#this was lovely to read and think about!! thank you again anon
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i have a request for some ✨emotional, pinning smut✨ for viktor x female!reader based on “Crush” by Cigarettes After Sex
like viktor getting so flustered while watching her try on clothes (“i want to watch you as you’re trying on your clothes, and now you’re all i think about when i’m alone”) and him being just so down bad for the reader
and the sexual tension between them is *palpable*
just some good ol friends to lovers pinning, resolved with some smut
please and thank you, i love your writing 🥺🥺🥺🙏🙏🙏🙏
Hi Anon! I loved this request so much you have no idea!
Skin
viktorxfemale!reader explicit! lots of yearning, poor Viktor :v
author’s note: It's exactly what is says in the request. I listened to a lot of Cigarettes After Sex for this and when it began to annoy me switched to Grimes and remembered she had some good stuff going on in 2012, hence her song Skin will fit this as well if you read with music in the background :) @rennethen beta read!
word count: 2,4K
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Viktor is trying to figure out a way to sink further into your armchair, have it swallow him whole—legs, arms, fingers, every single strand of his hair—before he disintegrates into a puddle. He had no idea it was going to be this bad when you said, "Can we just rest instead of studying for once?"
Sure, he could rest. He’s tried resting before. What could go so especially wrong? Other than, say, you deciding to organise your wardrobe on a whim while he’s trying to read. And then, when he finally gives up on reading—because it is physically impossible to keep his eyes anywhere but on glimpses of you dressing and undressing, tossing clothes around—another thing that could happen is you parading around in a T-shirt long enough to hide your underwear, but not long enough to hide your legs. And it’s just for a moment, just to change a song or take a sip of your tea, but it’s enough for him to sink so deep into the chair that he can feel the springs digging into his ass.
Or, say, you stepping out of the wardrobe in an appallingly microscopic mini skirt, asking, "Is this too short? Am I too old to wear things this short?"
Yes, it’s too goddamn short.
"Hmm, maybe a little?" he offers, trying so hard to make it look like you’ve just interrupted his reading. The same sentence, for about the fifteenth time—but he really is reading. So, just a glimpse. Just one look at your thighs, where they inevitably end and something else begins, and the skirt is so, so short he can almost—
"A little too short, or I’m a little too old?" you chuckle, and—God forsake you—you turn, and your ass cheeks peek from underneath, and now he knows you’re wearing a pair of white knickers. Just plain old cotton, but what it does to him. There is almost no chair left for him to squeeze himself into.
"Uh… both?" he offers weakly, not really knowing what he is saying, and you shoot him a look of mock offense.
"Forgive me, clothes are far from my areas of expertise," Viktor says, finding his voice—and finding some strength to look away and focus on the sentence he’s been trying to read forever. And the voice he’s found is nowhere near dignified enough for him to look you in the eye. It’s exasperated and breathy in a way that makes you pause for a moment before you shrug and retreat to the wardrobe, and he can breathe again.
"Expertise or not, you must have an opinion on something, Viktor," your chant reaches him as you shuffle between hangers, pulling out the next number to reconsider—a dress this time.
"Must I? I will remind you, I was lured into a trap with the promise of a study date, which somehow turned into a fashion show." Viktor mutters, shifting in the armchair—his stomach muscles actually ache from being flexed the whole time. All the forced breaths, all the cramps in his lower belly, are giving him such a hard time.
"Trapped? Excuse me, are you being physically restrained?" you ask, stepping out, your arms folded on your chest, having no idea that he actually is. Having no idea that his legs wouldn’t work, that if he were to stand up and leave, he’d have to crawl out instead.
"I am," he states bravely. "Weighed down by the sheer gravity of this experience." And you smile, thinking that he jests, but he really doesn’t.
Viktor looks at you in your silly dress, his face burning even hotter, lids heavy from all the warmth pooling inside him. He swallows, and you mistake the struggle for restraint as mockery.
"Oh, sod off," you cackle at the look on his face and step back inside, deciding you’ll keep the dress. "You're free to study if you want, you poor soul."
"Thank you, merciful creature," Viktor grits through his teeth, now carefully studying the letters in that one goddamn sentence he’s been trying to read for the past half hour. He’s never felt less free to do anything.
Finally, he admits defeat and puts the book aside. He takes a sip of his tea—now cold—and thank God for something cold in his mouth, because his tongue is a piece of burning coal. Stretching his legs in front of the chair, he surrenders to this slow, exquisite torture: watching you try on skin after skin, none of them particularly vulgar or filthy, but the sheer thought of you being nearly naked just a wall away makes something writhe inside him. Once in a while, he catches vignettes—an arm, a bra strap, a thigh, a little bit of bum as you lean over to pick something up.
And he would have done something a long time ago, but you are such good friends. It would be a real pity to complicate things. So he bears it—all of it. Every accidental touch, every fleeting glance, and allows himself to wonder sometimes, when your face dusts pink around him, if it's really his doing or just circumstantial evidence. If your pupils dilating at his lousy compliments mean something, or if you simply like to be praised. If you invite him over for his exceptional conversational skills. And if yes, he wonders how disappointed you must be today, as all he’s given you are quiet grunts and chuckles to cover how close he is to being absolutely ruined.
His skin is still burning when you step out again, this time wearing just a long sweater, and even that does something to him. You lean over him to press next on the music player, and Viktor catches a whiff of your scent, forcing his eyes not to roll back. He fails, so keeps them clamped shut.
"Is this also undergoing the purge?" he asks, clutching at straws, desperate to redirect his thoughts to any other thing in the universe but your skin under his fingers.
"I don’t know, you tell me." You pause mid-rise, face suddenly close to his. He blinks slowly, and you make nothing of it. His pupils are blown wide, lips parted, but you make nothing of it—just wait for him to reply.
"You must have an opinion," you press, and it feels like you are pressing on his chest, forcing the answer out of him.
"I like the sweater," Viktor whispers, taking the sleeve hem between his fingers. His skin brushes yours. "I like all of your clothes, actually." A confession finally escapes him, voice barely there as something sparks between the contact. And suddenly, you're no longer talking about clothes.
You glance at his eyelashes—long and dark, boyish and shy as his eyes move between two points: your wrist and his fingers.
"This one… is nice," he swallows, accent cutting his words into whispers. He can’t help it. He indulges—just once—in the light brush of his thumb across your wrist, where the skin is so thin he can feel the stutter of your heartbeat.
And you are aware of what’s happening in your chest. But you feel less embarrassed once you spot the similar rhythm pulsing through the vein on Viktor’s neck. And you tell yourself you are only checking if his heart is beating equally fast to yours, not staring. You tell yourself that while staring at the column of his throat and imagining how your tongue would fit in there. How Viktor would lean his head back and sigh if you pressed your lips to this tiny point where his heart echoed.
With you frozen, hovering over him, Viktor doesn’t exactly indulge further—but his hand moves outside of the jurisdiction of his will, fingers wrapping around your wrist. Once his suspicion is confirmed, though, he moves with intent. His fingers slip beneath the sleeve, caressing your forearm before sliding back down, memorising the shape of your knuckles. Your hands are so cold against his, burning, but it’s not the hottest thing you’ve felt yet.
Gently, carefully, he lifts your hand and holds it close to his mouth, palm facing him. His lips barely press against your wrist, and you exhale, your breath visible in the movement of his hair. Still frozen, you close your eyes as Viktor’s mouth travels up your palm, your nails grazing beneath his ear, goosebumps rising along his neck in response. Your fingertips catch on the plush of his lips before he sucks them into his mouth—his tongue hot, hotter than even his touch, swirling over your index finger. You can feel the edge of his teeth against your skin, and your forehead presses against his as you pathetically moan out his name.
The moment the silence is broken, he stops, and it takes everything in you not to whine. He chuckles out a nervous sound but doesn’t let go of your hand.
You decide you owe him the next move. Slowly—so painfully slowly—you shift in front of him, sinking onto your knees on either side of his thighs, still hovering just above him as you weigh the moment, wondering if shoving your fingers into his mouth was enough of an invitation.
Viktor’s hands answer for him. They slide up your legs, thumbs hooking over your hips to press you down onto him, and he groans at the contact. He squeezes, despite himself, looking drunk on the sensation of your core pressing against his, both of you sinking into the tight embrace of the chair. Your arms wrap around his neck, fingers tangling into his hair, and Viktor gasps, „Oh, God.” His eyes remain closed.
Your fingers on his scalp are almost enough to have him undone, as his hips buck up and you follow his cry with a less dignified, “Oh, fuck,” catching on his lips.
"Please say something," a plea escapes him on an exhale, eyes still hooded, as if opening them could shatter the moment.
Instead, you press your lips to his—a light, hesitant touch at first. Viktor startles, and for a moment, you both just breathe into each other’s mouths. Then, as if something clicks into place in his mind, Viktor moves his tongue. Licks your upper lip, tentative, before his hands slide up your sides—one wrapping around your waist, the other gripping your neck as he pulls you deeper into the kiss.
His mouth claims yours, firm, almost bruising, and he catches up on breathing through his nose. Thumb stretches out your cheek and when you part, it’s only for an inch. He finally looks at you and you whisper, “Something.”
Faces close to each other, foreheads touching, you wordlessly reach for his belt and Viktor’s eyes follow the movement of your fingers. You tug on his pants to slide them down his hips and take in the vision of his cock, outlined in his boxer briefs, throbbing and leaking, a patch of wet cotton sticking to the head.
He grabs your hips, slides them over himself and you both moan as your wet underwear meets his. Hands everywhere on you, under your sweater, on your ass, as if Viktor can’t decide where he wants to touch you the most. His lips find your neck and your spine arches, your cunt pressing firmer on his cock. You feel his breath coming in hot pants with each movement, his tongue swiping along your neck, lips sucking hickeys into your skin.
He tugs at your jumper and with no words said, you lift your arms to help him rid you of it and do the same with his layers, baring his chest. You kiss his clavicle, and Viktor can’t help but whimper at the feeling of your hot mouth against him.
His fingers hover over your back, a silent question about your bra but before you can nod or say anything, you undo it with one flick and Viktor’s lips are on you immediately. On your breasts, on your nipples, just frantically licking and nipping before his tongue travels back up, tracing a slick line through your sternum, your neck, chin and lands back in your mouth.
