#though not him so mich i guess

[theskyexists]

Maybe both is true. Maybe society primes boys to be susceptible to misogyny rabbit hole, and also the rhetoric is so readily superior and also people long for power and belonging, and also considering all of that these alt-right rabbit hole cases did choose to invest heavily in the man good woman bad system. It is after all, a choice. And on the other hand maybe nobody on the left talks to boys. But maybe they don't have anything to say?

[augustinewrites]

[twenty-two minutes to midnight]

hange zoe is a special brand of stupid. 

at least that’s what levi thinks as his friend says, stupidly, “if neither of us are kissing anyone at midnight, i guess i’ll have to kiss you, levi.” 

levi ackerman makes it his special mission to be as far as possible from his friend before the clock strikes 12. when it comes to hange, his ever-scowling lips are for critical judgment and insults only. 

“pass,” he scoffs, rolling his eyes when they pout at him. 

“but what about all those times you asked me how to—”

“this conversation is over,” he deadpans, emphasizing his point by walking away. 

but levi has learned long ago that there’s no walking away from hange. they drags themselves up and away from the table to follow, throwing a heavy arm around his shoulders. “why not though? are you planning on kissing someone else tonight?”

their tone is teasing, but their eyes give them away. hange’s fishing for a specific answer. 

“no,” he answers much too quickly to be nonchalant.

his friend just smirks. “she’s here, you know. erwin said she just got back a few weeks ago.”

“i had no idea.” (he already knew.)

“she’s still single.”

“i don’t care.” (he might care.)

they hum thoughtfully. “so you wouldn’t mind if i kissed her instead?”

levi doesn’t answer this time, shoving his friend’s arm off his shoulder and trying to disappear into the party. 

erwin’s parties were always too big, in his opinion. he packed his penthouse apartment to the brim, and how anyone had this many friends, he had no idea. at least the sheer amount of people would allow him the opportunity to slip away, maybe hide in some quiet corner wearing a scowl that could repel the bravest souls.

(and if he hides, there’s no way he’ll run into you, right?)

[twelve minutes to midnight]

by merely thinking of you, levi’s mother would probably say he was tempting fate. his mother was almost always right, loathe as he was to admit it.

because, yeah, it’s barely twenty minutes later when he spots you across the room, sipping champagne while chatting with miche and hange. 

you have your back to him, but he knows that it’s you. it’s instinct— the way his eyes linger down the familiar shape of your body. he traces each curve draped in blue silk the way his hands once did.

levi could go over there. he could tell you that you look gorgeous in that dress. he could tell you that he misses you, needs you, loves you…

but then miche would make that face, and hange would fail to bite back that smile, and levi would have to block both their numbers and all their social media accounts again. 

he could tell you these things, but he’s never figured out how. levi likes to handle things on his own and refuses to show weakness to anyone. 

so he turns on his heel and heads in the opposite direction instead, towards the kitchen to look for a drink. he wasn’t really one for alcohol, but he needed it tonight. 

he’s frowning over the various bottles when erwin appears, a knowing grin on his face. he has a habit of materializing out of nowhere when levi’s at his weakest.

“looking for anything in particular?” the blond asks. 

“just a beer,” he mutters. 

erwin hums, contemplative, then lists various drinks. “let’s see. there are have craft brews, ipa, winter wheat—”

levi makes a face. when the fuck did beer get complicated? “what the hell is a winter wheat?”

“it’s beer, levi,” he chuckles, shooting him an amused look. it lasts a second too long, and is followed by, “you saw her, didn’t you?”

“what does that have to do—”

“are we talking about levi’s love life?”

“no, we’re not,” levi snaps, shooting miche a warning glare that his dumb friend chooses to ignore. 

“come on, we’ve known about your crush for years now,” the man continues, judging him slightly. “remember when you got drunk on hange’s birthday?”

“ah, yes,” erwin sighs, as if he’s recalling a particularly fond memory. “when you announced that you sorely missed—”

“oh my god. i hate my life,” levi mutters, turning on his heel and making his escape as the two grown men giggle like schoolgirls. he grabs the most expensive looking bottle of liquor, yanking the cork out and tossing it onto the counter. 

“maybe you’ll hate your life less if you get laid!”

levi flips them both off before slipping out onto the balcony, content to hide out here until the countdown is over. the door slowly slides shut behind him, muffling the mellow music and cheery laughter inside. 

he sets the bottle he’d swiped on the parapet, looking out at the twinkling city lights. these parties were much too suffocating, full of bright-eyed people that seemed keen on conversing with him no matter how reproachful his gaze. 

he doesn’t turn around when he hears the door slide open and shut behind. he already knows who’s followed him outside.

winter here provides a crisp cool, but levi doesn’t mind, slipping his suit jacket off and tossing it onto a patio chair. you don’t seem to mind it either, bare back pressed against the parapet as you smile over at him.

“you didn’t say hello,” you murmur, leaning towards him. levi steals a glance at you, eyes wandering down the column of your neck to the tempting plunge of your neckline. 

“hey,” he grunts, holding out the bottle he’d swiped in offering.

you accept it, taking a small sip. your face immediately pinches in displeasure, causing levi’s to crack with a small grin. 

“how’s your night?” you ask out of nowhere. 

“bored,” he answers stiffly, scuffing the toe of his shoe against the patio. “though i don’t suppose you actually care.”

you chuckle at that, your amusement barely audible over the breeze. you both know that’s not true. “just making conversation.”

“you’re pretty shit at it.”

the air between you both is suddenly hot, but levi shivers at the brush of your fingers against the corded muscle of his arm. your touch burns like fire across his skin as you murmur,

“shut me up then.”

his gaze falls to your mouth, pulse thundering in his ears as he leans forward and closes the distance. levi moves on instinct, locking a hand around your hip and pulling you closer. he swallows your surprised gasp with a kiss, but you don’t pull away.

he kisses you softly at first, each touch and movement of his mouth hesitant as he tests your boundaries. your hands move up his chest, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt collar and somehow pulling him closer, kissing him back with a fervor that makes him dizzy. your insistent mouth parts his lips, sending tremors through his nerves and awakening sensations he wants to feel again. it’s a good kiss. not bad for the first one you share in front of your friends (who are all gathered at the window) announcing your relationship as the clock the strikes midnight.

[kaluaah]

rating attack on men cock with insane writers block

i wish you could add music to posts..id add brat

ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ����་༘���ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

Levi Ackerman 𖹭

Genitalia: Levi’s is on the smaller side, but it’s perfectly proportioned with a slight curve. He’s meticulous about grooming, so it’s always pristine. He’s the type to keep things tidy and controlled, just like his whole persona. Dynamic: Levi’s definitely a top. He’s assertive and precise, and he likes being in control. However, if he really trusts someone and feels relaxed, he might be open to switching. It’s not his default mode, but he can make exceptions.

Erwin Smith 𖹭

Genitalia: Erwin’s is thick and commanding, reflecting his leadership qualities. It’s not just big in size; it’s impressive in presence. He carries himself with confidence, and his genitalia is no different. Dynamic: Erwin is a classic top. He’s used to being in charge and taking control, which extends to his intimate life. He’s confident and decisive, and he knows exactly what he’s doing. You won’t find him hesitating or second-guessing in this area.

Armin Arlert 𖹭

Genitalia: Armin’s is average in size, but it’s sensitive and responsive. He’s a bit self-conscious about it, often overthinking things. Despite that, he’s genuinely sweet and attentive. Dynamic: Armin tends to be a bottom. He’s a bit shy and prefers to let someone else take the lead. However, with the right partner and when he’s feeling more confident, he’s definitely open to switching things up.

Porco Galliard 𖹭

Genitalia: Porco’s is medium-sized and notably thicker. He’s quite proud of it and knows how to use it. It’s not something he hides or downplays; he’s pretty confident about it. Dynamic: Porco is a switch, but he leans more towards topping. He likes being in control and taking charge, though he’s not opposed to switching it up if the mood and the partner are right.

Miche Zacharius 𖹭

Genitalia: Miche’s is notably big, almost intimidating, just like his overall presence. It’s impressive in size and perfectly matches his strong, authoritative demeanor. Dynamic: Miche is definitely a top. He’s assertive and commanding in all aspects of his life, and that includes his intimate moments. He takes charge and knows how to assert his dominance.

Eren Yeager 𖹭

Genitalia: Eren’s is average-sized but has a slight curve. He’s not shy about it and is quite confident. His more intense and driven personality carries over into his intimate life. Dynamic: Eren is a switch, but he leans towards being a top. His energy and assertiveness make him naturally inclined to take control, but he’s also open to switching when he’s in a more relaxed or trusting situation.

Jean Kirstein 𖹭

Genitalia: Jean’s is well-sized and nicely shaped. He’s confident without being arrogant about it. He knows it’s good, and he’s comfortable with himself. Dynamic: Jean is primarily a top. He’s assertive and confident, enjoying being in control. However, he’s also open to switching if he’s with someone he really cares about or feels a strong connection with.

Connie Springer 𖹭

Genitalia: Connie’s is average and straightforward. It’s not particularly standout, but it’s reliable and does the job just fine. He’s easygoing and doesn’t make a big deal out of it. Dynamic: Connie is a total switch. He’s laid-back and goes with the flow, so he’s flexible about his role in bed. He’s comfortable switching things up based on the mood or his partner’s preferences.

Zeke Yeager 𖹭

Genitalia: Zeke’s is bigger than average, and he knows it. He’s a bit cocky about it, which fits his personality. He’s not shy about showing it off. Dynamic: Zeke is a top with a bit of a manipulative edge. He likes being in control and pulling the strings. He enjoys being the one in charge and directing the action.

Reiner Braun 𖹭

Genitalia: Reiner’s is thick and solid, just like his physique. It’s well-matched to his strong and imposing build. Dynamic: Reiner is a switch but tends to be more comfortable as a top. His natural strength and dominant personality make him more inclined to take the lead, though he can definitely switch things up if the situation calls for it.

Bertholdt Hoover 𖹭

Genitalia: Bertholdt’s is larger than he might realize, but he’s a bit shy about it. He’s not fully aware of how impressive it is, but it’s definitely noteworthy. Dynamic: Bertholdt is mostly a bottom. He’s a bit reserved and can be shy, but with the right partner who can boost his confidence, he might be open to switching things up.

ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

m so sorry my writing is bleh as heck!! writing with nails is my hell. do not ask for floch i dont write about 1 inch shrivelled yucky cocks.

ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

[dontexpectmuch]

Hey, Love! If you are still taking requests, I have one! Something along the lines of building one of those Lego bouqets with Jude and maybe having customized Lego characters that both carry around of each other. Such a fan of your works BTW ❤️❤️

side note: i just recently got a lego bouquet gifted for my bday! they are so pretty 🥹

—

“do we need anything else?”

you shake your head as an answer, already eagerly opening the lego box placed in front of you.

jude settled down next to you, eating some of the popcorn from the bowl, while also feeding you a few pieces, his eyes never leaving your excited face. he couldn’t pinpoint what exactly made him feel so good right now as he was looking at you, but that expression on your face, the sparkle in your eyes and your smile that almost reaches your ears, are all reasons he is grateful for taking jobe with him to the mall a few hour ago.

“why don’t you get those lego flowers? everyone loves them.” jobes points to the lego section of the store with his chin, his hands inside his pockets.

“to do what? don’t you think it’s childish?” jude questions, eyebrows drawn together as his body fully turns into the direction of where the section is located.

“i guess it would be a nice gift for an artist, eh? since they already put so mich time into self-made stuff and shit.” jobe explains his thoughts, though he doesn’t really go into it any further, stepping closer to another section in the opposite direction.

without any further ado, jude moves closer to the lego flowers, your face being the only picture in his mind.

“okay, would you like to read the instructions? or should i do it?” your voice cuts him out of his thoughts, making him look back at your face that continues to have a smile on it.

jude takes the instruction papers out of your hand, leaning back on the other. his eyes skim through it as he hums knowingly.

“i guess i’ll read them, you put the pieces together.”

“sure.”

turning back to the different plastic bags in front of your, jude couldn’t help but move closer to you, pressing a kiss on your head. the papers are long forgotten as he sneaks his arm around your shoulder, pulling your body into his.

“should we play with each other first? get a better feeling?” he pushes the blanket off his lap, his lips trailing down your check to your neck.

you sigh, leaning into his touch and moving your head to the side, giving him more access to your neck, “mh, don’t know, jude. maybe finish this first?”

nodding, he pulls away, though the scent of his aftershave still surrounding you.

you put the blanket over your legs, starting to read the first instructions to build your flowers. silence takes a comfortable place in the living room, granting you two a moment to relax and enjoy the presence of one another. scented candles find their way to your nose, dimmed lights and the platter of the rain outside create a small safe haven, only for you to have.

even if you are really happy about the present your boyfriend has given you and you want to focus on it, you can’t help but feel your eyes wander to his direction.

the feeling of adoration settles in your chest, caused by the concentrated look on judes face. his tongue pokes out from his lips, his nostrils are flared, but he looked oh-so good under the dimmed lights, ethereal almost.

“do i have something on my face?” jude looks up from his hands that hold the first stem of the flowers, his eyes wide in question.

smiling, you shake your head, “no, just admired my pretty boyfriend.”

laughing, jude bumps his shoulder against yours, “nah, babe. it’s your prettiness reflecting on me.”

his words make you smile, bumping your shoulder against his this time, “stop being so romantic, it’s making me feel mushy inside, completely ruining my dark and mysterious vibe.”

“i can ruin even more if you’d let me, love.”

you throw your head back, laughing at his attempt, “flowers first, pretty boy.”

“as you wish, captain.”

[abiatackerman]

Red Date

Warnings: Description of sexual arousal (NSFW)

The atmosphere in your office is so calm and peaceful as you work. The day's temperature is comforting also it seems the bugs have also decided not to disturb you today. You keep working as you hum in a peaceful mind until you hear someone calling you by your name.

"Y/N!"

You look up from your paperwork as you hear Levi's stern voice. You were so consumed in your work that you didn't even notice him entering.

"Hey Levi! Sorry, didn't notice you. Need anything?"

You speak, smiling sweetly as always.

"I want to take you out tonight"

Levi says with a straight up blunt tone making you look up at him with shock. His face shows no emotion on it. He stares at you waiting for your answer. Though, on the inside, the nerves and butterflies were going crazy.

"Take out? Where?"

You ask him with shock, confusion and curiosity.

"Dinner. Somewhere with no people. Somewhere nice"

Levi says as he shifts the weight between both his legs. A sign of nervousness.

He is nervous. He has never dated anyone. Hell, he has barely been around women. Yet you are the exception. You're the one he wants to keep, being around and spend time with and never let go.

You smile at his slightly nervous expression.

"Well, I'm free tonight. Also it's boring just to eat the regular bread and soup of the regiment... So why not?"

