#this was when i was. 8? so him 12? children man

[maxdibert]

okay, yes, snape suffered a lot but he also made his students suffer a lot. do you know what it must have been like for all those kids to be constantly humiliated??? if you like comparing with real life so much, what would you think of a real adult who abuses their power to feel better at the expense of children??? snape fans always come up with all kinds of excuses, but when it comes to the topic of his abuse towards his students, you always stay silent, and that's because it has no forgiveness.

Severus’s role as a dysfunctional adult is honestly pretty amusing to me, especially because while I never experienced bullying from peers or equals, I grew up in an environment full of wildly dysfunctional adults. On top of that, I now work on legal cases involving even more dysfunctional adults. And, to make it even better, while my classmates never gave me grief, attending a private Catholic school in the 2000s meant teacher-on-student violence was pretty much a daily occurrence. Not just at school—I've also had some truly awful professors at university. So, I get firsthand what it’s like to have authority figures who are supposed to guide and protect you but act like an absolute pack of jerks.

Here’s an unpopular opinion: if I compare my personal experiences with dysfunctional adults and terrible teachers, Severus is practically a lamb. I’ve witnessed some insane things. There was a case at my school where a teacher bullied three siblings (in different grades) so badly that their dad came to the school and physically beat the teacher up. And honestly? The guy deserved it. I’ve seen old-school priests handing out slaps. I’ve had a teacher in his late 30s openly flirting with 17-year-old students. I’ve had teachers who didn’t just throw out a sarcastic remark—they flat-out called us “idiots,” “morons,” "dickheads", "assholes", “worthless,” or said things like, “You’re all going to end up mopping floors because you’re useless pieces of crap.” Fun times with Mr. Antonio.

There was one teacher who made students stand up one by one so he could critique their outfits in front of the entire class, piece by piece, like he thought he was Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada. Another handed out nicknames that were humiliating and outright cruel. Or that elementary teacher who also taught catechism and would call up children who were not going to take their First Communion (this happens at 8 or 9 years old) to the front of the class and publicly ask them why they didn’t want to embrace Jesus Christ. She would even ask if they thought their parents didn’t love them because they weren’t letting them do the same as their friends. Or the second-grade teacher who called a boy up to the board because he didn’t know a multiplication table very well and started singing a mocking song in Spanish that goes, “Fulanito tururú, que no sabe ni la u” (basically calling someone slow-witted).

Then there was the fourth-grade teacher (9-10yo) who had a particular grudge against one of my classmates and kept threatening to lock him in places or scaring him by saying he was going to throw him out the window. The English teacher, who, when we were 14 years old, locked us in a classroom, made us skip lunch, and kept us there without eating until 5 PM. The technology teacher, a 50-year-old man with a very hands-on approach towards the girls in first and second year of secondary school (12-13 yo). And I could go on and on.

So yeah, I’ve seen some wild stuff in classrooms, and trust me, you don’t need to explain the trauma bad teachers can cause—I’ve had my share of them. And none of it is going to make me like Severus any less. If anything, the stuff he does in the books feels like 1% of the madness I’ve seen play out in real life.

[mistress-of-nightmares]

"jiang cheng used wei wuxian's crippling phobia to confirm his identity!!" yeah and my older brother would stand at the edge of our balcony unseriously to make me cry when i was younger what's your point

[robertreich]

10 Worst Things About The Trump Presidency

Donald Trump left office with the lowest approval rating of any president ever. But some people now seem to be suffering from amnesia.

Let me jog your memory. Here are 10 Worst Things About the Trump Presidency — in no particular order.

#1. Trump fueled division and sparked a record uptick in hate crimes.

#2. Murder went way up under Trump. He presided over the largest ever single-year increase in homicides in 2020. A number of factors might have contributed to that, but a big one is…

#3. Gun sales broke records under Trump, who has bragged about how he “did nothing” to restrict guns as president in spite of…

#4. Under Trump, America suffered more than 1,700 mass shootings.

#5. Trump said there were "very fine people" among the neo-Nazis in Charlottesville.

I’m halfway to ten. If you think I’m missing something big, leave it in the comments.

#6. Trump allied himself with the Proud Boys, a violent hate group who helped orchestrate the Jan 6 Capitol attack.

#7. Trump’s not wrong when he says…

TRUMP: I got rid of Roe v. Wade.

It is entirely because of Trump’s judicial appointments that 1 in 3 American women of childbearing age now lives in states with abortion bans.

#8. One of Trump’s Supreme Court justices was Brett Kavanaugh, a man accused of sexual assault by multiple women.

#9. Trump’s White House interfered in the FBI’s investigation of Brett Kavanaugh’s alleged sexual assaults.

And now: #10. Trump has been convicted of committing 34 felonies while in office. The criminally false business filings he got convicted for in New York? All of them were committed while he was president.

I’m sorry, did I say the 10 Worst Things About the Trump Presidency? I meant 15.

#11. Trump’s failed pandemic response is estimated to have led to hundreds of thousands of needless deaths. By the time Trump left office, roughly 3,000 Americans were dying of covid every day. That’s a 9/11-scale mass casualty event every single day. How did Trump screw up so badly?

#12. Trump’s White House discarded the pandemic response playbook that had been assembled by the Obama administration.

#13. Trump disbanded the National Security Council’s pandemic response team.

#14. Trump repeatedly lied about the danger of covid, saying it was no worse than the flu or that it would go away on its own.

But behind closed doors, Trump admitted he knew covid was deadly.

#15. Trump promoted fake covid cures like hydroxychloroquine and even injecting people with disinfectants.

After Trump’s “disinfectant” remarks, poison control centers received a spike in emergency calls.

That’s fifteen things. Should I keep going? Ok, I’ll keep going. The 20 Worst Things About the Trump Presidency.

#16. Trump presided over a net loss of 2.9 million American jobs — the worst recorded jobs numbers of any U.S. president in history.

#17. Trump profited off the presidency, making an estimated $160 million from foreign countries while he was president.

#18. Trump also billed the Secret Service over $1 million for the privilege of staying at his golf clubs and other properties while they protected him. That’s your money!

#19. Trump caused the longest government shutdown in U.S. history when he didn’t get funding for his border wall, which he said Mexico was going to pay for.  

#20. Under Trump, the national debt increased by about 40% — more than in any other four-year presidential term — largely because of his tax cuts for the rich and big corporations.

You didn’t really think I was stopping at 20, did you? We’re going to 25 —

#21. Trump separated more than 5,000 children from their parents at the border, with no plan to ever reunite them, putting babies in cages.

#22. The Muslim Ban. Yes, Trump really did try to ban Muslims from entering the country.

#23. Trump sparked international outrage by moving the American Embassy in Israel to Jerusalem while closing the U.S. mission to Palestine.

#24. Trump tasked his son-in-law Jared Kushner with drafting a potential Middle East “peace plan” with zero Palestinian input.

#25. And finally, Trump recognized Israel’s occupation of the Goh-lahn Heights, which is considered illegal under international law.

So there you have it, folks: The 25 Worst — Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Did I mention the impeachments? We’ve got to do the impeachments. Let’s go to 30.

#26. Trump broke the law by trying to withhold nearly $400 million of U.S. aid for Ukraine in an effort to extort a personal political favor from Ukraine’s Pres. Zelensky. Trump wanted Zelensky to interfere in the 2020 election by announcing an investigation into the Bidens. Delaying this aid to Ukraine weakened Ukraine and strengthened Russia.

#27. Trump personally attacked and ruined the careers of everyone who stood in the way of his illegal Ukraine scheme, including Ambassador Marie Yovanovitch and Lt. Colonel Alexander Vindman.

#28. To cover up the scheme, Trump ordered the White House and State Department to defy congressional subpoenas.

#29. For these reasons, on December 18, 2019, Trump became the third U.S. president to be impeached. He was charged with Abuse of Power and Obstruction of Congress.

#30. Even while he was being investigated for trying to get Ukraine to interfere in the U.S. election, Trump publicly called for China to interfere in the election.

So those are the 30 Worst Things —

I’ll go to 35.

#31. Long before Election Day, Trump started making false claims that the election would be rigged.

#32. After losing, Trump falsely claimed the election was stolen, even though his own inner circle, including his campaign manager, White House lawyers, and his own Justice Department and attorney general told him it was not.

#33. Trump kept telling his Big Lie even after more than 60 legal challenges to the election were struck down in court, many by Trump-appointed judges.

#34. Trump ordered the Department of Justice to falsely claim that the election “was corrupt.”

#35. Trump and his allies used threats to pressure state leaders in Arizona and Georgia to falsify the election results.

We may go to 40.

#36. When none of the previous schemes worked, Trump and his allies produced fake electoral votes cast by fake electors in multiple swing states. His former White House chief of staff and Rudy Giuliani are among the many members of his inner circle who have been criminally indicted for this scheme.

#37. Trump tried to bully Vice President Pence into obstructing the certification of the election.

#38. Trump invited a mob to the Capitol on Jan 6 with his “be there, will be wild” tweet.

#39. Sworn testimony alleges that when Trump was warned that members of the crowd were carrying deadly weapons, he ordered security metal detectors to be taken down.

#40. Knowing the crowd had deadly weapons, he ordered them to go to the Capitol and…

TRUMP: …fight like hell.

#41 — Yes, yes, I know, bear with me.

Trump betrayed his oath to defend the nation by doing nothing to stop the Jan 6 violence. Instead, according to witness testimony, he sat and watched TV for hours.

#42. On January 13, 2021, Trump became the only president ever to be impeached twice. This time he was charged with incitement of insurrection. It was a bipartisan vote.

#43. The majority of senators — 57 out of 100 — voted to convict Trump, including 7 Republican senators.

So that’s the two impeachments and the Big Lie, but wait, we haven’t dealt with Russia, right? So we’re going to 50.

#44. In a likely obstruction of justice, Trump pressured then FBI Director James Comey to stop the FBI’s investigation into Trump’s National Security Adviser, Michael Flynn. This was documented in the Mueller report.

#45. When Comey didn’t bend to Trump’s will, Trump fired him.

#46. Trump tried to shut down the Mueller investigation by ordering White House Counsel Don McGann to fire Mueller. McGann refused because that would be criminal obstruction of justice.

#47. When news got out that Trump tried to fire Mueller, Trump repeatedly told McGann to lie — to Mueller, to press, to public — and even create a false document to conceal Trump’s attempt to fire Mueller.

#48. Trump ordered his staff not to turn over emails showing Don Jr. had set up a meeting at Trump Tower before the 2016 election with representatives of the Russian government.

#49. Trump convinced Michael Cohen to lie to Congress about Trump’s plans to build a Trump Tower in Moscow, and Cohen served prison time for lying to Congress.

#50. Trump was not charged for criminal obstruction of justice because it’s the Justice Department’s policy not to indict a sitting president, but more than a thousand former federal prosecutors who served under both Republicans and Democrats, signed a letter declaring there was more than enough evidence to prosecute Trump.

So those are the 50 Worst Things About the Trump Presidency. Now I could go on…

And I will! The 75 Worst Things About the Trump Presidency.

#51. Trump said he’d hire only the best people, but…

His campaign chair was convicted of multiple crimes.

So was one of his closest associates.

His deputy campaign chair pleaded guilty to crimes.

So did his personal lawyer

His National Security Adviser

The Chief Financial Officer of his business

A campaign foreign policy adviser

And one of his campaign fundraisers.

They all committed crimes, and Trump pardoned most of them.

#52. Trump said he’d drain the Washington swamp. But he appointed more billionaires, CEOs, and Wall Street moguls to his administration than any administration in history

#53. Trump intervened to get his son-in-law, Jared Kushner top-secret clearance after he was denied over concerns about foreign influence.

#54. Trump hosted a Russian Foreign Minister to the Oval Office, where Trump revealed top-secret intelligence.

Oh, and Trump’s economic policies!

#55 Trump promised that the average American family would see a $4,000 pay raise because of his tax cuts for the wealthy and big corporations. How’d that work out? Did you get a $4,000 raise? Of course not! Nobody did!

#56. Trump vowed to protect American jobs, but offshoring increased and manufacturing fell.

#57. Trump said he would fix America’s infrastructure, but it never happened. He announced so many failed “infrastructure weeks” they became a running joke.

#58. Trump said he would be “the voice” of American workers, but he filled the National Labor Relations Board with anti-union flacks who made it harder for workers to unionize.

#59. Trump’s Labor Department made it easier for bosses to get out of paying workers overtime, which cheated 8 million workers of extra pay.

#60. Trump repeatedly suggested he might serve more than two terms in violation of the Constitution — and continues to do so.

#61. Trump called Haiti and African nations “shithole” countries.

#62. Trump tried to terminate DACA, which protects immigrants brought to the U.S. as children. Luckily this was struck down by the courts.

#63. Trump called climate change a “hoax.”

#64. Trump pulled out of the Paris Climate Agreement.

#65. Trump rolled back more than 100 environmental protections.

#66. Every budget Trump proposed included cuts to Social Security and Medicare.

#67. Trump tried (and failed) to repeal the Affordable Care Act, which would have resulted in 20 million Americans losing insurance. And striking down the ACA’s protections for the roughly 130 million people with pre-existing conditions could have driven up their insurance premiums or led to a loss of coverage.

#68. Trump made it easier for employers to remove birth control coverage from insurance plans.

#69. By the end of Trump’s term, the number of people lacking health insurance had risen by 3 million.

#70. Trump lied. Constantly. He made 30,573 false or misleading claims while president — an average of 21 a day, according to Washington Post fact-checkers.

#71. Trump allegedly took hundreds of classified documents on his way out of the White House, reportedly including nuclear secrets, which he then left unsecured in various parts of Mar-a-Lago, including a bathroom. He was even caught on tape showing them off to people.

#72. Trump seriously discussed the idea of nuking a hurricane.

#73. When Hurricane Maria hit Puerto Rico, Trump delayed $20 billion of aid and allowed Puerto Rico to be without power for 181 days.

#74. Trump suggested withholding federal aid for California wildfire recovery and said the solution was to “clean” the “floors” of the forest.

#75. Trump pulled out of the Iran deal, placing Iran on a path to developing nuclear weapons.

Honestly, there’s so much more, from exchanging “love letters” with North Korea’s brutal dictator to publicly denigrating a Gold Star military widow and making her cry, to the way he attacked journalists, to late night tweet binges.

Look, I can understand why a lot of people want to block all of this out of their memories. But we cannot afford to forget just how terrible Trump’s time in the White House was for this nation.

And we sure as hell can’t afford to put him back there.

[5sospenguinqueen]

Bedtime Stories | Daniel Ricciardo x Author! Reader

Summary: For the past six years, you've been dreaming of a future with Daniel. Until one silly little interview shatters every illusion.

Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Baby fever. End of a relationship. Daniel bashing.

Female reader with various faceclaims. Takes place in the 2022 season.

Main Masterlist

next.

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User 2 no, it's not an announcement. her best friend is currently pregnant and she was gushing about looking forward to aunty duties

User 3 omg her and daniel would make the cutest babies though

→ User 4 i bet she can't wait until they have their own mini-me

User 5 imagine our rom-com queen going from writing the cutest but filthiest fiction imaginable to writing about why you should eat your carrots

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22•05•22

User 6 i can't believe this man was talking about being in the height of his career when he's been nothing but a flop since leaving red bull

User 7 the way he's been stringing this poor woman along for 6 years, knowing how badly she wants children, to then decide in a random interview that he's never going to have kids because they would be a 'distraction'

User 8 fans spotted y/n running from the pits once she saw that daniel was safely done with racing

User 9 i fear we may be witnessing the downfall of something we once held sacred

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16•06•22

fallontonight just posted

liked by YourUserName, kellypiquet and others

fallontonight did you know @ YourUser Name was once chased by a kangaroo? find out how in tonight's episode of The Tonight Show 📚🦘

4,477 comments

YourUserName thanks for having me! ✨

User 11 excuse me, ma’am, reassess what

User 12 daniel has been absent from her last 3 posts

→ User 1 not even in the likes or comments

→ User 2 and he didn't even congratulate her on the recent book launch

→ User 3 ya’ll are reaching. he's busy racing. she's busy doing book promo. they still follow each other

User 4 anyone notice she didn't look as happy as she usually does

→ User 5 yes! and i swear she got teary when talking about her life plans 🥺

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YourUserName just posted

liked by maxverstappen1, mclaren and others

YourUserName my happy place 🌊🐚🦀 Aug '22

4,990 comments

User 6 does this mean a new book is coming soon

→ User 7 girl, we’ve just had one. let the woman rest

→ YourUserName sorry, my lovelies but i don’t think i'm in the right headspace to being right a romance novel at this time

→ User 6 confirmation??!?!

