and you wait silently for his response despite it, “I wanted to own my own bakery.” 

“You wanted to own a bakery?” you parrot the response, surprised by his answer. “Really?” 

“I told you it was silly,” he smiles, voice a slight quiver. You hadn’t expected the answer, true, but it’s the nervousness around it that is really taking you by surprise. Like it’s kid Mingyu answering the question and not the 20-something year old adult you had bought you dinner. 

“No, no, it’s not silly, I just didn’t expect it,” you reassure him and the expression of embarrassment on his face melts back into neutrality. The wave of nerves slipping away into the ether. “Why didn’t you do it?” 

He shrugs, “my parents didn’t think it was a suitable career path for someone like me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You bristle, feeling defensive on behalf of the kid he once was. 

“I never asked for clarification,” he laughs. “Just went to school for business like they suggested. Jokes on them, though, I can still make a mean sourdough.” 

“What can’t you do?” you mumble, intending the comment to be unheard but clearly failing as Mingyu throws his head back with a laugh before getting to his feet. 

“Well, what about you?” he asks as you join him and you both head back down the path towards the main road. “What was your childhood dream?”

“I always wanted to be an artist,” you say, “and I sort of am doing that now just in a more corporate-friendly way. Career was the one aspect of life that I always felt I had a handle on. There was no guesswork. It was just me involved.” 

“Your parents didn’t have any different thoughts as to what they wanted you to do?” he asks, a slight note of surprise colouring his voice. 

“Not really, no,” you shrug, “they were pretty supportive, honestly. I think the only things they really cared about was that I got an education and was able to pay for rent and food.” 

“That’s lucky, it’s nice to have such supportive parents.”

“Yeah, I guess it is,” you nod. It had never been something you had actively thought about, just taken for granted and assumed it was sort of the same for everyone. You make a mental note to call your parents soon and catch up as you and Mingyu leave the park and the river disappears behind you. 

“Would you ever bake something for me?” you ask, matching Mingyu’s stride as you take a turn down the block towards home. 

“That depends,” he replies, amusement clear in his voice.

“On what?” 

“On whether or not you want to hang out again in the future,” he shrugs, feigning nonchalance. You see a hint of blush reddening the tips of his ears again and it makes you wonder. Was it just the slight chill in the air causing it?

“Well, we do live together so I think that’s almost inevitable,” you laugh, trying to brush the niggling feeling off with an assurance that you did not feel. 

“True,” he concedes, “then I guess I will. Are you more of a sweet or savory person?” 

“That depends,” you reply, a small grin turning up the corners of your lips. 

“Overthinking pastries now too?” 

“No,” you laugh, all lingering feelings of defensiveness gone from you. “It depends on what you’re better at making.” 

“Oh, I’m good at it all,” he replies, voice smooth–silk slipping over mahogany–as he holds open the door to the condo complex for you. You glance at him, eyes meeting his in the dim light of the lobby, and study him for a moment. He’s smiling, cool and casual, but there’s a seriousness hiding in the depths of his expression that you can’t quite unravel. It draws you in, curiouser and curiouser, until you find yourself face to face with a crossroads. Two paths diverge in the yellow woods of your mind and the only thing that remains is to choose.  

“Then I’ll take it all,” you reply after a breath, thoughts slipping into place. Threshold crossed, decision made. You step into the lobby and head towards the elevator leaving Mingyu to trail behind. 

.

.

.

The condo is blessedly quiet when you arrive upstairs; everyone else scattered throughout the city with Friday night plans. The absence of Jeonghan in particular is a relief, you knew that no matter what the context was, if he saw you return with Mingyu at this time of night you would be primed for some form of lecture or another. Whether verbal or simply that knowing stare he likes to give you when he thinks you’re being stupid.

That silent cloud of judgement would have been especially intrusive tonight as you step in through the front door barely clinging onto the tenuous air of bravado you had conjured up in the lobby downstairs. It would have shaken your resolve to follow this thought of intrigue towards Mingyu and thrust you right back into your torrential thoughts once more, spinning haphazardly between mourning over what was lost and what might not ever be.  

Instead you stand with shaky confidence and a pounding in your chest as you bid Mingyu goodnight, savouring that look of intrigue you’re sure is mirrored in his own expression as you close your bedroom door for the night and bar any doubt from creeping in behind you. 

You listen through the walls as his own door clicks shut before rummaging through the unpacked duffel bag in the corner of your room. You dig through unsorted paperwork, unopened mail, random knick knacks you had found no home for yet until your fingers grasp the object you were seeking.

Sleek, black silicone emerges from the bag and you glance behind you as if Mingyu might be standing there, ready to chastise you for your impure thoughts. 

You stand up, hesitating, evaluating the vibrator as it sits like a brick in your palm. You had only used it once, years ago, after buying it at a convention with Seulgi before it ended up buried deep in the recesses of your drawer. At the time your sex life had been consistent and satisfying–it was early days for you and Wonwoo and the excitement and novelty of having each other at your fingertips for the whims of the moment had kept you too busy to even remember that you had the toy stored away in the first place. It wasn’t until you were packing to move out that you rediscovered it.

You hesitate for a second before thinking ‘fuck it, I paid like $200 for this, I’m gonna get some use out of it’ and slipping out of your clothes and into your bed. 

You try to set the mood in your mind, fingers swirling idly over your bare skin as you flip through mental images of celebrities, movie scenes, fantasies that you used to use to get in the mood. Anything to deepen that pressure that burned quietly inside of you. None of your old tricks produce results and you sigh, ready to give up on the activity completely, before you feel the distinct thud of Mingyu’s headboard against the wall. 

You imagine Mingyu: what is he doing? Maybe sitting on the edge of his bed, scrolling through Instagram, or maybe he’s under his covers too. Maybe he’s having the same thoughts as you? 

You follow this thought where it takes you, back to that night the other week. Back to the low sound of his moaning carried through the drywall and plaster, the thudding of his headboard against your wall, back to that yawning pit in your stomach that felt like it might swallow you whole at any second. Your hand traces the path of the scene playing out in your mind, blazing a trail down your chest, stomach, and finally to the aching space between your thighs. 

You recall the weight of Mingyu’s arm pressed against your back on the park bench–steady and solid. The sound of his voice and laughter muffling your gasp of surprise as you flick the vibrator on and jump at the sudden noise filling your room. 

You flick it back off immediately, worrying that the distinctive buzzing sound would carry itself through the cover of your blankets and body and make it through the proven-thin walls towards Mingyu’s ears. He would know for sure you were in here thinking about him, fantasizing about his lips on your neck. The thought of discovery adds a confusing stab of guilt to the knotting in your guts but you do your best to squash it as it pops up. What exactly were you doing wrong? You were tired of denying yourself pleasure out of fear of other people’s judgements or shame. You flick the vibrator back on, this time prepared for the noise, and dig the object deeper between your thighs. 

Maybe part of you wants him to hear you–wants him to know what you were doing alone in the dark in the bedroom next to him. Maybe, in this alternative timeline, he knocks softly on your door. His brown eyes rake over your naked body, bared to him like a gift prepared just for him. His sweatpants strain with the pressure of his bulge as his blood travels lower, and lower. Filling him with the desire as it fills you now. He steps forward, wavering at the threshold of your bed and asks, voice so low it plucks at the strings of your core, to join you. To help you release this coil of tension that had made its home inside of you, growing bigger and hungrier every single day since running into him half-naked in the kitchen that first night. Maybe he’s been running through this same scenario every night before bed, hand gripping his cock as it pulses in his hand, sweat beading his brow. 

Alternative timeline or not, the thought itself is all that you need to push you over the edge as you move the vibrator against your clit, finding the right rhythm of pressure, the right balance of relief, to feed the beast of desire crying open-mouthed inside of you. To have your legs shaking and your core pulsing with waves of pleasure no longer denied. You cry out, muffling the sound with the back of your free hand, and for the first time in years it isn't Wonwoo's face clear in your mind as you reach your climax.

© 2024, neoneun-au. all rights reserved.

―AUTHOR’S NOTE: i cant link them here, but please find the series masterlist and other chapters on my blog. i would love to know your thoughts on the story so far !

[suzukiblu]

WIP excerpt for yesdangerpls; the last son of Krypton meets Hypertime Kon. ( + non-chrono link for mobile users )

“A version of you was conquering alternate realities,” Bruce says, still neutral. 

“Uh,” Kon says, looking embarrassed. “Kinda, yeah? Kinda definitely, actually. I mean–dude had some issues. His home reality wasn’t really all that clone-friendly, and shit kinda went to shit there, and then he just decided ‘actually killing inconvenient people is ethically okay if I just make clones out of their dead bodies and give those clones their memories after’, so, uh . . . issues, like I said. Serious ones.” 

“And you don’t think that’s ethical?” Bruce says, which is an obvious test. Kon glowers at him as Clark resists the urge to sigh at Bruce. The man’s as paranoid as ever, no surprise. It’s . . . understandable, admittedly, but not exactly fair in this situation. 

“Clones are their own people,” Kon says, setting his jaw stubbornly. “No matter whose memories you stick in our heads.” 

“That’s a school of thought,” Bruce says neutrally. Kon scowls, then pointedly lifts his lassoed wrist. 

“You’re an asshole,” he says emphatically. Clark has to muffle a snort of laughter behind his hand; Diana does the same. Bruce looks sour. Clark knows he doesn’t think they’re taking this seriously enough, but he just can’t look at this kid and see a threat. 

Of course, that’s part of why Bruce doesn’t think they’re taking this seriously enough. 

“And you’re asking for a lot of trust, for someone who’s reportedly an interdimensional conqueror in at least one reality,” Bruce says. “Why should we believe this version of you is any different from Black Zero?” 

“For the record, it was a version of me that stopped him, too,” Kon says, still scowling at him. “Like, a whole bunch of versions of me. And we didn’t all survive the experience. So I dunno, democratically speaking I think I’m mostly not a shithead.” 

“And you don’t know how to return to your home reality?” Diana asks. Kon grimaces, then shakes his head. 

“No idea,” he says. “I only got out into Hypertime to begin with because another Superboy showed up in our Watchtower with a hyperjacket keyed to his DNA and, uh . . . crash-landed and died right in the middle of a JLA meeting, actually. He was–injured, when he made the jump. Didn’t survive it. He was with the resistance. Was trying to warn our reality that Black Zero was coming, but . . .” 

Clark feels immediately nauseous at that thought; wonders how traumatic and horrible it was for his alternate version to watch that happen and not be able to save that version of Kon. Wonders if that Kon’s version of him even knows what happened to him. If . . . 

He tries not to think about it. It’s not something he can do anything about. 

It’s definitely motivating him to get this Kon home all the quicker, though. His other self must be losing his mind right now. 

“Satisfied?” he asks Bruce, raising an eyebrow at him again. He’d be amused, a little, if he weren’t still thinking about what had happened to that other version of Kon: about a kid that young dying far from home trying to do the right thing, surrounded by a roomful of heroes who couldn’t save him. 

“No,” Bruce says. 

“Batman, there are multiple realities in which all of us are supervillains,” Diana says wryly, unlooping her lasso from Kon’s wrist and winding it up again. “We can hardly blame Kon-El for the crimes of a single version of himself.” 

Bruce has a look on his face that makes it very clear that he does, in fact, think they can do that. Bruce also thinks that about them, though, himself included, so Clark isn’t going to give that concern particularly heavy weight right now.

[eightballspins]

SUMMER

pairings : jongseob (p1h) x male reader

warnings : none, but like really pathetic pining and oblivious men not knowing how to act around their crushes (shota is sick and tired of yall)

rating : fluff :D

requested? : yesyesyes!!! thank u 🩵 anon, i don't think you were expecting a full fledged fanfic as a response to your request LMAO so do send in another one if you want a more simple headcanon version of this, i just couldnt help but go a lil crazy LMAO

a/n : strangers to friends to lovers, one of my favorite tropes. jongseob is definitely giving loser pining nerd in this one, but its ok bc hes so cute + this wasn't meant to be this long, but i couldnt help but go a little crazy + i highly suggest listening to the song while reading because it really sets the mood imo (summer by brockhampton)+ i had that ^ seob in mind while writing this btw hes just so heart eyes emoji in that video and i think light brown rlly suits him and gives off the strongest boyfriend vibes

wc : 6.5k+

"in the heat of the summer. yeah, yeah, oh, you know that you should be my boy. oh yes, you know. in the heat of the summer, you're so different from the rest."

jongseob didn’t expect himself to be the type to develop a crush on a first meeting, or more like first glance. but here he was: purposely keeping his head down to not draw too much attention to himself as you walked by him. he was looking down at his phone, swiping in random directions, even looking at the weather app and pretending as if that were interesting. it was really pathetic how shy he became whenever you were near, but that’s just you made him react — so it really wasn’t his fault…

“you’re kim jongseob, right?”

he flinched at your voice, not expecting to hear it call his name out of nowhere. locking his phone, and hoping you didn’t see him stare at the weather for the week, he looked up at you and nodded his head. his mouth went dry and he cleared his throat as an effort to make sure his voice didn’t crack when he spoke to you.

