#haku kusanagi x reader
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tsuutarr ¡ 4 months ago
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Pairing: Tokyo Debunker Ghouls x Reader
Word count: 12K
Content: angst, pining, loss
Summary:
Your potential death due to your curse was no secret, yet there was still a promise of time – time for you (and those who’re willing to help you) to find a cure, a solution to your plight. 
No one expected your death to come so suddenly.
(Or, a look into how the Darkwick Academy ghouls may react to your passing)
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You’re no stranger to tragedy, but your death still comes as a surprise to you. Perhaps you should’ve expected it, what with your luck continuing its downward spiral to misfortune. Maybe you should’ve expected someone who despised you to take matters into their own hands, deciding to rid this world of your existence before you became a disastrous anomaly – before you even had a chance to fight your fate.
Regret upon regret builds a castle inside your bleeding body. Apologies, confessions – all of them slowly die in your throat.
You should’ve expected it all.
But you didn’t.
So now you lay, your blood a perfect canvas to frame your loss of life.
Your sage’s ring glows dimly on your finger.
.
.
.
“The Honor Student has passed away,” the Masterpiece Newscasters proclaim, their monotone voice ringing clearly throughout Darkwick Academy. “The culprit is yet to be found. All residents are forbidden to leave the premises until the criminal is found.”
As the Masterpiece Newscasters continue to prattle on about the false information of the Honor Student’s – your – passing, Yuri can feel a headache erupt from behind his eyelids. He’s already slept less than the recommended amount today, he doesn’t need this added stress! There’s no way you’re gone, it’s just not possible. You so bravely faced that immortal anomaly after all, so how could you be dead?
Yuri Isami is only heading to your place of residence to put these bizarre rumors to a rest.
Even when he sees your crumpled body on the floor, Yuri doesn’t believe it – you must have chosen to sleep oddly!
Even when he feels the coldness of your skin, he doesn’t believe it – you just need a blanket!
Even when he doesn’t hear your heartbeat, he doesn’t believe it – you must be acting!
No, no, he has to be realistic. You’re definitely sick. He has to help you. He has to save you! He can save you! He’s the greatest doctor, after all! He can think of so many ways to save you. He can, if you just enhance his stigma, so why don’t you do it? Yuri clutches your hand in his, hands trembling.
“Why won’t you enhance my stigma, worm?” he mumbles. “You can do at least this much, can’t you? You have the opportunity to help the great Yuri Isami! It’s an honor!”
“Yes, it’s an honor to help you,” you had said, laughing. Yuri could be quite particular about laughs, but he didn’t mind yours because there wasn’t anything patronizing about it. “You’re amazing, Yuri.”
“Hmph, well, it’s good that you know your place,” he had responded haughtily. He wishes he could’ve told you how grateful he was that you believed in him. That you were interested in him and his research. That you cared for him.
Yuri’s grip on your hand gets firmer, the coldness of your skin seeping into his. He looks at your eyes, thinking of the way your eyes would light up when he would showcase his scientific discoveries.
He looks at your lips, remembering how you’d smile so grandly at him whenever you two would talk. He remembers how you’d learn what song he was humming just to hum with him.
He looks at your hand, recalling the warmth and strength he felt when he first held it. The way your hand shook due to your own fear remains engraved in his brain – the way that you supported him despite looking like you’d fall. You’ve been able to stand so long, haven’t you? You can’t be gone now.
“Jiro!” he calls, voice cracking. This surgery needs to be a success. He can’t – he won’t – hand you over to another researcher. “Bring the Honor Student to Mortkranken! They need treatment immediately!”
At Yuri’s call, Jiro immediately reaches for you, cradling you in his arms as he lifts you up. He’s never really been one to be gentle, especially in regards to corpses. As long as the corpse is intact, is there any reason to be “gentle”? Jiro doesn’t really think so. But, even so, Jiro can’t bring himself to manhandle you, tossing you around like he would anyone else.
As soon as he saw you on the floor, he wanted to gather you in his arms and carry you back to bed. He wanted to open up his suitcase and conduct your weekly health checkup. He wanted to ensure that you weren’t dead.
Unfortunately, Jiro is cursed with objectivity and he knows – knows – that there’s no way you’re still alive. He also knows that there’s no way to bring you back. Maybe if they had found you faster. Maybe if you were a ghoul. Maybe, maybe, maybe…
But it’s too late now, isn’t it?
He thinks about how you reacted whenever you saw blood and gore. He thinks about how much you fret over him and his injuries, even though he reassures you constantly. He thinks about the warmth of your palms.
He thinks about the ridiculous care you put into everyone.
“What’s this packet? I can’t eat solids,” Jiro had stated bluntly when you passed him a box. It was pink and cutesy, decorated with ribbons.
“It’s not a solid,” you said, grinning cheekily. “Look inside!”
Jiro looked at you blankly, but still did as you instructed. Yuri was strange, but you could be quite strange, too. “...Oh.”
“It’s chocolate milk! It should hopefully be easier to eat,” you beam at him. “Happy Valentine's Day, Jiro!”
Jiro cradles you closer to his chest, like you’re made of glass. You’re so cold, your skin feeling like his. He never thought that someone who was as warm-hearted as you could ever feel so desolate. “...I told you it’d be a problem for me if you died,” he murmured, softly, as he quietly trailed behind Yuri to head to Mortkraken.
When Rui hears the news of your passing, he’s pretty sure the world just stopped moving around him. He has to hear the news several more times to really come to terms with it. It’s unfair, he thinks, it’s so unfair.
You were fighting so hard. You were working so hard.
How could that come crashing down so suddenly?
It’s not fair. You of all people should’ve been able to live a long life. You of all people should’ve been able to be happy. 
He tried so hard to stay away from you, to prevent him from accidentally killing you with his curse. You tried so hard to bring him comfort, despite the looming danger of his power. He’s flirted with plenty of people, but you’re the only person he’s ever thought he’d actually love to spend forever with. He cursed himself for those thoughts, knowing that longing for something that can’t be will only hurt him more. But there isn’t an easy end to longing.
“Sometimes, I wish I could’ve met you as a regular guy,” Rui had confided in you, one day, as the two of you sat in his bar. He swirled his wine, his cheeks slightly ruddy from the alcohol. “I guess you wouldn’t have given me the time of day if we had, though.” His laugh left his lips, hollowly bouncing around his glass as he took another sip.
“You’re drunk, Rui,” you had said, though your tone didn’t hold any malice. “...But sometimes, I wish I could’ve met you before our curses, too.”
This is why he couldn’t get over you, no matter how much he tried. This is why he couldn’t distance himself from you, no matter how much he tried. You drew him in closer and closer like a trap, and he was more than okay with being ensnared, even if he was scared of being hurt.
“Chuu!”
Rui blinked, surprised, as a cute teddy bear smooches him on the cheek.
“Sorry, you seemed distracted,” you hummed, making Rui laugh.
“Ah, yeah– yeah! Sorry about that,” he responded, “I def wasn’t trying to be.”
“I know,” you replied. “But you got to pay attention now, okay? I want you to meet someone!” You waved the teddy bear’s paw. “This is Honor Student Teddy!” Through your puppeteering, Honor Student Teddy offered Rui a hand, which Rui took with an amused look.
“You’re so cute.”
“Beep! Incorrect! The one that’s cute is Honor Student Teddy!” you said, looking away bashfully. Cute. “...So, I was thinking. Since we can’t touch, maybe we could use Honor Student Teddy as my replacement?” You grabbed Honor Student Teddy’s other hand, the one not in Rui’s grasp. “See? Doesn’t it kind of seem like we’re holding hands?”
Honor Student Teddy remains in Rui’s room, pampered and loved as it should be. As you should’ve been. A dry laugh escapes Rui. 
“...Maybe this time, we can really hold hands.”
Blearily, Lyca opens his eyes, the sound of his phone buzzing waking him up. He sees that the message is from the blonde gigolo, which initially makes him annoyed. But Lyca has good instincts – his gut feeling is telling him to pay attention. So, instead of ignoring Rui, Lyca sleepily reads Rui’s texts.
His sleep soon evaporates from his being.
“It’s a lie!” he yells, jumping out of his bed and running to his bedroom’s door. There’s no way you’re gone. There’s no way he’ll never be able to smell your sweet scent ever again. There’s no way you won’t lay down with him and gently thread your fingers through his hair. There’s no way you won’t be able to draw together again. There’s just no way. There’s no way!
But even if Lyca wants to burst out of his bedroom, following your scent to find you, he can’t open the door. He can’t open the door to confirm if you’re really gone. He doesn’t want to go downstairs to see that you’re not waiting for him. He doesn’t want to go to the balcony where you’ll no longer be able to eat with him.
Lyca doesn’t want to lose you. Opening the door to the bedroom feels like he’ll lose you. Carefully, he goes back to his bed, where the blanket from Neros and the blanket from you lay side by side.
“Lyca!” you beammed, making Lyca tilt his head. You had a sweeter scent than usual today. Something that indicated that you were quite happy.
“What’re you so egg-cited about?”
“Heh.” You gave him a big grin. It was something he’d come to like seeing, especially since so many on campus gave him a grimace. “Ta-dah!” With a flourish, you presented Lyca with a soft blanket. “I got you a gift!”
Lyca frowned, looking at the blanket in confusion. “I already got one.”
“Yeah, I know,” you responded, not at all discouraged by the bite in Lyca’s tone. “It’s an extra one! I thought it’d be nice if you could have some more blankets. You can be twice as warm and cozy now!” There was a hint of hesitation as you say your next words, “I can take it back, though. Sorry, I guess I got ahead of myself.”
“...S’okay.” Lyca took the blanket from you, feeling cozier as soon as he touched the soft fabric. It smelt like you. He liked how you smelled – in some ways, it reminded him of home.
Lyca looks at the blanket on his bed, the one that you got him. He grabs it, softly, in his palms. He remembers your encouragement when he had told you that he’d work hard so that he could live with humans. You said he could do it and when you said it, he really did feel like he could. So, you can’t be gone yet. He needs you.
With a deep inhale, Lyca snuggles the blanket that smells like you because maybe, just maybe, he’ll be able to chase you and tell you not to leave him if he memorizes your scent.
Rui’s message about your death comes as a surprise to Ed even though he knows that human lives are fleeting – they’re fragile and easily broken. In some ways, that is why Ed has always thought that human life is so beautiful. 
Still, he thinks your life would’ve been so much more beautiful if you had lived it to its full extent. If you could’ve continued to laugh like you had, if you could’ve continued to shine bright like you had – he thinks you’d have made the world a better place. 
He’s lived for many years, yet the loss of someone he considers dear somehow still stings. He thought he managed to rid himself of such stinging emotions, yet it appears that even age does not make you immune to loss. 
Or perhaps you're just one of those humans – one of those humans that make a lasting impact on those around them. But how could you not make an impact? After all, you were so hardworking, both for your sake and for others. 
Who wouldn’t find you precious?
“Okay, Ed! Let’s watch some sad movies!”
Ed had texted you a few minutes ago, bemoaning his exhaustion. He hadn’t expected you to barrel into his room, a bag of snacks in your hand.
“My, my. What brought this on? Not that I am opposed, of course.”
“Well, you said you were tired, right? And you also said you drink tears, right? Well, I brought over some movies I’ll definitely cry to!” you gave him a confident grin. “Don’t worry, Ed. You’ll feel better really soon!”
“How reassuring,” he mused, welcoming you into his messy room. Rui had cleaned it up a few days ago, but Ed found it quite difficult to maintain cleanliness. You didn’t comment on it as you made your way over to him, settling yourself by his side. It was quite cozy.
Laying in his bed isn’t quite as cozy if you’re not there, he realizes. He scrolls through the videos you’ve sent him, imagining how you reacted to these videos. It is reassuring in some ways to have remnants of you left behind, but the pain that he can now only reach you through the remnants of your memory leaves him feeling vacant.
“Being with you really does bring up old, old memories,” he muses. “Perhaps it’s because you remind me a little of her.”
He wonders if there’ll be anyone who reminds him of you.
Not everyone who dies becomes a ghost. Yet, deep inside, Zenji had hoped that you’d have turned into one like him. He had hoped that you’d be able to spend time together, finally being able to hold your hand in his. However, he knows that it’s a selfish desire, one that cannot come true. He scoured the entire campus for any sign of your soul, after all, and came up empty handed.
He wishes that you could’ve been alive instead, then.
He’d rather live by your side, unable to touch you, than not be able to see you at all.
He’d rather you live your life like you want to, happily.
He wishes he could’ve done something more for you – after all, you’ve done so much for him. He’s a ghost, someone that most don’t know the existence of. Yet you made sure to greet him and spend time with him whenever you had time. You’ve been a source of his inspiration, his muse, because of how much you make his heart swell with joy.
He is an artist, so creating is in his blood. However, how do you create when you lose a piece of your hope? How do you create when you lose your source of inspiration?
“My dear, what do you think about this piece?” Zenji had asked, flourishing his biwa with grandeur. 
“It’s great!” you said, earnestly. “I especially like how it felt like a full narrative – I got so tense when the biwa’s sound got deeper in the middle, just like the climax of a story!”
“Astute observation, my dear! That is indeed what I was aiming for.” Zenji couldn’t express the unexplainable joy that blossomed inside his heart when he heard your praise. You were a beacon of light that shined in the desolate lands. You were the purple wisteria that danced from the tree branches over the Hotarubi lake. Your beauty, your kindness – it was all so beautiful to him. He felt like the moon to your sun. “I really am the luckiest fella around.”
And now, he’s the unluckiest fella around, Zenji thinks. You’re no longer by his side. You’ll never be by his side, at least, not in this lifetime. The thought makes Zenji’s heart throb painfully. “Maybe we really did meet too late,” Zenji murmurs, watching wisteria petals float around the lake. “But it’s all right. I promise I’ll find you in the next life.”
 Haku can’t say he’s ever been too happy to be able to see ghosts. Sure, Zenji’s fun to be around and it’s not like his ability really harmed him in any way, but he can’t really think of many times he’s been glad to have his ability. When he hears of your death, denial is the first thing that settles in his brain. Then, the grief follows. But hope blossoms in a corner of his mind. He can see ghosts – maybe he’ll be able to see you? Hope glimmers in the corner of Haku’s heart as he tries to find you.
The glimmer soon dies out, however, because it’s all for naught. Not everyone becomes a ghost. It was foolish of him to think that you’d have become one.
But then what’s the point of his power – his stupid ability to see ghosts? What’s the point of it if he can’t even see the one he wants to see?
Haku feels like it’s all a big practical joke from the universe, and he wants to be in on it because he’s failing to see what’s so funny.
Living an ordinary life, dying an ordinary death – that’s something you deserved to experience, and now you’re gone. It’s an inexplicably painful feeling that stabs at his heart. How is he supposed to fill the hole you left behind?
“I don’t know if this is a good idea…” you murmured, looking shy.
“You look beautiful,” Haku said, easily, a teasing grin on his face at how flustered you looked. His words were far from teasing, though. They were filled with an earnest praise of how gorgeous you looked decorated in white. Just seeing you in wedding attire made him think that it’d be a shame if anyone else got to see how beautiful you looked, but also a shame if no one else got to see. A weird balance of wanting to show you off, yet wanting to keep you to himself lingered inside him.
“Sure, sure,” you grumbled without any bite. “Let’s just get this over with.”
“Thanks for agreeing to help, by the way,” Haku said, offering you his hand to take. You took it gratefully, before you shook your head with a laugh.
“It’s nothing. I’m glad I can help your junior in some way, though.”
“Yeah, she really appreciates your help.”
“Good.” The satisfaction on your face made you glow with a sort of shine one could only find in gold. It was precious, it was soft, it was so darling that Haku wanted to make sure that you continued to glow and shine forever. Even if it meant that you weren’t by his side (even though he so desperately wanted you by his side).
