#this year is a lot of firsts. like first con first monster first everything

[eudico-my-beloved]

GUESS WHO WENT TO THE WILL WOOD CONCERT TODAY (yesterday. it is currently 6.11 am) :D

[tinfoil-jones]

Tate Pines AU 

(aka Tater McGucket is an oops baby Fiddlestan kid)

Note: LONG POST. This is me hyper fixating on a brain worm because the Gravity Falls Fandom roared back to life. This is probably misspelled in a lot of areas, and not the clearest or most concise post because this is me rambling at 2 in the morning. Also the characters are maybe OOC. Also, this is written without accents because I'm not from the Midwest or southern United States.

In this AU/Scenario, Stan is a transgender man, and 'encountered' Fiddleford during his vagabond years. It was a heavily drunk/high one-night-stand, so they never properly met or even knew each others names. This happens after Ford graduating Backupsmore University, and for this scenario to work let’s say that Fiddleford went to BMU for his undergraduate program, but then went to the local university in Palo Alto for his graduate studies.

Years later, just like in the OG show Fiddleford is Stanford's research partner in Gravity Falls, and married to Emma-May Dixon; but they don't have any children together at this time, and they got together *after* his encounter with Stan. So this isn't an affair baby scenario.

Tatum "Tate" Pines is 5 years old, living on the road with his dad, currently staying in a motel but they're about to move into a real apartment for the first time ever because Tate needs to start school soon. Stan is still a drifter and a con man, but he recently came upon a large sum of money because Tate accurately guessed the lottery number for the state they were currently in.

Stan still receives a postcard from Gravity Falls that says "Please Come", and is allegedly sent from his estranged Twin who he hasn't seen in almost 12 years. But this is roughly a few months before it would have happened in-canon.

Given Stan's disownment, no one knows that he even has a son, not even Ma Pines. Not like he'd want them to know. Having his own son and loving him unconditionally made him realize that his own dad Filbrick was a monster, who he didn't need to prove himself to. But he still wants to reconcile with Ford, so he decides to go just like in canon.

This post card, however, wasn't sent by Ford. It was sent by Fiddleford, who was watching Ford spiral in real time and hoped that if anyone could convince Ford that he was acting crazy and unstable, it was his twin brother.

While Stanford doesn't greet Stanley with a crossbow like in the original because this is before the portal test with Fiddleford, he's definitely shocked to not just see Stanley there, but Stanley with a tiny gap-toothed child in tow.

Stan doesn't know that Ford wasn't expecting them, and excitedly introduces Ford to his nephew.

Ford: Stanley, are you sure this child is yours? Stan: ...Ford, did you forget we're not identical twins?  Ford: ...Oh! Oh my, Stanley... Stan: *thinking* 'I don't know if I'm touched that you don't see me as anything other than a man... or insulted that you forgot something so fundamental about me'

Flabbergasted, Ford lets them both in; Fiddleford is welding something downstairs so he doesn't see or hear any of this. Ford plants Tate on the couch in front of the TV and practically drags Stan to the kitchen to talk to him privately; he's too surprised by Stan having a child to question why they were there in the first place.

Ford: Is there a... another parent..? Stan: ...It's just me and Tate. Always has been. Ford: How did...? Stan: I didn't plan a pregnancy... but I had no money for T-shots for months on end, and without the T, everything down stairs went to factory default.  Ford: Do you know who it is? The father- I mean, the other father? Stan: Not exactly, some southern guy, don't think I ever got his name. Ford: What happened? Stan: Funny you should ask. (FLASHBACK) Fiddleford, high out of his mind: -and that's how I won a golden fiddle. Stan, drunk out of his mind: That's crazy, dude. *grabs him aggressively by the shirt collar to pull him close* Now shut up and fuck me until I can't walk. Fiddleford, horny out of his mind: Hoo-whee, well don't you diddly-darn mind if'n I do. (END) Ford: Stanley? Stan: Hmm? Ford: Are you okay? You just said 'its funny that you ask', and then stared off into space for 10 seconds. Stan: Let's just say I never touched tequila ever again.

Eventually, Fiddleford does come upstairs when he notices Ford didn't come back downstairs, and see's the brothers in the kitchen just as Ford asks Stan why he even came here.

Fiddleford admits it was him who sent the postcard, that someone needed to 'talk some sense' into Ford, and then introduces himself to Stan.

While Stan isn't perplexed by Fiddleford because he was too drunk to remember a face- Fiddleford, who has very good memory, immediately knows he met Stan somewhere, he just can't quite place where, when, or why.

Ford does show Stan the portal, saying it's his life's work and he'll need to test it soon, and casually asks Stan if he wants to stay and help. Before Fiddleford can protest that's a bad idea and Ford should just stop, Stan agrees because he wants to reconnect (and also keep a roof over Tate's head, what were the chances they'd win another lottery?), it did hurt his feelings that Stanford hadn't reached out out to him after all, but maybe they could work on that.

While Ford hasn't exactly forgiven Stanley for the science fair incident, he can't just let his brother, a single father be homeless with a five-year-old (Stan had to drop the lease with their intended apartment to come to Gravity Falls). And... well, Ford gets attached to Tate quite early:

Tate: ... *staring at him* Ford: Can I help you with something, Tatum? Tate: Uncle, is your name "Stanford"?  Ford: Yes, but if you prefer you can call me Uncle Ford. Tate: Oh. Okay. It's funny, Stanford is my middle name. *later* Stan: Kiddo, why has your uncle been sobbing in his room for the past thirty minutes? Tate: *shrugs*

Not realizing the gravity (hehe) of the situation, Stan gets settled in the house and helps Ford and Fiddleford where he can (usually just moving heavy objects or punching paranormal creatures, or forcing Ford to shower). He does notice that Ford seems a bit... unhinged, and weirdly obsessed with some new geometry based religion, but people change after college right?

He does get unnerved by Fords weird episodes where his personality seems to shift and he goes into town to act like an absolute menace. Stan can't help but think that isn't Ford; its been years since he saw him but damnit he knew his brother and whatever entity possessed him just to slap a cops belly, *that* was not Ford. But Ford always brushed him off when he tried to bring it up, and one time 'Ford' even coldly reminded Stan that he could remove Stanley and his son from the home at any time if he wasn't going to be useful.

During this time, Stan and Fiddleford get to know each other, they get along quite well actually; Fiddleford is fond of little Tatum, who along with Stan enjoys listening to him play the banjo. One could say, given Fords obsession with his current passion project and prioritizing work over his relationships, that Stan and Fiddleford become close. 

Fiddleford picks up, however... that little Tate is a genius. Although he's a quiet kid, he has an advanced vocabulary for his age. He's able to read and write at what must be a 2nd or 3rd grade level despite not even starting kindergarten yet, and... one time Fiddleford left an 8x8 cubiks cube unattended, and came back no more than five minutes later to see that Tate had already solved it. And Stan had told him that Tate has actively predicted lottery numbers before.

He brings it up with Stan, who admits that he already knows Tate is a genius, but he also knows what academic pressure and high expectations can do to someone (referring to Ford), and he just wants Tate to live life by his own terms, not let other people dictate that for him based on his IQ.

Fiddleford... also see's resemblances between himself and Tate. Sure, Tate has browner hair like Stan, but the wavier texture is just like his own. And while Stanley does have a prominent nose, it's not as prominent as Tates, which is much more similar to Fiddlefords. 

Fiddleford begins to ask Stan about his past, specifically bringing up that he believes they may have met before.

Fiddleford: Say, Stan, did we meet before you moved here? You're so familiar to me. Stan: I wonder where you could have possibly seen my face before? *glances at the lab* Fiddleford: No. I feel like we've met before - you ever been to Palo Alto? Stan: That city in Cali? Yeah. I'd say about six years ago. I was just passing by, resupplying, and selling weed to college students. Fiddleford: You were a weed dealer? Stan: Among other things, yeah. California's *the* place to go to for weed. I don't do it anymore. Fiddleford: Did you... ever visit the university there? Stan: A couple times. Hated going there because it reminded me of... well, I think you know. Why? Fiddleford: I did my graduate studies there, maybe I met you there? Stan: You think so? I only saw buyers, did you buy weed from me? Fiddleford: No... I had a dealer, but it wasn't you. Stan: Other than that, I did get invited to a frat party once. Think they were called "SigEp" or something. Fiddleford: That's 'Sigma Phi Epsilon'. That was the fraternity I belonged to. Did I see you at that party? Stan: Probably - oh man that party was crazy. I made so many bad decisions that night. Fiddleford: Stanley... how old did you say your son was? Stan: Five, why? Fiddleford: ... Fiddleford: Stanley... *reaches out* Stan: *jerks back, before pointing away* Hey look over there, a distraction! Fiddleford: What- *looks away* Stan: *jumps out the window and makes a run for it*

Stan does not entertain any further discussions with Fiddleford about his past, and goes out of his way to keep Tate with him and away from Fiddleford. Given his criminal past, he's afraid that if Fiddleford is correct, he could make legal actions to take Tate away from him.

Fiddleford eventually goes to Ford about his suspicions.

Fiddleford: Stanford I'm going to tell you something, and I need you to promise you'll stay calm. Stanford: *doesn't look up from microscope* Are you going to tell me you suspect you're Tatum's father because you slept with my brother around the time he would have been concieved? Fiddleford: ... Stanford: Because you are. Fiddleford: What in tar- Stanford: *tosses a file folder towards Fiddleford* I have all of our DNA on file - Fiddleford: You do???? Stanford: Of course I do! I store the DNA profile of everyone who's entered my residence, just in case there's a shifter afoot. Comparing yours and Stanley's DNA to Tatum's, there is only a 0.001% chance that he isn't your biological child. Fiddleford: ... *speechless* Stanford: Congratulations, according to science you're a father.

Fiddleford does eventually manage to talk to Stan about it, and clear the air between them. Stan is apprehensive because Fiddleford is married, but he's at least relieved that Tate happened before Fiddleford was in a relationship with Emma-May. Stan allows Fiddleford to spend more time with Tate (supervised), but they agree Tate doesn't need to know just yet what Fiddleford is to him.

Fiddleford also holds back on telling his wife about Tate, he'd prefer to tell her face-to-face.

But then the portal test happens and Fiddleford gets a glimpse of the horrors beyond the portal, which traumatizes him just like in the original. This doesn't convince him to leave, because Ford is becoming dangerous and Fiddleford is worried about what would happen if Stan and Tate were left alone with him. He invents the memory gun, but holds up on using it on himself.

The relationship Ford has with both Stan and Fiddleford  becomes more explosive. Stan and Fiddleford are both telling Ford that he's messing with forces beyond his control.

To get Fiddleford off of his back about the portals, Ford instead lashes out at him about something else.

Stanford: Fiddleford... you know you're my best friend right? Fiddleford: ...Of course. Stanford: Stanley and I don't have a good relationship... we haven't in a long time. *puts a hand on his shoulder* But don't you dare hurt my brother, or nephew. I don't care how strained things are between Stanley and myself, or how close you and I are... He's my brother, and I'll always protect him, even if it's from you. Fiddleford: Do you think I would try to steal Tatum, Stanford?! *Pushes him away* Also, if you're going to threaten me, you could at least not be such a hypocrite. Stanford: How dare- Fiddleford: You say you care about Stanley? That you'd protect him? He's been homeless for over a decade! You SAW him get kicked out of home when he was still a minor! He escaped three different prisons, had extremely shady black-market top-surgery, chewed his way out of the trunk of a car, and gave birth by himself in an alleyway! He had walking pneumonia for nearly a year straight and almost died from it because he had to choose between himself and Tate over who needed treatment more!  But you didn't know any of that, did you? Because you don't talk to him or try to reach out. You still avoid him. You still treat him like he's your enemy. You're still resentful about that damn science project.  You don't know him or what he went through. You didn't even want him here, I called him up here so maybe somebody could set you straight!  Working with this portal, messing with these forces beyond comprehension and control- the only threat to Stan and our son is you! Ford: Get the hell out of my lab- and stay the hell away from my twin.

But this 'Mystery Trio'-esque era of their lives has a Bad End:

After Ford gets sucked into the portal the same way as he did in the original, Stanley decides to take over his identity; Fiddleford helps him with everything up until Stan fakes his own death.

As Tate's biological (other) father, and Stan having recently altered Tate's birth certificate to add Fiddleford, the boy is given to Fiddleford right away following Stan's 'death' and not put into foster care or an orphanage. This window of time is also when Fiddleford establishes the Society of The Blind Eye, but he chooses a leader after he founds it rather than leading it himself.