“the teacher told me to find you and let you know i’ll be the one tutoring you for math,” you take the empty seat next to him, pulling out your phone and holding it out to him, “we should exchange contact information so we can talk about when to meet up and what works best for our schedules,”

okay, hold on. everything was moving wayyyy too fast and jongseob still hasn’t blinked once since you started talking to him. it was as if his consciousness left his body. he forced himself to blink and then finally opened his mouth to talk. but you had cut him off, by accident.

“sorry, my name is [name], it’s nice to meet you,”

instinctively, he had bowed his head down and you mimicked the action.

“nice to meet you, i’m jongseob,”

”i know,” a kind smile on your lips almost sent him into a hyperventilating state.

your first meeting with each other ended with him saving your contact in his phone and vice versa, then you departing soon after as you had to go to your own class. that day, shota was wondering why jongseob was so latched onto his phone and staring at it with a blank look on his face.

— in the beginning phases of his crush, jongseob acts really, really reserved and shy. it’s almost as if he doesn’t even want to associate with you with how standoffish he is, but it’s just because he’s eternally scared of embarrassing himself in front of you. in the beginning, he tried brushing off how serious his crush was, thinking it was going to be passing. but when he realized that every night before bed he’d think of you, he knew he was in too deep at that point. it makes him so frustrated that he lets his mind be so filled of you and only you, especially because before you were assigned as his tutor, you’d never even properly spoken to one another. but hopefully now that you two will be forced to talk to one another, jongseob’s skittish and introverted behavior could change a little more…hopefully.

the two of you were sitting in the library, snacks and drinks surrounding you as the two of you were staring at the textbook on the table.

“so, what do you think you struggle with the most?” you kindly asked, pulling out your notebook and pencils from your bag and preparing to start. jongseob blinked at the question, feeling himself blush as he thought of how he struggled with practically everything related to math.

“i think…just everything,” he says honestly, a bashful and embarrassed look on his face. you almost cooed at the cute expression, but stopped yourself.

you didn’t expect jongseob to be so cute. when you had seen him in person the first time, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t think he wasn’t at all attractive. he had soft features and a cute smile, which was enough to make you interested in him. but seeing his equally soft personality was enough to solidify that initial interest.

lucky you for having the teacher pair the two of you up.

“well, to be honest, i struggled a lot too when i was taking his class before,” you confessed honestly, hoping your words would comfort him a little, “but, it’s mainly the way he teaches it that makes it so confusing. so, i think, i can try re-explaining everything to you in a more simple way and hopefully it works that way? does that sound good to you?”

jongseob quickly nods, finding the tone and sound of your voice a comfort and especially persuasive. you could tell him to jump up on the table and do something incredibly embarrassing and he’d probably do it.

yeah, he was in too deep.

“then, let’s start! i’ll set an alarm for a break in twenty minutes?” he nods his head in understanding, feeling unreasonably determined to not let you and your efforts in teaching him go to waste. so he leans forward, mechanical pencil ready in hand and his notebook open to the first blank page.

as you’re explaining things to him, jongseob already feels as if he’s learning more from you in the first ten minutes than he did from his teacher the past couple of weeks. also, he feels himself growing more comfortable, which is a relief. because before he felt as if his cheeks were turning bright red anytime you looked at him, now it was just the tips of his ears (he hopes…). he was able to properly speak to you and make eye contact without completely stuttering through his sentences.

after the entire two hour session, you walked together to the bus stop. jongseob was only accompanying you since he could easily walk home, but he wasn’t about to make you wait alone. plus, he finally felt himself growing comfortable enough and he didn’t want to leave so soon (even if you had just spent the past two hours together).

“so, what do you like to do outside of school?” you ask, sipping your favorite boxed juice as you waited together.

“music,” he answers quickly, correcting himself soon after with, “i like listening to and writing music,”

you blinked in surprise, not taking him as the type and an impressed look was on your face, “wow, that’s really cool. i wish i had a talent like that. do you share your music on any platforms?” you pulled out your phone, as if you were ready for him to show you, but he shakes his head.

“no, just keep them on my computer…i don’t think i want them out, it’s kind of embarrassing,” he scratches the back of his head, cursing the red blush that was definitely rising up his neck.

”i don’t think it is,” you deny, pouting at his self-deprecation, “confidence is the key, jongseob!” you encourage, hitting his shoulder lightly, “if you ever feel comfortable enough, i’d love to hear it some day,”

he blinks at the offer, wondering how to respond to such an invitation. sharing his music with someone is something he deems really intimate, especially since it’s you — the boy he has a raging crush on. but he doesn’t have to think of his response much longer as your bus pulls up to the stop.

“it was nice getting to know you better, jongseob! i look forward to our next meeting,” you smile, bow your head to him, and then board your bus not looking back at him.

he watches the bus leave, his knees going wobbly as he collapses into a crouching position with his head in his hands.

“i’m screwed,” he mutters to himself, shooting up in a second’s notice and running his hand through his hair, “he’s so annoying, i’m really screwed,” he calls you annoying only because he knows that on his walk home and all the moments he spends without seeing you, he’ll just be thinking about you.

he’s in too deep, there’s no way he’ll ever recover from this crush.

— after the first couple of meetings, you and jongseob become much more acquainted than a simple “tutor” and “tutee.” you became close friends, so close that you met shota and now often sit with them during lunch breaks or in any free time. whenever there was an open period, you’d stop by jongseob’s classroom and take a seat next to him and fill the rest of your time together with little chats. shota teases him endlessly on how lovesick he has gotten over the past couple of weeks, but jongseob lets it slide — as long as you’re nowhere near to hear it. shota has known of jongseob’s crush on you for the longest time and deep down he’s genuinely happy for his friend that he was making some progress. before, he’d have to bear with watching jongseob longingly stare at you from afar, so seeing the state you and jongseob were in was incredibly comforting to know his best friend was making some sort of progress,

“jongseobie!” your excited voice makes him look up from his phone and instantly smile. the nickname you had coined for him after a couple of tutoring session makes his heart race so very fast. he loves how it sounds, how you comfortably call him, especially when it’s in that excited tone you just used a second ago. “guess what i got!”

“what?” he says in an instant, looking at you with curiosity as you come to a halt in front of him.

“you’re supposed to guess,” you tease, rolling your eyes at him. you step closer as you wait for his response, but after he stays silent as he tries thinking of what it could be, you could barely hold it in anymore. “i got us tickets to that show you wanted to see!”

from behind your back, you pull out two stubs of paper and jongseob feels his jaw drop. he had mentioned it to you in passing, when you were talking about the music you each liked, one of his favorite, lesser known, artists was going to be playing somewhat nearby. he planned on buying the tickets, but the fact you had remembered and done it yourself was enough to get blood rushing to his cheeks.

“you- how- are you serious?” he asks, looking at the paper tickets as if they were god send.

you nod with a proud smile, showing them off, “i got them as a gift because you’ve been doing really well lately — your teacher even pulled me aside earlier this week to compliment me for how well the lessons have been doing, but it’s really been all you. you’re really smart, and a quick learner, jongseob. so i wanted to appreciate your hard efforts with these!” he blushes at your compliment, too flustered to notice that you were also blushing at how obviously you were gassing him up.

“you bought two?” he asks, wondering if this was what he thought it was. maybe you took the initiative and…

“oh, if you wanted to bring a friend, maybe shota. i don’t think concerts are that fun to go to alone, so i wanted to make sure you could bring someone,” you explain, handing the tickets to him.

before he even stops to think, he’s pushing one back into your hands and saying, “come with me, i wanna go with you.” it sounds more definitive than inviting, but you don’t seem to mind as a wide grin stretches across your face.

“really? you want me to come?”

“of course, i really want you to come with me,” he says with utmost certainty, “the only reason i’m doing well is because of you, i want us to go together,”

you smile and accept the ticket, stepping forward to loop your arm with his, “what should we wear then? tell me, what’s the artist’s vibe,”

jongseob, trying not to hyperfocus on the close contact, replies with a shaky voice, “i’m sure you’d look cool in anything,” he compliments, “don’t think too much about it!”

“but i wanna fit in with the crowd! hey, recommend me some songs so i can understand them more,” you insist, making jongseob pull out his phone to scroll through his playlist. you watch eager, leaning against his shoulder and at his phone screen as he searches. he tries to ignore how close you are and hopes you don’t see the way his hand shakes from the nerves.

what he doesn’t know is that you’re also sneaking looks at him with a smile on your face, basking in the affection you had managed to steal from him. it was flattering to know that jongseob wanted you to come as his “plus one”, but you tried not thinking too deep into it…trying to stop yourself from thinking it was anything like a date. because it wasn’t.

even if you both wished it was.

“here, i’ll send you my playlist,” he says, showing you his spotify on the screen and waiting for your approval. when you hum in response, he copies the link and goes to your messages.

“wait, what’s my contact name on your phone? have you changed it since i put it in?” you ask curiously, seeing something added to the end of your name, like an emoji, that definitely wasn’t there before.

jongseob blinks in stupor before realizing what you were referring to. he hurriedly locks his phone and turns it face down to hide it from you, laughing to play it off.

“what? why? why? what’s my name on your phone?” you tease, trying to reach for it, despite not knowing if he had a passcode or not.

“it’s nothing, it’s nothing,” he says, trying to distract you from that topic of conversation and goes back to the artist you two were going to see, “just make sure you listen to the playlist-”

“but i want to know what my contact is on your phone!” you cut him, laughing as you begin play fighting for the device.

“well, your bus is here so you won’t get to know, sorry,” he says, unfortunately speaking the truth as the familiar bus pulled up to the curb.

“i won’t forget this, jongseobie,” you say in a mock threatening voice, squinting your eyes at him, “you’re gonna show me it tomorrow!!”

“bye, bye, [name]!” he calls out, happily waving to you as the bus takes off in the opposite direction of the school.

he looks down at his phone and unlocking it to show the link of his spotify playlist that was sitting in the textbox, waiting to be sent. he looks up at the top of his screen, smiling softly at the contact name and photo he had saved for you. it was a selfie you had taken on his phone during one of your recent study sessions, showing an incredibly tired 0.5 angle of you, with his head resting on the table being seen in the background. when he was scrolling through his camera roll, he had seen it and immediately made it your profile picture. it was cute to imagine you sneakily taking his phone while he was dozed off, snapping the picture, then setting it back to its original spot.

the words underneath your photo reading as “handsome tutor 𖹭.”

jongseob would have collapsed in embarrassment if you had seen that. he sighed, hit send on the text, and locked his phone to put away in his pocket. he walked home with a smile on his face, thinking about you and the concert you two were going to together.

—

“so it’s a date?” shota asks him, chilling in his seat as jongseob explains to him everything that had went down.

“it’s not a date, shh,” jongseob says, putting his finger to his lips and glaring at shota for saying such a thing so loud.

“it sounds like a date, jongseob,” shota deadpans, not looking impressed, “you two need to get it together, the tension between you two is so suffocating,” the man shivers as if to physically show how unbearable the “tension” was, but jongseob doesn’t pay that any mind.

“it’s not a date because if it were, he would’ve said it was, but it’s not because he didn’t say that,” jongseob quickly explains, wanting to put that discussion to rest.

“okay, then it isn’t a date,” shota forfeits, rolling his eyes at his best friend’s antics.

“yeah, it isn’t…” the man confirms once more, “besides, i don’t even know if he even likes men — have we ever thought about that? he probably just thinks we are good friends, which i can settle for and is the most realistic thing, but still i wish i knew for sure! it kind of sucks not knowing if i even had a chance, y’know?”

“had a chance with who?”

jongseob freezes and shota sputters out a suffocated laugh at the timing.

you were standing right behind him and he didn’t know for how long you were, but he does wish that the ground would swallow him up whole right now.

“earth to jongseobie? hello?” you wave your hand in front of his frozen face, laughing slightly at his expression, “what’s up with him, shota?”

“i don’t know, he’s a weird guy,” the man answers with a shrug, making you laugh at the irony before taking a seat next to him.

“well, anyway! i listened to the playlist you sent me, let me show you some outfit ideas i have for us,”

“us?” jongseob echoes, wondering if he heard right.

”yeah, if we’re going together we might as well should match, right?”

shota looks at the two of you, completely worn out from how oblivious jongseob was and how shamelessly forward you were (whether you were aware of it or not was unknown to shota).

“right, right,” jongseob agrees, leaning in towards you and your phone screen.

