#this stream is MY comfort stream the future ones might happen but this is just. my god this stream is special to me

[flairza]

WE LOVE THE QSMP!!! GRAHHHH I HOPE THERES MORE QSMP MEETUPS AND IRL STREAMS/CONTENT SOON !!!

[drdemonprince]

I know so many people who are certain the world is about to end. They’ve felt this way since about 2016 or so. They are neurotic and unempowered, refreshing their Twitter feeds and making posts begging others to stay worried and go vote. 

Some of them are leftists, and say they wish to see an end to capitalism, perhaps even to America — but when the possibility starts actually feeling real to them, they fear crime, and chaos, and their own helplessness. They joke uneasily that we live in “The Bad Place” but they are too afraid to get to the good one. They don’t want to see an end to their quiet street corner, their cozy condominium, their favorite television shows on streaming, their door with a lock. They admit this world is hell but they try to claim their own corner of it and keep it comfortable. 

I’ve been in the exact mental spot as these people, so I don’t mean to make myself sound superior. For the longest time, all I wanted to do was find a few comforting distractions to get me through the years before my death. I went to bed with my stomach in knots, certain that one day the power grid would go dark, the water would stop flowing, and the fascists would march in the streets and no one would stop them. 

Back then I didn’t fantasize that I would do anything to stop them. I picture things differently now. 

I used to think that voting and calling representatives were my only avenues for political participation, but now I see that with every choice I am not merely voting for a better world, I am creating it. When I fund a friend’s jaw surgery, when I look an unhoused person in the eyes and ask them how they are doing, when I slow my walking speed, when I share my knowledge, I am making decisions about how the future will be. I am not powerless. I am small, and vulnerable, but I always have something to give. 

I think that when we are feeling powerless and afraid of the collapse, it’s helpful to shift our attention toward practical, empowering questions like these:

If the government collapsed today, what would I do tomorrow?

The End of the World is a big, frightening abstraction. But if some terrible disaster (or glorious revolution) were to happen today, all I’d have to do tomorrow is make a few basic decisions. What would I eat? Where would I sleep? Who would I contact first? 

At the end of the world there are still dirty clothes and rumbling bellies. Those pressing physical needs are the most immediate questions we will need to answer, not larger philosophical quandaries about what life is “for,” or what the ideal new political system should be. For those more essential questions, there will always be answers: canned food to gather, lakes to wash off in, stories to be traded across candlelight. 

The future that we expect is just a fiction we tell ourselves, and it has never been guaranteed. And so, when some dramatic change comes, we can focus not on the loss of certainty, but on the practicalities: finding shelter, getting fed, and keeping the people around us as safe as we can. This is already what life is about — and we’re all more practiced in survival than we might think. 

If the world as I know it ended, what would still be important to me?

Hitting my weekly wordcount goals wouldn’t matter at all anymore, I know that much. But in the wake of a terrible collapse I would still value my friends, my immediate family, my chinchilla, and the people I see every day. I wouldn’t be so fixated on never seeming ‘awkward’ or ‘creepy’; the moment disaster happened, I would just get over myself and knock on my neighbors’ doors. 

If the world ended, I’d stop caring about my appearance, but I’d still long for a mode of self-expression like fashion currently provides. I wouldn’t think of my writing “career,” but I’d still want to be heard. I can imagine myself giving a small speech to my neighbors, trying to persuade them to take whatever course of action I thought best. I would be wrong often and not always persuasive, but I would still get to express myself and witness how that expression influences the world. I’d take care of more animals. I’d worry less about my apartment getting banged up and wrecked. 

It’s worthwhile to contemplate the people we will become after capitalism. The rhythms of our lives will change, as will our priorities. We may harbor fears about all that may be lost, but it’s worth asking whether our possessions and favorite TV shows and Twitch streamers are really all that important. I often find myself looking forward to the person I could become in this new reality. And those thoughts often motivate me to make small changes in who I am and what I prioritize right now.

The full essay also contemplates these questions about the apocalypse:

What would I feel unburdened from?

What important work would I keep doing?

What skills do I have that people will always need? 

What help would I ask for? 

You can read the full piece for free, or have it narrated to you in the Substack app, right here.

[annisassintchaska]

You’re at Lewis’s place, just laying down on the bed watching a movie when he receives a call. "Who is it?" I asked. He looked at who it was, letting out a frustrated sigh. Then he smiled and tried to brush it off. “No one important.” He lied. "Answer it" I demanded as he tried to hang it up.

He couldn’t help but swallow thickly at my demands as he answered it and put it on speaker mode. “Hello?” He answered. Hearing a woman answering from the other side wasn't a shock until she told him that she was looking forward to another session with his dick.

His eyes widen as his heart drops when he heard her say that. He felt embarrassed when I heard that as he quickly put it on mute “It’s no one important I swear” he said nervously, trying to get out the situation. Narrowing my eyes at him, I then heard the woman go on about how she wanted to have his children in the future after our divorce, I jumped up and went into the bathroom, locking the door. He told her about my miscarriage and fertility issues my mind screamed.

His face expression went from nervous to complete fear seeing your reaction as it made his heart sink. He immediately tried to get up and followed me to the bathroom, knocking on the door, “Baby please open the door!” he pleaded. "No" I said very calmly as to not explode. Lewis tried to open the door but it wouldn’t budge. “Please just let me explain!” he tried to persuade as he continued to knock, his heart beating loudly by each thump. "Lewis I'm begging you please find another room to be in" I said as my voice raised a couple of octaves.

Lewis could hear from my voice that I was trying so hard not to explode right then and there. He took a deep breath and sat down right in front of the bathroom door. “Please just let me in and listen to me. I’ll explain everything please” he said. "Taking a deep breath, I told him to speak. He felt a wave of momentary relief as he heard my voice, indicating that I might be calmer. He leaned his back against the door and began speaking. “It was a one time thing and it only happened that one night at the party. I was very drunk that’s all-"

"That is no fucking excuse!" I yelled as I took up the container on the sink throwing it into the mirror and breaking it. Lewis heard the sound of glass shattering inside making him flinch. He felt his heart break when he heard that, feeling how upset I sounded. “I know it’s not an excuse but please just understand. I did it that one time… and I regret it so much so please just open the door” he said with sorrow in his voice. "If you only did it once then why does she have your number, why is it that she can call and be so comfortable with saying such lewd remarks!" I questioned as I pulled the bathroom apart breaking everything in my way, cutting and injuring myself in the process. His heart dropped even more as he began to hear glass shattering and things breaking. He immediately got up again and began to bang on the door harder. “Please stop! Please stop it!” he yelled desperately, fear in his voice as tears began to form in his eyes. His voice sounded panicked, “Don’t hurt yourself. Please just open the door, I’m sorry just don’t do this to yourself”.

"It's too late to beg Lewis, why would you do this to me?!" I screamed throwing the glass vase into the glass shower door, splinters flying and piercing my skin all over as I screamed. "You knew of my fertility issues and went to tell her!" I wailed in disbelief that my husband would hurt me this deeply. Lewis slammed his fists against the door in frustration and panic, feeling completely helpless. Tears streamed down his face as he yelled back, “I wasn’t thinking, okay?! I was wasted and I was stupid!” He paused for a moment, taking in a shuddering breath as he imagined the damage you were doing to yourself, “Please… I regret it. I regret it so much. Please open the door”.