When Stan makes it clear he's going to dedicate himself to fixing the portal and bringing Ford back, Fiddleford makes a drastic decision. 

Knowing what the portal obsession did to Stanford, Fiddleford doesn't want Tate to be around if- no, when, the same thing happens to Stan. 

He uses the memory gun on Stan to make him forget about their son entirely. He does the same thing to Tate to make him forget about Stanley, legally changes his name to Tater McGucket, and takes him back to California with him.

He makes this decision because in this scenario he never used the memory gun on himself, so the memory of what's on the other side of the portal still haunts him, making him more desperate and callous, especially with a child involved.

It breaks his heart that he did this, but he doesn't want Tate to be dragged into Pines drama. He takes the boy home and tells his wife that he was conceived before they were together (looking at Tate's age, he was born at least a year before they started dating), and uses the news clipping about Stan's death to explain how he got custody without any trouble, and Emma-May adopts Tate. Tates memory gaps are excused by his young age, and the trauma of losing a parent at such a young age, so Fiddleford and Emma-May decide not to tell him about Stanley.

Stan forgets about both Tate and Fiddleford, but he has this deep sense of loss and betrayal that he can't place. He figures over the years that maybe it's just some of his feelings about Ford having gone through the portal...

Decades later, and after a divorce, Fiddleford moves back to Gravity Falls, bringing Tate with him so Tate can start his Bait and Tackle Shop somewhere quiet. Fiddleford is there to check up on the Society of the Blind Eye, and also to check on Stanley because he feels guilty about what he did. Although he knows that this is Stanley pretending to be Stanford, he says nothing to anybody about it, it's the least he could do.

When Stan see's Fiddleford again - he doesn't know why, because he's 'never met the guy', but just looking at his face pisses him off. And every time Stan see's Fiddleford from then on, whether its across the street or at the shops or what have you, he is openly hostile towards him even if he can't adequately explain why he feels this way about Fiddleford. Also strangely attracted to him, particularly his banjo playing, but its overshadowed by his hostility.

Stan meets Tate shortly after the Tate and Backles Bait and Tackle shop is opened... and he doesn't know why, but this young man he's never met makes him feel sad. But also... Relieved? Elated? Proud?? He comes by often, sometimes not even buying (or stealing) anything, he just chats with Tate (and Backle to a lesser degree).

Tate himself feels strangely fond of this frequent flier customer. Like he's met a dear old friend. He is awfully confused why Stan will sometimes call him 'Tatum', seemingly without noticing, and why he never feels like correcting him. 

Fiddleford knows why, because he never erased his own memory, and he feels so guilty. But it's been 30 years, he can't say anything without ruining his relationship with Tate (which became strained after the divorce, which in this timeline happened maybe around Tate's late teen/early adult years). 

One way that this whole thing can be revealed is when Dipper and Mabel deal with The Blind Eye society, they find two memory tubes, one labelled "Tatum S. Pines" and another labeled "Stan Pines" take it with them because it has their last name, and Grunkle Stans name, on them.

They play the one labeled Stan Pines at first, and realize it's Tates early childhood memories of Stan.

When they play the one labeled "Tatum S. Pines" they see it's all of Grunkle Stans memories of Tate, leading up to his confrontation with Fiddleford.

(MEMORY) Stan, backing up: Wait, what is that thing? Fiddleford, what are you doing with that?! Fiddleford, pointing the memory gun at him: I'm sorry Stan, I truly am. But I can't let you drag our son into this... I do care for you, and I wish things could have been different. But you're just like him!  **BLAST** (END OF MEMORY)

This horrifies them, and they have a real moral conundrum of if they tell Stan and Tate, or if they keep it to themselves to keep the peace. 

They deserve to know... but it'd be so painful. And this would take place before "The Tale of Two Stans" so they don't even know what Fiddleford was talking about to justify stealing Tate, or who 'him' is.

Eventually, it's Wendy and Soos who confront McGucket and tell him that he better be honest with Stan and Tate, or they're going to do it for him. That he's a selfish coward who ripped someone's young child from their arms.

Or, an alternative scenario; Fiddleford never stored those memories in the first place, or at least didn't store them with the Society of the Blind Eye, and it's Ford who brings this all up to Stan. Ford was already through the portal when Fiddleford decided that parental abduction was totally okay if there was amnesia involved.

Ford: Are these Tatum's children? *motioning to Dipper and Mabel*. Stan: They're Shermie's grandkids, and - who? Ford: ...Tatum? Tatum Stanford Pines? Your son. Stan: ...I don't- I don't have a son. *tears gathers in the corner of his eyes, but he either doesn't notice, or chooses to not react* And if I did, I wouldn't give him your name as a middle. Ford: Yes you do, and yes you did. You introduced us right before the portal incident. I even DNA-sequenced him to confirm that his other father was Fiddleford. Stan: WHAT? And- who?? Ford: Here, look *pulls up his DNA files from ones of his secret safes in the lab and shows it to Stanley, which not only has the DNA results but also pictures of Stanley, Fiddleford, and Tate from the time* Honestly Stanley, how could you forget a child you car-.

Ford realizes something is wrong when it's clear that Stanley is distressed, but also confused, like having a son is legitimately a surprise to him. He's so shocked he has to lie down for a bit. His eyes keep leaking tears but he doesn't know why 'Fords cruel and oddly elaborate joke' is making him so upset, because 'clearly it's not true'.

When Ford hears Fiddleford lives in Gravity Falls, he seeks him out and demands answers.

At first, Fiddleford tries to play it off like maybe Ford was remembering things wrong - but with enough pressure, and a ray gun pointed at his chest, Fiddleford finally comes clean. About what he did. Why he did it.

Ford is still angry at Stan for getting him trapped in the Nightmare Realm Multiverse for 30 years; and then stealing his name, identity, and house, but that's still his twin brother. And what Fiddleford did was to him was horrendous, especially after Stanford had already warned him years ago to not to hurt Stan or Tate. This was a crime against the whole Pines family. 

So Ford beats him up. No, he doesn't kill or maim him, but he beats the living dog shit out of him until Fiddleford promises the glass tubes of Stan and Tate's memories in exchange for mercy.

Mabel, Dipper (and Soos/Wendy) are clearly confused (because they wouldn't have seen the memories in the "The Hall of the Forgotten"). Although, this whole revelation does bring Dipper closer to Stan, because Dipper had no idea he wasn't the only transgender person in the family.

Ford shows these memories to Stan first, who is going through all kinds of emotions especially after getting Ford back and their bitter reunion. This allows Ford and Stan to somewhat reconcile early; just like how Ford lost 30 years of his life to the portal, Stanley lost 30 years with his own son because of his conviction to fix it.

Ford also has to physically stop Stan from hunting down and murdering Fiddleford (who Stan only knew as McGucket up to this point) with his bare hands. Reminding him that it's more important that he reaches out to Tate.

But Stan is conflicted. He wants to be Tate's dad again but... Tate is in his mid-thirties, he doesn't need him like he did when he was 5. And Tate already has two loving parents, both of which don't have an extensive criminal record, and who provided him with a stable home, which Stan never did because they were homeless the whole time.

Does he really want to uproot Tate's life and/or peace of mind with a revelation this big?  

This goes all the way to Weirdmageddon, where everyone gathers in the Mystery Shack for security; faced with a possible end of the world, Stan takes Tate to the side, dragging Fiddleford with them, and tells him the truth. Fiddleford confirms it all, ashamed and apologetic. Finally, they give Tate his memory tube, which he watches.

For a moment Stan and Fiddleford have a moment of solidarity; Stan can see that Fiddleford really did want to spare Tate from whatever unknown-at-the-time fate had befallen Stanford because of the portal.

Fiddleford finally faces his past mistakes, and apologizes for what he did. That what he did was wrong, and he can never make it up to them, but if they survive this maybe he could try to make things right.

This is their last family moment between the three of them pre memory-wipe.

The mind wipe thing still happens. Gravity Falls is saved. Mabel and Dipper manage to jog Stan's memory but there's no way to make him remember Tate - the glass memory tubes have already been used, and Stan didn't keep any photos from his homeless era because he couldn't afford it most of the time, and when he could he always managed to get kicked out of whatever state they were in before the photos were done developing.

Once again, Ford comes in clutch. Throughout his last journal, just like how he made entries about Fiddleford, he also made entries about Stan and Tate, including detailed sketches. How Tate liked to get into high places, exasperating Stanley who was afraid of heights. How Stan would take him to the woods to follow the creeks because Tate was intrigued by waterways. How Tate said so few words but Stan always seemed to know exactly what he wanted or needed at any given time. How Tate only liked eating the green M&M's but Stan was fine with it because he got to eat the rest. 

Now while Stan's heartwarming memories of his son come back, so does his desire to break Fiddlefords neck. 

Fiddleford still buys the Northwest Mansion and converts it to "McGucket's Hootenanny Hut", but because the Pines families are the heroes of Gravity Falls, they (Ford) manage to convince the local government to put Fiddleford on house arrest for an indeterminate amount of time as punishment for 30-something years of parental abduction and alienation (also the whole starting a Cult thing). Fiddleford accepts this, and Tate still lives with him.

Post memory-wipe Stan still reconciles with both of them, and his relationship with Fiddleford is... weird, but not entirely bad. It's like they're dating, but with a lot of emotional distance. Like, Stan still tells Ford he wants to murder him... but also tells him to never, ever, check their texting history. 

Stan still goes to sail the world with Ford on the Stan O'War II. They do invite Tate, who declines because "He'd rather just live the simple life in Gravity Falls, and not get involved in whatever supernatural gobbledygook his dad and uncle are sure to get into".

And Stan is so proud of him... because just like he said thirty years, there's nothing he wanted more for Tate than to live his life by his own terms. He video chat's with him as often as he does with Dipper and Mabel. 

Tate ends up keeping McGucket as his last name, but he changes his first and middle back to what it was originally.

And that's the end of this tale, thanks for sticking with me. Here's a passage where Ford teases Stan while they're on their sea adventure;

Ford: It was so sweet of you to give your son my name. Stan: Poindexter, I swear to Moses. Ford: Even after a decade apart. Admit it, you missed me so much. Stan: *rolls his eyes* Of course I did. Stan: Stan: But the real reason that's his middle name is because he was conceived at Stanford University. Ford: I- Ford: I really didn't want to know or think about that.

The End... Go home.

[cartoonsinthemorning]

I really like your marchil and stancest arts! Do you have any opinions on toudencest (laios x falin)?

Thank you so much! Anon, let's officially connect the suspicious dots, because I ship Toudencest hard, and I do have, in fact, a lot of opinions. Most likely, the unpopular kind. But before I go into my deranged details rant, here, have a sketch.

Ok, let's go! Laios and Falin have the BEST relationship in Dunmeshi. They understand each other like no other does. It was used as a gag, but: the party getting mad at Laios for saying 'hadn't Falin got eaten, they would have never savored the delicious exorcism sorbet'...and Laios thinks to himself Falin would had understood what he meant-- OOHHH that hit my heart so hard!! That scene meant so much to me! It's TRUE. Everyone, even his friends, misunderstand Laios constantly. But Falin would understand him. It's beautiful. It moves me. Another thing that shakes me to the core: Falin is the only one showing genuine excitement about Laios' passions, interests and discoveries. Like, what I mean is, Senshi does share with Laios an interest about making monster's edible, and later on basically everyone in the story gets mind-boggled about how useful Laios' bizarre knowledge can be- BUT! she is the only one that geeks out with him about monsters. And not out of functionality. No, she's genuinely excited about him sharing new knowledge with her. When she's brought back to life and Laios tells her about monster-eating, her first reaction is basically jumping up and down, overjoyed.