He pushes you closer to him, your chests meet, and you sigh at the feeling of his heartbeat next to yours. You kiss him and between kisses Viktor breathes, “God, you are so wet.”
“You are so wet too,” you reply, and he chuckles. You rub against each other, your hips rolling on top of his and he hides his face in your neck, forcing himself not to come before you. You wrap your arms back around him, mouth hanging open against his forehead, his hair tickling your face. One, two more rolls of your hips, two more rubs against his clothed cock and you come twitching, pressing his face into your throat, with a force that could snap his neck, and he both feels the moan vibrating in your larynx and hears it ringing in his ears.
Not letting you go, he ruts into you, sliding his cock between your sore, swollen lips, soon to join you with your name falling from his mouth in a quiet broken whimper, muffled with a bite on your neck and you can feel the wetness spreading between your legs, hot and sticky as your underwear merges into one mess of cum. You both breathe heavily, stay embraced before looking at each other.
When Viktor shivers beneath you, you suddenly remember that you might be crushing him and wince, asking “Am I hurting your leg?”
“No, God, no,” he mutters into the pool between your collar bones and his breath is still so warm. His palm is splayed on the nape of your neck, heavy and firm, other encircles your waist. You comb his hair away from his forehead and look at him firmly. “So… fashions shows. Not so bad in the end, huh?”
He cackles, caught off guard. “Not so bad, no,” he muses, looking you deep in the eyes. Spent, happy, cheeks pink and hair tussled, he looks so pretty it takes everything in you to not smooch him in another kiss. “I might want to frequent those more often,” he says bashfully, and you smile.
“Oh, there is a lot to be seen. I haven’t even begun with the underwear drawer,” you whisper against his lips and kiss him softly and to Viktor it’s abundantly clear, that he will have to crawl out of here were he ever going to leave.
#viktor arcane#viktor x reader#viktor fanfic#viktor x reader smut#viktor x f!reader#arcane#viktor smut#arcane fanfic#my writing#ao3#ao3 fanfic#viktor x oc#viktor nation#request#viktor x gn!reader#viktor fluff#viktor x reader fluff
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Saint Valentine
You watch as your Word Bearer, Aziel, and his group go down to the basement for their regular ritual. Little did you know they were planning to summon someone to ask for some odd advice.
Author’s Note: I have a Word Bearer OC now!
Tagged: @shadowfirecat , @kit-williams , @bleedingichorhearts , @barn-anon , @gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan
@sleepyfan-blog , @bispecsual , @c-u-c-koo-4-40k , @ms--lobotomy
@gra93fruit-blog , @i-am-a-dragon34 , @felinisnoctis, @thevoidscreams, @yurihasurunbara
God love him, Aziel is very helpful and loyal (daresay a somewhat like a dog), and is a wonderful hype-man, but sometimes he can get a bit absurd and uncomfortably zealous about it. Not to mention him trying to convert you to believing the Four, whoever they are. You’re not particularly religious, but you’re of the opinion people can believe whatever they want to so as long as it doesn’t hurt others. You can take only so much chatter of worship of you and his gods after all. It got to the point you had to tell him to cut down the words of praise and worship lest you think he is being insincere. He was rather insulted by the fact that you questioned his sincerity for you, but he made an effort to not do that as much. His nicknames, however, never stopped.
You figured all this may be due to his loneliness and the lack of company of his peers, so you were relieved when Aziel found a group of Word Bearers to hang out with. Better for him to go out and socialize rather than pour all his focus on you. It wouldn’t do him much good to have too much of a codependent relationship with you.
Them together were an odd bunch, they all seem to look so different! Some seem to be living armor, while others, like Aziel, have more human like forms but with horns protruding from their head, looking the living embodiments of demons or monsters. They visited weekly, typically to discuss their own theological literature from what little you can understand in gothic, pray, and chant. It seemed no different than the Sunday worship that your christian friend took you to once. Sometimes listening to their chanting puts you to sleep at night.
Today’s visit was the same. The Word Bearers passed by with a nod or a wave as they made their way down to the basement as usual. You looked at your own Astartes carrying a box in his arms. Curious, you asked him, “What do you have in there?”
“Items for our ritual, my darling goddess.”
You couldn’t help but blush at his pet names, but frown at the mention of a ritual, “Please tell me that a half-decomposed animal carcass is not part of it.” the memory of a decomposing deer carcass that stunk up the house for several days made you want to wretch. Where did Aziel acquire such a thing any way? You wonder.
Aziel nuzzled you and reassuringly replied, “I promise it is nothing of that sort.”
Your shoulders sagged with relief and turned to start filling the kettle, “The usual for you guys?”
“Yes. Thank you, my radiant light.” The Word Bearer leaned down and kissed your temple. You giggled and smiled at him, “You’re welcome. You go ahead, tea and mocha will be ready up here when you’re done.”
Aziel purred as he nuzzled you again then left. You started to brew very strong coffee. You stuffed the massive tea strainer full with rooibos tea mixture, set out honey, a large tin of powder hot chocolate, and a jar of dried chili flakes. They had a preference for sweet and strongly flavored drinks given how much they enjoyed the mocha you made. Aziel and his friends would take a while and when they start their ending chants, it would be the perfect time to boil water.
You were reading a novel on your tablet when a cloying smoky scent filled your nostrils as if something was baked way too long. Was something burning? Smoke billowed out when you opened the door to the basement.
“Aziel?” You called out worriedly.
You coughed and waved the smoke away from your face. Concerned and forgetting that your Astartes could withstand a lot more than the average human, you rushed downstairs.
“We summon you, St. Valentine!”
You paused when you heard them say the name “St. Valentine”, catching on that they were trying to summon something or someone. When the smoke cleared, you were left standing awkwardly on the stairs, the group of Word Bearers staring at you, all positioned around a summoning circle drawn with what you hope was red paint. Three of them were kneeling in prayer, one was holding a book aloft, and another one was swinging an incense burner pouring with smoke. Aziel stood in front of them as if directing the entire ritual. A heart shaped box of chocolates and a bouquet of red roses laid in the middle. It was clear the St. Valentine they were trying to summon was the St. Valentine of Valentine’s Day. Not that it did anything.
“Sorry… Aziel. I… I thought… something was burning.” You stuttered in embarrassment, quickly turning to go back upstairs, “I’ll go, sorry I interrupted you.”
Suddenly, you felt yourself falling forward into an armoured embrace.
“Don’t leave. Please, my guiding star.” Aziel rubbed his face against your hair like a cat seeking affection.
“But don’t you have to finish the ritual?”
His grip tightened, scared that you would disappear if he let go, “We are finished, but the ritual was not successful.” He mumbled.
You felt bad for breaking their focus at such a critical moment thus contributing to their failure, “I’m sorry…” you started.
As if he knew already what you’re going to say, Aziel reassured you, “You have no fault in this. It is much more difficult to summon anything in ancient Terra. Do not fret.”
His fire-patterned eyes held a glimmer of humour and something else as you looked at him, “We summoned you after all.” he chuckled.
You snorted and laughed, “I don’t think that counts. Why are you guys trying to summon St. Valentine?”
“We wish to ask for his wisdom in properly courting our bonded.” Aziel replied earnestly.
Your mouth dropped open. Heat spread across your face and your heart skipped a few beats. You stammered, “You… I… um… you want to court me?” Aziel was very devoted to you and at times a little too devoted, but you thought it was just the way he was as a Word Bearer. Never in your wildest imagination did you think that Aziel had feelings for you to the point he would try to summon St. Valentine to ask for advice. It was a lot to take in. Perhaps you’ll take the lead and rein back Aziel a bit, knowing how gungho he could get
The fact that his buddies went along with him to do so just made the situation even more ridiculous. You laughed and reached to rubbed the smudge of dirt off the base of one of his horns. Purring loudly, Aziel leaned into your touch. You then cupped his face with your hands stroking the scarified mark on his left cheek, “I am very flattered. But…”
Aziel’s face fell.
His face brightened once again when you pecked his nose with a quick kiss, “You silly man. I was about to say let’s talk about how I want to be courted and we can go from there.”
If your Word Bearer had a tail, he would be wagging it in happy excitement, “You are saying ‘Yes’?” he asked.
“Yes. Now, go clean up and bring the chocolate and flowers up with you. Then we’ll chat. I’m sure it will help your brothers as well.”
Aziel gently pressed his lips against yours, “Of course, my lovely moon lily.” before releasing you from his grasp.
#warhammer 40k#space marine husbandry#space marine husbandry sentience#reader insert#word bearers#oc: aziel#space marine x reader#adeptus astartes x reader
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We seriously need more GBA related fics so here it goes- I NEED a fluff fic where Hipswitch finally finds out Karmor likes him.
I have a small scenario suggestion, but feel free to indulge in creative ideas of your own!
-> The gang go out on a little event, kinda like a rodeo for bounty hunters and cowboys and such(ever watched Helluva Boss? Imagine that one EP of the harvest moon festival). After the games and events are settled, all of the participants engage in a salon dance thingie as well as free drinks, just a silly little after event for everyone to relax and enjoy some socializing.
Hipswitch decides to not participate since he didn't know anyone in the rodeo, and also bcs the owners of the small bar in there weren't particularly fond of Obscurans(even if there were some in the rodeo). But then Karmor/Partner comes along and asks Hipswitch to dance with him, which he's surprised.
He tries to talk Partner out of inviting him and tries to convince him to look for a more "organic" partner instead, but Karmor refuses. So they go to dance and from there you may decide how Hipswitch finally persuade his own feelings for Karmor :D
I did however really want to bring out the fact that Hipswitch is afraid to love, since he probably doesn't think he's worthy of such a thing. And seeing Karmor loving him just...y'know?🥺💞 <- I'm very normal about them(lie)
Sorry for the ramble! Again, feel free to do what you wish!! 🩷
- 🌟
Awe thanks for the request, 🌟. It's so cute :D absolutely twin I'm so normal about them (LIES)
Twistin' and Turnin'
I LOVE THIS REQUEST. Gods I hope Mr crazy man GBA sees this and makes this anon request an episode of sorts, I'd give him my first born
Fluff
QUICK NOTE BEFORE WE START! if you haven't watched BvZ (go do it now) Karmor/Partner is mute and for the most part, in my head, communicates in sign language and big facial expressions. (Also I headcanon him as autistic because I am so he is too)
𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .
