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hey! i love your posts! i was wondering if you could possibly do an analysis on the infamous bathroom scene? why does kaz choose this time to get close to inej and help her with her bandages? do you think he went in with the intention to try and give her physical affection or did it just happen? why does he choose to kiss her neck and is there significance to that? no rush, but i’d love to hear your thoughts!
Thanks so much for your question! I know you said I rush but it really has been a long time so I’m so sorry this took forever, but let’s go!
So the bathroom scene begins very specifically parallel with one of the earliest scenes of Six of Crows, when Kaz is washing in his room at the Slat and Inej walks in to deliver him news, and I think this is supposed to give us a sense of finality. It increases the tension, because at this point the reader is very aware that not everyone is necessarily going to survive Kaz's plan and having this echo could therefore look something frighteningly like closure to prepare us for losing one or both of the pair. Now this can be interpreted as a red herring, Leigh Bardugo is the queen of hitting where the mark’s not looking and she feeds us a lot of red herrings to hide her actual foreshadowing (I made a post about it a while ago now but in summary she’s a genius), and this could definitely be an extension of that to draw attention away from Matthias, similarly to how she focuses on the possibility of Matthias losing Nina a lot more than she does Nina losing Matthias, or it could be a hark back to Inej looking at the murals of animals running in circles in Six of Crows, describing them as “destined to chase each other for as long as the Ice Court stood” (or along those lines sorry I don’t have my books with me at the minute) as a metaphor for her and Kaz’s relationship. I think that the cyclical nature of this scene is meant to reference that in order to suggest that actually they have found a way to break the cycle, because they succeeded at the Ice Court, they metaphorically brought it down and so the cycle is broken, and the fact that there are several distinct differences between these parallel scenes enhances that for me.
This scene is only given to us in detail from Kaz's POV, whereas the early scene is from Inej's, and in each case the opposite character is arguably in the more vulnerable appearing position. In the first scene Kaz is shirtless, washing blood off himself, and Inej is actively discomforted by the immodesty of the interaction between them. In the bathroom scene, Inej has removed her tunic and I believe is wearing a tank top, which for her is a massively vulnerable way to be seen because she covers most of her skin all the time - particularly her arms because of her scars from the removal of the Menagerie tattoo. By this point the scars has been removed by Nina when she was high on parem, but that doesn't make Inej's psychological connection to them end and it definitely doesn't decrease her feeling of vulnerability when her skin is on show. There's also the added tension of Inej being injured in this scene. Although both scenes are in the aftermath of danger, the bathroom scene has a far stronger sense of the further danger to come than the earlier one did, since at the time we knew so little of the heist and the plan. Inej's injury solidifies this and makes the danger feel constant and real, as well as intensely increasing her vulnerability in a way that she is very aware of.
The fact that Kaz chooses now to get close to her intensifies this sense of danger and makes the reader very aware that Kaz Brekker, the Bastard of the Barrel, the man we have witnessed successfully breaking in and out of the Ice Court, cutting out a man's eye, scaring a small child so badly she'll probably need therapy as an adult, murdering, thieving, and being so committed to his plans that he swallowed and regurgitated a set of lockpicks without a second thought, is actually, genuinely terrified that he won't come back from the next stage of his plan. In fact he's so terrified that he has decided to face the only other thing that frightens him, so that if he dies today at least he tried. I'm not sure if he went in with the intention of moving from helping her with the bandages to physical intimacy, because even the bandages alone would be a huge step for him. It's possible that once he'd committed to helping her with the bandages anyway, that he decided to push himself as far as possible in case he never got another chance. Possibly if he'd taken things in smaller steps he would have been able to cope with helping her today, and then know that he could help her again, and maybe one day after that he'll be able to kiss her. But one of the things that makes this moment so beautiful is that this is a snippet of time where Kaz and Inej are the only thing that exist, there is no future and if they try hard enough maybe there can be no past, maybe there can just be the present, there can just be this. Kaz takes these steps now becasue he doesn't see a chance to do it again, and although this does wonders to enhance the importance and the beauty of the scene it is also terrifying as a reader to face the very real possibility of Kaz not coming back.
I’m really glad you mentioned him kissing her neck because I do think it’s possibly symbolic and quite meaningful. Whilst both of them struggle with physical contact to different capacities, it’s important to note that whilst Kaz’s fear of contact has made intimacy a seeming impossibility for him, for Inej it’s intimacy itself that’s the biggest influence on her pain. She struggles with any contact she isn’t prepared for beforehand, but only ever finds it worth explaining when it’s a form of intimacy - “the first time Nina hugged me, I flinched”. Even though Inej consents in the scene and doesn’t, at least not vocally or physically and therefore not to the reader’s knowledge, change her mind, she never initiates anything. I think this is important because it forces Kaz to be the one who handles the initial contact; if she touched him skin-on-skin without him forcing himself to do so first then he probably would have shut down and panicked a lot sooner because he wasn’t in control. But he also shows such an important understanding that Inej also needs some level of control. And that control comes in her decision to return the kiss. If he kissed her lips she would be forced to face the prospect of her worst fear “would she kiss him back? Could she be herself in such a moment or […] a doll in his arms, a girl who would never quite be whole”. (Again, sorry, operating on memory alone for the quotes). By kissing her neck, Kaz is able to create this moment of sensuality without taking control of it any more than he needs to for his own sake, making sure that the choice always remains hers. It also makes me think of when Nina kisses Matthias on the neck whilst searching his pockets for parem, when she says that she didn’t kiss his lips because she would not let the drug take that from her. Leigh Bardugo establishes this kiss on the lips as something powerful early on in the book and it comes into play once again here, with Kaz and Inej acknowledging that kind of connection to be a far more symbolic one for them than an initial contact is. In much the same way that Kaz refused to be the one to mark Inej again, he will not be the one to kiss her lips and create a situation she is unprepared to deal with. Ultimately, he has to be able to touch her skin first, and she has to be able to kiss his lips first.
