#tj: me. thinks this would be quick and short-- | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kumkaniudaku · 3 months ago

Text

Stay A While

Summary: Terry's back home and trying to make amends with an old friend.

Pairing: Terry Richmond x Black!OC

Word Count: 3,944

Part: 1 of ??

Warnings and Notes: None. This one's a safe for work slow burn. Enjoy.

Drunk minds speak sober thoughts. Or at least Terry hoped that was the case as his thumb hovered over a familiar name in his contact list. A dingey hole in the wall became a haven on the tail end of his journey back to some sense of normalcy. He was down a bike, a truck, and a piece of his heart but continued to press on until fatigue forced him to stop for rest. The owner, a small woman with a big voice noticed his rough appearance as he passed by on foot and invited him inside to duck an incoming storm. She wouldn’t take no for an answer, even when he repeated that he had ground to make up before nightfall.

When she asked if he needed help he politely and foolishly declined all but a glass of brown liquor and access to an outlet. That same whiskey and a sprinkle of Motown-era love songs playing on a rickety jukebox had broken a grown man down enough to reach out to the one person who might still be willing to take him in. Even if only for a night.

Searching for extra courage, Terry took another sip of lukewarm Jack Daniels before tapping his phone screen. The line rang once, twice, and then a third time before a short pause signaled the call had connected.

The silence on the other him was loud, forcing him to speak up first.

“Hello?”

Fading voices and shuffling in the background were the only indicators of a presence on the other line, making Terry feel embarrassed for starting a call in the first place.

He cleared his throat before speaking again. “Hey, look… if now’s not a good time I ca -”

“Terrence? Did you mean to call me?”

“I, uh…yeah. I did. I’m sorry. I should’ve -”

“Are you okay? It’s loud wherever you are. You good? You hurt?”

“I could tell you if you would give me a chance to answer,” he chuckled. His amusement made her kiss her teeth in annoyance. “I’m okay. I’m a little banged up, but I’ve seen worse. I’m somewhere between Charlotte and home. Stopped in this spot for a drink and somewhere to sleep for the night.”

“And what does that have to do with me?”

Terry took another swig of whiskey and sighed. “Nothing, really. I was hoping I could see you, though. You know, when I make it back tomorrow.”

“You staying anywhere when you get here?”

“Not yet, but I’ll find somewhere. I know how to survive.”

“TJ…,” More silence. Thick. Long. Full of tension and years of baggage that they had yet to discuss. The other voice sighed before answering. “Come on by. I’ll have the back room ready for you. You need toiletries?”

Terry’s face softened into a near smile at the invitation. “Yes ma’am. A meal would be nice, too.”

“Okay. I’ll have you something if you can get here before dark tomorrow. Please be safe, Terrence. I mean it.”

Before he could attempt to extend the conversation, the call ended, leaving her contact photo in full view. Terry allowed a slow grin to spread across his face just as a short text with her address came across the screen.

“Another round, brother?”

Terry looked up from his phone to find an expectant expression on the bartender’s face. He shook his head and reached for the wallet in his back pocket. “Nah, but thanks, man. Think I’m gonna close my tab, actually. I gotta see about a bus ticket before it’s too late.”

“If you heading to her,” the man started, pointing toward Terry’s phone. “you need a cut, man. A lineup. Something. You look like what you been through. If you got $20, I can get you right.” A slight frown and knitted eyebrows in response made the bartender shoot his hands up in surrender. “I don’t want no problems, big dog. I just know what it’s like to see your lady after a hard time. Let me help you.”

A quick look into the black mirror of his cell phone screen forced Terry to reckon with his appearance. He couldn’t remember his last haircut and his mustache was starting to dwarf his upper lip. He sighed and reached into his back pocket.

“Extra $10 and you can get the face too?”

“Extra $20 and I’ll get you where you going myself.”

------

City noise had long been replaced by suburban quiet by the time Terry’s destination came into view. His friend back at the bar was true to his word and arranged transport that turned a 6-hour journey into 2 hours of UGK on the speakers, a little privacy, and AC on the hottest summer day so far.

After exchanging pleasantries and cash, Terry stepped out of the cramped Honda onto the smooth driveway pavement. Every house, street sign, and front yard looked exactly as he remembered them, bringing mixed emotions forward.

The short journey to her front step felt arduous for his tired legs, but he persisted until he was mere inches from the front door. He lifted his arms and prepared to knock but stopped short when it swung open unexpectedly.

“Knocking when I can hear those heavy feet from a mile away is courteous but unnecessary.”

He chuckled and rubbed a hand down the back of his head. “Good to see you too, Treece.”

Patrice greeted him with a half smile as she studied his appearance from toe to head. A few years and a little extra weight had done wonders. She settled on his eyes and softened her gaze. “You look good, TJ. Come in here and cool off.”

Stepping inside her home felt like walking into a time capsule. He’d spent so many after-school days and summer nights here that it felt like his childhood home not too far up the road. Photos from yesteryear lined the walls on the way to the living room where nothing had changed except new furniture and a bigger television on the TV stand. The heat from the oven mixing with a slight chill from the air conditioning unit kept the room comfortable enough to nap if he could settle for more than a few minutes.

Terry’s eyes drifted from his surroundings to Patrice as she led the way. Long braids covered the back of a high school t-shirt and jean shorts. Her brown skin had become golden under the North Carolina sun, making her glow a little in the morning light. Grown woman weight had settled onto her once thin frame, transforming her into a more of a mini version of her mother than before. All the changes he’d imagined when he had a free second were ions better in person.

Patrice gestured toward the leather recliner in the corner without speaking, inviting him to take a seat and settle in on her way to the stove.

They existed without words for a few minutes while she took fresh biscuits out of the oven and arranged them next to sausage patties and an omelet on one of her good porcelain plates. Terry trained his attention on his shoes, trying and failing to find a way to break the ice. He wanted to apologize. Confess his wrongs and desires in one grand speech designed to erase nearly ten years of absence. But the words wouldn’t form in his throat and the moment came and went.

Balancing a dinner tray in one hand and orange juice in the other, Patrice carefully made her way to his spot in the living room. Seeing her kind eyes calmed his nerves and set his chest ablaze.

“No more pork for you, right? This is chicken sausage from my Nana and them in the country.” She asked as she sat the tray on his lap.

He nodded in appreciation. “Yeah. You remembered?”

“You ain’t been gone that long, TJ. I still know who you are and what you like. That orange juice don’t have pulp in it either.”

“Thank you,” he said sheepishly before hanging his head to pray.

“Any time.”

A re-run of A Different World became the only sound in the room outside of an occasional content sigh from Terry as he tore through his breakfast. Patrice watched in amusement until her broad smile caught his attention. He slowed in embarrassment and returned the stare long enough to induce loud laughter from both of them.

“I look crazy, huh?”

“No,” she assured with a sweet smile. “You just look like you're happy to be back home, is all. Fayetteville missed you.”

“All of Fayetteville or someone specific?”

“Don’t start, TJ.”

“I’m only asking a question.” He answered without making eye contact. “You know you’re the only one who still calls me that?”

“What? TJ? That’s your name.”

“Yeah, but…you know. It’s not 2010 anymore.”

Patrice shrugged and settled deeper into the couch. “Considering that’s about the last time I saw you in the flesh, I guess it stuck for me. But, I can call you Terrence if you like.”

“Nah, TJ’s good. I like it. From you…specifically.”

The pair exchanged equally bashful looks, both too shy to say anything that would incriminate themselves. Instead, they watched the television in silence and stole looks until a commercial break took away their distraction.

Without speaking, Terry began to gather dishes and stand, prompting Patrice to rush over before he could move too far.

“Treece, I can do it.”

“I know,” she answered in a sing-song voice while sliding the tray from his grasp. “But I haven’t done this for you in a while. Let me love on you a little bit.”

His eyes tracked her every move until she was behind him at the kitchen sink. Boyish nervousness made him twiddle his thumbs until words came rushing out like water from a burst pipe as he sat back down.

“So, how you doing? How you been?”

“I’ve been okay. Mostly work and no play, you know. Thankful to be out of that classroom for a few weeks and get some peace.”

“Yeah? Kids driving you crazy?”

“Baby, the kids, their parents, and my parents are driving me to drink,” she laughed. “I can’t catch a break.”

“What about your man? He driving you crazy?”

Patrice scoffed and shook her head. Her mama and his mama talked too much. Terry chewed his bottom lip, hoping he didn’t offend.

“We…aren’t together anymore. Hard to build a family together when he’s off building one across town.”

Terry craned his neck around the armchair to make sympathetic eye contact. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know that part. I wouldn’t have said anything.”

“It’s alright. I gave it to God a long time ago. Maybe I’m not meant to be anybody’s wife yet.”

“Maybe you weren’t meant to be his wife.”

“Well, it’s not like any suitors are knocking down my door for my hand in marriage.”

“Probably because you keep swinging it open before anybody gets a chance.”

Patrice rolled her eyes and flashed her middle finger in Terry’s direction. “Ha-ha. I see you didn’t lose your jokes at Lejeune. Only your ability to keep in touch.”

Her retort left a shallow cut in Terry’s ego, making him turn his attention back to the television. He knew he’d broken a decades-old promise and that atoning for his sins would take time. But he also knew that, at any moment, Patrice could send him back into the world with nothing more than a full belly and a swift kick in the ass. He had to tread lightly.

Taking the lull in conversation as his opportunity to lick his wounds in private, Terry stood and gathered his belongings in both hands. Patrice watched him from her spot with an apologetic expression.

“You don’t have to leave. Got a couple errands to run so it’ll be quiet in here. Take the whole couch if you want.”

“That’s alright, but thank you. Figure I can make myself useful and cut the yard. Maybe unpack some of this stuff if that’s alright with you. You got a mower?”

“Yeah, it’s back there,” she answered, gesturing toward the backyard with her head. “Will you be here when I get back?”

Sensing the hidden motivation behind her question, Terry dropped his bag to the ground and made his way into the kitchen. Cautiously, he leaned down to press a short kiss to Patrice’s forehead before using his index finger to tilt her head upward and meet his eyeline. “Yes. I promise. You don’t need to worry about me.”

Her eyes fluttered closed for a half second while she nodded her understanding. A wave of relief made the hair on her arms stand at attention but she quickly bit back any urge to engage further.

“You looked tired when you got in,” Patrice started, turning her back to Terry to conceal her flustered face. “I cleared Junior’s old bed back there. It’s a little small but sturdy. The sheets are fresh. Let me know if you need more blankets. I like it cold at night.”

“I’ll survive, girl. I’ve slept in worse places than a full-sized bed. Thank you.”

A split second of hesitation kept their eyes glued to one another until Terry ended the stalemate by backing out of the room and disappearing down the hallway.

Patrice took his absence as an opportunity to compose herself. Busy hands and racing thoughts fueled a cleaning marathon until tasks that had long fallen to the bottom of her to-do list were crossed off.

For hours they co-existed without many words exchanged. Occasionally, Patrice would steal glances at Terry while he meticulously tended to the lawn and bushes. When he could, Terry made a point to brush up against her when he walked past and agree with each of her many suggestions. Being in her space was enough for him and he dared not upset the natural harmony.

By the time dinner rolled around, they had found a groove. A quiet dinner led to an even quieter cleanup shift and quick good nights exchanged after watching Jeopardy together.

Terry left Patrice to her own devices while he fought to acclimate to such cushy surroundings. Try as he might, he couldn’t get used to the soft mattress below him or the near-frigid temperature in the house. Tossing and turning left him unsatisfied. The walls felt like they were converging. Flashbacks were turning into night sweats. He needed to escape.

Slowly, he slid out of bed and into a pair of slippers Patrice had gifted him earlier in the day. Measured steps help him sneak past her bed bedroom, out of the back door, and down into the backyard without causing a disturbance.

The early June air was balmy, clinging to the skin beneath his t-shirt. In the distance loud bass from someone’s car speaker vibrated until it was out of earshot. Dogs barked and howled to salute the moon worked in tandem with the faint smell of charcoal cooling from a night of backyard barbecues to remind him that he was far from the trouble of Shelby Springs.

It’d been a while since he could enjoy the night without being on high alert. The last week was a special kind of hell that he feared he could never shake. The urge to flee was beginning to creep in like the tide, threatening to wash away what little progress he’d made.

After a few deep breaths and mumbled prayer, Terry retreated to a porch swing to rest his weary legs. His shoulders relaxed as soon as his backside met the aged oak and, almost instantly, he felt safe enough to close his eyes. One deep breath turned into another until he was drifting into his first peaceful sleep in weeks.

Minutes passed like seconds. Thoughts slowed to a halt. His heartbeat regulated. Near bliss was upon him.

Inside, a single lamp flipped on to illuminate Patrice’s path as she searched the house for her guest. His room and bathroom had turned up empty results with almost no sign that he’d been there throughout the day. He wasn’t on the couch or in the kitchen raiding the fridge like she half expected. Worry had all but made her pass out until she heard the slight creak of her swing on the porch, making his head appear and disappear from the window above the sink.