And this is so downplayed. How similar they are, in this regard, I mean. Because most people portray Falin as a poised, soft-spoken normal girl, who's got this unhinged monster-fucker as a brother- ahah- and they seem to forget she is HIGHLY weird too, that her interest and methods are VERY unconventional too! Did people miss the flashback episode showing how she did homework in magic school, basically going into wild, forbidden areas to be in direct contact with the creatures living in there, even if it's considered dangerous, almost blasphemous? COME ON, Laios and Falin share the same approach, no wonder they are best friends! People tend to downplay it, I think, because Laios is the one getting gag-worthy reactions from people- getting yelled at, glared at, etc. But in fact, Falin is just as weird as he is. And it's so sweet how that brings them together, even when they are apart... I also think the fandom largely downplays how much of a bro-con Falin is: she was so clingy as a child lmao, but seriously, she was heartbroken when Laios left home without her- and the thing is, you would expect, after she grew up some more and went to study magic, things would change, her priorities would change. BUT NOOOO, no Sir: Laios pops into her life again years later out of the blue and she drops everything to run away with him. GOD that's so ROMANTIC, she is in LOVE, she is down SO BAD for Laios. What would I give for a detailed fan fic about their travels alone together. Sigh. I think I'm gonna end it here because I went well off the rails-- BUT ONE MORE THING!!! When she was a child and she SO PROUDLY bragged how good her brother is at imitating a dog's bark. God. God my heart. her love is so sweet so precious so immaculate so pure. Ok now I'm done for real byeeeee

[embroiderling]

Embroidery for the @monsterfucktoberbingo - Square: Cyborg.

Original artwork by @designtheendless (which is art for A Waking Nightmare by the amazing @kydrogendragon)

Ok, a note for this one. First, of course I know that people in wheelchairs are not monsters. This is a free interpretation of the prompt. I think that's pretty obvious, but just in case.

And keep reading for a few words about being disabled, pain and mental health.

I was talking with my friends from the discord Dreamling con Ñ about the definition of cyborg —a creature composed of organic elements and cybernetic devices usually intended to enhance the capabilities of the organic part through the use of technology.

We were thinking about Dream or Hob with an orthopaedic leg or arm, but we didn't find any Sandman drawing like that (I hope someone do it, because it deserves representation!) And then I remembered this beautiful art. So we have Hob here, using a kind of technology that helps with his organic living...

I had an accident two months ago. I had to wear an orthopaedic boot for a month because I wasn't able to walk without risking worsening my injury. My body had to learn to walk differently, and I went (still go) through a lot of pain because my body posture changed and I lost muscle strength in my legs. My sense of balance was affected and I still walk like a pirate —quite useful for a costume party. I had 30 kinesiology sessions (and there'll be more). Rehabilitation isn't linear. There are ups and downs. One day you get up and feel like new. And the next 5 days you feel terrible. And when the body hurts, it's easier for the mind to hurt, too.

As you might suspect, this isn't about me. This is about anyone reading this who isn't having a good day/week/year/life. Life isn't linear, and I can't promise you that everything will be fine, but I can tell you that tomorrow will be a different day. That you're not alone. And you are loved. If you feel like the sadness won't leave home, ask for help. If you think someone you love is feeling that way, try to be there because maybe that person doesn't have the energy needed to ask for help.

Please, be safe. Take care of yourself. You're loved. And the world is better because you're here.

[shadow1515]

Too Sweet

Pairing: The Ghoul | Cooper Howard/Female, Surface Reader Word Count: 5,138 Warnings: a lot, rape/non-con, older man (he’s a zombie basically)/younger woman (reader is 20), monster fucking, size kink, rough sex, gun play, blood kink, glove kink?, loss of virginity, dacryphilia, forced orgasm, orgasm denial, creampie Summary: Your father dead, brother gone in search for his killers, mother gone in search for him, you were left alone in the wilderness. You thought you knew how to take care of yourself, but that idea is challenged when a certain ghoul in a cowboy hat shows up at your dining room table. Tags: DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT. READ THE WARNINGS. DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ. MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY. Please, read the warnings, if any of this triggers you do not continue!!!!!!!!!! Note: first post here, but i also posted on ao3 where i have posted fics before... just... bear with me, the brain rot was real for this one. I have never written anything at this level of depravity but this yucky looking man without a nose took hold of me and I had to write this. I did most of it when I should have been studying for a quiz, but it's fineeeee. Anyway, please enjoy this 5k word piece of filth that was only read through once…… (And yes the title is based off Hozier’s song Too Sweet.)

You were born and raised on the surface with its sandy horizons and burning sun, but your life was definitely better than most others who live on the surface of this godforsaken world. Your parents had found a nice place with tons of supplies, the ability to grow plants, a water filter, and it was hidden fairly well. You weren’t entirely sure how they had found such a haven in the wasteland, but honestly you couldn’t complain too much. Alongside your older brother, you grew up knowing how to grow your own food, hunt, defend yourself, create booby traps, the normal things every kid grew up learning. You were also one of the lucky few that was taught how to read and write as your mother had been taught by her parents and passed it onto you and your brother, something you were forever grateful for. 

Books were a solace for you, one of the few you could find, especially after your brother ran off to god knows where and your mother went off in search of him just a few months ago. After your father passed away three years ago, your brother felt it necessary to be the “man of the house” and make sure you and your mother were taken care of. It wasn’t that you were ungrateful for his protection and watchful eye, but he could be a little extreme at times. Your father died just over a year ago, and it was hard on all of you. Perhaps your brother took it a bit harder since he never showed his sadness about it… only his anger. See, your father was killed by some raiders on one of his outings to get more supplies. Your brother was with him when it happened but managed to escape. You were almost one hundred percent sure that was where your brother had gone; looking for your father’s killers.

Unfortunately, that had been just over four months ago. A few days ago your mother grew sick of it and went to try and find your brother, leaving you all alone. You knew how to protect yourself and make sure the house was protected and hidden, but that didn’t mean you liked being alone or that you didn’t worry every day about your missing family. In fact, it made it worse.

You felt your patience and sanity wearing thin as the days went on and you heard nothing from your mother or brother. You were worried sick, the only things keeping you from running off by yourself were tending to the farm and the chickens, checking on the water filter, reading your books, really anything to distract you from the inevitable truth;that your family was dead. 

One day, you were out tending to the livestock and farms for most of the day. It was starting to get dark and mostly everything was done, so it was about time to head inside for the night. As soon as you opened the door, you could tell something was off. Maybe it was the slightly larger, sandy footprints through the hallway, or the way that everything around you seemed to stand still, either way you knew something was wrong. Unfortunately, you weren’t quick enough. Even with your added paranoia from being alone for a few days, your reflexes couldn’t have prepared you enough for the sight of a man… no, a ghoul, lounging at your dining table. Seat pulled back, feet on the table, fingers lazily playing with the trigger of the sawed off shotgun that was pointed directly at you. 

Part of his face was obscured by a ragged hat, but you could still tell that he was a ghoul, his face covered in scars, red and shiny from the radiation. He slowly lifted his head, dark eyes shining in the setting sun streaming through the window, the black hole where his nose should have been even more prominent as his gaze slowly trailed from your muddy boots up your bare legs (you wanted to wear shorts, it was hot out), across your curves until they finally landed on your face, lingering on your parted lips for a moment too long in your opinion. 

Your eyes, on the other hand, kept on moving between his ruined face to the gun pointed at you in quick succession, not knowing which to focus on more. Before you could think of doing anything else, he finally spoke.

“Well, sweetheart, seems you found yourself in quite the predicament here.” The words roll off his tongue easily, like they were practiced, used, normal for him to utter. That nickname too, so antagonizing and belittling with just two syllables. It made your blood boil… not like that… right?

You attempted to speak, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water, your eyes still flicking between the barrel of the gun and the ruined face before you. Your very apparent lack of thoughts and speech only made the ghoul chuckle. It was a deep sound, like a rumble of the earth during a thunderstorm, the vibrations running all through your body, unyielding to the forces that surround you. 

“Cat got your tongue, darlin’?”

The question was not meant to be answered, in fact it made all semblance of words leave your mouth entirely. He stood up then, the spurs on his boots startling you as he took step after step closer to you, the gun in his hand hanging loosely at his side. At first, you didn’t move, but as he got closer, you took a fearful step back, not realizing until it was too late that he maneuvered you in such a way as he was getting closer so now your back was flush against the wall. The ghoul was close now, too close, so close you could feel his body heat, the stench of his breath from his yellowed mouth, the gunpowder and cigarettes and booze that lingered on him like a haze after a fire. He was terrifying. 

You let out a pathetic squeak as the end of his shotgun found its place underneath your chin, tilting your head up to make sure you looked him directly in the eyes. His eyes weren’t an evil yellow or filled with contempt, they were a deep brown, a soft brown, and they were filled with an emotion you really could not place. The position you were in was compromising, with his face inches from your own (his hips inches from your own). And that look in his eyes. Why couldn’t you figure it out?

The cool metal of the gun felt as if it was burning you as he tipped your head back just a bit more, his dark eyes focused on yours, “Ain’t you just a sweet little thing, all alone, no way of protectin’ yourself.” You did have a way of protecting yourself, it was called booby traps that he somehow managed to get by, but you bit your tongue. 

“What do you want with me?” You managed to speak that one question that was burning in your mind in spite of the shivers of fear that ran down your spine as your chin moved the shotgun touching it.

At that little comment from you, the ghoul smirked like the bastard he was, “Well you see, missy,” You felt a surge of relief followed quickly by terror again as the gun left your chin only to trail down your neck and land on the collar of your tank top, a collar that was already pretty low cut (again, it was hot). The barrel caught in the fabric as he continued to speak, “I have it on good information that this little abode of yours happens to also be the home of a stupid boy who crossed paths with the wrong man.”

Your heart sank. You knew exactly what he was referring to. Your fucking brother, off doing who knows what, stirring up the worst kind of trouble. He wanted to avenge your father, you knew that, but did he not think? Of course he didn’t. He thought it would be all unicorns and daisies as he tracked down a pack of murderers. Why would he think twice about the trouble that would bring onto you?

“Look, I–” You gave a dry swallow as the gun at your chest pushed further beneath your shirt, just shy away from tugging it to the side and taking a peek. “You’re looking for my brother, right? I-I don’t know where he is. He left months ago and then my mother–” You cut yourself off, you didn’t want your mother caught up as this bounty hunter’s prey as well.

The ghoul cocked his head to the side, eyes never leaving your face even as the gun moved the fabric of your tank top to the side, your cleavage very obviously there for the looking. “Don’t let me stop you, sweetheart. Please, tell me more about your dear mama.”

You felt the tears on your cheeks before you realized they even formed in the first place. Why did this have to happen? You were blessed, you knew that, with this home and your family, but that didn’t mean you had to have horrible things happen to you as well. You already lost your father, your brother and mother were gone, but you didn’t do anything. 

The ghoul’s gaze followed the tears as they trailed down your face, a twisted pleasure running through him as he watched them. You were too sweet for this world, too sweet for a man like him to find you all alone like this. 

Without much extra thought, you felt the ghoul position his leg between yours, the rough material of his pants around his thigh immediately rubbing against the cloth covering your bottom half. The movement caught you off guard and another gasp of surprise left your mouth, a fresh wave of tears trailing down your face. So that was what he wanted… Growing up you learned what it was that made babies, the simple things like that, but you were sheltered, never leaving your home or the confines of your land, much preferring to stay with your family and not venture out into the dangerous unknown. And it was made dangerous because men, of things, like him.

“Awh, what is it, darlin’?” You heard the gun click into its holster at his side, one hand moving to grip your hip with a strength that really shouldn’t have shocked you, the other moving towards your face, his gloved thumb swiping at the tears gathering there. You mewled again as his thigh moved, the rough fabric causing unwanted friction in an unwanted place. “You scared of little ol’ me?”

“Please,” The fear you felt before only grew as the realization dawned on you. He wanted information and he knew the only way of getting it out of you would be to hurt you… but that didn’t have to mean just cuts and bruises, especially for a man like him. “Please don’t do this. I- I don’t know anything else.” 

You knew it was a lie, he knew it was a lie. You just wanted to protect your mother, and maybe you could convince him of that. At least, you hoped you could. 

The ghoul moved the hand on your face down, resting on the collar of your shirt, “Sweetheart, you really don’t know how the world works out there, do ya?” His face moved closer to yours, his breath hot against the shell of your ear, “It’s eat or be eaten, darlin’, and you ain’t telling me what I wanna know.”

“But-” You hiccuped as fresh tears left your eyes, “But I don’t know anythi–”

A sharp gasp that bordered on a scream escaped you as the hand at your hip left to join the other one and a loud ripping sound invaded your senses, your tank top now ripped clean down the middle, exposing your breasts to him.

Damn, your skin was so soft. Not a scar on your body, just some dirt and scrapes from working outside. The sweat from the sun still lingered on your skin, making it glow, and that scent, it alone was enough to make a ghoul go feral. But he could stave off that feeling if he found a way to get rid of it. 