"What if I just ended it all right here? That would feel so good" I spoke to myself even though my husband heard every word. Lewis’s body froze as he heard those words. A new wave of panic took over as he yelled my name out, banging on the door harder. “No, no please no! Please don’t say things like that. Please don’t do anything. I’ll do anything, please just open the door!” Walking on the broken glass that pierced my feet with each step, I went into the drawer taking out the gun that was kept there for protection and took off the safety which echoed in the through the door. Feeling his heart stop and his blood run cold, Lewis began to panic even more. He could only helplessly hear what was happening on the other side of the door as he slammed his body against it multiple times. “No please don’t do this. Please don’t do it please! Please open the door!” he was yelling and pleading as tears streamed down his face uncontrollably.

Fighting with all his might, Lewis managed to kick the door in, flicking the gun from my hand and grabbing out the bathroom as I wailed in his arms due to his hands being in my open wounds. Placing me on the bed and carefully holding me down as to not touch the wounds I wailed until my voice was almost gone and I was in a state of drowsiness yet still heartbroken as I cried softly. "Why...just why? Wasn't I good enough of a wife for you?" I asked sadly as I sobbed into his shirtless chest. Lewis’s heart broke even more as he heard you sob. His heart ached seeing you like this. He gently moved his hands from pinning down your wrists to holding them and intertwining his fingers with yours. “Of course you were. You are an amazing wife, the best wife in the world. I don’t deserve you. I don’t know why I did something so stupid. I can’t find an excuse. I’m so sorry” he said in a defeated tone, feeling ashamed for hurting you.

"Why didn't you just let me die, it would take away the shame and hurt and disappointment from both of us" I cried. Seeing you beg for such a thing shattered his heart even more. He shook his head, holding you tighter as he spoke with a shaky voice. “No. Please don’t say that. You can’t leave me. I can’t lose you. I’ll do anything to fix this so please don’t say things like that” he pleaded with me, not able to bear the thought of me dying so young. "I don't think it's fixable. Even if it is, how do we fix this. I've had the pain for so long and it got deeper with each year that I remained unsuccessful of giving you a child, you just pushed the knife right through down to the bottom" I sniffed while looking into his eyes that held so much love for me even after what he did.

His heart sank hearing all that. The guilt and shame he felt grew even more, knowing the pain I was going through. He felt complete remorse for his actions and the damage he caused. He leaned down, gently nuzzling his head beside mine, holding me tight as he spoke with a voice filled with remorse. "We can figure out a way to fix this. I don’t want to lose you. I never want to lose you. You’re the most important person in the world to me. I’ll do anything to make things right again”.

Too exhausted from the rage, I started to fall asleep as I felt Lewis exit the room. He then later returned with a first aid kit as he cleaned and bandaged each would, placing a kiss over each one he finished while I succumbed to sleep wondering how did my marriage turn out to be a shitshow.

[phagodyke]

and now I'm upset again I fucking give up

why was I fighting for my life trying to stay awake and failing at 4pm in the afternoon and now its 1:30am I cant fucking sleep at all :^/

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

@val-the-bun hits me with a padded sledge hammer in the feels with the wereharpy vaggie au thanks for that once again i inflict this ask on others as a coping mechanism >:C

val-the-bun asked:

Charlie can see the claw marks on Vaggie's side, golden blood, *angel* blood, dripping onto the floor... Her grip on the spear is shaking.

'Did you ever believe in me, Vaggie?'

Another shriek, weak and *crackling* is her only answer. Vaggie's talons fall, and she almost *leans* into the point of the spear. She can see the tears streaming down Vaggie's face.

The spear slips out of charlie's fingers. Her hands are shaking too much. She grabs Vaggie by the feathers, glaring up at her.

'Do you?'

Vaggie is *shaking*, taloned hands curling around Charlie with a *whimper*.

Charlie is clinging to Vaggie as the monster *buckles* around her. She lets out another whimper, nuzzling against her face. She cant keep her tail from curling around Vaggie, burying her face in those feathers she knows so well.

'Oh Vaggie...'

I am picturing a lot of comfort after this

Like just

Vaggie all bandaged up

And just curled up with Charlie in the lobby. And she's just gently brushing Vaggie's feathers.

'So uh, does anybody wanna explain why Vaggie Tales is doin' a heavenly werebird in hell?'

'I... I dont know. Maybe this is just... Maybe this is what happens if an exorcist stays down here?'

Eventually Vaggie starts changing back. Which, ya know, yay!

Aaaand also oh shit. Because uh. *She kind of shredded her outfit in her transformation*. And her spare one is back in what's left of the room she was holed up in.

'Oh, fuck. Uh. Blanket? Quick? PLEASE???'

Queue a very embarrassed and kind of ashamed Vaggie curled up in a *huge* blanket. But...Charlie's holding her. Vaggie may not think she deserves it, but she is.

'Please tell me I didnt try to eat anybody...'

'Oh, no my dear. Shreading on the other hand!'

Charlie gives Alastor a glare that surprisingly shuts him up. Meanwhile Vaggie has basically disappeared into the blanket, save the barest hint of white hair.

'Dont worry about it Vags, your aim was pretty shit.'

Queue a jab in the side from Husk.

'What! It's true! She missed!'

(Aaand that's all i got for this for now. Might do more in the future. Might write a fic. Who knows!)

[hotreadingwitch]

MADE TO LIE - the confession

Content Warnings/Kinks: praise kink, dominance, hickeys, scratching, cum swallowing/cum play, oral sex (female receiving), unprotected vaginal sex

BUCKY 

Bucky woke up to find the sun streaming in through the large, paned hotel window. Taking in a sleepy breath, he could barely believe how well this mission had worked out for him in the end. Though he’d almost been caught the night before, almost being forced to return to his life as the Winter Soldier, he’d also found someone who he valued as more than just a colleague or a teammate. The smile that painted his face when he turned over to see Y/n still sleeping, hair spread around her on the pillow in a messy halo and his shirt buttoned up over her frame, was both wide and pure. Last night, she’d insisted on wearing the oversized item, ignoring the fact that it looked more like a short dress on her than a shirt. He’d given in, of course, wanting her to have every comfort that she desired, especially with the complex pain he knew she must be feeling after the confrontation with the Cranes and her father. 

It took him just 10 minutes to get two coffees from a sweet barista at the cafe below the hotel and return to their suite. When he got back, Y/n was still asleep, likely exhausted. He placed the coffees on the bedside table before sitting on the edge, beside Y/n’s slumbering form. 

“Doll,” he woke her, with a gentle hand on her shoulder, his voice quiet and comforting. 

She swatted at him, her hand sharp and fast as a bullet but one that he dodged easily, mumbling grumpily, “Bucky…” 

“You’ve got to get up eventually doll, why not now?” 

“I never pegged you as a morning person” she smiled then, a small but genuine grin. 

A tense silence formed quickly in the echo of her words as her smile faltered, the events of the night before playing out in both their minds. 

“I think we should talk…” Bucky started. 

“About?” 

“Y/n…” 

“About what, Bucky?” she raised a shaky eyebrow, her calm mask cracking. 

Bucky sighed before pushing through, “About what your father sai—” 

“I don’t want to talk about that,” Y/n hesitated, interrupting before letting out a low whisper, “Talking about it will ruin everything Bucky, he ruins everything” 

He came towards her, his gaze soft, “Please doll, hear me out…If we decided to continue whatever this is I think you might be the best thing that could ever happen to me” Her sleepy eyes turned up to look at him hopefully, the sight practically breaking his heart as he pushed himself to continue, “…But I’d probably be the worst thing that could happen to you” 

“You’re wrong, you know that?” she whispered back bravely, “I’ve been through the worst already, there’s nothing you could do that could break me now…I want you Bucky, please” 

“That’s not exactly good Y/n” he sighed, frustrated but still speaking calmly, sadly, “You’ve been through so much that if I ruined your entire life you wouldn’t even blink an eye. That’s—that’s toxic. I don’t want to be the next thing that hurts you” 

“You won’t be” she stated plainly. 