Levi's eyes brighten when he hears your answer. Yes! You said yes! Yet the excitement is hidden behind a stoic poker face.

"Meet me behind HQ an hour after the sunset."

His words are straight to the point as usual.

"Why behind the hq?"

You ask with confusion.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out"

Levi speaks bluntly as he answers your question simply. You just chuckle.

"Since you saved my life twice... I guess I'll trust you."

Levi nods his head to your answer. His face is still expressionless. Though inside he's happy as hell after knowing that you trust him.

"Now…keep preparing your papers. And don't be late."

Levi says before he turns and leaves the infirmary.

An hour after sunset, as promised, Levi is behind HQ, waiting on you. His usual expression on his face, and his hands shoved into his pockets. A slight look of boredom in his eyes as he waited for you to show up.

Something red catches his eyes and he looks at the gate. His eyes widened slightly seeing you in your red dress. You're wearing a simple round necked wine red dress which reaches upto your knee. As always no makeup on your face without that damn red lipstick of yours. Your hair is tied up in a loose bun, revealing your soft addictive neck.

On the other side, your eyes are widened too. The wholes place is nicely decorated by candles and in the middle there's a red blanket on the green grass which has a table on the corner of it. The table is decorated nicely too. With dinner set and by the smell you can tell it's spaghetti hidden under those legent utensils.

"Levi?"

You look around and gasp again.

"You look beautiful Y/N. Now come, sit."

Levi speaks as he gestured for you to come over to the blanket. His eyes taking you all in.

"Ahhh thank you."

You gasp in shock again as he compliments you. This is the first time you're hearing him calling someone beautiful. You walk towards the blanket and sit down on the chair Levi pulls out for you.

"You know, I thought you wanted no one to know that we're going out. That's why you told me to come here... But I never even imagined these arrangements! How many people helped you?"

Levi shrugs his shoulders before he sits down, across from her. He seems pleased with himself at your expression.

"Four people. Hange included."

Levi says simply and calmly. He gestures to the rose near you, then to the food and wine before them.

"Who are the three others? Erwin is one of em I'm sure... But the other two?

You ask softly, taking the rose and sniffing it.

"Miche and Eld. They're trustworthy. They'll keep their mouth shut. Now, eat. There's plenty to share, and don't even think of complaining about the food, because I won't listen."

You ignore him as you take a deep breath and gather your courage. Leaning forward,  you softly press a kiss on his cheeks, letting your lips linger on his cheek for a bit as you close your eyes and take in his scent. The small gesture is more than enough to light a fire in his lower regions. He gulps as he feels himself getting hard.

Not now, damnit!

He curses himself as his heart beats crazily.

"Now…if you would sit back, we shall eat"

Levi speaks, his mind is reeling.

"Sorry there's uh... Lipstick stains on your cheek."

You speak in an embarrassed and shy tone as your lips are pressed into a thin line and your cheeks are pink.

"It's fine… It'll wash off."

Levi says as he grabs the glass of wine and took a small sip to calm his mind down. He sets the wine down on the edge of the table. His eyes go to the food.

"I wanted to thank you. It's so romantic. I never thought you would do something for me."

You smile shyly as you speak.

"You can thank me properly later. Now eat your food and keep those gorgeous lips off of me until you finish eating. I'm not complaining either way.…"

Levi says as He takes another small sip of wine. You sigh and look up at the sky.

"These types of moments..... In a silent place, in between nature... Heaven."

Levi looks up at the sky as well at your words. It is relaxing. So quiet and pretty. He can forget there are any titans, or people in the outer world who wanted them dead.

Just him, and you.

"Yes…it's nice. To not think or have a worry in the world, even if momentarily…"

"Yeah right. Anyway who cooked them?"

You look at the delicious spaghetti as you ask.

"Eld cooked it. Miche made sure it was cooked right. And no, they didn't spit in the food before they gave it to me. I'm not that cruel for that."

"Spit in the food? That's hilarious, Levi!"

You laugh loudly.

"Shut it. Now eat up. You look like you're about to faint from no food."

He mutters before he pushes a plate full of spaghetti towards you. You roll your eyes.

"You know I don't eat much. I have a petite body. I need a little food."

You say as you take the spaghetti and start eating. Your eyes widened at it's delicious taste. Also not to mention you are hungry.

"You eat like a small bird…"

Levi says as he watches you dig into the food. You furrow your eyebrows.

"Do you want me to eat like a pig and look like a mini elephant?"

You ask as you take another spoonful of spaghetti.

"No, I'm not saying you have to eat like a pig. Just eat a normal meal every once and a while. Learn from Hange and Erwin. They eat like animals."

"Erwin's gonna love to hear that. Eat like an animal? Levi... I really love talking to you. You're funny."

"Just eat. Don't be picky. You're skinny as a stick as it is"

"No, I'm not."

You protest, still smiling. Levi smiles a little too. It is entertaining watching your sarcastic way to get back at him for insulting you. The way you insulted him was cute and bravely to him. When everyone gets scared and despise him because of his rude words, you enjoy them.

He loves it. Addicted to it.....

"You're the only woman I know who's attracted to being insulted by someone."

"You're the only man I know who is attracted to a girl like that."

You talk back, immediately.

"True. I can't imagine other men being attracted to a woman who's as small as a stick"

"I had a lot of men wanting me. You can be sure of it."

Levi raises an eyebrow at your cocky smile.

"Then go ahead. Name them"

Levi says with a pissed tone and a slight expression of jealousy in his face.

"I don't want you to beat them up."

You chuckle as you hold a spoonful of spaghetti in front of his mouth.

"You're not feeding me."

He says as he reaches forward and shoves a large portion of pasta in your mouth so that way you can't speak… Or protest. You groan and gulp the pasta and glare at him.

"It's my turn!"

You say and without any hesitation, you suddenly get on his lap with the spoon.

"What are you doing?"

He asks, as he feels himself getting slightly harder. Not to mention you are sitting right on his bulge. The softness of your ass almost made him moan.

"Feeding you. Say aaaaaa...."

You say as you hold his chin and the spoonful of spaghetti in front of his lips ignoring the large hardened cock under you.

"Aaaa"

Levi opened up his mouth and leaned forward to take the food in. You can't help but laugh loudly as he says "aaaah" sarcastically.

"I just wanted you to open your mouth, fool. Not to say aaaaa..."

You laugh louder.

"Tch, shut it."

"I have a mouth for speaking so I definitely won't stop using it."

You speak and Levi's hands holds your hips in place as he looks at you.

"How about I shut up that mouth of yours?"

Levi says before he crashes his lips against yours in a heated kiss. You smile against his lips and hug his neck and kiss him back passionately. You part your lips as soon as he licks them. His tongue slips inside of your mouth and he deepens the kiss, taking in everything about you. He has been craving this for so long.

His arousal grows and he groans slightly at the feeling of your core pressed against his hard, clothed length. He runs his tongue over every inch of your mouth before he finally breaks the kiss, needing a break for air.

"That should shut you up…"

You breathe heavily as you smile.

"Your mouth is a mess, Levi! With my lipstick... And you're hard."

You say chuckling softly as you take a paper napkin to clean his face.

"Your fault. Not mine. You're the one who straddled my lap and put your lipstick everywhere"

Levi mutters as he looks at you, staring at the way your chest rises with every breath you take.

"Pervert!"

You say shyly, smacking the napkin on his face as you catch him staring at your chest.

"You're the one who's sitting on my hardening member and you're calling me the pervert?"

Levi's breath is hot against your skin as he leans in and places a few hungry, open-mouthed kisses along your neck and shoulders. You chuckle and moan, grab his hair and pull his head backwards to make him look into your eyes.

"I didn't know you were hard when I got in your lap."

You say staring into his eyes as you take the bowl of spaghetti again and get off his lap.

"It's called the hormones of an aroused male. You're wearing red lipstick and a red dress. It's almost like you are begging me to devour you. So don't fucking blame me for getting hard you stupid ass!"

Levi speaks in a frustrated and pissed tone as you just laugh loudly.

Later, after finishing eating and talking about nothing important, you two sit on the blanket. You sit between his legs and lean your back on his chest as you yawn tiredly.

"Levi... I'm really tired. I might fall asleep here, yk..."

You say sighing as you sip your wine.

"We can stay here for a little while longer. Not too long though or else the idiots are going to snoop around"

Levi mutters as he sighs.

"Why do I feel like the brat's are already watching us while blushing and giggling?"

Levi sighs. He can almost hear the little brat's giggles. He has a few ideas of what he would do to them later but now he couldn’t focus on that. Not when the girl of his dreams is pressed up against him and holding his hands.

"Shut it. Stop reminding me that they're probably watching us"

Levi mutters, slightly glaring off to the side before wrapping his arms around her.

"Thank you, Levi. I really enjoyed tonight."

You mumble as you slowly start to doze off in his arms.

"Me too…"

Levi says softly as he stares down at you. He is slightly jealous of your ability to fall asleep so fast. He runs his fingers through your hair and gently plays with the strands.

"Rest up, Doll."

[braxlrose]

PLEASE MAKE 2005 BILL HCS 🙏🏻🙇🏻‍♀️

I based this on the song Ich Bin Nich' Ich from their Schrei album so I hope you enjoy!

content warnings: bill being sad? 😭 lots of angst yk (which if you've been here for a while you'd know I actually LOVE writing angst) idk if this is considered toxic bc the way I've written it, it's very much filled with codependency to like a point where without a person youre suffering so 😬.

summary: bill misses you more than anything right now.

word count: 1.4k

a/n: for this fanfic, you're dating Bill at the time and have been for a little while, and it's set in like 2004/2005. I decided to do this bc Ich Bin Nich' Ich is literally my favorite song from Schrei sooo I can't wait to write this. I'm not sure if anybody else has done this so if they have please tell me! also, lmk if you want to be added to the tag list 💖💖

+ this is from bills perspective

Ich Bin Nich' Ich

meine augen schaun mich müde an und finden keinen trost

I laid down in my bed, my head pounding achingly from tonight's show. Sweat dripped down my forehead and rolled onto my pillow as I turned over. My shallow breathing was catching up to me and my eyes closed ever-so lightly. The cold pillow was a perfect embrace after the show tonight. Well—almost perfect.

My heart twinged with sadness as you came into my head. You always sat in the back of my head like a lingering melody, haunting and sweet. My mind never was able to get fully rid of you, especially now since we're on tour. Your soft and supple hands always seemed to fit perfectly in mine. You're glistening eyes, staring back at me and that enchanting smile that sat flawlessly upon your face. Nothing could ever pull me away from staring at you when we were together. Everything about you always made me feel like we were destined to be brought together, we fit so well with each other and our bodies seemed to always be pulling towards each other like magnets.

My fingernails dug into the bed sheets as I closed my eyes to "watch" you. Who cares if I couldn't see you right now, right? I could always close my eyes and watch the way your perfect body; your perfect everything, moved like the water as you glided through the air, running towards me whenever we would see each other again.

That wouldn't be for months, though..

The coldness of my pillow was fading as my body denied itself rest. I couldn't fall asleep with the sound of your angelic voice, whispering in my head. Which was ironic, because that voice was the same one that always helped me fall asleep on my hardest nights. Nothing right now could ever comfort me.. not unless you showed up.

I groaned in annoyance as a soft knock cracked against my door. Who needs to talk to me right now, it's 11 o' clock at night.

I pulled myself up off of my bed; the bedsheets lightly sticking to my skin from the sweat that once dripped from my body. Walking felt like trying to pull myself through quicksand, all I wanted to do was to see you. You see you—no, feel you jump into my arms and press your beautiful lips up against mine.

God, how amazing that would feel right now.

My body finally brought itself to the door and my hand slowly pulled it open to see a face I had known for quite some time.

"Tom?" I mumbled out, pressed my face into the tinted wall, "What are you doing up here?" I asked, my breath feeling heavy again.

"We're going to a party, are you coming or are you going to coop yourself up in your room again, for the nth time in a row." He spouted at me.

I rolled my eyes before telling him I'd be staying in my room again. He may have seemed a little agitated about that, but from the way he was looking at me, I think he could tell what was wrong. He always knew what was wrong.

"It's always obvious, your eyes tell us everything, Bill.." He would say to me every once in a while when I felt down. I guess I was never the one who was good at hiding my feelings, especially from my brother.

ich kann mich nich' mehr mit ansehen—bin ich los

alles was hier mal war—kann ich nich' mehr in mir finden

I forced myself into the bathroom, my hands gripping onto the sink in front of me as my eyes hesitated to look myself in the face. I'm sure I looked awful. Ever since I met you, I never felt like myself without you. You brought the me out of me. That's what I loved about you so much.

My eye makeup was smeared a bit and some of my mascara had run down my cheeks. I honestly looked like a mess. I blinked in the mirror, watching myself crumble. I needed you so badly. This was one of the hard nights, the hard nights when I really needed you.

The water i splashed upon my face dripped down my neck as my eyes slowly came upwards to look myself in the face.

I could never seem to see myself when you weren't with me, you always made me feel so much better. About everything and anything. I'm still not sure how you did it..

alles weg—wie im wahn, seh ich mich immer mehr verschwinden

My freshly dried face from a cotton towel felt stiff as tears rolled down my cheeks. My eyes stung with a fiery intensity that only someone as gracious and wonderful as you.

My body didn't seem like my own anymore as I crashed down against the soft, recently sweaty bed. Makeup smeared on the pillow as my cheek rested against it, staring over at the dimly lit; slightly sparky (?) lamp next to me. The curtains surrounding my room seemed to understand my awful being right now as I could feel more tears threatening to spill over my waterline, down my face.

I could almost swear this was an out of body experience, maybe I was just tired. Everything around me felt like a dream and I could feel myself slipping away. My body, my dreams, my everything. Nothing felt real anymore. Not when I'm away from you.

ich bin nich' ich wenn du nich' bei mir bist—bin ich allein

und das was jetzt noch von mir übrig ist...

My breath was caught in my throat as more memories of you poured into my head.

××× I remember the first time I saw you—

Walking outside the studio while everybody else finished up inside, the cold wind blowing in my face, brushing my hardened bangs to the side. My teeth lightly chattered as you flowed by me. I could swear you were an angel.

From your angelic face, to your scent. You were absolutely perfect and I was infatuated with you. I remember thinking someone like you would never go for someone like me.. right?

How happy I was when I figured out I was wrong.

From the way you held yourself to your laughter to your strength. You were everything I was looking for and more. How could I stumble upon love so quickly? How was I so lucky to have you enthralled with me.

You had never even heard of my band yet, you weren't a crazy, obsessed fan girl. You weren't someone looking for a one night stand or someone who wanted fame by association. You were so beautiful and real and absolutely raw. I still don't understand sometimes why you chose me, but I'm so glad you did.

×××

but here... without you. I feel as though I've lost a part of me. Like I'm not me when I'm not with you. I don't feel whole and I don't think I will until we've been reunited.