Ok I wasn't one hundred percent sure how I was going to go about this and then suddenly all of that was on the page, but I think what I'm going to do now is pick some specific quotes or moments from the scene to talk about.
"I don't have the words to thank you" "I'm sure the Suli have a thousand proverbs for such an occasion" "words have not been invented for such an occasion" "if I end up on the gallows you can say something nice over the corpse" - honestly not sure if I have anything to say about this I just love this conversation so damn much
"if that were true my shadow would have put Ketterdam in permananent night" "maybe. or maybe your someone else's shadow" "You mean Pekka" - I feel like I talk about Kaz being Pekka's shadow an awful lot but I am just so obsessed with the idea, they are literary foils but there are also such important distinct differences between them it’s just incredible
“I don’t sell girl into brothels, I don’t con helpless kids out if their money” “look at the floor of the crow club, Kaz,” - okay so of the same vein and again I feel like I talk about it a lot, in fact it’s literally what inspired the entire fic im writing (if you wanna read it all the chapters are tagged under “Maya Olsen oc”) but these lines are so goddamn heartbreaking I will never get over them
“How could she still look at the world that way?” - it’s just really interesting to me to have this direct address of comparison of the way their view has been shaped by their experiences, particularly as I’ve talked a lot about Inej having to come to terms with the idea that what happened to her isn’t just a cruel part of the world but an individual piece of a cruel world especially with seeing the “Rare Spices” billboard using hyper-sexualised Suli women to sell the products (I made a whole post on that too) and yet still she sees hope in the world. A lot of this I think is to do with her faith, because instead of believing that there can be no god or saints or other form of deity because of the cruelty in the world, as Kaz does (it’s confirmed that he prayed as a child but is obviously now very atheistic, though we don’t get a lot of detail about what religion he may or may not have practiced), a big part of Inej’s path to hell by is believing that fate planned this for her so that it would lead her to stopping it from happening to others. I struggle with this idea because it seems to imply that it makes her pain worthy of going through when obviously no-one should ever have to experience such trauma, but there are many different ways of interpreting this and personally I don’t think that Inej believes her Saints did this to her for a reason but that she believes they have found a reason for her to continue after after the fact and given her a cause in order to help her through her experiences. I hope this makes sense it’s starting to feel a bit ramble-y
Oh my god I just wrote loads after that and it didn’t save. Oh my god no I can’t believe it I’ve been writing for so long 😭 ok erm… oh god I’m so annoyed right now I can’t remember everything I wrote and it was so much like I’d nearly got to the end of the chapter doing a quote by quote analysis. Ok I’m going to try and reconstruct what I did but please bare with if this isn’t my best work because usually I write very freely when I do these and just throw whatever comes into my head into the page so cautiously trying to think back to what I said originally might make it come across a bit stilted.
I can’t believe I’ve done this 😭
“The distance between them felt like nothing. It felt like miles” - his internal conflict is so brilliantly written and it’s so heartbreaking; the way this is far too close but it’s much too far away
“Graceful as always. A girl underwater” - again this internal conflict, the way she’s underwater because her movements are fluid but she’s also underwater because to touch her it to drown
“His gloves lay discarded […] they looked like dead animals”
“Maybe he would never get to the Slat. Maybe this would kill him.”
“Inej’s eyes were wide and dark. Lost planets. Black moons” - I will never shut up about the fact that soc starts with Joost wishing Anya had blue eyes instead of brown so they were easier to compliment, and then the two books are absolutely overflowing with Kaz and Inej describing each other’s beautiful brown eyes
“It’s shame that eats men whole. He was drowning it. Drowning in the Ketterdam harbour”
“Even now a boy will smile at me on the street, or Jesper will put his arm around my waist, and I feel I’m going to vanish,” - this is such and important moment, this scene is the most vulnerable and open Inej ever is out loud and I think it’s such a massive concession to her trust in Kaz. I think that, especially because the scene is written from Kaz’s perspective, we get a lot more emphasis on his struggle than on Inej’s and although it’s really important to discuss Kaz I do think that sometimes we tread a thin line of focusing on him at the expense of losing focus on Inej and it’s so massively important to acknowledge both of them. This is also one of the things that I think was the biggest downfall of the way the writing in shadow and bone season 2 treated Inej, although I absolutely adore the show and I think that everything Amita Suman does shows that she understands the character in a deep and beautiful level, I also think it’s so so important to realise that not once in either season does that script actually state that the Menagerie is a brothel. One of my friends who hasn’t read the books didn’t get the full picture of Inej’s backstory until I filled in some small gaps for her because the writing just didn’t do her full justice, and I think that’s really unfortunate not least because it means that to some who hasn’t read the books a lot of Inej’s actions in season 2 would come across as her trying rush Kaz into something he isn’t ready for when that isn’t the situation in the slightest
“The room tilted. He clung to the tether of her voice” - I’ve seen a lot of stuff online about the focus points of contact between grishaverse couples and the way their represented, for example with Malina it’s their hands (the way they hold hands as Alina is grabbed by Volcra and it amplifies her power, the way they reach to intertwine their fingers in the meadow, etc). And most of these label the eyes as Kanej’s focal point of contact, and whilst I agree with that I also think that the voice is a massively underrepresented one, especially from Kaz’s perspective. It’s Inej’s voice that helps him work through his panic attack in soc and it’s Inej’s voice that keeps him afloat now, arguably because it’s a form of connection between them that requires no closeness or input, it just exists and can be relied upon.