She couldn’t fully open the door before Terry opened one eye and looked in her direction. She froze and he smiled.

“Feet not as heavy as you thought, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah. If I’d known you trade in a bed for this old thing I wouldn’t have wasted my time on laundry.”

“Hey, I built this old thing, remember?”

Patrice chuckled at the memory and pointed at the metal chain keeping the swing in place. “Damn near lost a finger behind it, too.”

“Would’ve been worth it knowing you were happy.” Patrice nervously shifted her weight from left to right under Terry’s intense gaze while he took his turn to look her over. Finally noticing her awkwardly standing between the screendoor, he motioned to the spot beside him. “Sit with me for a second.”

Patrice visibly wrestled with her decision but ultimately joined him. They maintained a careful distance, being sure to keep their individual limbs from connecting for fear that the mere sensation would set them ablaze. They played a childish game of cat and mouse until Patrice spoke.

“I was rude earlier,” Patrice confessed while fiddling with the hem of her t-shirt. Terry closed his heavy eyes to cure the burning sensation growing by the minute but acknowledged her statement with a confused grunt. She continued. “I never asked how you were doing. The whole thing about my ex sort of brought up old feelings.”

He frowned, hurt by her revelation. “You know I wasn’t trying to hurt you, right?”

“You never are. Same ol’ honorable TJ. Terry, I mean.”

“TJ for you.”

Again he popped one eye open and paired it with a grin that disamered Patrice and made her giggle like her high school self. The sound had him resolve that he’d spend his whole life making stupid faces if it meant she’d get some joy from them.

“You ready to tell me everything I missed or are you content with popping up on my porch? And how long do you plan to be here eating all my food, anyway?”

“I don’t think you wanna hear that,” he answered in an attempt to dodge the loaded question. Patrice persisted.

“No, I do. I see the tattoos and the fresh haircut. TJ turned into a man while he was gone. At least let me get to know this new person.”

“I grew up,” he sighed after some time. “Gained some. Lost a lot. Still trying to pick up the pieces.”

“What’d you lose?”

“Lately? Money. Family. Shit, my mind.”

“Why?”

“Mike died.” An abrupt interruption of an already complicated conversation brought forth a long pause. He waited for an interjection but found none, prompting him to offer more details. “He was killed. In jail. I tried to get him out and bring him home but I was too late.” Terry answered without making eye contact. Shame wouldn’t allow him to meet her potential judgment.

Patrice mentally cycled through names and faces until she realized the gravity of Terry’s statement. She reached out to breach their unspoken barrier and grabbed his hand which he accepted with no pushback.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” he answered before squeezing her hand and finally returning her eye contact. “I handled everything. It’s over for now. I’m here with you. We can focus on that.”

“Even though you keep skipping how long you’ll stay.”

Patrice’s warmth was starting to take a backseat to her cold nature. Old wounds had started to re-open and rebuild a wall they both thought they’d successfully hurdled. Despite her attempt to pull her hand out of his grasp, Terry stayed put. He eyed her for a moment, picking up on a thin veil of tears threatening to form at her water line.

She watched his normally steely blue-gray eyes soften into something that mirrored the softness he carried when they were kids. She couldn’t find the gumption to look away as he brought her knuckles up to his lips for a set of short kisses before looking back up at her. Pleading. Begging for any indication that she had softened her heart toward him.

“Treecey, I’m sorry. I don’t know how else to say it. You meant more to me than the way I left and I pray every day for a chance to make it right. We crossed a line that night and I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t handle that like a man should have. I’m sorry until I’m blue in the face.”

Sincerity was thick in his voice despite his low, even tone.

Patrice listened without a word. A single tear cascaded down her face despite her valiant attempts to keep her emotions at bay. She swore she’d never cry about Terrence Richmond again. But old habits die hard.

Terry used his free hand to swipe away that tear and the next one sitting at her lower lash line with the pad of his thumb.

“Say something,” he pleaded. “Anything. Tell me you hate me.”

“You know I don’t hate you,” she whispered, too choked up to continue without a deep breath. “I…I just feel like you took a piece of me with you, you know? And you never wrote back. You never called. You shut me out like we were never friends. We could’ve gone back to how things were.”

“I fucked that up.”

“I’m aware. But that doesn’t mean that I trust you won’t do it again. No matter how much I don’t hate you, I’m not eighteen anymore. My patience is thin. I can’t allow you to turn my world upside down again.”

“Hand to God I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Yeah. I hope so.” Though she whispered, Patrice’s words sliced through Terry like a hot knife through butter.

He hung his head in defeat as she pulled her hand from his grasp and made quick work of standing from the bench. Her footsteps retreated past him and to the back door until she paused.

He looked over his shoulder to find her eyes closed and chin pointed to the sky in contemplative silence. This was it. The final blow.

She took a deep breath and stared straight ahead. “Stay as long as you want. Junior’s living with his girlfriend now, so nobody’s coming to make you leave. Tomorrow, we can go get you some new clothes. I’m tired of looking at those raggedy t-shirts already.”

Terry took her jab in stride and gave her a half smile as a sign of compliance. “Yes ma’am. Thank you.”

“Mhm. Lock the door behind you when you come in.”

“Good night, Treecey.” His farewell came in an annoyingly sweet voice as a last-ditch effort to drag some loving words from her. Patrice stopped and gave him one more once over and a dismissive eye roll.

He waited for the ghost of a smile that disappeared before he could blink. She shook her head and took a step inside the house.

“Shut up, Terry. Go to bed.”

Terry hid his amusement until she was out of sight, leaving him alone to grin at how even her rebukes felt like love letters.

“Shut up,” he repeated to himself as he closed his eyes to doze again. “Hm. I’ll take it.”

TAGS: @planetblaque

Happy to tag whoever is interested.

#terry richmond #terry richmond x oc #rebel ridge #aaron pierre

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

(This is a resubmission. I sent my original ask I think back in November and I haven’t been able to find it so I reread your FAQ real quick and deduced Tumblr must have eaten it or I won’t find it)(sorry if it has been posted and I missed it)

AITA for kind of leading on my friend who is now my boyfriend back when he thought he was my girlfriend?

(also this isn’t a fandom at all if it got mistaken for that, this is my life somehow)

I dont remember the fake names I used so let’s go with TJ for technically partner, and El and Leo for my sister and her boyfriend.

The long and short of it is, I’m a gay man. Always have been and probably always will be. TJ, Leo and El and I are all pretty good friends even before this.

What basically happened was I had bought tickets to see a movie with a guy I liked, who cancelled on me last minute. It was a movie TJ (at the time identifying as female and had not realized he was a trans man) really wanted to see, so I brought TJ. On what I assumed was a friendship thing.

That’s kind of where it started. From there, there were several events that this guy I liked kept cancelling on me, and as total coincidence I swear, were things TJ liked doing. Movie, zoo, Italian restaurant one time, etc.

(Honestly it got to a point that it was obvious the other guy and I weren’t going to work, so there weren’t any hard feelings there)

This went on for a few months before Leo mentioned how cute we were together. I wasn’t sure what he meant and he and El admitted that they thought that TJ and I were dating, that I was actually bi and had decided to go out with TJ. (Who just for the record is Leo’s brother so he saw how happy TJ apparently was lately)

Anyway all that freaked me out and I didn’t realize that TJ and the others thought I liked TJ like that. I mean at the time I thought we were just really good friends, and it’s not like there’s anything about TJ at the time that would have made him a bad girlfriend, just that I wasn’t interested in girls.

Until TJ came out to me as trans. I hadn’t known whether to tell TJ the truth or not, and then when he came out to me I realized how much he trusted me and I couldn’t. Hurt him like that.

But now he’s like, literally the hottest guy ever and I’m honestly really glad I stuck it out because now we’re definitely dating and I’m the luckiest guy ever.

But I still wonder if I was the asshole for never being honest, and if I still am for still not telling him the truth. Like, if I WAS honest, maybe I wouldn’t be dating him now. Idk.

Am I an asshole?

(ps: @throw-it-out-boys is my throwaway sideblog for this, so I’m tagging it so I’ll get a ping if this one is posted. In theory)

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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uncloseted · 1 year ago

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can you please give me some book recommendations? i'm going stir crazy without a hobby and i want to get back into reading

For getting out of a reading slump, I really like books of short stories because you can read them in one sitting and quickly feel like you're making progress without having to put in that much effort. The short stories collections that I have on my current reading list are Lizard and Daisy's Life, both by Banana Yoshimoto.

For a non-fiction essay collection, Chuck Klosterman's books are always a fun read without being too stodgy. Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs is the one most people start with, and it's 18 different comedic essays about pop culture. One of the essays, What Happens When People Stop Being Polite, fundamentally changed the way I view the world and I think about it constantly. As some of you might know, I also love his book But What if We're Wrong. That one is a more epistemological endeavor that gets weird really fast, but if you're into that sort of thing it's amazing.

Another quick read is 84, Charing Cross Road by Helene Hanff. It's told entirely in letters and it focuses on the the twenty-year correspondence between the author and Frank Doel, chief buyer of Marks & Co antiquarian booksellers in London.

The last books that got me out of a reading slump were the Scholomance trilogy by Naomi Novik, starting with A Deadly Education. These books are great if you devoured the Harry Potter books as a kid but want a more realistic, kind of grim take on it that includes romance.

Kind of along a similar line, The Atlas Six by Olivie Blake is a very fun book that focuses on 20-somethings who are part of a magical society. This one was a favorite on BookTok and I get why- it's not the best written book ever, but it's a lot of fun and the minute I finished it I wanted more.

The last book that I found to be a really fun, easy read was The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna which is a warm and uplifting novel about found families. The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune is in a similar vein and another quick read.

If you like books that are no plot, just vibes, try The Night Circus and The Starless Sea, both by Erin Morgenstern. These are two of my favorite books ever, and I re-read them whenever I don't feel like reading something new.

If you want something that's mysterious enough that you want to stick with it, try Piranesi by Susanna Clarke. I won't say too much about it, just that I didn't want to put it down once I started it.

If you like hopepunk sci-fi, anything by Becky Chambers is great. I read all seven of her books back to back because I liked them so much. If you like Star Trek (or the general idea of people going to different planets and interacting with different species), start with The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet. If you want something more terrestrial, A Psalm for the Wild-Built is a really beautiful novella about two characters who try to answer the question "what do people need?" If I could live in the world of A Psalm for the Wild-Built, I would.

I'm sure there are some I'm forgetting, but those are the ones that come to mind for me. I would love to hear everyone else's suggestions, too.

#books #books and reading #bookstagram #bookblr #currently reading #reading #book recommendations

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redheadgleek · 1 year ago

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Books read July-September

July The Grace of Wild Things by Heather Fawcett. A completely enchanting Anne of Green Gables retelling. Utterly delightful and unique. Book Lovers by Emily Henry. My first book that I’ve read of hers and it set high standards for the rest of them. I loved the characters, I loved the romance, and it just made me feel all the feelings. The Girl Who Fell Beneath the Sea by Axie Oh (audio). A retelling of a Korean fairytale that I knew nothing about. I loved the voice actor (she sounded a lot like Christina Chong from Strange New Worlds). Under the Whispering Door by T.J. Klune (audio). Drove to Yellowstone and back and this was one of my listens. I think it was even better as an audiobook – the voices were great. Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin. I loved this book and I didn’t think I would, but it was written for my generation and dealt a lot with college and nostalgia and evolving friendships. A House with Good Bones by T. Kingfisher. I don’t like her horror as much as I like her fairy tales and fantasy. A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland. A m/m romance set in a fictional Islamic-like world. The world building was fantastic, the magic building was disappointing, and the romance was sweet, if slow-building. The Celebrants by Steven Rowley. I almost gave up on this entirely after the first chapter, because it felt pretentious and dull and “look how adult we are because we are talking about using drugs”, but I kept reading because I liked the premise and by about half way through, I realized that i really liked the story and most of the characters. College nostalgia seems to be my thing right now, and this really captured that friendship – they just all needed less reliance on substances when having conversations. It made me want to do something similar with my friends.