Almost (Sweet Music) by Hozier ↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺
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Big day. Or at least that's how Albus had been sarcastically saying all day. Apparently the boys had found out about some rodeo that was coming to town and as a joke both Albus— the bastard— had made the executive decision, that the other three didn't get a say in, that they were going for the shits and giggles.
Karmor tried his damn hardest to tell him that he'd much rather stay in one place, that he wanted to stay home and read, but he'd got the other two on their sides and it's a lot easier to ignore hands then it is to ignore a voice
▄︻デ══━一
"they got free drinks" Albus whistled as they walked around, the events were beginning to settle and Karmor kept dragging Hipswitch and Albus away from the games to prevent a dick measuring contest from starting.
"not a single one of us should be drinking" Karmor signed. He'd gotten better at signing quickly, mostly to combat Albus' quick mind. "And anyways Hipswitch can't drink"
"come on partner, I'm sure you wouldn't mind a drink or two" Hipswitch's southern accent made Karmor melt, it always did. It was far less harsh than Albus and Attila's voices, and more solid than Mahatma's.
"dancing maybe, drinking no, Albus is just going to get wasted and—" he looked at his hands, trying to remember the sign for "annoying". He ran through a few signs before just flipping off Albus in frustration, for a normally calm and sweet person Karmor was easily annoyed by inconveniences like forgetting.
▄︻デ══━一
Karmor stared longingly at the crowd of people dancing their hearts out, Kissing the people they love, singing their voices away. He'd never been good with his confidence, so he was struggling to ask the Obscuran at his side to dance.
He didn't have the words, literally and figuratively, and couldn't get Hipswitch to look at him. Maybe he was just—
"Partner, are you alright?" Hipswitch lightly poked Karmor's arm, scaring the living daylights out of him and causing him to fall out of the chair he was sitting in— knees up to his chest and the only thing touching the seat of the chair being his feet, obviously, so he was already unstable.
He got up quickly, nodding and sitting back down, before standing up again and forcing down all the nerves that bubbled up his throat and through his skin. "Dance with me." it was supposed to be a question, but it didn't seem like it was
"What?" The other man laughed "dance with ya? Partner, I'm not too sure I'm the greatest to dance with, you might want someone more... Organic, for that." He tried to de-sway the man from the idea, but Karmor is stubborn.
"dance with me" it was obvious he wasn't taking no for an answer.
Hipswitch sighed, his metal man's coming up to ruffle the mute man's hair "don't say I didn't warn ya" he said it like he had no choice in it— which was a lie, he could've said no, but Karmor would start sulking and wouldn't do anything else.
Hipswitch could've stayed there all day; Karmor's hand in his and the biggest smile on his face as he dragged him to the very edges of the dance floor.
But of course the second his foot hit the dance floor a partner song blasted through the pavilion, one of those slow ones reserved for couples and families. But Hipswitch agreed and he wanted nothing more than to make Karmor keep smiling.
"I'm gonna step on your toes" he warned, but Karmor only shook his head no, tapping the rhythm into Hipswitch's back.
Karmor's eyes were everywhere but Hipswitch, as it was so unbearably difficult to hold eyes contact with someone you liked.
Hipswitch always noticed that, and he'd ask about it but it would make Karmor let go of him and he'd already sunk into the warm metal man. Once he was attached it was hard to get him off, proven most by if you put the perpetually cold man in a warm bed, you wouldn't be able to get him out without luring him with Hipswitch and food.
A few girls had asked Karmor to dance, but just shook his head and signed "I'm not good company" or "I can't dance"
There was another thing, he always needed Hip— oh. OH.
The realization hit him like a run of bricks. Albus wasn't just playing with him, right? Whump— Karmor— Partner was always looking for Hipswitch, he was always near him, was what that what Albus was talking about
He took a moment to think, the feeling of the human's fingers tapping something into his back. It was a Rhythm of something no one knew, not even Karmor knew himself.
"Partner... I have a question" he looked down at the human. His eyes were on him expectantly. "Albus has been... Sayin' stuff, I want to know if they're true."
Karmor looked nervous, guilty, and his face was 6 times more red than before. He nodded, and had Hipswitch lead them out of the crowd. He longed to be back in it, no matter how loud crowds were, he enjoyed that.
"what has he been saying?" Damn Albus and his loud mouth.
"he's been saying..." It took Hipswitch a moment to form the words, mostly because he could ruin everything up to this and because of Karmor's unwavering stare. "Things about you likin' me"
Karmor wanted to run, to scream, to cry, to kill himself— but his voice was so shot that he can't really scream well and his hand was still in Hipswitch's so the other options weren't on the table
"and if they're true?"
"I wouldn't mind"
Karmor's eyes lit up, he thought that he was gonna have to take Hipswitch's gun and shoot himself, but he didn't! Hurray!
"it's true I like—" he stopped, he felt like a kid again, even if he didn't remember what that was like for him. Like felt too childish, to compare what he felt to just like was a crime, it was wrong
"I love you" Karmor's eyes squeezed shut, he couldn't open them. what if Hipswitch looked uncomfortable or disgusted.
Karmor was startled by arms wrapping him in an embrace. He started crying, he didn't know why he just did.
"I love you too"
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A/N. Sorry if this is all over the place, I'm not too good at writing and I actually haven't gotten to the most recent episode of BvZ yet because each episode is like an hour long and I end up passing out during them.
#good boy audios#gba bvz#gba bastards vs zombies#gba#gba karmor#gba albus#gba attila#gba mahatma#gba hipswitch#gba partner#good boy audios bvz#please make this request an episode#this anon is on to smt
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yoyoyoyo what if this time it’s reader who is a werewolf? and reader is with jackie, jackie doesn’t know until eventually she finds out because they panick and tell her. she is a little apprehensive but then she warms up to it. eventually she gets used to all of it, reader’s body heat, how they can retract their teeth, the way their eye colour changes. and in the bedroom? she wants to hear them growl in her hair and go absolutely primal as she gets strapped down just bc she’s a lovely pillow princess bunny. if it can be sweet and smutty that’d be awesomeee also keep up the good work ur writing is amazing ;)
-🫳
Hello new anon! Thank you for your request and encouragment! It's what keeps my blog going!
Contents: genderneutral reader, adult timeline Jackie, strap can be read as dick,smut.
The blood stuck to your skin like dried concrete; the smell of iron, which was so delicious before, now stanks and sticks to your bathroom walls, making the whole place smell like a butcher shop. You are lucky that today she's not home, having gone to meet up with her old soccer team from highschool. You are sure she would leave you instantly if she saw you like this, and would probably call the cops on you. You wouldn't blame her.
Keeping that secret of yours from your lovely girlfriend has proved to be a harder task than you had thought.
You scrub away at your skin with hot water and soap, resigning to tweeze out the bigger chunks with your fingers. When all is done, you find scratches on your skin, probably left from the struggle. Without a doubt, Jackie will ask you about them, and you will have a hard time explaining their source.
"A cat attacked me" or "I fell off the stairs" doesn't work anymore on her. And, if it happens one more time, she might start to think you are somehow cheating on her. With a sigh, you apply some concealer where the scars are, and hope for the best.
Jackie would take some time to get adjusted to all of...this. Now that your secret is out, you can let loose all those traits that you had suppressed in front of Jackie; and while she finds some of them cute, she's not a fan of others. She's especially not a fan of your shedding, having to clean for at least an hour after your transformation, with you looking and whining at her like a guilty puppy.
Looking at yourself in the mirror, nothing seems out of the ordinary. Good, you think. You clean the bathroom off of the countless of hair left from your shedding. The amount is probably enough to make a pelt out off. After a strenuous three hours, you are finally done, not a trace of hair left on the floor.
Now that that's taken care of, you can take a breath of relief.
But you can't help but wonder, what will you do when the full moon comes?
You, as reckless as ever, agreed to an indoor date with Jackie, not realizing that the moon would be full that night. You could try to make an excuse, but on the other hand, you could not say 'no' to her; she had a far too tight hold on your heart for you to deny her. You'll just have to tell her.
On the couch, with her head resting on your shoulder, Jackie doesn't seem to pick up on your weird vibe. You gulp down your fears, breathing through your nose before whispering to her "Jackie... I..." but you can feel the transformation getting a hold of you as soon as you speak. As your canines become too big, your nails too long and your body too large, you break out, escaping from the window and leaving Jackie behind.
Some time passess before you see her again. You had remained confined to the parks and green areas of Wisayok, moving only during the darkest hours, when no one was around; stress so heavy that you remained in your wolf form for several days.
The only reason Jackie found you, was because rumors had it that there was something roaming in town, and she, as usual, just picked herself up and acted with her guts rather than her brain. It took her a while to convince you to go back home with her: you were far too scared to know what she really thought of you. But as everyone around her always thought, her charisma would take her far, and you were back in her arms again.
But she can get through some things. Like, for example, your body heat. You had always avoided sleeping with Jackie too much, fleeing the aftermath of your lovemaking as soon as you possibly could. She never understood why, but as the heat from your body literally starts to suffocate her, she can take a guess. She has to admit that the first times she saw your canines grow when you were having a fight, or your eyes changing colour while on going the transformation freaked her out.
What she can get used to, is the power dynamic that plays in the bedroom. "Come on... please?" she has been nagging you on and on about this for half an hour by now; and having her arms draped over your shoulders while she tries to egg you on while you're studying, really doesn't help your case. "Okay... if I do it, will you promise to shut up later?" she jumps up on your lap, those eyes of her boring into yours with a heat that could melt you.
"Fuck!", she screams as you dick her down, her legs keeping your hips close to her. Despite the thickness of your wolf skin, you can still feel Jackie's nails leaving moon shaped dents on you. She trashes in your grasp, moving her hips in tandem with yours.
She pleads you to go faster, to fuck her properly; but you are too scared to hurt her, so you resign to going at a slow pace.
