#this was pretentious af

[kkochang]

I just know that bradley's order is something like "grande ice matcha latte with a shot of espresso, one pump of vanilla and oat milk" and max definitely asks to try it each time even though he knows he won't like it. at this point it's just a mandatory habit

[montanamp3]

[emerging from andrea long chu's females covered in blood] Oh my god I need to write

[almond-tofu-chan]

i want an au where Collei was adopted by Kaveh and Al Haitham instead of Cyno and Tighnari i think thatd just be so chaotic

[aesrot]

actually fuck you all, i should start advocating for reader inserts more openly

[flannelepicurean]

Sir, This is an Applebee's

Hannibal and Will have a toxic tradition of going out to dinner on the Mizumono anniversary. Will makes Hannibal take him to a terrible chain restaurant and pay for microwaved, mass-produced food with stupid theme names. But Hannibal does stupid monologues through the whole evening. Like...

Hannibal, extremely plaid: Does not the humble pollinator, in his industry, among the bright blossoms, bless us by his vigor with the fruit of the divine? With the sweetness of light?

Server, weirded out: Uh...welcome to Applebee's?

Hannibal, continuing in paisley: Ah, yes. The bee does indeed bring forth the apple as part of the sacred dance; and truly, we have been in paradise together. Tell me, Will; had we not wandered in the garden, sampled the forbidden fruit...would we be here in the bower of apples, tonight?

Will, bitterly: It's our anniversary.

Server, brightly: Oh! Congratu--

Will: no

Server: ...menus...

Hannibal, pinstripes: The Ouroboros is traditionally depicted consuming his own tail; however, Celtic imagery incorporating knotwork brings to mind--

Will: YOU STABBED ME.

Hannibal, plaintive: Because my heart was broken.

Will: ...I'm gonna get a well-done steak and put ketchup all over it.

Hannibal, sobbing: Wilhelm, you're no Teddy Graham, you're a monster.

Server: ...need a few more minutes...?

Will: HE WANTS THE LOADED POTATO BITES.

Hannibal, playing Pagliacci on his phone: The potato, or pomme de terre in French, the "earth apple"...

[astrxealis]

i will return on tumblr soon bcs i'm graduating hs soon and acads r done so i have a Lot of time on my hands for now Anyway can i just say am very proud of myself. got into the Top 1 school in my country, top campus, and a vv competitive stem course. yay 😁💝💘❤️‍🔥✨

[getpaidgetlaidgatorade]

asexual but like

Like in a doing it to please your girl kind of way

In a not being able to stand your reflection kind of way

like in a religious trauma kind of way

Everything sexual repulses you kind of way

on god bro

But in the back of your mind you’re counting down till the intimate encounter is over fr like feeling guilty for doing that like oh shit im stuck in my own head shit did she notice she definitely did ah crap uhhhhh type of way 💯🗣️🙏🔥

[mageofthepeople]

I am working on a new WIP. I have the first chapter finished and awaiting beta but I'm afraid it is pretentious AF.

[nuri148]

Clarity update (sort of)

OK, so I wanted to write but I was sort of tired and couldn't get in the mood so I designed a cover for my fic instead.

It is somewhat reminiscent of this AoT cover:

I used my Tea House sketch as a base for the background and then added the main characters.

But for the sake of honesty, I think I should point out here that I can only draw stick figures.

Behold!

I'll see myself out, don't worry.

[uriekukistan]

i loved this fic sm when i wrote it and now i hate it 💀

[sauntering-down]

this feels like something i would've unironically said on AIM in 2006.

[goblins-riddles-or-frocks]

I find it endlessly fascinating how in the Libation Bearers, when Orestes returns to Argos he uses news of his own death as a way to get close to Clytemnestra and Aegisthus in order to kill them. Whereas, I’m sure he could’ve simply approached as himself and been welcomed just the same. Instead he uses that ruse— perhaps to signify the death of who he once was, or simply as acknowledgement of revenge leading to tragedy and torment, which may not be a literal death but it could be a figurative/emotional one— and it results in Clytemnestra (and again Aegisthus but idc about him) in turn mourning the means of her own death.

[fadeintolight]

july 14. 30+ unread emails. experiencing persistent feelings of detachment from adulthood and reality.

[hibernationsuit-remade]

idk the person who wrote those tags sounds like some booktok/bookgram person who only reads coho & other tiktok shelf books (and thus easily gets hundreds read) and acts like they're somehow smarter than those who rarely read

[adhd-merlin]

She looks at Merlin from under heavy eyelids, drinking in the sight of him before he has to slip away and back to the quarters he shares with Gaius. He’s quiet, as if lost in thought — his cheek pillowed on his hand, while with the other he plays with a stray tendril of her hair, twirling it between his fingers. Gwen is looking right at him, and he is touching her, and yet it still feels so unreal to have him there, in bed with them, half-naked. She thinks of the night that started it all — an innocent conversation, a playful remark, Arthur’s shock at hearing about her kiss with Merlin turning into mortified arousal. “Do you remember the first time I kissed you?” she asks, out of the blue. Merlin’s hand stops and he glances worriedly at Arthur. It makes Gwen laugh because it’s unexpected, and ridiculous — that he should worry about this, after all they’ve done. As if they hadn’t coaxed him into it. “Oh, he knows,” Gwen reassures him. Arthur snorts softly into her neck. “You were just about conscious,” he drawls. “If anything, Guinevere is the one who should apologise to you.” Gwen pokes him in the side with her elbow. “I thought he had died!” “I didn’t mind,” Merlin interjects, and there’s a grin hidden in the curve of his mouth. “Clearly,” Arthur says, dryly.

from Call It Anything We Want on AO3

[cinnamontoads]

why do we worship neil gaiman again