#this song has me fucked up
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I also did this one today as some vent art. Lyrics are from Milk Carton by Madilyn Mei go listen to it
#Madilyn Mei#this song has me fucked up#been listening to it on repeat for like. mo ths#pixel art#my art#whispers in the trees#artists on tumblr#thats how ppl tag things right. i am doing my best#ive been on this website for like a decade but ive not been an artist on this website#furry#yeah im a furry thesr are animals it tracks
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no thoughts head empty just i wish it was two weeks ago, in your room that night i wish i'd known. when you held me tight, wish i hadn't let go, and i wish it was two weeks ago. i wish we kissed when we first wanted and we didn't miss all the time we did. when we said goodbye, wish i hadn't let go, and i wish it was two weeks ago.
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I love you albums. I love you songs connected by similar themes. I love you listening to songs in a specific order picked by the artist. I love you reoccurring motifs throughout the same album. I love you album covers. I love you albums with extended editions. I love you songs that reference each other.
#guys i fucking love listening to albums fr#best thing CDs have done for me is forcing me to listen to albums in order#this post is about. so many albums and artists#bad suns#imagine dragons#Set It Off#bastille#FUCKING HELL BASTILLE#theyre albums are SO GOOD#guys seriously. give me the future + dreams of the past. go listen to it. its so fucking good#doom days also fuckin slaps man. my fav oart is the fact the first 3 songs merge together for me until i realise million pieces is playing.#<- and ofc it has another place on it#also Imagine Dragons‘ Mercury 1+2 OUGH#the tone shift as you go through the double album until it does a full circle#sometimes a good album can be made up of songs that are banger after banger#<- All This Bad Blood-bastille Night Visions-ID smoke+mirrors-id apocalypse whenever-bad suns elsewhere-sio etc#and sometimes a good album can be made of songs that tell a progressive story while referencing eachother to enhance meaning and connect wit#-with the artists lived experinces#<- give me the future + dreams of the past-bastille mercury act I+II-ID Duality-sio#Tree Man Posts#music
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May your hardened heart be woken By the soft and distant song Of all you left here unspoken All the shards we keep stepping on - Take this body home Take this body home Call the wind, and let her know Take this life outgrown Take this broken soul Call the stars, call them all And take it high, take it far, take it home
#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#bingqiu#sqq#lbh#scum villain#heard the song Take This Body Home by Rose Betts and it nearly took me out at the knees#it really really suits sqq's self-detonation in hua yue city right? i'm not the only one feeling this?#considered adding some literal shards for them to be stepping on - since sqq's sword explodes - but i couldn't quite make it work#anyway this has been playing like a music video in my head for the past couple days highly recommend listening to the song#if you haven't heard it before#can't get over the absolute dissonance between how sqq views this scene and how everyone else must feel about it#like to him he's just completing his plan - hopefully keeping lbh from destroying a city with energy imbalance and escaping The Plot#nbd! he and sqh have planned it all out it's FINE :) off he goes!#meanwhile everyone who loves him - including lbh who worked years to get back to him and is trying to work through a lot of grief#and resentment and doubt and longing and... - watches him DIE in FRONT OF THEM#just collapse while coughing up blood sword disintegrating energy completely consumed#like holy hell sqq could you traumatize the people around you any more???#no wonder lbh went a little bit crazy after that like my man was already not in a great place but what the fuck#lbh watches his shizun presumably sacrifice himself for him ONCE AGAIN like after he's finally Gotten Strong his shizun is STILL#coming to harm in an effort to make up for his shortcomings#my art#most of the time out here drawing what amounts to muppets and then sometimes i get the urge for this and just need to cover everyone in blo
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I am not immune to funny crackships.