“I’m not fully—“ he paused, “There’s still work I have to do before I’m good…what if I make a mistake that causes you more pain?”

“Then you’ll learn” 

He ran an exasperated hand through his cropped hair, grasping at straws, “I still have nightmares—what happens if you’re in my bed and I kill you in my sleep?”

“That’s a chance I’m willing to take” she replied strongly, “Listen, I can’t picture my future without you anymore…everybody needs somebody Bucky and you’re my somebody”

“But what if I—”

“I know Bucky, I know, okay? Do you think I don’t get what it’s like to make mistakes? To have done bad things? To have regrets?” she said, trying her best to keep her voice calm despite her jumping heart rate. She took his calloused hands in her own, and he let her, “I know what it’s like to be afraid of yourself, believe me. But we can do it together, learn how to be better together…I’m willing Bucky, you just have to trust me” 

He squeezed her hands with his own, searching her eyes, for what, even he didn’t know. 

“I’m afraid I won’t be able to be the man that you need, that you deserve, and that I’ll give my all to you and it still won’t be enough. I don’t want this to end in heartbreak.” His eyes softened, misty, yet without any tears falling like he was trying to keep himself together and failing miserably. That ball in his stomach was rolling around, wreaking havoc. And yet, Y/n’s words were making the feeling calmer by the second, making him feel like he could reach for what he wanted without fear for the first time. 

“It’s always going to be a risk” 

“I haven’t taken many of those in my life, not really, but all the brave people I know have. Steve. Sam. Natasha. You…” He paused, brushing her cheek gently with his knuckle. “You have, you’re so brave Y/n, more brave than you could ever know.” 

“It’s always going to be a risk Bucky” she repeated quietly, her words striking him at his core. 

“I’ve lived a long and loveless life Y/n,” he rasped with a wet chuckle, continuing even when she opened her mouth to interrupt, “No, listen, please. Yes, I’ve had good friends and good family but never…love, not like this. I don’t want to give up on us doll—So maybe I can be brave for you if you let me, and we’ll be alright?” 

“We will be, I know it” She leaned toward him, hesitating before planting a gentle kiss on his stubbly cheekbone. 

“How?” he huffed with a small smile, having already admitted defeat. 

“I just do” she kissed his cheek again, “I just do…” 

Y/N 

His lips touched her forehead in one intimate motion before he trailed down to her mouth, capturing her in a kiss that she’d likely never forget. 

Her hands traced down from the sturdy contour of his jaw to his neck to his chest to his arms, metal and flesh, barely able to keep her hands off of him. His gaze pierced her before he tucked his lips to the crook of her neck, making her groan at the sensation. There was heat between them, sure, a heat that was quickly growing from a small flame into a full, blazing fire but it was the warmth in Bucky’s eyes, the unabashed trust, and the grounding feeling she gained from each kiss, that truly made her feel red-hot. 

She pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it to the side before he began to unbutton his own shirt that she was still wearing from the night before. The cool air hit her nipples, making them peak. They kissed and kissed and kissed, Y/n reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck as they did, groaning into his mouth. When she finally pulled back, her eyes scanned over his body, taking his armour off piece by imaginary piece. It felt good—being vulnerable with him, touching him—so good that she felt the full-bodied sense of love settling deep in her bones. 

“Please don’t make me wait any longer” she begged, her hands grazing the band of his pants as she sat down on the bed’s edge, him towering over her. 

“The coffees are going to go cold…” he hesitated with a shy smirk. 

“I don’t care” she breathed as Bucky sunk to his knees. 

She spread her legs instinctively, needing his mouth on her more than she needed anything. In that moment, she thought she’d take a single orgasm from him over her own happiness, though, she had a feeling that he’d never leave her without either, pleasure or joy, ever again. 

“Please” her whimpered plea was desperate yet unashamed. 

When he connected his mouth to her it sent a sharp feeling instantly through her body, one that went straight to her clit. 

“Fuck” she gasped, immediately gripping her hands in his short hair. 

He kissed the sensitive area, looking up at her, “That feel good doll?” 

She ground her hips upward, arching to meet his soft lips. 

“Yes—shit—yes, it feels so good Bucky”

He chuckled darkly before reconnecting to her, his tongue sweeping over her wet hole before moving up toward her clit. He used his strong fingers to part her lips, spreading them so that he had better access to the sensitive area. He started slow, licking at her languidly, making her breath hitch and her hips buck upward restlessly. But Y/n’s low whines and her tight grip on his hair made him go faster and faster as if he couldn’t resist giving her the pleasure she craved until his tongue was moving so quickly back and forth it was a blur across her clit. 

“I can’t get over how good you taste doll—fuck” he groaned as he lapped lower with his tongue, teasing her needy hole before returning to her clit. 

She arched again, shivering at the way the slight change in angle made the feeling of his licking at her clit even more intense. 

“I can’t take—fuck—please Bucky, I need you in me now”

Removing his mouth from her, he took his fingers and caressed her sopping hole. Holding it up to the light, he groaned at the sight of her wetness. Y/n looked down, gulping as she noticed the hard, strained bulge waiting in his pants. Her eyes widened even more then, pupils blown with pure desire, as he brought her slick to his lips, tasting her without shame. “You really do taste so good” he chuckled, smiling handsomely when the comment made her flush.

His fingers returned to her hole, gently moving them around and around without once pushing into her. His small smile was dangerous. 

“You’re ready to take it doll?” he questioned, kissing her inner thigh as he teased her.

She shivered in response, whining his name, “Bucky…” 

“I asked you a question” he glared from below, his dominance taking over, “Don’t make me ask you again”

“Yes” she rushed her response, “I want it, please Bucky, I need to feel you inside me” 

He praised her skin with his mouth, tracing sloppy kisses down her neck to the space between her breasts before finally removing his pants and positioning himself in front of her. Her legs wrapped around him as she balanced her ass on the edge of the massive bed.

“You’re sure?” 

“Yes—God, Bucky if you don’t—“ 

Her words fell off in an instant as he slid the first half of himself into her. She’d somehow forgotten just how big he was, letting out a hiss and a loud moan at the immediate feelings of pleasure. 

“You’re so fucking tight around me doll” he spat out, his voice a low growl.

He was only halfway in her and still, she clenched around him desperately, needing more, more, more. 

“Deeper, deeper please” she begged.

With a huff he pushed deep into her until he was fully seated inside, her walls squeezing around him. 

“F—fuck” he growled, his breathing heavy as he started to thrust.

The feeling of his full length slamming into her was overwhelming, to say the least. It was heat and tension and desperation and adoration all mixed together. She rocked her hips along with his in perfect rhythm, moving completely in sync with him. Her breath hitched as he ground into her, placing his hands, both flesh and metal on her hips. The more she arched the better he felt inside her like he was reaching parts of her that she didn’t even know were there.

“Hold on…” he commanded, his voice dark as he thrust and thrust, “Hold onto me doll—fuck”

She reached her hands around him, scratching them down his back, making him growl. He pushed further into her, the weight of him between her legs made them spread even wider. She arched, groaning as he returned his lips to her neck, sucking, leaving a trail of marks behind, marks that declared she was his. 

