#this was my 4 am thought after my cat woke me up to be a little bitch

[engagemythrusters]

the obscene amount of chronic pain Luke Skywalker must face...

[cherubimcore]

pairing: alastor x reader

author's notes: i wrote this fic a loong time ago and it was supposed to be a series but then my hyperfixation with hazbin hotel faded and other stuffs happened (*cof* *cof* college *cof* *cof*) so since i had fun writing it, and i started to watch hazbin hotel again and my hyperfixation is coming back i decided to post it and if pleople like it i might continue <3

p.s: i'm still writiing my logan howlett/phantom of the opera au hopefully i will post it soon <3

this wasn’t the first time that you felt you were being watched.

everything started when you left your parent’s house after college to have a fresh start in your life with a job in new orleans, the city where your grandma grew up, she was more than happy to let you stay at the house from her childhood, since no one lived there in a long time and she felt that a new generation was just what the house needed.

your first day at the new/old house went as well as one would expect, since most of the furniture was already in the house in some-what good conditions the only thing you took was your clothes, books and electronics.

that’s when everything started, on that first night at the house.

it was almost 4 am and you still were in your bed finishing some work for that day, when you saw the fist shadow, at first you thought it was your tiredness, you were awake looking at the computer screen for the past 5 hours trying to finish an important project, so you rubbed your eyes beneath the glasses, got more comfortable in the bed and continued your work.

but this time it wasn’t a shadow you saw, looking at you from the other side of the room was a man, he had deer ears on top of his head next to his antlers, he was wearing a red coat ragged along the bottom hem and long black dress pants, but the thing that stuck to you the most was his smile like a cheshire cat and black eyes with pupils shaped like radio dials.

with the blink of an eye tentacled emerged behind his back and grabbed both of your legs and arms beneath the blanket on top of your pressing your body in the bed until it hurted, you tries to fight back but the only thing you managed to accomplish was to drop your glasses on the floor breaking them, but you still could see him slowly walking towards you each step making him glitch in the reality until he was on top of you, you shut your eyes closed praying to whatever god that could hear you to help.

“ah, ah, ah!” the thing said, you could feel his hot breath on your cheek “i want you to look at me, my dear, i want to look at your eyes when i tell you that no matter the god you are praying he won’t be coming to help”

you opened one of your eyes, scared of what he may do if you didn’t comply.

“i want to look at your eyes and tell you that there’s no way of getting rid of me, darling, i have been interested in you since you crossed that door this morning, your blood smells so sweet i can’t wait to eat you up!”

you felt the dark tentacled slowly letting your arms and legs go free, you tried to get away from the man but he started to emit static noise that got more and more distorted until you had to put your hand on your ears to muffle the noise until…

you woke up.

you still had your computer on your lap, you were still beneath the covers and your glasses were on your face in one piece.

taking deep breaths to calm your racing heart, telling yourself that it was only a nightmare and you were safe.

but when you turned your laptop off and turned around to try and get some actual sleep, you missed the shadow on your door silently watching you.

“i knew we shouldn’t have let him do this by himself” husk said, opening a bottle of whiskey

“what do you mean?” alastor asked, his smile widening “i even said ‘i want to eat you up’ that’s the most romantic thing in the world!”

“we’re screwed!” angel dust groaned from the other side of the room “freaky face doesn’t even know what ‘romance’ means! i bet he can’t make her fall in love with him until the deadline, the next extermination is just in a couple of months! you guys should have let me do it!”

“you know that’s not the deal with the angels” charlie said while vaggie patted her in the back “besides i know alastor is doing his best!”

everyone in the room rolled their eyes, they knew that the radio demon wouldn’t do a favor like that if he had nothing to gain from it, so far it looked like he wanted it all to fail spectacularly.

“charlie!” charlie’s father lucifer came running downstairs with something on his hand “i have a new letter from heaven”

“well since my job from the day seems to be over i will be going have some dinner” alastor interrupted the king of hell and walked towards his room.

“i wouldn’t do that if i were you” lucifer stepped in front of him “it has your name in it and for what i understand you will want to read this"

taken aback from the serious tone in lucifer’s voice alastor stopped in his tracks and snatched the letter from the hand of the blond man in front of him.

with a sigh the deer man sat in the stool at the bar while everyone tried to take a look behind his back at the letter but failing miserably.

alastor tried to read the letter with a calm demeanor but each line made his eyebrows furrow and his jaw tightened.

[pleasantlycrazyworld]

hii i was wondering if you could do logan with reader that owns a cat and the cat acts JUST LIKE HIM and he cant stand it until reader points it out. thank you!!!!

I loved this request! I have my own little cat, so I wanted this to be as well written as possible. I'm sorry it took so long to be posted. I hope you like it! If you do, please like, comment, and reblog! It really helps me with motivation to keep posting on here <3

This is my kitten rocket 🤭

Logan was never afraid to meet anyone in your life. He had met your friends and family; he met your colleagues and even your old roommate, but for some reason, everyone is telling him he should be afraid to meet your cat.

Logan can remember every warning he got from the people in your life when they found out he hadn't met your cat yet. "Oh, that's her baby" "Oh he has brought a lot of joy into her life since she found him, he really is her number one" "That cat hates anyone that comes over-I swear it's crazy" "Her cat is just very territorial, very protective" "Make sure you wear shoes, he goes for the toes."

He scoffed at these warnings, it's still just a cat. He wanted your cat to like him, of course he did but he also wasn't afraid to meet the damn thing. He knew you loved you cat, that was your baby, and you took care of him more than you took care of yourself something Logan hated, but he didn't think it mattered what a cat thought of him.

You usually would stay at his place after a night out, but for the past few dates, you two went back to your place instead. It wasn't a big deal, but you were worried for how your cat would react to a strange man coming into his territory. "He just doesn't like people Lo', I don't want him to lash out at you." He could hear in your voice how worried you truly were, and he tried his best to reassure you that the cat and him would get along just fine.

He lied to you. Logan can't stand that fucking cat and that cat has it out for him too. The first night the cat didn't even come out of hiding, it completely broke your heart and Logan ended up leaving a bit earlier than planned because you were worried for your cat's wellbeing, as he was leaving he heard you cooing at the cat calling him your baby and your handsome man and though he'd never admit it aloud a twinge of jealous did echo through Logan's chest. The next night the cat did come out of hiding, just so he could attack Logan's legs. When Logan didn't kick him across the room like he wanted to you came and put the cat in your bedroom. "I am so sorry!! Are you okay??" You exclaimed while you closed the door to your room before trying to check on his scratches even though they healed before you could. He grumbled... sort of whined a bit too, and honestly, he was enjoying the attention, so maybe he milked the injury? Sue him.

What really pushed him over the edge was your cat literally pushing him over the edge. It was around 1 in the morning, and you had just fallen asleep. Logan was holding you in his arms and trying his best to fall asleep himself when the door to your bedroom creaked open. Logan, now fully awake, sits up, trying not to disturb you and is greeted with a sharp meow and sharp little claws to the stomach. "Mother fucker" Logan mumbled under his breath as he pushed the cat off of him, "why are you even in here?" he asked quietly so he wouldn't wake you but sharply enough to try and scare the cat away. The cat meowed louder than before as if he was arguing back and went to lay on your chest, purring as he curled himself into a ball. Logan was pissed but he tried to stay cool and just ignore the cat, then around 4 in the morning, Logan was awoken to his body meeting your bedroom floor. When he stood up, he looked at the bed and saw your fucking cat in his spot. "That's it." Logan had enough and grabbed a blanket before going to the couch.

You woke him up hours later, very confused as to why he was on the couch and was replaced by a cat in the middle of the night. "Baby?" You asked softly, handing him his cup of coffee, "don't. Just don't." He grumbles and sips his coffee, sending your cat a glare as he walks around smugged.

Logan refuses to lose against a damn cat!

It's just a stupid cat, not even 4 months old yet. So why was he letting its behavior get to him so much? Because it was your cat, and even if Logan wasn't ready to admit it yet he really did love you and for some reason you loved that asshole cat more than the world so for fuck sake that cat will like him even if it is the last thing he does in his very long life.

Honestly, it was truly ironic if Logan took the time to think about it. Your cat was a grump. He didn't want people around unless he allowed them to be around, and even then, he wanted his distance. But not when it came to you. When you were around, that cat was glued to you and had the loudest purr Logan had ever heard, and your cat really did get protective of you. It was something Logan had never seen before. Usually, cats don't care, but if you came home upset, the cat wouldn't settle down until you did, too. If he took the time to really think about it, maybe he could see the resemblance the cat shared with another grump you have allowed into your life that you loved more than the world.

Tagging:

@userchai

@mahi-tamashi

@100percentlazybonez

@lanassmarty

@western-pyro

@misscrissfemmefatale

@marit332

@navs-bhat

@fluffy-b33z

[mangooes]

I successfully, seduced a Dragon?? (or not)

Note = This is a very not so long one shot (might make it a short series) But this is heavily inspired by dragon and donkey from shrek. Please someone get me LMAO anyways enjoy!

Deep in the village of Tarus city, (name) your ordinary villager, lives a normal simple life. Well that changed when she was forced to look for a hidden herb in the mountains. 

“You must leave, no buts..we don’t have any more space for you to live…!” The village chief said as he dragged (name) across the village with a stern look. 

“Ow ow ow okay okay you cowards, I’ll leave, happy???Just stop dragging me!” (name) shouts, “ouch” she says when she feels the floor underneath her after the chief practically throws her out of the village. 

“So, I've just gotten kicked out of my own house? touche.” (name) said as she taps on her farmer pants to whip the dust off her. She stands up, her legs practically dragging across the road as she makes her journey to the large forest before her. 

“It’s all or nothing i guess..” the girl sighed before accepting her fate of possibly getting killed in the forest instead of the mountain. 

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Meet (name) your ordinary worker in Linkon city, well used to. That is until she fell asleep due to exhaustion, and woke up in a completely different setting. No longer the big high rise buildings, she was met with the surroundings of an old styled room, seemingly built from wood with a texture like some kind of elven age. When she opened the door she was greeted with a view of an old village. She thought  this was all a dream. Pinching herself, slapping herself to try and wake herself from this weird dream, all she gets is a bruised cheek and a red arm instead. 

‘Damn life, that sucks.’ (name) thinks when she first realized. But now she thinks… IT'S THE BEST THING TO HAPPEN TO HER LIFE!! No more office work, no more hunting, no more of the N109 zone, no more of a certain black crow always pestering her with its loud caws, no more of a certain white haired man who always seems to poke fun at her even tho he is undeniably hot- /slap 

What was she thinking?? Stop thinking about that white haired grandpa damn it! This is her new life. She's going to dream for real this time! Tired of her old repeat routine, Now she's going to live a slacker life with no attention as your typical normal NPC!...........

That's all a lie though.

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's been 4 days since she departed from her village, having no intention of going back to her (disgusting) village, (name) decides to live as a traveller (basically homeless now LMAO). With no maps, or compass, or any sign of ways for her to go, she just walks to a random destination, trusting her so-called “hunter instinct or feelings  I guess”. 

‘Now that i think of it, I kinda missed him…his stupidly annoying handsome face, his warm hugs, teasing personality’ (name) spaces out as she blinks a couple of times before a sound of a slap echoes through the forest followed with a loud exaggerated gasp. “No way… no way no way no way no way!” (name) frantics as if cringing on herself. “Why am I thinking of that guy in a time like this..” she ponders “Maybe I kind of like, like like him… just a bit.” she admits, her voice a bit more shy..a blush erupts on her cheek before she shakes her head in disapproval and continues her track as her gaze falls downwards. “Should I try finding a way back home..? “

“What a bummer, life seems boring again……guess life is meaningless after all…” a sigh escaped from her lips as she kicked a random pebble on her way up the mountain. Only for the pebble to hit a large boulder… with a rock stuck underneath it. As the saying goes ”curiosity kills the cat” (name) decided to inspect the said rock, finding it suspicious. Her face lights up in mischief. 

“Woah did I just find a secret cave or something ??? so cool linkon city could never.” (name) gasps in admiration, laughing at her own joke (heh) as she kicks the rock a  few times before the said rock completely rolls over to the side due to the sudden force. 