“...I know I’m being selfish – but sometimes, I wish you’d forget about me…” he murmured, low enough that he hoped you wouldn’t hear it. You gave him a glance, only squeezing his hand in response. He wasn’t sure how to interpret your reaction, but a part of him wants it to indicate that you wouldn’t ever forget him, even if forgetting him would most likely make you happier.
It’s hard to balance the desire of being remembered and the desire of being forgotten.
He wasn’t sure what he was feeling.
“But I guess that doesn’t really matter now, does it?” Haku muses, looking at the skies above. Stars sprinkle the navy-colored sky like diamonds. He can only hope you’re out there, shining.
From the age of four, Subaru was molded to perfect the performing arts. A child star, a prodigy – those are the titles given to him. He never feels like he deserves that praise – he’s not sure if he’ll ever feel like he deserves that praise. After all, growing up, anxiety was his most reliable companion, following him everywhere he went. How can he not doubt himself?
Yet while he breathed the performing arts, he’s developed mannerisms most around him find peculiar and odd. It’s hard not to think of himself as a bother when he can’t seem to blend into society as well as he’d like.
Because of his oddities, he never thought he’d ever be able to have a normal school life. Somehow, however, he's able to come to Darkwick Academy, experiencing pleasant social interactions due to the kindness of the people around him – people like yourself. You’re someone who Subaru can find a semblance of comfort in, despite his anxiety.
He knows he’s probably annoying you, but you’re always there, always so patient. You don’t make fun of him for his discomfort, nor do you push him beyond his boundaries. Instead, you patiently wait for him, allowing him to walk alongside you at his pace.
So when Subaru hears the news that you’re no longer with the living – no longer with him, he can't stop his mind from spinning. You’ve always been someone that waited for him patiently, yet now you’ve gone off by yourself to somewhere he can’t reach.
Emptily, he looks at the sakura mochi on the shelf – he had bought it for you. You’d eat his meager offerings with gusto, even if not all of them suited your palette.
He’s not sure how he’ll stomach some of the food he’s eaten with you from this point onwards. You’re not here physically, only your memories lingering in the ingredients of his meals. He’s not sure if he’ll be able to stomach the food you’ve made for him if someone else makes it, either.
“I’m sorry,” he had said, running up to you, out of breath.“I didn’t mean to be late.”
“You’re not!” you responded cheerily, patting the spot next to you. “Come, sit!”
“Thank you.” Gingerly, Subaru took the spot next to you, placing his hands on his lap. You peered at him curiously.
“Where’s your lunch, Subaru?”
“Ah.” Subaru ducked his head in embarrassment. “I ended up not being able to get anything.” Despite making you wait, despite his best efforts, he just wasn’t able to secure anything. How shameful. “But it’s all right. I can drink water for lunch.”
“No, don’t do that,” you chastised, lightly. “I actually packed my own lunch today because I thought it’d be busy everywhere. I packed a lot, so why don’t we share?”
“Ah–” Subaru looked at the delectable way your lunch box was crafted. “No, I’d hate to intrude.”
“You aren’t intruding, Subaru.” You nudged one of your lunchboxes into his hand along with some chopsticks. “I’m offering! I’m actually pretty happy with how some of these came out. Won’t you try some?”
At the delicious smell of your lunchbox, Subaru’s stomach let out an embarrassing growl. His face flushed, mortified, but you made no comment on it, instead offering your lunch again. “Well, if you insist,” he murmured, finally taking a box from you. 
Once he took you up on your offer, you dug into your own lunch. Though, Subaru couldn’t help but notice how you’d glance at him nervously. It was kind of cute.
Not wanting to waste your kindness, Subaru took a bite of the lunch, before his eyes widened with glee. “This is delicious!”
“Whew– I mean, great! I’m so glad,” you beamed. “If you tell me some of your favorite food, I can try to make it for you! I can’t guarantee it’ll be as good as Sho’s, but I can try!”
“I couldn’t ask you to,” Subaru responded, bashfully. The thought that you cared for him was enough to satisfy him. “I would hate to be a bother.”
“You’re never a bother, Subaru.” Your voice was so kind, so soft and genuine that Subaru didn’t really know how to react.
“Really?” Disbelief laced his voice. He hated being a bother but always felt like he was. He knew that you were already spending your precious lunch with him when you could spend it with anyone else. There wasn’t any way you’d care about him to that extent, right? 
“Subaru?” you asked, concerned.
“I just can’t believe it – why…” Subaru paused, suddenly hit with a bout of embarrassment. “Ah– I don’t want to seem like I’m testing you, I just… I get really anxious sometimes… I’m sorry. I’m being weird, aren’t I?”
“You’re not.” Your voice rang clear inside the storm in Subaru’s head, letting sunshine stream through the clouds. “I’ve never thought you were a bother. I actually really enjoy my lunches with you.”
“Really?”
“Yup! So if I’m not too much of a bother, let’s eat more lunches together!”
Subaru had promised, promised that he would. He promised that you’d always eat your lunches together because that’s what he sincerely believed. He believed that you two would be able to bask underneath the sunrays, seated on your favorite bench, laughing.
He wants to believe that you’ll still be able to eat together. He wants to believe so desperately. Because who else could bring him the comfort you did? Who else will patiently wait for him to catch up, gently guiding him when he needs it?
But now you’re gone – you’re gone. You won’t be able to come back. It tears at Subaru because his anxiety and inferiority complex tell him that it’s his fault – that he could’ve done something, anything, to save you. 
Why couldn’t he save you?
Why couldn’t you have been saved?
The room that Subaru is in feels too big for him as it slowly fills with his grief.
According to Article 230 in the Japanese penal code, “a person who defames another by publicly alleging facts shall, regardless of whether such facts are true or false, be punished with penal servitude or imprisonment not to exceed three years or a fine of not more than 500,000 yen.” Doesn’t Darkwick know that? Why would Darkwick allege such odd things like your death, Ritsu wonders. Still, he’ll record what the Masterpiece Newscasters are saying – after all, it’ll be useful to leverage against Darkwick when he takes you to argue his cases.
There is little he finds more important than being able to argue his cases, which indicate his proficiency. He needs to be proficient in order to be able to become a fantastic lawyer like his father – this has always been his goal. Even after meeting you, it’s been his goal.
Some may have thought that you would’ve been a distraction for Ritsu, but he’s certain that your presence in his life has been for the better. You’re a fantastic business partner, being perfect to bounce his ideas off of. It’s admirable that you’ve taken on the mantle of ridding yourself of your curse, too. Ritsu finds that most people aren’t that hard working or really worth his time (unless they’re clients), but you’re different. You’re worth his time.
“Could I ask you to accompany me a little longer?” he had asked one day as you’re about to leave the diner. “I realize it’s outside of business hours, but… I would appreciate it if you could make a special exception.”
“Oh?” you looked surprised, though it was soon replaced with a smile. Your smile was something Ritsu appreciated seeing nowadays – something that felt like visible proof of Ritsu’s hard work. “Yeah, sure! I have time. What do you need?”
“I have to go over a few notes,” Ritsu responded, passing a notebook over to you. “I’ve already gone through these once, but I’d appreciate it if you could go through it, too. It’ll prove beneficial for you.”
“Yeah, sure, leave it to me!”
Your eagerness to help Ritsu cemented the fact that you were the right choice for his business partner. As the hour slowly trailed on, the both of you focused on your respective reading, Ritsu found that he didn’t quite mind spending time with you like this, outside of business hours. He found your presence calming, yet also helpful – he found it easier to focus when you were around.
It was nice. Even as the two of you began to wrap up, Ritsu wasn’t in as much of a hurry to disappear. 
“I’ll take your thoughts into consideration,” Ritsu said as you two left the diner. The night sky stretched out beautifully above you two. Ritsu had never noticed it before.
“Sounds good!”
Ritsu cleared his throat, offering you a hand to shake. You shook his hand without much preamble. He appreciated it. “It seems we make better business partners than I would have expected. I look forward to a long and prosperous relationship with you.”
“Likewise.”
He still thought about the smile you’d given him that night, bright like the moon. It was a smile that made it obvious that he had someone by his side to support him – someone that he can support in return. 
So, there’s no way you’re gone. Not when you have him as a business partner. That’s a ludicrous thought.
Still, he can’t seem to shake the ill feeling from his body. Why aren’t you responding to your texts? You’re usually quite timely unless something has come up. Something…
No, there’s no way you’re gone. There’s just no way.
Ritsu’s grip on his briefcase tightens.
He feels like he’s going to be sick.
Romeo wants to scream, so he does. “Everyone, leave!” His voice echoes in his room, his workers trying to scramble out of Romeo’s wrath. With a frustrated string of curses, Romeo collapses on his expensive chair, the one encrusted with diamond – the one that you’d complimented.
Romeo truly, utterly, feels sick. He feels annoyed. He feels disgusting. His perfect porcelain skin is marred with wrinkles, a frown deep set in his face. How dare you – how dare you have the audacity to leave him. He never gave you permission to do things like this, so how could you go away? He’s always known you were bad at following directions, but this is too much, even for you.
No.
What’s too much is that someone, someone, thought that they could come in and take you from him. How dare they! They didn’t even get permission from him! They didn’t… So why would they? They can’t take you away from him, not when you’re the only one that listens to him. Not when you’re the only one who seems to care about not making wrinkles appear on his face. Not when you’ve been doing your best.
It’s not fair. It’s just not fair.
“Why are you carrying that?! What if you drop it and it breaks?” Romeo exclaimed, watching you carry a very expensive vase.
“Ah – I heard you say that the guys who’re supposed to move this haven’t done their job, so I thought I could help!”
Help?! Romeo couldn’t help but look at the way your arms trembled with the weight of a price that far exceeded your budget, doubt coloring his face. “I’ll get one of our young guys to do it, so put it down already!”
You huffed, putting the vase down carefully, with a defeated sigh. “Sorry, I just wanted to help.”
“Help where you’re actually useful,” Romeo grumbled, crossing his arms. If those idiots that he’d asked to move the vase actually moved the vase, then he wouldn’t be in this predicament. “Those WTWUT make my life much harder.”
“Wall-to-wall useless trash, huh?” you mused. Romeo thought that amusement looked good on you – it gave you a cocky look that suited you. If only everyone else could be like you, then he wouldn’t be as stressed as he was. 
“I need a face pack,” he muttered.
“Do you want me to get it for you?”
“Hm. Sure.” Romeo paused. “Get one for yourself while you’re at it.”
“Me?” you looked at him with curiosity and shock written across the apples of your cheeks.
“Who else?”
“I just… I dunno. Do you think it’s okay?”
“Of course. What could you possibly be afraid of?” Romeo asked. “You’re one of my people! Who’s going to say anything?”
You looked contemplative, before a light smile crossed your features. “That’s true. I guess no one can really say anything to you.”
Your words make him feel powerful. Your actions do, too. When he’s with you, he feels like the world is in his palms. But now he’s without you. Now, he’ll always be without you.
Anger thrums through his veins. 
You’re one of his people. How dare they take you away from him? Romeo won’t stand for it. He’ll snipe down the bastard that did this to him – that did this to you.
“You BTH!” Romeo yells, storming into Taiga’s room with the fury of a thousand bulls. “You’re still lazing around?”
Taiga doesn’t respond, twirling a gun in his hand. He’s not entirely in his right mind right now, but he can still pick up “revenge” and “snipe” among the various words Romeo spews.
“You better do your part,” Romeo hisses, finally deciding to leave Taiga alone. Maybe Romeo would’ve stayed longer to nag at Taiga if Romeo were in a better state of mind. Taiga can’t really bring himself to care at the moment, though, his own state of mind is a jumbled mess.
Flashes of memories, flashes of thoughts – they alternate inside his head, before phasing out of existence. He’s not sure when it started, but his mind has been deteriorating, memories floating in and out of his head. What most would consider “common sense” is also something Taiga has been losing grasp of.
Even in spite of that, somehow, you’ve made your way into his brain, like a little parasite that burrows into his thoughts. He didn’t think he could remember someone – not in his current state of mind, anyway. He didn’t think he could form an attachment to you either, not with how he just doesn’t want to care anymore. The world’s going to burn, everything unfurling into a messy pile of futures that could be and won't be. It’s all messed up, it’s all gonna be messed up. Yet, somehow, despite all that, Taiga can’t help but think of you as some source of light, a beacon of hope that he kept around to stop him from completely drowning in the dark murkiness of the future.
“That’s it, kitty-cat,” he had said, placing you in his lap as he prepared to play another round of blackjack. “I feel like my luck’ll change if you’re around.”
“I don’t know about that,” you responded, watching as the dealer handed out everyone’s cards. You fidgeted in his lap like a cute little cat, clearly trying to break your discomfort.
“Quit failing around,” Taiga said, looking at his cards. To Taiga’s amusement, you settled in his lap to the best of your abilities, leaning into his chest. He pulled you closer, as he continued to play blackjack. 
The longer he played, the more he felt some odd sense of peace with you snuggled in his lap. Your smell and warmth wrapped around him like a little security blanket. In some ways, it made him want to consume you wholly until you couldn’t think of anything else that wasn’t him. It made him hungry.
But now, there’s a hollow feeling inside of him, something that bypasses physical hunger. He hungers for your soul that’s now no longer here. The pitch-black murkiness of the future spreads even further across his eyelids, being the only thing he can see. Fate has dealt him a bad hand that he had tried to win against.
He never could win, though, could he?
“Tell me something, would you?” Taiga laughs in his empty room, eyes staring at the ceiling. He searches and searches, but can’t find any sight of you. “What could I have done different to change this outcome?”
Ren has always thought that coming to Darkwick Academy was a mistake. His experience didn’t exactly start off nicely, what with him being sorted into Jabberwock and having to deal with the annoying Jabberwock captain. All those stupid anomalous animals made it so that he rarely had time to himself, even if he tried his best to lock himself in his room.
Still, there’s a silver lining to everything. Sure, Towa keeps trying to feed some odd looking porridge. Sure, Haru is still meddlesome and annoying. But they’re… not bad. And you’re here, so it’s kind of okay. 
He’s always thought that people doing annoying things for the sake of friends or whatever were delusional – frankly speaking, he could care less. Yet, when he looks at you, he thinks that maybe there are people out there who do things because they want to. Initially, you’d been somewhat of a doormat to him, but then he realized that your voluntary help came because you care about others – about him.
He can’t count the number of times you’ve come to help him out, whether it’s with the anomalous animals or a raid in his new game. You’ve just… always been there. He didn’t think it was possible, but your constant presence had carved out a you-shaped hole in his life, a place only you could fit.
So how’s he supposed to fill that emptiness now? It’s all your fault, Ren thinks. If only he hadn’t met you… but then, if he hadn’t met you, he doesn’t think he could’ve survived.
“Well done me for surviving another day…” Ren had grumbled, dusting his jumpsuit off. He hated getting dirty, but it wasn’t like he could avoid it in Jabberwock, especially if Haru was going to hound him continuously. 
“Good job, Ren!”
He looked up, seeing how you still looked cute despite the mud and disheveled hair. He found it kind of unfair. “Oh, same to you,” he said. “I don’t know how you can do this stuff voluntarily.”
“The animals are cute and you guys need the help,” you replied, waving at him to bend down. “Ren, there’s some mud on your face. Do you mind if I wipe it off?”
“Huh? You’re the type who does this kind of stuff, huh?”
“Ah, sorry–”
“No, you can,” Ren said. It wasn’t like he gave you permission to help him because he wanted to feel your touch, though. It was because he couldn’t stand the mud on him. Yup. That was definitely the reason. Still, even then, he couldn’t help the way his heart thudded against his chest as you gently wiped the grime off of his face. “It’s from that stupid bull anomaly kicking dirt in my face, isn’t it?”
“I think that’s when it happened, yeah,” you responded with a laugh. “But I’m here if you need me, so I can help you.”
