#1 800 iluvhockey fic

[1-800-iluvhockey]

slipping through my fingers - hughes siblings

warnings - mild language, mini angst & sadness (not everything will be accurate as it’s fiction lol), it is a very long fic and has two instagram edits as well

please listen with slipping through my fingers by abba <33

hey it’s me again. I sent you guys four tickets to graduation & I hope you guys can make it! mom & dad already told me they could make it, and q said that he is flying in for it. I hope you three can make it! it would mean the world to me— please…. I’ll talk to you soon j! love ya— bye.

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

college graduation.

the one thing that y/n had been dreading since she started at umich…. leaving. home was here. so many good memories here, as well as meeting her bestest friends & boyfriend. but it was time to go— and it just felt like

time slipped away from her.

she was glad that she was convinced by q to come here, and then got to share some of her college years with her twin brother luke. y/n always felt like she was forgotten by her siblings as she didn’t excel at hockey and that she was a girl. they loved her, and she loved them— but the distance between them was enough for her to feel like she didn’t get enough time to grow up with them. she wanted to not stand in their way, but still cheer them on. so, when quinn— her oldest brother convinced her to go to umich instead of boston college, she felt seen. she felt even more seen when luke — her own twin was petitioning for her to go to college with him.

“cmon sis— we can take on the world from ann arbor together! come with me!!” luke pleaded at the family dinner table as ellen gave her daughter a “it’s up to you, scholarships have been coming in for you for years to go to anywhere you want sweetie. lu is going for athletics— and you are our ms. academics! that would be amazing but you know that it is your choice, honey.”

“okay lu on just one condition……. don’t push me away.” she told her older brother she got tackled into a bear hug from the side.

“YES!! 3 to mich baby!!!” q yelled as her two older brothers got up and joined the hug.

“guess I’m the odd one out now…” jack joked as he saw y/n’s smile grow bigger by the minute.

“I love you hockey idiots.” she said as she meted into her older brother’s hug.

y/n got to be his cheerleader sister for the two years as became one of the greatest young players in college hockey. her friend group intermingled with his— and she even had a thing with his friend mark estapa for awhile. until they all left after their sophomore year, as expected. they had big nhl contracts & big bucks coming in. no one was more proud than y/n of her boys, she bought all of their jerseys, went to as many games as she could all while being in school.

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

junior year started and she had earned an internship for the red wings. a dream come true as she has always wanted to be in the hockey industry some how. it felt as it was a birthright that she started to fulfill. y/n was on cloud 9 when she called her dad and said that she had started with the red wings as an intern assistant pt to the head physical therapist to the red wings organization. her parents were ecstatic as they knew how important it was to her.

on one of the first games, she met him— simon. he had came into the locker room with a bad shoulder injury during a game while y/n was “on deck” aka waiting for someone to give her someone to work on. he came in with a bloody nose and a out of place shoulder— and changed her whole life.

“hey— you think that you can fix this and we can go out some time?” he asked her as she looked to the side to see him smirking at her with a little bit of blood on his nose still. she had only met him 20 minutes ago and he was asking HER out.

“maybe— we still need to get this blood off. my brother may add some if he knew though.” she joked as they both laughed. she was nervous. guys aren’t normally like this to her without knowing her family.

“I think you will be worth the risk, ms dr in training hughes.” he winked and put the ice pack back on his nose.

“hughes? you know who I am?” she questioned stupidly as he smiled at her. he looks down to her name tag that says “y/n hughes— physical therapy & sports medicine assistant” with the red wings logo on it & her little flower doodles. her eyes look down to her name tag— and she feels herself turning pink.

“right— my name tag. duh.” she says laughing off her awkward question as she turns to grab some k-t tape for his shoulder.

her back was turned as he started “of course— but that’s not how I know you. I saw you on draft night on tv. luke was no.4 overall and I was no.6. I followed you on instagram after that. I thought you were cute, despite all of the hockey glory family & scary older brothers to go through. you seemed so sweet & cared a lot about hockey. I just didn’t know I’d actually get to meet you…..” simon semi ranted as y/n turned bright pink at his words.

she turned around and he saw her turn pink, and he smiled at it. she was cute, in a way that was different from the rest. the compassion & intelligence radiated from her making her stand out in a way that caught his eye.

“okay— one date edvinsson. but first let’s get your shoulder back in place & get you healed up.” y/n said in return of his semi rant as she quickly popped his shoulder back in. she kept him company for the rest of the game, getting him more ice water as they talked & watched the game. it was relaxing, the pair got to have a calm moment in their “stressful” lives.

he didn’t care who she was the sister of— or what family she was from. he was a genuine, caring guy who wanted to be with her. she loved him— she loved everything about her life when he stepped— ran into it with his injury stunt that night. date after date, their relationship went from flirtatious friends to a private but secret relationship. no one knew who got them whipped— but each other.

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

the rest of junior year flew by, as well as her internship with the red wings. at the end of the season, after a great time she was promoted from an intern to a part time assistant for the red wings in her department. summer came & she spent most of it at the lake w/ simon. her parents loved him, and her brothers had no idea of her relationship yet due to the fact they have had summer hockey and couldn’t come home. again, she felt that time slipped away as her brothers wouldn’t even call any more, or text her to check up on her like she did to them.

one night at the lake, the university called & told her that after she graduated that she would have a guaranteed spot for their graduate program, which would have hours for her to go work for the red wings. simon was sitting next to her, trying to watch his girlfriend’s odd expressions on the phone.

“yes— thank you! thank you so much. I cannot wait to sign. alright — see you in a few weeks then!” y/n then quickly hung up, looking over at her confused boyfriend. they were sitting on the dock as she got the call.

“who was that? signing? I’m confused.” he asked her as she leaned over to kiss him happily.

“guess who’s becoming a wolverine again! and a redwing!” she said ecstatically as simon jumped up.

“WHAT?!” he said excited as she jumped up and hugged him tightly.

“yeah!!! I got the graduate program spot & it will let me go part time with the red wings now— this is it!” y/n told him as he spun her around.

“my girlfriend with her big girl job & big girl graduate school!! I’m so proud of you baby. you deserve the world!!” he told her as she started to tear up.

“I— I love you so much si— thank you for being here.” she told him as they held hands walking back up to the house so she can tell her parents.

“always my love. always. are you going to tell your brothers? or just your parents?” he questioned as they walked up the dock.

“just my parents. I’ll wait until I get closer to graduation to tell the boys about my new job & graduate school. I still got a season left as a intern so—“ y/n trailed off as simon stopped her.

“hey— you got time. they are going to be happy for you regardless.” simon told his nervous girlfriend as they walked in the door. “go— celebrate. I’ll be here.” pushing her to go to the dinner table & tell her parents. he watched from behind the corner as she told her parents, taking a few pictures as the moment went on.

it’s like he was freezing the special moment for her in time

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

november came and it was only a month away from graduation. y/n's university life was full of having its "lasts" while simon was cruising through the beginning of the season. he would try to come to her senior banquets if he was off, but y/n knew that the thought counts if he couldn't attend. simon was nervous about it because she knew how her brothers were with her, the stories he has listened to about the hughes brothers ignoring their baby sister. he wanted her to feel loved and he engaged in everything he could for her. 

two weeks from graduation; y/n relooked up the graduation date in correlation to her brother's hockey schedules and of course, they didn't line up anymore. she knew that they weren't going to put the effort in to show up, but she still sent a voicemail. 

and of course, she waited every day for a call or text back from at least one of them. she would call her mom every day, asking how her and her dad were doing, as well as asking about the boys. nothing on the boys, but at least her parents agreed to come to her college graduation. 

she felt like shit the week before graduation, sick with stress. simon was truly worried about his girlfriend, and he couldn't even worry about his stress. 

graduation day came and y/n's stress turned into bliss when she was handed her diploma. she couldn't see her group in the crowd, but she could feel the love. simon was sitting with her parents and grandparents in the crowd.

simon sat next to ellen as ellen called frantically all day to get in contact with her sons. again, no answer. "I swear I talk to y/n more than those boys." she told simon and simon tried to laugh it off.

"yeah, y/n knows more about the boys through their insatgram posts than anything else." he tells his future in law as she looks at him, dumbfounded.

"si-- what?" she questions almost angrily. "did y/n never tell you?" he asks as the whole hughes family starts to listen in. "she hasn't actually talked to any of the boys since junior year. they ignore all of her texts and calls, she didn't see them when they would come to detroit......" he continues on and ellen puts the pieces together in her brain. her boys have completely ignored their baby sister, so y/n would always check up on them through her. 

———-

instagram

liked by @/colecaufield, _alexturcotte, elblue06 & 87,672 others

y/n.hughes - thanks umich for the best 4, see you soon for grad school! also go redwings as I will be part time with them over my graduate program! ♥️ thankful for my people and life always🥰 #goblue

tagged @/ universityofmichigan, umichhockey, detroitredwings, simonedvinssonn

posted on december 17

limited comments

umichhockey - congrats from all of us here at yost!! 〽️

↳ y/n.hughes - thank you 💙💛

detroitredwings - ❤️🤍

↳ y/n.hughes - excited for this new step with you!!

elblue06 - congrats my girl!! 🥰🥰

↳ y/n.hughes - I love you mama💖 @/elblue06

simonedvinssonn - pretty grad😇

↳ y/n.hughes - min kärlek♥️♥️ (my love) @/simonedvinssonn

trevorzegras - congrats baby hughes! 🤩

nicohischier - congrats hughesy!!! 🥹🥹

load more comments below

———-

❀☻ 𓆉☼ ✿

three ish months later.......

hey, it’s y/n. I’m calling and I know you wouldn’t have answered me— but I’m engaged! I just called to tell you and jack because I already sent a voicemail to q. I love you both & I hope that you can call me or facetime me soon. but if not— I’ll see you when I see you. or if I even see you. bye, lu lu. 

another phone call was unanswered and sent to voicemail by her siblings. all she wanted was for them to answer or even just acknowledge their existence. she didn't know why she had been exiled, nothing on simon's & hers relationship was out, she was still at umich -- nothing was adding up. but all three of her older brothers were ghosting her. she felt like they were slipping away from her, but this time -- they truly were.

being engaged and working for the same team as your fiancee was tough for y/n. papers were to be signed, and contracts were to be renegotiated, but everything worked out in simon's and y/n's favor. the rest of the year went smoothly, and playoffs came quick enough. the devils were in and the canucks as well as the redwings were out of the playoffs. meaning the whole hughes family went to new jersey to see jack and luke play. y/n told simon that he could come, and ellen encouraged it. so, the future edvinssons with the hughes parents went to new jersey for the first round.

———-

the airport was awkward as they met quinn there, and then waited for jack and luke to pick all of them up. quinn had grown up significantly since the last time that y/n had seen him in person. his beard was grown out, and he grew into the levelheaded defensive player that the canucks needed and wanted as a captain. his face tensed when he saw his little sister with his family, and a tall blonde man. he had no idea why his mother had that face on. 

"hey, how was the flight?" quinn asked his family as he dropped his stuff next to ellen's, engulfing her into a hug. a hug which she reciprocated but then as she let go, she grabbed her eldest son by ear, tugging him to his little sister. y/n and simon stifled a laugh as ellen dragged him to them.

"quintin jerome hughes! I am livid at you and your brothers! ignoring your sister for THAT LONG?!? unacceptable, you are not children anymore." she said as she dropped him off right in front of the couple.

quinn was facing downwards, meaning his eye level was at his little sister's hands, meaning he saw that ROCK on her finger. his head whipped up so fast it almost gave him whiplash. eye to eye, quinn got a good look at his baby sister who was not a baby anymore. she was beautiful, and he had no idea how much time passed until he saw that rock on her finger. "you're engaged?" he questioned her lightly, almost out of breath because he couldn't BELIEVE that his BABY sister was engaged, let alone in a relationship.

"yeah, if you would pick up your damn phone you would have gotten MULTIPLE things from me over the past two years, quintin." she spat back. he was shocked at her anger, but not fully surprised by it. he looked over to her left to see him. the man who stole his little sister's heart, simon edvinsson. he knew who he was as they were both defensemen, as well as luke. they were always in the articles together. 

"you're marrying a hockey player, y/n? that's pretty low of you." quinn told her as he watched her face drop.

"unlike you quinn, he actually has time and cares for me. he has ALWAYS been there, unlike some hockey players I know." she tells her older brother, and she laughs at the end. "oh speak of the devil and they shall appear. simon, meet my other two asshole brothers, luke and jack." she pats his shoulder as quinn turns around to see his other brothers.

"hey what's up -- who's the guy y/n?" jack questions as ellen starts to walk over to her other two sons.

"you two are in serious trouble. how could you ghost y/n like this? for this long? unacceptable." ellen says grabbing them both by their ears for a moment and then letting them go.

"boys, meet simon, y/n's fiancé. y/n, go order an uber for you and simon, please." jim asks them and they nod.

"c'mon babe." she says lightly, grabbing their stuff and heading to the uber terminal.

"they aren’t mad, are they?" simon asks, holding her hand. "not at you my love, but a hughes family talk will be done and hopefully my dumbass brothers will realize what they have done wrong." she tells her fiancé.

———-

a day later and its game day. y/n and simon waited until the game to see everyone (so aka the boys could get their shit together). ellen texted y/n that the boys would need to explain it to her. so, like any good sibling, she met them before the game. bright and early at 8am so they could have a good talk. she met them by a coffee shop near the rink, just a simple brunch spot where it should be fine to talk. or so she thought.

all three boys were sitting at a table when she walked in. she was wearing a monochrome black and red outfit, her brunette hair in curls. she had developed a nice look since they last saw her in person. she was glowing, and looked so much like their mom. she smiled softly at them as she sat down.

“did you order yet?” she asked them politely as they all had coffees in front of them.

“no but we did get coffee, I got you a vanilla latte.” luke told his twin sister as he scooted it next to her.

“thanks luke.” she thanked him.

the waitress came over and took their orders, and then it was silent again. jack cleared his throat and quinn took a drink of his coffee. y/n kept looking down at her rings, fiddling with them. it was awkward, all of the hughes siblings were in a way — but especially now.