“I live in fear that I’ll see one of her… one of my clients on the street. For a long time I thought I recognised them everywhere. But sometimes I think what they did to me wasn’t the worst of it” - okay I want to warn you guys now I wrote a long and in depth analysis on this quote and I was incredibly passionate and very proud of it so I’n really really annoyed it didn’t save, and I’m sorry because my analysis now is probably not going to live up to what I wrote earlier but here we go:
For me, this is a massively important quote and there are two ways to read it. Firstly, that when she refers to “her” Inej means Heleen but edits her words as a continuation of this vulnerability she is forcing herself to share. The second is going to link to something I said a while ago about how we could compare a separation of “Inej” and “The Wraith” to the separation of “Kaz” and “Dirtyhands”, but this is a bit more like the separation of “Rietveld” and “Brekker”. Inej talks a lot about how she would leave her body behind to exist only in her mind, in passages I find particularly reminiscent of passages in The Handmaid’s Tale (although please note soc is not very explicit whereas tht is incredibly explicit). But to take that idea further, I think there are certain hints, and I think this is possibly the biggest one, to imply that one of Inej’s ptsd responses it to actually view herself today as a separate entity from who she was during her indenture, effectively saying ‘yes these things happened to this body but they didn’t happen to this mind so that should make it easier’ to herself, which is massively self-destructive in nature because it almost creates this idea that she needs to get over who she once was and move on, very similar to the way Kaz Brekker represses Kaz Rietveld. Arguably, what she’s saying is the worst of it is this fracturing of the self that has been created by what they put her through and that she cannot seem to escape from. Now obviously I don’t know the intent behind Leigh Bardugo’s words and I want to be very clear that there are different possible interpretations of this, this one in particular does happen to more darkly resonate with her ptsd that does not make it correct or incorrect but I think it’s worth considering, especially when it adds another layer to the parallels between her and Kaz.
Ok I’m not going to write out the full quote because it’s quite long but starting from the line “Tante Heleen wasn’t always cruel” - now I talked about this a bit in my post about a comparison between Inej and Wylan as subsequent to a comparison between Heleen and Van Eck, but very specifically in this passage Inej describes this horrifying, heart-shattering image of the way Heleen attempted to instil something akin to Stockholm Syndrome within the girls at the Menagerie, by forcing them to believe that she was their only hope for survival, that she was kinder to them than anyone else would be, that they had to prove they deserved to stay with her, that any abuse she brought down on them came from a place of some kind of twisted love or care because she had to do this to make them understand, that if they would just be good and if they would just understand then she wouldn’t have to hurt them but they won’t do they are forcing her to do this. It’s so painful and it tells us so much detail about Inej’s experience without actually going into tiny explicit details.
“Feeling regret and release as he broke contact with her skin” - again so brilliantly highlighting his internal conflict
“He could feel the warmth of her on his fingers like fever” - if I had a list of my favourite similes in literature… well it would be very long, but this would be on it!!! The subtlety and yet emphasis on Kaz’s internal conflict is so beautifully written here, with the warmth of her flesh against his creating this sensual atmosphere but the comparison of it to fever, to the illness that killed Jordie and took Kaz to the Reaper’s Barge, adds to the way the reminder of his pain is threaded through every moment even when he isn’t physically suffering a flashback, it’s just constantly present and inescapable
“That rapid pulse fluttering in her throat. Alive. Alive. Alive” - agaiiiiiiiiiiiin with the so brilliantly written internal conflict I will never get over. The entire scene is at war with itself, every sentence at odds with its own content. The sexual tension created in the image of the fast heart rate and the way this makes you feel alive versus the desperate need to keep reminding himself that she is alive and breathing she is not a body on the Reaper’s Barge.
Ohhhhh just the whole description of Kaz saying “after all she’d endured, he was the weak one” and explaining the pain of watching the others able to hold each other, how difficult it is to see Nina hug her and Jesper out his arm around her genuinely makes me want to cry, it resonates so sadly with the scene when they arrive at the Geldrenner and all the others are hugging and so happy to see each other alive, and Nina says that even if Kaz isn’t happy to see them they’re happy to see him, meanwhile Kaz is in a war of self loathing because he so intensely fears that they hate him because they think he hates them but he has no way of expressing himself and it’s just ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, you know?