Ren didn’t know what to say to your honest desire to help him, it was oddly sweet of you. You had been his only real source of comfort, what with everyone else wanting so much from him. You were the only one who watched his B-horror movies with him – the only one who’d game with him.
“There, all done! Let’s go back to the dorms. I’m sure you’ll feel better after a shower.”
“...Thanks,” he muttered, walking with you back to the Jabberwock dorms. The skies were painted shades of pink and purple, the sun ready to head to bed.
“Even though it’s hard work, it’s nice to be able to see the sunset, huh?” you hummed. Ren liked the sound of your voice – not too loud like Haru’s and not too incomprehensible like Towa’s.
“Yeah.” He breathed in deeply, feeling the fresh air purify his lungs. “Every day here is a fresh hell, though.”
“Aw, Ren,” you laughed. “Yeah, it’s pretty hard work, huh?”
“...Yeah. But, you’re suffering through it with me, so I guess I’ll stick it out for a little longer…”
But how’s he supposed to stick it out now? You’re not here anymore. You’re not going to be there to help him. You’re not going to be there when he wants to watch his B-horror movies or play games. You’re not going to be there when he buys you a drink as he walks you home.
You’re not going to be here. And he didn’t even get to say goodbye…
Ren’s always been bad at goodbyes – he couldn’t even wish Calamari farewell. But he’d have rather been able to say something to you since he’s not going to be able to say anything to you ever again now. Never, ever again.
Ren doesn’t know how he’s going to survive.
Ever since Towa found out about your death, the skies in Jabberwock have been marred with thick clouds and thunder. His precious, precious Dandelion – how can you be gone? You can’t be gone yet. You haven’t told him all the love stories you had in your arsenal. You haven’t tried all the flowers Towa wants to offer you. You haven’t shown him all the reactions you’ve stored away for him to slowly bring to the surface.
You can’t be gone just yet, he won’t allow it.
Murkiness swims inside Towa’s heart as he grapples with the anger and sadness that fight and merge into an incomprehensible seed of emotion that is planted deeply within Towa’s heart. Should he just strike everyone down? You’re not here, so as long as he avoids Haru, it doesn’t matter who he hurts. It’s not like he particularly cares about anyone else on campus anyway. 
But he can’t allow his emotions to explode out of him just yet, not when the tree on the hill is dying. You care about that tree as well, after all. 
But then where is he supposed to spill his anger? His grief? Where does it all go?
Is this what love is? This agony?
Towa hasn’t ever really been certain about what “love” is. 
“Well, love can be a lot of things,” you had said, laying by his side on the hill with the tree. You were enraptured with the stars, but Towa couldn’t help but look at you. You were so much like a dandelion, your resilience and strength shining through despite your troubles. And you were cute like a Dandelion. Your voice was nice, too, like the wind that carried dandelion seeds across the world. “Like… there’s romantic love, platonic love, familial love, and all of that, you know? Even within romantic love, it can be a lot of different things.”
“Like what?” Towa asked, making you hum in thought.
“Uh… like soulmates, I guess? Some people meet their soulmates, some don’t. But even if you don’t meet your soulmate, you can still find someone you romantically love. Maybe you’ll meet your soulmate but not realize they’re your soulmate too. It’d be hard to tell, right?”
“When you meet your soulmate, it feels like getting struck by lightning. Did you know that? Have you felt it, Dandelion?” Towa’s words made you turn your head towards him, finally paying attention to him instead of the stars. Towa liked the way you looked at him.
“I don’t think I have,” you responded, truthfully. “But I’m not in a rush. I’m sure I’ll find the person I love, even if they’re not my soulmate. Hell, maybe anyone can be your soulmate. Maybe soulmates are made when you love and grow with each other. Who knows?” A yawn escaped your mouth as you finished your thought.
“Heh heh.” Towa’s eyes crinkled at the sight. “Are you tired, Dandelion? You’re so weak. It’s cute.”
“Hey!” you laughed. “I’m getting stronger, y’know.” Flexing your arm, you show off a small bit of the muscle you’ve been building up. Towa couldn’t help but be amused at your little display of strength, miniscule in front of his own power. It was hard not to find it cute that you tried to carry so many burdens on your shoulders despite your own weaknesses. Towa could only surmise that your resilience came from the love within you. He hoped that he could be a part of that love inside of you.
“Do you like me, Dandelion?” Towa inquired, smile bright. “Because I love you!”
Towa doesn’t fully know what love is – it’s an idea he’s always been in love with, but has no experience and understanding of. You’re the closest he’s ever gotten to potentially finding the answer he’s been looking for. But now you’re gone. He doesn’t know how he’ll understand love now.
He hugs the great tree on the hill, tears trickling down his face.
 When the little mermaid turned into seafoam, did she feel this way too?
Haru is always busy. He wakes up busy and sleeps busy. Nothing ever seems to stop for him, time constantly slipping through his fingers like sand no matter how fast he runs.
So why did time have to stop for you?
Even as Haru makes his rounds, Towa’s lightning in the backdrop as he works, he can’t seem to keep his mind busy enough to not think of you. Thoughts and memories of you run around his head again and again and again. They run so fast that he can’t seem to catch up.
So Haru does what he can do to maintain routine. At the very least, maintaining routine should help him adjust, shouldn’t it? But as he carries out his daily chores, all he can think about is how you’d help him around Jabberwock. How you would give him sweets to amp up his energy. How you loved Peekaboo like it was your own.
“Boo…” Peekaboo says, aware of the tenseness and wariness on Haru’s shoulders – aware of the fact you’re no longer there. Peekaboo’s tears make your death weigh even heavier on Haru’s heart as he cuddles the small beast in his arms.
“You sure are fond of the Honor Student, aren’t you, Peekaboo?” Haru had asked, looking at how Peekaboo cuddled up against your chest as you fed it. “You did nothing but bite me for the first three days after we met.”
You laughed brightly, releasing a sound that Haru was quite fond of. “The only reason Peekaboo’s not biting me is because it’s used to you, you know.”
“You reckon?” Haru responded, reaching out to pet Peekaboo who welcomed the touch.
“See? Look at that. Peekaboo loves you so much.” You gave Peekaboo a kiss on its cute fluffy forward, making the small anomalous animal make happy little squeaks. “You like your dad quite a bit, don’t you?”
The sight of you and Peekaboo together made Haru’s heart warm. He was constantly managing things by himself that he never really expected to find a stable support system. Towa, while competent, could be quite moody. Ren, too, while able bodied, refused to do a lot of the work. So, of course, work always fell on Haru’s weary shoulders. He never expected to find someone that could provide him the support he needed – like the other parent of Jabberwock. “Then you’re a bit like Peekaboo’s mother, eh?”
“I wouldn’t mind – not when my child is as cute as Peekaboo!” you replied brightly, patting Peekaboo’s back to allow it to burp. After releasing a burp too large for such a small animal, Peekaboo cuddled into you, satisfied. You hummed out a little tune as you rocked the little anomalous animal to sleep. Seeing you made a smile stretch across Haru’s face.
“Really learned the ropes here, haven’t you?” he said, gently ruffling Peekaboo’s fur. “Once we have a little cash to spare, I’ll buy you your own Jabberwock uniform!”
You’d no longer need it, though, Haru thinks, thumb brushing against the fabric of the Jabberwock uniform he had gotten for you. While you aren’t officially a part of the Jabberwock House, it’s hard not to feel like you belonged. 
But you’re no longer here – you no longer belong to the living, so how could you belong to Jabberwock? Haru wishes that you were still here, though. It hasn’t even been a day, but he already misses you. Even if you couldn’t help him out every day, just getting a text message boosted his spirits. Just thinking about the fact that you’d help him with Jabberwock duties and his personal issues helped him get through his cumbersome day.
You were someone he could depend on and he wanted to be someone you could depend on. But, in the end, he couldn’t protect you.
His responsibilities sit heavily on his shoulders.
Sho has always kept himself busy. Whether it’s cooking, playing sports, training, or something else, Sho has always liked to do something. Maybe that’s why he’s in the kitchen, cooking your favorite meal, while he tries to process what the Masterpiece Newscasters had prattled on about earlier.
You’re dead?
There’s no way. You can’t be.
He thinks back to the first case you worked on together, the one with Takeru. He had failed to protect you then and vowed he wouldn’t put you in the way of danger like that again. So how? Why?
Who killed you?
Sho slams a fist on the kitchen counter, lips pressed in a thin line. Frustration bubbles inside him as curses leave his lips in rapid succession.
You can’t be dead. You can’t. Not when you’ve been working so hard. Not when you’ve been doing everything in your power to survive. Not when you’ve inspired and helped him to the point that he still feels like he has to repay you. Not when he hasn’t done or told you everything he wants to.
“Fuck!” he yells, slamming his fists on the kitchen counter once more.
You jolted when he yelled a curse, slamming a fist on the wall.
“Shit, sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you,” Sho said, sheepishly rubbing the nape of his neck. You were fun to tease and get reactions out of, but that didn’t mean he wanted to scare you.
“What’s the matter, Sho?” you asked, putting down your knife. “Tell me. I might be able to help you.”
“It’s nothing,” Sho started to say, before the look on your face made him stop. He snorted at how displeased you looked. “It’s just that some back order stuff got delayed. I won’t have enough forks for tomorrow.”
“Oh, is that it?” you asked, looking relieved. “I have a bunch of plastic forks back at the cathedral, actually. Do you want me to get them?”
“Huh? Why do you have a bunch of plastic forks laying around?”
“Uh… let’s just say that I had some ordering issues.” You waved a hand to dismiss the question. “Anyway! I can go get them.”
“Nah, let’s go together.” He shuffled around, before pulling out a helmet and tossing it to you. “Here, this helmet’s for you.”
“Oh, this one looks awesome!” you beamed, turning the helmet around in your hands. It was in your favorite color with your favorite patterns. Sho huffed out a laugh at your response. You were so cute sometimes.
“Glad you like it. C’mon.” He pushed the door to the food truck open with his foot. “Let’s go.”
“Okay!”
“After this,” he began, closing and locking the door once you were both out of the food truck, “I got some time today, so I’ll take you somewhere. Anywhere you wanna go.”
He still remembers the way your arms felt around his waist as you clung to him while he drove. He still remembers the way your eyes sparkled watching your favorite scenery. He still remembers how his heart pounded in his chest, the feeling of liberation lifting his spirits, as he drove through the streets with you clinging to him.
Your determination has always felt like freedom to Sho – it’s what inspired him to put more effort into his life at Darkwick. It’s what inspired him to take things more seriously. 
But maybe he should’ve taken things more seriously when he had the chance. Now that you’re gone, so is his chance to prove himself to you. You've gone somewhere too far, somewhere no one else can reach. 
This isn’t the freedom he had envisioned for you.
Whenever Sho gets too emotional, Leo is quick to make fun of him. It's stupid to get too riled up, Leo thinks. The world is boring and easy to manipulate, after all. Why should he get upset? 
Leo has always been able to get what he wants – he even became vice-captain, for fuck's sake. He basically solved Takeru’s case by himself while also trying to get rid of you because your stupid stigma enhancement might overshadow him. Sure, he couldn't get rid of you then but it's not like he can't try again, especially when you keep sticking your nose where it doesn't belong.
But this isn’t how he wanted to get rid of you. Who said you could just die? It’s so stupid. It’s so dumb that it makes Leo feel angry. You stupidly kept going despite his scathing remarks, despite people walking all over you and disrespecting you, so why are you dead? You’re not allowed to be dead.
You still need to help him use Haxs. You still need to be there so he can get a sense of validation when he watches your reactions. You still need to be here because out of everyone on campus, your presence is somewhat tolerable. Who’s he gonna comfortably boss around now?
“Ha ha. You were photobombing one of my pics so I uploaded it and said I had a new girlfriend,” Leo snickered as you brushed his hair. He didn’t think you’d be so good at it, but he found that his hair was smoother when you brushed it. “10K interacts in less than an hour. Suckers.”
“Is that okay?” you asked, making Leo roll his eyes.
“It’s fine, Honor Roll. In fact, shouldn’t you be grateful?”
“That’s not what I meant.” you huffed, tugging his hair lightly as you untangled a knot. It felt nice. “I mean, are you okay? Don’t influencers get harassed if they post about their significant others?”
Leo hated this whole goody-two-shoes act you had going on. Why were you so concerned about him? It wasn’t like he was particularly nice to you and it wasn’t like you necessarily treated him better than you would anyone else. Were you just stupidly nice in general? “Being an influencer means you get hate mail anyway,” he responded, closing out of his social media app. It wasn’t really all that interesting anymore.
“Hm… I see.” You became silent, which made Leo feel oddly annoyed. “People can really suck sometimes.”
Leo snorted. He had been anything but kind to you, really, so he thought you’d have already come to that conclusion a while ago. “It’s whatever. They’re all basic.”
He knew that this was the point where you could say something about him coming to you to talk (which he would never do, barf), but you don’t. Instead, you continue to thread your fingers through his hair gently.
He hated to admit it, but it was relaxing.
“Okay, I think I’m done,” you hummed, removing your hands from him. He noted that it was slightly colder when you left, but chalked it up to the poor heat regulation in Vagastrom. “Oh, and Happy Valentine’s Day, Leo! I got you something.”
Leo turned to you curiously as he combed his fingers through his hair, which definitely felt softer. He gingerly took your offering, before his eyes widened. “This is that ultra-spicy chocolate they only sell this time of year… I’m actually genuinely stoked right now.”
“I’m glad!” you beamed. It was a smile that Leo thought was slightly less ugly than usual. In general, you had been looking slightly less ugly lately, actually. That thought made him feel nauseous.
“Wanna make a bet, Honor Roll?”
You blinked at him, suddenly looking wary. He used to think that expression was so stupid, but now he thought it was kind of cute in a dumb kind of way. “What type of bet…?”
“A bet over which will come first – me falling for you, or you getting hooked on me.”
There’s no conclusive way to find out the end to this bet now, not with you gone. But he thinks you probably got hooked on him first – after all, it’s not like he’s thinks about your stupid laugh or dumb words of encouragement when he feels down or anything. Besides, as far as the internet’s concerned, you’re already dating him.
He briefly thinks about uploading a post about your death. Those suckers online would eat it up, sending him pity and sympathy. But the thought is so unappealing that he drops it. It’s not like your death is gonna matter to other people.
After all, life sucks and then you die, right? It’s just a part of living and he’s not pathetic enough to suddenly miss you. But there’s a disgustingly hollow feeling in his chest as his thoughts ring too loudly. You’re just an NPC – aren’t NPCs supposed to live quietly in the background while the main characters get their character development or whatever? 
Why couldn’t you just quietly live your life like that?
You’re so stupid.
Alan has always felt like a monster. His hands – his stigma – have crushed so many things until they’ve become nothing but dust. He’s never been proud of this strength, not when he causes so many to cower. 
He had expected you to cower, too, especially after he ripped Takeru’s ghost apart in front of you, so lost in the bloodlust. But you hadn’t. You stood by his side with as much care and compassion you could muster. When he wanted to keep looking into the case of Takeru’s ghost even after it was considered “finished” by Darkwick, you offered to help him even though you didn’t need to.
Alan’s never really been a conversationalist, so he didn’t expect you to spend time with him unless it was necessary. Still, he can’t say he dislikes having you around. Even when he’s tinkering with his car, it’s nice to have you sitting nearby, talking about your day.
You’re someone he appreciates – someone who does their best no matter how dire the situation is, someone who strives to do better. How could he not grow fond of how hard you work on a daily basis?
“I pat people on the head a lot? Didn’t notice,” Alan had said, after placing his hand on your hair. He really hadn’t realized – it was a force of habit, especially when you had done such a good job. “I’m doing it again?” he murmured, removing his hand, “...Sorry.”
“It’s nothing you have to be sorry for,” you responded, honestly. “It was just an observation.”
