#this. had better be a cold or flu or something bc. if one of these ijits brought rona home. i will demand restitution

[fantasynsuch]

Adam Stanheight SFW + NSFW headcanons

REQUESTS FOR SAW OPEN!

2.3k words

Sfw

How you meet!

you two meet probably in the hallway of your crappy apartment complex.

you run into him from the corner, he had his headphones in and was listening to it on full volume, and you were running late for work

crashing head first into neighbor? you dick he probably thinks to himself as he realizes he just ran into his neighbor.

he'd seen you around before: mostly rushing to whatever crappy retail job of the month you had

he had thought you were really beautiful, but he was a coward at heart, so never did anything about it

this time he didn't have the choice to not interact with you: well, without looking like a dick

"I am SO sorry. I'm such a dumbass." He rushes out before he can think

Youre still kinda in a little bit of shock, so you just look up at this incredibly handsome man who just face planted into you for a long while

he thinks your silence is you rejecting his apologies and he quietly apologizes and runs off

but you just were so enamored by him that you couldn't say anything

at work all you can think about is how you didn't accept his apologies and probably made him feel horrible

you were determined to make things right so after work you grab a couple packs of the smokes you always saw him with from the store and rush to his apartment

you timidly knock on his door and wait with bated breath

he sees you through the peephole and momentarily considers not answering it

but he sees the bag you have in your hand and is curious

he opens it, fully expecting to be yelled at for running into you

but all that happens is you raise the bag up quickly and say "i'm so sorry i didn't say anything, i feel so bad. i just was in shock because you're s-" you stop and say nothing after realizing your rambling

he looks in the bag and notices the smokes

you smile at him shyly

and that starts a beautiful relation

how you are as friends

you stay over ALOT

he tends to not eat the best so you make him alot of dinners and lunches to make sure he's eating regularly

his work as a professional stalker keeps him up at odd hours so those pre made meals are rlly a life saver

buying each other candy and snacks alot

when the other was having a rough month fiancially, you would try to pick up the slack andhelp them

that means buying the other small groceries and items to get them through till the next check

you stay over sm the other has toiletries like tooth brushes n soap at the others place

going to parties together but only talking to one another bc ur both not super extroverted

you just go for the free alcohol

speaking of which,,, taking care of each other when the other is drunk

he holds ur hair when ur sick in the toilet,

you rub his back when he's sick

when the other is actually ill as in cold or the flu, bringing each other soup n montioring each others temp

making sure the other takes their meds to get better

inevitably the other gets sick with the same thing, but it just ends up the same way with the other taking care of u

leaving notes in his mail slot when he's busy, and since its 2004, no fast messaging so "coming over at 5!! xoxo" in his mail slot

he lives kinda like a typical man with basically only a chair and essentials , bare ass living room

taking him to the thrift store to get like a decent couch n maybe an arm chair

helping him expand his wardrope to something beyond crappy second hand flannel n white shirt (preferably without blood on it)

helping him get through his trauma over the trap

you cant exactly help him get over it, but ur there when he has bad moments

holding him while he sobs in ur lap

just stroking his hair n reminding him hes here n not at the god awful bathroom

it really calms him down and reminds him he is present in this moment, not that one

he sometimes gets insecure about his scar on his shoulder and tries to hid it but you remind him that he shouldnt be embarassed for being strong enough to survive

helping him get back into normal non stalkery photographer- his need to make money to live kinda outweighed his desire to just take pics of birds

speaking of which: he def loves nature photography

he lives in new jersey, so its rare he gets to do that, but its a nice treat

road trips with him n he spends the whole time as a passenger princess asking you to stop n take pics of a dead tree that has a rlllly nice backdrop

ur crappy car probably breaks down once or twice but its part of the adventure

In a relationship

kisses. lot of f'ing kisses

neck kisses, forehead kisses, navel kisses. any types!

probably is the little spoon lbr

follows ur lead for the most part

want to go to the theatre? it may take out half his money but he WILL pay for the date

probably gets u sweet treats alot n writes a little note that says "love you babe!"

he def clings to you everywhere u go

got to go to the kitche? catch him hugging u from behind n not letting go

can't fall asleep without each other anymore

he used to have a twin sized mattress but he decided to buy a full after u moved intogether

speaking of which, he definitely moved into your apartment

you have a two bedroom n that allows him to have a red room for his photography and a bedroom

he probably only had a redroom and slept on the couch at his apartment tbh

typical man

very clean n likes to take showers with you

his fav thing is his hair being washed by you

the scraping on his scalp is incredibily grounding

he loves washing you as well, and not in a sexual way.

theres something so domestic about cleaning each other that he loves.

ultimately i think his interactions with cheating rich men has spoiled a bit of his view of marriage, but with you he really can see himself settling down and being a forever thing. beyond everything, he trusts you

he craves domesticity so he will enjoy providing for you and helping with the house

loves to cook, his mom probably taught him

doesn't really have a jealousy problem, though he can get jealous from time to time

very rare, but if he does, there might actually be a substantiated reason

doesn't want kids atm, as he can barely support himself and you.

waiting up for you to get home no matter how tired he is

wants to make sure you're home safe

rlly co dependent directly following the trap. can't be in the bathroom by myself, it reminds him too much of the trap. he needs you to be in the room with you while you speak to him through the curtain, or even better, being in the shower with you.

needs constant reassurance he isnt a burden on you

he feels like you don't deserve to be with a man who has so many problems

you tell him constantly that you will be there no matter what

holding hands just to remind him of your presence.

calms him down alot more than you expect

if you happen to be late getting home from work, he may partially freak out: thinking you left him finally

you'll find him sobbing on the couch curled in on himself

he's so vulnerable after lawrence left him there

he doesn't know that lawrence didn't break his promise intentionally so he holds alot of resentment for him

kissing his cheeks and telling him you'll never leave

onto more happy things:

MOVIE NIGHTS!!! you religiously watch movies together and spend most of the time talking about the stupidity of the characters or something.

never meeting his parents bc he's not on good terms with them

LOVES THAT YOURE ABOUT HIS HEIGHT, he's not a tall man and has never been insecure about his height, but the fact he's eye level with you makes it extremely intimate in his opinion

or if you're taller than him, his man brain goes ooga booga and thinks "tall woman/man" and all bets are off

NSFW

okay, to go ahead and put this glaringly obvious thing out there: HE HAS A THING FOR BEING A SUB!!!

He needs you to take control and tell him what to do

grab him by his hair and shove him in between your legs? yes ma'am

ask him to kneel and eat you out on a hardwood floor? done

he absolutely would do anything for you

he needs reassurance what he's doing is good: and rest assured, it is

he probably is a bit messy, and not very controlled

sloppy licks and desperate sucks are common

same thing for when he's inside you

ragged thrusts and a desperate pace

hes probably desperate bc you havent let him cum the whole session

his cock is probably a bit under average length wise, but good god is his girth something to marvel at

everytime he takes you he stretches you

very skinny man, and once you get your claws into him, he probably gains weight which gives him a cute bit of chub that you love to grab onto while he's thrusting into your hole haphazardly.

its almost like a leash

he absolutely needs direction the first couple times, hes so nervous he's shaking

you ask if he wants to keep going and he nods quickly n says theres nothing he's ever wanted more, but assuming this is following the trap, he absolutely needs someone to tell him what to do

could definitely get off from watching you cum (it's def happened before, his poor red cock hadn't been touched all night beyond the grinding on the bed he's hidden from you while eating you out and seeing your intense pleasure just,, he couldn't hold on anymore)

probably circumcised with a tasteful amount of hair, enough to be cute but not enough to be annoying

his nipples are probably so sensitive and he doesnt even know it, he's never thought to play with them

the first time you brush them he gasps and leaks precum

from then on they become a regular part of your routine when playing with him

PLEASE CALL HIM A GOOD BOY!!!

the first time you do, his head is thrown back in ecstasy from your mouth on his cock, and when you pull up, you tell him to look at you while still stroking his cock, and you say "youre my good boy. cum for me my baby boy."

he immediately cums and is embarrassed for weeks, even with your reassurance that it was the hottest thing you've ever seen

speaking of head, he loves getting it but he absolutely enjoys giving it more

theres something so sexy about being able to lick you to completion

when he gets head, he's so lost in his own pleasure that he forgets to breathe and when he remembers, he takes deep breaths

is so in love with your body

he thinks your the hottest person he's ever seen

would probably want to call you mistress or momma. i dont make the rules

RIDE HIM RN

he loves when you're on top, it makes him feel so helpless

alright so: he definitely wants you to peg him

grip his hands and place them above his head, and shove his head into the mattress

anything

his fav position is with his ass up in the air with his head shoved in a pillow and his cock hanging pitifully untouched. shove your strap into his ass while he begs you to make him cum

grab his face and kiss him while he wails out from the pleasure

shove your tongue down his throat,,, something!!

IN THE ODD OCCASION HE IS FEELING DOMINANT!!

rare

but it happens

he isn't some hard dom who leaves you bruised up

he will take care of you just like he does when he's subbing, but he won't let you order him around

grabs your neck and just holds. not enough to prevent you breathing, but enough for you to know its there

still sloppy either way

with him, aftercare is a must

thing is: you can't leave him alone after he's finished subbing, as it sparks some trigger that brings him back to the bathroom, where, in his mind, lawrence left him to die

you have to take him with you

you found out after he cries out and practically tackles you begging you to not leave and to stay with him and to not abandon him

its alot of rambling, but once you get him to calm down, he is pretty embarrassed, but you understand

you tell him to get up and hold his hand, or hug, while walking to the bathroom

wiping a rag on his oversensitive cock to clean it and seeing his face scrunch up is ur fav thing

you might make him eat his cum out of you to clean you up, but it just depends on how he feels. and it might start up a whole nother round so its a gamble

he probably doesn't fall asleep immediately afterward, and will stay there stroking your hair while you sleep to remind himself you're there, you aren't leaving and you love him

LOTS OF LOVE YOU'S DURING AND AFTER!!

something about you telling him you love him does something: it might be from him feeling useless and like a burden

when he finally sleeps, he's the little spoon and he whispers a quick,"thank you"before nodding off

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS!!! I LOVE ADAM AND SAW AND AND pLS REQUEST SOMETHING!!

[wileys-russo]

would love a flu season part 2 (with grumpy lessi and leah bc you recover but they both get sick)

flu season 2.0 II a.russo & l.williamson

"baby!" you looked up from your phone hearing a tired yell from the bedroom, dropping the device on the kitchen counter and hurrying over. "yeah lessi?" you smiled from the doorway, the blonde sniffling and pointing to the tv.

"can you get me the remote please?" she requested weakly, voice croaky and broken as you nodded, darting in to grab it from on top of the dresser. "here love." you smiled, smoothing her hair away from her sweat dampened forehead and placing the remote on her chest.

"watch something with me?" the girl asked, shuffling over a little and patting the gap. "babe!" before you could even give her an answer you heard another yell from the living room. "i'll come back, find something to watch." you bent down and kissed her forehead affectionately before racing out of the room.

"yeah lee?" you stopped in front of the lounge where your other girlfriend was sprawled out like a starfish, sending her a smile.

"can i have a cold cloth for my head please? i'm boiling." leah groaned, having stripped down to just a pair of shorts and a sports bra but you could still see her body glistening with a thin sheen of sweat.

with a nod you darted back to the kitchen, cracking open the freezer and grabbing out one of the frozen towels you'd stashed away earlier. "here baby." you knelt down on the carpet, gently placing the cold cloth on her forehead as she sighed in relief.

"baby!" you placed a kiss to leahs shoulder blade and shot to your feet, quickly returning to the bedroom. "yeah less?" you asked with an almost pained smile, hovering in the doorway. she didn't say another word, only lifting the covers again and patting the empty space beside her.