“Bucky” she moaned, lost to the haze of the pleasure, “I need—“ 

In an instant his fingers were on her clit sliding back and forth across her wet pussy, beginning to please her just how he knew she liked it. His thrusts were harsh and full of need, hers as much as his. Her gaze flitted upward, startling at the pure desire that was reflected in his eyes. It felt good to be pleasured, to be worshipped by him. 

“From the moment my lips touched your body—fuck—from the moment I met you” he whispered with reverence, planting kisses down the length of her neck, “I’ve known you were the one”

“I—Bucky,” she cried out, her words interrupted by her moans. 

“Tell me doll, let me hear it,” he groaned, eyes fiery. 

“I feel the same way…about you” she whimpered, feeling her release coming closer and closer Her hands grazed over his body, over his arms—one cool metal under her fingertips and the other truly warmer than the sun, “You’ve always been the one for me” 

Bucky thrust down into her as his fingers fiercely rubbed over her clit, bringing her closer and closer to the edge, all while kissing her neck, her jaw, and her forehead. 

“Bucky” she moaned, her breathing laboured. 

“I can feel you cumming” he strained, brushing a stray hair from her face in one intimate swipe, “so fucking tight—such a good girl for me”

She tensed before the sensitivity ricocheted through her entire being, making her chest and legs shake beneath him as he gripped her waist while the other hand played with her clit. As she came it felt like dying, an intense, body-rocking death that was quickly followed by the most glorious of rebirths. Bucky came just after her and Y/n held his shoulders as he did, supporting him like he had held her, his deep, breathy moans tickling her ear. 

“Fuck, fuck” he groaned before collapsing beside her. 

She straddled him then, easing on top of him, mindful of his still slick cock throbbing below her, leaning forward to kiss him. His strong hands ran up the length of her back, practically cradling her as he kissed her back. 

“Thank you” she whispered, feeling fully satiated and hopeful for their future.

“Thank you, doll” he kissed her cheek. Pushing her hair back again out of her face, properly gazing at her with love and affection, both their hearts feeling full. 

Bucky and Y/n’s relationship was delicate. One wrong move could cause disaster but it seemed that neither of them really cared anymore. They both knew well then that everything is always a risk. They knew too that love, true love, was one worth taking. 

A/N - This is the last chapter of this mini-series/novella!! Thank you all for so much love with this, I'll be forever grateful that the chapters have been so well-received here and on Wattpad. The epilogue chapter will be on Christmas Day or the day after!

requested account tags: cjand10 identity2212 bucky-jbb-sunshine unaxv hnnhbananananana @differenttyphoonwerewolf

[ochrearia]

This will update in time, but for now all I have

I don't have the courage to post this myself so this will probably be scheduled for some horrendous time at night. I also don't have the courage to point out who is who because I'm scared maybe they won't like how they sound, though maybe if I go into detail too hard it might be possible to tell. Lol. This isn't everyone yet. I still need some more time to see who everyone is, blah blah blah, bunch of stupid abstract brain stuff, but. Playlist of my friends I've made here... yeah

Wounds- doesn't count because that's me. Decided to put it there because why not. I don't need to talk about myself let's be real no one cares about that

Norduris. Funny, somehow right away this was you. I love when that happens, when a song just reacts so strongly with the whole person in my head I'm searching for. Everything I've seen of you screams this song and it's. Beautiful to me. Always is but it doesn't get tiring. So much of you seems like it was locked away and buried in worry. Wistful thinking and hoping for the future. There is so much good in you. I think I'll stick around for as long as I can to help you see that. Kind and comforting. Creative and inspired just about every time I've seen you, I think. But I think you worry too much. There's fear and anger in there and I think, maybe, I wish there didn't have to be. Well, not the unjustified ones at least. But it all pools together for a strength that I think fits you. Still hopeful and still going. I like that about people... That might be a recurring theme for everyone really. But it's still you, too. Such slow waltzing shades of gray, like fog and the cover of rain. Pastel yellow like the sun, deep, deep green accompanying the rest. There you are, Kry.

Lost. You know the song titles don't really mean anything before you might ask. I never take it into account. Just the way it sounds. I also think you worry far too much but then again you've gone through for too much. But you are creative, and fun, and uplifting. Think you have a little bit of a habit of subduing yourself in fear of something I never quite know. But you are patient, so patient and I value that a lot. Especially when it's given to me. Nervous at times, needing permission before letting yourself shine. Wisdom about you that sometimes I really need to hear. You really know how to rile someone up in a playful way and I don't think enough people play into such things anymore. Wonderful to see really. Like a slow stream in a still air, deep, deep gray and neon blue. Streaks of white too, liminal in a way that reminds me of a barren tundra with nothing to be seen in any direction. Nothing but you. Hey there, Gold <3

daydream. Augh, I feel like my brain is stalling over how to put everything I have seen into words. Something about you just feels so positive, an upbeat air to you even if you're not feeling okay. You're still there, and I see you. Confident a lot of the time, and it's well warranted I believe. Other times not so much. Kind and caring like everyone I know here is, and a childlike excitement every time we talk that I do adore. God you know so well how to make other people excited with you. And you care, so much, I know everyone does but there's something about it with you that's just... electric, is the word I think. There's different styles of care but that one is yours. Funny. I think you make me feel safe in all the fucked up ways my own mind will talk to me. Maybe it's because I think we have a lot of similarities. It's always been positive with you, even when it isn't because you make caring about you easy. You know how the light of the sun shimmers on a body of water? That's kind of how you move, a sweet caramel brown and autumn orange, little drops of red about your air. So wonderful to meet you, Karl.

demise. Again, I swear the titles do not come into play with this. I suppose there's only so much I can repeat about someone being kind, caring, and fun before it starts feeling less special. I promise that never happens, no matter how many people I know like that in my life. Especially when your style of caring is just so... calming. And determined. Offering so much to people you care about even if maybe they haven't earned it yet. That doesn't seem to matter to you. You're giving it anyways. You're a giver, I suppose. You do a lot of creating and it's stunning. And you offer so much to others because you want to. Able to make people feel safe and like they matter. Love the mischief you get up to a lot too. Dedicated to so many things. Greens of jade and pastel grass, white all between them like a snow flurry. A bit of silvery undertones. I'm glad that I get to know you Shed.

Night Beacon. I held off for a few days more before considering you because I wanted to be accurate. There is something to be said about being quiet, in a sense that is positive and not whatever I say when talking about myself. A good kind of quiet, maybe mellow is the word I am looking for. I like when my friends are passionate and you are no exception. A certain type of calmness that I can't quite explain. I think there is a kindness in your ability to just exist and that may not make, sense, but it's the best I can say. You tough through a lot of things you might not want to do but there's a strength in that. And of course, you are creative. I make friends with creatives a lot. I think maybe you are the kind of person I would pick first to surround myself with. Chill overall that can swap into a more serious frame of mind whenever needed, knowing how to navigate around vibes and situations while being kind. And still someone who is enthusiastic about things you like in a way that isn't overwhelming. It's nice. Might put you on a loop more often than I should, lol. Peach and bright orange, with yellow mixed in with it. Along with a pretty desaturated beige, the best I can put it. Literally like the air of the world during a sunset. You should be proud of that Isaac.