“i think you have good style to begin with, so i tried finding something that would suit it. you’re handsome anyway, so anything you wear you’ll be able to pull off,” you ruffle his hair as you compliment him, successfully making him go red in the face.

shota once again wishes his best friend would open his eyes and end this tantalizing process already, hoping you two would just date already.

—

it was the night of the show and you and jongseob agreed to meet at a halfway point. the venue was a little far away, but nothing a pair of headphone and the bus couldn’t handle. you were currently binge listening to the playlist jongseob had sent you — you had been since he’s sent it to you — and were happily humming along to the song playing. if it weren’t for jongseob, you probably would’ve never discovered this artist, who actually suited your tastes a lot.

at the designated stop, you kept an eye out for him, grinning immediately when you locked eyes with him. his usually straight hair was done to be slightly wavy and that subtle change made your eyes falter and heart skip a couple beats. he really was so handsome. his eyes were wide, looking for you and when he finally caught sight of you, an excited smile broke out onto his face and it was so wide his eyes turned into crescents.

he walked over to you, taking the seat beside you and tried to control his excitement.

”how are you?” he asked first, trying to not stare too hard at your outfit and how good you looked. he was slightly envious, how you looked so good in everything you wore and how you naturally pulled off everything you wore. he also took note of how you both were wearing the same color-toned clothes, subtly matching. that only made him smile even wider.

“i’m excited, how about you?” you’re quick to throw the question back at him, smiling so wide it’s infectious.

“i’m really excited, i’m really happy we’re going together,” he says, nodding his head several times as he takes in this reality. if anyone had told him a couple months that he was going to one of his favorite artist’s concert with you of all people, he would’ve laughed in their face. this was all almost completely unbelievable.

“you brought your camera?” you said, motioning to the film camera that was strapped around his body.

“oh, yeah,” he takes it up into his hands, bringing the viewfinder up to his eyes and quickly snapping a photo of you. obviously, after the act was already done, you began complaining about how you weren’t ready.

“retake it, retake it,” you egged on, pushing him slightly back so it wasn’t so close to your face. he obeyed, leaning backwards and bringing his camera back up to his eye.

you smiled, holding the ticket up to your face and proudly showing it off. he smiled softly at how genuinely excited you looked, bringing the camera down from his face after he got the shot.

“your turn,” you say, gently taking the camera from his hands and bringing it up to your eye. “wait, how does this work?”

he chuckles at your question, moving close to show you how it works, nimble fingers pointing at the different parts of the camera, “here, scroll it to the right,” he says, watching you carefully, “and then when it stops, you can take the picture. just press this one,”

you get the gist, afterwards, looking up from the components of the camera and locking eyes with jongseob. you both didn’t realize how close he was until you looked up, making time freeze for a moment as you just sat there and stared at each other.

his brown bangs were slightly covering his eyes, but you were still able to see him so clearly. he really was so breathtaking…

“ready?” you asked after a couple seconds of silence, making him clear his throat and nod.

you pressed your back against the window of the bus as he leaned a little into the aisle so that he was properly spaced out in the shot. he held up his own ticket, pursuing his lips as he slightly smiled at the camera. the corners of your lips quirked up at his cute expression, taking the picture swiftly.

“it sucks we don’t see them right away though,” you comment, handing the film camera back to him.

“we can still take pictures on our phones,” he comforts, pulling out his own and immediately holding it up for a selfie. smiling at the opportunity, you lean close to his person, practically cuddled up to his side.

and even after reaching levels of comfortability with you that he thought was impossible, being physically close to you still flustered him. he liked it though, obviously. he liked you, so any affection you showed him was welcome in his eyes. which is exactly why he didn’t push you away or shift his torso from you. instead he leaned into your side as well, positioning the camera at multiple different angles for you two.

then you took out your own phone, taking pictures for your own camera roll. the last one you took was a silly 0.5 one that the both of you laughed at after seeing the finished product.

“these are cute,” you comment, scrolling through your own, “send me the ones on your phone!”

“okay, okay,” he complies, going to share them straight from his camera roll and sending them to you a couple seconds later. he doesn’t realize it, but his screen is clearly visible to you, meaning you were finally able to see what the contact name he had for you was.

you blushed heavily seeing it, forcing your head to look away to not be caught, trying to force the smile on your face down. instead, you took a comfortable resting spot on his shoulder, feeling a surge of confidence in your actions due to the revealed contact name.

jongseob’s shoulder stiffened at the bold action, but he tried to calm himself down to not ruin the moment. he looked anywhere else but you, not wanting to be caught blushing a deep red if you were to look at him. he didn’t realize you snuck one more photo in, smiling like a fool at your camera as your head rested on his shoulder.

after about a thirty minute bus ride, you finally were at the stop closest to the venue. you pulled the wired headphones from your ear, jongseob passing you the other pair, and both of you hopped off of the bus to walk to the venue.

you both weren’t particularly keen on getting there super early to be close, so the line wasn’t as long as you thought it would’ve been.

“wait, go ahead,” he says, motioning for you to keep walking without him. and you were going to question why, but then saw that he had his camera in his hand and wanted a shot of you walking to the venue, which had the name of the artist plastered in shining lights above the main entrance way.

he joined you in a couple of seconds, jogging up to your side and excitedly walking up to security to be let in.

you and jongseob were near the back of the pit, but since it was a small place, the view you had of the stage wasn’t that bad.

“this is so cool,” you say, stars in your eyes as you take in the environment. jongseob hums beside you, making sure to stick close to you to not lose you in the crowd. his arm hung loosely off of your shoulder, which made you more inclined to slot yourself into his side.

maybe it was the darker atmosphere and the fact you were in a bigger crowd now, where it was easy to hide away, but the both of you had gotten a boost of confidence in lingering touches.

jongseob didn’t think twice in holding you close to him and you weren’t as secretive in stealing glances his way. he didn’t feel as flustered and embarrassed as he usually did, which made him not think twice in committing to being affectionate with you.

he wishes he was like this all the time. capable of holding eye contact with you without looking away after the first five seconds. capable of looking at your eyes then your lips without feeling himself go red in the face immediately. a couple months deep into this crush of his and sometimes he was still acting like he hasn’t been seeing you everyday, as if he was still just admiring you from afar.

meanwhile, you were loving every second of this. seeing jongseob not hesitate in keeping you close and stare at you, it was infectious.

before you knew it, the main act had came onto the stage and now all of your attention was on them. jongseob’s arm left your shoulder to take a couple of pictures with both his phone and film camera, but he still made sure to be close.

the two of you were singing to your hearts’ content, sometimes breaking out into laughter at how horrid your voices sounded. but you were smiling and laughing together and that was all that mattered. the show went on faster than you both had realized and the singer was now announcing that it would be their final song of the night.

when the first chords played throughout the venue, you instinctively held onto jongseob’s hand and squeezed tight because it was the song you were hoping they were going to play. excitedly you looked at him to see his reaction, wondering if he was waiting for this song as well, but when you turned to him, he was already looking at you.

and you were happy you didn’t have the strength to look away because staring into his eyes as the song played in the background felt as if you were in the middle of a romance movie scene. one of those god awful cheesy scenes where the two love interests have the camera spin around them as they slowly lean in to kiss each other, or some other form of major affection. you almost laughed out loud at the idea of that being you and jongseob. not because it was actually humorous, but because it was so outlandish.

there was no way jongseob liked you back like you liked him.

that contact name on his phone was probably just a coincidence…

you swallowed the lump in your throat and forced yourself to look away from his dark eyes, that were pleadingly looking at you, begging for you to do something. the moment your head turned in the other direction, though, jongseob felt a wave of frustration and immense emotion crash down on him.

it wasn’t fair. he wants to kiss you, tell you how badly he’s fallen in love with you. he doesn’t want to keep sneaking glances at you when all he wants to do is stare at you all day long. and with the way the lights are reflecting on you, the fucking song playing in the background, there’s no reasonable way for jongseob to hold himself back.

he’s so frustrated at himself for harboring such strong emotions for you, but he wouldn’t want it any other way.

so he finally grows the courage to reach out and gently cup your face and force you to look back at him. he doesn’t give himself, or you, a second to properly react as he leans forward and smashes his lips against yours. it’s dramatic, desperate, and borderline aggressive, but it’s what he’s feeling — all those times he’s had to hold himself back from making you his. it was all released in this one kiss.

it took a couple of seconds to realize what was happening. and when you did, you could feel him beginning to pull away. squeezing your eyes shut to really bask in the moment, you brought your hand up to the back of his neck and held him in place, finally kissing him back.

the hand that was once resting on your cheek had now fallen to your waist, bringing you in closer to his person. his fingers were squeezing you so tight, as if he were afraid you’d slip away if his grip loosened even the tiniest bit. you were moving in sync with one another, hungry for that affection you were both restraining from each other before. your arms looped around his neck and you could feel him smile into the kiss at the action. it was infectious because now you were two smiling, kissing fools.

after pulling away, the world around you both was so fuzzy, the song playing being the only thing that you could sense as loud and clear. the both of you were panting from such an intense kiss. his arms were wrapped around your lower half while yours lazily hung off of his shoulders.

“[name], i really, really like you,” he says breathless, “even before you spoke to me, i liked you,” it was shocking to learn how long he had been harboring this crush on you, but you didn’t stop him from going on, “i’ve wanted to kiss you like that for so long,”

a weak bout of laughter was shared between you two and jongseob had to force himself to continue on, “please, give me a chance and be my boyfriend, please,”

you played with the hair at the base of his neck, making him shiver at the sensation while you grinned at him.

“you don’t need to beg for it. i’m already yours, jongseob,” you crash into his chest and he breathes a heavy sigh of relief, holding you tight. the two of you stand like that, rocking back and forth and just taking in the final song — that was now apart of one of your fondest memories.

after it was finished, you both pulled away and shared one more long kiss. it wasn’t as desperate as the first, but you could still feel that longing from him as he eagerly deepened it. the only reason why you two had to pull away was because the rest of the crowd was beginning to move and since you were in the back of the pit, you would’ve been in everyone’s way.

jongseob tightly held your hand as he guided you through the crowd, smiling so wide that his cheeks were hurting. the same could be said for you, too, as you followed him wherever he took you. waiting at the same bus stop wasn’t long and the entire time, you were just staring at each other with permanent smiles on each of your faces.

your hands were still intertwined, even as you sat on the bus.

“so wait, you knew who i was already, and liked me, before i even introduced myself to you?” you asked, grinning on his shoulder as you finally had the quiet environment to ask him about all the details. he blushed at the sudden question, using one hand to hide the bottom of his face.

“do we really have to go through this right now?” he asked, feeling incredibly shy at how close your face was to his (as if you weren’t sucking face a couple minutes ago), especially with that mischievous look in your eyes.

“no, we don’t have to, i just want to hear you talk about it.”

“so, you just want to have your ego boosted?” he teased, playing with your fingers as he smiled in amusement. you clasped your hand around his, chuckling and just resting your head on his shoulder. he leaned on the top of your head, wondering how things worked out so well.

it felt like something out of his dreams.

the man of his dreams was nestled into his side after seeing one of his favorite singers. kissing him during one of his favorite songs, finally making him his boyfriend. jongseob couldn’t help but stare out the window with the widest smile on his face.

taking in his surroundings, he cautiously reached for his film camera on his side. he could tell that halfway through your trip back you had fallen asleep so he wanted to be sure not to wake you as he took the photo. it was cheesy, but he wanted to have something to immortalize this night and the memory of it. he’d never forget it, he knew that for sure, but he wanted a physical token of what has happened and the deep meaning of tonight.

after taking pictures to his heart’s content, he simply leaned his head against yours and waited until you both arrived to your bus stop.

— a couple weeks later

“what do you have there?” you ask, rolling over in bed to look over jongseob’s shoulder.

there was no one home at the moment, so you were being as freely affectionate as you wanted. it had been a couple of weeks since the night of the concert and it has been nothing but perfect since. not only were the two of you finally out of school, making it officially summer (jongseob had passed his math final with flying colors, not to your surprise since he really was so smart).

the window was open, letting in the occasional breeze to cool you two off. but the both of you were laying in your bed, shirtless as you tried basking in as much cold air as possible. jongseob had told you he had something to surprise you with, digging through his bag with his back turned to you.

“i made sure to ask for two copies of each one,” he said, pulling out a thick envelope. your arms were wrapped around his waist, resting flat on his bare stomach and softly stroking up and down. he looked at you with a smile, presenting what was inside with an expectant look on his face.

when you finally realized what it was, you detached yourself from his back in a moment’s notice and took the papers into your hands.

“oh my god, jongseobie,” you gasped, taking in all of the photos your boyfriend had captured on his film camera and looking through them in pure excitement, “wait, i didn’t know you took a picture then,” it was the one of when you were sleeping on his shoulder. you smiled at the memory, fondly looking at your boyfriend and leaning in for a quick peck.

“you’re too handsome i had to,” he compliments, knocking his forehead against yours before pulling away.

