#this song was sadder than i thought what

[l0uterstella]

HIBIKI (Aoppella Stage theme) ENG TL

From this point on… Connecting with one another, intertwining with one another Spinning together, resounding with each other

This voice is yet to be "someone", looking for a place to rest I dream of us resounding beyond where we haven't reached yet

Learning to live everyday with speed, you always leave someone behind Swept away by the changing seasons, looking for the shortest route

Pretending to be tired, I still try to smile at something Feeling like a loser, let's find another start

I know the truth, that I'm right here I want you to know, but it makes me miserable The sun will rise again when we wake up, that alone makes me a little happy Reading comics to fool every week's Monday blues

If you can't reach out and do it As translucent as it is, just raise your voice

This voice is yet to be "someone", looking for a place to rest I dream of us resounding beyond where we haven't reached yet

From there on… Connecting with one another, intertwining with one another Spinning together, resounding with each other

Someday, someone will (Someday, somewhere) Become inevitable That will become my new voice

To that youthful time To that youthful moment This voice, this heart, it resonates with its youth

This voice is yet to be "someone"

[chithereader]

you and me / aaron hotchner

word count: 1.9k

pairing: aaron hotchner x singer!reader , aaron hotchner x f!reader

genre: fluff, a little angst

cw: a lot of conversation, i went a little crazy i just love interviews like zane lowe’s!!! and soft aaron

a/n: this photo just makes me think of aaron waiting backstage for popstar!reader / singer!reader

and requests are open!! would love to know what you guys want to read ◡̈

You requested that the set-up of the interview be comfortable. You knew you’d be talking about your albums which are notoriously packed with stories and emotions, personal and imagined. Now what is more comfortable than your own home? 

When you were designing your home, you knew from the start you wanted a conversation pit. You’ve always dreamed of a house that screamed cozy and comfortable, warm and inviting. Even if it cost millions to make, you had no regrets. 

But aside from the occasional family dinners, your sunken living room was only ever used when Aaron and Jack sleep over, and you had a movie marathon night. You'd throw in duvets and pillows on the pit and bunch together whether it was cold or not.

So you thought this interview is perfect to justify your design choice. To use the conversation pit for actual conversation. Which brings you to now, sat across your good friend and favorite interviewer Zane Lowe, your previous and latest album being the topic of conversation. 

���Your previous album was– you know, I mean, it was–” Zane appears to struggle for a word to encapsulate one of the lowest points in your life. Fractured was definitely an emotional album to make and an even sadder one to listen to.  

“Depressing?” you jokingly say. Talking has always been so easy with Zane. He just has this air to him that lets you know he truly just wants to know you. You sit on the couch sideways, facing Zane. Leaning on the back rest with your elbow, head resting on your hand while your other hand fidgets with the tassels on the pillow. 

He laughs, “Well, you were definitely at a low point in your life romantically.” fiddling with his chin, thinking of his next words, “You just– I think you perfectly captured in your songs that sort of loss and tangible grief that comes with letting go of a person- not because there weren’t any love anymore but more because love just wasn’t enough to keep it going.” 

Remembering what had happened– the air felt thinner. Like it was getting harder to breathe. You had to remember that that point of your life was over. You felt such real pain that time, so much so that you struggled to function in your daily life. That void. That ringing emptiness. 

You’re brought back to reality by Zane’s voice, “Could you touch on how that came about?” 

You breathe out a small sigh and with a gentle smile you recall, “Yeah, uhm.. I was in this relationship.. which in hindsight, I’m so lucky to have been in. It taught me so much and truly made me so much more mindful I guess. I mean like, smarter? More conscious definitely of what goes into making a relationship work, and what makes it strong.” 

“But like you said, it ended because as much as we both wanted it to work, as much as we loved each other, it just wasn’t happening. And it was a vicious cycle that was tiring us out. We just knew it wasn’t supposed to be like that.” You pause for a bit, reflecting. 

Flashes of you and Aaron driving home in silence after a dinner at Rossi’s play in your head. You didn’t talk the whole night. Not when you were dressing up. Not in the car ride on the way there. Not when you sat down together. And definitely not when each of you were across the room, busy in separate conversations ignoring the glaringly obvious. 

Looking down at the decorative pillow in your lap, you start, “And I think that in my experience, that’s a lot more painful. I think that break-ups that happen when one hurts the other is somehow better because you get to hold on to I deserve better or like– there’s just thing like anger that drives you to move on.”

You’re taken back to that night. Coming home and feeling the weight of it fall on both your shoulders. You sat for hours in silence, holding each other. Knowing that when the sun rises, he’ll go to work, you’ll go on tour, and your little world will be put to rest. 

“But having that overflowing love for a person who is just not meant for you– I mean how do you tell yourself to let go? How can you even try to convince yourself ? Because people say so often that as long as you love someone there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for them and that’s true. I’ve been there, and even everything wasn’t enough. And that was something we really struggled with.” 

“Just admitting that we had to love each other from afar before we turned into strangers together.” 

It just didn’t make sense. The love you had for each other was real. It was deep and true, and neither of you had any doubt of what you meant to each other. There was no question of loyalty or trust. 

But the traveling, the conflict in schedules, the missed calls and messages left on read. You just became both so busy, you were worlds apart. It even reached the point that you haven’t talked for days and neither of you noticed. Or minded. You thought of each other, yeah. But there wasn’t that urge to reach out anymore. There was just… longing. 

–

“Which brings us to now. Your latest album Leftover Love– it’s a lot more hopeful isn’t it? I mean I’d even go as far as saying that it’s about falling in love all over again.” Zane sips on the tea you made him. Leaning over the makeshift coffee table to add more milk in there. 

You straighten a little. Mood instantly lifting at the mention of your favorite album to date. Images of the inspiration behind the album filling your head. 

Zane puts down his tea to gesture generously, “And hearing it live, you could just feel it in the crowd– this kind of electricity. And because there’s no other way to put it– your songs in this album feel a lot like jumping and dancing with a partner in a room full of people and everything is just in slow motion. It’s like this sort of alignment or clicking into place, finding that one person that makes those small moments feel so.. big.” 

He put it perfectly into words. You had really hoped to relay through your songs the recent turn of events in your life. People who have supported you and loved you when you were at low points in your life got you through that, and you felt so strongly that they deserved to know and feel even a fraction of the happiness that you’re feeling right now through your new songs. 

“Definitely, I mean I’m so proud to say that these songs, even if they’re a touch fictional or exaggerated or romanticized– they are based on truths, on real things that have happened or are happening in my life.” You’re getting excited. Pulling the sleeves of your sweater to cover your hands until only your fingertips are visible– you place both hands down on the pillow as if bracing yourself for the climax of a rollercoaster ride. 

“The song Blindly for example, it’s about that feeling or like moment of realization that you’re just so crazy in love you’d follow this person anywhere blindly. I love that the sound’s so grunge-y and messy– insane. Because that’s literally how it feels to be in that whirlwind.” 

Zane picks up on your excitement, nodding at your explanation. He relaxes more into his seat and gestures to you, “It’s a good thing you mentioned that because I actually wanted to ask you why that song slows down at the end. I think that was such a unique and beautiful thing to do to the song and it works so well. But I just want to know what made you do that–” You’re biting your lip smiling, so proud that it was recognized as a conscious choice as a musician and artist.

Zane continues, “It goes from crazy drums and guitar, and the bass– then slows down into this almost hypnotic music box sound that transitions by the end into just this beat like a pulse.” 

Your smile grows bigger which Zane mirrors, “I’m so happy you picked up on that. I have to say that’s actually one of the songs I’m most proud of because it’s one of the first songs that I was heavily involved in the engineering of the sound.”

“But yeah I guess ultimately I just wanted it to mimic that transition from being in crazy love, tornado-esque to it literally settling into this beautifully calm and serene kind of love.” 

Zane listens intently, nodding and humming in agreement and knowing. Finally understanding the point of view from which the sound was created. He has this gentle smile on his face, almost of encouragement knowing you had more to say, 

“Like you go from all these dates and the honeymoon phase, and your heart’s just beating crazy fast all the time and then it turns into that steady murmur of your fridge in the null of the night when you’re baking muffins together in silence.”

You take a deep breath, chewing on the inside of your lip. Hopelessly trying to minimize the smile fighting its way on your face, “It’s just that process of someone becoming your home.” 

-

You're ushering out the last of the production people. Walking alongside Zane who’s the last to step out your front door, you give him a big hug which he returns warmly. 

“I’m so happy you’re happy,” he murmurs into your ear. 

You bury your face into his shoulder and breathe out a laugh, “Thank you.. Really.” 

You separate and smile at each other. Waving goodbye as he walks backwards to his car. You stand by your front door until they pull out of your driveway.

Once you see that your driveway is empty, you turn to your door and see him leaning against the doorframe with a smug, knowing smirk. 

Rolling your eyes playfully as you pass by him into your home, he chuckles. You hear his footsteps behind you and you know he’s following you around while you tidy up the dishes you and Zane used, “Aaron, take out the trash please.” 

This man just listened to you talk about him for hours. With headphones and a monitor set up in the other room– Aaron just got his ego inflated to a size so immeasurable he can’t hide his smile from the strangers beside him controlling lights and volumes. He has got to be humbled.

“Oh so I’m back to Aaron now?” He catches up to you, halting your movements from behind as he takes hold of your arms so you can put down whatever was in them. Then he turns you around by your shoulders so you’re facing him, grinning that smile that makes you go Fuck and then blank in your head.

“And here I was thinking I was home.” Aaron pulls you close, sliding an arm around your waist only to settle on your back as the other holds your hand against his chest, in between you. He starts swaying you both slowly as he buries his nose into the side of your head, humming a familiar tune. 

Kiss me once, then kiss me twice

Then kiss me once again

It's been a long, long time

Haven't felt like this, my dear

Since I can't remember when

It's been a long, long time

You'll never know how many dreams

I've dreamed about you

While he was listening to you go on about how you loved him all throughout your rocky start and even more well into the present– he became overwhelmed with the realization that for once in his life, there was absolutely no doubt in his mind that he is loved. Truly, deeply, and steadily loved. And that filled him with something that nothing and no one could ever define or measure. 

[amoressb]

𐙚 old love

pairings : ex bf!riki x reader ; exs to lovers

synopsis : it has been almost a year since y/n and riki have broken up, though the reason behind it is quite silly. simply stating that you both were on different paths. while on your “different” paths, you both reminisce the times you have spent together, the special moments now turned into memories, but what if your paths werent so different at all? especially since both paths lead you to the same tree where you two shared your first kiss together under the enchanting moonlight.

*w.c - 1.6k

*inspired by my favorite song old love by yuji & putri dahlia !!

* this is a long one so i hope you all enjoy till the very end !!

waking up you already knew it would be a particularly sadder day than the rest, as with each day it draws closer to the day you and your ex boyfriend, nishimura riki, broke up. which would now complete a year. a year without, who you consider, your special someone. a year without your best friend. just a year without him.

this is what you both were afraid of when you both started dating. you both were afraid of that one dreaded day where you two would split, but you guys never thought it would happen. that night you both lost the most important thing in your lives.

in the beginning of the break up it was of course very hard to deal with. yes it was a mutual agreement but you both couldn’t help but feel that it was a mistake. both were too afraid to speak up about how they truly feel after they had already agreed to split and that right there was their true problem. communication. you both became very closed off when it came to communicating youre feelings. you both would simply ask each other what was wrong and if neither said anything, it simply gets brushed off.

throughout the rest of the day it was quite noticeable that your mood was down. your friends came up to you, called and even messaged you asking if you were doing okay, but of course you simply said you were fine. it had been like this ever since the beginning of this month. wake up sadder than yesterday and have people ask you if you were feeling okay and you saying you were fine.

you missed riki very badly as did he. it’s unbelievable how you two have gone this far without getting back in contact. the only thing you can think of is going on a late night walk so you grabbed your jacket and headed out.

since it was quite late, the streets were quiet with the occasional cars passing by and the whistle of the wind. while on the walk you started to remember some memories you had with riki, but there was one memory that you will forever cherish. the day you and riki shared your first kiss.

ʚɞ

you and riki have been dating for 3 months and you guys couldnt be happier. since today marks the third month, riki wanted to take you on a sweet date. he surprised you by taking you to a place where you can paint your own pottery. oh how cute this date was. you both decided to make a matching set together.

“so what should we paint my love?” said riki while looking at you with excitement. “ooo do you wanna make a matching set? i think that would be cute!” you said grabbing onto his hand almost jumping in your seat from excitement. “yeah sure but what?” he scooted his chair closer to yours still holding your hand since he felt so far from you even though he was just inches away. “i found this cute design but lets add something to the bottom so its more personalized!” you show him the image of what you wanted to do.

rikis heart melted looking at the image. “lets add i love you at the bottom but yours will say riki mines will say y/n” he gives his idea hoping youd take it. “aww that so cute yes lets do it!” you give him a quick kiss on the cheek and started to get you guys stuff ready. rikis was still stuck on the kiss he received on the cheek. even though youve done it a million times, your lips on him would always spread such warmth through him. he couldnt get enough of you truly.

riki had already finished his cup but you were still at it. this gave riki time to really take in your presence and beauty. he adored the face you make when youre concentrated, getting all serious making sure your details came out perfectly. the way some strands of you hair tends to slowly fall in front of you which allows him to draw himself closer to you and brush it away to see more of your beauty. what he loved most was your eyes. the way your eyes always had this beautiful shine to them no matter what. he fell in love with how your eyes shine brighter than before whenever you look at him because thats the exact way he looks at you, with such love and adoration.

you both completed your art and left with your new mugs. the rest of the day was spent going into some stores buying some cute matching things then ultimately a little cafe. after the cafe it was already dark so to end off the night, you and riki decided to go on a simple walk in the park talking about how your day went.