Autumn Afternoon. I'd like to think you quite pleasant and lively despite your words of "This group space of which I have butted in". Who cares if you did do that? You butted in and we let you because we wanted to. You belong here with us, and with me. In my head singing sweetly the soul of who you are. You worry a lot. Hey, I do too. Maybe we both definitely worry too much. Being anxious kinda sucks. But you know what? Here you are anyway. You worry about your place but you still sit here and take it. That's wonderful strength and you might say "I owe it to everyone else" but you are still here. You have a lot going on that tries to work against you. A lot of us do too, if not all of us. But you power through anyway. Underneath all that anxiety sits so much passion. Excitement for things you like. You're a damn good artist and a life to have around. Pastel lime and steel blue, dancing like petals swept into the wind of faded silver, hinted with aqua blue. Yeah. You're a wonderful one there, Storm.

[pinkboss55]

OK, the last one for @artsybun

This time featuring ANGST!!!

Usagi fond Leo floating on top of the water covered in fishing nets. Panicked, he tried to untie his friend, but Leo's tail was especially tangled up and injured. Ropes had bruised his scales. Fresh open wounds are a sign of a struggle. Maybe he swam too close to the local fishing spot? No, no, he's done this SO many times he KNOWS to avoid them! What happened? One of the wounds goes right through his tail, clearly punctured all the way through. Was he targeted? So many things raced through poor Usagi's head as he pulled his friend onto his little boat and pulled him into shallow water, all the wile tiers streaming down his face, screaming for his Ant, and try to comfort his best friend the best he could. Even if he didn't know if Leo could hear him or not.

"Itokit'sgoingtobeok! You're going to be OK! I got you! Everything is fine! . . . Please, please be okay. . ."

It's more for himself, really.

Note that this is not canon to @artsybun 's Mermaid & Pirate au, but I'd thought I'd add my last little brain rot before I make fan art of a different Rise au. So here are some final thoughts about this drawing in particular.

I don't really know about the world building in this au. (Outside of the relationship between the boys) So a lot of this is interpretation and personl head canons of the au. So if I end up wrong, I'll probably edit this in the future.

The idea is that Usagi and his Ant live on a boat house, traveling and trading between small islands with little settlements. There is one island that is deemed "safe" enough to stop there frequently and stay for long periods of time. That's where the two accidentally meet.

I'm not sure how the law works or how they inforce if. I imagine it's like Pirates of the Caribbean, where the Royal British navy just went around being assholes and "maintaining order." Like that, but whatever equivalent this au has.

Maybe a smaller group of those guys just so happen to see poor Leo on the way to see his friend and wanted to "inform" him of the rules. Or maybe it really was a fisherman that really didn't like "his kind" and wanted to be cruel. It's kinda left for interpretation.

One more thing. Leo's mermaid half is a shark, and sharks need to keep moving in order to breathe. This doesn't apply to all sharks, and Leo is also half Red eared slider that are semi aquatic, so this might not apply to him at all. But it just makes the idea more angsty that the net Leo was trapped in limited his movement after he got away from his would-be killer and passed out from exhaustion trying to get to a safe place and almost drowning.

Screenshot reference from Ponyo

[crisiscutie]

Hiya, sweetie! 💜

may I ask for a prompt for your Domestic AU, please? It's something that happens very early when Darling and Sephy just managed to settle down after they finally escaped Shinra.

Darling is pregnant with her firstborn and of course, the anxiety runs high on both sides. But there's one night where she couldn't sleep and decided to go into the living room by herself. Her doubts, if she was even able to become a good mother, plagued her mind... it was one of those nights where such emotional turmoil hits unexpectedly hard out of nowhere. Of course, Sephiroth is instantly on high alert when he noticed that she's not sleeping beside him anymore, so he decides to look for her and finds her eventually, crying.

How would he approach and comfort her?

Thank you so much in advance and keep up with your amazing work, sweetie 💜

Thank you, I love you so much, my wonderful friend and supporter. This is for you~!

Pairing: Fluffy Sephiroth/Domestic Darling

Content Warning: None.

Sephiroth's heart sank as he noticed the empty space beside him on the bed. His slit eyes narrowed as he sat up slowly.

He couldn't help but assume the worst. It's an unfortunate carryover from his past SOLDIER life.

He knows you wouldn't abandon him, as he wouldn't do to you, yet the storm of emotions within still raged, thundering in his chest.

With a stern face, he slowly rose out of bed, feeling the temptation to summon his Masamune.

Sephiroth's darkness whispered to him, urging him to keep you close, for who knows if one day you might actually leave him?

Gritting his teeth, he raised a hand to his temple, determined to ignore the dark whispers.

When he found you in the living room, tears streaming down your face, his expression softened.

His heart simultaneously soared with relief, grateful that you hadn't deserted him, yet it also felt heavy with tinges of sorrow at seeing you in such distress.

Sephiroth sat aside you, his caring eyes never leaving you as you quietly sobbed. His thumb came forward, tenderly wiping away your tears.

"Darling, what's wrong?" He whispered, pulling you into his embrace.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, your voice quivering as you struggled to speak. But the weight of your sorrow was too heavy, and your sobs erupted loud.

"Don't worry, I'm here for you. Always..." Sephiroth cooed, slightly he gently swayed back and forth, cradling you in his strong arms.

You melted into his arms, the lingering fragrance of lavender from his hair wrapped around you.

Finally, after a while, you whispered your worries to him about the future, your fears of failing as a mother to your unborn child and as a wife to him.

He only listened to your words, passing on no judgement. He felt a pang of guilt, realizing how much emotional labor you have done for him. He was silent for some time, struggling to find his words before he spoke again.

"You've done so much for me, my love," he whispered, his voice soft and tender. "You introduced me to a life outside of Shinra, a life I had always yearned for," he continued, his voice filled with emotion as his hand gently caressed your pregnant belly. "When they turned their backs on me, you remained by my side... I know that your love will extend effortlessly to our little one."

He tenderly lifted your chin, ensuring your eyes met his as he spoke, "We're in this together, right? I want to love you just as you love me." His lips curved into a gentle smile.

You returned the smile, assuring him you are in this together, and you won't keep your struggles hidden from him any longer.

You two spent the rest of the night wrapped in each other's embrace, refusing to let go.

Because you two were one, bound as lovers, friends, and soulmates.

[midoriima]

family line | ushijima wakatoshi

[!!!] toxic/physically & emotionally abusive mother, (fem! she/her) reader is a parent-child, mentions of scars & bruises, implications of r@p3. ib maquia: when the promised flower blooms, read at your own discretion cos it might hit close to home, this is kinda a vent after all.

There was nothing special in particular about this evening. Wakatoshi had just finished washing up and is now getting ready to drift off to sleep, as you are in the next room, but when his head hits his pillows, he begins to remember a few blurry memories.

"He is your responsibility! Your ___ is your responsibility so you have to take care of him because I'm busy!" You'd told him he hit his head really hard one time when he was younger, hence why he can't remember the exact words, voices, or faces, but one thing he remembered with that statement was he saw you.

He'd remembered this a few times, but only now did he realize that he did see you. He was very small compared to you but one thing that didn't sit right with him everytime he thought about it was that you looked young.

He always brushed it off as, 'she must have had me when she was young,' but now that he can remember a little clearly, you looked incredibly young and it disturbed him. You looked weak, covered in scars and bruises here and there, and while you were "matured," you definitely did not look like one.

Was she... no, he shook his head, anything but those assumptions, if it ever were the case, he's not sure he'd be able to keep his hands from ruining whoever did it.

He thought some more, it was future schoolwork but he didn't want to stress himself out with it. But right as he closed his eyes, tears fell. Ah, another memory,

You were dressing him up in nightclothes, you carried him on one arm, turned the lights off and tucked yourselves into the comfy sheets of the bed. It was a rather cold night. It was always at least a little chilly every night but this particular night was cold.