Despite knowing that his hands were akin to weapons, Alan couldn’t help but be drawn to touching you. Unlike him, you were soft and sweet. Still, he felt guilty. He hadn’t ever wanted you to feel uncomfortable, after all. 
“I actually kind of like it when you pat my head,” you said. “You’re really gentle with it, so it makes it feel like I did a good job!”
Alan would never describe his touch as gentle, but he felt like he could believe it if it came from you.“You’re doing a good job.”
“Thanks!” you responded, giving him a big smile that he couldn’t say he had seen from other people. Most other people here had cunning smiles or looked fearful of him. He liked how genuine yours looked. “I can keep trying my best because of you and the others, you know? Thanks a lot.”
Alan couldn’t really recall if he had done anything to receive this type of praise from you, but your words made him feel relaxed. He felt like you helped him feel more human. “I’m lucky I’ve got you,” he said, trying to express his gratitude. “As long as you’re with me, I feel like I won’t lose sight of who I am.”
But now you’re no longer here. It makes Alan scared of himself in a way that he’s never felt before. He had treated you gently, like you were made of glass, because he was scared he’d break you. Yet you weren’t ever scared of him breaking you. Being with you softened up his edges and made him feel more human than monster.
You’re no longer here, though.
Perhaps it has always been his fate to become a monster.
Kaito hasn’t stopped crying since he’s heard the Masterpiece Newscasters relay the news of your death. It hurts so bad. 
Kaito doesn’t think he’s ever been so badly hurt in his life. 
Kaito’s never been one to like pain, which is why he avoids training and going on missions. He wants to be normal and being a ghoul is abnormal. The non-ghouls around him cement that on a daily basis. Yet you’re one of the only non-ghouls who has always treated him kindly no matter what.
Even when he’s a pathetic idiot or a stupid coward, you’ve always been so patient and kind to him. Kaito has liked a lot of girls on a surface level, but his feelings towards you have evolved beyond that. He thinks you’re pretty and lovely and all of that, of course, but more than that, he thinks you’re an amazing person. Amazingly strong, amazingly hard working – you’re someone he values so deeply. Even when he knows he’s being foolish, you’re there by his side because you care about him, aren’t you? So how could he not grow to care about you? You’re the few people that he feels he can truly be close to.
“Whoa, when did it get so late?!” Kaito gasped, looking at the window outside. You two had been baking since noon, but ended up goofing off at some point, delaying the baking process. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you…”
“I’m still good!” you responded, before taking a big bite out of your cookie. While chewing your sweet treat, you offered Kaito a piece, too.
“Really?” Kaito asked, taking the cookie you offered him.
“Yeah, I like spending time with you.”
Your words made Kaito’s heart swell with so much gratitude and affection that he wasn’t entirely sure what to do with himself. He always considered himself lackluster in practically everything, but he felt like he could do better and try to be better because you were there. He couldn’t help the cheesy grin that came onto his face.
“Oh, look, Kaito! The stars look so pretty!”
Kaito looked over at the large window in the kitchen, watching as the stars twinkled in the night sky.
“It kind of looks like granulated sugar if you squint, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, I can see it!” Kaito responded, before tentatively asking, “...Do you like stars?”
“I do,” you replied, taking another bite of your cookie. “Why d’you ask?”
“Oh, um,” Kaito hesitated, feeling a little bashful all of a sudden. You weren’t the type to just reject him harshly, but sometimes Kaito felt nervous in more intimate moments. When you genuinely seemed to return his affections (romantic or not) it made him feel valued as a human being, but it also made him nervous. “I was just wondering ‘cause there’s this place where you can see them really well, so I thought you’d want to go some time…”
“I would love to!” you beamed at him with a smile that could rival the sun. Kaito didn’t think the sun needed to shine if you were around. “You always do find the best places.”
Your words of validation made Kaito feel teary. You’d always been by his side, no matter what. You didn’t have to be his princess or anything like that. In fact, you’d saved him a lot of times before. Still… “I know I’m weak, and a coward,” he began, “But I really do want to become your knight in shining armor.”
In the end, Kaito never could become your knight in shining armor. Not when you’re gone like this. He couldn’t protect you and it tears him up inside. If he had trained and went on missions, would things be different? If so, why couldn’t the other ghouls help you instead? You deserve to be alive – you deserve it so much more than anyone else.
Kaito continues to wail inside his room, frustrated that he’s upset at other people not saving you – it’s him that couldn’t save you. It’s his fault. It’s all his fault and he’ll never be able to make it up to you.
He’ll never become your knight in shining armor.
For the first time since coming to Darkwick, Luca feels numb. He’s not sure how to cope with the fact that your death has come so suddenly. He had promised you that he’d help you absolve your curse, just like you promised him you’d help him subjugate a demon. Yet… you’re gone. You’re not here. You cannot keep your promise to him and he cannot keep his promise to you. It makes him feel hollow.
Luca has always felt that honesty was the best policy, which contributed to his straightlaced nature. He’s been called inconsiderate because of this and he’s lost people who could’ve been his friend. Him being a ghoul hadn’t helped, either, since he was the only ghoul back in Emrys Academy. When he came to Darkwick Academy, all he expected was to learn ways to subjugate a demon. Sure, it would’ve been nice to make friends, but Luca wasn’t going to get his hopes up. Not when he was so set on his goal to find his brother, at least.
Most aren’t understanding of Luca’s honesty and desire to bring back his brother, thinking his one track mind is a hassle. But you’ve never treated him like he was a nuisance. You’ve always greeted him brightly and worked with him. Whether you guys looked for information on curses and demons or practiced meditation for a clearer mind, you’ve been there.
But you’re not going to be there anymore, are you? Not when he’s meditating, not when he’s looking things up in the library, not when he needs the encouragement – you’re not going to be there.
He at least has hope that he’ll be able to bring his brother back. With you, he knows he can never bring you back. You’re gone, forever. You’ll never be there to experience anything with him anymore.
“We have experienced many joys and sorrows together since becoming friends. I’m very glad we met. I look forward to walking the road ahead with you,” Luca had said one day, while you two were meditating. While meditating, Luca couldn’t seem to clear his mind from thinking about you and all you’d done for him, so he thought it was only right for him to express it.
“Me too,” you responded, earnestly. Luca liked talking with you because you were candid with him, but patient. Even when he interrupted your meditation. “You’ve been a great ally to me, so thanks a lot, Luca.” You stretched your arms over your head, before staring at the setting sun. Sometimes, Luca wasn’t sure what went through your head.
“You’ve been a great ally to me as well.” Luca could scarcely remember people who tried as hard as you. He was duty-bound to a fault that he had trouble abandoning his mission, so he had trouble understanding people who wanted to run away. You were one of the few that came back despite wanting to run away. How could he not be impressed with you?
“That makes me glad to hear!” you replied, beaming brightly. Luca liked your smile. It radiated a warmth that reminded him of home. “Let’s keep doing our best!”
“Yes, let’s.” Luca watched as you kept your gaze on the setting sun. The soft colors of the sky were quite a sight to behold, but Luca wasn’t sure why it was distracting you.
“You know, Luca?” you called, as if you could read his mind. “They say that as long as you’re on Earth, you’ll see the same sun as the people you love. Isn’t that nice?”
Luca could be slow to pick up on things sometimes, but he wasn’t stupid. He could tell that those words were meant to console you after you’d been stripped from your family so suddenly (he’d come to understand the reasons for your desire to leave that day when you were working on your first case after many conversations with you). Yet, your words carried an undertone that implied that you told him about the sun to console him as well. Him, who was far from his family. Him, whose brother had gone missing. Him.
Those words were meant for him, but he cannot see the value in them now. Not when you’re no longer on this Earth. Not when you’re no longer alive. The sun still shines so brightly over Darkwick as if undeterred by your death. It pains Luca because time feels like it’s stopped for him, yet the world seems to move on. 
Luca closes his eyes, heart throbbing.
“I’m sorry… Yet again I have failed to protect the people most important to me…”
The first thing Tohma does when he hears of your death is smoke to calm his nerves. He’s counting down the minutes until Jin calls him, but Tohma can’t seem to shake the sudden burst of numbness that shoots through his veins.
He hates to admit it, but your death has shaken him up more than he’d like. Of course, he’ll have to hide it. He’ll have to get a hold of himself – especially since everyone else will be in a tizzy. But even though he knows this, he’s having a hard time controlling his own emotions.
You’re the only one who is stupidly earnest in everything you do, allowing him bits of amusement in his life. You’re the only one that’s helped him feel like he could forget everything he’s got to do and be. You’re the only one who tries to lift the burden on his shoulders. You’re the only one and it makes Tohma’s lungs feel empty.
What vermin had killed someone as lovely as you?
“Welcome to high society,” Tohma had said, taking your hand in his for a dance. “That outfit suits you well. With that poise, you’ll have no trouble fitting in here.” And he was right, you looked beautiful, like the belle of the ball.
“Aha, sure,” you murmured, wincing as you stepped on his foot. “Oh god, I’m so sorry! I’m still so bad at this…”
“Inexperience is not a crime,” Tohma responded, twirling you in his arms. “The important thing is choosing to not remain ignorant when you don’t know something.” While most would assume Tohma was talking about your dancing capabilities, you knew that he meant something beyond that, too. You were smart like that, after all, and so hardworking. You chose to not remain ignorant.
“You’re right.” You nodded. “I’m gonna do my best.”
“I look forward to your efforts,” he hummed. “And in times of difficulty, I hope you’ll turn to those around you for help. I will be there to keep you safe.”
Tohma takes another drag of his cigarette, watching as the smoke fills the room. He told you he’d protect you. He told you, didn’t he? And yet he couldn’t.
Perhaps a lowly servant like him could never have protected you in the first place.
At the news of your death, Jin’s first move is to slash though the expensive furniture in his room, unsure of where else to let his emotions explode. His hand tightens around his sword as he stabs his sword in the ground, visualizing whoever had the audacity to touch what is his.
How dare they hurt you? How dare they take you away from him?
You, who’s been so stupidly obedient to him without any expectation of riches or glory. You, who’s been stupidly kind to him despite his terse nature. You, who’s been by his side without complaint as long as he ordered it. 
“...I was too active yesterday. Massage me, servant,” Jin muttered, rolling onto his stomach to give access to his back. Without a word of complaint, you do as you’re told, though Jin couldn’t say you could be a masseuse anytime soon. “...What the hell was that? Put some muscle into it.”
“What? I’ve been told I give really good massages, though.”
Jin frowned. “From?”
“My dad.”
Jin snorted out a laugh. “Try harder.”
“Fine, fine,” you muttered, stretching your arms in front of you. “I’m gonna put my back into it!” Jin wondered if you’d actually be able to give him a proper massage, but the effort in itself was amusing (cute, even). Still, regardless of your massages, it was nice to have your hands on his back. He liked being close to you. “How was that?”
“It was fine.”
“What!” you exclaimed, incredulous, before grumbling, “You give a guy a massage and all he does is say it’s bad. Not even a word of thanks.”
With how you were yapping, you must’ve gotten quite comfortable with him. Jin couldn’t say he disliked it. “Never learn, do you?” he asked, rolling onto his back so that he can pull you on to the bed next to him. “I don’t take you being here for granted. I know it won’t last forever.”
Your eyes widened. “Huh?”
“That’s all I’m going to say.”
“Wha– you’re so–” you huffed, before shaking your head, seemingly pleased. “Fine, you win, your majesty. I suppose it's time for this servant to leave.” You made a move to get up, but Jin stopped you.
“I’ve got plans early tomorrow. Your house is too far. Stay here tonight.”
He still can’t forget the way you looked that night – bashful, sweet. He wanted to lock you in with him so that he could have you for as long as possible. Maybe he should’ve. He never took your existence for granted, valuing every second he’s spent with you, but when he said that he knew that your relationship wouldn’t last forever, he never thought it’d be because someone killed you. The thought makes hot rage course through his veins again.
He’s going to kill whatever bastard took you from him.
.
.
.
Faintly, your sage’s ring glows on your finger. 
It asks you a question it’s asked you many times before: “What do you desire?”
You answer the question exactly as you’ve answered it before: “I want to go back.”
The sage ring glows brighter in response.
You wake up on a train.
Your phone beeps.
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musings-ofthe-unamused ¡ 4 months ago
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To Crave and To Yearn (Tokyo Debunkers)
Pairing: Haku x Reader
Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings: Some suggestive & sexual content
A/N: Happy birthday Haku!! I think you're very giggles and kicks feet
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Ever since your mission with Hotarubi, you've been hanging around there more often. It was a breath of fresh air to have ghouls that actually valued who you were and your safety. Not to mention, their dorms were calming to be in. A true joy. You sat in the tea room, sipping on some blend that Subaru had made.
"How have you been?" Haku asked, sitting across from you. His gaze was focused on papers in front of him.
You hummed and set your teacup down. "Honestly, I want to get off campus. I feel like I'm being suffocated."
"Really?" He shuffled through the papers and picked one out. "But the campus is huge. It's odd for you to feel that way."
"I guess I want to be in the real world for a bit."
Sure, you went out to the real world during missions. But it wasn't the same. You wanted to walk around the city, go to cafes, go shopping. Like a normal person. Being surrounded by supernatural dangers constantly was taking its toll. Not to mention, you felt somewhat jealous whenever you saw Shu and Leo just leaving campus whenever they wanted and having fun. You wanted to have fun too.
"You know, a new cat cafe opened up in Tokyo. We can go visit."
You sighed and shook your head, leaning back. "It's fine. It's too much of a hassle to get a permit."
Haku frowned. "Let me handle it. I'll get the permit, take you out, and we can have fun. No missions, no ghouls."
You gave him a playful smile. "You're a ghoul, Haku."
He let out a chuckle. Despite your initial complaining, you didn't seem too closed off to the idea. It would be fun, afterall. Haku’s eyes traveled over your form. God, he wanted to be your boyfriend. He wanted to hold your hand, to walk with you to classes. He wanted to take you on dates, to see you blush. He wanted to see those pretty lips of yours to call his name, to moan, to whimper. To wrap around- 
Too far. He shook his head and gave you a lazy smile. “So it’s a date?”
"Sure, why not?" You said, chugging the rest of your tea. You stood up. "Speaking of dates, I have a study date with Kaito."
"Sure." His eyes darkened for just a moment. "I'll text you."
You were grateful for Haku. He had always been there for you since the beginning. Even when you wanted to run away, he was there by your side. You didn't even realize how much you relied on him. On his calm demeanor and his wise words. Without Haku, you probably would have gone insane long ago.
You found yourself looking forward to this outing. It would take at least a week to get the permit. That whole week, you were jumpy and excited. Everyone had started to take notice. For some reason, you kept it secret. You knew that someone would want to tag along. It wasn't as if you didn't want that… no, it was. You didn't want anyone to tag along. You wanted it to be just you and Haku. No one else. 
When the day finally came, you went to the station a bit early to meet with Haku. And to your surprise, he was already there. It was odd to see him in his casual clothes. A neatly ironed white button down, stylish forest green pants, his hair nicely styled. He looked good. You walked up to him with a smile. He turned to you, blinking. His eyes lit up as he studied you. A blush spread across your cheeks and you turned away. You sheepishly stepped closer to him.
"Hi."
"Hi." He replied, smiling down at you. "You look… cute."
You didn't know how to react and just muttered out a thanks. Haku led you onto the train and towards the bench. When you sat down, he sat close to you. His shoulder was touching yours. Okay, this vibe was definitely more than friendly. When he said it was a date, you thought it was just a joking comment. But now you were positive that this was, in fact, a date. 
Nerves washed over you. How were you supposed to act now? Your eyes traveled over to him. He was staring at you. Shit. He was staring at you. Your hands started to sweat. This was fine. Just act like you normally do. Haku wouldn't judge you. He totally wouldn't act like you're some weirdo and lose any positive feelings for you.