+ Bonus
#*falsettos your chasitys*#this started out as a ‘aha yea they fucked once in highschool’ joke for me how did I end up here#it went from ‘Teddy: yea man it doesn’t count if your socks are on’ to queer teen situationship in the 90s angst with religious overtones#I would like to blame everyone who has made holybastard fanart/fanfics for converting me#I don’t see them as a long term relationship but more on an active affair between two old high school ‘friends’#I drew these while listening to The Last Dinner Party ans now I can’t stop thinking about holy bastard to some of their songs#‘picture me in bed- under your crucifix- under your long black hair- I’ll see you on Sunday’ are actual lyrics how can I not-#I just impor you to listen (there only 5 songs as of now) and do the same- ESPECIALLY SINNER ITS SUCH A MARK CODED SONG#who would have figured the queer ex religious person would be a sucker for queer relationships with religious themes#grace chasity#peter spankoffski#pete spankoffski#mark chasity#holy bastard#starkid#team starkid#starkid productions#starkid fanart#starkid animation#npmd#nerdy prudes must die#nerdy prudes must die fanart#npmd fanart#npmd starkid#hatchetfield#hatchetverse#hatchetfield universe#fanart#my art#my animation
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i have been unmedicated for the entirety of spring break and thus have had little interest in writing this down, but i have been thinking about this for the entire week (as well as a dpdc clone danny au that resulted in it becoming its entirely separate batman au that includes a teenage vigilante bruce wayne, an ocarina, and me entirely incapable of making a batman au without making bruce dirt poor but we're not talking about that) and so i've finally went 'fuck it' and forcibly grabbed my laptop. I will get this done in one sitting even if it kills me.
BUT. This is about neither clone^2 danny nor about who i am calling Ocarina Batman. This is about my Danyal Al Ghul Au and more SPECIFICALLY it's me thinking about his relationship with Sam and Tucker specifically.
Tucker and Sam? Adore this asshole (affectionate) with every fiber of their being. And it is very much a reciprocated feeling, but Danny's thoughts will not be delved into much other than he would kill for them.
Tucker? The only person currently capable of getting a deep, loud, belly laugh out of Danny. Sam can get him to smile and to laugh, but it's the kind that's a chuckle-under-the-breath. The quiet, looks-down-while-huffing laughter. Snorts once with laughter and then grins stupidly.
But Tucker? Tucker can crack a slew of stupid jokes and Danny will be incapacitated for the next five minutes because he's laughing so hard that he can't breath. He lands one well-timed pun or quip and Danny will be close to tears. His laughter is their favorite sound in the whole world.
Sam is lowkey jealous of this ability, and she's gotten a belly laugh out of Danny a few times. But alas, it is Tucker who wields this power and has gotten it the most times out of the two of them.
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They're also both physically affectionate with Danny as much as possible. It started roughly around when they were 12-ish, a year since they befriended Danny, and they noticed that he sought after touch but never seemed to initiate (and was in some ways repulsed by it). They started slowly being more touchy with him. Hooking a finger around his to lead him somewhere, tapping his wrist, looping arms. Little touches, grabs, etc, to get him used to it, and once he started doing it back they started increasing it.
It's gotten to a point where he will now just. Lay on them. Like a lizard sunbathing on a rock. Leaning on their backs when they're sitting in class before the bell rings, his chin on their heads. He'll talk about anything with his arms looped around their shoulders.
If they're sitting on a couch at either of their houses, he'll lay his legs on theirs. Him and Tucker will press their feet against the other's and try and push against them (newsflash: Danny always wins, Tucker claims its the ghost strength but Danny's been winning since before his accident)
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Naturally, both Sam and Tucker know where Danny keeps his weapons on his person, and are allowed to grab them off of him if they need it. His only requirement is that they don't lose his weapons if they take it and forget to return it immediately.
They both understand how big of a thing this is from Danny, and so they do their best to treat his weapons with a lot of respect and care because they know its his way of saying he trusts them.
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Sam and Tucker are so fond of Danny it's insane. Like fr. That's their goddamn best friend, and they are so protective of him. Emotionally, physically, you name it. They will tear the head off a grown man if they need to, Danny's had scars since he arrived in Amity Park and Sam and Tucker both are going to find the person who put them there and make them pay for it.
One time, Tucker overheard a bunch of upperclass girls speaking nastily about Danny and about the rumors surrounding him, calling him names like 'freak', 'monster', etc. Danny was with him and heard it, and seemingly appeared unbothered by it, even telling Tucker that he was used to such rumors.
Tucker was so furious that hacked into the school system later that night and tanked those girls grades. They were kicked out of their clubs and had to go to mandatory tutoring for the rest of the year. He made sure to leave some way of letting them know it was him who did it.