“you want to start?” quinn asked his younger sister as she looked up.

“yeah. what the fuck.” she stated bluntly as she took a sip of her iced latte. “how, why, when. I want to know everything. I have done everything right. I have no idea what I have done wrong. do you even know how you made me feel? all of you? I have always felt like the outcasted sibling and you all have made it worse over this period of let’s ignore y/n time.” she ranted as she watched all of their faces turn.

“look y/n with everything going on—“ quinn started as y/n bluntly cut him off. “quintin do not fuck with me. I work for an organization in the league and I’m engaged to a player. I know how your schedules work, I keep up with both of your teams on top of the redwings’, and simon still makes time for me. so, do not bullshit me if you guys say “I’ve had no time” or “we didn’t want to bother you.” she told them straight as their food came.

the tension was thick between the four of them. y/n couldn’t even eat, she just stared and drank her coffee.

“we thought you needed space okay? we thought you wanted to be your own person and we are sorry. we made a promise to each other to all back off and not be the overbearing brothers that we were for the past 20 years. I regret it I do because look at you now. graduated, big girl job, engaged?! I regret missing these milestones of your life y/n.” jack says sincerely which made her choke up.

“I’m sorry too y/n, as a twin I have been horrible. I broke our promise of not pushing you away. I wanted to let you have your umich experience on your own for the past two years but I would do anything to go back and tell myself how stupid our idea was to give you space. I love you, I love you sis. I am happy that you got to do what you have always wanted career wise — and honestly, even relationship wise. I haven’t fully met him, but my friends in the league say he is a pretty good guy.” luke rants heartfully as he grabs y/n’s hand.

at this point y/n is looking at a with tears in her eyes. she has always been closest to quinn. seeing his baby sister look at him like she used to when they were toddlers makes his heart ache. how could he be so stupid, how could all of them be so stupid.

“you— you slipped though our fingers, y/n. and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for graduation, I’m sorry I wasn’t there to buy your first legal drink like I said, I’m sorry for not answering your calls, I’m sorry that I didn’t try harder. you’ve grown up without us for the past two years and I fucking regret it all. I missed hearing your voice and seeing you at games or in our gear. I’m guilty for pushing you away but I’m not guilty about it if that means you got to get your dream job and dream job because we weren’t standing in your light anymore. I love you. we have missed having our little dancing queen in our life, sis. will you take us back?” quinn stutters out and y/n is full on crying in her pancakes.

“I love you boys. I hated that you left — simon hated that you left. but if that means I would get you back again then I would let you do it to me all over again. you are my brothers and I would nev—never not want you in my life. I am still mad but I have worked past it. I love you three to death. luke, jack — lets get you playoff ready, yeah? ice cream?” y/n tells them as they both smile.

quinn is looking at the two boys and their eyes are lit up like christmas. the boys get up and hug their sister tightly and quinn goes to pay the bill. luke and jack lead the way to the ice cream shop down the way, and quinn & y/n follow.

“so, you really love him yeah?” he lightly hits y/n’s shoulder as she blushes.

“yeah I do quinny, he means everything to me.” she mumbles softly as quinn wraps his arm around her shoulder.

“as long as he makes you happy, we approve — but sis; you do know he will still have to pass the hughes brother tests right?” quinn jokes to her as they both laugh.

“simon is up for it if you guys are, but my man is a 6’6 goon so be careful.” she jokes as they meet them at the ice cream shop.

“morning ice cream before playoffs, just like old times when you’d drag us in michigan.” jack tells his younger sister as they make their way to the counter.

“good habits die hard, jacky. time may have slipped but I’m still the same.” she tells him as she orders a mint chocolate chip cone with extra rainbow sprinkles, just like she did as a kid.

———-

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y/n.hughes - can finally post these♥️ my secret is out! #engaged💍

tagged - @/ simonedvinssonn

location - hughes lake house

posted april 17

load comments down below

elblue06 - finally got those back!!

↳ y/n.hughes - the perfect planner :) @/elblue06

lhughes_06 - congrats sis🤑

↳ y/n.hughes - love you moose 💖 @/lhughes_06

simonedvinssonn - jag kan inte vänta med att få spendera för alltid med dig min älskade♥️ (I can’t wait to spend forever with you my love)

↳ y/n.hughes - forever by the beach boys baby🤍 @/simonedvinssonn

jackhughes - still need the summer tests but he is approved 🫡

↳ _quinnhughes - our baby sister isn’t a baby anymore 😭 @/jackhughes

trevorzegras - WEDDING BELLSSSS ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

colecaufield - CONGRATS SIS

umichhockey - team 101 reunion???

load more comments down below

———-

since the hughes sibling talk, the hughes family & simon watched every single devils playoff game together, as a family. the devils went all the way to the stanley cup finals, everyone was ecstatic for it as luke & jack were not having record breaking seasons. y/n was happy to be there in person to see her brothers shine. she missed it. but she was even happier to see her brothers get along with her fiancé, especially quinn. simon and quinn bonded fast as they watched all of the games, side by side.

two years ago, if she told herself that her brothers would be back in her life and being on good terms with her fiancé, enough to even be civil while watching the cup together - she would have laughed. now…. she can’t imagine it any different. time slipped by and the hughes siblings grew apart, but not even time can break the bond of the siblings. it just grew stronger.

if y/n knew that this would be the outcome of growing apart from her siblings — she’d let it all happen again; in a heartbeat.

[shy4turcs]

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With that, yall can go ahead and ask me whatever or even just send me your thoughts on players, ill be answering questions and other asks all week (June 5th - 11th)

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[nicohischierz]

@1-800-iluvhockey and i have just come up with two amazing fic ideas 🤭🤭

[matthewkniesys]

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#also my boyfriend now is the sweetest guy so i'm not saying all hockey players aren't good but it's just that we build them up in our heads

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Brendan Brisson's Best Friend- Thomas Bordeleau

Summary: Y/n and Thomas are dating but the boys don't know and you go to the carnival with them.

A/n: Hey guys! Ahhh, so I'm so excited for this one! This is my first Thomas fic so... Feedback good or bad is always welcome here so please tell me what you think. It might be a bit sad. Please tell me if you want a part two. Special thanks to Abbs ( @1-800-iluvhockey )for all the help! <33 I hope you guys enjoy it :)

I want to clarify incase anyone's confused this is a Thomas Bordeleau x reader fic but Brendan is a main character in it.

Here's part 2

Here's part 3

You're standing in front of the full length mirror in your room looking over what is probably the tenth outfit you had tried on.  You were thinking about how you wanted to try on one more outfit, when you heard your boyfriend of a month and a half mutter something quietly to himself. "What" you ask Thomas,a little bit annoyed that he interrupted your train of thought. "It's just that you're taking a really,really long time to decide on what to wear" he tells you " I think you look good no matter what you wear".  You thank him and ultimately decide to wear a pair of ripped jeans and a cropped black top since it's relatively warm. "Babe it's gonna be 7 at night by the time we get to the carnival ,you sure you won't be cold or do you just want an excuse to steal another one of my hoodies?" Thomas questions with a smirk. "I would never!" you respond knowing fully that, that's your plan. You leave the room to go and fix your hair.

"C'mon y/n we should get going or we are going to be late picking up Briss"  your boyfriend yells at you from the bottom of the stairs 15 minutes later. " I'm coming" you yell back. 

It's funny when you think about it because without Brendan you probably would never have met Thomas. You and Brendan had been best friends since forever and then when he introduced you to Thom there was just an instant connection and hey,now the two of you are dating! The only catch is that Brendan or any of the Umich guys don't know yet. It's not that you didn't want to tell Brendan you were just nervous about his reaction. He was like a brother to you and you were worried that this would cause problems between him and Thomas.

You finished your makeup and rushed down the stairs. You met Thomas at the bottom and stopped on the last stair. "What's wrong" you ask wondering why he's just standing there staring at you. He eventually pulls it together “ You look absolutely beautiful” he tells you as he picks you up and spins you around. 

The two of you get into the car and Thomas puts the key in the ignition and turns the car on. He places his hand on your thighs and starts driving. The car ride to Brendan's is silent but it's a comfortable silence. 

When you get there the both of you get out and knock on Briss's door. He yells to come in. When you get inside Thomas goes to look for Brendan. All of a sudden you hear Thomas yelling at Brendan but he didn't sound mad so you went to go find them. When you got closer you could hear what Thomas was saying " Brendan I texted you 30 minutes ago and you told me you were ready. I swear you are even worse than y/n". "Sorry I'm- wait what? You were at y/n/n's, Why? Is she here? I thought I was picking her up" rambles Brendan, clearly hurt. Oh shit you forgot Brendan was picking you up. Oh well. "Umm" Thomas mutters nervously. But you being the person you are ran into the room and came to Thom's rescue. You cut him off before he can say anything stupid "Geez chill out Bren, I just needed help picking an outfit and no offense but Bords has way better sense of style than you". See this is the exact reason you were worried about telling Brendan about you and Thomas. " Hey that's rude" states Brendan. "Hey I don't make the rules" you tell him.

"Okay can we get going?" Questions Thomas "I don't want to be late". " Okay, okay I'm ready to go on I guess" says Brendan. And with that your trio left to go to the carnival. The ride with Brendan was very different from the one with just Thomas. The 3 of you sat there absolutely belting out Taylor Swift. Thomas drove and Brendan sat in the passenger seat while you were stuck in the back.  After what seemed like hours of listening to Brendans horrible singing you guys arrived at the carnival. 

Originally this was supposed to be a date between just you and  Bords but your boyfriend stupidly let it slip that he was going to the carnival  when he was hanging out with “the boys”. Thankfully he didn't include that you were his date but he did tell them he had a date. They were all so invested in finding out who it was but ( to your surprise) Thomas didn't tell them. You thought for sure he would Crack under the pressure. The boys all decide they would come and just be at the carnival "for moral support" as Matty said. So your boyfriend kinda had a problem. You just told him to tell the guys that his date was canceled, which he did, so the guys decided they would just go out together and Brendan wanted to invite you. Hence why you're here right now. 

Currently you, Brendan and Thomas were waiting for the rest of the guys to show up. Matty and Trusc were next. And lastly it was Owen and Kent. 

"So what are we doing first" asks Brendan to no one in particular. "How about bumper cars?" Suggests Owen. "Sure why not" and all the guys agree except for Thomas. "Maybe me and y/n will go play ring toss. There isn't a very long line. We'll meet up with you in about 20 minutes". "Okay I guess so" says Brendan giving you and Thomas a weird look.

Your group parts ways but Brendan still seems super suspicious. You tug on Thomas's hoodie to get his attention. "What babe" he asks. "We have to be more careful around Bren". "I think we're doing a pretty good job already y/n/n". "Did you not see his face back there" you ask Thomas. "No, why?". "He looked like he was ready to murder you" you tell him " I think he has a suspicion something is going on". "Well he's not wrong" Thomas replies. "Thomas" you whine " I don't think you're getting the point". "Y/n chill out. Why do you care so much if he knows?" Thomas questions. "I-I I just don't know okay" you snap "I'm worried about losing Bren and I'm worried about you losing Brendan and I just- I don't know". You are so close to crying and the only thing keeping you together is the fact that you're at a carnival. A freaking carnival. You're not supposed to cry there. 

Thomas takes a deep breath and then says " Baby, I'm so sorry. You're right. If you don't want him to know and you think we need to be more careful we will, I promise".  "I-I think I love you Thomas" you say quickly. "I love you too baby" Thomas replies a little slower pulling you into a soft kiss. 

"What the fuck" says a familiar voice behind you. Brendan. Oh shit. You pull away quickly from Thomas leaving a confused look on your boyfriend's face until he turns around and sees what you're looking at. His face falls and you hear him quietly mutter " fuck". 

Brendan angrily stomps over to the two of you. "What the hell was that? I trusted you guys. Even when my gut was telling me that the 2 of you we're dating I ignored it cause you guys are my best friends. I thought you would at least tell me and that's not even talking about how I told you Thomas, that y/n was off limits. She is no was my best friend and now I don't even know what to think" Brendan yells. 

You couldn't even care that everyone at the carnival heard that. All you care is that you might have lost your best friend since you were 2. "Just don't even try to contact me or I will block you. If I want to hear from you I will text" Brendan whispers walking away, a tear trickling down his cheek. You felt a tear rolling down your own cheek as well. "Wait, who will drive you home?" Thomas yells after Brendan. "Matty and Jacob" he yells back. 

"I guess that's our signal to go" says Matty " but congrats you guys are really cute". "Bye" you whisper, afraid that if you talk too much you'll completely break down.  "See you,congrats" Trusc says. Him and Matty leave you,Owen,Kent and Thomas standing there.

"We should probably go but I just wanted to say that you guys are really cute and I hope you guys are happy" Owen pauses and then continues " I'm sure Brendan will come around, and as cliché as it sounds just give him time". Kent nods his head in agreement and with that it's just you and Thomas left.

"So…" Thomas starts and then trails off when he sees you in tears. He immediately wraps his strong arms around you and says nothing. 

"Thomas... what I said before was true I really do love you but at least for tonight I need to be alone. I'll call you at some point just not today. I'll just catch a cab home. I'll see you later" you tell Thomas,soaking his hoodie with your tears.

"Wait, I'll give you my keys and you can take my car" your boyfriend tells you. "Are you sure?". "Yes 100%" he tells you. In reality he didn't want you taking the cab but also this was his way to ensure he would see you again.

You take the keys and with one final look over your shoulder you walk away from Thomas, tears streaming down your cheeks.

126 notes - Posted May 1, 2022

#4

hey claire 🥰🥰 sending in to request “Wait a minute. Are you jealous?” With our boy Ethan Edwards! 💗✨ thanks Angel!

I hope you like it lovey &lt;3

"Babe" Ethan looks up from his phone when he hears his girlfriend, y/n speak.

"Mhmm" Ethan responds passively.