The ghoul’s eyes found yours again in spite of your breasts being right there. “Sweet thing,” God you hated how small his nicknames made you feel. “I don’t think you’re understandin’ still. I got a bounty to find, you know how to find ‘em, and, well, I know a fun way to get it outta ya.” 

At that last comment you felt the rough leather of his gloves finally touch your breast, squeezing and toying with them in a way you never thought possible. His hands were everywhere, twisting, rough, strong, it made your skin sweat and your back arch. You whimpered as he tugged at your nipples, the pain mixed with a different feeling, one that didn’t feel that bad. As your back arched, your hips unintentionally bumped against his and you felt something hard poke at you. Your eyes widened in shock, the nice feeling from before immediately dissipating as your situation dawned on you again. With that thought, a renewed vigor filled you, your hand clenching in a fist that was raised and swung at the monster’s face. 

Your punch landed with a loud thud but to your horror he didn’t even flinch, just stopped his ministrations on your breasts to glare at you, his anger radiating off of him in waves. 

A cruel smirk grew on his scarred face, “There’s that fight I was looking for.”

His sentence was punctuated with a harsh slap across your face, the force making your vision blink out for a couple of seconds as your head swung to the side. You tasted blood in your mouth and felt a strong hand grip your jaw, harshly moving your head so that it faced him again. 

“You wanna try that again, sweetheart, or are ya gonna tell me what I wanna know?”

Despite your fear and the knowledge that this man, this ghoul, could kill you in a matter of seconds, it would take more than that to get you to give up your mother and brother to him. With that thought in mind, you gathered up some of the blood in your mouth and spit at him, the red liquid splattering over his already reddened face. 

The hand at your jaw moved to grip your throat, squeezing just enough to cause discomfort and fear that he could do much worse. You watched in horror as his free hand then moved to gather up some of the blood on his face, the finger now sticky and shiny with it moving to his mouth as he licked it clean, a face of pure pleasure overcoming him as he tasted you. 

“You taste sweeter than apple pie,” Your throat was squeezed tighter as his face grew closer to yours, his missing nose making it easier to invade your space. “And that just makes me wanna taste you even more.”

His head immediately moved to your neck where you felt his hot breath on your shoulder, his hand moved to grab at your face to keep you from moving. You squirmed in his grasp as you felt a rough tongue drag against your skin, the feeling foreign to you. It seemed like he really was tasting you, licking at the sweat and grime that coated your skin, savoring the taste. Your body tried to wriggle free, a scream warbled by the grip he had on your cheeks as you felt the blunt ends of his teeth bite deep into the juncture of your shoulder and neck. The force in which he bit down was sure to leave a mark, the abused flesh turning red and irritated almost immediately. 

You wanted to pass out right then and there, your mind racing with thoughts of what he might do to you next. He lingered at your neck for a moment before giving it one last swipe of his tongue and returning to look you dead in the eyes, a wicked smile on his scarred skin. Your face was smushed together by his gloved hand and you watched as his gaze traveled back to your neck, back to the mark he left there. His hand quickly followed that gaze, trailing over the mark before gripping your throat again. You saw as the thoughts and emotions raced behind his eyes but you didn’t know where they would lead.

Without any more warning, the ghoul used the hand on your throat to swing you around, slamming your back onto the table. You tried to get out from under him, swinging your arms and legs wildly, screaming (not that anyone would hear you), trying to land a punch or a kick, anything to get away. The ghoul grabbed a hold of your wrists in one hand, pinning them to the table above your head as his free hand went to his waist, grabbing the shotgun from its holster and pointing at your face once again. 

Your struggle stopped the moment you heard the holster pop open, your terror growing tenfold as you knew at this distance, one simple slip of his finger would cause your entire head to explode off your body. The ghoul’s smirk was horrible, devilish, and it turned your blood ice cold. He moved the barrel of the gun closer to you until it brushed against your pursed lips still stained red from your blood.

You knew what he wanted you to do, but you couldn’t, the thought making you want to die on the spot. The ghoul didn’t seem to like that, though, the barrel pushing against your lips more roughly.

“Open wide, darlin’” His voice was dark, gravely, filled with irritation but also wild interest, or perhaps lust. “You really don’t wanna make me even more angry.”

You looked deep into his eyes, the flakes of red across his face from your blood making him appear even more frightening, even more like a monster only seen in children’s stories. You knew if you hesitated any longer he’d be more than happy to pull the trigger and blow your head clean off. Your vision grew blurry as more tears formed, your mouth opening just the slightest amount to allow for the gun to slide past your lips. The taste of metal and gunpowder made you want to gag, your eyes finding the dark ones above you as a slow exhale of breath left the ghoul’s mouth, his gaze transfixed on the way his gun slid deep into your mouth.

“Ain’t that a sight,” He spoke in a low tone, voice filled with fascination.

The gun moved deeper into your mouth, the taste giving way to pain as it pushed against the back of your throat, your mouth wrapping painfully around it, stretching it in uncomfortable ways. You felt it begin to leave your mouth before pushing back in, the slow fucking of your throat by a gun making your tears only increase, the gaging sensation becoming more prominent. You tried to move your arms, to get the gun out of your mouth, but his grip was too strong, his fascination with the scene he created too enticing for him to stop. You felt a hard poke against your thighs as they draped over the end of the table and were pinned by the ghoul’s strong body. You continued to gag around the gun as he fucked it faster and rougher into your face, his breaths becoming louder above you. The hard poke from before rubbed against your thigh as he continued, unprovoked, or perhaps more enticed by your tears and the pathetic sounds attempting to leave around the thick barrel of his gun.

“It’s a damn good thing you ain’t out in the real world, pretty lady. You woulda been eaten right up the moment someone laid eyes on ya.” 

His final comment was finished as the gun was shoved further down your throat, a garbled scream rising from you only to be smothered by the metal. He finally removed the weapon from your mouth, saliva making the metal glisten in the dying light from the sun outside. Your cheeks felt burning hot, covered in your tears and sweat as you were given some reprieve from his assault. 

The ghoul looked over his gun, that same bastardly smirk still prominent on his face as he placed it back in its holster, leaving your spit still on it. “Now that was fun, wasn’t it sweetheart,” You tried to glare at him, but didn’t dare speak, your mouth too sore and abused. Your small fight made the ghoul chuckle again, the hand holding your wrists dragging you up from the table with a harsh yank. His face was inches from yours again as he held you in the air, the only thing keeping you from falling was his grip on your hands and his hips digging into yours against the table. “Wanna tell me where you dear mama is now?”

So this torture was still to get information out of you. You loved your mother, you couldn’t bear the thought of giving her up so easily just to save your own skin. 

“Fuck you.” Your voice was strained, your throat throbbing in pain at each syllable. 

“I hoped you’d say that.” With a shove, he threw you to the floor, moving to stand over you. With your limbs finally free, you scrambled to get away, but he was too quick, one heeled boot slamming down on your leg with enough force to stun you. You screamed out in pain, eyes going wide as you watched him reach for his belt, foot still pressed against your leg, keeping you from moving. His hands worked slowly, the terror building up in you at each passing second. His belt came off far too quickly followed by the button of his pants. 

You closed your eyes, not wanting to see where this was going. You heard the rustle of fabric as the ghoul removed his foot from your leg and went to straddle you, strong thighs on either side of your hips, one hand slammed against the floor beside your head, the other grabbing your jaw in a vice-like grip. 

“Eyes on me, sweetheart,” You hesitated before giving in as his grip strengthened to the point of pain, making you gasp and your eyes fly open. “I want you to watch as I ruin you.”

The tears never seemed to stop, his hand leaving your jaw only to rip your shorts and panties down your legs in one harsh tug, the fabric burning against your too sensitive skin. You didn’t dare look down, your gaze staying fixed on his, hoping that if you didn’t look then it wasn’t actually going to happen. 

In spite of your prayers, you felt the rough leather of a gloved finger run through your folds, a sharp intake of breath the only sound you made. Your attempts at staying quiet were soon overcome as his finger found that secret spot just at the top of your cunt, the roughness of the glove and the fear that was coursing through your blood made it even more sensitive and a small mewl of discomfort left your lips. 

The ghoul continued to rub at your clit, your thighs beginning to shake, the sounds escaping your throat enough to make your skin boil in shame. “C’mon, pretty lady, do ya really wanna make this harder on yourself?” He went to whisper in your ear again, his fingers working magic against you. “I can make this feel so good for ya, just tell me what I wanna hear.”

Your hips began to buck against his hand, your moans growing louder as his thumb remained on your clit, one finger entering your cunt and it was like you were seeing stars. You had never done anything like this before, never really had the chance to. You experimented by yourself of course, but having someone else do it to you? It was on a whole other level. 

You chased your peak like it was the only thing standing in the way of your survival, your hips shaking, mouth agape, eyes still fixed on the dark ones above you. You were so close. You could feel it building, boiling over–

A pathetic cry left you as he removed his hand, bringing it up to his face as he inspected the wetness now coating his fingers. With that same hand he gripped your cheeks, your own fluids coating your face, the scent invading your senses. 

“I said I could make ya feel good, but you haven’t given me anythin’ in return yet.” His tone was so cocky, so arrogant, and yet it sent warmth shooting down to your core, unbidden and unwelcome to your mind, but it was received with exaltation as it fueled the slowly dying fire within you. 

“Please–” It was pathetic, you knew that, and you weren’t even sure what you were saying please to, please stop, please don’t stop, please let me come mr ghoul sir?

Your desire was partially snuffed out as you felt something large and warm slap against your stomach. The suddenness of it made you forget to not look down as your gaze landed on the ghoul’s cock. It was big, the skin red and irritated, scarred from the radiation, just like the rest of his body. As much as the pleasure he was giving you before felt amazing, you couldn’t take that thing. 

“That can’t fit,” You spoke hurriedly, the fear taking hold once more. “Please, I-I don’t know anything! I can’t help you, just please don’t put that in me.” Your sobs grew hysterical, tears free flowing, incoherent mumbles leaving you. “Sweetheart, you really think I care?” 

He was cruel, he was a monster, a horrible, despicable monster.

The ghoul reached for his discarded belt, using it to tie your wrists together above your head as you tried to squirm away from him again. And you watched in terror as one of his hands guided the head of his cock to hit against your opening, the other hand roaming down your neck to grab at your breasts again. The tip of him tried to get inside of you and you already felt like you would die right there.

“Fuck, sweetheart, you are tight.” His gaze left his cock and moved to look at you again, “You never been fucked before, have ya?”

Your blabberings and the fear in your eyes was enough of an answer for him. “Damn, didn’t think I’d find a cunt as sweet as yours in this place.” He finally managed to push in, the pain was horrible, it made your insides burn, your mind going blank. “Makes me wanna stay here just a bit longer, still gotta know where your little shit of a brother is afterall.”

Your mind was gone, overcome with pain as he pushed more of his length into you, heedless of your squirming, your tears, the resistance he felt as he kept on going deeper and deeper. 

It was horrible, you were glad your brain tried to block out other thoughts, albeit in vain as he pulled out just to slam back into you, fully sheathed in your tight cunt. 

“You’re gripping me like a vice, darlin’, I dunno if I can even get out.” He gave a soft chuckle at that, punctuated with a sharp tug from your warmth only to shove it back in at a brutal pace. 

You couldn't take it, couldn’t comprehend how this was happening to you. Distantly, you heard as his gloves came off, the rough skin of his fingers grabbing your hip with enough strength to form bruises while the other other arm braced against the floor beside your head, using it as leverage to rut into you. Your legs were splayed around his, your back scraping against the wooden floor, digging sharp lines into your skin. 

You could faintly hear quiet sounds escape the man above you as he fucked you, his arms moving to grab your legs, bending them until your knees were beside your head, allowing him to reach even deeper into you. The head of his cock felt like a nail was being hammered into your cervix with each thrust. Your glazed eyes wandered down to see where you were joined and a jolt of horror ran through you. Each time he rammed into you, your belly bulged up a bit, it was like he was rearranging your insides to make more room for him. 

The ghoul’s gaze followed yours and a louder grunt left him, one hand leaving your leg to press against the bulge on your belly. “Darlin’, you’re just too good for this fucked up world.”