→ User 7 we’re children of divorce

→ User 8 honestly fuck those two because i couldn’t have cared less about vroom vroom boys until mother started dating one and now i'm crying in class ‘cause they’re over

landonorris get that bread, queen 🍞

→ YourUserName who let you out of daycare

→ User 9 not y/n and lando interacting like she didn’t break his teammates heart

→ User 10 more like his teammate broke y/n’s heart. let's not make daniel out to be the victim here

kellypiquet p said get writing those children’s books so she can brag about aunty y/n to her friends

→ YourUserName my sweet girl. i saw the cutest dress the other day for her so I’ll pop round soon x

→ User 11 i love their friendship

→ User 12 get this woman a child. She’s too sweet to be stuck in cool aunt mode forever

User 13 anyone notice she didn't do her annual birthday post for daniel?

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04•09•22

User 14 no because the interviewer was so real for that. checo has a few children and he’s currently 2nd best. max is nowhere to be seen on the grid he's that far ahead and he makes sure p is his priority when she’s there so???

→ User 15 and the way he stormed out. i bet PR are sooo happy with him

User 16 nah because mclaren recently announced that they’re not extending his contract so he currently doesn't have his seat and doesn't have his y/n, all because he thought he was better than that

YourUserName posted a new story

danielricciardo posted a new story

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danielricciardo just posted

liked by landonorris, estebanocon and others

danielricciardo yesterday was something. p17 wasn't the result we were expecting, and the media were a challenge but it's always a delight to be in Suzuka. Moving on to the Americas

5,509 comments

User 1 maybe if y/n was there, you wouldn't have done so badly

User 2 maybe if he had a baby waiting in the paddock he would’ve had more incentive to do better

mclaren we’ll get them next time 💪

User 3 letting mclaren and lando down

→ User 4 the real reason he and y/n broke up is because he has no wins. she should move onto lando or something

→ User 5 he’s way too young for her

→ User 4 they'd make a good looking couple tho

(comments have been disabled for this post)

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19•10•22

YourUserName just posted

liked by charles_leclerc, bloomsburypublishing and others

YourUserName thirty, flirty and thriving. please enjoy a small snippet of my 30th birthday, organised by my favourite girl. these are the nice moments before she plies me full of cocktails and i become the sloppiest person in monaco tagged: kellypiquet

kellypiquet any chance to celebrate you 🤍🤍

→ kellypiquet and an even better chance to drink the entire bar and force max to carry us home

→ maxverstappen1 i'm just glad i was able to pull you both out of the sea before you drowned

landonorris can't believe you tried (and failed) to stop us from gatecrashing

→ YourUserName it was an exclusive event, we don't let randos in

→ landonorris i know you're joking but it still hurts my feelings

maxverstappen1 happy birthday, sloppy. you don't look a day over 40

→ YourUserName i'm gonna let that slide but only because i love the bag that kelly told you to buy

User 7 happy birthday to the best author

User 8 happy birthday queen

carlossainz55 happy birthday, y/n 💐

liked by YourUserName

danielricciardo happy birthday x

User 5 kelly and y/n look like the funnest people to hang out with

→ User 6 literally need to know how to become part of their duo

lewishamilton happy birthday, y/n. have a lovely night 💕

liked by YourUserName

mclaren happy birthday to papaya's favourite author (we're still waiting for a racing rom-com that is quite clearly about your favourite f1 team and their super sexy admin) 🥳🥳

liked by YourUserName

Request are open!

Baby Fever Angst Series

[aloesarchives]

Domestic Headcanons w/ Mama!Reader and the Fushiguros #2: New Addition to the Family!

TW/Warnings: Domesticity, AFAB/Female Reader, Family life, Pregnancy, Mention of Creampies but not sexual, unhinged crack, JJK OC(but not main x Reader)

Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x Fem!Reader

Pronouns/Usage: She/Her, Mama/Mom

It was about time I finished this, been sitting in my drive for a few months. Anyway, this is a general headcanon that takes place mostly in my Modern Au as Mayumi will appear in future along with her bio. But she may appear in my "Toji Lives" au depending how I'm really feeling, I will probably age her up if I do.

If you has questions or wanna ask more about her, feel free to drop an ask in my inbox!

Introducing:

Name: Mayumi (L/N) Fushiguro

Kanji Name: 万優三

Age: 2-3(Modern Au)

Given how Toji is a dog 25/8 whenever he’s given any alone time with you, Megumi is genuinely surprised he and Tsumiki don’t have at least two or more younger siblings.

It mostly comes down to you and Toji’s schedules and how having another child or having more children wouldn’t be the best choice for you two and the kids themself.

It was decided by you AND Toji that Megumi would be your last child since baby Megumi was a hassle and you two were dealing with two kids under the age of three. As time went on, raising the two was hard work but both of you two managed. Now Tsumiki and Megumi are in high school and can function, there’s no need for you and Toji to treat them like children even though they will always be your babies.

But with Tsumiki and Megumi always away at school, it’s mostly you and Toji at home. Yes, it was nice and peaceful to have your house with you and your hubby. But you start longing for the days your children were younger and small. Missing when Megumi would call you Mama and Tsumiki with Mommy. You become all sentimental especially looking through family pictures throughout the house and the family albums. You started to miss having to take care of a little one in the house.

Toji notices this change in your behavior so he asks what's on your mind. When you tell him you missed your children being children, he suggested having one more child. This shocked you considering that Toji told you himself that Megumi was your two’s last child. He didn’t want to have any more after that because Megumi was a handful. You told him if he’s not comfortable and isn’t ready for another one that he shouldn’t force himself just to make you happy. You’ll just satisfy it with old baby pictures from the past.

You didn’t want to have a child just because you wanted a baby to coddle and that’s it. All children deserve to have a parent but not every parent deserves a child. But Toji brings up the point that both you and him are more stable, both financially and mentally, and have more time to be at home. Since your two other children are teenagers who can do basic functions, you can focus on taking care of a child while taking care of teenagers.

After some time and Toji being the little devil on your shoulder, you gave the green light to have another child. Albeit being the last child you and Toji will ever have.

Toji is excited to have another kid with you and to give Tsumiki and Megumi a younger sibling. But we all know why Toji is REALLY happy to give you another child. As the man got to stepping in making you pregnant and having another kid. This man put so many creampies in you it’s insane.

But you guessed the universe wanted to make it easier the third time because, like all of your pregnancies which is only two, you got pregnant fast. It only took a month of trying to get pregnant. Just like any pregnancy, it was rough. It was your third time so you expected what’s to come, though it had been 12 years since you were last pregnant. But Toji, being your ever loving husband, took care of you and was at your beck and call(Explain in detail here). Your scary, intimidating, and grumpy dog of a husband becomes your sweet and protective puppy all over again(if Toji wasn’t fucking already lol).

You wanted to wait until a visible ultrasound was possible to tell your two children. Luckily, Megumi and Tsumiki would be home right after school ends and you would tell them the news. After dinner, you told your two children to wait a bit at the table as you got the ultrasound that’s sealed in an envelope. As you just place the envelope in front of your kids, they look at it curiously. Toji chuckles as Megumi flips the envelope on both sides before Tsumiki grabs it from her brother.

“So we opened it, Mom? What’s inside?”

“You’ll find out once you open it, my dear.”

Then Tsumiki opens the envelope and finds the picture. She takes it out and holds it so she and Megumi can look at it. It took Tsumiki a few seconds to figure out as her smile extended. Megumi is still confused when his sister says, “Are you really, mom?!”

You nodded your head as Tsumiki stood up from her chair and gave you a hug. Megumi was still trying to wrap his head around the picture. Toji chuckles at his son as he walks over to him. “Are you okay, Megumi? You’ve been staring at that picture like it was a puzzle.” “I don’t know what I’m supposed to be looking at. How come Tsumiki got it before I did?” Tsumiki goes to Megumi as she starts explaining the picture. Before she even finishes, your son looks at you with wide eyes as he blurts out, “You’re pregnant, Mom?!”

Toji bursts out in laughter at Megumi while you smile at your son. You were happy that your children felt the same way you did, especially seeing Megumi smile. You were worried about the age gap between your children and their youngest sibling but it seems to not be a problem to your kids. 

You loved the fact your children were happy about having another sibling.

Ever since the announcement, Megumi has been home more often. While your children have been more considerate(if they weren’t already), Megumi had this shift in behavior that made you a little worried. Once you were in your 2nd trimester, Megumi always tried to be home before sundown. He always called you after school if you needed anything from the grocery or convenience store. He was very reluctant to leave you alone. At home, he always checks up on you whether you’re in the bedroom, sitting on the couch, in your home office/personal rooms. 

As much as Megumi says he doesn’t take after his dad, you thought it was adorable and endearing how Megumi looked after you like Toji did. Because of your already fluctuating hormones, you dote and gush over Megumi way more than usual. You didn’t before because you wanted to respect Megumi’s space and independence. Always playfully pinching his cheeks, giving your mama kisses, petting and ruffling his hair, the list goes on. Megumi never pushes you away or rejects your affection because you are his mama and it makes you happy. It’s also because Megumi loves your affection as it reminds him of when he was a little boy, but since he’s older he wants to be taken more seriously and wants you and Toji to treat him as such. Yet it bit him in the ass because you respected his wishes and only gave him physical affection when he gave the green light.

Megumi, every time he’s home, is stuck at your side. You’re in the kitchen making yourself a drink, Megumi is sitting at the table already. On the couch folding a small laundry batch, Megumi’s helping you with it. Sitting in the garden underneath the tree, Megumi makes you sit on the blanket as sits beside you with his dogs laid out in the shade. The only time he isn’t is when you’re in the bathroom or sleeping in your bedroom. But Megumi sends his dogs to watch over you during your naps. Bro, Toji told Megumi to make room for him on the couch just for him to side-eyes his dad and say “no”. Then Megumi’s dogs appear next to you and lay their heads on your lap. Toji was so annoyed.

But you didn’t know how concerned Megumi was for you until you Gojo called you and said Megumi wanted to opt out of dorming his first year at Jujutsu Tech. You asked Gojo if Megumi said why and Gojo only said, “Megumi-kun only told me he just can’t, (Y/N)-sama.” By the time the call happened you were in your third trimester, meaning you were nearing your due date. You asked Toji if he knew but he had no clue either. You and your husband had a talk with Megumi about it. Megumi said he didn’t need to dorm when he’s in high school because he could just walk to school from the house. But Toji being the better interrogator, he got Megumi to spill the real reason. And so Megumi reveals he doesn't want to dorm once he goes to Jujutsu Tech because he wants to help out around the house and watch his little sibling grow up. 

“Megs, you know I’m home, right?”

Megumi looks at his father before continuing.

“As I was saying, I need to be here in my little sister’s life. I don’t want to be a stranger because she can’t remember me, Mom.”

You gave a reassuring smile to your son, placing a hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

“I get it, Megumi. I completely understand where you’re coming from. But I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me. I have your sister and papa after all to help me, especially your papa since he can cook anything we ask for. And know the school requires their first years to live on campus, so you do have to live on school grounds. You can always come back whenever you need to, this will always be your home, My Dear Megumi–Wait, little sister? You think it’ll be a girl, Megumi?”

He shrugs, causing Toji to raise his brow at him.

“Ya sure, Megs? You don’t think it’ll be a boy? Don’t you want another boy in the family?”

Megumi squints at his dad as he frowns.

“If I know this family, your genes are too strong, Dad. I’m a complete copy of you and Tsumiki only got Mom’s personality and smile. If it’s a boy, it will be another version of you and I don’t even wanna think about that. Plus, I wouldn’t mind having a baby sister around, especially if she takes after Mom.”

You were flattered and honored that Megumi felt this way while Toji was utterly offended at his own son.

Megumi is a good brother and son all over. He looks after you, he looks out for Tsumiki when he can, and has a good relationship with Toji. You’d think he’ll be an amazing older brother considering how caring and gentle he can be. He may be a little clumsy but he tries and that is what matters. 

You decided to bring Megumi and Tsumiki with you and Toji to your next ultrasound appointment. Luckily, no problems were detected for the precious Fushiguro baby. The doctor and technician also revealed that you were having a baby girl! Tsumiki is visibly happy, slightly shaking Megumi's shoulders while he had a soft smile of his own. Then you looked over at your husband to see him with a wide but genuine grin.

“What’s with the grin, Toji?”

“Nothing, Hon. Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Having another girl to spoil~.”

Your pregnancy goes as planned. Much to the dismay of Megumi, you gave birth while they were in school. As soon as Megumi and Tsumiki walk out of the school doors, they see Toji with the car waiting for them. “C’mon you two, don’t ‘cha want to meet your baby sister?” Tsumiki never saw Megumi sprinted towards the car so fast, whipping past her. Toji just laughs at Megumi’s eagerness to go see you and the baby.

Megumi is bouncing his leg in the car as they go to drive to the hospital. Once checking in, Megumi leaves his dad and sister in the dust to go find your room. Once he did, Megumi knocked gently before going inside with Toji and Tsumiki not far behind. Then the kids see the little baby bundled in your arms, sleeping away as you greet your older children. 

Megumi was right because Mayumi took after you except her eye color, which was like Megumi and Toji. But everything else, she was a carbon copy of you. You joked to Toji about being even since your third child looks like you. Toji goes along with it but he can’t help but feel warm inside knowing he has a daily reminder of his beautiful wife.

Megumi and Tsumiki get to hold their little sister. It was game over for Megumi because as soon as she was in his arms, he’d do anything for her. He was melting for his little sister and she didn’t even know it yet.

Megumi tries to spend a lot of time with her until he has to dorm at Jujutsu Tech. Megumi gets sentimental when he sees her baby pictures then and now she’s a toddler speaking full sentences. 

She loves to be held or sitting in someone’s lap. You, Toji, Tsumiki and Megumi, it doesn’t matter. She just likes to be close. It took her a long time to understand personal space but she tries her best. But she mostly likes being held by Toji since he’s tall. Plus she says Toji gives nice hugs. 

But Mayumi is picky when it comes to other people. She gets comfortable through exposure but she doesn’t like other people that much. She knows the others and is fine with them, but she’s not so much a people person. Not shy, just like a small circle.

Mayumi calls Tsumiki Miki-Nee or Tsumi Nee-san, then Mayumi calls Megumi Gumi-Nii and/or Mimi Nii-san.

Toji’s nicknames for Mayumi are Princess, Little Lady, Sweet Pea, and Snapdragon. Sometimes he does a variation of her name like Yumi or Mayu. But those don’t start coming until she’s much older.

Toji gets bummed out that Mayumi hangs out with Megumi and is her self-proclaimed favorite person. But you always remind him that she loves all of you, including him. This is true when she gets picked up by Toji at daycare or Toji comes home and she greets him. Always a smile on her face, arms out-stretched, while saying “Papa!”

Every time Toji is doing something outside, she’s either playing on the engawa, underneath the tree for shade, or running around and playing in the garden and the Koi pond nearby. She mostly likes watching the koi fishes swim around. She even deeps her feet into the crystal blue water as the fish gently nibble on her feet.

She’s also not a picky eater. Will eat anything and everything put in front of her that is seen as food. Her favorites are berries.