"I'm going to study now with blanks"

"What now... studying with blanks?" Ethan asks, genuinely confused.

"Yeah remember I told you he was gonna help me with some school work"

"No I don't remember you telling me that but have fun"

"I'll be back in probably 2 or 3 hours" y/n responds, kissing Ethan on the cheek on her way out.

Ethan is a jealous person by nature. And maybe it's not even jealousy maybe it's just that he's super protective. He feels unsettled at the thought of you and nick hanging out one on one. He's not sure why since nick nor you have ever given him any reason to not be trustful.

He pulls out his phone and calls mark.

"Hey Ethan, what's up" says mark when he picks up the phone.

"We are going to the library to spy on y/n and blanks right now"

"Whyyy" mark groans into the phone. "You can't seriously not trust them"

"I trust them, I'm jealous and you know that's just who I am and I can't help it"

"Fine I'll meet you there but for the record this is a stupid idea" says mark knowing he's not gonna win this argument.

When ethan gets there he scans the room for y/n. He sees you and nick cozy in the far corner. In all honesty you and blanks weren't even sitting that close to each other. Ethan is just making a big deal out of nothing.

Once mark gets there, the 2 boys grab a table close enough to spy but not so close they would get caught. They grabbed a few big encyclopedias to peek over the tops so you wouldn't see them.

After a while Ethan realised this was super stupid. Nothing was going on between y/n and nick. He knew that all along but after all he is just a boy.

"This is stupid" whispers mark. All ethan does is shrug his shoulders. The 2 boys continue talking behind the books when all of a sudden ethan feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns around and his jaw drops.

"Y/n uh hi... how's studying?" Stammers ethan.

"Oh it's going super well. I was just wondering why you and Mark are here reading encyclopedias... wait a minute. Are you jealous" y/n can barely contain her laughter. When she can't stand it anymore she bursts out laughing. Ethan can feel his face turning beet red.

"Whats going on" asks blanks as he comes to join your trio.

"Ethan... Ethan is jealous" you gasp out.

Now nick starts laughing. Pretty soon ethan and mark join in and everyone's laughing. Eventually everyone finally calms down.

"God Ethan your such a dork"

142 notes - Posted June 12, 2022

#3

California Makes Me Exhausted- Jamie Drysdale

Summary: Jamie was born in Toronto so he's no stranger to big, busy cities and while Toronto is big, LA is bigger. He's drowning in all of it and most of all he just misses you.

Pairing: Jamie Drysdale x fem!reader

Warnings: sad Jamie and a few swears 

A/n: Alright so I finally wrote a new fic! This fic is my baby so I hope everyone likes it! Feedback and comments are very welcome!

The game of hockey is hard. Just playing hockey is difficult but then you add the fans and the media and the expectations and sometimes it can become to much. At least that's how it feels to Jamie.

Being picked sixth overall isn't something to take lightly. Being picked in the top ten puts insane expectations on you, some of which aren't even attainable. Everyone expect you to be perfect when in truth that's impossible.

Then there is Trevor. The one he is always being compared to. Its not fair when they are two completely different players in two completely different positions. Trevor's a centreman and Jamie's a dman. He'd being lying to you of he told you it wasn't hard constantly being in his shadow. For the most part Jamie didn't mind all the attention being on Trevor, but once in awhile it's nice for them to be purely focusing on you. Even on the night he scored his first goal, Trevor did too.

But perhaps the hardest thing for Jamie when he is in LA is that he doesn't get to see his girlfriend, y/n.

So when the season ends, Jamie can't say he's exactly happy that it's over but he's definitely ready for a break. A break where he completely falls off the face of the earth for a few months.

Packing up the locker room is always a somber event. Saying goodbye to all your friends, some of whom you may never play with again, knowing you won't be back until next season and the overall knowledge that you didn't win the cup. Even for a team like the ducks, who never came into this season with the expectations of winning, it still stings.

Jamie goes through media, almost half consciously. He's there giving half hearted comments, but his mind is elsewhere. The flight he has booked back to Toronto, all the friends he's gonna see when he gets back, and you, are all floating through his mind, more important than whatever stupid questions the reporters are asking.

When media finally finished Jamie said his goodbyes and got ready to leave. Troy stopped him in his path.

“James where are you off to in such a hurry?’

“I’ve got a flight back home to catch in a few hours.” He responds.

“Eager to get back home?”

“Yeah, haven’t seen my girl since Christmas when she came out to see a few games.”

“Well have fun but listen, take care of yourself this offseason, eh? I've seen how tired you've looked these last few months Jame, and while its not effecting you on ice, your mental health is is just as important. I don't know what's up, but I'm here if you need me. Take it easy, bud.”

“Thanks dude. You take care of yourself as well.”

“You’ve got my number right? Call if you ever need anything.” Jamie nods his head, even though he knows he won’t call Troy. He’s to stubborn to ever admit needing help. 

Jamie rushes to get away. Even though he appreciates Troy's concern he doesn't want to be held up in anymore of those conversations. The truth is he had been feeling drained for a long time now. It was a new feeling for Jamie. He was used to being able to make it through the season without feeling to tired but it seemed that this season no matter how much he slept he couldn't feel rested.

He gets in his car and puts the keys in. He drives to the airport probably faster that he should be but Jamie is ready to leave California behind. He understands big cities but California is different. Everything moves so fast. It's easy to get left behind. California is definitely not a hockey state but Jamie still feels like he's drowning in it just because it's California. 

He gets to the airport and rushes through security as fast as possible. He collapses on one of the hard, cold, plastic chairs and takes a deep breath.

Some time later, he hears a women’s voice come on over the PR system.

“Flight number 62 to Toronto, Ontario has been delayed at least 2 hours.” Jamie groans. All he wants to do is get home, see his family and his girlfriend. He wants to ask you about your day in person, he wants to hug you and kiss you and cuddle you, he wants to do everything he misses out on while he’s in California playing hockey.

Jamie closes his eyes and tries to fall asleep. He eventually does though its the same kind of sleep he’s been having since the last time he saw you. Since December, when you came out to Anaheim, He truly hasn’t had a good night sleep since then. 

He wakes for the 3rd time in 20 minutes to hear his phone going off. He sees 2 missed calls and a voicemail from y/n waiting for him. He knows that today you had a big finals exam but you 2 hadn’t talked in a few days. Shit, Jamie thinks realizing he forgot to text you good luck this morning.

He opens the voicemail,

“Hey babe, um I just wanted to let you know that I’m done taking my exam and I think it went pretty well! I hope you’re having a good day. Can’t wait to see you tonight! Love you.” Jamie listened to the voicemail 2 more times. He misses you so, so much. You were his everything. His best friend since he was a little kid, his now girlfriend for the last 3 and a half years. You meant the world to him and he would do anything for you. 

Jamie sits there, on that cold, hard, plastic chair with tears threatening to roll down his cheeks. He misses you, he just wants to be around you. He picks up his phone and selects your number at the top of his contacts.

See the full post

162 notes - Posted August 15, 2022

#2

See the full post

321 notes - Posted June 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I'm super curious, do yall play or used to play any sports???

15,614 notes - Posted June 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[hugheshugs]

cinnamon and spice | q. hughes + b. boeser

this one was a request !! i apologize that it took months to get this done but i hope u like it :))

prompts: #18 — "i don't want to break your heart." // #36 — "i'm going to puke on your jersey." // #96 — "how did you find out?" // #100 — "why didn't you tell me?"

summary: you and quinn used to hook up but he ghosts you and you find out you're pregnant. your best friend brock is there to help you until you see quinn again.

pairing: bestfriend!brock x pregnant!reader, babydaddy!quinn x pregnant!reader

word count: 5k

warnings: vomiting, pregnancy things, mentions of alcohol, anxiety.

note: idk how i feel abt this one ahh, its very different from my other fics i think. i also dont think i'll be writing another pregnancy fic bc it took me way too long to write this one !! that being said, i hope u guys enjoy this

taglist: @heatabovejakey @boeswhore @calemakarjuice @pandas-daisy @rainysuitcaseprunegiant @1-800-iluvhockey @trevvorzegras @bbrissonn @drei-mrssvechii @idfan21 @thescooby-gang @owenpowersglasses @owenpowerstapejob @this-is-ally-and-im-confused @inspiredby-ratz-blog* // join my taglist here :)

delivered.

you and quinn were never close. fuck buddies, yes, but you weren't best friends. you guys were sort of always stuck between 'we shouldn't be friends' and 'we shouldn't catch feelings.' it was weird so you both never got emotionally attached to each other.

sure you guys talked, — he texted you before he came to fuck you but that was it.

you guys only used each other for sex. it wasn't until you realized you only let yourself give in to quinn that you figured you may be catching feelings.

a month later, quinn hasn't texted you back. you spent countless days and nights wondering what went wrong, if you did something to make him leave, but you simply couldn't come up with anything. it hurt but you just think that maybe he found someone else to sleep with.

weeks pass by and you start feeling a bit worried. you missed your period and thought it might just be late but it never came. tiredness, nausea, things that were never a problem for you before have been wreaking havoc in your daily life and you're 99% sure you know why.

bundling up, you muster the strength to go out and grab a pregnancy test. you hope you don't feel nauseous on the way there because you definitely aren't going to ask anyone to get it for you.

luckily, the short journey isn't too much of a hassle and you make it there and back home safely. you were smart enough to drink a ton of water before leaving so when you get home, you don't have to wait to take the test.

you feel your heart beating in your head as you shrug your jacket off and shakily walk over to your bathroom, test in your hands. you feel like you already know what the answer is and there's only one person that could be the father. you aren't sure if you're more worried about the baby or telling quinn you're bearing his child.

positive.

your eyes widen, heart leaping in your chest as you throw the test across the room.

"what the fuck?" you ask yourself, running a hand through your hair.

quinn was always serious about protection, which is why you can't think of a single time where maybe you guys somehow just forgot. the condom must have broken or had a hole in it and he just never noticed, but what the fuck.

with a drum beating against your ribcage, you grab your purse and walk out the door with only one thing on your mind.

--

"brock!"

you run towards him, engulfing him in a massive hug the second you reach him. almost as if an emotional wave washes over you, you begin crying into his neck.

"hey, what's wrong?" brock asks in concern, eyebrows furrowing as he holds your shaking body in his arms.

he wasn't expecting to see you, and definitely not right after practice. he was on his way home just before you saw him and he's confused as hell.

you shake your head, unable to answer him at the moment. all you want right now is the support of your best friend. you don't know how you're going to handle everything by yourself and it's too much for you to take in.

"breathe for me, c'mon. take deep breaths, you gotta chill out," he tries soothing you, a hand rubbing your back comfortingly.

it helps. after a couple minutes of him reassuring you quietly in your ear, your sobs turn into sniffles and you pull away from his grasp. with a pounding head, you can't bare to look him in the eyes. what's he going to think of you? how's he going to feel about you sleeping with one of his closest friends?

"what's wrong? you can't just come to me crying and expect me to not want answers," he tells you, lifting your head up with his palms and wiping your tears.

"i—" your voice sounds scratchy and gross, making you close your eyes and take a deep breath before speaking. "can we go to your place please? i'll explain there, i promise."

brock's about to refuse, not about taking you to his place but about you telling him once you get there. he's dying to know what's got you so worked up but he sees the look on your face and sighs, unable to say no.

"alright, let's go."

"yay," you whisper, which makes him chuckle.

he rests his hand on the small of your back as he leads you to his car. looking out the doors of the arena, he sees the pouring rain and takes a double take when he looks at you again.

"how did you get here?"

"i ran."

"in the rain?" he asks in disbelief.

"no, it wasn't raining when i got here. guess i got lucky," you shrug and he rolls his eyes, stopping in his tracks to set his bag down.

he pulls out a hoodie and hands it to you. "you're not getting sick on my watch, little missy."

"can i keep it?" you ask excitedly.

brock bites the inside of his cheek when he sees the grin on your face, the redness of your eyes making it a sore sight.

"yeah, why not?"

--

you need to tell someone. it would be a bad idea not to, no? you can't keep it in for too long, especially when you know you're going to need some help. quinn can't be kept in the dark either, but the thought of telling him about your pregnancy makes bile rise to your throat immediately, so you try to push that thought away as best as you can.

taking a seat on brocks couch, the colour drains from your face when coolie comes to your side and begins sniffing your stomach. you peak over at brock to see him looking through his pantries in the kitchen so you smile and pet the dog beside you.

"i know you know," you whisper. "but you can't tell anyone, okay?"

coolie pauses his sniffing to stare at you and you simply laugh, although your stomach beings feeling even worse. guess you couldn't push away that thought for too long.

brock finally walks over with your favourite snack which only makes you want to gag. milo starts barking loudly from his seat on the ground and you clutch your ears, suddenly feeling sensitive to the sound.

"milo, stop that!"

you shouldn't be feeling as anxious as you are. it's probably bad for the baby but you can't help it. you close your eyes and try taking deep breaths but you can't, forcing you to open your eyes and look at brock.

"i'm going to puke."

his eyes widen but before he can say anything, you run past him. he follows swiftly behind you and brings a fist to his mouth in disgust when he sees you throwing up into his toilet.

he fights back his hesitations when hot tears escape your eyes and you begin coughing as saliva drips out of your mouth. bending down to take a seat, he scrunches his nose at the horrid smell but holds your hair back for you as you continue emptying your stomach.

after a couple minutes, you don't feel anything coming up and you take heavy breaths, leaning back into brock's chest. he uses his hands to brush away the stray hairs that are sticking onto your damp forehead, once again pushing away every thought of disgust that flows through his mind.

"y/n, you need to tell me what's wrong."

"i want peanut butter," you mumble. you start to feel tired, not having eaten much throughout the day and just puking it all out. you have nothing in your system. "with pickles. pickles 'n peanut butter."

brock furrows his eyebrows. "you're a fucking weirdo. c'mon, let's get you cleaned up."

he helps you stand up and thankfully you have enough energy to walk on your own and brush your teeth (using a spare toothbrush of course, not brock's). he lets you do your thing while he goes back to his kitchen to find you pickles and peanut butter.

when you walk out and meet him, you see a jar of pickles set out for you with peanut butter. you grin, taking a seat and digging in. brock stands on the other side of the island and grimaces at the sight.