August: Strange Planet by Nathan Pye. I really like his comics so this was a fun quick read from the library. In the Lives of Puppets by TJ Klune (audio). The book on the drive back from Yellowstone. I didn’t really like the voice actor, which is surprising because I loved his voices in The House in the Cerulean Sea. The rhythm of his voice was off-putting. Thunderhead by Neal Shusterman. Second book of the Arc of the Scythe series. A very solid second book. Nottingham: The True Story of Robyn Hood by Anna Burke. A gender swapped Robin Hood story – fast read and fun. The Emperor’s Soul by Brandon Sanderson. Friend recommendation. My first Brandon Sanderson read. This was a well developed little novella and an ending that surprised me and yet fit quite well. The Color of Money: Black Banks and the Racial Wealth Gap by Mehrsa Baradaran (audio). Truly depressing but important look at how systemic racism and blatant racism lead to the wealth gap. Anxious People by Fredrik Backman. Lovely book, with interwoven characters, and plenty of gray humor. The Moon by Night by Madeleine L’Engle. I had a hankering to reread this after my failed to launch summer romances. Definitely felt the age of this book (written in the 1960s) and the pacing is much different than I remembered, but still some sweet parts. Light from Uncommon Stars by Ryka Aoki. I don’t even know how to describe this book. Space opera meets Faust? Foster by Claire Keegan. So much atmosphere packed in this short story. Beach Read by Emily Henry. Not quite as good as Book Lovers, but a close second. They just never read on a beach… Carry: A Memoir of Survival on Stolen Land by Toni Jensen. Book club. This was unexpectedly powerful and the theme of gun violence through was subtle but important. People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry. This was definitely a “you are my story had I had done what I could not do” for me so it probably hit me a little differently than others. It worked well as a When Harry Meets Sally rewrite. Thornhedge by T. Kingfisher. A short Sleeping Beauty retelling of a sort. I adored Toadling. Meet the Austins by Madeleine L’Engle. Went back to read book 1 since I felt like I had missed things with the Moon at Night. I don’t know if I’ll read the whole series again. Small Things Like These by Claire Keegan. I keep expecting really terrible things to happen to her characters so I’m on edge when reading, but it’s never as bad as I fear.

September: Happy Place by Emily Henry. I was quite in my unhappy place by the end of this book and could grumble about it for hours. The Toll by Neal Shusterman. I can understand why there was some disappointment with the ending of the trilogy but I thought it was quite fitting and I loved the last chapter. Dinners with Ruth: A Memoir on the Power of Friendships by Nina Totenberg. Made me really miss Ruth Bater Ginsberg, but I also liked the focus on how friendships enrich adults lives (I’m liking this theme of friendship much better than the problems with mothers of the first half of the year). A Deadly Education, The Last Graduate, and The Golden Enclaves by Naomi Novik. Friend recommendation. I found the 1st person narrative to be claustrophobic as it was all stream of consciousness and the world-building a little too pretentious, but the story was still enjoyable. Mortal Follies by Alexis Hall. His books are always hit or miss for me and this one fell into more of the miss bucket – the mystery solved itself halfway through, the next quarter was my least favorite romance trope, and then it was off for another mystery.

Currently reading: Firekeeper’s Daughter (tried this one on audio and it was too much teenager angst, so reading it instead, Braiding Sweetgrass (audio), The Romance Rx (I’m so determined to find a good doctors in training story. I’m a quarter of the way through and can tell you that this won’t be it).

Friend recommendations still to go: The School for Good Mothers by Jessamine Chan, Kaikeyi by Vaishnavi Patel, Sweet Like Jasmine by Bonnie Gray, Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt.

#reading #books #books 2023

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visualnovelzombie · 2 years ago

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Furry Visual Novel Book Club: Echo Week 1 SPOILER DISCUSSIONS

Hi everyone, here is the SPOILER discussion post for “Echo - Saturday” (Click HERE for the Spoiler Free Discussion)

Next - Original - Spoiler Free Version

Let me know if you have any feedback for the format, and be sure to vote in the poll linked at the end of the post for which Route we’ll be doing first! This is for people who have completed ALL of Echo previously!

As we hit Start, he melancholy title theme is cut silent, only to be replaced with a droning hum on a black background. A mysterious narrator opens by saying that we’re ‘returning’ and that just like this town, we’re only going in circles, as the opening ‘Day Card’ drops.

What could this Narrator be referring to? How is the town itself going in a circle?

It is safe to presume that the Narrator is Echo-Samuel Ayers that has bonded with Chase. While there are many possible interpretations, the cleanest and easiest to me, is that Samuel (who I will drop the ‘Echo’ moniker because his ‘ghost’ doesn’t appear in game) is referring to the ‘Player’ as an entity, and that how once again we are returning to see our characters suffer through the timelines etched in stone, and how we can’t stay away from their suffering, despite our attempts to make better choices. This sets the tone and meta-narrative of the Visual Novel as a whole and is the biggest IN PLAIN SIGHT type of spoiler this game gives.

We are then whisked onto a desert highway where the main character, Chase Hunter, has a conversation with is mom.

Is there information can we glean from this quick introduction of our lead character?

My pet answer here is that Chase is the same as his mom, in more ways than one. We see later on how her gossiping causes a lot of problems for Sydney, and how she might not be the most faithful/be promiscuous. Something we see Chase do... We Also learn that Chase is dismissive of his parents opinions/concerns, and that he’s ‘struck out on his own’.

We’re introduced to two of Chase’s friends, Jenna and Tj. The trio drive down the highway and Chase eventually remarks about being “Unbalanced” with just the three of them

Is there anything we can learn about how Chase describes about his friends here?

Chase wants or needs things to be the ‘same’, just like Leo. He wants the comfort and security of how things were, even though he’s been the instrument of change and escape. He’s torn between wanting his old life (before Sam) and also wanting to escape the psychic mind prison he’s found himself stuck in.

A short discussion later and we’re met with the game’s first choice: How the main character feels about the journey.

How impactful do you think a choice so early, with so little information could be? Why would the author put something as potentially impactful as a choice so early with such little ground work?

It doesn’t. It’s a direct commentary about how “we’ll always be back” and “no matter how hard we try, we’re always moving in circles”. I also believe it’s both an ease into normalcy for VN players in general, and masking Chase as a “blank slate protagonist”, as he isn’t sure about how he feels about a very big thing he’s spent all day headed towards for HOURS. A clever masking trick and mechanical tutorial all wrapped into one.

Spoiler Discussion/Observation: It was Chase who contacted Leo about going back during Spring Break, and from there Leo plans the group hangout. This shows Chase was still in contact with Leo and if Leo was truly ONLY planning on getting back with Chase, the wolf would have probably not invited everyone else back. Of course the growing Hysteria probably threw off his intentions as we clearly see later on in the game. But also highlights how he reacts/feels in Tj’s and Carl’s route while not omnipresent.

Following the choice the trio arrive at the hotel and disembark. The first ‘musical’ track begins to play when we get our first character sprite, “Neutral” replacing the ambient highway noises, and we get our first glance at the characters we’ve been with.

Tj Hess and Jenna Begay

The trio settle into the motel room and another character is introduced, Carl Hendricks.

Our four characters discuss what they’ve been doing since highschool; Carl has dropped out of college that he attended with Chase, Chase is enrolled in a journalism major, Jenna is enrolled in a psychology major with plans set in motion to attend grad school, and Tj is in a sports medicine program at a Christian College.

Through natural dialogue the characters are able to give concise and quick insights to their interests, motives, and character disposition. An ‘exposition dump’ that provides deeper insight than at first glance (That we’ll see later!) Just a short tidbit that stood out to me as excellent writing.

We’re then introduced to two new characters, accompanied by the track, ‘Come Over’, a Flirtatious Synth Jazz piece. Chase’s tail involuntary thumps and his heart skips a beat as the two walk in

Flynn Moore

and Leo Alvarez

The group banter for a while, enjoying their meals. Chase discusses going to Lake Emma with Leo, a local reservoir, in order to complete the Otter’s school project. Leo immediately shuts the idea down, the two glancing at Flynn in the process. Chase feels guilty about the idea, and says he feels like an imposter for not knowing how his friends feel and trying to run the place after being gone for three years at university. The conversation continues, until the music is cut by Chase noticing Leo’s Anchor Bracelet. Chase is startled after Tj notices that he’s staring into space, and the music resumes with the track, ‘Banter’.

What’s happening to Chase here and why would someone need to call him out from his thoughts?

Chase has main character dissociation disorder caused by one slutty slutty old man. The physical affects show the player that the cause is bigger than a psychotic break, and that inner monologue mechanics/situations can tie into the plot line. (see Tj’s route!)

The group carry on into the afternoon and eventually snap a group photo, the game’s first CG

Spoiler Discussion/Observation: I truly believe that this photo/cg is ‘off balance’, not center-framed, because the group is missing Sydney. Without him, everything is thrown off-balance and into dismay... with Chase at the center of the cosmic unraveling.

Spoiler Discussion/Observation : Chase comments on waiting for Jenna to fall asleep before we’re met with a “...” I believe Chase is being set up for doing ~SOMETHING~ or having the capacity to do ~SOMETHING~ at night. We see this during Tj’s route, but I believe this was placed so early and has other places it can occur, as a tool for Howly to have Chase be the crazy little otter man he is more fluidly, even if we never see much more 100% concrete times of him doing this.

The group continues into the night before the three locals return home and the trio retire for the night. Chase has a nightmare where a metal chain is attached to his leg, pulling him down into a lake. Leo is there and ignores Chase’s situation, choosing instead to compares their “bracelets”, saying “everyone gets one.”

What insight does this nightmare give to earlier events? Does this event cause any tone shifts from what was previously established?

The Anchor Bracelet, the symbol of Echo, is what drives Chase to break into his own head/away from Sam for a second. His guilt and sins and worries bind him to this land (metaphysically, physically, AND mentally), and the nightmare manifests this. Leo is conversely shown to be proud of his bondage, literally wearing it on his sleeve. He also comments how “Everyone gets one”, signalling that everyone else has something that binds them to Echo too... something they can’t escape which leads to cycles of trauma they’re soon to experience/experience again and again...

--------

That concludes the first Book Club for this week! Thanks for reading and I hope to have a fun and hearty discussion with everyone in the replies!

For next week, we are reading all of ‘Sunday’, until the following Day Card:

Be sure not to forget to check out this poll HERE to vote on whose route we’ll start in two week! Thank you again to anyone participating <3

#furry visual novel book club #zombie book club #echo vn

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bellakitse · 4 years ago

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# 32 - “It’s not what it looks like.” - for my soulmate @beka1820, love you babe. 💗

Andrea spies on Carlos and TK at the farmer’s market

Andrea Reyes is in the middle of choosing the best poblano peppers for the chile rellenos she promised Gabriel she would make for dinner when she hears a laugh she would recognize anywhere. Putting down the peppers in her hand, she gives the vendor an apologetic smile and quickly rounds the corner of the stand, following the sound. She stops short, peeking over a bunch of drying peppers, and spots her son, her greatest joy in life, smiling happily at a pretty boy.

TK, not TJ, her brain supplies, and she blushes when she remembers how she got it wrong the first time.

He looks good, especially after the ordeal she knows he went through just a few weeks ago. Her heart had been in her throat when Gabriel told her everything her son and his boyfriend had gone through, and she’d called to check in, wanting nothing more than to show up at his doorstep and check on them but in the end, not wanting to overstep.

She has to admit the curiosity has been eating her alive. After telling her about TK’s rescue, Gabriel had said it was obvious their boy was in love with the young man they had met at the market, and she knew Gabriel didn’t say that lightly. Spying on them now, she can’t help but agree.

She watches as Carlos looks at TK with one of the softest expressions she has ever seen on his face. Her boy has always been tenderhearted, his feelings constantly on the surface for the world to see. What she sees now is pure unadulterated love shining from his eyes as he looks at his boyfriend.

“Here, try this,” she hears TK say as he holds a berry up to Carlos’ mouth. “Sweet, right?” he questions when Carlos accepts his offering.

“You’re sweeter,” Carlos answers, and Andrea finds herself blushing along with TK at that response.

“You’re ridiculous,” TK chuckles, shaking his head at him. He contradicts himself by closing the small space between them, leaning in to give Carlos a kiss on the cheek.

Carlos turns his face just as TK is about to press his lips to his skin, swallowing the small squeak of surprise the young man lets out.

Andrea covers her mouth to muffle the huff of laughter she lets out at the maneuver. It’s something Gabriel has done to her for years, and their son has apparently been taking notes. She feels her heart squeeze with happiness as she watches how TK melts into her son, leaning on him as Carlos takes his time kissing him softly and thoroughly.

It’s more PDA than she expected from her son, but it fills her with joy to see him so open with his love. She has been feeling guilty thinking of the reasons why Carlos lied to them the first time they ran into them. Deep down, she knows the blame falls on her and Gabriel’s shoulders. They’d failed to reassure him they were okay with his sexuality, and as a result, he’s hidden parts of himself from them. Her worry since realizing their mistake has been that maybe Carlos wasn’t just hiding it from them but hiding himself from the world. Seeing him with TK now, seeing how he seems to get lost in their love for each other, eases that concern.

“Are you just going to keep hiding behind the peppers, or are you going to come over and say hi, Mami?”

Andrea startles at the question. She’d gotten so lost in her thoughts, she hadn’t noticed when Carlos stopped kissing his boyfriend and spotted her instead. She finds them both watching her, TK with barely contained amusement, and Carlos with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s not what it looks like,” she blurts out, feeling her face go red hot as Carlos raises his other eyebrow at her.

“Really?” he questions, his disbelief evident in his voice. “Because it looks like you were spying on us, badly. You have no stealth, Mami, dad would be embarrassed,” he continues with a smirk, his brown eyes shining with amusement.