××× you're bright red, slushy red tongue seemed to gawk at my blue one as we laughed. I laid my around around you as we walked through the park. I finally had a day off from rehearsing and playing live shows, to hang out with you.

I swear my heart was going to explode out of my chest just from staring down into your beautiful eyes. The way you were staring up at me—i don't think I had ever loved somebody so much. You were my true "everything".

××× your warm breath, slowly yet calmly blowing against my neck as you fell into a deep slumber was probably one of the most relaxing things I could ever dream of. My arms were wrapped around you as the TV quietly played in the background. My body had never felt so amazing. And now with you—you just made everything so much better.

My hands glided into your hair as you snuggled closer into me. With the warm air surrounding us and the soft hum of the noise around us. Everything seemed absolutely perfect.

How could I live without you?

will ich nich' sein

draußen hängt der himmel schief

und an der Wand dein abschiedsbrief

ich bin nich' ich wenn du nich' bei mir bist—bin ich allein

I slowly closed my eyes, my body finally relaxing. Ever-so slightly, at least. We'd be together again soon, I'm not sure why tonight was so hard for me, to be without you.. but I cannot wait to see your sparkling beauty staring back at me when we come together again. I don't feel like myself right now, but hopefully with time, you will bring that back to me...

sorry this isn't longer 😭 I hope you guys enjoyed this though! also here are the English translations for the lyrics. They're pretty accurate, but some stuff may be a little off 😞

translations:

one: My eyes show off all of my sadness, and find no comfort here.

two: I can't face myself anymore, I'm not me.

three: Everything that was here, I cannot find myself inside me.

four: Swept away like a dream, I see myself vanish more and more.

five: I'm not myself when you're not, not with me, i'm all alone.

six: And everything that is still left of me.

seven: I don't want to be outside the heavens hang a slope and on the wall your farewell note. I'm not myself when you're not, not with me, I'm alone.

also this isn't proofread, so if there are any mistakes sorry!!

taglist: none yet

[scrubbinn]

_____ HRT: 15 months: “Human”

“Hey Mayday. How's my girlfriend doing today?... I hope you can hear me in there. I'm recording another tape for you in case you forget everything again. I just got back from the doctor, they ran some tests, still couldn't figure out what's up with my knee. I think maybe I'm just cursed, with this broken human body. I guess you don't have to deal with that now huh? Lucky.”

“It just sucks, you know? Not a single medical doctor in Canada can tell me what's wrong and then when suddenly, magic exists, it gets regulated so you can't use it for medicine! Ugh. Rules are dumb, why do we even have them. Also sucks that I have to walk here every time I miss you. Which is a lot. Why does everything have to be so shit?”

“Speaking of shit, you should have heard me go off on that doc when you first started… cocooning? I’m blanking on the word. But I just went off on that man, It felt so good just to throw everything back in that pompous jerk's face! He had it coming, you have no idea how long I've been waiting to go off on a medical professional. He does have his uses, I suppose. You weirdly seem to like him, and at least he can put in enough effort to care about your physical health. But you should have seen how he reacted to you, he makes me so, so, so, AAAAARG! Sorry, you don't like yelling right?”

“You know, when I heard about you passing out nearly half a year ago, I thought, this is it, I'm going to lose her forever. I guess I did, when she decided to forget me. That's not fair, I just, I can't help still being mad about it. After everything we went through, and everything you went through with our friends and family. This really meant more than all of those memories put together? God you're such a dummy. I wish I could understand you.”

“Getting to meet you all over again, I didn't hate it like I thought I would. No matter the memories, it really was still you. Just, a little different. Sorry I kept pushing you to remember something… Maybe it was wrong of me. But every time I saw your face, your eyes looked back like they were trying to remember anything. It made me kind of happy, like I was important enough that some small part of you didn’t want to let go of me. I thought we were making progress. But if we have to do it again when you come out. I might actually start to hate it.”

“...Hey, you are happy right? This is what you wanted, yeah? You know I'm ok with you not being human. When you told me you were thinking about this, I supported it. Though, I'm still having trouble getting used to it. I don't really know how to feel now that you're like this. I just, I want what makes you happy, and I know you want the same for me. It's just been difficult right now. To keep smiling. I… I went to that sushi place we were going to go to. They had really good unagi. I ate so much I could barely afford the bill, haha. I know if I go there again without you, it's just going to taste like nothing. If you're not there with me, what's the point? This moment. The world has color again, I can taste things again when I'm in this room, and it hurts so much because you're not here. I'm sorry I… I'm trying not to cry in front of you hun. I'm sorry.”

* * *

“You don't mind if I stay here tonight do you hun? I don't really feel like walking back home right now. When I’m with you I- um, hello?”

“Oh didn’t realize anyone else was here? You’re Abigail right?”

“And your May’s mom right?” Are you here to see her?”

“Yes, I haven’t actually checked in since I heard the news. Is that. Her?”

“Pretty sure yeah. Unless there’s another girlfriend shaped cocoon that I missed. D- Do you need a tissue?”

“No, I’ll be fine, thank you… Pardon, but would you be able to answer a question? I don’t really understand this whole therian thing. I’m still a little shocked when Mich- Mayday said she was doing this sort of thing in the first place. I’m fine with it, I support her. But, did she need to do this?”

“Huh, what do you mean?”

“Well I mean, did she need to change? Isn’t it just safer to hide? She’s doing such a brave thing but there are so many people that might hurt her. It's my job to worry about her, and I know this city is better and all with this sort of thing, but what if she gets attacked when she visits, what am I supposed to tell my sister if she asks what Mayday is up to. My family doesn't even know her name is Mayday now.”

“...Oh. Oh, this is weird seeing it from an outsider perspective.”

“I'm sorry? What do you mean?”

“It's that you don't get it, I mean I forgot it until now, but you don't understand. It would have been more dangerous if she didn't do this. She's in pain, her gender, Her body, her species. They don't match her brain. It's not like it's a choice either. She's hurting. Her staying human, she might have made worse choices. Ugh, I'm sorry hun. I should have realized how much this means to you, I'll be here, for real this time. I'll be here for y…

Oh my god, it's tearing. G-g-go! Get a doctor!”

“What? Oh! Uh, right!”

“Hun! Can you hear me? It's me! Follow my voice!”

“A…b…i…

Mimic HRT: 15 months: “no longer”

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[chaotic-nick]

[a/n] here's something straight from my head when I couldn't get rid of the Miche itch, grammar errors, cussing, dialogue and what not

Miche Zacharias x reader | old flames, modern au

Standing in his kitchen, it's a quiet night except for his low hums against her shoulder. Miche insisted that (Y/n) stand in front of him as he cooke��� worked?

Cooked and worked at the same time.

His ipad open to his emails coming in continuous rings one minute. Then a single ring. Then again.

"You ..." she breathed, "didn't need to cook for me."

Miche only hummed again. This time much longer. Even pressing himself against her as he set his knife down. "Why?"

"What why, Miche?"

"Why don't you want me to cook for you?"

"Because you have work tomorrow," then pointed to the ipad, "and you still have it now."

Quietly, he went back to chopping. How he kept his left hand on (Y/n) she didn't know. The skills you gain as a world class chef, as one may guess. "It's the only time I can cook for you. You still eat the spicy stuff?"

"so insistent in cooking for me." She turned around, hugging him.

"couldn't cook for you when we fucked in college." He dared joke.

Though (Y/n)'s hands, rested on his waist, grew cold. Remembering how in love—

"You know," momentarily, he stopped. Finding her hands to hold. "I wasn't ready to commit back then."

"Like you'll ever be ready to commit."

"I couldn't give you the life you deserved–"

"Bullshit!" She spat. "It was my parents spoiling me– heck! I can't even afford the shit they got me now that im working."

"What I'm saying is," Miche cleared his throat, "is- is I'm someone you can be proud of having now"

"I would've been proud of you even then," confused, (Y/n)'s eyes welled with tears. "The fuck is with you and committing, Miche?"

"Look," holding her hands in his, and begging for her to look at him, Miche crouched to her level, nearly knealing. "Please, look at me, (Y/n)."

"No. Fuck off." Childish banter to steer him away. "It took me years to completely remove you from my head, thinking about you in everything i did when you- YOU probably fucked around more in Europe."

In a quiet tone, and as the realisation set in, Miche spoke "You still ... love me don't you."

Nodding as her lips pressed into a thin line, "Thought I didn't, and then we fucked around again. And there you go."

Silence hung in the air. Miche's forehead against hers, green eyes cast down their feet standing in front of each other. When will they be like this again. "We're not in our twenties anymore."

"You're not ready to commit."

"I am now." Peppering the side of her face with soft kisses, he confessed, "only if it's you. I swear."

"You're so confusing," she sobbed. "So, so, so confusing, Miche."

"Just— one chance, or if not that just stay longer let me cook for you. Please, [Y/n]."

Swallowing any sob that wanted to escape and a hand wiping her eyes, she only pulled away. "I have to go, Miche. I'm sorry."

[1-800-iluvhockey]

slipping through my fingers - hughes siblings

warnings - mild language, mini angst & sadness (not everything will be accurate as it’s fiction lol), it is a very long fic and has two instagram edits as well

please listen with slipping through my fingers by abba <33

hey it’s me again. I sent you guys four tickets to graduation & I hope you guys can make it! mom & dad already told me they could make it, and q said that he is flying in for it. I hope you three can make it! it would mean the world to me— please…. I’ll talk to you soon j! love ya— bye.

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

college graduation.

the one thing that y/n had been dreading since she started at umich…. leaving. home was here. so many good memories here, as well as meeting her bestest friends & boyfriend. but it was time to go— and it just felt like

time slipped away from her.

she was glad that she was convinced by q to come here, and then got to share some of her college years with her twin brother luke. y/n always felt like she was forgotten by her siblings as she didn’t excel at hockey and that she was a girl. they loved her, and she loved them— but the distance between them was enough for her to feel like she didn’t get enough time to grow up with them. she wanted to not stand in their way, but still cheer them on. so, when quinn— her oldest brother convinced her to go to umich instead of boston college, she felt seen. she felt even more seen when luke — her own twin was petitioning for her to go to college with him.

“cmon sis— we can take on the world from ann arbor together! come with me!!” luke pleaded at the family dinner table as ellen gave her daughter a “it’s up to you, scholarships have been coming in for you for years to go to anywhere you want sweetie. lu is going for athletics— and you are our ms. academics! that would be amazing but you know that it is your choice, honey.”

“okay lu on just one condition……. don’t push me away.” she told her older brother she got tackled into a bear hug from the side.

“YES!! 3 to mich baby!!!” q yelled as her two older brothers got up and joined the hug.

“guess I’m the odd one out now…” jack joked as he saw y/n’s smile grow bigger by the minute.

“I love you hockey idiots.” she said as she meted into her older brother’s hug.

y/n got to be his cheerleader sister for the two years as became one of the greatest young players in college hockey. her friend group intermingled with his— and she even had a thing with his friend mark estapa for awhile. until they all left after their sophomore year, as expected. they had big nhl contracts & big bucks coming in. no one was more proud than y/n of her boys, she bought all of their jerseys, went to as many games as she could all while being in school.

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

junior year started and she had earned an internship for the red wings. a dream come true as she has always wanted to be in the hockey industry some how. it felt as it was a birthright that she started to fulfill. y/n was on cloud 9 when she called her dad and said that she had started with the red wings as an intern assistant pt to the head physical therapist to the red wings organization. her parents were ecstatic as they knew how important it was to her.

on one of the first games, she met him— simon. he had came into the locker room with a bad shoulder injury during a game while y/n was “on deck” aka waiting for someone to give her someone to work on. he came in with a bloody nose and a out of place shoulder— and changed her whole life.

“hey— you think that you can fix this and we can go out some time?” he asked her as she looked to the side to see him smirking at her with a little bit of blood on his nose still. she had only met him 20 minutes ago and he was asking HER out.

“maybe— we still need to get this blood off. my brother may add some if he knew though.” she joked as they both laughed. she was nervous. guys aren’t normally like this to her without knowing her family.

“I think you will be worth the risk, ms dr in training hughes.” he winked and put the ice pack back on his nose.

“hughes? you know who I am?” she questioned stupidly as he smiled at her. he looks down to her name tag that says “y/n hughes— physical therapy & sports medicine assistant” with the red wings logo on it & her little flower doodles. her eyes look down to her name tag— and she feels herself turning pink.

“right— my name tag. duh.” she says laughing off her awkward question as she turns to grab some k-t tape for his shoulder.

her back was turned as he started “of course— but that’s not how I know you. I saw you on draft night on tv. luke was no.4 overall and I was no.6. I followed you on instagram after that. I thought you were cute, despite all of the hockey glory family & scary older brothers to go through. you seemed so sweet & cared a lot about hockey. I just didn’t know I’d actually get to meet you…..” simon semi ranted as y/n turned bright pink at his words.

she turned around and he saw her turn pink, and he smiled at it. she was cute, in a way that was different from the rest. the compassion & intelligence radiated from her making her stand out in a way that caught his eye.

“okay— one date edvinsson. but first let’s get your shoulder back in place & get you healed up.” y/n said in return of his semi rant as she quickly popped his shoulder back in. she kept him company for the rest of the game, getting him more ice water as they talked & watched the game. it was relaxing, the pair got to have a calm moment in their “stressful” lives.

he didn’t care who she was the sister of— or what family she was from. he was a genuine, caring guy who wanted to be with her. she loved him— she loved everything about her life when he stepped— ran into it with his injury stunt that night. date after date, their relationship went from flirtatious friends to a private but secret relationship. no one knew who got them whipped— but each other.

���☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

the rest of junior year flew by, as well as her internship with the red wings. at the end of the season, after a great time she was promoted from an intern to a part time assistant for the red wings in her department. summer came & she spent most of it at the lake w/ simon. her parents loved him, and her brothers had no idea of her relationship yet due to the fact they have had summer hockey and couldn’t come home. again, she felt that time slipped away as her brothers wouldn’t even call any more, or text her to check up on her like she did to them.

one night at the lake, the university called & told her that after she graduated that she would have a guaranteed spot for their graduate program, which would have hours for her to go work for the red wings. simon was sitting next to her, trying to watch his girlfriend’s odd expressions on the phone.

“yes— thank you! thank you so much. I cannot wait to sign. alright — see you in a few weeks then!” y/n then quickly hung up, looking over at her confused boyfriend. they were sitting on the dock as she got the call.

“who was that? signing? I’m confused.” he asked her as she leaned over to kiss him happily.

“guess who’s becoming a wolverine again! and a redwing!” she said ecstatically as simon jumped up.

“WHAT?!” he said excited as she jumped up and hugged him tightly.

“yeah!!! I got the graduate program spot & it will let me go part time with the red wings now— this is it!” y/n told him as he spun her around.