As she stumbles forward through the hole she just discovered..a giant cave comes in view. Seemingly natural, though it looks well taken care of.. as if somebody is living inside- 

Realizing her situation right now (foolishly) she decides to explore more ignoring the exit of the cave that is openly wide right now! :DD yay congrats you just got a death wish (name)! 

Walking slowly, her footsteps quite from her experience as a hunter she creeps in, her back against the rough walls of the cave… nearing the end of the tunnel (aka cave entrance typa thing) she peeks over the cave walls to check in on the surroundings making sure if its clear or not. Except it's not. 

A man with a serpentine long….tail.?...black horns, armored clothing..?...clawed hands… and an exposed back… with abs.. WITH ABS?!?!?!/slap

‘Pull yourself together (name)!’ she thinks shaking her head for the 10th time today in disbelief. Can’t believe miss girl is hustling over abs instead of the weird claws, tails, and stuff that isn’t supposed to be in a HUMAN’S body. Huh..? white hair… that signature hairstyle too! It seems so familiar. Hmmmm… ‘I can’t seem to remember where I've seen this before…’

She watches as the said man seemingly..asleep…?? with its relaxed state. ‘Time to get a closer look i guess..’ (name) tip toes as she steady her breathing to avoid the target of her curiosity (and admiration/ you got good taste (name)/j) reaching in front of the sleeping man..?? Is he even a man in the first place? She takes a closer look at his features. ‘Those wrinkly eyebrows, sharp jawline, trained ABS??/slap- wait im sure ive seen a person with this same.. iconic features…no way WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SYLUS??’ her mouth hanging from her face in shock, as she instinctively puts her foot in an awkward angle, leaning against the rocky surface of a makeshift throne (?) as if kabedoning the man (unintentionally- ehm girl) to take a closer look of course not pounding this hot motherfu-. 

Before she could continue her HOLLY  thoughts, red blood eyes now stared at her in amusement and annoyance. Uh oh that can’t be good. 

“Your footsteps are noisy...” the man(?) no actual dragon said with a disappointed sigh “And you breathe heavily..” his deep signature baritone voice cuts through the air, as he looks at her in a teasing manner, smirking with his eyebrows tilted upwards as if saying ‘enjoying the view?’ Meanwhile our protagonist just stands there dumbfounded, processing everything, until a blush crept to her face.

 “Wait what no this is all a misunderstanding i swear!  in the name of mephisto’s gem collections..hOLLY-” before finishing her rambles as she stands backing away from the now awake dragon man. A rough textured tail with sharp edges snaked up to her waist pulling her closer to the said dragon. Oh how the tables have turned..now (name) is the one under the man… OH SHIT UNDER THE MAN DRAGON??

“Before you try to kill me, did you consider that it would end like this?” his voice mused, as he the sharp edgy (sexy) looking tail snakes up to her waist in an awkward angle.

‘Huh?’ the girl deadpans as if her whole world just came into ruins. “Sylus! Don’t you recognize me?!?!?!” she looks up towards him in an irritated manner.

“How do you know my name, human? I’m guessing you humans tell a tale or two about me hm?” Sylus looks down towards the girl with a raised brow. “You didn’t answer my question, My patience runs thin…i think you would make a great afternap breakfast for me-” he teased opening his mouth to bare out those dragon fangs-

“Huh…? WAIT WAIT! I swear i have no intention of killing such a…uhhh” (name) pauses thinking of her next word choice. ‘Think (name) you stupid! what to say what to say!’ in a panic she remembers a scene from her all time favourite movie. The shrek, bravo (name) you are a genius! As she thinks of an absurd idea in her head. SLAYY GO GIRL GIVE US NOTHING! Eh back to the scene-

(name) shakes her head as she faces the person holding her captive, “I mean ehm mighty…handsome dragon..” as she makes a (stupidly) smirking face wiggling her eyebrows up and down in an attempt on… flirting…

Now that she thinks of it, she's flirting with sylus right now, a different version of sylus. Her mind barfed at the idea, the sylus she knew would probably teased her endlessly, asking mephisto to save the recording of such an historical event. But now is not the time. Urgent matters and her life (for once) is in the hands of death! 

“Huh such a strange being..are you even human?” The dragoman sylus chuckle in amusement (that's kinda hot) . “Ouch, that's offensive you big grown lizard. I’m hurt.” (name) replied in a disappointing manner. “Tsk tsk what a shame..” she continued blinking her eyes purposely. Blink twice if you need help, blink thrice if you want to touch that stacked chest and put it in bed- /stop get some help touch some grass. 

“I see your overconfidence truly led you to believe I'd be merciful…” the man smirks, in mirth as if enjoying the revelation in front of him. “Humans tend to be scared of such little things, running away when they catch sight of a dragon. Here you are entering my territory without permission…what a brave little mouse you are.” 

“Mouse?? excuse you..?-” (name) retorts as she yelps, feeling the serpentine tail earlier wrapping tightly (wow sylus wow) on her waist. “Feel your heartbeat right now..” the man whispered on her neck as she could practically feel the hot breath glazing her skin, his eyes looking at hers seductively.

“Don't forget if I apply more pressure at this very spot your heart will never beat again..” he grins like a devil. Mischief could be seen in his face as if he's enjoying teasing her to death. 

“Wait wait is calling you handsome not enough!??! I swear-” (name) replies.

“Hush now mouse..hmm ah yes..you are certainly amusing hm?” a clawed finger brushed her lips as the dragon man seemingly deep in thought. 

The girl with a disgusted face jerks away from the clawed finger speaking in a more impatient tone..” Yeah yeah since I have no use for you, why not just let me go yeah? Big strong handsome dragon..” the girl said in a sing-song voice as she moved, in an attempt to break free from the strong grip of his muscled arms and strong tail. “Are you going to stay this weak forever?” The dragon laughs in return, a pause before continuing “No.. I'm keeping you here lil mouse.” He smirked. HE SMIRKED. “And dragons tend to get possessive. We don’t exactly let our prey go with nothing in return..”

‘Ah I’m fucked.’ (name) thinks as an irritated smile crept to her face. “Oh yeah? try me drago.” she challenges with the most annoying expression she could muster up. A deep chuckle vibrated as a clawed hand grazed her neck, removing her strands of hair delicately.. bingo dinner is served. (Is (name) cooked? or cooking?)  

“This will be the mark for the first time.” Sylus says as he licks his long draconic tongue in hunger. “Until this mark disappears, prove to me you can be stronger.” He continues. (name) only looks at him in disgust. “Huh wait don’t tell me you're going to do what i'm thinking-” the girl says as different kinds of scenarios popped up tiny little head. “Wait don’t-!”

 Before she could finish her sentence, a pair of draconic fangs sinks into her skin, creating a black and red ancient mark on her neck…wait her neck?? DID SHE JUST GOT BITTEN BY A DRAGON? no wait MARKED?!?! Registering the pain she just felt now and how her mind seems to go bozo. A scream erupts from the cave deep inside the mountains, as the abyssal dragon takes a bite of his newly prepared delicious meal. 

ouch, that must have hurt a ton…. do it again sylus that's kinda hot- /slap

(PS , IM SO CRAZY OVER SYLUS'S MYTH CARD AND LIKE ASKDJASNK HELP ME)

[rqgnarok]

music to my eyes - jamie tartt

fandom: ted lasso

wc: 4,266

warnings: spoilers for the season 3 finale of ted lasso, jamie being a lil self deprecating. reader uses female pronouns.

summary: jamie has a crush on the band’s bassist. 

author’s note at the end!

Jamie’s so, so late.

Roy’s gonna have his balls. It’s the first training for the Queen’s Cup final against Tottenham– their first one without Ted, a little something before the freaking Champion’s League starts next year– and Jamie’s having the worst morning of his life.

He woke up late for his 4 am training that ran long, traffic was absolute shit and now he’s sprinting– not running, cause he’s not allowed to after he and Colin almost ran over the Prince of Denmark while racing each other to the locker room, a story for another day– down the hallway with Roy Kent’s fury just waiting to find its rightful owner. 

He didn’t even have time to comb his hair today. It still looks amazing, but it’s the routine that matters. For his mental health or whatever. 

Maybe that’s why he feels so jittery and doesn’t look where he’s going as he makes his way to the locker room. Jamie’s got his bag clutched to his chest and his headphones hanging around his neck, his jacket halfway on before he gave up and left it trailing down his side like a sad blanket. 

He’s cursing whatever Gods control alarm clocks and traffic and hairbrushes when he knocks onto someone. It’s so forceful it sends them both to the ground with a grunt and a little ah! of surprise. Jamie tries not to grow annoyed and fails. He considers laying on the ground and becoming one with the carpet so he doesn’t face Roy’s justified punishment and sighs out his nose, pushing himself to a sitting position.

“–so sorry,” and it’s a woman, Jamie just knocked out a woman in his rush to work. What’s next? Is he gonna hit a cat with his car? Maybe spit on a kid’s face? She keeps babbling apologies, unaware of Jamie’s foul mood. “–supposed to be at her office but there’s just– there are so many hallways–”

“‘s alright,” he cuts her off harsher than he means to, guilt stabbing at him when she looks at him with wide, remorseful eyes. Jamie sighs, dusting off his clothes and standing, offering her a hand. “Me fault for bein’ in a rush. Should’ve seen where I was going.”

“Oh, god, you actually know where you’re going,” she says with a grimace, accepting his hand. She’s on her feet and standing too close to Jamie for a second that feels like a lifetime– almost nose-to-nose with Richmond’s greatest. Her laugh is stuttery and nervous when she steps back, barely meeting Jamie’s eye.

She’s cute. Jamie’s not planning to do anything about it, especially not with his fine for being late slowly becoming one for missing training but she is. Cute. His mouth lifts in a half smile at the thought, charmed. 

“I was looking for Rebecca Welton’s office but I only got myself lost,” she says sheepishly, putting her hair behind her ear every couple of seconds since it keeps stubbornly falling out of place. Jamie’s fingers twitch a little but no. No, absolutely not, he’s not doing this to himself, no sir. “Is there any way you can give me directions without having to go with me? I don’t want you to be late for– shit. Practice, huh?”

Jamie thinks she’s the smartest woman that’s ever walked the face of the Earth until he remembers where they are. At Richmond’s training facilities. She’s looking at a disheveled man in a sports outfit. The story kind of tells itself.

“I– yeah,” Jamie stutters a little, clearing his throat to disguise it. “There’s, um, it ain’t a problem. I can take you there if you want.”

Her entire posture screams relief as soon as he offers, and it’s enough for Jamie to make up his mind even if she hasn’t said yes yet. “Would you? They said in the group chat not to be late and, like, they weren’t specific about it but you just know when a message’s for you, you know. And here I am, late–”

A beat.

“–and rambling,” she smiles at him again, the sight tugging at Jamie’s chest as he stands there like an idiot, his brain rebooting whenever she does it. “Yes, please. I’d really appreciate it.”

And so Jamie asks a kitman to take his stuff to the locker room while he walks her up to Rebecca’s office. His hand hovers but doesn’t quite touch the small of her back while he blabbers his way through small talk. Nice weather, today, innit, traffic was absolute hell though. Oh, you’re not from around here, that’s nice, do you plan on going sightseeing?

He delivers her to Rebecca’s floor to a thankful, ecstatic Higgins, who welcomes her with a hearty shake of the hand and promises that she hasn’t missed anything important. She’s barely able to spare him a smile and a quick thanks before the door’s closed behind them and Jamie’s standing there on his own, smiling at nothing.

He’s still wearing a dopey grin when he finally finds himself on the field, Roy yelling at him to run laps until sundown for being late. His legs are killing him, he’s £200 poorer, and he didn’t even get the woman’s name; but nothing can drag him down from his high and make him forget how she’d squeezed his arm in gratitude, touch warm and calloused against his skin. 

The next day Rebecca’s there before practice starts, looking tall and pleased as she claps her hands and shares the big news: since the final of the Queen’s Cup is being held right here at Nelson Road, she managed to get a band to play during the halftime show. They’ll be here the entire next two weeks for rehearsals and staging, so everyone must be on their best behavior if they don’t want their name in the summer transfer market.