"i really enjoyed our date kiki, i cant wait to use my mug and all these cute new matching stuff we have now!" you say with a little giggle. oh how he loved your little giggle and your laugh all around. simply just you in general is what he loved so much. "me too and i cant wait to go on many more with you my love" he smiles softly at you.

coming up under a tree, you stare at the moon in awe, “its so beautiful kiki” you continue to look up unaware of rikis gaze on you. “yeah it really is beautiful” he says while you turn to catch his enchanted gaze at you. “y/n..i love you more than anything in this world. youre so beautiful and you always know how to light up someones day even with just that pretty smile of yours and you truly mean the world to me.” as riki says this you cant help but only be able to utter the words “i love you-” before you can finish, you feel his soft lips on yours. it felt like fireworks went off as soon as it happened. you never wanted this moment to end and neither did he. as you two pulled apart you two simply giggle sweetly and rest your foreheads against each others staring at each other with nothing but love.

ʚɞ

its almost like you and riki were still connected somehow because he too was also doing the exact same thing as you. he too was feeling the same as you, sadder than before thinking about how hes been away from you for almost a year. he too decided to take a late night walk and started to reminisce all the times hes been with you, the memories he holds so dear to his heart. especially that one.

i also say you two are still connected because those oh so “different paths” unconsciously lead you both to the exact same place you shared that special moment. you both look up at each other, stunned youre both here right now. slowly you two inched your way closer to each other, now standing right in the same special spot.

you both say hi at the same time which makes you two let out a small chuckle. “so..how have you been?” you asked and right there riki broke. he had to tell you how he was truly feeling, the feeling of utter loneliness. the feeling of that there was something missing from his life and it was you. you were everything he needed and he wanted no he needed you back. “can i be honest with you?” he asked sincerely. “yeah you know you can always be honest with me kiki.” oh that sweet nickname you gave him always made him feel so warm inside. it made him feel so special since it was only you who called him that and he loved it so much.

“well then in all honesty i havent been feeling good recently as it draws closer to one year of us being apart. i dont know how or why i havent reached out to you, i miss you so much. i feel as a whole part of me is missing. youre my missing piece y/n. on the walk here you were all i thought of, all those beautiful memories we have had. heck i still use our matching mug that we made and have all our matching things with me always” he states as he brings up his shirt a bit to reveal his keys attached to his pants with the matching keychains you bought as well as the matching ring you two had bought on his finger. seeing that you brought out your keychain and showed your ring too. you two never did let go of each other.

at the sight of this, you and riki both started to tear up. “please baby, i dont want to be away from you anymore” riki stated as a tear started to fall. you got closer and reached your hand up to his cheek to wipe away his tear smiling softly. “me neither kiki” and with that you slowly leaned in to give him a soft yet passionate kiss to his lips and with a quick yet gentle motion he wraps his hands around your waist to pull you in closer to him. oh how he missed you being this close. eventually you pull away much to you and rikis dismay, “will you be mine again? forever this time?” riki asks with a smile, bringing up one hand to softly stroke your cheek. “yes of course. i love you so much kiki” she smiles. “i love you so much more” he says leaning in for another sweet kiss.

even on “different paths” you and riki found a way back into each others arms and what better place to find each other again than where it all truly began.

* if you made it to the end thank you and i hope you liked it ilya !!

[ashotofogdensoldfirewhiskey]

Can you write something hinny that includes the phrase “you are everything to me” or something in that vein of romantic confessionals?

This turned out a big angstier/sadder than you might've hoped, but here it is anyway <3

It wasn’t a very happy birthday, all things considered. 

There had been cake - chocolate. Presents - more than usual. Singing - respectably on-key. Guests - so many that they’d spilled out into the yard. All the typical ingredients for an excellent party. 

But.

Mum had been crying when she’d frosted the cake. 

Ginny had received a new broomstick (Harry), a lovely necklace (her parents), expensive French perfume (Bill and Fleur); a particularly good haul, even for seventeen. And yet, she’d swallowed the lump in her throat when, rather than a customary box of Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes products, she’d opened new Quidditch boots. Happy seventeenth, from George, the card had said. Just George.

Their plucky rendition of Happy Birthday sounded hollow without Fred shrieking an off-key upper harmony. Mum had always said he ruined it, all those years of birthdays with seven kids. Now, without it, the song seemed broken beyond repair. But, asking them not to sing it at all had seemed worse, somehow. 

Mum and Dad and Bill and Fleur and Charlie and Percy and Audrey and George and Ron and Hermione and Harry and Kingsley and Hagrid and Luna and Neville and Hannah and Andromeda and Teddy and…

No Fred. No Lupin. No Tonks. No Collin. Their absence was glaring. A dementor that sucked all the happiness from the room. 

She’d put on a brave face through it all. Eaten the cake even though it tasted like tears, thanked them all for the gifts that had broken her heart, cheekily conducted a song that she’d rather never hear again, tried to breathe around the gaping chasm her brother had left behind. 

Not a very happy birthday, at all. But they’re trying to make it one, and perhaps eventually the trying will work. 

One has to hope. 

For now, the firewhiskey will have to supplement. 

Ginny is pleasantly buzzed by the time the non-family guests have gone. Mum is busying herself in the kitchen, trying unsuccessfully to hide a new bout of tears. Her father and brothers - sans George - are all lazing around the den, half heartedly listening to the wireless - Wasps vs. Tornados. George had gone up to bed an hour ago, but Ginny couldn’t blame him. Hermione, Percy, and Fleur are talking about the Beauxbatons exam curriculum, something Ginny wants exactly zero part in.

One person, she notices, is conspicuously absent. 

She finds him out on the swing in the garden, looking out over the orchard, a glass of what appears to be firewhiskey in his hand. 

She allows herself a moment just to look at him - disheveled hair and handsome face and sharp jaw. She knows, logically, that Harry is safe now, and yet she can’t quite quell the old instinct to drink him in. One last look at him, like she might never get another, like she’ll have to cling onto this one, ration it out to recall when she needs to. 

It’s stupid, anyway. The memory of him had never been even close to the real thing, but in that long year apart she’d never stopped trying to remember the exact shape of his eyes, the way he had a dimple in his left cheek when he smirked at her, the way his hands were solid and sure and so good at making her feel things she’d never–

“Gin?”

He notices her standing there, and offers her a half-smile through the darkness. She can just make out the glint of his eyes behind his specs. 

“Thought you’d left,” she says, aiming for teasing but ending up somewhere just shy of it. “Alright if I join you out here?”

“Of course,” he says, as though offended she’d even asked. “Plenty of room.”

There is, but she snuggles up next to him anyway, her added weight causing them to sway gently on the swing. He drops an arm over her shoulder, and a kiss to her temple, and pulls her up against him. The vague thrum of anxiety that had plagued her all day seems to quiet under the warm weight of his touch. 

“Happy birthday,” Harry says. He’d said it earlier, with everyone, but she likes hearing it again, just for her. 

Ginny hums. “Yeah, I suppose. Mum’s crying again, and George went up to bed ages ago. Dead grim in there. Dunno why Mum insisted we do this whole party when it’s made her so bloody miserable, I’d have been alright with a normal dinner.”

“It’s your seventeenth, though,” Harry points out. “Suppose she wanted it to be special. It should be special.”

“Well, we put on a good show of it, anyway,” Ginny says, reaching over and snatching the glass of firewhisky from Harry’s grip and stealing a gulp. She relishes the burn of it. 

Harry lets out a small breath of a laugh, pinches at her side for her thievery, but he lets her do it anyway. He tugs the glass back out of her grip once she’s finished and takes another gulp himself. 

“It’s what we’ve got to do though, isn’t it?” Harry says suddenly. “Pretend it’s alright until it is.”

“Doesn’t seem like it’ll ever be alright, really,” Ginny says cynically, snuggling deeper into Harry’s embrace. “Or at least, it’ll never be the way it was.”

“No,” Harry agrees, and he sounds more serious than she wants him to. 

God, what is wrong with her? She used to be better at this: lightening the mood with a joke or some good banter, fighting off the gloom. She doesn’t want to sit out here on her seventeenth birthday with her boyfriend and talk about death.

After a minute, she can sense Harry is searching for words. She leans back so that she can look up at his face, and finds he’s staring straight ahead, chewing on something. He seems to be on the precipice of speech, but then he takes another gulp of his drink. 

“What is it?” Ginny breathes. 

“Nothing,” Harry says quickly. “It’s stupid.”

“No, it’s not,” Ginny says firmly. She can’t imagine ever finding anything he has to tell her stupid. 

He looks down to meet her eye, and god. He makes her feel too much, like her heart is overbrimming and spilling out over her bones. 

“I just…” he struggles. He seems to find his words. “I was just thinking that I’m really glad I chose to live so that I could be here at your shite birthday party.”

“Oh, thanks,” Ginny snorts before the entirety of his words strike her. “I really appreciate–” She cuts herself off and sits up straight. “Hang on. What do you mean, ‘chose to live’?”

Harry averts his eye and takes another sip of firewhiskey. 

The question hangs in the evening air, and as the silence swells, Ginny realizes she isn’t sure that she wants to hear the answer. 

They’d spent weeks, filling each other in about the last year in dribs and drabs. She doesn’t yet have the full picture of all he’d been through, of all that had happened, but she doesn’t begrudge him. There are sore spots in her own past she’d rather not press – not yet, not just now – things she hasn’t been able to find the words to say to him yet. 

She reckons the same is true for him, too. She’d never wanted to press him, but it had not escaped her notice there is a gaping hole in her understanding of what had transpired in May: Harry, dead in Hagrid’s arms. 

He’d gone into the forest to die, and he’d come out alive. That’s all she knows, and frankly it’s all she’d mustered up the courage to ask. There seem to be too many painful doors to open down that particular avenue, things like why didn’t you say goodbye and did you know you’d come back and were you scared and I thought you were dead and I felt like I was too. 

They hadn’t touched it, and yet Harry seemed to be offering it to her, now. 

“What do you mean?” she says more softly, more bravely. “You chose to live?”

And so he tells her. Slowly, and stilted, but his hand is warm in hers. Snape’s memories. Learning that he had to die. The long walk into the forest. Finding Voldemort. 

“...I closed my eyes and I thought of you,” Harry says, like it’s just some part of the story, like he’s not breaking her heart and stitching it back together in one with these words. “So that you’d be the last thing I saw, and then he did it. Avada Kedavra. And I was gone.”

He presses a hand to his chest, and Ginny can picture the green light striking him there. She can’t fathom any of it, how difficult it must’ve been for him to walk to his own execution, how scared he must have been, how he could possibly still be sitting, living and breathing, beside her now. She grips his hand so tightly that it’s a wonder he has any feeling in it at all. 

Harry shifts uncomfortably, and his words are awkward now. “I still don’t know if any of it was real, or if it was just something I imagined while I was… wherever I was. But I… I spoke with Dumbledore. Or… I imagined I did, I dunno. About a lot of things, but mainly that I could choose to go, you know, on. Or I could go back and live again, if I wanted.”

He explains of the protection his mother’s love had left him with, that had tethered him to life despite the Killing Curse to his chest. 

Harry’s grip on her hand tightens, and he turns to meet her eyes fully for the first time since he began speaking. He wipes his other hand wearily over his face, and sighs. “I’m sorry, I’m a bit drunk. This is… it’s your birthday. I didn’t mean to–”

“Harry,” Ginny interrupts gently. “Go on.”

Harry inhales, bracing himself against the memory. “I knew if I chose to come back, I’d be coming back to the war, and Voldemort, and everyone I loved dying. And for a minute the thought of just… leaving it all behind, being at peace with my parents, and Sirius, and Lupin…”

Ginny can imagine how strong of a pull that must’ve been. She grips him harder, as though he’s facing the choice again at this moment and she might be able to tether him to her with her fingers.

“But then I thought of you, and the life I wanted – I want, with you. And I knew I had to come back, even if it meant dealing with all of the shite that came with it.”

Just like with the rest of it, he doesn’t seem to realize that he’s said anything of any particular import, but the words burrow under her skin and make a home there, painful and vulnerable and hopeful. 

“I’m sorry,” Harry says anxiously, interrupting himself as he looks at her expression. “Shit, Ginny, I didn’t–”

Ginny realizes she has tears streaming down her cheeks. She wipes them away impatiently. 

“--shit timing, it’s all a bit heavy for your birthday, isn’t it?” Harry babbles. “I just said it because I know today was dead grim, and you’re right, things will probably never be the same. But I just kept thinking that I’m so glad we’ll get to do it all again next year and for the first time that doesn’t seem like–”

She cuts off his anxious babbling with a kiss, hard and searing, and she holds his chin in her hands, precious, appreciating how very close she came to rationing memories of him for the rest of her life. 

She pulls away, her head still spinning with all that she’d told her. She needed to think about it, ask more questions about Snape and Voldemort and Horcruxes and blood magic. But most pressingly: “Let me see if I’ve got this right. You’re telling me that I’m the last thing you thought of when you went to die, and the reason you decided to live?”

Harry stares at her. “Well, when you put it like that– I suppose, yeah. Yes.”

Ginny shakes her head slowly, helplessly. “Harry.”

“I love you,” Harry says, like this is all the explanation that’s needed, because perhaps it is. He’s said this to her every day for weeks, but this is the first time she truly appreciates that love is a verb; that he’s not describing a state of being but rather something he’s actively doing: loving her. 