“my girlfriend with her big girl job & big girl graduate school!! I’m so proud of you baby. you deserve the world!!” he told her as she started to tear up.

“I— I love you so much si— thank you for being here.” she told him as they held hands walking back up to the house so she can tell her parents.

“always my love. always. are you going to tell your brothers? or just your parents?” he questioned as they walked up the dock.

“just my parents. I’ll wait until I get closer to graduation to tell the boys about my new job & graduate school. I still got a season left as a intern so—“ y/n trailed off as simon stopped her.

“hey— you got time. they are going to be happy for you regardless.” simon told his nervous girlfriend as they walked in the door. “go— celebrate. I’ll be here.” pushing her to go to the dinner table & tell her parents. he watched from behind the corner as she told her parents, taking a few pictures as the moment went on.

it’s like he was freezing the special moment for her in time

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

november came and it was only a month away from graduation. y/n's university life was full of having its "lasts" while simon was cruising through the beginning of the season. he would try to come to her senior banquets if he was off, but y/n knew that the thought counts if he couldn't attend. simon was nervous about it because she knew how her brothers were with her, the stories he has listened to about the hughes brothers ignoring their baby sister. he wanted her to feel loved and he engaged in everything he could for her. 

two weeks from graduation; y/n relooked up the graduation date in correlation to her brother's hockey schedules and of course, they didn't line up anymore. she knew that they weren't going to put the effort in to show up, but she still sent a voicemail. 

and of course, she waited every day for a call or text back from at least one of them. she would call her mom every day, asking how her and her dad were doing, as well as asking about the boys. nothing on the boys, but at least her parents agreed to come to her college graduation. 

she felt like shit the week before graduation, sick with stress. simon was truly worried about his girlfriend, and he couldn't even worry about his stress. 

graduation day came and y/n's stress turned into bliss when she was handed her diploma. she couldn't see her group in the crowd, but she could feel the love. simon was sitting with her parents and grandparents in the crowd.

simon sat next to ellen as ellen called frantically all day to get in contact with her sons. again, no answer. "I swear I talk to y/n more than those boys." she told simon and simon tried to laugh it off.

"yeah, y/n knows more about the boys through their insatgram posts than anything else." he tells his future in law as she looks at him, dumbfounded.

"si-- what?" she questions almost angrily. "did y/n never tell you?" he asks as the whole hughes family starts to listen in. "she hasn't actually talked to any of the boys since junior year. they ignore all of her texts and calls, she didn't see them when they would come to detroit......" he continues on and ellen puts the pieces together in her brain. her boys have completely ignored their baby sister, so y/n would always check up on them through her. 

———-

instagram

liked by @/colecaufield, _alexturcotte, elblue06 & 87,672 others

y/n.hughes - thanks umich for the best 4, see you soon for grad school! also go redwings as I will be part time with them over my graduate program! ♥️ thankful for my people and life always🥰 #goblue

tagged @/ universityofmichigan, umichhockey, detroitredwings, simonedvinssonn

posted on december 17

limited comments

umichhockey - congrats from all of us here at yost!! 〽️

↳ y/n.hughes - thank you 💙💛

detroitredwings - ❤️🤍

↳ y/n.hughes - excited for this new step with you!!

elblue06 - congrats my girl!! 🥰🥰

↳ y/n.hughes - I love you mama💖 @/elblue06

simonedvinssonn - pretty grad😇

↳ y/n.hughes - min kärlek♥️♥️ (my love) @/simonedvinssonn

trevorzegras - congrats baby hughes! 🤩

nicohischier - congrats hughesy!!! 🥹🥹

load more comments below

———-

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

three ish months later.......

hey, it’s y/n. I’m calling and I know you wouldn’t have answered me— but I’m engaged! I just called to tell you and jack because I already sent a voicemail to q. I love you both & I hope that you can call me or facetime me soon. but if not— I’ll see you when I see you. or if I even see you. bye, lu lu. 

another phone call was unanswered and sent to voicemail by her siblings. all she wanted was for them to answer or even just acknowledge their existence. she didn't know why she had been exiled, nothing on simon's & hers relationship was out, she was still at umich -- nothing was adding up. but all three of her older brothers were ghosting her. she felt like they were slipping away from her, but this time -- they truly were.

being engaged and working for the same team as your fiancee was tough for y/n. papers were to be signed, and contracts were to be renegotiated, but everything worked out in simon's and y/n's favor. the rest of the year went smoothly, and playoffs came quick enough. the devils were in and the canucks as well as the redwings were out of the playoffs. meaning the whole hughes family went to new jersey to see jack and luke play. y/n told simon that he could come, and ellen encouraged it. so, the future edvinssons with the hughes parents went to new jersey for the first round.

———-

the airport was awkward as they met quinn there, and then waited for jack and luke to pick all of them up. quinn had grown up significantly since the last time that y/n had seen him in person. his beard was grown out, and he grew into the levelheaded defensive player that the canucks needed and wanted as a captain. his face tensed when he saw his little sister with his family, and a tall blonde man. he had no idea why his mother had that face on. 

"hey, how was the flight?" quinn asked his family as he dropped his stuff next to ellen's, engulfing her into a hug. a hug which she reciprocated but then as she let go, she grabbed her eldest son by ear, tugging him to his little sister. y/n and simon stifled a laugh as ellen dragged him to them.

"quintin jerome hughes! I am livid at you and your brothers! ignoring your sister for THAT LONG?!? unacceptable, you are not children anymore." she said as she dropped him off right in front of the couple.

quinn was facing downwards, meaning his eye level was at his little sister's hands, meaning he saw that ROCK on her finger. his head whipped up so fast it almost gave him whiplash. eye to eye, quinn got a good look at his baby sister who was not a baby anymore. she was beautiful, and he had no idea how much time passed until he saw that rock on her finger. "you're engaged?" he questioned her lightly, almost out of breath because he couldn't BELIEVE that his BABY sister was engaged, let alone in a relationship.

"yeah, if you would pick up your damn phone you would have gotten MULTIPLE things from me over the past two years, quintin." she spat back. he was shocked at her anger, but not fully surprised by it. he looked over to her left to see him. the man who stole his little sister's heart, simon edvinsson. he knew who he was as they were both defensemen, as well as luke. they were always in the articles together. 

"you're marrying a hockey player, y/n? that's pretty low of you." quinn told her as he watched her face drop.

"unlike you quinn, he actually has time and cares for me. he has ALWAYS been there, unlike some hockey players I know." she tells her older brother, and she laughs at the end. "oh speak of the devil and they shall appear. simon, meet my other two asshole brothers, luke and jack." she pats his shoulder as quinn turns around to see his other brothers.

"hey what's up -- who's the guy y/n?" jack questions as ellen starts to walk over to her other two sons.

"you two are in serious trouble. how could you ghost y/n like this? for this long? unacceptable." ellen says grabbing them both by their ears for a moment and then letting them go.

"boys, meet simon, y/n's fiancé. y/n, go order an uber for you and simon, please." jim asks them and they nod.

"c'mon babe." she says lightly, grabbing their stuff and heading to the uber terminal.

"they aren’t mad, are they?" simon asks, holding her hand. "not at you my love, but a hughes family talk will be done and hopefully my dumbass brothers will realize what they have done wrong." she tells her fiancé.

———-

a day later and its game day. y/n and simon waited until the game to see everyone (so aka the boys could get their shit together). ellen texted y/n that the boys would need to explain it to her. so, like any good sibling, she met them before the game. bright and early at 8am so they could have a good talk. she met them by a coffee shop near the rink, just a simple brunch spot where it should be fine to talk. or so she thought.

all three boys were sitting at a table when she walked in. she was wearing a monochrome black and red outfit, her brunette hair in curls. she had developed a nice look since they last saw her in person. she was glowing, and looked so much like their mom. she smiled softly at them as she sat down.

“did you order yet?” she asked them politely as they all had coffees in front of them.

“no but we did get coffee, I got you a vanilla latte.” luke told his twin sister as he scooted it next to her.

“thanks luke.” she thanked him.

the waitress came over and took their orders, and then it was silent again. jack cleared his throat and quinn took a drink of his coffee. y/n kept looking down at her rings, fiddling with them. it was awkward, all of the hughes siblings were in a way — but especially now.

“you want to start?” quinn asked his younger sister as she looked up.

“yeah. what the fuck.” she stated bluntly as she took a sip of her iced latte. “how, why, when. I want to know everything. I have done everything right. I have no idea what I have done wrong. do you even know how you made me feel? all of you? I have always felt like the outcasted sibling and you all have made it worse over this period of let’s ignore y/n time.” she ranted as she watched all of their faces turn.

“look y/n with everything going on—“ quinn started as y/n bluntly cut him off. “quintin do not fuck with me. I work for an organization in the league and I’m engaged to a player. I know how your schedules work, I keep up with both of your teams on top of the redwings’, and simon still makes time for me. so, do not bullshit me if you guys say “I’ve had no time” or “we didn’t want to bother you.” she told them straight as their food came.

the tension was thick between the four of them. y/n couldn’t even eat, she just stared and drank her coffee.

“we thought you needed space okay? we thought you wanted to be your own person and we are sorry. we made a promise to each other to all back off and not be the overbearing brothers that we were for the past 20 years. I regret it I do because look at you now. graduated, big girl job, engaged?! I regret missing these milestones of your life y/n.” jack says sincerely which made her choke up.

“I’m sorry too y/n, as a twin I have been horrible. I broke our promise of not pushing you away. I wanted to let you have your umich experience on your own for the past two years but I would do anything to go back and tell myself how stupid our idea was to give you space. I love you, I love you sis. I am happy that you got to do what you have always wanted career wise — and honestly, even relationship wise. I haven’t fully met him, but my friends in the league say he is a pretty good guy.” luke rants heartfully as he grabs y/n’s hand.

at this point y/n is looking at a with tears in her eyes. she has always been closest to quinn. seeing his baby sister look at him like she used to when they were toddlers makes his heart ache. how could he be so stupid, how could all of them be so stupid.

“you— you slipped though our fingers, y/n. and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for graduation, I’m sorry I wasn’t there to buy your first legal drink like I said, I’m sorry for not answering your calls, I’m sorry that I didn’t try harder. you’ve grown up without us for the past two years and I fucking regret it all. I missed hearing your voice and seeing you at games or in our gear. I’m guilty for pushing you away but I’m not guilty about it if that means you got to get your dream job and dream job because we weren’t standing in your light anymore. I love you. we have missed having our little dancing queen in our life, sis. will you take us back?” quinn stutters out and y/n is full on crying in her pancakes.

“I love you boys. I hated that you left — simon hated that you left. but if that means I would get you back again then I would let you do it to me all over again. you are my brothers and I would nev—never not want you in my life. I am still mad but I have worked past it. I love you three to death. luke, jack — lets get you playoff ready, yeah? ice cream?” y/n tells them as they both smile.

quinn is looking at the two boys and their eyes are lit up like christmas. the boys get up and hug their sister tightly and quinn goes to pay the bill. luke and jack lead the way to the ice cream shop down the way, and quinn & y/n follow.

“so, you really love him yeah?” he lightly hits y/n’s shoulder as she blushes.

“yeah I do quinny, he means everything to me.” she mumbles softly as quinn wraps his arm around her shoulder.

“as long as he makes you happy, we approve — but sis; you do know he will still have to pass the hughes brother tests right?” quinn jokes to her as they both laugh.

“simon is up for it if you guys are, but my man is a 6’6 goon so be careful.” she jokes as they meet them at the ice cream shop.

“morning ice cream before playoffs, just like old times when you’d drag us in michigan.” jack tells his younger sister as they make their way to the counter.

“good habits die hard, jacky. time may have slipped but I’m still the same.” she tells him as she orders a mint chocolate chip cone with extra rainbow sprinkles, just like she did as a kid.

———-

instagram

liked by @/ umichhockey, edwards.73, trevorzegras & 127,728 others

y/n.hughes - can finally post these♥️ my secret is out! #engaged💍

tagged - @/ simonedvinssonn

location - hughes lake house

posted april 17

load comments down below

elblue06 - finally got those back!!

↳ y/n.hughes - the perfect planner :) @/elblue06

lhughes_06 - congrats sis🤑

↳ y/n.hughes - love you moose 💖 @/lhughes_06

simonedvinssonn - jag kan inte vänta med att få spendera för alltid med dig min älskade♥️ (I can’t wait to spend forever with you my love)

↳ y/n.hughes - forever by the beach boys baby🤍 @/simonedvinssonn

jackhughes - still need the summer tests but he is approved 🫡

↳ _quinnhughes - our baby sister isn’t a baby anymore 😭 @/jackhughes

trevorzegras - WEDDING BELLSSSS ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

colecaufield - CONGRATS SIS

umichhockey - team 101 reunion???

load more comments down below

———-

since the hughes sibling talk, the hughes family & simon watched every single devils playoff game together, as a family. the devils went all the way to the stanley cup finals, everyone was ecstatic for it as luke & jack were not having record breaking seasons. y/n was happy to be there in person to see her brothers shine. she missed it. but she was even happier to see her brothers get along with her fiancé, especially quinn. simon and quinn bonded fast as they watched all of the games, side by side.

two years ago, if she told herself that her brothers would be back in her life and being on good terms with her fiancé, enough to even be civil while watching the cup together - she would have laughed. now…. she can’t imagine it any different. time slipped by and the hughes siblings grew apart, but not even time can break the bond of the siblings. it just grew stronger.

if y/n knew that this would be the outcome of growing apart from her siblings — she’d let it all happen again; in a heartbeat.

[lightofraye]

https://www.tumblr.com/rrahuntersblog/756303389366878208/you-lot-need-to-learn-to-stop-projecting-your

I’m so sorry, but this got long. I hope you don’t mind posting my countering this anon's BS claims. I know you didn’t have the patience to do it yourself, but I can’t just let those ridiculous assumptions pass. If you’re willing, please find my rebuttals below.

"Deluding yourself to actually believe he hates Misha when he doesn’t.

- Who said Jensen hates Misha? Most Misha critical people certainly said Jensen looks like he doesn’t enjoy Misha's Elmira (?) (From Loony Toons) like hugs. And we have said they are not besties, but former colegues/work friends, at best.

"It’s not Jensens fault that he has to try to be the peace keeper between the fandom, Blame the fandom not Misha or Jensen.

- When has Jensen ever lifted a finger to play peacekeeper? He’s too afraid of upsetting his physcho stans to grow a pair and confront haters. Jared is the one who tries to keep the peace, even though he is the one who gets the most irrational hate thrown at him.

- Also, Misha is VERY MICH to blame for the fracture in fandom, and fur deliberately feeding heller delusions.

"And Jensen didn’t Pander last night, that’s just your projection,"

- Sorry, Anon. You don’t know what Jensen thinks anymore than we do. So the fact that you THINK he ISN'T pandering is simply YOUR projection. I think he was, which means he was laying his Misha praise on thick.