Jamie doesn’t connect the dots until he sees her again, this time at a local bar big enough to house less than two thousand people. Keeley hears from Roy who hears from Beard, who heard from Higgins that Rebecca said the secret band was gonna hang around the city for a couple of other smaller, quick gigs. 

Jamie manages to excuse himself from video games at Colin’s with the guys and offers himself to Keeley as a buffer between her and Roy at a bar tonight. Though, in Jamie’s very humble and very right opinion, they’re already on their way to getting back together for good.

The band’s gathered a nice crowd, the lighting low and the thrum of the music hammering on Jamie’s teeth. He’s nursing the beer Roy bought him, the man charmed enough by Keeley’s presence that he let Jamie bend his rigorous diet regime. Just for the night. 

It takes three songs for the bassist to speak up, a makeshift spotlight landing on her, sweaty and delighted at being onstage. Jamie’s blood rushes to his face and his vision blacks out for a second. 

It’s her. No longer is she lost and out of her element, shyly asking a stranger for help. Both of her feet are steady on the ground, the strap of her bass snug around her neck. Her fingers are toying with the strings even when no song’s playing, an air of rightful confidence washing over the room as it takes her in. Jamie isn’t the only one suddenly breathless.

She grins against the microphone, coy. “Thank you so much for having us, Jaded Joker. We’re Karma Police, and we hope you have as much fun hearin’ us as we do playing for you.”

They fall into another song with that quick introduction and Jamie can’t take his eyes off her, barely hearing the song as the world around him slows down. Her clothes and jewelry sway with her to the rhythm of the music, the lights shifting seamlessly into different colors making her look ethereal. 

Keeley clocks it in immediately.

“She’s good, huh?” she nods at the stage where Jamie’s stranger is moving to the beat of the bass like no one’s watching, shamelessly enjoying herself and making funny faces at her bandmates. “Fuckin’ smoking, too.”

Jamie only hums in a very Roy Kent-like way, knowing there’s no fooling Keeley fucking Jones. The last thing he needs is to give her details and have her dip a toe into Jamie’s nonexistent love life.

Of course, he doesn’t take into consideration that Roy’s a brazen gossip.

“So,” Sam elongates the word as he’s spotting Jamie on the press the next day, happy watching him grunt at the effort. “How was the band last night?”

Jamie almost drops the damned thing on his chest.

“Roy said you enjoyed it,” he continues giddily like he didn’t almost commit accidental manslaughter by catching Jamie off guard. “Especially the bassist. What was her name?”

Sam fakes confusion for less than a minute before Jamie gives, mumbling it under his breath. He’d been weak and googled Karma Police in the privacy of his car before going home, swiping through the images that popped up until he recognized her face. 

(Y/N) (Y/L/N), the article he clicked on informed him. Jamie had repeated the name under his breath just to see what it felt like on his tongue for an embarrassing amount of time. 

Thanks to Karma Police’s bassist and lyricist (Y/N) (Y/L/N), the band’s sophomore album New Perspective has found a home in people’s hearts and high on the global charts.

Keeley wasn’t kidding. She’s good. 

“Oh,” Sam realizes, some of his amusement softening into genuine interest when he watches Jamie’s face do whatever the fuck it's doing. “Oh, you like like her.”

Jamie immediately flushes under Sam’s gaze, making sure the weight is safe in its place before physically fleeing the conversation. Sam doesn’t mention it to anyone, which Jamie appreciates so badly he could cry a little, but he does find his eyes across the locker room later when Rebecca comes in, four people in tow.

“Everybody, these are the wonderful musicians I spoke to you about the other day,” she says it in a way that screams I’m a pleasant human being and embarrass me and I will end your career right where you stand all at once. “We’re on a little tour of the installations and I thought we’d all come to say hi to wrap it up.”

The boys are charming and welcome them with ease. They’re not one of the most liked teams in England despite their bad runs for nothing, but Jamie’s frozen the second he catches sight of her. She’s a step behind one of her bandmates, shaking hands and smiling politely at conversations while staying slightly in the background, the stage persona from the previous night gone like taking off a jacket. 

Jamie takes pride in the way their eyes meet and her tight expression loosens, her smile blossoming into something more genuine, less unsure.

“Hey, stranger,” she says a little awkwardly after having gathered the courage Jamie couldn’t to cross the room and say hi. It feels like they’re alone in a room full of people, and for a second Jamie thinks he sees Sam stealing a few looks, making sure he keeps the others away and distracted for a little privacy. “Did you make it to training the other day?”

“What?” Jamie blanks like an idiot, then shakes his head when he remembers how they met; both of them, late for their respective responsibilities. “Oh! Oh, yeah. I– yeah. I had to run for me life to make up for it, but I made it.”

“Good,” she smiles, shifting in her place. “I, um. I’m glad we get to play for you guys. What you’ve done this past season, getting back to the top, has been unbelievable.”

“You’re unbelievable,” he replies, awestruck, and backtracks when she looks a little apprehensive. She’s doing the hair thing again, combing it back while it stubbornly escapes its place every couple of seconds. A nervous tic, maybe. “I mean– some friends and I, we saw you last night at the Jaded Joker. If anything, it’s an honor we get you guys to play for us.”

“Oh!” she seems pleased, ducking her head at the compliment. Her shoulders loosen again, and Jamie tries not to feel like he just scored a goal against Man City. “Oh, you should’ve said hi! Did you enjoy yourselves?”

“I did,” he says, too soft, and it feels like an admission of something when her eyes search his face, for a moment landing on his mouth before putting herself back together. “Up there, it’s like– it’s like you forget everyone else. You’re made for the stage.”

If anything, (Y/N)’s delight only strengthens, tugging at the neckline of her shirt. Jamie finds himself trying to follow the trail of new skin and flushes as well when he catches himself just in time. 

“Thank you,” she matches his tone. “You’d think it’d be nervewracking but it’s… silence. In my head. Does that make sense? I feel like it doesn’t.”

“It does,” Jamie agrees, breathless. It’s exactly how he feels when he gets the ball on his feet, every anxiety and worry and part of him he doesn’t like quieting the minute he steps on a pitch. “I get the same when I play. Peace in the chaos, I guess”

(Y/N) looks at him like she’s discovering the world’s eight wonder. 

“Kids!” her bandmate breaks the moment by coming over, arm draped around (Y/N)’s shoulder. (Y/N) blinks, looking a little shell-shocked. “Sorry to interrupt this party, but rehearsal awaits.”

Disappointment claws at Jamie’s belly, but before he can let it fester the conversation continues, bubbly and loud. “Alas! We’ll be done around 5. You’re welcome to visit then. We’re going to the third floor, I think.”

(Y/N)’s only amused at her friend’s antics, even if Jamie’s back to having a knot in his throat out of nervousness alone. Jesus, what’s wrong with him? It’s like he’s eight again and crushing on the cute boy that lived in the apartment in front of the Tartt’s. 

“See you then?” (Y/N) says, hopeful, and Jamie thinks it’s only fair he’s brave as well and nods as resolutely as he can. 

“I’ll be there.”

He ends up having to ask Higgins for directions, after promising he’s not gonna stir up any trouble at least four times. It takes Roy passing by and giving a few reassuring grunts, guaranteeing Jamie’s best behavior before Higgins gives him the location. When Jamie goes to thank him, Roy only points at him menacingly, though lacking his usual frown, and says don’t fuck this up. 

Rehearsals are just wrapping up when Jamie gets there, instruments being packed and people saying goodbye to each other when he makes his way into the room. He immediately finds (Y/N) sitting on the piano playing a complicated melody.

She lights up when she sees him, the music seizing. “You made it!”

Jamie stops her from standing up, instead sitting next to her after she scoots over to give him room. “That was nice. A song of yours?”

(Y/N) shrugs. “Hopefully soon. You never know, when you’re writing. You start working on a song and it ends up being a completely different thing from when you started.”

“Sounds messy,” Jamie says, a little consternated at the thought. Fortunately, (Y/N) laughs.

“It is. Do you play?”

“Fuck no,” he says quickly, then tries to explain himself as she splutters in amused surprise. “I mean, I don’t think I can. It seems pretty complicated. I’ve always been better with me feet.”

He reaches for the keys and begins playing some nonsense, loud and offkey, knowing it’ll make her laugh again.

“No, you gotta–” she cackles, placing her hands on top of his and quieting the dissonant echo of the keys. Jamie feels the tug at his lips, insistent, automatic, the same rush of delight that courses over him whenever he’s in her presence. “Gentle. Be gentle about it, jeez.”

She lines up their hands so her fingers move his and begins playing a quiet, fun melody. Jamie’s doing shit other than staring at her face, slightly twisted in concentration as she mumbles the notes under her breath. G, G, G, F, G, B, G, G…

“I know this one,” Jamie mumbles in recognition. (Y/N) turns her head to smile at him, pleased. “‘s from Nottin Hill, innit?”

“And a million other movies,” she murmurs back, unable to break the spell that’s fallen over the room. “I wouldn’t have taken you for a romantic.”

“‘s my favorite film,” he concedes, finding it incredibly easy to be honest when they’re sitting side by side like this, alone, their sides warm against each other. He loves his teammates, but (Y/N) didn’t know him when he was awful and arrogant, too cocky. There’s nothing she holds against him, no standard he needs to meet for her to be happy in his company. “Cried me eyes out at the end. Though I’ll deny it if you ever ask in front of anyone.”

(Y/N) laughs. “I promise I won’t. It’s a good movie. Doesn’t beat While You Were Sleeping, though.”

Jamie’s expression remains blank. (Y/N)’s face falls into disbelief, her hands tightening against his. “You’ve never watched While You Were Sleeping.”

He’s heard of it, but it’s hilarious to watch her forget herself, any sign of nervousness or polite shyness finally out the window. Jamie likes it– likes her, wants her to be comfortable with him and stop holding herself so tightly whenever she’s off the stage. 

“You poor, sheltered boy,” she exhales, aghast. “Holy fuck, I can’t believe I’m about to introduce you to the best romantic comedy ever made.”

Jamie goes to take the opening but stops himself at the last second. He knows this process; the flirting, the leaning in for just a moment so she smells his cologne then pulling away, leaving her wanting more. The asking for a date, a fancy dinner, then taking her home. Sneaking out in the middle of the night, dodging calls until she stops trying to reach him. 

He’s been doing it for years. He wants to desperately break the cycle and he wants to do it with her, but does he have it in him? Jamie’s been working on himself harder than he’s worked for anything else in his life, but what if he’s one slip away from becoming his old self? From turning out like his dad?

Sure, the old man’s changed, or– well. He’s trying to. But whether Jamie likes it or not he sees a little too much of him in himself sometimes, and he can’t do that to her. He’s known her for less than a week and he knows she deserves better. Everyone does. 

Roy told him not to fuck it up. Maybe this is what he meant. 

His expression stutters, shatters, and reestablishes itself in a matter of a moment, a blink of an eye. Jamie knocks his shoulder into hers gently, leaning back into place after a second. He teases: “And who made you the expert, eh?”

Rather than letting it drop, (Y/N) takes the bait just like Jamie knew she would. They stay there until a security guard comes to kick them out for the night, and they talk about everything and nothing. Movies, songs, bands they like, and foods they don’t. Jamie’s favorite players when he was a kid, his hero-like worship for Roy Kent, and how he’s made him a better player, a better man.

(Y/N) shares with him the first time she held a guitar in her hands, the albums she listened to when she was a kid that changed her as a person, realizing she could create magic through words and music. Her favorite cities to tour, how long she’s known her bandmates, how she’d die and kill for them if necessary.

By the time he’s walking into the pitch at Nelson Road two weeks later, the roar of the crowd around him swallowing every other sound, Jamie’s spent every free moment of his time with (Y/N) (Y/L/N). It was unavoidable, helpless as he is in his attraction to her, but Jamie doesn’t know what to do without, as Roy so carefully put it, fucking it up.

It hadn’t helped when (Y/N) snuck into the locker room to wish him luck, showing him the Richmond bracelet she was gonna wear onstage with a roll of the eyes. “Our stylist wouldn’t let me wear the jersey, but don’t you doubt for a second that I’m rooting for you, Tartt.”