And Sam doesn't like using her money for things, doesn't like abusing that wealth. So instead, whenever her parents talk bad about Danny, she causes a media incident that has her parents scrambling to deal with. She does something wild, outrageous by her parents' standards.
She heard some boys on the basketball team making fun of Danny once, similar to those girls had. She kicks up a fuss about something eco-unfriendly at school and forcibly holds a protest on the same day of the big home basketball game, forcing them to cancel the event and reschedule to a visiting school.
She anonymously donates money so that there's new uniforms for the team but oops! Looks like she "forgot" to donate enough money for them to get uniforms for all the team members, and strangely enough those boys in particular didn't get them! Looks like they'll have to wait until more money gets donated for the basketball team to get their new, nice uniforms. The old ones look so ratty in comparison, right?
And since the football team gets most of the sport money, that might just take awhile. And if (and when) they kick up a fuss? oops! Off the basketball team you go, :) such unsportsman-like behavior is unfit for the team.
(The only good thing about how corrupt the school system is is that she can use it to her advantage too.)
The both of them know that Danny suspects them for the sudden misfortune falling on these people, but he doesn't call them out on it. He's kinder than he used to be, but not kind enough to vouch for people who speak badly of him. Sometimes, he might just congratulate them on not getting caught.
Because Danny is their wonderful, hurt friend with a "slightly" Blue and Orange Moral code, and enough scars that people have been calling him a criminal (and worse) since he arrived in Amity Park when he was ten. And they'll be damned if he gets hurt anymore.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#danyal al ghul#its kinda hard to get my thoughts in order bc i am ✨unmedicated✨ rn BUT#this is the gist of it#i could wax poetic about how much sam and tucker adore danny as their friend but alas. the wax is not waxing. it is stuck to the paper#and i am chipping it off with my nail and its getting stuck under it.#ocarina batman has been in my head since friday someone come sedate me. him and pit fighter batman too. who is ALSO a piss poor teenage#bruce wayne who instead of a vigilante and villains is a PIT FIGHTER. he fights blindfolded thats why he's called the bat#ocarina batman's Look is if you combined punk + assassins creed aesthetic together and then gave it an ocarina#the ocarina is because i thought it'd be cool if its how he and robin communicated across long distances bc they didnt have comms#because they are ✨poor✨ and live in a one room apartment in crime alley.#and also the mental image of him sitting on. rooftop ledge in the rain playing 'song of storms' from LoZ was too fantastic to ignore#like bro imagine hearing that as a criminal. you're off doing shady shit with your gang and in the distance you hear the faint and#haunting melody of an ocarina. two of them in a call and response duet. and its getting closer. and you cannot find where#siren type shit fr fr#look he has the assassins creed hood and a long ass coat that has spikes on the end that when flared out looks like the silhouette of a bat#on fucking GOD i am this 👌 close to finding an artist doing commissions to make this for me. i am frothing at the mouth#he is 17-19 years old with his little brother-son Robin. Logically Robin is Dick but in my heart of hearts the first Robin is Jason#and he has perfected the art of getting his older brother to play songs on the pan flute for him. long pitchy whine on his own ocarina#the familiar childlike 'pleeeaaaaaaase?' and he knows he's won when there is a 10s silence on the other end before his brother plays#a lullaby.#look up 'sailor moon - pan flute (relaxing) on youtube' and when there's the thumbnail of two green skinned aliens with long blue and pink#hair. click on it. THAT is the song Bruce plays.#hhhhhhhhhhh frothing at the mouth over this au sooo fucking badly
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1 of 3 of my megan studies. —> HISS music video🐍 <—
#bitches swear they g but the g must stand for goofy...#it’s a tough competition but this is my fave visual from HISS#BRINGIN UP WHO MIGHTVE FUCKED AND THE BOTTOM LINE IS THEY STILL WOULD!!!!!!!!!#EVERY CHANCE YOU GET??? BET YOUR WEAK ASS WONT ADDRESS ME !!!!#i also have one wip for COBRA and BOA#womp womp womp womp amirite????#ughhh im so excited for MEGAN#i have been listening to traumazine so much.#my fave song is probably ungrateful. which ALSO has really good visuals...... hrm#megan thee stallion#art#my art#music video#megan thee stallion fanart#hiss#hiss music video#cobra#boa#tina snow