The house was filled with the noises of flesh meeting flesh, your eyes were blank, staring up at the ceiling his thrusts continued. You didn’t want to think, to feel, to exist anymore. But the ghoul has other plans. Your face scrunched up as you felt a textured finger find your clit once more, rubbing it in all the right ways to make your mind snap back into focus. The pleasure was building again, each snap of his hips mixed with the bundle of nerves at your center being played with and you were reaching that peak again. Your moans intermingling with the slapping of flesh on flesh, you didn’t want to reach that crest and fall over it, you didn’t want this encounter to feel good for you too, but by god it did.

Your voice was raw as it screamed out, your pleasure pushed over the edge as you came, your thighs coating with your fluids, the noises becoming even more obscene as he continued to fuck you harder and faster.

“Goddamn, you are just too fucking good.”

His hands gripped your hips as his pace quickened but lost its rhythm. You knew he was getting close and the overstimulation of being fucked through and beyond your orgasm was making it hard to think of anything other than him. His hips finally stopped pistoning into you, giving one last, rough thrust as something hot and sticky filled you up, leaking out around his cock that remained in you. 

The ghoul braced his hands on either side of your head, his eyes zeroed in on yours, breath heavy, sweat on his brow. “You gonna help me out now, sweetheart?”

Your head lolled to the side, eyes closing as you passed out. 

[return-of-a-space-cowboy]

🧚‍♀️ Anon

I have spiders on the brain, help (I’m thinking about Driders, lots and LOTS of them) 😭

Drider Johnathan would be so scary, mating season is coming and he’s busy with preparations as he wants everything to be perfect only to be surprised to see a Human! (He’s only ever seen Males) So he begins to quietly stalk until he gets the chance to pounce his next prey!

Only to be surprised that this human is a Woman! (He becomes embarrassed and begins to apologize as he’s never encountered a ‘Young Lady’, showing his gentleman side)

He ignores Darlings struggles as he takes her to his den to make it up to her with some supper and to check to see if he accidentally harmed her (He becomes fascinated by how small and dainty she is compared to him and his kind, as Females are known for being bigger, but he’s an exception since he’s as big as a female *Real Spider Biology, in most species the Females are mainly bigger than the males*)

OR

Darling and Drider Johnathan met when they were children?

Darling got lost in the woods, only to be found by Johnathan (Who was only a bit bigger than her) who wants to help her because he’s trying to become a Gentleman!

Darling was fascinated by his appearance as she’s never met a someone with so many legs! (They’re covered in blue fluff)

Darling and Johnathan became friends during the years, with JoJo getting big and strong as an Ox (Keeping their friendship a secret) as he gifted her many animal pelts during the years as well as offerings of food like meat and berries (As part of a mating ritual)

However when Johnathan learns Darling is engaged and getting married he becomes upset (No doubt thinking she’s being married against her will) so he intends to find the man and get rid of him (Turn him into his dinner) and take Darling away and off into his Burrow (A big cave) where they can start a family together!

I can see Johnathan be a Goliath Birdeater as a Drider (As well as Joseph and Jotaro being Goliath Birdeaters too because of their size)

I’m having another weird idea for a Drider Johnathan or Risotto (I’m picturing Risotto as a Great Huntsman Spider for a Drider)

Oh boy, one thing about. I hate spiders, too many close calls with spiders. And huntsmans, don't even get me started with those bastards who just like to drop right in front of you for no reason.

But I love my monsters!

I can't say much on species as even looking at pictures gives me goosebumps.

Warnings: NSFWish, non con elements, Somnophilia

I like the first idea of him seeing darling in the middle of the forrest. Now I propose a language barrier. He sees that darling has already been injured and takes her back with him. He's trying to calm her down as he takes her back to his den but she doesn't understand a word he's saying and vice versa.

Only when he uses his webbing to close up a big cut does she somewhat understand what's going on. Still she's terrified.

She does through her hiking bag to grab her phone only to find it smashed beyond function. Eventually she offers dried berries to try and gauge his temperament. Unfortunately he takes this as a sign of courtship. He denys them as darling needs them to heal up, but inside he's a giddy mess to have such a cute human propose to him. He's working like crazy on preparing his den for her as well as making sure she's healthy.

Then one night he undresses her and wraps her tightly into his web while she sleeps, something that was customary due to how aggressive female driders could be, not that he was afraid of her hurting him.

He takes his time to trail his hands over her, admiring her form. If any of his kind found out about this he'd be labeled a creep but he didn't care.

[flippinpancakes64]

Hey, idk if you've written this yet but how do you think the Cullen's would feel about turning their SO into a vampire?

The Cullens turning their S/O

I haven't done this yet so don't worry. I did something similar for my first post but that was the Cullens with a Newborn

Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!

Edward:

Absolutely fucking not

You saw how much convincing it took for him to turn Bella

And that was after she almost died like 20 times

So if you're perfectly healthy, not in any immediate danger, and doing well in your life then he is not touching a single hair on your head

He won't do it

Of course, we have also seen that he can be convinced

I think with enough pushing and maybe one or two near death experiences you could negotiate something

Now if you're about to die?

He doesn't even hesitate

Well actually he does

But only for a little bit

You're dying, he needs to help you

He is so apologetic though

He feels like a monster for weeks

Or maybe even years

For as long as you're going through the newborn process he is tearing himself up on the inside

He legitimately wants to die he feels so bad

But he does get over himself lol

He has pretty good self control overall so as far as the actual process of turning you it would be pretty smooth

In general, though, he wouldn't want to do it

He's scared of killing you, of losing control, of you hating him, of everything that could go wrong

He's gonna need a while to be okay after you get turned

But he'll come around :)

Alice:

She doesn't remember her human life

As a result she doesn't feel too connected to humanity

So there's a pretty good chance that she would turn you if you asked her

Of course not before some arguing

While she doesn't feel connected to humanity, that doesn't mean that she wants to strip you of yours

But she is just a twinge selfish

It wouldn't take too much convincing for her to change you

She loves you and wants to spend eternity with you

She explains her challenges and gets Carlisle to weigh in with the pros and cons

But she would turn you

And if it was a life-or-death scenario?

Absolutely no hesitation

Maybe she saw that it was about to happen and couldn't stop it or for some reason she didn't see it

All she knows is that you are on the ground dying and she NEEDS to save you

She feels bad afterwards when she sees all of the pain that you're in

But she can also see that you'll be fine in a couple months

She just encourages you to be strong and wait it out

Is there for you every step of the way though

Jasper:

There's actually zero chance

He hates newborns

And he doesn't trust them

And he knows the pain

He remembers seeing other newborns writhing in pain, he remembers his own transformation, and he would never inflict that upon you

He cannot be convinced

Similarly to Edward, if you are happy, healthy, and content, he will not turn you

But there's no negotiation

Like end of story

He won't do it

Now if you're in danger and about to die, he'll do it

Actually he won't

He'll get Carlisle or Edward or literally anyone else to do it

He doesn't trust himself

He is convinced that he will kill you if he tries

And in his defense he probably would

But he is beside you every step of the way afterwards

He's very wary of you, though

Does his best to keep you calm and make sure you don't hurt anyone

Also feels very guilty

Even if he's not the one who made you

He feels like it's his fault

Rosalie:

Again, she wouldn't change you

We all know how she feels about humans being turned

She's probably the one who would be the least likely to do it

So again, if you're healthy and not on the verge of death, she will not change you

And it's sort of the same story when you're about to die

In a lot of ways, she wishes she had died instead of being turned

Now instead of being able to move on, she has to live with her regrets and with the fact that she will never be human

But she's a little too selfish for that

If somehow she managed to fall in love with you even though you were a human, that means she must REALLY love you

She spends so much time deliberating with herself that she has to turn you herself

Breaking her "never tasted human blood" streak

She gets a bit upset at that but she gets over it

She keeps debating with herself even after you've been turned

She's convinced that you must hate her now and that surely you want to be dead right now

And she feels terrible for having been the one to do it

But it's okay you have eternity to convince her that she made the right choice

Emmett:

He's another one who would just do it

The whole reason he was turned in the first place was because Rosalie fell in love with him

And so he figures that you being in love with him and him being in love with you is a good enough reason

You don't really have to beg him

He will insist that you know all of the risks first

He'll ask Carlisle for some tips on how to change you safely

And boom all done

But if you were about to die?

Same thing I guess

Literally no hesitation

Well actually let me back up

If someone or something attacked you he is killing their ass first

Doesn't matter who or what it was

Now if it was an accident or something he just goes to you straight up

No detours

I feel like he would struggle a bit with turning you

Right after he was turned the Cullens had to move multiple times in the span of a couple years because he kept getting out of control

So if he didn't have the time to properly prepare I feel like it might not end well

Hopefully for your sake Carlisle's there...

Esme:

She's another one whose life has only been improved by being turned

She was always captivated by vampires

And she didn't really have a happy life leading up to her death

So for her, one of the best things that's ever happened to her was being turned

Now, that does not translate directly to her turning you, no questions asked

Even though she loves her new life, she knows Rosalie's and Jasper's stories

And she wants you to think about it

You would have to ask her pretty consistently for at least a couple of years before she would say yes

She needs to know that you are absolutely sure

And that you know what you're agreeing to

So after a while you could get her to agree to it

Now in a life or death of course she would turn you

That is the exact scenario that Carlisle found her in

And she sees it as okay to turn someone then

She honestly might ask Carlisle to do it

When you're already in such a fragile state she doesn't want to jeopardize you even more

She doesn't really feel bad either way after you've been turned

As in like with herself

Obviously she feels bad seeing you in pain

But she doesn't feel like a monster or anything

You asked for this

Carlisle:

The man, the myth, the legend

He is responsible for turning at least four vampires

So he totally could

But if you're perfectly healthy then he's not going to

His moral compass is too high

I mean, his pattern is only turning people that are about to die

So good luck trying to convince this guy

Now if you ARE about to die...

Well then you have the perfect guy

Does not hesitate at all

He knows what to do, how to do it, and the best way to go about it

And who knows maybe he might get the morphine right this time (sorry Bella)

Very attentive after you've been turned

He knows everything that you need and is very patient

Another one who doesn't really carry the mental burden of turning you

You were about to die, he saved you

He does of course feel bad if you struggle more than normal with being turned

Or if you express hatred with some new aspects of yourself

But he does his best to be there for you and reassure you

Vampire! Bella:

So

She's got a bit of a complex

Before she got turned, she heard all of these horror stories about newborns

And then she got turned

And she didn't feel any of it

Logically, she knows it's because of her shield

But it doesn't stop her from thinking that surely it can't be that bad

That coupled with the fact that she LOVES her new vampire life

And that she hated being human

She doesn't hesitate

If you were to literally even mention it in passing that you wanted to be turned you are bitten that very night

#1 Enabler

And it's the same scenario if you were about to die

She loves you

Of course she's not gonna let you die

She does feel really bad though once she sees you struggling

Like if you're not adapting well or if you show obvious longing for your old life

She feels really bad

And she tells you that

Just give her a couple kisses and tell her that you love her

[worldsokayestmagicalgirl]

The first batch of pictures for Amoré's character journal are here! Also I have been so super sick that I've literally had nothing to do but to work on this for like almost 2 weeks so...

The cover to cover tour officially starts here. All I can say about the front & back is that I lament my lack of experience with my Cricut when I made these decals. I only had 2 "fun" colors to work with at the time & I was still getting comfortable drawing in Procreate, so my silhouette art leaves a lot to be desired compared to some stuff I've made recently. I also found it's incredibly easy to burn this leather book.

But she's volume one, everything with her is a learning experience, & I realized as much as it helps to have a mini heat press for tight corners & small spaces, the cloth barrier they suggest you use between the vinyl & the iron tends to make things harder to press on this scale. So instead I gotta quickly tap straight on the transfer film & hope I don't burn anything around it :(´◦ω◦｀):ﾟﾟ

So at the risk of thoroughly exposing my inner theater kid, Amoré set the precedent with how I went forward creating campaign characters. I started off collecting 5 songs to make a mini story arc (almost like a show choir set list 🙃) that helps me figure out an outline for the kind of story I wanna give them.

Somehow Amoré ended up with a truly horrendous blend of rock & theatre. Absolutely incredibe. No wonder she's always such a dramatic bitch.

It was a lot easier to go in & add little decals around these lyrics. I'm definitely cursed with the Too Much™ gene, but I enjoy the little pops of color they give ✨ plus it justifies me hoarding all these vinyl scraps printing stuff this small lol.

Stat sheet!

In all honesty, as my first character I had no fucking clue what I was doing when I placed these & if I could go back & change one thing I'd probably swap her Intelligence & her Wisdom. She’s definitely more people smart than book smart.