Jesus Christ. Jamie had felt his cheeks warm up and dared to thank her with a loud, exaggerated kiss on the forehead that left them both grinning like idiots and Roy staring at them knowingly.

Before Jamie followed his teammates into the field, Roy had pulled him aside with a hand on his shoulder. “Tartt–”

“I know, I know,” he answered a little too self-deprecatingly. “Don’t fuck it up.”

But Roy only raised his eyebrows, realization dawning on his features. “You think I say that because I think you will?”

Jamie mumbled some not-words under his breath and Roy cursed. “Prick. I say it because you deserve good things, dickhead. And you should let them come to you when they do.”

Good things, Jamie thinks after one of his passes gives Dani the first goal of the night. The younger man jumps into his arms while hugging him tight and laughing into his ear, their teammates joining their embrace less than a second later. 

He looks towards the general area of the VIP seats where he knows (Y/N) and the rest of the band are cheering them on. He pictures her screaming at the top of her lungs, arms in the air, and being happy for him like she’s known him for all his life.

She might be the best thing. Whether he deserves her or not, Jamie wants her. Wants to be with her, watch romantic comedies until they both cry and spend his free afternoons watching her play the piano while he plays FIFA in the living room. He wants songs written about him that have him blushing whenever he hears them in public and for her to come to his games and be able to dedicate every goal to her he ever scores.

Good things. Yeah, Jamie can get down on that.

“You fucking asshole!” she jumps into his arms the second she finds him on the pitch after the game, a medal hanging from his neck and sweat sticking to his skin. (Y/N) doesn’t seem to care as she lets him lift her in the air, holding onto each other tight. “You did it! You fucking did it!”

“I missed your show,” he replies instead, only a little bummed. He’s seen her play live before but there was an itch under his skin the entire half-time, knowing how close she was and being unable to get to her. Jamie grins. “And stole it, too.”

“There he is,” she teases gleefully. “For a second there I thought you were gonna be humble about this.”

“I don’t even know what that word means,” he says cockily.

“And how’s Mr. Man of the Match gonna celebrate, huh?” she wonders, hitting him lightly on the chest now that he’s put her back on the ground. “A fancy club? Getting shitfaced with the boys? A date with your left hand?”

Jamie puts his hand on hers at the last second, stopping her from pulling away. She sways into him, all traces of joking vanishing from her expression. He forces himself to stay on her face, the urge to look away defeated by how she’s looking at him. In wonder, open, hopeful.

She deserves good things, too. Jamie is determined to be the one to give them to her. 

“I was thinking dinner?” he asks, fidgeting a little on his feet. “Maybe a movie? Thought I could see what While You Were Sleeping’s all about.”

(Y/N)’s mouth is fighting against a smile, somewhat hesitant still. Jamie doesn’t blame her, he’s been beating around this bush the entire time they’ve known each other.

“You want any company?” she wonders.

“Well, what kind of date would it be if it was just me?” he forces his features into faux confusion, watching her finally lose the battle and beam like a kid on Christmas. Her fingers twitch where he’s holding onto her hand.

“Not a great one,” she concedes, looking like all of Jamie’s dreams. “How do you feel about Mexican?”

Awful. Jamie feels awful about Mexican. He’s a white sexy boy in all the ways that matter and his taste buds punish him for eating spicy food no matter how much he likes it. But he can compromise. He’s starting to realize there’s very little he wouldn’t do for (Y/N) (Y/L/N).

“I feel fantastic about anything you like,” he answers truthfully. “I’m sure me tongue will forgive me eventually.”

(Y/N) laughs, fingers in Jamie’s hold shifting so she can hold his hand. “I think there’s a good lyric somewhere in there.”

“You plannin’ on writing me a song?”

She smirks. “Bold of you to assume I haven’t yet.”

Jamie squeezes her hand, leaning in to kiss her cheek. 

“Can’t wait to hear it, love.”

___

there’s an ache in my bones to make a series out of this fic omg

i can’t believe the show’s over (is it tho????) so here’s some jamie fluff to heal our tender, mourning hearts. as always you’re welcome to tell me what you think and chat jamie and ted lasso as much as you’d like! thank u for reading AND for all the love on my last jamie piece that you can read here!

<3

masterlist / ao3 / ko-fi

[ariathelamia]

Hellhound HRT Month 6 (4 month wolf 2 month Hellhound)

Heya! It’s me again… starting to do some note taking which… i got kinda chewed out on not doing any of that when i woke up in the hospital-.. wait fuck getting ahead of myself. Let’s start from after I parted with Mars.

So, yeah I got home that day pretty ecstatic to say the least, I mean who can say that they get their meds from an eldritch ritual!... well Mars probably can but that's besides the point let me have this! 

The tablets taste awful, which is to say a lot since my taste hasn’t been the same since about month… 3 or 4? Something something Carnivores taste a lot less than herbivores or omnivores. Well anyway, meat tasted better than before, that’s for sure, but yeah everything else always tasted kinda… bland… so i started to enjoy textures more than taste… where was I?.. Oh yeah, taste of the meds… HORRIBLE.. like someone mixed the consistency of chalk with the aftertaste of puking your guts out… urgh… made a habit of putting them in a little bit of food and then down them that way… that way i at least only taste the food at first and only later maybe a bit of the meds.. 

Sooo anyway, changes… they happen fast on this stuff!! Maybe that's because there is a lot of change to come?... Or the cheap shot Erian gives us some diluted shit because he wants us on the meds for longer for a better and long lasting payroll… anyway! 

The most notable change is my fur… it changed COMPLETELY in color! It used to be orange with a few gray streaks here and there and now it’s almost entirely black with some gray highlights like the fur on my chest or around my wrists and.. other joints. pretty neat! Could swear some of these kinda look like eyes.. especially those on my elbow and knees.. wonder if it’s like a mark from who i got those meds? Well they look cool so i won’t complain!

But yeah pretty much my entire body is covered in fur now, with the fur in my face being a lot shorter and more dense… It feels REALLY fluffy though… like i swear to god i brush through it, and if i don’t press down it almost feels like brushing throw air… that kinda soft.

When it comes to other changes in my body… my legs hurt somewhat now… i guess that means they are starting to change form now too.. becoming.. digigrate.. or something like that? Wolf like! 

My Nails have now pretty much fused with my fingers. They actually look like really sharp claws now. Can’t pull them in yet so… gotta be double careful when scratching myself… already nicked myself pretty bad when I scratched an itch on my shoulder.

The tail has been as fluffy as ever~ I love this thing!!! Helped me a lot with my balance when doing parkour too! it’s just great~ 

Oh yeah! I am slowly growing a snout! hurts like a motherf-.... but damn finally!

Uhm… other than that… i noticed some tightness in my chest about three weeks ago… thought i just overexerted myself but… turns out it was worse than that. Which brings me to the reason I actually ended up in the hospital.

So here I was… meeting some friends from an online group that's basically made by therians for therians, which is an outdoor activity club for those of us that love exercising with our new formed abilities! Tell ya what, ain’t a damn human out there that can teach ya better how to use that tail for balance than some cat therian who already figured it out~ it’s quite specific and you gotta get a feel for it.. but their explanations helped a lot in increasing my stability when free running! Anyway I trailed off.

So I met those people again, that day it was another wolf therian like me- wait.. not like me, forgot i’m a hellhound for a second-, then there was that persian cat therian guy… and big ol’ me! We started easy with warm ups and stretches… that's also when my chest felt tight again for a moment.. but it went away really quickly so i ignored that… bad mistake.

Then we started running around the park at first.. into a more urban area of Hyper City, where we started to climb the buildings, jump some walls… typical kinda parkour stuff! It felt great having the wind in my fur, and doing it with a couple people that get it the same way I do! And boy oh boy am I happy they were there with me… 

Memory is a bit hazy… but I just remember being… hot.. like literally… my chest felt tight as hell, pun intended, and I was literally in mid jumping motion, past the point of no return…. two… and a half stories above some alleyway… and I freaking passed out, like that… From what the others told me I was right behind them… and then I was gone… but they saw some smoke coming up from in between the buildings… I was incredibly lucky I fell into a dumpster.. but must have hit the wall straight on before that… They had trouble getting me out cause… turns out when i told Mars i’d love to have a “fire in my chest”... the eldritch must have listened and taken it literally.. or it’s simply a hellhound thing to have freaking FIRE IN YOUR CHEST. But yeah grabbing me was difficult, too close to my chest and they got burned… even my freaking tank top burned away… god am i lucky i got fur covering my chest already.. the possible embarrassment!! 

But yeah they apparently got me out, called the hospital… and rest is uh history.

According to the doctor’s i had several broken bones… collar… lower legs.. right arm and shoulder… minor fracture of the skull.. lots of shaved skin from hitting a literal brick wall.. 

and to top it all off… freaking 185 degree fahrenheit (or 85° Celsius for us europeans) fever.

They apparently had to put me into an ice bath… and cooled me with tons of ice packs to try and fight the “fever”. Only when Erian, after they had called him in for a consult, figured out what was going on, they simply put me on heat proof bedding and sheets… and kept the temperatures from reaching too high. Guess we Hellhounds can grow a flame organ, kinda like dragons, in our chest.. When I asked them later if that means I can breathe fire they shrugged… I tried but nothing came out except for some smoke.. we all start small… but what we did find out was that, the heat that the organ produces is linked to my emotions. 

When i get angry, it goes up a lot! Happiness and excitement raises it somewhat and the calmer i am, the more towards “normal” temperatures it goes… Still don’t know what sadness does cause… they didn’t wanna force me to cry… tough luck trying in the first place, but they hypoth-... hyppo… they think it would lower the temperature further.

Anyway i am trying my best to stay calm and not get mad cause… while my organ is already functioning pretty well… my body still can’t handle the heat super well… It hurts when it gets too high and I end up with fever symptoms… so yeah gotta wait till I build up some resistance. 

Oh if you’re interested… i was apparently out for about 12 days- plus side, almost two new releases of my shows to watch! But… when i was out… I had some weird dreams… about the moon?... but also about those places i’ve seen from that ritual… They asked me to elaborate about it but nuh-uh, not gonna say a word to them! Not before I talked to Mars about it. Anyway yeah i remember some… weird creature trying to talk to me, didn’t understand a single word but it looked… at least a very little like mars… just… no visible eyes.. some long ass head… and big fucking grin… 

Had some time to think about it all a bit.. and one thing strikes me as odd. While i do take my meds during the early hours and the evening… the changes happen mostly at night… at least the biggest ones… sure the pain carries through the day but it only ever gets really bad at night… So it’s odd that my organ started to become active during the day… hm… bad luck i guess.

Now I gotta explain myself to Erian… way too many questions but he allowed me to rest for now before he comes back and asks them again… “Where did you get those meds? What species did you choose? Are you getting your check ups? Did you think for a moment before taking some back alley medicine?!”... blah blah…. as if it wasn’t partly his fault i had to ask some more… devious powers to help. Not that I regret it. Though it was nice of him to talk to the staff to let me continue taking those meds for now! I’m also back on his schedule again… probably better to be on “Mysterious alien provided Hellhound HRT” with a doctor that has seen a couple weird things already. Therian care seems to be still a little bit of an issue in most hospitals.... then again who can say they have an idea how to treat a hellhound… not something people face on a regular basis like a dog or a cat… 

The only annoying part is that… i’m now pretty much stationary… I get some visits from friends of the support group, and the runners group too, they bring me things I need… like a new tank top for when i finally get out of here… 

Oh yeah-... and the pain… god having broken bones AND changing bone structure is NO FUN! And the painkillers they give me are wack…. urgh note to myself… if anything feels slightly off before or during a run… stick to the low ground… 

________________________________

Yay Part two done! Lets keep the fun times going~

Previous | Next

[charmedreincarnation]

Hello! How are you? I am very good for now. because after trying for over a year I switched to void state last night very easily! it was an incredibly amazing experience for me. I stumbled upon your account on tumblr a few days ago, I saw a lot of people have succeeded with the method you suggested! I felt so happy for them!

Now I will tell my own success story.

I used to be so obsessed with it that I was just procrastinating and "trying" to get into the void when I had so much work to do whenever I had free time.