"And to say that Jensen is not close to Misha when crew members and other cast members has stated for years that Jensen and misha are particularly close to each other"

- Can you produce proof of that beyond the cast and crew saying they ALL get along, where they actually single out Jensen and Misha as "particularly close"? I’m guessing no.

- What is VERY well documented is recurring cast, guest stars, and Misha himself describing how J2 were so close that they basically existed in their own bubble, one that Misha was left out of often

"and Jensen said that he honestly loves Misha as a friend multiple times."

- 🙄 ALL of the cast, or many, have said they ALL love each other. Apparently, Jared and Misha say, or said in the past, "Love you, brother," too. This is NOT special to Jensen and Misha.

- Also, it is questionable how sincere it was, seeing as Misha has repeatedly thrown Jensen under the destiel bus. … when Jensen was very clearly annoyed by the invadice fandom response to the ship. That isn’t what you do if you love your friend.

- Jensen also takes shots and small digs at Misha just as often, if not much more so, than he gives him praise. So, doesn't that mean he hates Misha? Probably not. Doesn’t it make them besties? Probavky not. Also, do you truly think the entire SPN cast, even the ones on the con circuit, truly all "love" each other? Seems unlikely to me. Getting along is not love. And there is also a hierarchy among the cat, and J2 are together at the top. I think a Jensen likes a Rob a whole lot more than Misha, before you think I’m trying to blindly argue in Hared's favor.

“It’s clearly your feelings of hatred for misha that you project this obvious lie about Jensen and Misha not being close."

- It’s clearly your gullibility and slavish love for Misha and a stupid ship that makes you blind to the fact that actors can say something on stage, for the benefit of the audience, without it actually being a true reflection of their personal lives.

- Also, Jensen and Misha themselves noted that they hadn’t spoken, spoken NOT seen, each other for several moths between the last con of 2023 and the first con of 2024. That sounds super "close," to me.

"Grow up and open your eyes"

- Perhaps you should take your own advice, dear. Stop believing anything Misha Pandering Queerbaiter Colins says, and you’ll be closer to seeing the more likely reality of the situation. Jensen, in fact, probably dies not hate Misha, but I sincerely doubt he thinks about him much when he isn’t standing in front of him at a con, either.

- People who have loved J2’s closeness over the years had evidence like them living together and vacationing together to support their friendship. Cockles fans have one PR boat trip and Misha milking the fact that Jensen let him stay at his apartment when filming on occasion (something that I think Jared did, too. But I wonder why Misha only shared about one … pandering, perhaps?). Misha filmed for like 3 days a week when he worked, so that doesn’t have to make them overly close, either.

Anyway Anon, stop just believing lip service because you want it to be true, and pay attention to actions, and things like body language and tone of voice. Those things can tel, you more at times than words.

Hi there!

Thanks for the rebuttal.

Here it is.

I appreciate it.

[dont-f-with-moogles]

Terra my love 💚

So many questions about your WIP post it note 😜

(remember the post was actually a WIP ask game, right?)

1. Is the whole story planned with chapter structure etc... or even partly written already?

2. If you already know, how many chapters will there be for this fic?

3. Will they kiss? & more importantly will they fuck? /jk

4. What other SNK characters will appear throughout the fic?

5. May I ask for a sneak peek? (because there was no "WIP it Wednesday" post yesterday 😢)

Could be from the next chapter or another random chapter, I'm so in love with this fic & in love with your writing style & greedy that I'll take any crumbs 🤲 🧎🏻‍♀️

Love you lots & even more 💚

Val! Thanks for sending these questions. I'm always so excited to talk about what I'm working on! I think A Sunrise Without You Is Coming will probably be my longest (and last) fic.

1. Is the whole story planned with chapter structure etc... or even partly written already? The whole fic is planned from start to finish :)

2. If you already know, how many chapters will there be for this fic? I planned 25 chapter outlines originally but ch3 ended up being longer than I thought once I had written it. I had to snip it off part way through. This might happen again so let's guess somewhere between 26 and 30 chapters in total.

3. Will they kiss? & more importantly will they fuck? /jk Honestly, I haven't included anything more than pining and eye fucking in my ch outlines! To give the story an authentic feel, I'm going to feel my way through their relationship as it grows. If the moment seems right, I'll take things to the next level ;)

4. What other SNK characters will appear throughout the fic? Apart from OG Levi Squad, Moblit, Nifa and Nile... you can expect to see Miche, Marlo and Floch very shortly. In future chapters we will also be joined by Hitch, Reiner, Erwin, Zeke, and Kenny.

5. May I ask for a sneak peek? (because there was no "WIP it Wednesday" post yesterday 😢) I have skimped out on the WIP It Wednesdays, huh? Fair's fair. Let's have a sneak peek then:

From ch4: I'll Not Speak A Word Despite a lingering chill and the last vestiges of afternoon light, the folk of Shiganshina were still leisurely browsing the marketplace. At the centre of the military village, where the earth roads converged, stood three avenues of unembellished stalls, each exhibiting their wares. 

Levi walked amongst civilians, hesitating as he drew level with a metal rack of women’s clothing. Inconspicuously, he cast his eyes around, before approaching. 

Thick woollen cardigans hung amongst long floral-patterned skirts. Levi peeled back a knitted sleeve. Then, with growing impatience, he swept past one garment after another.

“Hello? Are you looking for anything in particular?” asked the proprietor, a woman with dark hair pulled back into a low ponytail. At her intrusion, Levi quickly withdrew his hand.

With a final sweep of the area around them, Levi inclined his head as though he were about to mutter his response. He opened his mouth. He closed it again.

“This is part of our Fall Range…” The woman lifted a yellow button-down shirt, smoothing the material. “You know this is what they’re all wearing on the continent.”

She crooked a finger, beckoning him closer. With an expression of resignation, Levi obliged her.

“...I saw pictures in a Marleyan magazine once,” the proprietor boasted. 

Levi nodded, uncomprehending, as the woman seized a peasant skirt to tempt him with next. The pocket of his khaki military coat vibrated. Thankful for the interruption, Levi removed his cell phone. 

“I’ll take them all,” Levi indicated the entire rack with his hand. Flipping his phone open, he held the device up to his ear. 

“What size is she, sir?”

Levi hesitated again, his palm covering the mouthpiece.

“She’s… tall.” Turning away he answered in a low voice. “Miche?”

Delighted, the woman began bagging the clothes up.

“Levi,” came the Section Commander’s voice on the line, “I still haven’t been able to reach Erwin.”

“Sir, will you be needing underwear?”

The woman slowly pulled back the navy blue cloth which covered the stall, unveiling a low shelf of bras in different colours. Some were frilled and elaborate, others dark and lacy. Some contained padding, wired supports and front clasps. Others were elastic, unfilled or entirely strapless it seemed. 

Levi made a small noise in the back of his throat.

“Levi?” came Miche’s voice.

Covering his cell phone once more, Levi glanced at the proprietor.

“I’ll… take all of those too.”

 On the other end of the line, Miche gave an impatient sniff.

“Look, whether Erwin’s off having breakfast or the world’s longest shit, this can’t wait,” Levi hissed, “the MPs seized a vehicle of defectors right outside our base. How can he have nothing to say about that?”

“Which size is she, sir?” The woman held up a large, padded bra helpfully.

Levi stared determinedly past her, over to where smoke rose from red brick chimneys.

“...any,” he replied faintly, lips barely moving. He blinked. Cleared his throat. 

“You didn’t hear about the traffic incident?” Miche continued, “happened last night on the central road to Mitras.” 

“The one where the pedestrian was killed?” Levi turned away from the proprietor who was now tucking numerous bras into another bag. “They found a woman’s body according to a member of my squad.”

“Worse,” Miche countered, “the vehicle that struck her was being driven by two MPs. Skidded right off the road. I’m sorry, Levi. Every one of those defectors was killed.”

(Thanks again for your questions, Val!)

[melon-fodder]

Mel if your favorite characters didn’t exist who would be your next Nr. 1 characters (from the same fandom) to selfship with? I asked Lauren this question too but I’m curious to know your answers as well 🌚

God this is SO HARD. You say number 1, but I’m taking it as like “if you couldn’t self ship with your current self ships who would it be” so for

AoT I’ve gotta knock Reiner and Miche out, so after thinking about it for like literal days, I’m gonna say I’d probably go for Bertholdt. Cause like, he is tall, he is sensitive. I’ve always liked his voice. He wears sweaters lol. (It would be so tragic though since I’d be far too invested in his best friend)

For BNHA, if I couldn’t be with Nighteye, I’d be with Aizawa. That one was fairly easy. Just going off personalities and attraction. I could easily see myself with him.

And for wind breaker, if I cojkdnt be with Hiragi, I GUESS I’d probably ship myself with Ume? That one is tough. “But what about Arima?” NO. he is my toxic ship. He is the make me cry myself to sleep and then dick me down so good that I forget why I hate him ship. But I think Ume could be fun and healthy and he’d also kept me well fed (:

[hockeyandhrsepwr]

Insufferable

Luke Hughes x reader

Basic Premise : your dating one of the Michigan Guys who went to WJ’s, but youre Canadian. After the tourney, you (& Adam) proceed to annoy your bf & the rest of the guys with the Team Canada goal song, partly because it slaps, but also because its annoying as fuck. you & Luke are childhood friends from Toronto, but you moved to Halifax after he moved to Michigan. Now you go to Mich & you’re a year older so third year, but you’ve been involved with the hockey team since your first, & youre good friends with most of the guys

Note: this is based on a random thought I had around World Juniors that I was just reminded of. Please note I am drunk as a skunk as I write this so there will be mistakes & probably things that dont make sense (timeline math wise)

January 2023, Halifax

Is it bad if I’m hoping they lose? I text my besties. Like I love Luke but I want Canada to go back to back

It takes 2 seconds for my phone start buzzing

Anne (bestie from Michigan): Fuck that you traitor!!

Mel (Hometown bestie): Haha, no. Canada for the dub baby!!!!

A: I hate both of you. Just you wait y/n, I’m showing this to Luke when I see him!

Y/n: he knows how serious I take this. I still havent forgiven Jack for 2021.

M: As much as I love supporting our boys, you have got to give that up babe. Its been 2 years

A: And wasnt it his friend who scored anyway?

Y/n: We also dont talk about him

M: Yeah, until you need someone to do Taylor Swift karaoke with at the Lake house in the summer

Y/n: fuck off, games starting, I hate you

As hard as both teams played, Canada wins & the crowd goes wild! I’m over the moon, but I know Luke will be disappointed. After the game, I make my way down towards the locker rooms with the rest of the family members that are here (not like there’s many) to wait for the boys. As they slowly make their way out & head for the bus, I spot Luke. I run over & wrap my arms around his waist, pressing a kiss to his chest.

“Sorry babe, you played so well though.”

He pulls back and raises an eyebrow “are you really that sorry?… Anne texted me.”

“Bitch” He chuckles so I know he’s not that mad “ I really did want you guys to do well. It ws just awkward that its to get to the gold medal game. If you were both in the final it be better but it didn’t work out that way this year. You’ll get that bronze though, and then im going to show you how we have a good time in Hali.”

Dropping a kiss on my nose, I see him crack a smile before something slams into my back and arms go around me.

“Hey Rut, you played great out there!”

“Not good enough”

“Hey! Dont talk like that. Time to get that bronze & then well go back to AA & get that Natty.”

“HUGHES, McGroatry, get your asses on the BUS!!! Duker I see you heading towards them. NO”

I giggle as their coach yells at Duke, but grab him for a quick hug before he can get in trouble.

“God you really are the team mom.”

“What?” “Thats what the guys say but I’ve never really noticed it before”

“That’s nice, I guess? But go babe, before you get in trouble. Tomorrow night though, youre all mine” I kiss him quickly and let him go.

Team mom? Have I somehow adopted a hockey team & not realized?

The Next Day

Team USA gets the bronze with a couple of beautiful goals from our Michigan boys. After the game, I catch up with the boys.

“Congrats!!! here’s the plan. Now I’ve got a game to watch, you’ve got shit to do, and I’ll pick you up at 10 after your team dinner & bonding shit. Get ready I’m showing you the real Halifax.”

“Love you Lukey. I’m so proud of you. I’ve got to get back to my seat but I’ll see you later”

The game is crazy but we take the gold!!! I text Luca since I know he’s here somewhere & we finally mange to find each other before making our way to the ice to congratulate Adam & the rest of the guys.

“By the way, youre coming with me tonight” I nudge Luca while Adams talking to someone else. “I’m showing the boys Halifax

“Y/n, my flight is early tomorrow morning.”

“Bro were all on the same flight. Grow a pair & come out. I need more people since the other frosh are underage”

“Hey, why can’t I come?” Adam has apparently been listening. ‘I’ve never been to Halifax before!”

“How have you been here for 2 weeks and not seen anything”

“Not with a local!! I want to see the secrets”

“Were going drinking and youre a child so you won’t be let in moron. Also dont you have team stuff?”

He’s dragged away before he can respond but I know we won’t see him for the rest of the night. Luca agrees to come, but he has to find his parents first.

My phone buzzes with a text from Luke Hey babe, think you’ll be much longer, some of the guys are tired & not sure they’ll last much longer

I text him back 30 more minutes. Tell them to take a power nap, but the only ones that’ll need to rally are you & Duker. The rest of them will be back with an hour & a half.

L: Okay babe, see you soon.

After fighting my way through the crowds, I manage to make it to the hotel the teams staying at. I enter the lobby & hear my name, since I texted Luke that I was near. There’s about fifteen of the USA guys waiting for me and I make my way over.

“First things first, who’s 19?” About half of the guys hands go up. “Okay, do you have your IDs?” Everyone nods & I clap my hands. “Alright, for those who dont know me, I’m y/n & this idiot is my boyfriend” I gesture to Luke & he wraps his arms around me. “I’m going to show you how we do shit here on the East Coast, especially those of you who are legal. For the children, I’ve got some cool stuff for you too but your night will come to an end sooner than the rest of us. Ready?”

A cheer goes up as everyone gets up & ready to go.

“One last thing, Duker needs a place to sleep tonight” “HEY!” “But you can sort that out among yourselves. Lets go!!”

The streets of Halifax are absolutely wild, but I manage to show the guys around a lot before we make our way back to the hotel. In the lobby, I give the Michigan kiddos a hug & tell them that ill see them tomorrow for the flight. “For the rest of you, Nice meeting you, im sure ill see you around!!”

We pick up Luca then make our way around downtown. once we make it to the designated bar I see a familiar face.

“MEL!!” “Ah, you made it!! congrsts on the bronze boys, but RED & WHITE TAKES THE WIN BABY!!”