“I’m not always the best with words–” Harry continues, and Ginny nearly chokes. “--but you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and it’s not even a competition, really. You’re everything. I didn’t mean to put pressure on you, or anything, I realize now how that all sounded and–”

“I love you, too,” Ginny says fiercely, ignoring any out he’s offering her, like she’d want one. “And I want to talk about the rest of it, all of it. I can’t believe you had to– I don’t even want to think about–” Ginny shakes her head. “You haven’t put any pressure on me, other than I don’t know how I’m meant to respond to that in a way that measures up–”

“No, you don’t–”

“But I love you,” Ginny presses on. “So much. And that’s what I want with you too, all of it, everything. I always have. I’m… so glad you came back because I don’t know what I’d have done if–”

“Gin–”

Ginny kisses him again, desperate. Harry says he’s the one who’s no good with words but Ginny has never been less articulate in her life. Instead she tries to pour the contents of her heart into the fingers she runs through his hair, the grip of her hands over his chest where his heart beats reassuringly beneath his warm skin, the press of her lips against his. 

She pulls back, eyes wet, breathing heavily. Harry’s looking at her with that soft wonder that he sometimes gets, an expression she might understand a bit better now. “That was the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard, but if you ever try to go off alone and die again, I will kill you myself. Don’t you ever do that again, alright?”

Harry grins. “Alright. I think I can manage that.”

“Good.”

A grin spreads across Ginny’s face, and now they’re just two grinning idiots on a swing who want to spend forever together, and for the first time there isn’t any glaring obstacle in the way of it. She allows herself to picture it - a nice cozy home to share, a wedding, kids with messy hair and green eyes, a life that might grow around the grief in her chest. 

She settles back into his arms, snug against him, miraculously alive and hers. She loves him so much it has nowhere to go. 

“I am sorry your birthday was shite, though,” Harry says. 

“It wasn’t,” Ginny says, and she means it.

[ataraxiaspainting]

There is an Uproar.

Yan Gojo x F Reader.

Synopsis: Satoru thinks you simply haven’t come around yet.

Warnings: Yandere themes, stalking, threats of kidnapping, delusional Gojo, and manipulation.

Word Count: 3.2k.

Ten Songs Like This Piece:

Six Forty Seven by Instupendo

Money, Money, Money by ABBA

Choke - Acoustic by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

Me and the Devil by Soap&Skin

Breezeblocks by alt-J

Feeling Good by Micheal Bublé

Claus by Los Tres

Bleed Magic by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

This Could Be Us by Rae Sremmurd 

Do I Wanna Know? by Arctic Monkeys

“You're like a half-tamed creature, still shy of the bridle. 'Except you enthrall me, never shall be free.' But freedom is an illusion, anyway.” – Nenia Campbell, Fearscape

*~*~*~*

Satoru came to your door with gifts again; mochi, bubble tea, bouquets of roses, keychains, jewelry, books… everything you could ever ask for he either had in his hands or would quickly get for you by whatever means necessary.

It’s a shame really that you refuse to show your true feelings for him, especially after all he has done to make you happy. But he can be patient when he wants to be, and so with a not-yet-broken heart, at least fifteen gift bags wrapped around both his clenched hands, and a chuckle he rings your doorbell twice. He could hear some shuffling from inside and a shout of coming.

The voice was high-pitched and cheery from the sound of it. His eyes lit up then as he smiled widely. But as soon as the door opened, his smile slightly faltered as his gaze met eyes he had never seen before.

The woman in front of him was not you. What was she doing in your apartment?

His first thought was to assume she was an intruder, someone who broke into your home, stole your belongings and money, hid you in a closet or under cement, and is pretending to be you for the time being. Well, he can’t be fooled so easily if that was the case. But he then chose to let the woman speak before coming to conclusions. Though she was wearing your cute Hello Kitty hoodie and utterly adorable My Melody headband and had one of your pore strips on her nose. She obviously knew you in some way, and so he in turn needed to know her.

The woman waved at him and slowly looked down from his face to the many presents in his hands. Her head turned then, a huh accidentally coming from her lips.

“Hello miss,” Satoru tries his best to be polite and not have any bias towards her, but it is indeed hard to do so. It is hard to not have any bias and not entertain the idea of snapping her neck, because he does not know her and she is not you. He does not recognize her from any of your friend groups, and it took everything in him to not sneer and glare at her and demand to know where you were.

“Hey,” She seems to try her best to be polite too, trying to hide her confusion behind a small smile. “Can I help you?”

Satoru nods, trying to put on an eager and friendly front. He then gestures towards the gifts in his hands and chuckles. He fakes almost dropping one for dramatic effect. It seemed like it worked because the woman gasped and then sighed in relief as Satoru caught it in time before it could fall on the floor.

“I am looking for [First], I thought she would be here.” The stranger nods, her smile becoming more prominent. As a result, his own became more prominent too, though his was fake. “I’m her boyfriend. Wanted to surprise her, you know?” 

He is technically not lying. He’s right if anything. Once you stop playing hard to get and fall into his arms, he’ll officially be known as such. He’s right, if only you stopped pretending to be so disinterested.

“Ah, I see!” The woman answers, her eyes inviting and curious. He sighs, faking a small sob and groan. She looked concerned then.

“If only she was here, I always love seeing her smile!” He closes his eyes, trying his best to look sadder than a kicked puppy. “I suppose she’s not here right now…”

With how the girl steps to the side, her hand gesturing towards the apartment hallway, Satoru knows that his plan worked.

*~*~*~*

“I’m Eve, her roommate, nice to meet you!”

“The same to you.”

“So how long have you two been together?”

“A long time, we’ve been together since our high school days!”

“She sure is lucky to have such a devoted boyfriend, huh?”

He laughs at the compliment, his back crouched a bit downward at an angle so he could be more comfortable walking about. Eve chuckles at his casualness.

“You sure got her a lot,” Her tone is sweet, another piece of proof to reassure Satoru that she trusts him fully. Until you eventually show up from wherever you have gone and start spewing lies, she will continue to be that way. You seem to not have good taste in roommates, it seems because Eve is far too naive for your safety. “Like a lot. Do you come here often? I just moved in so…”

Satoru doesn’t pay attention to her questions as he fantasizes about the day when you move into his place and you sleep next to him and wake him up with good morning kisses. A beautiful ring will adorn your finger one day, and you will enthusiastically anticipate his arrival from work while adorning the makeup he favors and styling your hair to his liking.

It was a small, cramped apartment, one definitely not worth how much money you rent it for. “I never get tired of how cute [First] makes this place. With both her presence and how she decorates everything. She has good taste.” He goes into the kitchen area, still having his arms hooked by the strings of the many gift bags, and looks around at the scented candles, dried flowers, and baked cookies on the table. “[First] made these, right?”

“Yeah,” Eve really is stupid, isn’t she? If he were a burglar she would be dead on the spot. How could she possibly protect you from any danger? He would obviously be a better housemate than her. 

Satoru leans towards the kitchen table and snatches a cookie from the cooled baking sheet, biting into it and chewing loudly. 

“Delicious, right?” Eve asks, giggling. She does not seem scared at all and seems to have no boundaries whatsoever.

He agrees, quickly devouring the entire confection and licking his fingers clean. “She’s always been a good baker. There’s a good recipe she knows for pie too. Maybe I’ll ask her to make it for me sometime…” He hums as he sets all the gifts down on the back coffee table. “She sure is a catch, wouldn’t you say? Her baking is one of the reasons I was so attracted to her in the first place.”

Your roommate nods. Satoru considers taking his leave now, but he has never been in your apartment during the day before. 

He may as well stay a while. It will be fun, he tells himself.

So, he walks into the living room and starts reading the titles of books on the shelving next to your writing desk. A lot of horror and romance books from the looks of it. Classic little you.

He then looks over to your computer. 

“So sweet, like a cupcake,” He touches the top of the laptop, his fingertips tracing the many rainbow stickers that cover it. You really are just the best, aren’t you?

Before he could open it though, he could hear keys jingling. You’re here.

“I’m back–” As if you were a sort of lightbulb running out of power, your cheerfulness declines smoothly and steadily, being quickly replaced by a cute sneer.

Satoru lets out a loud laugh. He adjusts his stance, placing a hand on his waist.

“Ah, [First], honey! Welcome back, I brought you some gifts!”

Instead of responding, you turn to Eve, your scowl turning into a simple frown. Advancing swiftly, you approach her, closing the distance with eyebrows ascending in sudden understanding. Eve, on the other hand, responds by tilting her head to the side, resembling a perplexed canine, in clear bewilderment of your abrupt outburst.

Gently, you grasp her hands within your own.

“Eve, I forgot to tell you something important.” You point at Satoru with a shaky finger. He simply chuckles in response, amused with how quick you are to hide your excitement. “Whatever you do, don’t let him in.”

Eve lets out a sound of surprise. “Huh, what, why?”

Your gaze meets Satoru’s and you look like you could hardly breathe.

“He is a stalker; he is always lying to people and saying that we are dating and are head over heels in love, but don’t believe him one bit.”

His eyes dart across the room as he loses eye contact with you and Eve. All the while, as his head darts from side to side, he pouts, puffs up his cheeks childishly, and leans back slightly against the wall, not too oblivious but subtle to his amusement. His face is a mask of innocence and confusion, trying to appear like he is not aware of what is going on–when he is very much aware of it and is silently enjoying it.

He loudly sighs and rolls his eyes, his hands sliding to his face as he brings them up to cover his sunglasses and mouth. He is trying to hide a smile, the act of which is just too much for his face to handle. He keeps shaking his head in dramatic disbelief and he turns to the side to lean against the wall harder as he puts his head down, shaking his head in exaggerated betrayal. 

Satoru tries his best to not laugh again, it would ruin his marvelous performance.

He is the most captivating person in this room, you and Eve must be hung up on his every action and word, you two cannot look past his incredible acting.

Nobody is capable of acting to the degree that he is, his performances are legendary and his acting skills are unparalleled.

He is simply the best there is and ever will be. If there were a competition in this room to win an Oscar for best acting, he is certain that he would be taking that home. There is nothing on God’s green earth that can get in the way of him delivering these lines and excellent movements. He is so talented and so experienced, who could ever deny his skills?

“Gojo,” You say coldly. “Get out.”

He expects you to see the gifts, how heartbroken he is, and finally admit that you are just as much in love with him as he is with you. Instead, he could swear for a moment that he could hear crickets, before realizing that it is the wick of the candle on your kitchen table burning. As he surveys you and Eve he notices that he is getting no reaction.

“Babe.” When you don’t respond to the nickname, he snuffs a huff. “Stop pretending, okay?”

He thought that he was killing that acting.

He can’t believe that no one is buying his performance. He’s got the attitude, he’s got the swagger, he’s got it all, but neither of you are falling for it. This is just insulting. He knows he’s great, he knows he is delivering the performance of his life but for some reason, neither you nor Eve can see it! He is in absolute shock.

So, Satoru walks up to you and grabs your face.

He looks at Eve and she doesn’t look at him, she looks at you. That is fine, as long as he can still talk to her and you everything will be alright in the long run. Everything is going to be okay, he tells himself.

“Eve, can [First] and I have a few minutes alone?” Her eyes race to every corner of the room and slowly but surely make their way to the gold coins in his free hand. Multiple emotions spread across her face; confusion, greed… consideration. “It will only be for a sec, okay?” 

With a measured pace, Eve approaches his outstretched palm, her eyes fixated on the glistening gold. Her gaze mirrors that of a ravenous crow or a parched man deprived of water for days, or sustenance for weeks. Quivering hands accept the money, and in silence, she retreats to her room, closing the door behind her.

“Come on, drop the funny games,” Instead of directing your gaze towards him, your eyes fixate on the entrance of Eve's bedroom. The door is adorned with a vibrant pink poster of a popular musician, adorned with splashes of colorful paint. Inwardly, he reassures himself that this situation is acceptable. After all, the two of you are now in a private and secluded space. 

There is no longer anyone to hinder you from expressing your genuine emotions towards him. Surely you will finally admit them. Then you will eventually move to his place and stay there, happy and loving towards him at long last. All in due time, because Satoru can be patient when he wants to be.

“Get the fuck out. You sick–”

But now he does not want to be patient. He just wants to hear those words leave your pretty lips.

“Ah, ah, ah, watch your language, sweetie.” He interrupts you, placing a finger on your mouth. 

The mere expression on his countenance carries ample weight to silence your profanity-laden tirade.

He only perceives the captivating, extraordinary, flawless woman whom he is obligated to assist. You possess an excessive amount of independence - too unbound, unwilling to embrace his assistance, his presents, his finances - there exists a rationale why partners watch out for one another. Are you not aware of that? 

“That’s better.” He smiles and you start faking a shiver. “You really can listen when I finally put my foot down, huh? You can be stubborn with other people, you know, just not with me.”

He possesses strength - you lack it. You are so small compared to him. 

He possesses a keen understanding of the streets, while you lack that astuteness. The dress you have chosen to wear is excessively revealing. 

“Now, now, don’t cry. Shh, shh, shh. It was the only way I could see you, with how much you love to play hard to get.”

One can only imagine the number of individuals whom you captivated during the brief period you ventured outside today.

He possesses intelligence, while you lack it. You may believe otherwise, and you indeed excel in certain areas, such as your meticulousness in personal hygiene, which he acknowledges with humility, and your skill in baking, as well as your expertise in creating a cozy and plush bed. However, numerous matters elude your knowledge, such as selecting the right candidate in the upcoming election, performing a tire replacement, or operating a debit card. He is strong, while you are not. He is drawn to you for not being - captivated by your feminine allure; the way your body gently curves, your delicate touch, the fragrance that surrounds you, the melodic tone of your voice, and above all, your complete vulnerability when confronted with danger.

“Now, open your gifts. I did carry them all the way here after all.”

When you finally surrender, he will assume control over every decision you make. 

From selecting your attire to choosing items at the grocery store, he will dictate how you interact with other men and even how you smile. He believes you are incapable of handling even the simplest tasks. Additionally, he takes pleasure in instructing you on matters you are expected to be ignorant about. It's quite endearing, isn't it? 

He views you as his possession and will never, under any circumstances, let you slip away.