TK slaps the back of his hand against Carlos’ stomach. “Don’t be rude to your mother,” he scolds him, and Andrea would believe him more if his green eyes weren’t dancing with laughter too. “Hi, Mrs. Reyes,” he says to her with a sweet boyish smile she doesn’t buy for a second. He’s just as much a mocoso as her son. She tells them as much as she comes out of her hiding place and walks over to them, earning a laugh from Carlos as he explains the word to his boyfriend.

“You’re not the first person to call me a brat,” TK says with that easy smile of his. He truly is beautiful, and Andrea can already tell his beauty is not just superficial.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to spy on the two of you,” she says quietly, biting down on her lip nervously before she continues. “I just wanted to – “ she trails off for a moment, trying to think of the right word. “Know you, I guess?”

She watches as Carlos and TK give each other a look, seeming to communicate without words. Finally, TK smiles, giving Carlos a nod.

“We’re going to get lunch at the restaurant at the end of the block,” Carlos starts to tell her with a hopeful look on his face. “It would be nice if you joined us, Mami.”

Andrea looks from her son to his boyfriend, finding the same hopeful look on his welcoming face. It creates a lump of emotion in her throat. She swallows around it as she gives them a quick nod.

“Yes,” she rushes to say, laughing softly at herself. “Yes, I would like that, mijo.”

She feels her eyes sting as her sweet boy lights up, and she can’t help but step forward and wrap her arms around him, letting out a sigh when he hugs her back. Over his shoulder, she finds TK watching them with a smile on his face. As his eyes lock with hers, she hopes he can see the gratitude she feels from knowing her son has him in his life. The way his expression goes even gentler tells her he understands.

Stepping out of the hug, Andrea is surprised when TK steps forward and offers her his arm to take. Charmed, she slips her arm through his, giving his bicep a squeeze of appreciation.

He takes hold of Carlos’ hand on the other side of him, smiling brightly. “Let’s get that lunch then.”

#911 lone star #tarlos #911 lone star fic #tarlos fic #tk x carlos #andrea reyes #outsider POV #my writing #100 open sentence prompts

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lovetenya · 4 years ago

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𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬: 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞

pairing: tamaki amajiki x gender neutral reader

warnings: one swear word and some emotional language, but it ends in comfort. no tamaki amajiki angst or slander allowed in my house. just fluff.

word count: about 1.5k

author’s note: i love you, tamaki amajiki. that’s why you get the honor of being dedicated my favorite color. mwwwwah.

being in love with tamaki amajiki is orange.

it’s warm, it’s passionate, it’s soft, it’s gentle.

it’s pure, genuine, and it feels like home.

it’s the light that comes through the window on the weekend, shining perfectly into your eyes.

on a normal morning, there isn’t time to waste. he has to leave early, so he pulls on his underclothes, puts his coat on, and then leaves, since his suit and quirk-enhancing food is stored at the agency. mornings together don’t normally last longer than it takes him to lightly shake you awake and say “bye, honey. i hope you have a good day.” and give you a quick kiss.

orange is the juice he pours as soon as he wakes up, the one you taste when he kisses you, saying it’s “better than tasting my morning breath.” you’re not one to complain, especially not about getting kisses from tamaki. they usually make him flustered, so you’ll take as many as you can get.

today is different. though. it’s ten on a saturday morning and tamaki is right next to you, sound asleep. his tired eyes are closed and his expression is one lacking all tension, and full of peace.

he deserves it, you think, considering the night before. you had a meal ready for him when he got home late, but he barely even made it through that. his eyes drooped and his shoulders sagged while he ate, and he looked more pale than usual.

you suggested, “tama, do you wanna shower and then head to bed? we don’t have to stay up late just because it’s friday.”

“sure, honey. that sounds nice,” he yawned, holding his head in his hands.

“i’ll clean up dinner and meet’cha in our room, okay?”

“okay...” he hopped off of his chair at the counter and made his way to your room to get undressed. within ten minutes, the dishes were done, but you didn’t hear tamaki start the shower. what’s he doing in there? you wondered.

you made your way toward the bedroom, not wanting to startle him or walk in on him changing. you knocked lightly on the door before asking “tamaki? are you okay?”

when there was no response, you turned the doorknob and quietly opened the door to see your dear tamaki laying on the bed, fast asleep and fully dressed. he must’ve sat down to take off his bottoms and fell asleep.

poor baby, you thought. i didnt realize he was that tired.

lightly, you walked to the side of the bed where he was lying on his back with his legs hanging off the edge. you moved his bangs away from his face and kissed his forehead sweetly. he looked so peaceful, but he couldn’t sleep in his work clothes. there’s no way that’s sanitary or comfortable.

“tama, baby. sit up for me so we can take your clothes off and go to bed.”

“mm..” he whimpered, eyes still closed. he didn’t move.

“come on, bub. sit up, please. let’s get some pajamas on, okay?” a pair of pajama pants and an old t-shirt never sounded better to tamaki, even though he was still half-asleep.

“okay...” he sat up and sleepily hugged your torso, putting his cheek to your chest. you stood in front of where he was sitting, and he slowly raised his arms to let you peel off his underclothes and finish getting him undressed. you put the t-shirt over his arms, and he slowly pulled it down over his head and back. next, the bottoms. you grabbed a pair of boxers from his drawer and held them out to him.

“here, tama, put on some clean underwear. yours probably stink.”

“nuh-uh. m’not stinky. m’ just sleepy...”

“i’m just kidding, bub. change quick so we can go to sleep.”

he pulled on his boxers and pair of pajama pants, then got under the soft, smooth covers. you got your pajamas on (a peach-colored t-shirt and some shorts) then flicked off the light and layed down next to him.

his eyes were already shut and he was breathing lightly, so you assumed he was asleep. even though you really missed him this week, you didn’t want to bother him by grabbing his hand or trying to hold him.

“mmph.” he grunted, stirring softly. you didn’t reply, figuring he was just making noises in his sleep. he did the same thing one of the first times you shared a bed, but he was really embarrassed upon hearing about it, so you didn’t bring it up again.

again, he asserted, “mmm!!” but more displeased this time.

“what’s wrong, tama?” you asked. he rolled toward you.

“are you.. are you mad at me?” he asked weakly, desperately hoping that you’d say no. there were sleepy, fearful tears welling in his eyes, but he wasn’t conscious enough to care to hide them.

“not at all, baby, why would i be mad at you?”

“well.. you didn’t.. you didn’t even try to.. you’re not even..” he paused, trying to compose himself. you didn’t interrupt, knowing he’d make his point at his own pace. he always said what he meant eventually.

he continued, “you’re not even holding my hand.. and i just.. really missed you.. and.. i didn’t mean to.. make you upset by being gone this week but i just.. there were so many guys out there.. and i had to help ‘em.. and i’m sorry i didn’t come home until late but--” he couldn’t hold back his tears any longer, his long hours at work rendering him overtired and sensitive. the tears flowed down his face, and you quickly, but softly, reached out to him, bringing him closer.

“oh baby, i’m so sorry. i’m not mad at you.”

“y-you promise?”

“yeah, honey, i promise. c’mere. let me cuddle you.”

you moved over to him, pulling him close. with all the strength he could muster, he wrapped his arms around you, snuggling his head into your neck. you pet his hair gently, soothing him to sleep and reassuring him through soft kisses to his head. his anxiety-fueled cries turned to sniffles, which eventually turned to light snores.

he just really didn’t want to lose you. he didn’t think he could bear to go without you, and you felt the same way. you worried about him terribly while he was out, but never wanted to show him you were afraid for him. you knew he’d take on your emotions and then there’d be two crying lovers.

you bottled up your emotions until you couldn’t handle it anymore, bursting into tears at the slightest change of tamaki’s tone of voice. these moments of emotional intensity often did end in both of you crying, and nights much like this, where you held each other impossibly close. letting go was out of the question.

—

tamaki was so tired this week because he had what can only be described as, well, a super shitty week, so fatgum gave him the weekend off. their conversation went like this:

“i don’t.. mean to be rude by disagreeing, but i just can’t take the whole weekend off. i need to be out there.. helping you.”

“no way, amajiki. what ya’ need is to rest. you can’t do your best work next week if ya’ don’t take a break this week, so go home and rest and then come back on monday ready to go.”

“but--”

“don’t make me call y/n! they’ll make you stay home!” fatgum warned, knowing you’d do exactly that.

tamaki sighed in defeat, “fiiiiiiine.” you’re the only person he’d willingly lose to, time and time again. if his defeat meant your victory, he was okay with losing.

—

orange is is the color of the terra-cotta pots that hold the herbs you planted on your balcony.

“they’re gonna taste so good once they grow! aren’t you excited?” you asked him, hands covered in dirt.

“yeah, if i don’t forget to water them and kill them first,” he deadpanned, tilting the watering can a bit too far and spilling it all over your shoes.

“tamaki!!”

“sorry!!!”

—

orange is your perfect creation. it’s the bleeding together of your crimson red tenderness and his frail yellow anxiety. while you’re there to reassure him, and he’s always there to ground you, noticing the details you missed. you compliment each other in a way that creates something so much stronger, and can never be separated.

orange is the feeling in your heart when he says your name, whether he’s reminding you about that event he has coming up, or when he just wants to hear it breathlessly between kisses. he’ll never get enough of them. he’ll never get enough of you.

orange is the always-growing warmth of his love, and it’s the glowing sparks of fire that fly between you. loving him is easy.

orange is the fluttering of eyelashes as you fall asleep together for the first time, it’s the wholehearted comfort cultivated over time, and it’s the countless pinky promises sealed with kisses. when his heavy heart needs uplifting, you promise to be there. orange is a promise you intend to keep.

—

thanks for reading!

love, tj. 🧋

—

link to my masterlist

#mha #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #tamaki amajiki x gn!reader #tamaki amajiki x you #tamaki amajiki x y/n #tamaki amajiki x reader #mha tamaki #bnha tamaki #tamaki amajiki #color series #my writing #tj’s color series

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calypsoff2 · 3 years ago

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Fourteen. Part 3

Rylee is taking it bad like she is putting her sisters in the mood too, she won’t let Robyn speak or go near her now, but I am dropping Robyn off now at the airport, it’s a silent car journey here anyways. I am sad she is going; I am having to deal with their moods. They are feisty girls, they have their own personality too, but Rylee does have the deciding factor, they watch her closely. Like Tianna was at first sad but she was still hugging Robyn at the frozen yoghurt place but now she didn’t want Robyn to help her in the car, I guess she has Imani left “what are you doing in New York anyways?” I asked, I haven’t really asked, I know she is pitching for me to help with the men’s line but what else “speaking on the men’s line and we are speaking on the launch of Fenty Skin, we are discussing where we should do the shoot” I guess that means she is jetting off again “somewhere nice I guess?” looking over at her “you are right, but I also want you in it so watch yourself” I didn’t know that part “I want you to start using Fenty Skin from now, I will be back with the products that have been made, well should have been” nodding my head “that took a while?” that took so long, this idea was floating around so long, the things were set “yeah that did takes ages, I was going back and forth with the ideas and roll out, this is what I was doing and being so busy at Chris, I don’t just speak on one thing and then every so often my music gets bought up, so it’s like ok? I am doing a collab, so I do need to do that while I am there but yeah, that’s it” busy schedule “nice” is the only thing I can say “you and Jen should be scoping that out for me, but I am doing it, you need to stay home” she is right I do need to stay home.

Robyn’ team is here waiting “Fenty assemble here isn’t it” Robyn side eyed me as I laughed at my own joke, it was funny to me. Getting out of the car, Rich is here “oh and Chris” barely hearing Robyn say, walking around the car to get Robyn�� bag out “speaking on Fenty assemble, I would like to introduce you to your new bodyguard, he will be going back with you in the car. Pat, this is Chris. Chris this is Pat, get along” seeing this big guy in front of me “pat? Is that short for Patrick?” getting my hand out, he shook my hand “how did you know” shaking my head laughing “guessed it brother, so you the new bodyguard huh” Robyn meant it about this bodyguard business, she wasn’t playing at all “yes I am” he stepped back “so there you are, I told you that you will have it. You text him when you need to go anywhere, I am being serious. He goes everywhere with you” Robyn is going to watch me about his, nodding my head “caught this one” Rich said walking over to us with Rylee in his arms “aye, what I say. Stay in the car” Rich placed her down on the ground “you’re big!” Rylee said and ran to me “can we go home now, I am tired from school” looking at Robyn, it’s about time she goes now anyways “yeah we are going” Robyn has a big suitcase to be honest, for three days and she always buys her shit on the go. Jah has her stuff, I am questioning her now, but I won’t day anything to her about it.