"okay." you sighed with a nod moving to lay down with her, sticking your legs out of the covers, immediately overwhelmed with her body heat as your girlfriend wrapped around you, head falling to your chest.

you rubbed circles into her back and tangled your other hand in her hair, feeling her body settle on top of yours as you tried to ignore the way you were very quickly starting to overheat, the taller girl basically a human hot water bottle.

"babe!" no sooner had you started to relax a little did you hear the cry from the living room. "sorry love." you mumbled, nudging for alessia to let go of you as she did so begrudgingly and you slipped out of bed, hurrying back out of the room.

with both of them falling sick right as you'd started to feel better you'd spent the last two days running around like a madwoman trying to cater to their every need, and it was starting to take its toll.

"yeah lee?" you forced a smile, shrugging off your hoodie still hot from cuddling with alessia, tossing it on the back of the lounge. "can you put the ac on?" the blonde grumbled, face hidden beneath the cold cloth covering her face as you strode over to the control panel.

"its on now baby." you leant down and squeezed her leg as she moved to lift the cloth. "come." she forced herself to sit up, patting the space behind her head. "aren't you hot?" you asked with a concerned gaze.

"yeah but i wanna put my head in your lap at least, i miss you." leah pouted, face still ghostly pale as you melted a little at the rare vulnerability from the stern captain, nodding and doing as she asked.

her head now laid in your lap you played gently with her hair at her request, your eyes slipping closed for just a moment, exhaustion beginning to catch up with you.

"baby!"

your head shot back up at the noise, shifting to move leah who grunted and pushed her head back onto your lap. "no, she's had you all day." the defender huffed grumpily, hands latching onto your shorts possessively. "lee, baby-"

"baby!"

"leah, my love i need to make sure she's okay." you sighed, kissing her forehead and gently prying her fingers off of you, moving to stand as her head thumped back to the lounge, ignoring her grumbles.

"yeah less?" you stepped back into the bedroom, ignoring the ache setting into your back and neck. "you left me." the striker frowned grumpily, opening her arms again as you sent her a tired smile, returning into bed with her.

you were laid down for all of two minutes before her stomach grumbled. "do you think you could keep something down baby?" you murmured quietly, thumb tracing her jaw as she nodded. "soup." she yawned, rolling off of you as you nodded and returned to your feet.

you sighed in relief as you darted past a fast asleep leah on the lounge, gently peeling off the now warm cloth from where she'd left it on the coffee table.

careful to keep as quiet as you could you rummaged around the kitchen, grabbing out a pre-made soup and starting to heat it up on the stove. you relished in the brief moment of peace and quiet, closing your eyes and resting your head on your fist.

"babe!" you jolted back awake, leahs head popping up over the lounge as you hurried over. "cloth." she ordered, flopping back down and covering her face with her hand as you obliged, darting back to the freezer.

"baby!"

"two seconds lessi!" you called back, placing the cloth over leahs sweltering forehead. "m'hungry." leah mumbled, eyes still closed. "i'll bring you something in a sec lee." you promised, turning on your heel and running to the bedroom.

"baby!" you arrived to the door right as she shouted again. "i'm here love. you alright?" you asked, slightly out of breath. "kiss." alessia demanded grumpily. you moved to peck her lips a couple times, ignoring her whines for a proper one.

"soup." she gave up and repeated her earlier word. "yes! sorry its coming baby." you promised, pecking her lips one last time and running back to the kitchen. "babe!" you halted in your tracks, spinning on foot.

"yeah lee?" your lips forced a smile. "come back." the captain ordered, patting the space behind her head. "two seconds love." you requested. "you've been spending more time with her than me." the blonde accused with a scowl.

"it would make things so much easier if you were both just together babe, then i wouldn't have to keep running back and forth and all of us could be together." you suggested, somewhat desperately.

"no! all less wants to do is cuddle and suffocate me, i'm dying." leah groaned in disagreement. "i heard that! asshole!" alessia croaked back, voice breaking from the bedroom. "stop yelling please less you'll lose your voice again." you remanded darting off to the kitchen, hissing as the soup had just started to boil over.

"baby!" "babe! "baby!" "babe!" "baby?" "babe?"

"oh fuck!" you swore, grabbing the soup pot with your bare hands to try and move it off the heat, racing to the tap and running the burn under cold water, wincing with each second that passed.

"baby?" "babe?" "baby!" "babe!"

you withheld the urge to scream, yanking your hand away and hastily drying it, your girlfriends refusing to cease their calling out for you as your head began to pound.

"two seconds!" you called back as you grabbed your phone off the counter, racing off to the bathroom and slamming the door shut, sitting down on the toilet lid and hitting dial.

"hi! i'm so sorry to bother you but the girls have both gone down with the flu and i really need some help."

~

knowing support was on its way gave you a sudden second wind, racing around to dish up the soup and giving alessia a bowl, promising to come back and give her a cuddle soon as she'd eaten.

leah had turned her nose up at the soup claiming it was too hot, so you'd thrown together a plain ham sandwich instead which she was taking cautious bites of, the silence of the two of them eating allowing you a brief moment to chug a few glasses of water.

then finally, the door bell went.

"whose that?" leah croaked out after she'd swallowed her sandwich, eyes narrowing as you purposefully refused to answer, knocks sounding now instead.

"whose at the door?" alessia shuffled out of the bedroom with a frown, a blanket wrapped tightly around her like a cocoon, empty bowl in hand.

"babe. who is there?" leah asked, more sternly now as you gave them both a guilty smile and the knocks increased.

"don't hate me. remember, i'm only doing this because i love you and i want you to get well as soon as possible." and with that you opened the front door, the two figures hurrying inside wasting no time fussing around and ordering about the two sick blondes.

"you called our mums!?"

[simp-ly-writes]

Can you do a Spencer x reader sickfic bc I’m sick rn and it’s bothering me :/

Under the Weather

─────── · · A Smosh Sick-Fic

Pairing: Spencer Agnew x gn!Sick!Reader

─ · · TAGS: gender-neutral pronouns, fluff, sick-fic, comfort, mentions of flu.

─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | WORDCOUNT: 767

─ · · A/N: I'm so sorry that you got sick so soon after your birthday 😔 wishing you health hope you are feeling a bit better now though, dear reader! 🫶

─────── · ·

You wanted to die. Not in the literal sense but it did feel like you were. Through your blurry vision you made out some number over one-hundred on the thermometer before burrying yourself back under the covers as a cold chill ran across your hot and acheing skin.

Fuck, I was supposed to go out today, the notification on your phone blaring through your already pounding head as you groan and look for the off switch before going into a concussive sneezing segment.

"Hey, I grabbed some groceries from the store-" your boyfriend, Spencer mentioned opening the bedroom door as you groaned, throwing your phone to the end of the bed so you could cover your face within the pillows.

"Don't come any closer, might get you sick," you warn, throwing up a hand to wave him away like a white flag yet a dip in the bed has your arm falling back down to your side, the hair getting brushed out from your face as you huff back a cough.

"Have you taken your temperature yet? You're really burning up, honey," Spencer speaks more softly now as you press your head into his cold hand in a cat-like fashion. You can hear the actual cats chasing themselves around the apartment in the background as the air condition comes back on with a subtle hum.

"Yeah, came out to a hundred-something," you mumble out from the pillow, "texted in sick, I feel like shit." Spencer hums out, listening to your words as he takes in your state.

"Can I get you anything? Medication, water, tea, soup, juice? Another blanket-" Spencer rambles, looking at you intently for an answer. You knew he was not going to leave without one.

"Some juice would be great, I think I already drank the rest of it last night through, I'm really sorry if I ended up getting you sick last night, Spence," your tone horse as you cough in between breaths, eyes closing and eyebrows pinned together as another wave of pain radiates through your bones, you feel pathetically limp.

"Hey, none of that. If I get sick, I get sick. Let me take care of you," Spencer leans in, kissing your temple and letting out a small sigh to the subconscious smile you try and fight.

"Mmm-kay," you hum out, falling asleep to Spencers soft caress, his fingers scraping against your scalp, fingers gracing your cheek as you fall into a deep sleep from his touch.

─────── · ·

You did not remember when you feel asleep, what time of day it was or even if a month had passed. Your eyes peeled themselves open, your bones cracking with a satisfying stretch and you smile seeing the cats laying by your feet moving slowly to greet your recently awakened state.

"Its good that you ended up sleeping, I got you some more medication from the drug store and those that lausange flavour you like. I'm making soup too if you think you're ready for it?" Spencer comments, leaning against the doorframe as he observes the cats circling around your lap and the way your hair sticks up in all kinds of directions.

"Only if you eat some with me, and watch the new Dropout episode," you bargain to a playful eye-roll that has your heart racing and not from your sickness. "I'll be back, one sec," Spencer mentions, turning back down the hall as you move yourself to a side of the bed and take the next dose of your medication.

Spencer comes back into the room with a tray, two bowls of piping hot soup and and a few slices of bread and fruit sit next to them in a thoughtful display. "Thank you, honey. You really didn't have to do all this, I would've just been fine with canned soup-"

"But I want you to get better, not just be fine," Spencer cut you off with a smile, placing the tray on your lap before crawling over the bed and reaching to take his own bowl in his lap.

"That was kinda cringe," you mention, but by the way you refuse to make eye-contact with him, staring intently at the bowl of soup in front of you. Spencer chuckles, hand reaching over to rest on your thigh as he rubs small circles into the sore muscle.

"You like cringe, we wouldn't be dating otherwise,' Spencer observes. "I guess you are right," and you both chuckle at that before you begin chocking on your soup as Spencer pats down your back.

"I love you, Spence."

"I love you too."

─────── · ·

─ · · A/N: wheres a Spencer when I need one? lol

─ · · SPENCER AGNEW TAGLIST: @lisiliely @missflufffanfics @little-stitious-studios @thejourneyneverendsx @sibsteria @lizzylynch1

[cheollipop]

Hello!! sleepovers fuck yeah i love sleepovers~ firstly CONGRATS on 2k 🥳 the idea of sleepovers makes me feel so soft so my submission would be pure soft loveydovey fluff!! (ot8 ateez ensemble/poly! fem reader)

the idea of (f) reader being sick and unwell and all of the boys scramble to make her feel better and comfort you but it’s also utter chaos because they’re all trying to be the best boyfriend taking care of you! at the end of the day you end up comforting them too and you all end on top of eachother all cuddling watching tv and being affectionate (members that dislike skinship just finding comfort next to everyone)

just picturing them all trying to take care of you in their own way- woo trying to make favourite soup, jongho serenading you quietly, san stroking your hair, seonghwa cleaning you up when you’ve been sick?? like the list goes ON and on for them!! but also them interacting with eachother the competitiveness- the protectiveness acting like you’re dying when it’s literally just a flu 😭

so soft for them🥹

~id also SO be down if some nsfw love making etc was sprinkled or suggested like bathing together and taking care of ALL your needs ygm~

will be bundled up in my blankets all cozy to read your work, hope you enjoy writing it i know i’ll enjoy reading it🥰 mwah

2𝙠 𝙎𝙡𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙩

omg bunnie hello!! you sent me this beautiful ask so now we're on a first-name-basis tyvm (and you get a tag). "my submission would be pure soft loveydovey fluff" you didn't lie!!!! this is so so SO cute omg, and the way I'm coming down with a cold rn too,, the universe practically sat me down and told me to write this or else. ahem. anyway, I won't lie, I was a bit stuck trying to figure out what to write for this one bc the fluff part is so beautifully written as it is;; so you get smut!! and I'm feeling like a little tease, soooo... hehe sorry~ ^^ thank you so much for your kind words!! I really hope you enjoy reading~ mwah <3

pairing: park seonghwa x fem!reader x jung wooyoung

w.c.: 0.7k

tags: smut, fingering (f), praise, some teasing, pet names, soft doms!woohwa, but seonghwa's in charge ^^, and he cares more about your health than what you want ^^

nsfw under cut—minors dni!