Mayumi’s favorite person is definitely Megumi. Toji thought it was him but he soon found out that was not the case. All because her first words weren’t Mama or Papa, her first words were Gumi. Then she started walking because she saw Megumi sitting on the couch while you were making lunch with Toji and took her first steps because she wanted to be near him. Sometimes when she can’t sleep, has a nightmare, or wants someone to take her to the bathroom, she usually goes to Megumi because his room is the closet. Some mornings, you would find Mayumi sleeping alongside Megumi. She usually hangs out in Megumi’s room doing her own thing or playing with his dogs. Megumi doesn’t mind but only gets annoyed when he’s napping or sleeping and she wakes him up. 

But she also hangs out in Tsumiki’s room too. Trying a new hairstyle, clothes, or playing with her stuffed animals. Tsumiki makes Mayumi into a Sanrio fan and even gives some of her plushies to Mayumi because she doesn’t play with them anymore. Every morning, Mayumi goes to Tsumiki to do her hair for the day. Sometimes asking Tsumiki to put a nice hair clip or bow for her. Mayumi’s so happy once she’s done that she shows you and Toji and it’s just so sweet oml.

She loves Megumi’s dogs and shikigamis. But her favorites are his white and black doggos. She loves playing and hugging them, always so gently with them. She likes to put ribbons on them like a collar and read to them. She would nap while laying on top of the white dog’s side and the black one is guarding her feet, making a protective circle around her. Then they allow her to grab onto them to help her practice walking. It’s so cute.

Mayumi knocks on doors before she enters. You don’t know where she picked it up from until you remember knocking on the doors yourself as you hold her. You assume she picked your habit, which turns out to be useful and courteous. It’s always three short knocks, keeping this habit even as a teenanger. 

Mayumi is the apple of the family’s eye and almost everyone, even for Yuuji, Nobara, Maki, Yuuta, Toge, Panda, and fucking Hakari and Kiara. They all have a soft spot for her. The worst of them all is Satoru, proclaiming he’s her big brother to which Suguru smacks him on the hand for it. He tries to win her over but his grand gift-giving actually scares her and makes her wary of him, much to Satoru’s dismay. To which goes to my next point:

Bro, your daughter doesn’t like Satoru. It’s high-key funny. She doesn’t hate him per say. She’s more scared and unsettled by him. One time, she started crying late at night because she had a nightmare. Megumi, with Mayumi in his arms, had to knock on your bedroom door because she was inconsolable and wouldn’t tell Megumi anything. Took all three of you, and eventually Tsumiki joined in, to calm her down. She was sniffling, burying her face into your neck, gripping her little hands as tightly as she could.

“Mayumi, Honey, do you feel a little better now?”

She nods into you but still holding on to you for dear life.

“Can you tell us what’s wrong? Please, Sweetheart?”

“White monster…The white monster with blue-eyes…Scary smile with pointing teeth…”

Tsumiki and Megumi looked at each other confused, you were just trying to figure out where she got that image from, while Toji held a frown before his eyes opened a bit upon realization. He has this goofy smile as he takes Mayumi from your arms and holds her in his own. Upon feeling being inside Toji’s arms, she instantly relaxes and looks up at him with a pout.

“So there’s a monster in your bedroom, Princess? You want me and your big brother Megumi to look for any monsters?”

She looks up at him with her little pout, sniffles, and nods her head quietly. Clutching to Toji like a Koala. Toji gets up with a grunt along with Megumi and they go into her room to look for the “monster”. Turning both the lights on and off along with Megumi bringing his dogs out. Mayumi watches the dogs sniff out her room, under her bed, and her closet.

“No monster, Gumi-Nii?”

Megumi pats her head softly.

“Yeah, no monsters in here, Mayumi.”

She’s still pouting even though Megumi confirmed no monsters while Toji rubs her back gently.

“Well Little Lady, you’re gonna sleep with Mama and I tonight so no monsters can get you. If there are, I’ll eat them.”

Mayumi giggles as he takes her into your shared bedroom to sleep peacefully for the night. Luckily she did as she snoozed away on his chest along with you tucked into his shoulder as your head rested on top of its side.

The next day, Satoru, Suguru, Shoko, Nanami, Haibara, and Yaga came to your house to talk about something. As they were discussing in your personal office, Mayumi knocks and she comes in to be held by you. While being held by you, you feel Mayumi shifting in your arms. You look down as she looks at Satoru with wary eyes. She clutches closer to you as she whines. Satrou looks over at her and smiles, causing her to hide into you further. By then, you noticed Satoru didn’t bring his blindfold. He brought his glasses instead so you could see the glimpses of his eyes. As soon Mayumi caught a glimpse of his eyes, she started getting uncomfortable and whining. You’re worried as you try to calm her down but nothing works. Then Toji comes in with the pitcher of water you asked for and she makes grabby hands at him. Your husband takes her in his arms and she points at Satoru while sniffling, making everyone, including you curious.

“What’s wrong this time, Mayumi?”

“Papa,” 

Points at Satoru

“White monster…big blue eyes and white teeth…that’s him…”

Everyone blinks a couple of times except for Toji who has his dastardly grin. Then the silence is broken by Suguru’s cackling followed by Haibara bursting out in laughter. Now you understand why Toji wasn’t so concerned about last night because he knew what Mayumi was talking about. The monster was random, she had a nightmare about Satoru. Nanami smirks while Yaga and Shoko chuckle at this. The only ones who weren’t anything were You and Satoru. You because you’re just shaking your head at Suguru, Toji, and Haibara. While Satoru looked like a hurt puppy that was kicked. You tried to comfort your unofficial oldest child but he just stayed hurt. He let out a sigh when he and your daughter made brief eye-contact before she hid herself in Toji, causing him to bark out in laughter. His laugh joined in with the other two. 

Toji calms down a bit before comforting Mayumi.

“Princess, that’s just Gojo. He’s not a scary monster, see? He’s harmless.”

Mayumi looks at Satoru before looking at you then Toji. She shakes her head at Toji causing him to chuckle. Mayumi says bye to everyone as she leaves the room with Toji. But Suguru wouldn’t stop teasing Satoru about it and it’s an inside joke everyone is in on.

So that’s why Satoru always wears his blindfold on because he doesn’t want to make Mayumi cry. As she gets older, she gets over it and funny enough doesn’t remember this event. No matter how much anyone brings it up, she can’t fully remember any of it. But their relationship gets better later on.

Though Mayumi’s humble, she’s spoiled. By you, Toji, Tsumiki, Megumi, your family, even Suguru and Satoru, specifically Satoru. Mayumi gets an allowance of 38,948 yen(which is roughly equivalent to $250 US dollars) from Satoru every month, and that’s not including holidays and birthdays. Toji and Satoru are fighting each other on who’s better at spoiling her to which you have to calm them down because it shouldn’t be a big deal.

Mayumi gets all sad and pouty when Megumi has to live on campus but Megumi promises to call frequently or visit once a week for her. Megumi gives her his old plushies of his twin dogs, telling her to hug them when she feels like missing him. Because of that, she is overly attached to them. She sleeps with them, goes to the bathroom with them, brings them outside to the garden, goes out, they come with her everywhere she goes.

Megumi hangs a drawing she made of him and Mayumi with his dogs in his dorm room. Also has a picture frame of him and her on his desk too.

When Megumi brings Yuuji and Nobara over, they always want to play with her. Nobara dresses her up while Yuuji shadow boxes with her. When they come over to sleep over, it’s twice the fun. Yuuji and Nobara get bummed out when it’s her bedtime but they remember they see her in the morning so it’s all good.

They also help Megumi watch and babysit her when you and Toji are out on a date/outing. It’s chaotic but it’s fun.

Toji and Megumi will be irritated and annoyed when someone, other than you and Tsumiki, asks them for anything Gojo. But once Mayumi starts asking for things, they won’t even bat an eye. She is spoiled by both her grumpy older brother and menacing father. One time you came home to see your daughter gleefully smiling at you, holding her plushie tightly as she told you about what she did with Toji and Megumi. Then you look over to see your son and husband wearing bows on their heads and had sanrio stickers all over them.

Mayumi’s such a bubbly and happy child that it’s like looking straight at the sun. Of course, she takes after you mostly both in personality and physical traits. It’s not until she’s in teens when Toji’s traits start revealing themselves in her.

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[bruciemilf]

Yk what I need??? NEED the batKids to just admire Bruce’s beauty ( USHSJSNSNS ur last post about Jason calling Bruce pretty just added fuel to the fire )

Love ur blog :)!!!

Thank you! And that’s so adorable! I just adore the image of Bruce, wide awake at 3 in the morning, applying concealer all over the swollen bruises acquired tonight.

The brush is thick and fluffy, designed to spread a generous amount while maintaining a smooth application, its bristles silver and pale. Dick thinks it belonged to Bruce’s mom, because he looks terribly sad using it.

“You should be asleep, “ Bruce sighs, not entirely delighted his ward is losing precious resting time. He’s read, clearly, that children need a minimal 8 hours of sleep.

“So should you! What are you doing up?”

“Getting ready for a meeting at 7.”

“You’re like, really pretty.”

Bruce pauses, skin blossoming with sudden, flustered heat, “Oh, thank you, Dickie, that’s very kind—“

Dick’s smile beams like moonlight, “So you agree. You think you’re really pretty.”

“…I haven’t watched a single movie in 12 years, so, I think that joke is wasted.”

“Dammit. Thanks a lot, trauma.”

Oh, but Jason? The tiny boy could watch Bruce for hours. His face is so interesting. B’s eyelashes are so long, and his eyes are such a pretty hazel, just like Catherine’s, and his smile is awesome.

He feels really special, because Bruce smiles for no camera, but when Jason asks him to take his picture, he does it without complaint.

“B, boys can be pretty too, right?”

Bruce pauses a bit, not entirely confident. Should he treat this as something casual? Should he break out the educational, but welcoming dialogue? Is it something else? Why aren’t there parenting classes?

“Hn. Yeah.”

“I think you’re the prettiest man in Gotham!”

“I’m afraid that’s not true, Jason.”

“What?! How come?!”

“Because the prettiest boy in Gotham is standing right in front of me.”

Tiny Jason squeaking and squealing joyfully while Bruce takes him in his arms, peppering his soft cheeks with kisses, while a teenage Dick rolls his eyes in the background, trying not to smile.

[i-upset-to-dead-65]

How I imagine Snow's progression of being reminded of Lucy Gray throughout the Hunger Games trilogy

1. Katniss volunteers. How cute. She has no chance of living past the bloodbath. Her name sounds familiar.

2. Katniss scores an 11 in training. So what she shot an arrow at the game makers. Well, that 11 will put a target on her and she's no match for the rest.

3. Peeta reveals he is in love with Katniss. What an interesting angle. Definitely some kind of ploy. Viewership will be up, as well as sponsors. Interesting to see how this plays out.

4. Katniss is trapped by the careers and Peeta. Aw, look, she dropped a hive on her boyfriend. Looks like she doesn't like him after all.

5. Katniss allies with Rue. Odd, and a terrible choice for an ally.

6. Rue mentions her pin, a mockingjay. The connection is made. Katniss, that swamp potato dug up by Lucy Gray and her mockingjays that still infest the districts. His dislike for Katniss grows.

7. Rue dies and Katniss sings the Meadow Song to her. A jolt runs up his spine. That old song, sung to Maude Ivory by Lucy Gray. It's still around in District 12 and now it's on national television. Snow knows how much the Capitol loves singing tributes.

8. The new rules are announced. This will be interesting. Of course, there's no way Peeta will live long enough for there to actually be two victors.

9. Katniss and Peeta are in the cave, and Peeta begins to recover. The huge influx of sponsored gifts is concerning. Katniss will hopefully die at the Feast trying to get medicine.

10. Peeta makes a full recovery. That wasn't supposed to happen, but the Capitol loves it.

11. Cato dies. Seneca didn't think they'd get this far. Time to revoke the rule change. Katniss will kill Peeta or vice versa. These children barely know each other, and in the Games they resort to their basic human nature of violence. Oh look, she's even pointing her bow at him.

12. The berries. The double victory. Seneca Crane is a dead man. They have outsmarted the idiot game makers. Snow is once again reminded of his cheating in order to help Lucy Gray win. How well that turned out for her in the end.

13. After the games. Snow is certain they are putting on an act to survive and meanwhile, defy the Capitol. Peeta is good with the crowd and is quick witted. So much like Lucy Gray. Katiss is impulsive and heartfelt. So much like Sejanus.

14. Snow learns Katniss hunts in the woods, he possibly traces her lineage, and he finds out everything he can about her. Snow takes measures to quell the rebellion brewing and control Katniss and Peeta throughout Catching Fire.

15. Katniss's wedding dress burns away into a Mockingjay dress. That damn bird again.

16. The force field gets blown out, and tributes escape. Snow recalls when the 10th Hunger Games arena was bombed.

17. Katniss's first propo is televised in the districts, declaring herself the Mockingjay. He should have killed all those birds when he had a chance.

18. The Hanging Tree propo airs. He'd almost forgotten Lucy Gray's songs. How could this girl, now, know them? The song was banned, Lucy Gray was dead. She was dead, right?

19. The rebels in District 5 sing the Hanging Tree while blowing up the damn. Chills run up his spine as he watches the live feed. A crowd of an indiscernable number flood the walkways to the hydro dam. They're singing a song they didn't know yesterday. A song no one knew until now. A song that was as dead as Lucy Gray. Except, she wasn't dead. How could she be, if her song is still sung? The dam blows and the lights go out in the Capitol. Snow half expects the ghost of Lucy Gray herself to appear before him.

20. The war is over. The Mockingjay has won. She appeared from nowhere, echoing the songs of Lucy Gray like the birds themselves. Well played, Lucy Gray. Well played.

[hoe4sports]

It was always you

Jessie Fleming x reader

A/N: She’s long y’all

Warning: Divorce? None really

Summary: Post divorce, thinks have fallen into a rythm developing over the span of years. But one of you, falls out of that rythm and struggles keeping up.

Divorce. You couldn’t pinpoint exactly when it happened. Not the administrative part of the divorce with lawyers, documents, protocol and court; but the emotional part of the divorce. You had spent hours in the early stages of your divorce trying to figure out what went wrong, analysing every aspect of your relationship.

Sure, things had undoubly gotten tougher after adding a second child to the mix. But, the second child didn’t feel like the reason as to why the slipping apart had happened. Jessie had been the one to bring up the possibility of divorce; thinking it would solve all your problems. It was a civil divorce, you and your ex-wife only wanting the best for your children. Never talking bad about each other in front of the girls, never bringing new girlfriends into the family.

Your kids were happy, they felt loved and they were well taken care of. To you and Jessie, that was all that mattered. Your oldest, Lilly was a hopeless romantic. Even at 6 years old, she would beg her mom to buy flowers for you. It was one of the traits that she had gotten from Jessie. Your other daughter, Eden, had walked in her sister’s shoes, adapting her sister’s romantic trait into her own personality.

The agreement on the kids was easy, one week each, living in the same neighbourhood only 5 minutes apart for each other. It made the divorce easier on the kids, knowing that their other mom was right up the road. Every other holiday, and a few weeks each summer for travel was shared between the pair of you.

This particular day, you found yourself sitting outside on the front porch waiting for Jessie to drop the kids off. She had taken your 12 and 8 year old to Canada for some well needed family time. You didn’t mind, you had know Jessie’s family for years and they were the most welcoming group of people. They still invited you on vacations and Christmas, claiming that you were still family. It was funny, you and Jessie had both dated other girls in the span of time since the divorce. But, nothing had ever lasted.

When you saw Jessie’s car pulling up, you looked at your Golden retriever, Murphy and tapped his head. “Look Murph, the girls are home!” You cheered in your puppy voice. He was an old man now, 12 years old, but he was still young at heart.

When Eden hopped out, Murphy sprinted towards the driveway while wiggling his tail. “Murph! Mama!” Eden yelled while running towards you with only one shoe. She crashed into your legs and wrapped her arms around your frame. “I missed you mama” she whispered while squeezed your legs extra hard. “I missed you too doll” you comforted while rubbing her back before she slipped inside to find her Barbie dolls.

“Where is my teen?” You yelled out while your daughter very quietly walked towards you. She was moving into her “cool teenage” phase of her life, and she never wanted to do anything “uncool”.