You didn’t know how far Jackie was willing to go to get what she wanted.
"What, can't do it?" she breathlessly asks. You can feel a building sense of annoyance in your stomach. You shouldn't listen to her. You know how she gets-.
"I... I should have known" there it is. You try to not let her words affect your impulses. You were already having a hard time controlling yourself and she's just egging you on.
The dirty glimmer in her eyes is the only clue you get, before she reaches for your ear and whispers.
"You know who would take care of me? Shauna".
Fuck it.
In a matter of seconds, you have left Jackie's pussy and rolled her over, pushing her upper body down on the mattress, slamming into her with every thrust.
She brought this to herself.
Did she want to see you at your worst? Wanted to see you at your most primal state, wanted you to treat her like the slut she was?
Well, she could fucking have it.
And Jackie? Oh she's absolutely loving this. She wants nothing more than to be taken by you, to feel your cock move inside of her, to hear you groan in her hair every time you speared her down.
Every thrust builds her up toward her own orgasm, tingling her body with pleasure. She couldn't help it, and yet she had only lasted a couple of minutes. She can feel incredibly close, but she needs a little incentive, and in this position, she can't reach her clit.
"S-shauna would fuck me harder" and that does it. You take her by her hips and drive into her so hard and good, that Jackie cums right away, eyes rolling into the back of her head as she screams her peak away. You don't stop until your legs get tired, and by the looks of it, once they do, Jackie had cummed several times, your cock wet with her release.
"Hey Jax..." Jackie is so out of it that she doesn't even answer you, just humms into the pillow, too fucked out to make a coherent sentence. "Are you okay?" you think you might have fucked her a little too good. The skin of her shoulder is red, her pussy clenching repeatedly as you speak to her.
"Hmmm".
You spend several minutes cleaning her up with a towel, giving her water and massaging her sore spots
When you are done, you get in bed with her, kissing her goodnight.
And Jackie thinks that maybe, she likes gentle you better.
But she's sooo gonna get dicked down as soon as possible.
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that thing about the chapters makes total sense yeah! i liked hearing you break down the themes and realisations etc, it's nice to hear meaty info about the creative process and undercurrents in the work alongside the jokier interactive posts you guys usually make!
and we are both aware that we could probably cut certain scenes or events out, but we also are very adamant about maintaining a pace that feels realistic and makes sense, which usually leads to those higher word counts 😙
the word count splitting absolutely makes sense then, too - two halves of a whole. i'm surprised people have complained about wanting you to cut down on actual scenes for word count purposes... i wouldnt want to lose action or scenes themselves! maybe they meant more brevity or succintness? not repeating things that don't add to the narrative as much, etc. because the dialogue between characters is the most exciting part, as it usually is in storytelling! its happening NOW, we're IN IT with these characters, its so compelling compared to description or that famous bane of writers' lives: long recountings of events that happened previously or 'offscreen'.
please don't cut out action scenes and dialogue - i'm thinking of how my heart picked up when mike was waiting for will to get the sparklers, that tension was so well played... and also the final scene of 10.2, how fast mike's realisations moved as he kissed will into the sand. a vast contrast to how long it took to get there - so perhaps your stylistic choice is to slow the pace and draw out that delicious tension by making characters very pedantic and introspective rather than by adding more external action, dialogue, or obstacles that prevent them getting where they want to go. mike and will ARE their own biggest obstacles, it seems. and perhaps this is the vibe you wanted to create; it makes for a story that really feeds into the cloyingness of being stuck in your head and being stuck in one place - camp - no matter how much the boys both love it. the camp itself becomes a crucible for the story, giving the reader themselves something of the same claustrophobic feeling mike and will must have. very meta!
i’m so glad that helped clear things up from our perspective! we like to largely let the fic speak for itself obviously, so we usually refrain from flat out saying what the intention behind certain decisions was, but in the context of asks like this and the og regarding chapter/overall fic structure, it did seem fitting to clarify the purposes of chapters 9 and 10 more specifically so i’m glad everything makes sense! sorry for the absolute beast of an answer that’s going to follow, except for i’m not. teehee
regarding the word count, i don’t think we’ve been told outright that we should cut down on certain scenes to keep the wc lower, aside from maybeeee a comment or two that i can remember remarking on us over-describing or over-narrating things? which is probably true at times but also honestly that’s just me n thea’s writing style, so if there is something really egregious we will likely catch it while editing and otherwise we’ll just let it slide 🤷🏽♀️ overall though, i feel like it’s more of an implied thing — since we talk often about chapters taking longer to get out due to our typical 20-30k count, i’m sure a few people have wondered why we choose to include all of the interactions and details that we do. thea did actually give me the push i needed to take out an almost 2k chunk that we both loved but agreed was a little clunky and unnecessary in the context of what was happening, and its removal wasn’t detracting from any characters or relationships or worldbuilding in the chapter. so there are definitely times that we do decide something isn’t important enough to tack on a couple thousand extra words, and we will rectify that when possible!
this also brings me to your point about Long Recountings of Offscreen Events — that’s also something we try really hard to avoid, and when we do want to recount something that happened in the past or offscreen, as is natural for basically every story, we do try to make it feel natural and in the moment, like a character is simply remembering or thinking about something instead of trying to catch the reader up to present day. i LOVEE writing dialogue, maybe too much (i added almost all of the 1700ish words i deleted back again with dialogue. oops) but i completely agree with you in that the In The Moment-ness of it all is what’s most compelling to me as well — writing their reactions as they happen, or adding distinctive mannerisms and thoughts and motions while two or more characters speak.,, ougghh it makes my brain vibrate. but of course you need narration and descriptions to fill in those gaps, and i hope our efforts come off as at least somewhat successful! and for the most part, fleshing out the characters and the story and setting as much as possible is just as key to us as the Byler Moments are — if we wanted to focus on only every interaction mike and will had with each other while tabling those with the rest of the party, background/original characters, or the setting of camp as a whole, we would write a much different (and much shorter) fic instead :-)
finally, about 10.2 specifically: THANK YOU SOOOOOO MUCH WHDBHDHDGDJ <- me blubbering with happiness FRRR. thea can tell you firsthand that i spent many weeks banging my head against my desk trying to hammer out the entirety of the bonfire scene and its transitions — it was particularly tricky for me to try and balance general pacing with the inclusion of other characters And having everything lead up to the final moments, so i’m so so so glad it was a good read and that everything felt fitting and intentional because it was definitely meant to be! thea mentioned this in the last ask but will in ch09 gets kind of bowled over by his realization moment all at once, whereas mike kind of has two separate ones — one in 10.1, and one at the end of 10.2, both helping him come to terms with similar but different aspects of his romantic feelings and processing them and moving forward — and i didn’t want them to feel like the same moment happening twice (past a certain obvious degree).
they definitely are their own worst obstacles, especially in a modern au that takes away a good amount (but definitely not all!) of the canon universe pressure of comphet and sexuality and conformation. i know this is a big reason people tend to shy away from modern aus in this fandom, because it’s true that the source material is pretty heavy on these themes, and i have my thoughts on this that i’ll probably expand on soon, but to me, in doing so, it’s kind of a really fun exercise in fleshing out their internal struggles and playing off of those more, if that makes sense: their shared stubbornness, self-repression, reactivity and emotional tendencies, etc, but also the fact that they are very kind, generous, and loyal characters who, at least in the context of acswy, are more scared of being hurt by each other or themselves than they are actually invested in “hating” each other. and you bring up an excellent point as well, probably something that has been more of a subconscious but known goal for us than something we are On Purpose trying to get across: everything is happening in one location during one part of the year for a reason! they’ve had good memories here and bad, both in regards to each other and their friendship and otherwise, and are drawn to coming back every summer just as much as they are each other. with the brief exception of ch09 (although the context of it is a Rare Day Away From Camp, so the idea is still there lol), the emotional journey of the mainline fic very much plays out in the same place to try and convey that.
sorry for the essay long answer to your long ask in response to a long answer in response to a long ask — it’s just very very fulfilling to know that people are noticing our choices and the reasons behind them when we make so many of them intentionally! thank you again and i’m soooo so so glad you enjoyed 10.2 🥳🥳🥳
#took me my entire lunch break to type this out on mobile#worth it#if thea has any additional thoughts she can just edit this whenever#and also sorry for going on like 17 small tangents but unfortunately i have thoughts and you’ve given me#an outlet for them so. HA#this was lovely to read and think about!! thank you again anon#asks#acswy spoilers#<- obviously#ch10
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Eichi gives away the mask so easily because it was never meant to be an "engagement ring" like you delulu wataeis imagined it to be lmao. It was wataru saying that he will continue playing tsumugi clown role in fine and won't leave it for hokuto's mother troupe after graduation. Do you dumb fucks even read the stories? Eichi didn't even understand tf that mask meant when wataru gave it to him and wataru referenced fucking tsumugi in his "proporsal". I dunno why the f you think it's ok to lie about "! EnDiNG wItH wAtAeI EnGaGeMEnT" when the chapter it happened wasn't even close to the end of ep:link. Cope
PS: how do you live with the fact that Eichi clearly admitted to never being in love in his life and Wataru said that even though Eichi likes him, he still can easily discard him for the sake of his objectives?
I love you anon thank you for giving me a nice reason to ramble again beautiful ask 10/10 I'm sorry this is probably not how you hoped this would go but this is such a funny block of text delightful really thank you for the enrichment please marry me
But okay yes now to get down to the actual ask just to disclaim I am solely relying on translations seeing as I do not speak japanese well enough to understant the original text so if anyone has anything to add to this or to correct me on please feel free to do so.
Now to get started I'm not sure if one could say Eichi gave away the mask "So easily" seeing as he claimed that it was "a hard choice to make"? Which, as one might know, implies unease with an idea and pondering and debating and a general amount of thinking behind a decision so? I know this isn't really the main focus of this ask but I'm just a tad miffed with the semantics of it is all. And in either case giving the mask back to Wataru while expecting it back still shows a certain degree of trust in their relationship it wouldn't have been such a big deal for him (as it apparently was) if the mask didn't have a lot of sentimental value to him (the both of them really if we look at the whole exchange).
