#this on was a struggle and still not great but I need to get the 2022 ones out of my drafts before the year is over haha

[kathleenkatmary]

Yes. All of this. And to piggy back off of it, I feel like one of the big ideas the show highlights, particularly in the second season, is the way that trauma and pain can isolate us (especially women), especially when we're made to feel that expressing our pain and seeking help would be an annoyance or a burden to others and/or like our pain is misplaced or wrong because the perspective of everyone else seems to be that what we're experiencing isn't that bad, or isn't even bad at all. And in that isolation not only do we do things that close ourselves of from getting help from others, but it makes closes us off from seeing the pain the people close to us are struggling through.

I feel like the show was pretty explicitly critical of the way our culture treats trauma and the pain that comes from it and the way that "socially acceptable" ways of trying to deal and cope inherently isolate us from being able to both seek/receive help from others and offer help to those who need it.

Alison resorting to plotting to murder Kevin from the beginning of the show really highlights this, IMO, because it's made clear - particularly throughout the first season - that she's been made to feel like there's nowhere else for her to turn. She's surrounded by people who think Kevin is the greatest. Even the other women around her prop up this idea. There's at least one point where Diane talks about how great Kevin is and how lucky Alison is. Since she's known her Patti has been, from Alison's perspective, 'just one of the boys' when it comes to her relationship with Kevin. So when Alison looks around, it seems like she's alone. There's nobody who sees what she's going through, and with the way things are she understandably doubts that anyone would take her seriously.

And even when she and Patti do team up and start to see each other differently, there's still a lot of friction between them that comes almost solely from them continuing to operate like they were when they were alone because even though they are working together, they don't really know how to reach out to each other and ask for an offer emotional support. The culture they exist in doesn't teach them how to do that. And for them I think that's true twice over, because they both clearly grew up in families where that was the case, and the community they live in is clearly one where that kind of thing isn't really common or encouraged. It's not a coincidence that their relationship started getting healthier and more functional the more they both realized that they actually weren't alone in the things that they'd gone through and learned to both accept and offer support.

Patti and Alison really do represent the two different sides of this problem. Alison is self absorbed, she uses people, especially Patti, she often doesn't recognize what other people are going through, and she takes whatever help Patti will give her and then some without offering much in return. Patti, on the other hand, is constantly offering herself, her help, her support to Alison, even when it's detrimental to her life and relationships, even when she's getting very little, if any, help and support in return... but for much of their relationship, she doesn't really ask for it. There are points here and there where she blows up and points out how uneven their relationship is in this regard, but she always lets it go after that.

Alison doesn't know how to offer help and support, and Patti doesn't know how to ask for it. And when you look at their stories, it makes sense why that's the case. Alison has spent so long being so isolated, not really having any friends, the closest relationship she seems to have is with Diane, and even that seems pretty shallow. She's been stuck with this abusive asshole who sucks up all the air in the room, all the money she makes, all the attention and love from everyone in their lives, and through that all she has to watch and listen as people fawn over how great he is. She's been so alone in it for so long, with no relationships of any real depth. She's so self-focused because she's had nobody else but herself for so long, and nobody to see what she's going through. So when someone does see it and offers some kind of help and support, it makes sense that she would just take and take and take. It's like she's been stuck in the desert for so long and she's finally stumbled upon someone who's offering her a bit of water.

And in turn, it makes sense that Patti would continue to just keep giving, to just keep letting Alison take and take and take. She's been taking care of her brother for so long, even when he's an adult and he doesn't really need it, even when she know he's manipulating her so that he doesn't have to take care of himself. She found herself in this position when she was young where she had to take care of her brother, without anyone there to really offer and tangible help or support. She didn't really have any friends or close relationships of her own. Her life revolved around taking care of Neal, so the only 'friendships' she had were the ones she had through him, and while those relationships were shallow and empty they were the only ones she had. And she had them by way of taking care of her brother. She felt like she didn't have anyone to go to for help and support with her pain because not only did she not have anyone close enough to her to feel safe doing that with, but the position she'd been in since she was young made her feel like she was the one who had to take care of other people, not the one who was taken care of.

Alison and Patti were two women who had been traumatized at least in part by these roles they kind of ended up forced into, these roles that are very much consider expected and accepted roles for women in society. And society can be nasty to women who chafe against those roles. Especially when the men who make those roles miserable for them are so beloved by the community. Which just makes the women experiencing those traumas isolate themselves even more, and that results in them not being able to reach out to each other. It's also not helped by just the general way society teaches women to look at and think about each other. Both Patti and Alison express some pretty unflattering and stereotypical assumptions and perceptions about the other, which are based on (1) those cultural ideas about women, (2) the roles the society/culture they lived in forced them into, and (3) the roles they ended up in and the image they projected as a result of their isolation.

That's the tragedy that I think the flashback where they meet at the bar is really hammering home. These two had existed in each other's orbits for a long time, so close but just out of reach because of the way the culture and community they lived in taught them to isolate themselves, to wall themselves up, to shut up and deal with it themselves. If they had just been able to reach out to each other sooner, to both offer and receive help and support from each other, their situations never would have reached the extremes they did. But because they were made to think that they had to go it alone, that there was nobody else who could see what they were going through, that they needed to just keep their mouths shut and not make a fuss, they ended up having to struggle through it all by themselves for so long when they really didn't need to.

I've always felt like one of the biggest messages the show was trying to put out there is that there's no such thing as a 'perfect victim', and that a big reason for that is because our culture's relationship with trauma and emotional pain inherently puts people who have experienced trauma in a position that fosters those 'imperfect' things that can make victims selfish and mean and reckless and self-centered and irrational. No matter how much you'll see people online or in the media talking about self-care and mental health support and getting help, when it comes to actual people experiencing actual trauma and its aftermaths in an actual community, our society and culture is still very much set up in a way that discourages people who have been abused and traumatized isolated and alone, and I think Kevin Can F**k Himself did a really amazing job at really laying bare that reality, exploring just how damaging those norms are, and showing how powerful finding someone who understands and learning how to both seek and offer help can be.

A thing I find really important about the way Kevin Can Fuck Himself goes about its job: Allison is kind of a mess. She’s self-centered, she doesn’t put other people’s needs first, she makes reckless choices that endanger herself and others. And the show says: yes. Right. She’s flawed as fuck. And she still does not deserve any of what’s happening to her. It could be argued that she is, in fact, this flawed as a direct product of her trauma. Her self-absorption, unlike Kevin’s, is actually self-preservation. It puts Patty in danger. It tunes out Diane’s pain. It capitalizes on Sam’s relationship problems. And still, the show says: yes. Right. She’s going about this in fumbling, worrying ways. And she still does not deserve any of what’s happening to her.

Know how we know this? How we really know this, outside of our own objectivity, our own awareness of the abuse she’s enduring even to the soundtrack of laughter?

Because Tammy is the one to find her. Because Tammy is the one holding the cards at the end of the game. Tammy, who does not like Allison. Who sees so clearly the complicated, messy, dangerous person Allison can be. The mistakes she is prone to making in the name of desperation. How imperfect she is at every level. And Tammy, who is the character most explicitly set to call Allison on all of her shit, to drag her before a court of law, to lean on that hot-button of whether or not she’s a “good person” until it breaks—lets her go. Folds the cards up, puts them in her pocket, and leaves.

Because Tammy, like the show, like the thesis statement of abuse is never earned, never deserved, never warranted, understands. This is a world that so often sanitizes women after it’s too late to save them. A world that insists she should have done more to get out. A world that insists you should be kind and moral and perfect, or maybe you got what was coming to you. This is a world that sees fighting back as an equally heinous crime. As punishable, if not more so, than the actions of the instigator.

But this show doesn’t want to play that game. This show doesn’t want to fuck with it at all. Allison doesn’t have to be perfect and moral and above reproach. Allison has blood on her hands, and a DUI neatly ignored, and knowingly has an affair with her married boss. Allison hurts her friends sometimes, and she makes awful decisions out of desperation, and she doesn’t always pay attention to other people’s plotlines. And the show says: yes. Right. She’s making choices you probably should not agree with.

And she still does not deserve any of what is happening to her.

[redrose10]

This was a request for fake dating with Jungkook and prompt #40 I think I have always been in love with you for @yoongznme. I hope you like it!

< Lemonade >

Warnings: Hints of body insecurities

#40 “I think, I have always been in love with you.”

*******************************************************

“I’m sorry what?”, you asked them to repeat themselves for the third time still not believing what you were hearing. When your boss asked to have a word with you about a promotion you thought it would include a few extra responsibilities and hopefully a much needed raise because being a makeup artist for an award winning kpop group did not really pay as well as you’d think.

You never expected to be told that you would be pretending to be Jungkook’s girlfriend though. It was some crazy plan that the company’s PR team came up with after he had recently gotten some bad press over something dumb and out of his control but at the end of the day it was still bad press effecting numbers which effected profit.

They thought that it would be a good idea to make it look like he was a loving, sweet, devoted boyfriend who could do no wrong. Somehow or another your name got thrown in the mix because you yourself were nice, polite, and you had this kind of the good girl next door thing that they were looking for.

You were nervous to say the least. Jungkook was attractive, no one would deny that. He was also always very kind and thoughtful when you interacted and you definitely had a small crush on him but you were a professional and knew not to let your emotions get in the way of your work plus there’s no way a global superstar would ever actually want to date a struggling makeup artist.

However you agreed, though you had the suspicion you really didn’t have a choice anyways if you wanted to stay employed, and they told you to be back at the building tomorrow night at 8pm.

So you did just that. You were in the dress one of the stylist left for you and you’d done your makeup and hair. Jungkook was styled perfectly as usual and he smelled so warm and comforting as he gave you a hug, “You look really nice Y/N.”

“Thank you.”, you whispered hoping he couldn’t see you blush.

The plan was to drive over to a very well known hotspot for dinner. Idols frequented the place constantly so there was also a stream of paparazzi and fans trying to catch a glimpse.

When you arrived the amount of people shocked you. As soon as Jungkook appeared there were earth shattering screams and so many flashes of light you couldn’t see a foot in front of you.

“Y/N, just stay close behind me.”, he said taking your hand and helping you out of the car while making sure to block the view of the cameras so you could get out comfortably in your dress.

Once you were in view the screams got even louder although maybe angrier. The camera flashes definitely increased though giving you a headache. The bodyguards began to push through the crowd with Jungkook close behind, his hand tightly gripping yours as you tried to keep up.

Inside, the restaurant was significantly calmer which you appreciated. Jungkook sipped on his beer while you stuck to a lemonade.

“I’m sorry the company is making you go through this.”, he said finally after a bout of silence.

“It’s okay. They’re paying me quite a bit so it’s worth it.”, you chuckled not noticing the slight grimace on his face.

The rest of the dinner went smoothly. Jungkook was a great guest and you relaxed enjoyed hearing about his travels and all the funny stories he had, especially the one about Yoongi tripping and falling face first into a cake that Namjoon had decided to leave sitting on the living room floor for some strange reason. He showed you a picture of Yoongi’s face covered in frosting and you couldn’t wait to tease him about it when you saw him next.