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KAISHIN STANS WE EATING GOOD
#kaishin#kidco#kaitou kid#edogawa conan#dcmk#detective conan#YO DETCO STAFF I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE#I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT#WE WANT THE EXACT SAME THING SWEETIE CALL ME UP AND LET'S TALK GAY DETECTIVE AND THIEF CHASING EACH OTHER UNDER THE MOONLIGHT 😏#the way conan is reaching out in a desperate attenpt to catch kid and kid jumping just an arm's reach away but also having his right hand#near conan as if in a defensive stance but can also be seen as a protective motion just in case conan falls or does something reckless#JUST DEFINITIVE KAISHIN RELATIONSHIP IN ONE FRAME#THE WAY CONAN ONLY HAS HIS EYES ON KID AND NOTHING ELSE AS HE RECKLESSLY REACHES OUT FOR KID AAAAHHHHHHHHH#IM GONNA LOSE MY FUCKIGN MONG OVER ONE GODDAMN FRAME#brain: now imagine if that was shinichi and kaito#me: RAAAAHHHCJIFFJDKJCSKDNCKSNAKXJ FUCK#dc prattles#this is from the new ED song btw lol
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Blessing of the knitter/crocheter: may your hands never have cuts, bruising, sores, hangnails, or any other nuisance that would make your craft painful. May your hands and wrists never ache 🪷💛
#art#knitting#crochet#i just figured out that the reason i feel like my yarn is burning me is because i have a cut right where my yarn goes#AND it's on the knuckle. this is so fucked up....#hate and sadness on planet earth#and yet i have still crocheted my rows. i get knocked down but i get up again. you're never gonna keep me down#that cat meme of that song has stayed in my head since i first saw it. i think it's saved my life actually#also this blessing goes double if you have a disability especially of the hands 💛🪷💛
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the dj playing cha cha cha during a break in the finland-sweden ice hockey world championships game sure makes me feel things
#eurovision#finland#käärijä#I know the song has been on the playlist before esc#bc it's probably on the playlist of all the places that go for party vibes#but watching random hockey fans dance the dance in the bleachers makes me TT.TT#we could've had it all man#fuck sweden they better lose#the game is 1-1 at the moment and there's like 8 minutes left in the third period#finland has been dominating but they fucked up so sweden scored first#but finland managed to catch up#I am going to Cry if we lose ngl
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Valentino Rossi & Marc Márquez
[ happy (belated) 9 year anniversary to sepang 2015 aka the one weekend everything went wrong, everything changed and that still haunts motogp to this day <3 ]
history of man by maisie peters
#soo we were talkinh about possible rosquez narratives in sepang i heard?? *insert that bear picture* bonjour 😏#*technically* the anniversary was last weekend already on oct 25th…but the sepang weekend is now and the edit wasn‘t resdy sooo#:)))#‚i‘m sure there was heartbreak in the world of motogp‘…‘so valentino blamed marc‘….‘valentino started the war yet valentino hates marc‘….#yeah….yeahh#also vale‘s evil spirit entered ae and fucked with the audio and now the one part sounds like ‚his program is to make me lose..‘#which is basically what he said anyway but now the text is all fucked up!!!#get out of my computer evil vale spirit!!!!#also. if the texts don‘t exactly line up and you see any glitches. look past it bestie. please. i went through PAIN to render this#and tumblr fucked the quality left and right and center…why. why. ���#what if i just—☠️#anywhoooooo#btw. is is. is it normal to still get brainworms about them. just. asking for a friend. because. maybe that friend hears a song sooometimes#and is thinking is like ohmygod that‘s rosquez#and then she has the urge to make an edit on her fuckass old laptop with a crackef after effects that doesn‘t play audios n lags like crazy#and she will HATE the edit but then think fuck it we ball and hits post with zero regards for the people who will have to the see it#no yeah i should talk to her yeah i agree mhm#motogp#marc marquez#valentino rossi#rosquez#rosquez edit#s.edits
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jealousy really is the driving force of DamiTim as a ship. love that for them. love how Tim has the Robin mantle ripped away from him and he has to suffer the jealousy of watching Dick and Damian bond. how possessive over Dick Tim can be, to have him stolen by Dick.