Blunt nails scratched at your scalp, shampoo suds slowly making their way down your temple as Seonghwa worked them into your hair. A damp patch spread through the thin pajama bottoms where you’d been leaning back against his thigh, his body propped up at the edge of the porcelain tub. You sank your body further, chin dipping under the warm water with every exhale, a whine on your lips as skilled hands disrupted the bubbles around your crotch.

Kneeling on the tiled floor, Wooyoung worked your cunt under the veil of floral-scented foam, two fingers pumping bathwater into your heated walls while he took in the breathy noises leaving your mouth.

“Something wrong, love?”

Seonghwa’s voice sent a shiver down your spine, walls squeezing around the digits fucking into your g-spot with practiced ease. “Hwa, please.”

“You asked for this, didn't you?” He teased, massaging the spot behind your ears with his thumbs.

“No,” you whimpered, “wanted you to fuck me, please,” you rutted against Wooyoung’s palm, trying to create friction over your clit.

“And he said no,” Wooyoung—head tilted in amusement, his eyes focused on the progressive shifts in your expression—reiterated Seonghwa’s earlier instruction, scoffing at the angry leg kicks creating soapy waves around your immersed figure.

“Darling, you’re sick,” the older man tilted your head upwards to meet your narrowed gaze, leaning down to press a kiss to your heated forehead, lips pausing over your skin before pecking it once more and moving away as he straightened up. “I’ll fuck you nice and full once your fever goes away, how’s that sound?”

An exhaled laugh blew out of Wooyoung’s nose, the effect Seonghwa’s words had on you evident in the tight squeeze around his fingers. You nodded enthusiastically, eyelashes fluttering while he peppered a few more kisses over your temples and nose, only for your attention to be drawn back to the man at your side, head snapping towards him as he began pistoning his fingers into your cunt with restless vigour.

“I’m the one making you feel good, pretty girl, pay attention to me,” Wooyoung cooed, his free hand cupping your face, thumb tenderly caressing the highest point of your cheek while the fingers stuffed within your drenched pussy guided you towards the steep edge of your orgasm.

“Woo, please, ngh- I’m,” your spine arched against the porcelain, the pressure in your lower belly growing hastily and your pussy leaking hot slick into the tepid water.

“Come on, darling, show me how hard you’re gonna come on Youngie’s fingers,” Seonghwa’s honeyed tone reverberated in your ear, delicate hands kneading into your tense shoulders.

Your hips lifted off the tub to meet Wooyoung’s thrusts, his fast-paced rhythm shifting to deliberate glides of his fingertips over your sensitive gland, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as your orgasm crashed through you, your body floating off the edge while Wooyoung guided you through it with mumbled praise. Plush lips planting kisses over your damp skin, a warm stream of water washing the floral shampoo out of your hair while you spasmed under the two men’s touch. Your voice—hoarse and broken—echoed between the tiles, persistent fingers languidly stroking your walls as you came down from a mind-numbing high, reaching between your quivering legs to paw at them until they left you stretched out and empty, clenching around nothing.

It took you a few moments to take in your present state, to register the deep breaths in the steamy room as your own, to feel the rough washcloth wiping off the layer of sweat glimmering over your skin, another set of hands kneading the flesh at your hips to ease the trembles shaking your figure. You sighed as you relaxed back into the hard surface behind you, eyes only fluttering open when Seonghwa broke the comfortable silence, lips parted and hand loosely clutching the cloth near your breast, the hard length of his cock throbbing against the back of your head.

“My good girl,” he smiled, eyes brimming with lust as he took in your limp, fucked-out form. “‘Gonna get better quickly, or will I have to fuck you back to health?”

[johnnycakesswitch]

welcoming cold/flu season with a violent cold let’s goooo

but i read a fic a while back about pony not telling darry he was sick and still going to school cause he didn’t want to be an inconvenience but also because he thought darry would tell him to stick it out and it kind of breaks darrys heart a little that his little brother would think that and darry ends up having to pick pony up anyway and I stand by this idea it’s so good

but also consider, soda having to go get pony if darry is like too far away with work that day or something

Yesss I’ve actually written a fic about this that idk if I’ll put out ever but it’s such a good concept. Pony would feel so guilty and anxious about Darry having to come pick him up but it’s literally for no reason because to Darry, that’s his baby brother, of course he’s gonna drop everything to take care of him. When he does get to the school, his heart breaks because Pony looks so small and miserable and because the first thing he did was apologize :( Darry tells him he’s got nothing to be sorry for and takes him home and gets him tucked in bed so he can sleep. Even though he’s sick, Pony feels so much better knowing that Darry isn’t upset with him and it actually makes him feel a lot closer to his oldest brother :(((

Now if Soda had to pick Pony up, he’s literally like Darry on steroids bc Pony is literally his baby and he coddles tf out of him. He’ll pick him up and take him home and just dotes on him the whole time, which Pony likes most of the time but sometimes he’s just like damn I’m tryna sleep bc at the end of the day he is a moody 14 year old. Soda is a very nurturing person at his core and a lot more tactile than anyone else, so he’s the one laying in bed with Pony, stroking his hair, rubbing his back and tummy, etc

In Pony’s perfect world, he secretly wants both of his brothers home to take care of him because it just makes him feel so much better to have them home and know where everyone is when he doesn’t feel good and because they both take care of him in different ways

[callsignfangs]

I know you have something to say about Farah.

Do it.

You know you want to. 😊😉

You lot know me so well 💔💔

Giggles but actually, I’m sorry for randomly vanishing, long story short ive been dealing w some personal stuff and been hesitant to start posting again bc it might be a bit on n off lol. But most things have chilled out a little bit, so i might dip my head back into writing 😇

Also, bc of my amazing luck, I literally got sick, like, today. Sooo, have my fever-induced Farah rambles 😻 Brought to you by. Idk probably the flu or something 💪

Note: the fact i managed to dump this all out in one session before napping is a lil funny ngl 😇

Double note: I acc had a different plan for this, but the sickness has unfortunately taken me, and I’m just going with the flow atp 😇 prepare for more of my Farah braindumps after i’m mildly more alive 😚

-

Farah & Sick!reader drabble 😚

(Tws: vague sickness, fever 👍)

Lets start this off with the simple fact that- she’s the queen of home remedies. You could pick up some degenerative alien disease from a far off solar system, and she probably has something for it. Mot to mention that she’s pretty good at making said remedies notably more appealing, which definitely doesn’t hurt. Sure, she won’t shy away from medicating you, more than prepared to deal with your slightly high shenanigans, but it’s definitely nice to not be drugged up instantly.

She’s also absolutely attached to you at the hip. It’s like she’s given herself the job of your personal nurse, or something. Of course, she’s doing what’s best for you, but she folds just a little at the sight of your soft, weepy eyes.

Admittedly, she’s not the best cook on the planet. She has more important responsibilities than learning to cook. However, for you? She digs up every family recipe she could find, probably digging up an old scrapbook or two of her grandparent’s meanwhile. She’s determined to shower you in gourmet-level food as much as humanly possible, even if that means constantly ducking out of the kitchen to check on you, cuddled up on the couch.

Speaking of cuddles, she’s an absolute cuddle monster. The second you’ll let her, she’s buried alongside you, her gentle warmth dissolving into tour achy muscles, your pounding head showered in soft little kisses - even a couple on the lips, if she can sneak them, because, no, love, she doesn’t care about getting sick, she’ll live.

And, of course, she’ll insist on a nice bath with you, seeing as she just wants to see you better, sweetheart. Her getting to snuggle up with you in the tub is definitely just a happy coincidence.

Bathing with Farah is absolutely heavenly. She fills up the tub herself, happily murmuring pleasant little anecdotes and warm comforts into your ears as lukewarm water splashes around behind you. Gently helping you out of your pyjamas (well, her pyjamas, that were practically yours at this point), she dips her foot into the water, feeling the coolish liquid cover her feet. She slowly eases you in, a slight guilt pooling in her heart as you whine about just how cold the water felt. She keeps you buried in her arms throughout, kissing your cheeks and praising you sweetly, even letting you tuck your face against her shoulder.

Once you’re actually in, the bath is a near-perfect affair. Farah keeps you against her chest the entire time, happily kneading at your pained muscles, letting the water wash away the sweat staining your skin. She guides you down softly, supporting your neck with a gentle, rough hand as she dips your hair into the water, letting it wash away the tightness behind your eyes as best it could, easily tasking herself with washing your hair. It’s like she turns into your personal masseuse, looping a leg around your hips to keep you safely tucked against her, stroking delicately through the soft strands of your hair, loving hands brushing against their perfect spot on your scalp, leaving your muscles at a similar consistency to the water you were surrounded by.

She takes to washing your hair easily, lathering each product in her hands and warmly rubbing them in, pressing kisses to your cheeks and forehead between each one (her face occasionally scrunches as the misplaced product stains her mouth, but it’s worth it to see the little contented smile against your lips).

Thankfully, she doesn’t shy away from care elsewhere, either. She easily lathers each skincare product against your prone form, adjusting you gently against her arms to completely cover every inch of your sweet, delicate skin. Of course, each touch is punctuated with a little massage, hoping to soothe each and every inch of your sickly form, along with her fair share of kisses.

Unsurprisingly, getting out of the tub felt like hell. Sure, the water was mildly cold, but you’d adjusted to it, at this point, lazing easily against Farah’s warmth like a cat in the sun. You definitely felt like a wet cat as she eased you up, shivers immediately picking up the second your skin was exposed to the icy-seeming air. A snug, fluffy towel was wrapped around you almost immediately, with Farah swiftly reaching out to crank the heating up - just enough to keep the temperature difference from making your sickness worse.

Farah was quick to herd you into the bedroom, sitting you down on the bed and exchanging the, now damp, towel for a cosy robe she’d bought a while ago, surprisingly still unused.

And, before you could even consider protesting, she was crouched between your legs, gently towelling down the damp skin. She slowly made her way up, from your feet all the way up to your hair, occasionally popping to and from the bathroom, finishing off your skin and hair care.

By the time she’d finished, you were cuddled up in another - notably lighter - pair of her pyjamas, buried safely on her side of the bed, her honeyed scent filling your senses. Your head was pillowed against her chest, eyes trained vaguely before you as she flicked through her movie catalogue, looking for something peaceful yet entertaining.

Eventually, after her careful deliberation, she decides on some lighthearted romcom. It doesn’t particularly matter at this point, though, seeing as you’d conked out before the opening credits had even begun, your soft, purring snores filling the room and bringing a loving smile to her face. Looking after you so delicately had been amazing, but she was absolutely relieved you were finally getting the sleep your body so desperately needed.

Sighing happily, she lays the two of you down, snuggling beneath the covers and kissing you goodnight, easily falling into slumber in her favourite place - cuddled up beside you.

[x-0ophelia0-x]

Could you write something about rebels era Ezra taking care of a sick reader on the ghost?? Maybe he chooses to stay behind to watch after her, bring her water and snacks, and wrap her in warm blankets when she gets the chills? I’m currently sick in bed with the flu and this would def cheer me up! I also hope your exams go well!

thank you so much! I have a feeling that they went well :D

Also, I hope that you‘re feeling better now 🫶🏻

Your perfect caretaker.

pairing: Fem!Reader x Ezra Bridger

warnings: none! word count: 1,5k

summary: You learnt your lesson the hard way. Now you were sick. A special someone decides to take care of you, bringing you the joy you needed since your day started off with a strong headache.

authors note: Another Ezra x Reader story! I hope you like it!! Feels so good to be back again 😭 I hope that my grammar here makes sense bc this was written after midnight 💀

enjoyyy <3

How did it come to this point?