Tianna held my hand and Imani is just attached to Robyn’ hip, she ain’t leaving that hip but Robyn is finally putting her down “I am going to be back so soon, ok?” looking down at Rylee, she is not happy and honestly Robyn does so much for Rylee, I know Robyn’ doesn’t like to say she is a favourite but Rylee is “stay here now Imani, it’s dangerous” I said, Robyn shuffled her back a little to me and she looked at Rylee “you going to say bye to your mother now” I said “no” Rylee looked up at me, she meant it “it’s not nice, she is going to be away. No matter how upset you are she isn’t going to be here, and anything can happen” she shook her head “I want to go home” Robyn tried to step to her, to even get a little closer but Rylee stepped back “I don’t want too” this is harsh on Robyn “baby I am sorry, I am so sorry I have to go” Robyn said but it’s not making any change at all, I know Rylee is hurting and I think this is upsetting Robyn a lot more “Rylee please” Rylee moved back again “I want to go” Robyn swallowed hard and looked at me “take care, come back soon” Robyn wrapped her arms around my neck “you got to stop doing this” I said in her ear, she moved back and pecked my lips “I know” she said in a whisper.

I feel a little heartbroken seeing Robyn go actually, like I hate being away from her because anything can happen and if that ever happens I would never be good to anyone, especially my kids. Robyn turned around and waved to us, I smiled lightly. If we didn’t have kids I would be on that jet with her “say bye” looking down at the girls, they are waving but they look so lost. Rylee is hurt and you can tell she is. Robyn disappeared onto the jet “mommy is gone” Imani said “she is Imani” Rylee said, crouching down to the girls “and she will be back soon, it’s ok” letting their hands go “will she though, I really want mom here dad” Rylee said with her lower lip quivering, I knew she would be hurt “and she will be back, just that she has to work” I dragged out “to make others happy but we will be here for her, we will be waiting for her yeah” pressing a kiss to each one of them “what about parent day dad?” Tianna asked, “you got me and momo” Tianna sighed out “it’s so loud here can we go?” nodding my head getting up from my position, this bodyguard is just staring at me. He is new I guess, looking at the jet and can see vaguely a handwave, I think it is. I gasped seeing Rylee just run, she ran off “Rylee!” I spat about to run but Pat grabbed her, she didn’t get far “mommy!” they closed the jet door already, shuffling the girls along with me, these girls are trying to run on this busy runway “thank you god” I am glad he is here now “Rylee” taking her from him “I want mom” Rylee hugged me crying out “hold his hand Imani” we need to go, the jet will be leaving now. Pat just picked up Imani like she was a parcel, it was nothing for him. With my free hand grabbing Tianna’ arm “is Rylee ok dad?” she asked, I just want to go because this is a mess “climb in, come on” Tianna is more shocked at Rylee like she is crying out, Pat is putting Imani in her seat, he is actually not useless “mom is coming” Tianna said “I know she is coming back soon, move up one so Rylee can sit” she is sat there wasting time “but dad” she said, rubbing Rylee’ back “it’s ok, stop being dramatic now. You didn’t want to hug her but want to be like this” she should have hugged her “mommy!” Rylee said, looking at the jet and the door is open again and Robyn is here. Rylee held her arms out to Robyn as Robyn took her from me.

There is so many emotions going on in this place, like deadass there is but I am shocked Robyn came back off the jet. She actually came back to console Rylee which she has, she has settled them all so much that they are quiet in the car. She closed the car door and turned to me “I saw it all and my heart literally dropped, I screamed seeing it. Just seeing her run and you not knowing to run for her and then leave the other two at the same time, my heart dropped. Look at me, I thank god Pat caught her when he did. This will be my last trip; this is too much. I am shaking” she held her hands out “well now you see what I deal with Robyn, but something needs to change, and I think we need to move because it won’t be your last trip. Let’s be real right now, this won’t be the last trip for you and it’s being real. The kids need their mother, they want you. You’re a mother before anything, even being a wife. They come first” Robyn put her head down “I see it, trust me. When I come back we will start discussing” nodding my head, I don’t want to argue with Robyn, she is going away from me so I rather we leave on a good note “I love you” hugging her close “I love you more Chris” we need to make that change quick, it has to happen.

The girls seem to be in a better mood, Rylee is also so whatever was said and done worked “before you go Mel, what happened between you and Robyn?” she never said anything of course “it was vague for the most part, she was saying mostly how much she hates TJ, no good for nothing. And she is shocked I lowered my standard to a lame like him, she thought better of me. I said to her what did you want me to do? We were always in the same vicinity, it was bound to happen. TJ made me laugh, he was good with me so what can I say. She just said that she loves me as a friend and she wants to look after me while pregnant, we made up but there is more to be said because she was busy panicking about Monica” looking down at Imani she is bugging “I want juice dad” letting out an oh “go and get your cup baby, I will” she walked off “Monica is a big part of this house now, she isn’t leaving” I laughed “but I love her, she is so supportive for me and the kids love that, because they are scared” I frowned at Imani “that is a wine glass baby, what the hell?” Mel turned to her “my glass too” she lifted the glass up “that is mommy wine glass now, be careful” taking it from her “mine too” she is being deadass too with this.

Rolling my eyes at the stupid ideas “saw that” Jah said as we both laughed out, I swear meetings to me is funny, all we do is giggle, I blame Jah because he eggs me on most of the time “anyways, I mean I came here for this meeting. I want Savage to always be in people’s mouths, I want people to know we are here to stay so I am deciding to allow Chris to do the men’s line” Jah’ face dropped, so did most of the people in the room “I haven’t met Chris” Jay Brown said, “I am being sarcastic but Chris hasn’t been here, and you want to rely on him for this?” he has a point “he bought this idea to me, I want it to happen. I want to now do a male line, I want him to help, he said he wants too. I mean I will have the last say as I do, that is me. Can we just agree to disagree. I see everyone pulling faces, I get Jen is here always and he is at home. But he is at home to take care of the kids when I am here, when he is here he does his thing” they are judging my husband “this is him being involved, I don’t see it. Unless you put in someone, he is not doing it alone” I sighed out, now Bernard is saying it “I like the idea of the male line, but we need someone that is active, we have meeting over skype, he isn’t there Robyn. You are saving face, like Jay was discussing he has his hands in everything but here, he has a record label now. My concern is him being absent here” well this took a turn “can we just go with the idea, I will have Jah on it, and I will tell Chris he will need to collab” they need to stop this “we can accept that, but you need to check the designs before anything. This is on a bigger scale, not something side street wear” nodding my head.

Jah turned to me and then laughed, swatting his arm “be quiet” I said “now ma’am I ain’t do shit. I just looked at you, don’t you feel like this is at school. The way they all be looking at you, they dislike your husband girl” Jah said “and he hasn’t done shit” he busted out laughing “that is the point sweetie, he just be quiet. I think he still mad they lost some money on that little clothing brand he took back off his little friend and now it’s going nowhere, they are saying it’s bringing the company down you know” shaking my head “yeah about that, I think it’s the clothing brand that is struggling but that isn’t his fault, things happen. His clothing brand doesn’t take a massive hit on the money right?” it’s so stupid “it do though, like I be hearing it with them. Also he jumps into different avenues, he doesn’t stick to just one, so they be like what the hell he be doing, I don’t know girl. But this your company so you do what you need to do, don’t let them just let you backtrack” Jah said as Bernard came back into the room “so this male line” sitting back in my chair “my husband will oversee” Jay Brown stared at me “alongside Jah” I added, Jah looked at me gasping, I mean this will make it easier “well let’s take five, we will continue and speak on Fenty next” thank god, I need a blunt after this meeting.

Tapping on Chris’ name as I blew out the smoke from my lips “pour me some more” I said to Jah, I need a drink too before going back inside “damn you going in” Jah said, Chris finally answered “morning” I know he will be awake “morning” he must have went back to bed after dropping the girls off “tired?” I questioned, he seems like he’s just woke up “I was having a nap, after telling the girls you will be a little later than you said” I cringed “how did they react?” I feel so bad “not shocked, but they went school and you missing parents’ day so congratulations on being the bad parent” shaking my head “thanks” I mouthed to Jah “Chris, I would have rather been there with you! You know this, I rather have been with my kids, what don’t anyone get, y’all just judging me for being away. For doing this but I am doing it for our future, one of us has to work Chris. If this was you Chris, you would be here! You would be doing this, if this was your company you would be away! Shit takes hard work, why am I being penalised by you and my mother, making me feel bad because if this was you, this was you having to be away then you would be away and wouldn’t get penalised, you will get praises for being the man of the house. But because I pop the baby out it makes it worse; I have had enough I want my mother out too, tell her to go home” they all just judging me, I am sick of it “you done ranting? Damn, I ain’t telling your mother shit Robyn. You are feeling like this because you feel bad, so how about it” he angers me “I need to answer this call, it’s the school” Chris said “yeah, yeah bye” disconnecting the call “bad mother thing again?” nodding my head “I am the worst mother of the year, you know. Just because women seem to have this tag where we need to be home, the fuck? If this was Chris he wouldn’t be called a bad parent. I bet you every nigga that is away working isn’t the bad one, let’s move” getting up from the seat, I have been out long enough.

Watching my phone ring for the third time from Chris, dragging my eyes away “are you going to do the collab with PND? He is waiting you know, like we need to do that. Sorry, business aside” Jay Brown laughed “yes, I will. It’s noted, I need to sell my soul next. Like shit, Tina you getting all this?” she just laughed, she has been busy “your diary is busy boss” rolling my eyes “see but erm yeah, I can fit it in. Of course, but music is on the back burner. I need to concentrate on Fenty Skin, we need to shoot that shit too, I am taking the products with me back home, Chris is going to use it. I want to shoot something with Chris in it” my phone is ringing again which stopped me talking “my nigga is calling; I need to pick up. One too many times” grabbing my phone answering it, it’s just too many calls going on “hey” I answered, “I could be dying Robyn, I just thought I would let you know I am in hospital with Imani, she has hurt her arm while in school” my face softened “what!?” I spat “I told you, she hurt her arm. She is just having a scan” hearing Imani in the background “yes I am speaking to mommy” my heart dropped “can you hold her” hearing the doctor say “I will call you back” he disconnected the call and my just feels like someone is squeezing my heart, my daughter is hurt, and I am here away from her.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction #Chrianna Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfiction

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tendertenebrosity · 4 years ago

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Merry Christmas! Have a new Danny and TJ piece, I think people will like this one.

Sequel to here. TJ and Danny are my OCs in @wildfaewhump ‘s Pathverse. A masterpost of their stories can be found here!

TJ woke, fuzzy and confused, to the sound of the lock on his cubby door clicking apart. Still mostly asleep, he found his blindfold – taking a moment to rub sleep out of his eyes before he pulled it down over his brow.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, climbing to his feet, blinking fast behind the cloth, trying to wake himself up. Had he fucked up? He was supposed to be up and dressed and ready when his handler came in, but – was it early? Had he overslept?

Danny didn’t scold him for being unprepared, so maybe it was early. “Morning, kid,” he said, his voice low and distracted. “Put these on.”

TJ took the objects that his handler put into his hands, identifying them by touch after a moment of confusion. Clean scrub shirt, smelling of industrial laundry detergent. Thin slip-on shoes, the sort paths wore when they were leaving the Agency and going out on a job.

“Um,” TJ said, wavering, clutching them to his chest. “Um…”

He tried to make sense of what was happening, mind floundering. This wasn’t how things normally went when TJ left his cubby for work, or meals, or checkups. The wrong order of doing things, the wrong time, the wrong day. Had TJ somehow confused things, made a mistake? He’d felt wrong - weak and confused and shaky - for days, ever since he’d left the infirmary, but not like this. Were they changing things or had TJ forgotten this, too?

Danny made an impatient noise, took the shoes away, pushed the shirt insistently into his hands. “Sorry, kid, I know it’s all out of whack,” he said, his rough voice oddly quiet and yet urgent. “But this is really important, okay? Just put them on, quickly.”

“O-okay,” TJ agreed, fingers fumbling to find the hem of the scrubs.

Danny shifted from foot to foot, as if the bare moments that it took TJ to pull on the shirt and the shoes was too long to wait. Then he grabbed TJ by the upper arm and took him out of the cubby, into the corridors of the Agency.

Danny was moving unusually fast - TJ lagged behind for a moment before realising that and matching his speed. Quick short steps, Danny’s fingers a firm but gentle pressure on TJ’s shoulder.

It was quiet, quieter than TJ had ever known the Agency to be. The whirr of fans and air-conditioning, the faint sound of a car from outside, no other voices or footsteps to distract from the soft background hum of the building itself. Maybe it was really early. TJ was momentarily soothed by the familiar pattern of turns, even if they were going by very fast.

Danny didn’t pause before the exit, like he normally did; there was nobody there to call out to him or to accept whatever paperwork or authorisation he usually gave them. He went straight out through the doors, towing TJ by the arm. His breathing seemed to be a bit fast.

Outside, it was damp and a little cool; there wasn’t much traffic noise or traffic smell.

Danny took TJ through the parking lot, stopped with a murmured word and opened the car doors, all as normal. He went to guide TJ into the car as usual, hands on shoulder and head, but there TJ baulked.

This was wrong. The car was wrong. The door wasn’t the right size, the seat was too low, and the inside of the car smelled odd.