even more so though, is the jealousy from Damian. how on earth do you cope when you finally get to be Robin, a role you've convinced is your birthright, and no one really likes you? every prefers the Robin who came before you? Dick regularly reminds you that he can always go and call Tim back when you act out? like the complex Damian has over Tim is unreal. Tim, who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and had everything handed to him his whole life. he never had to struggle or fight for his place like Damian did. Damian has spent his whole life fighting and proving himself, and yet he can't ever seem to truly claw the mantle of Robin away from Tim. even when Tim lets it go, becomes Red Robin, they seem to share it. Tim can slip back into the role of Robin whenever someone like Dick or Bruce need him to, because *he's* the Robin who they need. he's the Robin who was able to find Bruce. he's the Robin that Ra's wants an heir out of. he's the Robin who even Jason respects. in Damian's eyes, everything Damian has fought tooth and nail for, was handed to Tim.
so of course he's going to react to Tim with violence and aggression, especially after finding out Tim has contingency plans for him. no matter how much Damian proves himself, he's never going to be enough, especially not to Tim. and so his deep refusal to see Tim as family, to acknowledge Tim's legacy is all driven by such an angry jealousy. Tim understands aspects of Bruce's legacy that Damian doesn't, like the need to sweet talk and play nice with the elites of Gotham, even if they're corrupt. they exemplify different aspects of Robin, and the aspects that Tim exemplifies are the aspects that Damian knows he'll never fully understand and therefore holds such a deep contempt for. he wants to fight criminals, not play nice with politicians. Tim understands the side of Gotham that's utterly foreign to Damian. if anything, he represents that side of Gotham, to Damian. a pretty little rich boy who's nothing but a know-it-all and not a real son of Bruce. he can't be a Wayne. he can't be Damian's family.
and all of that angry jealousy leading to unhealthy obsession turned a weird, angry crush from Damian is just my bread and butter. that is how DamiTim should be. to me. Damian obsessed over hating Tim Drake so much he accidentally ends up sort of in love with him and that only makes Damian angrier. because he can't prove everyone right by *also* liking Tim. he can't let Ra's win like that, because frankly why wouldn't Ra's be delighted by Damian and Tim getting together. and it builds and builds with angry passive aggression towards Tim that culminates in angry hate-fucking-that's-not-just-driven-by-hate. love and hate are always viewed as opposites in shipping and i think they're the same intense passion just in different directions. and for the best ships, they're very intertwined. what is DamiTim is not the peak of that. "i put so much of myself into hating you i had no choice but to fall in love with you somewhere along the way" core. love that bleeds into hate and hate that bleeds into love. "you make me so angry i regularly passively try to kill you but not with any real effort because who would i obsess over if you were actually gone" core. murder attempts as a form of courting. contingency plans to take each other out as a love language. they're unwell.
#necrotic festerings#damitim#timdami#tim drake x damian wayne#damian wayne x tim drake#also possibly a hint of dicktim at the beginning there#i have yelled at my partner about them nonstop#so i had to put the thoughts into a tumblr post to give them peace.#i clearly favor tim in my ships we don't need to talk about it#tim drake is so weird he makes everyone else weird about him by proxy.#like sir contain that aura it's making everyone mentally ill.#i'm not a hamilton girlie at all which is why it makes me so mad Wait For It is SUCH good song for damian#like that song just IS his complex over tim#whether canon or shipping#this pulls from a variety of canon btw#like yeah mostly pre-flashpoint#but i do think the fact that in current comics canon tim keeps defaulting back to being robin#must make damian SO mentally unwell#like oh that does not help your jealousy complex does it.#and the thoughts of tim understanding the elite in ways damian doesn't are inspired by the boy wonder (2024)#which GOD is the first modern comic to fucking understand how tim and damian actually feel about each other#in a way that isn't either cartoonishly evil or makes them make up too easily#ugh. juni ba your mind.#anyway the complex damian has over tim. is fucking wild.#bc like everyone uses it to woobify poor tim for being attacked by big mean damian#which first of all stop taking panels out of context#second of all#dude no WONDER damian has a complex. i'd hate tim's ass too!!!#when i was reading batman & robin (2009) and dick casually says he can still call tim when damian acts out#what kind of threat IS that dick. sir.