"mmm, brock, this is so good! you wanna try?"

"no! no, i'm good. i'm perfectly fine standing right over here," he says quickly, watching as milo comes over to sit beside you. something feels weird to him. he senses a change in his pups, noticing that they seem a bit more.. protective of you. they had even been sitting by the bathroom while you were in there puking your guts out.

"you good? you look like you're stressed," you ask with your mouth full.

"why were you crying? you came to find me at the arena and you were crying. you said you were going to tell me what's wrong but you haven't," he gets straight to the point and your heart drops.

"uhm, well.." you swallow the food in your mouth, thinking about how to tell him. "please don't be mad."

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"i'm pregnant."

"you're what?" his eyes bulge and he dashes around the counter. "did i hear you correctly? did you just say you're pregnant?"

"yes! yes, i am but please don't be mad and please don't tell anyone, brock, please."

"i won't tell anyone, i just," he lets out a deep breath, running a hand through his hair as he sits beside you. "who's the father?"

you give him a sheepish look. "pinky promise you won't be mad?"

he rolls his eyes and gives you his pinky. you lock yours with his and look directly at him.

"quinn."

"hughes?"

"who else?"

"i'm gonna kill him."

your eyes widen as brock stands up from his seat, making you rush over to stop him. you grab his arms and hold him in place, making him glare at you expectantly.

"it wasn't his fault—"

"wasn't his fault? y/n, he's been hooking up with girls and you're over here pregnant with his kid! don't fucking defend h— wait, how the fuck did this even happen?"

"listen, i'll tell you everything but can we please sit down and talk it over. i really need your help, that's why i came to find you."

he gives you a reluctant nod and you drag him over to his couch, his eyes softening as he finds you unconsciously resting a hand on your stomach. you both sit down and you tell him everything, from the minute you and quinn decided to be fuck buddies up until now. surprisingly, you aren't in tears by the end, you're just scared and brock can see it. he's so incredibly happy for you but he knows you're young and don't know what to do, which breaks his heart.

"i'm sorry i hid everything from you and i'm sorry i came to you with all this. i just found out about this today," you tell him, gesturing to your stomach. "you were the first person i wanted to tell."

brock gives you a small smile. "i appreciate that. you have no idea how happy i am for you but it's okay to be afraid, you know? i can see that you're unsure of everything but i'm here for you, i promise."

you don't waste a moment pulling him into a hug and he rubs your back soothingly, hoping to ease your tensions.

"i want you to stay with me."

your eyebrows crease at his words and you try pulling out of his grasp but he doesn't let go.

"i need to know you and your baby are safe at all times. please, i don't want you living alone. at least until you tell him," he explains.

"i don't want to be a burden—"

"you're not, you'll never be. you need to understand that i really don't think it's a good idea for you to be pregnant and alone, all i want to do is help you. please."

you nod in the crease of his neck, pulling him closer. "okay. i'll stay."

--

you're 16 weeks pregnant now. your bump is starting to show but it's easily hidden by the endless amount of brock's clothes you've stolen. you've been staying with him like you said you would and it hasn't been the best time but he couldn't be any more understanding.

tonight, you guys are going to a small get together at bo's house. you decided you've waited way too long and you can't keep quinn in the dark anymore so you plan on telling him tonight. he deserves to be given the opportunity to support you and his child if he wants, and you won't blame him if he doesn't want to but he needs to know it's an option.

you've seen him and his girlfriend on social media and to say you're a bit intimidated would be an understatement. she's a model but she doesn't seem the nicest and things look like they're getting pretty serious between the two. at least, that's what brock's been saying, which only makes you feel worse about quinn not knowing.

you get ready and pull on a pair of sweats and one of brock's hoodies. making your way out of your temporary bedroom, brock laughs when he sees you.

"you're really gonna wear my clothes?"

"yeah, is there a problem? i can take it off if you want me to."

"no, it's not a problem. i was just thinking that people might think we're together or something."

you blink slowly in thought, realizing he's right. no one even knows you're living with him, what'll they think when you show up in his clothes?

"i'll just pretend i bought a really big hoodie. no big deal," you shrug. "i doubt they remember this is yours, right?"

"we'll have to wait and find out," he says breathily before opening the front door.

the car ride is silent, other than the soft radio hum in the background and you tapping your foot anxiously as you think about talking to quinn. you don't know how he'll react and you're scared he's going to freak out or get mad at you for some reason.

"you okay?" brock asks, sensing your distress.

"just thinking about quinn.."

"you still like him?"

"mhm," your eyes trail off as you look out the window. "but he's in this perfect relationship and here i am about to screw it up."

"don't say that. it takes two to make a damn kid, you're not screwing anything up. if anything, he screwed it up himself. and if he says or does anything to hurt you, i will personally beat his ass," brock tells you, making you smile at his overprotectiveness.

"i don't know if i want you to beat up my baby daddy," you joke.

"he'll get it if he deserves it," he says as he parks outside bo's.

he sees you eyeing the house carefully and notices your hand shaking a bit. he grabs it softly with one hand and holds your face with the other, forcing you to look at him.

"hey, everything's going to be okay. you know quinn, he's a good guy. it might be a shock to him at first but he'll get over it.. and if he doesn't, you have a whole group of guys in there who'll happily play uncle for your little one. we got your back."

he wipes a stray tear that fell from your eye, your heart melting at his words. you know he's right. no matter how this goes, you have other friends who'll support you no matter what. you nod your head and give him a small smile, he sends you a grin in return. you both make your way out of the car and walk over to the front door where holly greets you instantly.

"hi guys! long time no see, how are you?" she asks happily, pulling brock in for a hug.

"i'm great, you?" he wraps his arms around her and gives you a look, hinting at your stomach.

your eyes widen as you realize she'll feel your belly when she hugs you so when she comes over, you give her an awkward side hug instead. thankfully, she doesn't seem to notice anything and ushers you both into the house.

in the living room, you see a couple of brock's teammates (who are also your friends) and their significant others hanging out. noticing that most of them are drinking, you pray that they don't give you a drink as well, thinking about how you're going to convince them that the girl who never used to pass up a free drink doesn't drink anymore.

conor sees you and jumps up from his seat, making you grab brock's arm. you weren't planning on telling anyone other than quinn about your pregnancy but if people keep trying to hug you it's not going to stay a secret for too long.

"hey, y/n/n! how are ya?" conor asks, standing in front of you. his eyes flicker down to your hold on brock but he doesn't question it.

"i'm good, how are you?"

"i'm great. missed my friend, that's for sure."

you look at him guiltily. "sorry.. i've just been a bit busy."

"no worries. glad you're here now though. c'mon, let's get you a drink."

you hadn't realized the group had quieted down at yours and brock's arrival. each of them waited to greet you but they'd been listening on your conversation and as soon as conor mentioned the drink, it felt like a pin dropped because of the way you remain quiet.

"uhm, i can't.." you squeeze brock's hand, silently pleading for help.

"since when does y/f/n not drink? that's news to me," elias says, making brock chuckle.

"she's my designated driver for tonight. i'm tryna get drunk so she's gonna drive me home, no biggie," brock saves your ass. you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding when everyone drops the case and goes back to their conversations.

"thanks," you whisper as conor retreats.

"you're welcome. now where's quinner.." brock trails off, looking around as you both take a seat on the huge sofa.

"he's probably just not here yet—"

you stand corrected as quinn walks in the room with a girl on his arm. you feel like the whole world stopped. everything around you blurs with him as your main focus and your heart leaps when his eyes meet yours.

you swallow the growing lump in your throat and try forgetting about the feelings you have for him, his girlfriend being an indicator that whatever you once had is over. butterflies consume you, your mind almost mistaking the feeling for nausea as he and the girl take a seat beside you.

you give him a smile but your expression changes when you look down and notice he's wearing a jersey.

you furrow your eyebrows. "what are you wearing?"

"we were running late so i grabbed the first thing i saw," he chuckles, running a hand through his hair. "it's nice to see you."

it's almost pathetic how that simple sentence brings an unwelcomed warmth to your face. "it's nice to see you too. how've you been?"

"good.. great, actually. there's someone i want you to meet," he tells you, looking to his side. he taps the girl on her shoulder and she turns to look at you.

"candice, this is y/n. y/n, this is my girlfriend, candice."

"hi," you wave lightly. "nice to meet you."

she chews her gum aggressively and looks you up and down before meeting your eyes and shooting you a fake grin. "yeah. nice to meet you too."

no words are spoken between you and her after that, for she gives her attention back to holly so they can resume the conversation they were having before quinn interrupted.

"she's a gem.." you say sarcastically.

quinn chuckles. "she doesn't really like meeting new people. anyway, how are you?"

you feel a heavy weight on your shoulders, fidgeting with the hem of brock's hoodie as quinn sits tight for an answer. your throat runs dry and your mind is jumbled with too many thoughts. before you can think of the right thing to say, one stupid sentence comes out of your mouth.

"i'm going to puke on your jersey."

his eyes widen. "what? are you oka—"

he doesn't get an answer because you quickly stand up and walk away, trying your best to hold in your sickness before it spills onto the ground. you don't want to cause a scene by running so you keep a steady pace, tugging conor with you on your way to the washroom.

"woah, you good?" he asks as you push the door open.

you shake your head, bile pooling in your mouth as you push him in and shut the door. taking a seat in front of the toilet, it doesn't take a minute before you're spilling into the bowl. conor gags but reaches over to hold your hair.

you both stay in there for a while and quinn starts to worry. if he wants to be honest with himself, he'd admit that he only came here because he wanted to see you — but not for any reason other than that he felt bad about ghosting you.

he looks over to brock who'd moved to sit beside him. "you think she's okay?"

"huh?" brock asks confusedly.

"y/n, she wasn't feeling well. it's been a while since she left.."

"conor's with her, she'll be fine."

that doesn't help quinn one bit. he hesitates, wondering if maybe the pair are actually hooking up in the washroom, but the sick look on your face flashes in his mind and that thought disappears in an instant.

he stands up and makes his way to the washroom which luckily isn't too far. he enters the hallway and sees the door open, to his relief. taking small steps, he halts as he hears shushed voices.

"what do you mean you're pregnant?!"

"i'm fucking telling you i'm pregnant, conor! how do you think i got pregnant, do you need me to explain conception to you?"

quinn's mouth parts and he raises an eyebrow. you're pregnant? it doesn't click in his mind for even a split second that he might be the father. yeah, he remembers that you both used to hookup but he figures that you would have already told him if he was.

he hears some shuffling and bolts into the laundry room beside him, not wanting to get caught. that definitely wasn't something he was supposed to hear and he doesn't want to upset you.

"well, who's the father?"

he's able to see you and conor standing in the hallway through the crack of the open door he hides behind. he watches as you hesitate and huff in frustration.

"quinn."

"hughes?"

"no," you deadpan, waiting a moment. "yes, quinn hughes! quintin jerome hughes, what is up with men and thinking i didn't fuck quinn hughes? yes, i fucked quinn hughes and now i'm 4 months pregnant with his child, is that. what. you wanted. to hear. conor?"

quinn's face pales as he continues listening to you two bicker like children. it all goes in one ear and out the other as he tries to stomach the fact that he's going to be a father at 22 years old. and four months. you hid your pregnancy from him for four months. those are four months he could have cared for you and his child. he doesn't know how to feel. he shouldn't be mad because after all, he's the one who put you in this situation, but he had the right to know, didn't he?

you both walk away and quinn slowly exits the laundry room, tugging at his hair in frustration and confusion. he feels angry and he doesn't know what to do.

sighing, he makes his way back to the living room and watches as you stand in the kitchen with some of the girls.

it all happens in a spur of the moment.

he walks over to you as quick as he can, grabs your hand and tugs you upstairs to one of the guest rooms, locking the door behind him.

"quinn, you okay?"

"why didn't you tell me?"

his words send a shock to your gut but you think that maybe he's talking about something else. maybe he doesn't actually know and you might just out yourself by saying the wrong thing.

"what do you mean—"

"our baby, y/n. why the fuck didn't you tell me?"

you blink at him, anger raging through your veins in an instant. he sees the change on your face but it doesn't phase him one bit, seeing as he's also engraged at the moment.

"you fucking ghosted me, quinn! do you know how long i've been thinking about telling you? how guilty i've felt about not telling you? i was planning on doing it today but you found out, how the fuck did you find out?"

"well, it wasn't too hard when you were practically shouting it to the world in the hallway downstairs!"

"god, quinn don't fucking yell at me," you grit through your teeth, glaring at him. "it wasn't easy, these past four months have been hell. i dont wanna argue, can we please just talk this out?"

"i don't want to talk, y/n. you hid this from me for so fucking long and now i'm in a committed relationship with someone else! maybe i would have tried to stay with you if i'd known we were having a goddamn family together—"

"i don't want you to be with me because of a mistake—"

"our baby is not a mistake!"

"quinn! we're not even 25 yet, yes, this baby is a mistake. it's not wrong to admit that, you know? just because it's a mistake that doesn't mean i care about it any less!"

both your chests heave as you finish screaming at each other. quinn closes his eyes and tries grounding himself as you start to feel bad about screaming at him. the room quiets down and you bite your lip, heart pounding as you realize you yelled at the man you love instead of having an important conversation about everything.

"listen, i'm sorry. you're probably under a lot of stress and i shouldn't have lashed out on you," quinn apologizes.

your heart grows in size. quinn could mess up in the worst ways possible and you'd go back to him every time. "it's okay, i shouldn't have yelled either. i wanted to have a real conversation but here we are.."

there's an elephant in the room that you both know needs to be addressed but neither of you know how to bring it up. you sigh, taking a seat on the bed and looking up at him. he walks over and takes the seat in beside you as you lean your back on the bedframe.