At his place, he has so many pretty outfits for you to choose from. A lot of aprons and cute dresses. All the while he downs a beer or seven with his friends and jokes about how nice you look cleaning. You'll listen to him rant about anything that comes into his mind, taking it all with a smile. It is not unusual for him to lay awake at night imagining what life would be like with you as his wife. First, he needs to show you your position as his wife and get rid of this misguided sense of independence you seem to be clinging to. What a dumb girl you are. It was meant to be, wasn't it? You are meant to be his girlfriend and eventually his wife, and you will by any means Satoru has to take.

He does not care what he has to do as long as the result is you finally giving in and loving your place in his arms. It is what you were made for. It is what he was made for.

So pretty. So stupid.

“Now, now. Stop crying, you’ll only ruin your makeup.”

*~*~*~*

On that particular evening, Satoru once again paid a visit to your apartment. However, instead of observing from a distance, he ventured further into the room and settled beside you as you lay in bed, rousing you from your slumber. The bed groaned as it shifted under his weight, and he swiftly covered your mouth to prevent any outcry.

Without hesitation, he gently hushed you, his other hand tracing the contours of your cheek and collarbone with his lengthy fingers. As he did so, he rhythmically caressed your neck, humming a tune that only he knew. In response, tears welled up in your eyes, but he promptly brushed them away. His initial hand soon abandoned its position on your mouth, ascending to tenderly stroke your hair.

"Don’t touch me," You rasped, observing how the moonlight cast an ethereal glow on his body and hair while obscuring his face in darkness.

He simply shushed you again and you could hear him breathing deeply through his nose and mouth.

He sat on his knees beside you. You could hear murmurs from him about how pretty you were, and you didn't know whether he was telling you or telling himself. Your hands clench the sheets in fistfuls. You let out a whimper. You close your eyes and grit your teeth, hoping this is just another bad dream.

He keeps murmuring fantasies. You don't open your eyes. You breathe through your mouth because you can smell his cologne with your nose. It is so strong, suffocating.

You eventually open them when the anxiety is too much, and you stare at him, wide-eyed, at the ceiling above his shoulders and head, at your cute vanity and glittering gold and silver jewelry and pastel clothes. Was that why he liked you so much because you were feminine and utterly defenseless in the face of a real threat? You think of an escape plan, of running to the bathroom grabbing your razor, and screaming at the top of your lungs.

“Such a beauty you are,” He whispered in your ear, his voice still so sticky. “So cute. A doll that only belongs to me. All that’s left is for you to finally accept because I know you want to, don’t you?”

You can’t stop him.

As the silence lingers, you find yourself yielding to the role of his girlfriend. Tear stains dot your pillow and mattress, remnants of your emotional turmoil. Satoru's praises now echo within you, as you surrender to his caresses. Your gaze shifts towards the window, where a few distant stars twinkle in the sky, veiled by a cloud that drapes the crescent moon like a bridal veil.

“So good. I just knew I wouldn’t have to take more… drastic measures.”

He snaps a picture on his phone for later.

[wingedshadowfan]

⚠️arcane s2 act iii spoilers // caitvi ending commentary ⚠️

the difference between the last individual scenes of vi and caitlyn, and the one they shared actually made me sob, so here's my analysis of what it all meant

caitlyn is at home, in her family mansion in piltover. her monologue seems to be a messege or an archive for the kirammans or historians after her; she's also looking at the kiramman house files, a family heirloom, a symbol of her legacy and her station, a connection to her mother. she's perhaps searching for something needed in order to start rebuilding the city, perhaps checking if jinx could still be somewhere out there, maybe even seeing what ekko saw about the undercity's vents and water ducts. she still seems to have purpose, or to be in search of one for herself.

vi is also in caitlyn's house in piltover, but she's not with caitlyn. in a city not her own, in a house not her own, it seems she's chosen to sit in a room alone with her thoughts, staring at the fireplace. we hear her humming the tune to a song her mother used to sing, the same one jinx was humming when we first saw her this season - vi's small comfort, the faintest memory from those before her, and nothing to leave to those after her. no roots and no legacy. she's grieving everyone and everything she's lost. stripped of will and void of purpose.

caitlyn is excited to hear vi humming a song. we don't know how long it's been since the war ended, but this implies she hasn't been doing much other than sitting by herself in silence in quite some time. she's become a shell of herself, and caitlyn is worried - she's there for her but doesn't want to push her either. she asks her if she's "still in the fight", and this is a loaded question that i can see two main meanings in - one notably sadder.

1) are you still in there?

what part of you is left, and is it strong enough to keep fighting this state you're in? do you have it in you to keep going? do you have the will to live in spite of it all? is there any fight left in you? are you still with me, or are you just in the room?

and i feel like caitlyn knows the answer but wants to hear it from vi, check in on her and encourage her to open up if she's feeling ready to. because she heard her humming to herself.

and when vi says she's the dirt under caitlyn's nails, she doesn't mean it in a cute, flirty or romantic way. she means it in a self-deprecating "i know i'm not being easy right now" kind of way.

i'm not fun to be around, to have to take care of and wait around for. i'm making things harder for you and i'm holding you back by not cooperating and just getting better. i can't help it.

and she adds onto this, "nothing's ever gonna clean me out"

you're stuck with me. i'm a nuisance to you but i can't leave you because you're all i have left. i think i'm lost and broken beyond repair. i'm crooked. i think i'll never be okay again.

2) have you given up on zaun?

are you still in on fighting the system? have you given up on trying to make others see your people for who you are? do you still have hope in the dream for unity and freedom for zaun?

it sounds like caitlyn does, and she's still up for it, just like she was in the latter half of the first season, before jinx kidnapped her, tried to get vi to kill her, and blew up the counsil building just as its members were about to vote for zaun's sovereignty, killing caitlyn's mother. but caitlyn can't do it on her own - it's vi's home, vi's people, vi's identity - and she needs to know if vi still believes they can change something.

and when vi says she's the dirt under caitlyn's nails, she doesn't literally mean caitlyn, or herself. she means the opposing poles they represent - piltover and zaun, oppressor and oppressed, a pristine policewoman and a crooked criminal. until piltover's view of the undercity and its people changes, zaun will always be a torn in its side, fighting it, defying it, trying to free itself from its clutches. small, perhaps insignificant, an inconvenience, but a part of it that it can't get rid of or erase. it'll always be there, it'll always fight back.

and when she says nothing's ever gonna clean her out, she means she'll never be bent out of shape and lose that part of herself - the ugly, dirty, raggedy part that grew up on the streets of zaun and was raised among all the tragedy, misery and poverty of the undercity. a product of the system. she'll never let that be "washed out" of her, she won't forget her origin or her goals. this is who she is, her identity - not just in the eyes of piltover, but in her own heart - a zaunite.

EDIT: i also saw this interpretation on tiktok if you're interested. to summarize: there's a spanish saying "like nails and dirt" which is used to refer to two people who are inseparable, so this is a testimony of vi's love for caitlyn having given her reason to keep going and stay by her.

[sofiareidings]

Drunk Words Are Sober Thoughts

Summary: At the New Year's party at Rossi's you have a little to much to drink and Spencer has to take you home. What will happen when the clock strikes midnight though?

A/N: Stated in the title but I'm also stating it now, this one-shot does mention alcohol. Also, thank you so much for all the love on yesterday's post! I'm going to try and post a story everyday until I start school, (September 6th) once I get back into the rhythm of school I'll try and make a posting schedule.

Word Count: 0.9k

Song Suggestions: Pacific - Sleeping At Last

Rossi had invited the entire team over for a New Years party. It had been a tough year, and everyone needed it. You spent the evening having fun, talking, dancing, and drinking.

Maybe a little too much drinking. It was thirty minutes to midnight and Garcia had finally cut you off. “I love you sweetie, but you’re sticking to water for the rest of the night.” You sighed at her comment and decided the best idea would be to vent about it to someone else.

“…and now she’s only giving me water!” You slumped back in the chair while Spencer just shook his head. He was completely sober that night and could tell how drunk you were. He knew it was time for you to go home. He stood up, putting a hand out for you to grab.

“Come on, it’s time to go home.” Taking his hand you groan and reluctantly grab your stuff while mumbling to yourself about the injustice. Once you got to Spencer’s car you turned on his radio, the first channel was a strange classical music channel and immediately changed. The next channel was counting down to midnight while playing what you assumed was the top 100.

Rossi’s mansion wasn’t far from your apartment complex and Spencer had gotten there in less than ten minutes. “Fifteen minutes till midnight! I wonder who my Near Year’s kiss will be. This next song is…” When the song started you stopped listening and turned to Spencer.

“I don’t want to be alone at midnight, can we stay here until then please?” The sentence came out a lot sadder than you expected. “And then if you’re here at midnight…I can have a New Year’s kiss.”

“Y/N…you’re drunk.” His face was red, you were drunk. He knew that but, the quote, ‘drunk words are sober thoughts.’ was all he could think of. He didn’t want to take advantage of the state you were in and didn’t dare try to make any advances. “We can stay here until midnight.”

“Only ten minutes until midnight folks! Here’s number two on…”

You were at the emotional stage of drunkenness, it was quite evident by the way you cried a little while talking. “You’re so cute, Spence. Whenever you make that little confused face when I talk about pop culture I can’t help but die inside because you look so pretty. Like a lost puppy…and when you wave instead of shaking someone's hand because shaking hands are gross or whatever I just melt. And everytime you wear your glasses I can’t focus on anything other than your cuteness…”

He was blushing hard but was still making sure not to take anything serious. “T-thanks Y/N, I really appreciate that…” His sentence trailed off as he watched your hand grab onto his arm and stay there. The butterflies were going crazy and he knew he needed to get out of here. “Why don’t I take you up to your apartment? I’ll stay till midnight but I want to make sure you make it the full way home.”

“That’s such a good idea, why didn’t I think of it!” You groaned while going to open the car door. The handle was jammed, when Spencer noticed he got out of the car leaving you alone in the car for a second.

“Six minutes until midnight! Here is the last song of the night folks…”

The door opened and there he stood, holding your bag and jacket waiting to take you upstairs. Opening the front door of the building you looked at your phone clock.

“11:57” You stated while he hit the elevator button. While waiting you managed to make your way to the live broadcast of the ball drop in New York.

“We are two minutes and fifteen seconds away from midnight!”

The elevator opened and you hit the button to take you to the third floor.

“Would you look at that, only a minute and twenty seconds left everyone.”

Spencer grabbed your hand and walked you towards your apartment while you listened to the announcer blasting from your phone.

“Thirty seconds!”

A loud countdown started on your phone while Spencer looked for your house key in your bag. You watched him try every key.

“Ten!”

You hear a little click and he starts turning the key.

“Nine!”

The key gets stuck in place.

“Eight!”

He jimmies with the key.

Seven!”

The lock finally opens.

“Six!”

The door opens and you walk in.

“Five!”

You lean against the wall while Spencer shuts the door.

“Four!”

He turns your hallway light on.

“Three!”

You hear the sound of your purse hitting the table.

“Two!”

Spencer walks back over to you, preparing to say goodnight after the countdown.

“One!”

In a moment of drunken boldness you wrap your hands around his neck and press your lips against his. He’s shocked and stumbles back a little, not sure what to do. You can feel his arm wrap around your waist tightly. After a couple seconds you let go and stagger backwards smiling. “Happy New Year’s.”

“Yeah, happy New Year’s…” He’s still in shock but makes sure that you make it to bed before leaving.

‘Drunk words are sober thoughts.’

Walking back down to the parking lot his mind is full of so many different thoughts. He’s not sure how seriously he should take your advances. What if you won’t remember them in the morning? What if it isn’t what you really feel? The final thought, one that had been coming back to him all night.

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

OK BUT SPENCER'S AND BAU TEAM REACTION TO TTPD????

spencer reid x famous!reader

warnings: miscarriage (will put a warning before and after), im basing most of the mention/emotions of miscarriages with my experience with my sister who has gone through a couple while she was trying for a baby as well as research i did, mention of weed

note: this has taken a while to write cause i wanted to interpret the songs on my own time before applying then to the au, so i hope it was worth the wait!

this quickly became my analysis of the songs (in the context of the au) rather than the bau's reactions

feel free to send a message to my inbox about what you think their reactions would be/fav songs i love hearing about that stuff from y'all 🩷

Fortnight (ft. Post Malone)

I don't picture this song to be about Spencer. I see it as more fictional in the way folklore and evermore were more fictional inspired by different things that have happened in her life. Also I feel like Emily likes Post Malone so she was excited for this song, and Penny love the ai fortnight but love the real fortnight better.

Spencer is always worried when a sadder song comes out that it's about him, but reader always reassures him that it's not and that she loves him.

The Tortured Poets Department

THIS SONG IS SO SPENCER REID CODED. "you're in self-sabotage mode" !!!!

I feel like this is Rossi's fav off the album 🤷‍♀️

I said this in an ask a while ago but sometime in 2020, maybe 2021, they had a sort of break and this song was written during that time for sure.

"but you told Penny you'd kill if I ever leave, and I said that to Jack about you so I felt seen, everyone we know why it's meant to be, cause we're... crazy" I feel like this line really explains the break they were on. Like they were so co-dependant and loved each other so much that it was the problem. Everyone knows they're meant for each other but they still get in their own way, Spencer with not wanting to get married when reader did, and reader not wanting Spencer to spend so much time with work. And they just weren't thinking of the same things at that time.

My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys

"He saw forever so he smashed it up" reminds me of "i wouldn't marry me either" but in 'you're losing me' she's blaming herself for the break whereas in this song she realized that it was Spencer and his commitment issues. Which always makes me think of the line "I'll tell you that he runs because he loves me" which can be seen as a really sad line but I think in this instance it's that she wants to accept him for all his faults, he's going to run sometimes when he gets scared but he always comes back, and they're working on that.