"---, I'm cold..." His younger self complained, shivering and curling into a ball, his forehead hitting your shoulder and when he feels the warmth of your body, he inches closer, expecting you to embrace him.

For some reason, he just can't seem to remember what he called you. Surely it had to be 'mum,' because what else?

"Oh! Then, can we cuddle? Only if you're alright with it. I can always get more blankets." He shook his head at your response, "cuddles, please." And that's what happened.

He remembers how he would always crave your attention. Your praises and affection always got him going, that's why he always smiled with you. But he gets angry when you get hurt and also cry when you cry, trying to comfort you like you do with him as streams of tears slowly fall and sobs escape his lips.

I'm very lucky my mother is a good one, he thinks to himself in the midst of reminiscing. You weren't perfect, of course, but unlike other mothers, all the good things you've done for him overwhelms your mistakes as his parent figure.

About to drift off to dreamland, he ponders once more,

Who's his dad? Where is he now? What happened with you? Why did he leave? Or, at least, why is he not here with you?

These questions got him staying up a little later. He wonders how young you two might have been when you had him if you looked that young in his memories. Or maybe you just looked really young?

That said, you always avoided telling him your age. He's sure he's the only son in this galaxy who doesn't know the age of his mother. And that said, why do you avoid it?

He thinks you might really have been young and were too ashamed, he guessed, to say because you might think his attitude towards you would shift once he knew but he reassured you in his own thoughts that he wasn't going to do that.

@midoriima i don't remember the exact details of how i wanted this to go nor do i remember why i wrote this or what message i wanted to to convey but i do remember this was written as a way to vent in the form of fanfic and not entirely alike what i felt or experienced at that time.

also, go check out more on my masterlists cos these partial works are open for any continuation or derivatives, etc. but on one condition: ask permission 🤗 that's allll

[tayshifts]

Extra things I scripted into my MHA DR

Some are safety related and some are for my convenience as i was worried about them

Mosquitoes, lice, ticks, fleas, cockroaches, silverfish, and bed bugs don’t exist.

There is no rape in my DR.

There is no racism or racial prejudice.

There is no homophobia and no transphobia. There are no surgical requirements for transgender people to be able to change their gender legally. No ban on same sex marriage or same sex adoption. Equal fucking rights. LOVE IS LOVE BITCH

I take Mineta’s place in Class 1-A. Mineta is not in my DR.

UA has always had the dorms.

I have enough money to always live comfortably. UA provides all students with stipends

No one in my Class or Class B will die.

Midnight will not die

Present Mic will not die

All Might will not die

Eraserhead will not die

There is no hero licensing exam. We are given our licenses at the discretion of our teachers at our school, based on when they think we are ready for them. Class 1-A and 1-B all receive hero licenses after the events at the Training Camp and Kamino.

TikTok exists in my DR, younger heroes often have their own TikTok accounts to gain popularity.

Current music exists in my DR

We speak English at school but everyone is fluent in both english and japanese

I cannot be expelled

The Hero Support course develops a fabric for Hagakure so that she can wear something during hero work and still retain her invisibility. AKA used her hair as a base like they did for Mirio

Hagakure can also control when she is invisible and since her hero quirk will be similar to Mirio’s in concept, it will turn invisible with her

I do not know the plot as it will play out beyond where I enter my DR. For example, I will not know about the attack on the Camp prior to the attack starting

There is no Covid-19 in my DR

We have the same homeroom teacher for all three years at UA.

UA has professional therapists to help hero students cope with stress and emotions that come with hero training. These therapists can make sure students in need of mental health counseling and medication receive the proper care. (Amajiki)

UA is a college and all students are 20 upon entering their first year at UA, no matter the program.

Eri is not aged up, despite all other characters being aged up. She is still a child.

I will always remember my classmates and their hero names

Spotify Premium is just how spotify works in my DR, for free

UA gives students access to all streaming platforms. Netflix, Disney, HBO, Hulu, etc

Squishmallows has ProHero squishmallows

Sir Nighteye doesn’t die. He is injured but he and All Might will reconcile and All Might will finally explain why he couldn’t give the quirk to Mirio

The War Arc doesn’t happen, there is a better solution

Instead of the Licensing Exam, we do interschool training exercises to promote working together in the future and being exposed to other future heroes, not just our class or school’s.

I have the right adaptors/chargers/etc for outlets used in Japan

The zombie ova doesn’t happen

I understand the metric system

I understand the yen to US dollar conversion and my banking is set up when I arrive, so I don’t need to worry about it

We have the same dorm building all three years, they just change the signage to signify what year we’re in

Each dorm room has its own private bathroom. There are still the communal baths

Fatphobia is a no <3

Hidden cameras in public and nonpublic spaces aren't a thing.

The toilets are like the ones in America

ADHD/stimulant drugs are legal. I have no issues getting any of my needed medications in Japan and can get them easily from local pharmacies

Stronger Western deodorants are available in Japan, easy to find

[wildpeachfarm]

not dooming but ive read a few opinions in reddit about how caitis change of story in her recent stream is similar to her first statement, just that she flat out said what happened instead of vagueing it and what george said about not explaining further because she might not be comfortable is about that

i didnt really think of it that way tbh, i thought that was about that drinking game they played or whatever. i don't know if it changes anything because her credibility is down the drain at this point

Honestly I don't think it really changes much about how things were initially handled imo.

Like george still took full accountability, and apologized profusely as well as Dream and committed to changing his behavior in the future to make sure this never happens again. I don't think much would have changed about his responses if caiti is telling the truth and that is what happened. Because even if breast-touching happened (which would be wild that no one else noticed especially ghosti who was meant to be keeping an eye on her), he still committed to taking accountability and learning from this and correcting his future behavior which is the best case scenario in my mind.

I personally also thought george said he would not explain further because of the sexual experience thing, and tbh I still think that is what he was referring to. I think people might just be bringing it up now as confirmation bias but idk I'm not george, I don't know what he was meaning when he said that.

The reality is that if this is what happened, you have to decide for yourself if this changed anything for you. And that is going to depend on your own experiences. Personally, this new information does not change my opinion that much and like you said, I still don't even know if i can trust what she says 100%

something I'm also going to add here is a reddit discussion on consent w/ caiti because there are some interesting thoughts here that Brittany also brought up previously- just so people can explore all perspectives:

[followmetoyourdoom]

So inspired by this post from @jak2gooberglub and this art by @preservedcucumbers I've written a shortish post-Jak 3/Jak X late night Jak musings about the what ifs and what he regrets, and then Daxter comforting him in the way only Daxter can - calling him a moron.

Rated T: swearing and mentions of blood.

Might put this up on ao3 but for now, under the read more:

It's late. He's tired. He's wired with thoughts about what could have been and what futures could have changed.

His father was there the entire time. Just outside the city walls.

What if he had waited? What if he had known sooner? What if he could have returned Mar to his father and he had grown up with him?

Jak allows himself to imagine it for a few blissful seconds. The training his father would have passed down, the honour. He could have grown up to be the leader Spargus needed him to be instead of refusing the throne. He could have spent more time with his father. He could have felt his love and pride for longer than those few short months. Yes, the Wasteland was harsh, but the cell walls and the experiments were harsher.

When did he get to have what he wanted? World be damned.

He gets up, a ball of frustration, and begins to pace, back and forth and back and forth, until he stops in front of his mirror.

What's happened to him?

You have. The answer comes ringing into his head as clear as the Light that keeps the Dark at bay. He's done this to himself.