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obligatory pokemon au time!!
#milgram project#haruka sakurai#yuno kashiki#fuuta kajiyama#muu kusunoki#shidou kirisaki#mahiru shiina#kazui mukuhara#amane momose#mikoto kayano#kotoko yuzuriha#woah what the fuck u can do 30 images at once now#i didn't draw es with their singular eevee bc i thought the limit was 10 still whoops#anyways--#haru has a singular tiny budew that follows him around and loves him. he is afraid of it#yuno has a furfrou bc she loves big dogs. and liepard bc she's cat coded#i like to think fuuta makes really amateur lowpoly 3d renders so i think itd be fun if he had boys to make art w him#muu got herself a BIG HERACROSS when she was tiny and her mom was like. cringes. don't you want a girl pokemon for girls??#and baby muu was like SHE'S PINK!!!!! and would not let go of her buggy#a sableye approached her and tried to eat her earrings. the vivillon is from her dad#my friend pointed out shidou would be the exact age for playing gen I hence the squirtle#blissey bc nurse joy. his blissey used to carry around the gloom in her lil pouch when she was just an oddish#the eldegoss is his wife's!! but she tends to tumble about in the breeze and find shidou a lot#i actually started these drawings bc mahiru going OVERHEATTT in her t1 song made me think incineroar#she treats him like a big kitten!! and her phantump is her tiny baby#OK I CAN'T FIND W HO BUT SOMEONE DREW KAZUI WITH A SHINY APPLIN AND IT'S THE FUNNIEST FUCKING THING TO EXIST#he's got a lil bisharp that wants to be a kingambit but hasn't been able to evolve#and kazui is like. ah. action figure bug. for boys. cant live up to his manly potential. i relate deeply with this man#amane got an espurr bc she deserves a cute kitty. castform reminds me of her cult's cloud symbol thing#mikoto=morpeko connection has been made a billion times but it's true. he finds it eating his redbull cans at the office
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lukewarm take of the evening: y'all care too much about being ""outdated"". fellas this smp moves inhumanly fast. it is ok to CHILL holy shit CHILL. y'all are like "(posts BANGER ART) super late guys sorry" friend i am hitting you with a blanket i am snapping you with my metaphorical towel WHAT DO YOU MEAN SORRY. "(posts BANGER FIC) rip this is outdated now" WHO CARES???? I LOVE YOU, OK. ohhhh woe is us as the fandom at large for having MORE HAPPY PILLS ARC CONTENT oh no how outdated!! how could you be writing speculative fiction about how forever felt during happy pills :( slash SARCASM!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!! THERE ARE SO MANY BANGER ARCS, WHAT, YOU THINK WE'RE COMPLAINING????? FOR GETTING MORE OF THE CONTENT WE LOVED????? oh no we're past the period where everyone thought green gay ninjas were like Dead Dead, my work is now outdated and noncanon :( WDYM. GIMME. A BANGER IS A BANGER IDC IF IT TAKES THREE MONTHS. you think rome was built in a day?? fuck you, baltimore, GIMME. my ass has been cooking a goddamn backflipo family fic since july when it was ALREADY outdated do you think i fear god??? "oh no, you're making an edit of slime's (attempted) egg murdering spree?? how could you, that was months ago it's irrelevant" SAID NO ONE EVER.