“This isn’t – the car,” he said jerkily, frozen half in and half out of the door. Unease twisted and fluttered in his stomach, and Danny had said it would be okay and that this was important, but, but it was all so weird. The clothing, the quiet Agency, Danny’s silence and palpable tension. Now this? Something was wrong.

Danny pushed TJ’s shoulder and he folded, going forwards into the strange-smelling darkness.

“Yes, it is,” Danny said shortly.

“No, it’s not?” TJ protested, his hands fussing in his lap, flinching away as he touched the unfamiliar fabric of the car seat. He twisted his fingers into the hem of his shirt. “’m sorry…”

Danny clicked his tongue, pulled the seatbelt over TJ. “Shh. It’s okay. It’s my car.”

“Oh.” TJ sniffed again, and realised that the car, though it was definitely not an Agency one, did smell slightly familiar. Danny smelled like this sometimes, and so did people in memories TJ had read. Cigarette smoke?

With that realisation, he relaxed a little into the seat.

“Attaboy,” Danny said absently, patting him on the shoulder. “Fuck. Fuck, here we go.”

And then he was gone, the car door slamming and closing TJ into the car while Danny walked around to the front. The car was noisy as it started, and Danny muttered something unintelligible and irritable-sounding as it started to move.

“Are we going to a job?” TJ asked, a little breathlessly, after the car had been moving for a while and Danny had stopped making the irritable noises.

“Not exactly,” Danny said. He sighed. “How are you doing today?”

“Fine,” TJ said, like he was supposed to. And he was, fine. He’d had nightmares but he’d already forgotten them all. His head and chest hurt, but vaguely, formlessly.

“All right. That’s something. Jesus.” Danny sounded, if anything, more stressed than he had in the Agency, but when he spoke again TJ thought he was probably trying to hide it. “You’re not going to need to read anything today. It’s too complicated to explain what we’re doing, but everything’s going to be fine. Just sit tight back there, kid, okay? We’re probably going to be driving for a while, so go back to sleep if you want.”

“Okay,” TJ said, tentatively. “I’ll try.”

He closed his eyes behind the blindfold, tried to nestle his head against the unfamiliar seat, but he didn’t think he was going to be able to sleep. He was tired but not drowsy anymore, unsettled and fragile. It was as if TJ was a too-full glass of liquid, and the flurry of activity had disturbed it, and if he moved too suddenly it sloshed about.

The car drove on, into the unknown; it didn’t feel the same as Agency cars, not as smooth, different noises. No readings today. He hugged that thought to his chest, and hoped that Danny was right.

TJ shifted, startled, when some time later Danny started speaking again. He’d missed it – had that been an order for TJ? Danny was going to have to repeat himself, but that was okay, he probably wouldn’t mind…

The car filled with the sound of a ringtone. Oh. Danny was just making a phone call. TJ let his head fall back against the seat again.

The voice that came out of the speakers next was polished, rapid-fire.

“Hello, this is Juliette Nguyen, Southwest Star Telepathic Solutions counselling department. How can I help you?”

“Ah… hey,” Danny said, sounding pained, awkward, his voice suddenly higher-pitched and more uncertain than TJ had ever heard it. “Julie, hi. It’s, um, it’s Danny Tavai.”

The new voice was silent for a moment.

Danny breathed out, sharply, as if something had hurt him. “You know, um, Danny, I was in your class at -”

“Danny!” the voice was abruptly much brighter, less polished, containing the edge of a chuckle. “Of course, Danny, hi! Good to hear from you!”

“Yeah, hi,” Danny agreed, sounding relieved and embarrassed in equal measures.

“Man, it’s been a while,” the voice of Julie went on. “We should really get the gang together for coffee sometime. I’m just so busy lately, I never find the time to message you all… Are you still at that Agency in, where was it…”

“Nah, nah,” Danny said, interrupting, dismissive. “I’ve, uh, had a few job changes in the last few years. Congrats on your, uh, promotion, by the way.”

“Thank you,” Julie said, a touch of the polish coming back, smugness detectable even to TJ. “Are you still in the industry?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I am.” He coughed. “It, uh…”

“How’s it going?”

There was a long silence, filled only with the ubiquitous hum and rattle and distant roar of the car.

“Hey. Danny? I think you cut out.”

“No, I’m here.” Danny’s voice was low, rough. He chuckled; it sounded forced. “I just… honestly, Julie, me and the industry… it’s not going so great.”

TJ shifted his head against the seat, brow furrowing under the blindfold. Danny was upset. What was Danny upset about? What did he mean? By ‘the industry’ she must mean Agencies, but that didn’t make sense. Danny was a great handler. The best handler.

Deep down, TJ did know that might not strictly be true; Danny wasn’t all that popular with the other handlers. He pushed that thought away as being disloyal. Danny was a great handler, he told himself defiantly, people at the Agency just didn’t have the knack of translating from Danny-speak. If they did they’d know.

The woman on the phone sounded uncertain, now, too. “Oh. I’m… sorry to hear that…”

“Yeah, it, uh… the current Agency I’m working for, it’s going under,” Danny said. “I’d call it mismanagement, and to be honest with you, that’s not even…” He heaved a sigh, and there was a thump, like a fist on plastic. His voice distorted. “Fucking hell. Sorry, Julie…”

“No, no, it’s fine!” Her voice, electronic and faded, overlapping the flood of Danny’s words.

“Look, I know none of this is your fucking problem, and I’m such a shitty fucking friend we haven’t spoken in years, and you’re way too important nowadays for random fuckwits to just call you up with problems. So I know I’m pushing it, all right, I know and I’m sorry.”

“Hey, whoa -”

“I wouldn’t call you if it wasn’t important. I’m just – I need your help. Or, well, I need to ask you a question, a really fucking weird question...”

“It’s okay, Danny,” Julie said, sounding worried, a little hesitant. “I’ll help if I can. Do you… I mean, look, I don’t know if we’re hiring right now. No promises, but I could definitely put in a good word if you apply to anything…?”

TJ took a sharp breath, fingers clutching at his scrub shirt. Danny leaving? Danny getting another job, somewhere else, with this shiny-voiced woman he already seemed to know and like? The Agency ‘going under’ – under what? he wondered, panicky. Did Danny mean the Agency was going away? Could that even happen?

“No, no,” Danny protested. “That’s not… that’s not why I’m calling. I mean... thank you. That, uh, that means a lot. But I’m not job-hunting.”

Julie sounded surprised. TJ tried to breathe properly again.

“So what… what can I do for you, Danny? You said you had a question?”

“I have…” Danny took a deep breath, in the front seat of the car. “You’re going to think I’m fucking crazy, all right, but I didn’t know what else to do, and I’m sure we can – we can figure something out together, right?”

“Sure,” Julie said, cautiously. Rustling came through the speakers, as if Julie was moving things around in a hurry. “What’d you do?”

The silence in the car continued for another long minute. Something at the front clicked and beeped impatiently until Danny turned it off. The car took a few turns, left then right then right again; TJ let himself sway with the movement, one hand hooked into the seatbelt.

“If you got hold of a Path,” Danny blurted. “Through, I don’t know, weird circumstances. You’d still take it, right? Your agency would take him on? What would you do with him?”

“Weird circumstances?” Julie’s voice sharpened, shifted up in pitch. “Danny, what on earth…”

The car roared a little louder; took another turn, without the warning beeps. Danny’s voice was low, stammering and falling over itself. “Please, Julie, I know this is really fucking screwy, but hear me out, okay? If there was this, um, this Path, and it was going to be d-decommissioned or it was sick or something like that, and the Agency it came from was going under, and it somehow ended up in your facility then you c-could assess it and see whether…”

“Danny.” Julie’s voice was flat now. “It’s starting to sound like you’ve stolen a Path.”

TJ’s fingers curled around the seatbelt.

“Look, it’s not like I fucking…. Broke in with bolt cutters in the dead of the night!” Danny snapped. “He was in one Agency, later on he’ll be in another! I have good reason to – I just thought, if I fudged some paperwork on my side, I could get you contracts and ID numbers and, and, and…”

Danny’s voice trailed away into the crackling silence on the other end of the phone line.

“Look, Julie, if you’d worked in this place you’d understand,” Danny said eventually, his voice defiant. “It’s – it’s stupid and wasteful and cruel, and I can’t fucking… do anything! I just need – I just need to fix this part, okay? Just this one thing, and I know I’ve thrown my career down the drain, all right, I fucking know. But I need to fix it.”

It’s starting to sound like you’ve stolen a Path. TJ swayed in the backseat, braced himself against the door with one hand as his head spun. Had TJ been stolen? Julie seemed to think so. Danny seemed to be having trouble arguing with it. Am I the thing he needs to fix? Why?

Sudden movement and shuffling from the speakers, and Julie had launched into talking again, smooth and rapid and efficient.

“All right, Danny, you’ve gotten yourself into some really impressive trouble this time, but thank God you called me,” she said briskly. “I can definitely help you.”

“You can?” Danny hissed in a breath. “How are you gonna…”

“First. Where is the Path? Is it with you?”

“Yes, I have him here.” Danny sounded exasperated. “I’m trying to do this as by-the-book as I can, Julie, I’m not going to wander off and leave a Path somewhere unsupervised. How stupid do you think I - ”

“Are you driving? Where are you?”

Danny paused. “Yes,” he said slowly, grudgingly. “Why?”

“You need to stop. Just like, pull up somewhere, doesn’t matter where.”

“Why?”

“I’m going to send some people to meet you. Pull up somewhere and stay on the line with me, okay?”

Danny groaned. “Julie, I was hoping you and I could fix this by ourselves without involving anybody else...”

“That’d be... difficult, Danny, I don’t usually deal directly with acquisitions, or other Agencies. What was the address of your Agency?”

TJ could hear Danny’s hands tapping on the plastic of the steering wheel again. The sun was starting to shine through the car window, warm on TJ’s face through the blindfold.

“I’m not dealing with them again,” Danny said, through gritted teeth. “The Path’s not going back there. Don’t call them, Julie.”

“I’m not saying you have to stay, Danny, but I -”

“I’ll talk to them later if I have to, but not now,” Danny snapped. “First I wanted to drop him off with your lot!”

“You asked me to fix this, Danny, how about you let me try?” she shot back. “I’m too far away to meet you in person. You are driving around God knows where with a stolen Path in your car, you know this isn’t going anywhere as long as you stay out there outside Agency control. You need help.”

“I know, but -”

Julie’s voice softened. “It’s okay, Danny, you called the right person. Let me handle it. I can call in some favours and I can sort this whole thing out, but you have to trust me. If you don’t tell me where you are, I can’t do anything.”

The car sped up, engine complaining as Danny pushed it harder. Something rattled in the boot, and TJ caught a startled breath.

“No,” Danny said firmly. “No, Julie, this isn’t going to work. If I take the Path back to the original agency, they’re going to kill him. That’s why I did this whole fucking… going back there doesn’t fix this. He needs to go to someone else. You need to promise me that’ll happen.”

The pause was only half a second. “Yes, you’re right. Of course. I’ll manage something. He’ll be fine, Danny, I’ll figure it out, I promise.”

The car swerved, taking a corner too fast.

“I don’t believe you,” Danny said, and hung up.

#TJ and Danny #whump drabble #pathverse #sympathetic whumper #whumper turned caretaker #institutionalised dehumanisation #blindfolded #escape attempt #it as a pronoun #Julie

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omniscientwreck · 4 years ago

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Would you do 62 and/or 102 with Luc and TJ meeting for the first time? I really love the idea of those kids getting into shenanigans when they’re a little older (well, TJ anyways)

I certainly would! I have quite literally never written children before so I hope this is good! I just think they would be the chaos twins and Beau and Veth would be so proud of all the hijinks they get up to.

It’s the first night of Veth Brenatto’s Adventure Camp and Beau is already exhausted. She’s not sure if it’s technically speaking a good idea to have this many hyperactive kids in one place with weapons but she and Yasha are currently in charge of making nobody burns the shit out of themselves making s’mores and it’s actually relatively peaceful.

Until it isn’t.

Looking back, she should have seen the signs. When Caleb had teleported her and Yasha in from Kammordah with TJ she’d been immediately shot at with a crossbow bolt. She catches it and throws it back at her assailant but the tiny halfling child is to quick and as he barrel rolls out of the way he strikes her again and this time it hits.

She leaps to tackle her tiny assailant and she hears TJ behind her go, “Woah he shot Beau! Who’s that?” Luc Brenatto slips away just before she can grab him and goes running to hide behind Yasha, a tactic he’s learned works pretty well.

She sighs, “Luc one of these days you’re gonna shoot someone with the power to arrest you.” TJ seems only a little overwhelmed by the sudden explosion of sound and bolts, staring awestruck at the little halfling, partially afraid but more in awe.

“Hi.”

Watching kids introduce themselves is weird. Luc looks over and waves, “Hi! I’m Luc, my mom runs the camp. Who are you?”