"Once i fix me, he's gonna mix me" reminds me very much like 'you're losing me'

"Stole my tortured heart, felt all these broken parts, told me I'm better off... but I'm not" do I have to say commitment issues and self-sabotage again?

Down Bad

Emily loves this song. She loves the vibes, she loves the lyrics, just everything.

In my eyes, it's about Spencer. Reminds me of "told me I'm better off... but I'm not."

So Long, London

Penelope's favourite part of the album is the opening of this song, first time hearing it she said it sounded like wedding bells.

In Virginia there's a town called New London thats 2hrs from Quantico... It's meant to be.

"Pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away" you guys gonna make me say commitment issues every time?

She's clearly talking about her side of when they both weren't communicating and how he hurt her when he couldn't commit.

She really thought it was over when she wrote this.

But Daddy I Love Him

The shock in that room when she said "I'm having his babies!"... Derek found it hilarious, the girls were having a heart attack.

I think she's not not writing about Spencer in this song. Idk how else to explain, like it's kinda about backlash from every time she gets in a relationship no matter with who, which happened with Spencer so she's talking about that but not that exclusively. Does that make sense?

Fresh Out The Slammer

I think this song is about getting out of a relationship and now you're free to be with someone else who you've had your eye on. This song was written so long ago it's basically a rep vault track. In this au when reader and Spencer met reader was with Tom (i think??) but still gave Spencer her number and called him after she broke up with Tom, and that was the birth of this song.

Florida!!! (ft. Florence + The Machine)

Written about the idea of getting away, taking a break from life, while her and Spencer were on their break. She needed a break, all her friends were either single and smell like weed or they had kids and she wanted kids, but Spencer wasn't ready, so she had to get away from what reminded her of him.

Guilty as Sin?

"What if he's written 'mine' on my upper thigh only in my mind" she's imagining what it would be like if they got back together.

Is the second half of this song when she says "they're gonna crucify me anyway,,, i choose you and me, religiously.." And the song sounds like it ended but they she comes back in with the chorus, cause she thought it was over but now they're back better than ever.

"One slip falling into a hedge maze" a labyrinth is a hedge maze, because she fell back in love.

The last "Am I allowed to cry" is almost like can I cry from relieve? Relieve that it worked.

Who's Afraid Of Little Old Me?

This song is Spencer Reid coded.

Derek and Emily love badass-ery of this song. Pen loves the production "I love the production of this song!" "I'll pass that along to Jack."

Spencer just can't help but tell her he loves and is proud of her after hearing it.

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

This is about a past relationship, no way can I see this to be about Spencer.

I feel like JJ really likes this song.

loml

This song was written, probably not too long after 'you're losing me' when they had that break and she was in the depression stage. She wrote this when she thought she lost him, she thought she did all she could and still lost him.

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart

warning!!!miscarriage

I had written down the idea of them having miscarriage in my notes app a couple weeks or maybe even a month before the album, cause of the song 'bigger than the whole sky' and when I heard this song with this in mind it broke my heart, that I knew I had to do it.

I'm thinking they were trying for a while and having lots of trouble, then stopped when the tour idea was falling in place, but she ended up miscarrying during the practice for the tour while not knowing she was pregnant. Likely she didn't know because she was on birth control and because she was working so hard and so busy with Midnights and the tour.

So with all the trouble they were having trying to get pregnant, Spencer was grieving in his own way, sadly it hurt reader a lot. He was angry, he probably said things he didn't mean, they were both feeling so much sadness and anger and they couldn't handle it. I think at this time, they were still going to bed every night together, but it was off and they no longer spent time together. Spencer needed the time to himself, when all reader needed was time with him (want to be clear no one is in the wrong in this situation, it's just a fucking bad situation)

"He said he'd love me all his life, but that life was too short" has two meaning (they were having a boy)

"I can hold my breath, I've been doing it since he left. I keep finding his things in drawers, crucial evidence I didn't imagine the whole time, I'm sure I can pass this test." 😭 Like referring to her baby, and since they'd been trying before they had a couple baby things like clothes that she couldn't stop herself from getting in hopes 😭😭😭

end of warning

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

Every verse I see as being about a different relationship. Working on re-records it's bring up old feelings and I think she just collectively put all the feelings into this song.

Spencer was beyond scared it was about him, he was already apologizing for making her feel that way before she could tell him it's not about him.

The Alchemy

This idea I have is so silly, that I think it works???

Spencer once said off-handedly that his job was kinda like football, it was strategy, and you failed a lot but sometimes things just fell into place like a puzzle. And reader ran with that idea, like she couldn't sleep that bight and just had the silly thought of Spencer, her Spencer, playing football and wrote this. Little off topic but I also think this about 'Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince' lol

Clara Bow

The self-name drop. The team's jaws were on the floor, their eyes were wide. When Pen realizes she's like "DID YOU JUST DAY YOUR OWN NAME??!?"

The Black Dog

Maybe like the team was seeing how Spencer was down recently and brought him out to a bar after work.

And Spencer didn't 'forget' to turn off his location he never did because he still had the hope that the relationship wasn't over, that this was just a rough patch.

imgonnagetyouback

Spoiler alert: she got him back.

Because no matter how much they hurt each other they're in love. And it reminds me of a boygenius lyric "You could absolutely break my heart, that's how I know that we're in love." that lyric in bodies them.

The Albatross

This is like a sister song to 'peace'

This song to me is obviously about the narrative that she's the problem. She's the one destroying all her relationships.

And she's telling Spencer in this song "I've been through this before, it doesn't matter."

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

This song is her thinking about them seeing other people. Her imagining him with other people, how much that hurts.

And around 2020-2021 maybe there were rumours about her seeing some athlete or something cause of 'And you saw my bones out with somebody new, who seemed like he would've bullied you in school'

And maybe not the entire song is about him (that's me trying to make him sound better) I see it as mostly her thinking off some what-ifs.

I think they both caused each other a lot of pain, but their love out-ways that completely.

How Did It End?

Written the same night as the Black Dog and she's thinking about what Spencer tells the team.

I see the fact she says 'it's happening again' instead of 'it's happened again' tells us that this is not a sure thing, she's thinking about what people will think if it does end.

So High School

What if it's just a lover vault track lol.

I Hate It Here

I think Penny really likes this song.

It's definitely written in the state of mind of the prophecy, that she's just not meant to be loved but she wants to so badly. So she escapes into her mind which I picture is folklore/evermore.

thanK you aIMee

They love the petty vibes, probably was Penny that first showed or sent a TikTok of North listening to reader's music and was like "girl, you see this yet?"

I Look in People's Windows

In this au I see this as a folklore or evermore vault track.

The Prophecy

Very similar to 'how did it end' and 'i hate it here'

Cassandra

Again it's very similar to 'mad women' so maybe she chose which one to put on folklore and put the other on this album.

Peter

I think she wrote this as a break up song, with a lot of metaphors but what sticks out to me is in the bridge.

"Cause loves never lost when perspective is earned, and you said you'd come and get me but you were 25,,,forgive me peter please know that i tried to hold on to the days that you were mine."

Spencer was 25 in this au when they met and it's so perfect and sad and I love it.

The Bolter

In this au the 'She' in this song is reader.

Robin

I feel boring by saying I think it's another track written in the fictional world of folklore and evermore, but for the au that's what I think!

The Manuscript

In the directors on directors interview she called the All too well short film script 'the manuscript' that's all the evidence I need.

Spencer encouraged her to write this song, because he saw all the emotions she was dealing with while writing/directing the short film.

[dreaminofu]

I have an ask :) what is the angstiest bojere moment for you? when you thought they'll break your heart for real now 💔

When I went through different bojere moments in my mind, I realised that they don’t have a lot of angsty moments. Or at least not many obvious kind of angsty moments. You asked for one, I’m giving you more because that’s how we work in this house.

1. In the end, my number one has to be this

Yes, this moment is soft but it’s also oh so angsty. It’s Jere being sad over losing and he clings to Bojan as the one thing that keeps him afloat. Just look at Jere’s expression, it’s filled with sadness, but Bojan is his rock here, holding Jere tightly but tenderly, even when he’s battling with his own sadness.

Bojan once said that he was sadder about Jere’s second place than JO finishing 21st.

This photo also symbolises that they have to say goodbye soon. While they’d formed a strong bond, they’d only known each other for about a month. They live on the opposite sides of Europe and had super busy schedules ahead. In one interview, Jere said that after the final, one of the reasons he cried in the bathroom was because he didn’t know when he’d see Bojan again. They must have felt very unsure about everything.

So yeah, this moment is peak bojere angst for me 💔

More under the cut

2. The Bojan beer picture

Jere is holding ”Bojan” tenderly against his cheek. His expression is a mixture of deep caring, sadness and wistfulness. This was around the time when Bojan was presumably struggling a bit, had had his panic attack and deleted his ig. And I’m sure they were missing each other like crazy. This photo is to me a sweet way of publically saying ”I’m here for you. I know things are tough, but always know that I support you and I’m here.”

3. This JO tiktok

They’re listening to a Balkan song (Ludo scre), and the part of the song they have in the video is ”the moment I saw you with another I realised I was losing you forever”.

No further explanation needed.

[ivoryand-gold]

Epic The Musical Reaction: Thunder Saga ⛈️⚡️⛈️⚡️⛈️⚡️

SO many thoughts and feelings after the Troy & Cyclops Sagas (Jorge’s Version) and THUNDER SAGA. this is a LONG one, but i’ve put what i can put into words, so here my initial 24 hour-post release reaction! Spoilers galore ahead!

TROY

THE HORSE AND THE INFANT

the ensemble is *chef’s kiss*

i love how gentle Jay’s voice is when he’s singing “penelope” and “telemachus”

the battle clashing is so good!!

overall Luke’s voice is a little softer and feels less thunderous than og so i wonder if that was to contrast thunder bringer? not a complaint just an interesting choice!

don’t love the change to “i don’t think you’re ready” but the rest of zeus’ part is gorgeous

he sounds like a kid pleading, making thunder bringer even sadder when he does it again later 😭😭😭

JUST A MAN

instrumental has a chokehold on me and Jay’s vocals are so smooth

“the view” drop is a lovely choice

😭😭😭 “who’s fighting for his life” 😭😭😭

THE STRINGSSSSSS

od’s first “im just a man” being so soft and now in comparison to eurylochus’ version is devastating

FULL SPEED AHEAD

i like how Jay’s voice starts soft and builds power as he’s shaking the guilt of the infant in order to lead his men again

Armando is just so solid. truly the most consistent and solid vocals, which is perfect for the purpose his character serves in the first act of the story

i love every once in a while Jorge makes a surprising pronunciation choice that just tickles me

there were a few specific lines i was worried would lose their magic but “you and i’ll go ahead” still sounds perfect

again, ensemble is eatinggg

OPEN ARMS

Steven stuck out so much to me for some reason. more so when i listened on my tv, but still a bit on my phone as well. the mixing on him feels a little off compared to everyone else to my ear, which is odd compared to the bell-like perfect clarity the stolen version has. this isn’t a diss to Steven, he has a beautiful voice and is the perfect polites which may be why this production difference sticks out more than any one else’s. idk maybe i’m tripping but it feels like he lost some of the innocence in his voice as a result 🥺

i wonder if the lotus eaters sound a little deeper to distinguish them from the winions

i love the “nom nom nom,” “scary cave,” and “that way” 😂😂😂

WARRIOR OF THE MIND

Teagan is so solid it’s unreal, athena songs can’t help but be bops and aside from the “villain god songs” are my favs

thought it was “you lied to me,” not “enlighten me” until yesterday 😅

CYCLOPS

POLYPHEMUS

ik after the ts master’s heist that re-recorded masters have to be distinguishable for legal reasons, but it’s so interesting what and how choices were made here, such as polyphemus’ voice change

“watch out” and the mixing leading into Survive is perfection

SURVIVE

the fighting is excellent

OKAY GUITAR???

the harmonizing is stunning

the deaths are even more brutal 😭😭

ik he squished polites but polyphemus is so pitiful and they are in his house, you could never make me hate him in this version 🥺 (in hades 2 yeah fuck that guy lolol)

REMEMBER THEM

eurylochus screaming is very good

Jay’s vocals are DELICIOUS!! this song might be the biggest improvement for him.

the crew sounds more reverential and mournful while od grows in anger throughout which i like how that builds into the name reveal

GAH od’s no and athena’s no are both more terrifying now that they exchanged energy

background vocals during the build to his name reveal seem much more pronounced, which is interesting but i love it

“hey cyclops” really feels like the culmination of all the anger in this songs and then we get hit with the new “odysseus”

MY GOODBYE

platonic breakup song of my dreams 😩😩😩

oooh that growl on “waste” is everything

her disappointment is a little sadder in this one

nailed it, kept the magic, i have nothing but love for this song

RE-RECORDINGS OVERALL

Jorge’s vocals are so much clearer throughout and his acting is so much more nuanced! I didn’t have any criticism for the original version before, but having them to compare now makes me really appreciate his growth and depth of understanding of the character arc Ody’s on in the new ones.

the mixing is so smooth and I LOVE the new vocals for the ensemble

STRINGSSS

such a glow up on the cover art!!!

every song was either an improvement or just as good, but i need more time with open arms to decipher my full feelings on that one

i’m really glad Jorge did this.