But everything else is...very accurate. She has all the upper body strength of a chicken nugget. Plus on top of the (already) negative I traded disadvantage on everything DEX for magic crystal shoes that can be periodically harvested. Just a way for her to carry around the family fortune without actually having to return to the vault✨

For something that started so average, her CON became a monster & always comes in clutch for her alcohol tolerance. I've played variations of her across a few different one shots & I always manage to roll well for anything alcohol related. The dice do respect a bit 🤣

Spells on the other hand, I floundered with a lot at first because we’re not a combat heavy game, but then I found Chaos Bolt & that was that. It’s essentially Amoré in spell form & I’ve had a ton of fun with it over the years. Also Mage Armor cuz my girl is SO DISTRESSINGLY SQUISHY.

Cantrips were more or less a bit of a toss up. Message was fun for the sheer idea of her using it to talk shit during social events without being caught. But aside from Light serving fun backstory purposes the other 3 are kinda just what looked fun ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ unless you count the idea that she would absolutely delight in zapping handshakes.

From there, I wanted to extend the world map made by our wonderful DM @cappierong into a full scroll. Ya know, for the aesthetic ✨

Our campaign started in Civania, where Amoré's main Estate is. I just wanted a quick mock up to reference, so I edited a preexisting picture I found that checked all the boxes (large, on a plateau, accessible only by bridge) and then absolutely smothered it in flowers.

But anyways... This is primarily where Diana & Amoré grew up together in their decade of backstory ✨

There was probably waaaay to much back & forth trying to keep the continuity between stuff I've already drawn & this big reference. But I think it turned out pretty ok? Not like if I make a mistake anyone will really know lol.

Scaling was also another big issue I had, & I moments where I thought something was too big I just kinda handwaved it away like "ehhhhh she's from a stupid rich family." But now I have a NEED to draw baby Diana & Amoré around like, the statue gardens or something cuz I feel like certain parts of this place are definitely ominous 👀 especially for children...

And lastly we have the back cover & the High Noble political relationship map! I normally have this closer to the front but for layout purposes it'll be here. I kinda feel like I need to do more for the decoration of it but I can’t think of anything else to add at the moment.

Sam if u read that no you didn't.

But now! Other than a family portrait that I've always wanted to draw, I think I'm ready to move onto the art for Season 1 : Arc 2. It's a pretty hefty amount of art in comparison to others, so I gotta get busy. Especially since I think I'm gonna have to draw a few comics *sobs*

If you made it this far, thanks so much for reading! I'm always excited to talk out our little idiots so thanks for indulging me ❀(*´▽`*)❀

[not-a-unique-snowflake-blog]

2023 was fun! It’s my first year reading fan fiction so it’s been one of the horniest and the thirstiest years of my life!😁 I found a lot of amazing people here and this hellsite truly became my home in 2023!💖

I want to say ‘thank you’ to people who made this year very special for me and wish them all wonderful 2024!😘 I came up with some categories so here they are!💖

✨The “OMG” fic of the year

This one goes to Promise /a dragon!Ezra x f!reader/ by @criticallyacclaimedstranger I’m a proud monster fucker but holy hell I surprised myself when I loved this fic so much!🥵 it’s hot and also very sweet and beautifully written!😍❤️ After reading it I had long and thorough discussions about the logistics of dragon fucking with a few people and had the best time!😄

✨The series I love with all my heart

Stay In Bed /pre outbreak!joel miller x f!reader, one sided tommy miller x f!reader/ by @psychedelic-ink is amazing, touching and beautiful! I felt a ton of emotions reading about Joel and reader’s journey to each other. Thank you for writing it, Sil!🫶

✨The “I’m too old for this, my heart nearly stopped” fic of 2023

Every Inch pt 3 /m!ghostface x f!reader/ by @toxicanonymity was so hot that it nearly killed me😅I had to open the window to get some fresh air cos reading it made me dizzy with hyperventilation. I survived thus I strongly recommend to TRY THIS AT HOME‼️

✨The loveliest co-writer of 2023

@milla-frenchy my friend, my twin, my co-writer💖 your support gave me confidence to come out with my own writing which wasn’t easy😅 thank you!🫂 It’s always a pleasure to write with you and I hope to continue our creative journey in 2024. I love you, baby! Check out her masterlist! It’s gold!🥵🥵🥵

✨The most unhinged reader

@gracieispunk created a reader so unhinged, badass and hot that she sometimes overshadows Maintenance Man!Joel himself!😍 Tenant Girl takes what she wants and I love her for it‼️💖

✨My man, my love, my everything

Do you have an emotional support character who can make you feel happier, safer, calmer when you simply think about them? I do thanks to @toxicanonymity ! Nightwalks Joel is my most favourite fictional man! The first, the best, the hottest! HELL YEAH!🍆🧎🏼‍♀️🐆

✨“If horrible, why so hot” character

Joel from the Wrong Way series by @romana-after-dark wins this one! This Joel is one of the darkest I’ve ever read and he makes me feral and I love him!😵‍💫🥵

✨The most read fic of 2023

Liquid Gold /Joel Miller x fem!pregnant!reader x Tommy Miller/ by @gasolinerainbowpuddles is my breastfeeding kink Bible and simply an extremely hot fic! no joke I thought of pinning it on my blog cos I searched for it that often. Just thinking about it now makes me feel like a reread is due!😵‍💫🫠

Also thank you, Puddles, for your hilarious memes!😆👏 you’re a treasure!💖

✨The most unique series

Muddy Waters /Ezra x F!Reader x Joel Miller/ by @bonezone44 blew me away this year! Its characters are complex, the plot is fascinating and unique, it’s like a diamond that shines differently when you look at it from a new angle❤️

✨DDDNE fic of the year

Whatever You Want /Comandante Veracruz x Reader/ by @iamasaddie is a non-con masterpiece! It’s not easy to keep the realism of the situation and still make it hot, but this story has a perfect balance of both!🥵🖤

Also Aly, thank for being such a great friend!💖 You’re hilarious, kind, gorgeous and a super talented writer and artist!😍👏 I love you!😘

✨My favourite writer of 2023

I dearly love many writers on this site. But this title goes to @toxicanonymity without a doubt❤️

You made this year for me, Toxy! I’ll never be normal about your writing, your talent, your characters, your kindness, your heart😍 Every series, every story of yours is perfect! Thank you for everything you gave me and all of us this year! I love you, friend!💖🫂😘

✨My favorite people in 2023

My moots, my lovelies, my friends! Y’all made me laugh, cry happy tears, thirst, FEEL things like I’ve never felt before! I LOVE YOU ALL💖 @missannwinchester @milla-frenchy @toxicanonymity @iamasaddie @neverwheremoonchild @lumoverheaven @multiversed-daydreamer @beefrobeefcal @lunitawrites @rubyfruitjungle @xdaddysprincessxx @ellasinnombre @princessanglophile @romanarose @gasolinerainbowpuddles @noxturnalpascal @gracieispunk @ghoulettesinspace @janaispunk @funnygirlthatgab @jupiter-soups @seratuyo

Special smooches to my wifey @missannwinchester who has to deal with my nonsense every single day😅😘😘😘 LOVE YOU, SWEETIE🫂❤️

If you feel you should be on the list and I missed you, you’re absolutely right and I deserve a good spanking for not including you!😏

HAVE AWESOME 2024 Y’ALL!!! WOOOOOO!🥳🎊✨💖💖💖

[kick-a-long]

Forgot to explain antisemitism to my husband for the hours and months and years required for an interfaith relationship before marriage,

But he believes me unconditionally. I’m lucky I picked a good one. We even talked honestly about where we would run to (and what would happen to his law license) which he usually laughs off. The difference this time? He works at a very leftist ngo and has seen the statements his colleagues have been making.

Not all Jewish/goy unions are like this. I’m very very relieved that I got lucky.

For example:

Alice Walker, deeply and unapologetically antisemitic, was not always that way. her first marriage was to a Jewish man who worked in tandem with black organizations to legally dismantle black discrimination in the south. His family hated her for not being Jewish and for being black. They were awful. But their marriage ended many years later when she became very conspicuously antisemitic and refused to listen about its history.

My own mother converted to Judaism and was FAR more observant than my Jewish father but later in life became what I would generously call “Jewish hostile” when their marriage began breaking down.

I always knew there was a possibility of me becoming more Jewish or marriage related friction causing that same kind of situation. But we’ve been married 5 years and together 13. He has spent his time, body and soul helping poor renters protect themselves from being evicted. He doesn’t have illusions about the poor being “innocent victims” or even expecting his clients to be “worthy of help.” Some of them have threatened to kill him, one spent everyday spending hours yelling at him and then got her mother to call to do the same. He doesn’t need “good” clients to help him. I know that he’s a believer that all people are capable of switching between monsters and humans but that doesn’t diminish his work to help the vulnerable. In some ways he has a more Jewish perspective on humanity than I did.

If you’re Jewish and losing friends because they were easily converted into conspiracies and antisemitism try to keep your partner in the loop without letting your anger and suspicion get between you.

If your partner is Jewish and you aren’t, remember there is no Jewish history about finding lasting safety. Believing that you (Jewish) must be kind and respectful of others culture and defending peoples rights and also that at any given moment you (Jewish to any 1/2, 1/4, 1/8, degree) will have to drop everything and RUN because the people you helped, the people you loved, want you dead, are the twin beings inside almost every Jew.

One of the reasons why you don’t see a lot of Jews attacking the character of “good” anti Zionist Jews, is we all get it. They think they can bargain their way out of antisemitism. Just like house slaves that thought they could escape being a “real” slave by fully buying into racism (and maybe getting off on the power of being the slaves elevated by slave owners for hating blackness.)

It’s a lot to ask of any person to “get” the cultural history let alone the cultural trauma they partnered into. Forgive, forget, but don’t be shocked if either of you sounds a little nuts sometimes. I sometimes go full doomsday prepper on him. And he lets peoples shitty behavior slide when I would go full flaming sword. It’s important to remember the daily reality.

Politics is NEVER as important as deep love between two people. It’s essential to remember that and remind loved ones you want to keep of that. Politics is theory and your life together is reality.

I used to like the idea of relationships as romantic and dreamy, now I thank god it’s reality. It’s hard as a rock and just as flexible sometimes. That has its cons but I’ll take every single one for the pros.

Ride or die for each other is what it means. Be ride or die and expect nothing less from any partners in your life. Ask them for it but only if you can truthfully tell them they have it from you. You can’t be the singular unique person that anyone loves if you are only your identity and vise versa.

[cosplayinamerica]

by Anna-Neko

Before all the endless online, digital everything, before FB and Insta, the “don’t u know how many followers…” & influencers nonsense, there was this man!

Kevin would take your photo, make small-talk & drop encouraging comments and make you feel a star! A former cosplay partner still fondly remembers how he would always know what she was cosplaying as! No matter how obscure! If he didn’t know the cosplay – he would ask about it! The interest always genuine. He seemed to remember everyone from con to con, and in later years when instead of running around he would set up a corner with a backdrop and do photos this way – he would jot down file numbers & email me full-size images after the event if asked.

So just a quick scene setting up. It is very easy to forget, but back then (1999 to maybe 2002~ish) there was waaaaay less conventions. There wasn’t an event happening every weekend, much less multiple events at same time! Digital cameras were not a thing. Well, obviously they existed, but your average otaku heading to an anime con might bring a cheap 35mm disposable camera (or maybe 3, if CVS had a multi-pack sale!).

Kevin’s FansView website was THE cosplay/cons site. He updated multiple times throughout the event, 2 or 3 times each day! There weren’t just photos of “hot people”, he tirelessly took photos of regular attendees, cosplayers of various ages and skill levels, guest & panel highlights…. If you weren’t lucky enough to be at the convention itself, seeing all his photos was the next best thing! In a few years we’d have con report galleries on Cosplay.com, Geocities and LinusLam …. but all these were _after the fact_, not during. Not quite the same, ya know?)

Even my mom knew his website, and during cons I’d call home during the weekend and she would excitedly tell me she was just on Kevin’s site and saw my photo!

Like, seriously…. we’d joke a con wasn’t a con until you either a) saw House of Anime truck in the parking lot, or b) ran into Mr Lillard.