“I’m TJ, Beau is my big sister!”

“Cool.” They kind of stand for a moment and it looks like Luc is sizing up TJ, trying to decide if he’s a good co-conspirator. “Wanna go try to get Mr. Widogast to drop his levitation?”

TJ seems confused but before he can ask a question Luc has grabbed his hand and they’re scampering off to go piss of Essek.

Now, they’re seated around a fire, Yasha is playing the harp while Veth tells a scary story and most of the kids are sitting in rapt attention. It all happens at once, first she hears a match strike, then she hears one voice, “Oh no she’s coming this way, she’s gonna see us!” and then another, “Please shut up, just shut up! It’s gonna be fine.” Before she can pinpoint exactly where they are she hears a match strike and then a sizzling.

The fucking firecrackers. They start going off where they’re thrown, above the fire mostly and the rest of the children begin to scatter. Beau darts off after TJ and Luc as they try to escape but she’s using her full speed now. She gives them as stern a talking to as possible but they look so proud of themselves and TJ tries to defend Luc, saying it was his idea but she knows better. She’s just happy he’s found a friend.

The week flies by, she teaches many short hyperactive brats to punch good and TJ picks up the light cantrip from Caleb which he’s very proud of. They’re about to depart for Rexxentrum and are just saying their goodbyes to Veth and Yeza when Luc tackles TJ and gives him a little package before he goes. Probably more minor explosives. “Promise me you’ll come back? Next year?”

TJ looks up at Beau, eyes shining with tears threatening to pull over and she just nods, “Yeah kid, we’ll see if we can squeeze in a few visits before then too.”

“Yes!” the boys hug and wave to each other the whole time Caleb is casting, even as they’re transported home.

---

I hope you enjoyed <3 Friendly reminder you can request any of these drabble prompts for any critical role scenario. I'm equally open to fluff and angst, just let me know!

#critical role #luc brenatto #tj lionett #beauregard lionett #cr fanfic #drabble prompts

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visualnovelzombie · 2 years ago

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Furry Visual Novel Book Club: Echo Week 1

Hi everyone, here is the SPOILER FREE discussion post for “Echo - Saturday”

Next - Original - Spoiler Version

Let me know if you have any feedback for the format, and be sure to vote in the poll linked at the end of the post for which Route we’ll be doing first! Feel free to read the next full Segment, ‘Sunday’ if you’re not sure who to pick after just the introduction!

What could this Narrator be referring to? How is the town itself going in a circle?

We are then whisked onto a desert highway where the main character, Chase Hunter, has a conversation with is mom.

Is there information can we glean from this quick introduction of our lead character?

We’re introduced to two of Chase’s friends, Jenna and Tj. The trio drive down the highway and Chase eventually remarks about being “Unbalanced” with just the three of them.

Is there anything we can learn about how Chase describes about his friends here?

A short discussion later and we’re met with the game’s first choice: How the main character feels about the journey.

How impactful do you think a choice so early, with so little information could be? Why would the author put something as potentially impactful as a choice so early with such little ground work?

Tj Hess and Jenna Begay

The trio settle into the motel room and another character is introduced, Carl Hendricks.

Flynn Moore

and Leo Alvarez

What’s happening to Chase here and why would someone need to call him out from his thoughts?

The group carry on into the afternoon and eventually snap a group photo, the game’s first CG

What insight does this nightmare give to earlier events? Does this event cause any tone shifts from what was previously established?

--------

That concludes the first Book Club for this week! Thanks for reading and I hope to have a fun and hearty discussion with everyone in the replies!

For next week, we are reading all of ‘Sunday’, until the following Day Card:

Be sure not to forget to check out this poll HERE to vote on whose route we’ll start in two weeks, and again feel free to ready ‘Sunday’ before voting if you’re not sure yet! Thank you again to anyone participating and remember to keep spoilers to the Spoiler Post HERE!

#furry visual novel book club #zombie book club #echo vn

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bibliophilicwitch · 4 years ago

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I need to layout my reading plans because I have started too many and want to read too many immediately. Generally speaking, I prefer audiobooks because it allows me to multitask, but I cannot always get an audiobook so I like to have one fiction audiobook and one nonfic audiobook in addition to picking up physical/ebooks up to one fiction and one nonfiction.

Upon a Burning Throne by Ashok K Banker; fiction audiobook; [Started during AAPI Month; it had been on my radar for quite some time and I watched a new review that pushed me to pick it up. Unfortunately, while the style of writing feels like a classic epic legend and is often quite lyrical, this style has never been a favorite of mine because I never get the emotions I depend on to enjoy a book so this long-ass book is taking forever and I do not think I am likely to pick up the sequels.]

The City We Become by NK Jemison; fiction audiobook [Everyone sings Jemison's praises, but I've found that for me her style isn't far off from literary fantasy which always feels distant from the characters and makes it difficult to connect and feel for them. The premise of The City We Become really piqued my interest because it plays into my animism and the discussions of chaos magic and pop-culture magic. Unfortunately, I didn't read it fast enough and it returned on me with another month's wait until I can get it back.]

Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie; fiction physical book [Picked this up to have a physical book only for City We Become to become available for check out, so it ended up being ignored. I had high hopes of finishing this trilogy over Memorial Day weekend. lmao] -> Ancillary Sword -> Ancillary Mercy [The rest of this series I can easily attain in audiobook, so once I finish the first I can binge them quick... eventually.]

Learning Curves by Ceillie Simkiss; fiction ebook [I should'nt've started this fluffy, short queer romance until I had finished at least Ancillary Justice, but I just needed an ace romance to kick off Pride Month and then I got overwhelmed by everything I'm reading. Also there's very little plot and no real forward momentum so I'm a bit disappointed?] -> Beyond the Black Door by AM Strickland; fiction physical [Dark YA fantasy with an asexual main character and a villain romance. Sounds like a good Pride Month read!] -> How to be a Normal Person by TJ Klune; fiction ebook [Moooooore ace-queer romance! By the TJ Klune!]

Urban Magick: A Guide for the City Witch by Diana Rajchel; nonfiction ebook [Started this during Memorial Day weekend thinking I would finish it and fell to a crawl after getting back from vacation. It has an interesting take on city magic and spirituality, but I'm not sure it really meshes with my personal practice, so I am kinda ambivalent on this one.] -> Library Marketing Basics by Mark Aaron Polger; nonfiction physical [Over the summer my position at my library is transitioning from adult programming to marketing and social media and while I have good grounding in navigating social media platforms, I do not have formal education in marketing for a non-profit business. I have about five books that specifically focus on library marketing that I will be starting to read with this one being highly recommended as a place to start. My physical reading is going to be tied up in professional development for a while since none of the titles I am looking at are available in audio format.] -> Marketing Your Library: Tips and Tools That Work by Carol Smallwood; nonfiction ebook -> The Accidental Library Marketer by Cordelia Anderson; nonfiction physical book

Of Blood and Bones: Working with Shadow Magick and the Dark Moon by Kate Freuler; nonfiction audiobook [So many occult books right now and I'm not super stoked to keep picking this one up rn so it may be set aside to be picked up at a later date.] -> The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality by Julie Sondra Decker; nonfiction audiobook -> An Indigenous Peoples' History of the United States by Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz -> The Color of Law: A Forgotten History of How Our Government Segregated America by Richard Rothstein

Okay, lots of notes. I'm going to check back in at the end of the weekend. Hopefully I'll have finished a couple of books so I feel a bit more in control of my reading and less overwhelmed by all the books I picked up and put back down.

#text #personal #reading related

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seiteumseite · 3 years ago

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Reading Year 2021: The Second Half

For an overview of the first half of the year, click here.

It’s official, I’ve read 23 books this year, which is a fantastic result considering my previous couple of years… Here’s a quick overview of the ten books I read from July through December!

◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌ JULY 2021 ◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] Darius the Great Is Not Okay by Adib Khorram

As someone who also grew up between two cultures, this book was extremely relatable. And as a bonus, I could learn more about Iran and what live is like there. Although it was a bit exhausting to read the story from Darius’ perspective, I still really enjoyed myself.

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] A Heart in a Body in the World by Deb Caletti

Love how the story unfolded little by little. A powerful, important book, especially in the current modern time. Maybe a little slow here and there, but inspirational and motivational nonetheless.

[☆ ☆] Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

I really REALLY didn’t like the writing style. I thought I’ll get used to it eventually, but unfortunately, that never happened. There are too many weirdly specific descriptions. The way the dialogue was written also wasn’t for me. It’s also repetitive, and on top of all I couldn’t connect to the characters. I liked the plot idea though; the concept is very intriguing. I think this would work much better as a movie or a short tv show for me.

◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌ AUGUST 2021 ◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌

[☆ ☆ ☆] On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong

This one simply wasn’t for me. I’m probably too straightforward and/or too impatient to enjoy a poetic writing style. I also felt extremely disconnected from the characters. That being said, I understand why people like it, and just because I didn’t connect with it doesn’t mean it’s a bad book. I loved parts of it, and there were many beautifully written paragraphs.

◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌ SEPTEMBER 2021 ◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune

I read this book for the first time in January of this year, so this is the first re-read already. Finally, I was able to annotate because I bought a physical copy! Loved it just as much as the first time. I think this will be my comfort read for a long time.

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] The Poet X by Elizabeth Acevedo

This story is written in verse, so I was a bit concerned as it’s not something I’m familiar with, but I had zero trouble with it. It’s very straightforward and easy to follow. There are many gorgeous quotes, and although I wasn’t interested in all aspects of the story, I still loved reading it.

◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌ OCTOBER 2021 ◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] Under the Whispering Door by TJ Klune

Even though The House in the Cerulean Sea quickly became one of my all-time favorite books, I went into this story with no expectations. I think TJ Klune really shines when it comes to characters; they feel very warm and welcoming. Unfortunately, I wasn’t sold on the character development of our main character in this book, and I only liked some parts of the plot. But overall, I loved returning to this enchanting story every time I opened the book again. Also: Hugo gets a 5/5 from me. What a gem.

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz

My second re-read of this book. I last read it six years ago – time really flies… Since the sequel was coming out this month, I thought it was the perfect opportunity to dive (heh...) back into the world of Ari and Dante, and I enjoyed my stay just as much as the other two times. Still an all-time favorite!

◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌ NOVEMBER 2021 ◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌

…

◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌ DECEMBER 2021 ◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌.。.:*・°◌

[☆ ☆] Aristotle and Dante Dive Into the Waters of the World by Benjamin Alire Saenz

It’s not like I expected this book to be as good as its predecessor, I really didn’t. But wow. What a letdown still. I was bored half of the time and really had to push myself to finish it. It was too repetitive, had too many unnecessary new characters, the protagonist felt very different from before, the plot seemed to be all over the place, and, worst of all, I just didn’t feel anything while reading. I’m kinda sad that I didn’t like it. However, it doesn’t change my love for the first book, that one is still one of my all-time faves!

[☆ ☆ ☆ ☆] The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation Vol. 1 by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

My first light novel ever. This one is hard to rate, mostly because I already know the story well, seeing as I fell completely in love with it this year through other formats. So, I’m not going into this unbiased. While I enjoyed this first volume immensely, I do have some issues, mostly regarding the pacing (not enough action, too much background information) and the writing style (a lot of telling and not enough showing). Also, a book with 350+ pages to only be divided into seven chapters is not ideal, at least not for me. That being said, I love the humor, I LOVE THE ILLUSTRATIONS – A BIG SHOUTOUT TO THE ILLUSTRATOR, I love the main characters, I love the side characters, I love the plot, I even love the more casually written parts with multiple exclamation marks and whatnot, and thus, I could never rate it anything less than 4 stars!

Just as I expected after my midway-post, I took it slower in the second half of the year when it came to reading books. I was aiming for one book per month on average, which I exceeded a little bit. If I can keep this pace for 2022, I’ll be very satisfied!

- Annie

#annies book year #darius the great is not okay #a heart in a body in the world #before the coffee gets cold #on earth we're briefly gorgeous #the house in the cerulean sea #the poet x #under the whispering door #aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe #aristotle and dante dive into the waters of the world #the grandmaster of demonic cultivation

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nano--raptor · 5 years ago

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Plea

Pairing: Bi!TJ Hammond x Female Therapist!Reader

Word count: 3k

Summary: TJ comes to you in a moment of weakness because he doesn’t know where else to go.

Warnings: Angst, mild panic attack, kissing, oral (male rec), sex, smut, soft smut, light bondage, some fluff, feelings etc

A/N: written for @the-ss-horniest-book-club , inspired by the prompt below from @littledarlinhavefaithinme. Huuuge thank you to Allie @hawksmagnolia for all the help and support on this one, helping me with plot points, and making this lovely moodboard. ❤️❤️ TJ is a soft precious bby and I love him, and I'll be definitely be writing more parts for this💕

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Amber light streamed into the car from the street lamps above as TJ gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles, trying to calm his racing heartbeat. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been sitting here, parked just down the street from her house, at nearly one in the morning. His mind wouldn’t stop running, he didn’t even remember the drive here, which added to his panic. He couldn’t think, he couldn’t focus, he felt pulled in a thousand directions. He forced himself to look at her house, to notice the details about the roof, the porch, the shrubs that lined the pathway down to the street. It was familiar, he’d walked that path before.