"Ah!" He took out his phone and opened it. After tapping the screen several times, he tilted it towards you. "This is what they sell at the cat cafe. Basically you play with the cats first then we can eat and stuff."
You leaned closer to him. The sweet and fresh scent of his cologne hit his nose. "Oh, the food looks good! Does anything catch your eye?"
"You."
"Huh?" You turned your head to look at him. His face was close to yours.
"I said that the parfaits look good."
He leaned back, putting his phone in his pocket. He turned back to the front and crossed his arms. Haku was definitely playing with you. Your face flushed red and you turned your attention back as well. Haku made small conversation on the way to the cafe. Just simple stuff. Classes, new friends, what ghouls are causing you trouble. It was like he didn't notice how nervous and flustered you were. Or maybe he did and he just didn't want to embarrass you any further.
Haku said your name loudly, causing you to blink. "The kitty wants attention."
You looked down at the kitten that was meowing in your lap, trying to crawl up your shirt. "Oh. Sorry, little kitten."
You reached down and started to pet it. You gazed over at Haku. He had a cat in his lap, purring as it nuzzled against its palm. A flash of jealousy passed through you. It wouldn't be so bad to be that cat. You looked down at the kitten and lifted it, bringing it close to your face. It licked your nose, making you scrunch it up.
"Aww, you're such a cute kitty!" You giggled.
"I think you'd make a cute kitty."
Your head whipped over to him. "What did you say?"
Haku grinned at you. "I said that cute kitty would make a good pet."
He was most definitely fucking with you. You frowned and turned away from him. "Stop teasing me."
He scooted closer to you. "Why? It's fun?"
You let out a squeal. After protectively holding the kitten against your chest, you shot him a glare. He grinned. He was most definitely enjoying this. That feeling rose up again. The feeling of wanting to tease you over and over. Until you were a begging mess, staring up at him with those big cute eyes of yours. God, he wanted you so badly.
"Shall we eat?"
You huffed but nodded. You set the kitten down and took Haku's hand. He led you over to the cafe area. Now that it was practically confirmed this was a date, you had calmed down. Only a little. There was something about Haku's teasing that had made your nerves alleviate. Besides, you trusted him. Even if this day turned out bad, you knew you two would be friends still. He wasn't the type of person to just ghost you. Well, he was a ghoul. So he would ghoul you. Yeah.
After you two ate, you spent time exploring the city. Partway through, Haku had wrapped his hand around yours. He said it was so you wouldn't get lost in the crowd, but you knew better. Your fingers were intertwined tightly with his. By the time the two of you got back on your train, you had a smile on your face that just wouldn't go away.
Haku's arm was wrapped around your shoulder as you leaned against him. You were tired but happy. It really was a much needed day out. He let out a pleased hum and pulled you closer. This was nice. This was exactly what you needed. Haku. You needed Haku.
"Thank you for doing this." You mumbled.
He sighed softly and nodded. "Of course. Anytime."
"This… This was a date. Right?'
"If you wanted it to be."
"Haku!" You scoffed and sat up. "Be serious."
He didn't like that you scooted away from him. HIs arm brought you down to him once again. "Yes. It was a date."
"Okay."
"That's all you have to say? Okay?" He snorted. 
"Yeah. It was… okay. Nothing special."
Haku rolled his eyes. "Are you teasing me?"
"Maybe."
"We can't have that."
He grabbed your chin lightly and coaxed your gaze to his. Your breath caught in your throat as he leaned in and brushed his lips against yours. It was at this moment you were glad no one else was on the train. You leaned in and pressed your lips against his. The kiss was soft, the lingering taste of sweets on his lips from the cafe food. A shiver ran down your spine as he tried to pull you impossibly closer.
This was heaven. His lip brushed against your bottom lip, asking for access. You parted your lips and tilted your head, deepening the kiss. Haku groaned and pushed you backwards until you were laying on the seats. His body adjusted so he was hovering over you, his knee pressing into you. Your mind was starting to melt. You wanted more. You craved more. Your hands traveled down to his chest.
"You have now arrived at Darkwick Academy."
The doors dinged and slid open. You could hear a hiss of disgust. "Seriously? In public?"
Your face turned a dark red as you shoved Haku off you and to the ground. Ren was standing there, his lip curled in disdain. You quickly stood up and brushed yourself off, mumbling an apology. Haku's face was dusted a light pink as he tried to hold back his laughter. After he stood, he grabbed your hand and led you off the train.
"That was so embarrassing!" You groaned, squeezing your eyes shut.
Haku chuckled. "Your expression was priceless!"
"It was your fault for getting so handsy!"
"Yeah? So you don't want to kiss me again?"
"I never said that!"
"Good." 
Haku pulled you in for yet another kiss. His hands gripped your hips as he tugged you close once again. Oh god. You were going to get addicted if he kept doing this. And for some reason, you knew that's what he wanted. Your hands gripped his shirt tightly, wrinkling the fabric. It took everything in your power to push him away.
"Wanna come over?" You mumbled, looking away. "I have tea."
"Don't mind if I do."
His arm wrapped around your waist as the two of you walked off towards your dorm. Your heart was pounding in your chest and your hands were shaking, but you couldn't be happier. Meanwhile, Ren stared out the train window as it slowly pulled out of the station. He was absolutely repulsed. Witnessing an intense makeout session was not on his list for the day.
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kurosagi-h8r ¡ 2 months ago
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Tkdb ghouls — boobs, ass, personality, or something else pt 2
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what is it called when you need to step away from your device whenever you write two sentences about Haku to keep yourself SANE. It's a disease at this point and it keeps happening when i write haku brainrot istg GET OUT OF MY HEAD *SHAKES HIM VIOLENTLY* anyways *cough* finally i got to write him here. haku, my main target, this happened because of you dude. sprinkle sprinkle
Part 2 - Sinostra, Hotarubi, Obscuary, and Mortkranken
Part 1 here
Fem bodied reader, foot fetish rui, mention of bloodplay. some of them are nsft so minors dni
Taiga
...Your entire being? Wherever he can get his teeth on??
Ok maybe both ass and boobs. Sometimes thigh especially when you're sitting on his lap during his gamble. It's like his hands just have a mind on their own. Had you not stop his hand from going further up he wouldn't even restraint himself. Does he even have any in the first place?
I feel like he's kind of into bloodplay(?) Watching his kitten squirm gets his blood rushing to his groin. The more you resist the more irresistible you are to him. Unless you made it clear to him that you don't want to scar yourself for him.
Romeo
(I'm biased) I would say he's personality guy... and after that is definitely looks. Of course what I mean by personality is not about being kind or compassionate, it's more about how you carry yourself. Be a fucking egoist; be fucking classy. But of course looks also matter because how you present yourself is how you want people to perceive you. You should treat your exterior like it’s an armor and you have to keep him in mind when you try to make yourself look good. "Will Romeo hate it? Or will he like it?"
He's a face guy.
Look him in the eye when you're talking to him, think about him when you put on your makeup, don't refuse when he wants to cum on your face, do not ever turn your face away when he's still being gentle – not when his hand is still caressing your cheek, and not grabbing your face roughly.
Whatever effort you've done for him, he should be the only one ruining it. Your tears should be there for him or because of him. Your smile should be there only when he's the one making you smile. Your anger, disgust, hatred, they’re all his to manipulate and witness to his heart's content.
Did I say your face is his favorite thing to cum to?
Ritsu
Physically, he's into ass. And don't ask me why. He love your hips too especially when he can get his hand on it. Love to see you wear pencil skirt that hugs your curve on that area.
And intelligence. If you can argue with him (in his style), the longer you stand your ground your next words are will not be going through his head but through his dick. 100%. If you win he'll say yes to bottoming for you and you know he's not one to purposely lose a battle.
Subaru
Look... eyes...
Eyes are window through the soul, in which he will gladly get lost in if they're yours. Yes, with a single touch he can get inside your head but being able to look into your beautiful orbs and wonder about what you're thinking is simply... exhilarating. To think that you're so open to him that way... so trusting... he should've present you with a ring right there and then.
He can be a bit shy to lock gaze for too long, but if you distract him with kisses on the lips he would have no choice but to not look away. Yes he will faint but who cares when your arms are there to catch him.
Haku
Lips
He loves watching your lips when he does things to you. Be it when he's making you cum or when your lips are around his cock or as simple as hearing you talk. Sure he's listening to you talking about this and that but for sure half of his focus is on the way your lips are moving.
100% would run his finger through your lips, then slowly insert a finger in as you try not to gag, and then your drool would be all over them ruining layer of lip gloss that you've put on. Is it strawberry flavor this time? Can I have the honor of tasting it, princess? Please?
Of course his favorite word on your lips would be his name, much to his denial. Calling his name like a prayer is the last thing he needs — it's what he wants, but not what he needs. He never need to be your God, he simply wish to be... Haku. Your Haku.
Zenji
Your skin is the perfectly blank canvas; your voice, scent, and soul, are the arts seeping through it. It'll be forever forgotten if Zenji – the man of quill – does not do justice on reflecting back your beauty with the touch of his lips and fingertips.
Would worship every inch of your skin if he could. He would write poems on you because you wouldn't let him bring papers to bed. With a lipstick he could either use it to write on you, or use it on him and let his mouth to the job of leaving love traces on you.
Ed
Shoulder, neck, veins– exposed veins.
He bites. Or at least planning to one day. His claws slowly tracing along your veins, soon he'll invite his own lips on you – oh so slowly like you're his long lost lover and his main focus would be to make you stay in your place for as long as he can make you.
Fantasize about leaving bite marks all over you. If you complain the next day he'll say sorry and use them as reason to kiss the pain away – just to make new ones on other places. He'll whine like a little kid being denied of his nursing time if you say no.
Rui
Greedy bastard number 2 after Haku
Lips, neck, jawline, hands, feet (ok listen i'm still on my sub!rui phase)
He can spend more time picking the perfect stocking and killer stiletto/heels than the rest of the lingerie. He doesn't give two shits on what’s up there since he can only look and nothing else. The way you can pleasure him is when he's on his knees with hands tied in the back and your heels playing with his hard cock until he's a whimpering mess.
Lyca
Scent. I don't think I should explain more. He would even find your sweat pleasing to his nose and you would have a hard time pushing him away.
Yuri
Ankles (Blame @/jeun-bug and @/istharoth for this). Well I mean it wouldn't be far off so i will not be explaining it here.
Yuri and exposed back.
Backshots.
The guy can perform autopsy like it’s a walk in the park but if you need help unzipping the back of your dress???? Yeah. Somebody please call the ambulance, the doctor is frothing at the mouth /j
Jiro
Big size difference. Whether you're the small one or the big one doesn't really matter as long as there's a noticeable gap between you and him. He's down for picking you up with one arm and also looking up during conversations.
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unhinged-simp ¡ 5 months ago
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Jin, haku, Alan, haru and Taiga with a reader who LOVES hugs but too shy to ask :3
Jin, Alan, Haru, Taiga, and Haku with a reader who loves hugs but is too shy to ask for them.
Thank you for requesting! I hope you enjoy. This one was a bit of a fun one. I do think all of them love hugs too. Alan's ended up a bit longer than anyone else. I do believe Alan's scared to touch people cause he doesn't want to kill them is mentioned briefly. I hope you enjoy.
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Jin had been your boyfriend for a couple months now, and had always instigated affection.
Due to this, you had grown a bit more shy in asking for hugs. 
During visits to Jin, you had always wanted to hug him, or cuddle with him when he's taking a nap, which you usually do if he asks.
During one such visit, you had stared at his lounging frame longing to wrap your arms around him.
He noticed the stares you’ve been giving him, and let a tsk.
“What do you want?” Jin asked. You startled at his question.
“I don’t want anything,” you nervously said. “Why do you think I want something?” Jin sighed in response.
“Just spit it out, I'll give it to you.” You gulped. I guess there was no way out of this.
“Can I get a hug?” You asked, fiddling with your fingers. Jin looked at you for a second before sitting up.
“Sure, come here.” You walked up to him, and he pulled you down on the couch with him. He wrapped his arms around you, you did the same and nuzzled into his chest.
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You had always loved the hugs Alan gave you. 
You had wanted to hug him, but you didn’t want Alan's fear of harming you to trigger.
You’d let him do the hugging on his own, instead of asking.
The problem was Alan’s hugs were few, due to him not being much of a physical person.
Soon enough you found yourself down due to the lack of hugs. 
You had headed to Vagastorm one day to hang out with Alan.
During the visit, Alan noticed how down you looked.
“What's wrong?” Alan asked, sitting beside you on the couch.
“Nothing. Nothing's wrong,” you nervously blurted out. Alan gave you a puzzled look, he'd definitely caught your bluff.
“Come here.” He patted his lap. You sat down and he wrapped his arms around you. You leaned back into him and enjoyed his warmth.
“How did you know I wanted this?”
“I saw it on your face.”
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Haru was busy with the anomalies and Peekaboo most of the time.
But when he isn’t you’d get so many hugs and kisses from him.
You started wanting hugs from him more frequently, but you didn't want to interrupt him. 
Trips to Jabberwocky become more regular, and you’d spend days thinking about being in Haru's arms.
One day, he noticed you staring at him and bolted up to you.
“Hello, Honey. You’ve been staring at me for a while, what's up?” Haru asked.
You ducked your head down, not meeting his eyes. You felt a bit ashamed for thinking about disturbing him.
“It's fine if you don’t want to talk about it, but I’m here if you want me. You can ask me anything you want, I’m never too busy for you,” Haru said. You blinked and looked up at him in surprise.
“Can I get a hug before you head back?” It came out of your mouth before you could stop it. He grinned and wrapped his arms around you.
“Of course, Honey.”
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Taiga is an enigma to you.
On some days, all he wants is you and your attention. On others he doesn’t want anything to do with you.
You always hoped the next day would be one of those attention days, and that he'd remember who you were.
You headed to Sinostra after classes ended, and entered the casino.
You spotted Taiga at one of the tables, playing a game with other students.
You walked up to the table, and stood nearby watching the game. Taiga beat them a minute later and all the other students left.
“Oh, if it isn’t the Little Kitty,” Taiga said, approaching you with a grin. He leaned close to your face.“What do you want?”
“Hi Taiga. I was just-” You were interrupted by his laughter. He grinned at you. 
“Just spit it out.” His eyes narrowed, getting rather tired of your stalling. 
“Will you hug me?” Taiga laughed again, clearly pleased at your answer. He grabbed your arm and pulled you into a corner with a chair. He sat down on the chair and pulled you into his lap.
“If that's what the Little Kitty wants.”
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Haku initiates the affection.
He's always hugging you, kissing you, and using the top of your head as a chin rest.
The problem was you only saw him occasionally.
He's almost always getting roped into Hotarubi duties.
You wanted to hug and kiss him so badly.
He saw you on lunch break and came over to you, placing his head on the top of yours.
“Hello darling,” Haku greeted you. You tried to look at him, but he had his chin on top of your head. Though the sad look on your face didn't go unnoticed by him.
“Why do you look so sad, darling?” He asked. You look up at him suddenly, hitting Haku’s head.
“I’m good, I’m good.” You said it twice, which had Haku raise an eyebrow at the statement.
“Darling, what do you want?” He asked, catching you off guard. “Do you want some attention?” You nodded, although you were surprised that he figured it out.
“You’re gonna have to ask for it, darling,” Haku teased. You inhaled and exhaled.
“May I get some attention Haku?” He wrapped his arms around you and leaned into you.
“Of course. I thought you'd never ask.”
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justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms ¡ 4 months ago
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hello! i just saw your post about Tokyo debunker ! 🫶 and I wanted to request something :
can you do haku, romeo, sho and Rui with an easily flustered reader ?
thank you ! hope it’s not a bother 🙌
Hi Anon! Thank you for your request! I hope you like the headcanons!