Now to the claim that the mask was "only" Watarus promise to stay with fine and "continue playing Tsumugis clown role". This is not entirely incorrect. Regarding the acting troupe and staying with fine bit at least.
I'm assuming this bit in EP:Link Deadend/7 is what you are referencing, and I see where you're coming from. But the bluebird line
from literally three dialogue lines further down, which references this line of dialogue (notorious Eichi line everyone should be familiar with)
kind of somewhat really recontextualises that? Because you see this is a reference to a fairytale about a pair of siblings and they get sent out by a nice fairy to find the bluebird of happiness for her sad daughter to make her happy again so they both go on an adventure and travel far and search and search but they can not find the bluebird of happiness and then when they return home again, disappointed because they couldn't find the blue bird, they realise only one night has actually passed and the journey was probably just a dream. But then their eyes fall upon their pet dove in it's cage which appears blue all of a sudden and so they gift it to the fairies sad daughter which becomes happy again and sets the bird free. The real bluebird of happiness is a dove. At least in the version of the story I'm familiar with but I mean everyone sees the symbolism right? It's. very hard to miss.
And then dropping this?
I'm not sure how to say this properly but in the overall context this makes it pretty clear that Tsumugi has nothing to do with this anymore this is Fully between Wataru and Eichi. And I am the last person to dismiss Tsumugis significance in the course of Wataeis relationship as characters I will be among the first to protest when someone dismisses the importance of Tsumugis and Eichis relationship in favour of some image they have of Wataei but he has nothing to do with this one.
Yes Tsumugi gets namedropped but - again - I don't really see how that would lessen the sentiment Wataru is triying to convey here? Because. Yes. Why wouldn't he mention Tsumugi?
The entire conversation pretty much boils down to "Yes I was initially only in this because I thought I could replace Tsumugis role in your life and then I wanted to leave but we have spent so much time together that I realised that that is definitely not working out because I really do love you. I love you as a teammate; I love you as a friend; I love you as a person and I am very angry at myself for not managing to get that into your head. So please allow me to stay with you for as long as you'll have me." And then also Eichi not understanding because he has the emotional self awareness of a very emotionally unaware loaf of bread and also because he hates himself that is a very big thing about his character huge part of his character arc actually that he. you know? Hates himself? And feels guitly for his actions during the war? And doesn't think he deserves love and companionship? Which is why Wataru wanting to stay with him for him and not for some twisted form of revenge is such an alien concept to him? Because he is projecting his insecurities onto Wataru? As one is wont to do when they hate themself? "EiChi Didn'T eVen UnDErStanD WhAt tf ThAT Mask MEAnt" Yeah. That's. That's the point? So he can think about it and come to that conclusion himself which works as a keymoment in his characters journey from hating life and himself to enjoying being alive and wanting to live on because of the people he's surrounded with? He literally explains why he didn't immediately understand the mask during the EP:Link Epilogue/4
And to get back to the "I dunno why the f you think it's ok to lie about "! EnDiNG wItH wAtAeI EnGaGeMEnT" about which I have two things to say:
"Lying" implies further intent and an effort. Neither of which exist in this case.
He literally went down on one knee while making a big proclamation of offering himself to Eichi with a very personal item that works as a symbol for their commitment to each other on a starlit rooftop. The comparison writes itself.
3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joke
And then I expected there to be a proper reason given and instead you proceed to follow that up with "when the chapter it happened wasn't even close to the end of ep:link". I know the shame is on me for expecting something sensical from an ask which has been near constant in it's lack of correct statements but such is human nature I suppose. And you are not wrong. Deadend/7 isn't very close to the end of EP:Link. That is true.
But do you know what Is very close to the end of EP:Link? The Epilogue Chapters 3-5.
Do you know what the content of those chapters is? I do. Very well actually :)
(Eichi literally explains why he didn't get it)
So if this answers your "Do you dumb fucks even read the stories?" questions, Yes. And I think I'm a lot better at it than you. So I'd say I'm coping quite well over here :p
PS: Regarding your PS, I take the "I've never been in love before so I wouldn't know" comment with a lot of humour actually as an aroace person who's emotional self awareness also ends at "good" and "Not good" I think it's very funny all things considered especially because he mentioned the loving Wataru thing several times before that and I'm generally of the belief that actions speak louder than words and also am in a happy long term relationship with the concept of "Reading Subtext". So please excuse me for not breaking down in tears everytime someone reminds me of that one singuar line of text in one of my favourite all time enstars stories that came out three years ago which also brought us the single best card set in the entire game
as well as absolute banger dialogue such as
Among others <33
And there are soooooo many other examples of wataei dialogue that simply make me swoon but I have already had to take out so many of the one's I wish I could put here so this wouldn't get "Do you love the colour of the sky" long
And also, regarding your "Wataru said that even though Eichi likes him, he still can easily discard him for the sake of his objectives" I'll just say that no he absolutely could not. I mean he'd say that and if pull comes to shove and he has no other option then he might seriously consider it but may I mention that Wataru was gone for a few days at most but really not that long of a time during Sanctuary and Eichi stopped considering being a normal rational person that doesn't leave helpless 17 year olds in the midst of a construction site. Very different situation but I feel like it's worth mentioninh here. Another example is Eichis almost not being able to go through with the war because of Wataru. Wataru had to actively come and tell Eichi to go through with it. Wataru isn't the reason Eichi started the war, that is wrong, but he is the reason Eichi almost didn't finish it. and during the war era that was his Main objective. Again I'm part of the fraction "actions speak louder than words" Show don't tell and all that, but even the words are pushing it.
And that concludes my essay :)
#I so won this#there were so many pictures and quotes I wanted to include but the limit..... :'(#if any of you were wondering I am still as insane about them as I ever was#thank you anon really genuinely and fully this has been a blast#if anyone reads the whole thing....mwah let's run off into the ocean together#or something like that idk but it is appreciated#they are my everything they really are#I'm very enamoured with the ''Cope''#Cope with what? I have nothing to cope with? well nothing wataei related at least#or the ''How do you live with the fact'' yadda yadda#How am I supposed to live with it it's funny i think it's very funny#You really trust what enstars characters say and take it at face value without examining the subtext further? amateur mistake#it's so passionate too anon i admire you#imagine disliking something so intensely you sent a very wordy ask to someone because of a silly post they made#I wish I had that much vigor in me#I mean i'd be too polite to even if I did but still it has somehting admireable to it#thanks to you i got to reread some of my favourite wataei interactions so now I think the last three hours were three hours well spent :)#genuinely thank you for the enrichment#I hope youll have a nice day we might not see eye to eye on this and I'm also objectively better at reading these stories and understanding#the characters but I still hope you'll have a nice day#as good karma or something#I'm currently still on that dopamine high from writing this i think it's obvious#best mood I've been in in ages I love talking about wataei#okay good I'll conclude the tags I've already stretched this post out so far i might as well spare the poor tag reader#but then again if you have read the post this far what's a few more tags to you#I really like the fact that the real bluebird is a dove it's soooooooo#it's good it's really good in the overall context#wataei#eichi tenshouin#hibiki wataru
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I'm in the middle of writing a javieran piece and it's got me thinking because by chapter 4, Hosea and Dutch are arguing more often than not, John is starting to pay more attention to his family, and Arthur is beginning to express his doubts more. So like if Javier and Kieran WERE in a relationship (and assuming Kieran lives, but this would still apply somewhat if he was dead) Dutch would be quaking in his boots and may even try to drive a wedge between them because if JAVIER starts to notice the cracks in the gang and focuses more on his relationship Dutch is done for. What do you think?
(this isn't very articulate I just woke up lmao)
ohh this is such a good idea … i’ve never really thought about how the rest of the gang would react to (and subsequently interact with) javier and kieran being together … personally i would think dutch could only start to really care (and become increasingly paranoid about it) if kieran were to survive. yes, by early chapter 4, dutch was already distrustful of john because john was distrustful of him after blackwater, but he only really “cut him loose” in his mind post-jack retrieval, when john really started, in dutches words, “playing family”. only by then does dutch really start to become increasingly more comfortable with entertaining the idea of exiling john from the gang, as seen by his several counts of threateningly reminding john that the first rule of VDL’s is that the gang comes first. meaning, once dutch lessens that influence of caring about john, he now has more berth in his mind to focus on and worry about other gang members. not to say that dutch wouldn’t have already considered the threat of javieran’s partnership, as dutch van der linde is the king of laying awake at night thinking about how all his loved ones can (and “probably” will) betray him, but i don’t think he’d truly be able to concoct a story in which he doesn’t come out on top, so he leaves it alone initially.
but if kieran were to be dragged into camp, one way or another, half dead and with an army of o’driscolls not too far behind him, dutch may now see this as the chess board being shuffled and the javieran side of it now having the upper hand. not so much in the sense that kieran has played any hand himself out of malice, but if he seems to be so important to colm o’driscoll that he’s willing to follow him out to a backwater corner in a shithole swamp just to kill him, then dutch now feels more comfortable with the idea of seeing kieran as baggage, or even a threat by proxy. plus, he sees how desperately javier is trying to settle the unease and distrust that is spreading in camp- several times has he rallied a campfires’ worth of people to continue trusting and believing in dutch. dutch knows exactly how valuable javier’s loyalty is, not only in his manpower, but also in his heart, and you’re right that he wouldn’t want to lose that. in dutches perspective, john’s seemingly solidified betrayal, followed by the o’driscoll attack, hosea’s death, and the trolly, i honestly think it would be in, and immediately after, guarma that dutch would begin to set his sights on impeding javieran’s partnership.