"i should have told you—"

"no, it's not a big deal, really.. are you showing?"

you give him a small smile. "a little, yeah. the baby's the size of an avocado."

"can i.. um," he hesitates. you know exactly what he wants but you want to hear him say it.

"can i see it? the baby— or, your stomach, i mean."

nodding, you stretch your legs out in front of you and lay down a bit, lifting up brock's hoodie and your shirt to show him your bump.

it wasn't supposed to be emotional but you can't help but tear up when quinn's eyes gleam. you can see that he's overwhelmed with feelings and it makes you think back to the day you found out you were pregnant.

"i know this is a lot. you can take your time to think about it.."

he looks up at you, eyes glossy like yours. "i want to be here for you and the baby, i know that for a fact. i'm not leaving you by yourself."

"are you sure? i've been staying with brock and you might need time to process," you tell him, reassuring that it's okay if he's not ready to commit right now.

"y/n, i'm telling you. you're not going through this alone. this is our baby and i'm here for you both, that's a promise."

"thank you."

"don't thank me.. i should be thanking you. i should have been there to help."

"it's okay. brock makes a pretty good baby daddy," you laugh and quinn smiles.

you both take in each other's prescence for a moment, quinn's eyes flickering back and forth between you and your bump.

"look.. i know you like me. that's the reason why i left in the first place," he tells you. your heart drops but you shrug it off, listening to what he's saying.

"i don't want to break your heart. i want to take care of you but i still want to be with my girlfriend."

you nod, although your heart strains against your chest. "that's alright. i totally understand that, no worries."

"you sure?"

"quinn, i can't force you to like me. maybe if i'd told you about the baby earlier we could have tried something like you said, but i didn't and that's okay. i'm happy you're happy, that's all i ever want."

"thank you."

"you're welcome. but, there's also one other thing i want."

"what is it?"

"a chicken quesadilla from taco bell with extra cheese, and cinnabon delights."

"oh—"

"can you get it for me?"

"why do i need to get it for you?"

"hello, quintin! i'm pregnant with your child, did you already forget?" you ask in disbelief and his eyes widen.

"shit, sorry. that's gonna take some getting used to."

[sunshinefarabees]

love drunk (j.f)

pairing: joel farabee x reader + best friend!kevin hayes 

words: 4.0k 

warnings: mentions of alcohol, bars, kissing, and ofc teasing by friends

author’s note: hi hello! i apologize for any errors as i’m eighteen and have never drank/gone go a bar before:) thanks, besties. also special tags to @joelsfarabees (helped me come up with the idea), @huggybug , @cartahhart79 , @quietblues , @ethancale , and @1-800-iluvhockey for encouraging + proofreading + and giving me ideas. and ofc @fiveminutesforfarabee for throwing hc’s about bf!joel with me to go back on for this fic. this wouldn’t have become a thing without any of you- i love you all forever<3 and @bitchinbarzal because i said i would tag you<3 your ig edits are immaculate

 the fluorescent lights from the dance floor bounced off the blue swirls of the bar counter. it felt cool against your forearms compared to the warmth and humidity of the club- sweaty bodies smashed together, laughing as they downed drink after drink as if it was water. your eyes met the rim of your glass, filled with some alcoholic beverage that you had ordered half an hour ago. the ice was slowly watering it down, not that it mattered, as you honestly weren’t that interested in it.

your gaze broke from the glass as suddenly an arm found its way around your shoulders. you flinched slightly before relaxing into the familiar feel of kevin hayes. his cologne smelled of sandalwood and lavender, something that was unique to him.

“fuck yeah! y/nnnn!” he slurred, pulling you closer as he swayed side to side, “where’s your lover boy, bestie?” 

you chuckled, softly pushing him into the wooden stool next to you, “he’s not my lover boy, kev, he’s over there chatting with teeks and ratty.”

of course, kevin was talking about joel. you and joel had met several months ago from mutual friends, kevin being one of them. the moment you had met him, his honey pooled eyes, goofy smile, and just the amount of calm he brought to a room stole your heart. however, you knew that the gorgeous hunk of man was so obviously out of your league. joel was a national hockey league player with a bright future and a huge heart; someone you felt would never be interested in you.

“fuck that! you want him to be!” kevin giggled, as he poked your knees repeatedly with his finger. “i think that fucker likessss you!” 

you snorted, “yeah okay, hayesy. whatever you say, dude.” you slipped your drink, grimacing at the slight burn of the watered-down alcohol. you knew kevin was drunk, but your heart ached to believe that maybe, just maybe, joel would feel the same way about you. 

“shit- can- can i tell you a secret?” kevin hiccuped, a mischievous grin dancing across his face. 

“sure, kev. what’s up, buddy?” you motioned for the bartender, mouthing water, pointing at the 6’5 drunk next to you. 

the bartender chuckled, sliding you a glass as kevin continued.

“i-i know something about beezer that you don’t!” 

“i’m sure you know a lot of things about joel that i don’t.” you passed him the water, satisfied as he downed half of it in one gulp, the large bar glass looking small in his hand.

“no, no-“ he coughed, placing the glass back on the bar counter, “fuck- i mean- he likes you! shit- you’re all he fucking talks about during practice and games. god, he never shuts the fuck up about you, y/n/n!” he was giggling like a schoolgirl, too out of it to notice how red your face had become. “hold on, i’m gonna go get another fucking drink! byeee y/n/n! i looove you, bestie!” kevin gave you a half squeeze before wandering in a random direction.

watching him walk away, you felt your heart start to race. what the hell was kevin talking about? joel? have feelings for ME? you thought, yeah okay. out of habit, your eyes wandered to where joel was standing with travis, oskar, and isaac. his head was thrown back, bouts of laughter escaping his lips, which of course hid his teeth. he was dressed in a white collared shirt, the first few buttons undone with black jeans. his chest was in full view, his gold chain glistening against the vibrant lights of the club. your eyes followed his arms to his hands, the left one holding a beer while the right moved as he talked. 

your eyes closed as you pursed your lips, butterflies filling your stomach. he looked incredible. opening your eyes again, you saw a new addition coming to joel’s presence. kevin. 

you chuckled as he stumbled into joel, grinning as he did so. you sipped your drink again, watching the five interact. however, you choked as kevin pointed at you, joel’s eyes finding yours. 

attempting to regain your composure, you offered a smile and a tiny wave that joel returned before turning back to his friends. you watched kevin babble to them and point in your direction before he started heading over to you again. 

“yes, hollywood? how may i be of service?” you sipped your drink, attempting to mask the anxiety of whatever shenanigans he was up to as he approached.

“need you to come with me-“ he slung an arm around your shoulders, pulling you with him. “it’s important, bestie.” 

“christ- okay. hold on, buddy.” you laid a bill on the counter, paying for the drink you had barely touched as you grabbed the rest of your things. “okay, now, where are we going?”

kevin gave you a mischievous grin, “i’m being your fucking wingman!” 

you sputtered, confused as he led you across the room, “w-what? what the hell are you talking about?”

“just trust me, babe- shit’s going to be great.” 

you groaned, “kevin- you’re way too drunk for this!”

he scoffed, “actually, y/n/n, i drank water, remember? i’m cool as a damn cucumber.”

“yeah- and you went for a drink afterward, remember?” you mocked him, “besides- when the hell do you ever say you’re-“ you were cut off abruptly when you came to a screeching halt. a few feet away stood the same man you were admiring from the bar moments ago. joel. 

“now here’s the plan-“

“plan?” your head whipped over to kevin bewildered, “what?”

“the plan for you to admit to joel you-“ he started, but you slapped your hand over his mouth. 

“no. he’s-“ you ran your hand through your hair before pulling the 6’5 giant outside of the bar. as you gently made your way through the friday bar crowd, you could feel yourself spiraling. sure, kevin did know joel better than you, but joel liking you? you had gone through endless scenes where you confessed to him, but none of them ever resulted in what you wanted: reciprocated feelings- much less a relationship.

your thoughts broke as you opened the bar doors; the february air nipped at your arms, and the absence of a coat caused you to shiver.

“listen, i appreciate you. i do. you’re a great person and friend- and maybe an even better hockey player, but i’m not telling joel anything.”

he scrunched his face in confusion, his blue eyes searching your face for an answer, “what? why?” 

you turned your head away from him, biting the inside of your cheeks harshly, struggling to find the words you wanted to say. the street was lit up by streetlights, apartments, and businesses that were strangely still open at midnight. 

“kevin-“ you sighed, “he’s out of my league. he plays in the NATIONAL hockey league. he’s gorgeous, intelligent, funny… he could have anyone he wants- not me. i know what you said earlier, but… there’s no way he’s talking about me. you’re hardly present, dude.” 

kevin’s face softened, “y/n…” he blinked his eyes a few times before putting a comforting hand on your shoulder, “listen, i know i’m fucking drunk right now, but you should hear him talk about you. not anyone else. you. he’s fucking like- god, i’m going to ruin his chances because i’m fucking-“ he groaned, “y/n/n, he’s whipped for you. i’ve never seen him like this- we’re all sick of him. you’ve gotta talk to him- i know you like him too.”

your heart was hammering in your chest again. joel? liking you back? it felt like a dream. you felt so giddy as if you could do anything- which could be kevin’s second confession or the decent amount of alcohol in your system. “are you messing with me?”

he shook his head rapidly, “i mean every word, dude.”

you rubbed your hands on the scratchy, black material of your jeans, the anxiety and giddiness mixing in all at once. “okay.”

“huh?” kevin scrunched his face in confusion. 

“be my wingman.” 

he squealed (which honestly threw you off a bit, seeing as you didn’t know such a sound could come from someone that tall), “y/n, everything’s going to be great. here’s the plan.”

——

you had never felt this nervous in your life. your hands were clammy; you kept wiping them off on your black jeans to no avail. 

kevin’s hand was resting gently in the middle of your back, rubbing small circles, attempting to at least relax you a bit. he had already given you two shots of tequila for confidence, but they didn’t seem to be working as you both walked closer to the high table where joel, isaac, travis, and oskar sat. you could hear joel’s laugh from a mile away, causing butterflies to build in your stomach.

“hey, guys!” kevin grinned, “look who i found!” 

all four men offered hellos, immediately including you in the conversation of doors versus wheels. you were only half paying attention, your full attention being on joel. his brown eyes were concentrated as he discussed and took the side of doors, which made you accidentally snort in laughter. 

joel turned to you, a smirk dancing across his face, “you’ve got something to say, hm?”

“no-“ you grinned, chuckling, “it’s just obviously wheels.”

travis immediately signaled a high five, which you reciprocated. “thank you! someone with sense. i’ve been struggling with these guys forever!” his own brown eyes twinkled, seeming to grin as much as his mouth did.

“oh shut up, teeks. it’s totally doors.” isaac groaned, taking a sip of his beer, his other arm resting on the edge of the table. 

“it’s fuckin’ wheels! office chairs, stupid.” kevin piped up, beaming as you and travis both high-fived him. 

joel, noticing a particular blonde was quiet, nudged his head towards oskar. “osky, baby, what’s on your mind?“ 

oskar set his beer down with a soft smile, “i have my thoughts, but you guys are more entertaining to watch.” 

the conversation continued, laughter and teasing erupting often. by the time kevin beckoned for travis, isaac, and oskar to follow him for more drinks (not before he sent a wink your way and mouthing go), it was only joel with the opinion of doors. 

“i can’t believe after all that evidence you’re still saying doors!” you exclaimed, joel throwing his head back in laughter. 

“maybe i’m just saying it to see your reaction,” he smirked, lifting his beer to his lips, swallowing what was left.

you glared at him, slightly kicking him under the table, “farabee, you’re a menace.”

“says you! you’re kicking me!” he teased, slightly kicking you back.

“you’re a hockey player!” you retorted, “you feel nothing in your calves!” 

joel fake gasped, “how rude of you to assume they feel nothing!”

“beezer, you get hit with high sticks, slashes, and pucks on a regular basis. my size seven foot isn’t doing anything to you.” 

he stuck his tongue out at you as you laughed. the energy around you felt electric. music blared over the speakers as you both got lost in conversation. 

as you felt joel’s fingertips creep against your own, the familiar chords of paper rings by taylor swift caused you to break out in a grin. 

“cmon farabee- you have to dance with me!” you closed the distance, grasping his hand and slipped out of the tall, wooden chair. 

joel‘s face reddened as the quick source of contact, letting you lead the way. “but babe!” he whined, “i can’t dance!”

the nickname caused your face to do the same as you pulled him onto the dance floor. “who cares?”

in response, he gave you a nervous smile before spinning you around. his white shirt opened revealing more of his chest and chain. 

“see? you’re doing great!” your eyes found his, trying not to stare at his neck as you gave him a reassuring smile. 

you both danced a while, laughing as the other stumbled a little. the room around you melted again. it didn’t matter to joel that it was late and he had an early practice tomorrow. nor did it matter to you that here you were, dancing the night away while you had a final paper to work on. the bodies around you seemed to disappear. the budding chemistry that had shied away during the first months of friendship had now come with full force. not that either of you would admit it to each other in the moment, but this felt different. 

little did you know, joel felt dizzy. having your hands wrapped around his? he felt like he was dreaming. his eyes kept finding your lips, which was engulfed in a smile at him each time. joel could hardly keep his rhythm, too infatuated with you. 

song after song played, before finally settling on a slow one. 

“may i?” joel’s hands softly found their way to your waist, watching your face for any signs of discomfort. 

you gave him a soft nod as your hands found their way to his neck.

a comfortable silence fell over the two of you. moments passed before the melody of joel’s sweet compliments fell upon your ears. “you look so beautiful, you know.” he muttered, continuing to gently sway your bodies back and forth.

your cheeks reddened, his voice echoing in your head just as the feeling of his hands that rested near your belt loops started to sink in. “i was- i was just thinking the same about you.” your voice came out softer than you intended, as your fingers gently started playing with the ends of his hair, attempting to test the waters. the boundaries of this dance- of whatever this was- were unclear. sure, kevin had told you joel had liked you. sure, this seemed pretty romantic with the whole slow dancing and being called babe. however, everything was still unsaid which increased your anxiousness of the whole situation.

noticing your apprehension, joel sent you a soft smile and a gentle nod, letting you know it was okay. 

in comfortable silence, you both danced together. it felt nice to just be with joel. having the same friends as well as being friends, everything felt chaotic. but here and now? though the music was loud, being connected with simple touches was exhilarating in the calmest way. 