Okay well… you knew how since it was somehow… basically… your own fault but still. Why?!

It all started with a mission on a icy planet, and you knew that it was going to be cold there. However, ignoring your crews warnings, you decided to not take the old coat Hera was offering to you. You didn’t find yours and you sure as hell wouldn’t wear that old thing… no. It smelled nasty because the last time someone wore it was when the same thing had happened to Zeb. 

And this smell of his just wouldn’t let itself be eradicated from this coat.

You did what you thought was the best for your nose and since you wouldn’t stay outside for too long you just went out without it. 

Which was a mistake, a huge one. 

Now you‘re lying on your bed, your head throbbing, feeling kind of lightheaded and your throat felt like as if it‘d burst any second. 

You were sick. 

The others didn’t know it yet. The mission was yesterday and the symptoms appeared when you woke up. Or they woke you up. You were burning up, that fever sure had it‘s effect on you. 

There was one problem though. You had a mission today and you couldn’t let this pass. Ignoring your body’s signals to stay in your bed, you stood up, instantly regretting it as everything started to turn black from the sudden movement. 

Your nearby desk was your source of balance as you reached out for it to not fall down. You underestimated your condition by a lot, there’s no way that you’d be able to fulfill the mission while you couldn’t even keep your balance while you stood.

A sudden knock on your cabin door threw you off of your thoughts, accompanied by Heras voice.

„y/n? Are you alright? Did you oversleep?“

Oversleep?

Wait… which time is it anyway??

You looked at your clock and realized that you indeed overslept.. well…. no wonder. 

„Sorry! I ove-“

The answer was cut short when your dry throat started it’s Protest. It didn’t only hurt but it was also itchy as hell, the coughing that took over your response was louder than Zeb‘s snoring. 

„y/n? I‘ll come in!“

With a familiar sound the door flung open, revealing Heras worried face.

„Oh.. you‘re so pale“

Her mother instincts kicked in and she couldn’t just stand by and watch. 

She quickly grabbed a bottle of water to give it to you so that you could somehow ease the itchiness of your throat. 

„Seems like you‘re sick.. should‘ve worn that coat from yesterday huh?“

There was a quiet chuckle following after this.

„Seems like it.. thanks for the water“

Hera made her way closer to you, holding you by your shoulders as she moved you back to your bed.

Her touch was gentle as she laid you down, placing her hand on your temple.

„What are you doing?“

Talking did hurt but it didn’t matter.. did she forget about the mission?

„What I am doing? The question is what the hell you were doing? You‘re burning up, you need to rest“

Just when you wanted to, for once again, push your body to it‘s limits, you heard another knock on your door. Followed by a voice.

„Hey uhm.. I was passing by and.. may have heard one or two things..“

It was Ezra and he sounded worried. 

„Your timing couldn’t be better.. y/n is sick and I need you to help me to find someone to look after her while we‘re on the mission“

„Hera please you do-“

„I can do it“

Ezra responded almost immediately.

„Ezra.. you’re supposed to fly with us“

„y/n too.. I won’t let her alone, especially not like this“

This kind of warmed up your heart, he‘s been through a lot already.. seeing him wanting to stay behind just to make sure that you‘re alright hit a spot.

And Hera had a proud mother moment, how could she say no to his offer?

„Alright then.. call us if something happens“

„Ai Captain“

Hera left your cabin, leaving you and Ezra alone.

He walked closer to you, also placing his hand on your temple to check your temperature. 

„Karabast.. you‘re hotter then ever“

This made you chuckle, Ezra knew how to light your mood up and he definitely knew how to let you forget about your headache, even if it‘s just for a small moment.

„I‘ll take this as an compliment sir“

„Sir? How bad is the fever?“

„ Ha Ha“

Moments like this.. they were everything.

However, your fever was still there and it‘s effects got worser after each passing moment. 

„Ezra.. could you bring me the medication please.. my head.. my throat…it‘s killing me“

The blue haired spaceboy nodded before he left your cabin to return a few minutes later.

He didn’t only bring the medicine you asked him for. There was much more.

A thick and surely warm blanket, some wet towel, water and snacks were among the medicine. 

„Ezra….“

„No no no, less talking, more resting“

He placed the medicine on your desk as he took out a spoon to let the drops fall on it. After he had dropped enough, he took the wet towel with bis other hand and walked to your side.

„Please make aaaa“

His expression while saying it was priceless, you did as he said and opened your mouth for him to move the spoon inside, helping you to take the medicine in. 

Ezra moved the spoon out when he saw you swallow the not so tasty liquid, placing the spoon somewhere next to your bed while he took the towel out.

„You should feel better anytime soon… however.. this should help you for the meantime“

He carefully placed the towel on your temple, it’s coolness immediately showing some kind of effects against the heat and the headache.

„Did you eat something?“

„No.. I overslept“

„Hmm okay.. seems like the patient‘s hungry“

„Patient?“

He nodded.

„Since when are you a doctor?“

„Since today, you know.. doctor Bridger has to help his friend“

„I‘m feeling honored“

„As you should“

It is hard to describe but when you woke up.. you felt like shit. Like literally.

The only thing you could focus on was your discomfort, nothing else. 

Ezra barely came in and your mood already became way better compared to how it was earlier.

Speaking of him, he took out some snacks and held them up.

„Which one would you like for now?“

Your morning continued exactly like this. Ezra made sure that you laid comfortable in your bed while he sat down to keep an eye on you.

The medication helped but it didn’t help you against the cold.

Of corse you had to also get the chills..

Your trembling body caught Ezra‘s attention. He stood up and grabbed the thick blanket, he made his way back to you and put it carefully over your body.

„Here.. let me help you“

You were tired to say the least, rest was something that you needed the most right now.. Ezra just saved you with this blanket.

„thank you..“

Your voice was quiet and somehow hoarse but he heard you. 

„I‘ll do it as many times as you need me to do it.. you don’t need to thank me for this you know“

„I know… but…“

„But?“

Ezra held your hand, reassuring you that he was listening.

„I don’t want to infect you… you should know this as an doctor mister Bridger?“

He chuckled a bit too hard on this one.

„Don‘t worry y/n, your favorite doctor is fully aware of this“

This boy just somehow always managed to get you to smile.

„Now that‘s the y/n I know!“

„Yeah but I‘m… kinda tired“

„Perfect, your body needs this“

A yawn escaped you, you closed your eyes and let the sleep take over, still feeling his hand holding yours. 

„Sweet dreams.. I‘m still here for you until you wake up“

You only understood the beginning, thanking him when you drove off to your long awaited, and most importantly, stressless slumber.

-

The others returned from the mission and Hera and Kanan immediately made their way towards your cabin to check on you. 

They were greeted with a heartwarming sight when they opened your door.

You were asleep, cuddled up in Ezra’s blanket. Ezra at the other hand had moved the chair closer to your bed, he was sitting there, also fast asleep, his and your hand still holding on to the other. 

„They‘re adorable“

Heras voice was so high that it even took Kanan by surprise. 

„We should check later on them again.. let them sleep for now“

„You’re right but before that..,“

She told him to stay there when she ran off, returning with another blanket.

„You want to join them?“

„No silly, it‘s for our little caretaker“

Careful not to wake you two up, she walked towards you, putting the blanket over Ezra’s sleeping form. Hera came back to Kanan, satisfied with her action.

„Now we can leave“

[deldeldel90]

traitor Blaine au where he was always worse but in a wet cat sort of way. greyden vibes, where he's just like really mentally ill and just. Going Through It.

so he runs away after the final battle, lives in destitute, doesn't take care of himself AT ALL. he's basically just stewing in his own failures, becoming unhinged and generally unwell, doesn't sleep, doing Really Bad.

and he's trying to come up with a plan. to get revenge, because like,, he's lost everything. he's lost Father, and he still hasn't uncovered how much abuse his dad put on him bc he has zero (0) emotional awareness. he's coming up with revenge because it's the only thing that's keeping him stable and keeping him from absolutely breaking into a million pieces.

so… after a few months of planning, and not taking care of himself, becoming sick every few days and forgetting to eat and not sleeping, he has the Perfect idea. he pretends to be helpless in order to sneak into their club.

(he is helpless, but not like he’ll ever admit that.)

“i don't have a curse,” he tells them, pretending to be ashen-faced. there's blood on his fist from where he had to work his ass off in order to get a meal. it was the first one he'd eaten in about three days. “but.. i heard this place can help for more than that. is it okay if I…” he feels his throat stir. “if I can-” he stumbles over his words. his face burns in very real embarrassment.

“of course you can join,” prez says immediately. she takes his hands, cold to the touch, and puts them into her warm ones. “let's get you inside. you're all damp.”

blaine doesn't own anything better than about two pairs of outfits and a raggedy cloak. he doesn't have anything. everybody hates him, after all. he doesn't want anything. he just needs revenge.

this is what he needs… to make Father proud. to be loved again.

he tries to pry into their secrets. they force him to eat a hot meal instead. he tries to get curtis to tell him where he keeps different keys. curtis insists he gets a bath first—”and wash your hair,” he says, kindly, offering to help him do it, if he's unable to do it on his own.

“i’m fine,” blaine hisses, wondering why everyone's being so… nice to him. he ends up needing the help for his hair. his body feels so weak. his sharp mind has fog all around it.

“do you have the flu or something…?” syrah demands to know, rolling her eyes as she sets up a board game in blaine’s makeshift bedroom. “c'mon. this game’s called ‘fashion roll-two’. saff and abbi are getting the snacks.”

and more instances like this. they keep taking care of him, he keeps trying to get information and sabotage them. it won't stop.

blaine does not understand what's going on.

the cpc smile at him at every breakfast and offer him more of those sugary waffles.

here's the twist: THEY KNOW BLAINE IS LYING!!!! they know he's a trickster little bunny rabbit!!! a snake. a thieving cat, if you will. they know it all. they just see him and go, “damn bitch you live like this?”

but they see him– hurting, actively in pain, destroying himself, all while trying to hide it under a mask of pure hatred. but he cares too much.

(he always has.)

he teaches abbi the way of the sword- from what little he knows. he paints makeup onto syrah's face. he paints flower pots and gardens with saffron. he reads poetry with prez on the quiet nights. he helps curtis with the cleaning whenever he can. he plays requested songs at the piano for the club during the days where it's raining too hard outside to spend it by the campfire. he remembers all the names of the girls nobody else really looks to. he gives gwen his jacket after she made a mess of herself in the kitchen and can't help but understand why she's everyone’s little sister. aurelia and him have cat fights but he looks out for the younger girl, making sure her food is always chilled.

he tries to take revenge. tries to keep a distance and make himself hateable, tries to keep others away from him. tries to self destruct.

but they don't let him.

au name: “to befriend an enemy” or something like that :3

[banes-favourite]

How often do you think Gortash got sick(as in caught a cold or flu or something) as a child? Did his parents treat him the same as they would any other day or were they a bit less harsh or even possibly more harsh on him when he was sick?

Do you think he ever had the misfortune of getting sick while in the House of Hope? I imagine there's also the possibility of him getting sick while in the House of Hope due to a wound getting infected while it was healing since the cells don't look like they'd be kept that clean

Also just as a bonus durgetash thing: Imagine Gortash getting sick during the time he was working with Durge, and Durge attempts to take care of him. Maybe even going as far as making him something like some sort of dwarf-meat stew to attempt to get him to eat(I specified dwarf meat because in-game it seems to be mentioned as Durge's favourite, and it's just kind of cute to imagine Durge trying to feed Gortash something made using their favourite food in order to make him feel better). No idea if Gortash would willingly eat it, but maybe Durge doesn't tell him what's in it until afterwards or he's either sick enough or feels so touched by the effort Durge put in that he eats it even if normally he wouldn't want to

(cw for injury)

Hmm I think he would have been a relatively sickly child tbh, and his parents would do the bare minimum to help just so they wouldn't lose the help around the shop. Once he gets older though, he learns not to bother them when it happens because all he'll get is yelled at for 'allowing himself to get sick in the first place' so he just learns to tough it out. It does strengthen his immune system tho.