After dinner the crowd outside had died down a little bit was still enough that you had to put on an act. Jungkook pulled you close against him as he took you outside and right into the waiting vehicle where he continued to hold you against him even as the car sped off. It sent a wave of emotions through you so you made sure to create a little bit of space between you both just to remind yourself that none of this was real.

It looked like the plan was working perfectly because the next morning there were several headlines questioning who was the cute woman Jungkook was photographed with last night. The fans were also loosing their minds over it, posting over and over about speculations and rumors. You did your best to try and avoid most of them because while a good chunk were generally in favor of the relationship there were still many, mostly fans, that were not happy about Jungkook possibly being in a relationship. This resulted in you seeing some hurtful words about yourself m before deciding to log out of all of your social medias.

The next several weeks were filled with much of the same. Various stages photo ops took place so that fans and photographers could catch moments between you both. When the rumors finally started to become out of hand the company released an official statement confirming the relationship between Jungkook and you, a sweet, down to earth makeup artist that he had fallen madly in love with. The media and fans lost their minds.

You went into this whole thing thinking it would be easy. You were getting a big payday to basically hangout with Jungkook and let your photo get taken. You didn’t expect for your crush to grow into being full on in love with him but it was hard not to fall. He was so incredibly thoughtful and sweet. He was always ordering you lunch or bringing you a coffee even when the cameras weren’t around. When your cat needed an unexpected emergency surgery he paid for it in full after overhearing you cry to one of your friends about how you couldn’t afford it. He was always telling you how pretty you looked or complimenting your clothes with a slight hint of a blush on his cheeks. When you were visiting a friend and missed the last bus and you called him as a last resort hoping he could ask the company to send a car he drove over an hour at 2am to personally pick you up himself while staying on the phone with you the whole time so that you wouldn’t be scared.

After a few months of this it was getting harder and harder to remind yourself this wasn’t real.

Up until this point things were going great. Your relationship was doing exactly what the PR team had hoped. People pretty much completely forgot about his previous scandal and were focused on how he was a sweet and generous boyfriend. His image had never been better.

Then there was an incident. Jungkook was very protective always keeping you close to him. Even when the bodyguards reminded him that they were there for your protection as well he still insisted on personally seeing to your safety.

So one morning you were set to board a flight to New York. Of course the entrance to the air port was packed full of paparazzi and fans all screaming and trying to get photos and videos of you two. The airport had put up barriers but with the amount of people all pushing and shoving some of the barriers got knocked down allowing the crowd to surge in.

Security did their best to surround you guys and get you through the crowd but they were greatly outnumbered.

Thanks to the loud noises and flashing lights and amount of people surrounding you it all became too much and you began to panic. You held onto Jungkook, squeezing his hand that was interlocked with yours to try and ground yourself and remind yourself that you were okay.

“It’s okay Y/N. I’ve got you. We’ll get through this.”, he said trying to comfort you.

The crowd surged forward again. Thanks to your blurry vision and panic you aren’t sure exactly what happened but somehow you tripped ending up on the floor. You were trying to get up fast before you got trampled on but you kept getting pushed and shoved down until you felt someone grab your waist and pull you up. Instantly you recognized the familiar cologne and tucked your face into Jungkook’s shoulder as he quickly pulled you through the rest of the airport.

On the plane where it was quiet and safe you started full on crying. You felt so silly but you couldn’t hold it in any more.The fear and anxiety became too much.

Jungkook came over handing you a bottle of water and some ice for your bruised knee. He rubbed soothing circles on your back as the plane took off, “It’s okay Y/N. It’s okay. You’re safe now. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t protect you.”

“It’s not your fault. You did everything you could.”, you whispered starting to feel a little better.

After a while you managed to fall asleep and take a small nap. When you woke up Jungkook was still sitting next to you. He was staring intently at your face.

“Stop looking at me. I’m always so ugly when I wake up.”, you chuckled feeling much better than earlier.

“Impossible. You are never ugly Y/N.”, he whispered.

He was fidgeting with his shoe lace. Something you had picked up on being a nervous habit of his.

“Hey Kook, is there something on your mind?”, you asked.

He waited a moment before nodding, “When we get back from New York I’m going to tell the company that we need to end this fake dating thing. I can’t do it any more.”

You felt like you wanted to cry again but you swallowed it down because maybe he thought you were too weak or why would he want to be with the girl who tripped an embarrassed herself and himself, “O-Okay. It’s up to you.”

“I just…I’m so selfish”, he chuckled, “I’m not going to keep putting you in danger though. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you Y/N, especially if it was my fault. What happened back at the airport…that was a wake up call. I’m sorry I ever suggested this.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion., “What do you mean you suggested this?” You were under the impression this was all the companys PR team but now it seems like he had a part of it.

His cheeks turned a bright red before he ran a hand through his already messy hair, “Well I guess I might as well come clean now.”, he turned his body to look at you fully, “Y/N when the company suggested this fake dating thing I was against it at first. But then…then I thought maybe I could use it as an excuse to spend more time with you. I’ve always thought you were really cute and sweet and kind and I had a bit of a crush on you. So I convinced them to get you to be the woman I fake dated. I was too shy to ask you to hang out so I thought it was a way to spend time with you and get to know you better.”, he made eye contact with you for a brief moment and you could see the fear in them. He continued, “I think I have always been in love with you. I love you more and more every day.”, your heart was practically beating out of your chest at his confession. You tried to stop him but he continued, “And that’s why we have to end this. I don’t want you getting hurt because of me. You don’t deserve this.”

He looked as if he was about to cry and it made you want to just cuddle him and make everything go away. Instead you chose to grab his hand and hold it on your lap, “Jungkook I love you too. I have for quite a while. Honestly, I didn’t think you would ever see me like that so I thought this was all your company’s idea.”, his shoulders seemed to relax a little at your words so you went on, “I know that dating you comes with lots of hardships but I think the positives greatly outweigh those negatives and I don’t mind going through them. If…if you want to I would like to continue to date you, but maybe actually date and not fake date anymore.”, you chuckled.

That got a big smile out of him too which warmed your heart. “I would love to keep dating you Y/N.”, he nodded. You cuddled in closer to him spending the rest of the flight talking and laughing and enjoying each other’s presence.

When the plane landed he had already arranged for a car to pick you up straight from the tarmac so that you wouldn’t have to endure the stress of walking through the airport with him again.

When he finally made it out front and jumped into the car he smiled at seeing your face, “I missed you Y/N.”, he then leaned in and kissed you like it was nothing new. “You already got into the lemonade didn’t you.”, he chuckled after tasting it on your lips.

“Kook we were only separated for like ten minutes and of course I did. You know lemonade is my favorite.”, you giggled.

He leaned over and rested his head on your shoulder, “Doesn’t matter. It was ten minutes too long.”

You gave the top of his head a kiss as the car sped off to your new destination.

[loulovingho]

I've been thinking about the breakup scene again and while I hate the biphobic language I do understand why Tommy said what he said.

Bucks speech to Tommy isn't actually about Tommy and the future he wants with him. We know as the audience that Buck wants a future with Tommy but what hes actually expressing to him isn't that. He tells Tommy that he makes him comfortable because Tommy's so comfortable and when Tommy interjects and says he wasn't always like that Buck kind of ignore it and goes on about how he admires him as an elder Gay and the struggles he has to go through and we see this look on Tommy face, this sad resigned look, like he in this moment is thinking Buck isn't seeing him for who he actually is but who Buck thinks he is. So when Buck ask him to move in he knows he can't.

When Tommy tells Buck I'm your first not you last its because Tommy thinks Buck is still caught up in the euphoria of dating a man for the first time, Tommy feels like Buck doesn't actually see Tommy for who he really is, that Buck has him on this pedestal, and and if they moved in with each other right now Tommy is so scared that when the shine wears off, when the pedestal break and Buck see Tommy for the person he is Buck won't love him. In this moment Tommy doesn't feel seen he and hes sad and scared and he'd rather break his own heart in this moment than let Buck break it later on.

I don’t disagree with you here! And if the interviews after the episode would have focused on Buck’s impulsivity and his need to get Tommy off that pedestal, I’d feel in a much better place. But they left Tommy in the dust, and that’s not fair after making us care about him. This would actually be a pretty great storyline if they hadn’t ruined it immediately after to say Tommy is done. Also, some of the biphobic language I speak of is directed toward Maddie asking how many men Abby made gay.

Anyway, I do agree with you!

[bengiyo]

Ben’s Big BL Blurb 2: Fall is Finally Here

I am simply too busy with worth, family, other hobbies, and life to write about every show in real time anymore. I’m sorry to all the Stray Thoughts readers who’ve reached out about whether I would pick that back up, and I simply just do not have the time to do them anymore. Instead, I’ll try to do one of these as often as I can to catch up on things.

First, let’s go over some shows I finished recently that I don’t think I wrote much about.

First Note of Love

I was so happy to see Michael back on screen, and I was glad to see that he’s still able to get great chemistry with his co-star. Unfortunately, I don’t think this show was very coherent, so I didn’t get a lot out of it emotionally. It was a pretty inoffensive watch overall, and thus an easy show to put on without having to work through too much. I liked the work between everyone, and Mei Lei was such a fun character. Probably won’t return to this one, though. 

Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo

This is probably the show of the year for me. There’s so much I loved about this show. I loved that the characters had sex, but were neither rewarded nor punished for it; their sex didn’t solve any problems. I also really love how this show explored how childhood trauma expresses in two different kinds of boys, and I love that we got to see a bully reckon with his actions and get closure. I love that this show ended with them being kinda poor, but happy together. I love how messed up they both were about everything. I loved that Juyeong wasn’t stupid, and could read what was going on.

I clearly need to write a separate post to unpack everything I felt in this show.

Let’s move on to what I’m watching currently, in no particular order…starting with the lesbians, and then the worst BLs.

Apple My Love

Genuinely having fun with this GL. I like how quickly most of the drama plays out. It’s giving me quite a bit of secondhand embarrassment, but I like the characterizations in this show. This new production house brought us Knock Knock, Boys! and Monster Next Door this year. We need to keep an eyes on them. 

Haunted Hearts

I’m so fascinated by Oxin Films teaming up with Regal Entertainment. The leads are very attractive, but the cinematography is really boring. I’m trying to stay invested, but it’s kind of a sleepy watch. Also amused that they started airing a ghost romance right after Halloween ended. I’ve kind of moved on emotionally from the season.

My Damn Business

This show could be good, but it’s not. I struggled with episode 5 because our lead looked more relaxed and happier with his senior than the guy he’s getting into a romance with. There’s something missing here in this one, but I can’t exactly put my finger on it. I think it’s primarily a side effect of the short run time, but I think the boss’s interest isn’t landing properly for the employee to respond to. 