⭐️ REMINDER: STREAM NEW VERSIONS ONLY FROM NOW ON SO MR JALAPEÑO CAN BE HELLA PAID YO ⭐️

now…

THUNDER

SUFFERING

i didn’t consider Jorge had lied about the sirens not being included until the end, so at first i thought it was a dream or something, but realized the heavy production meant some god/monster fuckery + the repeated trying to get him in the water + use of Penelope’s voice it became apparent to me just in time for the turn.

this song is so cute and ridiculous

the tonal dissonance was jarring but then on additional passes it’s so perfect to express how out of place what’s happening is. it’s confusing because it’s wrong

Anna’s delivery of “of course” and “oh no” are so playful, i love that he found an creative way to include more penelope

shy my ass lolol that was around when it clicked

also since they’re sirens, this is what he wants to hear most which is sad to think about if this is how he desires their marriage to be when he returns 😓. no matter of love or support can fix all the pain and guilt he’ll carry the rest of his life, but that hope is all he has

DIFFERENT BEAST

i love that “my real wife knows” is gonna probably mirror penelope saying something like “my real husband would know” in the ithaca saga

the layering of voices in the chorus

12 years or so is SO funny

i’d be scared so shitless

“nah you wouldn’t have spared me” and “let them drown” delivery

the crew’s turn from “we” to “he” then od singing “kill them all” before the following 3 songs is UNHINGED

SCYLLA

i was most excited for this song going in and was NOT disappointed!

scylla vocals in the backdrop to eurylochus’ confession feels reminiscent of puppeteer after his attempted confession with circe layered over. this time odysseus makes a different choice 😭

not much to say > i’ve got a secret > i opened the windbag > *silence* > light up 6 torches no words just ????????

DROWN - CHOKE - BLEED is so crunchy i want to mix it into my granola

the monstrous scylla belting is EVERYTHING and left me wanting so much more, so i guess i just have to repeat this song forever (but if Jay wants to release a Scylla extended cut i would be the #1 supporter)

“we are the same you and i” after his transformation into the monster is the stuff music is made for

MUTINY

luck runs out reprisal with the strings is gonna be the end of me

“crazy and mad”

he said gaslight me PLSSSS

eurylochus losing his mind with the loss of his faith in od will leave me in shambles for the foreseeable future

“SAY SOMETHING”

“I CANT” 😬😬😬

electric guitar is guitarringggg

there is no price he won’t pay- the moment of clarity for the crew

yeah od why did you think they’d still trust you lol

im still not over the fact that burr and hamilton switching it up at the end is what sealed their fates and i imagine the same will remain true of ody and eury repeating that devastating irony

i wasn’t sure who would win the duel or if they’d keep the cows in, so as soon as i heard that cow i was like it’s over they’re so cooked they can’t conceive of how bad this is gonna be. helios don’t play about those cows (even though i’m inclined to think Jorge is switching it to be apollo for the sake of simplicity for epic which would also explain why apollo’s part of god games is still unknown even though his part is first)

wind god/sun god is so special to me

eurylochus isn’t himself anymore, odysseus was his hope

“please don’t tell me you’re about to do what i think you’ll do”

“ODY-“ brb screaming crying throwing up

“im just a man” 😭

he didn’t even get to enjoy a final meal, they died for nothing and it’s so damn sad

the acting in this may be the best in the entire musical

“captain?” 🥺😭 his hunger is so great and his spirit is so broken

“WHO DO YOU THINK HE’LL SEND???” is so desperate and well delivered

⚡️⚡️⚡️THUNDER BRINGER⚡️⚡️⚡️

the thunder and chanting and electric guitar and percussion and LUKE’S VOICE and-

the lyrical implications are so appropriately horrible but the beat is seductive and his voice is so powerful and it slides and shoots like lightning strikes or thunder rumbling might- culminating into a banger that captures the king of the gods’ essence perfectly. he is divine judgment and i would say that he abuses that but he doesn’t even see it that way. you implicitly can’t refuse his power, you never had the option and it’s terrifying and so damn zeus.

i truly have no notes that aren’t appreciation and awe. i won’t declare so definitively out of awareness that recency bias is in play, but this may best ruthlessness as my favorite.

odysseus will hate rain and the ocean for the rest of his life, they mean one of the big 3 is coming to fuck up his whole life 😅😅😅

“tell me” and “enlighten me” have me so giddy, he’s enjoying himself so much lol

so many GORGEOUS line deliveries in this whole song. this entire song is GORGEOUS line deliveries. one of my favs is how “choose” and “you or your crew” is said like a gentle interlude for the showier singing but is the most devastating part. the climax is in the quiet for this song

“please don’t make me do this” callback is lethal. odysseus never would’ve made another choice but the way they respectively play out and how he feels about them are brutal.

“let me take the suffering from you” he’s drawing from the siren’s version of penelope to convince himself he can live with the guilt. he uses her as an excuse time and time again to do the worst things, so much so that that’s how he sees her now. he’s desperate for her to be that because how else can he face himself? the one time he looked inward he saw a monster, no wonder he always has to look to/for her.

“captain?”

“i have to see her”

“but we’ll die”

“i know”

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

they sound like scared children and i’m NOT OKAY. eurylochus gave everything for 12 years and odysseus told him he would do ANYTHING to save eury specifically when he risked his life for the pig-ified crew and not only was that not true, he ultimately chose to let him and 35 other men die in a final betrayal after withering his hope, faith, and mind. odysseus is devastated and racked with guilt but it was never a choice. he merely sees himself more honestly now, not the hero he saw in the mirror at the start of the journey, or even back on aeaea.

ik it’s the chorus but also it’s just like zeus to make it about himself again as he decimates these men. his all-powerful divine judgement is his right and stands as his thesis, as ruthlessness for mercy of self does for poseidon.

it sounds like a lullaby at the end like it does in THATI and Just a Man. innocence has died for the final time, there’s nothing good in him left to sacrifice. all he has is the hope that what’s left can still be loved and accepted by penelope because his love of self is gone. yet all that remains is selfishness. he’s calcified into himself, and this makes me hungry to re-read his character study in Circe by Madeline Miller because they do the same thing: Epic reveals this truth through his own perception of himself while Circe does it through the memories of those who loved him and most desperately wanted to the lies he believed about himself to be true.

FINAL THOUGHTS

i will NEVER hate eurylochus. he was top 3 before, but after this saga he is definitively my favorite character. were there devastating consequences to his actions? i mean yeah but also odysseus expected unconditional faith after making the original decision that put them in danger in the first place. his grief and/or pride (depending on how you interpret epic’s depiction of od) and ignoring eury/athena is what put them all in poseidon’s sights. he was clever, yes, but what did that ultimately amount to? it makes all the sense in the world that eurylochus lost faith in his cleverness when he saw the consequences and then just when od earned back his trust, he sacrificed 6 of their men without even trying to be clever. it’s all tragic and if you’re withholding criticism for od but can’t hold nuance for eury then we are having very different experiences, idk what to tell you lol.

danger motifffff

i hope the crew haunts od’s ass so we can hear them again, but either way what an expertly executed ending for those characters and that chapter of odysseus’ life. brava.

this may be the best saga. again- recency bias- but it’s certainly going to be one of the best when all is said and done. THANK YOU JAY. THANK YOU ARMANDO. THANK YOU ANNA. THANK YOU LUKE. THANK YOU KJ.

so far my ranking is reverse track order

i hope we get the wisdom saga sooner than later because i’m greedy for good art lol but i’d wait however long Jay needs for another saga as well executed as this one

10/10 acting, 10/10 singing, 10/10 production. so much heart, skill, and talent has been put into this project and i’m really happy to be on this journey of appreciating and analyzing it with y’all in real time ☺️

i’m most looking forward to calypso and penelope as characters, but god games, get in the water, and hold them down as songs in each of the remaining sagas. (also my boy hephaestus)

if you made it this far, holy shit thank you. if you have money to spare please sponsor a family on Operation Olive Branch, also stream songs with proceeds being raised for liberation (such as Revolutin’ by Amira Unplugged), and Free Palestine, Congo, Sudan, Tigray, West Papúa, Haití, Hawaii, Armenia, Uyghur, and Turtle Island til it’s backwards! None of us are free until we’re all free.

[tjjamess]

Im watching a different Les Mis YouTube bootleg every day for a week (because I’m actually insane) so here is a little dump of my thoughts and little details I liked about each one.

Day 1

12/05/2007 Broadway Production

Https://youtu.be/oLOGOiK3zCM?si=_U2Ry5HBa84OfKxY

This is the one that started this whole things cause I heard that Grantaire played the guitar

One song in an Javert and Valjean Are far closer than they need to be

Like was it really necessary to get that close (not that I’m complaining obviously)

Also this Javert kinda… *gets sprizted with water*

omg Fantine’s actress was so good I can’t even comprehend

Like look at that ^

magnificent!

The Thenardiers lean very far into the comedy relief characters

Gary Beach as M. Thenardier!!!

Gavroche was such an icon this performance

favourite character fr fr

and he had a little red bandanna in his costume and I just love that so much

Grantaire carrys him on his shoulders in one day more and he stands with Enjolras in do you hear the people sing

Speaking of one day more this performance was really good

but back to Gavroche…

im gonna pull a Javert cause when Gavroche goes to collect the bullets it’s NOT HIS LITTLE PEOPLE SONG AND IS INSTEAD A MUCH SADDER VERSION

im just gonna attach the video cause omg I can’t

Gavroche’s actor was so good man

he sounded so fucking scared I’m crying

On a lighter note I loved cosette so much her actress was actually so gorgeous and so good

A heart full of love was actually hilarious though

cosette kept turning the other direction every time Marius looked at her to the point she would run after him then turn on her heels in like two seconds flat

AND there was a moment when Marius introduces Eponine and Cosette and they just stare at each other for a long moment I can’t even

Eponines actress was very very good

she sounded a little like she was trying to sing like Frances Ruffelle but she was good so I’m not complaining

A little fall of rain was so sad in this one man

she tried to give him one last kiss before she died but she DIDNT GET TO AAAA

Enjolras hugs Marius and Grantaire shares his drink with him after a little fall of rain!!

then of course guitar Grantaire and accordion Jehan are a highlight

The sillies

Javert soliloquy was a masterpiece but to be fair I say that about every version of Javert’s soliloquy

but you see what I mean when I say Javert kinda…. No! No! Not the spray bottle again!!

I suspend my hate on Marius for this actor cause he was really good I really like his voice and he was a silly little guy

Empty chairs at empty tables hurt my soul

the wedding was absolutely gorgeous the lighting was so good I can’t

Like look how pretty that is ^^^^

i cried like 3 times with was a very good cast very nice very nice

the camera quality wasn’t too bad (other than the few times the camera would get hidden but eh what can you do)

very good I would probably rewatch this bootleg again

[greetings-inferiors]

River song is the best executed story arc in all of fiction (at least all that I’ve seen) and it’s not even close

Her first appearance is her death, both the audience and the doctor don’t know anything about her, but she already knows everything about him. Imagine a woman greets you with a kiss and says she’s your wife but you’ve never seen her before.

When she dies, sure it’s sad because a character we’ve spent two hours getting to know just died, but it’s not any sadder than that.

But then she turns up later. And again. And again. We learn to fall in love with the character, just like the doctor, but always with the nagging thought that any day could be the day when she goes to the library, and meets her end. We learn how interconnected her and the doctor are, we watch them get married, and eventually we see her one last time in a glorious send off to the character, the last time she saw the doctor before going to the library.

But that’s not where the story ends.

On a rewatch, you get the silence in the library, and you see this character that you’ve grown to love over whole doctor’s lifespans, but the doctor doesn’t recognise you. Now, you’re in river’s shoes. You understand all the references she makes, but the doctor is just blank. And when she sacrifices herself, you realise that the last time she saw the doctor was exactly what you saw in the last river episode. It’s so flawlessly executed over a whole decade, and I love her to pieces.

[blues824]

Here With Me - Lilia Vanrouge x Reader

YOU SIMPS WON. FOR THAT REASON THIS HAS SOME MAJOR ANGST

@roxanavanrouge2400​ gave me an idea that I took inspiration from. Thanks, bestie!

The song is Here With Me, by d4vd.

Lilia Vanrouge

He was a very old fae with a lot of history behind him, but what a lot of people don’t know is that he had a spouse. You were his beloved Y/N, and you both first met when you were placed under his command. You quickly rose through the ranks and became his lieutenant. Unfortunately, along the way, you both made too many enemies and one of them got to you.

Now, you were but a distant memory to Lilia.The spouse of Vanrouge was no more, and Mr. Vanrouge was a widower. Not even Malleus remembers what you look like, which was a sad reality. Silver never got a chance to see his would-be-adoptive parent.

Even though it has been centuries, he still remembers the sound of your voice and the feeling of your hands in his. He may not remember your face clearly as your image has been weathered after so many years, he will always remember your wedding day.

It was a joyous occasion for all who attended, and it was the majority of the Briar Valley. That wasn’t uncommon, though, since Lilia was a very decorated general and you were his lieutenant. The two of you were “as thick as thieves, but as strong as heroes”, as per the words of the Queen.

Lilia sighed a heavy, melancholy sigh as he laid in his bedchambers in the Diasomnia dormitory. He looked at his desk where a framed picture stayed, and it was a photo of the portrait of the two of you on the aforementioned day. More memories started flooding into his head.

For example, your wedding attire. It was black, as per the custom of the Briar Valley, and you looked ravishing. In fact, as the bat fae saw you walking down the aisle, one of the many thoughts that went into his head was that he couldn’t wait until you both were in the privacy of your new home, if you know what I mean.

He quickly snapped out of it, seeing that it was very late at night and that he had some early classes the next day. The ex-general liked to keep a sharp sleep routine on school days so that he could lead his ‘sons’ by example. Plus, he needed to be energized if he was going to carry out his duty as Malleus’s guardian.

But once he entered the sweet abyss we call ‘sleep’, he was met by you. You looked happy to see him, and he was definitely very happy to see you. However, he knew that it wasn’t real. It never would be. That didn’t mean he wouldn’t indulge himself this one time, so he ran into your arms.

At that moment, he knew he would never want to wake up as long as you were there, and he wanted to be selfish and actually go through with it. However, there were people who depended on him and it just made him sadder to see you. You could sense it, and pulled away to hold his face.

“What are you doing here, darling?” He asked.

“You called for me.” Oh, your voice was exactly how he remembered it. “But I do have to leave soon.”