Over the years there’s been all sorts of amazing run-ins with him. He would always make some jokes, and go above and beyond helping a fellow nerd – like the time my brand~new digital camera (in 2000! quite the expense!) suddenly died (6 AA batteries the monster ate) and he kindly tried to help me with both fresh batteries and advice, and when it looked like the camera wasn’t coming back he straight up took out his FILM CAMERA (again, this man was a pro! He always had a backup) and took photos of my cosplay and friends’, and handed me the finished roll

OR that other time my memory card was already full within literally first few hours of the convention (circa 2000, CompactFlash. Gigs? ha! Your PC might have 2 gigs hard drive and be a luxury. Memory cards ran in the Megabites) and this SAINT of a man helped by using HIS LAPTOP to let me clear out the card, email the zip file to myself then and there, and thus have memory space to take another 30~40 photos

or this Other OTHER time we were talking about shitty hotel hallway lights… And asked if he would mind popping with us outside real quick? He took the time to go! Outdoors into the sunshine! On the lawns by the hotel for a good 30 minutes! Thus giving us our first ‘proper’ cosplay photoshoot no less!! (freakin 2001, people!! pro~photoshoots or sheduling time-slots with an online-famous photog was not a thing. Not yet, not for another few years)

He made all us awkward weebs feel welcome from the get~go! Nobody had internet once left the house. No cellphones. Especially not a phone that could double as a hi-res camera. You came to the convention with a cheap disposable film camera, or none at all – hoping your friends brought one. Conventions didn’t have photo suites, no staff photogs… it was not a thing yet.

The other joke used to be “oh you’re at so-and-so con? Did you run into Kevin yet??” or “no no no, don’t change yet! We need to find Kevin!! You must be documented” (and if you had insane luck, you may even see that photo as convention cosplay coverage in an issue of Animerica months later!) For some of us, the only photos of those early costumes only exist because Kevin was there to take it.

#cosplayhistory

[butwhatifidothis]

Help me, i've been looking at bleach stuff again and suddenly feel that i was too harsh on the thousand year blood war when it first published, and now im desperately scrounging for good byakuya/hisana content.

so with that in mind, what do ya think about the sternritter in bleach? personally i've always felt that for all the cool aesthetics and powers at play, they're just a bit too unsympathetic/monsterous in terms of character writing that it hurts a lot of the drama of the tybw. But also recently I have considered how that was arguably the point in terms of ywach creating an army of metaphorical and literal monsters because the value of their lives mattered so little to him that all he looked for was strength. which... seems somewhat obvious in retrospect but still. idk, i guess all these years later bambiettas fate still unnerves me. and i wasn't even much of a fan of her until all that happened to her.

You asking this on the SAME DAY that I bought six zanpakuto at a con is HILARIOUS timing lmao

The Sternritter are in a sort of weird spot for me. There was always a hint of sympathy from me to them just on the basis of what had happened to so many Quincy by the hands of the Shinigami, and how on top of that many were under the culture Yhwach cultivated of pure-blooded Quincy needing to rule over everyone else as the strongest and if they can't live up to his exacting standards they will be considered just as worthless as impure-blooded Quincy/non-Quincy - for the majority of them it's kinda just a no-brainer that they would end up being as cruel as they are even to each other, after living in what is essentially a dog-eat-dog world filled with Uber Racism. And you can see how deeply some of the Sternritters buy into this, how even being sentenced to death or having their powers stolen from them does nothing to shake their belief in this man who stabbed them in the back. The dogmatism is engraved into some of these characters, to the point where literally nothing will make them ever see Yhwach as anything other than their leader.

Along with that, some of the Quincy, like Bazz-B and Liltotto and others, realize (at least somewhat) how shit their system was once they see how easily they are thrown away after doing everything right (or, if nothing else, never doing anything more wrong than the Quincy Yhwach chose as "the best"); they're willing to work with Shinigami to get justice against what was done to them by a leader they genuinely saw as god.

And in the middle of absolute dogmatism and rebellion, there are ones like BG9 and As Nodt, who seem to follow Yhwach not out of outright loyalty but out of a fear of death itself. Given who they're fighting (literal death gods) and who they both are as characters (As Nodt being someone who induces fear into others, BG9 being a robotic lifeform), it's definitely A Neat Choice to have these two specifically follow Yhwach not out of a sense of loyalty but out of an intense internal fear that they feel Yhwach both alleviates (by giving them the means to avoid death) and induces (by promising to kill them should they fail him).

They aren't all a monolith even with how deliberately isolated they were from pretty much all non-Quincy society, which honestly makes them pretty interesting as a total group.

But, yeah, on the other hand a lot of them don't really have much in terms of individual personality outside of cool one-liners or My Power Is My Personality. And some others have that issue and their power is just fuckin' annoying as shit and makes them inherently unlikeable GERARD. FUCK YOU GERARD HOLY GOD WERE YOU THE ACTUALLY THE WORST QUINCY EVER. There will be Bazz-B and Jugram's immensely interesting dynamic with each other, there will be Bambietta's genuinely tragic fate despite how deeply despicable she was as a character, there will be the Femritters' absolute determination to continue living and not letting anyone including Yhwach kill them... and then there's fuckin'. Pepe, the Bootleg Zommari that Kubo bought on the black market loose in an envelope. Or The Yapper who literally died in a montage and whose name no one gives a shit to remember. Some who really have nothing to them at all despite being elite enough Quincy to be given Schrift at all.

So, like. Overall I actually like them quite a bit? At least definitely as a generalized group. Individually there are some really really good stand-outs here and some really really wet farts there. And Gerard fucking sucks and I hate him

[mrzoetuxedo]

OPINION OF ELTINGVILLE CLUB: THE BEST THING I EVER SAW.

Lastly, a lot of people in Latin America is talking about a serie of comics called "Eltingville Club" created by Evan Dorkin.

All the idea was planned to be a critic of that nerds or geeks who has a very obssesive love for sci-fi things or pop culture BUT they think they know everything, make feel other people they are wrong or do literally anything to have something what they want.

In actual times, Eltingville Club is know for be a sort of prediction of the toxic fans you find on a fiction fandom. But what is about Eltingville?

The story is about four guys members of a club called Eltingville Club, each members is expert on one thing that a stereotype nerd likes: Comics, Sci-fi, Horror and Fantasy, but seeing them together is not a good signal because they give problems to anyone, but also they give problems each other and almost all the time have fights for a lot of things.

CHARACTERS (FROM THE MOST TOXIC TO THE LESS)

Bill: The MOTHERFUCKER of the club. He is the leader and the secretary of the comics, he is also more than a punchable nerd, he is manipulative, stubborn, egoist, cruel, unpleasant, delusional, a liar and acts like a man-child. Is the kind of toxic fan you don't want to be near. His obssesion for the geek culture is so big that he sees the reality in a twisted form.

Josh: He the most stereotyped of the group, is almost like Bill, who is the one who has more fights with, but surprisely he is a kind a afraid of him sometimes. He is the secretary of sci-fi (But only cares about the classic sci-fi) and is an obssesive fan of Star Wars.

Pete: Is the typical pervert edgy who you can find on internet, he is the secretary of horror, and the reason voice of the group, despite he doesn't make almost the same things than Bill and Josh do, he is close.

Jerry: Finally we have the secretary of fantasy games, he is most responsable of the group, the only one who can separate his obssesions with the reality and one who I think is THE REAL PROTAGONIST. He is clumsy and sometimes doesn't know what is doing, but as the story progresses, he starts to see that everything he did with the other guys is wrong. He use the catchphrase of BEEDEE BEEDEE BEEDEE from a character called Twinkie.

PILOT AND COMICS (SPOILERS)

On 2002, Adult Swim presented a pilot of a series based on the comics, specifically the first and second comic. Surprisely the pilot was loved by the critics and the public, however the serie never was made by different reasons like the animation budget or the fact the pilot was on air in high hours of the night.

And what I think about the pilot?

I think is the BEST pilot I ever saw, maybe it has a lot of differences and exclusive scenes that weren't in the comics but it told us everything great. It's really sad that the serie never comes out, but I hope that serie can become real in the future.

How about the comics? The story has an end?

YES! As I said before the series never came real BUT fortunaly, in the comics we have an end where all start in the lasts comics, there Jerry starts to see that all what Bill was doing wasn't fun and really make him get in trouble, but the real caos being when in the comic "THIS FAN... THIS MONSTER" Bill became mad and burns the comics store where the guys get they geek stuff, thanks to that action Eltingville Club get separate and don't see again after 10 years in a Comic-Con in the FINAL COMIC. In that place Jerry was having the hope to rebuilt their friendship with a new attitude and thinking that the others finally change their begin but... No. At the end Jerry finds out that they will never change and leave them finally, ending his "friendship" with the others.

And that's why I think Jerry is the real protagonist of "Eltingville Club" and the Comic-Con comic gives a perfect end for the story.

CONCLUSIONS

- Both the comics and the pilot are highly recommended

- Seeing the comics in Jerry's perspective really make you feel that he is the protagonist

- NEVER BE A BILL, A JOSH OR A PETE!

- Never burn a comic store

QUALIFICATION: 1000000/10

Thank you for reading :3

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Interested in your answers for 17 and 19 of the choose violence ask game, if you'd like to share them! Thank you :)

I was halfway through answering when I realized I totally misread the ask game. It is... not intended to be as dark as I made my answers, I think... oh well! I'm sticking to my guns. Anyone who's read my stuff knows this is a dead dove household lol

17. There should be more of this kind of fic/art

Oh man I'm about to Reveal Myself, but... I think KP as a whole could really use more noncon/dubcon, but KimChay especially (and Kim specifically). I read a fic a looong time ago when I first entered the fandom, it was like 400 words, and I'm not gonna name it in case the author doesn't want to be attached to it, but it was so good. Essentially Chay is very enthusiastic in the smut and Kin can't bring himself to say no, and I just!!! That is the good shit to me. I feel like especially post-reconciliation, Kim is exactly the kind of person that would overcompensate for breaking Chay's heart by giving him everything he wants. (i may be writing a fic about this already, called Stress Relief. That may or may not ever be posted. That may or may not be based on my own personal trauma. Anyway.) On a lighter note! I want to see more AUs! I'm a bit spoiled coming from the TW fandom, which is like. One of the most prolific fandoms on Ao3. But mannn, I want to see KimChay writers branch out and get absolutely unhinged with their AUs!

19. You're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

Lets be real. My first answer was non-con. There's really not a lot I'm ashamed about lol. I mean I've got like 3 different tentacle monster fics in the works, I've got a Wuju Bakery fic that's 90% slime and oviposition (technically still up for debate. Eggpreg?). I'm all in on the things I like, and don't care/think much about the things I don't. I think I've been in fandom long enough, and gotten old enough, that I just... don't have time to waste on being awkward anymore. Lose your shame! Cast off your shackles! That said I used to think rimming was really gross and I don't like it irl but there are some people who just write it like. unf. Hot damn. I'm a little mad at @ae-azile for that one chapter of Progression 👀

Also not mad/ashamed/horrified, but I was surprised at how much I love reading autistic Kim and writing trans!Kim. For the first one I think the writers in this fandom do an excellent and convincing job at characterizing him (esp @kimkhimhant my beloved <3) without infantilizing him, which... happens a lot with autistic characters. Like, the writing is so spot on that I didn't even question in, I pretty much immediately assimilated that into my mental rolodex of headcanons. 10/10 A+ effort for everyone around.

The trans!Kim aspect is also really fun. I'd never really written trans characters before, but this past year, and the past couple of months especially, I've been really struggling with my own gender and identity. So writing about that through Kim has been really therapeutic. (Adding to my first answer, we need more trans!Kim!) Although... I do hope that the particular way I've chosen to explore his gender in Dystocia is.. taken gracefully. Since it does revolve around Kim having a very traumatic pregnancy (and a lot of other trauma in general), which I know can be triggering for people. Whenever I eventually post that monster of a fic I'm just going to liberally tag it with all the things and hope for the best lol.

I think Dystocia and Stress Relief are two fics that I'm incredibly nervous to post, both because of how personally significant they are to me in a way most of my fics aren't, and because they're both very dark, which IDK if that's something people really want to see from KimChay (esp in Stress Relief).

Anyway! This is a lot wordier and darker than it probably needed to be, and IDK if it's what you were looking for dear anon, but thank you for the ask!

[rockyroadsmith]

What do you think are the monsters backstories? Besides Suezo Mocchi, since we already know theirs. Like, I always wondered what Hare was doing before he met Fairy Hare and Wild Hare. Or why Golem decided to stay at the fortress, etc. Monsters have to be unlocked, right, so did they have a partner before who unlocked them then left? Hmm...