“hey,” joel mumbled after the song ended, “it’s getting late. do you need a ride home?” his fingers gently slipped under your shirt, rubbing gentle circles in your sides, still swaying. 

“no, no. i’m okay. kev was my-“ you cut yourself off, your face scrunching in confusion as the realization hit you, “what the hell happened to our friends?”

he chuckled, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly, “no clue- kinda glad they disappeared though- nice to be with just you, y/n/n.” 

you felt your face heating up as you hid in his shoulder, “shut up, farabee.” 

a laugh echoed through his lips, his chest vibrating with the sound, “sorry, y/n.”

the comfort yet excitement you found in the moment made you dizzy. the buzz of the alcohol faded, but the buzz of joel was building. HIS hands on your sides; HIS chest against your face. you were on fire. your skin felt hot as you slowly looked up at him, his hand finding your face. 

time felt slow as you watched his eyes glance at your lips as you glanced at his until you found his eyes again. 

joel’s pupils were blown and only focused on you. 

“can… can i kiss you?” he whispered, eyes scanning your face for any signs of discomfort.

you nodded, a gentle smile taking over as he finally pressed his lips against yours.

the feeling of joel’s lips on yours was electrifying. it felt like fireworks were exploding in every nerve of your body.  if this were the princess diaries or some older film, you’d have the foot pop. you never wanted it to end.

——

you and joel kissed for a long time, his gentle lip bites and face holding drove you crazy in the best way. fireworks still gently exploded throughout your veins, and the feeling of his face against your palms made you feel dizzy.

when he did finally pull away, cheers and whoops exploded from the booth behind you, causing you to whip around to find the culprits. meanwhile, joel’s arm found its way protectively around your waist- pulling you closer.

kevin, oskar, travis, and isaac had begun to all high-five each other.  

“fucking finally, dude!” a huge grin covered kevin’s face as he barreled over, crushing you both into a hug. “i’m so glad this is finally out in the open. you guys are fuckin’ perfect for each other!”

“i had to get the right moment!” joel replied, “this is the one that matters, kev! i couldn’t just wing this shit.” 

a huge smile covered your face as the words left his mouth. “one that matters, huh?”

realizing what he said, joel’s eyes met the tiled floor as he blushed with a soft smile, “well… yeah. it’s you.”

although the club was loud, a comfortable silence fell over the six of you. though neither you or joel knew it, the peace that your friends felt for you was immediate. they knew how much you liked each other from the beginning. it was the small things. it was oskar that first started noticing the small stares joel would give you from across the room. it was isaac that noticed how different joel would act when you were around- even before you met- back when you were just kevin’s friend. it was travis that noticed how your eyes seemed to gloss over when you and joel were properly introduced to each other. finally, though, it was kevin who pieced together that the person joel was whining and going on about was you- his best friend. 

“joel, next time, maybe try not to wait six months to ask them out.” travis chirped, earning a glare from the man in question. 

you blushed, kissing his shoulder, “six months?” you teased, giving his hand a gentle squeeze for reassurance.

pretending not to hear you, joel sent you a sheepish smile, “so… do you still want me to drive you home?” his arm still wrapped around your waist. 

you chuckled, noticing his change in demeanor, “i do, is that okay?”

“yeah, y/n/n! cmon. i’ll drive you home, yeah?” joel’s lips found the crown of your head, sending the boys a wave, ignoring the teases they sent your way.

as you both started to make your way out, your eyes found kevin’s as he gave you a thumbs up. you mouthed thank you, watching as he shook his head with a smile.

turning back as joel opened the door for you, your hand found his. “i had a great time tonight.”

his calloused fingers, though rough, felt soothing against the top of your knuckles as you both walked. “me too. i’ve wanted to do that for so long.” he admitted, “i just never thought in a million years that you’d like me back.” 

screeching to a halt, your head whipped around to face him bewildered. “what? you- joel? are you serious?” 

he chuckled at your reaction, gently pulling you to walk again, but stopping when he realized you were serious. “well… yeah. most people only like me for my money. you aren’t like that. you’re going to college- you could have anyone you want. i’m just a hockey player. i never finished school. sure, i have a career that i’m somewhat successful in, but i mean- i don’t have a degree. this ends in what? twenty years? that’s not stability. don’t get me wrong, i love the game. i wouldn’t change my life for anything- this is a dream and i’m so grateful for all the opportunities i have. but for you? you deserve someone with an education- someone who can provide for you and be home for you all the time. you and kevin are close, you know what it’s like. i just… i never thought that you would downgrade your options for someone like me.”

you felt yourself start to spiral. the facts that joel firstly, liked you first, and secondly, didn’t think he was good enough for you hit you like a truck. the same man that you had been crushing on for months and sneaking glances at from afar thought he wasn’t good enough for YOU. 

“joel- what? how could-“ you were sputtering, struggling to find the right words to say. “how could you even think that? i’m not trying to be invalidating, but you’re… you. you’re becoming one of the best hockey players in the league. you were drafted at eighteen. g said you were going to beat all of his records- not just anyone, but claude giroux said that to you. you have the biggest heart of anyone i know. you’re constantly putting your all into the game and life. joel, no offense, you could be working at wawa and I wouldn't give a shit. i like you because you’re you- not because of your career or how much money you make. you’re an incredible human being, joel farabee. i never want to hear you say any different.” you finished, slightly out of breath.

joel just stared at you, his mouth slightly agape. 

“alright. now that that’s taken care of, c'mon. i’m tired.” you grabbed his hand, pulling him to his car that sat a few feet away. 

wordlessly, he opened the car door for you as he unlocked it, still in a daze. you watched as he got into the driver’s seat before he turned to you. 

“that was one of the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me. thank you for believing in me.” joel sent you a toothless smile, before starting the car.

the ride to your apartment was quiet besides the gentle hum of the radio and the beating of your heart as his hand found yours. 

as he pulled into the parking lot of your apartment complex, he parked the car wordlessly before jogging over to open your door for you. 

“what a gentleman.” you giggled, as you took his hand. 

“only for the best.” joel smiled as he shut the car door behind you. 

hand in hand, you both started the walk to the elevator. of course, joel held open every door for you- excluding the elevator button as he remembered how kevin said you loved to do so. the elevator ride was also silent, the two of you simply buzzing from the effects of each other. 

as the elevator reached your floor, your smile fell a little, knowing that your time with joel was almost to an end. before you knew it, you were face to face with your door. 

“so… i had a great time tonight,” you said, breaking the silence, and pressing a gentle kiss against his cheek.

“me too.” he grinned at you as you pressed another kiss to his nose. “maybe we could… do it again, sometime? just us?”

you exhaled, letting out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. “yeah… i’d love that. i’d really love that.”

“great. tomorrow at seven?”

“that’s perfect.” 

joel couldn’t stop smiling and neither could you. his right hand gently raised to your face, holding it gingerly as he gently leaned in.

your heart was racing, even if you both had just made out an hour prior. just like before, fireworks were exploding in every nerve in your body as his lips touched yours. you felt like you were floating. 

the kiss seemed to be too short as he softly pulled away, “i’ll see you at seven. goodnight, baby.” giving your hand a squeeze, he waved as you went inside your apartment.

you slid against the door, a blush covering your cheeks. you couldn’t believe that joel had just kissed you. you felt so giddy. 

you fished your phone out of your pocket and immediately sent a text to kevin.

to kevin mccallister 🏒: i owe you one. thank you so much<3 guess who has a date tomorrow @ 7 !! spoiler- me 😌

as if on cue, your phone dinged. confused as kevin never replies that fast, you looked at your phone again, immediately breaking out in a smile.

from joel 🥰: you’re an absolute dream. just left and i can’t get enough of you. can’t wait to see you tomorrow💞

[chriskreiderrr]

im posting my first fic today around noon eastern time so if you want to be tagged in it like, repost, or comment on this post!!

(this is also if you want to be tagged in my other fic posts)

tagging some friends: @1-800-iluvhockey @brenbrisson @bbrissonn @owenpwr @owenpowpow @hockey-lover-22

[huggybug]

lex’s 700 celly!!

this is actually insane, i don’t even know what to say. i just want to thank every single one of you for all of your support, love and kindness! being here and interacting with all of you genuinely makes me so happy<3 and to my friends, i’m so glad that this silly little site has let us meet each other and i love you all — to celebrate reaching another milestone, i’d like to do a little celebration💗

send in now!!

⭐️ my inbox is open: we can talk about anything and I’ll also be answering older asks!!

💫 requests: feel free to send in thoughts/concepts or ig edit requests. no blurb/fic requests for this please**

🌙 songs: send any hockey player and i’ll reply with a song that reminds me of them or that i connect them to! (stolen from riri🤭)

⚡️ play ask games: CYM, FMK, would you rather, get to know me, etc. also we’ll cast the boys (ex. cast umich as __) cause that seems fun :)

tagging some friends: @1-800-iluvhockey @owenpowpow @owenpowersglasses @dylandukerr @hugheshugs @boeswhore @bitchinbarzal @thomasbbordeleau @thombords @ethancale @bbrissonn @mattyybenierss @gigglyparker @calermakar08

** i’m still going to be posting usual fics and doing dilf day so i don’t want to overwhelm myself with blurbs or anything :)

[1-800-iluvhockey]

it's never over - l.hughes

----

2:22 seconds remained on the clock, the third period is headed to the end. heart is racing, nerves and stakes are too high. every michigan fan is on the edge of their seat; they know that their team can do this, y/n knows that luke can do it. holding onto her hand tightly, ellen watches with y/n as luke skates down the ice trying everything he can to block shots.

"cmon, I know you got it in you. michigan magic." y/n whispers, ellen's hand grips tighter when she sees the shot go in, the shot that luke barely missed. now it's 4-2, and only about 1:45 left. a commercial break pauses the game but doesn't break the tension on the ice.

"ellen---" y/n says in almost a whisper as they see luke skate back to the bench, trashcan in hand, head covered. "it's okay, he is doing it because he is nervous, probably didn't drink enough water -- that boy." ellen reassures y/n as she watches her boyfriend struggle through this third period.

"yeah, it is just hard watching it. nothing that I can do but sit here and ---" y/n's voice wavers and ellen brings her closer.

"it's okay honey, you're here and this is what matters. family matters, every hockey player wants their family in the stands to make them proud. luke needs you, he needs us here for him. you sitting here is doing more than enough for him. look." ellen calmed y/n as she got her attention back to the ice.

her boyfriend skates to the faceoff, looking up in the crowd for a split moment to try and find her. she waves, and he nods -- a short and sweet moment, just enough to know that she is there for him and that he knows she is right there when she needs him.

the music signals that the break is ending and the puck is to be in play, and all the emotions are back again.

----

luke knows how this goes, as he has been here before in this exact game spot, the year before. he knows the heartbreak, the struggle, the grief he is going to endure in the next few minutes when he hears that buzzer.

but two things were different this year; it was the end but it was truly the beginning --- because it is never over. y/n's sweet voice plays in his head as he gets ready to face off, he thinks of her singing this song in his car, praising (screaming obnoxiously to the classic rock) of her favorite jeff buckley song --- lover, you should've come over. he imagines her voice saying "it's never over" in his head, as he has done the whole game to keep him going.

in reality, after that buzzer hits -- his time at umich is over; but his hockey career is truly beginning. so yes, the grief and sadness he is probably going to endure after this whistle blows will be one of the hardest things of his life --- but it is different; he has his y/n to lean on. 

----

the whistle blows and the remaining seconds of the period play out; ports is out of the goal, and michigan does everything they can to stop quinnipiac from scoring an empty netter. a player steals the puck back which causes luke to go after him, eddy gets in net ready to play makeshift goalie. y/n's breath hitches as she knows that the quinnipiac player will score as luke hooks him and eddy has an opening.

boom.

5-2 quinnipiac, nail in the metaphorical hockey coffin. a sigh comes from jim as he sees luke talking with the ref, defeated. luke got a penalty for hooking, meaning quinnipiac was on a powerplay for the rest of the game. he looked defeated while entering the penalty box, which caused jim, ellen & y/n to look at each other, knowing how their boy was going to really feel.

"I made a bet with jack that he wouldn't break his stick this year -- let's hope I win." y/n kindheartedly joked as jim laughed. "that penalty might have set him off so I wouldn't be surprised if jack won the bet, y/n."

"I have faith that he won't beat himself up too badly this year, he has a pretty amazing girl to lean on and now a new career start. y/n?" ellen questions at the end, causing y/n to get confused. "yes?"

"you're ready for jersey right?" ellen asked as y/n looks at her like she has grown 3 heads.

"ellen, I am not going with him --- no way." she says questionably. her and luke talked about it but it was never a plan.

"y/n, you two have known each other for years, I know that you guys finally started dating last year -- but I know luke wants you in jersey." ellen tells her as jim agrees.

----

the buzzer goes off which causes the conversation to be dropped as everyone rises out of their seats. half of the arena is full of cheerful quinnipiac and minnesota fans -- while the others are in denial about their seasons ending.

making their way to the locker room, y/n gets a glimpse of dylan, mackie and luke on the ice. defeat, just a look of sadness and shock on their faces. dylan looks and sees y/n in the tunnel, and just shakes his head. y/n reciprocates it but in a more "you did your best" type of head nod.

y/n and some of the families watched from the tunnel as the boys shook hands with each other. the boys led themselves back to the locker room, feeling the pain of the national title slip from their fingers once again. one of the last players off of michigan's side of the ice was indeed, a deflated luke hughes.

----

walking with his head down, helmet in hand --- luke couldn't even see who was waiting for him as he headed to the locker room. he just went to her, he could smell her perfume from a mile away. she opened her arms to her as he buried his neck into her shoulder. he didn't care who saw, he never did. he just cried, letting out the defeat into y/n's shoulder.