But you're right, I imagine although they mostly inflicted brute force type abuse on him, there were quite a lot of open wounds on his body, especially his face. One of them was bound to get infected eventually because yeah I doubt the slaves' personal hygiene was a priority. I think he got sick from them like twice during his time there, the first time wasn't quite so bad, a cut on his cheek got infected and he was swollen like a squirrel for like a week. Thankfully he got over that one on his own.

But it's hard to imagine he was always lucky. I think the second time would have happened when he was around 13 and it got bad. Nubaldin thought it funny to test a new knife on him and he cut a pretty big gash on his leg. It definitely needed stitches so Gortash managed to do them himself with some rusty ass needle and thread he found and honestly if he hadn't, his muscles would have stretched out dangerously just from his walking around. Obviously though the wound got infected so badly that only a few days later he was feeling tired, throwing up, couldn't breathe or speak or get out of bed. He developed sepsis and spent like two full days unable to do anything but rot helplessly in his cell, skin pale as fuck, cold to the touch even if he was in literal Avernus, fighting for his very life. Honestly if Raphael hadn't found him and healed him, he would have died. (adding to his twisted view of his abuser bc he was soo grateful to him). After that he took extra care of his open wounds.

I love the durgetash idea, your brain is huge. Durge 100% would make him a dwarf soup just to laugh at his expression when he told him afterwards. Unfortunately for him, a very sick and tired-of-his-shit Gortash would just thank him and comment that it wasn't as bad as he'd thought. Then Durge would tell him to fuck off as he drapes a blanket over him and brings him a hot coffee and threatens to gut him if he doesn't get at least 7 hours of sleep.

[grapecaseschoices]

Happy New Year! 💥 and 🪩 from the ask?

Happy New Year, hun! :-)

writing ask

💥Is there a chapter, scene, or WIP you're most excited to write? Share a snippet or tell us about it!

Not. Really. This year is mostly for the 'getting back on the saddle' BUT as I mentioned here, there are some ideas I would like to one day [maybe even this year, if things work much better than planned] I would like to make into .... something. I had this concept for an IF where the MC is late 20s/early 30s [if I remember correctly], and they end up not living up to their parents' desires for their life. It was going to be called 'Unbelieved' bc it was like an urban fantasy -- so like tales that aren't ~believed in~ any more but it was also about MC and the ROs trying to find themselves again after disappointment in family/love/a number of other things. If I do it, it probably WON'T be an IF. LMAO. I don't know that I have the guts [or the brain -- power or skills lol] to do an IF. But I still putt around a couple of the characters in my head. So maybe I'll put them in something else, or bring them elsewhere. I guess it is fine to share a snippet bc I dont have enough attachment with it to feel THAT embarrassed. So here is a snippet of an early 'chapter' I wrote like almost 3 yrs ago:

It usually starts like this. Bad news, that is. For you, bad news almost always starts like this -- it starts with a letter. 

You come home from a late day at the offices. The majority of staff had called out sick today: from Janice, the office secretary, to your boss to even two of the janitors. You’ve been working at the office for almost three months and Tom, the head janitor, is always there from six am to six pm, five days a week. (*Thought; could be a fun personality choice -- how does MC know Tom’s name? Bc they’re observant? Bc they’re friendly? Bc they were forced to know d/t an office party celebrating Tom’s bday and they’re surprised they remember. Choice could be ‘you’ve never seen him take a day off’ ‘he told you he never took a day off’ ‘apparently’)

It was strange. However, you hadn’t thought anything much about it. (At least, not at first.) The weather is changing. If it wasn’t the flu, it was probably allergies, or a cold. Or maybe they were playing hooky. You had a lot on your plate today. The hours before and after lunch had really given a new meaning to all hands on deck. You had never realized just many clients trafficked through your small [dentist/law/medical/engineering/etc] office on a Thursday. 

That fact didn’t leave much time for gossiping around the watercooler, speculating on your coworkers health status. (Choice: ‘As much you might have wanted to’, ‘Not that you would’ve wanted to anyway’) 

You didn’t start thinking about the strangeness until you began flipping through the mail. 

Garbage. Garbage. Garbage. Coupon. Garbage. Huh …. Ms. Hutchinson’s daughter was having a garage sale? Interesting. Garbage. Promotional. Coupon. Garbage. Letter from your great-uncle’s lawyer. Garbage. Gar -- 

Wait.

It feels as if your entire body prickles; like shocks of static are aligning against your skin or that time your roommate in college attempted acupuncture on you (but thankfully you didn’t come off scarred forever). It feels wrong, your body. It feels  -- <i>tight</i>. It might have something to do with the way your heart seems to have sunk into your stomach and your breath seems to have caught in your throat. 

🪩 Do you have any "good" writing habits you want to cultivate?

To have good writing habits you need to be a good writer. Hhaha. No I'm trying to stop those kind of thhoughts .... yet I also couldn't resist. *when youre mean to yourself but also funny*

Hmm. I don't know! I think always being open to getting inspiration from anything is a good habit? Whether from a show or a gifset or random people I saw in the streets. I used to have whole notebooks filled with names that I liked .... I don't know where it is. But it is probably why I have the weirdest [~most unique~] names for my characters lol, because those I don't have the notebooks anymore I still have the websites.

I am really big -- though not as much on outlines anymore. Usually for just characters I chat about, I like to visualize them so pinboards and/or moodboards are almost always a must. But when I get into writing, I really like to delve into their heads. Whether it be assigning MBTIs and looking into how their bg might change how they grow up and interact with things etc, even with that set 'mbti framework' or doing those g2ky character asks but by myself lool.

So I suppose I would like to go back to like monitoring people ... haha that sound creepy. But maybe more observant of those around me and their habits and ticks, so I have more to pull from when building characters. Does this count? IDK.

[grayskies2525]

An Admirable Denial |M/M| Part 6

Word Count: 5,847

Link to all parts: An Admirable Denial (14 parts)

The next morning, Connor is feeling great. “Great” might not be the perfect descriptor for how he’s feeling, but compared to the state he was in yesterday… Great is certainly sufficient enough. 

He’d spent the entirety of the day before —after the disastrous book signing — in bed. He slept nine consecutive hours until he woke up at 1:00 am. In a daze, he warmed up a can of chicken soup, took some ibuprofen, and changed into pajamas. By 2:00 am he was back in bed and fast asleep.

After nearly sixteen hours of sleep, he feels refreshed and finally capable of having coherent thoughts. He’s able to enjoy his coffee now that some of his ability to taste and smell has returned. He grabs a tissue from the box on the kitchen table and blows his slightly congested nose. The nose blow is satisfying, and he’s able to finally breathe, somewhat, which is a vast improvement from the day before when blowing his nose did nothing to relieve the congestion whatsoever. He eats some oatmeal with plenty of berries, as well as some Greek yogurt and a banana. He smiles as he thinks about how much better he feels. He now just feels like he has a very mild cold, which he’s more than capable of managing. He knew his trusty immune system wouldn’t disappoint him. 

He remembers his plans for the day and sighs in relief as he realizes he’s actually well enough to go. He was going to go, regardless, but now things will be much easier. He pulls out his phone to text Felix.

Connor: Good morning. Still off from work?

Connor only has to wait a couple of minutes before a response. 

Felix: Uh yeah. I was going to be off anyway because I needed to use my PTO. But also, everyone is still off the whole week bc of the flu running rampant.    Connor: That’s good. Just wanted to check. We can leave in a couple hours.

Felix: Um….?? Leave?? 

Connor frowns at his phone. They’d discussed this the other day, hadn’t they? How Connor had a surprise for Felix. 

Connor: For the thing I was telling you about the other day. 

Felix: Um, Connor, do you have amnesia?? You’re just going to pretend yesterday didn’t happen? 

Connor stares at his phone with knitted brows. What happened yesterday? He knows he had the book signing and that it was awful and that Felix was there, but… He’s realizing now he must have been running quite the fever yesterday because trying to recall the details from the event feels like trying to recall a dream. He thinks he’s close for one moment, and then everything slips away. He remembers Felix being… not happy with him. But he doesn’t remember any yelling or anything awful said that would leave him to think they were in an argument. 

Connor: Uh… maybe. Because I barely remember the signing yesterday, if I’m being honest. Did I say something to make you mad?

Connor: I think I remember now that you were upset and left looking sad. I’m really sorry. I’ll be honest I don’t know what I’m sorry FOR but I’m sure I said something really stupid or something.

Felix: Oh my god, Connor…. I’m just… you really don’t remember?? I didn’t realize you were that out of it. Surprised you made it home tbh. I’m calling you.

Connor smothers a few coughs in his elbows, but picks up the phone after the third ring.

“Um hey,” Connor says, hesitantly, his voice still slightly raspy. “Can you please tell me what dumb thing I did? I mean, I remember being mad at you because I told you not to come, but …” Connor rubs the center of his forehead, where a dull ache still resides, as he tries to think. “And then, honestly, all I remember is just wanting to sit down, which I did. So I could finish signing books. Um, I guess… I think I had a cold and it hit me kind of hard at the signing,” he says, hating admitting to Felix about any kind of sickness, but he doesn’t know how to navigate the conversation, otherwise.

There’s a long pause.

“You… You think you had a cold? You guess? Connor, I was there for two minutes and could tell you were burning up with a fever.’ Felix stops and lets out a long sigh. “Okay, you know what? I should have known better than to get upset with you yesterday. You obviously weren’t thinking clearly and it hadn’t been right to try to start a serious conversation. That’s on me.”

Connor stays silent because he has no idea what he can say in this situation.

“Listen, how are you feeling today?” Felix finally asks.

“I’m fine,” Connor says. “Feeling a little stuffy I guess, but I crashed as soon as I got home yesterday and am really just now getting up. Just ate some oatmeal and yogurt… I’m feeling good.”

“You do sound better,” Felix starts, sounding hesitant. “I guess all that sleep did you good. But, still, you should take it easy today.”

Of course, this is the moment a powerful tickle decided to invade his sinuses. He jerks his head to the side, sneezing uncovered — “Hep-shiew!” — and grimacing as the spray hits the refrigerator door.

“Your sneezes sound better, too,” Felix says.

“I forgot you paid attention to my sneezes,” Connor says, letting out a light laugh. “What did you call them? Cute?” Connor teases.

Connor can’t see Felix’s blush through the phone, but somehow he still knows it’s there. “Uh, yes. It’s a little cute when you sneeze,” Felix admits. “But, anyway, my point is they sound better — more normal, I mean.”

Connor smiles. “Yes, of course they do, because — like I said — I’m feeling a lot better today. A little cold is no match against my immune system.”

Felix sighs, but Connor thinks he hears a laugh mixed in with it. “I don’t think it was a little anything. But, yeah, I’ll admit you seem a lot better. But… listen, I know you don’t remember much about the signing yesterday. You remember, though, that you’ve been acting kind of strangely lately, right? I mean, at first, I thought it was your way of, I don’t know… running away again, I guess? Like, you were slowly drifting away from me? Then I saw you yesterday and thought, well, that maybe you weren’t comfortable with me seeing you sick… which, Connor, I’ll admit, is also a problem. I guess what I’m trying to say is, we just… We have a lot to talk about.”

Connor’s heart starts to race and he pauses a moment to consider his response. “I understand why you feel upset, and I agree that we should talk. But, I did make plans today, and I was hoping we could maybe do those first? And, then, talk after?” he asks, hopefully. Then he brings his arm up to catch a light sneeze.