“Please don’t! I’m not ready to let you go…” He exclaimed desperately.

“Alright, my love. I will give you one last dance. Be wise in choosing,” you gave him a wink as you led him to a few records. Some of them were classics, and some were more modern songs. Each of them were about keeping someone close to you because you love them so much.

He selected a modern one that he enjoyed, and he took the record out of the sleeve and put it into the gramophone. The song started playing, and Lilia made his way to you and bowed down while extending his hand to you… just like he had on your wedding day.

You placed your hand in his, causing him to pull you into his chest. He was in his more mature form, so he was taller than usual. He looked around a bit as the music started, and he recognized your surroundings; it was your wedding venue. It was exactly the same, save for you being alone.

Then the lyrics started up:

Watch the sun rise along the coast

As we’re both getting old

I can’t describe what I’m feeling

He wasn’t even paying attention to the words. He was just happy to be back in your arms once again. He missed the feeling so much, and he hadn’t realized it until now. Upon looking again, you both were back in your wedding attire, and you looked just as dazzling as you did then.

And all I know is we’re going home

So please don’t let me go, oh

Don’t let me go, oh-oh-oh

You both had started swaying side-to-side, getting used to the melody of the very sad song. You knew exactly why he chose this one to dance to, but you knew that you couldn’t stay. No magic was strong enough to bring you back, and your soul needed rest.

And if it’s right

I don’t care how long it takes

As long as I’m with you

I’ve got a smile on my face

Lilia gently let you go and spun you around, only to bring you back into him. He did indeed have a smile on his face, but it wasn’t the happy one that you remember seeing at your wedding. No, it was a smile that was trying to hide pain so that he could savor his last few moments with you.

Save your tears, it’ll be okay

All I know is you’re here with me

Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

The feeling of his dearly departed spouse wiping the flowing tears away was one that brought him both comfort and anguish. He closed his eyes, trying to memorize the way your touch upon his face felt. For a former soldier, your hands were gentle and kind, and he let out a huff of laughter at the thought.

Watch the sunrise as we're getting old, oh-oh

I can't describe, whoa-oh

That’s when he noticed that your surroundings were changing once again. It wasn’t a different scene, it was that everything was fading away in sparks. His grip on you tightened, fearful of the prospect of you fading away as well.

��I wish I could live through every memory again

Just one more time before we float off in the wind”

He whispered the lyrics so that only you would hear, not that it mattered anyway since you two were the only ones there. The entirety of the background faded away, and the trail of your wedding outfit was breaking off piece-by-piece into butterflies. You seemed to be going at a much slower rate than everything else, so Lilia knew that time was running out.

And all the time we spent

Waiting for the light to take us in

Have been the greatest moments of my life

Both of you leaned in so that your foreheads were touching. Tears streamed down both of your faces in a beautiful but sorrowful way. You didn’t want to leave, but you knew that you had to so that he could move on.

The butterflies were nearing your waist, but you were still moving back and forth as your husband led you in the small dance. It was very out of character to hear the sniffles and sobs coming from him, and it only broke your heart even more.

I don't care how long it takes

As long as I'm with you, I've got a smile on my face

Save your tears, it'll be okay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay-ay-ay-ay

Now, the two of you were aware that faes were not immortal. You would meet Lilia again once he has passed over. However, that wouldn’t be for a very long while. As much as he would love to continue dancing with you in the afterlife, he had 3 boys to look after.

What was left of you was your shoulders up. Your beloved took a long look at you, hoping to preserve you in his memory until his last breath. But, he could tell that this would be like any dream: he would forget just a few moments after he woke up. You quickly pulled him into a long and deep kiss, hoping to convey each word you wanted to say through that act of affection.

Yeah, if with me

Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

I can't describe, oh, oh

In just a few moments, he was left kissing air. What was left of you was a single black butterfly, which resembled the type of fae you were. It flapped its wings a little as it was perched on the bridge of his nose. It was your final goodbye.

“Old man!” Silver shouted.

Lilia quickly sat up in his bed, disoriented until he spotted his dear son. He let out a shaky sigh of relief before quickly wiping the stray tear from his eyes. The memory of his dream quickly came flooding back into his mind, and he quickly went to write it down so that he would never forget, all-the-while Silver was confused as to what his father was doing.

[sterlingsilver-starlight]

Talk Too Much 💘

Pairing: Park Seonghwa x Female Reader

Genres: Hurt/comfort, angst, drama, fluff, romance

Content Warnings: flashbacks of emotional abuse (reader has emotionally abusive mother), self-harm (briefly graphic), implied suicidal thoughts, brief strong language (mild throughout), intimate moments (very steamy makeout session, but nothing further)

Word Count: 3195 words

Summary: When Reader excuses herself to the bathroom, Seonghwa begins to grow suspicious as minutes turn into an unusually long absence. Can he unravel the truth behind her melancholy, and perhaps something deeper?

Inspirations: During the sadder parts, “Kamihitoe” by Uru and this slowed/reverbed version of Lolo Zouaï’s “Desert Rose” were my comfort. And then for the cute parts, BLACKSWAN’s “Cat & Mouse” :)

(I love the title GIF for this 🤭 but I also am still recovering from the Arriba one…I swear, I will not be the same when the full song drops in a week 😩🥵) I had something like an epiphany while writing this…the comforting words resonate on many levels, and I had to remind myself that people like that do exist out there. Even if there is someone in your life who throws harsh words or vibes your way, that’s not to say someone who does the exact opposite might not cross paths with you, too ✨🫶🏼

Also please note: This is in no way supposed to represent or depict the actual Park Seonghwa; this is just created for storytelling/entertainment purposes only :D

A hard swallow, followed by the relentless jab of another burgeoning stomachache. You set your fork down again, barely scraping the potatoes at the edge of your plate. 

“Hwa, I…I don’t feel too good. I can’t eat this right now.”

He gave you a sympathetic smile as you got up from your seat. “It’s alright. Just…let me know if you need something. Okay?”

You offered a small smile, biting your lip. “Y-yeah. Okay.”

The bite dug deep enough to draw blood, but you tasted nothing like iron on your tongue. It was a flavor you had become all too accustomed to, one too bittersweet to fully enjoy or shy away from.

As soon as you were out of your friend’s line of sight, you bolted down the hall for the bathroom, only slowing down once you’d gone inside and shut the door. 

A click at the knob. A snap of the fingers, idiosyncratically, to distract yourself from the sudden echo the lock gave. Did he hear that?

You hoped to God not. 

Seonghwa was your most trusted confidant, but even the strongest of bonds could harbor skeletons in the closet, so as far as you were concerned, it would need to stay that way until you were able to get over this on your own.

Slumping against the door, you let yourself slide down to the ground, hugging your knees as they bunched up against your chest. 

You didn’t know what you would ever do if he found out. About the thoughts, about the self-hatred…

Heck, let alone the self-harm.

Seonghwa was the twinkling star in your life, lighting up any room he entered, constantly finding ways to make you crack a smile from absolutely nothing. He was too precious for this world, you were sure of it.

Which is why, on this otherwise fine and calm evening, you found yourself yet again questioning why in the hell he put up with you as much as he did.

What if you were just fooling yourself? What if this persona you felt from your very core was nothing more than an act, masquerading from the demon that had hidden inside you from years long past?

A silent cry threatened to surface. You took a sharp breath and reached in your pocket, fumbling around until you felt what you had been looking for: a rusted metal nail file.

The lump in your throat made you feel guiltier. It’d been mere days since you’d promised yourself that this wasn’t going to be an option…

Again.

But though time could heal wounds, it could only erase so many still embedded within your subconscious, still playing like a broken record during your moments of uncertainty and vulnerability.

“Do you ever shut up?! I swear, one more word and I’ll rip your tongue off!”

You bit your lip harder, genuinely wanting to taste the pain. What did it matter anymore?

“Sure, keep doing that shit. So we can all feel sorry for you and tiptoe around your stupid feelings? I don’t think so!”

You gasped with every memory, tears blinding and blurring your bearings, the file now slashing oh-so elegantly through your flesh like a knife through butter. 

“Slam your door again and I’ll make sure your head is the next thing that slams against the wall!”

You almost didn’t notice the crimson streaming down your arm, or the way it cascaded onto your other hand, dyeing the creases of your palm in a heartbeat, while numbness continued feeding your indifference.

Maybe there is no purpose to my life. Maybe I’m just meant to be a casualty and —

“Y/n?” You jolted, the three knocks on the door vibrating through your skull.

But you said nothing, afraid even a single syllable would give away your current state of mind.

“Y/n?” Seonghwa repeated, the worry carrying in his voice.

Panic kicked in and you started hyperventilating. Much to your chagrin, however, that only alerted him more.

“Okay, I-I’m coming in.” You heard the twists and click of the knob — darn it, I forgot he has keys for the place — and hastily shuffled over to the adjacent wall as he squeezed his way into the bathroom. 

A sharp gasp hushed within the small room. His eyes widened in shock as he took in the scene before him: the rusted nail file still in your hand, the blood-stained arm, the haunted look on your face — it broke your heart, to have him see you like this.

What you didn’t realize, though, was just how much his heart was breaking.

“Hwa, I…I’m sorry.” You hugged yourself tighter, wanting nothing more than to be a turtle hidden inside its shell. 

“Y/n…what happened?” His voice was laced with worry as he carefully approached you.

You tried to conceal the evidence, quickly slipping the file back into your pocket and attempting to wipe away the blood with the hem of your sleeve. But the damage had already been done. “I…I just had a little accident, is all. N-no big deal,” you stammered, furrowing your eyebrows as you looked away. 

He crouched down in front of you, gently lifting your chin to meet his eyes. “Y/n, don’t lie to me. What’s going on?”

A lump formed in your throat, and for a moment, you debated whether to spill your darkest secrets or to continue this facade. But when you saw the hurt in his eyes, you knew what your answer must be.

“I…I’ve been struggling, Hwa. There’s this darkness inside of me that just won’t go away,” you whispered finally, trying not to cry mid-sentence.

His expression softened, and he pulled you into an embrace. “You don’t have to face it alone, Y/n. I’m right here for you, always.”

The warmth of his hug felt like a lifeline, a tether grounding you in this moment of many that felt overwhelmingly chaotic. Tears streamed down your face as you clung to him tightly, slowly but surely releasing the weight that you had been carrying alone for far too long.

Seonghwa pulled away slowly, his hands holding yours gently. “Let’s get you cleaned up, okay? And then we can talk about this, together.”

You nodded, rubbing your thumbs against his in return. “Okay.”

He helped you to a standing position, and from there you both walked over to the medicine cabinet: you leaning slightly on the sink countertop, him removing a roll of gauze, bandages, and a few creams. Grabbing a nearby cloth to run it under warm water, you inhaled nervously. As he began tending to the wounds on your arm, still streaked in raw red, you hesitated, grappling with the storm of emotions brewing deep down. The bathroom felt like a fragile sanctuary, and you were on the verge of shattering its peace with the weight of your confessions.

“Hwa,” you began hesitantly, “I’ve…heard things. About myself. Terrible things that echo in my mind every day.”

He looked up at you, eyes brimming with a warm understanding. “It’s okay. Tell me as much or as little as you need to.”

With a shaky breath, you started to unravel the web of painful words that had been haunting you, from the cruel insults and relentless belittlement at home to the internalized hatred that had since taken root in your heart.

“I’m a failure. That’s what she says. My own blood mother.” You shuddered. “That I’m a disappointment, a burden…that her life would have been better if not for the presence of such an ungrateful bitch like me…t-that I ruin everything around me.” Your voice wavered as you stopped to catch a breath.

Seonghwa’s expression tightened with anger. “Y/n, believe me when I say you are none, and I mean absolutely none, of those things. You are strong, kind, and worthy of love. Don’t believe those lies. Please.”

You just shook your head. “I can’t accept your kind pity, though, Hwa.” Tears welled and clouded your vision as you continued. “She said I should be grateful that anyone tolerates me at all, that I’m lucky to have friends because I don’t deserve them…that I’m not good enough for anyone out there.”

His eyes softened with empathy. “Y/n, you’re more than good enough. You’re fucking incredible, and I…I care about you deeply.”

Your eyes widened at his choice of words, confusion and hope written all over your face. “Why, Hwa? Why would you care about someone like me?”

He sighed, setting aside the cloth, and cupped your face with his hands. “Because you’re not just someone, Y/n. You’re a remarkable person. Your strength, your kindness — it shines through even in your darkest moments. And…” He chuckled slightly. “I like you. More than just as a friend.”

A gasp caught in your throat, and time became still within the room as his confession hung in the air. Seonghwa’s eyes searched yours for a response, but you remained silent, the weight of his words sinking in. 

A spark of worry flickered across his face. “I-I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said —”

You placed a gentle hand on his cheek. “No, Hwa. I’m honestly really glad you did. I just…I need a moment to process everything. It’s a lot, but I really appreciate your courage to tell me that.”

His shoulders relaxed, a relieved smile breaking through. “I understand. Take all the time you need.”

He resumed cleaning your cuts, all the while as you couldn’t shake the startling but exciting realization that maybe, just maybe, someone as wonderful as Hwa could see past these insecurities, could see you for you.

An almost eerie silence hung between you two, broken only by the sound of running water as you rinsed off spots of leftover blood. Hwa glanced at you, debating whether or not to break the ice.

“To be honest,” you admitted in a voice barely above a whisper, “I don’t know if I’ve ever felt good enough for someone like you.”

He scoffed lightly, covering your hand with his. “Y/n, you’re more than enough. You’re perfect just the way you are.” 

His words lingered in the air, a poignant moment of vulnerability shared in the dimly lit bathroom.

And then something shifted.

With a playful smirk, you couldn’t help but bring up your insecurities, caught in a suddenly desperate vying to test the waters and see how he would take it. “Come on, don’t be silly, Hwa. I mean, look at me!” You raised an eyebrow at him, the hint of a smile teasing at your lips.