“He watched that pulse, the evidence of her heart”
The whole passage that follows this moment I can’t explain it any other way than I feel like I’m melting every time I read it. I saw a Tumblr post someone had put on Pinterest recently and if I find it again I’ll put the op username in the comments but it basically said that when a writer can write something that isn’t a sex scene as if it’s a sex scene that it’s kind of magical and I think in a lot of ways this resonates massively with this scene
Ugh and then I want to cry again when he can’t cope and the I ability to express himself becomes anger and becomes descriptions of violence. This is the only time we get a full feel for the absolute unending mess of Kaz’s theist for revenge; it’s never enough, not the banks, not the attorneys, not the man from the cafe, not the boy who lured them in, not Margit, not Saskia, and Pekka Rollins won’t be. I always wonder if it’s important that we’re never told what he did to Saskia. We know that the roper was tortured and left dead with “the key to a wind up dog shoved down his throat” so we know Kaz exercises some kind of poetic justice in his violence, and we see that in his revenge against Rollins too. Maybe he strangled her with a red hair ribbon. Maybe he never actually hurt her. Maybe he couldn’t bring himself to.
“You don’t ask for forgiveness Kaz. You earn it,” “and is that what you intend to do? By hunting slavers?” “By hunting slavers” - maybe it’s just because of the intonation choice on my audiobook (which btw is awesome shout out to the narrators of the audiobook love you guys) but this to me comes across as Kaz attempting to mock Inej in his harried, terrified, clearly losing control state and her so calmly standing her ground and standing by what she believes in
“His eyes scanned her face […] snatching at the pieces of her like the thief he was”
“But if he was going to die today maybe the one thing he’d earned was the memory of her, brighter than anything he would ever have a right to, to take with him to the other side.”
The way the last moments of the scene include him putting back in the gloves, reconstructing the armour
“He might as well go to meet his death in style” - this is gonna be out of tune with everything else I’ve said but damn what an icon love this line
“Whatever happens to me, survive this city. Get your ship, have your vengeance, carve your name into their bones, but survive this mess I’ve gotten us into.” - I may simply ✨cease to exist✨. But genuinely I’ve mentioned several times before about how the city of Ketterdam almost becomes it’s own character as the antagonist because ultimately it’s the system, not any individual, that has to be defeated and I think this quote highlights it so well. There are individual people that have to be dealt with and deserve everything that will be brought done upon them, but it’s the city itself that you have to watch out for or it will swallow you whole
I’m not going to go into detail about their tells because I’ve made a post devoted to them before and good lord this post is getting long, but I just want to emphasise that it’s a brilliant passage
“If you’ve ever cared about me at all, don’t follow” - I just absolutely adore that the next chapter starts with Inej following him mimicking these exact words I love her so damn much it makes giggle every time
“Inej was wrong about one thing. He knew exactly what he intended to leave behind when was gone: Damage” - *collapses* God I adore this there are no words
Ok wow if you made it this far thank you so much for reading this honestly I’m very impressed that you did because this is long. There are definitely details that I’ve lost because I had to require so much of it, which is a real shame but there’s still a lot to talk about here and I’ve written so much is possibly best for the sake of all our sanity’s that there isn’t more. Sorry I took so long to respond to your question but thank you so so much for asking it, I hope you all like this and that it at least made some sense because as I’ve said before these things often make more sense in my own head than they do on paper. Thanks for reading 💖
#this may actually be *too* long#is there a point when it becomes unreasonable?#I was going to make a joke about my Roman Empire but I don’t think any of you needed telling that it was these beautiful novels#they actually just consume me#grishaverse#six of crows#leigh bardugo#crooked kingdom#inej ghafa#kaz brekker#nina zenik#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#matthias helvar#kanej#I’ve been in a very kanej mood recently#live laugh love kanej#kanej has my whole heart#kanej bathroom scene#ck bathroom scene#kanej brainrot#*cries in kanej*#dk's grishaverse asks answered
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What a terribly dull ending this is.
#a lil manga redraw I did quite some time ago#sebaciel#kuroshitsuji#black butler#ciel phantomhive#sebastian michaelis#my art#redraw#sorry for not posting for so long again life's been kinda crazy on me last couple months#for good and for worse ig#good news is I may be opening commissions soon💋#bad news I (got) dropped out of university🥀#can't say I hadn't seen it coming#just need to keep myself busy with something but can't find it in myself to look for an ACTUAL job outside of freelance for now...#too scary...
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Hero of the Deep 🌊🐟
#jrwi#jrwi fanart#gillion tidestrider#jrwi riptide#hades game#hades 2#hades fanart#THIS TOOK ME. WAY TOO LONG TO MAKE#I STARTED IT LAST FUCKING MAY#also ive never actually played hades lmao sorry if the textbox is wrong
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He is not one of us🎵
He has never been one of us~🎶
Have Amethio without all the lighting and effects too! Just because I'm pretty happy with how the hair turned out and you can't really appreciate it in the final version haha
#Pokemon Anime#Anipoke#Pokeani#Pokemon Horizons#Amethio#pkmnart#Explorers#Hamber#Coral#Sango#Sidian#Onyx#Spinel#Chalce#Agate#Gibeon#my art#// idk why after watching HZ065 that song from Lion King 2 popped up in my head and never left ksdjalk#this took way too long to finish because I kept getting sick but I hope you like it! I'm excited to see Amethio's journey continue :>#also I actually drew full busts for the Explorers here because I didn't know how much of them I was going to show#so I may post them separately at a later time! maybe in a few days#anyway happy end of the year!