Throughout this process, I always thought that I would not succeed and always went back to the beginning. I was very bad with everyone around me, I was constantly fighting and exposed to violence. In short, I was experiencing hell on this earth.

Months passed and I decided to focus on my life a little bit. I tried to think positively and convince myself how easy it was for me to manifest. But there was one very important thing that I forgot, all the evil forces in this hell were coming only on me, only me.

I spent the whole of last year and the first months of this year like a living dead...

But in these last few days, I have made a decision that will radically change my life. Before, I tried every method to enter void constantly, but something was not going well every time. So I decided that it would be easier and more useful to just assume that I woke up there, rather than making dozens of efforts to enter void 2 days ago.

THE DAY I FINALLY ENTERED THE VOID CONSCIOUSLY!

I didn't listen to the subliminal, I just did a 20-minute meditation, my wish to revisit life in more detail. At the end of the meditation, I said only one affirmation: I will wake up in void tonight.

I wasn't tired and very sleepy that night (these are usually what people think is necessary for a void).I just lay on my bed in my usual position and affirmed that I would wake up in void at night. After that I already went straight to sleep.

I woke up in the middle of the night, I didn't move. The sounds were so muffled, it's like you're listening to a song through a broken earpiece, that's how I heard it. I stayed like that for a few minutes, then the sounds suddenly stopped and I felt myself being pulled into the darkness. My heart was beating so fast, so I focused on calming myself. I couldn't feel my body anymore, as if someone was separating my soul from my body and floating it in a vacuum of space. That's when I realized that I really succeeded! And I calmed down for a while and then said my affirmations. I didn't make a special list, so I said it all one by one.

My manifests:

The face and body I dreamed of down to the smallest detail

My desired name, surname(i have two names in different languages)

My dream room and house with all the items on my Pinterest board(There were almost 50K pins on the board I mentioned...)

I overhauled my father as someone else entirely. With his nationality, zodiac sign, appearance, name.(I also added that he is a person who gets along perfectly with his 4 children and his wife!)

I made my mother younger in appearance, not in age, I also wished her a happy and peaceful life in every way.

As for our financial situation, my father is an extraordinarily wealthy businessman, we own the largest house and the most luxurious car in my city. We also have 4 modern apartments and 1 huge villa in another city! It does not end with these, we also have houses in America, France, England!

I also manifested new phone and other electronic gadgets.

We are 4 siblings in the family and we all get along very well, no hurtful words and no violence!

I have a private room for my unfinished clothes in my room and a very nice bathroom adjacent to my room!

I also manifested success in the lessons: no matter how long the paragraph is, it stays in my mind only once I read it and I never forget it! I do not have a single error in all the tests I have solved.

We have a total of 4 pets including 2 cats and a puppy and a husky dog. Our garden is huge, with a big swing, a covered area to sit in in the winter, and lots of lavender flowers, white roses!

By the way, I manifested that I have lived this life from the beginning, so our house is full of memories we have accumulated with my siblings and parents since childhood, our childhood photos everywhere, emotional diaries my mother wrote when she was pregnant.

I also manifested new friends to myself: one of them is famous (keep this part private lol), I wished to meet him since childhood. Apart from her, I also have a male friend who is our family friend and my best friend who lives with us.

That's all I wanted, I left everything else to my subconscious and my last sentence before leaving the void was "I will open my eyes to the life I dreamed of".

Finally, when I came out of the void, I heard my brother's voice, scolding me for turning off the air conditioner in my room and leaving it on until morning, and saying that he would be very upset if I got sick. (it did indeed come true more perfectly than I had imagined! )

The reason why I wrote my success story and the life I manifested at length is this: most people limit their desires and try to make do with less. Believe me, I was thinking the same way a month ago, thinking that living the life I wanted was unfair to the people in my life. But lately, thanks to what those people did to me, I realized that all this time I had been unfair to myself, not to them. After realizing this, I reminded myself that I only deserved the life of my dreams.

And now that I'm who I should be, I'm pretty happy with it. I can't thank you enough  my dear. The success stories you shared motivated me a lot and helped me take action.

I am so proud of you my love. I absolutely adore revision stories as well as the usage of intention which is my personal favorite method. No method is stronger than your will to have your desires. Thank you so much for sharing your story and I hope you continue to always live your best life <3

[gloriousunderstanding]

TW: Pet Loss

I lost my most special, precious boy this past Saturday. My beautiful firstborn son, Triton Copernicus, crossed the Rainbow Bridge just before noon. I held him as the doctor put him to sleep. I've never loved another living being the way I loved Triton. I adopted him in 2018 when I first got my own home; his paperwork said he was 4, but when I took him to the vet, they said he could be as old as 10. In late 2018 he was diagnosed with diabetes, and despite regular insulin, there were other complications that led to Triaditis and then ketoacidosis in early 2019. I had to take him to emergency care, but they said with treatment his prospects were good, so I spent several thousand of my savings on his hospital stay and recovery.

For the next 6 years, he flourished.

This guy was my life. We had a routine. He was my perfect little boy and he slept against me under the covers every night. He got his insulin injections twice a day and he was good about it. He loved dinner. He spent most of the evening in my lap made biscuits whenever I'd speak to him. He loved cheese, the rain, and grooming me. He'd consistently stand in front of my computer monitors and knock my mouse off the desk for attention. He'd slap me if I were in bed and he needed something.

He'd been to the vet for his last checkup just a year ago.

Saturday morning, I woke up around 6:00 AM and he was in the bed, but he wasn't acting right. He was disoriented, stumbling, losing his balance, staring at nothing. He started puking and having diarrhea. I took him to the vet at 9:00 AM and after bloodwork and an ultrasound, the doctor told me he had a mass in his abdomen, it was surrounded by fluid, his liver and kidneys were failing, and his blood sugar was critically low. She said I could take him to UT Animal Hospital for emergency surgery, but he was in such a compromised state that it was very possible that he wouldn't make it through surgery, or the subsequent treatments, and even if he did, I was only giving him a little time that would probably be miserable.

Looking back, he did seem a little less active the past week, but cats are notoriously good at masking pain. If anything, I thought maybe his insulin needed to be adjusted.

If you've ever had to make the choice to put a pet to sleep, you know that the guilt is awful. You second guess your decision, even if the vet tells you you're making the humane choice. There's a part of me that is at least grateful that the end came quickly; I'm not sure I could have handled seeing him suffer and waste away. But at the same time, Saturday was a shock. After the doctor told me his test results and I understood what was going to happen, all I could about was how in the last couple of days, everything I'd experienced with Triton had been his "last" -- his last dinner, his last time chasing his sister, his last time making biscuits, his last time sleeping against me.

Now, I hate being at home. I see him everywhere. His toys, his favorite blanket, his insulin bottle in the fridge, every fucking piece of fur on my bed and clothes. I've never felt pain like this. I knew it would come eventually, but fuck. Nights are the worst. He should be in my lap right now. He should have just had his insulin and his dinner and he should be napping in my lap while I bullshit online. And then in a few hours, I'll get into bed and he'll get into his regular spot to my right, wait for me to pull up the covers so he can get under them, and then curl up with his feet against my skin, and his nose against my arm.

None of that will ever happen again and I miss him so much, it really does feel like there's a physical void in my chest, in my stomach. I keep having to stop my thoughts because nearly all of them are of him and if I dwell on it for more than a few seconds, the tears start. Everything that brought me joy just feels bitter. The rain (Triton loved the rain like I do -- I'd crack the window and he'd lay there and smell it and listen to it, and nap), the snow (I thought I'd have another cozy winter with him, but I won't), the electric fireplace, my snacks (which he'd try to steal) games/movies (he'd lay in my lap as I watched them, and sometimes I'd comment to him). That little boy was part of literally every aspect of my life.

Apologies for the long, rambling post, but I have so much grief in me that I wanted to channel it somewhere. No one has to respond to this, I know it's awkward and a lot. But if you've lost a beloved pet, you'll know what I mean. I have two other cats, and I'm sure this sounds terrible, but I never bonded with them the same way. Triton was different. I love them, but my feelings for Triton were literally like he was my child. It hurts to even pet my other cats now, as cruel as that sounds. I pet them and I think of Triton.

I hope he was happy. I hope he understood, as much as he could, that I loved him. I think he probably did. I'm glad the vet told me I did the right thing.

I know time is the only thing that'll help, but God. I hurt so much I wish I could put my body on hold.

[icarusredwings]

Early mornings with Retired Time Lords ❤️💙ft. Shadow the cat stuffy and KITT-E (or KIT-TEC)

"Darling, can I have my leg back?"

"Huh?"

"Sigh... I thought I told you not to stay up too late?"

"... What?"

I passed out and woke up to this being done.

I like how 14 is just 14 with braids and a robot companion and sax is bassically an oc at this point with how many head canons I've slapped onto this man (Though im sure they are definitely NOT hot takes)

For 14: <3

-Was up til 4 am. Hypocrite.

-Wears braids to bed

-Steals Shaun's fluffy robe

-striped spongebob socks

-Holding KITT-E

-Bassically has a mullet at this point

For Sax: ✨️

-Pointy ears

-Roots are showing

-Babygirl

-Sharp ass teeth

-Doesn't know where the fuck he is

-Doesn't wash off his eyeliner

-Not his hoodie (NASA hoodie is 14s)

-Worst Prime Minister

-Holding Shadow the stuffy (made by Rosie)

-Heart briefs

-Bros got arthritis so sometimes he wears a knee brace. He's holding 14 for balance and comfort.

-Teletubbie socks

-#Girlboss (Pore mask, Facial avocado mask and bonnet)

(You can tell who I favor)

And KITT-E!! (Technically its KIT-TEC but KITT-E sounds better and I dont think doc wants anything to with any "TEC" s after the Suketh nonsense.

KITT-E aka:

Kilohertz

Intercepting

Telepathic

Transmitter

Electronic- Companion!

Used to be a stuffy made by Rosie until he ripped it up and made the TARDIS a smaller physical host in order to control and mess with.

KITT-E doesn't need food, water, litter, shots, doesn't get cold, can infact overheat/freeze though. All she needs is loved (and charged sometimes) The TARDIS is connected to her like bluetooth. Her ears have recording speakers that speak directly to the TARDIS and the large ball at the end of her tail is a lightweight circulation battery. (She's also magnetic). Her whiskers are how the TARDIS tells her what to do, and her big camera eyes are how she can see.

KITT-E is NOT water proof (yet, hes working on it) and can meow, purr, hiss, growl, and if she wants too, since she's bassically just a transmitter box, The TARDIS can send telepathic information to the doctor by KITT-E (imagine a hot spot shifting Wifi from one spot to another)

KITT-E technecally is just a host, so if the TARDIS gets too upset or broken, KITT-E will simply collapse. Syliva thinks she's creepy because "It's like a ghost possessing a toy"

So far KITT-E has pawed at doors, meowed for attention, followed 14 around, meowed to be let outside, has been scolded for hissing at the Master several times (she still remembers what he did to her), and sometimes you can see her staring at the bugs in the garden.

The more information the TARDIS gets, the more the cat can do. She also likes to curl up with Sylvia, checks on Rose, follows Shaun around curiously, paws at Donna for attention, and "naps" with Wilf. Which is bassically when she purrs, so he's happy with the vibration and sound setting and goes into battery saver mode. Wilf thinks that KITT-E is absolutely the most impressive thing ever and constantly praises the Doctor for making such gagets. Wilf doesn't call her KITT-E though and will call her TARDIS.

"Here kitty.. TARDIS do you want some of my fish?"

"She can't eat dad."

"Oh. Right. Poor TARDIS. No fish for her huh? Why not?"

"Because.. She dosnt have a stomach? Or a digestive system? She doesn't even have a throat to swallow. Theres just wires and gears dad."

"Oh thats so clever. You're so clever boy."

"Really? Heh.. well...it wasnt that hard."

"Oh I mean it. Shes brilliant. TARDIS do you want to come nap with me?"

"Meow?"

Wilf just bends down to look her in the eyes like,

"A nap. With me? Would you like that?"