"it's never over baby, you still got a whole career left. I am so proud of you." y/n whispered into his neck as he nodded. his arms held her tighter as the shock factor went away. he was done with college hockey.

college hockey brought him some of his best friends/teammates and gave him the courage to finally ask y/n out on a date. without college hockey, he wouldn't be who he was today, and that's why his emotions are even higher than he would have thought.

after a few minutes, he pulled away and got a good look at his girl. his beautiful girlfriend was wearing his favorite maize jersey, looking like a total angel in this moment. she looked like she cried a few minutes ago, giving her the extra glowy effect. he was too lucky to have the best family, girlfriend, and career he could have.

grabbing her hands, he put them on his shoulders. "y/n, will you come with me? to new jersey?" he asked her softly as he watched as her eyes pooled with tears. she turns to look behind her, to find his parents looking at her, ellen nods and then she turns to him.

"always, wherever you go --- I want to come with you. I love you." she says, kissing him softly.

"good, I was hoping you didn't say no." luke says as they walk over to his parents, hand in hand.

he wasn't okay, but he knew that the grief was temporary.

michigan would always be there for him. it is home, well, a home. home was really where y/n was. all he wanted was to be with her and play hockey, but those michigan memories will be with him; those were the forever type of memories. as the university of michigan, yost arena, hockey house, and all of those friends, teammates, and memories were going to last forever. he also couldn't forget about those michigan summers, those summers on the lake with his friends and family are going to be something he can't wait for in the off-season.

forever type of memories.

they would never go away; even if it was over.

[bbrissonn]

Erik = Under appreciated there are no firs under his tag but like imagine him calling you right after they won 😭🤚🏻 cuz we know how sweet he is like how eager he was to shake the other teams hand so cute 

he truly is-- also, @1-800-iluvhockey has 2 fics about him :)

you'd be the first person he calls after his family, he'd have like the biggest smile on his face and he'd just be so excited. you'd talked for a couple of minutes before he has to go, and when they got on the plane, he spend the whole time texting you and sending you snaps with the guys.

[ancient-remnants-of-love]

ok so please vote in my inbox but would u rather have my briss fic be in his or her pov???

tagging some friends so i can get a good consensus

@driverpicksthe-music @1-800-iluvhockey @owenpowpow @owenpowersglasses @oskarlidblom @cobrakaisb @studsccsnackavoybambi @thombords

[nicohischierz]

it’s the way i told @1-800-iluvhockey that i have a dad!quinn fic that i’d post LAST WEEK but it’s still not done. 

instead i posted two nolan au fics and a nico fic 😁 

[mattsboldyy]

@1-800-iluvhockey IS A ANGEL

ily 4ever <3

OMG THANK YOU

(when all of y’all are loving this part 2 to the brendan fic, you can thank @1-800-iluvhockey)

[matthewkniesys]

Hi guys, so I started working on a new fic for Thomas Bordeleau! Ahhhh, Im so excited for this one.  Its going to mostly be very soft. Its still in its early stages but ill try to get it out sometime in the next week.Also thank you so much to abbs ( @1-800-iluvhockey ) for motivating me and helping with the idea.

[hugheshugs]

joker street | q. hughes

prompts: #13 — "call me right fucking now." // #73 — "your hands are shaking." // #78 — "don't fucking scare me like that."

summary: you go to the scary part of town and are being followed.

pairing: overprotective!quinn x skittish!reader

word count: 1.6k

warnings: creepy dude, reader being followed, creepy dude approaching reader.

note: jt miller appearance !! also, i might do another fic w these prompts, i was working on one but scrapped it so idk when it'll be up but ya, incase this one flops lmao. this one was requested by boestie simmy, thank u my love !! i hope u enjoy this one <3

taglist: @heatabovejakey @boeswhore @calemakarjuice @pandas-daisy @rainysuitcaseprunegiant @1-800-iluvhockey @owennpower @drei-mrssvechii @idfan21 @thescooby-gang @owenpowersglasses @owenpowerstapejob // join my taglist here :)

to say quinn is an overprotective boyfriend would be an understatement. you have no words to describe how much he hovers over you and eyes you like a hawk but to be honest, you enjoy it. you like the feeling of having someone care so much about your safety, no matter how much it irritates you sometimes.

taking that into account, no one can blame you for not telling him about your whereabouts. obviously he didn't need to know your location 24/7 (and he doesn't care to either), but telling him about your current location probably would have helped you out a little.

you and quinn had a small argument last night about you being too careless (which you knew he was right about, you just didn't want to admit it), and now you're scared out of your mind because you refuse to call him for help. you don't know why you thought this was a good idea. there's a really good donut place on the rougher side of the city, the side your parents warned you about growing up, and you wanted to try it. so here you are, all by yourself, alone and struggling to find the place.

an eery feeling crawls up your neck as you notice the sun setting. it probably wasn't the best time to come either, because when night falls from day, the jokers come to play. it also doesn't help that you're a skittish person and are very fearful of bad people (which is basically what you're surrounded by).

"hey, pretty. nice hair."

you turn around abruptly, pulling your hair out of the mans grasp. your eyes widen as you realize how close he is to you and you stumble backwards. how had you not noticed him behind you?

"um, t-thanks."

you keep walking, faster than before but more alert as well. your gut tells you the man hasn't stopped following you and a quick glance to the side confirms your suspicions. your palms begin to sweat and tears pool at your eyes. quinns words from last night ring in your ears.

"you're too fucking careless, y/n! you're gonna do something stupid one day and i won't be there to protect you, what'll you do then?"

what will you do? you can't even think straight at the moment.

unbeknownst to you, someone else is watching you as well. that someone being the one and only, jt miller. he had come here for the same reason you did, only he was able to actually find the place. then he saw you, the girl he knows shouldn't be out here by herself, and grew concerned.

he wants to walk up to you, he really does, but he wouldn't be able to handle whatever breakdown he knows you're going to have when he confronts you. calling quinn is his best option. the phone only rings a couple times before he picks up.

"hey, quinner.. you busy right now?"

"no, why?"

"i came to joker's and saw y/n roaming around all by herself. there's someone following her, i got an eye on her though. you mind getting here quickly?"

quinns heart drops at his words. "there's someone following her?"

"yeah but he's a bit far away. i'm following them right now," jt confirms.

"i'll be there in like.. 6 minutes," quinn says hurriedly before hanging up and rushing to grab his keys.

quinn: call me right fucking now.

you see the text immediately and hesitate, knowing he'll probably be on your ass, and because you don't want the man following you to take advantage of your inattentive state. pushing those thoughts aside, you call quinn anyway.

"where the fuck are you?"

he doesn't say hi, only greets you with that angry, rough voice you've become a bit familiar with.

"i'm.. i'm, uh.." you struggle to tell him your whereabouts, heart pounding rapidly against your chest as you realize it's now dark.

"don't lie to me," he gritts through his teeth and you hear a car starting.

"i'm at joker street, but please don't be mad—"

"and why the hell didn't you tell me you were going there?"

"well, you were the one who said you don't need to know where i am all the time!"

"yeah but i'd like to know if you're paying a visit to the most dangerous part of town, thank you very much. where are you? send me your location."

you do as he says and sigh shakily, looking back to notice the man is gone. okay, great, one less thing to worry about. now the only things on your mind are quinn and donuts.

wrong.

you shriek as the man from earlier stands in front of you, towering over you with a mischievous look on his face.

"hey there, pretty girl. wanna play?"

swallowing the lump in your throat, you shake your head rapidly, salty tears falling from your eyes. "n-no. no, i don't."

"well, that's too bad."

your heart thumps rapidly against your chest, almost painfully when he grabs your arm and you shout again, sending quinn into absolute distress on the other side of the phone. he rushes to you as quick as he can, using the location you sent him.

what quinn doesn't hear is jt practically beating up the man who touched you and you being ushered to safety. and by safety that just means back to his car.

"y/n, you okay?"

you stay quiet but nod your head, a bit overwhelmed by the enounter. it doesn't take long for quinn to park his car beside jt's and run to the passenger seat where you're sitting. he opens the door aggressively and fails to meet your eyes because you won't look at him.

"hey, baby, how are you feeling?" he murmurs softly, cupping your cheek with his hand.

"scared," your voice cracks and he pulls you out of the vehicle as gently as possible.

after thanking his friend, quinn walks you back to his car and waits until you're both settled down before driving off. he doesn't want to say anything, not wanting to make you feel worse than you do, so he doesn't. he waits until you guys get to his apartment before speaking up.

"love, you okay?"

"mhm," you lie, finally making eye contact with him.

he shakes his head. "your hands are shaking."

"i-i was just really scared," you walk towards him and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into an embrace. "you were right. i'm stupid, i did something dumb and you weren't there to help me."

quinn feels some wetness on his neck and realizes you're crying. he wraps his arms around your quivering frame, rubbing your back soothingly.

"shh, it's okay, don't cry. you're okay, you're safe. i'm right here, i'll always be here."

he continues uttering sweet nothings into your ear until you pull away, eyes puffy with a reddening nose.

"i just wanted the donuts," you tell him, voice wavering. "i didn't think that would h-happen, also i don't really think i'm the most pretty girl in the world. you know that guy, he wouldn't stop calling me pretty, i mean he only said it twice but it was still a little weird. and he even touched my hair, he was twirling it around his finger! i yanked it away from him though."

quinn feels his anger towards the unknown man dissipating but only for a moment. his lip curls upward as he notices a spark in your eye, the storytelling almost diverting your attention from the emotions you're feeling. quinn doesn't realize how much he needed to see that, to hear the change in your voice until he actually did, and he feels his heartbeat steadying.

"you are pretty. you're the most beautiful girl in the world and please don't fucking scare me like that ever again," he says sternly, pointing an accusing finger at you.

"hey," you grab the finger and rest your head on his chest once more. "technically, i was the scared one, not you."

"that's true but baby, you don't know how scared i get when you're not safe."

"well, i'm the one that's not safe so that means i'm more scared."

"okay, i'm stopping this conversation before we start arguing again," he narrows his eyes at you and nudges your nose with his, making you laugh and hug him once more.

he rests his hands on your waist before eyeing something on the table behind you. "also.."

he walks the short distance to the table and toys with a bright pink box, opening it up and peaking inside. he lets out a sound of approval and you look at him confused before rushing over.

your eyes widen at the sight. "oh my goodness! quinn, where did you get these?"

the donuts. you see a dozen donuts, the ones you wanted to buy but failed to. they're colourful, beautiful, everything you hoped they would be.

"jt gave them to me before we left. you weren't even looking at me so you didn't notice that i had them and brought 'em in," he chuckles at your expression.

"i have to thank him.." you bite your lip in thought. quinn doesn't let your mind wander, grabbing a donut and shoving it in his face to grab your attention.

"hey! you were supposed to wait for me," you pout.

he brings it to your lips and you open your mouth, biting into the fluffy dough. you let out a satisfied hum as you chew and smile at quinns sprinkle covered lips.

"do my lips have sprinkles too?" you ask, not wanting to wipe them away. he nods and you look at him playfully.

he sees the gears turning in your head but they're too fast for him to catch on. before he knows it, your sprinkley lips are on his, the warmth melting the sugar into your mouths.

"you taste good."

"you taste better."

[1-800-iluvhockey]

sad beautiful tragic - (m.estapa’s version)

summary - mark’s first love had a everlasting effect on his life, and his heart. so before the first game of the season, he finally told the boys about y/n…..

type - (3.8 wc) fic, for the 300+ special!

warnings - rollercoaster of emotions, read with caution. </3

When Mark first met Y/n L/n, he truly thought that he had saw an angel in real life. He had saw her outside the rink one day, with skates in her hand. She had a glow to her, even though she was wearing a tri city storm hoodie and leggings. He couldn’t approach her to talk to her, as he was starstruck and she was on the phone. She saw him, looking around and then making eye contact with her. She waved at him, smiling brightly as she said a “okay dad whenever you can unlock the door is fine.” and hung up to walk over to the cute boy anxiously freaking out.

“Hi I’m Y/n, I saw you—“ She started to say until Mark cut off in a quick way.

“Yeah sorry about that, I wanted to come up to talk to you but I saw that you are the phone. I can unlock the door if you need me to? My coach is still in there.” He laughed as they both walk to the door.

“My dad’s got it, he just got out of practice.” She told him, beaming at him.

“What’s your name, pretty boy? I’ve seen you around here a few times.” She flirted as she looked to see someone headed to the door.

“It’s Mark, Mark Estapa. It’s my first season with Storm. Y/n…..” Mark trails off.

“L/n, Y/n L/n. Nice to meet one of my dad’s players, I won’t tell him that you were flirting in the beginning, but I don’t mind.” She tells him as his face turns from pale to pink.

“I haven’t even tried to fully flirt yet, unless you want me to over ice cream.” Mark says as he flashes her a smile.

The door opens and Mark holds it open, thanking the person who held it open for them. Y/n took out a slip of paper and a pen, scribbling a few things down before handing it to the tall boy.

“Here’s my number, ice cream? I’m good with that but I prefer milkshakes, Estapa. Text me!” She says happily as she sprints off to the ice.

“I’m the lucky one— I have to text the guys about this.” He told himself as he saved her number under “Y/n 💖”

—-

He laughs at the memory now, as he sits in econ. Now he is a freshman at the University of Michigan, and that memory feels like a whole other lifetime ago.

He would never forget her though, she was his first everything. He would rearrange the stars for her………

His Y/n.

He has never told the boys about Y/n, and he never thought about it until recently.

They have been trying to set him up with a pretty girl that was in the sorority house next to the hockey house. She was gorgeous and super nice, but Mark just couldn’t say yes. Not when Y/n was still fresh in his mind. He saw her in everything he did. At practice, eating, sleeping, in the pictures on his phone, the music he listens to…… just everything. She meant so much to him, and he wasn’t ready yet. So he decided as he was listening to one of her favorite songs.