“Sorry about that, she’s a bit drunk. Have fun boys, everyone has my number so text me if you can’t find me!”
“she’ll be in a corner with Luke!” “ Shut it Duke.”

Two hours later, the drinks have been flowing & were all having a great time. Luke & I are out on the dance floor, tearing it up, when the bar goes wild. Luke groans as the opening bars of an East Coast Classic start playing. “ I’m gonna hear this song in my nightmares for the next little bit”

“I mean that sucks for you but COME GET YOUR DUDS IN ORDER” I scream with the rest of the bar.

Sorry, I mouth to Luke

As the night comes to a close, I manage to round up the boys and make our way back to the hotel. All in all, a great few days here at home, but I’m ready to head back to Michigan and get on with the year.

End of January

We’ve been back for a couple of weeks & life is going well. We’re having a party for the team & various friends at one of the houses. Luke & I are chilling on one of the couches, im on his lap chatting to Anne as he talks to Duke, when Luca comes running up

“Y/n what’s the name of that song?” I have no idea what he’s talking about “Could you be any less specific? Give me something Luca”

“You know, du du dud dud” “How does that make sense Anne mutters beside me. “Yeah duh. Why?” “ Adams on the music next & needs a good lineup. He can’t remember the name”

I sit up, “oh, ill text him a playlist, I’ve got a couple of good ones to go along with it”

Luca runs off and Luke pulls me back into his chest “What are you up to?” I give him a kiss “nothing:)”

Ten minutes later, I can see that Adam is hooking his phone up, so I hop up on the coffee table & yell

“Attention folks, Adam, thanks for the tunes. It’s time I introduce you all to a couple of good old fashioned Canadian classics. I expect full enthusiasm okay? Take it Away Adam” The opening bars play and then “Twas the night that Patty Murphy died….”

By the time we get through 5 of the songs, the whole room is bumping. Luke & I are dancing, and he leans down & whispers “I know its coming, and I’m going to get you back for this” I smile up at him, “no idea what you’re talking about”

I dance my way over to Adam & Luca as the opening bars begin

“Hey boys, ready?” “Hell yeah”

“I know you know it, so sing it with me - COME GET YOUR DUDS IN ORDER….. HEAVE AWAY!!” At this point I’m back on the table doing some weird attempt at line dancing with Eddy. Of course the albertan knows how to do it. Were about halfway through the song when im thrown over Lukes shoulder, to cheers from the room

“Thank you, thank you!! Ill be back next week!” I wave as Im pulled from the room. Luke drops me on the swing on the porch before sitting down & leaning on me. “Youre infuriating”, “but you love it’ I grin and kiss him. We stay on the swing making out & cuddling for a while, looking at the stars & people watching. There’s no shortage of interesting incidents to see in a college town on a Saturday night. The the night starts dying down so I round up the boys that dont live here & start making our way back to my place across campus, dropping everyone off & making sure they get home safe before Luke & I get to mine.

All in all a great night.

Mid February

“What’s up everybody!!!!” I skate onto the ice to get the crowd going

“All right, its loud in here tonight!! So I’ve got some news for you. I know you were expecting to see our wolverines playing some of Team USA’s development guys. Unfortunately they had to pull out, but weve got something better for you all tonight! Before I let you in on it, Here are YOUR MICHIGAN WOLVERINES!!!”

The Music starts as most of the guys come rushing out of the tunnel doing a lap in front of the crowd before lining up in front of our net. Smiles all around as the crowd goes wild. Once they settle down, I start back up. 
“Thank you boys for that dramatic entrance!! Now, some of you may know me as that annoying girl who’s been on the mic at Yost for the past three years, which is valid. But what some of you might not know, is that I’m Canadian.” BOO. I hear from behind “Zip it Duker” The rest of you, Stop your booing!!! I’ve brought it up for a reason - For those of you that know me, you know that I came here for a boy. I know what youre thinking, what a dumb move, moving to another country for a boy, but I couldn’t help myself. You all know and love him, from the wolverines, number 43” The crowd starts making some noise, “QUINN HUGHES.”

The boys behind me start laughing & glance at Luke, but he knows im joking (or am I?…)

“Nah, Nah, in all seriousness, Q is like an older brother to me, so when I was figuring my life out four years ago he brought me here & I knew it was the place for me. But there is a boy, who followed me here cause im that awesome ‘hair flip’, and since there’s a very special holiday coming up”, I turn around and skate over to stand in front of Luke, looking into his eyes before turning my head

“Duker, will you be my Valentine” The arena burst out into laughter & cheers as Luke drops his stick & I try & race away from him. He grabs me by the waist before I make it more than a few metres, swinging me around before setting me back down on the ice.

“Youre going to pay for that” he whispers before dropping a kiss on my lips as a collective EW goes up from the crowd.

“Yeah yeah, get back in line lukey.” I blow him a kiss as he skates back.

“Now that thats out of the way” The crowd laughs “Duke im free at 7, you know where to find me”

“In all seriousness, you may be noticing that were missing quite a few players. Now there’s nothing wrong with them, but first let me tell you what’s about to go down. We have a couple of special guests coming to join us for this game, so lets get into it. We’re hosting the first, and probably last, USA vs Canada game, Michigan style!!”

I can tell that people are confused, so why dont we just show you?” Cheers & Boos start up, but thats alright, I. Think they’ll be pretty happy once they see what’s planned.

“First up, they may look a little different tonight, but please welcome, your Canadian wolverines!!
Starting us off tonight, you all know & love them, an inseparable duo, the bros LUCA & ADAM!!” They come out wearing Adams jerseys, pumping up the crowd & do a lap before standing behind me, just opposite their teammates.

“Next up, from the single worst province, number 73, ETHAN EDWARDS!!” The crowd roars as Eddy pretends to flip me off.

“And the last of our Ontario boys, Eric & TJ!!”

“All right, I dont know about you guys, but I’m thinking our Canadian boys need a little colour with a u” The boys snicker & Eddy fist bumps me “So please welcome some very special gents with a delivery for us. From last years championship winning team” The crowd gets so much louder “Mr ‘no one can spell your province’ Jimmy Lambert, Mr British Columbia Kent Johnson, and the big dog Owen power!!” Jimmy, KJ & OP skate out, the crowd cheering as they hold a bunch of Team Canada jerseys.

I’m glad they’re willing to play along. When Kent messaged me earlier in the year & mentioned that him & Owen were going to try & stop by for a game during the all star break, I knew it could turn into something super fun. Once I got my boss & the two guys on board, & the NTDP had pulled out a few weeks ago due to something, I started my mission. The Michigan boys had no idea what was going on until getting ready tonight, so I think it’ll be an awesome time for everyone. It also gives me an opportunity to fuck with Luke a bit which I’ll never pass up. He thinks he know what I’m up to, but I’ve still got a few tricks up my sleeve.

“Now Owen & Kent have generously donated some of their old jerseys for the players to wear tonight, so we can really represent. Will they all have the same names on the back? Yes, but they’re big kids, they’ll figure it out.” Sweeping my hands out, the boys start grabbing jerseys.

“We’ll have a quick break so that the boys can change”

“I mean they can start stripping out here, we won’t complain” I hear from the stands as laughter erupts & I point towards the children of Yost section.

“I like you, but unfortunately the on ice strip tease portion of this evening has been cancelled. It will take place in the locker room, tickets are ten dollars” I wink at the camera before turning back towards Luke. “But lets continue. we can’t play a full game with only a few on our team, so please welcome some more special guests. One of your former wolverines, Mr has lived in Vancouver so long he’s basically Canadian, Quinn Hughes!! (Bum Bum bum bummmm noise)” Lukes eyes go wide as the arena explodes with noise and Quinn comes out. I open my arms and grab him for a hug before having him stand next to me.

“Alright Quinny, how are you feeling being back?’
“honestly y/n im wondering what you have planned because if I know you, there’s something else that going to surprise me.”

“Ladies & gents, he’s known me since I was 3 so I’d say he’s got a pretty good read on me. Now number 43” “Hey!” Luke pipes up and I wave my hand in his direction to shush him, “I’m going to have you stand over there until everyones here & we can split you up.

“You’re wondering who’s next, I’m wondering why he’s here at all” Laughter & cheers from the crowd and the boys on the ice bang their sticks “we have Mr ‘ive never met anyone with greater middle child syndrome, he didn’t even go to college but refused to be left out’ from New Jersey Jack Hughes!” Jack skates out & leans towards the mic

“I would like it on the record that you asked me….” I hip check him away “That’s false. Anyway” He skates over to Luke & grabs him in one of those weird bro hugs then heads over to Quinn.

“Alright, last one then we can get going with some hockey!” The crowd roars

“Since they seem to come as a pair these days, your other favourite boy from Columbus, Nick Blakenberg!”

The crowds going wild, the boys are having a good time seeing each other & I think were about ready to get going.

“So here’s everyone. Now rapid fire, its time to split them up. We’ve got our Canadian boys. Jack, get your butt over there” He starts to protest but I hold up my hand “you know why, remember?” Raising an eyebrow at him, I see the recognition dawn. his face falls into a pout as he heads over to stand next to Owen.

“Q, I may have said youre basically Canadian but since I do love your brother, you can head over there” The smile on Lukes face as Quinn skates over & stands next to him is just adorable. God hes so cute. A mixture of Aws & Ews makes me realize that I may have said that out loud. My cheeks feel like theyre on fire as he skates over, wraps his arms around my waist & rests his chin on my head after pressing a kiss to my cheek. “Youre cute too” he whispers

“Anyway, next up, since we appear to be missing a goalie, its only fair that we get Ports! So get on over here!” Boos ring out “hey, he’s not American. That’s the literal criteria. Now here’s where it get tricky. The rest of these fine gentlemen are proud Americans, but the teams are pretty uneven. To keep things fair, we have a couple of guys who played in the BC leagues, so they’re hopping over the border for this one. So please temporarily welcome to team Canada, Holtzy, Phil, Grano Kienan & TShea!!!. Were about even now.“

The players are starting t organize themselves “Now we’ll take a five minute break so the guys can switch jerseys. Then its go time!!!” Noise inside the arena grows as I wrap my arms around Luke & he drags me off the ice.

“I love you so much, but youre absolutely insane.”

“Aw thanks babe, love you too. Now get your ass in the change room & get back out there”

I grab my Canada Hoodie that I hid next to the door earlier this morning and pull it on before hopping back on the ice. “How are we feeling? Excited?!” I pump up the crowd as I skate around. “So this is how tonights gonna go. We wont be playing a full game, since were ’not allowed to tire out the NHL guys on their break’ boo We also dont want any injuries since this is just for fun. So we won’t be too rough tonight, but instead of that final period, we’ve got a fun little game to play with the players. But first, while the rest of the boys are away I have one more visitor” I spin & open my arms up, gesturing towards the tunnel, “everyone’s favourite fashionable frenchman, Thommy B!” Bordy comes skating out and yells, “dont ever call me that again” “What, French?” Laughing,I shout back as he waves to the crowd. “So Bordy, welcome. You know a little bit about what’s going on tonight. I know youre used to wearing the red white & blue, but now its time to represent the superior country.” He laughs and sticks out his tongue. “Here come the rest of our players!!” The music gets going again as the boys come out. They cheer as they see Bordy before splitting up into their teams.

“ALL RIGHT ARE WE READY?” The noise is deafening as the boys head to their benches, but jack skates towards me. “Just so you know, Z, Turcs & a bunch of the other guys are here so it might get a bit rowdy”

“Cleary you’ve never been to a game here haha. There’s no one rowdier than the children, but I’ll keep that in mind. Where even are they?”

“They’re in the away dressing room, Quinn helped me get them in there but they’re going to come into the tunnel to watch”

“Fucking Zebras, messing up my plans. I hope they know that they’re not getting away with being here & not participating. Ive got to do some shuffling” “Y/n they dont have any gear” “Well they should have though of that before gatecrashing” I pat him on the shoulder, “dont worry jacky, I’ll sort it out, now get over there”.

“NOW, Can I please get my two representatives to centre for the puck drop, then I promise we’ll be on our way”

Luke & Adam skate up to me and get into position. We get the picture & then,

“Hey y/n, I think were missing something” Adam pipes up

“I think youre absolutely right Adam. Everyone please rise”, the crowd stands up, “it would be a shame to start without this, Lukes favourite song” He groans as the smile on my face grows infinitely bigger “Take it away” I point to the sound guys & Heave Away starts to blare from the system.

I skate around pumping up the crowd as everyone gets into it. I see a few faces from the US WJC team look like they’re trying not to enjoy themselves, but I know they like the song. Between Adam & I, We’ve played it enough. A ripple of laughter comes from the crowd as I hear skating behind me. Luke grabs me and pulls me over to the box I normally sit in, stealing my mic in the process.

“Think that’ll stop me babe? I can yell pretty loud too”

“Oh I know” he winks, “and so does the rest of the house” My mouth drops as I know what he’s insinuating. 
“Now Ive got a game to win” he says as the final notes of the song play. He turns around but I grab his jersey before he can get away, “think youre forgetting something” He kisses me quickly before getting back to centre ice.

The crowd at Yost is absolutely electric through out the game, and the boys are having a blast. Throughout the first period, I’m texting my friends & the others who work in the arena to see what they think about my plan for our gatecrashers.

(I can’t describe a game to save my life, despite having watched hockey since I was a kid, so just use your imagination for whats actually going on on the ice:) )

First intermission comes up, and the Canada side is leading, obviously. The boys head to the dressing rooms, and the music starts going. I head back to the dressing rooms to deal with the new guys. I crack the door to the away room & Yell

“You better be decent, im coming in” before pushing the door. A few guys my ass, I think as I take in half of the team jack played with in the program & a bunch of young NHL guys.

“Sup Mase” I stick out my fist. “Long time. Matty, Briss, Beech, nice to see you.”

“Trevor” I narrow my eyes at him

“Okay, I wasn’t expecting any of you but I have something for you. Since you idiots, Zegras & Cole im looking at you, didnt assume that I’d make you participate, none of you have gear. Luckily for you, we’ll be able to scrounge some stuff up. Follow ME!” I walk out and they file out behind me. Over to the Michigan dressing room, which is a little bit full right now.

“Hey boys, im coming in” I dont bother checking before opening the door, they’re pretty used to it by now.

“Jesus Christ its like a minefield in here” I have tp jump over a couple of things and dodge equipment as I make my way over to Luke before plopping on his lap. “Apparently we have some additional guests” I sweep my hands towards to door as heads poke in. “& We need some equipment. Ive talked to Joe (equipment manager) & he’s seeing what he can find. But I wanted to ask if anyone minds letting them borrow a stick?” Luke rests his head on my shoulder as we watch the chaos, as guys jump up to say hey, chat & just have a good time. “Is it bad that I’m excited to see what you make them do?” He says. “Nope” I grin, “ they have no idea what’s coming”.

The horn blares and the gatecrashers leave so the rest of the guys can head back to the ice.