“thank you, baby, but so are you — i mean, c’mon, look at you,” you squeeze his cheeks quickly while looking through the rest of the photos of the night. the memories were still vivid in your mind, “i like this one a lot,”

it was before you arrived at the venue, when you were riding the bus there. looking at it on a physical copy now, it was so obvious how deep your affections for each other were. jongseob leaning into your body that was unexplainably close to his, a blush on both of your cheeks, as well as wide grins.

“i love you,” he says quietly, kissing the bare skin of your shoulder several times over before resting his cheek against your warm flesh. you smile at the affection, turning back to face him properly.

it slips off of your tongue so fluently at this point, an easy, “i love you too,” directed to him and only him. and now you’re both smiling at each other like idiots.

— jongseob, who has a crush on you for the longest time and doesn’t know how to act on it. the type to ignore it at first, in hopes of it just dying down so he doesn’t have to worry about it since he already has so much on his plate. but once he realizes he’s in too deep, thinking about you in every passing second, he doesn’t fight against his feelings any longer. he’s content just being aware of them, not seeking for more in fear of rejection or ridicule. but once he knows it’s safe for him to show just how deep his adoration and love for you is, he’ll be as unrestricted as possible in showcasing it to you — eager to show you what he had been withholding.

"in the heat of the summer, you're so different from the rest. you know, you know, you know, oh oh. you know that you should be my boy, oh, yes, you know, oh yes, you know"

[bussyslayer333]

Looking for somebody (to love)

summary: a flurry of bad dates leads bradley bradshaw to you.

pairing: bradley bradshaw x reader

word count: 5k+

warnings: swearing, mentions of alcohol, smut, big dick bradley 🙏 MDNI 18+

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Phoenix had pushed him into this, dating wasn’t really Bradley’s scene. As much as he rebuked Jake’s love ‘em and leave ‘em mentality Bradley wasn’t much better. It was easier that way, no strings and no one left pining when he inevitably was sent on deployment.

He’d been on three dates in total so far this month, each one worse than the last.

The first wasn’t so bad in comparison to the rest. Her name began with an L, Bradley couldn’t quite remember whether it was Lana or Lara, either way Jake had set them up which should have been the first red flag.

She was pretty and blonde, definitely Jake’s type. In fact, Bradley was pretty sure he’d been on a date with the female version of Jake Seresin. The whole date she had talked about herself, and not in the cute, rambley sort of way that Bradley could get behind. But in the braggy, daddy’s money kind of way.

“Yeah and that’s the story of how that bitch of a barista burned my tongue off.” Lan/ra snarled, picking her fork at her salad.

“Oh, yeah, that sounds horrible.” Bradley tried to sound sincere.

“And I didn’t even tell you about the time a waitress scuffed my vintage Dior bag-” She interrupts herself, “fuck is that a tomato?”

Bradley looked up from where he had been cutting at his steak (that she had turned her nose up at) and winced, recalling how she had made a large scene out of not having tomatoes in her salad.

Unfortunately, one of the younger waiters at the restaurant managed to walk past their table as said revelation took place. Bradley’s date snapped her fingers in the poor waiters face, stilling him and looking down at her in fear.

“Hi miss, how can I help?” The waiter, who couldn’t be more than 17, stuttered out.

“Help?!” She looked to Bradley as if to encourage him to join her in complaining.

Bradley looked at the waiter apologetically, hoping for this to pan out calmly. Much like everything else that happened in Bradley’s life, it did not go the way he wanted it to.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” Lan(r)a snapped, staring angrily up at the boy.

She stared at him expectantly, clearly waiting for a reply. Bradley wondered if it was worth slamming a few bills on the table and making his way out now.

“Uhm..” The waiter is looking around now, making pleading eye contact with who must be his manager.

Bradley finally tries to speak up, maybe diffuse the situation, “It’s okay, look I’ll just pay and we can get out of here.”

Lan(r)a objected once again, “We won’t be paying for anything! I want this meal free of charge!”

Bradley held in a laugh at her use of “we”, she had made it very clear at the start of the date that he would be paying. He was going to anyway, but her insistence made Bradley’s eyebrows furrow. Before her grating voice could start again, Bradley looked to the waiter.

“If you could just get us the bill, please?” He tried his best to communicate how apologetic he felt through his eyes and hoped that the waiter understood.

The waiter scurried off, fearing for another berating and in lieu of finding the bill.

“Why did you do that?” Bradley’s date seethed.

“I didn’t want to cause a scene,” Bradley didn’t really know why he was explaining himself to this girl.

“Whatever, Jake told me you were a dick anyway.”

Bradley laughed, loud. This girl could not be serious. He stood up and did what he should have done after the first ten minutes of being here. Slapped a hundred on the table and walked out.

In his car, Bradley considered his options. He could go home drink a few beers, maybe wallow about that pitiful date and pass out. Or, he could drive to the Hard Deck where he knew all his friends would be and chew Jake out.

He chose the latter.

“Bagman, what the fuck?”

Jake span around from where he was bent over the pool table, a smile plastered on his face.

“Not with Lana?” Jake chuckled, winding his neck around slightly trying to see if she was in tow.

“Fuck no! Why did you send her on a date with me?” Bradley all but whined to Jake.

By now Phoenix had made her way back from the bar top and was interested in what had seemingly got Bradley’s panties in a twist.

“She’s a friend, I thought you guys would have a lot in common.” Jake’s smile still scheming.

Bradley scoffs, “Like what?”

“You’re both bitches.” Jake cackles, picking his beer out of Phoenix’s hand.

Bradley’s pissed. He all but snatches the beer from Jake’s hands and takes a long swig.

“I’m never going on a date ever again.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Bradley’s vow of no dates didn’t last long. Phoenix had tricked him into another date, this time with someone of Coyote’s choosing. She was one of Javy’s sister’s friends and around the same age as Bradley and she was a total knockout.

When Javy had shown Bradley a picture he thought he was getting pranked. Seeing her in real life was even more insane. He’d decided this time on a more casual date, drinks at a bar in downtown San Diego. Although he was regretting his casual attire now. He definitely should have worn the black button up, Bob said it made his arms pop or whatever.

“Hi, I’m Bradley. Javy’s friend, you must be Maria?”

“Hey.”

Bradley’s eyebrows quirked slightly, maybe she was just nervous?

“Do you want to go in and get some drinks?”

“Sure.”

Okay maybe she’s just a woman of a few words, Bradley liked that. She’s mysterious, and hot. He’s sure he can crack her, maybe a few longing glances with his puppy dog eyes and she’d be done for.

Or at least that’s what he thought.

“So, what do you do for a living?”

This was one of Bradley’s many ice breakers he had tried, and he still couldn’t figure out for the life of him whether this girl was that uninterested in him or if she was actually just this goddamn boring.

“I model.”

“Oh cool, I mean I’m not surprised you’re totally beautiful.”

“Thanks.”

Even the bartender was looking somewhat sympathetically at Bradley’s poor attempt at saving this date. They sat in another few seconds of silence as Bradley wondered whether she was going to ask him a question. She did not.

“…yeah I’m a fighter pilot, like Javy?”

“Cool.”

Bradley was about to gouge his eyes out with the trendy metal straws sat in a ceramic pot on the bar top next to him. He mulled over whether he should bite the bullet and ask if she really even wanted to be here. He decided on a more polite version of that.

“So.. what made you decide to come on this date?”

Maria sits quietly for a moment, sips at the straw of her daiquiri and hums.

“I’m not sure.”

Bradley was going to bang his head on the table.

“Yeah I don’t know, I’m not really into guys with facial hair.”

Bradley snorts as he takes a sip of his beer, and Maria pulls back slightly disgusted. He taps a finger against his moustache in consideration. Was she hot enough for him to get rid of the stache?

No.

“Okay, cool. I’m not sure this is gonna work out.”

“Yeah.” Maria shrugs.

Bradley nods curtly, and pays off his tab. As he’s walking out he notices a guy approaching Maria, clean shaven. Bradley sees for the first time tonight a smile grace her face and rolls his eyes.

He’s on the phone to Phoenix as he enters his apartment, “Seriously Phe she was the most boring girl I’ve ever met.”

“What, because she didn’t like your moustache?”

“Shut up, you know that’s not why.”

Phoenix can hear Bradley pacing around his apartment and the opening of the fridge, she hears the clink of a beer opening and decides to bite the bullet.

“Look, I know these past two dates haven’t been great but I have one more for you-”

“Absolutely not.”

Phoenix huffs.“Hear me out. pleeeeeeeeeea-”

Bradley cannot believe he’s on the phone with a thirty year old woman, “Oh my god, fine.”

“She’s an old school friend, recently broken up with her boyfriend so she’s not looking for anything super serious and she’s your type to a T.”

Phoenix can hear Bradley tapping his foot on the wooden floor of his apartment, a sign he’s clearly thinking about her offer. He hums,

“Nothing serious?”

“Not at all.”

Phoenix holds her breath.

“Ugh, fine.”

Bradley hopes he doesn’t regret this.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Clare is exactly what Bradley was looking for, as much as he hated to admit it; Phoenix was right. Clare was just what she promised to be, funny, not looking for anything serious and exactly Bradley’s type. Honestly the date was going pretty good considering the horror show that the last two were.

“Nat never told me her pilot friends were so handsome.” She flirted.

Bradley chuckles into his wine glass, “I think Nat would probably throw up if she called me handsome.”

“She’s still that stubborn?” Clare giggles.

“As ever.”

There’s a lull in conversation as flirtatious looks are exchanged whilst they both sip at their wine. It gives Bradley a chance to remind himself to text Phoenix a thank you message.

Clare breaks the silence, “How come you’re single? I feel like you’re too good to be true.”

Bradley stews, wondering if he’s going to reveal himself so early on in the date,

“Well, if I’m being completely transparent I’m usually more of a one night stand kind of guy.”

Clare smirks, “What if I told you that was exactly what I was looking for?”

Bradley’s eyebrows quirk in intrigue, “Oh?”

“I just got out of a long term relationship so I don’t want to jump into something immediately, buuuut I like you Bradley. You’re cute.”

Bradley laughs, “Cute?”

Clare rolls her eyes, “You know what I mean.”

Bradley feels the tip of her heel begin to trace its way up his calf, stroking up and down lightly. She looks up at him smiling and he widens his legs, a suggestion for her to continue on her ministrations. It’s a nice kind of teasing, that promises a fun night ahead for Bradley. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t excited. However, Clare suddenly removes her foot from his calf and sits up straight, Bradley’s about to whine when a deep voice from behind him speaks,

“Shit, Clare?”

Bradley turns to see who Clare’s eyes are locked on. There’s a tall man stood behind him and a pretty woman slightly to the side, her dress short and red.

“Fuck, Daniel what are you doing here?”

“I’m with my date,” Daniel gestures to you.

You frown as the woman you now know as Clare glares at you.

“Yeah well I am too.” Clare folds her arms and gestures to Bradley.

You let your eyes wander to the man sat opposite her. He’s attractive, wavy brown hair, tan skin and muscular. He’s somehow even pulling off his porn stache. You finally pull your eyes away from your date’s ex girlfriend’s date and back to whatever was unfolding in front of you.

Daniel scoffs and gestures to Bradley, “This guy?”

Bradley isn’t sure whether he should be offended or not. As he sizes Daniel up he catches your eye, you’re even prettier on second look. You make a look at him as if to say “is this really happening right now?” and in that moment he decides he likes you infinitely more than Clare.

Clare rolls her eyes at Daniel, “Yeah, and what new skank have you got with you?”

Your eyes widen. This girl cannot be serious. Daniel had told you he’d recently gotten out of a long term relationship but he failed to mention it was clearly with someone who was still hung up on him, and probably vice versa. Your eyes wander back down to Clare’s date who has a disgusted look on his face, clearly equally surprised and annoyed by her words.

He speaks up for you before Daniel does, “That was uncalled for.”

“Bradley you don’t know what Daniel or the girls he used to cheat on me with are like.”

Repulsed by the newfound revelation about your date and tired of being slandered by a girl you’ve never met, you storm out of the restaurant. Early winter air in San Diego is chilly, especially at night when you’re wearing a skimpy slip dress. Your heels clack along the concrete loud enough that you don’t hear the footsteps approaching behind you. A hand grasps lightly at your shoulder and your shake it off in anger,

“Fuck off Daniel, this isn’t going to work.”

You spin on your heel, ready to berate him further when you realise it’s not Daniel at all.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have jumped out on you. My name’s Bradley.”

Bradley. Clare’s date. He’s gorgeous, big brown eyes lit up by the moon. He’s looking at you with so much concern you don’t even realise that you’ve started crying until he raises a hand to wipe a tear off of your cheek. You blink quickly, willing the tears away and chuckle wetly,

“Sorry, I’m so embarrassed.”

