#til london
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what's your heart's desire ?
#fl.tgub#fl ocs#fallen london#my art#just rotating some thoughts#waiting to play the account til january
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Fallen leaves realize they are no friend of autumn
#visage: my art#fallen london oc#fallen london#the sacrificial saint#new flondon oc dropped :) he has no account yet tho bc im waiting til i do McKenna’s more
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Haha… ha… ha
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I think Mizu should be allowed to start the great fire of London also
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And thus, with the passing of 24 hours, Caeru's ambition truly comes to an end. Major Nemesis spoilers below the cut- we're talking endgame ambition business here. Mostly on a character RP front.
The Doomed Scientist made quite a few... choice decisions, in the end. Killing Cups once and for all, recording his story as one of grief-
And sparing what little remained of Mr Mirrors, leaving it free to roam Parabola as it sees fit.
Some of them, he can explain. Others, he's still left to feel... discontent.
Cups needed to die. That much was certain from the start. It was a tyrant, as all Masters are, and complicit in the bargaining and eventual destruction of four (potentially five) cities, as all Masters are. It was an obstacle. A murderer. A petty monster that felt no remorse even on its deathbed, and it went out of its way to ruin multiple lives just because it felt owed its own sick and twisted idea of revenge.
It killed his first love. It looked him in the eyes and he knew what it had done and he knew from the start it was going to die.
Perhaps, in the end, it knew too. And yet it still pleaded, and wanted to live, and-
It made a bargain.
A bargain Caeru didn't take.
Not because he didn't want to. Gods, he wanted to. He wanted it. He wanted it more than anything else in the world. To have Greylu back, to give him the gift of life, of love, to show him the wonders of the Neath and the beauty of the correspondence and all of the people Caeru has met and loved and found home with along the way-
But. He couldn't.
Because Cups was a monster. And no matter what, it deserved to die. And he could not, in good conscience, allow it to live.
Even if sparing it meant everything he's ever wanted.
So he's left here, now. With a bloodied traveling coat, and a bloodsoaked knife, and a favor finally fulfilled.
And nothing to live for. No resurrected lover, no charming visits to Helicon, no slow dances in the living room, no memories to rebuild and lives to live and he won't live again-
Nothing. All he has is a coat born of obligation, not to his love, but to people he's never even met. To lives he's never even touched. To a paramour, still alive, with hair of rose-pink, who doesn't even remember her own brother's existence.
Cups didn't die for Caeru's sake. Cups died for the sake of all who wanted it dead. For the revenger's court, and the ghost screaming in his ear, and the reckoning that will not be postponed indefinitely.
And Caeru, who acted as a tool to carry out their wills? Who all but betrayed his own lover, just to satisfy a cause he never knew existed?
All Caeru is left with, is regret. Regret-
-And grief.
#yin-thoughts#fallen london#fallen london spoilers#nemesis spoilers#so! nemesis huh!#i have. a lot of thoughts#overall i think heart's desire remains closest to my heart#but that's almost certainly bc of the obvious ''you always remember your first'' bias#there's a lot of problems with nemesis that have been talked to death by other people way more eloquently than i could ever express#(the big notable stopgates littered throughout. the weird pacing at the end. the fact you never meet your actual nemesis til the finale)#but overall i still liked it a lot!! i loved it actually!!! it singlehandedly made me like cups as a master!!!!#not because of anything nemesis actually DID mind you. i just really liked making up things about it#in place of nemesis. actually featuring it.#which could either be a plus or a minus against the ambition depending on what angle you look at it from#but. yeah. i'd say i enjoyed it. i enjoyed it a whole bunch#and now that ive played 2 out of the 4 ambitions and my FL hyperfixation evidently isnt letting up#it's safe to say we're all here for the long haul#tune in (insert miscellaneous time in the future) for when i finally after like a year and a quarter#get to find out what the fuck truly goes down in light fingers#and also keep an eye out for that caeru-centric fic ive been unsubtly alluding to and still need to write.#ive got a whole outline for it and it's. well#you'll all see when (if?) i finish it#i have some ideas abt how i wanna play around with the nemesis endings + what they mean to caeru#(and i do mean endings as in both of them)#and it all may seem. insane. when we get there#but i swear i have a direction plotted in my head#i swear#scoundrelventures#<- the scoundrel isnt mentioned At All in this post but that works as a general FL oc lore tag