Eccentric Romance

This show could be good, but it’s not. Still, I am obsessed with a murder mystery being the primary source of confusion between our leads. I was willing to forgive this show a lot of its rough edges, but it failed to handle the turn from friendship to sexual/romance really well. I feel like our guys just started dating and having sex, and I’m a bit frustrated that they didn’t talk about it really at all, particularly since this show features two different languages spoken on screen. Genuinely looking forward to seeing how this one finishes. 

See Your Love

I’m not sure this show is exactly working that well, but everyone is very pretty and I’m having a decent time watching it. I like the way Shao Peng stands up for himself, and I like that nothing that’s happened has been totally unbelievable or unreasonable (at least with the mains). I’ll be curious how the hard of hearing and deaf viewers respond to this one once it’s complete. 

Love is Like a Poison

This show is actually so funny. I love that Shiba is in his own lawyer genre separate from everyone else, and I really like how the two of these guys have become a team. I’m curious how they manage to resolve the scamming next week, but this has been the most unexpected dynamic of the year. 

Love in the Air: Koi no Yukon

MAME won this year, y’all. We all have complicated feelings about her, but she’s secured a loving adaptation from a Japanese team that’s put solid effort into bringing her characters to life. Every character feels correct compared to their Thai counterpart we saw on screen, and that’s a strong sign that the writing behind MAME’s work is strong, even if we all have issues with the way she tackles certain themes. I’m really impressed with this adaptation, and really like this version of Rain.I also feel like this show is doing a better job blending the forthcoming couple focus shift.

Our Youth

We just got this show, but damn does it feel sharp! I’m always going to be a sucker for a cinephile character, and I’m so compelled by the way Minase is drawn to Hirukawa. The scene in episode 2 where Minase has to leave Hirukawa’s house might be one of the most impressive sequences we’ve had in a while, requiring a great deal of choreography and effort from the actors and the camera crew to pull off, and I’m excited to see how these characters split and then come back together. 

Smells Like Green Spirit

Let me just say that I need another Abe Alan appearance when he isn’t playing a character doing horrible things to his students. I’ve enjoyed meditating on the 90s with this show and what that era felt like. I’ve liked how the show has tried to focus on how different parents (especially the moms) have responded to their kids coming to terms with themselves. I’ve also really enjoyed the friendship that’s grown between Mishima and Kirino. I’m struggling with Yumeno a lot, because I’m really not a friend of bully romances. Still, I feel like this is one of those shows I’ll remember for a long time because of its focus on the 90s. 

Blue Canvas of Youthful Days

I think @lurkingshan covered reactions to episode 5 and episode 6 better than I could, and I loved @twig-tea giving context for the film history moment in episode 6. I remember screaming into the chat for friends to show up for this when I got to that moment. This show has two great pairs of dynamics going on that mirror well. It’s got such a strong handle on its characters’ motivations and how they would respond to the actions from each other. It’s probably the tightest thing I’m watching now, backed by extremely dialed-in performances. I will be thinking about Qi Lu organizing his potential first kiss with Qin Xiao, and how unapologetic he’s been about the entire affair. He’s being selfish here, but I kinda like it. I’m so thankful that we are somehow still getting this show, because goddamn do the Chinese actors deliver on chemistry sometimes.

Interview With the Vampire Season 2

I finished this with a friend last week, and holy fuck is this show still so, so good. We watch a lot of gay romance because of BL, and I am having so much fun watching the show about gay divorce. I loved the time we spent in Paris, Daniel’s shifting role in the narrative, and the new insights we got into Lestat this season. I will miss Claudia so much, and I have to give a standing ovation to Delainey Hayles stepping into the role of Claudia and doing the damn thing this season. I just love seeing my little fucked up gay people torment each other on screen.

I'm still thinking about Louis and Lestat reuniting in a hurricane after Claudia derided this as yet another chapter in their stormy romance.

Dropped Shows

Unfortunately, everyone can’t win. Some of these shows are just too long for me to keep up with them, and oftentimes I get bored. I’ve currently dropped:

Lovesick 2024 - I may go back. We’ll see

Jack & Joker - It’s just too long, and they just killed Jennie and a kid. I’m good.

Fourever You - I’m bored with Earth always playing this character type.

Pluto - Namtam and Film are beautiful, but this looks too messy right now.

Every You, Every Me - Wasn’t intrigued after episode 1, but the commentary may draw me back.

Kidnap - Ohm is not enough to keep me invested in this show. 

Uncle Unknown - How did they make a 6 minute show feel slow?

I’m genuinely not trying to be harsh to Thai shows out here, but I just do not have the time to keep up with all of them when they’re this long and dragging.

Thanks for stopping by, and let me know if there’s something I missed that I should check out.

[the-silver-peahen-residence]

Megumi felt his face darken hearing this. How the hell does this guy live even after all this? It was sick and wrong. However, he was worried about his plan to use her to get others here.

"....." She didn't move seeing him finally let her chin go, moving away as she tries struggling again to get free but the damn chains were tight around her wrists. After the two times he used rope, he used chains to stop her from getting out.

"Anyway...the body does provide a good substance for a soul. All I need to do is to use the remains of the soul, remnant and put it into an animatronic under my control. I never thought I had this kind of power before" Metal Zilla shrugs his arms as he picks up a pizza cutter from the table. "This place is great! The kids are a pain in the ass since I started working here." The man is wearing a long light brown trenchcoat with a hoodie, he has long sleeves. Daichi can't see his face thanks to the mask he's wearing. But his voice is so full of himself.

"......"

"But they do make great resources! Easy to take and easy to corrupt! But now I feel like I need to move on to the adults! But it's hard to get some but one. The good thing is...I'm going to use that shitty security guard! Zilla is good for something besides singing."

"*Muffled grunting while struggling again* Mfffmmm!!!"

"Anyway...I gotta get back to work!" He said. "I still have about 5 more bodies to work on before getting their souls out. But who knows? If you behave I Might let you out...just kidding! You are going to be good and lure your so called friends here. I'm sure you'll be happy to see them again." he smiled.

"So...what do you have to say about that?" he asked to look at her but Miko said nothing feeling him sigh. "Here, why don't you speak right and tell me?" he asked reaching to lower the gag as she gasps coughing.

"..Hmm?"

"I think your t..terrible! How could you! Your nothing but a creep and murderer to those poor kids! What did they even do to you!?" she shouted.

"EVERYTHING! THOSE BRATS DESERVED IT AND IF YOUR ANGRY ABOUT IT GET OVER IT!" he shouted. "I deserve to get what I want even if it means killing someone else!" he glares at her. "Even if it means torturing someone else.." he said showing the pizza cutter near her cheek. However, she looks quiet for him to sigh.

"You don't get it though..I'm doing this for a reason..now...I'm sure whoever sees this will be happy your safe....why not say something?" he asked but Miko looks up at the camera.

"Guys! If your seeing this; don't come down here! I'll be fine! Please, you don't want to come down here!" she said but he laughs finding her funny.

"Oh what a joke you are Miko-chan!" he snickered but as he leans in about to almost cut her cheek seeing the cutter cut her skin drawing blood. "Why not say more?" He teased.

However, she quickly knees him hard in the stomach hearing him groan henching over. She begins struggling more working on trying to get out before seeing Anaconda. He was trying to break the chains again.

"Anaconda!" she was looking to him hearing the other coughing before he growls getting mad. "!?...Anaconda, run! Get out of here and warn the others! Tell them not to come here!" she said seeing him not wanting to leave her.

"I'll be okay. Just go!" she said before she tires using her strength to break the chains only to see Anaconda rush out away as she sees the other growling to stand up.

"WHY YOU BITCH!" he shouted to hit Miko hard as she coughs wincing a bit. "Tch....I'll have to have them look for that thing. But in the meantime....*faces Miko angry*..since you wanna be a brat! I'll have to punish you again for it!" he said cutting her free but saw her trying to run only for him to pick her up over his shoulder.

"LET ME GO!! LET ME GO!!" she shouted kicking but he keeps carrying her away. "LET GOOOOO!!"

"Once I deal with you..it's back to work but lets work on that mouth of yours!" he shouted as she screams kicking before the door slams shut behind him leaving Miko's screams before they were fading away leaving silence.

The roars and the shouts are heard before it becomes silent as something is heard shut. A door. Muffled shouts are heard before laughter is heard, "With this, I can make a new animatronic! Thanks to those brats, I can collect enough agony to make more of these things! It's thanks to that stupid owner who wouldn't give up. Hell, they brought in some damn brats..." Said a figure. It sounded male.

Megumi didn't like that at all. What was he planning to do?! Make more of the animatoric but it sounds like he would make it more danger and disturbing where it might get even worse. He saw Miko struggling but she glares at him while still moving.

"Oh well...I just need to move and leave this dump. Not before bringing more brats in here!" He cackled. "I just need to use those dumb robots and a helper to bring them here."He said.

Someone came into view, he wore a grey Zilla mask, this one looked metal as it had yellow eyes. He looks at Miko, "Tell me...I wonder which of your friends will get here first. The girls, the boys, or that brother and sister! Who knows! It makes the game fun, doesn't it?"

"......" Miko still tries to struggle but he sighed to look at her.

"Now now, don't struggle. You'll hurt yourself like that. I can't let a fresh offering get ruined." he said only to hear more sickening crunch noises to see himself. Miko saw blood on him but also saw the animatronic show up but it was coated in blood along with holding a bloody axe.

Right away Miko's face pales a little. "Though, again, we just begun the game..I'm sure you'll have loads of fun..won't you? Besides, I still didn't forgive you for that kick earlier after you escaped twice. TWICE!" he shouted as he slams the axe above her head almost cutting her hands but missed.

"With your wrestling moves and all that punching and kicking. That hurt you know. BUT! I forgive you for it." he pouts to grip her chin forcing her to look at him.

"I mean after all....I had sooooooo fun making sure you didn't do it again." he said glaring at her but Miko kept looks at him seeing the bloody axe near by.

"So lets see if we can have more guests show up...but you'll be fine won't you.." he smiled petting Miko's head while she was still struggling hoping she can break free again.

"But lets see...maybe you can lead your friends here for me! You can be so helpful and I know I can get them trapped.." he giggled but Miko shook her head furiously not wanting that. He looks to her but he only glares seeing the mask up close that she stares into his glowing yellow eyes.

"Don't you fucking say no to me...you're lucky I didn't kill you.." he said as she was quiet. "Just because you got lucky, I'll be sure you don't...so unless you want me to cut that pretty little head of yours..behave." he warns.

[what-eats-owls]

It matters how you do it

I finished Dragon Age: The Veilguard and had some big feelings about it. Spoilers for basically everything under the cut, and frankly, it won't make sense unless you've finished the game anyway.

First of all: I had a blast with this game. I didn't find Act 1 slow, I did find Act 2 a bit of a whack-a-mole, and then Act 3 kicks you in the kidney (complementary) while insisting it's for your own good.