“Hi mama” she said calmly once coming to greet you. You instantly wrapped her into a hug. “I missed you lots my little girl” you whispered into her hair before giving her kisses on her cheeks. “Okay, okay, I’m gonna go to my room and call Kennedy” she said while wiping off the kiss eager to talk to her bestfriend.

Jessie came up with the girls suitcases smiling with her cap on. “Hi, here’s their bags. Mom washed most of their clothes so it wouldn’t be too much on you” she stated while placing carrying the suitcases up the little stairs with Murphy in her heels. After she placed down the suitcases, she turned around to your puppy and gave him pets. He instantly got excited wiggling his butt like only golden’s can.

“Hi Jess, how was Canada?”

“Good, I love showing the girls off to the family. I’m so proud of them, it’s ridiculous”

“I’m glad, how is momma?”

“She’s good, healthy. Back doing her water aerobics twice a week. She told me to give you a hug from her” Jessie shrugged while looking at the tips of her shoes.

You wrapped her into a hug, just like the old days. It wasn’t unusual for you to hug, but this hug felt different. Perhaps it was because it was from her mom, you figured. The hug lasted longer than usual, a sense of uncertainty lingering in the air.

“She told me to convince you to come to Canada. Grandma misses you too” Jessie said while finally looking up at you blushing.

“Aaw, that’s so sweet! But, you know I can’t” you finished looking at Murphy who was shoving his head in your hand.

“Right, right, see you next week?” Jessie said, eager to wrap up the conversation. It wasn’t really like her. Normally, she had plenty of time to chat and hang around.

“Busy? Are you meeting up with someone? Someone special?” You teased poking her shoulder. She gave you a faint smile.

“Something like that” She replied with a smirk on her face. You smiled politely back at her feeling uneasy about her dating some new, but at this point in life; it had been years since the last date with another woman. The pair of you said your goodbyes before you entered your home with the girls suitcases. “Well”, you thought to yourself, “I have to get to working on this unpacking”.

-

Later that day, you found yourself stood in the kitchen in front of the stove cooking up some pancakes for the girls to eat before bedtime. This was a tradition you had since they were young; every Sunday you sat down as a family and ate pancakes before bedtime while taking about anything and everything.

“Mama, I made you a picture! Do you wanna see it?” Your youngest squealed, in love with art from a young age. “Yes love, I always want to see your art” you confirmed while flipping the last pancake. Eden ran upstairs to her room to get her binder. It held drawings from when she was just a baby back in kindergarten. You loved taking care of the art, knowing that watching the pictures was a glimpse into her head at that time.

Your oldest appeared from the living room at the smell of pancakes. “Are the pancakes ready soon? Do you want any help?” She asked leaning into your side wanting some affection. You wrapped your arm around her side holding her in your embrace. “If you want to, you could set the table?” You suggested in which she immediately nodded to and got to work. Even though she was becoming a teenager, she was still always wanting to be helpful and close to her mom.

Eden came tumbling down the stairs with her files bringing it into the kitchen flipping through the pages. “Here it is! I already put it in, but it’s me, nana, Lilly and mommy in Canada! And this, this is Elena’s dog.” She said while pointing to something that looked more like a sheep than a dog. You scrunched your nose when your daughter mentioned Elena, Jessie’s Canadian ex. You didn’t know that they had seen Elena in Canadian which was out of character for Jessie. “Wow, amazing! Did you see Elena in Canada?” You asked eagerly without wanting to snoop around. “Yes, she came for dinner. Nana made a roast” she said as she shrugged. The thought made you uncomfortable, and you immediately decided to change the topic.

“Alright girls, pancakes are ready” you announced flopping the last pancake onto the plate and turning towards the table. The three of you sat down at the dark oak table chatting lightly about school and football. The girls both played football, and both of them were excited for school to start.

“So, how was Canada girls?” You asked while looking at Lilly. Lilly shrugged her shoulders just like teenagers do. “We went to this market with lots of little stands were people sold lots of things. I even saw someone selling crochet frogs!” Eden said excitedly happily munching on her food. “Wow, did you buy it?” You followed up. “No, they only had green and I wanted pink, so I got a pink scrunchie instead!” She continued blabbering on about Canada.

After pancakes and washing up, the girls had both gotten ready for bed. You checked your youngest first, who was soundly asleep holding on to her stuffed sheep. You reached for the duvet and pulled it up wrapping her in like when she was little. Then, you headed to Lilly’s room. Her room was tidy, but that was one of her traits: she was very organised.

“Hi mama” she said while yawning in her bed, a book in her lap. “Hi baby, ready for bed?” You asked scooting into her bed wrapping your arms around her. “Yea..” she started before tearing up a bit, quickly swallowing her tears away. “I missed you mom, it’s not the same without you” your daughter pleaded leaning towards your chest. “I missed you too doll, and I wish things weren’t like this. I know that Eden dosent really remember when me and mommy used to live together, but I know you do. It’s very valid and I wish we could’ve worked it out.” You assured her feeling her relax in your arms. Hair long hair was hanging on her shoulders, and you immediately started humming while brushing through her locks with your hands.

After a few minutes, her breathing had slowed down and she showed signs of being asleep. You eased her out of your arms and into her bed before kissing her forehead, and moving towards the door. Your hands reached for the light switch, but before you could turn it off; you heard a voice. “You know that mom still is in love with you?” she whispered out her eyes being closed, just moments away from falling asleep. “Good night, princess. I love you forever” you hushed leaving her room quietly. Both the girls preferred to sleep with their door slightly open, just in case they need their mom. You loved it, making you feel like you are still the mom to two little girls instead of soon teenagers.

You hopped down the stairs to clean up the kitchen, the words of your daughter lingering in the back of your head. You had been warned about kids of divorce wanting their parents to get back together, but this felt different. She had previously begged you to go on a date with her teacher, convinced that you were a match.

As you cleared the table, plate by plate being moved into the dishwasher, you couldn’t help but think about what life could’ve been like. You and Jessie had met young, just after she had gone to Europe and you stayed together for over 10 years. It was weird how it all came to an end, you couldn’t really remember why you ended things. Maybe it was a silly argument? Or maybe Jessie’s busy lifestyle?

After clearing the table, you went to wipe off the surface noticing your daughter’s book of drawings. You sat down in front of it, opening it and watching picture by picture pass. Hours upon hours of work, all to be shown to her family. She took pride in her drawings, drawing her feelings.

One picture was two houses next to each other. One person infront of each door, two little girls moving between houses. It was cute, all of them looked happy. That was the confusing part for you; why would Lilly say that Jessie was still in love with you, when she seemed perfectly happy with the custody solution.

The next picture was with your daughter in bed, your puppy sleeping next to her. She had always loved the golden retriever. Even back when she was a little girl, she would occasionally fall asleep leaning onto the dog. It was a relationship like no other.

As you sat and admired the pictures, you heard the sound of your dogs paws shuffling downstairs. He immediately waked into the kitchen and looked at you while whining.

“Are you waiting for me to come night night?” You asked in your puppy voice. The dog immediately wagged his tail in excitement bonking his nose into your leg. You got up from the chair, and brought the book of drawings with you, following your dog to your bedroom door. After opening up your bedroom, he leaped into your bed taking his usual spot by the pillow. He ways slept with you, you hadn’t really slept next to anyone but Jessie. Expect from your girls, but that dosent count.

After finishing up your skincare, you stood by the sink brushing your teeth listening to the soft snores of your dog. It made you smile seeing him knocked out, the excitement of having the girls back bringing him joy.

As you brushed your teeth, you flipped through the book of drawings watching her arts. Fingers tracing the drawings, taking notice of each carefully placed line. One of the pictures, had stuck to you. It was a picture of you, Jessie and your two girls eating ice cream in the park. She naturally had included Murphy in the picture, adding an ice cream to the top of his head. You giggled looking at it, quickly finishing your brushing to take a picture of the drawing.

You

Look what Eden drew, she’s hilarious!

*photo attached*

Seen

You huffed in annoyance when Jessie left you on read, assuming she was busy doing some kind of football related stretch at home. The lights were then turned off, and you were quick to go to bed.

-

A few months later, the summer was over and school was back. Luckily for you, the girls loved school. Eden’s favourite subject was Math and Lilly’s favourite subject was science. You truly felt blessed by having kids that were this easy.

“Is mommy coming over later?” Eden asked nervously fumbling with her backpack. You looked into the rear view mirror. “Of course she is” you confirmed giving your Oscar winning smile. Truth was that Jessie had missed out on your weekly dinners for the last few weeks. It wasn’t just you who were bothered by it, so was your girls.

“Bye mommy!” Eden shouted jumping out of your car before skipping down to the school meeting up with her friends. The group of them walked in together. It was routine, they always waited for each other.

This morning after dropping the girls off, the annoyance you had felt regarding Jessie was rapidly growing. She had changed for the worse since the end of the summer: never answering your messages or your calls. Forgetting to come to family dinners. It annoyed you to a t when Lilly came beaming downstairs saying that she had talked to Jessie on the phone.

Your solution to this was having Eden ask Jessie over for dinner. Now, it wasn’t unusual for you to have dinner together. It was fairly normal on your household; but Jessie hadn’t answered your invitations. However, you knew that she would do anything for her daughters.

That was how you had ended up cooking favourite meal; your authentic pasta carbonara after work. If she wasn’t gonna talk to you, she was gonna be forced to eat your food in your presence.

“Mama, I think she’s coming!” Eden yells excitedly jumping up and down making Murphy bark while happily wagging his butt. Your oldest came skipping down the stairs when she heard your youngest announcement.

Eden opened the door up and full on launched at Jessie, wrapping her body around her like a koala. “Mommy, you came!” She giggled holding Jessie tight. “Of course, anything for my girls” Jessie said while hugging her back.

When she moved inside, she quickly petted Murphy before wrapping your oldest into a bear hug holding her tight. “How are you today, girls?” She asked looking at the pair of them. Eden looked like she was about to burst out information, but eagerly looked at her sister’s approval.

“Go ahead, Eds” Lilly giggled knowing what was about to happen.

“Okay, so today at maths this stupid boy, Jacob, threw a pencil at me! So I hid his calculator, and then after maths, I had lunch! It was chicken, I just love chicken! And then, Tilly told me about how she and her parents are going to France for Christmas and she promised me a postcard, and THEN, we had a pop quiz in English and I had no mistakes so I got a sticker AND THEN when I walked home, I saw a squirrel!” She said spewing out all her thoughts making you and her sister giggle while Jessie stood with wide eyes looking at her.

“Oh my, sounds like you had an eventful day” Jessie said scratching the back of her neck. “What about your day, Lils?”

“Hmm, it was okay. Kennedy and I played football with the boys during recess.” She shrugged in her typical teenage character.

“Wow,did they play rough?” Jessie wondered.

“Well, duuh! But it’s okay because I’m faster and I’m better, so they can’t catch me” Lilly brags proudly crossing her arms in front of her chest.

“You are so clever, I’m so proud of you both” Jessie said pulling both her girls into a hug.

-

At the dinner table, conversation was somewhat limited. Jessie didn’t really take initiative to talk to you, rather talking to you through the girls. The girls happily chatted along with her. It was weird, you thought, feeling like a stranger in your own home.

While munching on pasta Eden decided to drop a bomb.

“Mommy, do you miss living in our house?” Eden asked curiously looking Jessie dead in the eye. Jessie immediately chocked on a piece of pasta making her cough while having a terrified look in her face. Lilly shot you a look whispering “this is about to be good” making you smile of her sassy comment.

“Uh, I mean, I miss seeing you girls everyday, but I have my house now” Jessie tried hoping the answer was enough for Eden.

“But your house is small, I like this house better” Eden complained forcing you to turn around to not break out in laughter. She pouted her lips and crossed her arm. Your eyes shifted to your oldest who looked like she was about to collapse into a laughing fit, making you smiles

“Yea, i get that..” Jessie tried before looking towards you for help. “How is work?” You asked giving her a helping hand out of the awkwardness. Jessie shot you a look mixed of relief and gratitude before nodding. “It’s good, I’m going back to play with Canada soon. We have a game against Norway” Jessie finished.

“Where is Norway?” Eden asked curiously. “It’s at the top of Europe, close to the North Pole” Lilly lectured, making her sister’s eyes widen at the answer. “Wow, I wanna go to the North Pole! Mommy, can I come? And Lilly? And mama?” She begged giving Jessie her best puppy dog eyes .

Jessie looked sweaty for the millionth time during dinner, once again looking at your for help. “Norway is very far away, but maybe we can make it work? I’ll talk to mom about it after bedtime” you reassured your youngest carbon copy of Jessie. She seemed happy with the response and munched happily on her pasta again.

After the four of you had finished eating, the whole family was helping clearing the table. Jessie still hadn’t said much except typical polite talk, not normal to her considering she was quite the talker. Just as you finished cleaning, Jessie announced her departure.

“Mommy, can’t you stay until bedtime? Please mommy, you are never here at mama’s house anymore” Eden begged with her big brown eyes looking up at Jessie. She tugged on Jessie’s arm trying to launch onto her. Jessie’s cheeks flushed, and she rubbed her neck searching for the smallest bit of comfort. “Uh..I..Well, I have early practice tomorrow…” She stuttered seeing her daughter’s heart break in front of her. Eden’s shoulders lowered, and her face turned into a frown. “Okay, okay mom, thats fine. Mama always have time to read my bedtime story.. Bye” Eden turned around and walked upstairs, her sister giving Jessie an annoyed look.

“Doll, would you mind going after your sister? I’ll say bye to mama, and then I’ll be right there, pinkypromise” Lilly nodded her head, moving up the stairs to find her sister. But before she walked away from the stairs, she turned to look down at Jessie.

“Jessie, I think you really hurt sissy. She misses family dinners, and family nights, she talked about this all week. But it’s okay, because mama is always here to pick up the pieces, always making up excuses for you so that Eden dosent feel sad” she spat out leaving you feeling caught off guard while Jessie felt like the worst human in the world. Hearing her daughter call her out, and call her what was her government name instead of her most valued title.

Jessie felt uneasy, not sure how to handle the situation. All she wanted, was to get out of the house that she once had lived in. A part of her didn’t understand how you managed to live in the house with only the girls and your dog. How you were able to live in a house that was once filled with endless love. With to happy parents. Because recently, whenever she came over to pick up the girls or drop them off, she felt this heavy feeling in her gut having regrets about the divorce.

You heard your youngest sob upstairs before her bedroom door shut closed again. Jessie’s gaze met yours, and you gave her a sad look. “I’m gonna go deal with the girls, and I think you should leave.” You said moving towards the stairs. “You have the key, lock the door on the way out” you asked while moving upwards. Jessie stood still at the bottom of the stars on the verge of tears. “And for reference, I don’t know what’s going on with you lately; but you really hurt them, you know” and with that, you cleared the staircase moving in direction of your girls. At the drop of your last word, Jessie felt the tears press in her eyes. She looked at the staircase debating whenever to go after you, but she was too embarrassed of her own actions.

All Jessie wanted was for her family to feel prioritised, and important. But all she felt like she had done, was that she had failed you. She failed her duties as a wife, failed her marriage, she failed your agreements after the divorce and now she had failed her children. It hurt more than she could’ve ever imagined, and she quickly turned around to leave the house, locking the door on the way out.

You embraced your youngest who was sobbing in your arms, her older sister sitting across from you. “Eden, I’m sure she doesn’t mean it like that” you spoke trying to comfort the little girl. “But mama, she never used to be like this when I was a baby” Eden’s sob forced her to stop mid sentence, her clinging to you like back when she was a baby that didn’t want to go to kindergarten.

“I know love, and it’s not right of her to be like this to you, to both of you girls.” You said, trying to take notice of your oldest’s state of mind. “Mom..Do you think she doesn’t love us? Maybe she has found another family with another mom with other kids and other dogs and other houses..” your oldest spat out on the verge of tears. Their statements were bearing witness of the hormones about to change them from little girls to hormonal teenagers.