by this point, javier has a severely weakened sense of self, purpose, and safety due to the chaos of so many fatal failures in rapid succession for the VDL’s, while also having a powerfully bolstered sense of duty, trust, and loyalty to dutch because of how he committed to saving javier’s life before getting off of guarma (while arthur saw the worst of him there, javier was locked in a cage, so he’s no more privy to his leader’s downward spiral than he was before). so pairing this state of mind of javier’s with the way that kieran essentially lead the o’driscolls straight to them, it’s the perfect in for dutch to start trying to worm his way into javier’s mind about how kieran may not be “who he thinks”. now, i’ve seen a few documentaries on dutch, but i’m certainly no specialist, so i can’t settle on how exactly he would go about proposing doubt into javier’s mind. i could see him projecting things onto javi, convincing him into believing that it’s potential that he sees in kieran, and not what he actually provides. or perhaps similar to how grimshaw sees the threat in mary to arthur’s loyalty and attempts manipulation accordingly, dutch may not even pull javier aside but simply start speaking to his boat of disheveled followers on the way back from the island, saying “you know, we lost a few good men back there, and are mending a few more. that o’driscoll ambush was the last thing we needed- and that kieran, i never did like him.” simply to knowingly leave javier deflated, conflicted, and left separated from his lover long enough to let the love in his heart get muddled in the chaos.
by here, it could be written two different ways, depending on where your javier lies in his distance from canon LOL “canonically” (not that it could be, by now, since kieran must be alive, but let’s say that’s the only thing that changed and we aren’t going to diverge the ending itself any further), javier would fall for dutches tongue, and his relationship would eventually fall apart. kieran would notice immediately that javier’s heart was no longer with him, and it would quickly go downhill from there- in my opinion, kieran would then abandon the gang like a few of the other members prior to the climax shootout, and javier would make it there with just an extra ounce of grief in his heart, going on to flee to mexico like normal.
the OTHER outcome, and how i would write it personally because canon is simply something for me to clock in and out of as i please, is that javier’s conflictions are just a smidgen less due to that little ounce more free kieran makes him feel compared to the current state of the gang, (and no matter what, if he has to fight, he’ll fight, if he has to run, he’ll run. if he has to die, he’ll die. but he’ll stay free. yes, i am bastardizing this quote towards individuality.) and he manages to break free of dutches delusional influence- with dutches attempt at splitting javieran up being the thing that gave javier the courage to doubt him. javier owes dutch his life, and he knows this, but by chapter 6, javier’s love and the purpose he’s found outside of the gang (with kieran), like john’s (for his family) and arthur’s (for john), gives him the clarity to choose that over blindly following dutch off of the cliff. usually it’s around this time that i write him to flee, off to go find kieran again and choose him again, for the last time, once and for all.
i do think this is a very fun thing to speculate on !! thank you for sharing with me and for asking my opinion on it :’] it makes me very happy that you wanted to hear it !!! i agree with you that dutch could very well begin to see javieran as a threat against him, especially with john’s “betrayal” happening right before his very eyes stinging him already. it would be very easy to conclude that dutch would want to begin meddling in any relationships that aren’t between people whom he knows won’t question him- and kieran was never really loyal to him at all. if anything, it’s arthur he’s loyal to, what with how he thanks arthur profusely for sparing, protecting, and improving his life overall. dutch is smart enough to know that if he can convince javier to shake kieran, he’ll stay a valuable pawn on dutches side of the board no matter what, because then he’ll have nothing else again.
please please please do let me know when you’re finished writing it !!! i would be ecstatic to read it, i’m living on crumbs over here <//3
#this isn’t the most articulate either since i’m still a little high but i was too excited thinking about it not to start actually writing do#wn what i was thinking when i was initially reading it and mulling it over#i hope it makes sense and sounds about right ;__; i’m not super confident in my characterizations yet (mostly cuz my memory is so bad and i#haven’t written them a ton lately (nor really analyzed them like i should in a long time))#it was so fun though to think about it ! i’d never thought of dutches perspective on them … only theirs on him#thank you again ! it truly made me giddy to have you ask what i thought about it :’] it makes me feel special that u thought to come to me#idk where u really were thinking of taking the piece but i’m excited to see it !!!#so happy to hear that there’s another person out there making content for them !!!!!!!! my cowboy lovers how i love them so </3#thank you !!!!!!!!#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#kieran duffy#javier escuella#javieran#text#ask#anon#hero's yelling at folks again#hero’s waxing poetics again#(iirc that’s my writing tag)
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Hello!! I came here because I was informed you had some Wriowinne headcanons and ramblings to share? Would it be alright for me to ask for some 👉👈 (or as much as you want to share please I'm desperate for food)
OH BOY DO I.
I feel you anon, I've been shipping them like...since the PV. So I've been stuck in utter absolute hell, getting nothing but father&daughter content from the fandom (shoutout to @hydrachea for being able to dual wield and letting me talk ship to her, light of my life fr weh). I'm hoping now that 4.1 has been out for a little bit, we'll get some more of them, though. I've dug through our dms, and found a hc that takes place after 4.1. So spoilers for that archon quest, but no leaks are involved!
Anyway, I love thinking about how close they cut it at the climax of 4.1, and the aftermath of it all.
Sigewinne somehow finding out what happened down there at the bottom of Meropide while she was evacuating the inmates, and like. She knows what the stakes were. The Primordial Seawater could not be allowed to rise. Clorinde made the right decision in shooting the gate lock. Even if it had killed Wriothesley, it still would have been the right decision.
That doesn't mean it's not a bitter pill to swallow.
Sigewinne can usually put it out of mind during the day, especially when she's busy treating patients, but it's harder when she's asleep. She dreams of the evacuation, and the alarm blaring, and waiting and waiting and waiting, and Clorinde walking past, alone, with her head down and her fists shaking, until Neuvilette finally approaches. Wriothesley isn't with him.
And Neuvilette's face doesn't really show much. It never does. But Sigewinne is close enough to the surface that she can hear the absolute downpour raging outside as Neuvilette tells her that he's sorry, he's so so sorry, and he gives her a gray and black and red coat, so soaked through with Primordial Seawater that he'd been afraid to let anyone else touch it, and the fur collar is matted and wet against Sigewinne's face when she clutches it close-
Sigewinne jolts awake, grasping at whatever is in her reach, which just happens to include Wriothesley's arm. His eyes almost immediately fly open, slurring out a mix of what's goin' on and what's wrong, and then a do we need to evacuate and poor Sigewinne, she feels awful. He hasn't been sleeping as well since the almost-flood, every little sound wakes him up now.
(There are nights where she'll wake up alone, and if she goes looking, she'll find Wriothesley, still in his sleep clothes and looking exhausted, down under their secret passage and staring at Neuvilette's seal over the sluice gate. Like he's keeping watch over it, or just daring it to try and do something.
Whenever she finds him like this, Sigewinne tells him to come on, come back to bed, and he'll keep his eye on it until the last possible second, but generally Wriothesley comes when called, and he'll let her lead him away. On his worse nights, he'll tell her to go back without him, he can't sleep anyway, he's going to stay down here for just a little while longer. He'll be back later. And she does occasionally go back to bed, but most of the time she stays, because she doesn't like the idea of him alone down there. Sigewinne will tuck herself into his side, or she'll get him to relax his guard just enough to lay with his head in her lap, and they'll stay there like that until Wriothesley finally decides he can bear to leave it alone and go back to bed with her.)
So with all that in mind, when she accidentally wakes him up, Sigewinne quickly gets her breathing back under control and pets his hair until he relaxes again. She tells him it's fine, everything is ok. Meropide is safe. Their home and everyone in it is safe. Go back to sleep. He needs his rest if he's going to go up to the overworld for supplies in the morning. She'll go sleep in the infirmary, she just had a nightmare, is all (the truth), it was nothing, she barely even remembers it anymore (a lie).
Sigewinne doesn't even make it out of bed, though, because when she tries to go, she finds her wrist suddenly caught. She turns back and Wriothesley is squinting up at her face, human night vision isn't nearly as good as a Mélusine's. They sit there like that for a moment, until she can see through the expression on his face that he's come to some sort of decision. Wriothesley pulls her back in and Sigewinne lets him, lets him rearrange them into something more comfortable. It's easy to give up when it's him, she didn't truly want to leave anyway. By the time he makes a satisfied little huff into her hair, Sigewinne is tucked under his chin, her face against his chest, one arm wrapped around her to keep her there. She pats his side and tells him ok, ok, she gets it. She won't go anywhere.
Wriothesley buries his face in her hair and sighs at that, something deeper and more content that hilariously reminds Sigewinne of a dog asleep on the floor. "Good." Wriothesley sounds like he's already half-asleep again. His arm still tightens around her waist though, just to make a point. "How could I sleep, when I know you're off somewhere crying alone?"
Sigewinne touches her cheek, and sure enough, it's wet? She has tear tracks. No wonder Wriothesley had been staring at her so hard. She hadn't even realized. And she opens her mouth to protest because she wasn't crying, some tears in her sleep doesn't count, but. Wriothesley is already asleep again, breathing slow and deep and even, and his arm is heavy and warm around her, and his sleep shirt is soft and comfortable against her face, not at all like the fur-collared coat in her dreams.
Sigewinne gives in again, curls into all that warmth and wraps herself up in it, until it lulls her back to sleep.