I've seen some recurring complaints: that it lacks depth/edge/darkness, that it abandons previous lore, that the previous choices don't matter. I don't entirely disagree. To me, it felt like a massive Dragon Age 4 game that pivoted to a different, tighter game after complaints about bloat in Inquisition. The key is that when editing down, there's such a thing as trying to trim the fat and taking a chunk of the roast with it.

I enjoy the concept of Lucanis's character, and the voice actor sold the hell out of him, but the storyline felt like being taken to a museum and allowed to see one (1) beautiful unfinished sculpture. Why did Spite, specifically, work? We know the spirit of Justice became Vengeance by abomination, we knew Solas was Wisdom before he became Pride, so what was Spite before, and why wasn't that tied to Lucanis's own personal arc? (Doubly so if you romance him!)

Similarly, Harding was a delight, and her greenhouse was such a lovely little haven. I would have loved to see more explanation of the connection between plants and the titans, and how Harding's own personal struggles with rage connected to that of the titans. She has every reason to be angry and scared, and the game tells us she pushed that away—but we don't actually see her toxic positivity manifest to that degree, until she abruptly has an angry clone.

On the flip side, I loved the other five character quests, and I felt they had solid, poignant arcs that delivered. I also adored their interactions with the codex—if anything, I wanted to see more of that type of interaction on the screen. You have to fill in a lot of the character work for Rook yourself; Rook has all these interesting potential backgrounds, but I think starting the game playing through those, a la Origins, would have gone miles towards establishing more personal stakes up front and made for a stronger start.

So that's all my nitpicking. But let's talk about the bigger theme: It matters how you do it.

In the first Fade conversation with Solas, he gets so mad when Rook refuses to let him DARVO them about the consequences of his botched ritual. This makes way more sense when you understand he's literally imprisoned by his own regrets, and he needs Rook to have that same kind of regret in order to take his place. His entire arc is about rationalizing binary choices and shitty actions that hurt others in the name of a hypothetical greater good that he wants.

Solas can't engineer every binary choice Rook's forced into, but he uses Varric to maximize Rook's regret. He is trying to quite literally mold Rook into him, and the game is great at presenting this both as a coldblooded manipulation and a broken plea for validation—if you let it. You don't have to give Solas a moment of consideration; you don't have to take time to view his memories, or kill his demons, or listen to those scraps of Mythal still holding onto the good in him. You don't have to do any of it.

But you can. And in the end, it matters.

It matters because for every companion, you can encourage them to either be more nurturing/compassionate or destructive/closed off versions of themselves, and that is frequently tied to continuing or breaking from a cycle. (The exception is either Neve or, presumably, Lucanis, who are forced into the Hardened version depending on which city you save.) These aren't presented as morally opposing choices, just who you want them to be. You can see how the Grey Wardens fucked up bad with griffons and decide they have a better place. You can help Emmrich face his fear by finding deeper meaning in life instead of indefinitely postponing death. You can help them do things differently.

So when you get to the final choice in the game, you may have two options: physically force Solas into saving the Veil, or trick him into it. The kind of binary choice Solas has molded you into making by pelting you with cruelty and manipulation.

Or, if you've taken the time, you can get him to understand he's wrong. You bring out the people who saw the best in him and speak to what he's had to endure, even as you're showing him there's another way. You reach him not as Pride, but as Wisdom. And he goes willingly.

Ultimately, I think DA2 and Inquisition grappled with big questions of oppression and violence, faith and authority. It makes sense for those games to delve into harder, uglier subject matter, and ask you to make binary calls.

But my read of Veilguard is that, at its core, it's about how those decisions are meant to trap you in regret at best, and numb you to rationalizing cruelty at worst. It's why the companion who loses their home city becomes colder, more isolated, in response—more like Solas.

That's why it offers you a third way at the very end, but only if you've worked for it. A better way is possible, yet it has to be more than words. You have to understand where the pain comes from, what maintains and is being maintained by the current cycle. Then, and only then, can you break it.

I can't wait to play it again.

P.S. Utterly obsessed with the Trevisan fish merchant.

[uselesseaweedbrain]

Supercorptober - 13. L-Corp

And- boom. Kara has blobbed the article. It’s done. The aliens will know, will be able to protect themselves, and Kara might get fired, but- with all these lives in the balance, this feels worth it, still.

Before Kara has too much time to dwell on her grim fate as a journalist, NSYNC sounds in the room - You're all I ever wanted, You’re all I ever needed, yeah-

“Lena!”, Kara answers her phone enthusiastically, relieved for the distraction.

“Kara, I think I found something. Funding into a facility that was supposedly defunct. It’s big enough to build almost anything, or hide something-“

A buzz, clutter, and the sound of something falling on the end of the line. Kara changes into her super-suit faster than anyone can blink, is already out the window when she calls:

“Lena?”

Footsteps, no answer. Kara is already halfway over to L-Corp, it will be fine-

“Stay back!”

Almost there - Kara can hear Lena’s erratic heartbeat and three others’, sounds of struggle-

“Lena?!”

Lena doesn’t answer. It doesn’t matter. 

Supergirl is close, a handful of milliseconds away, Lena will be safe.

A gasp and a cry; a body free falling from the skyscraper’s balcony.

Long hair. Lena’s perfume.

Kara dives headfirst before any conscious thought can form, her arms folding around Lena as she stops their fall and bundles her up in a bridal carry.

“Lena-“, she whispers, and Lena’s hand grips the fabric of her suit like a lifeline.

But in this moment, she’s not Kara. She’s Supergirl. And Supergirl should be maintaining boundaries with Lena Luthor. 

Kara can’t bring herself to care.

Lena is in her arms, both their hearts beating too fast, and Kara hovers in the air - a handful of seconds, minutes, she can’t tell -, thoughts too jumbled and mind too panicked, her hearing focused on Lena’s still beating heart.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump. The rhythmic sound is enough to drown everything else. Lena’s alive, she’s alive. She’s alive.

If Lena had plummeted to her death, not knowing to yell for Kara- not knowing Kara would come-

“Lena”, she murmurs again. “I’ve got you, it’s me, it’s Kara, you’re safe. You’re okay. I’ve got you.”

Lena doesn’t answer.

Kara squeezes her gently against her chest.

She can still hear the imbecilic criminals above her on the balcony, can see them looking at each other in panic as she rises, Lena safe in her arms.

“Dropped something?”, she snarks. 

Her freeze breath makes quick work of them, allowing her to deposit Lena on the solid ground of her balcony’s stone paving.

Lena still hasn’t spoken.

“I’ll be right back’”, Kara promises, pulling her earpiece from a hidden pocket and tapping it twice, before gathering the goons’ unconscious bodies and piling them on the balcony.

“Alex. Three men. They attacked Lena just now. Yes, she’s safe. Yes- Yes, I just need you to pick them up, L-Corp. Lena’s office, top floor. They’re on the balcony, all tied up. Thank you, Alex. Bye.”

Lena stands shell-shocked on her stilettos for the duration of the whole operation, unresponsive, but docilely following when Kara takes her by the hand and leads her to sit on her couch, closing the balcony door behind them.

Kara sits down slowly opposite Lena, grasping both her hands in hers as she tries to catch Lena’s empty gaze. 

“Lena”, she calls gently. “It’s okay, you’re okay, you’re safe. You’re okay, Lena, I promise, I’m here, you’re okay. Just, try to stay with me, okay?”

Lena squeezes Kara’s hands absently, and Kara smiles encouragingly.

“That’s good. You’re doing great. Just- tell me three things you can see, Lena, anything you want, just three things.”

Lena’s voice comes out strangled as she croaks out: “Your skin.”

“Okay, good, you’re doing well. What else?”

“Your hair”, Lena murmurs, her voice already steadier.

“One last thing, Lena.”

“Your super-suit.”

Kara nods.

“Good. Now, three things you can touch?”

“Your hands- the fabric of the couch- my pantsuit-“

“Perfect, Lena. Now, just breathe with me, okay? Take a breath in - one, two three, four - breath out - one, two, three, four, again, take a deep breath in”- 

 “That’s good, very good, now breathe out, one, two, three, four. Again-“

Lena’s heartbeat slows at last, Kara’s settling with hers as the adrenaline subsides. 

Lena’s okay, Lena’s safe, nothing else matters, and-

Lena’s corporate mask slides back into place as she rises from the couch, taking her hands from under Kara’s and extending her right one in thanks.

“Thank you, Supergirl. I don’t know what I would have done without you, and- I’m sorry you had to see that. I hope I haven’t ruined your evening.”

Oh. Kara recoils instinctively at the formal address, her hands dropping to her sides limply as she gapes.

She doesn’t know it’s me. She didn’t hear me. All of this and she didn’t hear me.

“I- no, of course not- but I-“

“Let me walk you to the door. I can let Agent Danvers in myself, if you’d rather not wait with me, or-“

“Lena.” Kara interrupts. “Did you really not hear me?” 

“Hear you when, Supergirl?” Lena’s tone is even, too controlled, too polished.

She knows. A little voice whispers. This is a test. A game.

I know you believe in her, Kara, but she’s a Luthor.

I’ve learnt the hard way not to trust anything that comes out of a Luthor’s mouth. 

Kara shivers. Lena is secretive, can lie and manipulate like no other, hide her real motives and plan and plot, but it’s always been for the greater good, she’s always helped-

If she turned on her own mother, what’s stopping her from playing the long con on you?

Kara’s fists clench. They’re wrong; they’re all wrong about Lena.

Lena can be trusted, and Kara will prove it.

“Hear me when I caught you, and held you in my arms, and hovered in the air because I just needed to feel for a moment that you were safe. Hear me when I threw all caution to the wind. Hear me when I told you my name.”

Lena’s throat bobs as she swallows, a sheen of tears forming in her eyes as she averts her gaze.

“I- I wasn’t sure if you’d meant to say it. So I thought I’d give you a chance to take it back. Pretend the Luthor didn’t know.”

Kara’s chest aches and twists.

“To- to take it back? How can you- How can you think- Rao, Lena, you almost died!” 

Kara didn’t mean to raise her voice, she didn’t.

But now Lena is folding into herself, making herself smaller, as if to disappear, her gaze averted from Kara’s- there’s a fresh smell of fear in the air-

“Shit, shit, Lena, I’m sorry- I’m so sorry, Lena, I shouldn’t have yelled-“

Kara takes two steps back, then three, stumbling against Lena’s mahogany desk as her own hands tremble.

Lena doesn’t move - just waits, prostrate and in silence - and Kara feels bile rise up in her throat and swallows the urge to puke. 

A knock sounds on the door and none of them move.

“Supergirl? Ms. Luthor? I’m coming in!”

Alex pushes the door open, and Lena straightens but Kara doesn’t - weakly gesturing to the balcony with a “They’re there, Alex.” 

Alex sends her a worried look before calling her team to come in and clean up.

Kara doesn’t want to look at Lena, is afraid to move after her outburst, but she’s making Lena uncomfortable. She should leave.

“I’m sorry, Lena”, she whispers. “I’ll just go- do you- do you need anything? A taxi? A ride home?”