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SOLDIER, POET, KING by The Oh Hellos
#star wars#swedit#starwarsedit#leia organa#han solo#luke skywalker#*mine#*mygifs#so i actually only like leia's but ! i spent way too long on this edit not to post it#i wanted to put the scene where han says may the force be with you for his but he kept looking like way too orange and it was funky#also i made leia's first and it kind of looks too bright compared to the other two#but it's actually symbolism bc she's the light of my life and i am giving her a kiss on the forehead <3#in retrospect i could've just made the edit black and white so it's sort of more coherent but i really liked the coloring for leia#*500#*1k
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Talia took a 20+ Year Undercover mission a while ago
So! Talia is the Daughter of Ra's Al Ghul, and has been alive and at his side for many years now. Decades even. She is well into her 100's, even though her physical Body looks like that of a 20 yr old.
And in all the years that she has lived, what's to say she didn't take a few years off as a vacation? Even Ra's must take a few years off every once in a while, leaving to spend time on some remote island he can relax on for once. So, one day in the Early 80's she decided to do the same.
But she wouldn't be completely relaxing, she would take the break to further the League's goals still. She decided to Dye her Hair, change her Name, get into an acceptable College, and study Lazarus Waters to their scientific limit. She decided to name if Ectoplasm, to avoid any unwanted attention.
And while there, she met a pair of men doing the exact same.
Jack and Vladimir were nice enough. Although their Research was more focused on Ghosts, or as she would call them, Pit Demons. They were convinced that Ectoplasm and Ghosts came from another Dimension, and if they could find a way to open a Dimension Gateway to this theoretical Ghost Zone, they could aquire Limitless Clean Energy (and maybe find a way to contain the Ghostly threat).
Over the years, Talia Maddie would fall for Jack. Eventually, even after she had completed her College Studies and Vlad had left contact with them, she decided to extend her Vacation to further study Ectoplasm with Jack. One thing led to another, and eventually she found herself pregnant. And then it happened again.
Jazzmine and Daniel were the cutest little babies. But she knew the danger they would be in if it was ever discovered that she was their Mother, so she trained them in everything she could so they could survive. She knew her time as Maddie Fenton was coming short, but she resolved to stay, at the very least until Jazz was an Adult.
She didn't account for Daniel becoming a Small Town Hero, but those were just the Trials of motherhood.
Then, the day came. She left a note on her bedside table explaining that she regretted what had to happen, and left in the middle of the night. It was better this way.
...
The year right after she returned, her Father forced her to have a Child with his most prospective Heir. The Bat, he called himself. Oh he was Charming, there was no denying that, but unfortunately she was still working through her feelings about Jack.
She treated her resulting child poorly because of that, and that she regreted it deeply. She loved him, honestly she did, but it was hard to look at him and not remember Daniel. Still, she persevered.
The day she once again had to give up her son for his protection was the hardest of her life.
But it was unavoidable. The Coup that had taken her Father's life had also fractured the Organization, anyone could have taken their shot at her Son as the rightful Heir. She needed to protect him as she took care of the Traitors.
...
Damian always knew he was the One True Heir. It was his defining character trait for his early years of life. Even though he had grown to be more than just that over recent years, he always felt like it was a key part of his identity.
Until now.
Because the BatComputer had just finished running a DNA Test on the Blood of a man who he had spotted on his Patrol the previous night.
A DNA Test that had come back, with results claiming that the man, who looked almost exactly like a younger male version of his Mother, was his Half Brother.
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#Talia Al Ghul#Jack Fenton#Maddie Fenton#Talia Al Ghul is Maddie Fenton#She went on an Undercover Mission/Vacation to scientifically study Lazarus Water#She met Jack and Vlad in the College she was undercover at#She fell for Jack and his Himbo attitude#She knew that Danny was a Ghost/Pit Demon but decided to test if he had actually remembered any of her self defense lessons#She got Jack to agree to it#She will admit she may have gone a step too far (the threats over dinner were a bit much)(so was keeping the act up for so long)#Danny was 16 when she left an 17 when she had Damian#Jazz was 18 when she left and 19 when she had Damian#Currently Danny is 29 and Jazz is 31#They never did figure out where their mother went#But they will never forgive her for what she did to her Dad#Jack was heartbroken#He still is#He got better over time but it took a while to begin to heal
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ranting for a bit because the entire scene where elphaba tells glinda her secret makes me go rabid and actually makes me want to chew concrete because not only is it actually absolutely heartbreaking to see just how deeply elphaba believes all the horrible things her father reinforces; how she thinks she's responsible for her mother's death and is the reason for nessarose's disability even when it's literally not her fault in any way and is actually DIRECTLY her father's fault.