#sigewrio#wriosig#wriowinne#genshin impact wriothesley#genshin impact sigewinne#THEM.....#augh my heart#I love them so much rolling around kicking making girly noises on my bed#I love thinking about Rosie being protective of Meropide#he put so much work into this place#into these people#I have bigger longer thoughts for that which will maybe go into their own post later#but after his release because I wrote them in a dm one (1) whole day before reading project amber and oh my god#the leaks made it SO much funnier JFKLJASKLDFJ#just realized I called him Rosie in a tag so just for the record that's my nickname I usually use for Wriothesley#it will probably happen again#but anyway yes post-4.1 hurt/comfort#they're so so sweet and they go through it a little bit but they have each other for it <3#I hope this is enough of a starter anon I have more for later though#thank you so much it made me really happy to get this ask <3#genshin impact#genshin impact 4.1#wriothesley#sigewinne#ask#answer#anon
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Hey so Snap this is going to be so fucking weird, but honestly don’t care. So I was watching a clip of Drag Race Philippines and it was the make over episode and I think they were making over family members and this father was all about getting into drag. So, I just wanted to tell you never forget how much of a lovely loving kind and caring father you have, who loves you and protects you and makes you feel heard. That’s all.
i'd have to die before i forget how great my dad is thank you for the opportunity to brag about him again anon
#snap chats#no smarmy one-sentence response i fear i never play about my dad's character and its been. A Month so i gotta be earnest#Comically And Topically tho i still wonder wtf my dad meant when he said 'i always thought of being a girl' when i opened up to him#part of me thinks he was just joking and thats probably it but also ....... //audible confusion + vine boom + eyebrow quirking//#its so funny you brought up my dad though i was thinking of visiting him this weekend#last week my Bitch Ass Mom wanted to watch a movie with me and since speak no evil was coming out i proposed we see that#since starting therapy shes been 'trying' to be closer with us but she still doesnt like me on a fundamental level so get bent ig#but she hates horror movies and made a whole show of not wanting to go and how american movies are so brutal and blah blah#this was right after she took me ice skating with her .. cause shes obsessed with ice skating now ... like maam please#i like skating so thank you but ... idk ... she never wants to do things i wanna do#then again we're pretty different i think so. LOL sorry i like horror movies and nothing you like apparently#im glad she didnt come cause i just went with my bro and since the theater was Virtually Empty we just cracked jokes the whole time vjlaekv#plus i just know my mom wouldve been annoying and i wanted to enjoy the movie !!!! which i did ty !!!!!!!#but yk who LOVES horror movies and who i used to watch horror movies with all the time growin up !!!!!!!!!!#i havent seen a movie with my dad in forever.... the last one we saw was so long ago but it was some weird owen wilson movie i think#wait now that ive dragged my mom into this she started therapy Did I Share That. Im Reminding You Anyway#but the most vile thing i ever heard her say was that she admitted to me she never loved my dad 'emotionally'#like wow ..... a thousand life times in hell for you i think i cant even begin to describe the rage chat i could write a novel#but i only have 30 tags so i wont. i should call my dad tho.. this is inspiring me to call my dad thank you anon#if youre still reading Double Thank You. i havent complained about my mom in a while and this was just funny timing overall vjRLKJAEVK#ok im gonna go talk with my dad now. my college friend's coming oevr in like three hours and we're gonna watch glass#cause that came up in convo yesterday Long Story so that should be funny vjlekjlakj
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Aerie, I love your OC's so much! I have a few questions about them if you don't mind.
How does Rayne feed? Does he eventually drink from Elliot? How does that conversation go?
TWT Thank you!! And of course I don't mind!!! I'm literally vibrating in my seat every time I get to talk about them. Thank you so much for asking!<3<3<3 Warning, it's long again. Oops. :')
About Rayne feeding:
When Rayne was first changed, Laurent brought him hunting and the whole thing freaked him out a lot. When Laurent caught a man for them to share, Rayne couldn't do it. He didn't want to hurt anyone. Laurent thought his nervousness was cute, but couldn't let him starve. So he held out his own wrist and let Rayne drink from him instead. (So basically, Rayne would use Laurent as a SillyStraw- emphasis on 'silly' because the man loses his mind later on lol- instead of drinking directly from people.)
After a few months, Laurent tells him that he's got to learn to hunt for himself and Rayne does. It takes almost all night but catches someone and doesn't know when to stop. When Laurent finds him, Rayne is having a mental breakdown. Rayne does not eat humans after that. Only from Laurent.
So, nearly the entire time he's with Laurent, Rayne feeds that way. He drinks from Laurent. Laurent's blood (the blood of a vampire who is much older than him) is like… Top Shelf. It's delicious and also blood-sharing between vampires is basically foreplay so like… Yay. : )
When he leaves his SillyStraw behind, Rayne figures blood is blood. He eats animals. It's nowhere near as good. But it works fine. When he's in the city he finds rats. When he's really hungry he'll drive until he finds a forest and take a deer. Or a fox. Or three. He usually he tries to avoid eating anything that could be considered someone's pet, like cats and dogs. But... desperate times...
Does Rayne drink from Elliot?
After some Laurent-flavored fuckery occurs, Rayne is terrified of leaving Elliot alone in the apartment. So he can't go out for a bite. After a few days, Elliot can't stand it. "Babe, it's been a week. You need to go eat." "I can't." "I'll be fine. Everything's alright-" Rayne just shakes his head, like a stubborn child. (But Rayne has OCD- the magical thinking kind, just like me 🙃we suffer together- and the last time he left Elliot alone, he got hurt. He can't risk it.) After a moment of standing there, watching Rayne's hands shake from across the room, Elliot sits down next to him and the vampire stiffens from head to toe. Stops breathing. E: You can't leave the house? R: I can't leave the house. E: What if I stood in the hallway while you were gone? Then I wouldn't be in the apartment by myself. R: No. He still knows where we live. E: What if I leave before you? I could go pick up food for later. R: Then you'd be alone. E: Let me go hunting with you. R: (laughs) No. E: Then drink from me. R: Have you lost your mind? E: If it's starvation or eating me, it's eating me. R: I won't. E: Please. I don't like watching you hurt yourself. Don't like you hungry. R: I could kill you. E: You won't. I saw you let a deer go once. If you can let some dumb deer go, you can let your boyfriend go. Right? R: I have a feeling you'd taste a lot better than a bloody deer. E: Come on. Let me help. Pretend it's the same as me cooking for you. R: (rolls his eyes) Producing blood isn't cooking. E: I said pretend. R: Elliot- E, whispering: If you keep starving yourself, you might lose it and end up eating me anyway. I'd rather be a willing snack than a helpless victim. R: (realizes he's right) E: What do you want, my neck? (moves his shirt collar to the side) R: (swallows thickly and shakes his head) Wrist. E: Wrist it is.
And then he watches Rayne's fangs drop out of his gums and sink into his skin, the vampire's eyelids fluttering when he pulls in that first mouthful of blood. The first human blood he's had in fourteen years. Rayne's eyes glow as he drinks and Elliot can't say he doesn't like the feeling of being drank from.
After a moment, Rayne pulls away with a gasp and his eyes settle back to that dark blue Elliot's used to. And Elliot smiles, "Am I better than a deer?"
ALSO, Rayne still eats regular ol' food too! He doesn't know how to cook though. Before Elliot comes along, he lives on take away. He keeps a binder in a kitchen drawer stuffed with takeout menus in sheet protectors. (It is amazingly organized, by cuisine and then by alphabetical order. His favorite things from each restaurant are carefully highlighted so that he doesn't forget.)
#thank you SO much anon for asking#sorry it's a Whole Thing again.#but i got super excited and actually WROTE their conversation instead of just thinking about it forever. i will be copying that into my doc#also i color coded their conversation because it was a Block of Text and sort of hard to read i felt? (those are their fave colors btw)#anyway. dying to talk about them always if anyone wants to encourage my insanity...#aerie's ocs#oc: rayne hastings#oc: elliot montgomery#oc ship: relliot#anon#answered#love
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Your ™ (aside from faramir obv) is how unhinged you are about denethor AND having the most correct takes abt him🧡. Oh and also oranges maybe
AAAA...THANK YOU ??? THIS KNOCKED ME FLAT like for real i cannot express how much ive been thinking about this ask all day. like i was in the grocery store thinking about it. i cant decide if it's funnier if you've been here since i was 19 and a hater and watched me have my dramatic change of heart in real time or if youre new here and don't know my tragic backstory. TO ME it's hilarious to be assigned denethor girl bc like teenage me is having a heart attack but i bear the badge with pride nevertheless <3333 and thats what we call character growth!
pj had totally got me with the mad-and-vindictive-with-despair denethor gambit for years and years but literally i started working on the faramir goes to rivendell au and thought for about two seconds about how complex both faramir and boromir's relationships with their father are and how the film changes genuinely weaken all of their characters so much and did a total 180 degree turn on a dime. by doing denethor dirty i would automatically be doing faramir dirty and then i started thinking and went hang on a second he is so complex and interesting actually. like i can't emphasize how much that was the exact logic that allowed me to achieve this development.
i mean okay LISTEN TO ME oh my GOD denethor IS a good leader there's a reason why gondor stood so long alone against the enemy and he NEARLY fucking beat SAURON in 30 years worth of head-to-head knock-down-drag-out psychic stalemate warfare and he only falls into despair when he loses both of his sons. you don't need to like him to respect the achievement!
i almost put a read more here but fuck it denethorposting on main. hit j on your keyboard or do a big scroll if youre sick of me LOL
i am very well known for going totally feral over duty vs love dynamics and that is literally what is going on between denethor and his sons. he cannot be their father and their commander at the same time and they are at war!!! being their commander has to win out above all else!!! whether any of them like it or not!!! do you know what ruthlessness means do you understand that duty wins this one.
do u guys understand that denethor and faramir are a father and son who love each other above else and yet do not like each other at all. there was a schism somewhere there along the line and love without bitterness and political sniping and ideological misalignment is a DISTANT MEMORY. No Of Course He Shouldn't Have Said He Wished Faramir And Boromir's Places Exchanged Jesus Christ No Son Should Have To Hear That From Their Father But Girl Sometimes When You're Grieving You Say Stupid Shit That You Shouldn't Have. doesn't mean you should've said it but [pippin voice] we can understand poor denethor a bit better, huh?