It's by his own hand that he sent his younger version back in time to re-live the same shitty reality he was going through now. Why did he do that? To a child? Everything that's happened since he got to Haven City he can blame squarely on his own shoulders. Avoid the wumpbee nest. Yeah right, like that's the main thing the kid has to worry about.

He's no better than the Shadow trying to send that poor kid into Mar's Tomb.

His fist finds the indent in the wall from previous nightly musings and his head finds the crack in the mirror.

Jak winces in pain and leans back, watches as a thin stream of blood slowly drips down his forehead. Good, he deserves it. What good ever came out of his actions?

"Can't sleep, huh tough guy?"

The voice knocks him back into reality and he looks down as Daxter patters into the room.

Daxter. His friend. His partner in crime. The one he turned into an ottsel, the one he dragged into this mess. The one that could have just had a regular life without him in it, growing up in Sandover Village without him.

Of course, he can't just ruin his own life, right? He has to drag others down with him.

"Helloooo? Earth to Jak?"

There's a familiar jolt to his shoulder as Daxter hops up, but Jak ignores the hand waving in front of his face for a moment.

Still staring at himself in the mirror, he speaks up. "Are you happy here, Daxter?"

Daxter frowns. "Here specifically?" He leans back, elbow resting on Jak's head. "Well I'd rather be asleep curled up with my little tootsie roll Tess, but some big jerk punched the wall and woke me up."

"I mean here in Haven City."

"City of fast cars, faster women and even faster death threats? Eh, 60/40," he waves his hand, "happy as I can be."

Jak smudges blood across the side of his face. "You wouldn't have preferred to be back in Sandover, as yourself, without me in your life?"

Daxter tilts his head. "You're in one of those fucked up 'I'm the problem and to blame for everything' mood, ain't'cha?" He sighs. "Look buddy, I am myself and... I dunno, life would be pretty boring without you and pretty sad without Tess. Would it be more peaceful? Sure. Would I have less fur? Probably. Would I be less itchy? Absolutely. But I wouldn't give this up for the world.

"You're not the only one who's had to sacrifice what they want to save the world, y'know? This ain't all on you tough guy, so snap out of it. Please," the last word is mumbled. "No one gets to hurt my best friend, and that includes my best friend."

"I just... Miss him." He plonks down on the bed.

Daxter knows exactly who Jak means. "I know. But if you hadn't grown up in the past, then you wouldn't have gone back to the future and been around to stop Kor."

Jak shoots him a look.

"What?" He jumps off to stand next to Jak. "It makes sense. It would just be baby you who would have had his life juices or whatever sucked out by Kor's giant pincer things," Daxter gnashes his hands together dramatically to make his point, the entire conversation now aided by sweeping gestures. "So you die, Kor destroys or takes over Haven City, and sure as hell Spargus wouldn't have lasted long after that. Damas wouldn't stand by and watch his city burn, so he'd fight back, probably lose, and then you're in the same situation you're in now." Daxter's hands fall limp after their performance. "You had to go back, it was the right choice, fucked up as it is."

"I didn't have a choice as a little kid. Why did I choose for him? Why didn't I just ask what he wanted?"

Daxter rolls his eyes. "Hm yeah okay let's roleplay that for a second. You be you, I'll be younger you. Don't look at me like that, we're doing this, I'm going to show you how stupid you sound."

"Fine." Jak turns to him. "Hey, kid. Do you want to into the past and live in a shitty little village and then get tortured the minute you land back here and also have no memory of-"

"You're doing it wrong! I'll be you, you just be quiet." Daxter clears his throat and puts his hands together, poining at an invisible object. "Hey, kid. Through that portal is a quiet village. It's not much, you'll learn the lay of the land pretty quickly and you'll have a few chores here and there to do. But, and this is the really good part, you meet this amazingly handsome totally cool friend who... Who didn't really have friends until you showed up." Daxter shuffles his feet. "You end up taking him under your wing and he takes you under yours. He doesn't care that you don't talk and you don't care that he never stops talking. You balance each other out. You're partners. You'll be there for each other through thick and thin and you'll always, always, find each other and save each other. No matter what.

"So, whaddaya say, kid? Wanna go meet your best friend?"

Jak sits there quietly.

Daxter sniffs. "Yeah you look pretty fucking stupid now, don'tcha."

"Shut up."

Daxter gently punches his arm. "Never. You know I can't."

"Thanks, Dax."

"No problem, buddy. Let's get some sleep."

Jak grumbles and starts settling down into bed. Then there's a tail in his face and an ottsel on his chest. "What're you doing, Dax?"

"Getting some sleep, duh."

The tail flicks his nose and Jak brushes it away. "I thought you wanted to get back to Tess?"

"She'll have taken over the whole bed by now, nah, I'll stay here."

Jak smiles softly, the darkness allowing him to show his vulnerable side, if just for a moment. "Just like the good old times, hey Dax?"

Daxter makes a few biscuits and finally curls up. "Just like the good old times," he says sleepily.

[ddlcpoly]

A lot happened that day, so much that I was really scared of coming to the club. That night I spoke with MC about what happened with Monika and Yuri and then he told me what happened with Natsuki. We then spoke more honestly than ever, eventually learning that we both were in love with the rest of the club.

Now I already had a sneaking suspicion that everyone in the club was crushing on everyone else, but I honestly thought it was just me having hopeful thinking that I could start a polyamorous relationship with all of them and was just connecting things that weren’t there to delude myself.

But after talking it over and how at least Monika and Yuri like me and how Natsuki liked MC, it all started to seem so obvious. The way Monika spoke so freely about how much she admired and cared for all of us, how Yuri always was sneaking glances at everyone every time she could, how MC still got nervous at times when spending time alone with one us or how Natsuki seemed to blush at little bit every day at the club. I knew what I had to do then, I had to help the club back together and we all needed to be honest to do that.

I open my mouth “I want all of us to be perfectly honest. We all made mistakes that day, but I think that’s mostly that we were always so prone to mistakes.” I awkwardly chuckle “We all hid our feelings from each other because of the fear of hurting one another, but that only caused all of us to get more hurt” Natsuki starts squirming in her seat as she continues to look down, MC keeps staring at me with his always-present blank expression, but I know he is also worried, Monika stares at her desk probably beating herself up in her mind still and Yuri starts shaking nervously “So now I think the only course of action we can all take in order to be able to continue being happy with one another is by being honest.” I take a deep breath, hesitating on whether or not to say what I’m about to say, it’s something that once said I can’t take back and might be problematic in the future. But I trust them and I know this is the best thing I could say right now…

 “I love all of you. I love how diligent Monika is, I love how passionate Yuri is, I love how patient MC is, I love how fiery Natsuki is, Ilove how we can all come together and create a place where I can feel truly happy and loved and I don’t want to lose that!” I start to choke up as a stream of tears start falling down from my eyes.

“I love you too Sayori, I love all of you.” Surprisingly it’s Yuri who says this, her eyes also filled with tears. “I’ve never felt like I belonged anywhere, but this club, no, all of you have become a place of comfort and joy. Every single one of you have accepted me as I am and have treated me with such warmth and care that I can barely keep up with. I wish for all of you to remain a permanent part of my life and if possible, not just as friends.”

“Yeah” Natsuki is the next to speak up “You bundle of idiots somehow squirmed your way deep into my heart and I, well, y’know. I feel the same as Yuri and Sayori.” She sits back down unable to say anything else.