Kara sees Lena shake her head slowly. “No, thank you. Actually, I-“

Kara’s eyes snap up.

“I think I’ll just call George and see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay,” Kara answers quietly.

She exits Lena’s office through the balcony, and if Alex frowns at her departure, she doesn’t comment in front of her team. 

Kara takes to the skies and doesn’t come down - above the clouds, she can think, and forget about the city and the city sounds and the city inhabitants and Lena recoiling at the sound of her voice-

Kara knows she’s powerful - knows she can pound buildings down with her fists, crush metal with her bare hands, bring any element to the point of fusion with her eyes- she knows she’s scary, but Lena-

She reminds Kara of Alex after she broke her hand.

The fear. The realisation that Kara could hurt her. Had the power to crush her. 

Did Lena believe Kara would use it?

************************************

Kara had not gone to sleep but she still had a job to get to - or so she’d assumed, until she reached her office with weary eyes and was called into Snapper Carr’s office, faced with a computer screen displaying her blog, and told in no uncertain words:

“You’re fired, Ponytail.”

Kara had wanted to call Alex, but Alex had other problems, she was surely busy with the DEO and the alien abductions and Lena’s intel from the night before- 

Oh. Golly. 

Kara hadn’t told anyone about it. Had not even gotten the complete information from Lena after the attempt on her life. 

She had lunch scheduled with Lena today - didn’t want to call before she made sure Lena would want to see her - maybe, if Lena forgave her, she could bring it up, after. 

In any case, she had something she thought Lena should have.

Six bags of Big Belly Burger in hand, and a small, squared box in her pocket, Kara headed to L-Corp. As always, she was shown up and into Lena’s office immediately.

“Lena.” Kara began as soon as the door closed behind them. “I’m sorry. I am so sorry for yesterday, for scaring you, for yelling at you-“

Shock registers on Lena’s features and the CEO shakes her head slowly.

“Honestly, this morning, I wasn’t even sure what was real anymore, but- you are her, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

Kara hangs her head in shame before resuming her apology.

“Yes, I am her- it was me, yesterday, all me, and the way I behaved was inexcusable, Lena, I’m so sorry- I would never hurt you, but the way I shouted at you-“

Lena raises her hand and Kara pauses.

“Kara, I know. I know that you would never hurt me. The way I reacted yesterday- it wasn’t your fault."

Kara shakes her head but Lena continues.

“I just- being yelled at, it triggered some bad memories, but it wasn’t you, Kara.” 

“Still- I should have never raised my voice at you. I was scared - you came so close to dying, and if I hadn’t been on the phone- if you hadn’t known and hadn’t called for me- I was terrified, but it wasn’t an excuse. I shouldn’t have yelled. The way you shut down, Rao, Lena-”

It’s Lena who comes closer this time, and Kara who recoils. 

“You don’t have to put yourself through this for me, Lena. I am dangerous, and I know that- the whole world knows that. And I would understand if you weren’t comfortable with me anymore, I can just go-“

A hand on her forearm silences her, and Lena gently intertwines their fingers before leading Kara to the couch. 

“Sit.” Lena orders, and Kara obliges.

Lena sits too, close enough to touch - closer than she ever has before.

“I- Growing up with the Luthors- It wasn’t fun. I loved my father so much - for a bit he was the only one opposing Lillian and protecting me, but he- he wasn’t perfect. I think I erased some of his flaws in my head, because after Lillian’s reveal of my lineage- things started coming back to me. Things like the way father would drink in his office and call me or Lex to assist him. The way he would throw tantrums - or his whiskey glass, or the nearest book - when something didn’t go his way. The way he would sometimes rage and yell and destroy, and the way I would hide behind Lex when he was there. The way father would go back to caring and loving the next day and the way I concluded this was all in my imagination.”

Lena lays a gentle hand on Kara’s clenched fist, and Kara makes a conscious effort to relax. Lionel is dead, there is nothing left to be done anymore other than stand at Lena’s side.

“All this to say that yesterday- the free falling from the balcony had shaken me a bit, and I was not in my right mind. Being yelled at- it triggered things that I can usually control much better, but I was unbalanced, and in shock, and it wasn’t you. Please don’t think that it was you, Kara. Please don’t think I am afraid of you.”

Kara exhales as tears run over her cheek.

“I’m sorry, Lena. I’m the one who should be apologising and asking how you are, and instead, you’re the one comforting me after I made everything worse, and I-“

Kara sniffs and Lena’s hand reaches out to caress her cheek, wiping Kara’s tears so delicately with her thumb that Kara is convinced that Lena has forgotten she’s indestructible. 

Kara closes her eyes and listens to Lena’s steady heartbeat and feels the soothing motion of her thumb on her cheek and thinks that she’s never felt so loved.

“Lena”, Kara whispers in contentment.

Lena hums in response.

The clock ticks in the background and Kara forces herself to open her eyes, reaching for the squared box in her left pocket.

“Lena, yesterday, I- you know that I reacted terribly, but the reason why- I just kept thinking, what if we hadn’t been on the phone then, what if I hadn’t heard and you hadn’t called me, and you had just-”

A pause, and then, almost too hushed to be heard:

"And to be honest, Lena, I- I’m not sure I could have lived with that outcome."

Lena’s sharp intake of breath prompts Kara to squeeze Lena's hand with their still entwined fingers.

“And so- I wanted you to have this.”

Kara pulls the box open, presenting it to Lena who hesitantly extends the hand thats’s not holding Kara’s.

“May I?” Lena asks, and Kara nods.

Lena runs her finger pads over the jet-black watch with something close to reverence, and Kara has to remember how to breathe.

“Is this-“

Kara nods wordlessly.

“This is my family’s watch, and you can use it as one, or-“ Kara reaches out and gently pries the watch open, revealing a silver button with the El-Mayarah sigil. 

“This emits frequencies only audible to Kryptonians. If you press it, I will come, whatever the time or place. And I want you to use it, Lena, whenever you’re in danger, whenever you feel like it, whenever you need me. Please.”

“But- Kara- this- are you sure?”

“Very sure”, Kara whispers, and Lena beams and lets Kara tie the watch to her wrist and- why is Kara's heart beating into overdrive?

[museincarnate]

Subtle apologies would escape Hakkona, when she could tell that Tazz was in great discomfort while the Buff Gal was trying to help her up a little; her attention split between her best friend, as well as her former attacker and the arriving Saiyan of Decay. From the moment that the white-haired male showed up, the Saiyaness knew that one of them had been defeated by the villainous trio, and the taste it left in her mouth was bitter... Sour, even, to a point where a scowl etched itself on her features.

Still, despite her distaste for her former lover's defeat, she listened to every word that Castor said to his ally, and found herself... Conflicted, over how Ghost was being treated by The Cure. Regardless of how she felt, though, the duo made their getaway, as both sides were injured, fatigued, and likely beyond a further confrontation, for the moment. When Hakkona heard the Luparian speak, though, she would immediately bring her attention back to her.

Helping Tazz steady herself, the daughter of Torno would help the wolfish woman as they made their way to Yujin, while her heart felt like it was beating in her throat; stress threatening to overwhelm the Saiyaness, as she tried to hastily reach her former lover, while making sure Tazz's pain wasn't made worse. Once the duo did reach the Prodigal Son, however...

Yujin could just barely make out their forms, as the world around him looked like nothing more than blurs of color, while he felt as though the weight of an entire planet was weighing his body down; his previous symptoms caused by Castor's blood-tipped needles only worsening, as he struggled to keep himself awake and alert. Hakkona would get just close enough for her and Tazz to kneel next to him, as grief and panic overtook the Saiyaness; keeping her from supporting her own weight, as well as the Luparian's. Without delay, the Buff Gal would begin removing all of the needles that were still stuck in her former lover, while the Son of Shuen wheezed and struggled to draw breath.

"H-Hey..." Weakly, he'd try to speak to both of the muscular women, while not at all being able to see the states they were in, let alone properly hear much of anything, as his body was failing him; struggling against the poisonous properties of his foe's blood. "D-Did we... Win?" With each labored breath he took, the Buff Gal felt as though she was going to lose her composure, and begin crying. Instead, though, she had to do something to help Yujin, even if it was drastic.

"Tazz, I need you to make a cut somewhere that won't cause too much blood loss! Dad told me about old remedies for things growing up, and bloodletting might help Yujin purge the poison, or make the effects less severe! I'd do it myself, but..." As she was speaking, Yujin's breathing grew more labored; leaving her to act without finishing her words, or even letting other feelings be brought back to her, as her lips met with his own, and she began performing light CPR. While she was fully aware that they had romantic history together, it mattered little, as she tried to do anything that would allow him to breathe, and not die in front of her.

This victory was hollow, and wouldn't even be a win for them, if Hakkona failed to save the man she once loved as her mate, and lost someone still so dear to her. If there was a god that she could pray to, that would answer her pleas, she would pray, but... She had to do what she could, and rely on those she knew like Tazz, to keep another life from being lost!

Before the Scorched Saiyan could manage another word, the light within his eye sockets began to dim, while the blue flames that surrounded the battlefield they claimed dissipated; a slight, albeit weak chuckle once more escaping Ghost's husk, before an initial set of footsteps could be heard quickly nearing him and the Luparian...

"T-Tazz!" The Buff Gal, fresh off of her skirmish with the Undying Saiyaness, would quickly bring herself to a knee, and offer the wolfish woman assistance in, at the very least, sitting up; keeping her gaze away from the Scorched Saiyan, even in his sorry, defeated state. "I can feel Yujin's energy from here, and it's getting weaker by the second! We have to go help him!"

Just as she was begging her best friend to come with her, will herself to move again to check on Hakkona's former partner, another set of footsteps approached the do-gooders, as well as Ghost; the latter just clinging to life, as his gaze fell upon his foes. Castor, however, saw no urgency in approaching his dying ally, and the two warriors who somehow came out of their battles as the winners. Instead, a casual stroll towards the Scorched Saiyan would be the pace that was taken, until the Saiyan of Decay stood over his burned associate; a look of agitation etching itself onto the visage of The Cure.

"Look at you. Unlike Pholomena, I expected you to be smarter about things, yet here you are; falling apart and dying." Groaning, the Saiyan of Decay temporarily brought his attention towards the two women not far from both himself and his associate, while not offering a word towards them; instead internally debating on whether or not he should push the battle any further, and take them both on. Personally, he would've chosen to attempt to end their lives, like he assumed he did to Yujin, but he wasn't that naïve. No, instead he would scoop up the charred, nearly crumbling body of his Scorched ally, and begin ascending into the air; presuming that neither of the do-gooders would try to stop him, in their frantic and fatigued states.

"Count yourself lucky that I still have use for you, Ghost. Just stay alive awhile, so this isn't a complete waste of my time and effort, got it?" And with that, the remaining villainous Saiyans left the city that had turned into the six warriors' battlefield, with the only victorious Saiyan carrying Ghost off, hastily, and leaving Hakkona and Tazz by themselves, with their redheaded ally's condition unknown, until they made the attempt to reach him.