“Just to remind you guys” I say once the cheering had died down “ were only going to be playing 2 periods of hockey, but We have something pretty fun to replace that third period. Now Lets get back to it!!”

Th game restarts and its awesome to watch. Its face paced but still clearly a fun game. Watching Luke & Quinn play on the same line has me smiling like an idiot since I know how much Luke had wanted to play with him in a game setting. Its pretty special & I’m glad I could make it happen.

The final horn sounds, and ‘Canada’ wins, but all the guys are joking around & having fun so I know there not taking it too seriously. Which is good.

“Alright alright, how was that?” Roars from the crowd tell me that they liked it. “First I want to say thank you to all of our players for being such good sports about this, and a huge thanks to everyone who came back. Thanks for going along with my crazy idea, I think we’ve made tonight pretty memorable for everyone!” Yells of agreement come from all around me.

“I promised you a replacement for the third period, so lets get into it

The reason that so many of our hockey alumni can be here tonight is because of the NHL All Star break! Since none of them were invited to the All Star weekend, except Jack, who is still here for some inexplicable reason, I decided that we’ll give them a chance to show off their skills here, just like the skills competition but with no prep. Who needs Florida when you can be here? !” Cheers come from the crowd as they agree with me.

“Originally We had a couple of our Michigan guys & our Alumni who were going to be doing this, not that they knew that, but in true middle child fashion,” more laughs, “Jack had to make it about him & bring a few friends. So please welcome some of the most annoying guys ive ever met, Trevor Zegras, Cole Caulfield and Alex Turcotte”, cheers & boos ring out. “ I know, Wisconsin & BU suck, but since they decided to crash my event, they have to participate. We’ve also got special appearances from DUNDUDUUH Mason McTavish, reuniting him with is bestie Kent, go team Canada! And MAKE SOME NOISE FOR YOUR FORMER WOLVERINES, Matty Beniers, Brendan Brission, Jonny Beecher, Cam York & Josh Norris!!” The boys make their way onto the ice, sliding around & The noise turn deafening.

“Well I guess we know who the favourites are huh? Now you may be noticing, none of these gentlemen have any gear Again, they decided to crash but didn’t plan ahead, so they’re at a disadvantage. We’ve managed to find some sticks of them but that’s about it. Back to what’s happening next. The teams, Canada & US, will each pick five players to show off their skills. A few exceptions, KJ, Jacky, Blanks & Mackie have to do it, as do all of our interlopers. Portillo will be in net. Sort it out boys, you’ve got until I finish with our judges. Judging today, We’ve got Joe the equipment manager, the real star of this team, representing the student section, Annie & Tim, both 4th year students who work as Student trainers, and A woman who has who know exactly what she’s talking about when it comes to hockey, and is used to wrangling boys, its Mama Hughes!!” Our judges come out to one of the benches waving.

“Gentlemen, ARE YOU READY?” Nods all around. “If youre participating, line up single file at centre, everyone else, get out of the way!”

The crowd gets going again as the players split up. “I’m sure youre all a bit sick of me, so I’m going to pass the mic to my colleague Bob, who you may recognize. He’s going to be commenting on this portion of the evening, but I’lll be back soon!” I skate over & give Ellen a hug before handing out whiteboards & markers as the competition gets underway. I’m pretty impressed by what some of these guys have managed to come up with given the time crunch. I’m doodling on my own whiteboard, creating my masterpiece. Im also keeping track of the scores. Luckily Jack & Trevor are going last so I have some time. I lean my head on Ellen’s shoulder as she laughs at Mackies performance. “Thanks for doing this, I know it was a bit random” I say, & she wraps an arm around me

“I’m having a blast & I know all the boys are too. Youre coming to dinner tomorrow right?” “Wouldn’t miss it.”

“I’ve never been more glad that we moved next door to you in Toronto. You make him so happy” I look up & lock eyes with Luke as she says this, a dopey grin on his face. holy shit I’m gonna cry. “You can’t make me cry right now Ellen, I haven’t embarrassed jack & Z yet. I can’t be crying when I do that.” We both laugh as Bill says, “& here come our final contestants, a dynamic duo Hughes number 2 & Zegras” they do pull off something pretty sweet, but I hold up my board when the rest of the judges do.

(Drawing of the Ducks Mascot saying “you suck Z”)

He laughs at it so I know he doesn’t think I’m too serious, and I stand up. That’s my cue.

“Alright how was that?!” The crowd goes nuts.

“Thanks to our four judges for your time. And now, the winner of the 2023 skills comp is “drumroll please”, number 11, Mackie!!!”

Bob skates out with the prize, which I think is pretty dope. We found a vintage Michigan Hockey sweat set & letterman jacket which looks cool as fuck, so im glad they were willing to let us give it away. I pass it to him & he takes a victory lap, taunting the other boys.

“Since this is a game, We’ve got something for our winners. The NHL gives a million dollars, but that boring (and im poor) so instead, we have something else for our boys!” The crowd cheers & bill skates towards me with a box. The teams line up opposite each others, & we skate in between them. I pass out the trophies, adorned with little maple leafs & filled with chocolate. “You were confident eh?” Kent says when I pass him his. “Duh” everyone laughs. we finish passing them then I address the crowd again.

“If you’ll direct your attention towards the screens,” everyone turns “ I have a special message from a couple of our participants.” A video of Cam, Jack, Trevor & Beecher pops up from when they were like 17. They’re wearing their USA jerseys and everyone laughs. Not them though. They know what’s coming. I press play & the singing starts “we Aren’t the champions, we aren’t the champions” Ive been sitting on this one for years. Its from the summer that year when I visited & we had some kind of competition. Their team lost, so Quinn & I made them change the lyrics to reflect that they lost. (I have no idea, Just need something that would be embarrassing).

‘Thank you gentlemen for that, I needed an occasion to play that & this seems like everyone enjoyed it” The crowd laughs along.

“Now, we need to crown an MVP. The way I’m going to to this is: each team pick 3 players, & then you, the crowd, will determine our MVP based on how loud you cheer. Teams you have 1 minute to offer your sacrifices.”

I skate over to the bench. “Now some of you may know that the NHL MVP gets a car, so we decided to stay on theme, but you know we do things better here at Michigan! Thanks to a donation from a generous alumni **Cough cough quinny** the 2023 MVP of our game will get, drumroll please” Everyone in the arena starts making noise and the boys start banging sticks and hollering, The Zamboni door opens & out drives Bill, in a little navy blue jeep (Like the ones for kids to drive) as laugher breaks out from everyone.

“So boys, can I get your top three please! Join me at centre ice.” Owen, Luke, Luca, Rutger, Ethan & Nick come towards me & line up in that order.

Alright, its up to you.” I skate over to Nick & hold my hand above his head Listening as the noise grows. “Decent. Next up” Im make my way down the line, each boy getting the crowd going. They’re all a bit taller, but I can still reach above them, until I get to Luke. I jump on his back & the crowd goes wild. “Last up, Owen! I think ill need some help here, Luke care to contribute?” He scoops me up & lifts me “im a bird!” People laugh & I hold my hand above Owen. Noise grows again. “So to avoid being called out for bias” “YOU ARE” a couple of the players yell “and giving it to my boy OP” Luke pretends to stumble & drops me back onto the ice as laughter rings out. I lean over & whisper, “ill get you for that” I right myself and continue “I’ve asked our skills judges to determine who the crowd got loudest for. On the count of three, please hold up your boards. 1, 2,3!!”They flip them around and I see one for Owen, one for Rutger, one for Luke & then Ellen flips hers, displaying Rutgers name. “Mom seriously!” I snicker as Luke yells in indignation & Ellen shrugs “Alright folks, there you have it. Your MVP!Rutger, Bill has the keys. Now you can stop stealing Luca’s Moped and drive this bad boy around campus.” He goes to sit in it & everyone laughs. “Okay, Thats all from me tonight. I just want to say a massive thank you again to all our alumni for participating and giving up part of your break to be here. To my boss & the rest of the team staff, thanks for trusting me on this & basically giving me free reign.” “Bad idea” one of the boys chirps “Thanks for going along with what was a bit of a harebrained idea that I think turned out pretty fun for all” the crowd agrees with me, “And thanks to all our guys for being such good sports about the change in programming. I’m not going to keep you here any longer, so Thank you & Goodnight!!” The crowd screams & cheers as I wrap my arms around Luke. “Oh before I forget, allow us to play you out with this teams favourite party playlist. Once more, for CANADA, Billy you know what I want” A thumbs up from the sound guy “COME GET YOUR DUDS IN ORDER!!”

I pass the mic to someone as they skate past, and Luke & I skate in a circle. “Youre incredible, you know that?’ He drops his forehead to mine. “Glad you finally see it” I chuckle. “Did you have fun” “are you kidding babe? I dont think ive ever had as much fun playing a game, & playing with Quinn was awesome. I can’t believe you pulled this off” Suddenly my song cuts out & he breathes a sigh or relief “oh thank god”

I lift my head to see who’s messing with it, when Luke spins me around & I see Quinn with the mic, Bordy & Duke skating towards me. Now that I look, none of the boys have left the ice.

“Sorry everyone, We’ll be quick. There’s one person who is entirely responsible for tonight, and we think that she needs some applause! Give it up for y/n l/n” I think im going to go deaf with how loud the barn gets, or maybe its just from Luke yelling in my ear. My face is bright red & I try to turn into Lukes chest, but he keeps me in position. Bordy grabs the mic “You’ve been an important part of this team for the past three years, even before Luke, and We wanted to do something to show our thanks. since some of us had a bit more notice” “We found out 30 minutes before you guys” duke pipes up gesturing to the crowd “Anyway, we have a little something for you to show our thanks” Duke pulls out a bouquet of flowers from behind his back and passes them to me. “I knew you were in love with me Duker. Does this mean you accept my valentine?” The boys that can hear me laugh, and Bordy keeps going “ you can thank Quinn for organizing this one, but Drumroll please” Banging from around the arena grows “Your very own Michigan jersey” He holds it up & flips it around to show my name on the back. My mouth drops, “Thats dope! Holy shit!’ I pass Luke the flowers & take it, pulling it on over my hoodie. “Guys this is awesome, thank you!” “One last thing,” Quinn says, as he produces a jacket from behind his back, the same kind that we used as the skills prize. Apparently there were two of them laying around. “Oh hell yeah! Mackie & I are going to look so much cooler than all of you!” They all laugh as I try to hug the three of them at once, before pulling back. “Alright, thats really all that we have for you tonight,’ Quinn says, addressing the crowd, “so well let you get out of here. Billy, lets get the music back on!” The next song plays as im grabbed by Luke & suddenly surrounded by the whole team. I’m crushed into a hug with most of them, laughing. I get out & manage to give everyone a quick hug before I make my way back to Luke, who’s now chatting to his mum & brothers. “What’s the plan now y/n?” Jack asks. “Man I dont know, do I have to plan everything?” He laughs. “The boys were talking about a party at the senior house, but im not sure if well fit everyone.” “We can try babe” Luke says “I’m going to go get changed & see what they’re thinking” he kisses me before heading towards the dressing room About thirty minutes lates, we’re finally leaving the arena. Luke & I are grabbing dinner but then its to the house to party. Some of the boys are doing the booze run, but everyones heading over there pretty soon. We grab a quick bite at one of the places we love and make our way down the road. We get to the house but the doors locked. I text one of the boys and they come, but the music cuts out once the door opens. “Ladies & gentlemen,” Nolan, who opened the door yells “The woman of the hour, Y/N!!!” The boys cheer as we step into the house & I laugh. Half of them are blasted already, but we catch up pretty quick. By the time the end of the night rolls around, I’ve seen thing I never wanted to (Shudder), but I’ve had fun, and I know this is the kind of night that ill remember forever.

ESPN Broadcast:

The biggest news coming out of the hockey world this week is surprisingly not the All star weekend. Absolutely everyone has been talking about the University of Michigan. On Friday night, fans were treated to a different kind of show. When introducing the night, host y/n l/n, a close family friend of the Hughes family, declared that it was a “Canada vs USA’ game, filled with the current roster & various alumni. I think a lot of people were sceptical, but once the night go going the crowd were really into it. We saw some of the leagues young stars I dont know about you but I absolutely loved the idea and the fans did too. A 2 period game took place, and If you want to see more, check the broadcast from that night, it was great, fun hockey, not too serious but very entertaining. Fans were shocked as more young stars made their way onto the ice, as they replaced the final period with a mini skills competition.

The event was live-streamed on social media & got fans around the country interested. Comments on social media included:

The NHL could really take some tips from the Michigan game this weekend. Ten times more entertaining than All Star.

Y/N has to be one of the most chaotic commentators that Ive ever seen, but She makes it work. Absolutely hilarious.

Luke Hughes Girlfriend, Y/n, doing nothing but roast jack was hilarious. I need to know what he did to get “punished” by wearing a Canada jersey though

I need to see y/n commentating the All Star game in the future, she ws great!

Fuck the All Star weekend, I need a repeat of that Michigan game next year!

I go to OSU but I would’ve loved to be in Yost last night.

Y/n putting on a whole ass game just so her boyfriend can play on the same line as his favourite brother. I see you girl.

NHLers even got involved, with stars like Dylan Larkin tweeting “can’t believe I didn’t get an invite @/YnLn” and other notable alumni echoed the sentiment. Former Captain & Goalie Strauss Mann got in on it, commenting “ damn thats what I get for taking care of you your first year huh? I’ll remember this”.

“HOLY SHIT. LUKE!! They’re talking about me on ESPN! What the fuck? “

Bonus:

Frozen four finals

Broadcaster:

We’ve just been informed of one last change to tonights final game, the University of Michigan have decided to switch their goal song for tonight to pay tribute to someone. You know as much as we do, so hopefully we’ll get a chance to hear it tonight as our game gets underway.

Xx

[fatlevisimp]

In Time. (Levi Ackerman/Attack on Titan Fan Fiction)

Chapter 12: Miche.

Authors Note: Okay, now I know a lot of this might be in the wrong order, but i'm just taking the flashbacks from throughout the first mission with eren and placing them in some sort of order, all I know is all of this is within a month running up to the first mission with the new recruits so these will be my own events with the flashbacks included. 

"So why am I heading back to the barracks?" Diana asked Miche as they stood outside the courthouse. Miche did not reply, only leaned close to Diana and inhaled deeply. Diana flinched, dipping slightly away from him, his face full of confusion. 

"Oh, don't mind Miche, he thinks he can know a person through giving them a good sniff," Hange explained as they returned to Diana with two horses. Diana turned to Miche, who'd finished sniffing her and laughed. 

"So, how do I smell?" She asked him with a smirk. Miche returned a slight smirk to her but didn't say a word. 