Fandom: Tokyo Debunker
Characters: Haku Kusanagi, Romeo Lucci, Sho Haizono, Rui Mizuki x gn! Reader (separate)
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How do the characters react when you get super easily flustered?
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Ooh, Haku’s going to have so much fun with you. He’s a naturally flirty person and that’s only going to increase when he finds out how easy you are to fluster.
Whether it’s a compliment or a teasing comment, he just loves being able to openly express his feelings and seeing you flustered is an added bonus.
I feel like Haku would never take it too far though. If you ever express discomfort, he’ll stop straight away and apologise for his actions.
He’ll also check in with you a few days later just to make sure he hasn’t made you truly uncomfortable. He does care about you after all.
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Romeo swears he’s not even trying. It must just be his natural good looks and suave attitude.
He thinks you’re kind of cute when you get flustered. Not as cute as him of course but certainly cuter than anyone else.
He likes seeing you get like that but probably won’t go out fo his way to fluster you. He’s got a lot of things to do and as much as he’d love to, he doesn’t have time.
On the other hand, if anyone else makes you flustered, he’s going to make time to chew them out. He’s the only one who can make you flustered, got that?
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I think Sho would be middle of the road with this. Sure, he likes seeing you flustered, but I don’t think he would go overboard to fluster you.
I think he’d do things a lot more subtly than the others. Whether it’s making your favourite food or complimenting your outfit, he likes making you flustered through little actions.
I feel like Sho can be pretty easily flustered as well so if you retaliate in any way, you’ll both end up flustered messes.
Sho’s also not someone who would ever take things too far. Since he’s a lot more lowkey, he’s at less risk of overstepping boundaries than the others.
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Rui’s a lot like Haku in the sense that he’s very flirty and likes seeing you flustered. I think he might be a bit more over the top with his comments.
I think he would actually be quite surprised to see how easily you get flustered by his words and actions.
But as soon as he realises how much he likes seeing you flustered, Rui’s going to somehow up the ante. He’s already flirting non stop but you’ll never get a break now.
Of course, if it gets too much, Rui will notice and back down. He’s pretty observant and he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable and drive you away.
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200 notes ¡ View notes
luxiaosh ¡ 4 months ago
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GOLDEN FLAME REFLECTED .
tokyo debunker ⎯ㅤ haku kusanagi .ᐟ
i was surprised to learn that haku's birthday takes place at hanabi taikai so quick searches, fireworks festival, fluff, happy (belated) birthday haku! ♡♡, gender neutral,
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it's a day like any other. 
that's what HAKU tells himself. 
he doesn't expect to receive a phone call from his family or for the peaceful rain on the outskirts of hotarubi to respite as any way to mark the date. but until this morning the weather continued to cry outside, wisteria petals swaying in the damp, muggy wind coming off the darkwick campus. it was like a symbol of spring's hopelessness in the warm sunlight, allowing laughter to ripple like the tide as children build sandcastles and adults relax in the shade, cooled by the wind of traditional fans and uchiwas. 
it's just a day. . . like all the others; but when one of the colorful balloons flashes above your head and the sky is enveloped in a black blanket glowing with tokyo lights on the horizon, it's clear that it isn't. 
and the date was defined as he looked at you. sweet. that's what he thought. it was sweet how that simple blue yukata hugged her small body, her hair, like the finest silk, swayed gracefully when caressed by the breeze. he teases you, saying that you could easily be undressed and hands you cold drinks so you can cool your cheeks hidden behind the fan. how sweet, cute . .
the towel spread out on a narrow stretch of unoccupied sand, steadying them with the weight of their knees and heels. you did everything and looked after it cautiously and subtly, with an irrational fear of harming him by the slightest wrong move on your part; what did haku do to make you resemble subaru so much at that moment. 
when his words, few or abundant, made evident the love – and not just provocations – that he alone had for you? almost as if an adoration of his name was given by all the phrases and pretexts created to make sure what was coming from you.
it leaves a warm feeling, a longing for more loving touch as haku runs his thumb down the back of your hand to soothe and tell you everything is going well. haku had spilled a bucket of words so you could trust him from the start and now it was his turn, wasn't it? even if this is not exactly what he wanted from you, nor is it what he imagined in his head when he demanded so much. . . even if it is speechless, there is even more meaning behind it than the gesture as intimate and different as the time the two jumped together into the void of constellations; and when you blamed the heat on your own cheeks on tokyo's summer temperature – begging once again for one of those cold drinks, the sky heated up and the first fireworks exploded.
the sound reverberated through the bones, a boom that echoed and they both choked back the joy of surprise. colors danced in the air, painting the sky with vibrant hues. fiery red, deep blue, sparkling gold. . . lights were reflected in his yellow irises, shining in a living mirror of colors – “ it's beautiful. so bright. . . ” and the words are lost when haku starts to laugh, the tears well up in eyes but you hold them. that is his day, his alone. haku gave everything he had to convince cornelius that you, subaru, zenji, rui, lyca would be safe, free, and now it's your turn to reciprocate with an enlightened scene; contained happiness, for not expecting to give and receive so much. you still have your hand stuck in his. and he promises to keep that grip and cherish you forever.
he could be the guy who stopped you from being thrown out of a train window, unpredictable and whatever you want to say; but looking at haku kusanagi, it is the lover who loses his undeniable beauty to admire that of others, and you were so determined to worship that you could not refuse to be fall in love one day.
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istharoth ¡ 10 days ago
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Lingering Presence
wc: 1.6k | fem-reader | not proof-read
Inspired by Haku's warding card!
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She stares at the crane machine in distaste. She's all for having vending machines at Onsens but a crane machine too!? That's evil and smart. She's definitely going to play until she goes broke. 
"…I lost again." She falls to her knees, weakly holding the last token while Zenji assures her she wasn't bad at the game but the machine was stingy. 
"How many have you gone for?" Subaru tilts his head in pure curiosity. The Inspector had been at it for the past fifteen minutes so it likely wasn't that much money. 
"Fifteen tries," She mumbles, looking away, unwilling to meet his surprised gaze. "But the maiden lost all of it, alas!" Zenji sighed, resting his hand on his chest, much saddened by her loss. 
"Want to play a round?" She asks, offering him the token as she stands up. "Is it okay?" He asks, staring at the token as if it were an uncommon object. 
"Yup, it's fun once you get the hang of it." She grins, moving away from the stage. She watches with a smile on her face as Zenji teaches Subaru the controls, the duo trying their best to get a plushie. Well, since she's available, she might as well get some drinks.
Carefully sliding the door open, she walks down the halls. It was mostly empty, granted it was a family-owned onsen by none other than the Kusanagi Clan. Seriously, she knew he was rich but if he were on the same level as Jin, she'd have to wonder if Darkwick only allowed rich people to enter the school. 
She lightly jumps from the veranda to the grassy field. In the night sky stars glitter across the vast galaxy. 
The full moon glowed down at her. He leans against the wooden pillar, gazing at her in fondness. "The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" Walking slowly, he appears behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist. 
"Wha-!?" She clenches her fist, twisting her body to land a punch on the perpetrator, only stopping when she figures it is Haku. "Violent, aren't we?" He grins, and retraces his arms, raising them in the air as if to signify defeat. 
"You could've announced your presence?" She questions back and he chuckles, "Guilty." Though he doesn't look guilty in the slightest. 
"Can Your Majesty please forgive this soldier who didn't know any better?" He does a curtsy and she tries hiding her bubbling giggles. "If the soldier vows to protect me, yes." He looks up at her, extending his hand towards her. She places her hand on top of his and he plants a kiss on it. 
"Now," He smiles at her radiantly, cheeks a bit flushed, "The vow can't be broken." She's done for. She's absolutely done for. She's not sure how much longer she can hide what she feels for him. 
He intertwines their hands, asking if they should head back in. She still needs to buy the drinks but she doesn't want to let go of him. She doesn't know if she'll get the chance again. "Let's go. I want to see if Subaru-Senpai got a plushie yet," She chuckles, ignoring the thumping of her chest. For now, forever she'll pretend as if it does not exist. 
When they enter the room, Zenji immediately takes Haku's attention and he lets go of her hand. She looks down at her hand, a tingly warmth felt from it. "Y/N-San, I finally got it!" Subaru appears in front of her, proudly displaying the plushie to her. 
"Woah! Congrats, Subaru-Senpai! It's so cute!!" She gushes before glaring daggers at the crane machine. "I think I might get one for Lyca," Subaru smiles, looking at the plushie and then walks back to the crane machine. 
"Heyy, don't spend too much." Haku sighs putting his hand on his hip as he watches Zenji and Subaru shoot for another plushie. "Once you start, you can't stop." She points, mirroring his actions. 
"That so?" He chuckles, taking out a small box from within his sleeves. "For you." He holds a small box towards her. In the transparent box, she could see earrings similar to his own. 
"Don't they look similar?" He points at his ear, giving her a huge grin. "When did you buy it…?" She asks, thanking him for the gift(?). 
"A while before we ate at the dango stand." He answers, asking if he could help her put them on. Nodding slowly, still a bit in shock he brought her something, she handed him the box. Opening it, he unclasped the earring and tugged at her earlobe gently. She could feel the warmth radiating from his body, she hoped he couldn't hear her heart. The ghoul senses weren't that good, were they?
It felt like minutes had passed, but it's likely only a few seconds passed since he clasped the earrings on her ears. He takes out his phone, handing it to her to look at her reflection. 
She can't take this anymore. She wants him to love her as she does. Desperately. 
Glancing at his earrings, she touches the tassel of the earring. It's as if they had bound the red string of fate themselves. Fate need not care for who they're supposed to love. Fate has no business in her love life, since she's locked hands with him, she's been his. 
"Thank you," She whispers and he hums, "Anything for you." 
It's been nearly a year since she was found in a train station. She doesn't remember what happened, except she was at a concert. However, she received news that the group had disbanded a year ago. In the year when she didn't remember anything, she returned home with only red tassel earrings. 
Just like clockwork, she reaches for the earrings. Staring at her reflection in the mirror, she watches as the triple-knotted red earring dangles. She does not recall when she brought it or why she brought it- if she did, that is. 
It appeared from nowhere and every day she had to put it on. Her entire self feels unfamiliar if she doesn't. It's reminiscent of something too, something or someone she can't recall no matter how hard she thinks. 
She lets out a shaky sigh, walking back to her bed and falling backwards. She stares at the ceiling, the fan from above showering her with cold air. She remembers nothing from the past year, but somehow there's always a dull ache when she tries to recall. Something happened, something she wished she wouldn't forget. 
"Let's get to work," She gets up from her bed, continuing her morning routine. 
Despite getting lost at a train station for a year, according to the police, she uses it anyway. There's something about the specific station in Harajuku she can't wrap her head around. It's not just in Harajuku but also on the train heading to Tokyo Bay. 
She passes through the crowd, eyes on her phone as she changes the song playing from her playlist. It's from the band she liked but they disbanded. The world feels a bit unfamiliar as if she'd seen something that wasn't accessible to the rest of the world. 
A figure bumps into her and she looks up. He looks familiar, moreover, his earrings are similar to her own. "Oh, I'm sorry." He nods as if to apologize. Before he can get lost in the crowd, she grabs onto his sleeve. He turns around, eyes widening slightly and she stares up at him. She knows him. She's well aware of his presence, but she can't figure out who he is. 
"Have we met before…?" She asks, eyes stuck on his dangling earrings. It's the same as hers. It's pure coincidence. She should accept that but for some reason, she doesn't want it to be just a coincidence. 
He smiles at her, it's familiar. It's as if he were the very thing she couldn't remember. "I'm sorry, but maybe you have the wrong person?" His guilty tone doesn't match the light-hearted expression on his face. She immediately lets go of his sleeve, apologizing profusely. Somehow though, she doesn't think she can forget this strange encounter. 
"I couldn't say it last time but," She looked up and he was already staring at her. "They look good on you." She feels her face flush up and rubs her neck in embarrassment. 
"Thank you," She should ask what he meant by the first statement but looking at the complete look of fondness in his eyes, she doesn't think she should. 
"Then, I hope we'll see each other again, Your Majesty." He turns around, mixing in with the crowd. She can feel her chest bubble in excitement. She sprints forward, attempting to find him again but to no avail. He's someone she doesn't want to let go of, someone she definitely doesn't want to forget. 
"Met up with her?" A certain grim-reper asks, leaning against the station walls. "She still wears them," Haku mumbles, hiding his face with his arm and Rui chuckles. It's hard to see Haku lovesick again. Not that he doesn't understand. The Inspector's appearance was abrupt, she left a long-lasting impression but left just as abruptly. 
Haku Kusanagi had once sworn he wouldn't fall for her again. He'd only watch from afar as she lived her life without anomalies, without ghouls. He'd be content with just that. Had he known all of this would happen, he would've confessed before it was too late. He would've had her in his arms for just longer, he should've held her hand for longer. If he did all that, then maybe they wouldn't be strangers again.
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pinkaditty ¡ 13 days ago
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Who's Passing NNN? Tokyo Debunker Pt 5
hey man. the world keeps turning and i keep waking up. im grateful!
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a/n: sorry i didn't update this series all weekend i mysteriously got sick with nausea and terrible headaches so i stayed away from my laptop most of the time. also please join me in prayer for an election recount. amen! anyways. enjoy haku and the others jacking it! quick disclaimer that i write these under the assumption the tokyo debunker boys are at least 18 years old. they appear to be present at a university considering there are professors and a chancellor. not to mention the boys drink, smoke, gamble, and refer to themselves as adults.
summary: pt 5 of the "Who's Passing NNN?" Tokyo Debunker series. i am genuinely surprised y'all like these but hey! i enjoy writing them which makes it so much better!
cw: men pulling their dicks out to rub them!!!!!! MINORS DNI AS PER USUAL!!!!!!!!!!!! again... not proofread.
Frostheim || Vagastrom || Jabberwock || Sinostra || Hotarubi || Obscuary || Mortkranken
(obscuary next... halfway through with them. enjoy!)
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Hotarubi: 
Subaru Kagami: Pass
Honestly struggled with him a little bit because of how funny it would be if he failed and writing him in a situation where he had to hold it together, but then I realized I already did that (see “He Knows”). I love tormenting submissive men but I’m gonna give him a lil break. 
He’s hard as a rock. His cock harshly presses into his pants, seeking friction and begging to be set free. Subaru, however, remains the picture of elegance - if you ignore his flushed cheeks and trembling silhouette. He was sitting alone in the hidden Hotarubi cabin, waiting to meet Haku later. He held a hot cup of tea in front of him, trying not to spill it as he slowly lifts it to his lips. He manages to gently sip at it, his fingers slipping just slightly and spilling just a little over the edges. The tea slides from his lips, past his chin, and down his neck, lightly staining the collar of his shirt. He sighs in frustration and hooks a finger over his collar, pulling it away from the tea. He only just now realizes how warm he felt, the exposure of his heated skin to cooler air giving him goosebumps. He suppresses a gasp at the feeling and readjusts his collar, placing his tea down with his other hand. Now that he was aware of the heat, it wouldn’t leave him alone. It seemed to flood his body from head to toe - flushed cheeks and neck, his body tense with heat and arousal, his blood flowing to his shameful erection. 
He wondered if he should cancel on Haku, and nearly immediately regrets the thought. That would potentially make things inconvenient for him, and he didn’t want that… But he also knew he wouldn’t be much for conversation like this. Not to mention it would be absolutely mortifying if Haku saw right through him. Subaru sighs, though it sounds more like a pleasured groan. This was a terrible predicament.
He gets a notification on his phone. Something from Wickchat. With trembling hands, he opens the message. It’s from Haku. He’s running late. 