For the time being... The side of good had won, though a lingering feeling in the air would make the victory seem small... Hollow, even.

[hygienic-soap-dispenser]

Hws Nordics as University Students Headcanons

Because I am a suffering student and you need to suffer with me <3

Denmark

The clown of the group

Has trouble focusing/paying attention

Will use other Nordics in group study session with the goal of body doubling to keep each other in check and focused, but often devolves to laughing and banter instead

Offers good moral support and asks a lot of questions in class, has great participation marks, but can go off topic

Rallies people to meet when need to discuss group projects, again he is great moral support

When writing he either cannot write anything or speed types and hyperfocuses, no in-between

Appears self-confident and social but can actually struggle with self esteem and seeming like he's incompetent or "too much" for people, tries to compensate by being extra likeable and useful

Bonds with people over humor, socializing and making friends are more important than grades to him

Only chooses classes that interest him, does surprisingly well as a result

The most likely of the Nordics to be late for class

Goes to a lot of college parties

Sweden

The mom of the group, always checking in on people and making sure everyone feels included

Reformed high school bully, but still gossips with Norway about classmates and faculty

Has very high standards for himself and his work, will force people in his group projects to do at least 2 rounds of editing

Can really get in the zone and hyperfocuses when studying, but to do that he needs his noise cancelling headphones, his stim toy, perfect room temperature, comfy study clothes, and his daily ritual to actually start

Refuses to pull all-nighters to finish assignments, sleep is more important to him (king)

Is professional with group projects, is calm and good with delegating work

At the same time, he is very opinionated and loves to debate people in and out of class. Often argues with specific students

Easily overwhelmed from noises, activities, and group projects, needs to find quiet places to hide

Gets good grades, professors either love him or forget he exists

Is part of some interest clubs, like for art and woodworking

Norway

The mysterious hottie who sits in the back of class

Hates group projects, doesn't contribute much to them unless it's with his favourite people (other Nordics, specifically Sweden)

Doesn't contribute much in class, but when he does it is good

The class health nut, goes out for 6 am and 11 pm jogs (he is insane)

Also tbh he gives off the vibe of someone who'd be a health nut but also really into drugs at the same time?? Like he does sports and yoga and tracks his water consumption and macros but at the same time experiments with drugs to "expand his spiritual worldview"?

Is fine with concentration, doesn't really struggle unless there's a lot going on in his head at the time

On that topic, he frequents the counseling and medical clinic. There have been rumors about his frequent medical visits...

His writing is okay, nothing to write home about, but then sometimes can get very poetic and profound, especially when it's a personal topic

Gossips a lot with Sweden, they like to people watch together

Skips a lot of classes, somehow still passes

Finland

Perfectionist and an over-achiever, bases a lot of his self-worth on grades. Will get upset if he gets anything below an A-

Can feel like he's in a competition with classmates for good grades and approval from professors, will ask a lot of questions and tries to start discussions in class

Will talk to the professor right after the end of the 1st class to introduce himself and establish dominance

Tries to humble brag about school and his work ethic by telling classmates how often he crams and pulls all-nighters

Very anxious about grades, always does well (at the cost of his mental health)

Mostly sustains himself on energy drinks and coffee

Doesn't like group projects because he thinks no one else cares about doing well as much as he does

This isn't helped by the fact that he has trust issues and thinks others will let him down

Frequents the counseling center and medical clinic on campus. The former because of stress and trauma which worsens school stress, the latter because of medical issues as a result of said stress

Professors either love him or hate him

Despite how he acts in class he's actually a people-pleaser, but his over-achieving nature can be hard to deal with

Goes to the campus gym at least once a week to lift weights, probably part of the school hockey club

If he survives, will pursue graduate school

Iceland

The freshman, trying to figure things out

Thinks that because he did well in high school he'll have an easy time in university (he won't and will be humbled)

Sits in the back of class but secretly wants to sit up front with the "nerds", doesn't want to risk making a fool of himself

Overanalyzes group projects and panics. Double/triple checks his work before sending in his contributions because he wants to seem competent in their eyes

Usually reserved but once he opens up will say the most out of pocket things, sometimes it slips in his quiet phase

Surprisingly, is among the worst of the Nordics in terms of grades. This is mainly because he is unconfident in his own work and views, so he often ends up self-sabotaging his work or doing the bare minimum

His friends are his main priority in school, not grades

Like Fin, is a people-pleaser. Unlike Fin, he is easy to get along with

[mistriavalley]

Alex is down bad for you (gn!farmer)

Note: Got this idea from @sagegotthesauce

TW: none

Masterlist

Alex is handsome, tall and strong and can be incredibly charming when he wants to. So obviously he thought it would be an easy thing to leave an especially good first impression on the hot new farmer when they walked over to introduce themselves. Just that it wasn't easy at all.

"You're the new-? Cool. Yeah. Alex." Wait what the fuck was that? Why the fuck did his breath get caught in his throat when he tried to speak to you? Maybe next time he will do better

His strength is...well, his strength. It's an important asset of his so naturally he tries to catch your attention by lifting weights infront of his house. He sees you by Pierre's or close to the Saloon? The dumbbells and weights are out the same second he lays his eyes on you and then he acts as if he doesn't notice you at all while grunting in an exaggerated way just to make you look at him

Alex craves to have a proper conversation with you, but so far you've only ever greeted him. The most you've said to him was when you introduced yourself. Normally he doesn't struggle with talking to someone he likes, but with you he finds himself to be nervous for the first time since...well...forever

The day he finds you alone at the beach during summer is like a gift from the heavens. With his gridball tugged under his arm, he confidently walks over to you and suggests to play catch. That way he can impress you with his athletic skills. Unfortunately you don't seem too into it and you don't even try to catch the ball which leads to you guys not really playing any catch

Nevertheless, you still tell him that you believe he would make a great gridball player. You might have just said that to be polite, but when I tell you that his growing crush for you makes him absolutely delusional. It definitely gets to his head and he wants, no, needs more. Any sort of compliment or praise leaving your sweet lips is like throwing treats at a dog

You start to live in his mind rent-free faster than he anticipated. His mind goes to you first thing in the moment and he has a mental picture of you in his head when he falls asleep. Hell, you even visit him in his dreams regularly and when that happens he wakes up with a lovestruck grin on his face

Whenever Evelyn mentions that she wants to send you her famous cookies over mail, Alex jumps to his feet. Why send it when he can walk over to your farm by himself?

Then one day you gift him an egg! From one of your chickens! What a time to be alive. Alex doesn't know if he should eat it or keep it, because it's something you gave him. He knows he can't keep it around forever though

Haley makes fun of him over the fact that he's so obviously head over heels for you. I mean, he is acting kinda pathetic with the way his eyes don't leave you for a second the moment you enter his vision or the way he oh so desperately begs asks for your attention. You're also the only thing he ever talks about nowadays

But then you do the unthinkable and ask him to be your partner for the flower dance! Oh, he doesn't know how to react. Alex feels like his heart is going to jump out of his chest and he's trying so hard to act all cool, but he's a mess. While he stares at you with a lovey-dovey look, he only manages a hasty nod, accompanied by a side-eye from Haley of course

It's so adorable how he messes up almost every single step of the dance. The same dance he's been participating in for years now and which steps he can usually perform in his sleep. Do you notice how nervous and excited he is? He's really hoping that you don't. Hell, he's even sending silent prayers to Yoba

"Hey, so I thought that uh you'd maybe wanna hang out? With me? Alone?" Just play it cool, Alex. You might have fucked that up on an ungodly level, but you gotta own it now. Wing it, man. "Like a date? I'd love to!"

He short circuits, blinks a couple times and is working hard to process your answer. You wanna go? With him? I mean, that is exactly the result he was hoping for when he was practicing this shit infront of the bathroom mirror, but he genuinely didn't think he'd get that far. Not with you. Not with the way he has been embarrassing himself infront of you the past months

He books a separate room at the saloon and everything is planned out up until the tiniest detail. Nothing could possibly go wrong. Well, unless he's acting like a desperate and pathetic fool again which he normally does when you're in his proximity

And holy shit it's so easy to talk to you? Don't get me wrong, he's still so fucking nervous and so fucking ready to roll out the red carpet for you just for showing up, but you're also such an easy going person. You two basically click immediately which you thought was the case a long time ago already, but he only now properly experiences this. In the past conversations you two have shared, Alex was always too busy not to seem like a complete looser

At the end of the date he of course walks you home like the gentleman he is. Your hands brush against each other during that and everytime that happens it sends jolts of electricity through his arm right into his chest where is heart is beating like crazy

You stop at your front door where you bless him with a smile and place your warm hand on his chest. This man is on cloud 9 and feels like he could fly away this instant. Then you completely rock his world by putting your lips, the same ones he's been daydreaming about 24/7, on his and he fights back a sigh. The butterflies are having a rave in his stomach right now

[erikftglitter]

Christmas in Winona Springs 🤍🎄

Terry Richmond AU

Created By: Erikftglitter

Terry’s car had been giving him trouble for miles. He was headed north to visit his great aunt. He was also fond of the thought of a change of scenery, but the flat tire had put an abrupt halt to his plans. The only thing that he could see through the hovering clouds were a few cabins nestled among the trees.

Terry figured that this would be the only way to fix his problem in the current climate. He would check the cabin out, take a look, and find someone to help.

To Terry’s surprise, as he got closer to the cabins, he discovered that it was an actual resort. It was home to many different cabins and lodges, as well as camping grounds, tents, and a connecting lake. In the midst of the inconvenience, Terry still took time to appreciate the beautiful scenery.

He was greeted upon arrival within seconds.

The gentleman was older, his face lined with years, but he was as welcoming as could be. He was dressed comfortably and typical for someone who ran a cabin business. He sported a red and black flannel shirt and khaki work pants. He greeted Terry with a warm smile and ushered him out of harsh winds of the evening.

After accepting the man’s hospitality and enjoying coffee, Terry eventually explained his circumstance. He figured that the man would know someone with car services. Terry would happily fix the tire himself but he couldn’t get the tire off without the proper equipment.

“It’s late. Thankfully your car knew where to cause trouble.” The man chuckled. “Why don’t you settle in for the night and we can revisit this in the morning?” He offered.

“Are you sure?” Terry felt hesitant. It was never his intention to expect a hand out. He had took care of himself since a child and wasn’t fond of being a freeloader.

“I don’t want to cause any trouble. I can just call a tow truck or—”

“Nonsense. You’re in a pickle. It happens to the best of us.” The man smiled. His morals refused to allow anyone to struggle in his presence. “Stay the night. Get you some food, and tomorrow, we’ll fix that tire. No worries.”

Terry wasn’t sure what to make of it, but something in the older man’s voice—the calm certainty—made him set aside any skepticism. He didn’t have many other options and at least he’d be warm and safe.

“Thank you,” Terry finally said. He let his eyes roam the longue. It was supplied with wooden tables, warm, brown furniture with blankets topped over them, and the faint smell of apples and cinnamon felt surprisingly homey.