“Please don’t be.” Bradley’s thumb swiped across your cheek in a comforting gesture.

“Hey, do you want to go on a walk?” He suggests, offering his arm to you.

You let out a shaky breath, “Yeah, okay.”

You walk slowly along the sidewalk, arm in arm with Bradley as he tells you about himself and asks about you. You learn that he’s 35 and a fighter pilot for the navy and probably the most charming man you’ve ever met.

He looks at you hesitantly, “Can I ask you something?”

You smile at him reassuringly, “Of course.”

“Why were you on a date with that douche bag? You’re way out of his league.”

You giggle at his suggestion and stare at him as you continue to walk, trusting him to guide you.

“My friends thought I needed to get out more, but every date I’ve been on this past month has been horrific.”

Bradley cackles, “No fucking way!”

You frown at him slightly, not enjoying the feeling of being laughed at. He quickly picks up on your expression and rectifies what he said.

“Sorry, shit, it’s just that’s exactly what happened to me.”

You cock your head to the side and let a small grin onto your face, “Really?”

Bradley smiles, “Totally.” He carries on, “The first girl was insufferable, I’m pretty sure my friend only picked her to annoy me.”

You chuckle, “Damn, why was she so annoying?”

“All she did was talk about herself and her money, and then flipped on the waiter when there was a tomato in her salad.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah.”

You look up at him and giggle, somewhat uncontrollably. He joins in with you until your both leaning on each other for support. Once you’ve stopped laughing and alarming the other people in the street, you realise you’ve come full circle in your walk and back to the front of the restaurant you had left. You peer into the window and see Daniel sat where Bradley was previously, sticking his tongue down Clare’s throat. You hold down another bout of laughter as you look at Bradley’s shocked face.

“They fucking suck, don’t they?” He whispers into your ear.

You look back at him, “Oh 100%.”

You look into each others eyes for a moment, not really sure where to go from here. You hesitantly speak up,

“I should call an uber.”

Bradley frowns, “No way, I’ll drive you.”

You smile, teasing, “Haven’t you ever heard of stranger danger, Bradley?”

“I promise I’m not an axe murderer, sugar.”

You scoff in mock offence, “I’m talking about me.”

He rolls his eyes, “I’ll take my chances.”

Bradley’s bronco is clean, he has a pine scented air freshener dangling from the rear view mirror next to some mini fuzzy dice and he lets the radio hum 70s r&b hits whilst you direct him to your apartment.

When he comes to a slow in front of your apartment building you consider your options for a moment. Were you really about to let the first man who genuinely made you laugh for the first time in months slip out of your hands? Fuck no.

“Would you- Do you want to come up to my apartment with me?”

Bradley is so glad you have more initiative than him.

“Yeah, definitely.”

He steps out of the car and jogs round to help you out of your side. He’s holding your hand as you step down and once your feet are planted on the ground you look up at him and giggle,

“Definitely?” You tease, hand dragging up and down his chest.

He smirks at that and fires back, “I mean, I can just go?”

You roll your eyes and turn on your heel, taking his hand in yours and dragging him behind you, “Yeah sure.”

In your apartment, you make quick work of kicking your heels off. You make your way into the kitchen and return with two beers. Bradley’s sat on your couch, legs spread invitingly wide. You hand a beer to him and he smiles,

“Thanks, gorgeous.”

It’s impossible to ignore the way he makes your stomach flutter with want. Once you’re planted on the couch next to him he pulls your legs onto his lap and strokes a hand up and down your calf.

“So, tell me about your tragic dates.” He speaks, startling you out of your daze.

You take a sip of your beer and lean back, dragging your eyes across his face. He looks genuinely interested so you decide to indulge him.

“The second one was definitely the worst.” You chuckle in memory.

“Colour me intrigued, gorgeous.”

You rolls your eyes at the pet name but continue, “This guy took me to dinner and made eye contact with my boobs the whole time, and when I say the whole time I mean like I couldn’t even tell you what colour his eyes are because we never made actual eye contact for long enough.”

Bradley laughs at your explanation and can’t help himself but glance down at your exposed cleavage, he shrugs appreciatively, making a little “ow!” sound when you smack his shoulder lightly.

“Anyways, he kept insinuating that I was going to sleep with him and when I told him I wasn’t interested he immediately asked for the waitresses number.”

Bradley splutters into his beer and mumbles something about your date “fumbling the bag.”

“I’ve gotta see a picture of this guy,” Bradley laughs, curious as to what type of man could have such audacity.

You smirk and reach for your phone on the coffee table and quickly swipe open instagram, clicking on his profile in your recently searched. You hand your phone over to Bradley and he places his beer down before swiping through the pictures. He outright cackles,

“This fuckin’ guy? He’s literally the size of one of my thighs.”

You look down at his muscular thighs where your legs are resting and suck in a deep breath. When you look back up Bradley’s showing you a post on his instagram where he’s awkwardly stood next to two beautiful girls clearly dressed in some type of festival outfits and clearly not friends with him. Bradley’s laughing so loudly you consider your neighbours complaining.

You pout at him, holding in your own laugh, “Don’t be mean! He’s kind of cute in his own right?”

“Sugar, how do you expect me to believe that when you don’t even believe it yourself?”

You hum at his explanation.

“Besides, I think I have a good grasp on what your type is.”

You raise you eyebrows at his statement, “Really? Enlighten me.”

Bradley quirks his upper lip, “Well first off you like big tall guys, maybe some would even describe them as hunky.”

You giggle as he continues.

“Brown hair, brown eyes, huge dick, killer moustache and absolutely hilarious. Am I missing anything?” He peers down at you, teasing smile on his face.

“What was that middle one again?” You cock your head to the side in faux innocence.

“Killer moustache?”

“Nope.”

“Brown eyes?”

“Not quite.”

“Ohhhh, huge dick?”

You giggle, “Yeah that was the one, I was wondering why you think that’s part of my specific type?”

Bradley grins, “Well, you seem to like every thing else about me.”

Your stomach burns with desire at his confidence and you have to quickly compose yourself to answer.

“Well since we don’t have any proof, I’m not sure I can hold you to that, handsome.”

You move your legs from his lap and tuck them under yourself, moving your front towards him until your breasts are pressed up against his bicep, lips hovering over his ear.

“Unless you’re willing to provide some?”

You meet Bradley’s lust filled gaze and he groans,

“Fuck.”

His lips are on yours in an instant, his strong hands threading through the hair at the back of your head. Bradley revels in the feeling of your soft lips against his, the taste of alcohol mixing between your mouths. You’re moaning into his mouth as his tongue licks into yours. His hand leaves the back of your head in favour of gripping at your waist and pulling you over onto his lap. Bradley’s thighs are firm beneath you, as you roll your crotch down into his you get evidence of his claim and whimper into his kiss. He pulls back to smile smugly at you,

“You okay there, gorgeous?”

His cocky tone only proves as fuel for the slick accumulating between your thighs and you whine as you grind down onto his hard cock, straining against his dark jeans.

“I’d be better if you fucked me.” You whimper out.

Bradley chuckles, playing with the hem of your dress,

“Is that what you want, sugar?”

You aid him in pulling of your dress, once it’s flung on the floor you speak up,

“Right now? More than anything.”

Bradley is biting his lip, eyes trained on your breasts as he reaches out to grab at them.

“Shit I can’t blame that guy, you’ve got great tits.”

Your roll your eyes at him and prepare a quip, but all thought are wiped from your mind as he reaches down and swipes his tongue across your pebbled nipple. Instead, you moan out his name breathily with another roll of your hips.

“Bradley, please.”

He pulls back and looks up at you, “What do you need, sugar?”

“You, Bradley.” You whine, nimble fingers already unbuttoning his shirt.

Once you’ve finished with his shirt, you help him slide it from his shoulders and where it sits tight around his biceps. As you suspected, he’s just as muscular under his shirt. You reach down to suck at the skin of his chest, marking his pecs.

“You’ve got great tits too, Brad.”

He grants you with a laugh which turns into a moan as your small hands begin to palm at his cock. Your touch is momentarily stopped as you help him remove his jeans and boxers. You’re sat before him staring with your mouth slightly agape at his sheer size.

“Jesus,” You murmur, hand reaching out to stroke him slowly.

Bradley wants to gloat but your touch feels so good that he doesn’t want to risk you leaving him high and dry. He watches in awe as you reach forward to spit on the tip of his cock, using your saliva as lubricant as you speed up your strokes. Once you begin to lightly circle his tip with your tongue he pulls you back up with a whimper,

“Sugar, if you carry on i’m going to cum.”

You smile coyly, “Isn’t that the whole point?”

Bradley reaches a hand down to pull at your lacy underwear. Once he’s removed it he cups your pussy, the feeling of his large, warm hand making you shiver in excitement.

“I was kind of hoping to be inside of you before doing that.”

You grind down into his hand as he speaks, finger tips grazing at your clit deliciously.

“Well don’t let me ruin your plans.”

Bradley’s eyes roll back slightly at your words and he pulls away his hand to lick at the juices you left. He hums down at you,

“Delicious.”

You whine and turn your back to him, lying into the couch and arching your back up so that your ass is pressing against his hard cock. You wiggle your ass back against him and feel some of his precum seep out onto you.

“You gonna fuck me now?” You simper at him, turning your head slightly and giving him your best doe eyes.

He reaches a hand out to stroke at your flushed cheek, “How could I say no to this pretty face?”

You keen under his praise and squeal as you feel him guiding his cock through your folds, collecting your wetness onto himself. Bradley groans at the feeling as he begins to push into your hole, the way your velvety walls are squeezing him is almost addictive.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he finally bottoms out after what feels like hours of him pushing his considerate length in. You feel so fucking full with him pushed all the way into you.

“You good, gorgeous?” Bradley asks, care in his voice evident.

You moan and push back against him, “Shit yeah, you feel so good, so deep.”

Bradley feels a whine catch in his throat at your words and tentatively thrusts into you. When he’s met with a high pitched moan he takes that as a sign to start moving.

Bradley’s thrusts are deep, making you whimper with each one. Managing to make you feel even more full than before. He has both hands placed at your waist, strong grip almost intoxicating.

The sound of slapping skin and your combined moans fill up the space of your apartment as Bradley keeps up his pace. You’re beginning to drool slightly onto your couch as Bradley lifts your body up so that your back is pressed against his chest. His strength is so attractive to you that you can’t help but let a strangled moan fall from your mouth. He smirks at the sound and reaches one of his hands on your waist down to toy with your clit. The action makes your jolt as your pleasure suddenly intensifies. You turn your head and whimper into his neck,

“Fuck, Brad please.”

Bradley’s starting to think your moans are the best thing he’s ever heard. He only increases his ministrations, spurred on by your whimpers, close to making the sound himself as your walls clench around him. Bradley increases the pace of his thrusts quickly, determined to push you over the edge. It’s working faster than you would have liked and you would have felt embarrassed was it not for the way he also increases the pressure on your clit, making you twitch and squeak out, “Bradley! Oh my God!”

You can feel him chuckle breathlessly into your shoulder, his breath on your hot skin making the coil growing in your stomach tight. With one last quick thrust the coil snaps and you’re moaning unabashedly as you spasm on his cock. Your moans are music to Bradley’s ears and the feeling of your pulsing walls pushes Bradley to his precipice.

He pulls out quickly and flips you over so he can look at your gorgeous blissed out face as he cums. It spurts out in thick ropes onto your belly and Bradley groans deeply at the sight, growling as you reach down with a few fingers to swirl it around and lift it back up to your lips.

He’s still heaving whilst looking down at you. The sight of his sweaty chest dropping up and down enough to make you squeeze your legs as another flood of arousal leaks from you. He catches sight of the action and smirks, but chooses not to taunt you any further.

He finally speaks up, “Was that good enough proof for you gorgeous?”

You giggle up at him, hair splayed around your head, reminding Bradley of and angel.

“Maybe I need some more?”

You widen your legs for him to look down at your pussy, arousal dripping from you. He whines albeit somewhat pathetically.

“Yeah I think so too.”

When Bradley wakes in the morning, his arm is draped around your naked waist. He smiles down at the sight and picks up his phone to text Phoenix a quick thanks for sending him on that date.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

a/n: sorry guys i’m on my big dick bradley agenda rn !!!

i love this so i hope everyone else does too HAHEJA

also apologies for the filth i literally cant help myself

pls comment, reblog or send me an ask and tell me what u think !!!

thank u for reading :))

- honey <333

[wonderfull-star]

Is it just me or do people just overestimate Peri in some aspects?