There’s another long pause, which seems to be a developing pattern.   “Can the plan maybe be watching movies and, I don’t know… eating ramen?” Felix asks, uncertainty lacing his voice.

Connor rolls his eyes even though Felix can’t see him. “I’ve had this planned for a while. Believe me, it’s a lot better than movies and ramen, Felix.”

Felix sighs again. “I love that you’ve obviously planned something for me. And I know you’re feeling better, but.… Listen, you looked pretty rough yesterday. And, I really don’t want you to push yourself.”

“Felix, I promise, it will all be fine. I’m doing this for you, and… I really want to, okay? I’m excited to do this with you. I know you were worried when I brought up that we should take things a little slower. And I want to prove to you I am committed.”

“Connor,” Felix says, softness finally returning to his voice. “There’s other ways you can show me you’re committed. I mean you could just —” Felix’s voice tapers off, and Connor wonders what he was going to say, but before he can ask Felix continues. “Forget it. We’ll talk about it later. Just… you don’t have to do some kind of grand gesture.”

Connor laughs, which tickles his throat slightly, making him want to cough, but he resists. “It’s hardly a grand gesture, sweetheart. It’s just something I think you’ll like, and I… I don’t know. I want to see you happy, okay? You looked so sad yesterday, and I hate that. Please let me do something to make you smile, today. Please,” Connor says, putting forth his best attempt to beg. Connor feels a bit of a weight lift when he hears Felix laugh.

 “How am I supposed to resist that?” Felix asks, voice soft. “It’s just….” he starts, a more sobering tone entering his voice. “I worry if you start feeling sick, you won’t tell me.”   Felix is definitely correct on this presumption, but Connor’s obviously not going to let him know that — especially since the matter is entirely irrelevant, since he is feeling better. “Felix, you don’t have to worry about me feeling sick.”

Felix sighs, once again. “That’s kind of what I mean, Connor. Just please agree if you start feeling bad, you’ll let me know? Please, Connor? It’s really important to me that you promise this to me.”

Connor frowns, feeling an unease settle in his stomach. How could he promise that? But, it’s not like it’s going to matter, anyway.

He hesitates before responding. “Yes, Felix. I promise. If I feel bad, I’ll let you know.”

“Thank you,” Felix says, sounding so relieved that Connor feels a surge of guilt.

_____

Connor has been driving two hours and his eyelids are starting to feel heavy. He slept for sixteen hours. How could he possibly be tired again already? His nose has also been running on and off during the drive. Felix brought an entire box of tissues with him, which made Connor roll his eyes, but he’s feeling a kind of… relief, he decides, that Felix knows he’s sick now. Connor has been wiping his nose every few minutes during the drive, and Felix hasn’t said anything or acted in a way that causes Connor to suspect Felix is repulsed by the situation. 

“Hap-t’choo! Hap-t’choo! Hap-t’choo!” Connor releases the three light sneezes into the tissues he’s been grasping in one hand while his other hand maneuvers the steering wheel. 

“Bless you, bless you, bless you!” Felix says, imitating the way the sneezes sounded.

Connor laughs while rolling his eyes. “Don’t do that, oh my god. It’s embarrassing.”

“Blessing you is embarrassing?” Felix asks, sounding astonished.

“No, not the blessing me… though now that I think about it, it is a weird thing to do, isn’t it? I mean, we’re not even religious. But I digress. Anyway, the embarrassing part is you mocking how my sneezes sound,” he says, keeping his eyes on the road with his used tissues still firmly grasped in his hand. 

“Hmm,” Felix hums. “Okay, noted. No more sneeze mocking. How’s your cold? You’re getting pretty sneezy there, babe,” Felix says, tone light.

Connor’s, in all honesty, is starting to feel less-than-great — mostly due to how tired he is. Felix’s earlier idea of movies and ramen is sounding better as time goes on, though he suspects he’d fall asleep the instant he started the movie. Also, what had started out as a light tickle in his throat that morning, has turned into an almost incessant urge to cough. He’s done well at suppressing them, mostly, but can’t avoid a light cough here and there. His instinct tells him to say “I’m fine,” but… he did promise Felix he’d tell him if he felt sick. It’s not that he feels sick — he feels that word should be reserved to how he felt yesterday — but there’s still a voice telling him that saying he’s fine would be a lie. And Felix deserves better than being lied to.

“It’s uh,” Connor starts, unsure of the words to use, which is uncharacteristic of him. Felix always has been able to rattle him in a way no one else could. “It’s kind of still there, I guess,” he settles on. “But I don’t feel bad. Just like I’m in the process of recovering, you know? I’m sure I’ll have this thing completely kicked by tomorrow.”

Connor takes his eyes off the road for a fleeting moment to meet Felix’s gaze. Felix is wearing that sad expression Connor remembers from yesterday. He looks back at the road, knitting his brows.

“Connor… I know we said we’d talk about this later. But, I just really have to know why you have such an aversion to admitting even the tiniest amount of weakness. I mean, okay, I get it. You’re a ‘big, strong, man,’ or whatever. I mean, I obviously can’t relate,” Felix says, clearly trying to inject humor into this topic, but Connor still clenches his jaw and feels his mouth tighten. “Like, I know some people don’t like being vulnerable. I get that,” Felix continues. “But, it’s just that I believed you when you said you were committed to rebuilding our relationship — to trusting that what we have matters. But, well, it’s hard to believe you when you refuse to let me in. I mean, Connor….”

Felix trails off, clearly trying to choose his words carefully. Connor has to push down the natural impulse to tell Felix to drop it, that Connor’s “fine” and that Felix is being ridiculous. He also knows, though, that dismissing Felix’s feelings would not be a smart action to take. “I knew you weren’t feeling well that night we had dinner. Your voice sounded like shit,” Felix says, then laughs at his choice of words. “I mean, no offense, but it just did — like the way people sound when they have a sore throat. And then there was all the sneezing, but when I brought it up, you were immediately so dismissive of there being anything wrong and, I mean, I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, so I let it go. But, babe, you literally could not stop sniffling. I don’t know if you realized it, but it sounded like you were going to drown in your own snot and it kept getting worse as the night went on. But you kept acting like everything was totally fine. You wouldn’t even blow your nose even though it was painfully obvious you needed to.”

Connor’s cheeks feel on fire as he listens. He doesn’t know what to say and his heart is starting to pound. He’s never desired more for a conversation to end than this one. But he also knows saying “Felix, I don’t want to talk about this. Everything you’re saying is wrong. Let’s move on,” will be proving Felix’s entire point, and likely to effectively end their relationship, which he definitely does not want. So he continues clutching the steering wheel with gritted teeth as he listens.

“And, okay, on one hand, I kind of get it. I didn’t especially love you seeing me sick, either. And I tried to deny it, too, at first, because it is a little embarrassing to be sneezy, snotty, and just all around helpless in front of someone. But… that was also before we were back together and it just wasn’t your place anymore to… to care, you know? And even then, I only held up the facade for a super short amount of time. I mean, I literally let you bring me soup and medicine and accepted your offer to spend the night at your house and to sleep in your bed. Even though we were broken up. But you… you  promised to open up to me and communicate how you were feeling and…” Felix stops and sighs. “I’m sorry. I know I’m talking a lot. But, I guess… I guess I want to know if I’m doing something to make you feel so uncomfortable. Because you obviously are — uncomfortable, I mean. It’s obvious that you’re not okay being your full self around me because if you were, you wouldn’t have felt the need to run away to your own apartment instead of just letting me see you sick.”

There’s a long moment where neither says anything, the only sound in the car being the music from the radio, volume turned down low. Connor needs to change lanes, and uses the distraction to stall in his response. Finally, though, he lets out a long, deep sigh.

“I don’t know how,” Connor hears himself say, as he focuses on keeping his voice steady. He knows he should say more, but his body is completely rejecting this conversation; his heart is pounding and his stomach feels sick. 

“You don’t know how to what, Connor?” Felix asks, voice soft and gentle.

“I don’t… I don’t know how to be my full self. Not around anyone. It’s not just you, Felix. You’re not doing anything to make me uncomfortable,” Connor states firmly, eyeing Felix, feeling it extremely imperative for Felix to understand this part. “I —” Again, he finds himself sighing. “I — Oh shit, I need to sneehhhh heh-HEH’tcHOO!” Connor sneezes straight onto the steering wheel, frowning “Uh, sorry,” he says, sheepishly, accepting the tissue Felix holds out for him.

Felix just lets out a laugh. “Please don’t apologize for sneezing. I mean, yeah, you could have covered, I guess,” he says, but it’s obvious he’s teasing. “But I guess that’s kind of hard to do when you’re trying to drive, so you’re excused, I suppose,” Felix jokes. “But, anyway, before we were rudely interrupted by your cold — what was it you were trying to say?”

Connor uses one hand to lightly blow his nose. “Um, right. I was saying I don’t know how to be my full self around anyone. I never really have. I mean, I’m not sure that version of myself is exactly… likable. You tell me all the time how perfect I am and how I’m always the most put together person in the room, so I’ve always figured that’s why you like me. I mean, who am I if I’m not that? If I’m feeling sick, or tired, or in a bad mood…. Then, what do I even have to offer?” Connor asks, his voice trembling. He sniffles, but he doesn’t think it has anything to do with his illness this time. 

“Babe,” Felix says, sounding somehow both incredulous and comforting. “Oh my god. How did I not realize you were so… so… stupid? Like, I’ve always said you’re the smartest person I know, but damn…. People really do contain multitudes, huh? Who knew?” 

At this, Connor feels his face contort in confusion. “What the fuck, Felix?” he asks, feeling justified in his response. 

Felix just laughs. “Connor, let me ask you a question. Whenever I’m tired, or sick, or in a bad mood, do you wish I’d just go off somewhere and deal with it on my own? Answer honestly.”

Connor thinks about the question, feeling his brows furrow. “Obviously not, Felix, but it’s not the same thing.”

“Uh-huh,” Felix says in a disbelieving tone. “And exactly how is it not the same thing?”

“Because… Because you’re you. Even when you’re less-than-perfect, you’re still you. You’re still adorable and silly and wonderful no matter what kind of a mood you’re in. Even when you were sick with a 104 degree fever, you still managed to make me laugh. Even when you’re in a bad mood, your little nose scrunches up and your cute brown eyes get all squinty, and I just want to kiss you. I mean I never do because I’d never want to be dismissive of your very valid feelings, but… just so you know, the thought crosses my mind,” he says looking pointedly over to Felix, but then his frown returns, knowing he has to finish what he’s saying. “My point is, Felix, you still have plenty to offer. But, me? I mean, who the hell am I if I’m not always composed, if I don’t always know the right thing to say? If all I feel like doing at the moment is just lying down and complaining?” Connor’s throat feels tight as he says the words.

“Baby, you really don’t know?” Felix asks, sounding genuinely astonished. “It makes you human, Connor. And that’s who I fell in love with. I thought so, anyway. I mean, I have heard about AI making some serious advancements recently. But, to my knowledge, I’m not dating a robot. Right?” Felix asks.

Connor can’t help but laugh, which turns into a small cough. “See, this is what I mean, Felix. You can make me laugh no matter how upset or concerned you are. But, no, I’m not a robot. And I obviously understand that humans are flawed. But, a flawed Felix is very different from a flawed Connor, is what I’m trying to say.”

There’s a long moment filled with silence where Connor’s heart stops at the realization that Felix might agree — that he might be understanding Connor’s point. What will Connor do, then?

“Connor, for the record, I still think you’re being immensely stupid. I need to hear you explicitly state that so there’s no confusion. So, please show me you understand,” Felix says, pausing expectantly. 

“Let you know I understand what? That I’m aware that you think I’m stupid?” Connor asks with a shake of his head.