He took the bait. “Okay, and? What about it?”

Now it was your turn to scoff. “You gotta be kidding. I mean, for starters, I’m not even skinny, my face is rounder than the boba in that milk tea you were swirling around the other day” — he broke into a fit of laughter at this, prompting you to punch him gently on the arm (“Hwa, I’m being serious!”) before resuming your, he thought, rather dramatic speech — “and my body is far from what’s considered attractive these days.” You sighed, clenching and unclenching your fists before inspecting yourself through the bathroom mirror. “Especially with these…” You gestured vaguely to your rounded backside and thick thighs.

Hwa’s low, throaty chuckle reverberated in the bathroom, his eyes never leaving yours. “Y/n, you really think any of that matters to me?” He shook his head, his gaze intense. “You’re focusing on things that turn me on more than you could possibly know.”

To say you were surprised — curious, even — was an understatement. “W-what do you mean?” you dared to ask.

He leaned in, his lips dangerously close to your ear. “Your curves, the roundness of your face, that body you seem to underestimate so much — they’re all things I fantasize about more when I’m around you.” His words sent a thrill down your spine, and you felt a warmth pooling in the pit of your stomach.

“But why?” you managed to stutter out, genuinely baffled.

Hwa pulled back slightly, his eyes scanning you up and down. “Because, Y/n, it’s those very things that make you uniquely you. There’s…an allure throughout, if I’m being honest…and your body is nothing short of perfection in my eyes.”

He paused, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “And let me tell you,” he continued, snaking his fingers across one of your thighs, massaging it with his thumb, “these parts of you aren’t just attractive. They’re downright irresistible.”

Your breath caught in your throat, desire rushing through your veins as he leaned in again, his fingers tracing patterns that left your skin tingling. “I think about you in ways that would make you blush,” he admitted, his voice a low murmur. “You’re beautiful, Y/n. In every way imaginable.”

With that, he closed the distance between your lips, initiating a kiss that held the weight of his confession. The bathroom seemed to vanish into the distance as Hwa’s lips kept meeting yours in a slow, tantalizing dance, each kiss a revelation of shared desire. His hands, warm and possessive, explored the curves of your body with a deliberate sensuality. Fingers traced the contours of your back, leaving a trail of trickling sensations in their wake. As the kiss deepened, his touch became more fervent, a silent promise of passion yet to unfold.

Your hands found their way into his soft, tousled hair, fingers threading through the strands as you pulled him closer. His tongue prodded your bottom lip playfully until you indulged him, allowing the sensation of his tongue to slide against and around yours, igniting a fervor that sent electrical currents through every nerve ending.

The room seemed to get hotter and hotter, but nothing could have curbed the chill in your spine by this point. Hwa’s touch was both gentle and confident, a melody of desire that crescendoed as his kisses lingered longer and he began sucking your tongue slowly, making you moan ever so softly into his mouth.

Your own hands mirrored his movements, traveling across the edges and ridges of his chest, feeling the rhythmic beat of his heart beneath your touch. The bathroom echoed with intertwined breaths and whispered promises.

As the intensity built, you couldn’t help but straddle his lap, your bodies pressing together with an urgency that mirrored the passion between you. Hwa’s lips trailed from your mouth to your neck, leaving a trail of heated kisses. Moans continued escaping your lips as you felt his teeth grazing gently down the side of your neck. You clung to him, lost in the intoxication of the moment.

Your heartbeats all but synchronized as his lips found their way to your collarbone, his whispers of passion mingling with your soft gasps. He pulled back slightly, eyes looking deep into yours.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, his voice a velvet caress that sent shivers down your spine. He leaned in to place gentle kisses on your earlobe, his breath sending a flutter of anticipation through you. “I want you to feel cherished, desired, and free from any doubt about your body,” he whispered finally, his tone laced with sensual liberation.

His hands, like flames against your skin, caressed the small of your back. The room was filled with the harmony of your shared desire, moans and breaths alike embellishing the melody sounding strong.

As sweat dripped down your foreheads, the intensity reached its peak, and with a shared understanding, you both began to ease out of the fervent exchange. Hwa’s lips lingered on yours for a moment, a final note in the passionate composition.

His arms wrapped around you, nestling you within the sweet scent of his aroma, heaving heavily, slowly, as you both took a moment to catch your breath. You could spot the glimpse of a tender smile dancing on his lips. “See, Y/n, you talk too much,” he teased, his eyes alight with affection.

You chuckled finally, feeling a warmth enveloping you. “Maybe I do,” you agreed, “but I think I like it that way.”

Hwa’s eyes sparkled with mischief as he smirked at you playfully. “Well, you better, because I enjoy every word,” he smiled, leaning in to peck you briefly on the lips.

As you both settled into a cuddle, an air of contentment permeated within your space. Hwa’s fingers traced soothing patterns on your back as he spoke. “You know…I think we should have a date tomorrow. I want to take you out. Just the two of us.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the idea. “A date, huh? Where are we going?”

Hwa’s playful grin widened. “Somewhere nice, but you better promise me you won’t just order a small appetizer. I want you to enjoy the food, Y/n.”

You laughed, rolling your eyes. “Alright, alright. No small appetizers. Got it. But you’ll have to deal with me talking your ear off about how delicious everything is.”

Hwa leaned in, stealing another quick kiss. “I can’t wait. And besides, I enjoy every word, remember?”

The banter continued as you both playfully argued about your plans. Hwa grinned mischievously, glad that you were cutting loose for a change and genuinely enjoying yourself now. “And promise me, no salads as the main course. We’re going for the good stuff if this is a date.”

You raised an eyebrow, feigning offense. “Excuse me? Salads are healthy and delicious.”

He chuckled. “Healthy? Yes. Delicious? Debatable. We’re going for flavor explosions, Y/n, not the world’s best landscape on a plate.”

You countered with a smirk. “Okay, first of all, tabbouleh is to die for. And maybe I like my explosions with a side of greens.”

Hwa pretended to gasp, placing a hand over his heart dramatically. “You’re breaking my heart. And here I thought we had a connection.”

You burst into laughter, eyes watering within seconds. “Oh, we have a connection, alright, but my connection with tasty salads might just outdo it this time.”

He pouted. “Fine, have it your way. But if that’s how it’s gonna be, I’m ordering the biggest, heartiest dish on the menu just to torture you.”

You grinned. “Challenge dutifully accepted. I’ll enjoy my dish while you tackle your food mountain. We’ll see who’s satisfied in the end.”

Hwa leaned in, whispering. “Well, just so you know, if you end up trying a bite of mine, you might never go back to salads again.”

You smirked at him. “We’ll see about that. You can’t deprive me of my greens forever, you know.” You pretended to think hard for a moment. “I know, I’ll revolt! I’ll revolt and you won’t know what’s coming to —”

He pressed his lips against yours in a sudden, actually sweet kiss. When he finally pulled back, he was grinning slyly from ear to ear.

“You were saying?” he teased.

You snorted. “Well, I was going to say that no matter how tempting your ‘food mountain’ may be, my love for salads will endure. Just like my love for you, even if you try to sabotage it with impeccably irresistible dishes.”

He tried and failed to suppress another laugh. “You talk too much.” You grinned in satisfaction.

“Maybe I do, but you love it.”

[operator-report]

do you have any ideas about the undersiders music tastes. your other posts are so beautiful and true

aaah i'm so glad you liked my silly music posts! after some thought this is what i've landed on for the undersiders: taylor: in my heart taylor's mom did this to her, which is why taylor has a better-than-average teen girl knowledge of blondie, neil young, and the police. i think taylor's taste is a mix of dad rock and alt-pop rock hits. she likes the strokes and arctic monkeys. maybe a little mgmt. after her mom dies she stops listening to music that reminds her of her mom, so much less 70s/80s rock, but i don't think she switches to sadder music or anything like that, i think her taste just skews more contemporary after that. after the bullying started she tried out heavy metal really early on because she figured angry music might help her vent but it wasn't her thing. taylor does not listen to radiohead but she's the undersider who would like it the best i think. karma police is a taylor song send tweet

brian: there's a post out there somewhere that talks about brian listening to imagine dragons and that is SO real to me. he listens to imagine dragons. he listens to "tough" guy music that sounds like it could be in car commercials. he also listens to dudes rock music he hears at the gym. brian and taylor both like to match their music to their workouts and they have an immensely geeky conversation about matching bpm at one point. taylor matches it to her running brian matches it to boxing they are in nerd-jock heaven

lisa: she's a tricky one, because the music industry is one that both values authenticity and yet is extremely manufactured. i think that means that lisa finds music in which rich musicians make music about how hard their life is immensely grating. i think sarah livsey's taste was influenced by her brother, and much like how taylor does not listen to music that reminds her of her mom, lisa does not listen to music that sarah used to like. another smugbug yuri of absence moment if you ask me. anyway all that means that lisa listens to three kinds of music: downtempo instrumental electronic, classical, and We Are Up Partying In The Club Tonight Ooh Girl Oh Yeah. i think she finds, e.g., pitbull and eurotrance endearing. if you ask lisa what her favorite kind of music is she'll say something obnoxious like IDM or some shit just to see what the reaction is

rachel: i looked up "do dogs listen to music" and google says they will listen to classical sometimes, so! there you go. if worm took place a little later i think taylor could have introduced limited doses of lofi hip hop study beats to rachel and she would be ok with that too but also like. why listen to music when she could be outside listening to her dogs

aisha: the undersider with the best taste! we know that early worm aisha is a bona fide scene teen, and i think she consequently likes blink-182, pierce the veil, 3oh!3, cobra starship, and maybe a little bring me the horizon. in later worm aisha's taste gets less pop, like deftones, odd future, etc. she's a supervillain who would actually listen to madvillainy. aisha is also probably the only undersider who actively seeks to cultivate her own music taste! a good chunk of the undersiders have trauma that separate them from their interests and/or feelings, but aisha is an undersider who i think is both self aware and also true to herself, as well as being genuinely interested in art!

alec: speaking of undersiders who have a difficult time developing a defined music taste due to being cut off from a strong sense of self. alec in early worm is too depressed/apathetic to seek out music for himself, he'd rather be playing video games or watching movies. which is a shame because disassociating to music is one of the depressed activities of all time! alas alec's vision of a person with Taste is like. cherie. rip. however, aisha completely turns his life around into a guy who likes...................... soulja boy

there you go! tried to keep this period typical and also didn't include bands we know for sure didn't exist on earth bet (such as mcr). however i am very sad aisha and alec didn't get to listen to 100 gecs together. can you imagine. i can imagine and that's why i have a beautiful aishalec amv set to doritos and fritos in my mind

[csolarstorm]

Agatha All Along Ep. 5 First Impressions

I'm kinda disappointed.

Agatha All Along has been working really well as a solo project. The practical effects and episodic writing make it feel really different than a lot of the MCU. There are a lot of non-MCU fans watching this. So I was worried that

...Teen's identity just doesn't flow with not just the plot of this show, but its emotional core. What does "Teen is actually Wanda's kid" mean to the story of Agatha's coven and their journey down the Witch's Road?

What I was hoping was that after the Witch's Road, they'd take some time to bring Wanda's legacy back into the show organically so Teen's identity had some emotional weight to it. After all, there's a lot of potential for drama there once Agatha realized her "familiar" was the child of the woman who took her freedom for three years.

So when Wanda's crown appeared on Teen's head, I didn't have much of an emotional reaction to the reveal itself. It was certainly a cool way to do it, especially with the perfect song, but it happened too soon, too fast. I am definitely interested in how Agatha immediately turned Teen's words against him and projected Wanda's misdeeds onto him, especially since he immediately proved her right by taking control of Lilia and Jen and threw them all into the muck. I'm just a little confused as to why he would do that. Guess we have to wait and see.

The episode in general just felt...rushed, maybe? I don't know, I felt like bits of motivation or bits of reasoning were missing here and there. Everyone turned against Agatha during her trial really quickly, and they should know that past trials were supposed to be group efforts. Evanora kept repeating that Agatha was evil, she was born evil, but never offered any details about what she did. And nobody asked.

And then out of nowhere in the last minute of the "trial", Teen suddenly contacted Nicholas Scratch on the Ouija Board (didn't he say specifically it needed more than one person??) and a ghost's voice that I guess is Scratch pleads for Agatha to stop killing Alice, because he wants his mom to be a good person. Okay...? Then Nicholas Scratch was apparently a child when he either died or was sacrificed.

Why was that the way to finish the trial? What exactly was this trial? If last week's trial was anything to go by, you'd expect the coven to learn something, or find closure somehow. The fact that Teen randomly contacts a whole different ghost and apparently finishes the trial for all of them because the coven is in complete chaos and did NOT reach any understanding with Evanora - if that was the point of the trial - ? - kind of goes against the spirit of what we've seen so far. Maybe the writing was over-edited and messed up because Marvel had to oversee the Billy reveal.

This episode might still grow on me. That's why I'm calling this "first impressions". Because I literally just watched it, and I'm still digesting it. Stuff like Nicholas Scratch's appearance as a ghostly voice and Teen's reveal as Billy might make more sense with future episodes, so I'm not saying it's ruined or anything. Overall Agatha All Along is one of the best Marvel shows, exceeding it's predecessor Wandavision in emotional intelligence and drama.

Also at some point one of the witches called Billy Agatha's "familiar" and I just realized that's why she kept calling him her "pet". Though, considering she called her actual familiar "Senor Scratchy" and she thought Billy was her son for a while, that makes it a lot sadder. And I do like that Agatha only needed to know that he wasn't her son to suspect that he was Billy Kaplan. (Billy Maximoff? Billyvision? Whatever Marvel goes with.) But what really confirmed it for her was when he got righteous with her, and it reminded her of Wanda trying to excuse her actions in Westview. That was good.