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JAN VERTONGHEN & MOUSA DEMBÉLÉ
Exclusive interview with Jan Vertonghen | allthatconfetti on LiveJournal | Stand by Me (1986) | Jan Vertonghen and Mousa Dembele speak about their friendship | Jan Vertonghen’s Instagram | “Way Back When” by Kodaline | sightofsea’s post | Belgian Red Devils answer fan questions | Away Days by dewinter | le-rire-des-etoiles’ post | belgianreddevils’ post | sunnygotze’s post | Us Against You (Beartown, #2) by Fredrik Backman
#mousa dembele#jan vertonghen#my edit#web weaving#tottenham hotspur#spurs#belgium nt#janmousa#tag: favs#this is so self indulgent bc#idk if anyone else is as insane as i am about them#but they are everything to me#i just think about how they grew up playing together#one of them always leaving#but eventually they kept coming back to each other right til the very end#coming up in the same club in belgium#both moving to amsterdam and living across the street from each other#both moving to london and living a few blocks from each other#now both back in belgium#their whole history together is in cycles#everything about their careers are so intertwined you can never speak about one of their achievements without the other#these two being part of belgium’s golden generation and spurs’ best squad in years#them growing up together and now their kids growing up together#and the way they express their love for each other is so sweet#i can’t even express how deep their history is and what their friendship means to me#how blessed they are to have each other#no one asked but the art next to the blurb abt jan scoring his first goal for ajax against mousa literally knocked my socks off bc#the colour kits they were wearing were red and blue like the painting#i thought it was so cute#football
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I got so carried away at this Passion Pit show--second time after their 2013 NYC show!--that I'll be such a sleepyhead tomorrow as I take a walk to work with my voice shot but I'll be alriiiiiight be aaaallright 🎶🔥😌🔥🎶
(Also maybe it was my ears being shot some but I didn't think I was so audible singing while hearing this back 😅 not sorry tho)
#ore no kao#my pics#passion pit#nyc#irving plaza#hooooly fuck it's been so longggg#and since 2013 i listened to so much gossamer easily one of my top albums#but also hooooly fuck my voice will be shot tmrw lmao#[also rip me getting to meet a cute English guy who came all the way here from London just to see them that maybe seemed like we vibed#but forgot to get his name as he split after the show lol#only in town til tmrw anyway but he was v cute and we jammed so hard lol]#[watching the clips back i hear me chatting with him here/there too lol
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okay but does anyone listen to bronski beat and does anyone GET IT. they released an album, completely unashamedly gay, in the 80s, during the AIDS crisis, during a time of insanely rampant homophobia and over the top conservatism. they released an album with the age of consent for homosexual activity in every european country listed on the sleeve and the phone number for a legal advice hotline for queer people etched into the grooves of the vinyl. they released an album with the opening track dedicated to a hate crime victim, featuring vocals from an openly gay choir. they released an album with songs about homophobic violence, the dangers of following the bible too closely, about leaving behind everything you know and starting over, about homophobic family and homophobic bullying. they wrote about being gay and being proud of it and knowing that there is nothing wrong with who you are. in the face of all the hatred going on in the 80s they released an album that was in-your-face gay and fuck-you queer, and i love them for it.
(see original tags for a lot more commentary)
#bronski beat#for reference : the album is The Age Of Consent#the man the opening track “Why ?” was dedicated to was Drew Griffiths (who according to wikipedia was a#playwright who was victim to a homophobic murder in 1984)#and the choir was The Pink Singers (an openly gay men’s choir in London)#and like yeah. i know this very much centers gay men HOWEVER . considering everything like the time period and#how songs that would’ve been lesbian (see: Voices Carry by Til Tuesday) being basically straight-washed. and also how rampant homophobia wa#(so getting anything even a little gay released was hard bc it was likely to get smashed down by record stores and companies and#radio stations and music reviewers. and us ones particularly )#in this case i don’t care whatsoever and besides they did something absolutely monumental for the whole community if you ask me#as a lesbian i am literally so grateful that this exists and i wasn’t even alive at the time. even now it makes me feel seen.#i cant even imagine what it would’ve been like for a queer kid in the 80s to hear that and maybe know they weren’t alone#so in conclusion: bronski beat i love you forever and jimmy somerville i love you forever
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Canary Wharf Station, Frobisher Passage. London, February 2024.