“Okay, girls. I know that we are feeling sad, and that’s okay. We are allowed to feel whatever we are feeling, it’s valid. But, I think your mom is going through something that makes her feel distant and spacey. She hasn’t been like this before. How about I try to talk to her?” You negotiated, trying to spare Jessie’s reputation. The girls nodded while sniffling in synch.

“How about we go to my bedroom, and we can watch tv until we fall asleep in mommy’s bed?” You suggested watching a spark light up in the girls eyes. They immediately eyed each other while nodding before getting up racing down the hallway, your dog bouncing after them. It made your heart swell: your daughter’s wholeheartedly giggles and your dog’s happy barks.

-

After the girls fell asleep, you got out of bed and sneaked yourself downstairs with your phone feeling determined to get an answer out of Jessie. You immediately dialed her number, waiting for her to pick up.

“Hi.. Is everything okay?”

“Hi, Jess. It’s me. What’s up?”

“What do you mean? I just got out of the shower, about to get ready for bed”

You rolled your eyes over her trying to play off cool.

“Stop being a comedian, it’s not working. What’s up with you recently?”

Jessie held a long silence terrified to say something wrong, that was if she could get something out.

“It’s nothing”

“Jess..”

“What? It’s nothing!”

You could hear Jessie getting annoyed, and for some reason: that annoyed you. She knew that you had figured out that she was going through something, and she hated that. You let out a groan in annoyance.

“For fucks sake, Jessie. We were married for many years, we had kids together; I know you better than this. Something is wrong, but you refuse to talk about it.”

Jessie felt like she was getting scolded, and perhaps that was what she needed; someone to talk sense into her. The truth was that everyone had noticed: her coaches had benched her, her teammates were confused and her mom was worried. Jessie hated carrying around this big bomb because it felt like it was about to explode at any second.

“Uh..It’s just..I should maybe talk to you about this in person”

A part of her felt like this might be good for her. To talk to someone about the problem. Someone who wouldn’t judge, and surely the woman she had kids with wouldn’t judge her for anything.

“Is it another woman?”

Jessie gasped in shock. How could you believe that?

“Sorry, but what?”

“Is there another woman? It’s fine if it is, I’m happy for you”

Jessie felt like throwing up by the thought of another woman. She didn’t want other women: she wanted her woman.

“Yea no, how about i stop by after work tomorrow?”

Jessie suggested, mentally kicking herself for forcing a conversation about the topic.

“After 21, then the girls will be asleep and we’ll have some privacy”

“O-okay, see you tomorrow then?”

“See you soon, Jess”

Jessie hung up feeling her heart beat rapidly, terrified of what was to come. She had lost you once, and she was terrified to lose you again. If you didn’t want to coparent with her anymore; that would be devastating for her. Possibly, career ending. She missed seeing you and the girls in the stands. She missed having the girls as her mascots. She missed having you come down to the pitch with the girls after games, Jessie chasing around Lilly while you carried Eden who was still a bay. Tears filled Jessie’s eyes as she sat on the edge of her bed. Tears of fear, frustration and anger for the divorce she had ended up in.

-

The following evening, you put the girls to bed waiting until they were asleep before texting Jessie to come over. You were happy to sort out whatever Jessie’s sudden problems was, just hoping that it wasn’t gonna be something related to your kids. A wave of nervousness dawned upon you, which lead to to quickly tidy up the house. Cups were moved to the dishwasher, the floor was hoovered and you made sure to fluff the pillows up. 10 minutes later, you heard knocking on your door.

Jessie stood nervously outside of the door waiting for you to open up the door. A part of her felt uneasy about opening up the door to let herself in; this wasn’t her home anymore, and she wanted to respect your boundaries.

You flung open the door looking at her with a smile, but you frowned when you saw her sad face.

“Damn, is this going to be one of those conversations?” You mumbled underneath your breath feeling Jessie’s sadness flare onto you. Jessie shot you a dirty look before mumbling something along the lines of “I heard that”.

“Feel free to sit”

You wanted her to take the lead on the situation, that way she could control the conversation. She slowly sat down on the couch looking like she was about to shit her own pants.

“Jessie? You seem like you are about to pass out. Relax! I’ve seen you naked” you teased hoping to make Jessie laugh, but your attempt at humor only got rewarded with a chuckle.

Jessie gulped trying to swallow the dry feeling in her throat without much success. She watched you sit down in the chair across from her, making her feel insecure.

You looked at her, waiting for her to talk.

“Jess? It’s okay, you can talk about whatever you want to, I won’t judge” you comforted her trying to meet her gaze. Jessie’s eye were glued to the floor, not bothering to give you as much as a glance.

“Could you maybe sit here?” Jessie spoke out, voice just above a whisper. Her hand patted the couch pillow next to her. You immediately got up and sat down next to her. Your feet sat down crisscross and you turned to face her.

“What’s going on, love?” You said looking into her eyes, her old nickname slipping out of your lips like air. Her heart fluttered over the use of her nickname, feeling an ache to have things back to what they once were.

Jessie looked up at you trying to find words, but she couldn’t spell out a single syllable. Her face ended up looking like a fish heaping for air rather than a person trying to speak.

“Here”, you said, “take me hand” you suggested offering your hand to her. She grabbed your hand back without thinking, making her feel dumb for looking so desperate.

She looked up at you trying to figure out how to drop the bomb on you. She couldn’t speak. She ended up just sighing again and again.

“Jessie?”

Her gaze met yours, eyes looking fragile and vulnerable.

“Talk to me, please”

You wiped away a tear from her cheek, scared of whatever was gonna come out from her mouth. Worried that someone might be sick, that she was going to transfer to another team or that she had done something dumb.

“Listen, the girls and I just want what’s best for you. I can see that you are suffering inside, please, talk to me. I want to help” you pleaded looking into her eyes, rubbing her thigh carefully.

Jessie sniffed before taking in a deep breath.

“The reason I have been so distant lately…” she started, but stopping as her word came to a loss.

“I talked to my mom when we were in Canada, and she made me realise a few things”

You nodded encouraging while offering her a smile. Her words came to a stop again, not sure how to handle the situation.

“Alright, keep going” you whispered giving her hand a squeeze. “It’s just me, love”, you said trying your best to support her.

“You see, that’s the problem. It is you. It was always you.” Jessie blurted out making you feel confused.

“Uh, I’m sorry?” You tried, not sure why you were offering your apologies when you couldn’t pinpoint what you had done wrong.

“No, no, god no! It’s not something to be sorry about..”

“Then what is it?” You responded, frustration lingering underneath your skin.

Jessie looked at you, at a loss for words once again. Her gaze felt intense, like she was staring into your soul. Her face moved towards yours.

“It was always you, y/n” Jessie whispered before closing the gap between you. The kiss lasted for a few seconds before you both pulled apart. You looked at Jessie, feeling confused.

“I miss you, I miss us. Leaving you, the kids, hell even Murphy was the biggest mistake of my life. The divorce was the biggest mistake of my life, and I know that you probably don’t feel the same anymore, and that’s okay. But I just, ugh, nobody will ever compare to you. I want you back, I want our life back, I want to wake up next to you again and know that I made the best decision when I married you.I don’t even know how to g-“

“Shut up, and kiss me Jess” you responded looking in her eyes feeling touched by the vulnerability of the moment. Jessie looked into your eyes before closing them and closing the gap between us, starting the process of rebuilding what once had been torn apart.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Getting hot under the collar and in the kitchen and on the pool table and...

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Aug 2024 Week 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) eps 3-4 of 12 - one of the things I'm enjoying about this show is the fact that the introverted super shy uke is having hot fantasies, and the extroverted seme is having the sweet fantasies. It's another way this show is highlighting God being the world's greenest flagged seme BL has ever produced. (And he's being given stiff competition this year - trend alert.)

Anygay: God is so cute and so not cool and so in love and all the consent asking word salad coming out of this boy. I LOVE him. 

Diew: It’s ep 4 so I’ve decided we can talk face-to-face.  God: So how many children do you want? 

The teaching him to play basketball bit, where God politely asks to hold his hand, is so freaking adorable I can’t.

I'm thinking of calling this show the anti-Mame pill.

Blue pill? Red pill? GREEN pill!

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 11 of 12 - We gotta talk. I do like this version, but it’s starting to feel lackluster. Perhaps it always was by comparison to the bright sparkle uniqueness of the original. Perhaps I didn't notice because I was distracted by G4. But now I gotta say it's become a bit disappointing and even my love for G4 can’t seem to bind me to this. Frankly, this show is making me want to watch either the Japanese version, or My School President. It’s never a good sign when a currently airing BL makes me want to stop that and go rewatch an old one I’ve already seen.

NO SINGING.

Meanwhile, the "locked on the rooftop" trope! I haven’t seen that one in years. Cool. Also cute kisses. They learning. 

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 7 of 8 - I can’t believe this is ending next week. But also I can. And I have thoughts.

I really love SailubPon. They might be one of my favorite newer pairs on the scene right now. But I just don’t believe in these characters or this couple. I don’t feel like they are going to have a lasting relationship. It feels like they’re just using each other for sex and distraction, and that’s how the script to set it up, and as a result they’re never gonna make it as a couple. As soon as the sexual fire between them burns out, what do they have to build a relationship on? Frankly? That would be fine if this were a modern love drama, and not a BL. But this IS a BL.

Putting the health code violators aside, I really do believe in the secondary pair, but they haven’t been given enough bandwidth to develop as a couple. There’s no way they’re going to adequately resolve Methas and JJ in the final episode.

At this juncture, I’m mostly finding this show annoying. Which in itself is annoying, because I wanted to love it.

Why is it that Thailand, the land of the best food in the world, king of BLs, struggles so hard to produce the restaurant set BL of my dreams? I’m really pissed about this.

That said, the Methas & JJ stuff is killer. Loved JJ running away. So good. Plus the age old decision - love or money? 

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 2-3 of 12 - The issue was me and I've managed to get hold of this show again. The story within the story is so ridiculously badly written I'm going spare. I’m not sure if the outside show is not ALSO badly written. That said, I do love how the 3 writer friends are all shipping our leads. It’s VERY silly. Meanwhile, cohabitation trope is a go. 

I like the side couple too. Stern Daddy + lost puppy is a very cute dynamic, I hope we get more than just crumbs. I actually am enjoying this show now. Ep 3 kinda derailed into this weird chimera novel that they’re all writing together and I’m finding that bit the least interesting, but I adore the domestic components which I think may turn out to be TutorYim's strength (if they're allowed to lean into it). 

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - Man I hope this gets some kind of distribution at some point. It was a pain to find and watch. But I enjoyed it. The focus is more on the seme in Thailand’s version. Which I don’t mind since that's rare in BL, and it’s more August on my screen. It’s all round softer than China’s version but still feels very familiar. I know some fans are struggling with it, but not me.

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 10 of 12 - I like that Sam’s crafty business espionage has paid off. Them teasing Sam & Yo really had me belly laughing. It was so funny.

Legitimate question. Would one put perfume on one’s cheeks in Thailand, as one does on wrist or sternum? Because of the sniff cheek thing? Scented face powders?

I do feel like with MosBank & SailubPon scorching up our screens, we’re being spoiled by some of Thailand‘s best high heat pairs at the moment.

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 5 of 12 - It remains kind of sweet and cute. It's also calm and slow moving. Oddly it reminds me of La Cuisine in its style and execution (if not content). I’m enjoying it more than I thought I would.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 7 of 12 - I don’t know. I’m getting bored.

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 10fin - Fort’s acting during the break-up was truly great. But I feel for Rak. It’s rough to learn that someone else is playing a long game with feelings while you were playing a short game with d**k.

Ultimately this is probably a solid 8/10 show but I’m mad I wasn’t madder at it, and I'm mad I was so bored throughout. So it gets a 7/10 and let us not speak of this again. I’d like to simply forget about it. Trash watch.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun grey) ep 1-2 of 10 - OMG a uni student who looks young and a... COP! GAH. The subversion and kink of it all. I had to go grey to get it and I hate everything about what I had to do. But ya know what? Fucking worth every single repeated crash-causing advertisement.

I love it. The grumpy lonely little student cook and the cheerful mature police officer. What a fabulous dynamic. Is the cook looking for a boyfriend or a Daddy, and do we care if it has the same result? It is filmed VERY manga style camp. I’m a little nervous about that, but this means it’s also very fluffy and so damn sweet. It made me squeak with the cute. I’m gutted this didn’t get distribution.

Ironic that Tawada Hideya is in a new BL while Sunspot is re-airing.

Cosmetic Playlover (Japan Tues Gaga) eps 3-4 of 8 - Ah, the gays are doubting the bisexual again. How familiar. I like how this one is paced and moving through time, even if the relationship seems to be going comparatively slowly by contrast. I love the way Sahashi is always looking at Natsume, even when they’re in conversation with someone else. Ah yearning. I think the conflict was kind of inevitable, given the two personalities of the protagonists, and I like that. (No manufactured angst here.) But I still hope they can repair the breach and I’m still interested. Frankly this is so classically Japan - I don’t know what story beats it’s following and I’m not entirely sure where it’s going, but I kinda like that unpredictability. Makes me think it could go into "must you, Japan?" territory but fingers crossed.

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 9 of 10 - I'm enjoying it very much. I could do without the girl character. I know she’s more interesting than most (this is Japan after all), but she’s not really for me. It’s the complexity of the connection between the leads (and why they like each other) that’s being executed so brilliantly in this show (and in the manga, FYI). Both actors are so on point with their roles and the nuanced emotions required of these characters that every time it’s only them interacting I'm riveted. I could do without the rest of the cast tho.

Seoul Blues (Korea Fri? YouTube) ep 1 of 8 - I have a confession to make, I’ve been watching this whole series as it goes along. But this is the pair I absolutely like the most. I’m not sure I would necessarily recommend any of the installments, and I’m not sure how this one is going to go, but I’m VERY invested in this particular couple. They are so pretty!!!! This is a true friends-to-lovers struggle. I like that a lot. (Reminds me of I Cannot Reach You but a different dynamic.) Did I mention how pretty they are? And we already know they gonna kiss well. I bet the uncut version is stellar.

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - It's no one's funeral, turns out! Reports are in - not only are there kisses but it ends happily with wedding plans. So I'm eating crow, binging the fucker, and live blogging. I'm enjoying it. Ya'll know I adored Chinese BL before censorship. It has a certain unhinged quality I very much apreciate (and is the reason I'm so tolerant of the Thai pulps) that I think will marry well with Wuxia's effervescent and ever-present tropes. Watch me suffer here.

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) eps 1-2 of 12 - About a singer with stage fright and his timid fan starring Charles (H4 the puppy one) and Michael Chang (the youngster in My Tooth Your Love), plus side couple featuring a Thai actor Jame (Koh in Gen Y) and Liu Min Ting (of Guardian fame). What a damn team. With their powers combined they are...

fine.

This is a fine BL. The fight scene was fun and I like the meet cute. I’m not sure about the chemistry of the leads, but I think they’ll probably do okay. I admit I’m struggling a bit with a singing and the music. Are you surprised? I think I like it enough, but I’m not wowed.

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 7 of 10 - Oh! Out of the blue attack kiss. What IS this show? I don’t get it at all. Bah. I guess they’re dating now. It’s… so odd...

It's airing but...

4 Minutes (Thai Netflix/Grey) - A rich boy at uni suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future. I have a source, but I've decided to hold off and binge if it ends okay, since it's only 8 eps. I depend upon y'all to tell me if it's safe.

8/16 The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) ? eps - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something. Again delayed? Not sure what's going on with this one but the continued push-backs do not bode well.

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer IS COMING IN SEPTEMBER!!!! (Yeah this is gonna sit here until then).

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming This Month!

8/22 The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) 12 eps - announced in 2023 this one has a high school set stepbrothers trope and is reputed to be high heat. From Taiwan! It's made for me. Based on a novel Mou Mou from the Your Name Engraved Herein folks, so it could go dark. Still, I'm very excited.

8/22 The Paradise of Thorns (Thai movie) theater release - Jeff Satur is back but this does not look like a BL (the gay lover's death is the inciting event). More in Goodbye Mother vein. Looks dark and dramatic. He opposite and extremely well known actor Toey Pongsakorn who has never done gay before.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

WHY IS HE SO FINE?