and just the fact that elphaba tells glinda all this and tells glinda her father hates her and that everything's her fault and glinda looks at her and she's absolutely heartbroken to hear elphaba saying all these things and she becomes the first person in elphaba's life to look her in the eyes and tell her that none of that is true and that it is NOT her fault, it was NEVER her fault despite whatever anyone said.
ik a lot of ppl see glinda's "it was the milkflower's fault" line as a very sort of shallow take by glinda (I'm explaining it poorly but ik some ppl wonder why she didn't just call out governor thropp directly) but I've got to disagree with that take because personally I think glinda heard elphaba talking, heard her describe her secret and heard how her father forced her mother to chew milkflowers constantly during her pregnancy all because he was afraid the baby would come out green like elphaba and she heard all this and she hears how elphaba thinks this is all her fault.
and yk they're roommates. glinda sees the way elphaba talks about her father and how even though she says that he hates her in an almost casual manner despite how she says he's justified for hating her, elphaba still loves her father and she still wants to do right by him and she still wants him to love her.
so glinda knows that elphaba will not listen to her if she straight up tells her that her father's fucking mental and completely wrong and that it was all his fault and that she's probably going to bludgeon him to death. she knows that elphaba will never accept this and she knows that right now it won't do any good for anyone.
so instead she tells elphaba it was the milkflower's fault. and she looks her in the eyes and she tells her this was never your fault you shouldn't think this was ever your fault and anyone who ever told you that it was your fault was completely and totally wrong and I need you to know this.
because the primary concern isn't about telling elphaba she's got a shitty dad the primary concern is telling elphaba that it is not her fault for simply existing. and to let her know that there is nothing wrong with her and that there is someone here, right now, who loves and cares for her so so much and wants her to know that. that there is someone who will hold her hand and who will tell her that they are there for her and that she is fine the way she is. that she is loved.
#wicked 2024#wicked#CHOWDAH THINKING ABOUT GLINDA AND ELPHABA FOR TOO LONG GOT ME FEELIN UNWISE#honestly without kidding#major props to ariana grande and cynthia erivo's acting#the tiny details make everything honestly#like the changes in facial expression and the way their voices change and all#10/10 we love to see it#makes me go feral#i will actually never stop thinking about it#and will just go analyze this shit for the rest of my life#but it's fine it's fine#dw about it ill be fine#i have to go to bed#but what about my 40000 page essay on them yk#glinda upland#elphaba thropp#gelphie#i despise the thought that glinda's vapid and stupid honestly#because we are consistently shown that that is not the case#she may be airheaded at times and she is extremely privileged which leads to her being shallow at times#but she is NOT stupid or unaware#we are clearly shown how she notices things and picks up on things#and IK she very clearly sees the complicated relationship elphaba has with her father#and she sees how vulnerable elphaba is being with her#and she decides to reassure her#because that's what she NEEDS rn#but she is going to sneak out later and kill governor thropp#that is a side quest for later yk
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hey devo!!! random anon here to ask if u have a ref of your sona 🤲🤲 they seem fun to draw and i have the urge to draw you holding your ocs like theyre plushies to slam against the wall (out of affection? violence? both? who knows……)
hihi!!! this reminds me i really need to update my sona drawing in the intro post, its so crusty and my hair has grown longer. i drew an updated one so i'll also drop it here :D

also!!! thank u for wanting to draw my sona!! which literally is just me but yassified LOL oh and don't worry about putting me in these exact clothes...!! i tend to dress really basic then accessorize the hell out so even when i was drawing it myself it was quite tedious.............
#ask#anon#my art#these are actual clothes that i own and wear#well i dont have a shirt that says “PISS” on it but id love to#but i do have a blue ranglan babytee#long time followers may have actually seen it heh#the skirt is sooooo cute but i have to pull it down every two seconds...like sorry my [REDACTED] is too [REDACTED]#and i finally found fishnets with smaller grids#im semi-concerned that i'll have fishnet shaped tanlines LOL
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didnt have the time to do a full finished drawing, but i tried to keep up with my tradition for redrawing the same good bro day drawing ive done for 3 years already :')
(last year's, which also has links to prev years as well)
#feels like i havent drawn the boys in. forever. i missed them#kinda unrelated and i said this on twitter too but i think most of you guys here should hear it...#i know a lot of you have followed me since my early dmc days and i just wanted to take the chance to thank you#its crazy to me that ppl have known me for so long and the support means a lot to me#i know i havent posted a lot this year bc ive just been busy with work but im grateful you guys still stuck around. thank you :)#anyways back to actual tags#devil may cry#vergil(dmc)#dante(dmc)#allyart
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they’ve been cooked…. (PHIGHTING!)