"Heheh, you don't have to talk slowly, dad she can understand you (oh my hearts)"

[bisupergirl]

what would you say were the most in-character cwsg kara moments? (also, do you think it was any more faithful before it moved to the cw?)

prefacing this by saying that I hardly remember like 90% of anything that happened in that show (and what I do remember is mainly from seasons 1 and 4), but off the top of my head here are some in-character (imo) cbs/cw!kara moments:

i've talked about this one a couple times, but that scene from the very first episode where Kara angrily confronts Cat after she names her SuperGIRL has a really great start:

Kara: "Supergirl"? We can't name her that! [...] It's just, uh... I don't want to minimize the importance of this. A female superhero. Shouldn't she be called "Superwoman"? [...] If we call her "Supergirl", something less than what she is, doesn't that make us guilty of being anti-feminist?

because she's right! she's literally right. and yelling at her boss (and other figures of authority) because they've done something that she strongly morally disagrees with is something that comic!Kara loves doing. this scene started out so nicely but immediately fizzles out once Kara backs down when Cat goes on her dumb "what's wrong with being a girl? i'm a girl!" speech and has to be bailed out by Jimmy so she doesn't get fired. comic!Kara would've kept the energy throughout the entire argument and either quit or gotten fired right there. and she would've told Cat to drop dead (her favorite thing to tell her bosses).

another moment I really liked is from 1x06 when she's venting to Jimmy:

Kara: Growing up on Earth, I never felt normal. And I always thought that if I started to use my powers, my life would make sense. But I'm realizing that... being myself doesn't make me feel more normal. And it never will. Because my normal life ended the second my parents put me on that ship. And that makes me so mad.

yep, that's Kara alright ! it really is so fundamental to Kara's character that she can never really be "normal" again. she can begin a new (and fulfilling!) life, but the version of her that lived on Krypton—the girl who got into trouble with her friends, who loved learning about her peoples history, who bounced her baby cousin on her knee, who shared her passions of art and science with her father and mother—is gone! she can carve out a new version of "normal" for herself on Earth, but that girl who woke up everyday and lived on Krypton is gone—and that haunts her!

and of course you have the classic and much beloved scene from 1x08 where Kara screams at her mother's hologram when she finds out Alura used her to draw her aunt Astra out of hiding and arrest her:

Kara: Could she have saved us? Alura: She was a criminal. Kara: But was she right? Alura: I am not programmed to give you that information. Kara: Tell me! [...] You let everyone that I love die! You left me! You left me alone! You sent me away! How could you do that?

and then this exchange between her and Alex:

Kara: She lied to me. Alex: Kara, that wasn't your mom. You don't know what happened then. Only what Astra is telling you now. Kara: I know that Astra and I were both given life sentences by my mother. We didn't have a choice.

Kara having a complex relationship with her mother and overall feeling deeply alone and abandoned by her parents is so important to me and very important to her character. this scene really fits in perfectly with that post I made a while ago that compiles the different instances across continuities where Kara admits to wishing she had stayed on Argo City instead of being sent to Earth alone. she's really the loneliest and most tragic character in the world !

okay and one last scene (well. multiple scenes) from season 1 that I really enjoy is from 1x16 where Kara gets infected by red kryptonite. I truly believe that the first 10-ish minutes after Kara gets infected is the closest cbs/cw supergirl ever got to capturing pre-crisis Kara's energy:

Cat: Oh, and look at that. A reward. Somebody gifted me tickets for Club Apocalypse for Friday night to see a Scandinavian DJ whose name I won't even try to pronounce. Kara: Thank you. I'll put them to good use. Siobhan: Do you even know how to dance? Kara: Don't be jealous. Or do, I don't really care.

K'hund: Your mother— Kara: Sentenced you to Fort Rozz, blah, blah, ruined your life, I've heard the story. You wanna fight about it?

Kara: Hi, Siobhan! Siobhan: What do you want? Stalker. Kara: Messenger downstairs wants you to sign for Ms. Grant's flowers. Siobhan: Okay, you do it. Kara: Well I would but Ms. Grant needs me to proof a column for her ASAP. I'm sure one day she'll give you more editorial responsibilities too.

Kara [to Siobhan after she gets fired]: Well, I guess that's your exit. [...] Well, that was awkward. But not surprising, though. She was a bad seed, it was only a matter of time.

the Kara / Siobhan catco scenes in particular really remind me of pre-crisis Linda Danvers / Nasty Luthor and the workplace feud that they had back in adventure comics. one of the biggest failings of cbs/cw Kara is that she's not enough of a dick. comic!Kara can be an asshole sometimes! she's catty! she's not above having a stupid feud with a coworker that she hates! she can be somewhat of a dick and also be kind and compassionate, they're not mutually exclusive.

moving on! (and skipping anything from seasons 2 and 3 because it's been literal years since I watched them) fast forward to season 4, I liked the scene in 4x08 where the US President fired Kara from the DEO for not revealing her secret identity:

Kara: If I did that, sir, everyone I know, everyone I love would be at risk. President Baker: My family is with the Secret Service as we speak. You think they're not in danger? No one should be above the rest of us. We need to put country first. Kara: I'm sorry, sir. I can't give you what you want. President Baker: Then, I thank you for your service, but you're dismissed, effective immediately. I hope you'll comply. The United States does not want a war with Supergirl. Kara: Then I trust you won't start one.

FINALLY Kara gets fired from one of her jobs, it's about damn time ! but seriously Kara standing her ground in this matter, especially when the President is trying to make it look as if she's selfish and thinks she's above or better than him or anyone she protects ("MY family's with the Secret Service!! NO ONE is above the rest of us!! you're putting YOURSELF before the country!!"), is VERY comic!Kara. she knows he's full of shit and she won't be guilt tripped into doing something she's not comfortable doing, even when it's a direct order from the US President. and I especially love the "then I trust you won't start one" at the end of their conversation. get his ass.

there's definitely other moments throughout the show that give comic!Kara to me, but alas, I don't remember any. I loved anytime she was onscreen with Nia though, so take that as you will.

as for the second part of your question, I don't think the show was any more or less faithful to her comics when it switched networks. however, just in terms of Kara's personality, I think she actually somewhat improved once the show moved to the CW. I just find the overly bubbly, "adorkable", "golden retriever" type of personality they gave her in the first season to be SO grating, and I felt that she mellowed out once the network switched. as the show went on Kara matured and grew more of a spine, which is more accurate to the Kara I love from the comics.

imo the first season did a good job when it came to touching on Kara's connection to Krypton and letting her feel complex emotions about her past, but I think it's disappointing in every other aspect. they majorly declawed her and they centered Superman in a really annoying way by constantly comparing her to him and just mentioning him unnecessarily (not to mention changing Kara's character to be more like him and giving Clark HER villains (yes i'm still mad about the show's version of Reactron)). make no mistake, CW Supergirl is not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but they let her be more of an established and confident hero. obviously that's just like. character development. but even so, when you compare season 1 to Kara's early career in the comics, it's just like. kind of insulting ! 15 year old, incredibly traumatized comic!Kara was doing a better job at being Supergirl than 24 year old show!Kara. just a shame!

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #285

Despite the fact that the last 10-15 hours were objectively amazing, at the moment, I feel almost unbearably empty. It seems like the weight of it is crushing me, even though emptiness isn't technically supposed to weigh anything. Weird. I have a playlist on, consisting of a few simple songs, trying to keep myself afloat. Honey Trees, by Michael Bell. Taswell, Dreiton, and Aria Math, by C418. Invisible Hand, Champion, On the Beach at Night, and Weep Not, My Child - all by Curtis Schweitzer. I also have in there a song called To Faraway Times, from a game called Chrono Trigger; the version of it I like is done by a person named Malcolm Robinson. Maybe you'd like some of these. Or maybe not. Maybe you can give them a try and find out, if you want to.

…Sephiroth, I don't have a reason to feel this empty. Aside from the things that come with being a queer autistic AFAB with ADHD and C-PTSD, life is perfect. I eat when I want. I have two beautiful, wonderful husbands who love me. 5 adorable cats who love being near me. A plethora of awesome and supportive friends. More games to play and inspiring stories to witness than I know what to do with. Lots of beautiful teas to delight in. A warm house in a safe neighborhood. Clean water to drink, reliable electricity… the list of blessings in my life goes on and on and on. I could literally be here for hours listing them all. But that'd get boring, I'm sure. So I won't.

…I don't know what's wrong with me. It's a little scary, actually. Today, I caught myself thinking again about how nice it would be to just… stop… being. For a while. I haven't had thoughts like that in some time now. If they're cropping up, there must be a reason - a neurochemical issue that can be solved. I just… I don't know what it is. Is it the fact that I woke up to horrible cramps and lots of bleeding? Is it that there isn't enough sunlight for me to feel good? Maybe I didn't get enough sleep? Enough water…? Is there some nutrient I'm missing from my diet…? Is it the anticipation of getting 4 teeth yanked out the day after tomorrow…? Dealing with being in consistent contact with that acquaintance, who likely will never understand that I'm a full human instead of just a walking Google for his use? Some combination of all of the above…?

…

Well. I tried doing stuff anyways. After writing last night's letter, I had a really good Dead Cells run. I made it to the Astrolab again. And this time, instead of getting my ass kicked by the enemies there, I actually made it to the room beyond, called the Observatory. I took pictures; I promised you that I would get pictures in a recent letter, remember? Here:

...I streamed this run on Twitch. On my Twitch stream, I have a couple banners. One says, "Yes, I know I'm bad at this game. Be nice or go away." The other tries to tell people that the chat isn't easy for me to see, so I can't always respond immediately.

...Well... some person on the internet who was watching me fight The Hand of the King said to me that they "don't know why [I] say [I'm] bad at this game, because [I] parry like a god".

...I felt warm and fuzzy at that for a little while, but... then I felt a little badly about it. I tried telling this person that I am not actually very good; I am actually dyspraxic, and so I had to work a little harder to get this far than most would have had to. My progress has been slower than what a person with a normal brain with normal motor functions would have been capable of. I told this person that I still sometimes have instances in which my rhythm and timing are poor, that I still sometimes get overwhelmed and panic, that I still sometimes make mistakes and get overrun.

...Sometimes I still fall. Most of my runs still end in failure. I still haven't been able to defeat most of the bosses without getting hit. Although I did manage to defeat The Concierge without getting hit in last night's run, and that felt pretty good.

...

...I think I am afraid of accepting compliments because I'm afraid that if I do, then it'll set the other person up for having unrealistic expectations of me. They saw me while I was in a flow-like state, having a good rhythm, and being successful; what kinds of abuse might they sling at me, the very moment that I falter or fail to do the thing with the level of precision and flawlessness that they've come to expect...?

...When I think of these fears, I think of my mother. I get the praise from her as long as I can be perfect, as long as I can be someone she can brag to all her stupid little fucking friends about. But the second I slip up, the second I'm not flawless, the second that I behave like a human instead of an automaton, the second that I defy her unrealistic expectations of me, her perception of me does a 180 degree turn, and I go from being "oh so smart", "gosh how reliable", "so diligent and thorough" and "wow so creative" to "stupid", "oblivious", "ungrateful" and "disrespectful" in no time flat.

...I guess I'm a little afraid of compliments because... I guess I feel like it's only a matter of time before I become a disappointment instead. And... in my experience, I've found that when I am perceived as a disappointment, the thing that follows soon after is rejection or violence.

...

Anyway, I got my ass kicked by The Collector at The Observatory. I wonder, perhaps somewhat bitterly, how "godlike" this person thought I was as I was being tossed about the screen, if they were still watching me as I fell. I wonder how quickly their opinion of me changed. I wonder if they decided that they were wrong about me and that I really do suck at this game, after all.

...Or maybe that's just my old childhood conditioning, telling me that I have to be infallible and beyond reproach before anyone will think I'm worth anything. If my childhood conditioning is running the show right now, I must be pretty tired. I'm going to take a deep breath and recognize negative thoughts like those for what they are - abuser propaganda, fed to me in the past as a means to keep me weak, isolated, self-doubting, and easy to control.

...Sigh. It's very lame. But that's okay. We can defy the old things. We can remember what is real and what is good. I can still be perceived as good even when I make mistakes and fall down. And it's only unhealthy people who will respond to my inherent imperfection with violence, rejection, and hate. My worth is not defined by how well I can live up to others' expectations of me.