I truly belly laughed. Sam & Yo did not go in the direction I expected, but this scene alone made me not mind that they curtailed the suffering Sam was rightfully due. (SunsetXVibes)

Tall boyfriend armpit, anyone? (Monster Next Door)

The two extremes of BL in one show (Long Beans indeed).

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

[ellecdc]

i have a poly!marauders request

you know that tiktok audio

“want a beer?”

“he’s 4!”

“i don’t know what’s im supposed to with him”

imagine that with the readers younger sibling

hahaha I couldn't quite think of a fic for this but I have some opinions about it! (I love that audio though lol, I'm sure that's how my sister and brother who were 15 & 12 years old when I was born felt 😅)

James:

I saw someone argue that James would be terrible with kids because he was an only child, had no extended family near (i.e., no cousins, etc) and his parents were quite a bit older once they finally had him, meaning even his parent's friend's kids would be older than him

I disagree, actually I think this is the only take on the internet I'd make a fuss over 😅

James Potter himself is 8 years old - he has the humour of an 8 year old, he would be SO good at playing pretend, he'd have the ENERGY of an 8 year old???? He'd be SO good with kids are you kidding

the man is also so emotional and so sensitive that a kid crying over a booboo or dropping their ice cream would just get so much sympathy from him ugh I love James Potter

Sirius:

he's the only one who had a younger sibling and cousins growing up (though his cousins were older than him) so he technically has been around children

however, he didn't exactly have a happy childhood (understatement of the century), and even as kids they weren't allowed to act like kids

so I see him being enthusiastic to be around kids like "hey buddy! I love your Spiderman backpack, that's so cool!"

but the second the kids starts crying/gets upset/get's hurt he's like "oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit" and he'd be like "uhm...hey kid....uhm....stop that.. stop crying, stop - erm, do, do you like money? here, here's a five....that.. no? more? uhm, that's all the cash I got. Do you want nicotine gum? no, that's not right...hm...."

so unprepared to deal with kids if it's not all sunshine and rainbows lol

Remus:

then we have remus.....

in any of my kids fics, I have him pegged as like the BEST uncle or the most doting father

but he's the only one I could really imagine being like "erm....what....what do I do with this?"

he had to grow up SO fast after being bitten at only 4 years old. He didn't get to be a kid - he couldn't play with the village kids, he couldn't attend school before hogwarts

so...technically, I could totally see Remus being like "what am I supposed to talk to him about?" or "do i....do I take him to the pub? can four years olds even go to pubs? what do I talk about? does he now how to do his taxes???"

[talaok]

omg that dad!pedro post gave me an idea

dad!pedro and reader trying a second baby, and when they finally get pregnant they go to a check up and find out they’re having twins, and he’d be so excited 🥹

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x reader

a/n: ahhhh stop making me fantasize about having children im too young for that shit!!

You had made a pact after Emma,

One year. You were gonna wait at least one year before you'd grant her a sibling.

Now that promise... that promise hadn't exactly been kept. As it turns out, having a baby only made the both of you even more desperate for another one.

that's why when your daughter was only a few months old, with a simple "8 months is basically 12" murmured to your ear by your desperate husband, all promises went out the window.

And that's how only a month later, the pregnancy test came back positive.

You would have expected the second time to be less emotional, but god if you were wrong.

Pedro kissed you as long as he could, as long as his lungs allowed, while neverending tears of joy fell down your cheeks.

From then on Pedro had been just perfect, he had to take on a few more tasks with Emma, and he did so gladly, always with a smile on his face, always reminding you just how happy you were making him, just how you were making all his dreams come true, reminding you that he loved you more and more every day.

He was your biggest supporter, and not a day went by that he didn't make you fall in love with him all over again.

Today included. It was time for the first check-up, and you were terribly nervous.

Which meant he took his time calming you down, kissing you softly as he promised how "everything's gonna be alright" over and over again, until finally, you were in the gynecologist's office, lying on the table as the nurse performed the ultrasound.

All the while gripping Pedro's hand for dear life.

And it was then, when the nurse's movements on your belly stopped, when you watched her examine the screen more carefully, it was when she pulled away the device from your body completely, that your heart started beating out of your chest.

"what is it?" you asked, your voice trembling, already expecting the worst.

"I'm sorry, I'm not allowed to say, I'm gonna go call the doctor" the nurse, smiled, trying to be reassuring and failing miserably

"w-what do you mean you can't say? What is it? Is it bad?"

But all she could do was shake her head slightly, answering "I'll be right back, Let me go call the doctor"

The moment the door clicked behind her, the moment you were alone, tears started filling your eyes as your brain filled with images of all that was inevitably gonna happen.

"hey, hey, hey" Pedro cooed, noticing your reaction "it's ok"

"no it's not" you whimpered "There's something wrong"

"no there isn't" he promised, stroking your cheek "Nothing's wrong, I'm sure it's nothing, I'm sure she went to call the doctor so that he can tell us that we've got the most perfect baby in the word"

"Baby..." you murmured, melting into his touch "You know that's not true, I-I must have done something wrong- I-"

"don't you even think something like that sugar" he shook his head, crouching down to be at your level "You are the most amazing mother anyone could ask for, you did absolutely nothing wrong, I promise"

"I-I don't kno-"

But before you could finish the sentence, the doctor had entered, with the nurse right behind him.

"good morning, if you don't mind I would like to take a look myself"

And with a shy nod from your part, that cold instrument was on you again, while the tall, white-haired man looked attentively at the screen.

"yes" he murmured to himself "yes it seems so"

"w-what?" you couldn't stop yourself from asking, squeezing Pedro's hand tighter

"yeah, what?" he joined

"well" the man cleared his that, checking the monitor once again "the ecograph is picking up two heartbeats" 

Your heart sank, 

Your baby has two hearts? You haven't even seen that on greys anatomy

"W-what do you mean two heartbeats?"

A soft smile now ghosted his features as he saw the worry on your face "Oh sorry" he apologized "I meant to say that you're having twins"

And just like that, your heart was racing again, actually not racing, it was going as fast as the fucking speed of light.

Your hearing became muffled and your mouth fell open as you turned to your left, finding in Pedro's eyes all your surprise and excitement perfectly mirrored.

His eyes were glimmering, and his lips were turned into one of the biggest smiles you'd ever seen, the same one he had on the day he proposed, on your wedding day, the day that Emma was born, and now... now the day you found out you were gonna have two beautiful babies at once.

"w-we-" you stuttered, gripping his hand and forgetting all about the company you had in the room as you got lost in his eyes

"we're having twins" he laughed, not able to stop himself from kissing you "We're having twins" he repeated "We're having twins sweetheart" he breathed once again, looking into your eyes 

"god I love you so much"

[cjrae]

Tragedy of the Jade Nightingale. Or: My thoughts on Vol. 11 of the Apothecary Diaries.

Given that this volume just came out in English a few days ago, spoilers under the cut!

I usually think of the Apothecary Diaries volumes as pairs - usually two volumes make up an arc. If so, Volume 11 will be the first half of the arc with 12, but it also functions beautifully as a tragedy in it's own right.

** I will be only discussing information appearing officially through Vol. 11. Yes, I have read the fan translations of the web novels, but given that details can change, until it appears in official English translation, I won't yet be including it here.

The Hero

Gyoku-ou. Talk about someone who thinks he's smarter than he actually is. We knew this guy was a threat all the way back in Vol. 8, with how Gyokuyou reacted to her brother's letter and his veiled insult of sending a younger version of herself to catch either her husband's attention or the Imperial Brother's. Now we get to see him in action and he's scary - right up until he's not.

This man is charismatic as anything - he understands what makes people tick on both an individual level as well as a social level. His ability to wield a mob effectively makes him extremely dangerous, but I'm oddly put in mind of Lakan's initial impression of Fengxian. "This woman is strong, but she only knows how to fight in her own, small world."

The world Gyoku-ou inhabits is a very small, petty one. You can see it in his conspiracy theory about Jinshi's birth.

Jinshi is one of two people Gyoku-ou fails to read. When he brings Lakan and Jinshi to his puppet council to gauge support for attacking Shaoh, he thinks he's got a young malcontent in his hands, someone who wants power and is prone to the flashes of temper and insult that often drive young men. Someone who is easily manipulated. Instead, Jinshi mops the floor with him in that meeting, cutting Lakan's support out from under Gyoku-ou and making it clear that his priority is peace above war.

This doesn't take away from Gyoku-ou's political genius - this meeting teaches him that Jinshi has to be maneuvered around, rather than maneuvered directly. If the Imperial Brother doesn't want to play his part, then too bad. Gyoku-ou will see to it that Jinshi is hedged in all directions except where he wants him to go - which is to war. And even then, he's got a fight on his hands as Jinshi fully takes advantage of Empress Gyokuyou's information to undercut Gyoku-ou's support within his own family.

It's a mark of Jinshi's political skill that Gyoku-ou's move in that family council is to flirt with treason. If he can't maneuver the Imperial family through Jinshi, then he shifts tactics to turn Jinshi (and the rest of the Imperial Family) into the villain of his piece - a prince born and raised into utter depravity.

Let's just sit with what Gyoku-ou suggests to the rest of his siblings (minus the Empress) in that meeting. He implies that the Emperor impregnated his own mother in order to produce an heir. A son that he loves so dearly (and unnaturally) that he would willingly look the other way while Jinshi murders his other children in order to make sure that his brother-son-lover succeeds the throne.

This is a brilliant examination of how the bare facts of the situation can be construed by people with very different motivations to fit whatever worldview is most convenient for them. I'm a fan of the palace politics in this series because they feel very real.

Gyoku-ou doesn't lie once. But boy does he create a narrative that suits his purposes and dares anyone (namely Rikuson) to tell Jinshi. He is escalating the situation and he's doing it fast, while also challenging the legitimacy of the Imperial Family. A fact which, if it does get back to Jinshi (or the Emperor), could get the entire new You Clan wiped out just as fast as the Yi Clan was. This scene functions as a microcosm of Gyoku-ou's two fundamental character flaws; his short term thinking and his utter self-absorption.

Becoming The Wind

Since Rikuson was introduced in Vol. 5, he's been a mirror for Jinshi. He's a "pretty boy," calm under pressure, fundamentally kind and decent to other people while also being extremely competent at his job. Unlike Jinshi, he's also a bit older and more mature. He also clearly admires Maomao and sees the qualities that make her exceptional, despite her various masks.

As it turns out, Rikuson mirrors Jinshi in another important sense too - he also has a secret identity. The Yi Clan were the de facto royalty of the Western Capital and Rikuson is one of the direct survivors of the clan. He was never in the line of succession given the Yi Clan's matrilineal structure. But they were quick enough to save some of the children, namely Rikuson and Empress Gyokuyou's three ladies in waiting, Haku'u, Koku'u and Seki'u.

Rikuson, who was Gyoku-ou's excuse to trick His Former Majesty into giving him the authorization to destroy the Yi Clan. Rather than truly being an bastard Imperial prince, he's a young pawn in Gyoku-ou's hands to whip up an armed mob to hunt Rikuson down - and his mother and sister give their lives to ensure his survival - not for vengeance, but so that the Yi Clan's mission of protecting the west will live on even if the named clan itself dies. So, like Jinshi, he is dedicated to the welfare of the people above all else.

The trouble with relying on an unruly mob is that it's sloppy. Gyoku-ou left multiple survivors and they have absolutely no love for him. He's left weapons at his back.

Rikuson is the other person Gyoku-ou utterly fails to read. He spends well over a year back in his homeland, working for Gyoku-ou as an aide ostensibly from the central region, patiently waiting for an opening - even as Gyoku-ou, who knows that Rikuson has to be assigned to the west with some kind of ulterior motive, is so blind that he thinks he must be a secret member of the La Clan, rather than the Yi boy he tried to kill seventeen years earlier.

Rikuson represents the culmination Gyoku-ou's short term thinking in that he doesn't bother to think about the threat of any surviving Yi clan might pose to him.

He will not insult his mother's memory, or his sister's. But if his mission of protecting the west coincides with vengeance for his family? Sure enough, Gyoku-ou's insistence on going to war (and dragging the Imperial family's legitimacy into his motivations) gives Rikuson his opening; especially because he isn't a vigilante.

He is acting under orders.

The New You

Rikuson's point about Gyoku-ou's life being a tragedy hits home when you consider Gyokuyou's thoughts of how she knows her father loves her - but would also abandon her in a heartbeat if she is no longer valuable to him. Unlike her older brother, she has a very clear-eyed view of how their father operates and focuses on making sure that her value never drops in his eyes.

Gyoku-ou's value to Gyoku'en plummeted the day he destroyed the Yi Clan - Gyoku'en's family. He was given a second chance to show that he could still perform the single function of the men of the Yi Clan - to protect the west. When he endangered it instead, Gyoku'en sent the weapon he'd spent seventeen years preparing (Rikuson) with an execution order.

By first destroying the Yi Clan and then following it up with a proposed invasion of Shaoh, Gyoku-ou proved to Gyoku'en that he was no son of his. Given how desperate he was to be his father's son, this whole book is a tragedy in the classic sense. The Jade Nightingale was so desperate to reinvent himself as a Jade Eagle that he destroyed himself in pursuit of the one thing he never lost - his father's love. But, to be his father's heir, what he needed was Gyoku'en's trust and respect, not his love.

And he killed that seventeen years ago along with the Yi Clan.

Ironically, the foreign born girl that he despised and attempted to undermine at every opportunity, emerges as their father's true heir and mother of the nation, with the rest of the surviving Yi clan as part of her loyal retinue.

In her triumph, the Yi Clan is reborn as the You Clan as Gyoku'en, a Yi man, is given a clan name on the strength of Gyokuyou's role as Empress. So much of their history has been lost, down to the matrilineal succession and family records, but their mission lives on through the Yi men who will continue to protect the west, no matter the personal cost to themselves. There is no room for self-absorption here, therefore Gyoku-ou has no place in their new clan.

Also, a parallel to pay attention to is how the destruction of the Yi Clan and the Shi Clan are mirroring each other with the children being saved. The Yi Clan is reborn with a new name, which leads one to wonder what the consequences of saving those Shi children will be long term.

A Dagger In The Dark

Gyoku-ou sucks up a lot of air in Vol. 11 because he is driving the action - Jinshi, Maomao and their party are all stuck reacting to him, except for one character; Chue.

We see Chue attach herself to Maomao starting with the ship and it's not difficult to guess that just as Lihaku is serving as a discreet bodyguard for Maomao on Jinshi's orders, Chue is also there as protection. Chue doesn't try to conceal that she is clearly trained in espionage either.

Rikuson's proposal to Maomao is not a serious bid for her hand, but nor is it a joke - it's a message to Chue that Jinshi needs to tighten security around Maomao. As he puts it, he knows the "hyper protective" elements around her will close ranks. Because he's foreseen a strategy that may not have yet occurred to Gyoku-ou (who tends not to pay attention to the bit parts of the play), but if it does would almost certainly push the country into war.

Maomao is the lever that could move both Lakan and Jinshi.

All he has to do is kill her and make it look like a foreign attack. Lakan's instinctive ability to read a situation and Jinshi's formidable investigative skills would likely be dulled in the face of their rage and grief. Especially since they are technically Gyoku-ou's guests and don't have freedom of movement to push the issue.

Rikuson seizes his opportunity before Gyoku-ou can continue to escalate, but he realizes quickly that Chue arranged the stage and was there as both spy and backup assassin. (I think it's safe to say that Gyoku-ou's conspiracy theory AND that Yi family ledger will be reported, given that we know there were ladies-in-waiting at the meeting and that's how Chue was disguised - and she didn't actually promise to dispose of it).

Gyoku-ou doesn't bother to think that while the Emperor may be far away and the Imperial Brother is a manageable threat, that the people surrounding Jinshi may not be bound by his strictures. Hence, Chue was on standby. No matter what, Gyoku-ou was never going to make it to that ritual. He was never smart enough to realize that his crossing the line would be never be forgiven.