save your wrists kidlings ok carpal tunnel is no joke. CHILL!!!!! CHILL!!!!!!!! TAKE YOUR TIME SHEEEEEESH OK LOVE YOU <3
#qsmp#shut up vic#block game brainrot#IT IS OK TO NOT ALWAYS POST SHIT THIRTY SECONDS AFTER IT HAPPENS!!!!!!!#for god's sake we have MONTHS of lore and bangers ok???#i still have a mental image of an art i wish i could make from BOBBY'S NIGHTMARE#HE HAS BEEN GONE FOR M O N T H S and you bet your ass if i can make it I WILL BE POSTING IT#SO. MUCH. SHIT. HAS. HAPPENED. who cares if it was months ago!!!!!!#it's ok to be a few days late!!! it's ok to be a few months late!!!!! don't tell me sorry for feeding me!!!!!!#part of me still lives in I'M NOT HOLDING A FUCKING FUNERAL CHAT#part of me still lives in maxo's final song for his son!!!!#part of me still lives in the day we thought ramón was gone for good#part of me still lives in cellbit sprinting to his son only to be ripped away back to the feds just as richas turns to write a sign#part of me still lives in the flooding of the copacabana ocean#THESE ARE BANGERS. REMEMBER WHEN FIT FOUND PAC E MIKE IN PRISON. BANGER.#oh dear new work expanding on a canon moment i super liked that happened months ago how late smh SAID NO ONE EVER#TWO CAKES!!!!! TWO CAKES MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!! WE LOVE PASTRIES DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT#COME ON Y'ALL. METAPHORICAL KISSES. LOVE YOU. HAVE A GOOD WEEK.#long tags
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gen loss dump part 2 :]
i have a gen loss playlist so the last two was me hitting randomize and drawing a pic based on the song before it finished. the second one technically isn’t that cause charlie’s inferno isn’t on apple music cause they hate me so it’s way more of the song out of spite because they wouldn’t give it to me.
#spotify is prolly better (definitely is for finding playlists i use spotify to find playlists still and then add those songs to my own lmao#but dad pays for a family apple music subscription and free music streaming is infinitely better then paying for my own spotify#also my wound reference i feel like i let him off easy from the seven foot tall wire security monster#but idk this was drawn a year ago idk what i was doing#like i agree w the vest just being REALLLL bad bruising and internal stuff but i feel like he had wayyyy more open area besides that to get#fucked up besides just his arms#but i guess since the wire monster also got turned off by the button since it didn’t immediately go at ranboo next then maybe that’s still#reasonable idk#generation loss#generation loss fanart#ranboo fanart#continuing my not spamming tags trend so even though i bc puls have tagged all three of them im not gonna#still posting this primarily for me and for everyone else second#OH THE OUTFITS ARE FROM MY PIN BOARDS#I MAKE OUTFIT BOARDS FOR EVERYTHING ITS SO FUN#LIKE EVERY FANDOM IVE POSTED HERE HAS ONE#ITS BAD#and then irl i wear sweats and t shirt lmao#i found mouse trap game board earrings#i spend too much time on those finding highly specific bullshit#the jrwi one is especially cringe cause i have a different section for all of the what ifs#and that shit lasted one (1) episode#also the full color drawing i’m so >:| about it#i need to practice coloring sooooo badly but i always get frustrated w it#i need to slow tf down idk#but thats also from nearly a year ago so
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Thinking about the Dawnfather. A god of light, a god of harvest, a god of the sun itself. Good but not nice, kind but not soft. Life-giving but also scorching. Protective, warm, and kind, but also stern, harsh, and abrasive. His light can foster growth, can protect and guide, but it can also scorch and burn. The sun is warm and nurturing but don’t stare at it too long, child, it’ll blind you.
Was he always so hard? Did he always hide his face with the harsh light of the sun? Or was there a time when he smiled and laughed, let others see him as he truly was?
Thinking about the Schism. Was the Dawnfather close to the Betrayer Gods before they turned? He must have been, Asmodeus wouldn’t be so hung up on him if he wasn’t. Speaking of Asmodeus, he was once a being of light, like the Dawnfather and the Everlight are now. Were they closer than the others? When the Gods came to Exandria, did they come from the same place or were they scattered, a ragtag group of survivors fleeing from predators seeking to devour them? And if the latter is true, did these three beings of light come from the same place? Siblings, born from the same stuff, forever tied to one another?
If this was the case, then, what was their relationship before the Schism? Did they call each other “Brother” and “Sister”? Did they hold each other when they were scared, dry each other’s tears, laugh and joke and tease and fight and make up because they were siblings and they’d always be together, and they loved each other with every fiber of their being and they only had each other. When Predathos came, when it devoured two of their newfound siblings, did the Dawnfather hold them both and promise them that everything was going to be okay because he was their brother and he was going to protect them, all of them. The gods, mortals, the world itself, they would not be devoured, they would not be destroyed, because he was there and would fight until his very last breath to keep them safe.