its just so interesting to me to think about faramir and denethor's relationship from a standpoint of like. ok listen good stewards that are not good fathers and dutiful sons who will not compromise their moral compasses for love. i don't like you and i agree with approximately 1% of everything you've said ever and your expectations of me have always been unreasonably high even when i was a child but you also are the only person who could ever understand the terrifying psychic powers that just live inside my brain and you are probably the incarnation of lordly dignity and power that i have had and i have wanted to emulate all my life and i still have the instinct to ask for your approval even if i'm going to hate what you're going to say. and when i'm dying i will call out for you. and i don't like you and your moral compass is going to get you and me and everyone in our city killed and you haven't listened to a single thing i've said since you were fourteen and i fucking hate that you're listening to and trusting the fucking wizard over me but you are my best captain and you are everything that i wished i could've been without the war and you'll never understand that that's why i pushed you so hard i just wanted you to live. and if you couldn't live at least we could die together. LISTEN i am a faramir girl until the death you all KNOW THIS BUT THESE TWO THINGS ARE NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE- [i am forcibly yanked offstage]
#from the inbox#Anonymous#THANK YOU YOU ARE AN ANGEL!!! I LOVE YOU!!!#sorry for how unhinged this answer got ive been drinking#my friday night: totally sober sitting quietly filing my taxes. my saturday night: wine drunk denethor ranting. i am an adult#you: ur brand is being unhinged about this specific topic. me tasked with talking about that topic: sorry for being unhinged. hilarious#idk like oh my god yeah the transgender allegory of 'parent insisting their child is dead while people cry out that they're still living'#fucks crazy. i fucking love that reading. but im tired of the madman-idiot-caricature lack of textually-referenced nuance out here!#bitch king faramir and complex noble lord denethor are actually concepts that are holding hands. To Me.#also YES!!! ORANGES!!! i have an orange tattoo lol i love you i'm glad i exist. there is secret lore but i think if i don't stop talking no#everyone who follows me will explode me with their minds#i am still taking trademark asks if anyone at all has read this far LOL#long post#SORRY AGAIN LMAOOO#denethor anon#denethorposting
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Rid I'm so sad that you're receiving this hate but for me you're one of the kindest people in here. I'm always rooting for you. Sending hugs. 🥰
thank you babe, i think i needed to hear this.. you're the sweetest, all the hugs back 🥺🤍
#dunno if anyone will read the tags but to be fully honest.. someone said it just yday but#it just sucks feeling so lonely bc so many ppl here seem to be in groups and also hate me? i know i cant be liked by everyone that's okay#but all this hate?.. n i see people interact and be friends n stuff and im in my corner here and just extremely lonely#mutuals don't really interact w me either :') and then i always feel awkward and weird bc i think nobody WANTS to be my friend#which used to be different. maybe i deserved it idk#but yeah very lonely and very “everyone hates me” feel and makes me not rlly wanna do tumblr and writing anymore which is why i might close#this blog after cmi :( n wow i think ive never said it that openly and maybe ill delete it all again ufjdjfud ive just been Sad about this#idk i just hate constantly asking myself 'does anyone still care or like me at all' it just sucks#i'm saying all this n anons will once again find a way to send hate lol. just made tumblr very not comforting for me.. and yeah. anyways#thank you to you guys who still send so much love. when i say it means a lot i truly mean it bc it's always nice to know that ppl are still#here 🤍#notes for rid 🌹#anon
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hey just wanted to say that I dropped by on tumblr again to find you cuz I was watching hbo's tlou and I thought hm i wonder if that girl that loves tlou is still around, and nice to see u are! this might be pretty random but from time over the years I would remember you when tlou was brought up 😄 also goddamn this series. i'm crying all over again
oh, this makes my heart so full 😭❤️ it’s been nearly 10 years but i’m still here! i don’t think my love for this game will ever go away 🥹
#the way i immediately started crying after i read this#it sounds so dorky but i get really sad thinking about the early tlou days and being a solely tlou blog#i met so many amazing people through this game#had so many meaningful conversations about it#and to think that someone somewhere still associates me with it#GODDD#crying again#the hbo series has definitely reignited my love for the game#seriously anon thank you for sending this#you’ve made my whole night#❤️❤️❤️
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New Ryomina fic, Lizz!!
THREE WEEKS LATE TO THIS ASK BUT THANK U ANON!! honestly when i got this inbox i was like. tearing up. im like. "oh my god. people still think of me when they see ryomina. thank you so much. that means a lot to me. im so glad people want to share the joy of ryomina with me."
i assume that this is probably about "i alone await you," since the ask came around that time (two people possibly notifying me about this! crazy! this is positive. do not take that the wrong way), and i want to say that i've read it and am going to be insufferable about it for the forseeable future.
and if it is not about that fic than oops. give me clown makeup. i will happily put that on (my true form is that of a clown). i hope to read some more ryominas, it's been awhile since i've sat down to read the tag and. god. did you know? im so normal about them. anyways, thank you anon! 💛💙
#lizzy askbox#I STILL REMEMBER BEING LIKE 'OH MY GOD TWO PEOPLE WANTED TO LET ME KNOW ABOUT THIS FIC'#AND GOING. 'OMG. I LOVE YOU PEOPLE.'#AND THEN I PROCEED TO TAKE AWHILE TO READ IT BC LIFE IS BUSY.#BUT GOD. THANK U ANON. sorry for all the caps. i just get excited very easily#unrelated but related. does anyone remember when i had like. ao3 bookmarks.#i say 'had' as if they all disappeared (they didn't) but. mm. i'd def love 2 go looking at fic again#there's definitely a lot of good stuff out there that i haven't seen just bc they might not be in tags that i frequent#but god!! i am so excited to read again!!!#i've mostly been preoccupied with reading nonfiction from the library but lately ive been wanting a fic itch#so maybe one of these days i will compile a list of fics i like. as a throwback to 2021. but also 2 celebrate these wonderful authors#thank you again for thinking of me whenever it comes to ryomina the english language is not enough for me to say how much i like these two#and it continues to bring me joy seeing people posting about them and falling in love with them and appreciating their dynamic#because what is fandom if not to celebrate the things that you love with other people and cry collectively? anyway. im normal (lie)
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I'm glad you think of us trying to bully you as a safe space <3
BUT I DO!!!!!!!!!
Bullying from anons warm and cozy, oh to be tormented by people who knows which buttons to press and use this knowledge specifically to make you flustered, happy, and feeling silly. what's not to like!!
But honestly tho, i almost mentioned in the other ask i got today about whether i'm okay with my blog becoming an ask blog like this, but then i didn't bc i thought it might be mean spirited, but now i'm right back on it-- is that one undeniable perk of the anon is that i actually check my dash far less now.
And while there will always be content i will miss seeing (especially information post about irl issues which i do think are important to be aware of, or good arts, or what people i like on here are up to), by god am i not missing reading negative petty fandom stuff.
Even things i agree with leave me with a major bad taste in my mouth because when it's all you see, it just ends up being like poison tainting everything else.
Being able to take a step back, mostly enjoying the things you enjoy, and having the negative stuff being something you discuss with yourself, is much more freeing at the end of the day.
So in the end just genuinely messing around, being silly, making fun HCs just because why the fuck not, is really so, so much more enjoyable to me.
Like, sure, i've been scarred beyond repair by some stuff shared here, but that's the price to pay -- but in the end since i'm having fun, what's not to like yaknow?
so like, i actually genuinely appreciate the anons, they do stop me from doomscrolling and spiraling on most day because everytime it pulls me back into some comfort zone, even if it's to terrorize me in it. Sometimes it can take a bit for me to go back to the headspace needed to answer the anons -- but i take that, everyday, over just reading negative stuff that just ends up leave me spiraling alone with my thoughts yaknow?
So, actually, thanks y'all for deciding to terrorize my inbox -- this is, without a doubt, the best thing that ever happened to me 💞💞
#ichareply#ichasalty#anonymous#like the one key thing about it is that the person i was reading was a hater in ways i'm also a hater on some stuff#(+ a hater of something i actually like but in a way i understood but therefore made it worse)#so like. i was AGREEING with some it. or at least understanding the angle. the opinion was super insightful. also super depressing.#reading 2 years worth of someone's negative opinions on something that has goods and bads but therefore so much focus on the bads#it just... just leaves such a 'whats the point! what's the point!!' in my head that is so horrible#like. something something but i think socmed being so much about screaming into the void and all#means that thoughts lingers and echos without actually a place to resolve them#and you're left alone with them and overwhelmed as they accumulate#which will always be different from asks and discussions which are actually a back and forth yaknow?#and it's different to be part of the conversation than just reading after the fact#at the end of the day it's my bad for doomscrolling. i may not be smart.#but it's so easy to get caught into it especially when you agree because you want to hear more about this angle in particular#and before you know you went too deep and it's like ah. how do i get back to the surface again now.#it's good to address flaws in what you like... but i also think there's ways where it can become damaging especially when it's passively#ANYWAY IM JUST RAMBLING BUT AAAAAAARGHHHHHH#I LOVE YOU ALL THE ANONS IN MY ASKS. YOU MAKE RUNNING THIS BLOG WORTHWHILE. THANK YOU FOR DEEMING ME WORTH BULLYING ILYS
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Hiii, it’s me again…T,
I saw the ask about everyone smiling n being happy and i was like “this is exactly how i feel whenever i read someone’s reply to my asks”. That anon is sooo right!!
Work is crazy. Plus I’m preparing for my residency stuff.. so I’m doing an audit for that and it’s driving me nuts.. but when i open thmblr n see something like this it puts a smile on my face, makes me feel lighter.. makes the day a little bit better
I was not having a nice day and then I saw that ask and it made me smile. So, thank you anon and thank you love ❣️
xo
oh my gosh, hiiii again! and first of all, i am SO sorry it's taken me this long to reply 🙈 i am a bit terrible when it comes to asks, i'm afraid - i have this bad habit of seeing them, and smiling, and meaning to reply... but then, well, life happens, and i completely forget about them till days/weeks/months (a year??) later. it's not been a year this time at least!!!
all that aside, though - awww, this is such a lovely message <333 it means a lot that i could make you smile 😁❤️ and i'm so sorry you were having a rough day - hope today was loads better for you, love <333 ohhh! and BEST of luck with the residency, gosh. sending you hugs & strength!! and for extra good luck, here's one of my favourite piarles gifs too:
THE T-SHIRT GRAB AND SCRUNCH. i will never be over it. never ever. !!!!!!!!!!!!
but anyway! thank you so much for this very kind ask, really ❤️ all the best to you!! 💞
#asks & answers#anon#lovely anons#😘 fic anon#this is you right?? i'm not just getting confused between different anons; right?#omg. but since you ARE the kiss fic anon....#not to be completely insufferable BUT#did you see there is a new chapter out#and reactions to it are absolutely WILD hahahaha#my favourite so far is 'taking charles out back and smacking him against a wall like a dusty rug' HAAHAHAHAHAH#(this is in reference to charles being an idiot about his feelings btw)#and i think that's one of the funniest comment's i've ever had bahahahahaha#WITH THIS SAID THOUGH. there is absolutely no pressure to go read the fic right now!!#it's not going to go anywhere anytime and i know that you're very busy 🫂#but also if this update can make you smile at all....#well. here's hoping it does!! ❤️#thank you again for this ask <3333 appreciate you; love!
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