While Jinshi would order an execution if necessary (and has in the past), he would never order an assassination. Therefore, it's evident that Chue reports to someone else. Who that someone is, we don't know, but there's only one person further up the Imperial tree than Jinshi, so it would be reasonable for Rikuson to assume that the Emperor has placed additional protection around not just Jinshi, but Maomao.

Exclusive: Baby Swap!

Jinshi's birth is not a secret to the audience and while Maomao doesn't have confirmation, she's pretty certain of her suspicion. This volume made it patently obvious that there are others out there who are perfectly capable of putting the pieces together, even if the details are twisted.

Let's return to Gyoku-ou's conspiracy theory.

He's put together all the correct pieces. The Emperor's attitude toward Jinshi makes no sense in a traditional palace setting - a much younger, handsome, charismatic and competent brother? That's a threat to the Emperor and his direct line. But Jinshi is never treated that way - instead he's indulged on many fronts.

He's allowed to duck most of his official duties as Ka Zuigetsu (except for a few he can't, where he appears masked).

He's allowed to pretend to be a eunuch for six years and run the Rear Palace.

When he finally reveals himself to the court to put down the Shi Rebellion, he's described as "hale" and "just as proficient in the military arts as the administrative." (More proof that Jinshi is NOT the best judge of his own abilities). He emerges fully formed into court politics - a perfectly trained Crown Prince - only to have a newborn given the title instead.

Gyoku-ou deliberately put the worst possible spin on these facts. I suspect the rest of the You siblings are going to keep their mouths shut about Gyoku-ou's ugly theory, but if he could think of it, if Maomao could think of it with just seeing Jinshi standing next to Lady Ah-Duo, then so can others.

Maomao can be mad about Jinshi branding himself all she wants, but it's currently looking like an absolutely BRILLIANT move on Jinshi's part. Whatever doubts Gyoku-ou managed to plant about Jinshi and the Emperor's motives with the rest of the You clan siblings, Empress Gyokuyou is not likely to entertain it.

Also, it got the Emperor to essentially "banish" Jinshi to the edges of the Empire shortly after his new Crown Prince was born, which makes it look to other members of the court like the Emperor is taking steps to rein in his younger brother and balances the factions that have to be forming back in the capital.

This is not a secret that can be kept forever. No matter how careful Ah-Duo and Anshi were, the information is starting to leak out around the edges, as we see that the Empress' ladies in waiting that were dismissed clearly had eyes and ears - and in at least one case, a loose tongue.

The next arc is being seeded and Jinshi is inching closer and closer to that throne. He ran the Rear Palace for years (essentially managing the nation in microcosm) and as of the end of Vol. 11, he's now stepping up to govern a province and gain actual ruling experience while also having suppressed a war.

I've said before that Jinshi ascending the throne is the bad ending - if there is a single person who is more trapped by the palace than the prince, it's the emperor. We'll see what happens!

[dontforgetukraine]

Nestor Bilous was born in 1889 in the village of Lebiazhe, Kharkiv region. He completed three grades of the church-parish school and participated in World War I. He began keeping a diary in 1911, but his most detailed entries describe the beginning of the Civil War, the mass man-made famine of 1921-1923, and the Holodomor of 1932-1933. Bilous essentially became a chronicler of the Soviet government’s destruction of Ukrainian villages. In 1937, Nestor Bilous,who was then the manager of the collective farm “Chervonyi Kolos,” was arrested by the NKVD for “discontent with party policies.” During the search, the NKVD confiscated a notebook with his notes, that became the main evidence of his “counter-revolutionary activities.” Bilous spent six years in forced labour camps and only returned home a year after Stalin’s death. Here are just a few entries from his diary: —Holodomor Museum

---

April 30, 1933 It rains often, and it’s cold. Sowing is progressing very poorly because there is no grain, no horses, and even if someone has a horse, it’s too weak to work a full day in the field. So, this year there will be even less sown. People are constantly dying, and they bury six in one grave because there’s no one to dig individual graves. On April 27, Mykola Fedorovych Butenko died, a young man, 22 years old, a real guard, tall and handsome. He had to die of starvation just because the village council didn’t give him a certificate, as the son of a dekulakized father. Without it, no one would hire him. And in the spring, when he was already too weak, there was work, but he couldn’t do it, and he died of starvation.

---

May 13, 1933 The warm weather started on May 8, and all the crops are sprouting. Beetroot and seedlings are being eaten by beetles and fleas. We need rain, but there isn't any. The collective farms keep sowing; they will probably be sowing until St. Peter's Day. People are still dying of hunger. On May 12,Paraska Chorna,an activist and party candidate,died of famine. When people were being sold out for not meeting the grain requisition quotas, she danced in the school out of joy in the evening,and now she has died of hunger, like a dog.

---

May 20, 1933 Every day, people die of famine. The village council has appointed a sanitary commission to collect the bodies and bury them because there is no one to do the burials. Now, the village council drives people out to dig a large grave for about ten people, and then they bury them. Many adults and children, and when you look at them, they are living corpses.

---

Since the beginning of the invasion of 2022, Bilous' native village Lebiazhe was in the grey zone for a long time, suffering from Russian shelling. The crimes continue... —Holodomor Museum

[vampyrial]

A World For Her Alone | Born of Love

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18

cw (chapter specific): threats of violence, assault, parents talking horribly about their children

summary: Mothers of us, be kind to the fathers on whom we rely.

word count: 4.0k

Claude watched your mother fall to the floor but threw himself down with her all the same. He gripped her by her shoulders, as though the truth he had scoured this house for was only awaiting his anger to draw back from the void as her life slipped away. He called into the hall for help but he sounded not frightened or even desperate but commanding, like his superiors. Like the men who trained him when he was just a child, trying to wield more from his pathetic body than he was willing to give. He knelt on the floor with your mother’s body as she gurgled blood and his grasp never faltered. He looked into the dark, waning pits of her eyes and tried to conjure the answers she’d die with.

Like everything, it was no use.

Your father, having stumbled upon a baffling scene that should have tried the endless patience he held for the lord, still questioned Claude with a gentleness that sickened him. “Was there anything unusual before this?” Your mother lay, already dead, in her bed with the two of them standing at the foot of it. And though he hated your mother with a fervor that begged him to crush her bones under his heel, what angered him more was the fact that the reverence had not ended when he had every reason to believe that Claude had a hand in his wife’s death. The falseness of all of it threatened to overwhelm him.

He allowed it.

He grabbed your father by the collar of his shirt, the man’s body even neglected to flinch immediately, he was that far removed from the harm Claude could do. “Unusual is the entirety of this farce.”

“My Lord–” Your father began, fear only just beginning to darken the edges of his eyes.

“You will tell me what you know of a certain princess and knight I read about in a frivolous story sitting on your shelf.” Claude’s grip did not relax, he flexed his fingers, yearning to curl them around your father’s neck.

Your father’s face betrayed an instant recognition but he held himself aloft from it. “Lord Claude, we all act impulsively when life challenges us this way but let you not sully your own reputation with violence against your family.”

A frenzied and crazed laugh slipped from Claude’s lips and he bared his teeth in some odd approximation of a grin. He could not believe the audacity of it. He was so tired of normal. So sick of it that he could let himself die right then. Still, he pressed on, willing the information from your father’s body as he had done to prisoners before. “Diana’s mother. Who is she?” Your father’s eyes went flat as though he’d recoiled in on himself for protection, already having decided defending himself was not an option. “That…why do you wish to know?” He had stopped pretending there was nothing to know.

“Does she hold it over you, father-in-law?” Claude sneered. “Does Diana use her magic to keep you in her thrall?”

A spark of something ignited and your father was dragged back from the depths of memory. “Diana uses nothing, know of nothing, my lord. Is that truly not apparent to you?” He wrenched himself from Claude’s grip suddenly, holding out his arms in a gesture that signified that he’d tread carefully. Claude allowed him to step back, believing his explanation to follow. “Can you not see her perfect innocence in this? She is above the madness she was born amidst.”

Claude had given him every chance to speak sense, the tips of his fingers were growing cold and numb. The acrid stench of her blood on his clothes and his hands grew difficult to even breathe through, it was everywhere, traces of blood were everywhere in this house. And still he might add more. He unsheathed his sword partially from his belt to which your father did not flinch. “My Lord, I need only know what becomes of Diana, what of her and your child if you act this way.”

What becomes of them? Claude laughed again, the world ebbing with flashes of blurred daylight as he felt himself descend with each gasped breath. He was greeting the pits of madness, he could feel it. Reality was disintegrating again. “I’ll leave here and kill them both now if I don’t have my answers.”

Your father’s expression turned to shock, as though he believed…as though he truly believed in what was sold to him by a self which had retreated. Claude— not the one with a grotesque and near calculable perfection in his single-mindedness, but the one who had been buried underneath, was the only thing left behind to speak but your father did not know him. He could not comprehend that there had ever been a part of him that could not only feel apathy toward Diana but one which could actively hated her. Claude thought placidly that he was soon to sink, collapsed under the weight of this dichotomy and the madness it inspired. “Diana’s mother, the princess.” Your father stared with a sort of wonder into Claude’s eyes, trying to weigh how to proceed in a conversation with a once tamed and now feral animal. “She is gone now, you must have heard it even if before you did not know her significance.”

Somewhere in his memory, he felt around for a name he’d heard but it was difficult, for all of time and thought revolved around this agony. And reality had scarcely moved with the stability it had before, it bisected so that he was of two minds and of two lives at once. Still, he managed to draw a whisper from the depths of his lives. A princess of Siodonna who had been her elder sister’s heir, had succumbed to an unknown illness. The kingdom’s future was uncertain and as his father-in-law and his country at large had ties to them, it had been their concern too. That princess, the immaterial one who had no face and name in face of the consuming thing thoroughly within and without his mind. Nothing had any definition that was not given by Diana’s gaze and Diana treated your mother as her own, the only mother she would ever know. He’d had no reason to care. “She was a mage? She crafted this…” He realized he didn’t know how to describe what it was he was afflicted by. Especially to someone like your father, who seemed like he’d have willingly given in to a life of toil for Diana’s love were he in Claude’s place. “This life.”

“I know little of her work, or I– I knew little. She cast some spell on our princess, perhaps it is so that she gave her this life with you.” Your father compulsively smoothed his clothes out, rearranging himself where Claude had disheveled his neat appearance. “If it is true then…forgive me, Lord Claude but I do not see it as a bad thing. I can’t understand why you would. Is it not a good thing?” He smoothed the lapels of his shirt with a quivering smile. “Something was given to you, Lord Claude, by ordinance of magic that is so very rare in this world. Should you not treasure it?”

Claude could have lunged for him again. Instead, though, he drew his sword in warning. Your father, undeterred, only smiled. “My Lord…No matter what, Diana is a gift to you, whether the princess’ or god’s. Why do you only pretend to scorn her now? Is it out of guilt for her elder sister? She made her own bed, she made it easy for fate to find its way between you. In your love with Diana, she was just happenstance, don’t you think? Wasn’t it always going to be that you two would find a way?”

Another frisson of light and reality rearranged again. Claude was kneeling on your father’s chest with one hand around the man’s throat and the other holding his sword above the man’s head as though he were keen to put it right through his eye.

“My Lord, what is going on?” Felix appeared in the doorway, a hand on his sword which stayed sheathed despite Claude obviously meaning to hurt your father. His voice didn’t sound panicked as it should, he sounded truly conflicted. His eyes flitted from him to your father again and again, his gaze tense but tinged in something akin to…amusement. Yes, it would make sense that he’d be amused by. If Felix hated Claude then he must surely had a father who’d been treating you poorly far before. Perhaps he was debating letting both of them kill each other.

“You may go,” your father replied, placidly. He was panting and clearly a bit afraid but he spoke calmly. “Do not intrude on us, Lord Claude and I were caught in a misunderstanding.”

Felix raised an eyebrow but did not disobey, turning on his heels and closing the door behind him with a click, his pride as a knight long forgotten. Claude would have killed him without a second thought had anything interrupted them, he was tied to a singular desire that was the only thing holding him to earth. Whether it be your father, your knight or his very own child, he’d not let anything stop him. If he did, this life would yet again be nothing but wasted time and wasted agony. He looked down at your father. “I don’t care at all if your mother was a brazen courtesan who let your father knock you about like a disobedient dog if it meant that she could let other men fuck her for position. I don’t care if you feel nothing when you see your wife cold and dead. The cruelty you visit upon your first daughter, that will be repaid. I will see it repaid.” The voice that came out of him was guttural like the call of animal. “But not before I know who put this story to paper. You say you know little of her work but it seems that someone must. Who are they?”

“Lord Claude, pardon me, but if you could find someone to give you what answers you wish to hear…what would it change?” He huffed, struggling to breath under Claude’s weight. “She was never my daughter, that girl. I never felt like her father, she…she was more omen than a child. She was born from me and the misery ever above me. I don’t know who she most took after. If you believe there was a spell that compelled you toward my little princess, then it must have been intended as a blessing for you as much as her. There’s no reason for lies, My Lord, there’s no one here to pity anymore. You could never have loved that girl, it might have been enough for her just to do her duties to you but she was so vicious, so hateful. She has never been innocent a day in her life, always had to be reminded of herself. It would have compounded your misery, that I know, Lord Claude. Believe that I know my own blood even if she has never been held in my arms as a daughter.”

A punch landed on your father’s nose, Claude could feel a part of the bone split. He wished for his gauntlet, wished for the pleasure and ease of watching your father’s face turn into a grotesque portrait of his own viciousness in moments. “I’m not you.” The words came out in a rhythm, like the warning song of a bird of prey.

Your father, with blood all over his face and still gushing from his nose, smiled and revealed the blood on his teeth as well. He was fully crying then, gasping little breaths and squeezing his eyes shut. “No…you’re not me. You have had a fate…that I…might have died for.”

“I will have my way. I must have my way. If not, I will take from you the last shred of that princess you so loved. I will kill them both.” Your father’s eyes popped open, red with blood and terrified. This time, he had no reason to believed that Claude could be swayed from the boundary of anger and a will to see bloodshed done. He took a long and trembling breath in through his mouth, madness defeated under the weigh of Claude’s own. “I saw the book long ago, I’d heard…whispers about it. I bought it from…a common woman’s bookstore, the author called himself…Lucas, I wanted to know…who could know our story so intimately and who could dare publish it but I…I went to where the woman said he’d last lived and he was not there, in fact…it looked like no one had lived there in some time.”

“Where?”

“Right here in this county, I could not believe…across the road from where that shabby little theater is.”

A noise sounded at the door a woman’s voice muffled, sounding pleading against the voice of Felix, giving her what sounded like short and rather curt answers. Your father’s head whipped toward the noise and for the first time, he struggled underneath Claude. “My Lord, I ask that you not let my daughter see this. Whatever you feel for her, she has done nothing wrong.” Claude hesitantly climbed off of him, having gained the answers he’d sought. It had little to do with sparing Diana and more to do with the fact that he could move forward, finally. Claude swung open the door and barged past both Felix and his frantic wife with their daughter in tow, sucking at her thumb. He might not have even noticed there was still blood on his hands if he did not see it in he way their expressions mirrored each other as he walked past. Though their daughter took after Diana most in the first place, fear made them doppelgangers, the sight of him rid his wife’s face of the mature and practiced expression she wore. She looked as young as when they first met.

He pushed past.

“Claude! Oh my god, are you hurt?” She followed after him, letting go of her daughter’s hand trying to stop him from proceeding. “What happened?” She stood in front of him. “Where are you going.

“I’m leaving.” He started to walk around her but Diana put her arms out, moving with him.

“Don’t,” He warned. It was a bit laughable that she was using her body as a shield to keep him from walking away because she presumed he’d not harm her to pass. All the while, the harm he did to her would be negligible in his mind, one drop of her fair, precious blood in a sea of viscera.

“Don’t what? Don’t stop you from leaving when you’re covered in blood?” She cried. “What is wrong with you? Talk to me, please. They’re saying my mother is dead and you…you were there with her. No one will tell me what’s going on.”

“Yes, I was there.” He affirmed easily. A little smile rose at the corners of his lips. “Forgive me, I should be the one to tell you what has been going on.”