“My name’s Lee, by the way,” the man said as he led Terry to a clean room. “If you’re up for it, I’ll make you a drink.”

After the many hours of driving, and the ultimate disappointment of not arriving at his destination, Terry allowed Lee to make him a drink.

They sat at the small resort bar for hours. Terry found Lee to be an entertaining man. They sat and talked about everything and nothing. Lee told stories about the craziest experiences that he’s had over the years. A runaway bride being the most memorable. He got a great laugh out of eating on the wedding cake for weeks.

Terry shared a little about himself as well, but he didn’t think of himself as really interesting. He talked about his great aunt, who he was going to visit, his brief time in the service, and that is all that Terry Richmond summed himself up to be. Lee listened to everything though, patiently, never pushing, never judging.

He hadn’t expected to find comfort in the middle of nowhere, but here he was—sitting across from a stranger who felt more like an old friend. Lee was a wise man.

That night, Terry sat awake in the small guest room Lee had given him, staring at the ceiling, listening to the quiet hum of the place. Tomorrow, he’d help out around the resort to show his appreciation. For the first time in a long while, Terry felt needed.

[Two Months Later]

Terry never had the chance to see his great aunt before she succumbed to her illness. Stage 4 pancreatic cancer wasn’t an easy battle, and he’s just relieved that she was no longer suffering.

When Lee heard of the news he insisted that Terry stay the week. Being the honest man that he was, Terry wouldn’t allow Lee to house him without helping out. Business was going to become busy again as skiing became more common during the cooler months and Terry was determined to make it easier for Lee. He couldn’t stand the thought of Lee being left to repair cabins in the unforgiving weather condition and snow.

He helped him locate leaks and level the floor inside of the noisier cabins. Lee’s resort in Winona Springs was well-loved. Terry would stop to admire the photos that Lee had around the longue of families who came and went. Some even went as far as sending Lee annual holiday cards. Deep down, Terry wondered how it felt to be so loved.

But just as quickly as the thought came it left Terry’s mind. This is how he operated. He was unpredictable and flexible. He hadn’t seen home in months. How could he be loved if he disappeared from time and time again? This was his thing. He knew that he was a lone wolf and spent his adult years not trying to fight it.

Terry often filled in the work orders for Lee. He took quite a fall a few weeks before and Terry found himself being more upset than the older man.

“Terry. I’m old. This is the unrelenting truth of age, bud.” Lee laughed, reaching his hand out for Terry who eagerly helped him off the freshly waxed surface.

“Yeah I get that Lee, but don’t you have a nephew or something to help you out.” Terry’s heartbeat quickened at the realization that Lee was in fact an old man. Their unlikely alliance seemingly provided youth to Lee in Terry’s eyes. He hadn’t thought about the fact that he was definitely old enough to be his father. Definitely too old to run a rigorous business like a cabin resort alone, where snow and ice were detrimental for someone of Lee’s age.

“A nephew? I wish.” Lee sighed. “My brothers died much too soon. They didn’t have time to have any children.” Terry listened. Lee rarely spoke of his own family.

“It’s just me and my little girl.” Lee smiled and reached into his pocket. Terry watched as Lee rummaged through the thick leather wallet before retrieving his point of interest. He offered Terry a photo of a little girl who was missing two front teeth.

“I’m assuming she’s no longer a little girl.” Terry asked, his tone laced with playful sarcasm.

“I’m afraid not. Baby girl’s big time in New York.” Lee sighed. “She visits every Christmas. I just miss the times when we did this together. Just me and her.” Lee looked down. He was starting to remember just how much he missed his family.

“Her mother died during a snowstorm.” Terry took a seat next to Lee. He hadn’t realized that he lost his wife so early on. He gave Lee is undivided attention.

“Car slid right off the road just before Christmas Eve.” Lee still didn’t look up from the floor where his eyes rested. Terry glanced back at the photo and back to Lee. The girl had his exact mocha colored skin tone. Terry wondered how much she resembled the older lad now.

“Is that why you allowed me to stay with you Lee?” Asked Terry. He knew that Lee came from a generation that was built on community, but Lee was more than polite to him. He took Terry in like he was his own.

“Yeah. I feel like she would want me to do that. I wish someone could have done it for her.” Lee admitted. Taking Terry in during a troubled time helped his conscious. He was more than happy to do it. “I had the space and the resources. So why not?” Lee smiled.

“You’re a stand up guy Terry Richmond.” Lee stated. Terry nodded at the praise. He was grateful for the opportunity to listen and learn from Lee.

“Hoping to be like you one day Mr. Parker.” They both laughed at the formality. They sat in silence for a while, silently watching the snow fall onto the ground. Terry wasn’t sure how long he’d be around but he knew that he wouldn’t be leaving his new friend alone anytime soon.

[mysteriouslyjovialcolor]

Belgium 2019

-Ferrari front row lockout!!!

-“Charles Leclerc out qualifying his teammate Sebastian Vettel for the sixth time this season” woahhh

-“Grid penalty for Carlos Sainz on his birthday” That should be illegal

-“I’ll tell you what the Mercedes are a little worried about guys, it’s the Alpha Romeo of Kimi Raikkonen” Yess

-Oh Red Bull made their switch from Pierre to Alex then

-Aaah what’s happening??

-“Sainz has stalled on the grid” On his birthday??

-Sebastian???

-Oh no Kimi and Nico

-Oh wow Sebastian!!

-Maxxxx 😭😭😭 (I said karma would come for him but I didn’t think it would be like thissss!! Or this early??)

-Aaah that was chaotic

-So many cars got damaged

-“Pierre Gasly is up in to 9th from 13th on the grid” This is also karma

-The commentators jinxed Kimi with their comment of the Mercedes being worried about him earlier cause he’s p18 now -very very far from the Mercedes

-What’s going on with Carlos?? Oh no is he out?!

-In contrast, Lando has made it to p5

-“This is probably Vettel’s best chance of passing Leclerc isn’t it” Not today my friend

-Ohmygodd every driver did a fastest lap one after the other! That was such a cool graphic!

-“Leclerc pulling out a big gap now over his teammate” Let’s go Charles let’s go

-Also the Haas?? P6 and 7?!

-“Vettel’s not that quick” Lewis sounding like a fellow student snitching on his classmate

-“Kevin Magnussen putting up a sterling defense against Sergio Perez”

-Charles setting multiple fastest laps, one after the other. He’s really going all in

-Charles casually going off the track but still coming back in the lead

-“Vettel struggling” Come on then Lewis

-“Looks like Vettel is coming towards us” ???

-Ohh they’re trying to back the Mercedes up, it all makes so much sense nowww

-“Here he [Pierre Gasly] is as the leading Red Bull car of the four” The world works in mysterious ways

-Almost every car going past Kevin one by one

-I should never talk up the Haas early in the race, it never ends well for me

-“Pierre Gasly and the Toro Rosso doing everyone a favor cause they’ve shown that the undercut will work here” Wohoo

-“Push now push” “Okay this is critical”

Ferrari 🤝 Mercedes

-Dannyyyy (I just love his every move)

-Ohmygod Pierre!!

-Woah Nico and Kimi

-I swear if Ferrari mess up this strategy for Charles…Okay that was a good pit stop, he’s still behind Sebastian though

-They’re not about to pull team orders are they

-“Let Charles by this lap” They are

-Aah Sebastian and Lewisss

-Come on Sebastian! Ferrari 1-2!!

-Aaah no!!

-“Oh it’s game on now isn’t it? Leclerc versus Hamilton” Haven’t seen much of that yet

-How did this go from a Ferrari 1-2 to a Mercedes 2-3??

-“You need to get up very early in the morning go round the outside of Daniel Ricciardo and Alex Albon was clearly up early this morning. That was a great move”

-“Ricciardo’s been on these tires from lap 1” I’m sorry?? Did I mishear that??

-“I just wanted to to make a point of what a good job Charles Leclerc’s doing with the tire management” The real tire whisperer

-Honestly why do Renault strategies suck?

-“I think Charles is struggling for grip” no he’s nottt

-One more lap, he’s doing thissss

-Lewis back offf

-Come on Charles, come on, come on, come on

-Woah Nico in points?

-Kimi?? No? Antonio Giovinazzi! What happened??

-What the hell how has Lando lost positions?? On the last lap too??

-Aaaah Charles!!

-“For the first time ever Charles Leclerc wins a Firmula 1 Grand Prix!”

-Let’s go!! That was very heartwarming! So so well deserved!!

Rest in peace Anthoine Hubert ❤️

[coochiequeens]

A small victory for women in American politics

Kentucky’s next Supreme Court is shaping up to be a historic one for women. 

Deputy Chief Justice Debra Hembree Lambert will become Kentucky’s chief justice in January. (Administrative Office of the Courts photo)

With the election of Kentucky’s first Black female justice, Pamela Goodwine, women will hold four of the court’s seven seats. Additionally, the court will be led by the first female chief justice, Deputy Chief Justice Debra Lambert, starting in January. 

As of earlier this year, 17 states have female majorities on their supreme court benches, according to a report from the Brennan Center for Justice. Alaska was also poised to gain a female majority after seven women sought a seat on its Supreme Court this summer. 

Goodwine’s election also makes her the first woman in history who will serve at every level of Kentucky’s judiciary branch: district court, circuit court, appeals court and the Supreme Court. . She said in a statement to the Kentucky Lantern that the milestone “reminds me of the women who came before me, paving the way through hard work, determination and resilience, often overcoming significant obstacles to reach their goals.” 

“Their struggles paved the way for our successes today, and it is our duty to continue their legacy and to forge a path for others as well,” Goodwine said. “Throughout my life, education and career, I have faced what many described as insurmountable challenges, but I don’t give up on my dreams when things get hard. I simply work harder to make my dreams come true.” 

Women outnumber men in law schools

Two previous female justices — Sara Walter Combs and retired Janet Stumbo — both say the new majority of women on the high court is a reflection of the increase in women in the legal profession. 

In 2016, women for the first time made up the majority of students in the nation’s law schools, according to the American Bar Association, which says the change came slowly. In 1963, only 4% of first-year law students were female, rising to 20% in 1973, 39% in 1983 and 44% by 1993.

In Kentucky last year women made up the majority of law students at the University of Louisville (53%) and Northern Kentucky University (55%). Female and male enrollment were about even at the University of Kentucky in 2023-24 with 203 women and 206 men enrolled in the law school.

Judge Sara Walter Combs Combs was the first woman to serve on Kentucky’s Supreme Court after being appointed by Gov. Brereton Jones in 1993. She now serves on the Kentucky Court of Appeals. When she began taking law classes at night at the University of Louisville, she said she was one of very few women in her law class. 

“When I started my work career, I was a teacher, and the one thing that women could do, predominantly in that period of our history, was to teach or to be a nurse,” Combs said. “Well, they’re still wonderful professions; it’s just a matter that now there are more options for women beyond those two choices, and I think the more options we have, the better, because we all have different talents.” 