Especially people on reddit. I haven't watched the entire cartoon yet, but damn. Some people SERIOUSLY think Peri is a super caring perfect godparent and a really kind character. Like, the best version of Cosmo. Are you serious?? It feels like some people who think that haven't watched the original series. Because people there clearly overestimate Peri and underestimate Cosmo. Yes, Cosmo is far from a genius, but he's definitely not a complete idiot either. And he definitely has a lot more experience than his son. He's already thousands of years old, while his son is only in his 20s…

I feel sorry for Cosmo and Dev 😭

Well, yes, Dev is a spoiled kid. Yes, he used magic for bad purposes. However, he is still just a child who, despite everything, tries to become better. Even if he does such thoughtless and bad things. Well, what else can you expect if no one in particular was involved in his upbringing, and his father himself does not pay enough attention to him.

I am also sure that when Peri first met Dev, he was more worried about his job at first. Which is understandable. After all, it was his first time and he was afraid of making even the slightest mistake. Because of all these rules and his peculiarity of magic, he developed severe anxiety.

I think the idea of ​​creating Poof as an adult is to show through his character the real difficulties that people go through at this age and the pressure of society. And you know, it suits him so well. In the original series, he was always in the spotlight and everyone always had high expectations for him. It is clear that at an older age, this will not affect him in the best way.

Still, sometimes Peri didn't behave in the best way. He had just gotten his job at the first time. Even with all the education he had gone through, it wouldn't make him a good godparent right away, that's for sure. After all, what's important in this job is not the training but the experience itself, which he clearly doesn't have yet. People also forget that Peri initially wanted to be a tooth fairy not a fairy godparent. So I wonder: wasn't it primarily the influence of his parents and the fact that THEY wanted to see him in this job and not Peri himself? In real life, unfortunately, this often happens and all this later ends in a not very good way.

So even if Peri had Hazel as his godchild, it still wouldn't have solved the problem. And not because he's bad as a godparent, but because this job is simply not right for him. In some moments, he acted pretty disinterested even when Dev wasn't acting like an egoist. Yes, now people will throw various excuses at me about this, but still. However, it's even clear that Peri clearly doesn't enjoy this job. Seriously, if you remember Cosmo and Wanda from the original cartoon, they mostly enjoyed what they do (although they've been doing this for thousands of years). The thing is that they just get along well with children and find a common language with them. Perhaps I think the creators wanted to show the problem in choosing your profession and what you really like to do in life. And what difficulties you have to go through to find what you really like to do.

But some people just don't care about it, considering Peri the best in literally everything. In fact, they consider him as tumblr "star"man and Dev as a simple spoiled child. Crazy fans forget that almost every character has their own shortcomings and bad sides. Well, and also the opposite of all this. I consider Peri more as a neutral character with his good qualities and flaws. Still, it is impossible to deny that in some moments he really did not act in the best way.

Peri’s simps detected 📸(don’t take it seriously lol)

And this is a very common situation in fandoms…

[i-heart-hxh]

is Killua truly jealous of Palm?

Yes, I absolutely think he is!

It's never explicitly stated, but the subtext is so in your face in a few different ways that it's essentially not even subtext any more.

Togashi could have chosen so many different ways to portray the way Killua feels about the Gon/Palm date subplot, but making it clear over and over again how bothered Killua is by the whole situation absolutely reads as jealousy, especially within the larger context of the arc. Look at these especially!

Togashi puts so much emphasis on Killua's expressions and distress throughout the whole subplot. Of course it's partly intended to be comedic, but this situation with Gon and Palm does have serious emotional weight for Killua as well--pulling out the needle, his breakdown in front of Palm, what she ends up saying to him after that, etc. I do think the exaggerated and extreme ways Togashi expresses Killua's feelings are intended to make the audience go, "Oh, he's really jealous, isn't he?"

People can argue Killua's reactions are just because of who Gon is on a date with (someone unhinged/violent and much older than him), or that it's just "concern" about Gon because of his nen situation, and those are both definitely aspects of what's going on here--but to reduce it down to only that ignores those deeper emotional impacts it has on Killua. I think the protectiveness aspect is something Killua uses to veil some of the other things he's feeling about it even though of course he is legitimately protective of Gon in this situation (and he has good reasons to be so). I also think Togashi himself uses the ambiguity to his advantage here, because if he put in romantic jealousy that was any clearer, would Jump allow it?

The way Killua goes immediately from the topic of going on dates/being freaked out about the prospect of Gon having been on dates before to feeling heartbroken because he wants to be with Gon forever the next panel is telling, in my opinion... (The English translation is a little vague, seems like it was intentionally toned down. In the original Japanese version he says he wanted to be with Gon forever.)

Here's a post where @tjlnn22 and I discuss this weightlifting scene in more detail.

I firmly believe that a big part of Palm's role as a character is to get the audience to question the nature of Killua's feelings for Gon. Without considering this context, the way her character is set up from the beginning and what role she's intended to play in Chimera Ant Arc is confusing. But when if you look at her character as having been built for that role, suddenly her entire character and subplot makes sense. Here's an older post where OP talks about some of the framing of Palm's character, and then I talk in more depth about why Palm is written the way she is.

It especially makes sense when you consider that the date with Palm is one of the factors that destabilizes Killua's faith in his relationship with Gon, leading to him wondering if they're acting together as friends or just as teammates. Here's an awesome post @tjlnn22 put together and submitted to me on this topic, with specific details supporting this argument. I think this is an important part of the arc that gets overlooked, and I love how clearly it's laid out in the linked post.

Killua also acts dismissive of Gon worrying about Palm to the point where other characters comment on his behavior, which to me seems like another sign of jealousy and bitterness on Killua's part. Then when he encounters Palm again after her transformation, this is how he behaves towards her:

Hands on his hips, full sass mode here. Again with the jealousy...

...And then shortly after this he proceeds to have a total emotional breakdown when he admits to himself that he thinks maybe Gon cares more about Palm than him, and that Palm might be the only one who can help Gon, rather than Killua. Of course there are more factors than this behind his breakdown, including him getting pushed away by Gon prior, but this is DIRECTLY the thought that leads him to start crying and then sobbing on the ground.

The Palm subplot is one of the biggest things in the series that makes me confident that the romantic subtext around Killua's feelings is completely and utterly intentional. The way the whole subplot is constructed, the decisions Togashi makes around Palm and how she's presented as a character, the way Killua's reactions and emotions are emphasized with regards to it, and the significance of this subplot in the greater arc of Killua's character all show a great deal of thought and care, and it's hard to come to any other conclusion when looking at it carefully.

Thank you for asking!

[hundredandsix]

loser!ellie headcanons (part two)

Thank you for all the love on part one! I can never get enough of loser!ellie so here's some more. This is a mix of canon!ellie and modern!ellie. Slutty thoughts at the end. mdni (18+)

✩ She bought a skateboard because of some video she saw on TikTok, but she's actually really good at it. She likes it when you watch her and she tries to show off. She'll teach you if you let her, but that's mostly so she can feel you up while she's helping you. She will always be there to catch you when you fall. If you get so much as a bruise, she whips around with the first aid kit.

✩ If you mention any sort of interest that you have, she'll want to learn everything about it. Whether it's a song you like or your favorite book, she wants to know it inside and out. Her interests are really important to her, and she likes when you talk to her about them, so she wants to show you that same love.

✩ She will play guitar to impress you. In the game, this was her way of making a move on Dina and I just l love that ("Maybe I could play guitar for you later" 😏). I hate to say it, but she is definitely very pretentious about her music taste. She'd be like "I'm gonna play you a song, but you probably don't know it. It's pretty underground." Her skills make up for it, though. And watching her fingers slide across the fretboard is an added bonus.

✩ Her nails are so short. She's always playing with her fingers and biting her nails when she's nervous. She tries to grow her nails out on her left hand so she can strum her guitar better with her fingers, but she ends up biting them down every time.

✩ Speaking of her fidgeting, she loves it when you try to ease her anxiety. You're constantly pulling her fingers away from her mouth and setting your hand on her thigh to stop her from bouncing it. She'd really like it if you put your fingers in her mouth instead, but she wouldn't voice that.

✩ When she has a crush, she's aware that until she gets to know them, she's just falling for the version of them in her head, but she can't bring herself to care. She is a little delusional, but that's not going to stop her from imagining your wedding even though she has said maybe three words to you.

✩ Her brain malfunctions when she sees even the slightest glimpse of the skin under your clothes. When you lean forward and your shirt rides up your back a bit, her hand is already reaching out to grab you. She can't help it. The feeling of your soft skin against her palm is like heaven to her.

✩ If you got coffee together, she'd either order it black or as an iced espresso to seem cool and mysterious. She'd choke it down, but then you'd roll your eyes and share yours with her. It makes it even better because canonically she hates coffee, but she wants to at least try to like the things you like.

✩ She has terrible insomnia. Sometimes she forgets that you go to sleep at a normal time, and you'll wake up to find 20 text messages from her throughout the night. She'd take selfies in the .5 setting and tell you to set it as your phone background.

✩ She doesn't like coffee, but her insomnia has led her to ingest an unhealthy amount of energy drinks. She likes Monster the best because the cans look cool.

✩ She'd roll her eyes when you call her pretty, but she secretly loves it. Ellie has never really viewed herself as beautiful. It doesn't bother her, but she needs to be shown that beauty exists in other ways than the male gaze. She just wants to be your pretty girl :(

✩ This is off-topic, but she for sure has a thing for milfs. She'll joke about it with you, but she's dead serious. It's probably the mommy issues...

✩ Her phone case is clear but, as all clear phone cases do, turns brownish. She refuses to change it because there's a Polaroid of the two of you in the back and she's worried it will get bent if she tries to take the case off.

✩ Has polaroids of you everywhere. She doesn't actually own the camera, so she always steals it from you when she comes over. There's one in her wallet, a couple on her fridge, and a few special ones under her mattress ;)

✩ Anytime you go out, she will absolutely under no circumstances let you pay. Even if there's $2 in her bank account. She doesn't care. It's a pride thing. You remind her that she doesn't always have to take on that role in the relationship, but she just wants to take care of you.

✩ She will not bring you around Joel until you are officially together because he can be clueless and will expose her loserish ways. He's also one of the most important people in her life, so she wants to be sure you'll stick around before she gets more vulnerable with you.

✩ She loves feeling wanted. So many people have abandoned her in her life that she needs someone who is secure and will sort of act as a foundation. She loves when out of your way to do things for her without expecting anything in return.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

✩ Just because of all she's been through, I can't imagine her liking choking. But that being said, she loves it if you just rest your hand at the base of her neck or over her pulse point. She likes the weight of it and the trust it shows. Her hand always seems to find its way there on your neck when things are getting steamy.

✩ I could see her calling herself "daddy" as a joke. Like when she hits her target on the first try she'd jokingly say "Who's your daddy?" But if you kept bringing it up and initiated it in the bedroom, I think she would accidentally develop a liking for it. She'd try and fail to suppress laughter if you called her "mommy" though.

✩ She loves to mark you. Sometimes she feels like she doesn't deserve you, so it helps her to look at the marks she leaves behind and remember those tender moments between the two of you.

✩ One time she was going down on you, and all the stimulation randomly disappeared. You looked down and she was leaving hickeys in the shape of an "E" on your inner thigh. She likes having little secrets like that. Sure, you have other friends and commitments, but at the end of the day, you will be hers in ways people can't even comprehend.

✩ Poor baby would combust when you praise her. Just keep telling her how good she's doing and how she's making you feel. She can nearly get off to your voice on its own.

✩ She has a thing for morning sex. You aren't sure if it's your messy hair or the sound of your groggy morning voice, but she can't get enough of you. She loves that you are the first thing she sees in the morning and gets so overwhelmed with emotion that she just has to show you what she's thinking about.

✩ She's not grossed out by period sex. She won't go down on you, but she's seen plenty of grosser things than a little blood. Plus she hates to see you in pain and will do anything to give you relief. Even if it's only temporary.

✩ You'll just be going through your day, and she'll randomly send you the horniest, filthiest text to ever exist. She might even send a photo of how you're making her feel if you're lucky.

✩ This is another thing she won't admit, but she loves when you tease her. She'll complain and whine and cover her blushy face with her fists, but she likes being under your control. And the payoff is worth it, of course.

✩ She's a hypocrite because she's an even bigger tease than you are. She'll wear rings just because you like them on her and rub her middle and ring finger around the rim of her glass in public. She'll keep you chasing for it until you're practically on your knees begging.

✩ If you put "my" in front of the pet names you use on her, you can visibly see her pupils dilate. She doesn't really care what you call her as long as she's yours.

✩ She really likes edging you, but if you even try that with her, she'll push you away and start getting herself off. There's only so much she can take before the chase gets to be too much.

✩ Before you got together, I think she would masturbate as much as you could in an apocalypse. But after it's official, I think she would rather wait for you than get off herself. She has the polaroids of you for dire circumstances like when she has to be away for a while, but to her, there's nothing better than the real thing. She knows from experience that your hand down her pant feels much better than her own.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[desceros]

me: [looks at calendar, gets a wicked idea, looks into the camera] happy springtime, turtle fam! who's ready to celebrate the season?