“Yes, please say it clearly and concisely for the record,” Felix says, sounding very serious.

Connor glances over at him as he knits his brows, then turns his gaze back to the road. “Um, okay…. You think I’m being ‘immensely stupid.’ Is that what you wanted me to say?”

“Yes!” Felix says, sounding pleased. “Okay, now that we are on the same page in understanding that I think you’re stupid, I have another question to pose.” He pauses a moment before continuing. “How am I supposed to know if I love a flawed Connor if you never show him to me?” he asks, voice much softer.

Connor fixes his gaze on the road, feeling his eyes begin to sting. He puts on his turn signal to indicate he’s pulling off onto the next exit — even though it’s not the exit for his actual destination. Connor appreciates Felix sitting silently as Connor pulls off onto the exit and just drives. He drives for several minutes as he tries to hold back his tears. He wonders when was the last time he cried. He eventually sees a McDonald’s and pulls into the parking lot. He puts the car in park, and finally meets Felix’s gaze. 

“Felix, do you remember when your mom made that giant pot of soup for you when you were sick? And then she did the same thing for Ben when he got pneumonia?” Felix looks confused, but nods anyway. “I never had that. Never. When I was sick, growing up, my mom — well, she would barely even address the fact I was sick. She let me stay home from school, but in hindsight, I’m sure that was to protect her own self, and nothing to do with my actual well-being.” He pauses, sighing as the memories flood back. “I was still expected to go on as usual, for the most part. Do my homework. Do my chores. I mean, the one and only time I was allowed to just lie down and be sick was when I had an appendectomy. And, oh my god, trying to convince my mom to even take me to the hospital in the first place…” Connor trails off, shaking his head. Then he feels a tickle building and he presses tissues fully around his nose in preparation for the sneeze.

“Haaah-ap’tchoo! Huh-ah-ap’tchoo!” Connor blows his nose, then goes then lowers his tissue, but suddenly has to dive back into the tissue as the tickle returns. “HAH-APTCHUH! AP-T’CHUUUH!” He blows his nose again, then starts coughing, and finally he finishes, rolling his eyes in frustration at the interruptions. “Excuse me,” he says looking sheepishly at Felix, who is frowning.

“Your sneezes are starting to sound bad, again,” Felix says, sounding so genuinely concerned that Connor doesn’t have it in him to be annoyed, and also Connor is starting to feel really tired. His eyelids are protesting against his determination to keep them open. He’d already been feeling quite physically exhausted, but all the emotional turmoil he’s been putting himself through in the past twenty minutes has definitely made matters worse. So, he just stares at Felix as he sniffles, uncertain of what to say.

“You were talking about your neglectful mother,” Felix says, urging Connor to continue.

Connor looks down. “I wouldn’t say neglectful. I mean, it could have been a lot worse.”

Felix sighs. “We’ve been down this road before. It’s fine — we don’t have to go back down it again. Right now, anyway. Just — what were you saying?”

Connor takes a deep breath, then coughs. He clears his throat. “I guess I’m just trying to explain why it feels so deeply and intrinsically wrong for me to be weak or vulnerable. I’m just so profoundly not used to it, Felix. I mean, even looking past all the stuff with my family…. If I ever told one of my ex-boyfriends that I wasn’t feeling up to going out for whatever reason, it was never really met with a great reception, you know? Especially with Eric.”

“Ahh…” Felix starts. “Eric. The ex who clearly had an unchecked alcohol problem. I remember him, yes. You told me about how when you said no to going out for drinks once, he called you a ‘stuck-up, pretentious prick who thought he was better than everyone else.’”

Connor leans his head back against the headrest and closes his eyes at the memories of Eric. “Yeah,” he says, sighing. “That’s the one.” He realizes that resting his eyes actually feels pretty good — great, actually. 

“Baby, I don’t think you’re feeling very good,” Felix says, his voice soft and soothing, like a lullaby. Connor considers turning up the heat but that would require opening his eyes and moving. He imagines how nice a thick blanket would feel right now. God, could anything be better than a thick blanket? he wonders to himself.

Fuck, you have a fever.

The thought is like ice water being poured over him and he opens his eyes and shakes his head, pushing away the grogginess. 

He coughs a few times before turning to Felix. “I’m… not at one hundred percent,” he offers, hoping that’ll be enough for Felix, for now. 

Felix looks at him, his big brown eyes full of sympathy and concern. “I can tell. And I guess that’ll do for now,” he says, sighing. “At least you aren’t pretending to be ‘fine’ anymore. I guess I can’t expect you to tear down all your walls after one conversation.”

Connor stares at Felix —  his hair a mess, waves going in a thousand directions. His eyes, though full of concern, are also full of warmth… and love. Connor keeps staring at Felix as he thinks about everything he’s given him. Could Connor even grasp the concept of love if he didn’t have Felix? He remembers once thinking the notion of love was entirely overrated, but… that was before Felix. He knows, now, what it feels like to lose that love, and Connor’s confident he could not withstand that facing that loss ever again.

“I’d do it for you,” Connor says simply. “I’d tear down every single one of them for you. Just, give me a little time, okay?” 

“Of course,” Felix says with a soft smile. “As long as you promise not to shut me out, anymore, okay? I want to get to know all of you, Connor.”

Connor just nods feeling his eyes sting, once again. He straightens up in the driver’s seat and clears his throat. “Okay. Since we’ve somehow found ourselves at a McDonald’s, do you think you could go in and grab me a coffee before we finally head off to the… uh, your surprise,” he finishes, glad he caught himself.

Felix raises his eyebrows. “Of course I’ll get you a coffee, babe, but I think the only place we should be heading after this is home. You’re sick.”

Connor uses every bit of effort that exists inside of him to bite back the words on his tongue and finally allows himself to nod. “I am. I’m sick. And… I think maybe it’s not just a cold,” he allows himself to finally admit. Though the statement should be innocuous — Connor realizes this —  it still feels like the equivalent of saying “I’m useless and worthless now and have nothing to offer you, so you may as well dump me.” 

You have GOT to find yourself a therapist, the rational part of his mind interjects. 

Felix smiles and takes Connor’s hand in his. “Thank you for telling me that. Can I ask you another question?”

Connor drops Felix’s hand to jerk to the side, sneezing into his elbow. “HET-CHUUUUHHH!”

After sniffling, and wiping his watery eyes, he fixes his gaze back on Felix. “Uh, sure, yeah, shoot.”

“Whenever I was sick with the flu, what did you think? I mean, were you repulsed by me?”

“God, Felix, you know I wasn’t. I was mostly just worried. You were really sick and all I wanted was for you to feel better — because I love you and I hate seeing you feel so bad,” Connor explains. 

Felix smiles, as though Connor just said something very important. “Exactly. And right now, all I want is for you to feel better. And I don’t think going, uh… wherever it is we’re going is going to be conducive to getting you to feel better.”

“Okay….” Connor begins, not sure how to finish his thought. “But, we are only thirty minutes away now, and we really might as well go. We don’t have to stay long. And I think seeing you happy will make me feel better, in a way.”

Felix stares at him for a while. “Connor…” he begins, wearing that same sad expression from before that Connor is really starting to despise. 

This time, Connor takes Felix’s hands. “I promise,” Connor says, surprising himself at how much he means what he’s getting ready to say. “I promise if I start feeling really bad, I’ll let you know, okay? Right now, I mostly just feel really tired, and a little bit chilled. But I think there’s ibuprofen somewhere in this car. That should help me make it through the next little bit. Then, well, then we can go home. And I’ll get snuggled up all nicely into bed and stay there until I’m better. Okay?” Connor asks, gently squeezing Felix’s hands.

Felix bites his lips, his brows still knitted. Finally he lets go of Connor’s hands and lets out a long breath, dropping his shoulders. “Okay,” he says, somewhat begrudgingly. “I mean, I know this is important to you. So, okay. But you have to tell me if it becomes too much. Seriously, Connor. If we get there and you pass out, or whatever, I’m going to be pissed.”

Connor laughs. “'Don’t let myself pass out’ — okay, noted.”

Felix glares at him. “I mean it, Connor! If you lie to me and still try to put up any kind of bullshit facade, there will be no words you can say that will make it better. I’m trusting you here, Connor. Do you understand?” Felix asks, eyes much more serious than Connor is used to seeing.

Connor pauses for a moment to show Felix he is really considering the words. “I promise. If I start to feel really bad, I’ll let you know, and head straight to the car.”

Felix sighs, throwing his head dramatically back against the headrest. “Okay, fine. But remember — I  will be so fucking pissed if you let your stupid, stoic self pass out. I already had to deal with that with Ben. I refuse to keep two, stubborn idiots in my life.”

Connor nods again, unable to stop the corners of his lips from twitching. “Absolutely understood. No passing out.”

“Fine,” Felix says again, obviously trying to convince himself he’s making the right decision. “I’ll go get that coffee then,” he says as he begins to open the passenger side door.

“Thank you, sweetie,” he says as Felix leaves the car.

He removes his glasses and pulls several tissues from the tissue box and lets himself just blow and blow his nose. It’s started to really fill up in the past ten minutes. His aches are also back, and worse than ever. He’s sure there must be one part of his body that isn’t aching, but he’s helpless to identify it. He’ll be fine, though, after this damn expo is through. This is the one thing Connor has planned for them since getting back together — aside from the casual dinner they had the other night. He has to see this through. Felix has always talked about wanting to go to a reptile expo, but there’s never been one that checked off all the boxes on Felix’s ethical checklist. Connor hates reptiles, vehemently, but he knows this will be his way of showing how much he cares for Felix. He spent hours researching the organization before he felt assured that Felix would approve of it. Felix would have to appreciate that, right? 

Then, after the expo —  which Connor is sure to be awful and terrifying and inevitably lead to him being confused about how could love such a weirdo like Felix —  he really will let himself rest. He doesn’t think he has a choice in the matter, regardless. All he has to do is just walk and stand a little. And, not pass out, of course.

Surely that won’t be that hard of a feat to manage.

Part 7

[vaguely-humanoid-form]

alrighty lads I am currently sick with like. a stomach flu (which I haven't had since I was like 5 so it's been a minute) and I'm gonna give YOU some good old uh

sick self care tips mostly specific to a stomach flu or something of that sort

or something.

big water bottle. big big water bottle. like stuff you bring to school or the gym or whatever. fill that bitch up with cold water (or other temperatures if that's what you so enjoy) maybe even add some ice. sip on this all day. SIP. don't chug. trust me on this one

if you can/want to, you can also have some ginger ale throughout the day if you're nauseous! I tend to already drink a lot of ginger ale and I have those like tiny cans of it and it's awesome

if you can, brush your got damn teeth!!! if anything it'll help you feel a little bit less gross especially if you've been throwing up lol

change into clean clothes. like genuinely I just did this and I feel so much better. I feel more like a person than a sickly tamagotchi or something now. and wear comfy stuff bc you're probably not gonna want to leave bed and it's better to hang out in bed while comfortable yk

turn your lights off or just have em low. it'll probably help with headaches and also it just feels nice in general

if you have longer hair, tie it back, loosely!! just grab a scrunchie or whatever and get it out of your face

find the stuff you can control and by god control it. when your entire body decides to turn on you tell it to fuck off and do what you can to feel like yourself.

being sick sucks ass but it'll get better I pinkie promise.

there are probably a jillion other posts like this out there but idk just wanted to give my 2 cents on this. some of this is probably inspired by a Tumblr screenshot I saw on Pinterest at some point in my life that I can't find but oh well

I can't think of anything else to say. take care of yourselves and don't let the horrors win. they may be assholes but you can find the strength to be an even bigger asshole

[hangonimevolving]

Spring 2024: It was a time of activity, it was a time of illness… but ultimately, a time of achievements.