It's okay that I got my ass kicked by The Collector. It just means that I can face him in the training room until he stops kicking my ass. I'll do the same thing I did with The Hand of the King; every time I defeat him, I'll lower my stats by a single point, until I'm satisfied that I can defeat him, even at a significant disadvantage. Then, when I face him for real, it'll seem easy by comparison.

...I went to bed later than I should have, last night. That's probably not helping matters.

Well. My body was not in a great state when I woke up, in any case. Lots of cramping and bleeding, like I said, which was already anticipated and accounted for. I made the steak. And I made the weird garlic bread.

I seasoned the steak with my usual combination of spices - salt, pepper, paprika, and garlic powder. Can't go wrong with those:

I made mac and cheese, too:

I also made garlic and herb butter - this time with only half the garlic I normally use. I spread it on a handsome loaf of bread, split in half:

From here, I prepared the brie I got:

...This one is a triple cream brie, which means it's SUUUUUPER soft and gooey. And since it's a brie, that means the rind is also edible.

But... two things about brie. Very important:

The first one is that you DO NOT under ANY circumstances want to eat too much of it in one sitting. As far as I understand it, all the soft ripened cheeses have a small amount of listeria in them. And a little bit won't hurt you, but if you eat too much, you'll get a lot of it, and too much at once will take root in your digestive tract and cause problems. I only know this because... well. I stress-ate an entire wheel of brie in one sitting a number of years ago, and after the two-week incubation period, I ended up with a fever high enough to cause confusion and mild delirium. And then everything I ate passed through the other end just chewed - wholly undigested. It was a VERY BAD TIME.

-2513847 out of 10 stars, ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT RECOMMEND.

The second one is, while the rind doesn't taste bad in its unmodified state, if you try to incorporate a whole brie, rind and all, into a sauce, the rind will make your sauce taste like the way ammonia smells. Or at least, that's what happened that one time when I tried to make a berry and brie sauce. I just combined mashed blackberries, sugar, and a whole wheel of brie into a saucepan on low heat and blended them together, and it should have been delicious, but... it very much WAS NOT. It was so bad that I had to throw it all away; it was not salvageable. I concluded that heating up the rind for more than a minimal amount of time makes it weird. Don't do it. It's bad news.

Anyway, so I cut off the rinds from the brie. It's really not bad, especially if there's still a decent amount of cheese attached to the rind:

...It's got a bit of an earthy, almost mushroomy flavor to it. The ammonia flavor is there if you're looking for it; it's not exactly subtle, but it's overridden by the other flavors, usually. It's not bad though, especially if you wrap it in something yummy to go with it, like roast beef or prosciutto or something:

The knife looked like this after I cut the rind off; you can tell it's a super gooey cheese just by looking at it. Mind you, this cheese was still cold:

...The rind tastes a little weird, maybe. But the cheese inside the rind is unbelievably buttery and delicious.

...Anyway, so the garlic bread was baked, and then I put the cheese on it; brie on one side, and muenster on the other, because M and J aren't overly fond of brie:

...We melt it in the oven, and then we stick the prosciutto on top after that:

From there, we cut it up into delicious slices:

...Here's the resulting plate of yummy deliciousness that I put together in order to try to replenish all the iron I'm gonna be losing over the next 10 days or so. I wish I could give you some:

...I kind of... floundered around for most of today. I didn't even play any Dead Cells. I'm hoping to tomorrow. But I've got a couple things to do tomorrow, so we'll see. I talked to a few people on and off. I have a friend in this space who talks to me regularly, and that's always delightful. And I have another friend who sends me heartwarming pictures on occasion; today it was a VERY cute caterpillar!!!

Even on days that feel empty and strange, I still gotta try to remember that there are good things. Even if the present is ouchy, and even if the future seems scary, we still gotta try to hold on to the things that are good. These are the things that give us strength so that the scary things are a little bit more bearable.

Towards the end of the day, I managed to snag a couple nice pictures of the sky for you:

I also managed to snag these pictures of Mogwai chilling out in my lap as I write this letter to you:

...Though I think I'm just about done with today's letter, I'll probably be stuck here in this chair a while; it is currently illegal for me to move, hahaha! Sometimes I wonder if I should have named him "Monkey", because he's always climbing all over me, ahahaha~!

It is a good "problem" to have. 🙂

Though I still feel inexplicably empty, you don't gotta worry about me. I know that states like these are only temporary until my brain sorts out whatever it's gotta sort out. I'll keep trying to take care of my body in the meantime until whatever's going on makes its way out of my system. And it will make its way out of my system; I know it because I've been here before, and I've been in worse spots before. Unpleasant states aren't permanent. You just "focus on what you love, right under your nose" (as The Horse says), and keep solving the obvious problems one step at a time until things turn around.

I'll be okay. And you'll be okay, too, as long as you don't give up hope for a better future. Keep striving for your safety, and for the safety of your friends and your planet and all the people on it, okay? Keep solving one small problem at a time. Keep making kind, good, loving, compassionate choices, even when it feels really hard to do. Keep looking for the magic in things, even if your heart feels heavy. Keep finding the good within yourself, even if you have doubts. And please... stay safe out there, with whatever it is you're doing.

I love you. And I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[hostilemuppet]

So, backstory. I (39M) married my husband (29M) a few years ago (I was 36, he was 26). We got together after a passionate night of lovemaking in a motel room after meeting in a gay bar. I realised the next day that the handsome stranger was actually the guy who had made multiple attempts on one of my brothers (28M, then 24) life (dont ask why hes not in prison, money can accomplish anything) and figured out pretty quickly that he was using me to make my brother miserable. Now since he was playing with my heart, I thought that at least I should have my own fun, yknow? So I started messing with him a little, encouraging PDA that he wasn't really that interested in (were both pretty high profile so public image was important to him, and also im not sure if he even liked boys?), "influencing" him to buy me things I didnt need. I'm not a monster, I was just fucking with him a little for funsies.

Anyway eventually I asked if he actually loved me etc etc so he bought us cruise tickets and the proposal was beautiful and the ceremony even more so. He moved in and I let him bring very few of his belongings (hes a hippie). Soon we had twins (0F, 0M) (he stayed home while I worked (my job is not important)) and life was great. Soon the cat got let out the bag and he found out that I knew that he was trying to use me for my brother (who was also in on the situation). He said something about divorce so I threatened to tell everyone every little detail, even that /thing/ he likes. What followed was 8 more months of constant psychological warfare and the best sex I've ever had, until the unthinkable happened.

We actually started to fall for each other. Now I'm not proud, what with the twins and all, but I instantly filed for divorce (i am also a child of divorce, okay, I've got commitment issues and it made it too real, weve all got flaws). He got full custody and I got to return to my bachelor lifestyle. And it. was. MISERABLE. I missed him so much. I missed pissing him off. I missed when he'd get mad and put dairy milk in my coffee to make me sick. I missed the way every time we woke up hed say "morning, my bitch husband who I hate" and id call him sweetie and kiss him on the cheek as he stewed in rage. I even missed the kids!

A couple years (and several rehab admissions, mostly mine) later we ran into each other at some charity event that I don't even remember what was for. I asked him how the twins were doing. He said they were good. He said I was looking well. I returned the compliment. We both had some wine. Next thing I knew, it was morning and we were married again. Now, I know what you're thinking, but he said he missed me too, and yeah he's the only partner I've ever had that's lasted longer than 2 months so maybe I don't have the best history but I really think we can make it work this time!

Tl;dr: AITA for turning my little brothers mortal enemy gay?

Edit: stop asking who I am, none of you know who I am, I am anonymous, that is the point duh

Edit 2: i am not Floyd [lastname]-[lastname2]

Edit 3: I mean it, I am not Floyd. I dont care if the ages and timelines match up

Edit 4: just bc my husband is a hippie doesn't mean he's the only hippie you guys know of

Edit 5: a lot of celebrities have fraternal twins

Edit 6: fuck you guys

[esleep]

i am having the most ridiculously, cartoonishly bad day that i think i have ever had and i am going to be pitiful about it for a minute okay. if you read this i hope it makes your day seem much better by comparison, in fact i am pretty confident it will do that for you. it's probably a little funny also if you are not me.

testimonials: "my jaw fully dropped and stayed open the entire time, jesus christ" -shannon in reply to the 3+ minute rambling video i sent her about all of this.

here is my sordid tale, for those brave of heart and strong of stomach.

i woke up at 4 AM while having both a migraine and an anxiety attack (being around my family for extended periods will do that). i was unable to go back to sleep for multiple hours. my morning work alarm went off less than an hour after i finally drifted back off.

at work i spent 10 hours trying to catch up on a bunch of bullshit, because it was my first day back after a week and a half of hastily-arranged sick leave so i could be with my dying grandfather.

midway through my morning, i remember that last night i found a weird open sore on the back of my cat's neck, which i need to call a vet to get checked out IMMEDIATELY after work since i am supposed to be bringing a kitten home on Sunday and I do not want to bring him into a house full of ringworm or some other weird skin infection.

i start looking around online. looks like the only place anywhere nearby that will accept walk-ins AND is open after i get off work at 6 is the veterinary urgent care across town. cool. i call. they tell me their base exam cost is $110 and any treatments go on top of that. i wince and grimly make an appointment for 7 this evening.

at this point it is around noon and my stomach hurts. it's been hurting this whole time but i had kinda let it fade into the background because i thought it was just part of the anxiety. however it has been getting slowly stronger until it finally dawns on me that i am having period cramps. ten days early. cool and nice. i also do still have the migraine, thank you for asking.

i finish my work day at 6, then remember something crucial: rent. i go to bring my rent check physically to the landlord's office since i got back into town too late to mail it, and my landlord is so old school i can only pay by physical check or money order (online portal? never heard of her). the office is already closed, and they don't have a night drop available right now because their actual office was firebombed six months ago (lmao) and it's still being rebuilt so their temporary "office" is just a trailer. i panic-call my landlord, who says i can leave the check if i can manage to stuff it far enough into the door that no one can see it. i try my best. this takes a million years. the entire time i am worrying that i will be late to the vet.

we finally make it to the appointment. things seem to be going well at first - we are alone in the waiting room while i fill out my paperwork, ivy is mostly chill (shockingly). when we are brought to a room she even lets me feed her a churu through her carrier door, a decision i soon came to deeply regret. we'll get to that.

this is the first vet i've ever been to where they fully take your animal away from the "exam room" where you are supposed to wait and into a back area to examine and treat them, presumably because their protocol is built around much more severe illnesses and traumas. predictably, ivy did not like this very much. i nervously told the tech who took her away that if they had too much trouble with her, they were welcome to come and get me, because she usually behaves more for me than for anyone else. i can hear her yowling from the room where i have been told to wait, while i am staring down a sign that says "FOR YOUR SAFETY - PLEASE STAY HERE WHILE WE EXAMINE YOUR PET". it may be a liability thing for them, idk, but it is truly not my safety i am concerned about at this moment. it's not my cat's safety, either. those yowls are war cries. the beast seeks blood.

the vet comes in. he seems like a nice man. he tells me gently that he's having some trouble getting a good look at the sore because ivy is so upset (you don't say). i tell him i am happy to help them corral her, but also, i have a photo of it on my phone if he would like to look at that. he is delighted. i show him the blurry photo i took last night. he is less delighted. essentially, he tells me, this is most likely either an allergy flare-up, an infection/abscess, or possibly (least likely) ringworm. we agree on a three-pronged approach: one antibiotic shot and one steroid shot tonight, plus a tube of ointment to come home with me that i will apply once or twice a day ("whatever you can manage" he told me while nervously glancing at the door that separates us from my pet demon in the treatment room). this ointment contains more steroid and antibiotic, plus an anti-fungal, and it should help kick whatever is going on even if we can't positively identify it. he says if it gets worse or doesn't heal, or if she develops more of them, bring her back.

next to come in is a slightly wild-eyed vet tech who tells me that ivy has been attacking them all pretty badly (shocking) so they had to net her (okay that's a new one). during this process, she shit liquid diarrhea all over herself and them. after they gave her the necessary injections and tossed her from the net back into the carrier, "the poop went in with her" were the tech's exact words. she handed me a cloth and a spray bottle of disinfectant and basically told me i could stay in here as long as i needed to get the carrier cleaned up, but she couldn't stay in the room to help me because my cat is such a menace to society. that is fine. i would rather face her wrath on my own anyway.