Thank you for the very interesting ask! This is definitely a question I’ve thought about a lot over the years and I have a few theories for each! I always hated that they never really go into Tiger, Hare, and Golem’s pasts even though they give us little crumbs to eat. It’s definitely frustrating!

For Tiger, we know he was unlocked along with Gray Wolf, although he never says by who. The first real memory we see of these two is when they’re in a crate drifting down a river. If we look at lore and popular usage of this scenario, babies being sent down a river, like Moses, is usually a desperate last attempt to protect the baby from being killed. Even if Moo wasn’t around yet, there’s always evil in the world, so this makes me wonder if the Tiger brothers were unlocked by a human and with the threat of their village being under attack, the person who unlocked them put them in a crate and sent them down the river to save them. Tiger and Gray Wolf, being so young, most likely didn’t understand what was happening and took this as a sign of being abandoned by the human, which started their distrust for humans all together. I think from there, everything turned into survival and the two brothers had to learn quickly how to fend for themselves. I think at first they stuck to hunting and fishing, like we see in some of the flashbacks, but as they became more worldly, they found stealing supplies from humans was far more efficient. I think the Tiger brothers started frequently stealing from human travelers and the more infamous they became, the more rouge monsters also became interested in them. It’s interesting because we see Tiger only allowed other Tiger breeds to join his group of bandits, such as Daton and Datonare, so he must not have trusted other monsters. At this point, they would have their encounter with Moo, where Moo would ultimately abduct Gray Wolf and would give Tiger his trademark scar. After that, I think Tiger just continued his normal way of life since without Gray Wolf, he had lost his reason for existing. Running into the Searchers would change this, however, and would begin his journey to save his brother. :3

Hare must have been pretty poorly off at some point, which caused his obsession with money. I think Hare was unlocked by a human who wasn’t exactly an upstanding citizen, which is where he learned his con artist way of life. At some point, I can see a robbery going wrong and the human throwing Hare under the bus, which is what cemented his distrust and more negative views of humans. Something like this would have been very traumatic for Hare, too, which would make him less trusting of others. At some point he would have met Fairy Hare and Wild Hare, and in the flashbacks we see they all look the same as they did in the present, so I think this means Hare probably traveled alone for years until he met these two. The trio of Hares would go on to steal from anyone, and at some point of them being together, Moo was revived. Wild Hare began to feel jealous of how close Hare and Fairy Hare had become, and he ultimately sides with Moo and sells out his two friends. Unaware of the betrayal, Hare looks for his two friends, but after having no luck finding them, he goes back on the road alone. Over time, Hare becomes more obsessed with money, for it’s the only constant thing in his life and the only thing that hasn’t left him behind. Eventually he enters a tournament where he meets another notorious thief, Tiger of the Wind, and his life changes forever.

To me, Golem is one of the most interesting and mysterious characters in the entire show. His past is so shrouded in mystery and I have so many questions about him. In the Japanese version of episode 3, Golem tells the Searchers a little about the mass grave of Lost Discs he guards and that they were from ancient times. He states that his task is to soothe the souls of the dead and it’s one he’ll do for all of eternity. An interesting quote from him in the Japanese version is “My family will always guard this grave…”. Note the fact he mentions that his family also guarded the Lost Discs, meaning Golem actually had a family at one point, although we don’t know what happened to them and they’re never mentioned again. We also know the ancient people were highly advanced, so the more medieval style of the castle doesn’t really fit with the theme of the actual ancients we know about who created monsters. I think, perhaps, the people who built that castle and who’s Lost Discs Golem was guarding were from older times, but not quite from the same time as the ancients. This would also better align with the fact we know a king and his army went to kill Moo only a couple year prior to Genki being brought into the monster world as Suezo states this in episode 2, so this style of medieval culture is still practiced even to the current day while the ways of the ancients was destroyed during the original war with Moo and the Phoenix. I think that Golem’s family (or what he perceived as family, since even Tiger mentioned him and Gray Wolf are most likely not biologically related and were just unlocked at the same time) were guardians to whichever king the castle belonged to. The kingdom went through several different wars, each with terrible casualties, until a final war brought the castle down completely. I think throughout these wars, each time one of Golem’s ancestors was killed, the king would revive a new Golem breed in their place, much like Bossy with the Apes. One interesting trait of Golem that we see in episode 3 but is never used again, is his berserker state. We see him get so upset that he wipes out the entire troop of Jells, even the ones who tried to flee for their lives. I wonder if this was a trait his family had, as well, and that many of the Lost Discs found at the castle were casualties of them entering this berserker state. One thing we find out is every flower in the grave of Lost Discs grew from one of Golem’s tears and there’s tons of flowers in the area. I wonder if these were tears of guilt, perhaps from times in Golem’s past where he went into the berserker state and killed more monsters defending the ruined kingdom without meaning to kill them. I think Golem spent his entire life just guarding the ruined castle alone, just as he had been ordered to do so, until he meets the Searchers. It would explain a lot of his innocent and naive tendencies since he hadn’t seen the outside world for himself until he met Genki and the others.

These are just some theories, is all! There are definitely a lot of questions left unanswered in this series!

[workingforthewidow]

You spoke to me so sweetly

-

Sun to Me Masterlist!

Welcome to part 6 of Sun to Me! This is a short filler chapter wrapping up where left off on the boys birthday! But oh boy is part 7 gonna be fun, especially for our sweet baby Lester *wink wink nudge nudge*

This story is NSFW and not for minors- if you are under 18 go ask your legal guardian if you can watch the movie.

Warnings: kidnapping, forced marriage, dub-con, attempted non-con, abuse, Stockholm syndrome, age gap (15 years- K&C are 19 Sinclairs are freshly 34) Don’t like it don’t read it!

Tag list: message me if you wanna be tagged- @hollabackgrl

The truck stopped in front of the house. And the four got out.

“Let me go alone.” Caroline started towards the house.

Lester grabbed her hand and stopped her, “No sugarplum let me and Vinny go first. Make sure he’s calm.” Caroline gently pulled her hand away shaking her head.

“No. I need to do this. Stay here and if he’s still being an ass we can leave.”

“She’s going to do whatever she wants no matter what you say.” Katie comments from behind them. “Just let her go.” She looked to Caroline who mouthed ‘Thank you’.

Caroline walked up the stairs and slowly opened the door. The house was dark. Only the light from the tv glowed in the room and she could see Bo asleep on the couch.

She carefully tiptoed over and knelt by him putting her hand on his chest whispering, “Bo, love, I’m home.”

He stirred up didn’t fully wake up. He started muttering his sleep but that eventually became full sentences, “Mama… Mama I’m sorry. I didn’t want to make her leave. I didn’t want to mess up. You were right Mama. I ain’t lovable. I’m a monster that no one can love. Just take me now Mama. Take me away. I can’t hurt her if I’m dead.” Caroline could see tears on his face.

She kissed his cheeks the salty tears hitting her lips. Her own tears hitting her face.

“Bo, don’t say that. I can’t live without you. Wake up please love. I’m home. Let’s talk about this.” Bo’s eyes popped open at her voice.

“Baby, why, why did you come back?” His voice was shaking.

“Because I can’t stay away from you. Am I mad at you? 100%. You better have lots of plans to make this up to me. But I love you Bo. I may be an idiot for it but I do. I had to come back to you.” By this point Bo had sat up and took her hands.

“Come here Baby.” He pulled her into his lap and wrapped his arms around her waist burrowing his face in her chest. She could feel the hot tears starting up again. “I’m so sorry. I was angry. After I left for work it seemed like everything was shit and I took it out on you. I promise baby I will do better. I will be better for you. Please forgive me. I’ll do whatever it takes for you to bless me with your forgiveness. I love you Caroline.”

Caroline took his face in her hands and pressed her lips to his. “It’s gonna take more than words Bo. I have to see change. But I believe in you. I know you can be the best man for me and our babies someday.”

He looked to her when she said that, it was the first time she had brought up having kids with him. He nodded and kissed her again.

“I promise Baby. I will be better for you. For our family.”

—

The next two months seemed to fly by without notice. The only excitement was Bo earning the trust of his family back. It wasn’t easy but finally they got back to what was normal for them. The girls fell into the routine of being Sinclairs and keeping the boys happy. Wake up at 4:45, make the boys breakfast by 5:30, clean inside the house on Mondays and Thursdays, Laundry on Tuesdays, clean outside the house to get ready to garden in the spring on Wednesdays, Friday’s were spent with their respective husband at their work, lunch at 12:30, back to their daily activity until 4 then get ready for the twins to come home at 5, dinner ready by 6, one show at 7, then the girls in bed by 8 to start over the next day. Friday was also the day Bo took Caroline to see Mama. She mentioned it to Katie once who asked Vincent but he said he connected to their mama through his art. Saturdays were mostly spent in bed, cereal for breakfast, sandwiches for lunch, and something easy for dinner, sometimes Bo would grill for them. And Sundays it turns out the movie channel, that Bo with Vincent’s help, had gotten to stay in tune, played a different horror movie. So it became tradition to eat dinner early at 5 so they could get prepared for bed before the movie. Once it was over straight to bed.

Lester seemed to come around more and Caroline was 97.3% sure she had talked Bo into letting her getting a puppy the next time Lester saw one near the roadkill pit. Katie had convinced Vincent they needed a cat to get the mice in the museum. So Lester was on the lookout for a puppy and kitten for his new sisters. The girls fell in love with Lester and vice versa. It was like the brother they never had.

Everything seemed to be falling into place for the Sinclair family. But things are never as they seem in Ambrose.

They hadn’t seen a tourist since the girls showed up. The boys were both thankful and upset about that. It meant they could keep the girls in the dark about their activities but also slowed the process of the town. Caroline asked once at dinner why they hadn’t opened the town yet, at least reopen the museum to get some money to pay for the upkeep in the rest of town. Bo was able to smooth talk over it, something about taxes and the state permits.

It was getting colder, not yet freezing, but enough that the girls needed more clothes than the dresses and shorts they had brought when their original plan was sunny California. They tried to talk the boys into letting them go to town with Lester but the boys worried since they didn’t know the truth about the town they might let something slip on accident.

So one night while the girls slept the boys went into all the old houses and tried to find as many clothes as they could in the girls’ sizes or maybe a little bigger. They cleaned them all and Vincent mended any holes that were found. Under the guise that Lester was able to get them clothes at a second hand shop to save money the boys showed the girls the piles of clothes they had gathered.

Katie’s eyes lit up and she started pulling pieces and muttering things to herself.

“Uh Vinny I think we broke her.” Bo glanced over to Vincent as Katie continued her process.

Caroline laughed and shook her head, “Not broken! She was a seamstress remember. She’s pulling out things she can use to make new clothes. No offense to Les but these are kinda out of style right now. Katie can fix them up for us.”

Katie looked to Vincent, “We have needles and thread, yeah? I can work on these down in the studio with you?” Vincent hadn’t seen her smile like this. The way her eyes were sparkling, like they were made of emeralds.

He nodded making her smile even more, “Will you help me carry them down please?” It had taken the boys two trips to get all the clothes inside but with the girls it only took one trip down to the studio.

Caroline and Katie discussed what they wanted and needed before Bo was finally able to pull Caroline back up to the shop.

Katie spent all day working on sorting the clothes and designing patterns. She realized this was going to be a lot of work to do by hand and made the comment that she wished she had her sewing machine. Shortly after Vincent disappeared and returned taking her hand.

“Where are we going?” She asked him as they walked down the hall and up into the museum. They stopped at a door with a sign that read “Employees Only”. Vincent opened the door and Katie gasped.

It must have been his mothers office/studio when she ran the museum. A majority of the room was for wax sculpting but off in the corner was a sewing station, she assumed where Trudy had made the clothes for her figures.

Vincent handed her his notebook and she read what he wrote,

~You can make this space yours if you want. I can move all the wax works to my studio and move the paints and things we do together here.~

“I… I… this is too much. I can’t take over this. This was your mothers.” She shook her head but he took her hand making her look to him. He took his notepad back and quickly wrote,

~She would want it to be used. And once we open the museum again we will need to use the space anyway. Please angel, make it yours.~

“Okay, thank you. This means a lot to me.” She quickly wrapped her arms around him. “I can have Caroline help me move things in here. It’ll be fun, she can model for me again.” It felt right, getting back to sewing. Things really were falling into place for the Sinclairs.