Subaru sighs. He wasn’t sure how he was going to get through the next half hour waiting for Haku like this. Technically, he could take care of it, here… There was no one around, the rain would muffle any noise, and it’s not like this cabin is clearly visible through the trees. He whips his head around the empty cabin, as though someone would be hiding in the corners. His flush grows deeper at the thought of doing this somewhere other than his dorm, but he can’t deny the way his cock jumps at the thought of getting away with it. With his lips pressed into a thin, trembling line - he reaches for his pants, squeezing himself through the fabric. He whines, the sound more needy than intended. He slaps a hand to his mouth, going silent for a moment, his eyes darting to the windows of the small space. When he decides he’s safe, he does it again -- squeezing himself gently, trying to relieve some pressure. It isn’t long before he’s gently rubbing his palm against his tip, teasing himself. He keeps his hand clasped tight to his mouth, muffled moans and whimpers slipping through. He gently teases the head, slowly dragging his fingers up and down his shaft. He rubs his thighs together and leans forward, realizing his peak is rapidly approaching. He rips his hand from his mouth and swiftly grabs a handkerchief, pointing his cock at that as he finally bursts, a strangled moan lifting from his throat and his cum spurting onto the thin fabric. He shivers, staring at the mess, wondering if brewing another cup of tea would get the scent of his arousal out of the air. 
Haku Kusanagi: Fail
Come on. Let’s be for real. He did not try. Caught wind of the bet between Romeo and Rui and just laughed. He is not passing this shit, and he knows it. As much as I would love to write Haku getting off… I’ll make him suffer one more time.
Haku shivers, the air just a tad bit chilly on the galaxy express. Usually, these rides were quick, but unfortunately, his mission had been quite a ways away. He could expect to be here for a while. He chews on his thumbnail, tapping his foot as though to speed up time. He drums his fingers on the plush seat next to him, doing anything to distract himself and pass the time. He was good at hiding his arousal, typically, and that hadn’t changed today. But, for whatever reason, every single sensation felt more potent today. The chill of the air on his face, the slide of his shirt and collar along his chest and neck, the rush of warmth following every twitch of his impatient length - it all felt the same. Stimulating. He found himself having to blink multiple times or gently shake his head to prevent himself from getting lost in sensation after sensation. 
He sighs and leans his head back, listening intently to the gentle thrum of the hearth of the train as it smoothly coasted through the unseen anomalous pockets of space. He was glad this train didn’t rumble or thump, because if it did, it would’ve caused him more than enough friction to lose himself far quicker. 
He shifts his gaze to his half-hard cock as it continues to rise insistently. He groans inwardly, his expression twisting into a displeased look. Heat flushes through him as his cock twitches, as though noticing his attention. He sighs miserably, pinching the bridge of his nose. He was not going to jack off on this train. He’d have to wait. He was supposed to be meeting Subaru when he got back, but he really didn’t feel like showing up with an obvious boner. He’d simply have to be late, not that this boner was giving him much choice. He couldn’t even shift his attention away from it. The flush creeping up his skin made the cool air of the train that much more potent. The sweat beading from his chest makes his shirt stick to him, brushing against him more directly. His unhurried, labored breaths only quickened with every twitch. He could feel his mind clouding, slowly succumbing to the pleasant sensations, and small, soft moans escaping his lips. He keens once, feeling his cock reach full mast and form a tent, desperate as he was for release. He shakes his head, gritting his teeth and curling his hands into fists. He was not going to jack off on this train. 
He sits back upright, panting, certain his bangs were sticking to his forehead. Finally, the train makes an announcement. “Now arriving at Darwick Academy…” Haku sighs with relief, beyond ready to march back to his dorm room. He’s on his feet before the train even stops, driven blind by a need for release. He squeezes his thighs together, waiting at the door for the train to stop, shakily texting Subaru that he’d be late. 
Zenji Kotodama: Pass (Unintentionally)
He didn’t even realize it was NNN, man. To him, it was purposely abstaining from it to fuel his inspiration. Like hunger and thirst, certain sensations do go away or are dulled when you die, but intense emotions remain… desire being one of them. 
It’s harder than you’d think for a ghost to find some alone time. He’d finally finished composing his newest tune to play on his biwa, and wanted nothing more than to retreat to his own world. His newest tune had been about desire, something he felt so frequently as a ghost. A desire to live, a desire to be, a desire to connect with those around him. He also felt himself longing for physical pleasures, too. He can touch anything he wants… so long as it isn’t a living person. He just passes right through them. Thankfully, his dormmates that could see him do opt to pretend he can, but he wants to feel. He wants to touch. He wants to connect. 
Unfortunately, until that day dawned, he’d have to settle for himself, his beloved doll, and everything else. 
He’d left both the doll and his biwa out on one of Hotarubi’s may balconies, to watch the rain and the koi fish swimming in the ponds. Since Subaru knew he was “here”, he’d graciously allowed Zenji to keep a room, which he hardly uses, but is grateful for anyway. It is here that he retreats, letting the desire to touch brew into a boil. He grunts, dissatisfied, as he stalks to his bed, plopping his back onto the pillowy sheets. He groans, sinking into the bed. Despite his complicated mix of emotions, he still feels his arousal stir, feeling himself swell with the desire to touch, or be touched. He presses his lips into a thin line, welcoming the warmth as it swallows him whole. His cheeks flush and soft moans escape his lips as he imagines how it must feel; hands gently caressing his body, starting with his cheeks, then moving to his neck, gently trailing their nails across his sensitive skin, splaying their fingers wide on his chest, pressing them down hard as they pass over his nipples, moving lower, and lower, and lower… Zenji finds himself arcing into the imaginary touch, his dick twitching as though it were real. He shivers, following the insistent demand of his lower body and letting his hands trail further down his own body, hooking his thumb over his pants and tugging them down.
It isn’t long before he’s stroking his length, his desire taking hold of him completely. He throws his head back on the bed as he gently strokes himself, imagining someone else is teasing his length, taking slower strokes until they are satisfied. Zenji groans and begins thrusting into his hand, curling it tighter around his shaft. He traces his body with his other hand, touching and teasing all the places he’d like to be touched. He moans in tandem with each touch and thrust into his hand, feeling his peak reach him rapidly. He curls his free hand into his shirt as he cums, spurting his mess onto his hand and thighs. He turns his gaze down to his hand as he gently squeezes the last few drops out of himself. He’d have to keep settling for this.
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a/n: caught my ass genuinely drooling as i was writing haku's part man im cooked. like!!! haku!! come to the old chapel... i'll totally give u head brew u some tea!!!! (tbh either way works he's so cute i just wanna spend time with him)
siiiiighhh anyways note that i appreciate likes, comments, and reblogs!!!! please tell me how much you enjoyed this! it means a lot to know you guys like my writing!
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kemis-world ¡ 1 month ago
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Started playing Tokyo debunker last night I turst this guy with my life. Am i doing something wrong chat?
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he4rtiz ¡ 2 months ago
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[𝐣𝐞 𝐭'𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞 ⋆ 𝐣𝐞 𝐭'𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞]
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or, haku comforts you in his own unique way
pairing: haku kusanagi x f!reader author’s note: first fic in i don’t know how long and my first fic for tokyo debunker, everyone cheers! this fic is quite comical... at least for me lol to be honest this fic was born out of my love for haku, he and his flirting got me sick!!!! i demand more scenes in which haku flirts with mc!!!!!! possible ooc!haku but bear with me pls
english isn't my native language!
Your days at Darkwick Academy were never boring enough, not when every single ghoul and staff member was able to double down your already tiring and tedious workload. 
Your days spent running from house to house, from task to task, without even being able to take a small break.
Today wasn’t different from usual. Your day started with helping Kaito with his remedial classes, then you gave Sho a hand with Highway to Home, only to then sprinting towards Jabberwock to stop Towa from striking down an anomalous creature who accidentally hurt Haru, to then team up with Haru to bring Ren back to Jabberwock.
Cue said fugitive yelling about you and that clown not understanding the basic concept of boundaries.
Of course, your day wasn’t even far from being done. Your lunch break was cut short when you received a lovely call from Romeo, and between all the acronyms he yelled, you only understood that BTH, aka Sinostra’s famous troublemaker captain, was up to no good. 
You had just a minute to say goodbye to the delicious food Sho gave you, unceremoniously left on the table half-finished.
And there you were, sprinting towards Sinostra to avoid explaining to the Chancellor how in the hell the Darkiwick Academy population decreased in a few minutes. And why it was always Sinostra’s fault.
Not even the time to breathe, that you found yourself on Jiro’s shoulder as he and Yuri, who didn’t forget to remind you that he was a busy man, and he didn’t have time to play hide and seek with you, went straight to Mortkraken for your daily medical visit. Your fault? Forgetting about said medical visit.
At least you were able to relax a bit, until your phone rang up for the nth time, and it was Frostheim captain’s turn to call for your help, or in other words, giving you some tedious task he considered boring. 
Great, you were not done yet.
Maybe it was time to create a trade union with the cats and demand less work hours…
You were done for the day, at least until your phone rang up once more. 
Sitting on a bench with your eyes closed, your body relaxed under the gentle breeze of the night, a sigh of relief left your lips, you survived another hellish day, at least it wasn’t as bad as others. Luckily this time, you didn’t have to run and miss Romeo’s bullets as he tried to hunt you and Kaito down, all because the blonde still hasn’t paid his debt.
Tired and hungry, you groaned, your eyes opening to find the moon, half-moon to be more precise, shining all alone, as no stars were around.
You and that moon were so similar; the moon shining all alone in the dark night, and you alone in an academy full of ghouls and trying to find a cure to your curse.
Suddenly you felt the presence of someone, and before you could realize what was happening, a bag was dropped on your lap.
“There you are, [Name].” A familiar voice said, a so gentle one compared to the ones you were used to, and you realized who the voice belonged to. It was Haku.
“Why so surprised? You weren’t expecting me, how cruel~” He joked as he sat down next to me.
“Haku-san! Why are you here? Is everything alright at Hotarubi? Ther-” Haku stopped before you could say more.
A light frown adorned his face, as his finger was gently silencing your rambling, before with his other hand gently flicked your forehead. 
“You worry too much about the others. You should learn to focus first on yourself and then take care of us. We may look helpless to you, but we aren’t.” He scolded you, his expression still serious.
You whined a little, your fingers massaging your forehead. It was the second time that Haku flicked your forehead, it seemed his favourite scolding method.
 “I am… I am sorry.” You murmured “I will focus more on my well-being…”
He nodded before he pointed to the bag on your lap. “I brought you some food, with all that running you did today, I am sure you’re more than hungry. I bought everything from that first-year’s truck. The one from Vagastrom.”
Your eyes shined brightly after opening the bag, Sho’s food was a fricking God’s gift after a long and tiring day. 
“W-What!? Thank you so much, Haku-san!” You grinned as you happily ate your dinner. Haku, on the other hand, just chuckled at your grin.
You were so hungry that in a flash, the once full of food bag was now empty. As per usual, the food Sho cooked was delicious. 
“Thank you again for the food, Haku-san. “ You thanked him sincerely, a shy smile on your lips, you always felt in debt with him, he was always there whenever you need him. Even the small gesture of buying your dinner, that for many would be seen as something small, for you was a silent message, a gesture meaning he was always there to give you a hand when you were feeling down or in need of help. 
Pushing a strand of your hair aside, you turned towards him, smiling shyly. His presence was charming enough that even a simple smile from him, was enough to fluster you.
“Haku-san… Sometimes I think you like spoiling me, you’re always with me when I am in troubles. You always lend me your shoulders, and you always hear me out. I don’t know how to thank you enough. I am so glad to have you by my side.” You confessed, your eyes now on your lap, trying to hide your flushed expression. 
A pregnant silence fell, you slowly realized that your words might sound like a confession of a sort. Panic flew in your body as you furiously tried to explain yourself, and embarrassment blossomed on your face.
“H-Haku-san, i-it’s not like that! I-I didn’t mean to… I mean… I didn’t wan-” He just chuckled, shaking his head, his fingers running through his hair as he looked at your flustered reaction.
“You’re something else, [Name].” He snickered “Spoiling you…” He muttered, before a sly smile unfolded on his lips.
“You know… “ He began “I don’t mind spoiling you, and if you really feel guilty you can always marry me. Then you won’t worry about being spoiled.”
Oh my god…
Oh my god…
You were sure now you were blushing like crazy, how could he say something like that with that nonchalance?!
“H-H-Haku-san!” You whined out, jumping on your feet, your heart pounding furiously, almost leaping out your rib cage.
The Hotarubi vice-captain maybe took pity of your flustered state, as he got up too, his hand ruffling your hair.
“Take your time, my offer is always up~” He teased, winking.
You prayed that God took mercy of you and made you disappear immediately.
“C’mon princess, don’t stay there, I will escort back you to the chapel. And on our way back, you can always think about my offer~”
He was going to be your death, in one way or in the other.
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somniumfaults ¡ 2 months ago
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Hi! I just read your omega fic of Leo, Towa, and Haku. I was wondering if you could do one of them as alphas instead where they help you through your heat? It was literally the only thing on my mind the entire time I read it. Thank you! 😊
sorry for the delay!! Here's some alpha Leo, Towa, and Haku helping you through heat! :D in hindsight as I paste this into tumblr and read over what I wrote... Maybe I have a thing for crying? 😭
Sorry for any typos! I had to type this out on my phone bc my laptop is getting fixed :\
UPDATE: edited Sept 18th, 2024 for typos
omega vers here!
WARNING: NSFT under the cut!
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Alpha Towa
Oh, he would have 100% be more possessive of you if you were the one going through heat. Don't get me wrong, he would probably love exhibitionism and showing you off when it's his rut, but it's a whole different ball game when you're the one smelling that good and tempting every alpha in vicinity. You won't be leaving Jabberwock under any circumstances until your heat is over. He's the only one who will get to see your fucked-out, crying expression as you fall apart on his dick or fingers from how overwhelmed you are. Never let it be said he left your needs unattended... Put simply, he's clingy (and wants so much cuddles), and even when things are said and done, you can be certain you aren't stepping out of that room until you're smelling exactly like him.
On the flip side, despite having an insane libido to rival an omega in heat (RIP you when he's in rut), during the moments in when he's not absolutely demolishing you with his dick, he's extremely sweet and fusses over you to the point of being overwhelming. If you aren't the happiest Omega on campus, it will be raining that night. He'll be feeding you the sweetest fruits he can find all while trying to cuddle you with his dick still in you if he can get away with it. You have to be careful not to look too fussed over anything or else he will read it as him doing something wrong and try to rectify it in the most excessive way possible.
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Alpha Haku
Haku is in many ways the same as if the were an omega. He tries to have restraint, really. He probably takes suppressants for his scent and/or to help control when his rut is. If there's anything he doesn't want, it's to be caught unaware like that. He's also well aware that it's not healthy to repress his body's needs like that though, so what better way to make sure he takes care of that than to knock out your heat and his rut at the same time? Honestly, the amount of self-restraint he can show towards you even then is admirable.
As he waits for his rut to set in, all attention is on you. His hands on your hips trailing down to your legs, tucking himself between them so he can press kisses against the fat of your thighs. It's sweet... until he decides to make a move. He's not the type to be afraid to eat you out and make sure you feel good, and that's absolutely what he does. With both his hand and mouth being put to work, it would be any wonder if you weren't screaming his name and grasping at the sheets or his hair for dear life. Well, for as long as you can get his name out anyway. Despite being ever such the gentleman and prince charming, Haku does so love to see you fall apart for him. The messy look of tears tripping down your face as you sob and gasp for breath... To him, you're gorgeous like that. You're perfect. Beautiful. So good for him.
And well, his self-restraint can only last for so long. Especially with your scent starting to suffocate him as you fall further into your heat, desperation and depravity teasing him until there's nothing else on his mind but to bury himself in you. Rest assured, your thighs will be burning by the time both of you are done with your respective hormones. He'll be railing you in every position the both of you can think of, but especially any ones where he can stare and admire at just how beautiful you are when you're taking him do well.