While she was reluctant to “to tie gender and competency to one another,” Combs applauded the women on the Kentucky Supreme Court. 

“They have good legal minds, they have a great work ethic, they’re collegial, they’re everything that a good judge should be. They just happen to be women,” Combs said. “I’m delighted that they haven’t been held back because of that fact, but I would prefer to emphasize the fact of their competence rather than their gender.”

When asked if the majority of women could be a sign of increasing diversity on the bench in the future, Combs said a diverse pool of judges is needed to review cases. 

“I hope it does, because our social problems are very diverse in nature and origin, and I think their solution will require some diversity of approach to how we solve these problems,” she said. 

Change takes time

Stumbo, who was the first woman elected to the Kentucky Supreme Court in 1993 and retired from the Court of Appeals in 2017, said that diversity on the bench — in terms of race and gender — is a change that happens over time. Kentucky judicial candidates are required to be a licensed attorney for some time before seeking election. A district judge requires two years while the Supreme Court requires eight years. 

Retired Justice Janet L. Stumbo stands beside her portrait, painted by artist Tona Barkley, following a dedication ceremony Dec. 6, 2023. The portrait joined others of justices in the corridors of the second floor of the Kentucky Capitol in Frankfort. (Photo by Brian Bohannon)

“The composition of the bar has changed greatly,” Stumbo said. “The number of women who are lawyers, the number of minorities who are lawyers, has increased dramatically, and that’s the way we’ll see more diversity on the bench.” 

Stumbo said that the majority of female justices shows that the electorate in Kentucky is also more accepting of women being in these high-ranking roles. 

“There’s definitely more work to be done, but women are succeeding and succeeding in ways that are getting them recognized as fine litigators and tenacious litigators and people that you’re proud to have representing you,” Stumbo said. 

Judge Goodwine speaks to supporters at her election night watch party in Lexington Nov. 5, 2024. (Kentucky Lantern photo by Arden Barnes)

Women would have won a majority of Kentucky Supreme Court seats no matter how the Nov. 5 election turned out. Goodwine’s opponent also was a woman, Lexington attorney Erin Izzo.

Goodwine echoed those sentiments. She said that each justice on the court “carries unique perspectives and experiences” and that it’s imperative that younger generations see themselves reflected in the highest levels of the judiciary. She said that many have “expressed gratitude to me for being a trailblazer helping to forge a path for others to follow in my footsteps in their chosen profession, and that increases my drive and dedication to ensure that our justice system reflects our community.” 

“This new chapter for our court affirms the progress we have made and also challenges us to move forward with purpose and conviction,” Goodwine said. “We honor the legacy of our forerunners by continuing to uphold the principles of fairness, justice and equality for all. It is a responsibility I take to heart, and I look forward to working with my esteemed colleagues to protect the rights and uphold the dignity of everyone in our state ensuring that the Kentucky Supreme Court is a beacon of justice for all.” 

[neon-vocalist]

Are you an alter in a system? Is the host or another alter in your system kind of in hell rn and struggling to take care of themselves? Here’s a list of shit you can do to help them out. Body care edition.

First up. Get in the damn shower. If that’s all you’ve got in you, great! Bask in the warm water and enjoy your chill time, it’s still a good way to refresh. But while you’re in there, if you feel up to it…

Wash your hair with shampoo and/or put conditioner in it.

Use a sugar scrub or other exfoliant on your body, especially back, chest, and joints— this one’s especially good if you’ve been struggling to wash up lately.

On that note, wash your body with soap! If you don’t have a soft towel in arm’s reach, just slap it on there with your hands. Still does the job.

Wash your face.

Shave if you’re into that.

Wash your feet, ears, and neck— commonly forgotten places!

Maybe shampoo your hair again if you haven’t done so in a while.

Run the water cold at the end to theoretically benefit your hair, skin, and mood.

Once you’re out of the shower, you can do other body care stuff. For example—

Brush your teeth!

Maybe even floss them!

Use mouthwash if you want!

Use whatever skincare products you like and/or have on hand.

Use lotion in a scent you enjoy.

Use body spray or perfume in a scent you enjoy.

Use deodorant. Measure with the soul.

Brush or detangle your hair.

Style it or use a hair product if you feel so inclined.

Put on some chapstick or use a lip scrub.

Short section on medical care.

Take prescription meds if you have any.

Take Tylenol or other OTC stuff if you find you need it.

I find this one extremely important— clean and cover any applicable wounds on the body.

Get dressed in an outfit that’s comfortable and / or makes you happy. Now you can worry about stuff like food and drink.

Firstly, drink some water or any other beverage of choice. Caffeine is fine, sugar is fine, it doesn’t matter, it’ll still get SOME amount of water in you.

Then…

- If your host hasn’t been eating much or has been eating food that’s more quick & comforting than technically “healthy”— make or get a meal or snack with a focus on nutrition. Protein, plants, whatever.

- If your host has been eating the same stuff every day— make or get a meal or snack with a focus on variety. Colours! Textures! Tastes! Etc.

- Just generally, if your host or any of you have been down lately— make or get a meal or snack with a focus on comfort. Maybe something you’ve loved since you were little, or something you discovered more recently. Something that reminds you of someone or something you love. Just something to get your spirits up.

Finally, regardless— make or get yourself a little treat. You deserve it.

[benevolenterrancy]

redraw of that ds9 scene

LBH doesn't understand what's going on but wants to impress shizun; MBJ understands it even less but is optimistic about any sport involving a solid wooden bludgeon at least

[aidontdraw]

I think we need to cut Naruto some slack when it comes to him perpetuating the system he grew up in. Naruto shows the most realistic way of dismantling a system in fiction. It's not a Dystopain YA Novel where after the hero kills the bad dictator everything magically gets better. It's a complex series that shows the harsh realities of systems like this.

One thing we have to remember when considering Naruto being the Hokage, is that while he is "perpetuating the cycle" of hatred, it's still the best option. Naruto is actively dismantling the shinobi system as Hokage. By maintaining peace with the other villages, the shinobi system is dying, and we know this from the final chapter.

Tenten can not make a profit selling ninja tools. With the symbolism we get throguh out the series that ninja are tools of war. We're bassicly being told there is no need for shinobi any more.

Naruto can not break the Cycle of Hatred with violence, if that worked, the cycle would have been over centuries ago. The same way Rome was not built in a day, it wasn't destroyed in a day either. You can not destroy a system quickly, especially since this violence is their primary source of income. They need to slowly transition these ninja into other job fields. Otherwise, you just get the Akatsuki again.

I think we forget, Naruto technically grew up in a time of peace. The Thrid Shinobi war ended a year before he was born, and all the villages chose to do a disarmament. However, that just created more problems. With out a steady streem income coming in, villages had to go to extreme measures. Some where on the break of failing, and all of their people literally dying.

Powerful shinobi, like Zabuza & all the members of the Akatsuki didn't have any income from their villages coming in. So Zabuza had to work with the Demon Brothers in order to put food on his plate. Like yeah, we could argue that he could have just gotten a job at non-Ninja McDonald's. But he's essentially a war veteran at age 15, with no other marketable skills than war. His best option for money was to use his skills to further captalisim.

The Akatsuki was able to rise in power because the villages could no longer afford to raise the type of Ninja required for certain missions any more. It became cheeper and more effective to hire the Akatsuki than to hire ninja from a village.

80,000 shinobi fought in the Fourth Ninja War, 10,000 died, that leaves us with roughly 70,000. That's just ninja from the Five Great Villages, there are ninja from other villages. This means if Ninjas as an occupation were to magically end that's at least 70,000 people who need to find new jobs, not including all of the industries who create the tools to support the military complex. This sudden ending could cause a massive issue toppling economy. And, boo-hoo the economy, except that's how people gain the resources they require to live.

In Gaara's book, we read that Suna doesn't even have adequate maternity wings in their hospital and their people struggle to eat after the Fourth Shinobi War. We are forced to sit with the reality of what a failing system actually means to its people. Because of how isolated Suna is we can only assume it gets worse. I'm suprised they even exist in Boruto with how bad we're told it is.

Then we have to consider the cultural loss. These people will lose their connection to their culture. Techniques will have no more use to be passed down. Yes, these techniques are murder, but they are still thousand year old traditions that will no longer exist. Which is sad.

Theres also the potential of more genocide, it's what happened after the Thrid Shinobi War. Essentially, the clans realized they wernt getting paid by the villages any more and started gaining outside power again. Because the village system was only 50ish years old at that point, it was relatively easy. Unfortunately it put a target on their backs, and they were genocided. So that's another fear you have to work with with dismantling this system. Some people like the system and want it to continue, so they can make money to live.

In Boruto, we see they aren't even having kids at replacement levels. Each character, besides Naruto, bassicly has one kid. If we think about Sasukes goal to revitalize his clan, how's he going to do that with only one child. What we can assume is, they know the systems dying, so they aren't bothering to make enough kids to fill that system.

Naruto is dismantling the system, it just takes time and has a lot of moving parts. He's only been Hokage for 3-5 years at the start of Boruto. It's barely long enough to make any significant change.

Naruto is also only 33. That is incredibly young. Like insany young. Like he's not even old enough to be president of the United States of America young. So he had a long road ahead of him to make the changes he wanted to see in the world.

Thinking about Naruto

The day you realize Naruto and all his friends are child soldiers being raised by child soldiers— you aren’t watching the same show twice anymore. The cycle of violence never ends because you raise child soldiers to forfeit their humanity in a nationalist society.

Don’t get me wrong— as Naruto gets older and understands more— he is able to break pieces of that cycle. He never escapes it though.

Naruto was a leader amongst his peers because he didn’t comply with apathy. Naruto let his empathy guide him throughout the world. In the society he lives in— empathy is a radical concept.

When you really think about the values the shinobi world drills into their citizens: unemotional, lethal force, and nationalism— Naruto’s desire to see others and understand them is defiant of those values.

Naruto’s capacity and willingness to see others as individuals first and strive to understand, and then see them as from another nation second separates him from the rest. Naruto’s empathy and love for humanity gives him the ability for open dialogue with people he thought of as enemies (Zabuza, Haku, Nagato, Gaara). He is able to cry for his enemies ( again— zabuza, haku, gaara, and sasuke). He is has the capacity for forgiveness and growth. Through these radical (in this society) concepts of empathy, understanding, forgiveness— Naruto changed people for the better. He changed his nation for the better.

He never breaks free though. Naruto becomes the hokage and continues the cycle. His village still raises child soldiers (in less harsh values)— he promotes incorporating empathy and extending your understanding outside of your own nation. The violence still continues. He still facilitates a violence society in raising these child soldiers— he is not the only one— gaara and the other kages are right along with him.

The show feels very different when you realize that Kakashi was a victim of a system that raised victims of a system— that went on to raise more victims of a system. The show feels different. Suddenly it’s not just a shonen battle anime with bright colors and cool concepts. It becomes thought provoking and reflects realities of a society and continuous cycles. Brilliant writing. Dark and layered undertones.