Yea Twitter really liked these ones lmao, anyways the first one was for a trend and the second one is just a silly follow up to it LMAO
#I actually had a lot of fun with these#I’m trying out a bit more of a “clean” style (specifically for chibis and such) and I honestly really really like it#It’s much easier to do stuff like gradients plus it’s pretty simple and nice!#I’m also working on a bunch of mermaid au chibis as well so those should be out soon!#I am kind of tied in with comms though so it may be a bit before I get to them#but hopefully they shouldn’t take too long :3!#Anyways enjoy the SFOTH eggrolls and icedagger soup#You can purchase them for 2944838482939 bux at catshots Café :3c#art#artists on tumblr#phighting fanart#phighting!#digital art#roblox phighting#phighting roblox#phighting#phighting art#roblox#PHIGHTING#phighting icedagger#icedagger#icedagger phighting#darkheart phighting#venomshank#illumina#phighting darkheart#illumina phighting#darkheart#ghostwalker phighting#ghostwalker
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This dialogue has always baffled me. It is locked behind a 30 cunning check, which I think may be impossible to reach without cheats at this early stage in the game (?) but its implications are INSANE. Entirely too long tirade below the cut:
How could the darkspawn possibly know the plan? Does it have anything to do with darkspawn showing greater signs of intelligence (re: the Architect, the Messenger)? Awakening was being written before DAO came out — was this meant to tie into that?
Many people online have discussed that it may be a remnant of abandoned plot threads that paint loghain as more of a mustache-twirling villain, working with the darkspawn (either willingly or perhaps under their influence?) to make sure the signal fire doesn’t get lit. David Gaider explained at length that the Ostagar plotline and the Cailan/Loghain conflict were subject to numerous rewrites. And while it is true that there is no further dialogue to suggest that Loghain was working with the darkspawn as this dialogue implies, my next question is what were his men doing in the tunnels underneath the Tower of Ishal?
Even before I had seen this exact line, in my first playthrough I operated under the assumption that Loghain had purposefully sabotaged the Tower in order to place blame on the Grey Wardens (an already easy scapegoat given their very recent return from exile) once he inevitably quit the field. I never once thought that his decision to retreat from Ostagar was made in the heat of the moment — after all, why would Howe already be making moves on Highever if he thought that Cailan would be alive after the battle to punish him for it? And if it were the case that Loghain planned for Cailan to die at Ostagar, why would he allow the signal fire to be lit on time and still quit the field knowing that some of his men would see this as betraying the King, regardless of how good he was at being a leader? Was it just a very happy accident that the darkspawn overwhelming the Tower and delaying made him look less villainous to his own army? Why would he leave this up to chance when so much of his plan before this seems to be so carefully crafted?
Frankly speaking, much of the deeper DAO lore seems to be happy accidents — constant rewrites and abandoned plot threads coming together to create a genuinely interesting story where the truth is not easily identified. And honestly, I think it benefited greatly from this! The truth is messy, especially when there are this many players vying for power in some way or another.
Personally, I’m of the mind that dev-lore comes secondary to what actually makes it into the game, even when the devs had better ideas than what we got. Which is why it is so fascinating that this line still exists in game and yet is nearly impossible to obtain! Why does it still exist? Why is it so hard to obtain? What implications does it have on the greater plot?
I don’t necessarily have an interesting conclusion beyond the fact that I am still in awe at the reactivity of this game that is objectively pretty clunky and ugly by today’s standards. I love Loghain as a villain in part because he is so human, and as much as I enjoy the sequels I really think that he is one of the best antagonists of the entire series. I find it really interesting that his reputation is not entirely shredded to pieces by Inquisition, as some Ostagar vets still sing his praises, which just further drives home the point that he has the capacity for good AND evil! I mean hell, the whole game is about making sacrifices for the greater good. Couldn’t you still argue that that was what Loghain was doing (or at least thought he was doing)?
All of this being an entirely too-long wind up to say: fuck you Quartermaster Threnn. I know what I saw.
#i feel winded. is this too long? probably. i just really actually genuinely care about this ONE LINE OF DIALOGUE and i think its neat#realistically an inquisitor would not argue against threnn. but i am not the inquisitor and i just know my hofs would jump her ass for that#i also want to say that although this is canon to me……. the truth is rarely objective and i enjoy the idea that other people may not agree#with my assessment of this dialogue or loghain’s intentions. and that….is a wonderful thing#please dont be mean or weird about it though. this is pixels#dragon age#dragon age origins#dao#loghain mac tir#cailan theirin#alistair theirin#hero of ferelden#warden tabris#video#this is my tabris btw :DDDD she’s a smart girl!#thinking of doing a loghain companion run but ill be honest the selling out the alienage is pretty irredeemable lol#tabris might kill him for that. guess its dwarf time!