...mating season, that is. hehe. [dodges the tomatoes]

so! i had the idea that it would be super fun to have a community-wide event where we all have a prompt and then everyone fills it in their own way.

...i then decided all the prompts i came up with were too good not to use, but also none of them were Good Enough to use exclusively, so i changed my mind and the prompt is now just MATING SEASON. with a few suggestions at the bottom of this post if you're looking for some.

since spring is coming upon us, i hereby invite everyone to join in the vernal festivities... which in turtle parlance, of course, means only one thing: write, draw, whatever your version of "mating season", then join me on march 1 to post it with the tag #TMNTSpringShellebration. we then shall browse the fine selection of our mutual artistic efforts, and basically just have a good time as a community.

here are the prompts i came up with as starters-slash-things-to-include if you're looking for a place to get started. feel free to use these at will, or use them to come up with something of your own:

“Please don’t make me explain this. It’s humiliating as is.”

Oops, Looks Like Mating Season Came A Week Early This Year

“…In all of my mating seasons, this has never happened before.”

“I told you not to come by! It’s mating season!”

Probably should have expected it to be different now that he’s not going through it alone.

Because of Shenanigans, you have to wait. Wait… Wait… ok now.

They’re not the right person for mating season… but they’re the one who’s here, so…

“Show me where it hurts."

so yeah! see you all on march 1 for the, uh, spring shellebration. party popper emoji

questions i imagine will be popping up and i hope will clear up here before my askbox swells beyond capacity under the cut to keep this post from being Way Too Long. also it's really not that serious it's just an excuse to write slash draw for everyone Please Don't Take This Thing Too Seriously It's Not That Serious:

"can i participate?" yes! it's literally just an invitation to do something. nothing fancier than that. no need to be following me or in my friend group or whatever.

"can i write (insert fic idea here)?" yep! so long as it's related to the idea of mating seasons, it flies. reader insert? hell yea. oc? hell yeah. solo turtle and his favorite pillow? go for it.

"can i draw (insert art idea here)?" yep! uh. i know tumblr has the cops watching for sin bin material, but you art people know how to deal with that. and if you don't, uh, ask the other art people. im just a feral cat in a trench coat

"how do i participate?" write/draw/collect songs for/whatever. then, on march 1, post it and tag it #TMNTSpringShellebration. also, for funsies, keep it hush hush what you're working on so we can all be super shocked when the day comes! except, y'know, that you're planning on joining in. totally do that.

"when do i post it?" march 1. whenever on that day. waves hands around in a vague gesture at time zones not mattering. seriously don't take this so seriously it's just me wanting to create cool shit with my friends with a little more structure to it

"does it have to be horny?" i mean. it's an event about mating season. so by definition it's going to be at least a little horny. but however you interpret it is cool. even if it's just. idk. leo sitting sweatily in a chair looking longingly at a glass of water bc he's thirstier than usual. be smart about things, people. i'm not your dad.

"which tmnt verse is this for?" whichever one you want it to be for!! rise! bayverse! 2007! your fan iteration! your friend's fan iteration! your mortal enemy's fan iteration! yes!

"will you be reblogging everything?" absolutely not, but this isn't an event About Me. i am incidental to the thing. it's about Us. coming together as a community. for horny turtles. puts my hands on your shoulders. do it for you. for your friends. for the community.

[thewritingmagician2022]

Hey! I just found your blog and I've read through your work and I love it 💗 can I request MC trying to talk the brothers out of confessing to them?

(Perhaps taking place towards the end of season 1, beginning of season 2)

The brothers tell MC they love "LOVE" them and MC thinks they're joking and when they finally realize that the brothers are being serious MC's like "I thought you had better taste... are you sure you're not just infatuated with an idealized version of me that you created in your head? I mean you can do better, besides what would the people of Devildom think? Honestly, I didn't really get the impression you liked "liked" me in that way... I think you should think it through, maybe it's because I'm a novelty that your interested in me?" Or something along those lines? The point is that MC doubts their feelings and thinks they can do better.

Thank you so much! 💓

This is one of my favorite prompts because it’s so realistic and human and authentic. Which is terrifying too because I know I’m not gonna do it justice and I’m so freaking late on this. Back on topic - what makes us special to these brothers? Is it going to last? How long until we’re nothing new? (starts playing Taylor Swift in the background while I contemplate these)

Lucifer: Lucifer is vaguely insulted by the implication that you don’t trust him to know his own feelings. Yes, he understands your self doubt because he’s the high level demon Lucifer, the best of the best, and it makes sense that you would feel intimidated by that. But to doubt his feelings is to doubt Lucifer’s judgement and that won’t stand. He knows who’s worth his time and affection (no one) and he is not willing to open himself up to such a state of vulnerability without absolute certainty. So when he says he loves you, it’s true. He’s been around a long time and you’re the only person who has been able to capture his attention and heart in such a way; he isn’t worried at all about the feelings fading or being an illusion. He is under no delusions of who you really are - the person who doesn’t listen to him and runs wild with his brothers and causes so many problems in the Devildom and also the person who brought his family back together again and who reminded Lucifer of who he used to be and could still be. He will provide you reason after reason to back his point if you need it but he really feels he should only have to express his feelings once to make it clear.

Mammon: Mammon’s feelings are definitely hurt when you question him, even if it’s coming from a good place. He knows he’s not the most serious demon and maybe he’s a bit of a tsundere but he doesn’t understand how you can doubt him after everything you’ve been through together. He’s your first man, you’re his best-friend. Mammon is no stranger to romance and flirting over the millenia; demons, angels, witches, humans, etc. He’s got options, almost as many as Asmo, but you are the only person who has ever made him feel this good, this special and loved and in love.It breaks his heart a little every time you doubt his love for you. He might not be the best at talking about his feelings but he promises that he will spend the rest of his life showing you exactly how much he loves you for you, the same way you love him for him - the good and the bad and the weird. He is yours until the end of time, whether or not you’ll ever actually be his.

Levi: Of all the brothers, Levi is probably the most understanding of your doubts - not regarding him, that’s super crazy and he doesn’t understand how you could ever think he could do better than you. He does understand how self-doubt doesn’t always follow logic so he actually does well not taking it personally when you ask him those kinds of questions. He’s a man of many hyperfixations but they’re lasting. Have you seen him with his favorite series or Ruri-chan? This man is dedication personified. He’s already added you to his list of hyperfixations and, okay, maybe he does idealize you a little but he’s not as deluded as you think. He knows you have weird, messy bits of you - just like him - and he loves that so much about you because he’s able to actually be comfortable with you. He loves you and trusts you and respects you, which is more than he can say about anyone else in his life, and he is going to be your simp long after the series finale and he only hopes you’ll agree to let him stay in your life and worship you the way he knows you deserve.

Satan: That line of questioning makes him angry, shocking. He hates that you’re doubting him and his feelings. Satan is the intellectual of his brothers (if you ask him). He’s smart enough to know that there’s a difference between lust vsinfatuation vs love, and he’s considered it for a long time before he came forward with his feelings. He knows they’re genuine and lasting; he even avoided you in the beginning to avoid catching those kinds of feelings but it happened. Satan knows maybe he can romanticize things a little, like in the romance novels that he secretly loves, but he doesn’t think it’s to an unhealthy or unrealistic level - no more than a general man in love might do. He’ll sit and discuss all of this with you for as long as necessary, reigning in that anger that stems from feeling rejected, until you finally realize that he’s genuinely in love with you.

Asmo: Okay, so Asmo gets it, you know? He’s most beautiful being in three realms and charming and funny and sweet and basically everything good wrapped into one wonderful, sparkly, good smelling package. It would make sense that any human he pursued felt a little insecure about his feelings and their worthiness. But like…it’s you! You’ve seen Asmo at his worst - the days when he’s not as beautiful or kind, when he’s selfish and cruel and narcissistic - and you’ve stuck by his side the whole time. He is going to do the same for you. He sees your inner (and outer) beauty every time he looks at you and he falls a bit more in love with you every time. He knows what lust and infatuation feels like - he feels those every day and has them reflected right back at him tenfold. You are not those things. There’s still the passion and longing and affection but it’s so much warmer and steadier, like the warm sun that Asmo used to see in the human realm. You make him better (a hard task considering how close to perfection he is) and he won’t stand for you having any kind of doubts. He’s going to love you into loving yourself until you’re unable to doubt him or your relationship ever again.

Beel: That’s…not unfair to ask him. Beel may not be the smartest brother but he’s not as stupid as others make him out to be. He is the only brother who is going to hear you out and actually take the time to think about what you’re saying. You are the first human he’s ever had these kinds of feelings for, the first person actually. Beel is not used to romance at all and so he really needs to think about the line between romantic and platonic and familial; he doesn’t want to mess up the relationship by defining it incorrectly and breaking both of your hearts in the process. He doesn’t agree that you’re not good enough or interesting enough to inspire those kinds of feelings in him; he thinks you’re the most wonderful being he’s ever come across and anyone would be lucky to know you, let alone be loved by you like he is. It doesn’t take him too long to come the conclusion that no, he is in love with you. He would choose you over food or sports or even some of his brothers; hefeels empty without you in a way that even Belphie can’t compare to. He wants to kiss you and hold you and keep you around forever to share in his food and laughs and affection. Once Beel makes his decision, it’s completely solidified. Beel is a ride or die kind of man and you know you’ll never have to doubt him once he tells you he loves you.

Belphie: Belphie is torn. He understands why you may question his love for you. He did betray you and literally kill you in another universe; he would be more concerned if you weren’t skeptical about him. However, you feeling not good enough? Absolutely absurd. You need therapy ASAP. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to him and his family, even if you are a human. He never wanted these feelings; he loathed you at first but, over the months and different experiences you’ve shared, those feelings have grown to respect and trust and love. He couldn’t stop himself from loving you even if he tried (and he’s tried). He can understand your nerves but he knows down to his very soul that he loves you and that he will always love you. If you can’t accept his feelings, he’ll be the most accepting of it, especially because he doesn’t think he deserves you at all but he will never back down from his claims and he will continue expressing his love for you until the very end.

Diavolo: Of them all, Diavolo most understands why you may doubt the longevity of this relationship. He’s the demon lord. He’s the top choice of the realm, and everyone is scrutinizing him and his choices. He gets why you might be afraid of that and what comes with it. However, he wouldn’t be choosing you if he hadn’t thought long and hard about it to make sure his feelings for you withstood all of those doubts and fears. Diavolo does not lovely easily or lightly; he’s been offered companionship from more people than he could ever care to count but he’s never seriously considered any of them. You are the first and only person to have made him fall so completely head over heels in love that he’s able to get out of his own head which is so often filled with those some kinds of doubts and questions. He may not make every decision in his life with 100% confidence but this is one that he feels so sure of that he’s willing to stake his entire future and reputation on it. He loves you and he will do everything in his power to prove that he loves you and will stay by your side as you both rule the Devildom together, putting you at the top with him - exactly where you belong.

Barbatos: Barbatos is efficient, if nothing else in the world. Do you really think that he would pursue you if he wasn’t completely sure of his feelings and your future together? This is the man who has spent his entire life dedicated to Diavolo; he’s turned away from every and any meager temptation that’s come his way. No one has ever caught his eye like you have and certainly no one has ever made him question where his loyalty lays. Of course he is still Lord Diavolo’s servant and he serves the Devildom to the best of his ability but his heart isn’t in it the same way and that’s because he’s given it to you. You are what consumes his every thought and feeling; he’s broken the rules and used his powers for you, he’s gone against Diavolo for you, he is willing to do anything so long as he can be near you and make you happy. You don’t even have to accept his love or love him back, if you really can’t or won’t, but he’s seen you in every timeline and loves you in all of them. Nothing in this world or any of the others will change that and, if you give him the opportunity, he will dedicate his every moment to proving to you why you can put your full faith in him. After all, Barbatos has never failed at an assignment before.

Solomon: Solomon can understand insecurity on your end. It’s hard to consider yourself special enough to last for someone who has seen everything. Solomon has lived thousands of years, visited the three realms, love and lost time and time again. It’s hard to imagine that you’re anything more than the next shiny toy he’s got his eye on. For someone who can never die, what is this love other than a small blip on his radar one day? Solomon can’t stop you from feeling that way because, in a way, it’s true. You can’t be a permanent fixture in his life because you’re human but he can certainly be one in your life. Solomon would argue that he’s seen so many people and places over the millenia and he has lived long enough to know himself completely, and he knows that he loves you. He knows that no matter what happens or changes, his feelings for you will never waver. He will carry his love for you until the ends of time itself. It’s his curse to bear and the only thing that would make it bearable is being able to love you directly for as long as he’s given the chance.