"Okay, so I guess I'll ask you, Hange-"

"I am escorting you to the barracks so you can collect Eren's and your own belongings, and then I shall take you to meet with the special ops squad." Miche finally spoke, his voice somewhat comforting to Diana. She smiled at Miche. 

"He speaks?" Miche flashed a small smile back to Diana. 

"Also, you smell lovely." A blush slowly crept onto Diana's cheeks, and she looked away. 

"Miche, " Hange warned. Now, Diana, this is your horse. Her name is Maia. You've ridden before, yes?" They then asked. Diana smiled at the white horse. It was beautiful—almost pure white, with brown patches over her body. 

"Yes, I have, when I was younger," Diana confirmed with a small smile. Hange beamed. Before handing Diana the reins, Miche also took the reins to his horse and swiftly jumped on. 

"Good, well, safe journey. Remember to grab some of Eren's things, too. You'll be meeting the Specials Ops squad at nightfall to travel to the old scout base, so do not waste too much energy!" Hange chirped. As Diana climbed upon her horse, she gently stroked its mane, gently whispering in its ear to keep it calm. Miche stared at her in almost awe, but he kept quiet. 

"Okay, shall we go!" Diana beamed; Miche only nodded before the two said their goodbyes to Hange and took off. Diana grinned as widely as she could as the two bound down the street, enjoying the wind that lapped through her hair. Her mind wandered back to her childhood, how she loved riding in the spring when the smell of fresh flowers whipped through the air. A wave of sorrow flooded Diana's mind; those were the lost days, her home, and her family, and they were all gone now. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Don't take too long. It's almost nightfall, and we need to meet the special ops squad asap." Miche ordered as he dismounted his horse. 

"I know Miche, I don't need to grab much,"  Diana spoke, climbing off her horse; she sent Miche a small smile before heading to her room. She grabbed her necessities, spare clothes, cigarettes, and books, packing them into a bag before heading to Eren's room. She tried to avoid her comrades, though it would be nice to talk to them, as she knew Miche and herself were in quite a rush to make it to the Special Operations squad on time. 

After avoiding a run-in with Reiner, Diana made it to Eren's room. She grabbed his spare clothes and personal items before throwing them in her bag. She quietly crept out of Eren's dorm, gently closing the door. 

"Hey Dee!" Armin's voice caught Diana off guard, making her jump. She turned to him with a frown. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Are you okay?" he asked her. 

"I'm fine, Armin, but I have to go!" Diana sputtered as she began to walk away. 

"Is Eren okay? What's going on?" Armin questioned, catching up to her. 

"He's fine. I'm meeting with the Special Ops squad at nightfall. We're riding to the old scout base. I really have to go, Armin. I'll catch you later!" Diana rushed away from Armin as they got outside, heading back over to Miche, who sent her a small nod before taking the bags off her. He hooked them up to her horse as she remounted. Diana sent one last smile to Armin before Miche took off, with Diana following. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The two reached the Special Ops squad, making small talk on the way. Diana liked Miche, though he didn't talk too much. Diana enjoyed Miche's company. Levi watched on as Miche helped Diana down off her horse, a frown forming on his face as he watched Diana smile at Miche as she thanked him. He rolled his eyes and turned away, his gaze falling on Petra. Her eyes lit up as they met Levi's, and she smiled. 

"Right, let's move. We've got quite a way to go, " Levi ordered, pulling Diana's attention from Miche. Diana took one of the bags to Eren, attaching it to his horse. 

"Are you okay?" She asked quietly. Eren smiled down at her. 

"I'm fine, Dee; stop worrying." Diana nodded and smiled back. 

"Lando! Hurry up!" Levi's voice pulled the smile from Diana's lips, and her face dropped to a glare as she turned away from Eren and made her way to her horse. 

"Goodbye, Miche. It was lovely meeting you." He nodded at her before swiftly leaving. Diana mounted her horse before the squad began to move. 

[watching-sam-and-dean-again]

Season 7: Deaths Door

So, I’m watching a reactor who just got to this episode. Yes, this is another post based around reaction videos. No it’s not the same one I wrote about last time (if I have any followers who keep track). Yes, I have a reactors on the go currently, and sadly, two of them are on seasons I don’t like much (Season 7 and Season 15), so it’s a bit rough going right now.

Anyway, I think the episode where Bobby dies is a good one, though it is definitely sad. There are quite a few moments that really stand out for me. First, Dean punching the glass when the organ donor guy comes to talk to him while Bobby is still alive is really impactful. You understand and empathize with Dean so hard in that moment, and I think he showed unusual restraint in punching the glass rather than the man. My guy, what the hell are you doing asking someone about organs while their loved one is fighting for their life? Next, Sam pressing on his palm while he tries to wrestle with the reality of Bobby dying is heartbreaking to me. I think this is a moment that some people miss, but it hurts so much while it reminds me that Sam, while he mostly looks okay on the outside, is still dealing with the aftermath of his soul being locked in the cage with Lucifer for 180 years. The guy is struggling with reality on a daily basis, thinks he doesn’t have it so bad just because others experience "worse," and is now losing his surrogate dad. Finally, Bobby's memories of the boys being just totally average little moments of them acting like typical brothers is very wholesome. Though, I enjoy all of Bobby’s memories (Rufus!) and what they show us about Bobby. Really good episode overall.

Now, here is where my … problem (I guess I’ll go with that term) comes in. I like this reactor because they are entertaining, and they tend to try look at things from both brothers' points of view most of the time, but they said two things that irked me a bit while watching the episode, especially because they seem to be opinions shared by a lot of viewers. Obviously opinions are going to be subjective, so I don’t think this reactor is being unfair. I just don’t fully agree. First, they said that they feel especially bad for Dean in this episode because he has been through so much. Second, they suggest that Bobby's death might be harder on the boys because Bobby was more of a father to them than John was.

Please see my thought under the cut

So, tackling the first idea, I don’t object to feeling bad for Dean this season or the idea that he has been through too mich. At all. I object to the implied idea that he has somehow been through more or worse than Sam at this point in the show, and thus deserves more sympathy. Excuse me, but, what!? Let’s not delve all the way back through their history because that could go on forever, instead let’s just look at Season 6 and Season 7 (up to this point).

Let’s start with Dean. He experienced the pain of having a soulless Sam back, who didn’t particularly care about him. This is essentially one of his worst nightmares, so I understand him reeling from this for a while. He gained and lost a family, and picked up a heap more loss and guilt to deal with from leaving them. He was betrayed by his "best friend," who also hurt his brother just to stop Dean from interfering with his purgatory plan. He has to "deal with" Sam suffering from hallucinations. He broke a leg. He’s had to temporarily give up his baby. And now Bobby, his surrogate dad, is dying. These are all very hard things, and I truly feel bad for Dean having to go through them, but he’s also done things to add to his own misery this season, like kill Amy and lie to Sam about it and drink his face off instead of coping with his depression and guilt. Dean is his own worst enemy, and it sometimes affects the empathy I have for him.

Now, let’s look at Sam. Since Season 6, Sam has to come to terms with the fact that while he was soulless he did absolutely terrible things, things that he has to now remember and live with, even though in his normal state he never would have done them. He was also betrayed by Cas. First, Cas brought him back soulless, and while I don’t think he knew what exactly was wrong with Sam, he knew something was off and then proceeded to ignore Sam when he reached out to him about it. Then, he betrayed him by breaking his hell-wall just to distract Dean; he risked destroying Sam's mind entirely just to get Dean out of his way. Now, Sam is the one who is actually suffering from hallucinations, which have never gone away up to this point, rather he just learns to distinguish them from reality and go about his business. The show doesn’t remind us of this constantly, so I kind of understand audiences not actively thinking about this. Still, what Sam is experiencing in Season 7 is horrific. On top of all this, he’s worrying about Dean because of his drinking and depression. And now he too is losing Bobby, and he didn’t even have a sweet one-on-one memory to fall back on with Bobby unless he did and it just wasn’t significant enough for Bobby to remember. While Cas' betrayal probably hurt Dean more because Cas was closer to him at this point, what he did still has to hurt Sam, too; it even made him wonder if Cas brought him back soulless on purpose.

Now, my whole point with this is not that people should feel worse for Sam than Dean, but that it seems crazy to me to feel more empathy for Dean than Sam at this point. Dean has to worry about Sam's mental state, but Sam is the one living it. Meanwhile, Sam is worried about Dean's mental state, which is poor partially because of what’s happening with Sam these codependent boys have both been through way too much in the last Season and a half alone. Just because Sam isn’t as demonstrative with his emotions as Dean a lot of the time doesn’t mean he isn’t also in pain. So, I empathize strong,y with both of them in this situation of losing Bobby on top of everything else.

Finally, the idea that Bobby is Sam and Dean "real" dad is one I always take issue with. John is not perfect by any means, but he did love his sons. He literally sold his soul to save Dean. This is not nothing. Dean has fond memories of him, and Sam had a nice moment with him and laughed with him in "Dead Man's Blood." When John first sees his boys after months (years for Sam) apart, he hugs them both. This is not a dad who doesn’t love his kids. His harshness was a result of fear for the boys most of the time, not unlike how Dean treated Ben when he was worried about him and Lisa at the end of Season 6. I’m not saying this is right, or that he couldn’t be too harsh, but they are living extraordinary experiences. John raised his kids like soldiers, but if he hadn’t they’d probably have died sooner. And the fact that they called him Sir, didn’t mean that he was only a Drill Sargent to them. Moreover, even though John made a ton of mistakes, his death was absolutely devastating for both Sam and Dean. Bobby on the other hand, may have "adopted two boys" in his heart, but he wasn’t perfect either. He’s been harsh with both of them at times, sometimes fairly, other times not as fairly, and he clearly has a favorite, which isn’t ideal in a father figure. Yes, he brought Dean to play catch, but an uncle might do that too, and did he ever do something like that for Sam? I like Bobby, I really do, and I think he’s a good surrogate but he is not their "real" dad, either. And while a terrible blow, I don’t think his death has equal impact on the boys to John’s.

Anyway, that’s it on this one. Thanks for reading, if you made it this far.

What are your thought any of this?

[choshasan]

Question for the transmasc

and transfem if you switch a couple words, input from anyone is welcomed to answer♡

[TL;DR at the end, just scroll to the last paragraph before the tags]

Any other transmasc, specifically ftm trans guys, like...

Don't feel comfortable with the term "man" or "boy" to describe them, but like.. is much more comdortable with "guy" and "dude"?

Like.. saying I'm a man doesn't feel right it feels too.. aggressive?? I guess.. for my lil twink self

And saying I'm a boy feels downright degrading,

But I do struggle a lot with my age.. like.. legally, I'm 19, but my brain genuinly does not feel like it's aged, and it does not feel like time's passed since I was 16, I did go through massive autistic burnout that started around when I was 12 and got at it's worse when I was 16, literally not having any social interactions, not seeing the sun, staying in my room either sleeping or bawling my eyes all day, being physically and mentally in constant pain and so on, and it's gotten slightly better over the past 3 years, but I know it's still not fully healed..

I also, while not explicitely *preffered*, I've never minded being called they/them or it/its, or like.. any pronouns really that aren't she/her, but preffered pronouns are he/him, like.. they and it I am impartial to, just.. "kay", he/him feels like ":D! He??? Me?! You consider me He??? :D?! [Insert gremlin laugh]!"

I'm also very comfortable with certain aspects of femininity, I have two posts speaking on this already, but I will gladly repeat myself-ish here,

I like a lot of fem nicknames, like Princess, babygirl, doll, and so on,

I also really like fem clothes, I wear leggings, (tmi but,) my prefered underwear style are thongs, despite the fact I never wore one when I identified as a girl, I like fishnets, ruffles, lace, and while I don't wear them because of dysphoria, I do want to wear dresses, cropped tops, body suits and the such once I have top surgery, I also LOVE Gyaru fashion and all the more fem-"over the top" fashions like coquette, rococo, cottagecore, and so on, I've never liked seeing myself in a suit or such, I don't dislike masc fashion either though, I like a lot of more masc-leaning fashion, I've always really loved japanese men's streetwear amd the such, I just wear a lot less men's clothes because of sensory issues, the way they're cut just feels icky and overwhelming on my skin.. most of my shirts are Unisex cut and such..

I'm also very open to makeup, aka, I literally feel self concious going out of the house with no makeup on, I do a lot of Isabel Larosa inspired looks, and very very hyperfem looks, lots of pinks and glitter, I often go on pinterest and look up "pink angel makeup" for inspos, I like anything shiny, irridescent, bedazled, glittery, sparkly and so on.. I love bold, bright colors, I also do a lot of grunge makeup, and fantasy makeup, like vampire makeups and such, my prefered makeup styles really have a wide range but I'd say I gravitate more often towards either slutty girl who had a bit mich to drink and did a few too many drugs last night to remember what happened at the party, and adorable little angel princess..

But like.. all that doesn't make me feel like less of a "man" either, I feel self concious of my chest and my weight, but that's it,

Though, I can't stand having long hair, that falls a lot more into the category of sensory issues than dysphoria.. it just annoys me, feeling it grow, and I have really thick hair, to the point it gives me headaches, so I do always have my sweet little undercut that keeps ¾ of my hair gone, but yeah, again, sensory issues..

I know like.. the way I grew up probably played into how I am with my gender expression today, I grew up with a mother that always told me itnwas okay to dress however I wanted and be myself, and I grew up loving ballet and figure skating, specifically men's figure skating, admireibg men like Yuzuru Hanyu, I also grew up watching anime a lot, where traps, femboys and twinks are common and rarely questioned, and as I grew up, I also really got into Kpop, Jpop and Vkei, where more feminine men and straight up crossdressing is a lot more "normal" and accepted, and like, from the start, I always gravitated more towards the guys in Vkei that crossdress (to my understanding) or have a more fem appearance like Sena(Jiluka), Boogie(jiluka), Mana-sama(ex-malice mizer), and such, I always loved more cutesy ment like Lovesick's Hayate, and in Kpop, I always looked up to not only the more androgynous/fem guys like Felix(skz), Hyunjin(skz) & Seonghwa(ateez), I also always loved the ones that embrace that they're not "big manly men" while still viewing themselves as men, Like changbin(skz) who's always okay with doing cutesy stuff and like actor Ma Dong-seok, and while I do love big manly men, I always like it when there's a touch of cutesy, sweetness, femininity into them, even if the lot of the things I'd consider in there would probably be considered just beasic normal human things by anyone with more than 2 braincells, but still, in the world we live in.. a big muscular man does, very much make me swoon when he can cook and do laundry...

Anyway, what I'm saying is,

TL;DR: I do feel like a guy, but I preffer femininity over masculinity and like, I have an odd relation to how I feel my gender identity, based on description alone, I feel a lot more like someone who's agender or non-binary, but I truly just.. feel comfort identifying as a dude, and I do truly mean dude, or guy, not "man" not "boy" just.. dudebro... am just a lil guy ✨️