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Day 52
Today’s Board is:

Bugs when you lift up a rock, once again
(From TV episode 13C Autopsy Turvy Double Whammy Part 2)
#htf#happy tree friends#htf flippy#i know it technically hasn’t been too long since we’ve had a Flip board but like.#come on he’s just a silly lil guy#and like boards of him are kinda lacking so like whateva whateva#And besides I haven’t uploaded any boards from DW2 so I’m doin that today <333#anyways unrelated but like I do indeed really love Autopsy Turvy as a title#it’s cute and silly while also being a lil dark at the same time <33#Agree with the crew this was certainly a title that needed to exist#it does kinda make me wonder what exactly the episode would’ve been if it wasn’t a fake out#I wanna see Toothy and Cuddles’s adventures in the Treetown morgue#Actually that would be a good Halloween episode now that I think about it. They are costumed up at the beginning#and the tv series didn’t get a Halloween episode despite getting a Christmas episode#huh… *puts that in my back pocket*#like obviously I know Autopsy Turvy was never meant to be a real episode but like. Ya know I’m kinda thinking about what it coulda been now#I wonder if I’d be decent at writing that…. Hm…#Welp this got off topic and now I’m thinking of things I may or may not do in the future whoopsie doodle
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Been working on some first run Chou sprites for funsies, here’s a handful of the ones I’ve done so far
#keese draws#isat#new game+#comic siffrin#comicfrin#isat siffrin#I mainly just wanted to figure out how chou may express differently than normal siffrin#they are alas far less kitty cat </3#but yeah even in their first run they were generally much lower energy than siffrin mostly due to stress#they are less used to traveling for long periods of time along with the whole savior thing going on#and while they start off generally handling their timeloop situation well enough even by the time they get the second orb they’re Tired man#and after the incident where they lost their eye they’re So ready for this to be over#and they haven’t even hit the wall of their final boss fight yet it took them a long while to get through that for the first time#the main thing is that their party spended most of their journey far more underleveled#for most of the main fights they were able to scrape through since the crew did have some disproportionally powerful abilities earlier than#the isat party would have similar skills (like their first recruit is a full blown shield specialist)#but as they got further and further and the boss gimmicks got more specific and punishing it would get Much harder#in the fight where chou lost their eye they were stuck for Months the first run trying to find a way to squeak through the fight#in game terms basically trying to abuse the consistent rng seed to find a chain of actions that would let them win#long story short the boss basically acts as a harsh punish for their lack of a proper healer#it also for realsies kills people like. during the battle. so the margin for error is slim to none.#basically once it takes out someone it’ll continue to target them and it can’t have its intent redirected#and it’s resistant to all craft types until it’s about to and failed to perform the final blow attack#without going too much into the party comp and how they generally fight just know that even if they weren’t underleveled this would low key#hard counter them since their whole game plan is about redirecting damage and simply killing the enemy before it kills them#so during this first run this fight was actual hell for chou to figure out and poor bastard hadn’t even hit their worst wall yet 😔#anyways that was a whole ramble that had nothing to do with the actual post I’m making. whoops.#point is they’ve earned the right to be low energy and stressed as hell they were Not built to carry a rpg party
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“Haven’t You Noticed (I’m a Star)” from Steven Universe works so ridiculously well for Leo
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt headcanons#rottmnt leo#rise leo#listen it’s morning now and I haven’t slept so bear with me for the sudden unwarranted lyric analysis haha#a lotttt of the lyrics work so well for him#not even just the overall theme the words just work great#first lyric is literally ‘I can’t help it if I make a scene’ which is one to one with ‘Leo’s makin a scene’ from the rottmnt opening like-#‘I’m turning heads and I’m stopping traffic’ -> Leo has not made it a secret that he values his looks a LOT#-not just his looks but also his ability to get people’s attention#‘when I pose they scream when I joke they laugh’ -> I feel like this speaks for itself#-posing and joking for the crowd and himself#‘I’ve got them dazzled like a stage magician’ -> works both with Leo’s canonical love of magicians and his aptitude with tricks in general#‘well everybody needs a friend and I’ve got you and you and you’ -> I just think it’d be cute to imagine his friends here just as his bros#‘I got you and you and you’ = ‘my brainy guy my smashing guy and eats peanut butter with his fingers guy’#‘haven’t you noticed that I’m a star?’ -> Leo loves attention and especially loves when his feats and efforts are acknowledged#+ he loves glam rock and sci-fi and being a champ and - listen he has a LOT of star symbolism with him#‘haven’t you noticed I made it this far’ - Leo is well aware of how dangerous situations get and thinks himself only a part of a whole#-so hey it’s notable that he’s survived this long yeah?#‘now everyone can see me burning’ -> self-sacrificing with his family bearing witness + all his star and flame symbolism in general#+ how attention naturally goes to him - including bad attention where his mistakes are highlighted and burn bright#also even the limo lyric-#obviously this boy has never and will never own a limo but one of his main secondary colors IS pink so even that#okay that one is just a joke but he would#(on that note though I think the other colors the boys gravitate to outside THEIR color are fun to notice)#I don’t actually know too much about Steven universe beyond the songs and some eps but I like the music#and this just came to my tired mind so here you go anyone who’s interested#may draw something with these lyrics dunno yet#it’s a good song in any case even though it’s super short
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Art summary 2024
was quite the year. Onwards to 2025 😊 Happy new year!
#art summary#artists on tumblr#fnaf#markiplier#fanart#as you can see.. I uhhh got a bit too silly. everything is taken over by william afton 😩 oops#I started the car saga in MAY!!!! and ended it in OCTOBER!!??? crazy isn't it?#one rare long project I actually finished and pulled through 😳#I swear I'm normal about him (lie)
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To make it extra clear, all but one of these options occurs in a Direct to Video Animated Scooby-Doo film from the year of 2010 to Present day. Theatrical Releases and TV series are not included here, nor are pre 2010 movies. You vote for the one you think is fake!!
#scooby doo#polls#scooby doo dtv#i did this with mlp not too long ago and it was great fun#actually that may have been a year ago now#but stil
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