This time, however, he couldn’t get himself to move.

“Go, fuck,” he hissed into the darkness. He hated himself right now, how he couldn’t even get out of the goddamn car on his own. Pathetic.

“Fucking go, you coward!”

Squeezing his eyes shut, he finally got himself to release the wheel, wrenched the door open and scrambled out of the car, slamming the door behind him. He took off towards the house and didn’t stop running until he reached the front door, hammering the doorbell several times before he could stop himself and run away.

Then he waited. Fidgeting, panting, closing his eyes again and clenching his fists.

Help me.

-----

“Coming! Hold on!”

You hurried down the hall towards your front door, pulling a robe over your sleep shirt and shorts, cursing whoever was frantically ringing your doorbell at 1am. Yanking the door open, the rant died on your lips and you were shocked to see TJ standing there, of all people. He was a mess; red eyes, dishevelled hair, looking hopeless and on the verge of panic.

“TJ? Oh my god, what are you doing here?”

“I-I didn't know where else to go…” his voice trailed off, small, defeated, and you reached out to grab his wrist, fearing he might run if you waited even one more second.

You pulled him inside and wrapped your arms around him while he leaned into you, arms hanging down by his sides. You held him tight and stroked his hair, trying to provide comfort.

He'd been here before, outside of your sessions, that's not what surprised you. What surprised you was that he'd shown up here in the middle of the night, completely on his own, out of the blue. It must have been really bad today.

TJ started leaning his full weight against you, and you carefully lowered the both of you down to the floor. He curled up against you and tucked his head under your chin, and you instinctively started rubbing his back. You just held him, and you’re not sure how long you sat there before you could finally feel him starting to relax.

“What do you need, honey? You wanna talk about it?” You kept your voice gentle, soft, not wanting to add to his panic. He shrugged, and you could feel his warm breath and his soft-as-sin lashes against your chest. You held him tighter, trying to shield him from the whole world in your arms.

“It’s safe here,” he finally spoke, so quietly you almost didn’t hear him. “I’m losing control… I can’t stop it.” He sounded so helpless and defeated that your heart was breaking. The fact that he came here, to your house, to you, at his most desperate hour, spoke volumes.

“I’m so glad you came here TJ, I don’t even care what time it is.” You meant it to be soothing, to be a sentiment, but TJ misunderstood, and suddenly pulled sharply away from you.

“Shit. I shouldn’t have come here, this isn’t your burden.” His eyes were wide with panic again and he tried to jump up, but you caught his wrist at the last second and held it with everything you had.

“Stop.” The word came out more biting than you intended, but it worked, stopping him in his tracks. He stared at you, wide-eyed, and your grip on his wrist tightened, pulling him back down to your level. He dropped to his knees and you held his face in your hands, forcing his eyes to meet yours.

“No. You do not get to come to me like this and then take off right away without letting me help you. Let. Me. Help you.” Your eyes flicked back and forth between his, searching, waiting and praying for him to come back to you. TJ was prone to panic attacks and rash decisions, and you were beyond grateful that he’d come here so that you could help him through it. But now, he had to fucking let you help him.

TJ blinked a few times as he processed your words and slowly raised shaking hands to grasp your wrists. A hundred emotions flashed through his eyes before they closed and he leaned into you again, letting out a shuddering breath against your skin.

“I’m just so fucking lost, every goddamn day is a struggle, I’m loosing my grip, I’m exhausted. I - I can't do this anymore.” When you felt hot tears against your skin, that did it for you, and your own tears that had been threatening to fall finally did. You lifted his chin and held his face again, but his eyes flicked away, ashamed of admitting the depth of his struggles to you. As if you hadn’t already known. But this was different, this was raw and real and off the record. This was in the moment.

“Look at me TJ.” Another sharp delivery and his eyes slowly slid up to yours. He looked so defeated. “I’m glad you’re here. Okay? You’re not a burden.”

A beat passed and you held each other's gaze for a moment, your eyes flicking down to his mouth and back, his doing the same, before he was crushing his lips to yours and leaning into you, desperately trying to hold onto something tangible. You kissed him back, all your emotions pouring into it, trying to show him that he did mean something to you, that you cared. He was hurting, but he kissed you with a fervor that was fighting to break free, and you yearned to help him. But you had to keep him from running.

An idea struck you and you pulled back slightly, still cupping his cheek, searching his eyes. He blinked, lips parted and swollen, cupped his hand over yours to keep that connection.

"Do you trust me?" You whispered. You knew he did, it was himself he didn't trust. TJ nodded, and you moved to stand, guiding him to his feet with you. His hand still clasped in yours, you led him down the hall, away from the doors he would normally go through, and up the stairs to your private home. Once inside you closed and locked the door, then turned and pressed your body against him, gently urging him back against the wall. His lips found yours again and his hands circled into your robe and to your waist, fingers gently fumbling around the hem of your shirt. Your breath hitched once he touched your skin, and you let a soft moan escape your mouth, encouraging him.

TJ lifted his hands to your shoulders to push the robe off, and it fell to the floor, along with his jacket. You pulled away briefly to get another look at his eyes and the way he looked back at you, with a spark of hunger, made your stomach flip with excitement. He cupped your cheek again and pulled you back in, almost possessively, and for a moment you were proud of him.

It only lasted a moment though because soon you were both stripping each other’s clothes off, desperate to get hands on skin. When you were down to your underwear you led him to the bedroom and pushed him down onto the bed, then slowly peeled your panties off, hips rolling side to side. TJ's eyes were wide, glued to your movements. You pushed them down your legs and stepped out, bare before him now, crawling onto the bed. You were happy to see that he finally looked a little more relaxed, the tiniest of smirks pulling at the corner of his mouth.

“Do you trust me?” you asked him again. He nodded and responded, his voice hushed but a little more confident.

“Yes.” You leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to his lips before sliding off the bed and moving to grab something out of your dresser. Turning back to face him, you pulled a strand of silky fabric through your hands, letting it glide between your fingers. TJ raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t move, which was a mini win in your mind. You crawled back onto the bed and nibbled your bottom lip, watching his eyes as you straddled his legs.

“Give me your hands,” a gentle command, but TJ obliged without hesitation. You took his hands in yours and slowly wrapped the scarf around his wrists, looping it over and around, binding them together. Your heart was racing, and you wondered if his was too as he watched you work. You raised his hands to your lips and pressed kisses over his fingers, his knuckles, and he followed your movements again with soft eyes. It made your heart leap to see him looking more calm, more relieved, and you couldn’t stop the smile that spread across your face.

You leaned in to kiss him again, urging him back against the pillows as you guide his arms up above his head. His mouth only left yours for a second as he raised them, and you smiled against his lips, wrapping the end of the scarf around your headboard, securing it tightly. You pulled back to examine your work and TJ bit his lip as he tested the binding, pulling at it just a little bit. You both smiled, yours slightly more devious, but you could see the spark in his eyes and it made your heart soar. If you could help him navigate the darkness by finding a way to get him out of his own head, you were more than happy to try.

“Are you comfortable, sweetheart?” You cupped his cheek and stroked it gently with your thumb, and TJ nodded, leaning into your touch again, nibbling his lip in anticipation. You trailed your fingers up his arm to test the bindings, gently fingering the silk, ghosting your fingers over his skin. Goosebumps were forming already from your light touches, and you looked forward to making him feel even better. You kissed him once more and he was hungry for it, licking into your mouth, gentle moans rumbling up from his chest.

You trailed kisses over TJ’s jaw, to his throat, lingering over his pulse point before continuing downward. Gentle kisses along his collar bones, over his chest and down his stomach, abs flexing under your light touches. He moaned again, the sweetest sound, it was soft and needy and it shot straight to your core. You were trying to put his needs and care before your own, but you couldn’t deny your desire for him either, TJ was charming and downright gorgeous, and had a knack for making a partner feel like they were the most important person in the world.

As you trailed your lips further down, fingers ghosting along his sides, he started squirming, whimpering as your tongue traced along his hips. You peeked back up at his face, his eyes were closed, lips parted, and he looked perfectly beautiful. Hooking your fingers into the waistband of his boxers, you slid them down over his hips and out of the way, finally freeing his cock from its confines. He squirmed more as you teased him, your lips going everywhere except where he needed you. He was murmuring and rolling his hips, trying to get your mouth on him, and when you finally licked a hot stipe up the underside of his cock he whined loudly and his back arched off the bed.

“Ahh, fuck baby, yes…” You took him all the way into your mouth now, and his eyes shot open with a gasp, before he dropped his head back to the pillow with another moan. He tugged on the binding, arms flexing deliciously, and you felt him twitch in your mouth, loving that boundary set for him. You knew he wanted to touch you, any time you’d had him in your mouth before his hands always ended up tight in your hair, and while you longed for his hands on you now, you knew this limit was good for him. He’d come to you tonight begging for your help, and while this maybe wasn’t what he’d had in mind, it was keeping him occupied and keeping his mind out of that dark place. You’d tie him up and hold him tight as much as he needed if it meant he felt safe.

You hummed around him and swallowed him down until he bumped against the back of your throat and the sound it pulled from him was fucking music to your ears. Sure he’d bared his soul to you before, but the vulnerability he’d show in the bedroom always made your heart melt. You swirled your tongue around him as you moved your mouth up and down the length of his cock and you could tell he was close. Speeding up your motions you smoothed your hands up his thighs and along his sides, then dragged your nails gently back down the planes of his stomach. Soon TJ started mumbling under his breath and seconds later he tensed all over with a gasp and shot his hot climax straight down your throat. Moaning around him, practically purring, you grasped his hips and dug your fingertips in, holding him tight, milking him for everything he had as he rode out the waves of his orgasm.

Pulling off him gently, TJ’s eyes fluttered open and he looked utterly spent. Flushed cheeks and chest, he was panting and sweaty, his eyes followed the motions of your tongue along your lips as you liked them clean. He pulled on the bindings again with a whine, trying to reach out and touch you, grunting in frustration.

“You okay sweetheart?” You crawled over him again to press your lips to his, voice dripping sweetness as you checked in on him. He kissed you back, hungry, desperate, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth as a tiny show of defiance. You pulled back and smirked at him, lightly patting his cheek. “Answer me honey.”

“Yeah baby,” he croaked, his eyes still hungry. His hips rolled up against yours and you smiled, sitting upright, splaying your hands on his chest. You wanted him as badly as he wanted you, and while you wanted to tease him more and make him squirm, you were aching for more of him.

“What do you want sweetheart?”

“I want you,” TJ gasped, clenching his hands into fists. “I need you. Please baby.” You nearly purred out loud as he started begging.

“Oh honey, you want me so bad don’t you?” You cupped his cheek and your heart soared as he nuzzled into it, nodding and looking up at you through his lashes, his plea barely a whisper.

“Please…”

Oh god. He looked so beautiful and needy and he was absolutely loving being tied down. Looking at him sent a fresh spark straight to your core and you backed your hips right onto his needy cock without being able to wait another second.

TJ tried to hold eye contact, he really did, but as soon as you moved your hips down and your dripping wetness slid around his cock he couldn’t help the desperate, carnal moan that tore from his throat. His hips bucked hard into yours and his back arched and it was so hot that you wanted to remember this, the way he looked beneath you, as long as you lived. You started rocking your hips, angling them so he’d reach as deep as he could and soon you were both writhing and moaning and it was glorious. Throwing your head back you ground down on him, your moans and his both filling the room. Nothing else mattered in this moment, you controlled the pace and the pressure and it was exactly what you both needed.

“Baby,” TJ’s shuddering voice drew you back and folded over him, bracing yourself on one arm and carding your hand through his hair with your other. He was close again - so were you - and you held his gaze until his head dropped back again and his eyes fell closed, burying your face in his neck as he came with a shuddering gasp that trailed off into a moan. Even with his wrists bound above his head, TJ writhed and moaned and bucked his hips into you as he rode through his climax and it was enough to push you over the edge too. Wrapping your arms around his neck you whined into his ear, wrapping yourself around him, needing him as much as he needed you in that moment.

The two of you lay panting, trying to catch your breath. You rolled over to your side and reached up to undo the scarf from the bedframe, but left it wrapped around TJ’s wrists for the moment. You pulled him close and he brought his hands down to stroke your cheek, sighing at the relief of finally being able to move his arms.

“How you doin’?” you whispered, wrapping your leg over his hip and stroking his cheek, and then his back. His eyes flicked between yours and he looked satisfied, comfortable.

“‘M so good, baby, thank you.” His voice was soft, heavy with sleep already. He reached to kiss your lips, and it was soft and gentle and full of feeling, the kind reserved for lovers. Your heart flip flopped again and you pulled the blanket up around you both, content to drift off to sleep with him safe in your arms.

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