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Alpha Leo
If you're relying on Leo to help you through your heat, rest assured it's going to suck (in the best possible way ofc). Leo is nothing if not a tease, and this isn't going to change just because you're a sad little omega in heat. Asking him to be the one to help you is nothing short of an ego boost for him, because of course you'd come to him. Who else could possibly know how to ruin you like he does, hmm? He'll push and push your limits until you can't take it anymore, and only then will he finally indulge you in what you really need — his knot. Sure, he'll come to your room and lock the door behind him, but you'd be silly to think he would just show up and fuck you.
He's going to sit there and watch you desperately try to take care of yourself in whatever way you can first, whether it's with your fingers or toys. Put on a pretty little show for him if you're so desperate, omega. If you don't have any toys on hand already, don't worry. He'll make sure to bring along anything he wants to see you tormented with. Say "thank you" ❤️
When his own self-control starts to wane, maybe he'll finally deign you worthy of his touch... maybe. He'll look at your teary eyes and make you beg to have his dick in your mouth, even if he clearly wants nothing more than to fuck it himself. If you're good and he's feeling nice, maybe he'll even touch you while he does it too!
Eventually, once you're exhausted and desperate, hair plastered to your face from sweat and tears, he'll give you what you needed from the start. Neither of you will last long by this point, but you'll be damned if the relief doesn't hit hard. And as an added bonus, he'll make sure to have a nice warm bath drawn up for the both of you afterwards. God knows after all that you won't have the energy to walk.
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kurosagi-h8r ¡ 2 months ago
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i've mentioned ghouls who would look good crying now i wanna tell you which one who are most likely to have dacryphilia
ooc warning,, perhaps??
Haru LISTEN,,,, yes he might panic a little when seeing you cry and go "h-here you can pet peekaboo! see? he'd get sad if you gets sad :(" but is that also not a chance for him to score something??? your heart maybe?????? Haru calming you down with ulterior motives... "There, there, honor student... you're too pretty to be wasting your tears, y'know? Come. Let's get you to the safari. Seeing my children will surely make you feel better." and in his mind he's already picturing how good your tears would look reflecting the starry sky of Jabberwock.
Leo for him it's more like seeing you being all pathetic and stuff. the power difference, pretty self-explanatory. i did say he'd be a pretty crier but at the same time would go out of his way to make you cry until he gets bored with your sobbing.
Haku at this point im always painting him as a manipulative flirt and im scared it's getting ooc BUT IM BIASED IM SORRY i want this man carnally just like anyone else and i think it's messing with my brain 😭 WELL— *cough* for haku,,,,,,,, uhh it's rather simple. bcs when you cry he gets a chance to score some just like haru but with haku it's like an easy access to comfort you through hugging. i think he's a type to kiss your tears away with both hands cupping your face as he towers over you. he'd whisper sweet nothings in your ears to get you to stop crying because even though he feels like he's winning he also feel bad for finding your tears cute. you being sad is equal to more chances of him being your hero of the day. cuddling, being your therapist, being your source of comfort, overall being your helper bcs if he's not doing anything to ease your pain he's going to think he doesn't deserve to be in your presence at all.
Ed For food. And also entertainment. "Oh you sad little human... I heard that sharing your burden can make you feel better. I just happen to be Rui's personal therapist, so I don't see why I can't be yours too. Don't be shy, come closer and talk to me. You can cry as much as you want. I will even lend you my lap, dearest." So he can lick your tears after. You can already hear Rui complaining in the back lol.
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aayakashii ¡ 3 months ago
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"Have you ever thought of marriage?" Haku asks bluntly.
You blink, taken aback by the suddenness of his words.
"What kind of question is that?" you huff out a laughter, wiping your dusty kitchen's counter to keep your hands occupied, otherwise he'd see the way you'd clench your fingers.
However, you still touch your bare ring finger with your thumb.
You see Haku shrug from the corner of your eyes. "Just something I thought of asking."
You hum, slowly dragging your trusty old rag over a spot that was already free of stains and dust, in order to keep your eyes fixed anywhere but him. You think something you're not ready for might happen if you look into his eyes.
"Do you want the simple answer or the honest answer?"
"Is there a difference between them?"
You nod.
"The honest answer, then."
You clear your throat. You turn your back towards him and rummage through your cabinets, looking for nothing at all. A tightness in your throat is the warning sign of a dam you wish not to break.
"I used not to care about it. Didn't feel like it mattered." you murmur, not very confident in the stability of your voice.
"But...?"
"But after the curse, I... Things were put into perspective. I started thinking about mundane things, like marriage. Since I might... since I might not be able to get married, I began thinking about it. What would it be like."
You bite your bottom lip hard, willing the tears that threatened to pool in your eyes to go away.
Haku chuckles and it sounds bitter. Tired.
"We do love to think about things we can't have, don't we?"
You will yourself to turn around to see what kind of expression he was making, but you quicky wish you didn't.
You see longing, desire and despair swirling on his amber eyes like his love is water and he's oil. Meanwhile, you're a third, rotten element that needs to be contained, far far away from him. Because you do. And soon enough, you might have to.
You stand before him. The kitchen counter that stands between you two could very well be an endless ocean, and the distance would feel the same.
"Interesting how we only wish to be normal when we lose all normalcy, huh?" he asks, a crooked smile upon his face as he rests his head on one of his hands.
You wonder how long he has felt like this. Did it begin to feel worse after he met you? Does he think of you in white and in flowers just like you think of him standing on an altar when you can't sleep at night?
You place the palm of your hand on the counter, closer to him, yet afraid to touch. You can't touch. You can't taste happiness only to have it pried from your hands afterward.
"I wish I could be normal with you." you blurt out, but the embarrassment doesn't come. You know these words just cut a deeper wound inside the both of you.
His breath hitches, and he looks down at your hand, swallowing hard.
Haku runs his index finger over your ring finger, painfully gentle with the ghost of a touch. And he whispers, more to himself than to you.
"So do I."
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unhinged-simp ¡ 5 months ago
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Hello! If you don't mind writing angst, I have a request for you: Jin, Alan, Ren, and Haku finding out the reader has a crush on someone from their dorm, but it isn't them. It's an NPC. Thanks in advance if you write this
Jin, Alan, Ren, and Haku with a reader who has a crush on someone else
Yes of course! I love angst! Thank you so much for requesting. I hope you don't mind that I used Haru in Ren's part due to Jabberwock not having general students. I hope you enjoy it!
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He heard about your crush on someone in Frostheim through Tohma, and how you were going to confess to them.
Jin thought it was himself, due to the fact that you had been visiting more and helping him out.
He would call for you more afterwards just wanting to be with you, and wanting to give you a chance to confess.
Jin would grow increasingly bothered every time you came but didn’t confess.
His attitude turned more and more sour as the days went by, making the students of Frostheim more anxious.
Jin decided to take a walk to clear his head one day, where he witnessed a scene he couldn’t forget.
You walked up to some general student. You held a bouquet of flowers, and there was a nervous smile on your face. The student turned and greeted you. 
“I have something to tell you,” you said.
“What is it?” 
“I like you, please go out with me.”
Jin left with a tch, but he slowly left the scene. He walked out onto the balcony and pulled out a cigarette. He gripped the balcony hard enough to see the white on his knuckle. He sighed and wiped one stray tear.
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Alan had heard the news that you had a crush from Vagastorm from Leo. He listened as Leo went on and on about how the crush may have been him.
Alan was quick to shut him down, although part of him was happy that you may have a crush on him.
He'd see you around both at the Vagastorm dorm and at school, where he’d lingered a bit too long in your company.
Alan’s hope became less and less, as you continue to treat him the way you have been.
Nothing really seemed to change, as Alan masked the hopeless feeling he was feeling.
Everything came to a head when he saw you approaching a general student.
You jogged up to a general student. You were quite fact that day, dressed up as best you could in your uniform. You held a bouquet of flowers in your hands. You held out the bouquet to them.
“Please go out with me?” You said.
Alan didn’t hear the response, and quietly left the scene. He was more reserved than usual. When he got to his room, he slid down to the floor and buried his face in his hands.
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Ren was passing by when he heard you talking to a random student. He heard you tell them that you had a crush on someone from Jabberwock.
He quickly assumed that he was the one. Because to him, nobody would like Haru because he's a stalker, and Towa was creepy.
He felt a bit of pride due to the fact that you liked him, or at least he thought so.
It also didn’t help that you visited the diner more, though you were with Ritsu. 
After those meetings your stops slowed down, and you stopped coming. Ren’s hope had all but diminished.
It all came crashing down when he saw you with Haru.
You had come up to Jabberwocky fancier than you usually are. Flowers in your hand as you walked up to Haru. He greeted you with a smile and a pose.
“Haru, will you go out with me?” You asked. 
Ren stared in disbelief. He had been wrong this whole time. You didn’t love him, you loved that stalker? How?
Ren went back into the Jabberwock dorm and into his room. He pulled his blanket over his head and opened his phone. He scrolled through it while trying not to cry. 
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Haku also overheard you talking with a friend. He was intrigued immediately, you had a crush on someone in Hotarubi. 
Haku thought for a bit about who it could be, Subaru was a likely candidate, but you probably don't like him like that. You didn’t know Zenji too well, so that's probably unlikely. Maybe it's me.
Haku would meet you up with more than he had. After all, he had to know, especially if it's himself.
He starts picking up on how much fun you're having with him. All he's thinking is that you could potentially like him.
He makes more flirty remarks than he used to but he just wants to see your reaction to them.
All his questions were answered and his heart was broken on that one day.
You walked across the stable wooden walkway into Hotarubi. You quickly spotted the student you were here to see. You presented the general student with the flowers you brought. 
“I’m in love with you, please go out with me.”
Haku stared at the scene for a moment, his smirk not leaving his face. He walked away with a sigh.
“So that's who they meant.”
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justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms ¡ 2 months ago
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Witches and Ghouls - Hotarubi Edition
This was originally requested by Anon who asked: "How would to Tokyo Debunker characters find out about and react to a Witch! Reader?"
I had to split it up into a few sections, separating the boys by their houses so here's the next part. The links to all the others are below. I hope you like the headcanons!
Fandom: Tokyo Debunker
Characters: Subaru Kagami, Haku Kusanagi, Zenji Kotodama x gn! Reader
Frostheim | Vagastrom | Jabberwock | Sinostra | Hotarubi | Obscuary | Mortkranken
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You're a witch! And even though the characters have made deals with demons themselves, they might have some surprising reactions.
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Subaru knows first hand the signs that someone’s keeping a secret. But at the same time, he’s not going to pry. He’ll find out when you tell him.
He’ll take it pretty well all things considered. I don’t think he’d feel particularly betrayed, especially not if he’s keeping things from you as well.
He’s always done his best to keep an open mind about accepting people who are seen as “different” and you’re no different, especially if he’s in a relationship with you.
If anything, I think he would really like that you’re a witch. He likes the idea of bringing your powers into a more domestic situation and normalising it in his life.
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Haku’s very observant so I think he’d figure it out pretty fast on his own. But he won’t tease you about it like he would other things.
He knows people keep things like that secret for a reason and he doesn’t want to scare you if you think he’s going to use his knowledge as blackmail.
Once you know he’s aware of your witchiness, he’s still going to be pretty chill. It won’t really change much other than you can help him out with quelling spirits.
Much like Subaru, he’s quite open minded and, especially because you’re someone he cares about dearly. Being a witch is just a quirk of yours.
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I think Zenji would find out when you’re one of the few people who can see him. As soon as he found out he wasn’t invisible to you, he’s going to demand to know how.
And he’s absolutely over the moon to find out you’re a witch! Sure, he’s a bit scared of ghosts and spooky things but you’re not spooky. You’re cool!
If your witchy powers let you touch him or interact with him in any way other than just talking, he’ll be delighted. It’s so nice having some variety in his life.
He’s definitely going to compose some songs about you. Poor Haku’s going to have to listen to him wax poetic even more than usual.
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badboydevotee ¡ 2 months ago
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Fading Stars, Lasting Light
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The chill of December crept through the corridors of Darkwick Academy, wrapping around Haku like an unwelcome shroud. He shuffled through the familiar halls, each step heavy with the weight of memories. This place, once a sanctuary, now felt like a prison. He remembered the first time he saw you, your eyes wide with confusion as he offered his hand to guide you through the chaos. You were fragile yet fierce—a spark in the darkness threatening to consume them both.
"Hey, Haku," he whispered to himself, shaking off the memories. "You need to focus."
Haku settled onto his favorite bench beneath the towering willow, its branches swaying like ghosts in the biting wind. It was your spot, a refuge where you shared secrets, laughter, and a connection that transcended the confines of this place. But now, it feels desolate.
Every night, Haku replayed the moments leading to your demise. The day you finally surrendered to the curse that haunted you since your arrival at Darkwick. He had watched helplessly as the light in your eyes dimmed, your laughter fading into silence. He thought he could save you. He thought their bond was strong enough to combat the shadows.
You had come to him, seeking solace when the weight of your impending doom became unbearable. "Haku," you had said, voice trembling, "if they can’t find a cure... please, just end it before I become one of them."
The choice loomed like a specter: let Darkwick Academy continue searching for a cure, or take your life before the curse turned you into a Flower Anomaly, the very thing that had cursed you in the first place. "I want to die as a human," you pleaded, tears brimming in your eyes. "Promise me you’ll do it before it’s too late."
The weight of that decision crushed Haku. Panic rose in his chest as he shook his head, desperation filling his voice. "No, we can find a way! We’ll figure this out together!" 
But deep down, he knew the truth. Time was running out, and with each passing day, the curse crept closer, threatening to claim you as its own. He saw the toll it took on you, the moments of clarity slipping further away. 
“Haku,” you whispered one night, your voice barely above a tremble. “I can feel it taking over. Please, don’t let me hurt anyone. Just do it.”
The night you slipped away, Haku had stayed up, just as you both had done countless times before. They talked about dreams, futures that now felt like a cruel joke. He poured out his heart, trying to assure you that hope remained, that the academy could help you break free from the chains of despair. But as the stars faded, so did you.
Now, he was left alone, haunted by the echo of your laughter, the warmth of your presence, a ghost that lingered in the corners of his mind. "How do I move on from all that I knew?" he asked the empty air.
In the aftermath of your absence, Haku threw himself into his tasks. He helped Subaru with his tasks and tried to guide Zenji through his chaotic video work, but every act felt hollow. His heart was a shattered vessel, lost in a sea of what-ifs and could-have-beens.
Each day, he would return to that bench, clutching the flute you had gifted him—a simple wooden instrument, now a reminder of everything he had lost. He would play, hoping to summon your essence from the ether, the melodies weaving through the night like threads of memories.
But each note only echoed his pain, the haunting refrain of a world without you.
It was during one of those nights that a familiar warmth enveloped him, a fleeting touch on his shoulder. He turned, half-expecting to see your smile, but there was only darkness. He closed his eyes, allowing memories to flood over him—your laughter, your kindness, the way you fought against the inevitable.
"Haku," your voice whispered through the wind, a soft caress. "You don’t have to bear this alone."
Tears streamed down his face as he realized the truth: he couldn’t change the past, but he could honor your memory by living. He had to be someone worthy of the light you brought into his life, to ensure that your sacrifice wasn’t in vain.
In the weeks that followed, Haku found solace in the friendships he had forged. He still missed you with every fiber of his being, but he started to embrace the future you had dreamed of together. He poured his heart into helping others at Darkwick, reminding himself of the purpose you both had sought to create.
As winter melted into spring, the warmth of the sun began to seep into his soul. And while he would never forget the ache of losing you, he learned to carry your spirit within him—a guiding light in the dark.
The last note of his flute lingered in the air, a promise to you. He would keep fighting. For you. For them. And as the flowers began to bloom, he knew that love, even in loss, was a force worth embracing.
Inspired by the song: Someone to You by Matt Hansen
Ao3 vers.
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