they were not exaggerating when they told me she was absolutely covered in shit. that churu really lubricated the pipes or something because it is a frankly concerning amount of feces. her bed and blanket inside the carrier are beyond redemption. i don't really care too much about that - i've owned cats for two decades, i am wise enough not to keep anything i'm emotionally attached to inside the carrier. i am also not very squeamish about cleaning up a little poop. but what really gets to me this time is the smell. it is absolutely unholy. this is not regular cat shit smell, this is like satan's afterbirth. beyond just what's in the carrier, there is shit matted into ivy's fur all throughout her back half and a little toward the front too. she looks pitiful. but she walks out of the carrier so calmly when i open the door, almost like she's trying to preserve what dignity she can. i don't blame her. she's had a bad night.

i do what i can with the carrier to make it transportable, then go out to pay the staggering $365 that i owe for this ongoing nightmare. it is now nearly 9 pm. we've been here for two hours. i am exhausted like someone who has been to war. the extremely young boy they have running the front desk takes forever to figure out how to apply my Scratchpay (which i had to hastily apply for in the exam room), and meanwhile the smell that is coming off both me and my cat is like nothing i have ever experienced. it's freshly shocking to me every time i inhale. it's the kind of smell you never really acclimate to. i am pretty sure i have actually died and gone to hell without noticing the trip.

i bring the cat home (windows down, by necessity, praying it doesn't start raining again like it has been all day). i take her directly to the bathtub - do not pass go, do not collect $200. then i have the joy and privilege of giving her a bath in the tub. with dish soap. because that is all i have available and this is a bit too much of an emergency for me to doordash some cat shampoo. considering my cat's temperament, this goes about as well as you can imagine. by the end, the cat and i are pretty much equally wet, but at least she is mostly clean. i consider showering myself off while fully clothed, but decide against it for the sake of my bra, which is somehow the only thing still dry and untouched.

i am still a little bit in shock at how absolutely horrendous and LONG every aspect of this day has been. i need a xanax, $10,000 USD, a massage, and a handle of whiskey. i will be receiving none of that. goodnight.

[mangooes]

Chapter 2 - I weep for the Departed

Chapter 1 - All will eventually fall upon the earth

Chapter 3 - Ready for another dance, shadow monarch?

Chapter 4 - Interwined for now, perhaps forever?

Acheron’s pov

“hahh..hahh..” gasps for air was heard as a girl with purple mixed with black hair woke up abruptly. “That dream, or was it a distant memory..?” the girl asked herself with uncertainty. “Pick yourself together, it's your first day of school.” 

Waking up as a kid is a new experience for me. It’s been a long time since I've experienced growth itself.  I learn the ways of growing, I've become used to the terms of school and studying, and human activities that make me feel.. slightly colored. 

As of today, I'm starting my junior high school. I’m currently stuck in a 12 year old’s body as a disguise. In this life, the aeons are kind enough to give me a whole free lifetime where I can do anything and be anyone. With this I started my morning routine which consists of feeding cats, making breakfast, and leaving home for a walk to the school. 

As I started walking down the streets of the neighborhood, people greeted me with their usual smiles, “Morning Mei!” “Good Morning' Mei!” A chorus of greetings comes my way as I return the gesture with a greeting and a nod. In this timeline, people addressed me as “Mei” instead of “Acheron.” Quite a shock huh? People may view "Acheron" as a wierd name, so i settled with the most common name i can think of. As I continued my walk down the street, I noticed something off. A dimensional rift has opened it seems, it’s energy fluctuating all over the place. Of course the humans in this world wouldn’t notice either way. They are just innocent human beings with no strength whatsoever. 

As the girl pondered in her thoughts, she failed to notice a crack right below her, sucking her into the dimensional rift that was opened for a few seconds before turning invisible in the eyes of civilians. 

‘Ugh where am i..?’ the girl stands up after falling for what seems like forever. But the girl isn’t a normal one it seems as she has experienced something far worse. ‘This is the dimensional rift…?’ She looks around with uncertainty, her sword summoned as she holds it firmly ready to unsheath it if anything is bound to happen. 

“What is a mere human doing here?” a creature voiced behind her. The girl turned around to admire the distance between the creature and herself. “Heh and here I thought the Shadow Monarch was the one who would show up, but it’s just a useless human, pathetic. Oh well it would be easy getting rid of you.” the creature smiled sadistically and laughed maniaclly

The girl just stared with an empty look, “Who are you?” as she sighed inwardly. The creature feeling annoyed answered with arrogance. “Are you looking down on me girl? I could kill you in an instant as I the Monarch of Insect!” The girl hums in response as she looks down to her sword holding it’s hilt. 

The Monarch of Insect feeling underestimated rages in anger as attacks of poison were sent in the direction of the said girl. “You dare underestimate me useless human!” as the creature shouts in rage, which turned into pure shock as the girl effortlessly avoid the attacks without batting an eye. 

“Well then I haven't introduced myself haven’t I? The name is Acheron, it’s nice to meet you…Monarch of Insects.” The girl said as she unsheath her sword as colors of purple and black drained from her features turning into red blood and white. “I weep for the departed..” the girl said as the Monarch of Insects stares in shock, for the first time ever feeling scared of the immense  display of power the girl in front of her is showing, she is no ordinary human. “You.! I will never lose to a pesky human!” As the Monarch of Insects sends attacks one after another towards the girl, but it all comes to a failure as the girl draws her sword towards the Monarch, a tear drop of blood was seen on her face. Red blood lightning crackles and strikes like thunder in a raging storm. “May all ends reach nihility.. suffering in eternal emptiness.” As blinding white lights and a shake of the ground impacts the dimensional rift leaving nothing of the Monarch of Insects and a big hole in the middle of their previous battleground.

The girl stands holding her sword, sheathing it again. This time the colors of the girl didn’t return, it stays blood red white as she looks at the sky of the dimensional rifts that pours drops of rain with blood. The girl sighs as she closes her eyes before continuing, “So Monarch of Shadows, with what pleasure do I owe you for showing my presence?” the girl said without looking behind her.

The said Monarch comes out of the shadow, with his armor full of shadow wisps eyeing the girl with a shock expression replaced with longing as the bright glowing purple eyes intensify. "I finally found you again, Acheron.. no or should i say Mei..?" the monarch says with emotions conveying thousands of words as he stares at the same eyes that used to meet his grey and purple ones in the previous timeline. 

i finished a new chapter for this skadnka i dont know how to link it tho ill find a way to do so, anyways i'll start writing for other jinwoo fanfic ideas cuz he needs more fanfics tbh, its either a frieren reader or a robin reader from star rail! i like imagining like such different characters to one dimentions and all so i hope it's not boring errr untill next time! tmrw prob haha any sudgestions for characters are open tho so yep

[honeyandthunderstorms]

hello it is cold as shit where i live and im bored at home so here are some more unhinged asks:

how are we feeling post charlos divorce?

what are you most looking forward to for the 2025 f1 season?

favorite color? least favorite color?

thoughts on january as a month

is 3° Celsius really that cold or am i just a big baby? (i live in a desert ok that's my excuse)

in the ferrari religion, who brings the presents during christmas? the cavallino, charles or enzo ferrari himself?

I will always welcome unhinged asks at any given time so thank you for thinking of me in your time of boredom and coldness 🙂‍↕️

oh god. post charlos divorce actually made me depressed bc while I'm excited for Lewis to Ferrari, I'm on my missing charlos hours still. like I keep seeing how Lewis and Charles’ initials match up and I am crazy about it, but Charles and Carlos’ names were the same just in different languages. sooooo maybe its just something about the destined ferrari teammates, but charlos still has me fucked up bc I LOVED THEM. I loved the toxic arranged marriage vibes bc they gave off the absolute vibes of puppy dog eyes and deep love and care but other times it was so rancid, but i loved it. if I don't get longing gazes from them this year I will probably crash out (or I will get over it and move on)

for Charles to win the wdc (I'm very serious). I am looking forward to his wins and podiums and his absolute giddy smiles when he succeeds. I believe it could be possible this year and I am looking forward to seeing it happen.

PINK. particularly light pinks or pastel pinks, but I'm not very impartial tbf. least fav color? hmmm probably like that muted grey green, close to brown, color. idk how else to describe it except like a murky olive, but olive is actually kinda pretty and this color is not. and no, not brown bc I like brown (brown eyes are my fav color eyes). someone please tell me they understand what I just described

January is meh for me bc I live in a state that's considered hot, but January (& February, sometimes March) is the coldest month here and I actually like the cold. also there's a cold front rn and I'm so happy about it bc I get to cuddle in bed with tons of blankets he he he

I would definitely consider that cold, so you're only a big baby if I'm a big baby as well!!! bc of that cold front here it was 24°F (like -4°C) this morning (its the afternoon now and the temp has raised 20 degrees) and I was very happy when I woke up toasty bc my cat was sleeping on my legs and giving off heat like a furnace 😌

i’d like to believe it’s the ghost of Enzo Ferrari. if he's really giving Santathough, the cavallino is the one pulling the sleigh (or in his case, a little red Ferrari car). he probably gives Charles a lil kiss on his forehead too after dropping off his presents. also, do you think he addresses Charles’ presents to ‘il predestinato’? cuz I do

[zebellehopper]

Shifting log #1

Hello everyone, my name is Marianne and I am a shifter for 4 years, I was pretty much inactive for 3 years after my 1st but now I'm back

So I discovered shifting way back in 2020 on tiktok (lmao not rlly new) but switched to youtube, the only one shifter I trusted on youtube was Kristeau, her videos helped me a lot and her Diabolik lovers story time are funny as hell, I really recommend watching her when you're just starting out

This is a playlist of her videos if you wanna check them out <3

I don't use tiktok as my main source of info about shifting but I use

-Amino (website/app)

-Reddit

-Youtube

Back in 2020, I did try shifting, the first few times (no method, just subliminals), it did not work but I did come close when I felt like floating and itching. There were also instances in the 3 years I wasn't actively trying to shift at all that I felt symptoms like while sleeping, I feel like I'm getting pulled into somewhere but due to me being a scaredy cat, also got occasional sleep paralysis, could not move, only my eyes, I tried my hardest to wake up and woke up in my CR. Its no surprise tho, considering you shift everyday in your life

Warning Ahead: Full of Yapping

Example of that is picking a choice, would you rather eat an egg or eat a bird? If you picked the egg, then you are currently in a reality where you did choose the egg but there is a reality that co-exists with that one wherein you picked to eat the bird. It also reminds me of a video in youtube about a theory about the universe spliting in two and making infinite possibilities every time a choice is made. Interestingly, there is also the butterfly effect wherein a small choice, seemingly insignificant can make something big happen in the future, amazing right?

We also have the Schrödinger's cat wherein there was a 50/50 percent chance the cat inside the box was dead or alive & the only way to know is if you open the box, or to put it more simply, the cat is both dead or alive until you open the box, going back to the parallel universe, there are two realities where the cat is dead and the other one is where its alive. And if we based it on quantum immortality/multiverse theory, there must be a version of you who is alive/dead as well

One more thought hehe, the time ratio thingy (Ex: CR = 1 Year & DR = 5 minutes) we have in our scripts when we shift, it also reminds me of the twin paradox wherein if we have twins that were born at the same time & are the same age and I send one twin to space in a speed of 99.9% light, the twin from space ages slower than the one in earth, twin-from-space's clocks ticks 4.5% as fast as the one on earth, so if twin-from-space comes back to earth after 5 years, he has only aged 5 years older but the one-on-earth twin has already aged 110 years older.

Source:

Sorry for the endless yap about these theories but these kind of topics became interesting to me again recently, especially after playing Life is Strange

Last part, I also saw a little post by someone and it got me thinking. There are people who almost/died, some claim they reincarnated/born again, some claim they saw nothing, just quiet and a black void, some also claim to see heaven/hell (scary tbh.) and I kind of kept wondering if they shifted to somewhere where they assumed they'd end up, depending on their beliefs

I wanna know what everyone thinks! I'm open to any corrections & opinions :)