Shot with Fujifilm X-T20 with XF 23mm f/2.0 lens.
#yzshot#travel#street photography#street#fujifilm#london#til#transportation#transportcore#urban#urbancore#urban photography#station#uk#england#passage#fujifilm x series#british#fujifilm xt20#photography#original photographers#travel photography#winter#rainy#wintercore
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btw everyone STOPPPP talking about I saw the tv glow until I can watch it and have a violently cathartic experience THANK you!
#comes to sundance london in june so we're not getting it in cinemas til after that at least :/#would loveeee to go to sundance if it wasn't for the time and distant and the having an exam smack in the middle#and having no one to go with and no means of transportation. but CONCEPTUALLY I'm already there...
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I'M SO FECKING STUPID.
I threw Walraven into the "crisis of faith" pit before even making significant progress in ANY of the actual main storylines in The Silver Tree so now I can just imagine him dragging himself through the Official Mission and Covert Mission like "I am still a totally devout Christian I swear the weird dreams haven't gotten to me I'm fine I am not tired out of my mind".
#📔 - WRITTEN JOURNAL#Fallen London#The Silver Tree#this poor ambassador has so much shite ahead of him#you think you've reached your limit? haha. Haaahahha wait 'til you get through the Actual Plot™#WELLAWAYYYYY#throwing him at a wall as this sopping wet plush#they CAN'T CATCH A BREAKKK
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this was not unprecidented but its so goddamn funny. goodbye scrimshander!!!!!!!!!!!
#fl ocs#t6fs#fallen london#failbetter games#fl.twitch#this is from thursday but its still so funny to me#its STILL in the colonies btw#im too busy to sit and grind down my scandal and i have no good favors#my opp cards have been bad rng#so im just waiting til my day off#which means scrim gets to rot for a week
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til ære for Carl Mørck i min wip der prøver at holde op med at ryge og derfor konstant tygger på läkeroler med salmiaksmag har jeg købt en 2-pak med hjem
#den kostede 35kr og det var ikke engang til lufthavnspriser. det var bare nede i den lokale spar#ja jeg sidder i flyet til London og venter på at vi er færdige med at boarde#jeg er godt nok træt#afdeling q#sorry hvis det er tag spam#dansk
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🕯️ Prayer circle for the mooncat polish I just ordered not to explode in transit or when I get it or while using it or just in general 🕯️
#i keep seeing stuff about bottles breaking and people getting cut by the glass but oh my GOD that siren collection#i need a fucking display… thing. i’m never gonna financially recover from this#stopping biting your nails is all well and fucking good until you get addicted to nail polish and you have expensive tastes#i couldn’t have been into essie or rimmel london could i? nooooo it had to be holo taco#(i can’t say i’m addicted to mooncat til i try it)#i would’ve waited til christmas but my grandma randomly gave me money and i don’t have pressing expenses so why not#i have also kicked the weed habit. i mean kind of. i have edibles on the way but the craving’s gone. it’s the oddest thing#like it’ll be nice to have these edibles but i won’t be ordering more for a While after these. i’m talking like six months or more#i’m gonna be asking everyone for HT and mooncat gift cards for christmas#and rainbow connection maybe. i haven’t tried any of their polishes yet but they donate to good causes and i appreciate that#i just don’t like when my nails are bald lol. they’re getting stained and they’re SO sharp bald#i need like 57 options and i’ll be happy#personal
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going to london to see turner paintings :)
#not til next week but! I've been wanting to since my birthday in march when they were closed so I'm v excited#also going to buy some fabric while I'm there for sewing :) I'm going to try (operative word) to make some breeches#also might see my london aunt if she's around#thoughts#oh AND I got the whole return ticket for only 8 pounds total so I'm smug abt that
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merry christmas to you too, spices :)
#i hope everyone else is also bracing themselves for when the wines noman visits tomorrow#and the scoundrel will be expectedly. um.#the scoundrel.#yin-thoughts#fallen london#for those who have never played FL during christmas before: from now til jan 5th there's a new daily visit from mr sacks#everyone's favorite definitely real definitely legitimate definitely not made of lacre master#dont forget to get all of your advent calendar goodies as well if you havent already!!
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