MC stands up “I will be completely honest, I joined the club because I thought all of you were cute.” He confesses, “We all know that, you idiot.” Natsuki retorts “Even with your unchanging face, it was extremely obvious.” “Oh…” he seems slightly disappointed in himself. “Well, that’s not the point I was trying to make, even if the reason I joined was, admittedly, pretty shallow, I stayed because you girls have been the people I have been closest to in the world. I don’t think I could have the same kind of bond with anyone else and I don’t want to lose that. I also love each and every one of you.”

We all start to stare at Monika who is still seated on her desk, frantically redirecting her stare between the four of us, blushing heavily “Eh? G-Guys we shouldn't j-joke about things like that. If this is a prank to get back at me, you guys did it and I probably deserve it.”

The mood sours after Monika says that “Y-YOU IDIOT!” Natsuki yells out, even more tears coming out of her eyes “I-I would never say shit like that as a joke. I’m not that kind of person.” Yuri puts a hand on her shoulder trying to comfort her “I-I understand this might be difficult to understand. To be frank, I haven’t fully processed what is happening at this moment. But I do know that my feelings are true.” Monika just stares at them in shock.

“Look Monika,” MC looks at her determined. “I’ve always admired you and I even had a crush on you when we shared a class together. But getting to know you has made me fall deeper for you, so please believe me.”

“It’s true.” I say “We all love you Monika, do you love us back?” Monika’s eyes start to tear up to which she covers them up with her hands and in the softest voice I’ve ever heard come out of Monika’s mouth she says “yes…”

I sense the mood of the room is starting to significantly cheer up now. “So, what are we supposed to do now?” Natsuki “It’s not like we can date each other now, right?” Natsuki asks.  I immediately respond “Well, actually…”

The rest of the afternoon we spent talking about what happened at that day in the festival, apologizing and forgiving each other, and I eventually brought up what I had planned, I discussed it with MC back when we were discussed our feelings for our friends, and let’s just say, everyone came out of that room with at least 2 more partners.

4/4

Fin

[dwtdog]

im really really stressed about how it will go,

i dont i just, support system wise i have almost nothing

these guys are kinda it and one person whos neutral

its just the aftermath, i dont know if everything will be okay and i get so stressed about it

my tummy issues been fucking me up man

anon :( i'll do my best to give u some general advice, but if u need anything please don't be afraid to dm me <3

the thing that really helps me through these type of situations is sitting with myself and thinking okay, what's the most likely thing that's going to happen, and how am i going to feel about that.

to start with what i think will be the outcome, the only things we know for certain that are going to happen are caiti's final statement/stream, and george's final statement.

based on what caiti has said, her final stream is going to be more general, and i assume she's going to discuss the problems with misogyny within the mcyt space, or something similar, along with the future of her content. i do not think she will say anything more directly about the situation, and if she does i don't think it will be new information, except to maybe clear up the story ghostie told

for george's statement, judging by what the rational sides of the internet are calling for and his most recent tweet, i think he is going to give a sincere apology, no matter what form that may come in, along with some sort of private, personal apology to caiti that we may never see. some people will accept what he has to say, and others will continue to call him terrible names that do not fit the situation at all. and from there, we move onward (press w :3)

i can't predict how you're going to react to these events happening, but if a look at myself, i know that i'll probably watch caiti's stream as a vod, so i can give myself time to pause and take breaks. i want to try to watch the stream before seeing others input, so i can form my own opinions without going in feeling overly negative/positive.

worse case scenario- she says something that completely puts me off the space as a whole. i don't know what that would be, maybe just some observations she's made as a female creator in the space that puts a bad taste in my mouth, and i no longer feel comfortable being here at all. in that case, i disengage completely, or let myself sit and think on it for a bit before coming to a final decision

best case scenario (realistically)- caiti does her stream, and she talks about many of the things we already know about as problems with the space, and we take that as closure from the whole thing, and send our love and support.

when george's response comes, rinse and repeat. take the time to read/watch through it without the influence of others, and come to you own conclusion before looking what anyone else has to say. do not look at twitter. if you feel that his response is satisfying to you- however that may be- than assess how active you wish to be in the community going forward, what you want to spend your time doing online. and then we heal together, as a community.

and eventually, things will get better. dream and george might take hiatuses, but i find it very, very unlikely they'll quit entirely. eventually, we'll get titan videos and the plethora of shorts and content that dream has planned, even if a wrench has been thrown into the plans

obviously, we can never predict unexpected elements, but i genuinely believe that if something big were going to drop, it would have already. don't let the behind the scenes bullshit get you down, because it always comes from ccs who either hold grudges or are trying to save their own skin/get views

hope this helps at least a little bit, but please, please reach out if you need anything. no matter the responses caiti and george give, i'll stick around to talk to u guys

[alittledizzy]

Dizzy, I feel like I need your levelheadedness a bit rn... so that tweet, huh? Idk, I'm trying to look at it as sth not in a vacuum, his main is the least serious of all of his accounts and often he says things just to be a meme (plus that "lying" likes he just did), but it all feels weird. I feel like I've been witnessing a gradual progression of what they're willing to show us of their relationship the last few months and someone pulled a rug from under me and I'm all disoriented. Could be a play on words as well (we know Dream doesn't identify as gay) but I feel like I'm grasping at straws... do you have any thoughts?

I think feeling disoriented over it is a natural response - but here are my thoughts. They might be a little scattered too but my brain is just in that phase of taking in information and processing.

First thought: The progression of what just happened: he snapped pictures of him literally in the closet, then made that tweet, then liked a few responses saying he was lying. Which ties into...

Second thought: The tweet is also on his main account. Like you said, it's the least serious account, if you scroll through the only serious thing he's tweeted in half a year is 'merry christmas' - everything on there is a troll. Considering what the quote retweets look like, I think he's just written the account off and puts things there he doesn't feel like are a serious announcement or that he doesn't really want factored into the smaller audience of his genuine fanbase. Not that his fanbase doesn't see them but it's like - if he's talking to his people he has other accounts for that. That doesn't mean he didn't put it out there because some part of him felt like it would make him/George feel better to say, just that he also didn't want to say it in a way that didn't leave room for doubt. It's serious enough to be serious unless you know him and the context in which it's an automatic side-eye. Which leads to... Third thought: If the tweet had any serious elements to it, I think it's entirely likely it would be a kneejerk reaction to people telling the Spanish speaking streaming community that dnf is real and perhaps that being too much too fast for them - particularly George, who doesn't want anyone to know anything about him. Having come through the fires of Dan and Phil fandom, even if they were soft launching because they were happy in a new relationship and wanted to share, sometimes the journey of sexuality and relationships are one step forward, two steps back.

Especially if you're George and guard your personal information fiercely, especially if you're Dream that is terrified of putting himself out there with a label that might be 'wrong' and therefore doesn't want to definitively say he's anything.

Dream's comfort level is in eliminating what he's not (I'm not gay, I'm not straight) not in specifying what he is.

George's comfort level is posting a snapchat where he shows you has a smoothie and that's really the most you need to know about him as far as he's concerned.

So suddenly having people you want to be friends with addressing you and your relationship with complete sincerity when you haven't even had a chance to get comfortable with a soft launch amongst what you consider 'your' demographic might definitely cause a scurry of steps backwards. I'm a truther because it's fun and fandom is about having fun and enjoying the complexities of people and their dynamics. So I think about Dan and Phil, I think about people that go to great lengths to tie their lives and futures together. Buying a house, moving across the world, making sure everyone knows loud and clear this is your person - that can co-exist with fear and hesitation and not knowing how the world will accept you and not being sure if you want to leave the safety net you've made for yourself. So I guess a big part of me looks at this situation and thinks... seeing them work their way back up to comfort is gonna be so fun.