Sad Beautiful Tragic by Taylor Swift. At first when she talked of it, it didn’t make sense. Until after she left him, and he saw the lyrics for what they were. So, he texted the boys that they needed to meet after practice at his dorm, and he was going to tell them about Y/n.

—-

“Woodruff! If you drop me I am going to be so upset!” She giggled in his ear as he picked her up and spun her around.

They had “broken into” the rink at night so he could take her on a date for their 6 month anniversary. So naturally he took her to dinner and then to skate but this time to skate at the rink that they had met at.

“Babe I’d never drop you!” He told her as he pretended to lose his grip.

“MARK!!!” She yelled excitedly as they both laughed.

He thought of that memory as Eddy fell into him at practice and he caught him. Eddy was joking about how Mark was his “guardian angel” and Mackie joked about how Eddy wouldn’t be able to survive practice without Mark being a catcher for the team. Aka the one who would quite literally catch the people who fell into him accidentally, even with his stick in his hand. He’d laugh it off, but that memory of him & Y/n still played in the back of his mind.

—

Getting back to the dorm before the rest of the boys, he sat on his bed looking around his side of the dorm. Little things that he hung up for her that he didn’t even remember doing. The picture frame near his bed side with the two of them in front of the big M circle at the Quad. The little notes that he had kept in a jar on the shelf near his old hoodies that she had used to steal from him. The notes were hand written before every game, saying like “good luck marky!” or “I love you woodruff.” and stuff like that, that he loved. She had given him some keepsakes to keep for his dorm especially. Including her pair of skates at the bottom of his closet. It had her initials engraved on blade, and a 4 embroidered on the skate itself. 4 was her favorite number “of all time” she had said to him one day. He always looked out for the number 4 wherever he went. 444 was her “angel” number that she tried to explain to him one day, even though he had no clue what she had been talking about; he now saw it all the time.

The boys’ chaos by entering the dorm startled him out of his dream like trance.

“Hey Mark. What’s so important that it had to be after practice? You okay?” Duker asked him as they all took seats around the small dorm.

“I wanted to talk to you about something important to me— because you keep bringing that girl—“ Mark tried to tell them as Mackie cut him off.

“The one from the sorority that we keep trying to set you up with?” Mackie asked, smirking a little, hoping this would go in a good direction.

“Yeah, and nothings wrong with her, she is super nice and everything but…” Mark told them as Luke looked at him, thinking he knew something was up.

“It’s the girl. The one from Storm. I remember you talking about her when we were at a game two years ago for recruitment.” Luke said as Mark nodded.

“You had a girlfriend this whole time?! I’m your roomie man?!” Eddy asked him questionably, feeling bad that he didn’t know his roommate well enough apparently.

The whole room erupted into yells but Luke kept looking at Mark with a “something is up” face.

“There a catch isn’t there, Estapa? Tell us about it….. that’s why we are here aren’t we?” Luke asked him as everyone grew quiet.

“Yeah Marky, tell us about your girl!” Duker said excitedly and Mark grabbed the picture frame by the table.

“Well…….. it’s a long story guys. Let’s start from where Luke said.” Mark said to the boys as the flashback starts in his head as he looked down at the picture frame.

—-

He remembers taking that picture like yesterday. They had been dating for a year when it was taken, and he was on his “commiting” trip to Michigan on an off weekend with the Storm. He invited his parents of course, and Y/n & her dad, which was coincidentally his head coach at Storm. There was no “bad blood” between them, and Mark was so excited to have all of his favorite people with him to go visit again and sign. The group had taken a tour through the grounds, and we’re headed to visit the arena when Y/n made Mark take a picture with him at the quad.

“Cmon ruff!! Take a picture with me, please!!” Y/n begged him with her classic bright smile. He could never say no to her, ever.

“Okay babe. Let’s take a picture! Hop on my shoulders!” He said as she laughed, hopping on his shoulders and his mom took a quick picture.

That soon became his favorite picture from that day. Even though that day emotionally wrecked him. They went to tour Yost again before signing, and while on center ice, he quickly took a picture of Y/n looking up at the board. She was just angelic as she stood in the middle of the M, glowing once more in one of his wolverine shirts that she loved to steal.

Soon after that picture was taken, Y/n and Mark had a moment in the tunnel, as the parents and coaches talked before he signed. The couple sat in the tunnel, at its edge, looking at the ice. She was side hugging him, and they sat in silence until she broke the silence.

“I wish I could see you play next year, M.” She said softly as she sighed.

“You’re going to, honey. I will fly you out here multiple times for you to watch. You’re going to have your own seat in the stands and—“ Mark started to ramble about the future until he heard her sniffle.

“Baby?” Mark said as he turned to her, hugging her.

“I have something to tell you— I may not be here next year at all.” She told him, wiping the tears off her face.

“Why? I’m not leaving you—“ Mark said softly to her.

“I have stage four cancer Mark, it’s aggressive and I— I only have not even 9 months left if I’m lucky…..” Y/n told him as his face turned pale.

“What?” Mark ask her questionably.

“It’s a blood cell type cancer that isn’t responding to any type of treatment…. I didn’t want to distract you but since the season is getting close to the end and you go to school soon…..” Y/n explained as her words just rang through his ears.

“Estapa! We’re ready for you to sign.” Coach Pearson said, cutting off the conversation.

“Okay Coach! Give me one minute.” He told his future coach as the pair stood up.

“Listen to me, we have tons of time, and see those seats at center, about nine rows up?” He told her as she nodded, not understanding what he was saying.

“I’m going to be waiting for you in those stands at every game. Looking for you in my jersey during every warm up and pointing to it every goal. You’re going to be here, I promise. I love you— we can talk more about this soon, okay?” He told the anxiety ridden girl, trying to consol his girlfriend as they walked to the room so Mark could sign.

—-

Two months later is when Coach Pearson contacted him after signing and asked him about his potential number options.

“Okay so what numbers are you looking at?” Coach asked over the phone as Mark looked at his sleeping girl friend in the chair next to him.

“I want 94 Coach, if I can. 4 for my girlfriend and 9 for me..” He told his coach as he tried to confirm it with the company. But the 9 wasn’t just for him, but for her as well.

“Big number, Estapa. It’s going to look good. We will see you in August, #94.” Coach P said laughing and he said goodbye.

Y/n stirred in the chair and she looked up at her boyfriend. Her boy who she loved so deeply. She was going to miss him so much.

“Mark? 94?” She asked him sleepily as he hugged her tight.

“Yeah, 4 for my girl, and 9 to say fuck cancer. I think it’s a good number, I like 94.” He told his girlfriend happily as she cuddled into him.

“I love you Mark Woodruff. With all of my heart, you’re going to do great things as #94.” She told him, kissing him softly.

—-

Month three, and Mark’s & Y/n’s anniversary took the turn for the worst. They were at the anniversary dinner when she started to feel sick and weaker. She didn’t say anything to Mark, putting on a famous Y/n smile and having the best night with the love of her life. It was perfect, the best night she had in her life…….. and one of the last normal ones she had.

A week after their year and a half anniversary, she was then hospitalized and put on life support. Everything had gone downhill in Mark’s life and he couldn’t handle it. The season just ended, Y/n was now even sicker than she was before…… he wanted some more time, but time couldn’t help him. She was on life support and couldn’t even talk back to him, it hurt his soul to see her like this. Even paler than he had ever seen her, she was still glowing with her light. He didn’t know if he would even see her smile again, but it was all that kept him going.

—-

The month passed, and it was month four out of the nine that she had told him about. She had gotten off of life support a week ago, and everything was headed in a better direction, at least that’s what Y/n lead Mark to believe.

The doctor told her that once she woke up, if she went under life support again, she may never wake up again. Morbid, but finally to the truth.

She decided to write more notes to Mark…. Pregame ones, post game ones, birthdays, anniversaries, when he’s sad “read these” or when he misses her “read these” type notes and put them in a jar. She also wrote him letters, letters about how it wasn’t his fault, and how he needed to find love again. Some letters just about how much that she loved him, other letters about memories that were her favorite, she made playlists for him to look at after she was gone, a book list & more as well. She wanted him to be prepared, but not overwhelmed. The letters became a big journal, that was red and had a M on it for Mark, and a 94 on the back. She also wrote a list of stuff for her mom to give to Mark when she passed.

It was really sweet, the amount of effort that she had put into making everyone happy all the time. That’s why everyone was even more devastated when she passed away in her sleep one night. It was a night after Mark left the hospital late, because Y/n and Mark had a deep conversation about the stars and life. It was 4 hours of talking, laughing, snuggling and taking in every moment. She hugged him extra tight that night, making sure to get every kiss in before he had to leave.

“Woodruff?” She asked him softly as he made sure he had everything before he went to leave.

“Yeah, babe?” He asked her softly, as she sat up. She just looked at him, taking in every single feature of the 6’1 boy who she fell in love with, who stood by her side, and loved her unconditionally through everything.

“I— I love you so much Mark. I love you, I love you. My 94, my everything.” She told him softly as he came and kissed her softly and then kissed her forehead before leaving. “See you tomorrow baby, I love you.” He told her, looking at her, as she gave him one last smile.

“Wait, babe, let me take a picture.” He said taking his phone out, capturing the memory of the smile…. not knowing it would be the last time. She smiled as he took it, and she tried to reach for her phone to do the same.

“I would if I could lift my arms babe. It’s in my heart forever.” She told him as he blew a kiss to her, walking out the door…. without knowing those would be the last words they ever exchanged.

—-

That was the last time Mark ever saw that smile in person. The night that his Y/n left him, but not without being in her own terms. Her mom had a list of instructions, letters for everyone important in her life, and the journal with everything for Mark in it. He was heartbroken, but his heart soared at how Y/n not only left on her own terms, but impacted so many people along the way.

The first thing he did was read the letter entitled: “94”. (written in big gold letters.) To: Woodruff From: Baby (in the signature blue ink that she loved)

M,

If you are reading this, that means that I am not with you anymore. Not by choice, I promise. When I wrote this, I had full intentions on staying longer, but times change. I know it’s going to be hard, but stay strong babe. You have your whole life ahead of you, and you’re going to do great things in this world. You have meant everything to me, and I am so so grateful that I was able to have you in my life. My soulmate, my love, the hockey boy who changed my world for the better. I am always watching over you! I have left Mom to give you some things that I have specifically left for you, but you can take other things if you want; I just need you to have the ones that she give you. Keep it, throw it away, burn it or whatever, just at least get it. Please. I was thinking about some conversations about life and the future that we had recently, and writing this makes me realize that I don’t have that much time with you left. I am so sorry that I can’t stay longer, I wanted to be in those stands for your games so bad. I’ll be wearing your 94 jersey in— well, wherever I’ll be. I will be watching over you as long as you let me, honey. But don’t be sad, go live your life, have fun, travel, love again. Please, love again, because your love is too good to be kept hidden. Thank you for being my boy and I love you to the moon and to Saturn, my woodruff. My Mark. <3

- Y/n

P.s: look up at the stars or stands when you miss me, I’ll for sure be everywhere, but especially there <3

—-

He took all of the stuff that her mom had left for him like she said, and went through everything. He had it rough for awhile. July is when reality hit and he had to start packing for August. He packed all of the stuff that she had given him to put in his dorm, not forgetting her skates. Her lucky skates. The book was safely hidden, and the jar was too.

August came and life started to change. He moved into the dorms, read a note everyday from the jar, went to practice and started to feel normal again. He had new teammates, new friendships, and new girls. But, time could never erase the hold Y/n had on Mark’s heart.

He partied some to keep the pain at bay, but then he would meet more girls which made it harder to turn down. It was tough. But he had to do it for now, until he could heal more.

September came and hockey was about to have the first game of the season. Everyone was ready to keep it going, now with crowds and energy. Mark was nervous, as it had been awhile since he played a game without his girl in the stands, but he knew she’d be there, somewhere.

That’s when the boys started to talk to Mark about the sorority girl, and how this story got told.

—-

“Well, that is the story of Y/n. That’s the reason—“ Mark says until he is cut off by Duker hugging him.

“I’m sorry I pushed, I’m sorry.” Dylan said, almost crying on his friends shoulder.

Everyone started to pile in, except for Luke. Luke was intrigued by the jar, he had been eyeing it since Mark mentioned it. Mark saw him look at it, and nodded him to grab it.

“Can I read one for tomorrow? The first game of the season?” Luke asked him softly, as the group looked to Mark anxiously.

“Yeah— go ahead Hughesy.” Mark said to him as Luke opens the little handwritten note. It was in blue ink and swirly, neat cursive handwriting. It was beautiful, just like she was.

“Marky! Happy game day, you’re going to kill it #94! I love you! Section 4 Row 9.” Luke said as Mark teared up a little.

“She remembered.” Mark told the group.

“Gotta play your heart out every game, but especially tomorrow, stop sign! We love you so much and see you tomorrow.” Mackie said and everyone started to fan out.

—-

Eddy and Mark sat in silence for the rest of the night, and the morning was tense. They were both so nervous for their first NCAA game.

Eddy, however had made a plan with the social media team to leave a 94 jersey on a certain seat in the stands that night, for at least warmups. So, the boys got ready and leafy for pregame, Mark listened to some music that got him hyped, and he put his chain with her initials engraved on it for game day. His good luck charm we going to be with him tonight, extra. She bought that chain after their 11 month anniversary, after going to LA on vacation. He had little nerves about the game until they went to the tunnel. Seeing all of the fans there for warm up made him have flashbacks to the conversation he had with Y/n before he signed.

Stepping on to the ice, he felt good, getting all the nerves out. Looking at all of the sections in the stands, one by one. Almost like he was looking for a sign. Section 4, row 9 is where he saw the #94 jersey with the words L/N on the back, hanging on the front of the seat. His heart stopped, he smiled brighter than he had before, looking up to the roof for a quick second before whispering a “Hi baby.”

Time could never erase the hold that Y/n L/n had on Mark Estapa’s heart…. It was sad, beautiful and tragic.

—-

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