Wondering then, was that the moment when Asmodeus truly grew to hate their creations? Seeing his brother and sister and siblings risk their lives just to protect some mewling mortal wretches when they could just leave it all behind and start somewhere new. Was that the moment when he realized that mortals had done something to them, changed them when they were not supposed to change. Why else would they risk being devoured by Predathos, why else would they suffer through war with the Primordials? Why else would they choose them over him!? Was this the moment when he decided to conspire with the Primordials and the other Betrayer Gods? To destroy this world and the mortals on it so they could finally leave. And they would leave, of course, because the Dawnfather was his brother and the Everlight was his sister and the Gods were a family, and at the end of the day, they would always be together, and once the corrupting influence of those mortals was gone, they would surely all see reason.
And when the Dawnfather discovered this betrayal, when all the Prime Deities did, he must have been furious. How could they!? His kin, his brother, who had always been by his side through everything, how could they turn around and destroy their creations, their children. And so he and the other Primes took up arms and fought against their own family to protect this world they had created, and their children who inhabited it. Those battles must have been brutal, bonds of comradery broken, kin clashing against kin, screaming curses as they tore each other apart.
During those final battles of the Schism, when the Dawnfather clashed against Asmodeus, did they scream at each other in rage? A twisted reflection of previous squabbles, different because this time it was real, this time there is no forgiveness, no making up. When the Dawnfather knocked Asmodeus down, crushed his throat under his foot and banished him to the Hells, was he yelling when he disowned him? Or was he quiet when he did it, his voice going into a low growl, deadly calm as he told him that he was not his brother anymore. And moments previously, when the Dawnfather could have easily killed him, did he look into Asmodeus’s eyes and see his brother? Scared and hurt by his hands, hands that once held him and swore to protect him. In that moment, did the Dawnfather realize he couldn’t kill him? Because that was his brother and despite everything, he still loved him, and hurting him brought him more grief and pain than he could ever imagine. So instead, he banished him, locked him and all the other Betrayers away because he and the other Primes couldn’t bring themselves to kill their family, but they also couldn’t let them free.
Was this when the Dawnfather obscured his face? Hardened his heart because otherwise he would break, and he cannot break, because the other gods need him to be strong, because Exandria needs him to be strong. And so he stayed strong, despite the grief, despite the guilt, despite the pain of heartbreak, of hurting the ones he loved to protect the ones he loved. And this hardening must have continued, running himself ragged during Calamity, beating back Tharizdun, protecting Ioun after she almost died, sheltering the Everlight after Asmodeus once again betrayed her, stabbed her in the back and left her broken and weak when all she wanted was to do was get her brother back, to save him from his own wrath. Failure after failure after failure to protect those he cared about, to protect his siblings and mortals and Exandria itself. The guilt of his failures must be overwhelming, and these are his failures: Predathos devoured his siblings under his watch, his siblings betrayed them under his watch, Calamity ravaged Exandria under his watch, and even now, the threat of Predathos has once again returned under his watch.
No wonder he is so harsh now, so controlling now: because every time he has failed in his vigilance the world has suffered for it. He can’t fail again; he can’t lose any more siblings. And so, he continues hardening his heart, continues fighting, because the sun must always rise again in the morning, no matter what.
#did i make my first post a 1000+ word essay about the dawnfather? yes#did i write this instead of doing my work? also yes#would i do it again? absolutely#i have so many thoughts about the gods of exandria#i want to shake them in a jar and examine them under a microscope#it is my foremost belief that pelor has eldest daughter syndrome#like surface pressure from encanto is literally the perfect pelor song tell me im wrong#he is so stressed. all the time#like pelor IS a dick. absolutely#he has definitely done some fucked up shit#but he's not malicious or evil. hes doing what he thinks will protect everyone#he is in desperate need of a nap. a hug. and a therapist#this definitely delves into headcanon territory but i dont care#critical role#cr spoilers#cr meta#cr headcanons#dawnfather#everlight#cr asmodeus#pelor the dawnfather#cr sarenrae#cr gods#shelley's overdramatic character analysis
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