Simeon: Simeon is the most patient and sympathetic as you ask him these questions. He would never invalidate your fears but he will confront them with you and break them down and banish them. Simeon is an angel who has watched over humanity for as long as they’ve been around. He has seen the best of the best and the worst of worst and still he’s never been tempted to turn away from his Father for one. At first, he could have explained it as curiosity and then fondness but it blossomed into the deep, unwavering love that he feels for you now. He sees your flaws and humanity and loves you all the more for it. You have become the new object of his worship and affection; he would fall from grace if it meant being able to hold you in his arms and shower you in the love he so truly believes you deserve. He will remind you every day of why you deserve to be happy and loved; he will tell you everything he loves about you from your smile to your kind heart to your most selfish desires. So, please, just put the same faith in him and his feelings that he puts in you and let him love you.

[thatprettybunny]

A Little Sleepy

Daydreamed this on a long drive. Enjoy <3

Katsuki's realized he was unfit to drive after he swerved to not hit a sheep crossing the road, but after maybe a second or so of confusion, realized it was a crosswalk. His head spun in every direction it wasn't meant to, and you both were still at least two hours away from your home. God how he craved the sweet release of your bed.

Katsuki was definitely in no position to be driving right now. He'd maybe only gotten eight hours of sleep total in the past four days, and once the clock strikes three, it would make it 6 non-stop hours he'd been driving for.

If he was delirious now, imagine him with the flashing lights of Matsufutsu blaring in his eyes.

The issue was you were in no state to drive either; you laid in the passenger seat with your neck breaking against the seatbelt, heading bobbing up each time Katsuki pressed gas and droll falling down your chin. You were still in your scrubs, and after the 18-hour shift, he suspected you'd be sleeping in the uniform. Besides, since Katsuki has been away for the past two weeks, he knew you were having a hard time sleeping, so God knows how you were still awake at work.

With a heavy brain and heart, he made a judgement call and swung off the slightly devoid highway and into the gated community only ten minutes off. He pulled into the cobblestone driveway, parking alongside the shiny silver chevrolet in the yard.

"Fuck," He hummed under his breath, willing his aching body to get up and out of the car. Slowly, he got out of the car, before opening the passenger door and attempting to wake you.

He shook you hard, but you only stirred, mumbling something sightly incoherent under your breath before spinning in the other direction and dozing off.

With no other clear option in his fuzzy brain, he hoisted you out of the car, stumbling backward as a wave of nausea hit him so hard he felt it in his throat.

He took a heavy breath, placing you to weightlessly stand on the ground until you were conscious enough to do that on your own.

"Where are we babe?" You asked, head pounding from the overuse of caffeine at work. This certainly wasn't your driveway and even worse you couldn't tell your head from your big toe with Katsuki's heavy breathing in your ear.

Perhaps he couldn't hear you, because he never answered you. Instead, he dragged you both over to the doorbell, pressing it a concerning amount of times.

Maybe five minutes passed before the door swung open, Katsuki's mom standing in the doorframe and cussing like a sailor at you both having woken her up.

"Sorry," Katsuki told her, "I don't feel safe driving home now, can we stay the night Ma?"

Ma.

This had to be serious.

She gave you both a look over; you both standing in her doorframe looking like you haven't slept in years. She sighed cursing to herself as she impatiently ushered you both inside and force you two into the kitchen.

You both took a seat, your head collapsing straight onto the smooth granite island before either Bakugo could get a word in.

"Honey? Is everything alright with Katsuki?" Masaru called from at the top of the stairs.

"Yeah, yeah. DO me a favor Love and just make sure Kiki hasn't left a mess in his room, please? They're spending the night." No further response came from the staircase, but Mitsuki didn't miss how her son flinched from the noise.

"So, why do you both look like ass?" Mitsuki asked as she filled the tea kettle with water and placed it on the stove. Katsuki gave her a slightly dazed and shortened version of the story. He hummed and listen to his mother talk about all sorts of things that had happened in the past few days (her attempt at keeping him awake), all while mixing up some herbal tea and a serving them both each a leftover bun she'd had from a grocery run.

Mitsuki lightly shook you awake so you could drink your tea, quickly reaching to catch you before your head slammed into the cup. She patiently feed you the bun and helped you drink your tea. Ignoring your mutters of "healing my ass" and other comments she blamed on the lack of sleep.

When you both finished, Mitsuki grabbed your dishes and went to the sink to wash up.

"You two, go take a shower before you sleep. Honey, make sure Katsuki keeps his hands to himself, Katsuki make sure she actually gets some sleep." She says, watching you both slowly make your way up the stairs.

In the shower, the water is hot and soothing. Katsuki lathers you with soap, as his mom predicted, hands caressing every inch of your body as you lean against him for support.

Once done, you both dry off using the only clean towel that was folded in one of the drawers. Then Katsuki helps dress you up in one of his old boxers and one of his many UA PE shirts. He pulls on another, slightly larger pair of boxers before literally dragging you into bed.

Lucky for him, not only did you leave your phone in the car, but you were downright drowsy. So you feel sleep clutched in Bakugo's arms for the first time in two weeks,

[igotanidea]

Blocked: Dick Grayson x game streamer!reader

He's so clueless and concerned in this photo it just fits the whole plotline :D

***

„DAMMIT!” her sudden yelling coming from the game room got him on his feet, running inside immediately, in search for any possible threat to her life or health.

„What is going-?” Dick stopped in the middle of the sentence, his gaze focusing on her perked up ass in those devilishly tight jeans. The view he couldn’t stop himself from indulging in for a moment, even if it was as nice as it was confusing. „Babe, what are you-?”

„Damn the stupid Internet connection!” she yelled, flexing and twisting around her gaming computer, playing with some cables and plugs, desperately trying to fix whatever was broken and failing spectacularly. „I was supposed to post a new stream today! I was supposed to do a live! Screw that! Dammit! Why is it always happening to me!?”

„Y/N. Love--”

„Agh!” she groaned in frustration and just to make sure he was not going to be hit with something she might throw his way, Dick took a step back raising hands in surrender

„Princess why don;t you calm down for a moment and --”

„Calm down?!” she snapped ,twisting head his direction, fury in her eyes, blush of anger on her cheeks „How am I supposed to calm down. Redlotus95 is hot on my heels!”

„Red Lotus....?”

„I can’t drop on second place Dick. I’m serious! I’m not giving this little piece of shit the satisfaction of stealing my fans!”

„I think you take it a little bit too far, baby. It was supposed to be fun and relax, remember. What happened to taking things casually? Why the bloodlust?”

„Screw having fun. I am quite literally at war now Dick!”

„when did you became so competitive?”he frowned at her, taking a step forward and peeling the cobweb from her face. Clearly her head office needed cleaning.

„Since I was called a petty girl doing a in a men field!” she cried out, becoming exasperated in a second.

‘I’m sorry, what?” Dick blinked once, shocked by her words. Who in their sound mind, would ever dare to call his beautiful, wonderful and killer girlfriend such words. „gimme a name, Y/n.” he hissed, clenching his fist.

„Dick.”

„A name, love.”

„Can I please see Dick Grayson again?” she rubbed her forehead, the sudden change in his demeanor, his I-will-avenge-her-name eyes included, giving her extremely clear sign of which part of him, she was currently speaking to.

„What do you --? Oh, oh, okay, i get it. But babe, I don’t need to be Nightwing to punch whoever call you that name. I can still do it in my civilian version. I mean, have you seen my muscles?” he grinned, flexing his biceps. „Hands down I can beat anyone.”

„As sweet and chivalry as that is, I don’t need you defending my honour or whatever” she rolled her eyes, equally amused and annoyed. „I can do it myself but I freaking need a stable internet connection and new hardware! I can;t possibly work with this shit!” she had to gather all the strength she had to not kick the device.

„Y/N....” Dick grinned at her, showing literally all of his teeth.

„What--?!”

***

Computer store.

That was the what.  

And damn, let’s just say that were advantages to dating a billionaire’s son, cause she definitely didn’t have to cut on the expenditure.

***

„How does that even work!?”

„Could you be quiet for a moment!”

„ But I don’t know how to use that! What do I do?! Y/N!! What do I do!?”

„You just sit here quietly and look pretty!”

„Oh, that I can do--”

„God!” she groaned, even though deep, deep down inside she was laughing at his beginner attitude. „Hey everyone” she turned to speak to her followers active online waiting for her live stream. Sorry for the little shouting and screaming. That’s what you get when your charming boyfriend try to get involve in your hobby” she chuckled a little.

The comments started appearing a moment after she explained the little commotion and Dick almost jumped on his chair, rushing to read them all.

„Oh, look Y/N! They say hi to me!”

„Mhm.. sure they do.”

„They can hear me now, right? I can tell them hi too?”

„you know I’m starting to question if you were really raised by Bruce Wayne, the CEO of the most advanced technology company in the country...’

„Hey that’s mean!” Dick huffed, his eyes still scanning the comments carefully, almost as if he was watching a villain during his patrol. „but I guess your followers think it’s cute. Oh!” he gasped and smiled wickedly upon noticing one particular message. „Been-there-done-that is asking if you can post a picture of me. Sure she can, I’ll be more than happy to show you my face and --”

She cleared her throat in a  very suggestive manner.

„Sorry...” he send her that flashing smile again and turned back to computer as if keeping his eyes on the screen made the attenders hear him better. „Ok guys, listen up, before we start the -- um--?”

„Streaming session.” she gave him a prompt.

„Yeah, right, streaming session, I got one important message for you all--”

„Oh, no, Richard, don’t--!”

„Fuck you RedLotus95 for talking shit about my girlfriend!”

Youtube blocked her for two weeks.

She blocked Dick for ever attending her live sessions forever.

[streussal]

i 100% agree with u about the fight, my question is why do you think they even included that scene? i don't feel like it tells us anything we don't already know & it gives ppl who dont remember the original scene opportunity to believe louis was the aggressor.. don't know how to feel about it to be frank

I got this ask after I made this post. Responding almost 4 days later so I don't know if the anon will see this, but I have some thoughts.

First of all, no matter how strongly a piece of media demonstrates who is the bad guy in a situation, there's always going to be people who side with the abuser, ESPECIALLY if the abuser is a white male and the victim is anyone other than a white male. Louis straight up said in the scene (LESTAT'S VERSION) "like you wrapped your hands around our daughter's neck" so it's pretty clear he's responding to Lestat attacking Claudia. On stage, Lestat goes off script and insists that it was wrong of him to drop Louis from the sky, and that afterwards Louis was "a broken thing. I know, I saw, because I am the one that broke him". He then follows this with the admission that he did it because Louis hurt his feelings, not because of any threats or violence from Louis: “I couldn’t persuade him to return my affections. I could force him to love me. And so, I broke him.” If people don't get that Lestat was in the wrong here, I don't think there's anything else the writers can do.

As for why I think the show gave us that scene:

Playing around with different points of view is neat, and showing different recollections of the same event is a recurring thing in this show. (I'm torn on whether this is Lestat's actual recollection or just something the coven added to make Louis look bad - see my interpretation that Lestat is being coerced into participating in the trial - but either way it plays into one of the themes of the series.) Yes showing the POV of an abuser could backfire if it falls into victim blaming but I think the show handled it very well (and there is a portion of the audience that is always going to see Lestat as the victim even when he straight up says he was the bad guy in a situation).

It shows Louis physically protecting Claudia AND prioritizing her over Lestat. One of the major criticisms of Louis is his failure to do either of these things, so I actually think it made a lot of people like him better. Most of the twitter reactions I saw, from people who accepted the scene as 100% fact, was people talking about how great it was that Louis was ready to kill the guy who hurt his daughter.

It allows Jacob Anderson to do something different! One of the reasons I'm suspicious of this version of events with Louis cackling is that I have not seen Louis act quite like that before. But Jacob definitely sold it! Makes me wonder if maybe this is yet another side of Louis! I don't know! It adds rewatch value.

The acknowledgement that Lestat dropping Louis from the sky really did do long term damage to Louis. Not just physically. He became "a broken thing" - there was serious psychological damage. After he got back together with Lestat, we never really saw him push back against Lestat again. A lot of his time in Paris is a reaction against being in an abusive relationship. (And then he gets in another one, which happens a lot in real life.)

But I think it's also significant that right after this scene, we saw Lestat's remorse. And a much more real apology than anything we saw in s1. Now obviously this does not fix anything. (Claudia highlights this - "Can I cry and say sorry too?" - She and Louis tried to kill Lestat and are on trial, Lestat nearly kills Louis and just gives an apology.) But it gives the possibility that perhaps Lestat has changed or realized that he needs to change. And given that the showrunner has repeatedly referred to Loustat as the central love story of the series (link)... we need to see that Lestat is not going to do the same thing again. We want him to be better for Louis. Not that it would ever be an entirely healthy relationship (they are vampires), but not "drop him the sky requiring months of recovery" level awful. (@awildwickedslip wrote an interesting post relating to this here)