She was not soothed but she relaxed somewhat, her gaze growing expectant. She reached out for his arm, perhaps trying to console whatever it was she saw in his expression and the blood drying on his clothes. He took her by the shoulders instead, unable to keep his grip gentle when he had the object of so many miseries between his fingers. His daughter called for him but her voice had simply become part of the chorus of little voices lost to deaths behind him. He did not know her voice from the ones he dreamed of, the voice of the colicky little infant he’d left behind. “Everything in this house has always been for your sake, Diana. Everyone has lived just to give you more but no one paid the price like your sister did. Did you not see that? Or perhaps did you think it was her duty, to be expected that she should survive off of scraps just so that you could have more.”

Diana’s brow furrowed, she did not look nearly as afraid of him as she should have been. She did not approach him with nearly as much caution. “What?”

“Your mother devoted her life to caring for you. Promised to you. Your father holds you like a relic of the past, a keepsake of your mother. But while we’re at it, let’s speak of your mother. They never spoke to you about her, did they? I’ll be the one who does, after all, I am your savior. It is the least I can do.” He stared down at her. “Your mother was poisoning you to keep you inside the house, safe and sound. Did you know? No, of course not, this woman was a slave to your care. What could you think to do other than swallow up her lies?”

“Poisoning me? Claude, you’re not making sense, you’re hurting me.”

“Everything does,” He said simply. “Everything hurts you. Save for the pleasure of your actions. The fallout hurts you, the secret hurts you but never the act. Only how it looks. Did you ever consider your own sister when you spent your days throwing yourself at me?” It wasn’t fair to speak to her of these things as though he had no part in it but what had ever been fair about any of his lives? She could shoulder her share of it. He’d make her. “If it were her, you’d have never forgotten but that’s the point, isn’t it? It’s you so it’s acceptable, you, the poor, sick little darling. Maybe you felt like you deserved it even if you felt a bit sorry, you always came back to that fact. Your mother gave you the chance to excuse yourself this way, maybe you’d have been glad all along to know what she was doing. Maybe it would give you reason to be saved, reason greater than your sister’s.”

Your father came out of the room, blotting his nose with a soaked handkerchief. Diana looked over Claude’s shoulder in horror, letting out a gasp. “Lord Claude. Please. Leave her be.” He was swaying on his feet a bit but Felix did not offer his arm.

Claude paid him no mind. “Your mother was a mage, beloved by your miserable father. I read it in your mother’s diary, it’s still in her room if you wish to read every word your mother inspired. She put a spell on you but your magic was also great, did you know that? Or did you cast this spell on me by sheer will?” He paused, waiting to hear her answer, as though she would give one. He had not realized until then that he wanted her to. He wanted her to have known.

“Let go of me! Don’t do this in front of your daughter, you’re frightening her!”

His fingers flexed, grasping her tighter. “Tell me. Is this love the doing of all that wasted magic buried in a weak body?”

“I truly don’t know what you’re talking about, Claude, please. I love you.” She pleaded, teary eyed. Her tears…for some reason inspired a burning hatred, one that was painful to hold. Tears. She hadn’t earned the right to tears, not for you and certainly not for herself. Their daughter had begun to cry, mirroring her mother. Diana gently called to the girl, trying to calm her while terrified herself. The crying of their child brought him back, reality merged again and he was hearing the cries from a cradle rocked by the wind, this time the hollow between her screams filled by the comfort of a mother she did not have. It enraged him.

“I don’t love you, Diana. More than that, I hate you. More than I ever thought one could hate. This feeling, the misery of laying with you knowing that you reek of the deaths that follow after you…I’d rather kill myself than bear it even once more. You sicken me and I sicken myself for having ever…fallen into you like this.” It came out in a desperate tone, a breathless ramble. “The child with my blood might as well have been born only of you for how little I feel for it. Her birth brought me no joy, because every time I look at her, I think of the child that your sister might have had with me. I love your sister. I love her down to her bones, down to the hollow space in my life that she’s left. You have…again you have stolen it…”

Belatedly, caution entered her gaze. “Claude…” her voice broke. “You don’t mean any of this. You’re ill. You’ve made yourself ill. You need rest.”

He laughed humorlessly. “I’ve never meant anything I’ve said to you until now. You think this is madness and maybe it is! But that doesn’t mean it isn’t me.” He let go of her. “All of it is falsehood and you know it. It was falsehood that benefitted you so you could live with it well enough but no more. I cannot live this way.” He forced himself to leave the anger there, it was of no consequence now, his anger did nothing to save you and was becoming rather indulgent. Only his next pursuit could provide any hope of helping you. And he’d not be tempted from that path for a belated revenge.

Diana went to their daughter and held her, tucking the girl’s teary face into her shoulder as Claude pressed forward, walking down the hall. Your father came over to comfort the two, setting a hand on her shoulder and murmuring assurances which she ignored. “Where do you intend to run?" Diana, who simply could not leave things be called out to him. “Your home is here, your family is here. Whatever you feel now for me…I truly don’t understand what you feel you’ve discovered here but I know that you have always had your regrets and I’m sorry for that. I always sought to be happy with you. But even if I have failed, it isn’t for you to abandon us now of all times. I didn’t kill my sister, I didn’t make her run away. I’m now without my mother and without my sister and you would have me lose you?” She rose to her feet, cautiously, the only sound in the hall being their daughter’s sniffling and the swish of her silk skirts. “Stay. Let a doctor see you.”

Claude looked back at her for a moment. Diana’s gaze held his with fragile hope. She was beautiful in the dull, grey light from the window. Her tears glittered on her cheeks, her white dress was smeared with her father’s blood. It reminded him of you. How many lives you’d spent kneeling at the altar of his sins, waiting for him and still waiting at the end. The innocence of your disbelief worn on your sleeve.

But on Diana, such a look was a profoundly cruel farce. A reminder of just how unearned the tragedy in her eyes was. He felt glad to leave her. He hoped that just once, she’d be made to wait for a husband who would not come, to cling to a promise she knew was already broken, even if in the end he knew it would not matter. Memory is what makes tragedy. For all that happened, the agony is in remembering.

“You’ve never been a wife to me, this has never been a family,” He said it softly, not for her benefit, but because he felt reality begin to waver and his mind become such a fragile and uncertain place. “You have always felt like a trial from god and that child…a shadow of something long gone born only to compound my misery. All of this to punish me.”

Reality melted again, reformed around a memory of you begging him not to leave without you. He knew it wasn't real and still it had been hard to make his way out into the dark without turning back.

tags: @kage-tobiuo @kreishin @rosephantomhive @yeahdrarry @splaterparty0-0 @dear-dairiess @qluvrv @hafsuhhh @eissaaaa @ayolk @doan-19 @fourcefulcupid @ariachaos @cerisearan @irisspade @yaesflorist @jcrml @xiaosprettygf @yevenly @amaris08atoshi012022 @obsessed-with-a-fictional-man @softbummiee @cassanderasblog @waka-babe @bananatwirl@s1mp69 @mitsuyamistress @hottiewifeyyyy @reiko69 @syyyy4ever @pinkpastel-l @dododododooosworld @gwyneveire @mvoonxlightv @noisyenthusiastface @coldpeachkitten @brightykitten @worstliving @kailyan

[child-of-the-danube]

MASSIVE AGATHA ALL ALONG SPOILERS SO SKIP IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE EPISODE

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Time to yap, my sisters in the craft 🔮🧙🏻‍♀️

Positives of the final two episodes:

1. Jen finally being free

2. Agatha showing she actually learned from her coven in her final battle with Rio - she used Alice's protection spell, Jen's moon water spell and listened to Lilia's advice about hitting the deck

3. The parallels of Agatha and her coven:

- She was in the same situation as Lorna. A mother who knew her child was doomed from the start and did everything in her power to protect them and keep them alive for as long as she could, only for it to be fruitless in the end. And despite it being fruitless, the children did feel the love and were aware of the sacrifice, and sometimes that is enough. Alice and Nicky's memory will forever live through the songs their mothers made for and with them. The memory of their love outlived both them and their children and will keep on living on for long after.

- She chose to give her life for someone she just met but clearly felt strongly for the same way Lilia did. A lifetime of running from Death. A lifetime of collecting knowlegde for it to appear useless. A lifetime of seeing Death everywhere, of being persued by her, of being lonely and heartbroken with grief. And then going out by embracing Death by your own will to give another a chance and do at least once what you failed to do for centuries - protect.

- Her and Billy making a story come to life out of love and grief for their family. She set the foundation and he made it come to realisation. Both took away from others but only one gets be exempt from the consequences and able to achieve what they were after from the start.

4. Agatha being the happiest she's ever been when Nicky was with her

5. The acceptance in her voice when she says "Sometimes...boys die"

6. The fact that the dandelion seed in Nicky's hair that she kept for centuries saved her in the final trial oh my god 😭 😭

7. Agatha's love for Nicky being so strong that a silly little song they made together became world known. "You...I made from scratch" AAAAAAAAAAAAA

8. She calls her power "my purple" cause Nicky called it so 💔💔

9. THE KISS

10. Showing that it was Agatha's desire to keep Nicky alive and later on when he died her grief turning her to addiction that caused her to become this famous witch killer. She was never purely evil. What she did was, and it is not an excuse, but still. The parallels between her and Wanda being ready to destroy entire worlds and lives just to get their children back... A mother's love can make whole valleys bloom but it can also make mountains crumble to dust and my heart is not ok

11. Agatha doing for Billy what she couldn't do for her own son. Giving him a chance to live

12. Ghost Agatha's first move being annoying her adoptive son lmao

13. The road's entrance becoming a memorial to Sharon, Alice and Lilia

14. Billy getting the wake up call that he is not so different from Agatha or Wanda. His grief created a literal death trap and consequently killed Sharon, Alice and Lilia, even if Agatha is telling him Alice was her doing and Lilia was by her own choice

15. Agatha finding her purpose as a mentor in death

Negatives:

1. We were cheated out of a proper Agatha and Rio backstory. How did they meet? How did they fall in love? What happened in the centuries between Nicky's death and entering the road? How often did Rio come to Agatha for Agatha to be so clear about the one thing she wants when she passes being not seeing Rio? She is Death's only exception, only love, only scar. WE DESERVED MORE!!! How did Agatha bag a literal god????

2. Once again, a story that started out and was marketed as a story of women ends up being just means to help a man's story build up. I mean, I should have expected that but still leaves a bitter taste. Wiccan is an interesting character but I feel cheated out of knowing more about Jen. I wanted her backstory before being bound. I wanted Agatha pre-Salem trial and post Nicky's death for more than a power draining sequence through the ages. I wanted Agatha and Rio developing this bond that held up for 300 years. I wanted the Salem Seven to be more than a 5 second threat. Billy will get his own show anyway, like come on.

3. In connection to that, I know this one is a very subjective sentiment and I understand completely but it still pisses me off to no end. The fact that these witches, these centuries old women, who all had being covenless, lonely and in dire situations with their powers in common, went on this death wish trip with someone they didn't like at all as a last resort and got what they were lacking, learned to care for eachother, got their powers back, and that Agatha had the possibility to finally have a family and people genuinely care for her, turned out to be practically worthless in the end cause they had like 5mins of it is making me go insane. Alice said it best: "This is it? I was finally able to do something with my life and this is all the time I get?". The only one, aside Jen, coming out alive and having time to bask in the glow of his new-found power AND have the chance to do something with it is a fucking teenage boy who already got the privilege of cheating Death and the privilege of his family members still be somewhere out in reach to search for. The finale said "your life, struggles and resolution were just means to get someone else ahead". Call me a misandrist, so be it, but I'm fucking tired. Is one story where women are the focus and have a happy ending so fucking much to ask for????

4. THE KISS cause at what cost??? I repeat, this was the fastest, literal, bury your gays move I've ever seen. We knew it couldn't possibly end well, but damn. However, kudos to Kathryn and Aubrey making it so hungry and desperate, but also soft and real and full of emotion.

5. Billy being a dick and wanting to send Agatha back to "Rio's toxic embrace" like he didn't just watch her give up her life for him and tell her that she's "not that bad". My boy, you are truly strange in your holier than thou attitude sometimes

[transtravisstoll]

Batkids Age Reversal List

want to do a age reversal AU for the batkids but why do the comics keep fucking up their ages this has taken me weeks of trying to figure out i’m gonna off the DC comic writers. if you have any better ideas for their ages pls let me know im going to gouge my eyes out if i have to do any more math.

alfred: ???

-immortal. fuck you. he looked death in the face and told him to stop tracking mud all over his freshly mopped floors and that dinner was at eight.

bruce: 39

-had damian at eighteen bc i wanted it to be as close to his age gap with dick in canon as possible but i am not having this man fathering a child at 15

damian: 21

-came to gotham at age 8, refused to be a normal kid bc he was literally raised an assassin and bruce doesn’t know how to encourage nonviolent activities in children so letting him fight crime seemed… better than being an assassin. he, at the age of eight, could not come up with a name that wasn’t fucking Terrifying so whenever gordon asked for his “little shadow”‘s name they were suspiciously silent bc no, damian, you can not call yourself Vengeance or Malice. the media called him shadow and it stuck.

duke: 18

-wanted to keep his age gap with tim similar, but with duke being the older one, instead of doing dick and jason’s age gap bc it makes more sense this way.

-his parents got jokerified when he was 12, and so did a Lot of people in the Narrows. it absolutely decimated their little community so duke became signal. he didn’t fight crime, he gave back to his community, he helped with the cleanup. bruce ended up basically kidnapping the poor kid. (duke ran away from his foster home because he wasn’t a glorified babysitter or maid, fuck you, he can crash on couches.)

STEPH: 16

-again, wanted to keep the age gap between steph and tim the same but keeping steph the older one. makes more sense this way!! leave me alone.

-became spoiler at 13, was only spoiler for a year before she became shadow at 14 for about six months in between damian and jason. there was a six month period as well where bruce didn’t have a shadow and alfred literally had to bribe steph to be shadow bc he wasn’t abt to let a kid run around the gotham night without knowing batman was two steps ahead of them. plus, having a kid with him made bruce more cautious.

TIM: 15

-FINALLY got to mimicking the age gap between dick and jason in canon

-never becomes shadow, actually, he takes bab’s spot as their computer wiz. doesn’t call himself oracle though because he fucking sucks at making names. calls himself override (barf).

-also, steph is the only one who hes told he’s override to and also knows the batfam’s identities

-duke knows tim is override bc he’s scary like that!! tim doesn’t know duke knows he’s override, but duke knows that tim knows their identities and tim Also doesn’t know that. duke is fr terrifying. love him.

-tim figured out the batfam because of duke’s meta abilities bc he’s also scary like that

Jason: 14

-oh, he’s… currently out of commission. became shadow at 12.

-didn’t die in ethiopia, because fuck that plot. he was doing a stakeout but the joker had kidnapped this itty little baby (an eight year old boy) who he found running around the gotham night. jason went out of commission saving that little boy. what does out of commission mean? who knows. could be dead. could be severely injured. kidnapped. the possibilities are endless.

-i think it’s fucked that the comic fans voted for a fifteen year old to die by the joker. y’all are crazy.

cass: 13

-mimicking jason and cass’ age gap with cass being younger bc it makes more sense leave me alone

-isn’t a Batman approved shadow (yet) but she shadows batman anyways after jason’s… indisposed. the bonus is that batman doesn’t Know he has a shadow but gotham is kept in the dark abt shadow being (redacted) because cass and jason had the same exact fucking build, okay, jason hasn’t gotten his growth spurt yet (because of childhood malnutrition) . weird how batman lost weight though, after he went on that rage incident after the latest arrest of the joker. he’s leaner now. (is it the same batman? who knows.)

dick: 8

-mimicking the tim and damian age gap, bc it’s six years in my head leave me alone.

-huh, jason went out of commission saving an eight year old and dick is eight… suspicious. coincidence? hm.

babs: 7

-mimicking the babs and dick age gap but with babs being younger bc i think she’s older in canon? unsure. DC please i’m going to kill you and then me.