So now, we find ourselves in early 2024. Vev’s 11th bday was more or less a non-event (at his own request) — except for us getting goofy and decorating our house with some salvaged decorations that he shamelessly stole after a work event. They were too perfect for Vev—- Pan Am theme!

(It occurs to me that I didn’t post anything about Dey’s 9th birthday, which was in December 2023. Oops, sorry Dey. Here, let me find a picture. We did celebrate it…somehow 😂)

Ok look - we DID do something. The reason I don’t remember is bc he pretty much tore into those Lego sets and was engrossed in building the entire day. Anyway.

Back to Feb 2024 and onward. The kids had a random half-day of school, and so happened that Dr. Spouse was asked by a local news affiliate to film a news segment on brain health - so I decided to take the kids down to the hospital and get a hands-on lesson on both healthcare and journalism. It was a fun and exciting little field trip!

Somewhere around this time, the kids had their respective Field Days at school. I was room parent for Vev’s room last year along with another friend, so I was heavily involved in organizing his class’ Field Day stuff - but I was on site and cheering for both kids, as was daddice for as much as he could manage.

March rolled in, and alas - minor disaster struck. Vev came down with what we thought was a cold… then he got a fever…and then, he was just very, very sick with flu-like symptoms including HIGH 104+ fevers, severe coughing and respiratory congestion, loss of appetite, and overall misery… for TWO WEEKS STRAIGHT. He missed 10 consecutive days of school and was just miserable for weeks - and we were too. Poor kiddo. I was juggling taking care of Dey, keeping him healthy and getting him off to/from school, along with nursing Vev, escorting him to (nightmarish and fury-inducing) pediatrician appointments (long story), sleeping in his room at night to help him get comfortable, overseeing round the clock meds and nebulizer treatments, and being a go-between for him, his teacher, and the school principal to keep him up to date on work. It was a LOT.

Thankfully, spring break immediately followed his two-week confinement, which gave him more time to recuperate - and even gave us a short getaway to Clearwater Beach for a few days once he was really feeling better.

Soon, it was April, then May. We were busy with lots of activities, including numerous Speech and Debate tournaments, and some medals won! I enjoyed volunteering as a judge for these tournaments. We also took a drive down to Ft. Lauderdale to see one of Vev’s drawings from Art class at school that was featured in a local art show for public school kids.

We had some other ups and downs in this time. Both cars were due for vet checkups….. always a time of hijinks and nerves (more for me than the cats). Pixel in particular had some adventures this year - due to her outstanding behavior 🤪 the vet prescribed her some gabapentin to “help her relax” during her physical exam. She was high as a kite.

An era came to an end. On May 5th, Dr. Spouse’s trusty 2014 Tesla Model S died a sudden and very peaceful (almost suspiciously peaceful) death, parked at the front of the kids’ Kumon center. Though the reality was hard to accept, we soon came to terms that we’d have to trade it in and lease a new car. So we all went to bid a final adieu to Red Flyer, aka “Lightning McQueen,” and welcome home Red Flyer 2.

Then, it was JUNE! And the end of the school year.was upon us. We were VERY proud of Dey for an awesome year at school, and of Vev for completing 5th grade, which in our community is a mini-graduation, as the kids head off to a whole new middle school in the fall!

So! This takes us to June 2024, and the end of the school year. Up next will be a synopsis of Summer 2024, which entailed some exciting travel, a bevy of summer camp adventures, and more. One final thought here - maybe it’s my paranoid mom brain, but I feel like this was a Vev-focused post, and I am concerned it looks like I don’t pay as much attention to Dey. But that couldn’t be further from the truth! Dey is everything, everywhere, all over at once - and even if one wanted to ignore him (which I don’t!) it would be impossible, bc he is a total cartoon, and keeps us laughing nonstop 😜 So I’ll make sure to bump up the Dey content in the next post!

[wendytestabrat]

opening up abt the past 2 weeks

so basically the reason why i hadn’t been active lately on here is bc i was like SUPER busy with a full time job but i just went through something really awful it’s like the universe decided to dump a giant nuclear bomb on me but when things like this happen i always try to tell myself that it’s all for a reason, bc god likes to redirect you. so like i got EXTREMELY sick with the flu for days, and i’m still even having some lingering symptoms now but i do feel way better, it was so bad that i was crippled and could barely get out of bed bc i had like 0 energy, so then I couldn’t go to work. i’ve been concerned abt my immune system lately bc i’ve gotten sick like 57382929 times this year, i’ve been constantly sick on and off but i still pushed through it so i could go to work and bc i needed $$$ and bc that’s what professionalism is all abt you work till you’re on your death bed PERIOD. i’m strongly against the lazy entitlement culture that libtards have created today where no one wants to work anymore but that’s a whole rant for another time lol i think i talked abt it in my rant on “Dikinbaus Hot Dogs” which made fun of this shit. but yeah i’ve had BOTH the flu and covid this year and btw i can confirm the flu is way worse, when i had covid i felt fine it was basically just a tiny cold lol (but the effects of covid are different for everyone) when i had the flu like MY GOD i had never been that sick before in my life i couldn’t MOVE. anyways i just had to go on a tangent abt that to further prove my point abt the dumbass media scare abt covid DHJSJS, but that’s not why i’m talking abt this. so yeah basically i feel like i was just forced to quit my job which i’m still feeling really sad and depressed about but I feel relieved at the same time because this was kind of inevitable and had to happen eventually. i think tho my body was just rlly tired and burnt out from constantly working non-stop bc i was working 40 hours a week with little rest and they wouldn’t let me take any time off, look i liked the job but the work life balance was NOT good lol. so i think i had just reached the final stage of burnout and my body totally collapsed on me, bc not getting adequate sleep and rest is not good for your immune system and can make you 100x more sick which is what happened to me.

at first i just missed like 3 days and i thought i would be good to go back to work but then more days were passing by and i was still feeling like shit and that’s when i realized i just had to quit. and then i was rlly beating myself up bc i knew i was gonna quit the job eventually but i wasn’t planning on just quitting the job cold turkey like this bc that never looks good to a company. i thought i would at least find a new job first and give them a 2 weeks notice bc i had made the mistake in the past of just quitting jobs immaturely before when i was younger so i rlly wanted to be an adult abt this this time, but it unfortunately worked out like this. but i feel like it all worked out for the best, because now i’m feeling good again especially that i have time to write again which i miss doing and now i can find a job more fulfilling. it was rlly hard but i had to keep myself calm through this whole storm to see the silver lining. just the other day when i took myself to the park to meditate and let off some steam bc i was so upset right when i finished i saw a rainbow in the sky after it was a dark and gloomy day, I really don’t think that was a coincidence. this was like the calm after the storm or the light at the end of the tunnel or whatever you want to call it.

[orionangeline]

I wish Yamato were here he'd bring me porridge with a Lil leaf in it and some water and tuck me in with a cold compress and

[mysteriousooze]

Any Valerie Gray headcanons?

Ohohoho now where did I put that soapbox...

Valerie eventually has to come to terms with her own ghostly nature. She has been imbued and empowered by nanobots and ectoplasm, and even when she isn't using any of it, she is different now

Technus is capable of mind controlling Valerie. Fortunately, he is stupid. He doesn't think to do so for a very long time, and it's obvious the moment he does

They never actually figure out how to prevent technus from controlling her. But thankfully he never gets good at it. Instead, he learns to fear being beaten like a pinata by teenagers

Eventually, the GIW is able to pick Valerie up on their sensors due to her super suit living under her skin

Valerie is not a halfa. She doesn't have ghost powers. To any ecologists, she seems highly contaminated and likely overshadowed.

Any attempt or even success in removing the ectoplasm and nanobots from her system will kill her.

Valerie was that kid who never missed a day of school even if she had the flu and everyone would have been safer if she had stayed home. Being sick just makes her stubbornly determined to persevere.

(Valerie stays home from school the day she realizes the anti-ecto acts apply to herself)

If Valerie were to ever come into contact with blood blossoms, she would feel pain within her entire body, followed by muscle spasms as if being jolted with electricity, and—with prolonged exposure—sores would open on her skin and start leaking ectoplasm.

Blood blossoms alone wouldn't kill her, unlike Danny. But they would weaken her immune system enough that something else likely would.

Valerie eventually develops a sort of sixth sense for electromagnetic fields

If Danny transforms into a human and keeps a lid on his powers, he can hide from the GIWs sensors. Valerie can never hide.

Valerie's eyes are opened to her own behavior toward ghosts after the GIW treat her as subhuman.

It's not Danny who saves her. It's Sam Manson.

Valerie's dad and Sam's parents work with the teen girls as they spearhead the ecto rights movement. Valerie becomes a figurehead. She hates it, but she hates the GIW more

Eventually when Valerie joins team Phantom, she learns that Tucker has been able to track her location using her nanobots this whole time

The more she learns about Danny's weird friends, the more she comes to respect them

Hey friendship with Sam is frightening to behold. The bond over the destruction of their enemies

She doesn't touch romance with a ten-foot pole, and is thankful nobody brings up feelings. Team Phantom have flashes of rage or betrayal or yearning, usually followed by an awkward silence. But mostly it's because they're low-key being hunted by the government

(Publicly, the government isn't hunting them at all. They strike indirectly, or when ghosts can take the blame. They place substitute teachers in Casper High, which is always badly understaffed. It's a strange cold war.)

Valerie never has the problems with controlling her nanobots that Danny did his powers, but sometimes her reflexes get the better of her.

Valerie would rather get angry than cry

She almost shot her dad once when he tried to wake her up from a nightmare. She bawled for two hours while he held her

Valerie sees herself as an adult after becoming a ghost hunter. She occasionally doesn't see Youngblood bc of this

She's honestly such a daddy's girl tho it's kind of embarrassing. If Young blood tried to sneak up on her while she was with him, he would immediately be spotted

Valerie never becomes one of the popular kids again, but rises above it all. She's the kind of powerhouse of a girl that kids part like the red sea to get out of her way

She doesn't become a leader so much as a linchpin of teenage civil disobedience

She knows everyone in Casper High. She has their phone numbers. She has their secrets. And she knows most have been trained with Fenton Blasters and are willing to use them

With a single mass text that the GIW is cornering Phantom, a flood of teenagers takes to the streets for their hero

Valerie isn't the leader of a teenage militia. But isn't not NOT a leader iykyk

Valerie eventually develops an affinity for controlling technology

Technus decides that she is his daughter

It's like a much less dangerous version of the relationship between Danny and Vlad

He still wants to take over the world but also considers himself to be a good father who does not fight his daughter

Team Phantom can recruit him as an ally

As an unrepentant daddy's girl, Valerie is filled with unquenchable rage at the presumption of this undead weirdo

Technus might have tried challenging Valerie's dad if team Phantom didn't keep gaslighting him that he couldn't tell humans apart "omg Technus that's not even her dad. He has a completely different eye color"

Valerie accidentally activates the nanobots inside of Jazz. They can't do all of the things that Valerie's does, but between the two of them, they figure out how to strengthen her, as well as make her immune to overshadowing

Nanobot buddies:)

Tucker is a mite envious

Dani is the little sister Valerie always yearned for; she feels like a partner in crime and like her baby girl all at once.

Jazz is the big sister she never wanted

Danny will never feel like a brother tho lol

Valerie and Danny have solidarity in helping each other avoid therapy with Jazz

All of their parents (except her own dad) trust Valerie implicitly for some reason. "Well if Valerie's there then whatever you're doing is okay" kind of deal

It baffles, outrages, and amuses the trio, bc Valerie is just as bad if not worse

Valerie is a force of nature

Valerie will continue to hone her ghost hunting abilities. Not bc she hates ghosts; to protect the ghosts closest to her heart

Bc Vlad Masters is the real monster, and he is escalating. Someday, someone will have to put him down. And he's already in her sights.